Prompt:
My last experience in this sub was bad but let’s try again. I (27M) have recently start working at a grocery store. My coworker (we’ll call her Kira) is pretty chill and we’ve become friends lately.

Kira loves trying new stuff with her hair and she’s had a lot of free time lately due to obvious reasons. She has been stung, bleaching, and otherwise changing her hair a lot. It’s really fried unfortunately and basically looks like straw. It’s a discolored yellowish green at the moment and she’s really unhappy with it.

She was telling me about it while we were stocking a few days ago and she asked if I think a short hair would suit her. I suggested that she just shave it off and start over given how her hair is extremely damaged and dead. She didn’t react in the moment but I later found out she was hurt. She texted one of our other coworkers about it and he told me I’d hurt Kira’s feelings.

Now I’m a pretty honest guy and usually give it to people straight. I think if a friend asks for advice you’re a bad friend if you are dishonest or sugarcoat the truth. But the thing is, I didn’t mean to hurt her feelings. AITA? ######

Response:
 YTA. I Get you were well intentioned, but you screwed up.

You basically told her that her hair is so awful she'd look better bald, that's pretty insulting

>I’m a pretty honest guy and usually give it to people straight.

This is what a***holes say

> I think if a friend asks for advice you’re a bad friend if you are dishonest or sugarcoat the truth.

Except, she didn't ask for that advice, you gave unsolicited advice. That's rude. She asked if you think she would suit short hair, not if she should shave it off, nor was she asking for your opinion on the current state of her hair.

All you had to do was say, 'Yes, you would suit short hair.' ######


Prompt: This happened a few minutes ago so it's still fresh on my mind, so I ordered chick fil a for lunch with doordash. So the guy finally arrives and he hands me my bag and instead of my Sprite in the chick fil a cup he hands me a sprite bottle and tells me that when he was driving to my house with my food the top wasn't put on correctly and when he hit a pothole the drink spilled everywhere. He told me he went to a store that was nearby and picked up a bottled sprite, I asked him why didn't you go back and he said he didn't want to be late. I told him that I want a refund for my drink and he said that he bought me another one with his money and I told him I don't care and he went in his pockets and gave me my refund for my drink. I felt like I was in the right but my roommates overheard our conversation and said that I should have just taken the sprite he gave me and leave it at that. So reddit AITA? ######

Response:
 YTA. I get the feeling that even if he *did* go back to get another one and be late, you would complain about your food being cold. So, either way, delivery guy was going to lose with you.

You took his money, and probably didn't tip him either. ######


Prompt:
I met my (42M) wife (34F) 9 years ago, her son John is 14.

My wife has John 3 weeks of the month.

My wife is due to give birth any day, she was actually due last week, her pregnancy has been extremely stressful and she’s been on bed rest for most of it.

Her son has been extremely difficult lately; saying I’m not his dad and that he’s afraid the baby will grow up to be like me and being disrespectful.

I tolerated it for a week because he’s going through a hard time but I’m fed up.

I asked my wife to send him to his fathers until the baby is born, maybe a week after the baby  is born even.

She refused saying  that she gets wanting a week after the baby is born and she’ll sort that out but she won’t send him home during her custody time, even though they’ve spent like an hour together the past two weeks.

She believes he’ll link the baby to being sent home, I believe at his attitude he’s old enough to know that we need peace and quiet at this time.

She believes that I’m being out of order, I’d ask her to speak to him but last time she did he lashed out and now she’s pass her due date I don’t want to stress her out more.

He’s too old to be acting like this when we’re both stressed out because of this complicated pregnancy, which he’s aware of.

AITA? ######

Response: YTA. I feel horrible for this child who you clearly plan to treat as less than your new baby. He *is* home. He is your stepson, not your wife's son. Please change your attitude before you do irreparable damage to this child and your family. ######


Prompt:
I (21M) sing in the shower, and I really can't help it. It's just something I do and sometimes I catch myself doing it without even realizing that I'm doing it. Lately though, I've been playing music and singing along with it.

I will admit, I am pretty much tone deaf, and my friends won't let me hear the end of it.

Since the recent worldly problems, I have been living at home with my parents and family again. I really didn't want to come back here, but they begged me to, so here I am.

I have been taking showers every other night at around 8PM, I turn on my music and start singing.

My parents and siblings put up with it for the first few showers, but since then have been getting sick of it.

The other night my bro literally opened up the door and just screamed "SHUT THE FUCK UP" and slammed the door. Holy fuck, that scared the shit out of me. I went to complain to my parents and they both looked at each other and said "you're not exactly the best singer you know". Ok yes, I know but hearing them say it like that really made me mad.

I only take showers for like 10 minutes every other night, so it's not even that big of a deal for me to just enjoy myself for such a short amount of time. I told everyone in the house that I will continue to sing since they were the ones that begged me to stay back at home. My brother rolled his eyes and my parent's said that its inconsiderate. AITA? ######

Response: YTA. I feel bad saying that, because this is clearly an activity that makes you happy. But you admit to being tone deaf, your friends criticizing your singing, and your family is united against you, so it must be pretty bad. Go on a drive and sing in your car (windows up, please). ######


Prompt: We have been dating for a year and he was showing me old photos from years ago, then photos of him and his ex came up. I said he should probably delete those now considering how serious we are, but then he snapped back saying they are memories and when he gets older he wants to have them to reminisce. AITA for wanting him to delete the photos off the phone or am I being immature for being mad that he wants to keep them? I personally always delete photos of my exs when I’m in a new relationship, but he is calling me crazy for saying he should delete them. ######

Response:
 YTA. I don’t know why most comments make a difference between those photos being on a hard drive somewhere or on his phone. Personally, all my photos still fit on my phone (a usual phone comes with several 100GB nowadays), so they are all there. That doesn’t mean I scroll through them daily.

Your phone memory can be the modern equivalent of a photo album. Would you ask him to throw away a photo album of him and his ex ?

If you don’t, I don’t see any conceptual difference between photos on phone or album. If you do, you’re weirdly controlling and YTA. ######


Prompt:
GF and I were talking and she wants to get on Birth Control to help with her cramps, which I was iffy about because of the effects it can have on her body (hormonal changes, lower libido, lack of natural lubrication, weight gain, etc). I pretty much condensed it down to it's your choice, but consider my input and keep me in the know. To which she argued it's her body and I shouldn't be part of that decision. I told her that if that's her point of view, then by that logic, whether I wear a condom or not should by my choice and she shouldn't have to part in it because it's my body.

Anyways, AITA for wanting to be in the loop?

**Edit:** I'm seeing several interesting points of view, but to clarify, I did look over the positives and negatives of BC although I'm only stating the negatives. She has body image issue (I think she's fine as she is, even if she's pudgy in certain areas, I love her for her), I'm concerned weight gain could make it worse as it is hard enough now and is a constant struggle to get her to accept she's perfect the way she and I stand behind belief despite her being insecure.

And regarding a lower libido, I know it can go the other way and result in a higher one as well (which I have no issue with), I just want her to look at both sides of the coin. Sex affects both of us and is an important part of our relationship (although not a primary focus, it's a small important part).

**Edit 2:** I'll show her this post and see how she feels about it, I just wanted to see other people's take on this, I appreciate the input as I'm sure she will as well. ######

Response:
 YTA. i do think she should inform you if she's on birth control, as a point of being in a sexual relationship, but you sound like an insufferable ass for bringing up side effects that you would find displeasing which are all mitigatable except in rare cases.

when you've experienced a period, then you can have an opinion on whether or not she should try a medication that can help her. until then, stfu about it. ######


Prompt:
I'm 38M and  my sister is 35F

When my sister was 21 she got pregnant from a one night stand, baby didnt make it unfortunately which devastated my sister but with therapy she moved on.

She met her partner a year later, four years ago she had their first child.

We're currently living with my mother to stay close together.

We got onto the topic of children and while I don't want children (neither does my partner) apparently my sisters partner wants another one so that way their child has a sibling.

She changed subject quickly  and we moved on to another subject.

We got speaking about it later and I asked her if she wanted another child, basically she said she didnt believe her son needed a sibling.

I said,, "*well, he technically already has a sibling doesn't he?*"

Apparently her partner overheard and they got into a huge argument because she hadnt told him.

She's upset with me for talking about it at all and for basically telling her husband

And her partner is upset with her, it's all a huge thing.

My mother thinks I should've never mentioned it and believes I'm out of order here.

I think her partner should've known anyway

AITA?

She had a stillbirth for everyone wondering. ######

Response:
 YTA. I cannot believe you said "well, he technically already has a sibling doesn't he?"

You win the award for asshole of the week. Even if everyone knew why would you bring up someone's dead child in such a flippant unfeeling way? A miscarriage or dead child (you don't specify which) is not "a sibling"!!! WTF! ######


Prompt:
My girlfriend (56) and I (51) have been together for about a year. I am divorced and she is a widow. Her husband passed away about three years ago.

She has a wall in her house where she measured her kids height growing up. Her kids are adults now in their 20’s, but they have their heights from when they were really little kids to fully grown. Her former husband is marked on the wall too.

We rented most of our lives so we never really had a wall like this. One day when my kids were over for dinner we decided to measure them on the wall. My girlfriend didn’t seem to mind and was acting like it was cute.

Her kids came over to visit at one point and saw the wall and they were seriously upset about it. They said it was a personal thing for their childhoods that was important to them and we were invading on that.  It is just a wall and we didn’t erase theirs, just added ours.

The thing is, they always act like we are in the way of their lives. When we went on vacation with them, they acted like it was their vacation and we were just guests. No matter what we do they’re always angry about something. I think they are just being too sensitive and looking for something to be mad about. ######

Response:
 YTA. I can see why they don’t like you.

My mum was devastated when we had the kitchen remodelled because it means the measurement lines were removed. I can’t begin to imagine how upset her kids are at you imposing yourself onto their childhood memory. ######


Prompt:
This happened days ago, but my boyfriend brought it up again. I'm white, he is black. I hurt my eye one day and it left a mark on my cheek, like a really big one. One day we both went out, a police walked by and stopped us and asked if everything was alright, and I said yes. I get extremely nervous around cops for some reason lol (I got caught smoking weed, we live in a country where weed is taboo so I was a bit traumatised), I said yes everything is fine and probably looked terrified or suspicious. He pulled my boyfriend to the side and questioned him while I was standing there. The police officer said they will talk to my BF at the station and I thought fuck they caught him with weed, he smokes as well. I was allowed to stand outside the police office and it took about 10 minutes and then they let him go. My boyfriend was furious and literally just didn't talk to me at all. I asked what happened???? Did they find any weed on you??? He told me everything that happened, they thought he had abused me etc and he said it was because he was black they thought he did something to me. I thought that was stupid and I'm sure they just were worried about me because he is very tall big and im like 5'0 and small, plus I look very young for my age. He said I shouldve done something but I just let it happen and its partly my fault. I dont see it as being my fault.

Today he brought it up again  saying how bad of a girlfriend I am for not defending him against racism.

Edit: As I mentioned in my post, I am terrified of cops or anything with authority. I would never just do or say anything that would trigger them, because after all, we do smoke weed and I was not sure if he had anything on him so I didn't want to escalate the situation.

Edit 2: I see a lot of comment about the cop being totally racist. We live in a small little country in europe, it think there is a difference between being black in my little country and in the US because of history.

AITA? ######

Response: YTA. I can see where the cops are coming from. A woman with a huge bruise acting all skittish, other people would suspect abuse, too. That being said, the fact that you didn't bother to help clear up the misunderstanding is what makes you the asshole. ######


Prompt:
My cousin \[30M\] is getting married to his girlfriend of 4 years, \[29F\]. The wedding will be in January 2021 and the invitations arrived 2 days ago. His girlfriend's family is very rich/formal and the invitations reflected that.

My husband and I \[27F\] received the invite in the mail, and they were addressed to "Mr. and Mrs. John Smith." I was livid, because they totally erased my name and my identity by referring to me as an extension of my husband. My husband thought it was old fashioned but he didn't think it was offensive.

I called my cousin yesterday night, and told him that I will not be attending because of the wording on the invitation. I said, technically he didn't even invite ME because he never even wrote my own name on the invitation. I mean, I go by my maiden name and I never took my husband's last name when we married.

My cousin apologized, said his girlfriend and her family were mainly responsible for the wedding planning, including the invitations, and he said they didn't know they were addressed like that. He said others received their invites a few days ago and nobody has complained about them so far. I told him that's no excuse for the blatant sexism on his invites and that we will not be attending.

My mother thinks I'm overreacting, she said my aunt is very upset at me and says I'm being a "drama queen". AITA here? ######

Response: YTA. I am a feminist, but I think you’re choosing the wrong battle here and being a little petty.  They addressed the invitations in a formal and traditional way. It’s not really setting feminism back in any way. Don’t be petty. If your cousin is important to you, you should go. ######


Prompt:
So daughter lives a few states away from us with her husband so we don’t see them too often. We are currently visiting for the week but things are rocky right now because of what I’m about to explain.

They like to use those Alexa devices. Before we arrived I told her I would not tolerate that she keep them out while we are here. She just told me “no” and said I’m being rude to demand that. I said I don’t care and they better be gone when we get there. I feel like she is extremely stupid and naive to think it’s safe to use those things. I don’t want my every word listened to.

Well of course we get there any she still has them out. so I did what I had to and when she or her husband weren’t looking I unplugged  them and tossed them in the trash. I feel like I’m justified because 1: she blankety disrespected my concerns and 2: she needed to learn this lesson at some point, she is stupid to own this stalkerish device, it listens to everything. Once she found out she got so pissed and told me I’m fucking insane. I told her she’s being stupid and naive and she disrespected me. Then she told me I’m being a hypocrite because I have a smartphone that listens to me all the time anyway and by my logic I should throw that away too. Uh yeah no, I don’t even use hey Siri and her mother doesn’t use google assistant. She is blatantly wrong about that. Then she demanded that I get them from the trash. I refused of course and now things are not good right now. She could’ve just put them away like I told her to but Instead she decided to ruin what could’ve been a good trip over a couple of stalking devices. Not just disrespectful but just plain stupid imo. She needs to learn yet refuses to do so. AITA? ######

Response:
 YTA. I also hate Alexa & Co and would never buy them for myself or have them in my home—but you weren’t in your home, you were in hers. You had the right to ask (not tell!!) her to remove them, and she had the right to say no. Apologize and offer to pay to replace them. You disrespected HER, and don’t seem to have any concept of that. I hope you can find a way to communicate with your daughter better.

You ruined your visit, not her. ######


Prompt: My sister and I are twins (25). She has a husband and now is having a child. I'm in a lesbian relationship and have been with my partner for nearly a year. My sister is borderline homophobic and has never made the effort with my partner. She always refers to her as my friend and that it's not possible to love somebody of the same sex. Anyway she had her baby shower last week and there was most of our family there. After she got most her gifts I proposed to my girlfriend. I've been planning this for around 2 months and decided I wanted to do it at my sisters baby shower as a way to show off my partner and how much I love her. It was an awkward disaster. She said yes btw. Anyway my sister was really rude to me and my parents weren't happy but supported my descion. My sister then texted me and said how disrespectful and fucked I am to marry my "dyke friend" at her baby shower. She still is furious at me but I don't see anything wrong with it. AITA ######

Response: YTA. How tacky. Not only that, but you knew your sister was going to react badly because she’s homophobic, so you also took a decent proposal away from your partner. You knew it was going to be a mess and you did it anyway without any regards to how you partner might feel about it. ######


Prompt:
My wife is around 3 months pregnant I believe. I went to one appointment with her and she told the doctor she was bleeding. (It was like a few spots) and they had to schedule us for an ultrasound and that made our 30 minute check up turn into a three hour ordeal just for them to tell us the baby was fine and it was probably due to heavy lifting or intercourse.

She’s also complaining all the time that she’s to sick to cook or clean and wants me to pick up the slack. I have a previous son who lives with me full time and she said she’s too sick to give him his bath at night and put him to bed now so I have to do everything. Plus I have two other daughters that I have visitation with and she’s too sick to care for them when they are here now too.

My daughters mother is also expecting again and found out it was a little boy and she told my wife about it and they were talking about how her fiancé treats her like a queen. He’s waiting on her hand and foot. Running her a bath, cooking dinner, getting up with my daughters at night if they get thirsty and tending her to her other child as well. So now my wife has this same expectation for me.

Either one of my kids moms didn’t act like this while we were together and I told my wife she was just milking it for all that it’s worth. AITA? ######

Response:
 YTA. How inconvenient for you, that you had to stay with your pregnant wife at her appointment longer than you expected, because she wanted to know if the bleeding/spotting was something to be alarmed about. You know that miscarriage often starts with spotting right?

How inconvenient for you that you have to actually parent your other 3  children and your pregnant wife can't do it for you.

Funny how you say that your exes never acted like this when they were pregnant, while one of your exes is telling your current wife how well her partner is treating her. I bet she's saying the same to him, how her ex never acted like that, and how happy she is that her partner isn't like her ex. ######


Prompt:
For reference, I live in Texas.

For april fools, I thought it would be funny if a couple friends and I dressed up, and pranked our friend who’s a DACA recipient. His parents are undocumented despite coming here a long time ago; they also speak only spanish, and very broken english. The timing for this prank was perfect because ICE is doing raids etc.

I got 2 other guys with me, who he doesn’t know, and we dressed up officially with sunglasses etc. We even printed out a fake warrant.

We went over to their apartment at 7, and started banging on their door. We said “This is ICE here, we got a tip off on an undocumented couple living here. We have a warrant signed off by (XYZ). You have the right to remain silent as anything you say can and will be used against you in the court of law” etc. We could hear them visibly panicking, and it took everything in us to keep a straight face.

We took the prank to the next level by saying, “do not attempt to run away, as we have law enforcement surrounding the area”.  We bang some more, yell OPEN UP etc. Then my friend comes out, and I say April fools, gotcha. And we throw confetti at him. He was LIVID. He unfriended me on EVERYTHING after I tried reaching him. I texted him at 9, then 10, and it’s now almost 1 now. I didn’t think the prank would backfire this badly, as I come from a prankster family. Every year we’d play pranks on each other. I understand i took it too far, but is it really worth ending a friendship of over 16 years because of this?

So, AITA for this prank that backfired badly? ######

Response:
 YTA. How can anybody think that shit is funny?
Would probably unfriend you aswell, even after 16 years of friendship. Crossed a line on that one ######


Prompt:
I'm a second-year radiology resident in a city in the Pacific Northwest. I'm a decent-looking guy, but a bit short and very socially awkward. So until recently, despite my best efforts, I've never been with anyone in any way at all. I was beginning to think I'd die a virgin without ever having been kissed...until I moved out here to Seattle. There, I found a lot of decently-put-together fairly attractive women that were living on the streets. I decided that was my best chance at sleeping with someone, and so decided to take advantage of the fact that I had a stable living situation to kick-start my romantic life.

I understand that these women are often vulnerable and in a shitty place in life; however, I always try to leave them in a better place than I found them. I buy them food and the supplies they need, leave them with a couple hundred dollars, and buy 'em six months' worth of a UPS mailbox so they can find jobs using the mailbox as a street address. I have a girlfriend, now, who's grateful for a place to live and is now in training to be a certified nurse's assistant. ######

Response:
 YTA. Holy shit dude. Being nice to vulnerable, at risk woman because 'it's your best chance to finally sleep with someone' is fucking DISGUSTING.

Maybe you worded it wrong, I want to give you the benefit of doubt. But jesus man. Being nice to a homeless woman just so they SLEEP WITH YOU and then trying to make yourself feel better by saying 'I leave them better than how I found them' is gross. ######


Prompt:
Throw away for obvious reasons. On Saturday night I (32 F) and my boyfriend (33 M) went to have dinner at his parent’s house. This was a big next step. I hadn’t met anyone in his family yet. We’ve been dating for about 6 months now.

So last week I got sick and have been taking penicillin to get over an infection and been having a lot of symptoms, one of them being gas. Most of the time it’s fine, but others, if I don’t let it out, I’ll be in excruciating pain. Everything was going great at dinner, his mom cooked a beautiful pot roast, we were all laughing and getting along famously.

All of a sudden I started getting the gas cramps so I had no choice but to try to let them out silently and once I started - I couldn’t stop. I didn’t think they smelled that bad, and some were louder than I’d hoped, but I didn’t want to step away from the table as we were in the middle of a conversation, I thought it would be rude.

I got unlucky and let one go during a lull in the conversation, it was noticeably loud, but I didn’t think you could tell it was from me. My boyfriend leaned over and asked “Are you OK? Do you need to use the restroom?” I couldn’t believe he would embarrass me in front of his family like that. The rest of the dinner I was quiet from rage.

The whole stress of the situation made my gas cramps worse. The rest of the dinner was awkward, I could tell the parents knew I was the one passing gas because of my boyfriend’s questions. He dropped me off at my place after when I was supposed to stay the night at his, and he had the audacity to drive with the windows down.

I can’t help that I have a medical condition that is causing me to pass gas. As he’s in the medical profession I thought he’d be more understanding. We haven’t talked much since Saturday and I’m just wondering AITA? ######

Response: YTA. His response was actually kind as he seemed concerned for your wellbeing and while a bit blunt that may be indicative of his medical training and being used to talking about these things in a straightforward way. Farting continuously at the table is rude and weird. If you had excused yourself to the restroom due to the issue and then he got mad you were absent or whatever that would give you the right to be mad but not this. ######


Prompt:
It made me feel like he doesn’t trust me. We live together and spend most days together and he knows all there is to know about me. I understand that people come from things they don’t like talking about; I was abused for several years of my life (which we’ve discussed in detail). But, it seems like he doesn’t care to share and connect on the same level as I have done.

*****
It’s a quarter shaped scar on the top of his wrist and he’s a rather hairy man so I just saw it today whilst holding his hand in mine and kissing it. It looked like a rough scar and I had just asked out of curiosity what happened. His response was “I don’t want to talk about it.”
I prodded a bit asking if it was something sexual since he has been rather promiscuous in his past, to which he replied “No.” and again stating he didn’t want to talk about it. I haven’t continued asking but told him how I felt on the matter. His response was that of silence initially and then later he came to tell me he loved me.

I feel like I may be in the wrong here for feeling as if he doesn’t trust me with the details of his past. But keep in mind that this is a man that talks about marrying me and our future children and seems wholly committed to all that we are. Am I wrong to believe that if you are into a relationship for the long run that your past doesn’t have to stay hidden? I’m afraid he somehow has negative beliefs about what my my reaction will be to what happened though I try to make him feel safe and comfortable in who he is. Am I failing somehow?

He’s a very loving man that cares for me greatly. I just feel shut out of his life and untrusted at this point. ######

Response: YTA. Him telling you he doesn’t want to talk about it now doesn’t mean he’s never going to talk to you about it. Give him some time. ######


Prompt:
\*posting for my mom. I am not the daughter in question, I am the brother trying to stay out of the middle of this, and suggested Reddit as a neutral arbiter. throwaway so I can share the results with both of them\*

I'm not sure either of us is an asshole here, but I am looking for different perspectives on how my comment came across.

My daughter has always been in the size 12 range. Not thin but also not obese. She's done a couple of diets here and there when her weight has crept up but I would not say she's constantly struggling with her weight or trying to lose more. She has the same general insecurities that many women do but overall is quite confident.

I haven't seen her for the last 5 weeks or so, but we were able to meet up yesterday. She's now 33 weeks and her baby bump has grown quite a bit since I saw her last. She hasn't gained noticeable weight in her face or anywhere else in her body.

When I saw her, I said, "You look great! All the weight you've gained has gone right to your stomach!"

I meant it as a compliment, I later learned she was hurt and offended by my comment.

The remaining piece of context is that because of her starting weight, her doctor had given her a goal of only gaining 15-25 pounds during pregnancy. We've talked about that several times prior to this point, and she is within that range.

So Reddit, was this a really inappropriate and rude thing to say to my daughter, even though I thought I was complimenting her? Am I an unintentional asshole? ######

Response: YTA. Here's what you say to a pregnant lady: " You look fabulous!" "Look at you, you're glowing." "Oh my God you look amazing!" How hard is it to be nice to your pregnant daughter? And why the fuck would you ever think it was appropriate to comment on her weight? ######


Prompt:
So me, my friend nd her boyfriend went out to eat today. My friend's boyfriend is what you'd call Obese, definitely. But he's nice and funny too, so we don't mind hanging out with him. It never really gets in the way. The only real problem is sitting somewhere with booths, the tables in booth's don't move so it's uncomfortable for him.

The place we chose is about 90% booths, the other seats are at the bar type area and a small table beside it, since it's a small diner. He demanded we eat somewhere else because he's "Too fat to fit in the booth". Last time he got stuck.

I told him no, it's her birthday. So we went there, the table was open but my friend wanted to sit in a booth, since she likes to people-watch out the window. So, he jammed his way into a booth and not 5 minutes later, he's complaining about the pain and how he can't breath in the seat.

I told him if he lost weight, this wouldn't be an issue. He told me to just be quiet and got all pissy. After we ate, my friend had to use the restroom but he couldn't get out, he tried pulling on the seat and the table but just couldn't get out, everyone was staring at him and he started crying of embarrassment. He couldn't get out, someone who worked there had to give him a tug to pull him out.

He was humiliated and said it was all my fault for going there. Am i at fault here? ######

Response: YTa. He’s obese but funny so you don’t mind hanging out with him? Wow. How lucky he is to have friends like you. ######


Prompt:
I'm in my third year of college as an international student, and as my contract for student dorms is about to run out and I can't go home, one of my college friends offered for me to move in with him and his family for a while. I was excited about it at first, because I've known this guy since first year and we're really good friends so it should be fun, but today he sent me a message saying he needed to tell me something before I met his family.

Turns out he's a transgender, and his family still use his birth name and call him a she, so he knew he had to tell me before I met them. I was expecting something like "my mom collects creepy dolls". I don't even know how to articulate how I feel about it. I thought this guy was one of my best friends, and I've told him so much about my life and my past that I don't normally talk about, but it turns out I didn't actually know who he was at all. I messaged him back saying that what he'd just told me was huge, and that I didn't think I wanted to live with someone who'd hidden something like that from me.

I just feel like I don't even know him anymore. He's talked to me about his childhood before, and must have been lying through his teeth about it, since he wasn't even a boy in the first place. If he's been lying about this huge thing, what else has he been lying about? I don't feel like I can trust him anymore, and I don't know if I want a friend like that. My sister thinks I'm overreacting about it and just told me to get over myself, but I really thought he was one of my closest friends and in three years he never thought to tell me this. I don't want to live with someone who would lie to me for so long, but she thinks I'm being a dick. AITA? ######

Response:
 YTA. He's not LYING about being a boy. He came out to you and offered his home to you. Obviously he ain't a friend to you if you think him not telling you he's trans is him lying about everything.

He never stopped being a boy because he didn't realize til later. ######


Prompt:
Me and my SO have been together for a year and some change. Have talked about long term goals many times like Getting our own place. But we haven't actively looked at apartments together.

For the past 2 months and half I have been staying at his place for the most part. But technically, I still live at home with parents. So today I decided to go to store, asked if I could use his car, he said fine. When I get the store, I was just getting the stuff the essentials. Making a key was a second thought. But then I saw the key machine when walking so I decided to make one then surprise him when I get home.

So when I get home from your store, I surprise him. Least to say he was not happy with it. Told me everything from "I was being sneaky for not telling him", "I want his apartment for free use", "I want to snoop when he's not around", "Not respecting his privacy", & Etc.

It's not like I haven't stayed at his place when he hasn't been home. I told him the key would be for when I need place when his isn't home or when both of us run errands we will both have convenience of having a key. Instead of us sharing one key then picking whoever has the key to do their errands fast for it doesn't cause trouble for other person. He still won't come to his senses, if I was in the wrong tell me. Need another perspective. ######

Response:
 YTA. He trusted you with his keys, and you showed him that you would take advantage of that trust to force yourself into having access to his house without his permission.

You can ask for a key. He can decide to offer you a key. You can not decide on your own to take someone's key and make a copy. That is a major violation of a person's sense of personal space, boundaries, and safety.

If I were your boyfriend I would be reconsidering how I felt about the relationship.

He's 100% right about you being sneaky, and not respecting his privacy. And he's 100% reasonable to be feeling like you might be using him and want to snoop. ######


Prompt:
My ex and I have a 12yo son who splits his time between us. We literally live across the street from each other. We both had to work at our offices and our son asked to stay home to do his online classes. My ex wanted him to go to work with me but I said to let him stay and be independent (he is at my house today).

I got a call from my ex asking me why our son wasn't online at his classes (the teacher emails you if the student isn't online). I told him to call our son and he said he did. I tried calling him to no avail. My ex got mad and demanded that I leave work to check on him and I told him since he worked closer.

My son called me 20 mins in tears that his dad yelled at him and took his Xbox away and didn't tell him when he would get it back. He said he missed one class because he overslept. He said his alarm didn't go off so it wasn't his fault.

I called my ex and he said he's taking the Xbox for the weekend for missing class and didn't care the circumstances. I told him to cut him slack. He's generally a good kid and under a lot of stress. He said he did not care and better learn now than later.

I told him he was acting like a psycho and be hung up on me. ######

Response: YTA. He sounds like a stricter parent than you, but not a psycho. Ex clearly doubted whether your son would be able to independently manage his own schooling from home without adult oversight from the beginning of this situation, and son proved him right by sleeping in and skipping class. Yes, maybe a warning would have sufficed for a first-time offense, but different parents have different rules. The yelling bothers me more than the XBox suspension, but I'm mindful of the fact that your son was pretty upset when he relayed this. All sorts of bad ideas about what could have happened to your AWOL son probably went through his mind as he drove home; any parent would have had their emotions turned up at that point. ######


Prompt: So my son wanted to grow his hair out for the past few months now and I would tell him no because I don't like how it looks on men. He would try to convince me other wise but I would tell him no, he asked me again in December and I told him "Look if you can get a non-stop streak of 100's on your tests from now to the end of the school year I'll let you do it" and he agreed, I know this sounds bad but I only made that deal because he is a horrible test taker and I didn't think he could actually do it, but somehow he did. He came up to me yesterday and told me that he had finished his last tests of his school year and I asked him what he meant the school year isn't over yet, and he showed me that his teachers had sent a email saying that they were doing only one online test per class and he had just finished them and got a 100. He also showed me the grades on every other test and quiz and he got 100's, I was happy for him and he said "I can finally grow out my hair" and I stopped for a minute, I had forgot I promised him this. I told him as nicely as I could that I only made that deal because I thought he wouldn't actually do it and that I still won't let him do it, he got mad and said "But you said if I got all 100's I could, you lied to me" I told him "I'm sorry but look you got all 100's on your tests".He got mad and said "No I did all that extra studying and spending weekends doing nothing but studying, I missed my friends birthday trip he invited me on" and I told him "You're supposed to study anyways, I owe you nothing you're supposed to get 100's anyways". He called me a lying snake and went up to his room. He called his dad (we are divorced) and he called me to tell me that I'm a liar and whether or not he is supposed to get all 100's you still made a promise and need to go thew with it. Look I understand I made a promise but to be fair he should have been doing this regardless but AITA? ######

Response:
 YTA. He should be able to grow out his hair no matter what. He doesn't need your antiquated thoughts about what boys "should" look like.

But on top of that, you made him a promise, he sacrificed to make it happen and now you're backing out? You are horrible. ######


Prompt:
So last summer my boyfriend (20M) went on an archeological dig in Central America with his professor. He was to be there on the dig with her for 2 weeks and then travel as a tourist with a friend (independent of the professor or university) for 3 weeks. I was having a pretty rough time mental health wise back home and had asked him to call or at least text every night, just so I at least knew he was okay.

He missed one night and the following night I asked him what happened and if everything was okay. He said that he and his professor had gone out the previous night clubbing/bar-hopping and then ended up getting really drunk and spending the night at a stranger's house.

I was of course angry at him for being inconsiderate and overall unfeeling about my position, but I was also concerned that the professor had engaged in this behavior with him. After a few weeks I anonymously reported what had happened to the university--I just couldn't get it out of my head, what would I do if in a few years there was a story of someone being hurt because of them and I hadn't done anything about it? When my boyfriend found out he blew up at me and called me petty, selfish, and dangerous, and that he would never be able to trust or love me again.

This has been several months ago now, but it still hurts. Was I in the wrong? In hindsight I wish I had spoken in person with the head of the department and told by bf what I was going to do before I did it, but I still think it was right to say something. He says no and that I have too much faith in authority and that my morals are guided by just whatever the law/rule. I don't think that at all (if I did wouldn't I have reported him for dealing weed long ago?) but I love him so much, and I believe he loved me. AITA? ######

Response: YTA. He neglected to call you on *one night* and you chose the nuclear option. Not OK. Please discuss this with your therapist. ######


Prompt:
So I met this guy online, haven’t got the chance to meet in real life yet because of the Corona and he’s still stuck in another country. We seen each other’s pictures, I don’t think I’m that shallow of a person so I never bother to ask him more pictures nor do I bother to ask him for his Instagram. He looks normal in his pictures, of course, there’s never a standing position kind of picture. His feet is mostly hidden in most pictures, and there’s several pictures where he looks normal; there’s a picture of him on a horse, just sitting on a chair, sitting on the pool and etc but never on a wheelchair.

We’ve only been talking for two weeks ish and today I woke up to him following me on Instagram, which I never told him to nor I told him my full name. I checked out his profile and he mentioned something with disability pride on his profile, I’m confused since he never said anything so I scrolled more. Most are scenery because he travels a lot but when there’s him, it’s mostly selfies and then there’s him on a wheelchair. I was surprised so I scrolled more and even checked on his “tagged in” pictures, to find out he really is on a wheelchair. I haven’t replied to his message nor do I follow his instagram back because I’m upset that he never told me he’s on a wheelchair, and I felt like he was hiding it? I don’t have a problem with him being on a wheelchair but I just didn’t expect this so I’m pretty upset.

AITA for feeling like this? ######

Response: YTA. He looked normal? Uh, probably because he is. ######


Prompt:
2 years ago I needed a kidney transplant due to kidney failure and my brother said he would donate one of his. So long story short he gets his kidney removed and I get my surgery, that should be the end of it right? Wrong because after my recovery (They visited me in the hospital btw) my family comes to visit me and I thank my brother for the millionth time and he says this "It's fine I'm just gonna say this though, there will be a time I ask you for a favor and you can't say no" and starts laughing saying "I'm just playing nah the only thing you gotta do for me is stay alive and don't put us in a scare like that again" and everyone laughed.

That stuck with me, because I remembered back when we were younger he would pull the "you owe me" card, like when we were kids we had this mystery pokemon figure pack and I got a Zapdos and he said "Yo please let me have that I let you have my Mewtwo and you said that you owe me one" others would be with things like chips and food. So after a week of that on my mind I cut contact with him because I was scared he wasn't playing around, he tried to call me on Easter 5 times and I ignored him. My Dad called me to ask why I was ignoring my brother and I told him and he said I was being overly paranoid. They haven't told him and the last thing he text me was "Look If I said anything wrong I'm sorry but please say something". I haven't heard from him in 2 months and I started to think I was being an ass about this so AITA? ######

Response: YTA. He hasn't tried to call in a favor. And he gave you a whole organ out his body. Your reaction is totally disproportionate to the circumstances. ######


Prompt:
Throaway acc.

I was very badly verbally abused as a kid which made me have some kind of trigger to being talked to a certain way. I'm not upset at criticism at all or anything that isn't rude but sarcasm and being rude as a joke sets me off. I always have given people warnings that I don't like to be talked down to, even as a joke.

Usually people understand. However, sometimes I will go over to a friend's house and their siblings will be in the "its cool of me to be playfully rude and say fuck a lot" phases. I let their siblings know too and they seem to understand until they do it. One of my friend's brothers (19) said something along the lines of: "My god, how can you make that mistake? You're so fuckin dumb" during a video game and I snapped. I told him that if he ever calls me dumb or anything of the sort ever again I will make him regret or something like that. He looked scared and I feel bad. It happens a lot when people flippantly say rude stuff they don't get is rude. I feel like an asshole because its hard for me to control this kind of response when people talk to me like that. ######

Response: YTA. Having triggers doesn’t excuse your overreaction and threat. ######


Prompt: for context: i given my main email to the teachers because were learning from google drive. as for my main email i use my "ultimate nickname" that i use everywhere. my IT teacher is the only one complaining about this and she wont leave me alone. i dont wanna create another email because i'd forget about it easily. now that since this conversation happened in the messenger group, some of the girls in the class (that i never talk to but they hate me for some reason, their average is so low that they will sure fail this year so i wont be seeing them next year) are telling me too to change my name too because of the simple reason that they dislike me. basically now the whole class hates me or at least 7 people for sure. all thats because i dont wanna change my name can anyone help with this thank you for reading ######

Response: YTA. Having separate personal and professional email accounts is *really* common, partly for this reason. Also, YTA for bringing up irrelevant stuff about other peoples' grades to try and make yourself look good. ######


Prompt:
(if you’re wondering, i would be the asshole, and i’m going to be working on assessing that insecurity that prompted this discomfort within myself. with that being said, try not to hate me too much as you read.)

my boyfriend has hung a very large rainbow flag in his room. i am aware that the rainbow flag is representative of the whole lgbt community but also the rainbow flag is often considered the gay flag, which is why i’m a bit confused.

my boyfriend is bisexual. i am also. i am a little discomforted by this flag’s presence. i don’t own him, i will not request he take it down, he is his own person allowed to live and decorate as he pleases, but would i be the asshole for voicing my discomfort?

i’ve asked a few people, one called me homophobic and biphobic for being upset, one said i’m rightfully upset but shouldn’t bring it up, and one that said it’s completely disrespectful and i should be angry and talk to him.

it feels like he’s taking pride in being attracted to men...while he’s dating a woman. i also don’t want to censor him, but mostly, i want to be honest and let him know how i feel.

so, reddit, WIBTA if i told my boyfriend the pride flag he’s hung up makes me a little insecure as his girlfriend and i’m a bit uncomfortable with it?

EDIT: i AM NOT and WOULD NEVER ask him to take it down, i’m asking if i should bring up my personal feelings about what it represents or if i should keep them to myself.

EDIT 2: the phrase i used, “it feels like he’s taking pride in being attracted to men...while he’s dating a woman” has been problematic to some people. i think i must be harboring some insecurity because of his history of flirting while being in relationships. i see now how that could be perceived as near homophobic on my half and i apologize for that, i think it’s misplaced insecurity that has nothing to do with his sexuality and more to do with his history of being unfaithful. ######

Response: YTA. Having a flag up doesn’t change the fact that he’s made a commitment to you anymore than taking it down will alter his sexuality. ######


Prompt:
I live in a house with 3 other girls, it's a tall old Victorian building and an extension was put in on the top floor. This means we have a flat roof that people can lie on, but it involves going on the balcony and climbing up the roof like the balcony.

Me and 2 of the girls have been going up there in turns to get some sunshine and sunbathe. Our other room-mate however is very very obese, I don't know her weight by going off her size it must be around 200lbs or more. She's been wanting to go onto the roof to sunbathe as well but I told her she can't, we don't know how much weight it can support as it's not a proper roof but just a sort of cover over a dormer.

This led to a big argument where I said "You're too obese to go up, we can't risk you breaking the roof". She said "fuck you" and put a foot on the tiling from the balcony which promptly cracked under he foot. She said "fuck you" again and went to her room and now isn't speaking to us.

AITA here? I weigh around 120 lbs ######

Response:
 YTA. Have you ever heard the phrase "You're not wrong, you're just an asshole?" You're not wrong, you're just an asshole. Honesty without tact is cruelty. There are much, much better ways to convey the message that you aren't sure how much weight the roof can support.

Either way, this roof sounds incredibly unsafe if a single step from a 200 pound person is enough to snap a tile. ######


Prompt:
I have 2 children, a 9 year old son and a 6 year old daughter. My son had a Minecraft world where he built quite an impressive castle on an island, which he was very proud to show to me.

Since school was canceled, he has had issues with waking up on time. He is supposed to wake up at 7 each morning, but for the past month he has been sleeping in until about 9 or 10. I always set an alarm for him, but he sleeps right through it. I don't wake him up because waking himself up is a skill that he needs to learn. I told him about 2 weeks ago that there are going to be consequences for him if he continues to sleep in every morning. At first, he understood and was waking up on time every morning. But for the past week or so, he has fallen back into old habits. I told him yesterday that this is his final warning. Today, he slept in until 11.

So I followed through with my warning, and went on the computer and deleted his favorite Minecraft world. I also took away computer privileges for the next month. When I told him, he started screaming and crying. He told me that he spent a whole year working on that world, and he's very distraught that he's never going to see it again. He has been crying and sobbing throughout the day, and has refused to eat any of his meals. ######

Response: YTA. have fun being a case study on /r/raisedbynarcissists in a few years. ######


Prompt:
I'll try to make this short. I'm (38m) and my wife (33f) have been married for 11 years. When we met I had a 7 year old cat that was my bff  I had since he was a kitten. He was literally my whole life as cheesy as that sounds. Well he lived to be 18 and I had to have him put to sleep last summer before the world shut down. The week after I just couldn't take it. I was so heartbroken and needed time alone I booked a trip to Mexico (we live in the USA) and went there for 5 days. I just needed some time alone. I didn't tell my wife until I got there. I acted like I was just going to work for the day, but went to the airport. When I got there I called her and told her where I was. She was really upset I didn't talk to her about my feelings. I just couldn't. I wanted to be alone. It's been almost a year and I still feel bad about it. We don't have kids BTW.

AITA? ######

Response: YTA. Grief is understandable. Hauling off to a different goddamn country without telling your spouse until you're already there is not. ######


Prompt:
I am the artistic director for a small dinner theatre company, which is privately owned and operated. I have worked for this company for almost 25 years, coming back in between contracts; I'm a performer as well, having been on Broadway.

Because of the pandemic, we have been unable to put on our season. We had to lay off all the staff - performers (who are also the servers), kitchen staff, front of house staff, even myself, the operations manager, and general manger.

The owners told me that the business was on the verge of collapse, even with the available government funding, and they needed an injection of cash to get through the next few months.

I sent an email to all my staff (performers/servers) letting them know that the owners were in dire financial straights because of the pandemic. In my email I suggested we all volunteer our time and talent and put on a virtual talent show to raise money with a GoFundMe for the owners.

I received some really strong feedback from some of the performers that they did not want to participate. Also, the company received negative feedback regarding where the donations would go, seeing as this company is not a registered charity. Some members of the public were strongly against the money going to the owners, and instead be split among the out of work staff.

AITA for coming up with this idea and asking my staff to do it? ######

Response: YTA. Good lord. It's a special kind of insult to ask someone who's been laid off to work for free for the people who laid them off. ######


Prompt:
I shared an apartment with 2 other guys. At some point I wanted to have sex so I invited girls over. The website that used host fake accounts. I got scammed and my room mates found out. They objected to me having prostitutes over.

For a little background. I lived with these guys for some time and me living was hardly anything to write about. They dont clean, dont do the dishes. They hardly talked with me. I made food for them invites them to so some fun things and they never did anything in return. After the night I got scammed they talked with me (one of the only times they showed any interest). They talked with me about that they thought I was angry about being scammed(which is was not angry about) and that they cared for me as a friend (in which I got really annoyed because holy shit do people only seem to care about me when they want something)

Another problem that arises is that they cant prove that the women that come by are prostitutes unless they ask. The second argument is that they have no right to intrude on my personal life.

Their arguments are ;is that they dont feel safe with those prostitutes around, which doesnt make sense because the women I have over didnt use bodyguards. They didnt trust them with stealing stuff, which is nonsense because I would let them roam around my house freely.

I just get so fucking frustrated. I need sex, that's a basic need that I want fulfilled. They shouldn't be bothered with me unless they get personally threatened. Which they never had been. ######

Response: YTA. Get a room. ######


Prompt: My son (15M) turned in a Spanish assignment one day late. His teacher emailed him saying that she wouldn’t accept the assignment. He emailed her back saying that the school policy during remote learning was that any missing assignment is put in as a 50% and it can be turned in in the next five days for full credit. She emailed saying that she wouldn’t accept it still. He then emailed her back and said “Eres una cara de tortilla” which means “You are a tortilla face”. She got really mad because he used the informal pronoun of you (tú) instead of the formal version (usted) and because of the insult. I told my son that this was funny only because she wasn’t following the school rules and it wasn’t even a bad insult or anything. My wife thinks I was reinforcing my son’s bad behavior. I think he was doing the right thing and standing up for himself. AITA? ######

Response:
 YTA. Gee, wonder where the kid gets his rude and obnoxious sense of humor from....

Encourage your child to handle conflict appropriately, bro. ######


Prompt:
A bit of  backstory. I recently got my bike repaired and I been riding my bike alot of the past few days. I usually cycle down footpaths because I would rather not cycle on the road and I live in a medium sized town so there are no cycle lanes. While I was cycling down hil on the footpath this family of 6 were walking towards me. I pulled my brakes and managed to avoid hitting them despite the fact that one of them was walking directly towards me and didn't move an inch. I nearly fell off the road trying to avoid her. After that I heard the same woman say "he shouldn't be on the footpath"

AITA for cycling on the footpath or should she have moved for me? ######

Response: YTA. Footpaths are for pedestrians. ######


Prompt:
I have two children with my ex, 8 and 7, I've been with my husband  for 6 years and we have a 3 year old together.

I used to live just down the road to my ex so he would pop by every day to see the children but then my partner got offered a promotion meaning we had to move, it's about 120miles away from where we were living originally.

We moved late last year and right now we are still figuring out custody, ex visits the weekends, usually staying in hotels,  and skypes every two days.

He's arguing that he wants the children for two weeks of the month and is willing to move to do so (he's put this on hold while his partner is pregnant) but to have them every two weeks he would have to pick them up at 5pm and the next morning leave to get them to school at 8;20, it would be too hard on the children.

The children have started to grow closer to my partner and further away from my ex, which isn't my fault, my partner *had* to move.

Well, he wanted to phone yesterday while the children were playing with their dad (my partner, their stepdad)  and when I asked them they said they didnt want to talk to him on the phone today, in the morning though if they could.

When I told this to my ex he went off on a huge rant about how I'm selfish because I moved them 120 miles away and how I should force them to talk to him on the phone, he has a right to talk to them etc and basically ended it by saying he will be pushing harder with the custody agreement and will be mentioning this.

AITA? ######

Response:
 YTA. First of all...why on earth would being picked up at 5pm then going to school the next morning be hard on your kids? Especially when it only happens every two weeks.

Second, your ex is going well out of his way to be there for his kids even though *you chose to move* them far away. You're refusing to split custody equally with him and not doing the least bit of anything to foster a close bond between him and the kids-- meanwhile he's spending every weekend in hotels to be near them. Telling them 'hey kids, time to take a break from playing to talk to dad' is literally the least you could do.

Stop it. You're being a huge asshole to your ex. ######


Prompt:
I (27M) got engaged recently to my girlfriend of five years (27F) and she was discussing wedding dress plans with me—we don’t have a date yet but she is a big planner. Coincidentally, my older sister (30F) also got engaged within a week of me, this is relevant for the rest of the story.

I was talking with my fiancé and she expressed to me how she’s kind of upset that she’s not close to any of her immediate family (they treated her quite badly) so she will not have any family heirlooms to wear on her wedding day. that’s when I got the idea—my grandmother’s wedding dress has never been worn since her wedding day, and she has always expressed wanting one of her grandkids to wear it (I remember she emphasized that this would be for one time because it would have to be altered and it’s a very delicate dress apparently)

I have no female cousins, and my own sister has always said to me she thought the dress was not modern enough/thought it was, in her own words, “extremely drab”, so I showed a picture to my fiancé and suggested it. My fiancé seemed thrilled at the idea of wearing it because she loves my grandma.

I asked my grandma for her permission—she then says that my sister also asked to wear the dress a day after I did??? Apparently my sister had a change of heart because she doesn’t want to go out shopping for dresses anymore, and decided she can just wear grandma’s dress.

Now Grandma and the rest of my family is in favor of my sister wearing the dress because she’s actually a grandkid, which I said was unfair and cruel. I just don’t see why my sister should wear something she previously was so rude about instead of my appreciate fiancé. AITA? ######

Response: YTA. First of all you don’t get to decide who wears the dress your grandma does. Second, your fiancé doesn’t get priority over your sister, that’s not the way it works. Third, it’s neither unfair nor cruel. ######


Prompt:
So i'm a "vampire"  (m15), and i'm friends with this girl from school (f15) and since we can't se eachother at school anymore, we talk via facebook.

I am very naturally pale and have colored my hair since age 12, and i mostly go out at night.

We were talking one day via facetime, and was asking me questions. She suddenly asked me "could i become a vampire myself?" and explained she also is a outsider and prefer being outside at night and loves goth music. Now, she's VERY dark and has a natural afro. I explained that vampires are usually pale and have long, straight black hair so not really. She got sad and her dad called me later and told me to apologize to her.
AITA? was i mean or racist? ######

Response: YTA. First of all I’m not even gonna comment on the fact that you’re a “vampire”. Secondly, why do you gotta be be rude and crush her imagination like that? Vampires are fake and can be whatever you want them to be. Why can’t they have dark skin and have an Afro? ######


Prompt:
Throwaway account because I think my kids might have seen Reddit on my phone.

I F40 have two kids, (F14) and (M11). When I married my husband, I discovered we had vastly different lifestyles. He ate junk food, I preferred to stay healthy. Unfortunately this has been a problem with our kids now.

My daughter eats pretty healthy, but enjoys junk food too, and is roughly five pounds overweight. (She’s 5’2 and 130 pounds, but is active) However my pediatrician has discussed some concern about it and suggested placing my daughter on a diet.

My son is not a healthy eater, he only likes junk food and does not eat healthy at all but has a fast metabolism and stays underweight.

I’ve started prohibiting my daughter from eating junk food, but not my son. My reasoning is that she needs to loose weight in order to deserve these sweets. She’s upset that her brother who eats worse/more than she does is allowed to continue eating sweets. Her reasoning is that because he eats more than her, does not play sports and just plays video games and is unhealthier when it comes to food choices means he should also have to eat healthy.

My husband has sided with her on this but my son hasn’t. My son has told her it’s only fair because he isn’t “fat”. (She’s not too chubby, but there’s a bit of extra weight around her stomach.)

After this, my husband has come to me saying I need to be nicer to her and make them both eat healthy because now my daughter is self conscious about her weight and is developing anxiety and an eating disorder. I don’t believe him though because a medical professional didn’t diagnose her. She’s fine, at least in my opinion.

TL/DR: My daughter is kind of overweight according to her doctor so I make her eat healthy but not her underweight bro it her.
AITA? ######

Response: YTA. First of all I find it extremely hard to believe that a pediatrician would express concern over just five pounds to the point that she needs to be on a diet. Second of all weight and health are extremely different. Just because your son is keeping the weight off doesn't mean he's healthy if he eats junk food all the time all the time. You should be teaching both your kids how to have a healthy lifestyle in terms of exercise and diet while still allowing themselves to enjoy snacks. Way to give your daughter a complex ######


Prompt:
Hello all! I'm in a bit of a pickle and am curious about your judgement.

I (M21)  recently was drinking with my flatmates, my girlfriend (F20) and a friend of one of my flatmates (let's call him "Ben"). Ben and I began talking-- we shared some great conversation, and after a while I became tired and went to bed with my GF. While we were getting ready for bed I remarked that, had I not been in a relationship, I probably would have hit on Ben a little bit. She was clearly quite hurt by this, told me that it suggested she wasn't enough and gave me the cold shoulder. Even after explaining that it was only a passing thought, I love her dearly, and do not feel anything for anyone else, sje still was deeply bothered by this.

Now, clearly I'm not going to do something like this again-- it makes my gf uncomfortable and it'd be wholly inconsiderate to just ignore that. However, is it a jerk move to tell your partner that you find someone attractive in passing? Is this just an individual boundary to respect? Is she uncomfortable with my bisexuality (something that I've told her about in the past)?

Thanks! ######

Response: YTA. Finding someone else attractive isn’t a bad thing. But saying if you wasn’t together you would of hit on him is an asshole move that was not needed. She probably feels so unworthy now. There was no need to remark this. ######


Prompt:
My sister (22f) was recently terminated from her sales clerk position. she worked enough hours to pay her bills and her share of rent with her roommate but had no savings. she's been a thorn in my side and the family's side this happening; crying, fits of anger, you get the idea

I have 2 kids, one who is on the spectrum (8m). the other is 5f. I've been searching and searching for a sitter/tutor to get some down time for myself. I saw this as a win win situation and offered my sister to watch my kids a few times the week. of course I wouldn't be able to pay her as much as she needed but it would be something to hold her over until she found something else.

before I can even get into it she rejects my offer. I try again a week later and again she says no. but of course she's whining to our parents about having no job. UM WHAT?! I finally call her out at the easter reunion saying I offered a job as a sitter/tutor and she rejected it so obviously she's not that desperate. she got snappy back and said yeah I want a real job, not working with your bratty, unbehaved kids so you can paint your nails and sit on your ass all day

I was livid and my husband had to get her out of the house before I did something rash. I text her later that day that I have no sympathy for the situation she PUT HERSELF INTO and have told my parents not to give her the slightest pity either. Her behavior is disgusting when all I was trying to do was help ######

Response: YTA. Everyone who has ever been unemployed knows how annoying it is when people feel you are required to accept every job offer that comes your way. She doesn't like babysitting, you weren't going to pay her what she needed, and the time she spent doing the "job" you offered (were you planning on giving her benefits? paying employer-side taxes?) could have interfered with her search for a legitimate job.  It's one thing if a perpetually unemployed person turns down every job they hear about, but this doesn't fit that bill and certainly wasn't worthy of you kicking her out of your house at Easter and telling all your family members not to be sympathetic to her situation. ######


Prompt:
Ok so I've met some pretty good liars in my life. I've been through horrible situations where people lied to me for months and now I'm generally skeptical of people until proven otherwise.

My bf on the other hand is an innocent until proven guilty type of guy and he prides himself on his honesty and loyalty. He trusts me entirely and never made me feel uncomfortable.

Well today it came out that I don't feel the same. I am actually uncomfortable with his 'no password sharing' policy and I do think he could either be a great, amazing person or an amazing liar. It just seems too convenient that someone who claims they never lie also has boundaries that mean I can never know whether or not they are lying.

So while I told him I clearly trust him enough to take that risk, I can't be 100% sure of things. He flipped out, told me I'm insulting him and his integrity,character etc. He said he did nothing to deserve being not trusted. I told him it's not him, just my past, I trust him mostly but I can't help feeling some doubt. He's now very upset, demands an apology and that I trust him entirely. I'm not sure I can do that. AITA? ######

Response: YTA. everyone deserves privacy. sharing passwords is really extreme and controlling ######


Prompt:
This was about a week ago. I got into a minor car accident at a crossroads, car was a bit fucked and I was a bit shaken up but obviously everything was absolutely fine. I was on my way to work so I got a taxi to work and texted my girlfriend telling her I’d been in a car crash but it was nothing serious, turned my phone off and got to work. I work in a hospital so the hours are pretty intense.

I’m not the best at using my phone, and because my girlfriend lives in the town we go to college in, about three hours away, we don’t get to see each other that much during the summer. I got home from my shift that night and went to sleep, forgetting to charge my phone. I had 12 hour shifts the next couple days so just forgot about what had happened because I was so tired and went to sleep the second I got home from my shift.

Three days after the accident my best friend turns up at my house asking what the fuck had happened and whether I was okay. I was super confused because I hadn’t mentioned it to anyone other than my girlfriend. He then shows me his phone and my girlfriend had been just spamming him asking what was going on and whether I was okay and apparently she got super worried, which I do get, but I literally told her it was nothing serious.

She’s now extremely pissed off at me and saying she can’t trust me anymore and that I’m unreliable but she’s the one who got herself worked up over nothing. AITA? ######

Response: YTA. Even ignoring the fact that you’re in a relationship and casually don’t speak to each other for 3 days, you dropped a car crash bomb and then didn’t follow up? ######


Prompt:
in my apartment complex, this little girl was doing the cliche, "lemonade, lemonade, come get your sweet lemonade!" thing and i decided to take a look since i want to become friendly with the neighbors.  We made pleasantries and the dad even gave me a plate of food to go!  i decided to make small talk with their daughter selling lemonade who apparently wanted to buy a pony with the money she collects from selling the juice.  Pipe dream, but she's a kid.  I buy into her fantasy and she asks for $2 a cup.  I give her $5 but she gave me another cup even though I told her I only wanted 1 and to keep the change :)

now i took a swig of that shit and unconsciously violently ejected that shit right the fuck back out of my mouth where it belongs.  I was actually kind of mad because she false advertised it as "sweet" lemonade, when that shit was as sour as a lemon fucking warhead.  Her parents should've seriously done some quality control, but that whole "she's just a little girl" mentality just made me drink ass juice for the very first time of my life.  My face scrunched up like wrinkled day old laundry and i immediately knew i fucked up when i saw the little girls face start to tear up.  I apologized, but it was too late and she started bawling.  I wanted to gtfo ASAP, but put the other cup back down and started to walk away.  She cried even harder and yelled, "you don't want the other one either?!?"  I heard the footsteps of her dad coming out and i just said, "Gotta go bye" and fast walked back to my room.

I'm anxious about running into them now, but that was probably more traumatic for my taste buds than it was for her.  I don't see the big deal.   AITA? ######

Response: YTA. Even chef Ramsey is nicer when it's a kid's attempt. ######


Prompt:
My wife and I have two children, 4, almost 5, and 6.

We’re expecting our third and final child in 3 weeks, her entire pregnancy was exhausting but it’s worse now that she’s closer to giving birth, she spent most of her pregnancy on bed rest as it’s high risk, it was the same with our youngest.

We had a family meal planned at ours but my wife told me she wasn’t ready for guests, I offered to stay at home but she said the children were excited so we rescheduled for the meal to happen at my mothers.

When I got there my sister asked where my wife was because apparently my mother had only told her that the meal was at hers now.

I said in a joking tone “Oh! She’s being lazy!”

When we got home my youngest went up to spend time with her mother and said “you’re lazy mummy” and then told her mother I said that, not in those exact words.

When I explained to my wife she was still angry telling me even in a joke I shouldn’t say things like that and that I’m being an asshole.

I don’t think I did anything that bad it was a joke?

AITA? ######

Response:
 YTA. Even as a joke this is a pretty insensitive thing to say to other people about your pregnant wife on bed rest.

Also, when your pregnant wife says you hurt her feelings, you apologize. Because you care about her feelings. You don't invalidate her and say "It's just a joke toughen up". Not okay. That's the path to abuse. ######


Prompt:
My brother just finished freshman year of college last month. He's going to community college first to save money and then transfer to a 4 year school. He hadn't decided on a major when he started, but he's picked one now.

I told him a few months ago that I have $5K I'm willing to give him for when he transfers to a 4 year school but my only condition is that his major has to be one that leads to a profitable job. I'm not talking "you have to be a doctor/lawyer" but more like "you need to be able to stand on your own two feet and not ask mom and dad for money".

He was going back and forth between Managerial Economics, Finance, or History. He decided on history.

I've sent him about a million articles showing how a lot of history majors are unemployed after graduating, about how hard it is to get a job, pressures of paying back student loans, etc. I've also talked to him about how much better life is when you have disposable income but he's just not hearing it.

I asked him what his career plan is from a history major, he says "I'll go to grad school for history too and then I'll figure something out"

History is not a major I'm willing to pay for. $5K is a lot for me to spend on a siblings education, I'm only 27, but now he's upset and saying that I'm controlling him. AITA? ######

Response:
 YTA. Either offer the money or don't, but don't dangle it in front of him with strings attached.

You're right, history might not be profitable. But at the same time, there's no guarantee that he'll find a well-paying job if he graduates with a business or engineering degree.

And honestly? It's better for him to go after a degree he enjoys and come out with student debt, than to feel forced into studying something he hates so that he can come out with a LITTLE less debt. You're acting like $5k is make-it-or-break it money -- but even two years at a public 4-year university is going to cost $20k or more. Your brother is likely going to graduate with student loans with or without your money, so sending him articles about the "pressures of paying back student loans" really doesn't mean much. ######


Prompt:
Ok so to begin this let's just call my mom and stepdad my parents because that's easier and almist correct anyway. My parents are in their 30s so it's not unexpected that they still do it.

Last night I woke up in the middle of the night at like 01 or something. I didn't check but it was late. I obviously got out of my room and while walking by my parents room our cat started scratching tveir door.

I opened it for the cat but the cat didn't wanna go and instead hesitated. The lights were out in their room but I did feel like something was off. Soon after I heard my stepdad saying: "Close the fucking and let me have some privacy to fuck my wife. You always stay up late and walk in so I don't have any privacy in my own room!"

I apologized and pushed the cat in with my foot and got the glass of water and went back to my room and to sleep. ######

Response: YTA. Dude. Dont open your parents door without their ok. It's common sense and respecting their privacy. ######


Prompt:
Using an old throwaway for this. My sister is pregnant and announced the name of her baby on Facebook. She told our family group chat the gender but didn't mention anything about his name.

The problem is that it is the same name of my ex boyfriend who I dated for 4 years. We ended on pretty bad terms and my family saw the worst of it. I called my sister and confronted her about the name. She said it was on her list before I even started dating my ex, and that I should be over him by now.

That's when I started yelling at her and called her a bitch. Typically when we fight, it gets really nasty - the longest fight we had was a month. She then said i am no longer going to be her sons godmother and to not contact her anymore until she gives birth (she is only five months along)

I genuinely think that if she cared about me, she would ask how i felt before announcing it on Facebook. Its not so much the name reminding me of my ex, but the fact that she didn't even ask me beforehand. BTW the name is not very common (a cultural name) so she clearly knew how i would react

So, AITA for overreacting? I know this situation sounds petty but i just don't understand how I can be in the wrong for this. ######

Response: YTA. Dude, come on. The world does not revolve around you. You had a shitty relationship with a shitty dude, it happens to a lot of us. Stop giving that name power in your life. Let go of that relationship. If you had already this name bullshit wouldn’t be in issue. ######


Prompt:
Me - 30 year old man

Her - 26 year old woman

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Me and my girlfriend has been together for 8 years, and our relationship is nontraditonal. I've taught her about the universe, freedom and i've told her that i think marriage is a trap and having kids is not a good future. We still hang out and make love, but don't talk to eachother in baby voices or walks in the park while kissing.

I personally hate mushy relationships, and have hate on Romantic Comedies. I feel a burning despise when i see young couples kissing like they're making a baby in public.

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Recently, when we where watching a romance movie that was going on TV, i saw her sighing. There was a scene were a man and a woman were on a romantic picnic.  She said "Do you want to go one of those sometime?". I though she was joking, and jokingly said back in a baby-voice "sure, honeybuns."

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Next day, she wakes me up wearing a sundress and has made tons of sandwitches that she's put in a basket. I've always made fun of romantic people, and i thought she was taking the joke further and started laughing without control.

She got confused and asked me why i was laughing. I understood she wasn't joking and told her it's a little unusual and mushy to do a morning picnic. She got upset.

AITA ######

Response: YTA. dude you've got some issues. if seeing people happy and in love makes you feel "a burning despise" that's a you problem. they're not hurting anyone, you are. you hurt your GF's feelings by making a comment that caused her to put a lot of effort into a nice outing, and then LAUGHING at her for it. ######


Prompt:
So I 26 M have a brother, 31 M. Hes been married to his wife for a few years. For context, we are Thai and his wife is Kenyan. When the family found out his wife was expecting, we were all happy.

But the baby is 10 months old and I find it shocking how I’m the only one to see this. The baby does not look like my brother. The baby has hazel eyes that look green sometimes (both parents have brown) and dark brown hair (both parents have jet black hair). His skin resembles my brothers but that’s about it. He looks Latino or European, not Asian or black.

Having colored eyes and brown hair are NOT Asian or black features. How can two people will dominant features have a child come out that way? It doesn’t make sense. I suspect my sister in law cheated on my brother with a white man. It makes more sense for a black and white baby to have colored eyes and hair than an Asian and black one.

I told my brother my suspicions. He blew up on me for questioning the foundation of his marriage, literally SCREAMING of what I’m accusing his wife of, how him and his son both have one dimple only on their right cheeks and that when you mix interracially your children can come out looking like anything. How his wife has an Arab  grandparent so old genes could’ve popped up.

I told him his wife has him under her spell and anyone can see the baby doesn’t look like him. Our parents (who are kind of racist towards black people) are ecstatic the baby looks European and doesn’t look black so they don’t care. My brother has now blocked me. It’s been two weeks and he hasn’t reached out. I just think a test wouldn’t hurt. AITA? ######

Response: YTA. Dude he’s right, genetically mixed kids can come out all kinds of ways. But even further, this just isn’t your business and I find it suspicious the way you said his wife’s got him under a spell. It seems like you might have other reasons for not liking her and are grasping at this. ######


Prompt:
GF wanted to watch a movie I am not interested in. She ask a few times and I give in. I purchase the movie because it one of those In theater movies. Now I will say I am the type of you tell me let’s watch a movie, we watch a movie no phones, no distractions same way I’ve watch movie with my kids. That being said she’s on her phone, so I am like really.

We have already had a discussion about it, I was clear if we are spending time together then it’s just that. So am I the asshole for getting up turning on my computer and gaming with my daughter that’s on the west coast. She asked me if I was coming back and I just ignored it.

If I’m in the wrong let me know. ######

Response: YTA. Don’t know if you didn’t realize this but you’re literally comparing your GF to your children. You’re adults, stop being controlling. ######


Prompt:
It made me feel like he doesn’t trust me. We live together and spend most days together and he knows all there is to know about me. I understand that people come from things they don’t like talking about; I was abused for several years of my life (which we’ve discussed in detail). But, it seems like he doesn’t care to share and connect on the same level as I have done.

*****
It’s a quarter shaped scar on the top of his wrist and he’s a rather hairy man so I just saw it today whilst holding his hand in mine and kissing it. It looked like a rough scar and I had just asked out of curiosity what happened. His response was “I don’t want to talk about it.”
I prodded a bit asking if it was something sexual since he has been rather promiscuous in his past, to which he replied “No.” and again stating he didn’t want to talk about it. I haven’t continued asking but told him how I felt on the matter. His response was that of silence initially and then later he came to tell me he loved me.

I feel like I may be in the wrong here for feeling as if he doesn’t trust me with the details of his past. But keep in mind that this is a man that talks about marrying me and our future children and seems wholly committed to all that we are. Am I wrong to believe that if you are into a relationship for the long run that your past doesn’t have to stay hidden? I’m afraid he somehow has negative beliefs about what my my reaction will be to what happened though I try to make him feel safe and comfortable in who he is. Am I failing somehow?

He’s a very loving man that cares for me greatly. I just feel shut out of his life and untrusted at this point. ######

Response: YTA. Don't take something seemingly traumatic that happened to him and make it about yourself. If he ever wants to talk about it, great; if he doesn't, let it go. The more you push, the less he will ever trust you to talk about it. ######


Prompt:
So I'm happily married and the father of two boys. My poor wife lives in a house with a lot of testosterone. She's always taught our boys that girls don't fart, which I think is silly and if she doesn't let up they are going to be very disappointed by their future wives someday. Also I think she just needs to relax about it. We're all human.

Anyway I was playing around on my phone last night and had a brilliant idea. I knew I wasn't going to sleep well, so I figured I'd just keep the phone handy and when she began to fart in her sleep I'd get some video evidence. It's never just once, but like a lot of little ones, so I got a pretty good video and showed it to the kids over breakfast.  Obviously being 5 and 7 year old boys they thought it was hilarious and kept making jokes all day. I did tell them to tone it down after a while.

My wife is furious. We've always been a fun couple and I really didn't expect this reaction, but she says it was humiliating. I apologized, got the kids to stop, and stopped threatening to upload it to Facebook, but I really think this is a massive overreaction. So AITA? ######

Response: YTA. Don't pretend this is about teaching your sons anything positive about women. If this post wasn't enough proof, your history certainly is. ######


Prompt: I am an IT professional currently working from home and my wife is an ER doctor working on the frontline. We try to work the same hours, so I don’t see why this should be different just because I’m at home and she isn’t. She, on the other hand, comes home, gets annoyed when some chores aren’t done and then even more annoyed when I point out that if she doesn’t feel like doing them after her work, why would she assume I would do it after mine? Is it fair that household chores are 50:50 or should I be doing more because I’m working from home? ######

Response: YTA. Doing 8 hours in the comfort of your own home is a lot easier than 8 hours of working + daily commute + working on the frontline as a doctor during a global pandemic. You should be doing more than half the chores. ######


Prompt:
My daughter has always been that smart kid who relies purely on that to go from grade to grade. She never does her home, never pays attention in class and studies the very morning of a test. Miraculously she still good enough marks in all he subjects except for history.

A couple months ago she had an essay coming up and I spoke to her and said that she needs to do a whole a lot better in it than she did in her last history test (37%). She blew me off so I told her that if she didn't at least get above 55% I was going to give her dog away to the boy next door. Still she didn't take me seriously but agreed that she'll even get an 80. We laughed about it and when the results came back she got 78%. We laughed about it and took her out for a celebratory lunch out with her father.

Today I was cleaning up in her room and found this box filled with old papers and tests from the previous year. After looking through a few I saw an essay which looked familiar. I read it and felt that there was something off so I took it and asked my daughter if I could re read her one. They were almost identical. When I confronted her about it she lied and said it was her first draft. Finally at the end she said it was Debbie's (an older friend of hers) who wrote it for the same assignment a couple years back. I did get upset and shouted at her before she went off to her room.

So I took her dog and went next door to give it to our neighbors. She's been crying ever since and her father is calling me an asshole but I feel like she needs to understand that there are consequences for every action. Am I the asshole? ######

Response: YTA. Dogs are pets and part of the family. They aren't punishments. Find a different way to punish her. You are punishing the dog too and it didn't do anything wrong. ######


Prompt:
My daughter is currently in 9th grade and is attending one of the best public schools in this country. I am so proud of her and it breaks my heart to know that I will have to change it by next year. The problem with this school is that although it excels in education, it's a really non-religious school so to speak. What I mean by that is, religion is not taught at all and students have too much freedom (little restrictions on what they can't do).

I had no problem with that because I can teach her religion at home and I trust her not to be too friendly with the guys.

Yesterday, my husband and daughter had a massive argument. He caught my daughter talking to a guy on the phone who was clearly flirting with her and she liked it. My daughter told him that they are just friends and foolishly admitted that when she goes out with her friends, they include the guys (I do let her do that but without my husbands knowledge). Because of this, my husband is considering installing some tracking and other privacy devices on her phone and will change her school by next year. I am against invading my daughters privacy so I will try to convince him not to do that , but I do think changing her schools to a more religious one is the right decision. I am really worried about her future by staying here. When she heard the news she was heartbroken and did not speak to us all day. Do you think I'll be in the wrong by changing her schools? ######

Response: YTA. Do you really think that forcing her to change schools will keep her away from boys? Come on. She wasn't even doing anything wrong. ######


Prompt:
About a month and a half ago my 21 year old nephew lost his job due to the pandemic and then was illegally evicted from his apartment (he wasn't on the lease and his friend kicked him out so there's nothing that can be done). He was planning to move in with his girlfriend who lives in another state but that is not possible until the end of this month. He called me and asked if he could stay at my place for a month because he literally had nowhere else to go. I agreed but with one rule: he has to buy his own food and cannot eat any of ours. I have three kids to feed and I can't afford it.

At first everything was fine but of course he eventually ran out of money. Our state's unemployment office is taking forever with his claim and no one will hire him since he's moving out of state. There have been a few times where I let him have some of our leftovers and I cooked for his birthday, but usually he has to find something on his own. I'm not going to lie, there are quite a few days where he goes with little to no food. But like I said, I just can't afford to feed him.

Yesterday I went and bought chinese food for me and my boyfriend and some burgers for the kids. That night I noticed that some of my food was missing and I know it wasn't the kids because they don't like it. I'm honestly fed up at this point. I've been letting him stay here and I told him not to eat our food.

I've talked to one of my friends about this and she says that I'm being an asshole by letting him go hungry. I don't agree because I told him he would have to buy his own food and I can't afford another person to feed.

AITA? ######

Response: YTA. Do you make him sleep in the cupboard under the stairs as well? ######


Prompt:
I think it sounds a lot worse than it is.

I never promised them anything. I told them I would only put in a good word for them with her but it was ultimately up to her, and that is all I did. I didn't harass her or beg her to go out with any of these guys. I would just say "Alex is a cool guy and I think you'd like him."

This worked fine until one guy got mad because she rejected him and tanked the whole thing by telling her what was happening. Then she told our parents.

My parents told me that was I did disgusted them, and they want me to return all the money I made. My sister feels the same way. I told them I wouldn't give it back because I didn't do anything wrong since I didn't nag her to go out with them and they obviously felt like the money was worth it.

AITA? ######

Response: YTA. Do you care at all about what your sister wants? I know you said you didn’t push her but even suggesting she date someone just because the paid you is highly unethical. ######


Prompt: I (28f) have trouble with social interactions. Some time I say things with a tone that sounds really rude without realizing it. I think I'm being playful or helpful given the situation. My husband (30m) has only recently told me that I do this and thats why people get upset with me so often. I was upset that he hadn't told me sooner (we have been together 11 years) but I got over that part and asked him to correct me at the time I do it to help me realize when I am and to apologize for it. He has not been doing it. He tells me after the fact like when we get in the car or get home. The last time we were in Wal-Mart and the cashier seemed New and was having trouble doing something on the register. I have worked for the company for 6 years now so I understand how hard it can be at the register. I thought I was trying to be nice and explained what she was doing wrong after she was getting frustrated. She had gotten mad at me for it. As we were leaving my husband told me I was rude for telling her how to do her job and my tone. I got mad and asked why he didn't tell me at the time. He said he didn't wanna start a scene. Am I the Asshole for yelling at him in the car for not helping me fix my people problem? ######

Response: YTA. Do you -really- want him interrupting you to tell you you're acting like a jerk? I'm sure that sounds nice after the fact, but that never works. You need to learn to reflect on your behavior and change it for next time. ######


Prompt:
My girlfriend is 21F and I am 36F.

We live together and because she has no relationship with her controlling, abusive parents, I offered to pay her college tuition.

She’s a sophomore, and right now is taking summer courses. Last weekend, I had a work emergency in another state and was stressed out.

I told my girlfriend I wanted her to come with me. She said no, she needed to study for her exam the next day, and that she can’t focus on planes.

I ended up going on the trip alone and was resentful because I was in Las Vegas of all places and I felt she didn’t even care like a normal partner would that I would be surrounded with so many sources of temptation.

Yesterday, the university posted their bill for next semester. I told her that I didn’t know if I wanted to pay it.

She got super upset, but I reminded her that I didn’t have to pay any of it and that I felt like she obviously not appreciating me like she used to.

Since then, she’s been throwing a mini tantrum which has included raiding the wine cellar and not answering me when I ask why she’s drinking except to say “ I’m sad.”

AITA? ######

Response: YTA. Did you take lessons from her abusive, controlling parents? ######