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FADE IN:
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A TELEVISION SET
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- tuned to a DOCUMENTARY. As an old fashioned World GLOBE
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rotates in a sea of clouds, the EIFFEL TOWER slowly comes
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into view over the horizon, dwarfing FRANCE underneath it.
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T.V. NARRATOR
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Although each of the world’s
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countries would like to dispute
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this fact, we French know the
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truth; the best food in the World
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is made in France. The best food in
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France is made in Paris, and the
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best food in Paris, some say, is
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made by Chef Auguste Gusteau.
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We see images of GUSTEAU: cooking, signing his cookbook, in
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front of his famous restaurant. Gusteau is in his early
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forties, but his massive girth makes him look older.
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T.V. NARRATOR
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Gusteau’s restaurant is the toast
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of Paris, booked five months in
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advance, and his dazzling ascent to
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the top of Fine French Cuisine has
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made his competitors envious. He is
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the youngest Chef ever to achieve a
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five star rating. Chef Gusteau’s
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cookbook “Anyone Can Cook!” has
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climbed to the top of the best-
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seller list. But not everyone
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celebrates its success.
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A tall, gaunt, severe-looking MAN with fish-belly white
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skin appears on the TV screen. SUPER: ANTON EGO-FOOD
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CRITIC”.
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Beneath that, in italics, is his moniker: The Grim Eater.
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EGO
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Amusing title, “Anyone Can Cook”.
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What’s even more amusing is that
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Gusteau actually seems to believe
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it. I, on the other hand, take
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cooking seriously and no-- I don’t
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think “anyone” can do it --
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TITLES (OVER BLACK):
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The SOUND of wind rattling barren branches --
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2.
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WALT DISNEY PICTURES PRESENTS
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A PIXAR FILM
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FADE IN:
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1 EXT. FRENCH COUNTRYSIDE - LATE AFTERNOON 1
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A light rain falls on a SMALL FARMHOUSE. The last remaining
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dead leaves tremble in the gusts. The quiet is shattered by
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a LOUD GUNSHOT that lights up the inside of the cottage.
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CAMERA pushes down and in toward a single window.
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RATATOUILLE
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As we move closer, we begin to hear muffled SOUNDS OF
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STRUGGLE; furniture being bumped, dishes breaking, an
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indescribable CRASH, followed by an OLD LADY’S SHRIEK.
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We’re close to the WINDOW now, when it is suddenly
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SHATTERED by a COOKBOOK. Instantly the action FREEZES.
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Underneath its splayed pages, shielding himself from the
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shards of splintering glass is, inexplicably, a RAT-REMY.
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He’s scrawny, frightened, almost comic. It’s hard not to
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feel sympathetic towards the little guy.
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REMY (V.O.)
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This is me. I think it’s apparent I
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need to rethink my life a little
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bit. What’s my problem? First of
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all --
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2 EXT. OUTSIDE THE FARMHOUSE - DUSK - WEEKS EARLIER 2
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A SILHOUETTE darts out from behind a wooden barrel, pausing
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upright against a blood red sky. Mangy, sinister, the
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opposite of Remy. This is how most humans see RATS.
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REMY (V.O., CONT'D)
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-- I’m a rat. Which means life is
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hard.
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Assured the coast is clear, the SINISTER RAT scampers out
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into the yard, followed by DOZENS MORE RATS. The RATS move
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across the expanse of grass toward a COMPOST HEAP, which
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sits in the middle of a field under the darkening sky.
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Resourceful and well coordinated, the rats grab bits of
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decomposing food and carry it off. REMY is among them,
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drearily going through garbage.
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3.
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REMY (V.O.)
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And secondly -- I have a highly
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developed sense of taste and smell.
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Suddenly he catches a SCENT; which leads him to uncover a
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nearly untouched piece of PASTRY, a discarded NAPOLEON.
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REMY
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(sniffing Napoleon)
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Flour, eggs, sugar, vanilla bean,
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small twist of lemon --
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The Napoleon suddenly erupts, and out pops Remy’s pudgy
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brother EMILE, covered in cream and completely oblivious to
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the destruction he’s wrought.
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EMILE
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You can smell all that? Wow. You
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have a gift.
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Again the ACTION FREEZES.
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REMY (V.O.)
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This is Emile. My brother. He’s
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easily impressed.
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RESUME ACTION: An older rat, DJANGO, comes into view. He
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snorts dismissively, plucks an APPLE CORE from the compost.
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DJANGO
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So you can smell ingredients. So
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what?
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REMY (V.O.)
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This is my Dad. He’s never
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impressed. He also happens to be
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the leader of our clan.
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Remy catches another scent and FROWNS; this new scent is
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different somehow, wrong. He follows the scent to Django --
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REMY (V.O.)
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So what’s wrong with having highly
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developed senses?
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Django is about to eat the APPLE CORE when Remy lunges at
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him, snatching the core from his hands.
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REMY
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Whoa whoa whoa! DON’T EAT THAT!!
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3 INT. SHED - MINUTES LATER 3
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4.
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Still holding the APPLE CORE, Remy sniffs the air,
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following a scent to a tarp in the corner. He lifts it,
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REVEALING: a can of RAT POISON. The other rats REACT.
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Django’s impressed.
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REMY (V.O.)
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Turns out that funny smell was rat
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poison. Suddenly Dad didn’t think
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my talent was useless. I was
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feeling pretty good about my gift.
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Until Dad gave me a job --
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4 INT. FARMHOUSE - COMPOST PILE - DAY 4
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A line of rats file past REMY, holding up rotted scraps of
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food so that each one passes under his nose.
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REMY (V.O.,CONT’)
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-- that’s right -- “poison
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checker”.
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As Remy sniffs with all the gusto of a lifelong DMV
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employee, the line shuffles forward with each “clean”.
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REMY
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(sniffs before each one)
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Clean. Clean. Clean-erino.
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Cleaneriffic. Close to Godliness --
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The rat under inspection stands there, unsure as to whether
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or not he’s been approved.
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REMY
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-- which means “clean”. You know--
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“Cleanliness is close to--?”
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(no response)
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Remy waits, expecting the rat to get his joke. Beat.
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REMY
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-- never mind. Move on --
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The rat moves on. Remy rolls resumes his bored inspection.
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5 INT. ATTIC - LATE AFTERNOON 5
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Django & Remy stand on a beat-up chair, overlooking the rat
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clan as they go about their day.
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REMY (V.O.)
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Well, it made my Dad proud.
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5.
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DJANGO
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Now don’t you feel better, Remy?
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You’ve helped a noble cause.
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REMY
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Noble? We’re thieves, Dad. And what
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we’re stealing is-- let’s face it,
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garbage.
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DJANGO
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It isn’t stealing if no one wants
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it.
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REMY
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If no one wants it, why are we
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stealing it?
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They continue to quarrel. It’s clear this is an old
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argument.
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REMY (V.O.)
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Let’s just say we have different
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points of view.
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6 INT. ATTIC - NIGHT 6
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Django and Emile are gobbling up an assortment of RUBBISH,
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which is in fact dinner. REMY watches them, appalled. He
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looks down at his own plate in disgust.
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REMY (V.O., CONT’D)
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This much I knew: if you are what
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you eat, then I only want to eat
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the good stuff.
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He pushes the rotted food away. Django reacts.
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REMY (V.O.)
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But to my Dad --
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DJANGO
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Food is fuel. You get picky about
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what you put in the tank, your
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engine is gonna die. Now shut up
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and eat your garbage.
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REMY
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If we’re going to be thieves, why
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not steal the good stuff in the
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kitchen? Where nothing is poisoned.
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DJANGO
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6.
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First of all; we are NOT thieves.
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Secondly; Stay out of the kitchen
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and away from the humans. It’s
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dangerous.
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7 EXT. OUTSIDE THE FARMHOUSE - DUSK 7
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Remy watches the farmhouse, drawn to the warm light and the
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sounds emanating from inside.
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REMY (V.O.)
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I know I’m supposed to hate humans.
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But there’s something about them --
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8 INT. FARMHOUSE - KITCHEN 8
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Remy carefully sneaks into the kitchen.
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REMY (V.O., CONT’)
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-- they don’t just survive, they
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discover, they create. Just look at
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what they do with food.
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The TV is tuned to the same show we saw in the opening.
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CHEF GUSTEAU is cooking, speaking to the camera. Remy
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watches.
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GUSTEAU (ON T.V.)
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Good food is like music you can
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taste, color you can smell. There
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is excellence all around you. You
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need only be aware to stop and
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savor it.
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Remy notices a leftover plate of FRUITS & CHEESES. He picks
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up a small slice of cheese and takes a bite.
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REMY (V.O.)
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Gusteau was right. Each flavor was
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totally unique.
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As Remy closes his eyes his surroundings FADE TO BLACK. A
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amorphus COLORED SHAPE appears above his head accompanied
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by a cello bass line.
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REMY (V.O., CONT’)
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Oh, yeah. Amazing. But combine one
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flavor with another --
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Cheese still in his mouth, Remy takes a bite of the
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STRAWBERRY.
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7.
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REMY
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-- and something new was created.
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New COLORED SHAPES and musical signatures appear; swirling
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and dancing in harmony with the others.
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A light SNAPS ON, breaking the spell. The OLD LADY has
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awakened. Remy drops the food and scampers away.
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9 EXT. FIELD - DAY 9
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Remy follows a pleasant scent in the air. It leads him to a
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beautiful MUSHROOM.
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REMY (V.O.)
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So now I had a secret life. The
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only one who knew about it was
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Emile.
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10 EXT. BEHIND THE FARMHOUSE - LATE AFTERNOON 10
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Emile is atop a full garbage can, rooting around under the
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lid. Remy calls up from the tall grass below.
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REMY
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Emile! Psst- hey, Emile --!
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Emile looks up, holding the remains of a brown-bag lunch.
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REMY
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(giddy)
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Look! I found a mushroom! Come on,
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you’re good at hiding food, help me
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find a good place to put this!
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11 EXT. GRASSY FIELD - LATE AFTERNOON 11
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Remy and Emile walk together; Emile on all fours, dragging
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the enormous bag he grips between his teeth, while Remy
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walks upright, carefully cradling his mushroom.
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REMY (V.O.)
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He doesn’t under-stand me, but I
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can be myself around him --
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EMILE
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Why are you walking like that?
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REMY
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8.
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I don’t want to constantly have to
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wash my paws. Do you ever think
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about how we walk on the same paws
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that we handle food with? Do you
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ever think about what we put into
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our mouths??
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EMILE
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All the time.
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REMY
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(he shudders)
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When I eat, I don’t want to taste
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everywhere my paws have been.
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EMILE
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Well, okay. But if Dad sees you
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walking like that, he’s not gonna
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like it.
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Remy SNIFFS Emile’s BAG. His eyes LIGHT UP.
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REMY
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What have you got there?
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He disappears into the bag, RIFLES through it, emerging
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with --
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REMY
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Cheese?? You found CHEESE? And not
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just any cheese -- Tomme De Chevre
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de Pays! That would go beautifully
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with my mushroom!! And! And and and
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--
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He sniffs the air, quickly finds a plant nearby. He PLUCKS
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it from the ground, his excitement growing by the second.
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REMY
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-- this rosemary!! With, maybe with
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--
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He grabs a paw full of grass from the ground, tasting the
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milky base. Smiling, he squeezes a few drops on the
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mushroom.
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REMY
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-- a few drops from this sweet
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grass!
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EMILE
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Well -- throw it on the pile I
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guess, and we’ll --
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9.
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REMY
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We don’t want to throw this in with
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the garbage! This is special!
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EMILE
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But we gotta return to the colony
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before sundown or Dad’s gonna --
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REMY
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Emile! There are possibilities
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unexplored here. We’ve gotta cook
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this! Now, exactly how we cook this
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is the real questi --
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Remy STOPS, his gaze locking on the SMOKING CHIMNEY atop
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the farmhouse roof. He GRINS.
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REMY
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-- ooooohh yeah. Come on!
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12 EXT. ROOFTOP - LATER 12
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Remy has skewered the mushroom and cheese onto part of the
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TV antennae, which he has bent over the smoking chimney
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top, hand turning it like a rotisserie.
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REMY
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The key is to keep turning it, get
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the smoky flavor nice and even --
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Lightning flickers in the far distance, followed a moment
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later by a RUMBLE of thunder. Emile watches, concerned.
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EMILE
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That storm’s getting closer. Hey,
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you think that maybe we shouldn’t -
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-
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KRAAAK!!! A BOLT OF LIGHTNING hits the TV antennae,
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knocking both rats off the rooftop. They make a LONG FALL,
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landing with a THUD into a the soft dirt.
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Miraculously, Remy and Emile are alive, their smoking fur
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sticks out in an electrified frazzle. Remy holds the rod
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up, keeping the cheesy mushroom, now transformed by
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lightning into an amazing, puffed out shape, completely
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clean.
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REMY
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(moaning)
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Whoaaa -- ohhh --
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(idly bites mushroom)
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10.
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-- ohmmmmmnnn you gotta taste
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this!!! It’s got this kind of --
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(smacks lips)
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-- burny, melty -- it’s not really
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a smoky flavor, it’s a certain --
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it’s kind of like a --
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(makes a sound effect)
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-- it’s got a --
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(sound effect)
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-- kind of taste, don’t you think?
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What would you call that flavor?
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EMILE
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Lightning-y?
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REMY
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Yeah! It’s LIGHTNING-Y! We’ve gotta
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do that AGAIN! Okay. When the next
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storm comes we’ll go up on the roof
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--
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Remy’s eyes suddenly go BLANK with a pre-emptive thought.
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REMY
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I KNOW WHAT THIS NEEDS! Saffron! a
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little saffron would MAKE THIS!
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13 INR. FARMHOUSE KITCHEN - MINUTES LATER 13
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Emile frets, looking nervously at the old lady, still fast
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asleep in front of the TV. Remy RUMMAGES through her
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spices.
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REMY
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Saffron -- saffron -- hmn --
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EMILE
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Not good. Don’t like it. She’s
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gonna wake up.
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REMY
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I’ve been down here a million
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times. She turns on the cooking
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channel-- boom. Never wakes up.
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EMILE
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You’ve been here a million times??
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REMY
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(resumes rooting)
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I’m telling ya, saffron’ll be just
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the thing. Gusteau swears by it.
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11.
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EMILE
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Okay, who’s Gusteau?
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Remy pushes aside some COOKBOOKS, revealing a well-worn
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copy of “AUGUST GUSTEAU’S ANYONE CAN COOK!” on the shelf.
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EMILE
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Wait-- you read?
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REMY
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(guilty)
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Well, not -- excessively.
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EMILE
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Oh, man. Does dad know?
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REMY
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You could fill a book -- a LOT of
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books -- with things dad doesn’t
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know. And they have. Which is why I
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read.
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(pointed)
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Which is also our secret.
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He resumes rummaging through the spices. Emile FRETS.
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EMILE
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I don’t like secrets. All this
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cooking and reading and TV watching
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while we read and cook. It’s like
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you’re involving me in crime. And I
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let you. Why do I let you?
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14 INT. FARMHOUSE ATTIC - SAME MOMENT 14
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RATS stream in from a crack in the wall, throwing food from
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the compost pile on to a heap. DJANGO is at the center,
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overseeing things. He turns away, distracted --
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DJANGO
|
|
What’s taking those kids so long?
|
|
|
|
|
|
15 INT. KITCHEN - REMY AND EMILE 15
|
|
|
|
Remy locates a tiny vial of saffron, holds it up.
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
Ah. Aquila saffron. Italian.
|
|
Gusteau says it’s excellent. Good
|
|
thing the old lady is a food lov--
|
|
12.
|
|
|
|
|
|
Something on the TV attracts Remy’s attention; the great
|
|
Chef Gusteau is being interviewed.
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
-- hey! That’s Gusteau! Emile, look
|
|
--
|
|
|
|
GUSTEAU (TV)
|
|
Great cooking is not for the faint
|
|
of heart. You must be imaginative,
|
|
strong-hearted, you must try things
|
|
that may not work. And you must not
|
|
let anyone define your limits
|
|
because of where you come from.
|
|
Your only limit is your soul. What
|
|
I say is true, anyone can cook but
|
|
only the fearless can be great.
|
|
|
|
Remy grins, nodding in agreement.
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
Pure poetry.
|
|
|
|
TV NARRATOR
|
|
But it was not to last. Gusteau’s
|
|
restaurant lost one of its five
|
|
stars after a scathing review by
|
|
France’s top food critic Arnot Ego.
|
|
|
|
Remy drifts closer to the TV, drawn to the shocking news.
|
|
|
|
TV NARRATOR
|
|
It was a severe blow to Gusteau,
|
|
and the great Chef died shortly
|
|
afterward, which, according to
|
|
tradition, meant the loss of
|
|
another star.
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
(stunned)
|
|
Gusteau is dead?
|
|
|
|
Suddenly the TV SNAPS OFF! Remy & Emile spin around to see
|
|
the OLD LADY is awake and WIELDING A SHOT GUN.
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
RUN!!
|
|
|
|
Remy and Emile SCATTER! Emile panics, races toward the
|
|
attic.
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
NO! You’ll lead her to the colony!
|
|
13.
|
|
|
|
|
|
The Lady BLASTS huge holes in the ceiling just behind the
|
|
scrambling Emile. He LEAPS CLEAR and lands on the end of a
|
|
HANGING LIGHT FIXTURE. The old lady has him. She levels the
|
|
gun barrel at the helplessly dangling Emile.
|
|
|
|
REMY hides his eyes. EMILE braces for the end. CLICK.
|
|
|
|
The shotgun is EMPTY. The OLD LADY REACTS: WHAT? EMILE
|
|
REACTS: Huh? I’m not dead? REMY LOOKS UP: Emile is still
|
|
alive? The OLD LADY curses, ejecting the shells.
|
|
|
|
EMILE SEES his opportunity, starts SCRAMBLING to pull
|
|
himself up onto the light. THE OLD LADY SEES THIS and
|
|
rushes for more shells. REMY sees an opening and takes off
|
|
to help Emile.
|
|
|
|
Rifling through her desk drawers, the OLD LADY SPIES REMY
|
|
coming out of hiding to help EMILE. She REDOUBLES HER
|
|
EFFORTS to find a box of shells.
|
|
|
|
EMILE struggles his fat body up to the precarious LIGHT
|
|
FIXTURE.
|
|
|
|
EMILE
|
|
Help! Remy! Help!
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
Emile, start swinging the light!
|
|
I’ll try to grab you!
|
|
|
|
OLD LADY hears Remy calling for Emile, but from her POV all
|
|
we hear is a SQUEAKING SOUND. OLD LADY finds a SHELL BOX:
|
|
EMPTY. She YANKS OPEN another desk drawer.
|
|
|
|
REMY arrives at the light fixture, reaches out for EMILE.
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
Emile! Swing to me!
|
|
|
|
Remy looks up, considering the streets above. He looks back
|
|
to the illustration. Gusteau has resumed his frozen pose.
|
|
|
|
OLD LADY, nothing in the drawer, she decides to look in the
|
|
book shelf, LOOKING BACK to see if the TWO RATS are still
|
|
together and struggling, still sitting ducks.
|
|
|
|
Finding no shells in the desk, the LADY goes for the
|
|
cabinet, LOOKING BACK to the TWO sitting duck RATS. The
|
|
lady FINDS a fresh box of SHELLS, spilling them in her
|
|
excitement.
|
|
|
|
REMY STRAINS to lift EMILE. The LADY drops to her knees,
|
|
picks up a shell, loading it as EMILE’s feet get purchase.
|
|
14.
|
|
|
|
|
|
The LADY chambers her SHELL and SWINGS the SHOTGUN AROUND.
|
|
|
|
The RATS scramble up into a new blast hole at the base of a
|
|
hanging fixture. It EXPLODES in buckshot!
|
|
|
|
SILENCE.
|
|
|
|
Then a loud CRACK.
|
|
|
|
The lady LOOKS UP: a large FISSURE snakes across the
|
|
ceiling, connecting the wide circle of SHOTGUN HOLES, a
|
|
massive CHUNK OF CEILING breaks free and comes crashing
|
|
down, bringing with it the FLOOR of the ATTIC above, its
|
|
furniture, and HUNDREDS OF SURPRISED RATS.
|
|
|
|
The Old Lady FREAKS! She runs from the room.
|
|
|
|
DJANGO
|
|
EVACUATE!!! EVERYONE TO THE BOATS!
|
|
|
|
RATS grab assorted belongings as they make their escape.
|
|
Remy and Emile run with the terrified mob. Suddenly, Remy
|
|
stops, looks back to Gusteau’s COOKBOOK --
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
The book!
|
|
|
|
-- and TURNS BACK, rushing into the flood of fleeing rats!
|
|
|
|
|
|
16 EXT. OUTSIDE THE FARMHOUSE - CONTINUOUS 16
|
|
|
|
RATS are diving out the windows, streaming through cracks,
|
|
racing across the grass to the banks of a nearby stream.
|
|
|
|
|
|
17 EXT. BY THE STREAM - CONTINUOUS 17
|
|
|
|
The rats run into the tall grass, pulling aside camouflage,
|
|
REVEALING several WATERCRAFT built from junk. The RATS push
|
|
them into the water and climb aboard. DJANGO urges them on.
|
|
|
|
DJANGO
|
|
GO GO GO! MOVE MOVE MOVE!
|
|
|
|
|
|
18 INT. THE FARMHOUSE KITCHEN 18
|
|
|
|
Remy, the last remaining rat, struggles with GUSTEAU’S
|
|
COOKBOOK. A strange BREATHING SOUND causes him to look up:
|
|
the LADY is back, now sporting a World War 2 GAS MASK, and
|
|
GAS CANISTER. She starts after Remy, SPRAYING GAS
|
|
everywhere.
|
|
15.
|
|
|
|
|
|
With a burst of adrenaline Remy hoists the COOKBOOK onto
|
|
his back and makes a running LEAP through the window --
|
|
|
|
|
|
19 EXT. OUTSIDE THE FARMHOUSE 19
|
|
|
|
-- and lands on the lawn in a shower of glass. It appears
|
|
the COOKBOOK itself is struggling to catch up to the
|
|
fleeing rats.
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
Wait! Wait for me!
|
|
|
|
|
|
20 EXT. ON THE RIVER 20
|
|
|
|
RAIN starts to fall. The last RAT BOAT has shoved off from
|
|
shore, but DJANGO’s boat lingers under the FOOTBRIDGE.
|
|
|
|
DJANGO
|
|
Everybody here? We have everybody?
|
|
Wait a minute, where’s Remy?!
|
|
|
|
At the shore, Remy throws the book into the water and
|
|
starts paddling toward the tunnel after the colony.
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
Right here! I’m coming! I’m coming!
|
|
|
|
DJANGO
|
|
Hold on son!
|
|
(to other rats)
|
|
Give him something to grab on to!
|
|
|
|
GIT, a huge, muscular lab rat, grabs a SPATULA and hoists
|
|
it out over the water toward Remy.
|
|
|
|
DJANGO
|
|
Come on boy!
|
|
|
|
Remy reaches out, desperately paddling with his other paw.
|
|
|
|
DJANGO
|
|
Paddle son! Come on, reach for it!
|
|
You can do it!
|
|
|
|
Remy has almost reached the end of the spatula BLAM!
|
|
|
|
A BLAST hits the water, sends Remy flying backward. The OLD
|
|
LADY has taken position at the footbridge above. She FIRES
|
|
at Django’s boat, missing as his boat enters the tunnel.
|
|
|
|
DJANGO
|
|
16.
|
|
|
|
|
|
Remy!
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
Dad!
|
|
|
|
DJANGO
|
|
Come on, you can make it! You can
|
|
make it!
|
|
|
|
Remy climbs back aboard the cookbook and PADDLES into the
|
|
drainpipe before the LADY can get off a shot. She CURSES.
|
|
|
|
|
|
21 INT. TUNNEL - CONTINUOUS 21
|
|
|
|
Remy paddles. Ahead, Django’s BOAT vanishes into the dark.
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
Guys wait! Stop! Hold up! Wait for
|
|
me! Hold UP!
|
|
|
|
Remy decides to go.
|
|
|
|
Frightened SHOUTS echo into SILENCE.
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
DAD??
|
|
(no response)
|
|
Dad?
|
|
|
|
Silence. Remy strains to see into the darkness. He begins
|
|
to make out SHAPES; the channel forking into TWO TUNNELS.
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
Which way?
|
|
|
|
He paddles towards the right tunnel, changes his mind,
|
|
veers toward the left. He paddles, picking up speed. Then
|
|
he hears a LOW RUMBLE.
|
|
|
|
He stops, suddenly alert. The rumble becomes a ROAR. Remy
|
|
whirls, PADDLES furiously the opposite direction. He’s
|
|
headed toward the edge of a waterfall!
|
|
|
|
But it’s too late. Over the edge go Remy and the COOKBOOK,
|
|
tumbling into the rapids below.
|
|
|
|
Remy is tossed about like a rag doll, buffeted in every
|
|
direction by the churning water. He struggles for air
|
|
finally breaking the surface, he GULPS a breath and is
|
|
PLUNGED back under.
|
|
17.
|
|
|
|
|
|
The stone walls blur past him as he claws back to the
|
|
surface. Through the tumult he spies his one chance up
|
|
ahead-- the COOKBOOK. He swims toward it, finally catching
|
|
it, he pulls himself aboard.
|
|
|
|
The rapids pass, the waters become calm. He looks back,
|
|
amazed he’s still alive. He collapses, exhausted.
|
|
|
|
DISSOLVE TO:
|
|
|
|
|
|
22 INT. SOMEWHERE IN THE SEWER SYSTEM - NIGHT 22
|
|
|
|
A soaked and exhausted Remy has pulled his battered
|
|
cookbook to the sewer bank. It’s dark and cold, it smells
|
|
bad, but he’s safe. Maybe the clan will find him. He waits.
|
|
|
|
The COOKBOOK has dried out a bit, and there is just enough
|
|
light seeping through a grate above for Remy to read it.
|
|
|
|
REMY (V.O.)
|
|
I waited. For a sound -- a voice --
|
|
a sign. Something --
|
|
|
|
Remy flips a crinkled page, to a appetizing photo of
|
|
pastry.
|
|
|
|
His stomach GROWLS. He looks away, turning to a drawing of
|
|
GUSTEAU on the opposite page.
|
|
|
|
The ILLUSTRATION comes to life; speaking to Remy--
|
|
|
|
GUSTEAU
|
|
If you are hungry, go up and look
|
|
around, Remy. Why do you wait and
|
|
mope?
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
I’ve just lost my family. All my
|
|
friends. Probably forever.
|
|
|
|
GUSTEAU
|
|
How do you know?
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
Well, I --
|
|
(what is he doing?)
|
|
You are an illustration. Why am I
|
|
talking to you?
|
|
|
|
GUSTEAU
|
|
(shrugs)
|
|
18.
|
|
|
|
|
|
You just lost your family. All your
|
|
friends. You are lonely.
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
Yeah, well, you’re dead.
|
|
|
|
GUSTEAU
|
|
Ah, but that is no match for
|
|
wishful thinking. If you focus on
|
|
what you’ve left behind you will
|
|
never be able to see what lies
|
|
ahead. Now go up and look around.
|
|
|
|
Remy looks up, considering the streets above. He looks back
|
|
to the illustration. Gusteau has resumed his frozen pose.
|
|
Remy decides to go.
|
|
|
|
WE FOLLOW REMY
|
|
|
|
as he scurries up into a BUILDING, between walls, through
|
|
pipes, under floors,allowing GLIMPSES into the HUMAN world
|
|
around him. Remy moves through a crack, emerges into --
|
|
|
|
|
|
23 INT. APARTMENT KITCHEN 23
|
|
|
|
In the next room A PARTY is in progress. Remy spies a loaf
|
|
of BREAD. Famished, he grabs it, prepares to take a bite
|
|
when a SPRITE in the form of GUSTEAU appears, smaller than
|
|
Remy, glowing and semi-transparent.
|
|
|
|
GUSTEAU
|
|
What are you doing?!!
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
(startled, defensive)
|
|
I’m hungry! I don’t know where I am
|
|
and I don’t know when I’ll find
|
|
food again --
|
|
|
|
GUSTEAU
|
|
Remy. You are better than that. You
|
|
are a cook! Cooks make. Thieves
|
|
take. You are not a thief.
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
(reconsidering)
|
|
But I am hungry --
|
|
|
|
GUSTEAU
|
|
Food will come, Remy. Food always
|
|
comes to those who love to cook --
|
|
19.
|
|
|
|
|
|
The GUSTEAU SPRITE VANISHES. Remy shakes it off. He puts
|
|
the bread down, denying his growing hunger, and moves on.
|
|
|
|
|
|
24 INT. BETWEEN THE WALLS 24
|
|
|
|
Remy MOVES, following his exceptional nose. We see glimpses
|
|
of many French lives;
|
|
|
|
A PAINTER carefully paints a nude model we can’t see.
|
|
|
|
An DOG barks aggressively, warning Remy away from his flat.
|
|
|
|
A LOVERS QUARREL. Remy watches from above, through a crack
|
|
in the ceiling; SHE shakily waves a pistol at a defiant HE.
|
|
|
|
QUARRELING WOMAN
|
|
You think I am playing, Francois?
|
|
You think I am PLAYING??
|
|
|
|
QUARRELING MAN
|
|
You don’t have the guts!
|
|
|
|
Losing interest, Remy moves on. A BULLET splinters the
|
|
floor in front of him. Remy rushes back to the crack and
|
|
SEES the couple struggling with the smoking gun. The MAN
|
|
wrenches it free, it clatters to the floor. They glare at
|
|
each other, blood in their eyes and KISS.
|
|
|
|
Remy rolls his eyes and moves on, through dark, tight
|
|
spaces into a pipe and emerges onto --
|
|
|
|
|
|
25 EXY. OUTSIDE THE BUILDING - ROOFTOPS - DUSK 25
|
|
|
|
CAMERA follows as Remy scampers along railings and ledges,
|
|
past windows, up vines, BOOMING UP as the ROOFTOP FALLS
|
|
AWAY TO REVEAL --
|
|
|
|
A STUNNING PANORAMA; PARIS AT NIGHT.
|
|
|
|
It is GORGEOUS, a vast, luminous jewel. Remy is GOBSMACKED.
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
Paris? All this time I’ve been
|
|
underneath PARIS? It’s beautiful.
|
|
|
|
Remy’s takes in the sea of shimmering lights then sees a
|
|
HUGE SIGN atop a building several blocks away. It’s
|
|
GUSTEAU, a frying pan in each hand. The SIGN marvels at the
|
|
panorama.
|
|
|
|
GUSTEAU SIGN
|
|
20.
|
|
|
|
|
|
The MOST beautiful.
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
Gusteau’s? Your restaurant?? You’ve
|
|
led me to your restaurant!
|
|
|
|
GUSTEAU SIGN
|
|
(not entirely sure)
|
|
It seems as though I have. Yes.
|
|
There it is! I have led you to it!
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
I gotta see this --
|
|
|
|
Remy heads off toward the restaurant.
|
|
|
|
|
|
26 INT. KITCHEN - GUSTEAU’S RESTAURANT 26
|
|
|
|
WAITERS and COOKS bustle back and forth preparing elaborate
|
|
meals with energetic precision; the complex dance of Haute
|
|
Cuisine. Professional cooking at its finest.
|
|
|
|
While the COOKS range wildly in age and nationality, only
|
|
one is female; a French cook in her late twenties named
|
|
COLETTE.
|
|
|
|
A small, nasty-looking MAN sporting a thin mustache and a
|
|
toque almost as large as the rest of him, ENTERS. This is
|
|
the head Chef, SKINNER. Several COOKS call out greetings to
|
|
him.
|
|
|
|
He looks annoyed as LA ROUSSE nudges him.
|
|
|
|
LA ROUSSE
|
|
Hey boss! Look who’s here! This is
|
|
Linguini, Renata’s little boy.
|
|
|
|
La Rousse gestures to LINGUINI, a gawky young man with a
|
|
unruly mop of red hair sitting on a stool in the corner. He
|
|
jumps up and awkwardly approaches Skinner.
|
|
|
|
LA ROUSSE
|
|
All grown up, eh? You remember
|
|
Renata, Gusteau’s old flame?
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
(distracted)
|
|
Ahh yes. How are you, uh --
|
|
|
|
LA ROUSSE
|
|
Linguini.
|
|
21.
|
|
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
Yes. Linguini. So nice of you to
|
|
visit. How is--?
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
My mother.
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
Renata.
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
(impatient)
|
|
Yes. Renata. How is she?
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
Good. Well, not g-- she’s been
|
|
better -- I mean, uh --
|
|
|
|
HORST
|
|
She died.
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
Oh. I’m sorry.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
Don’t be. She believed in heaven so
|
|
she’s-- covered --
|
|
(awkward)
|
|
-- you know. Afterlife wise.
|
|
|
|
Skinner stares at Linguini for a long, perplexed moment.
|
|
|
|
Linguini suddenly hands a sealed envelope to him.
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
What’s this?
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
She left it for you. I think she
|
|
hoped it would help. Me. Get a job.
|
|
Here--?
|
|
|
|
LA ROUSSE
|
|
Of course, Gusteau wouldn’t
|
|
hesitate. Any son of Renata’s--
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
(cutting him off)
|
|
Yes. Well, we could file this, and
|
|
if something suitable opens up--
|
|
|
|
LA ROUSSE
|
|
We’ve already hired him.
|
|
22.
|
|
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
(outraged)
|
|
What?! How dare you hire someone
|
|
without my --
|
|
|
|
HORST
|
|
We needed a garbage boy.
|
|
|
|
Skinner processes this, calming as he does.
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
Oh. Garbage. Well --
|
|
(to Linguini, thin smile)
|
|
-- I’m glad it worked out.
|
|
|
|
Skinner disappears into his office, which once belonged to
|
|
the great Gusteau himself. Linguini turns back to the other
|
|
cooks, who are already handing him his work clothes.
|
|
|
|
|
|
27 EXT. ROOFTOP - ABOVE GUSTEAU’S KITCHEN - MINUTES LATER 27
|
|
|
|
Remy and the Gusteau sprite look down through the SKYLIGHT
|
|
into GUSTEAU’S kitchen. Remy watches, rapt as the CHEFS
|
|
scurry about, preparing the gourmet meals.
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
I can’t believe it. A real gourmet
|
|
kitchen and I get to watch.
|
|
|
|
GUSTEAU
|
|
You’ve read my book. Let us see how
|
|
much you know. Which is the Chef?
|
|
|
|
Remy points out SKINNER, who is berating another cook.
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
That guy.
|
|
|
|
GUSTEAU
|
|
Very good. Who is next in command?
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
The Sous Chef there.
|
|
(points out HORST)
|
|
The Sous is responsible for the
|
|
kitchen when the Chef’s not there.
|
|
|
|
REMY’S POV: ISOLATING THE COOKS as Remy points them out.
|
|
|
|
REMY (O.C.)
|
|
23.
|
|
|
|
|
|
Saucier; in charge of sauces, very
|
|
important. Chef de Partie, DemiChef
|
|
de Partie -- both important --
|
|
(pointing)
|
|
Commis, Commis, Commis they’re
|
|
cooks. Very important.
|
|
|
|
GUSTEAU
|
|
You are a clever rat. Now, who is
|
|
that?
|
|
|
|
Gusteau is pointing at the garbage boy LINGUINI, who is
|
|
clumsily steering a mop and bucket through the kitchen.
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
Oh, him? He’s nobody.
|
|
|
|
GUSTEAU
|
|
Not nobody. He is part of the
|
|
kitchen.
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
(dismissive)
|
|
He’s a Plongeur or something.
|
|
Washes dishes or takes out the
|
|
garbage. He doesn’t cook.
|
|
|
|
GUSTEAU
|
|
But he could.
|
|
|
|
Below, LINGUINI accidentally knocks over the pot of soup,
|
|
spilling it. Remy gives Gusteau a patronizing chuckle.
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
No.
|
|
|
|
What WE SEE, but Remy doesn’t: desperate that no one
|
|
notices his mistake, Linguini quickly replaces the pot on
|
|
the burner, and MOPS up the floor.
|
|
|
|
GUSTEAU
|
|
How do you know? What do I always
|
|
say? “Anyone can cook”.
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
Well, yeah. Anyone can. That
|
|
doesn’t mean that anyone should.
|
|
|
|
GUSTEAU
|
|
Well that is not stopping him. See?
|
|
24.
|
|
|
|
|
|
Remy watches aghast as Linguini quickly chums some water
|
|
from another pot into the soup to refill it to it’s former
|
|
level, haphazardly throws in a few spices and vegetables.
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
No! This is terrible! He’s ruining
|
|
the soup! And nobody’s noticing?!
|
|
It’s your restaurant! Do something!
|
|
|
|
GUSTEAU
|
|
What can I do? I am a figment of
|
|
your imagination --
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
But HE’S RUINING THE SOUP! We’ve
|
|
got to tell someone that he’s R --
|
|
|
|
The skylight suddenly gives way, and Remy PLUNGES down--
|
|
|
|
|
|
28 INT. GUSTEAU’S KITCHEN 28
|
|
|
|
With a SPLASH Remy lands in a sink filled with soapy
|
|
dishwater. He paddles to the surface, climbs onto the
|
|
counter and tumbles over the edge, hitting the floor with a
|
|
SPLAT.
|
|
|
|
|
|
29 INT. KITCHEN FLOOR - UNDER THE COUNTER - CONTINUOUS 29
|
|
|
|
Remy HIDES. GIANT FEET (belonging to busy COOKS) boom by on
|
|
either side. Surrounded by the enemies of rat kind, Remy is
|
|
PETRIFIED. From REMY’S POV the kitchen is a terrifying
|
|
place; full of FIRE and NOISE. He runs out from under the
|
|
counter.
|
|
|
|
The door to the walk-in OPENS, knocking Remy across the
|
|
floor and under the stove. Above him rows of burners
|
|
IGNITE.
|
|
|
|
He races across a walkway, under another counter and out
|
|
the other side, nearly run over by a DINING CART. REMY
|
|
dives underneath it, using it to cross the kitchen
|
|
camouflaged.
|
|
|
|
Sticking his head out, Remy spots an OPEN WINDOW on the far
|
|
wall: a way out! He runs for it, climbing up a dish rack to
|
|
the counter. He is nearly to the OPEN WINDOW.
|
|
|
|
He scrambles up onto a copper pot toward it, but the lid
|
|
slips and he falls inside. He LOOKS UP.
|
|
|
|
REMY’S POV: OUT FROM UNDER THE POT LID
|
|
25.
|
|
|
|
|
|
-- the window is MOVING AWAY. What’s happening?!
|
|
|
|
WIDEN TO REVEAL--
|
|
|
|
-- the POT is being carried away by one of the COOKS. The
|
|
chef sets the pot down near a stove and exits. As Remy
|
|
heads back toward the window, a wonderful SCENT hits his
|
|
nose. He SNIFFS, following it to a PAN filled with
|
|
vegetables.
|
|
|
|
Enticed, he crawls inside, and it is only then that he
|
|
notices the LARGE TURKEY, moments before a COOK picks up
|
|
the pan and slides it into the oven!
|
|
|
|
Remy barely escapes before the oven door CLOSES, SPRINGING
|
|
from the oven to another passing trolley, which bursts
|
|
into--
|
|
|
|
|
|
30 INT. THE DINING ROOM - CONTINUOUS 30
|
|
|
|
Remy is wheeled into the plush hush of the restaurant, and
|
|
pulls up to a table of well-dressed DINERS. A WAITERS HAND
|
|
reaches down for a peppermill, grabbing REMY instead which
|
|
startles both of them. The HAND instantly RELEASES Remy,
|
|
who quickly leaps on to another passing trolley, the one
|
|
heading back to the kitchen.
|
|
|
|
|
|
31 INT. GUSTEAU’S KITCHEN - CONTINUOUS 31
|
|
|
|
Remy jumps off the trolley and hides. He looks up at the
|
|
window --
|
|
|
|
REMY’S POV
|
|
|
|
-- the WINDOW has been CLOSED! Linguini crosses into his
|
|
view and tastes the soup. It’s horrible, so horrible that
|
|
he runs to the window, opens it, SPITS the soup out into
|
|
the alley and exits LEAVING THE WINDOW OPEN.
|
|
|
|
RESUME REMY
|
|
|
|
He sees his opening and runs for it, climbing a broom
|
|
handle to a shelf above the stove that leads to the OPEN
|
|
WINDOW.
|
|
|
|
Dodging jars of spices he runs through the steam from the
|
|
soup bubbling directly below. It’s so disgusting that
|
|
without thinking, he grabs a spice from the counter, throws
|
|
a dash in. He starts for the window, thinks better of it,
|
|
adds some leeks, adds some pepper, starts back to the
|
|
window and STOPS.
|
|
26.
|
|
|
|
|
|
His gaze returns to the boiling pot. He looks back at the
|
|
kitchen: the cooks haven’t noticed him. He looks at the
|
|
window: it is still open, and the path to it is clear.
|
|
|
|
The GUSTEAU SPRITE APPEARS--
|
|
|
|
GUSTEAU
|
|
Remy! What are you waiting for?
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
Is this going to become a regular
|
|
thing with you?
|
|
|
|
GUSTEAU
|
|
You know how to fix it. This is
|
|
your chance.
|
|
|
|
Remy considers this. Then, filled with purpose, he jumps to
|
|
the stove top, turns the burner down, hops up to the spigot
|
|
to add water to the soup.
|
|
|
|
Quickly losing himself, Remy proceeds to remake the soup,
|
|
alternately smelling, tasting and adding ingredients to it.
|
|
|
|
He grabs a pawful of spices to toss in and SUDDENLY SEES
|
|
LINGUINI, wide-eyed and brandishing a ladle.
|
|
|
|
They STARE at each other for a long moment, deer caught in
|
|
each others headlights. Remy drops the spices into the
|
|
soup.
|
|
|
|
SKINNER (OS)
|
|
THE SOUP! WHERE IS THE SOUP?
|
|
|
|
The two STARTLE; Remy tries to run for the window. Linguini
|
|
slams a colander over him, both hiding and trapping him.
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
Out of my way, Garbage boy!
|
|
|
|
Skinner spots the ladle in Linguini’s hand. He seizes
|
|
Linguini by his collar.
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
You are COOKING? How dare you cook
|
|
in my kitchen!
|
|
|
|
Remy starts to push the colander toward the open window.
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
27.
|
|
|
|
|
|
Where do you get the gall to even
|
|
attempt something so monumentally
|
|
idiotic? I should have you drawn
|
|
and quartered! I’ll do it! I think
|
|
the law is on my side!
|
|
(calling out)
|
|
LaRousse! Draw and quarter this
|
|
man! AFTER you put his head in the
|
|
duck press to squeeze the fat out!
|
|
|
|
As Skinner berates Linguini, LALO ladles the soup into a
|
|
tureen, which he takes to the pass. Linguini watches
|
|
helplessly as the waiter MUSTAFA carries his soup out to
|
|
the dining room.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
Oh, no... no no, ohhhh nooo--
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
What are you blathering about?!
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
(points, dumbstruck)
|
|
-but don’t let- th-- sou -- soup--!
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
Soup?
|
|
(suddenly understands)
|
|
STOP THAT SOUP! Noooo!
|
|
|
|
But Mustafa is gone and it is TOO LATE. Skinner anxiously
|
|
looks through the door windows into the dining room--
|
|
|
|
SKINNER’S POV: THE DINING ROOM
|
|
|
|
--the soup is served to a WOMAN DINER. She tastes it,
|
|
REACTS visibly, and motions for the waiter.
|
|
|
|
|
|
32 INT. RESUME KITCHEN - GUSTEAU & SKINNER 32
|
|
|
|
Wilting, Skinner turns his building rage toward Linguini.
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
Linguini! You’re FIRED! F-I-R-E-D!
|
|
FIRED!
|
|
|
|
MUSTAFA, the waiter, sticks his head through the double-
|
|
doors, speaking low to Skinner.
|
|
|
|
MUSTAFA
|
|
She wants to speak to the Chef.
|
|
28.
|
|
|
|
|
|
Color drains from Skinner’s face. He sighs, heads out into
|
|
the dining room to take his medicine. Linguini creeps
|
|
toward the exit, but is collared by the Sous Chef HORST.
|
|
|
|
On the counter, Remy inches the colander towards the
|
|
window. Colette sticks a spoon into the soup and tastes.
|
|
It’s GOOD.
|
|
|
|
Mustafa and Skinner re-enter from the dining room,
|
|
Skinner’s face a riot of bewilderment.
|
|
|
|
COLETTE
|
|
What did the customer say?
|
|
|
|
MUSTAFA
|
|
It wasn’t a customer. It was a
|
|
critic.
|
|
|
|
COLETTE
|
|
(fearful)
|
|
Ego??
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
(dazed)
|
|
Solene LeClaire.
|
|
|
|
COLETTE
|
|
LeClaire? What did she say?
|
|
|
|
MUSTAFA
|
|
She liked the soup.
|
|
|
|
|
|
33 INT. UNDER THE COLANDER 33
|
|
|
|
The GUSTEAU SPRITE stops Remy.
|
|
|
|
GUSTEAU
|
|
Wait--
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
What do mean “wait’? You’re the
|
|
reason I’m in this mess!
|
|
|
|
GUSTEAU
|
|
Someone is asking about your soup!
|
|
|
|
RESUME SCENE
|
|
|
|
The bustle of the kitchen has STOPPED DEAD as Skinner
|
|
tastes the soup. His eyes betray a truth; the soup is
|
|
delicious. And he HATES that. He turns to Linguini, his
|
|
face DARK.
|
|
29.
|
|
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
What are you playing at?
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
(totally confused)
|
|
I, uhm, didn’t-- am I still fired?
|
|
|
|
COLETTE
|
|
You can’t fire him.
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
(wheels on her)
|
|
What--!?
|
|
|
|
COLETTE
|
|
LeClaire likes it. She made a point
|
|
of telling you so. If she writes a
|
|
review to that effect, and finds
|
|
out you fired the cook responsible
|
|
--
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
He’s a garbage boy --
|
|
|
|
COLETTE
|
|
-- who made something she liked.
|
|
How can we claim to represent the
|
|
name of Gusteau if we don’t uphold
|
|
his most cherished belief?
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
What belief is that, Mademoiselle
|
|
Tatou?
|
|
|
|
COLETTE
|
|
Anyone can cook.
|
|
|
|
|
|
34 INT. UNDER THE COLANDER 34
|
|
|
|
The Gusteau sprite NUDGES Remy.
|
|
|
|
RESUME SCENE
|
|
|
|
The other COOKS murmur their assent. The turn of the tide
|
|
isn’t lost on Skinner. His face softens into an icy smile.
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
30.
|
|
|
|
|
|
Perhaps I’ve been a bit harsh on
|
|
our new garbage boy. He has taken a
|
|
bold risk, and we should reward
|
|
that, as Chef Gusteau would have.
|
|
If he wishes to swim in dangerous
|
|
waters who are we to deny him?
|
|
|
|
|
|
35 INT. UNDER THE COLANDER 35
|
|
|
|
Remy’s totally absorbed in this conflict. A COUGH causes
|
|
Remy to looks up: the GUSTEAU SPRITE gestures at the
|
|
window.
|
|
|
|
GUSTEAU
|
|
You were escaping?
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
Oh. Yeah --
|
|
|
|
Remy resumes pushing toward the window.
|
|
|
|
BACK TO SCENE
|
|
|
|
Skinner turns to Colette, gives her a withering smile.
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
Since you have expressed such an
|
|
interest in his cooking career, you
|
|
should be responsible for it.
|
|
|
|
Colette’s face falls. Skinner turns to the other cooks.
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
Anyone else?
|
|
(they look away)
|
|
Then back to work--!
|
|
|
|
The cooks resume their work. Skinner wheels on Linguini.
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
You are either very lucky or very
|
|
Unlucky. You will make the soup
|
|
again, and this time I’ll be paying
|
|
attention. Very close attention.
|
|
|
|
Off to the side, REMY has almost made it to the window.
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
They think you might be a cook. But
|
|
you know what I think, Linguini? I
|
|
think you’re a sneaky, overreaching
|
|
little --
|
|
31.
|
|
|
|
|
|
(he SPIES REMY)
|
|
-- RAAAAT!!!
|
|
|
|
REMY RUNS. The OTHER COOKS come after him. Skinner SWINGS a
|
|
MOP at Remy, breaking dishes and blocking his escape.
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
Linguini! Get a something to trap
|
|
it in!!
|
|
|
|
Linguini CLAPS a jar over Remy. Seals it.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
What should I do now?
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
Kill it.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
Now?
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
No! Not in the kitchen, are you
|
|
mad?? Do you know what would happen
|
|
to us if anyone knew we had a rat
|
|
in our kitchen?
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
They’d close us down!! Our
|
|
reputation is hanging by a thread
|
|
as it is. Take it away from here,
|
|
far away. Kill it, dispose of it.
|
|
Go!
|
|
|
|
Linguini nods and quickly EXITS the kitchen’s back door.
|
|
|
|
|
|
36 EXT. ALLEY BEHIND GUSTEAU’S KITCHEN - CONTINUOUS - NIGHT 36
|
|
|
|
Linguini hops aboard a bicycle and peddles into the gloom,
|
|
carrying Remy in the jar with him.
|
|
|
|
|
|
37 EXT. ALONG THE SEINE - NIGHT 37
|
|
|
|
The waterfront, normally so beautiful, seems dark and
|
|
foreboding this night. Linguini slows his bicycle and pulls
|
|
up under a street lamp near a bridge underpass. He climbs
|
|
off the bicycle and prepares to drop the jar into the
|
|
water.
|
|
|
|
Remy is PETRIFIED. His heart racing, he presses his paws
|
|
against the glass, staring at Linguini with terrified eyes.
|
|
32.
|
|
|
|
|
|
Linguini HESITATES then PULLS BACK, shouting at Remy.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
Don’t look at me like that! You
|
|
aren’t the only one who’s trapped.
|
|
They expect me to cook it again!
|
|
(Remy looks up: HUH?)
|
|
I’m not ambitious, I wasn’t trying
|
|
to cook, I was just trying to stay
|
|
out of trouble. You’re the one who
|
|
was getting fancy with the spices!
|
|
What’d you throw in there? Oregano?
|
|
(Remy SHAKES HEAD: “NO”)
|
|
No? What, rosemary?
|
|
(Again, Remy shakes head)
|
|
That’s a spice, isn’t it? Rosemary?
|
|
(At this Remy NODS)
|
|
You didn’t put rosemary in there?
|
|
|
|
Remy shakes his head. Linguini SLUMPS down on the bank,
|
|
sets the Remy jar next to him.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
I need this job. I’ve lost so many.
|
|
I don’t know how to cook and now
|
|
I’m talking to a rat as if you
|
|
actually understand what I’m say--
|
|
(sudden realization)
|
|
--did you NOD?? You UNDERSTAND ME??
|
|
(Remy NODS)
|
|
So I’m not crazy. Wait a second,
|
|
wait a second. I can’t cook. Can I?
|
|
(Remy shakes his head)
|
|
But you can. Right?
|
|
(Remy thinks uncertainly)
|
|
Don’t be so modest, you’re a rat
|
|
for Pete’s sake. Whatever you did,
|
|
they liked it.
|
|
(lost in thought)
|
|
Yeah. This could work. Hey, they
|
|
liked the soup--
|
|
|
|
With an expansive gesture Linguini accidentally KNOCKS
|
|
REMY’S JAR INTO THE SEINE. Horrified, Linguini DIVES IN
|
|
after it.
|
|
|
|
JUMP CUT TO:
|
|
|
|
|
|
38 EXT. ALONG BANKS OF SEINE - MINUTES LATER 38
|
|
|
|
Linguini sits on a bench, soaking wet, the jar with Remy
|
|
successfully retrieved and sitting next to him.
|
|
33.
|
|
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
They liked the soup. You think you
|
|
could do it again?
|
|
(Remy NODS)
|
|
I’m gonna let you go. But we’re
|
|
together on this. Right?
|
|
(Remy NODS again)
|
|
Okay.
|
|
|
|
Linguini sets the jar down on its side and carefully OPENS
|
|
the lid. Remy looks up at him and TAKES OFF, escaping into
|
|
the darkness. CACKLING as he runs, Remy LOOKS BACK at --
|
|
|
|
REMY’S POV: PULLING AWAY FROM LINGUINI
|
|
|
|
-- who stands forlorn and alone under the bridge.
|
|
|
|
WITH REMY
|
|
|
|
He slows to a stop, moved by this pitiful sight.
|
|
|
|
WITH LINGUINI
|
|
|
|
He SIGHS, defeated. Turns sadly to his bicycle. Then a
|
|
SOUND: the CLICKING of tiny claws on cement. Linguini looks
|
|
up--
|
|
|
|
REMY, very cautiously, is coming toward him, back into the
|
|
light. Remy looks at Linguini who SMILES.
|
|
|
|
|
|
39 INT. LINGUINI’S FLAT - NIGHT 39
|
|
|
|
Darkness. we hear KEYS fumbling in a lock. Linguini KICKS
|
|
the warped door a few times, opening it enough to enter,
|
|
and wrestle his bicycle through. He turns on a light,
|
|
REVEALING a tiny, odd-shaped room; two doors in the wall;
|
|
one a bathroom, the other a closet, both tiny. One window,
|
|
a table with two chairs. Hotplate. A miniscule, ancient
|
|
refrigerator.
|
|
|
|
A ratty couch doubles as a bed, a portable black & white
|
|
t.v. rests precariously on one arm.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
This is it. It’s not much, but it’s
|
|
--
|
|
(he looks around)
|
|
-- not much.
|
|
(to Remy, shrugs)
|
|
Could be worse; there’s heat and
|
|
light and a couch with a TV. So,
|
|
y’know -- what’s mine is yours.
|
|
34.
|
|
|
|
|
|
Remy looks over the new digs. He likes them just fine.
|
|
|
|
LATER
|
|
|
|
Fast asleep on the couch, Linguini is bathed in the
|
|
flickering light from an old and very romantic FRENCH MOVIE
|
|
on TV. TWO LOVERS stand handsomely in the swirling steam of
|
|
a soon to depart locomotive, staring into each other’s eyes
|
|
--
|
|
|
|
HER (TV)
|
|
Are you-- is this a dream?
|
|
|
|
HIM (TV)
|
|
The best kind of dream. One we can
|
|
share.
|
|
|
|
Tucked in to an OVEN MITT near the window sill, REMY gazes
|
|
dreamily at the lights of Paris. The romantic MOVIE MUSIC
|
|
swells, underscoring his emotions.
|
|
|
|
Remy grins, slowly closes his eyes. Dreaming.
|
|
|
|
|
|
40 INT. LINGUINI’S FLAT - MORNING 40
|
|
|
|
Linguini AWAKENS with a start. He looks up at the oven mitt
|
|
--
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
Morning, little Chef. Rise and sh -
|
|
-
|
|
|
|
-- and suddenly realizes REMY IS GONE.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
Idiot! I knew this would happen! I
|
|
let a rat into my place and tell
|
|
him what’s mine is his?
|
|
|
|
Linguini yanks open the refrigerator door and looks inside.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
Eggs GONE! STUPID! He’s stolen food
|
|
and hit the road! What’d I expect?
|
|
That’s what I get for trusting a ra
|
|
--
|
|
|
|
As Linguini moves around the tiny alcove HE SEES REMY,
|
|
quite pleased with himself as he cooks omelettes on the
|
|
hotplate. Two places have been set at the tiny table.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
35.
|
|
|
|
|
|
Wh--? Hey. What -- is that for me?
|
|
|
|
Remy nods and deftly (but with considerable effort) sets
|
|
the large omelette onto Linguini’s plate. Linguini sits and
|
|
puts a forkful into his mouth.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
It’s good. What’d you put in this?
|
|
(Remy holds up basil
|
|
leaf)
|
|
Where’d you get that?
|
|
|
|
Remy moves to the window and points to the roof garden of a
|
|
nearby flat. Linguini looks down at the enterprising rat.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
Look. It’s delicious. But don’t
|
|
steal. I’ll buy some spices, okay?
|
|
|
|
Remy shrugs and turns to eat. Linguini glances at his
|
|
clock.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
Oh no. We’re gonna be late, and on
|
|
the first day!
|
|
|
|
Linguini SHOVES the rest of the eggs into his mouth and
|
|
grabs his coat. Famished, Remy opens wide, ready for his
|
|
first bite of food, when Linguini snatches him up--
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
Ca’mon, little Chef!
|
|
|
|
-- and runs out of the apartment.
|
|
|
|
|
|
41 INT. GUSTEAU’S KITCHEN - MORNING 41
|
|
|
|
The cooks are circled around Colette, listening with
|
|
interest as she reads a review aloud from the morning
|
|
paper.
|
|
|
|
COLETTE
|
|
“Though I, like many other critics,
|
|
had written off Gusteau’s as
|
|
irrelevant since the great Chef’s
|
|
death, the soup was a revelation, a
|
|
spicy yet subtle taste experience.”
|
|
|
|
Skinner has ENTERED, and is now stopped in his tracks.
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
(stunned)
|
|
36.
|
|
|
|
|
|
LeClaire?
|
|
|
|
COLETTE
|
|
Yes!
|
|
(resumes reading)
|
|
”Against all odds, Gusteau’s has
|
|
recaptured our attention. Only time
|
|
will tell if they deserve it.”
|
|
|
|
|
|
42 EXT. IN ALLEY OUTSIDE GUSTEAU’S 42
|
|
|
|
Linguini waits outside, Remy in palm, staring uncomfortably
|
|
at the kitchen entrance, working up the nerve to go inside.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
Well, uhm --
|
|
|
|
Aware he can’t enter the kitchen carrying a rat, Linguini
|
|
looks half heartedly for places to conceal Remy; under his
|
|
shirt, up his sleeves, in his sock rejecting each in turn.
|
|
|
|
Out of ideas, Linguini slowly opens the top of his pants.
|
|
Remy looks up at him, APPALLED.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
(desperate)
|
|
Look, I know it’s weird and stupid,
|
|
but neither of us can do this
|
|
alone. So we gotta do it together,
|
|
right? You with me??
|
|
|
|
Remy gives a reluctant NOD. Linguini glares at the kitchen
|
|
entrance, psyching himself up.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
So -- LET'S DO THIS THING!!
|
|
|
|
|
|
43 INT. KITCHEN - GUSTEAU’S 43
|
|
|
|
The back door SLAMS OPEN. All heads swing to a slightly
|
|
crazed LINGUINI standing in the doorway. He wilts a bit
|
|
with the attention, and attempts to cross inconspicuously
|
|
to his station, the hidden rat causing a strangely spastic
|
|
lurch.
|
|
|
|
The other COOKS watch with bewildered amusement.
|
|
|
|
Linguini arrives at his station and looks uneasily at the
|
|
new TOQUE resting there: his new toque. He swallows,
|
|
placing it on his head, and suddenly notices Skinner
|
|
standing there.
|
|
37.
|
|
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
Welcome to hell. Now, recreate the
|
|
soup. Take as long as you need, all
|
|
week if you must.
|
|
|
|
Skinner EXITS. Linguini looks at his station with dread, a
|
|
blocked writer facing a blank page.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
Soup.
|
|
|
|
|
|
44 INT. LINGUINI’S STATION - MINUTES LATER 44
|
|
|
|
Raw soup stock bubbles at a low boil on the stove. Linguini
|
|
stares at the variety carefully prepared of ingredients
|
|
herbs, spices, diced vegetables, etc that have been and
|
|
laid out at his station. He’s completely unsure of where to
|
|
start.
|
|
|
|
REMY peeks out from Linguini’s collar and examines the
|
|
scene. He scrambles underneath Linguini’s shirt and across
|
|
his chest, tickling him. Linguini LAUGHS.
|
|
|
|
Remy’s head pops out from Linguini’s SHIRT CUFF, sees
|
|
Linguini reaching for a SPICE TIN; the WRONG spice. Remy
|
|
signals Linguini to stop, but Linguini pays no attention,
|
|
so Remy gives Linguini’s HAND a NIP.
|
|
|
|
Linguini YELPS, dropping the entire spice tin INTO THE
|
|
SOUP. Appalled, Remy gives Linguini an admonishing bite.
|
|
|
|
Linguini YELPS and CURSES, SWATS Remy in retaliation. Remy
|
|
scurries to the other arm (GIGGLE) and gives Linguini
|
|
another nip (more YELPS & CURSINGS).
|
|
|
|
The OTHER COOKS marvel at the strangeness of the spastic,
|
|
giggling, yelping Linguini. Visibly panicked, the
|
|
giggling/yelping Linguini TURNS, lurching from his station
|
|
to the food safe, and closing himself inside.
|
|
|
|
|
|
45 INT. INSIDE FOOD VAULT - CONTINUOUS 45
|
|
|
|
Linguini RIPS his shirt open, exposing his chest and arms,
|
|
which are covered in angry red BITE MARKS.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
AAAAAAAAGGGGGGHHHHH!!!
|
|
(looks at Remy
|
|
accusingly)
|
|
AAAAAAAAGGGGGGHHHHH!!!
|
|
(gestures at bite marks)
|
|
38.
|
|
|
|
|
|
AAAAAAAAGGGGGGHHHHH!!!
|
|
|
|
Remy stares at the nearly hysterical Linguini.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
This is NOT gonna work, little
|
|
chef! I am gonna LOSE IT if we do
|
|
this anymore. We gotta figure out
|
|
something else. Something that
|
|
doesn’t involve any biting or
|
|
nipping or running up and down my
|
|
body with your little rat feet. The
|
|
biting; NO. Scampering; NO. No
|
|
scampering or scurrying.
|
|
Understand, little chef?
|
|
(beat)
|
|
Little chef?
|
|
|
|
Remy’s gaze has drifted away from Linguini, to the shelves
|
|
LOADED with premium food. Remy looks weak with longing.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
Oh, you’re hungry.
|
|
|
|
Guilty, Linguini breaks a chunk from a round of cheese and
|
|
offers it to Remy, who scarfs it down. Linguini, calmer
|
|
now, straightens his clothes as he thinks out loud.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
Okay, the way I see it; you know
|
|
how to cook. And I know how to
|
|
appear human. We just need to work
|
|
out a system so that I do what you
|
|
want in a way that doesn’t look
|
|
like I’m being controlled by a tiny
|
|
rat chef oh WOULD YOU LISTEN TO ME?
|
|
I’M INSANE I’M INSANE I’M INSIDE A
|
|
REFRIGERATOR TALKING TO A RAT ABOUT
|
|
GOURMET COOKING I WILL NEVER PULL
|
|
THIS OFF.
|
|
|
|
|
|
46 INT. KITCHEN - OUTSIDE FOOD VAULT 46
|
|
|
|
Passing the food vault Skinner hears a VOICE from within.
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
Linguini?
|
|
|
|
|
|
47 INT. INSIDE FOOD VAULT 47
|
|
39.
|
|
|
|
|
|
Remy, still eating, listens as Linguini pours his heart
|
|
out.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
-- we gotta communicate! I can’t be
|
|
checking for a yes or no head shake
|
|
from a rat th --
|
|
|
|
Suddenly the vault door JERKS OPEN. THREE THINGS HAPPEN
|
|
FAST:
|
|
|
|
1) Skinner sees a fleeting glimpse of LINGUINI WITH REMY.
|
|
|
|
2) Linguini HITS THE LIGHT SWITCH-- the room GOES DARK.
|
|
|
|
3) Skinner instantly FLICKS THE LIGHTS BACK ON to see
|
|
Linguini standing exactly as before. But Remy is GONE.
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
The rat! I saw it!
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
No, a rat?
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
(searching about
|
|
Linguini)
|
|
Yes, yes-- a rat! Right next to you
|
|
--
|
|
(stops, suspicious)
|
|
-- what ARE YOU DOING IN HERE???
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
I’m just familiarizing myself with
|
|
-- y’know, the vegetables and such.
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
Get out.
|
|
|
|
Linguini makes a hasty exit. Skinner calls out after him.
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
ONE CAN GET TOO FAMILIAR WITH
|
|
VEGETABLES YOU KNOW!
|
|
|
|
|
|
48 INT. KITCHEN - CONTINUOUS 48
|
|
|
|
Linguini speaks to Remy, who he’s hidden under his TOQUE--
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
That was close. You okay up there?
|
|
40.
|
|
|
|
|
|
49 INT. INSIDE LINGUINI’S TOQUE 49
|
|
|
|
Remy’s surroundings are visible through the thin fabric. He
|
|
looks up AND SEES they are about to COLLIDE with a WAITER
|
|
CARRYING A TRAY PILED WITH DISHES. Remy YANKS BACK
|
|
LINGUINI’S HAIR like horses REINS, CAUSING LINGUINI to jerk
|
|
backwards in an impossible limbo-arch, pivoting under the
|
|
tray of dishes and BACK UP AGAIN, miraculously averting
|
|
disaster.
|
|
|
|
Linguini blinks in amazement: what just happened? He ducks
|
|
into the BATHROOM.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI removes his toque, looks at Remy in the mirror.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
How did you do that??
|
|
|
|
Still grasping hanks of Linguini’s hair in his paws, Remy
|
|
SHRUGS. Linguini’s shoulders SHOOT UP to his ears.
|
|
Startled, Remy drops his arms; Linguini’s shoulders drop.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
Whooaah--!
|
|
|
|
A gleam comes into the rats’ eyes. He JERKS the left hank,
|
|
causing Linguini’s LEFT ARM to SHOOT UP IN THE AIR.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
(marveling)
|
|
Wow. That’s strangely
|
|
involuntaREEE-
|
|
|
|
Remy is yanking tufts of Linguini’s hair like a kid with a
|
|
new toy. Linguini jerks around like a helpless puppet.
|
|
|
|
Remy stops, looks at the panting Linguini in the mirror.
|
|
|
|
REMY (V.O.)
|
|
One look and I knew, each of us had
|
|
the same crazy idea.
|
|
|
|
|
|
50 INT. LINGUINI’S FLAT - NIGHT 50
|
|
|
|
MONTAGE: LEARNING TO COOK
|
|
|
|
Using hanks of Linguini’s hair to control Linguini’s
|
|
actions, Remy pilots Linguini(who is blindfolded to keep
|
|
him from cheating) through an increasingly complex series
|
|
of cooking tasks, everything from cutting vegetables to
|
|
flipping crepes.
|
|
41.
|
|
|
|
|
|
During this comic montage we see Remy learning precisely
|
|
how to pilot Linguini, and at the same time, Linguini is
|
|
learning how to surrender himself to being “piloted”.
|
|
|
|
By dawn, Linguini and Remy have meshed into one finely
|
|
honed cooking machine.
|
|
|
|
DISSOLVE TO:
|
|
|
|
|
|
51 INT. KITCHEN - NEXT DAY 51
|
|
|
|
Linguini stands off to the side, fretting as Skinner pulls
|
|
a ladle of soup from a Linguini’s pot and tastes it.
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
Congratulations. You were able to
|
|
repeat your accidental success. But
|
|
you will need to know more than
|
|
soup, if you are to survive in my
|
|
kitchen, boy. Colette --
|
|
|
|
Skinner gestures to COLETTE, who watches with a scowl.
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
-- will be responsible for teaching
|
|
you how we do things here.
|
|
|
|
Skinner grins and EXITS. Linguini crosses to Colette.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
(a little too smooth)
|
|
Listen, I just want you to know how
|
|
honored I am to be studying under a
|
|
--
|
|
|
|
Colette STABS a knife through Linguini’s shirtsleeve,
|
|
pinning it to the table. Her voice is low, intense.
|
|
|
|
COLETTE
|
|
No, you listen. I just want you to
|
|
know exactly who you are dealing
|
|
with. How many women do you see in
|
|
this kitchen?
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
Well, I hah -- um --
|
|
|
|
She brings a second knife down through Linguini’s sleeve --
|
|
|
|
COLETTE
|
|
Only me. Why do you think that is??
|
|
42.
|
|
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
(spooked, sputtering)
|
|
Well -- huh--! I-- hoo--
|
|
|
|
COLETTE
|
|
Because Haute Cuisine is an
|
|
antiquated hierarchy built upon
|
|
rules written by stupid old men,
|
|
rules designed to make it
|
|
impossible for women to enter this
|
|
world. But still I am here. How did
|
|
this happen?
|
|
|
|
Linguini burbles in a desperate attempt at nonchalance.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
Because-- you, ah-- hah--
|
|
|
|
Colette SLAMS a third knife through Linguini’s sleeve,
|
|
thoroughly pinning it. Linguini is truly frightened.
|
|
|
|
COLETTE
|
|
Because I’m the toughest cook in
|
|
this kitchen. I’ve worked too hard
|
|
for too long to get here, and I’m
|
|
not going to jeopardize it for some
|
|
garbage boy who got lucky. Got it??
|
|
|
|
Linguini NODS pathetically. Colette pulls the knife handles
|
|
out with a single JERK and Linguini topples to the floor.
|
|
|
|
Colette EXITS. Linguini peeks over the counter, dazzled.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
Wow --
|
|
|
|
|
|
52 INT. SKINNER’S OFFICE 52
|
|
|
|
Skinner watches as ad man FRANCOIS DUPUIS finishes pitching
|
|
his campaign for the latest GUSTEAU’S FROZEN FOOD product.
|
|
|
|
The trademark Chef Gusteau art has been re-painted; Gusteau
|
|
now sports a kimono, coolie hat, and chopsticks. Behind
|
|
this are similar campaigns for GUSTEAU’S FRENCH PIZZA and
|
|
GUSTEAU’S MICROWAVE BURRITOS. Skinner is captivated.
|
|
|
|
DUPUIS
|
|
“Easy to cook, easy to eat, Gusteau
|
|
makes Chinese food ‘Chine-Easy!’”.
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
Excellent work Francois, as usual.
|
|
43.
|
|
|
|
|
|
DUPUIS
|
|
It’s good, isn’t it?
|
|
|
|
Skinner stands, offering a handshake to signal the end of
|
|
the meeting. As Francois packs up his portfolio, preparing
|
|
to leave, Skinner straightens the photo of himself with
|
|
Gusteau that hangs on the wall.
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
I want you to work up something for
|
|
my latest frozen food concept:
|
|
“Gusteau’s Corn Puppies”. Like corn
|
|
dogs, only smaller, bite size!
|
|
|
|
DUPUIS
|
|
(starts sketching in pad)
|
|
What are corn dogs?
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
Cheap sausages dipped in batter and
|
|
deep fried. You know -- American.
|
|
Whip something up, maybe Gusteau in
|
|
overalls and Huckleberry Tom hat --
|
|
|
|
DUPUIS
|
|
(displaying his sketch)
|
|
Or as a giant ear of corn in doggie
|
|
makeup?
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
Yes, but with dignity.
|
|
|
|
Dupuis EXITS. Skinner moves to his desk and the stack of
|
|
UNOPENED MAIL there, and begins to shuffle through it;
|
|
bill, bill, bill and the PINK ENVELOPE given to him by
|
|
Linguini.
|
|
|
|
He opens the envelope and reads; his bored eyes growing
|
|
wider and wider with each line. He GASPS, seizing the
|
|
phone.
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
Get my lawyer!
|
|
|
|
|
|
53 INT. SKINNER’S OFFICE - AN HOUR LATER 53
|
|
|
|
Skinner’s lawyer TALON LABARTHE is reading GUSTEAU’S WILL.
|
|
|
|
TALON
|
|
44.
|
|
|
|
|
|
The will stipulates that, if after
|
|
a period of two years from the date
|
|
of death no heir appears, Gusteau’s
|
|
business interests, including the
|
|
restaurant and the rights to his
|
|
name and image will pass to his
|
|
Sous Chef. You.
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
I know what the will stipulates!
|
|
(brandishing letter)
|
|
What I want to know is if this
|
|
letter, if this boy, changes
|
|
anything!
|
|
|
|
Skinner raises the window blinds, revealing a view of the
|
|
kitchen and Linguini, who looks unusually awkward among the
|
|
practiced cooking staff. Talon looks from Linguini to a
|
|
framed photo of GUSTEAU.
|
|
|
|
TALON
|
|
There’s not much resemblance--
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
(drops blinds)
|
|
There’s NO resemblance at all! He’s
|
|
not Gusteau’s son! Gusteau had no
|
|
children! And what of the timing of
|
|
all this? The deadline in the will
|
|
expires in less than a month!
|
|
|
|
Talon drifts around the office, searching for something.
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
Suddenly some boy arrives with a
|
|
letter from his “recently deceased”
|
|
mother claiming Gusteau as his
|
|
father? Highly suspect!
|
|
|
|
Talon spies a TOQUE inside a DISPLAY CASE. He turns to
|
|
Skinner.
|
|
|
|
TALON
|
|
This is Gusteau’s?
|
|
(Skinner NODS)
|
|
May I?
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
Of course, of course.
|
|
|
|
Talon carefully opens the display case, removes GUSTEAU’S
|
|
TOQUE and begins to inspect it.
|
|
45.
|
|
|
|
|
|
TALON
|
|
But the boy does not know?
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
(brandishing the letter)
|
|
She claims she never told him OR
|
|
Gusteau! And asks that I not tell!
|
|
|
|
TALON
|
|
Why you? What does she want?
|
|
|
|
Talon spies something on the toque: a HAIR. He pulls a pair
|
|
of TWEEZERS from his coat, removes the hair, folding it
|
|
carefully inside a handkerchief, and pocketing it.
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
A job. For the boy.
|
|
|
|
TALON
|
|
Only a job?
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
Well, yes.
|
|
|
|
TALON
|
|
Then what are you worried about? If
|
|
he works here you’ll be able to
|
|
keep an eye on him, while I do a
|
|
little digging, find out how much
|
|
of this is real.
|
|
(getting his coat)
|
|
I’ll need you to collect some DNA
|
|
samples from the boy, hair maybe.
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
The whole thing is HIGHLY SUSPECT.
|
|
He KNOWS something!!
|
|
|
|
TALON
|
|
Relax. He’s a garbage boy. I think
|
|
you can handle him.
|
|
|
|
Talon exits. Skinner stands inert, spooked.
|
|
|
|
|
|
54 INT. KITCHEN 54
|
|
|
|
Linguini finishes dicing a red pepper. He sets down his
|
|
knife, carefully scoops up the small pile of dicings, walks
|
|
over to a giant pot and drops it in, returning to repeat
|
|
the procedure. Colette, who has watched this, interrupts--
|
|
|
|
COLETTE
|
|
46.
|
|
|
|
|
|
What are you doing?
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
I’m cutting. Vegetables. I’m
|
|
cutting the vegetables?
|
|
|
|
COLETTE
|
|
NO. You waste energy and time!
|
|
|
|
Colette slides a chair up to the end of Linguini’s prep
|
|
table and slams the pot down on its seat so that the top is
|
|
level with the table’s surface.
|
|
|
|
COLETTE
|
|
You think cooking is a cute job,
|
|
huh? Like mommy in the kitchen?
|
|
|
|
She snatches Linguini’s KNIFE from him with one hand,
|
|
several vegetables with the other. With frightening speed
|
|
she dices them; flicking each diced pile into the pot with
|
|
the knife; dice, flick, dice, flick.
|
|
|
|
COLETTE
|
|
Well mommy never had to face the
|
|
dinner rush when the orders come
|
|
flooding in and every dish is
|
|
different and none are simple and
|
|
all have different cooking times
|
|
but must arrive on the customers
|
|
table at exactly the same time, hot
|
|
and perfect. Every second counts --
|
|
|
|
In MOMENTS Colette has completed a ten-minute Linguini job.
|
|
|
|
COLETTE
|
|
-- and you CAN NOT BE MOMMY!!!!
|
|
|
|
TIME CUT:
|
|
|
|
|
|
55 INT. KITCHEN - ANOTHER DAY 55
|
|
|
|
Linguini is cooking. He takes a pan off the burner and sets
|
|
it to one side, which is already cluttered with utensils.
|
|
|
|
Colette sees the mess and is outraged.
|
|
|
|
COLETTE
|
|
What is this???
|
|
|
|
Linguini stammers. Colette quickly clears his station,
|
|
pitching it all into a sink full of dishwater.
|
|
47.
|
|
|
|
|
|
COLETTE
|
|
Keep your station clear. When the
|
|
meal rush comes what will happen??
|
|
Messy stations slow things down,
|
|
food doesn’t go, orders pile up,
|
|
disaster!! I’ll make this easy to
|
|
remember; keep your station clear
|
|
or I WILL KILL YOU.
|
|
|
|
TIME CUT:
|
|
|
|
Colette grabs Linguini by the arm and holds up his sleeves,
|
|
which are smeared with multi-colored STAINS.
|
|
|
|
COLETTE
|
|
Your sleeves look like you threw up
|
|
on them. Keep your hands and arms
|
|
in, close to the body like this --
|
|
(she demonstrates)
|
|
-- see? Always return to this
|
|
position. Cooks move fast; sharp
|
|
utensils, hot metal, keep your arms
|
|
in, you will minimize cuts and
|
|
burns and keep your sleeves clean.
|
|
Mark of a chef; messy apron, clean
|
|
sleeves.
|
|
|
|
TIME CUT:
|
|
|
|
|
|
56 INT. KITCHEN - ANOTHER DAY 56
|
|
|
|
Linguini and Colette shell peas. Colette’s manner is
|
|
easier, more collegial.
|
|
|
|
COLETTE
|
|
I know the Gusteau style cold. In
|
|
every dish Chef Gusteau always has
|
|
something unexpected. I will show
|
|
you, I memorized all his recipes --
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
(writing it down)
|
|
“Always do something unexpected”.
|
|
|
|
COLETTE
|
|
No. “Follow the recipe”.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
But you just said --
|
|
|
|
COLETTE
|
|
48.
|
|
|
|
|
|
It was his job to be unexpected. It
|
|
is our job to --
|
|
|
|
COLETTE & LINGUINI
|
|
-- follow the recipe.
|
|
|
|
TIME CUT:
|
|
|
|
|
|
57 INT. KITCHEN - ANOTHER DAY 57
|
|
|
|
Colette pulls a loaf from a basket of freshly baked bread
|
|
and shows it to Linguini.
|
|
|
|
COLETTE
|
|
How do you tell how good bread is
|
|
without tasting it? Not the smell,
|
|
not the look, but the sound of the
|
|
crust. Listen--
|
|
|
|
She holds the loaf to her ears, Linguini leans in to
|
|
listen.
|
|
|
|
|
|
58 INT. INSIDE LINGUINI’S TOQUE 58
|
|
|
|
Remy also LEANS IN to listen. Colette gives the bread a
|
|
SQUEEZE. The CRACKLE is seductive.
|
|
|
|
RESUME SCENE
|
|
|
|
She and Linguini SMILE at the pleasing CRUNCH.
|
|
|
|
COLETTE
|
|
-- a symphony of crackles. Only
|
|
great bread sounds this way.
|
|
|
|
TIME CUT:
|
|
|
|
|
|
59 INT. ANOTHER DAY - EARLY MORNING 59
|
|
|
|
Colette and Linguini have begun their prep. There is a new
|
|
relaxation between them.
|
|
|
|
COLETTE
|
|
The only way to get the best
|
|
produce is to have first pick of
|
|
the day, and there are only two
|
|
ways to get first pick; grow it
|
|
yourself or bribe a grower.
|
|
49.
|
|
|
|
|
|
She gestures to the back door. Outside a PRODUCE SELLER,
|
|
conversing amicably with La Rousse, sets down a crate of
|
|
gorgeous fruit and vegetables. La Rousse slips him money.
|
|
|
|
COLETTE
|
|
Voila! The best restaurants get
|
|
first pick.
|
|
|
|
TIME CUT:
|
|
|
|
Linguini and Colette cook side by side, their manner now as
|
|
easy and familiar as old friends.
|
|
|
|
COLETTE
|
|
People think Haute Cuisine is
|
|
snooty, so chefs must also be
|
|
snooty. But not so.
|
|
|
|
ON LALO, who bobs to radio music as he sautés, cooking with
|
|
a efficient, yet theatrical flourish.
|
|
|
|
COLETTE (V.O.)
|
|
Lalo there, ran away from home at
|
|
twelve, got hired by circus people
|
|
as an acrobat, got fired for
|
|
messing around with the
|
|
ringmaster's daughter.
|
|
|
|
CAMERA SWINGS to HORST. He glances about with shifty eyes.
|
|
|
|
COLETTE (V.O.)
|
|
Horst has done time.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI(V.O.)
|
|
What for?
|
|
|
|
COLETTE (V.O.)
|
|
No one knows for sure. He changes
|
|
the story every time you ask him.
|
|
|
|
JUMP CUTS: HORST explains various reasons for
|
|
incarceration.
|
|
|
|
HORST
|
|
I defrauded a major corporation.
|
|
I robbed the second largest bank in
|
|
France using only a ballpoint pen.
|
|
(CUT)
|
|
I created a hole in the ozone over
|
|
Avignon.
|
|
(CUT)
|
|
I killed a man with --
|
|
(he holds it up)
|
|
50.
|
|
|
|
|
|
-- this thumb.
|
|
|
|
CAMERA MOVES to POMPIDOU. He works dough with expert
|
|
precision.
|
|
|
|
COLETTE (V.O.)
|
|
Don’t ever play cards with
|
|
Pompidou. He’s been banned from
|
|
both Las Vegas and Monte Carlo.
|
|
|
|
CAMERA MOVES to LAROUSSE as he slips into the food safe.
|
|
|
|
COLETTE (V.O.)
|
|
La Rousse ran guns for the
|
|
resistance.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI (V.O.)
|
|
Which resistance?
|
|
|
|
COLETTE (V.O.)
|
|
He won’t say. Apparently they did
|
|
not win.
|
|
|
|
RESUME COLETTE & LINGUINI
|
|
|
|
COLETTE
|
|
So you see, we are artists.
|
|
Pirates. More than cooks are we.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
“We”?
|
|
|
|
COLETTE
|
|
Oui. You are one of us now, oui?.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
(surprised, touched)
|
|
Oui.
|
|
|
|
They exchange smiles and resume work. PAUSE.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
Thank you, by the way, for all the
|
|
advice about cooking.
|
|
|
|
COLETTE
|
|
Thank you, too.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
For what?
|
|
|
|
COLETTE
|
|
For taking it.
|
|
51.
|
|
|
|
|
|
60 INT. INSIDE SKINNER’S CAR - MOVING - NIGHT 60
|
|
|
|
Skinner listens to the radio. Suddenly he SITS UP--
|
|
|
|
HIS POV THROUGH WINDSHIELD:
|
|
|
|
Remy scampers across the alley to the kitchen entrance
|
|
behind GUSTEAU’S and into the hands of a kneeling Linguini.
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
The rat!!
|
|
|
|
RESUME SKINNER
|
|
|
|
He JAMS the brakes, throws the car into reverse. As
|
|
Linguini is brought back into view we see that REMY IS
|
|
GONE. Still kneeling, Linguini holds up a set of KEYS.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
(to Skinner, chuckles)
|
|
I just dropped my keys.
|
|
|
|
Skinner is BAFFLED.
|
|
|
|
|
|
61 INT. GUSTEAU’S - DINING AREA - NIGHT 61
|
|
|
|
There is noticeably more energy and fewer empty tables in
|
|
the dining room. Mustafa arrives at a table of FOOD SNOBS.
|
|
|
|
MUSTAFA
|
|
Have you decided?
|
|
|
|
FOOD SNOB #1
|
|
Well, the new soup is excellent but
|
|
--
|
|
|
|
FOOD SNOB #2
|
|
-- but we order it every time.
|
|
|
|
FOOD SNOB #3
|
|
What else do you have?
|
|
|
|
MUSTAFA
|
|
We have a very nice Foie Gras --
|
|
|
|
FOOD SNOB #1
|
|
(impatient)
|
|
Yes, the old standby, you used to
|
|
be famous for it. What does the
|
|
Chef have that’s new?
|
|
52.
|
|
|
|
|
|
Mustafa stands there, slack-jawed and blinking.
|
|
|
|
|
|
62 INT. KITCHEN 62
|
|
|
|
Mustafa crashes through the swinging doors in a panic.
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
This is simple. Just pull out an
|
|
old Gusteau recipe, something we
|
|
haven’t made in a while and --
|
|
|
|
MUSTAFA
|
|
They know about the old stuff. They
|
|
like Linguini’s soup --
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
Linguini? They are asking for food
|
|
from LINGUINI?
|
|
|
|
LALO
|
|
A lot of customers like the soup.
|
|
That’s all we were saying.
|
|
|
|
POMPIDOU
|
|
Were we saying that?
|
|
|
|
An IDEA comes to Skinner. Dark pleasure blooms on his face.
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
Very well. If it’s Linguini they
|
|
want --
|
|
|
|
He pulls Horst close and speaks to him quietly.
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
-- tell them “Chef” Linguini has
|
|
prepared something special for
|
|
them, something definitely “off-
|
|
menu”. Oh, and don’t forget to
|
|
stress its “Linguini-ness”.
|
|
|
|
HORST
|
|
Oui, Chef.
|
|
|
|
Skinner turns to Linguini, a big shark-smile on his face.
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
Now is your chance to try something
|
|
worthy of your talent, Linguini. A
|
|
forgotten favorite of the Chef’s:
|
|
“Sweetbread a la Gusteau”! Colette
|
|
will help you!
|
|
53.
|
|
|
|
|
|
COLETTE
|
|
Oui, Chef.
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
Now hurry up. Our diners are
|
|
hungry!
|
|
|
|
Skinner turns to go to his office, a worried La Rousse
|
|
rushes up to him, speaking in a low, concerned voice.
|
|
|
|
LA ROUSSE
|
|
Are you sure? That recipe was a
|
|
disaster. Gusteau himself said so.
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
Just the sort of challenge a
|
|
budding chef needs.
|
|
|
|
Skinner disappears inside his office, humming to himself.
|
|
|
|
|
|
63 INT. KITCHEN - WITH COLETTE & LINGUINI 63
|
|
|
|
Linguini looking over Colette’s shoulder as she stares at
|
|
an old, yellowing recipe card, sizing up it’s ingredients.
|
|
|
|
COLETTE
|
|
Sweetbread a la Gusteau. Sweetbread
|
|
cooked in a salt crust with
|
|
cuttlefish tentacles. Drizzled with
|
|
--snail porridge --
|
|
(with increasing
|
|
distaste)
|
|
Douglas fir puree, beetroot mousse
|
|
and pollen, dried white fungus and
|
|
dipped in anchovy liquorice sauce.
|
|
Huh.
|
|
|
|
Sounds awful. Colette shrugs it off and turns to Linguini.
|
|
|
|
COLETTE
|
|
I don’t know this recipe. But it is
|
|
Gusteau, so--
|
|
(calling out)
|
|
Lalo! We have some veal stomach
|
|
soaking, yes??
|
|
|
|
LALO (O.S.)
|
|
Yes, the veal stomach, I get that.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
Uh-- veal stomach?
|
|
54.
|
|
|
|
|
|
64 INT. INSIDE LINGUINI’S TOQUE - MINUTES LATER 64
|
|
|
|
Remy pilots Linguini’s hand to lift the small pot of snail
|
|
porridge off the burner and up to Linguini’s toque for an
|
|
obligatory sniff. Remy looks at the porridge, then at the
|
|
rack of fresh spices. Suddenly Remy pilots Linguini to go
|
|
for the SPICES, lifting them rapidly one by one up the
|
|
toque to SNIFF. Remy selects one that smells right and
|
|
dumps it in the pot.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI suddenly LEANS FORWARD, tilting his toque over the
|
|
fragrant STEAM from the simmering pot.
|
|
|
|
|
|
65 INT. INSIDE LINGUINI’S TOQUE 65
|
|
|
|
Remy takes a WHIFF, likes what he smells. Inspired, he
|
|
pilots Linguini out into the kitchen.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI is alarmed by his sudden ramble, completely unsure
|
|
of where he’s going, what he’s looking for.
|
|
|
|
|
|
66 INT. UNDER THE TOQUE 66
|
|
|
|
Remy maneuvers Linguini spasmodically past the other cooks
|
|
stations, wildly sniffing around for the next ingredient, a
|
|
composer hunting for the next note in a new symphony. He
|
|
catches a pleasing scent in Lalo’s station.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI SNATCHES some SHALLOTS from Lalo, who looks up in
|
|
SHOCK, but Linguini is already gone, racing back to his
|
|
station to add the new ingredients to a heating pan.
|
|
|
|
Linguini JERKS forward, tilting his toque over the pan,
|
|
then PEELS OUT of his station, once again on the move.
|
|
|
|
|
|
67 INT. KITCHEN - SAME TIME 67
|
|
|
|
Linguini ZIPS about snatching ingredients from the other
|
|
cooks stations, a Porche apologizing for its driver.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
(ad-lib to cooks)
|
|
Pardon me, just need to borrow this
|
|
real quick, sorry, apparently I
|
|
need this, I’ll be right back --
|
|
|
|
To the others, Linguini looks deranged; a man who’s clearly
|
|
lost control of both his body and his faculties.
|
|
55.
|
|
|
|
|
|
Linguini careens back into his station and DUMPS the
|
|
ingredients into his pan, startling Colette.
|
|
|
|
COLETTE
|
|
What are you doing? We are supposed
|
|
to be preparing the Gusteau recipe.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
(stirring, flipping pan)
|
|
I’m, uh, this is the recipe--
|
|
|
|
COLETTE
|
|
The recipe doesn’t call for white
|
|
truffle oil! What else have you--
|
|
|
|
COLETTE
|
|
(she looks in his pan)
|
|
You are improvising?? This is no
|
|
time to experiment, the customers
|
|
are waiting!
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
You’re right --
|
|
(to REMY, nudging toque)
|
|
-- I should listen to you!
|
|
|
|
Linguini suddenly SLAPS his own face, then LEANS his toque
|
|
over the Sweetbread.
|
|
|
|
Both Colette and Linguini are working quickly now, but on
|
|
separate dishes, giving the appearance of a competition.
|
|
|
|
HORST
|
|
The special??
|
|
|
|
COLETTE
|
|
Come get it!
|
|
|
|
|
|
68 INT. UNDER THE TOQUE 68
|
|
|
|
Remy watches anxiously as Colette sets the plate at the
|
|
pass to be picked up, a hank of hair in each paw, waiting
|
|
for an opening. Colette glances at the recipe.
|
|
|
|
COLETTE
|
|
Oh-- I forgot to add the liquorice!
|
|
|
|
She rushes back to get it. Remy sees his chance. Linguini
|
|
finds himself grabbing his pan and hurtling toward Colette.
|
|
|
|
|
|
69 INT. AT THE PASS 69
|
|
56.
|
|
|
|
|
|
Colette is about to add the liquorice sauce when Linguini
|
|
swoops in and BLOCKS HER HAND. Colette is STUNNED. Her eyes
|
|
FLASH at Linguini, who looks petrified, his left hand holds
|
|
his pan of saute, which trembles over the Sweetbread.
|
|
|
|
COLETTE
|
|
Don’t -- you -- dare.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
I’m not, I’m not, I’m--
|
|
|
|
Linguini dumps his saute over Colette’s dish the moment
|
|
before it is swept away by the waiter Mustafa.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
-- sorry.
|
|
|
|
Skinner enters, smiling as he walks up to Horst.
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
Is Linguini’s dish done yet?
|
|
|
|
HORST
|
|
Ya. It’s as bad as we remember.
|
|
Just went out.
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
(serene)
|
|
Did you taste it?
|
|
|
|
HORST
|
|
Of course before he changed it.
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
Good- WHAT? How could he change it?
|
|
|
|
HORST
|
|
He changed it as it was going out
|
|
the door!
|
|
|
|
Skinner starts toward the door to the dining room, just as
|
|
MUSTAFA busts through it, excited.
|
|
|
|
MUSTAFA
|
|
They love it! Other diners are
|
|
already asking about it, about
|
|
Linguini. I have seven more orders!
|
|
|
|
Colette is nonplussed. Skinner FLINCHES, then forces a
|
|
smile.
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
That’s wonderful.
|
|
57.
|
|
|
|
|
|
70 INT. INSIDE LINGUINI’S TOQUE 70
|
|
|
|
Remy slaps his paws together, relishing the night ahead.
|
|
|
|
MONTAGE
|
|
|
|
Crosscut between the dining room and the kitchen: orders
|
|
pile up as word of the “special” spreads between diners.
|
|
Remy pilots Linguini, preparing plate after plate of their
|
|
hit.
|
|
|
|
|
|
71 INT. KITCHEN - LATER 71
|
|
|
|
The dinner rush is over. The cooks congratulate their new
|
|
comrade Linguini, toasting him glasses of table wine.
|
|
|
|
Skinner watches from across the kitchen, STARING at the boy
|
|
with a mixture of confusion, envy and resentment. As
|
|
Linguini pass in front of a light Skinner SEES IT: a
|
|
strange shadow within Linguini’s toque the SILHOUETTE OF A
|
|
RAT. Skinner’s EYES going WIDE.
|
|
|
|
|
|
72 INT. BACK ENTRANCE - GUSTEAU’S 72
|
|
|
|
After a quick look around to make sure no one’s watching,
|
|
Linguini removes his toque and lets Remy out.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
Take a break little Chef, get some
|
|
air. We really did it tonight.
|
|
|
|
Linguini unfolds a napkin, revealing a miniature picnic;
|
|
fruit, bread, cheeses. Remy pooped but exhilarated beams at
|
|
Linguini, who raises his glass in a salute to the rat.
|
|
|
|
Linguini smiles and turns back inside.
|
|
|
|
|
|
73 INT. KITCHEN - CONTINUOUS 73
|
|
|
|
We follow Linguini as he crosses the kitchen, humming
|
|
happily to himself. PANNING INTO FRAME is SKINNER; perched
|
|
high atop a tray rack, waiting like a cat ready to pounce.
|
|
|
|
He SNATCHES the toque from Linguini’s head and gapes in
|
|
confusion when he sees nothing on top of the boy’s head. He
|
|
looks at Linguini and SMILES.
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
(dangling the toque)
|
|
Got your toque!
|
|
58.
|
|
|
|
|
|
Skinner hops to the ground, fluffing the toque with his
|
|
hand before handing it back to the mystified Linguini.
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
Seriously now, I’d love to have a
|
|
little talk with you, Linguini in
|
|
my office.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
Am I in trouble?
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
Trouble? Noo, a little wine, a
|
|
friendly chat. Just us cooks.
|
|
|
|
Colette watches Skinner steer Linguini into his office.
|
|
|
|
HORST
|
|
(to Colette, re:
|
|
Linguini)
|
|
The Plongeur won’t be coming to you
|
|
for advice anymore, eh Colette?
|
|
(nods to Skinner’s
|
|
office)
|
|
He’s gotten all he needs.
|
|
|
|
He exits chuckling. Colette slowly turns away, stung.
|
|
|
|
|
|
74 INT. INSIDE SKINNER’S OFFICE 74
|
|
|
|
Skinner settles in behind the massive desk that was
|
|
formerly Gusteau’s. Linguini sits uneasily at a chair
|
|
facing him, still holding his little glass of wine.
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
Toasting your success, eh Linguini?
|
|
Good for you.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
I just took it to be polite, they
|
|
were being so nice to me, I don’t
|
|
really drink, you know --
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
Of course you don’t. I wouldn’t
|
|
either if I was drinking that --
|
|
|
|
Skinner plucks the glass from Linguini’s hand, pours it
|
|
into a wastebasket, and offers up a newly opened bottle of
|
|
wine.
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
59.
|
|
|
|
|
|
-- but you would have to be an
|
|
idiot of elephantine proportions
|
|
not to appreciate this ‘61 Chateau
|
|
Latour. And you, M’sieur Linguini,
|
|
are no idiot.
|
|
(raising his glass)
|
|
Let us toast your non-idiocy! A
|
|
votre sante!
|
|
|
|
They clink and DRINK.
|
|
|
|
|
|
75 INT. OUTSIDE KITCHEN - BACK ENTRANCE - GUSTEAU’S 75
|
|
|
|
Remy munches contentedly and stares at the starry sky,
|
|
loving his bread, his cheese, his life. He breaks the top
|
|
off a grape and holding the stem like a wine glass, slowly
|
|
sips it into a raisin.
|
|
|
|
Something STIRS behind the trash cans. Remy FREEZES,
|
|
suddenly alert. Some kind of CREATURE is eating in the
|
|
shadows. Remy grabs the cheese knife and timidly goes to
|
|
investigate.
|
|
|
|
The creature LOOKS UP, its glowing eyes fix on Remy. Remy
|
|
GULPS, raises the knife. The creature LEAPS into the light-
|
|
-
|
|
|
|
EMILE
|
|
REMY!
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
Emile--??
|
|
|
|
They rush to each other, hugging and laughing.
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
And what are you eating??
|
|
|
|
Emile stares at Remy, chewing. He looks down, pondering the
|
|
unrecognizable wad in his hands for a long beat. He FROWNS.
|
|
|
|
EMILE
|
|
I don’t really know. I think it was
|
|
some sort of wrapper once.
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
What--? No.
|
|
|
|
Remy grabs the wad and throws it away with a flourish.
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
60.
|
|
|
|
|
|
You’re in Paris now, baby. My town.
|
|
No brother of mine eats rejecta-
|
|
menta in my town!
|
|
|
|
Remy turns on his heel and marches back into the kitchen.
|
|
|
|
|
|
76 INT. KITCHEN - MOMENTS LATER 76
|
|
|
|
Remy climbs to the pull handle on the FOOD SAFE DOOR and
|
|
hesitates there. LAUGHTER emanates from inside of Skinner’s
|
|
office. Remy leaps to the handle and with considerable
|
|
effort pushes it open, UNLOCKING the massive door. GUSTEAU
|
|
appears.
|
|
|
|
GUSTEAU SPRITE
|
|
Remy, you are stealing? You told
|
|
Linguini he could trust you.
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
And he can. It’s for my brother.
|
|
|
|
GUSTEAU SPRITE
|
|
The boy could lose his job.
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
Which means I would, too. It’s
|
|
under control, okay?
|
|
|
|
Remy shoves past the Gusteau spite and into the safe. The
|
|
sprite VANISHES.
|
|
|
|
|
|
77 INT. INSIDE SKINNER’S OFFICE - SAME TIME 77
|
|
|
|
Linguini sits back in his chair, looking a bit tipsy.
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
More wine?
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
I shouldn’t. But okay.
|
|
|
|
He offers his glass to Skinner, who refills it generously.
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
So where did you train, Linguini?
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
(chuckles, drinking)
|
|
Train? Alright --
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
61.
|
|
|
|
|
|
Surely you don’t expect me to
|
|
believe this is your first time
|
|
cooking?
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
It’s not.
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
I KNEW IT!
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
It’s my --
|
|
(stops, counts on
|
|
fingers)
|
|
-- second, third, four -- fifth
|
|
time. Monday was my first time.
|
|
(Skinner wilts)
|
|
But I’ve taken out the garbage lots
|
|
of times before this, that’s why I
|
|
--
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
(cutting him off,
|
|
pouring)
|
|
Yes yes yes. Have some more wine.
|
|
Tell me about your interests. Do
|
|
you like animals?
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
What--? Animals? What kind?
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
Oh, the usual. Dogs, cats, horses,
|
|
guinea pigs --
|
|
(pointed)
|
|
-- rats.
|
|
|
|
|
|
78 INT. BACK ENTRANCE - GUSTEAU’S - MINUTES LATER 78
|
|
|
|
Remy carries a small bundle of gourmet foodstuffs from the
|
|
kitchen, only to find Emile again munching on garbage.
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
I brought you something to-- AGH!!
|
|
No no NO! Spit that out right now!
|
|
(Emile does, shamed)
|
|
I have GOT to teach you about food!
|
|
Close your eyes.
|
|
|
|
As Emile closes his eyes, his SURROUNDINGS FADE TO BLACK.
|
|
Remy delicately holds a hunk of cheese under Emile’s nose--
|
|
62.
|
|
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
Now take a bite of thi--
|
|
|
|
Emile INHALES it. Horrified, Remy scolds him like a bad
|
|
pet.
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
-- NO NO NO! Don’t just hork it
|
|
down!
|
|
|
|
EMILE
|
|
Too late.
|
|
|
|
Annoyed, Remy hands him another piece of cheese. Emile eats
|
|
it, this time more carefully.
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
Chew it slowly, think only about
|
|
the taste. See?
|
|
|
|
A vague, grayish BLOB half-forms above his head. It MOVES
|
|
to undefined MUSIC as Emile struggles to experience the
|
|
food.
|
|
|
|
EMILE
|
|
Not really.
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
Creamy, salty sweet. An oaky
|
|
nuttiness? You detect that?
|
|
|
|
Emile opens his eyes (surroundings reappear), looks at
|
|
Remy.
|
|
|
|
EMILE
|
|
Oh, I’m detecting nuttiness.
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
Close your eyes. Now taste this.
|
|
(gives him a strawberry)
|
|
Whole different thing, right?
|
|
Sweet, crisp, slight tang on the
|
|
finish?
|
|
|
|
The BLOB reappears, but this time with a hint of color.
|
|
|
|
EMILE
|
|
Okay.
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
Now try them together. Uh-huh. See?
|
|
63.
|
|
|
|
|
|
Emile eats both together and chews, concentrating. Slowly
|
|
the weak COLORS become bolder and more complimentary. They
|
|
begin to dance and intermingle as a little MELODY takes
|
|
shape.
|
|
|
|
EMILE
|
|
Okay, I think I’m getting a little
|
|
something there. It might be the
|
|
nuttiness. Could be the tang.
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
That’s it! Now imagine every great
|
|
taste in the world being combined
|
|
into infinite combinations, tastes
|
|
that no one has tried yet!!
|
|
Discoveries to be made!
|
|
|
|
EMILE
|
|
I think -- you lost me again.
|
|
|
|
Emile opens his eyes. The SHAPES and SOUND FADE AWAY.
|
|
Sensing Remy’s disappointment, Emile reassures him.
|
|
|
|
EMILE
|
|
But that was interesting. Most
|
|
interesting garbage I ever -- HEY!
|
|
What are we doing? Dad doesn’t know
|
|
you’re alive. We’ve gotta go to the
|
|
colony!! Everyone will be thrilled!
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
Yeah, but, uh, thing is, I kinda
|
|
have to -- uh --
|
|
|
|
Remy gestures vaguely at the kitchen. Emile frowns.
|
|
|
|
EMILE
|
|
What? What do you “hafta” more than
|
|
family? What’s more important?
|
|
|
|
He glares furiously at Remy, whose resolve starts to
|
|
crumble.
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
Well, it wouldn’t hurt to visit.
|
|
|
|
|
|
79 INT. INSIDE SKINNER’S OFFICE - STILL LATER 79
|
|
|
|
A few EMPTY BOTTLES of wine litter Skinner’s desk. Linguini
|
|
is BOMBED, but Skinner’s increasingly desperate inquisition
|
|
is getting nowhere.
|
|
64.
|
|
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
I KNOW you know something about
|
|
RATS! You know you do!!
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
You know who know do whacka do.
|
|
Ratta tatta- hey! Why do they call
|
|
it that?
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
What?!
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
Ratatouille. There’s a dish called
|
|
that, it’s like a stew, right? Why
|
|
do they call it that? If you’re
|
|
gonna name a food you should give
|
|
it a name that sounds delicious.
|
|
Ratatouille doesn’t sound
|
|
delicious. It sounds like rat. And
|
|
patooty. Rat patooty! Which does
|
|
NOT sound delicious.
|
|
|
|
Linguini drinks, finds his glass empty. He smiles, offering
|
|
his glass for Skinner to refill.
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
(scowling)
|
|
Regrettably --
|
|
|
|
He drops the empty bottle into the trash with a loud THUNK.
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
-- we are all out of wine.
|
|
|
|
|
|
80 INT. INSIDE SEWER - RAT COMMONS - A LITTLE LATER 80
|
|
|
|
Several channels converge into a wide, open area as dreary
|
|
and uninviting as any sewer, save for a flotilla of tiny
|
|
BOATS illuminated by a scattering of multi-colored lanterns
|
|
that answer the gloom with magic.
|
|
|
|
Holding their clasped paws up victoriously, Django turns
|
|
from Remy to face the assembled crowd of rats.
|
|
|
|
DJANGO
|
|
MY SON -- HAS RETURNED!
|
|
|
|
An enormous CHEER erupts. Emile joins Django and Remy as
|
|
the clan crowds around them. Remy’s joy is clouded with
|
|
doubt; what about his new life?
|
|
65.
|
|
|
|
|
|
81 INT. RAT ENCAMPMENT - LATER 81
|
|
|
|
A PARTY is in full swing. The entire rat clan has come out
|
|
to bop to boisterous MUSIC played by a jazzy RAT BAND,
|
|
kicking down the jams in a unique gypsy/jitterbug dance
|
|
style that takes full advantage of their tails and all four
|
|
legs.
|
|
|
|
Joined by his sons, Django sits at a prime table. A WAITER
|
|
RAT quickly serves a round of drinks in well-worn thimbles
|
|
between them. Emile and Django suck theirs down. Remy takes
|
|
a discreet whiff and sets it aside.
|
|
|
|
DJANGO
|
|
And finding someone to replace you
|
|
for poison checker has been a
|
|
disaster. Nothing’s been poisoned,
|
|
thank God, but it hasn’t been easy.
|
|
You didn’t make it easy.
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
I know. I am sorry, Dad.
|
|
|
|
DJANGO
|
|
Well, the important thing is that
|
|
you’re home.
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
Yeah -- well, uh, about that --
|
|
|
|
DJANGO
|
|
You look thin. Why is that? A
|
|
shortage of food or a surplus of
|
|
snobbery?
|
|
|
|
Emile joins in as Django cracks up at his own joke.
|
|
|
|
DJANGO
|
|
It’s tough out there in the big
|
|
world all alone, isn’t it?
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
Sure but, it’s not like I’m a kid
|
|
anymore.
|
|
|
|
A well-wisher drops by to say hello to Django. Remy takes
|
|
advantage of the distraction to quickly deliver the bad
|
|
news.
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
I can take care of myself. I’ve
|
|
found a nice spot not far away, so
|
|
I’ll be able to visit often.
|
|
66.
|
|
|
|
|
|
DJANGO
|
|
(resuming conversation)
|
|
Nothing like a cold splash of
|
|
reality to make you --
|
|
(sudden realization)
|
|
-- “visit”?
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
I will, I promise. Often.
|
|
|
|
DJANGO
|
|
You’re not staying?
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
It’s not a big deal, Dad.
|
|
(gently)
|
|
You didn’t think I was going to
|
|
stay forever, did you? Eventually a
|
|
bird’s gotta leave the nest.
|
|
|
|
DJANGO
|
|
We’re not birds, we’re rats. We
|
|
don’t leave nests, we make them
|
|
bigger.
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
Maybe I’m different kind of rat.
|
|
|
|
DJANGO
|
|
Maybe you’re not a rat at all.
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
Maybe that’s a good thing.
|
|
|
|
EMILE
|
|
(trying to break tension)
|
|
Hey, the band’s really on tonight!
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
Rats! All we do is take, Dad. I’m
|
|
tired of taking. I want to make
|
|
things! I want to add something to
|
|
this world.
|
|
|
|
DJANGO
|
|
You’re talking like a human.
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
Who are not as bad as you say.
|
|
|
|
DJANGO
|
|
Oh yeah?
|
|
67.
|
|
|
|
|
|
EMILE
|
|
Oh man --
|
|
|
|
DJANGO
|
|
What makes you so sure?
|
|
|
|
Remy hesitates for a beat, suddenly careful.
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
I’ve uh, been able to, uh, observe
|
|
them at a close-ish sort of range.
|
|
|
|
DJANGO
|
|
Yeah? How close?
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
Close enough. And they’re, y’know,
|
|
not so bad. As you say. They are.
|
|
|
|
Django GLARES at Remy, scrutinizing him.
|
|
|
|
DJANGO
|
|
Come with me, I got something I
|
|
want you to see.
|
|
|
|
He moves from the table, dropping to all fours and heading
|
|
off. Reluctantly, Remy does likewise, leaving Emile alone.
|
|
|
|
EMILE
|
|
You know, I think I’ll stay here.
|
|
|
|
|
|
82 INT. KITCHEN - GUSTEAU’S RESTAURANT - SAME TIME 82
|
|
|
|
The sound of raindrops patter against the skylight.
|
|
Skinner, bundled up in a well-tailored overcoat, throws a
|
|
scarf around his neck. Linguini tipsily hands him his
|
|
beret.
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
Make sure the floors and counter-
|
|
tops are clean before you lock up.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
You want me to stay and clean?
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
Is that a problem?
|
|
|
|
Linguini slumps and drunkenly shakes his head “no”.
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
Good boy. See you tomorrow.
|
|
68.
|
|
|
|
|
|
Skinner exits, humming. Linguini watches him go with weary
|
|
eyes. He turns to face the messy kitchen and wilts.
|
|
|
|
|
|
83 EXT. PARIS STREET - NIGHT 83
|
|
|
|
It’s raining harder now. Django and Remy arrive at a drain
|
|
opening, through which can be glimpsed the rough
|
|
cobblestones of a city street.
|
|
|
|
DJANGO
|
|
We’re here.
|
|
|
|
Django scrambles out the curb-side drain and turns to face
|
|
the storefront behind them. Remy sits next to him and looks
|
|
up, following his father’s gaze. His jaw drops in horror.
|
|
|
|
Displayed in the window of the small shop are a variety of
|
|
nasty looking metal traps, RAT TRAPS to be precise, and
|
|
along side of those hang row after row of DEAD RATS.
|
|
|
|
DJANGO
|
|
Take a good, long look, Remy. This
|
|
is what happens when a rat gets a
|
|
little too comfortable around
|
|
humans.
|
|
|
|
Remy looks away. Django’s tone is tender, but firm.
|
|
|
|
DJANGO
|
|
The world we live in belongs to the
|
|
enemy. We must live carefully. We
|
|
look out for our own kind, Remy.
|
|
When all is said and done, we’re
|
|
all we’ve got.
|
|
|
|
His point made, Django turns to go. Remy stares up at the
|
|
horrible window, then softly says--
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
No.
|
|
|
|
DJANGO
|
|
(stops in his tracks)
|
|
What?
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
No, Dad. I don’t believe it. You’re
|
|
telling me that the future is --
|
|
can ONLY be --
|
|
(points at window)
|
|
-- more of this?
|
|
69.
|
|
|
|
|
|
DJANGO
|
|
This is the way things are. You
|
|
can’t change nature.
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
Change IS nature, Dad. The part
|
|
that we can influence. And it
|
|
starts when we decide.
|
|
|
|
With that, Remy turns and walking upright on two legs
|
|
starts back to Gusteau’s. Django calls after him.
|
|
|
|
DJANGO
|
|
Where you goin’?
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
With luck forward.
|
|
|
|
|
|
84 EXT. OUTSIDE BACK KITCHEN ENTRANCE - GUSTEAU’S - MORNING 84
|
|
|
|
The storm has passed and the sky is cloudless and clear. As
|
|
a weary Remy exits the sewer, the fresh air hits his
|
|
nostrils and he draws it in like a sweet memory.
|
|
|
|
He exhales, renewed and happy to be back in his brave new
|
|
world. Forgetting himself, he trots for the kitchen
|
|
entrance on two legs, throwing a reckless wave at a passing
|
|
CYCLIST.
|
|
|
|
The cyclist DOUBLE-TAKES, craning his neck to look at the
|
|
bizarre sight and collides with a parked car.
|
|
|
|
|
|
85 INT. KITCHEN - GUSTEAU’S RESTAURANT 85
|
|
|
|
Remy enters and looks around. No one has arrived yet. Remy
|
|
steps on to the counter top and surveys the kitchen,
|
|
savoring the day ahead. And then he hears the sound.
|
|
SNORING.
|
|
|
|
He TAKES COVER and peers out. No one is there, but the
|
|
SNORING persists. He peers cautiously over the edge--
|
|
|
|
REMY’S POV
|
|
|
|
-- as Remy walks forward, REVEALING:
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI curled up on the floor and slumbering like a
|
|
vagrant. Remy looks at the clock, realizing with horror
|
|
that the others are about to arrive.
|
|
70.
|
|
|
|
|
|
Remy jumps onto Linguini’s head like a rough rider on a
|
|
fallen horse and expertly TUGGING hanks of Linguini’s hair,
|
|
manages to get the boy up on his feet.
|
|
|
|
But Linguini remains FAST ASLEEP. Remy lifts one of
|
|
Linguini’s heavy EYELIDS and waves frantically at a staring
|
|
eye but Linguini is OUT COLD.
|
|
|
|
The SOUND of a motorcycle arriving at the rear entrance
|
|
causes Remy to looks around in desperation. He spies a pair
|
|
of SUNGLASSES near the cook’s lockers.
|
|
|
|
Colette ENTERS, unpleasantly surprised to find LINGUINI
|
|
already at work. She crosses to their station and starts
|
|
prep. Remy has hidden Linguini’s shut eyes behind
|
|
sunglasses, unintentionally giving him the air of a smug
|
|
ROCK STAR.
|
|
|
|
Though Linguini remains fast ASLEEP, Remy pulls his hair to
|
|
keep the boy’s limbs working somewhat convincingly.
|
|
|
|
COLETTE
|
|
(cool, formal)
|
|
Good morning.
|
|
|
|
INTERCUT:
|
|
|
|
UNDER LINGUINI’S TOQUE/ COLETTE & LINGUINI
|
|
|
|
Remy pulls hair, nervously puppeting the sleeping Linguini.
|
|
|
|
How can he make Linguini answer? He PULLS a side hair hank
|
|
causing Linguini’s head to loll to Colette, give her a lazy
|
|
nod, then turn back to his work.
|
|
|
|
COLETTE
|
|
So. The Chef. He invited you in for
|
|
a drink? That’s big, that’s big.
|
|
What did he say?
|
|
|
|
|
|
86 INT. UNDER LINGUINI’S TOQUE 86
|
|
|
|
Remy hesitates. There’s no hair he can pull for speech!
|
|
Desperate, he pulls the head-turn hair again.
|
|
|
|
RESUME SCENE
|
|
|
|
Linguini’s head lolls lazily back to Colette, the effect
|
|
being a smug “What do you think he said, babe?”
|
|
|
|
COLETTE
|
|
What-- you can’t tell me?
|
|
71.
|
|
|
|
|
|
Linguini is silent. He resumes cutting. Colette goes cold.
|
|
|
|
COLETTE
|
|
Oh. Forgive me for intruding on
|
|
your deep, personal relationship
|
|
with the Chef. I see how it is. You
|
|
get me to teach you a few kitchen
|
|
tricks to dazzle the boss, and then
|
|
you blow past me?
|
|
|
|
|
|
87 INT. UNDER LINGUINI’S TOQUE 87
|
|
|
|
Things are going bad fast. Remy keeps Linguini chopping,
|
|
hoping desperately for an idea to salvage the situation.
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
Ca’mon. Wake up, wake up--!
|
|
|
|
RESUME SCENE
|
|
|
|
Linguini keeps chopping vegetables like a hip zombie. His
|
|
smirking face rolls in Colette’s direction.
|
|
|
|
COLETTE
|
|
(small, hurt)
|
|
I thought you were different. I
|
|
thought you thought I was
|
|
different. I thought--
|
|
|
|
Now, seemingly looking straight at her, Linguini SNORES.
|
|
|
|
Colette GASPS and delivers a roundhouse SLAP to Linguini’s
|
|
face. Linguini CORKSCREWS and CRASHES to the floor.
|
|
|
|
Linguini now completely awake and utterly confused at the
|
|
crucial chunk of his life he’s somehow missed, looks up at
|
|
the furious Colette with wide eyes.
|
|
|
|
COLETTE
|
|
I didn’t have to help you. If I
|
|
looked out only for myself, I could
|
|
have let you drown. But --
|
|
(this is hard for her)
|
|
-- I wanted you to succeed. I liked
|
|
you. My mistake.
|
|
|
|
Colette turns, storming out the kitchen’s back door. Both
|
|
Linguini and Remy- who peers out of Linguini’s fallen
|
|
toque, watch he go. Linguini turns to Remy.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
72.
|
|
|
|
|
|
It’s over, Little Chef. I can’t do
|
|
it anymore.
|
|
|
|
He grabs the toque with Remy inside and runs after Colette.
|
|
|
|
|
|
88 EXT. OUTSIDE GUSTEAU’S - ALLEY BEHIND KITCHEN - CONTINUOUS 88
|
|
|
|
Colette is already on her motorcycle. Linguini runs to her.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
Stop--! Don’t motorcycle away--
|
|
(She atops, looks at him)
|
|
Look. I’m no good with words. I’m
|
|
no good with food, either. At least
|
|
not without your help.
|
|
|
|
COLETTE
|
|
I hate false modesty. It’s just
|
|
another way to lie. You have talent
|
|
--
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
But I don’t! Really! It’s not me!
|
|
|
|
|
|
89 INT. UNDER LINGUINI’S TOQUE 89
|
|
|
|
Remy eyes widen: this can’t be happening.
|
|
|
|
RESUME LINGUINI & COLETTE
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
And when I added those extra
|
|
ingredients instead of following
|
|
the recipe like you said-- that
|
|
wasn’t me either!
|
|
|
|
COLETTE
|
|
What do you mean?
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
I mean I wouldn’t have done that. I
|
|
would’ve followed the recipe, I
|
|
would’ve followed your advice. I
|
|
would’ve followed your advice to
|
|
the ends of the earth because I
|
|
love -- your advice.
|
|
|
|
COLETTE
|
|
But?
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
73.
|
|
|
|
|
|
But, I have a secret.
|
|
|
|
|
|
90 INT. UNDER LINGUINI’S TOQUE 90
|
|
|
|
Remy’s really getting worried now.
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
(softly)
|
|
Don’t do it --
|
|
|
|
RESUME SCENE
|
|
|
|
Colette’s eyes narrow. She’s not liking the sound of this.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
It’s sort of disturbing.
|
|
|
|
Linguini chuckles sheepishly, then straightens as if to
|
|
make an announcement, taking a deep breath.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
I have a rr -- aah--uht --
|
|
|
|
COLETTE
|
|
What?
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
I have a rahh -- tsh-
|
|
|
|
COLETTE
|
|
You have a rash?
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
NO! No -- I have this tiny, a
|
|
little, uh, little, a--
|
|
(quickly blurts it out)
|
|
-- tiny chef who tells me what to
|
|
do.
|
|
|
|
COLETTE
|
|
A tiny chef.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
Yes, yes, he’s, uh, uhhhmmn --
|
|
(points to toque)
|
|
-- he’s up here--
|
|
|
|
COLETTE
|
|
In your brain.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
Why is it so hard to talk to you??
|
|
74.
|
|
|
|
|
|
(gathering courage)
|
|
Okay. Here we go. You -- inspire
|
|
me. I’m going to risk it all. I’m
|
|
going to risk looking like the
|
|
biggest idiot psycho you’ve ever
|
|
seen.
|
|
|
|
Colette is starting to get scared. We follow her HAND as it
|
|
drops discreetly into her BAG and emerges clutching a tiny
|
|
cannister of PEPPER SPRAY. Linguini continues, impassioned.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
You wanna know why I’m such a fast
|
|
learner? Why I’m such a great cook?
|
|
Don’t laugh! I’m going to show you-
|
|
-
|
|
|
|
Colette looks WORRIED. With great resolve and trembling
|
|
hands, Linguini slowly reaches up to remove his toque--
|
|
|
|
|
|
91 INT. INSIDE LINGUINI’S TOQUE 91
|
|
|
|
Through the cloth Remy watches LINGUINI’S HANDS CLOSING IN
|
|
about to expose him and ruin it all! He YANKS on Linguini’s
|
|
hair, thrusting Linguini forward toward Colette’s face--
|
|
|
|
ON LINGUINI
|
|
|
|
-- as he plants a big KISS on Colette’s lips. Colette is
|
|
frozen, pepper spray in hand, her shock and surprise
|
|
surpassed only by Linguini’s own.
|
|
|
|
|
|
92 INT. INSIDE LINGUINI’S TOQUE 92
|
|
|
|
With furrowed brows and gritted teeth, Remy maintains
|
|
Linguini’s forward thrust kiss. This could go either way.
|
|
|
|
INTERCUT LINGUINI & COLETTE
|
|
|
|
-- as they continue their startled kiss, their eyes flash
|
|
through a myriad of emotions; surprise, fear, anger,
|
|
vulnerability, happiness, and finally surrender. Their arms
|
|
wrap around each other.
|
|
|
|
|
|
93 INT. INSIDE LINGUINI’S TOQUE 93
|
|
|
|
Remy COLLAPSES with relief. For the moment anyway, the
|
|
fragile charade survives.
|
|
75.
|
|
|
|
|
|
94 INT. INSIDE EGO’S OFFICE - LATE AFTERNOON 94
|
|
|
|
A very tall, very narrow room, simultaneously grand and
|
|
claustrophobic. Its soaring windows are framed by heavy
|
|
velvet drapes pulled nearly shut, allowing in only a thin
|
|
sliver of pale light.
|
|
|
|
The few pieces of antique furniture in the room are equally
|
|
tall, narrow, straight-backed and uncomfortable looking.
|
|
|
|
The faded burgundy walls are decorated with framed
|
|
photographs and magazine covers, precisely arranged around
|
|
a massive PORTRAIT PAINTING. Their single subject, a tall,
|
|
cadaverous man dressed in an expensive suit; ANTON EGO the
|
|
same Anton Ego who now sits at a desk that is the rooms
|
|
focal point, looming over an ancient typewriter like a
|
|
vulture with better posture.
|
|
|
|
The rooms lone door opens, and a short, pudgy man in his
|
|
mid-thirties enters. This is Ego’s assistant, AMBRISTER
|
|
MINION.
|
|
|
|
EGO
|
|
What is it, Ambrister?
|
|
|
|
MINION
|
|
Gusteau’s.
|
|
|
|
EGO
|
|
Finally closing is it?
|
|
|
|
MINION
|
|
No.
|
|
|
|
Linguini AWAKENS. Someone is POUNDING is at his office
|
|
door.
|
|
|
|
EGO
|
|
More financial trouble?
|
|
|
|
MINION
|
|
No, it’s --
|
|
|
|
EGO
|
|
(losing patience)
|
|
-- announced a new line of
|
|
microwave eggroles, what? Spit it
|
|
out.
|
|
|
|
MINION
|
|
-- it’s come back. It’s --
|
|
(bewildered)
|
|
-- popular.
|
|
76.
|
|
|
|
|
|
Ego looks up, eyes flashing.
|
|
|
|
EGO
|
|
I haven’t reviewed Gusteau’s in
|
|
years.
|
|
|
|
MINION
|
|
No, Sir.
|
|
|
|
Ego pulls open his files, deftly riffling through folders.
|
|
|
|
EGO
|
|
My last review condemned it to the
|
|
tourist trade.
|
|
|
|
MINION
|
|
Yes, Sir --
|
|
|
|
Ego locates the review and plucks it from the files,
|
|
reading it aloud as if it were divinely inspired.
|
|
|
|
EGO
|
|
I said--
|
|
(reading)
|
|
“Gusteau has finally found his
|
|
rightful place in history, right
|
|
alongside another, equally famous
|
|
Chef-- Monsieur ‘Boyardee’”.
|
|
|
|
MINION
|
|
Touche’ --
|
|
|
|
Rising from his desk, Ego moves menacingly toward Minion.
|
|
|
|
EGO
|
|
That is where I left it. That was
|
|
my last word. THE last word.
|
|
|
|
MINION
|
|
Yes.
|
|
|
|
EGO
|
|
Then tell me, Ambrister --
|
|
|
|
Ego now LOOMS over the cowering Minion.
|
|
|
|
EGO
|
|
-- how could it be -- “popular”?
|
|
|
|
|
|
95 INT. SKINNER’S OFFICE - DAY 95
|
|
77.
|
|
|
|
|
|
Skinner is seated at his desk, his head in his hands. Talon
|
|
sits in a chair across from him, sipping an espresso.
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
No no no NO NO NOOO!
|
|
|
|
TALON
|
|
(matter of fact)
|
|
The DNA matches, the timing works,
|
|
everything checks out. He is
|
|
Gusteau’s son.
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
This can’t just happen! The whole
|
|
thing is a set-up! The boy knows!
|
|
|
|
Skinner goes to his window, parts the blinds to the
|
|
kitchen.
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
Look at him out there, pretending
|
|
to be an idiot! He’s toying with my
|
|
mind, like a cat with a ball! Of
|
|
something!
|
|
|
|
TALON
|
|
String?
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
Yes! Playing dumb! Taunting me with
|
|
that rat!
|
|
|
|
TALON
|
|
Rat?
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
Yes! He’s consorting with it!
|
|
Deliberately trying to make me
|
|
think it’s important!
|
|
|
|
TALON
|
|
The rat.
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
Exactly.
|
|
|
|
The lawyer is watching Skinner now, eyes wide with worry.
|
|
|
|
TALON
|
|
(delicately)
|
|
Is the rat “important”?
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
78.
|
|
|
|
|
|
Of course not! He just wants me to
|
|
think that it is! Oh, I see the
|
|
theatricality of it; a rat appears
|
|
on the boy’s first night, I order
|
|
him to kill it and now he wants me
|
|
to see it everywhere -- woooooooo -
|
|
-
|
|
(snaps fingers wildly)
|
|
-- it’s here, no it isn’t, it’s
|
|
HERE! Am I seeing things, am I
|
|
crazy, is there a phantom rat or is
|
|
there not? But ohhh no! I refuse to
|
|
be sucked into his little game of -
|
|
-
|
|
|
|
Skinner is suddenly aware that Talon is staring at him.
|
|
|
|
TALON
|
|
Should I be concerned about this?
|
|
(pointedly)
|
|
About you?
|
|
|
|
|
|
96 INT. KITCHEN 96
|
|
|
|
Linguini/Remy are cooking. As Colette walks by, Linguini’s
|
|
eyes, then head start to follow her --
|
|
|
|
|
|
97 INT. INSIDE LINGUINI’S TOQUE 97
|
|
|
|
Remy wonders why Linguini’s head has drifted away from the
|
|
task at hand. He looks up: sees Colette. Rolling his eyes
|
|
at Linguini’s limited concentration, he pulls Linguini’s
|
|
hair --
|
|
|
|
RESUME SCENE
|
|
|
|
Linguini’s head jerks face forward. He frowns, annoyed at
|
|
Remy’s correction. Colette is cooking at the oven behind
|
|
him now. And Linguini’s eyes have drifted back to her
|
|
following the curves of her legs slowly up to her FACE.
|
|
|
|
She turns, catching him and SMILES. He smiles back.
|
|
|
|
|
|
98 INT. INSIDE LINGUINI’S TOQUE 98
|
|
|
|
With waning patience, Remy again JERKS Remy back on task.
|
|
|
|
|
|
99 INT. SKINNER’S OFFICE - SAME TIME 99
|
|
79.
|
|
|
|
|
|
Skinner PACES back and forth in front of Talon.
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
I can’t fire him! He’s getting
|
|
attention! If I fire him now
|
|
everyone will wonder why and the
|
|
last thing I want is people looking
|
|
into this!
|
|
|
|
TALON
|
|
What are you so worried about?
|
|
Isn’t it good to have the press?
|
|
Isn’t it good to have Gusteau’s
|
|
name getting headlines?
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
(points at Linguini
|
|
photo)
|
|
Not if they’re over HIS face!!
|
|
Gusteau’s already has a face, and
|
|
it’s fat and lovable and familiar!
|
|
And it sells burritos! Millions and
|
|
millions of burritos!
|
|
|
|
TALON
|
|
The deadline passes in three days,
|
|
then you can fire him whenever he
|
|
ceases to be a valuable. You’re
|
|
still in charge, and no one will
|
|
ever know.
|
|
|
|
Talon prepares to leave, hesitates at the door--
|
|
|
|
TALON
|
|
You know, I was worried about the
|
|
hair sample you gave me. I had to
|
|
send it back to the lab.
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
Why?
|
|
|
|
TALON
|
|
Because the first time it came back
|
|
identified as “rodent hair”.
|
|
|
|
Talon shrugs, chuckles and EXITS. Skinner stares, HAUNTED.
|
|
|
|
|
|
100 INT. KITCHEN 100
|
|
|
|
Under Remy’s direction, Linguini reaches for a spice.
|
|
Colette interrupts, handing him another one.
|
|
80.
|
|
|
|
|
|
COLETTE
|
|
No, no. Try this. It’s better.
|
|
|
|
|
|
101 INT. UNDER THE TOQUE 101
|
|
|
|
Remy looks at the offered spice, and scowls; he begs to
|
|
differ. As Linguini reaches to take the spice, Remy pulls
|
|
back on his hair--
|
|
|
|
INTERCUT:
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI & COLETTE WITH REMY
|
|
|
|
Linguini FLINCHES, his hand HESITATING; withdrawing then
|
|
reaching forward-back-forward-back.
|
|
|
|
Colette watches this odd display, still holding the spice
|
|
out. Linguini grabs the wrist of his reaching hand, forcing
|
|
it toward the spices, as REMY TUGS at Linguini’s hair,
|
|
directing him just as hard in the opposite direction.
|
|
|
|
It’s a battle for control that Linguini WINS; his hand
|
|
finally grabs the spice tin. He smiles at Colette.
|
|
|
|
Underneath the toque, Remy GRIMACES.
|
|
|
|
|
|
102 EXT. ALLEYWAY BEHIND KITCHEN - LATER 102
|
|
|
|
The dinner rush finished, Linguini and Colette exit the
|
|
kitchen laughing and holding hands. She pulls him aboard
|
|
her motorcycle and they peel out into the young Paris
|
|
night.
|
|
|
|
|
|
103 EXT. PARIS STREETS - TRAVELING - NIGHT 103
|
|
|
|
Linguini and Colette laugh and scream as the wind rips by,
|
|
Linguini barely able to hang on to his toque and we realize
|
|
REMY IS STILL INSIDE, HOLDING ON FOR DEAR LIFE!
|
|
|
|
As Colette takes a sharp turn, Linguini drops his arms to
|
|
steady himself and his TOQUE (WITH REMY INSIDE) FLIES OFF
|
|
HIS HEAD and tumbles to the street!
|
|
|
|
Dazed, Remy emerges from the battered toque to see
|
|
Colette’s cycle disappear over the horizon!
|
|
81.
|
|
|
|
|
|
Car horns BLARE. Remy turns to see a massive WALL OF
|
|
TRAFFIC barreling toward him. He dives clear as CARS roar
|
|
past, wheels screech and lights flash in all directions as
|
|
he madly scrambles out of their way, finally making it to
|
|
the curb.
|
|
|
|
Remy looks up as a young woman recoils, jumping back into
|
|
her sweethearts arms.
|
|
|
|
WOMAN
|
|
A RAT!
|
|
|
|
Her escort swats at Remy with his coat. Remy runs, jumping
|
|
into a nearby STORM DRAIN.
|
|
|
|
|
|
104 INT. INSIDE THE STORM DRAIN 104
|
|
|
|
Remy tumbles to the cement floor, his heart pounding.
|
|
Through the grate he sees the legs of the WOMAN and her
|
|
ESCORT.
|
|
|
|
WOMAN (O.S.)
|
|
Disgusting little creatures --
|
|
|
|
Remy listens, pained. He spies his reflection in a pool of
|
|
water at this feet. He turns, slowly disappearing into the
|
|
sewer’s darkness.
|
|
|
|
REMY (V.O.)
|
|
I was reminded how fragile it all
|
|
was. How the world really saw me.
|
|
And it just kept getting better --
|
|
|
|
|
|
105 EXT. OUTSIDE BACK ENTRANCE - GUSTEAU’S - DAWN 105
|
|
|
|
Remy emerges from the curb drain, turns into the alley
|
|
behind GUSTEAU’S and heads up the back steps.
|
|
|
|
EMILE (O.S.)
|
|
Psst! Remy --
|
|
|
|
Remy turns. EMILE peeks out from behind the trash cans,
|
|
where he waits with a GROUP OF RATS, including GIT, the lab
|
|
rat.
|
|
|
|
EMILE
|
|
Hey little brother! We were afraid
|
|
you weren’t gonna show up!
|
|
|
|
GIT
|
|
Hey Remy. Howya doin’?
|
|
82.
|
|
|
|
|
|
OTHER RATS
|
|
(assorted greetings)
|
|
|
|
Remy takes Emile aside, speaking in an angry whisper.
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
You told them? Emile, that’s
|
|
exactly what I said not to do!
|
|
|
|
EMILE
|
|
But they’re my friends. I didn’t
|
|
think you meant-- I was telling ‘em
|
|
about tasting, about the nutty tang
|
|
and look, I’m sorry. I’m sorry
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
Don’t tell me you’re sorry, tell
|
|
them you’re sorry.
|
|
|
|
GIT has approached.
|
|
|
|
GIT
|
|
There a problem over here?
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
No.
|
|
(SCOWLS at Emile)
|
|
No, there is not. Wait here.
|
|
|
|
|
|
106 INT. KITCHEN - MOMENTS LATER 106
|
|
|
|
Assured the kitchen is empty, Remy hops to door handle of
|
|
the food safe and grabs it with both arms, plants his feet
|
|
on the door and pulls. The handle doesn’t budge, the door
|
|
is LOCKED. Remy is puzzled. He looks toward SKINNER’S
|
|
OFFICE.
|
|
|
|
|
|
107 INT. SKINNER’S OFFICE 107
|
|
|
|
Remy enters, a little nervous, and scampers up to Skinner’s
|
|
desk. A framed black and white PHOTO of Gusteau speaks.
|
|
|
|
GUSTEAU PHOTO
|
|
Remy, what are you doing in here?
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
Emile shows up-- I said not to, but
|
|
he goes and blabs- it’s a disaster.
|
|
Anyway, they’re hungry, the food
|
|
safe is locked, I need the key.
|
|
83.
|
|
|
|
|
|
GUSTEAU PHOTO
|
|
They want you to steal food?
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
Yes. No -- it’s complicated. It’s
|
|
family. They don’t have your
|
|
ideals.
|
|
|
|
The collection of cardboard GUSTEAU STANDEES come to life:
|
|
|
|
TEXAN GUSTEAU
|
|
Ideals? If Chef Fancy Pants had any
|
|
ideals you think I’d be hawkin’
|
|
barbecue over here?
|
|
|
|
MEXICAN GUSTEAU
|
|
Or Microwave burritos?
|
|
|
|
COLONEL GUSTEAU
|
|
Or tooth- I say, toothpickin’
|
|
Chicken? S’about as French as a
|
|
Corn Dawg!
|
|
|
|
The SKETCH of Gusteau as a dog-like ear of corn BARKS.
|
|
|
|
CORN DOG GUSTEAU
|
|
(waves COMING SOON sign)
|
|
Woof! Rumming Roon!
|
|
|
|
TEXAN GUSTEAU
|
|
HAH! We’re inventin’ new ways to
|
|
sell out over here!
|
|
|
|
SCOTTISH GUSTEAU
|
|
Will ye’ be wantin’ some HAGGIS
|
|
BITES, then?
|
|
|
|
GUSTEAU PHOTO
|
|
I cannot control how they use my
|
|
image Remy, I am dead!
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
Will you guys SHUT UP??
|
|
(they do, instantly)
|
|
I’ve gotta think!
|
|
|
|
Remy climbs over the edge of Skinner’s desk, pushes open
|
|
the drawer, and begins to rummage through its contents.
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
84.
|
|
|
|
|
|
Word’s getting out and if I can’t
|
|
keep them quiet, the entire clan’s
|
|
going to be after me with their
|
|
mouths open and --
|
|
(he finds the key)
|
|
--ah! Here it is. Hey --
|
|
|
|
Remy notices a FILE labeled “Gusteau: Last Will &
|
|
Testament”. He turns to the Gusteau portrait.
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
-- your will --!
|
|
|
|
GUSTEAU PHOTO
|
|
This used to be my office.
|
|
|
|
Remy pulls the file from the drawer and lays it on the
|
|
desk.
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
This is interesting. Mind if I --?
|
|
|
|
GUSTEAU PHOTO
|
|
Not at all.
|
|
|
|
Remy flips open the file. There, alongside Gusteau’s will,
|
|
are recent press clippings featuring LINGUINI, and the
|
|
letter to Skinner from Linguini’s mother.
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
“Linguini”? Why would Linguini be
|
|
filed with your will?
|
|
|
|
MUSIC BUILDS as Remy reads; his eyes jumping between the
|
|
LETTER and the WILL, his eyes getting BIGGER until --
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
HE’S YOUR SON???
|
|
|
|
GUSTEAU
|
|
I -- have a -- SON?
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
YES. How could you not know this??
|
|
|
|
GUSTEAU
|
|
(defensive)
|
|
I am a figment of your imagination!
|
|
You did not know! How could I??
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
Well, YOUR SON is the rightful
|
|
owner of this restaurant!
|
|
85.
|
|
|
|
|
|
SKINNER OPENS the office door and FREEZES, stunned by the
|
|
|
|
bizarre sight of a RAT on his desk top. Remy SNATCHES the
|
|
|
|
DOCUMENTS in his mouth and RUNS.
|
|
|
|
|
|
108 EXT. OUTSIDE BACK KITCHEN ENTRANCE - MORNING - CONTINUOUS 108
|
|
|
|
Remy races out into the street. Hot on his heels, Skinner
|
|
runs smack into LALO on a moped. Before the mortified Lalo
|
|
can apologize Skinner is back on his feet.
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
No -- NO --! The rat! It’s stolen
|
|
my documents! It’s getting away!!
|
|
|
|
With an crazed shriek, Skinner pushes Lalo off the scooter,
|
|
jumps on and roars off down the street.
|
|
|
|
|
|
109 EXT. PARIS STREETS - CONTINUOUS 109
|
|
|
|
Skinner screeches to a stop at the INTERSECTION, looks
|
|
around wildly for Remy. He sights the DOCUMENTS scampering
|
|
through traffic and guns the motor, recklessly giving
|
|
chase.
|
|
|
|
|
|
110 EXT. NEAR THE SEINE - MOVING WITH SKINNER 110
|
|
|
|
Closing in on Remy, Skinner reaches down to snatch the
|
|
documents when the rat suddenly VEERS. Skinner’s Moped
|
|
plunges down a flight of steps to the river, where it lays
|
|
in a heap at the bottom.
|
|
|
|
Skinner looks up, sees REMY looking down at him from the
|
|
balustrade, documents still clutched in his mouth. Remy
|
|
LAUGHS. A gust from a passing BUS sweeps the WILL from
|
|
Remy’s open jaws and high into the air, where it flutters
|
|
out over the river’s edge.
|
|
|
|
|
|
111 EXT. MOVING ALONG THE BANKS - CONTINUOUS 111
|
|
|
|
SKINNER sees his chance. He clambers aboard the Moped and
|
|
takes off after the will, dodging obstacles and passers-by
|
|
to pursue from the banks below. Remy chases it from the
|
|
balustrade above, the letter still in his mouth.
|
|
|
|
THE WILL begins to descend, flitting toward Skinner below,
|
|
who reaches for it, his fingers spreading wide.
|
|
86.
|
|
|
|
|
|
Remy makes two desperate LEAPS; from the balustrade to a
|
|
tree, from the tree into the air just above Skinner where
|
|
he--
|
|
|
|
INTERCEPTS the will sailing toward the water and landing
|
|
with a FWOP on the canvas roof of a Bateux Mouche. Remy
|
|
can’t believe he’s got both documents again.
|
|
|
|
Neither can Skinner. He ditches the Moped and LEAPS to the
|
|
deck of the Seine boat.
|
|
|
|
|
|
112 EXT. ON THE SEINE - MOVING BETWEEN THE BOATS 112
|
|
|
|
Remy, documents in mouth, leaps to another passing boat,
|
|
Skinner still hot on his tail.
|
|
|
|
A jam of water traffic keeps this game alive, the two
|
|
leaping from boat to boat, but the last leap, to a DINING
|
|
BOAT is too far. Remy tries anyway; launching into the air,
|
|
the documents in his mouth sweep back like WINGS and he
|
|
catches an updraft!
|
|
|
|
He SAILS across the gulf, landing miraculously on the deck.
|
|
|
|
Skinner crazily follows, making the leap of his life as he
|
|
stretches out for the dining boats’ railing and falls
|
|
short, grasping instead the tablecloth of a couple dining
|
|
near the railing, which he yanks out from under their
|
|
breakfast like an inept magician as he plunges into the
|
|
river.
|
|
|
|
Skinner sputters in the middle of the Seine as Remy hops up
|
|
to a bridge passing overhead, scampering safely away with
|
|
Skinner’s papers.
|
|
|
|
|
|
113 INT. GUSTEAU’S - SKINNER’S OFFICE - AN HOUR LATER 113
|
|
|
|
Skinner returns to his office, soaked and furious, only to
|
|
find LINGUINI sitting at his desk.
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
You?? Get out of my office.
|
|
|
|
COLETTE
|
|
He’s not in your office. You are in
|
|
his.
|
|
|
|
Colette holds up GUSTEAU’S WILL. Skinner’s jaw drops. He
|
|
looks at Linguini, who can only shrug with embarrassment.
|
|
|
|
THE FRONT PAGE OF A NEWSPAPER
|
|
87.
|
|
|
|
|
|
-- spins into a close up. Above a PHOTO OF LINGUINI, a
|
|
deer-in headlights look on his face, a HEADLINE reads:
|
|
|
|
RISING STAR CHEF DECLARED LEGAL OWNER OF GUSTEAU’S
|
|
|
|
|
|
114 INT. SKINNER’S - NOW LINGUINI’S OFFICE - DAY 114
|
|
|
|
Linguini is surrounded by the other COOKS, who raise flutes
|
|
of champagne in a toast to their new owner. Laughing,
|
|
Colette and Linguini hug. Watching from the shadows, REMY
|
|
smiles.
|
|
|
|
MONTAGE
|
|
|
|
SERIES OF SHOTS, to music, illustrating (A) Linguini’s
|
|
rise,(B) Skinner’s fall, and (C) the happy changes to
|
|
GUSTEAU’S.
|
|
|
|
INTERCUT:
|
|
|
|
(A) Various NEWSPAPER headlines: “LINGUINI CANCELS FROZEN
|
|
FOOD” “GUSTEAU’S REGAINS A LOST STAR”. Linguini shows Remy
|
|
their new, larger apartment.
|
|
|
|
(B) A disheveled Skinner alternates between spying on
|
|
Gusteau’s (looking for the rat in the kitchen) and stewing
|
|
(over the loss of his little empire, and the glowing press
|
|
coverage of Linguini).
|
|
|
|
(C) Linguini and Colette raise the blinds in Skinner’s old
|
|
office, opening it to light and a clear view of the
|
|
Kitchen.
|
|
|
|
In the alley behind the kitchen, the COOKS symbolically
|
|
burn the GUSTEAU STANDEES created to promote Skinner’s
|
|
hated FROZEN FOOD line. All cheer as the FLAMES rise
|
|
higher.
|
|
|
|
|
|
115 INT. DINING AREA - GUSTEAU’S - EARLY EVENING - DAYS LATER 115
|
|
|
|
FLASHES POP. Linguini sits at a table, posing for photos.
|
|
Several JOURNALISTS hover nearby shouting questions.
|
|
|
|
REPORTER #1
|
|
Chef Linguini! Chef Linguini! Your
|
|
rise has been meteoric, and yet you
|
|
have no formal training. What is
|
|
the secret to your genius?
|
|
|
|
|
|
116 INT. INSIDE LINGUINI’S TOQUE 116
|
|
88.
|
|
|
|
|
|
Remy reacts to the question, looking down at the head
|
|
beneath him as if to say: ”Yeah smart guy, what is your
|
|
secret?”
|
|
|
|
RESUME SCENE
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
I’m Auguste Gusteau’s son. It’s in
|
|
my blood, I guess.
|
|
|
|
REPORTER #3
|
|
But you weren’t aware of that fact
|
|
until very recently --
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
No --
|
|
|
|
REPORTER #3
|
|
-- and it resulted in your taking
|
|
ownership of this restaurant. How
|
|
did you find out?
|
|
|
|
ON REMY: His face says “Because I risked my neck”.
|
|
|
|
WITH LINGUINI
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
Some part of me just knew --
|
|
(lamely, trying it out)
|
|
-- the Gusteau part?
|
|
|
|
|
|
117 INT. UNDER THE TOQUE 117
|
|
|
|
Remy tugs a hair tuft, causing Linguini to bop himself in
|
|
the head with his frying pan.
|
|
|
|
REPORTER #1
|
|
Where do you get your inspiration?
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
Inspiration?
|
|
|
|
Again, Remy pricks up his ears.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
Inspiration has many names. Mine is
|
|
named Colette.
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
WHAT?!!
|
|
|
|
WITH LINGUINI
|
|
89.
|
|
|
|
|
|
An outraged SQUEAK erupts from inside Linguini’s toque.
|
|
Linguini quickly muffles Remy’s squeaks with both hands as
|
|
he sets his toque down on the table. Linguini sucks on his
|
|
teeth, making a squeaking sound.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
Something stuck in my teeth.
|
|
|
|
|
|
118 INT. OFFICES - MINISTRY OF HEALTH - DAY 118
|
|
|
|
Drab and cluttered. A battered telephone rings at the desk
|
|
of NADAR LESSARD, a bored bureaucrat. He turns from a pile
|
|
of paperwork and answers.
|
|
|
|
LESSARD
|
|
Health Inspector.
|
|
|
|
|
|
119 INT. PHONE BOOTH - ACROSS FROM GUSTEAU’S - SAME TIME 119
|
|
|
|
Anxious, unshaven, and wrapped in a trench coat that makes
|
|
him look vaguely like a pervert, Skinner speaks into a pay
|
|
phone as he stares at the line of dinner customers across
|
|
the street, waiting to enter Gusteau’s. INTERCUT as needed.
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
I wish to report a rat infestation.
|
|
It’s taken over my restauran -- er
|
|
-- Gusteau’s restaurant --!
|
|
|
|
LESSARD
|
|
Gusteau’s, eh? I can drop by.
|
|
(consults appointment
|
|
log)
|
|
First opening is -- three months.
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
It must happen now!
|
|
|
|
LESSARD
|
|
Monsieur, I have the information,
|
|
if someone cancels I’ll slot you
|
|
in.
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
But -- but the rat, it--
|
|
|
|
Lessard hangs up. Skinner listens to the dial tone,
|
|
deflated.
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
-- stole my documents --
|
|
90.
|
|
|
|
|
|
120 INT. KITCHEN - GUSTEAU’S RESTAURANT 120
|
|
|
|
Horst looks at the clock, scowls, and turns to Colette.
|
|
|
|
HORST
|
|
It’s past opening time.
|
|
|
|
COLETTE
|
|
He should’ve finished an hour ago.
|
|
|
|
She heaves an annoyed sigh and heads out to the dining
|
|
area.
|
|
|
|
|
|
121 INT. DINING AREA 121
|
|
|
|
Colette enters the swirl of activity to confront Linguini.
|
|
He shoots her a cocky smile, offering her a glass of
|
|
champagne.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
Bon jour, Mon Cherie. Join us. We
|
|
were talking about my inspiration.
|
|
|
|
COLETTE
|
|
(to journalists)
|
|
Yes, he calls it his “tiny Chef.”
|
|
|
|
Linguini muffles another SQUEAK of protest from under his
|
|
toque. He shoots Colette a reprimanding look, leans in and
|
|
says in a low, tight voice.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
Not that, dearest, I meant you.
|
|
|
|
Just then the front door swings open, spilling cold light
|
|
and air into the warmth of the restaurant. The press swings
|
|
its attention to the tall, backlit spectre at the entrance,
|
|
whispering his legendary name: “Ego”. He glides through
|
|
them without acknowledging their presence, and stops in
|
|
front of Linguini, who is still seated.
|
|
|
|
EGO
|
|
You are Monsieur Linguini?
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
Uh, hello.
|
|
|
|
EGO
|
|
91.
|
|
|
|
|
|
Pardon me for interrupting your
|
|
premature celebration. But I
|
|
thought it only fair to give you a
|
|
sporting chance as you are new to
|
|
this game.
|
|
|
|
|
|
122 INT. UNDER THE TOQUE 122
|
|
|
|
Remy watches with fear and awe.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
Uh, game?
|
|
|
|
EGO
|
|
Yes. And you’ve been playing
|
|
without an opponent. Which is, as
|
|
you may have guessed, against the
|
|
rules.
|
|
|
|
RESUME SCENE
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
You’re Anton Ego.
|
|
|
|
Ego chuckles, turning to the gallery, a lion almost
|
|
sympathetic toward the sacrificial lamb.
|
|
|
|
EGO
|
|
You’re slow for someone in the fast
|
|
lane.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
And you’re thin for someone who
|
|
likes food.
|
|
|
|
The lamb bites back. A murmur of surprised delight ripples
|
|
through the assembled. Ego’s eyes FLASH.
|
|
|
|
EGO
|
|
I don’t “like” food, I love it. If
|
|
I don’t love it, I don’t --
|
|
swallow.
|
|
|
|
Linguini SWALLOWS. Upper hand regained, Ego sniffs--
|
|
|
|
EGO
|
|
I will return tomorrow night with
|
|
high expectations. Pray you don’t
|
|
disappoint me.
|
|
|
|
Ego turns and sweeps out of the restaurant. There is a
|
|
heavy PAUSE. Colette turns to the assembled press.
|
|
92.
|
|
|
|
|
|
COLETTE
|
|
Listen, we hate to be rude, but,
|
|
we’re French. And it’s dinner time.
|
|
|
|
She pulls Linguini from the table and heads to the kitchen.
|
|
He calls back to the press in apology--
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
She meant to say “it’s dinner time,
|
|
and we’re French”--!
|
|
|
|
|
|
123 INT. HEAD CHEF’S OFFICE - MOMENTS LATER 123
|
|
|
|
Remy stands on the desk top, glowering at Linguini.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
Don’t give me that look. You were
|
|
distracting me in front of the
|
|
press. How am I supposed to
|
|
concentrate with you yanking my
|
|
hair all the time?
|
|
|
|
Linguini sticks out his hand, offering Remy a now familiar
|
|
ramp to his post atop Linguini’s head. Remy shoots Linguini
|
|
an “about time” look, climbs up his arm and under his
|
|
toque.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
And that’s another thing. Your
|
|
opinion isn’t the only one that
|
|
matters here. Colette knows how to
|
|
cook too, you know--
|
|
|
|
|
|
124 INT. UNDER THE TOQUE 124
|
|
|
|
The last straw. Remy grabs a hair hank and pulls too hard.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
-- OW!! Alright that’s it!!
|
|
|
|
|
|
125 EXT. OUTSIDE BACK KITCHEN ENTRANCE - DUSK 125
|
|
|
|
The door bangs open, Linguini storms out, mashing his toque
|
|
against his head, angrily shuts the door behind him. He
|
|
yanks his toque off and gets in Remy’s tiny face--
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
You take a break, little chef. I’m
|
|
not your puppet, and you’re not my
|
|
uh, puppet -- controlling -- guy.
|
|
93.
|
|
|
|
|
|
126 EXT. FROM THE ROOF ABOVE 126
|
|
|
|
SKINNER watches this strange scene, his jaw hanging open.
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
The rat is the cook!
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
You cool off and get your mind
|
|
right, little chef. Ego is coming
|
|
and I’ve gotta focus!
|
|
|
|
Skinner watches as Linguini storms back into the kitchen.
|
|
He EXITS, ducking down the fire escape.
|
|
|
|
RESUME REMY
|
|
|
|
He’s FURIOUS. In a pint-sized fit of rage he kicks a can,
|
|
then, tottering under its weight, picks up a bottle to
|
|
throw against the wall and suddenly finds himself face to
|
|
face with EMILE and his RAT PALS.
|
|
|
|
EMILE
|
|
Wow. I’ve never seen that before.
|
|
|
|
GIT
|
|
Yeah, it’s like you’re his fluffy
|
|
bunny or something.
|
|
|
|
The other rats laugh. Remy’s face goes hard.
|
|
|
|
EMILE
|
|
I’m sorry about all the guys, Remy.
|
|
I tried to limit them, but--
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
You know what? It’s okay.
|
|
(To group)
|
|
I’ve been selfish. You guys hungry?
|
|
(RATS respond eagerly)
|
|
Dinner’s on me. We’ll go after
|
|
closing time. In fact --
|
|
(to Emile, evil grin)
|
|
-- tell Dad to bring the whole
|
|
clan.
|
|
|
|
|
|
127 INT. LINGUINI’S APARTMENT - NIGHT 127
|
|
|
|
Linguini returns, calling out in the darkened apartment.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
Little chef?
|
|
94.
|
|
|
|
|
|
He looks in Remy’s little sleeping area, finding it EMPTY.
|
|
|
|
|
|
128 INT. KITCHEN - GUSTEAU’S - NIGHT 128
|
|
|
|
Horst puts the kitchen to bed. He pulls on his coat and
|
|
turns the LIGHTS OUT. Beat. A metal GRATE in the floor
|
|
lifts up, Remy and Django peek out.
|
|
|
|
DJANGO
|
|
This is great, son. An inside job.
|
|
(too loudly)
|
|
I see the appeal--!
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
Shhh!
|
|
|
|
Remy climbs out, looks around, signals the coast is clear.
|
|
An army of RATS- a crack FOOD THEFT UNIT pour in after him,
|
|
mobilizing effectively to raid the vault as he opens the
|
|
|
|
door, when all of a sudden LINGUINI RETURNS to the kitchen.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
Little Chef? Little Chef?
|
|
|
|
The CLAN RATS instantly freeze, camouflaging themselves. It
|
|
is both amazing and precarious, any close look will betray
|
|
the deception. Remy steps out, revealing himself to
|
|
Linguini.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
Hey, Little Chef. I thought you
|
|
went back to the apartment. Then
|
|
when you weren’t there, I don’t
|
|
know, it didn’t seem right --
|
|
|
|
As Linguini opens up to Remy, we cut to QUICK SHOTS: visual
|
|
gags of the rat clan hiding in plain sight, desperate to
|
|
avoid discovery. Remy listens, distracted.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
-- to leave things the way we did
|
|
so I came back, hoping you’d be
|
|
here. And here you are.
|
|
|
|
Linguini is so absorbed in his own feelings that he’s
|
|
utterly blind to the fact that the food safe door is ajar,
|
|
and that he’s caught the rats MID-HEIST.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
95.
|
|
|
|
|
|
Look. I don’t want to fight. I’ve
|
|
been under a lot of- you know,
|
|
pressure. A lot has changed in not
|
|
very much time, you know. I’m
|
|
suddenly a Gusteau and I gotta be a
|
|
Gusteau or you know, people will be
|
|
disappointed. It’s weird --
|
|
|
|
INSIDE THE FOOD SAFE: MORE QUICK SHOTS
|
|
|
|
RATS HIDE; up on the shelves, in EGG CARTONS, inside the
|
|
holes in a wedge of SWISS CHEESE, submerged in an open sack
|
|
of COFFEE BEANS, leaving only their tiny NOSES visible.
|
|
|
|
EMILE hides in the center of an ASPARAGUS BUNCH held
|
|
together by a rubber band. His eyes latch on to a juicy
|
|
BUNCH OF GRAPES, which hang literally in front of his face.
|
|
|
|
Enticed, he leans forward just enough to get his lips
|
|
around the end of a single grape, and s-l-o-w-l-y SUCKS IT
|
|
OFF THE STEM into his mouth, swallowing it whole. Mmmnn.
|
|
|
|
He glances up: another grape beckons. Emile leans for it--
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
-- I’ve never disappointed anyone
|
|
before because nobody’s ever
|
|
expected anything of me. And the
|
|
only reason anyone expects anything
|
|
from me now is because of you.
|
|
|
|
REMY listens to Linguini, shamed by his kind words.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
I haven’t been fair to you. You’ve
|
|
never failed me, and I should never
|
|
forget that.
|
|
|
|
|
|
129 INT. INSIDE THE FOOD SAFE 129
|
|
|
|
Emile, now stuffed and lumpy with grapes, eyes the last
|
|
REMAINING GRAPE on the stem. Balancing on a CHEESE WHEEL,
|
|
he lashes the asparagus rubber band to the shelf and leans
|
|
out
|
|
|
|
over the edge, straining to reach the lone grape.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
The most honorable friend a guy
|
|
could ever ask--
|
|
96.
|
|
|
|
|
|
The cheese wheel SHIFTS. Emile loses his balance and falls,
|
|
hits the floor spread-eagled. The CHEESE lands on top of
|
|
him, causing his bellyful of GRAPES to machine gun from his
|
|
mouth and hit the back of Linguini’s neck.
|
|
|
|
He TURNS sees that the food safe door is OPEN.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI (CONT'D)
|
|
What is this? What’s going on--
|
|
|
|
He pulls open the door and flips the light on. The RATS
|
|
FLEE spilling from the shelves in a squeaking, fur covered
|
|
WAVE that rushes past Linguini’s feet and out the open
|
|
door.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
(to Remy, betrayed)
|
|
You’re stealing from me??
|
|
How could you? I thought you were
|
|
my friend, I trusted you!
|
|
|
|
|
|
130 EXT. OUTSIDE KITCHEN - REAR ENTRANCE - CONTINUOUS 130
|
|
|
|
The door bursts open and a flood of rats pour out the rear
|
|
door into the alley, Linguini behind them brandishing a
|
|
mop.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
Get out! You and all your rat
|
|
buddies! And don’t come back! Or
|
|
I’ll treat you the way restaurants
|
|
are supposed to treat pests!
|
|
|
|
Linguini ducks back inside, SLAMMING the door behind him.
|
|
Remy stares in silence, devastated by what he’s done.
|
|
DJANGO and the rest of the RAT CLAN emerges from the
|
|
shadows, gathering around the group including Remy and
|
|
Emile.
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
You’re right, Dad. Who am I
|
|
kidding? We are what we are. And
|
|
we’re rats.
|
|
|
|
Remy turns, unconsciously drops to four legs and walks
|
|
slowly away, his voice distant and sad.
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
Well, he’ll leave soon, and now you
|
|
know how to get in. Steal all you
|
|
want.
|
|
97.
|
|
|
|
|
|
DJANGO
|
|
You’re not coming?
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
I’ve lost my appetite.
|
|
|
|
|
|
131 INT. DINING ROOM - GUSTEAU’S RESTAURANT - NIGHT 131
|
|
|
|
Strangely, Linguini is dressed as a WAITER. He waits on a
|
|
lone DINER, whose face is hidden behind a menu.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
Do you know what you’d like, sir?
|
|
|
|
The MENU lowers, revealing EGO. He GRINS, ravenous.
|
|
|
|
EGO
|
|
Yes; I’d like your heart, roasted
|
|
on a spit--!
|
|
|
|
Linguini is frozen in fear, his heart pounding as Ego’s
|
|
cold
|
|
|
|
chuckle turns into a ROAR.
|
|
|
|
|
|
132 INT. INSIDE HEAD CHEF’S OFFICE - MORNING - CONTINUOUS 132
|
|
|
|
Linguini AWAKENS. Someone is POUNDING is at his office
|
|
door.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
C--come, COME IN!!
|
|
|
|
The door opens and Colette leans in, speaking tenderly.
|
|
|
|
COLETTE
|
|
Today is a big day. You should say
|
|
something to them.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
Like what?
|
|
|
|
COLETTE
|
|
You are the boss. Inspire them.
|
|
|
|
|
|
133 INT. KITCHEN - MINUTES LATER 133
|
|
|
|
Linguini places a step ladder at the front of the kitchen
|
|
and stands on the top step. He clears his throat.
|
|
98.
|
|
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
Attention. Attention everyone.
|
|
|
|
The staff pauses and turns their attentions to Linguini.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
Tonight is a big night. Appetite is
|
|
coming and he’s going to have a big
|
|
Ego.
|
|
(stops, corrects himself)
|
|
I mean Ego. He’s coming. The
|
|
critic? And he’s going to order.
|
|
Something. Something from our menu.
|
|
And we’ll have to cook it. Unless
|
|
he orders something cold. Like a
|
|
salad.
|
|
|
|
The COOKS exchange confused glances. Colette wilts. This is
|
|
not the inspiration she had in mind.
|
|
|
|
|
|
134 EXT. OUTSIDE REAR KITCHEN ENTRANCE - GUSTEAU’S - SAME 134
|
|
MOMENT
|
|
|
|
Remy is watching this through the kitchen window. He sighs.
|
|
|
|
EMILE
|
|
Just can’t leave it alone, can ya’?
|
|
|
|
Emile is by the trash. Remy HOPS DOWN and walks over to
|
|
him.
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
You really shouldn’t be here during
|
|
restaurant hours, it’s not safe.
|
|
|
|
EMILE
|
|
I’m hungry. And I don’t need the
|
|
inside food to be happy. The key,
|
|
my friend, is to not be picky.
|
|
Observe.
|
|
|
|
Emile lifts the corner of a toppled-over BOX, exposing a
|
|
chunk of CHEESE. Emile chuckles, reaching for the cheese..
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
No-- WAIT--
|
|
|
|
Remy grabs Emile’s tail and pulls him clear. A HINGE DROPS,
|
|
trapping Remy inside a CAGE. Emile rushes to Remy,
|
|
panicked.
|
|
|
|
EMILE
|
|
99.
|
|
|
|
|
|
Oh no! What’ll we do?! I’ll go get
|
|
Dad!
|
|
|
|
A SHADOW looms over them. Emile quickly hides. SKINNER
|
|
picks up the trap/cage, grinning ear to ear.
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
You may think you are a chef, but
|
|
you are still only a rat.
|
|
|
|
|
|
135 INT. KITCHEN - SAME TIME 135
|
|
|
|
The cooks are sitting now, bored out of their minds.
|
|
Linguini is still talking.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
-- sure he took away a star last
|
|
time he reviewed this place. Sure,
|
|
it probably killed Gust -- Dad.
|
|
|
|
LALO
|
|
(softly to himself)
|
|
Oh, this is very bad juju here-o.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
But I’ll tell you one thing--
|
|
|
|
Mustafa bursts through the dining room door, interrupting--
|
|
|
|
MUSTAFA
|
|
Ego is here.
|
|
|
|
The air is suddenly sucked from the room. The cooks stand
|
|
alert, frightened. Sensing what is needed, Colette steps
|
|
up.
|
|
|
|
COLETTE
|
|
Arnot Ego is just another customer.
|
|
Let’s cook!
|
|
|
|
An intent look sweeps the faces of the staff. With a burst
|
|
of grunts, cries and hand claps they return to work.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
(a beat too late)
|
|
Yeah--! Let’s-- okay --
|
|
|
|
|
|
136 EXT. STREET NEAR GUSTEAU’S - MOMENTS LATER 136
|
|
|
|
Remy’s cage is set down inside the trunk of SKINNER’S CAR.
|
|
Remy looks up at Skinner.
|
|
100.
|
|
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
So! I have in mind a simple
|
|
arrangement; you will create for me
|
|
a new line of Chef Skinner frozen
|
|
foods, and I, in return, will not
|
|
kill you.
|
|
|
|
Remy STARTLES, looks aghast. Laughing, Skinner SLAMS SHUT
|
|
the trunk and EXITS toward the restaurant. Nearby, EMILE
|
|
watches cautiously.
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
Au revoir, rat!
|
|
|
|
|
|
137 INT. GUSTEAU’S RESTAURANT - DINING AREA - NIGHT 137
|
|
|
|
Mustafa draws a deep breath, gathering courage. He turns
|
|
and approaches Ego’s table.
|
|
|
|
MUSTAFA
|
|
Do you know what you’d like this
|
|
evening, sir?
|
|
|
|
Ego lifts his gaze to Mustafa.
|
|
|
|
EGO
|
|
Yes, I think I do. After reading a
|
|
lot of overheated puffery about
|
|
your new cook, you know what I’m
|
|
craving? A little perspective.
|
|
|
|
Ego SNAPS his menu shut and hands it to Mustafa.
|
|
|
|
EGO
|
|
That’s it. I’d like some fresh,
|
|
clear, well-seasoned perspective.
|
|
Can you suggest a good wine to go
|
|
with that?
|
|
|
|
MUSTAFA
|
|
(baffled)
|
|
With what, sir?
|
|
|
|
EGO
|
|
Perspective. Fresh out, I take it?
|
|
|
|
MUSTAFA
|
|
Uh -- I’m sorry?
|
|
|
|
MUSTAFA
|
|
101.
|
|
|
|
|
|
Very well. Since you’re all out of
|
|
perspective and no one else seems
|
|
to have it in this bloody town,
|
|
I’ll make you a deal; you provide
|
|
the food, I’ll provide the
|
|
perspective. Which would go nicely
|
|
with a bottle of Cheval Blanc 1947.
|
|
|
|
MUSTAFA
|
|
Uhm, I’m afraid I -- I didn’t --
|
|
your dinner selection?
|
|
|
|
Ego jumps to his feet, suddenly eye to eye with Mustafa.
|
|
|
|
EGO
|
|
Tell your “Chef Linguini” that I
|
|
want whatever he dares to serve to
|
|
me. Tell him to “hit me with his
|
|
best shot”.
|
|
|
|
Mustafa scurries off. Seated at a nearby table (and
|
|
disguised in a trenchcoat, sunglasses and beret), SKINNER
|
|
jerks his head toward Ego and speaks to his waiter--
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
(deep voice)
|
|
I will have whatever he is having.
|
|
|
|
|
|
138 INT. INSIDE SKINNER’S CAR TRUNK 138
|
|
|
|
Remy sits in the corner of his cage, alone and defeated.
|
|
The GUSTEAU SPRITE appears. He studies Remy, speaking
|
|
quietly.
|
|
|
|
GUSTEAU
|
|
So, we’ve given up.
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
Why do you say that?
|
|
|
|
GUSTEAU
|
|
(looks around, shrugs)
|
|
We are in a cage. Inside a car
|
|
trunk. Awaiting a future in frozen
|
|
food products.
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
No, I’m the one in a cage. I’ve
|
|
given up. You are free.
|
|
|
|
GUSTEAU
|
|
102.
|
|
|
|
|
|
I am only as free as you imagine me
|
|
to be. As you are.
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
Oh please. I’m sick of pretending.
|
|
I pretend to be a rat for my
|
|
father. I pretend to be a human
|
|
through Linguini. I pretend you
|
|
exist so I have someone to talk to!
|
|
You only tell me stuff I already
|
|
know! I know who I am! Why do I
|
|
need you to tell me? Why do I need
|
|
to pretend?
|
|
|
|
Gusteau smiles with affection and relief.
|
|
|
|
GUSTEAU
|
|
Ah, but you don’t, Remy --
|
|
|
|
He floats to Remy, puts his hands squarely on the rat’s
|
|
shoulders
|
|
|
|
GUSTEAU
|
|
-- you never did.
|
|
|
|
And with that, Gusteau FADES AWAY. A loud THUNK as
|
|
something hits the street pavement outside.
|
|
|
|
|
|
139 INT. CATHEDRAL ACROSS FROM GUSTEAU’S - DUSK 139
|
|
|
|
A STONE GARGOYLE has just missed the trunk of Skinner’s car
|
|
and SHATTERED on the pavement. DJANGO, clearly annoyed,
|
|
calls to GIT the muscle bound lab rat, who’s perched on the
|
|
one gargoyle-less balustrade above.
|
|
|
|
DJANGO
|
|
No. My OTHER left!
|
|
|
|
Git grunts, moves to the next gargoyle and PUSHES.
|
|
|
|
|
|
140 INT. INSIDE SKINNER’S CAR TRUNK 140
|
|
|
|
Remy, alert and excited now, calls out.
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
Dad?!!
|
|
|
|
WHAM! --the top of the trunk suddenly CAVES IN from the
|
|
second GARGOYLE’s impact. Light streams in as EMILE
|
|
appears.
|
|
103.
|
|
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
Emile!
|
|
|
|
Django joins Emile as he grabs the cage latch from the
|
|
outside. Straining with all their might, the three rats pop
|
|
it open. Remy jumps out, gives Django and Emile quick hugs
|
|
--
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
I love you guys.
|
|
|
|
-- then scrambles out the trunk and takes off toward
|
|
GUSTEAU’S.
|
|
|
|
DJANGO
|
|
Where you going??
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
(calling back)
|
|
Back to the restaurant! They’ll
|
|
fail without me!
|
|
|
|
DJANGO
|
|
WHY DO YOU CARE??
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
BECAUSE I’M A COOK!!
|
|
|
|
|
|
141 INT. INSIDE KITCHEN - GUSTEAU’S - SAME TIME 141
|
|
|
|
CHAOS. Tempers are flaring, orders are piling up and the
|
|
kitchen is dissolving under Linguini’s leadership. Holding
|
|
a pan filled with grey glop, Horst confronts Linguini.
|
|
|
|
HORST
|
|
It’s your recipe! How can you not
|
|
know your own recipe??
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
I didn’t write it down, it just
|
|
came to me!
|
|
|
|
HORST
|
|
Well make it come to you again,
|
|
because we can’t serve this!!
|
|
|
|
MUSTAFA
|
|
Where’s my order??
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
Can’t we serve them something
|
|
else?? Something I didn’t invent??
|
|
104.
|
|
|
|
|
|
LA ROUSSE
|
|
This is what they’re ordering!!
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
Make them order something else!!
|
|
Tell them we’re all out!
|
|
|
|
POMPIDOU
|
|
We can’t be all out, we just opened
|
|
|
|
LA ROUSSE
|
|
I have another idea; what if we
|
|
served them what they order??
|
|
|
|
COLETTE
|
|
We will make it. Just tell us what
|
|
you did!
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
I don’t know what I did!
|
|
|
|
HORST
|
|
We need to tell the customers
|
|
something!
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
(hysteria building)
|
|
Then tell them-- tell them-- AUGH!!
|
|
|
|
Linguini runs into his office and slams the door closed.
|
|
|
|
LA ROUSSE
|
|
(to Lalo, beat)
|
|
“Augh”?
|
|
|
|
|
|
142 EXT. OUTSIDE BACK KITCHEN ENTRANCE - GUSTEAU’S - SAME TIME 142
|
|
|
|
Django and Emile rush to stop Remy as he heads toward the
|
|
kitchen door --
|
|
|
|
DJANGO
|
|
Remy!
|
|
|
|
EMILE
|
|
They’ll see you! STOP!
|
|
|
|
-- but Remy pushes them away long enough to get inside the
|
|
doorway, exposing himself to two COOKS. The other rats
|
|
HIDE.
|
|
|
|
COLETTE
|
|
105.
|
|
|
|
|
|
He’s come far too fast! Could you
|
|
do more with as little experience??
|
|
|
|
HORST
|
|
We are not talking about me! We’re
|
|
talking about what to do right n--!
|
|
|
|
Horst suddenly FREEZES, his gaze fixed on the back
|
|
entrance. There, smack dab in the middle of the doorway,
|
|
sits REMY, as brash as a tiny gunslinger entering a saloon.
|
|
|
|
COLETTE
|
|
RAAAAT!!
|
|
|
|
Instantly the other COOKS seize dangerous utencils and
|
|
CHARGE at Remy. But REMY DOESN’T MOVE. Suddenly, a voice
|
|
SHOUTS --
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
DON’T TOUCH HIM!!
|
|
|
|
Miraculously, everyone STOPS, their weapons raised, their
|
|
gaze shifting to LINGUINI, who rushes in front of the
|
|
group.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
I know this sounds insane. But
|
|
well, the truth sounds insane
|
|
sometimes, but that doesn’t mean
|
|
it’s not. The truth.
|
|
|
|
The COOKS exchange confused glances.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
And the truth is I have no talent
|
|
at all. But this Rat, he’s the one
|
|
behind these recipes. He’s the
|
|
cook. The real cook. Little Chef?
|
|
|
|
The COOKS watch in amazement as Remy hops onto his lowered
|
|
palm. Linguini lifts Remy up to his head to demonstrate.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI (CONT’D)
|
|
He’s been hiding under my toque. He
|
|
chooses the ingredients, the
|
|
spices.
|
|
|
|
Linguini picks up some spices lifting them to Remy’s nose.
|
|
The other cooks react; this strange and familiar action of
|
|
Linguini’s is suddenly stranger than ever.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
106.
|
|
|
|
|
|
-- he’s been controlling my
|
|
actions.
|
|
|
|
Remy gives Linguini’s hair a few tugs to demonstrate,
|
|
Linguini’s limbs move correspondingly.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
He’s the reason I can cook the food
|
|
that’s exciting everyone, the
|
|
reason Ego is outside that door.
|
|
You’ve been giving me credit for
|
|
his gift. I know it’s a hard thing
|
|
to believe, but hey, you believed I
|
|
could cook, right?
|
|
|
|
Linguini laughs. The cooks stare. He looks at them,
|
|
earnest.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
Look. This works. It’s crazy, but
|
|
it works. We can be the greatest
|
|
restaurant in Paris. And this rat,
|
|
this brilliant little Chef can lead
|
|
us there. Whaddya say? You with me?
|
|
|
|
For a moment no one moves. Then HORST, tears welling up in
|
|
his eyes, crosses to a grateful, moved Linguini and hands
|
|
him his apron and toque EXITING silently out the back door.
|
|
|
|
Linguini watches stunned as, one by one, the rest of the
|
|
STAFF exits with him, leaving only COLETTE.
|
|
|
|
Colette locks eyes with Linguini, both anger and tears
|
|
welling up. Her hand comes up to slap him but doesn’t.
|
|
|
|
Her hand just trembles, and finally drops to her side. She
|
|
pushes past Linguini and out the door.
|
|
|
|
Linguini looks out at Dining room: Ego WAITS, drumming his
|
|
fingers. Soon the customers will get restless. Linguini
|
|
exchanges a sad look with Remy, shrinks into his office,
|
|
closes the door behind him.
|
|
|
|
|
|
143 EXT. PARIS STREETS - MOVING WITH COLETTE - NIGHT 143
|
|
|
|
COLETTE speeds her motorcycle recklessly through the
|
|
streets, crying. A car horn BLASTS. She STARTLES, hits the
|
|
brakes and skids TO A STOP, nearly running the red light.
|
|
|
|
She exhales, her heart racing at the close call. She looks
|
|
up. A familiar COOKBOOK beckons from the display window of
|
|
a used book store: Gusteau’s “ANYONE CAN COOK”.
|
|
107.
|
|
|
|
|
|
Colette stares at it, feeling a pang of emotion.
|
|
|
|
CLOSE ON THE COOKBOOK.
|
|
|
|
CLOSE ON COLETTE. Behind her the traffic light TURNS green.
|
|
|
|
WIDE SHOT: The traffic on either side of her begins to go.
|
|
Colette sits atop her motorcycle motionless.
|
|
|
|
RESUME GUSTEAU’S KITCHEN
|
|
|
|
Alone in the empty kitchen, Remy faces the dining room
|
|
door, feeling Ego on the other side, waiting. Remy slowly
|
|
turns away then realizes that DJANGO is also there.
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
Dad--!
|
|
(he goes to Django)
|
|
Dad, I-- I don’t know what to say.
|
|
|
|
DJANGO
|
|
I was wrong about your friend. And
|
|
about you.
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
Dad, I don’t want you to think I’m
|
|
choosing this over family. I can’t
|
|
choose between two halves of
|
|
myself.
|
|
|
|
DJANGO
|
|
I’m not talking about cooking. I’m
|
|
talking about guts. This really
|
|
means that much to you?
|
|
|
|
Almost apologetically, Remy NODS. Django sighs, then lets
|
|
out a loud whistle. The RAT CLAN emerges from the shadows,
|
|
quickly surrounding them.
|
|
|
|
DJANGO
|
|
We’re not cooks, but we are family.
|
|
You tell us what to do and we’ll
|
|
get it done.
|
|
|
|
A DOOR CREAK turns the rats attention to the back door
|
|
where-THE HEALTH INSPECTOR has just entered.
|
|
|
|
His eyes bug at the surreal sight: the KITCHEN IS FILLED
|
|
WITH RATS. Slowly, he backs toward the EXIT and BOLTS!
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
STOP THAT HEALTH INSPECTOR!
|
|
108.
|
|
|
|
|
|
Immediately DJANGO leads half the RAT CLAN after the
|
|
inspector, yelling as he exits out the door.
|
|
|
|
DJANGO
|
|
DELTA TEAM FOLLOW ME! THE REST OF
|
|
YOU STAY AND HELP REMY!
|
|
|
|
|
|
144 EXT. ALLEY BEHIND GUSTEAU’S - INSIDE INSPECTOR’S CAR 144
|
|
|
|
The inspector JAMS his keys into the ignition and turns.
|
|
The ENGINE won’t turn over. He glances at the rear view
|
|
mirror and sees: a ground-level STAMPEDE OF RATS moving out
|
|
from the kitchen TOWARD HIM.
|
|
|
|
The RATS engulf the car, covering it like a blanket. The
|
|
ENGINE comes to life. Tires SQUEAL, smoking as the car
|
|
roars from the alley in reverse and pulls a 180 into the
|
|
street, the rats covering it like a grey moss.
|
|
|
|
|
|
145 INT. KITCHEN - SAME TIME 145
|
|
|
|
The dishwasher opens with a WHOOSH of steam: DOZENS OF RATS
|
|
EMERGE, their fur clean and fluffy. They disperse with Swat
|
|
Team precision as Remy barks orders.
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
TEAM THREE WILL BE HANDLING FISH,
|
|
TEAM FOUR: ROASTED ITEMS, TEAM
|
|
FIVE: GRILL, TEAM SIX: SAUCES! GET
|
|
TO YOUR STATIONS! LET’S GO GO GO!
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
|
|
Emerges from his office and is astonished by the sight.
|
|
Remy and the rats see this is suddenly PAUSE. Linguini
|
|
walks up to Remy, suddenly filled with purpose.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
We need someone to wait tables.
|
|
|
|
Remy NODS.
|
|
|
|
CUT TO:
|
|
|
|
|
|
146 INT. CHEFS OFFICE 146
|
|
|
|
Linguini turns his backpack upside down. A pair of ROLLER
|
|
BLADES hit his desk with a CLUNK.
|
|
109.
|
|
|
|
|
|
147 INT. DINING AREA 147
|
|
|
|
Linguini, wearing the blades and a WAITERS OUTFIT, explodes
|
|
through the double doors and sweeps into the dining room,
|
|
distributing MENUS to the diners with economical precision,
|
|
followed miraculously by DRINKS, BREAD, WATER.
|
|
|
|
He arrives at Skinner’s table to refill his water.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
No, I’m sorry for any delay, but
|
|
we’re a little short tonight.
|
|
|
|
Skinner glances at EGO, who is scowling as he scribbles in
|
|
a note pad. A big smile stretches across Skinner’s face.
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
Please. Take all the time you need.
|
|
|
|
|
|
148 INT. KITCHEN 148
|
|
|
|
The kitchen is going like blazes; RATS are sauteing,
|
|
spicing, grilling, cooking up a storm. Remy, nearly
|
|
overwhelmed with the scale of production, is miraculously
|
|
handling it.
|
|
|
|
Stationed at the pass, EMILE wipes the sauce of the edges
|
|
of the plates with a cloth, the last crucial bit of quality
|
|
control. Tempted by the sauce, he tries to sneak a lick.
|
|
|
|
REMY (O.S.)
|
|
EMILE!
|
|
|
|
EMILE
|
|
(stopping himself)
|
|
Sorry!
|
|
|
|
|
|
149 INT. DINING AREA - SAME TIME 149
|
|
|
|
Ego looks impatiently at his watch, scribbles in his
|
|
notepad. Then his eyes fall to the soup. He pulls the bowl
|
|
to him, dips a spoon in, TASTING IT. Not bad --
|
|
|
|
|
|
150 INT. KITCHEN 150
|
|
|
|
The RATS are functioning like a well-oiled machine; the
|
|
perfectly prepared meals hit the pass as quickly as
|
|
Linguini can grab them. The back door pushes open to
|
|
REVEAL:
|
|
110.
|
|
|
|
|
|
COLETTE staggered by the bizarre spectacle. Looking like
|
|
she may vomit, she wheels back to the exit, when Linguini
|
|
rushes in, throwing his arms around her.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
Colette! You came back. Colette, I-
|
|
-
|
|
|
|
COLETTE
|
|
DON’T say a word. If I think about
|
|
it I might change my mind. Just
|
|
tell me what the rat wants to cook.
|
|
|
|
MOMENTS LATER
|
|
|
|
Remy flips through Gusteau’s recipe box, finds a certain
|
|
card and pulls it, showing it to Colette. She frowns.
|
|
|
|
COLETTE
|
|
Ratatouille? It’s a peasant dish.
|
|
Are you sure you want to serve this
|
|
to Ego?
|
|
|
|
Remy NODS. Colette shrugs and starts to prepare the dish.
|
|
|
|
A TIRE SCREECH is followed by a LOUD CRASH outside. COLETTE
|
|
looks up as the back door bangs open: the HEALTH INSPECTOR,
|
|
bound and gagged, floats across the floor on a cushion of
|
|
RATS, who quickly dump him in the food safe.
|
|
|
|
Colette shrugs, going with the strange night, and goes to
|
|
add the first spice to the ratatouille, but is blocked by a
|
|
WOODEN SPOON. She looks up: sees it’s held by Remy.
|
|
|
|
COLETTE
|
|
What. I’m making the ratatouille --
|
|
|
|
He looks at the her ingredients and makes a face.
|
|
|
|
COLETTE
|
|
Well, how would you prepare it?
|
|
|
|
Remy PAUSES, considering this.
|
|
|
|
|
|
151 INT. KITCHEN - DINING AREA 151
|
|
|
|
INTERCUT:
|
|
|
|
(1) Remy REIMAGINING the ratatouille; re-inventing it step
|
|
by step and demonstrating what he wants to Colette, who
|
|
expertly follows through.
|
|
111.
|
|
|
|
|
|
WITH (2) LINGUINI skating around the dining room, a ONE-MAN
|
|
WAIT STAFF.
|
|
|
|
MUSIC CRESCENDOS as LINGUINI delivers the meal to EGO’S
|
|
TABLE. Linguini then serves the identical meal to Skinner,
|
|
who’s appalled and amused to find that Ego has been served-
|
|
-
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
Ratatouille? They must be joking --
|
|
|
|
He looks over at Ego, who seems equally unimpressed.
|
|
|
|
ON EGO
|
|
|
|
He pokes a fork into the vegetables, examines them for a
|
|
moment, then brings the food to his lips.
|
|
|
|
Linguini watches, withering.
|
|
|
|
As Ego’s lips close around the ratatouille, the sound, the
|
|
restaurant around him is WHISKED AWAY.
|
|
|
|
FLASHBACK:
|
|
|
|
|
|
152 EXT. FRENCH COUNTRYSIDE - A LIFETIME AGO 152
|
|
|
|
We are inside a cozy cottage on a golden summer day. The
|
|
front door is open, a newly crashed BICYCLE lays on the
|
|
ground outside. Next to it stands a five year old ANTON EGO
|
|
with a skinned knee, valiantly holding back tears.
|
|
|
|
His young mother turns from her cooking, and gives him a
|
|
sympathetic smile. Like all mothers, she knows what to do.
|
|
|
|
MOMENTS LATER
|
|
|
|
Young EGO, already feeling better, is at a table. His
|
|
mother touches his cheek and sets a freshly made bowl of
|
|
ratatouille before him, warm and inviting. The boy takes a
|
|
spoonful into his mouth--
|
|
|
|
--AND THE PRESENT RUSHES BACK--
|
|
|
|
Ego is frozen. Astounded. His PEN slips from his hand. It
|
|
CLATTERS to the floor, breaking the spell.
|
|
|
|
Ego blinks. His eyes fall to his empty fork, which he holds
|
|
suspended near his mouth. Slowly a long-lost feeling blooms
|
|
inside him. He smiles. And has another forkful.
|
|
112.
|
|
|
|
|
|
Skinner has seen this. He looks at his ratatouille and
|
|
tastes it. He’s stunned; loving and hating it all at once--
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
(as he eats)
|
|
No -- no, it can’t be --
|
|
|
|
|
|
153 INT. KITCHEN 153
|
|
|
|
Skinner BURSTS through the double doors.
|
|
|
|
SKINNER
|
|
Who cooked the ratatouille?! I
|
|
demand to know!
|
|
|
|
A kitchen full of RATS all stop and LOOK UP AT HIM.
|
|
|
|
CUT TO:
|
|
|
|
|
|
154 INT. INSIDE FOOD SAFE 154
|
|
|
|
Skinner, bound and gagged, is tossed roughly into the
|
|
corner, where he lands next to the equally bound and gagged
|
|
HEALTH INSPECTOR. They yell muffled protests as the door
|
|
slams shut.
|
|
|
|
|
|
155 INT. DINING AREA 155
|
|
|
|
A long FINGER dabs the last smear of remaining sauce from
|
|
the plate of ratatouille. We follow it to Ego’s smiling
|
|
lips. He kisses the sauce off his finger tip and turns to
|
|
Linguini.
|
|
|
|
EGO
|
|
I can’t remember the last time I
|
|
asked a waiter to give my
|
|
compliments to the Chef. And now I
|
|
find myself in the extraordinary
|
|
position of having my waiter be the
|
|
Chef.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
I’m just your waiter tonight.
|
|
|
|
EGO
|
|
Then who do I thank for the meal?
|
|
|
|
Linguini stares for a moment, wondering how to respond.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
113.
|
|
|
|
|
|
Excuse me a minute.
|
|
|
|
Linguini skates to the kitchen doors, where Colette has
|
|
been watching from a distance. Ego squints; Linguini and
|
|
Colette are visible through the window panels in a heated
|
|
discussion. Linguini returns to Ego’s table, this time with
|
|
Colette.
|
|
|
|
EGO
|
|
Ah, you must be the Ch--
|
|
|
|
COLETTE
|
|
(interrupts)
|
|
If you wish to meet the Chef you
|
|
will have to wait until all the
|
|
other customers have gone.
|
|
|
|
Taken aback by the unprecedented demand, Ego acquiesces.
|
|
|
|
EGO
|
|
So be it.
|
|
|
|
Colette and Linguini exchange a look.
|
|
|
|
DISSOLVE TO:
|
|
|
|
LATER.
|
|
|
|
The restaurant has cleared, save for Ego, who waits with
|
|
grim patience. Linguini and Colette emerge from the kitchen
|
|
and silently cross to Ego’s table, Linguini holding a toque
|
|
upright on the flat of and outstretched hand.
|
|
|
|
Ego stares, his curiosity piqued by this strange sight.
|
|
Linguini takes a breath and lifts up the toque, revealing
|
|
REMY sitting up on the palm of his hand.
|
|
|
|
REMY (V.O.)
|
|
At first, Ego thinks it’s a joke,
|
|
but as Linguini explains, Ego’s
|
|
smile disappears.
|
|
|
|
A SERIES OF SHOTS: Inside the rat-filled kitchen, Linguini
|
|
and Remy demonstrate their unique working style to Ego,
|
|
first together, then with Remy alone. Colette withers as
|
|
Ego STARES at this in grim deadpan.
|
|
|
|
REMY (V.O.)
|
|
He doesn’t react beyond asking an
|
|
occasional question.
|
|
|
|
|
|
156 INT. DINING AREA 156
|
|
114.
|
|
|
|
|
|
Linguini and Colette are now seated at a table opposite
|
|
Ego. Remy sits on the table facing Ego, who occasionally
|
|
glances down at him. Finally Ego gets up, and bows
|
|
slightly.
|
|
|
|
REMY (V.O.)
|
|
And when the story is done, Ego
|
|
stands, thanks us for the meal--
|
|
|
|
EGO
|
|
Thank you for the meal.
|
|
|
|
REMY (V.O., CONT’)
|
|
-- and leaves without another word.
|
|
|
|
|
|
157 INT. EGO’S OFFICE - NIGHT 157
|
|
|
|
In a SERIES OF SHOTS Ego is seen pacing, brooding, staring
|
|
out one of the enormous picture windows flanking his
|
|
portrait into the night, visibly unsettled.
|
|
|
|
REMY (V.O.)
|
|
The following day his review
|
|
appears --
|
|
|
|
EGO (V.O.)
|
|
In many ways the work of a critic
|
|
is easy. We risk very little, yet
|
|
enjoy a position over those who
|
|
offer up their work and their
|
|
selves to our judgement. We thrive
|
|
on negative criticism, which is fun
|
|
to write and to read.
|
|
|
|
-- until finally, he sits down at his desk and begins to
|
|
write.
|
|
|
|
EGO (V.O.)
|
|
But, the bitter truth we critics
|
|
must face is that, in the grand
|
|
scheme of things, the average piece
|
|
of junk is probably more meaningful
|
|
than our criticism designating it
|
|
so. But there are times when a
|
|
critic truly risks something and
|
|
that is in the discovery and
|
|
defense of the new.
|
|
|
|
MONTAGE: AFTER CLOSING - NIGHT (TO DAWN)
|
|
115.
|
|
|
|
|
|
Linguini and Colette emerge from Gusteau’s kitchen into the
|
|
brisk night air, Remy with them, walking upright. No one
|
|
knows what to think. Colette and Linguini HUG anyway.
|
|
|
|
EGO (V.O.)
|
|
The world is often unkind to new
|
|
talent, new creations. The new
|
|
needs friends.
|
|
|
|
In the alley behind the kitchen, the strange human/rat
|
|
alliance amicably part ways and head to their respective
|
|
homes above and below the streets of Paris. Only Remy stays
|
|
behind, electing to take in the night and think.
|
|
|
|
EGO (V.O.)
|
|
Last night I experienced something
|
|
new, an extraordinary meal from an
|
|
singularly unexpected source. To
|
|
say that both the meal and its
|
|
maker have challenged my
|
|
preconceptions about fine cooking,
|
|
is a gross understatement, they
|
|
have rocked me to my core.
|
|
|
|
EGO’S V.O. CONTINUES as we DISSOLVE between LINGUINI,
|
|
COLETTE, EMILE and DJANGO, and see that no one, rat or
|
|
human is able to sleep this night.
|
|
|
|
EGO (V.O., CONT’D)
|
|
In the past I have made no secret
|
|
of my disdain for Chef Gusteau’s
|
|
famous motto: “Anyone Can Cook”.
|
|
But I realize only now do I truly
|
|
understand what he meant. Not
|
|
everyone can become a great artist,
|
|
but a great artist can come from
|
|
anywhere.
|
|
|
|
MONTAGE CONCLUDES with REMY staring at the Eiffel Tower as
|
|
the sky creeps into dawn.
|
|
|
|
EGO (V.O.,CONT’D)
|
|
It is difficult to imagine more
|
|
humble origins than those of the
|
|
genius now cooking at Gusteau’s,
|
|
who is, in this critic’s opinion,
|
|
nothing less than the finest Chef
|
|
in France.
|
|
|
|
|
|
158 INT. KITCHEN - GUSTEAU’S - MORNING 158
|
|
|
|
V.O. CONTINUES as a Colette & Linguini read EGO’S REVIEW--
|
|
116.
|
|
|
|
|
|
EGO (V.O.,CONT’D)
|
|
I will be returning to Gusteau’s
|
|
soon, hungry for more.
|
|
|
|
Colette and Linguini HUG. Gathered with them in Gusteau’s
|
|
kitchen, Remy & the rat clan CHEER.
|
|
|
|
REMY (V.O.)
|
|
It was a great night. The happiest
|
|
of my life. But the only thing
|
|
predictable about life is its--
|
|
|
|
SHOT: A bored worker for the MINISTRY OF HEALTH pastes
|
|
“CLOSED” notices over the front door of GUSTEAU’S.
|
|
|
|
REMY (V.O., CONT)
|
|
-- unpredictability. We had to let
|
|
Skinner and the health inspector
|
|
loose, and of course they squealed.
|
|
The food didn’t matter. Once it got
|
|
out there were rats in the kitchen,
|
|
the restaurant was closed and Ego
|
|
lost his job and his credibility.
|
|
|
|
But don’t feel too bad for him.
|
|
|
|
|
|
159 INT. A BISTRO - DAY - THE PRESENT 159
|
|
|
|
In a tiny, warmly lit room, a GROUP OF RATS (including
|
|
DJANGO & EMILE) are seated around a basket, which has been
|
|
overturned and covered with a napkin to function as a
|
|
table, listening as REMY finishes his story.
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
-- he’s doing very well as a small
|
|
business investor. He seems very
|
|
happy.
|
|
|
|
Seated next to Remy, a teenage rat frowns, skeptical.
|
|
|
|
TEEN RAT
|
|
How do you know?
|
|
|
|
Remy smiles and points through the small window into the
|
|
main dining room. There ANTON EGO, whose face now has color
|
|
and a few new pounds, dines happily at a prime table.
|
|
|
|
A small BELL rings. Remy glances down into the kitchen.
|
|
Colette is looking up at him, tapping her wristwatch.
|
|
|
|
REMY
|
|
(to other rats)
|
|
117.
|
|
|
|
|
|
Gotta go. Dinner rush.
|
|
|
|
He takes off, jumping into a counter-weighted BASKET made
|
|
especially for him. He’s quickly dropped into the kitchen.
|
|
|
|
|
|
160 INT. BISTRO KITCHEN - CONTINUOUS 160
|
|
|
|
The BASKET with Remy drops to the counter and Remy hops
|
|
off. Colette sets down a plate of Remy’s now-famous
|
|
Ratatouille, leaving the finish to Remy.
|
|
|
|
COLETTE
|
|
You know how he likes it.
|
|
|
|
Remy nods and quickly, expertly finishes the presentation.
|
|
WE FOLLOW LINGUINI, now the Maitre ‘d, as he takes the
|
|
plate into the dining room and delivers it to Ego.
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
Can I interest you in a dessert
|
|
this evening?
|
|
|
|
EGO
|
|
Don’t you always?
|
|
|
|
LINGUINI
|
|
Which one would you like?
|
|
|
|
Ego grins, turns toward the window in the kitchen door
|
|
where Remy is watching, and calls out--
|
|
|
|
EGO
|
|
Surprise me!
|
|
|
|
Remy signals Ego in the affirmative and goes off to create
|
|
something delicious.
|
|
|
|
CAMERA pulls away from this happy scene to reveal a BISTRO
|
|
jammed with open-minded foodies; a hip, cultured mixture of
|
|
bohemians of all ages, all there to enjoy good food and
|
|
life.
|
|
|
|
CAMERA CONTINUES out the window and we are --
|
|
|
|
|
|
161 EXT. OUTSIDE THE BISTRO - PARIS - DUSK 161
|
|
|
|
A long line of customers has formed outside, waiting to get
|
|
in. An elegant METAL SIGN comes into view, featuring a rat
|
|
wearing a CHEF’S TOQUE, along with the bistro’s name LA
|
|
Ratatouille.
|
|
118.
|
|
|
|
|
|
FADE OUT:
|
|
|
|
THE END
|
|
|