Prompt:
I’ve been sitting on this for a while, I haven’t yet told my husband and don’t really want to in respect for my daughters privacy. However I do need some help.

Two weeks ago I asked my daughter if I could use her phone, as my internet was sketchy. She obliged and handed it to me. She obviously had forgotten what she’d left up, as when I went on the internet, it was left on a fetish website (fetlife).

I was honestly shocked and in my shock I’m ashamed to say I snooped through her profile. Not only has she posted inappropriate photos of herself, there’s also hundreds of messages from men, mainly older, either asking her to meet or wanting to talk about fantasies.

Not comfortable to look through the messages about her fantasy’s, I couldn’t help but see messages where she’d already arranged and met up with men. All different ages. The oldest one was 54!!! I’m shocked, she was always well behaved and quite introverted, so I’m still reeling from the discovery.

I know my daughter is an adult but is there a way for me to sit her down and talk about her behaviour without me coming across as an asshole. I know I invaded her privacy but I’m now very worried about her.

She lives at home but her father and I don’t control her life, she’s free to go where and when she wants. Having said that I only asked in return she lets me know where she is. If she wants to spend a week at her friends, that’s absolutely fine. I just like to know she’s okay. But with her keeping this from me and lying about her whereabouts, she’s meeting strange men from the internet for sex. This whole thing is sketchy and as much as she is an independent young women, I feel she needs guidance with this. ######

Response: YTA for snooping in the beginning and you ABSOLUTELY would be the asshole for telling her you saw it. Don’t bring it up it’ll make things even more uncomfortable for you as well as her. As you said, she’s old enough, you don’t control her. What’s done is done, move on. ######


Prompt:
My husband and I are selling our house, and we were touring a woman and her husband who are getting ready to start a family. They offered a full cash offer, and it was right at what we were selling the house for, however, they were talking about making so many renovations. For example, the wife looked in the kitchen and said “I wish there was an island in here, but we can figure that out”, there are 2 smaller bedrooms in the home right next to each other and she talked about knocking the wall down to make one big room.

The whole time I just felt upset because this was the home my parents built and my kids grew up in and I made sure to never make significant changes because   I did not want to destroy their hard work. When they were leaving I said we’ll keep in touch ,  I called the couple later that night and told them we’ll be moving on to a different buyer. I  told my husband that I’m not interested in them purchasing our home. He thought I was joking until I explained my reasoning. He said I was too attached to this house, and that If I was going to have so many specifications on the buyer then he’s going to choose himself.

He called the couple back today and they said they found a new house but to thank the both of us. He was livid. He started going off about how it’s taken so long for us to find someone to actually pay the full price, especially with a full cash offer, but now we’re either going to have to settle or wait forever to get a buyer like that.

I told him no amount of money is going to make me okay with the destruction of my childhood home. Now he’s angry, and won’t talk to me, unless he absolutely has to

AITA? ######

Response:
 YTA for several reasons.

1. you're selling the house so you clearly don't care enough to preserve it in its original state.
2. you will probably never see the inside of the house once it's sold, so it literally doesn't matter what changes get made
3. you gave up a huge financial opportunity for your family because you were emotionally attached to the house, without even consulting your husband. This one really makes you an AH. ######


Prompt:
My wife and I are both 19. We have known each other since kindergarten and have been dating for many years. We got married last year.

Together, we have 3 year-old twins, a girl and a boy.

I joined the army 2 years ago. We are living in subsidized housing on the base. My wife currently stays at home to take care of the kids and does freelance writing as well. She mainly writes children books and she earns a small amount of income from the royalties. Before the worldwide pandemic she also made income from flipping houses.

My wife is very intelligent and she was always the top of her class, while I didn’t do well in school. Ultimately she wants to get a bachelor’s degree and pursue her dream of becoming a lawyer.

I want to support her the best I can, but even if she attends the university near the base, it will still be difficult to juggle taking care of the kids and getting a degree. Plus, if she goes to university, she will have less time for writing, and then we have to rely on my income alone.

She told me that she wants to study for  economics degree next year. I told her that it’s not feasible and that she should at least wait until our kids are in school (in 2 more years). She was quite upset and said I don’t care about her dreams and that she can’t be a housewife forever. I told her Im not forcing her to be a housewife, it’s just that the time is not right at the moment for her to pursue higher education.

We all had to make sacrifices...I didn’t want to join the military but it was the best option for us because it meant my family can have a stable life and housing.

AITA here? ######

Response: YTA for saying no instead of asking her to show you a plan of how it would work practically, both in terms of child care and budget. ######


Prompt:
My dad's GF recently got promoted at work and I was forced by my dad to give her a gift (some expensive perfume she wanted) and a card. In the card, I wrote, "Hey [First Name], congrats on the promotion! You totally deserve it, and thanks for making my dad happy and for taking care of my brother and him. Good luck with your new role!"

While I was working on something for summer school, she came in and thanked me for the card and the gift. After I submitted the assignment, she rubbed my back and played with my hair and said she wanted a closer relationship with me for the 138th time in my life. I told her for the millionth time that I wasn't interested in one, and she looked hurt and told me that she just wanted me to know that she was there for me and just wanted to spend time with me.

I apologized and said that summer school and my startup were making me very busy and that maybe she could redirect her efforts towards my brother or spend more time with my dad or something. I told her to spend more time with my dad so that she can be a mom to her own kid.

Unfortunately, my dad joined us and said that I needed to start making more effort in a relationship with her because they were getting serious and he also chewed me out for the sex comment. Even IF that were actually the case, they can still get married and she doesn't have to bond with me.

AITA in this situation? ######

Response:
 YTA for repeatedly posting about your dad’s gf. She sounds like a nice and caring person, and you sound like a dramatic, annoying teen trying to be edgy.

This one:
https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/h97l4s/aita_for_telling_my_dad_that_i_want_to_move_in/

And this one:
https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/h7ssvu/aita_for_telling_my_dads_girlfriend_that_i_dont/

Pretty sure this one too:
https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/gx0l0l/aita_for_telling_my_dads_gf_that_she_is_not_and/?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share ######


Prompt:
A bit of background: I was involved in a bit of bad stuff. Let's say I did some illegal things. Like "sell sweets". But one day I got caught and got taken to prison. This was around the time my son was born. Now my wife was scared for her life and divorced me and moved out of the house we lived in.

Now I had come out of prison after serving my time and I was struggling for a job. Until I found a good role l that was tailored to me. It was going around the country to schools and explain to them the consequences of "selling sweets". Eventually after a year I got back on my feet and felt confident enough to  tell my wife I was a changed man. I was feeling excstatic over the thought of seeing my son.

So I did what anyone would do, I searched her name on Facebook and went through so many profiles until I found her. I knew to not contact her as she would shut me down straight away. So I found her brother and contacted him. I told him what I was up to and told him I changed. He believed me and eventually I got to speak to my wife. She understood that I wanted to be in my sons life, so she told me to come over.

First we met in a restaurant, as she didn't trust me fully. I was happy I got to see my son for the first time in 15 years. I teared up a little. But he was being cold to me. And after we finished she told me to come to her house. But on the way to her house my son screamed to my wife. That I was a random she got of the streets and I can fuck off. I wasn't in his life for 15 years and he can survive without me. That I was a pathetic excuse for a father.

I let myself out of the car and I booked a hotel on the spot. So reddit AITA? ######

Response: YTA for reaching out for the wrong reasons. Did you have any feelings of remorse or guilt over what you put your ex-wife (the reason for calling her your wife even though you're divorced is a bit creepy)? You made her scared for her life and also for her (at that time) baby's. You made no mention of what you wanted to say to her, start paying child support etc. And did you honestly think a teenager would welcome a father that hasn't been there his whole life and spent more than a decade in jail for 'selling sweets' with open arms? I say work more on proving that you're a changed man to your ex-wife and son because your post shows that you're focused on what you want. ######


Prompt:
I am planning to go away this weekend to the mountains with my girlfriend. My wife and I have already agreed to end our marriage, but we have not told our daughter yet.

My wife knows I am seeing someone and about the trip. She doesn't agree with what I am doing and feels neither of us should date until we're officially separated at the least, but that's not really relevant to my question I guess.

The issue here is that my wife feels I am disrespecting her and our daughter by "stepping out" before we've had a chance to tell our daughter we're divorcing. She thinks the least I could do is not go on trips with my girlfriend until our family has had a chance to come to terms with the divorce and that by not waiting I am being selfish and putting my wants above the well being of our daughter, which makes me an asshole.

My wife thinks it is unfair and disrespectful to our daughter because she should have time to process this before she has to deal with a new woman being in her dad's life. I don't see this as an issue because I have no plans to bring my girlfriend into my life any time soon, but my wife worries about our daughter finding out somehow and then spiraling because of the shock of a divorce and new relationship.

I don't think everything my wife has said is unreasonable, but life goes on and can't be stopped because the timing is far from idea. There's no guarantee how our daughter will react. She may never be okay with me seeing someone else or going away with them, so postponing the trip doesn't make any sense to me. I also give less weight to m wife's views because she's been the one wanting to delay telling our daughter, so it isn't fair to then hold my life hostage until she's ready.

This trip has nothing to do with her or our daughter, and it has no affect on either of them. Why would I be the asshole for going away for the weekend when our marriage is over and as far as I am concerned it's really none of their business anyway.

AITA? ######

Response: YTA for putting more energy into a brand new relationship than you are into your daughter’s well being. You’re presumably still living in the house with your family, and your soon to be ex wife is right that it will destroy your daughter if she happens to find out you have a girlfriend. ######


Prompt: We'll call her Liz. Liz has been staying with us for several weeks. I told her the main rules were no politics, no drugs, and occasional rent. I have yelled at her several times for bringing up race and it has caused her and my family to act somewhat strange. Everything came to a head this morning. I was giving her a ride to work and listening to the mighty mighty bosstones. She started droning on about how a lot of the album was about racial issues. I finally lost it and told her to just shut up. She then called me a f***** and made fun of me for just keeping the same song on repeat. I don't think she really understands the genre, personally. I'm just sick of her constantly complaining while I feed her and give her a lifeline. You try to be a nice guy and it always fucking backfires. I can't even listen to the mighty mighty bosstones without feeling awkward anymore. It's my house, so I wanted my rules. AITA? ######

Response: YTA for putting a song on repeat with someone else (over 5) in the car. ######


Prompt:
 I married my husband 2 years ago and my relationship with my stepson (12) has never been well. We tried everything but nothing seems to work. His behavior towards me is so terrible, he shouts at me, swears me, and calls me worst “mother” ever.

His 13th birthday is tomorrow and since my daughter (7F) birthday is only 10 days apart we usually celebrate them both in the same day (they are fine with it). I asked my stepson who he has invited and that's when he facepalms me and tells me that he has already answered this question before in the worst tone ever. This is where I lost it and told him that because of his attitude I am going to cancel his birthday tomorrow. At first he didn’t believe me since it’s not the first time I intend to punish him without actually doing it in the end. But this time I was serious, and to prove it to him I called his grandparents and told them his birthday got cancelled. He started crying begging me not to cancel but I told him it’s too late.

I got berated by his grandparents because of this and told me that I don’t have the rights to cancel his birthday. As his mother I am pretty sure I can do what I want though but they weren’t listening to me. They even told me that tomorrow they are coming to his birthday with the gifts even after I told them not to bother because I won’t open the door.

AITA here? ######

Response: YTA for overreacting and for thinking that combining their birthdays is remotely OK for kids that age (even more so in a reconstituted family situation) ######


Prompt:
Hello, Reddit. I (47M) have been saving for my daughter's (18F) college education ever since she was born. I don't feel comfortable disclosing the exact amount, but it was enough to send her to a  good university, buy all of her supplies, etc. My wife and I both went to college, and we were expecting our daughter to go as well. So you can imagine our disappointment when she told us that she wasn't going. However, we respected her wishes and didn't make a big deal. The day after she told us, I bought a boat. My wife and I have been wanting one for years now, and so I finally bought it. It cleared out most of our daughters college fund, and we put the rest in savings. A few days pass, and we hadn't told anyone about it. But my mother in law hosted a small family barbeque (in accordance with our state safety regulations concerning COVID.) and it eventually came up in conversation. My daughter was there, and when we said that we bought a boat, she asked where the money came from. So we answered, and she absolutely lost it. She said that she had changed her mind and was going to announce it today, but now she can't go since we spent it.

The family is torn. My wife doesn't think that I'm an AH, but my daughter obviously does. The in-laws and other relatives are split over it. So tell me, Reddit, AITA? ######

Response:
 YTA for not thinking things through. You waited less than 24 hours before you bought a boat with the college fund. Wait six months, a year. I mean two of my kids took a gap year before college, which they actually found very helpful.

Plus things are a literal mess right now and it is really hard for college Freshman to make decisions. I have one kid who is an incoming Freshman. School is shut down. Everything is happening through email in terms of enrollment and the wait times are long for responses.

Like I said, you should have given it some time. It seems like you just couldn't wait to spend the money you supposedly set aside for your child. ######


Prompt:
I live with two roommates. Nobody owns the house, we rebt from a local woman. They recently got a dog with her permission. I told them I absolutely didn't want a dog, but was outvoted. They agreed to the following rules.

1. The dog does not go on my floor of the house for any reason. I just think dogs are dirty, and I do not want hair on or near my things.

2. I do not do any dog care. I didn't want the dog. I'm incredibly busy, and almost always on a tight schedule. The dog isn't my problem, and it will not affect my life.

3. The dog stays in their crate if my roommates aren't home. I don't trust them to get a decent dog, and I don't want to be looking around every corner.

One month later, my roommates disregard the 3rd rule, and their untrained dog runs wild. I was leaving for work today, and as I opened the door to leave, the dog nearly knocks me over (blech) and jumps out the door and Usain Bolt's to freedom. I just locked the door behind me and left. As I said before, I'm on a tight schedule, and when I'm going, I have to GO. I wasn't able to text my roommates about it until I got to work, and they apparently are pissed that I just let him go. They are at work and their parents' house, and nobody has started looking yet.

I don't think this is on me. I told them I didn't want a dog. I told them my terms. I had to go and didn't even have a minute to spend, let alone the hours I'm sure they expected me to put in. AITA? ######

Response: YTA for not texting them right away. You're not obligated to look for it, but I don't believe at all you didn't have 20 seconds to spare to text them about the situation and letting them know 30 minutes-an hour after the fact seriously endangered that dog's life. It doesn't deserve to be hit by a car because you couldn't bother taking 2 seconds to say "hey the dog got out, come home". If they didn't come looking for it that's completely on them but not telling them right away is absolutely on you. ######


Prompt:
It’s a cheap house I want to invest in.  Owned by the state currently.  I’m doing inspections now, if report ok (I expect some work but ok as in I can afford fixes) I’ll buy cash and fly out and start the renovations.  Probably just rent it out but I want it to be nice enough to rent so it’s not probably cheap in total but cheap enough for me to start the process.  Hell, I might wipe out my savings but I see it to be a big risk big reward and I have the hair up my ass to do it.

While my own family of origin is really excited for me and even wants to help me because they’re bored, my spouses family thinks we should help them because they’re not working.

Wtf.  I’m just going to be honest and blatant and vulgar.  So be aware of profanity

Fuck those lazy ass people.  I have never known them to do anything but be mooches and I could give a shit less. “Because they’re not working” they never work or they work quit work quit.  TF does that have to do with me?

The kicker? My wife warned me about bringing this shit up to them.  I didn’t even think about it when I said it.  Now when she talks to them she puts the phone on speaker and it’s all “woe is me, I need I need” and she just looks at me like, I blame you.

Anyway maybe I’m an asshole.  You can determine but either way.  Fuck them. Like they could really become homeless for real and I’m not giving them shit because I’ve seen them not help themselves so long it wouldn’t surprise me. ######

Response: YTA for not listening to your wife. Now you both have to pay the price for your big mouth. Learn from this. ######


Prompt:
We moved in together recently, and we've been having a conflict over whether or not I should learn how to do her clothes.

I never learned how to do more than a basic wash because none of my clothes require it. I wash everything together unless it's a new shirt and might bleed or it's my workout clothes, but even then I still wash on warm or cold so at most I do two loads and do no real sorting. I dry clean my suits and work clothes. I've done this now for well over a decade and it's worked without a problem.

The problem is that this method doesn't work for her clothes since they are much more sensitive to the water temperature and drying method than mine.

She wants me to learn how to wash her clothes too but I refused. I don't think I should have to learn how to wash her clothes. She can wash hers and I'll do my own. She then asked what happens if she's sick. I think that's a dumb question because obviously in the past it's not been a problem when she lived alone, but worst case I have them dry cleaned. It's not that expensive and fixes the problem.

The solutions I've proposed make sense to me, but she thinks I am being an asshole for refusing to learn how to take care of her things, which I don't understand. ######

Response: YTA for not even bothering to learn. She’s right, what happens when you’re too sick to do your chores? Will you expect her to pick up after you?  You’re a grown adult, it’s time to act like one. ######


Prompt:
So my ex husband and I divorced a little over a year and a half ago, and I started dating someone else. I got with him and since he had been around our daughter while we were just friends, I didn't think much of it. I let my ex know that I was dating this person and that they were around our child since it had been fine before. He exploded, said how dare I without introducing them etc.
They had met a few times before, so I was confused but I arranged for them to meet anyways.
They met, it went shockingly well.
Well my ex husband has had a revolving door of girlfriends, I think hes on his 8th now, and I've never met a single one of them and he brought them around our child. I dont really care about it, but he made a rule and didnt follow it. (Double standards are his bread and butter, loves them)
Well I'm poly and recently got a second partner. I've been with them for a few months and they love kids so I'm planning on introducing my kid to her next week.
I let my ex know and he asked when he would be meeting her. I said he wasnt. (The 2nd partner knows about my ex husband and how he is because her sister dated him and she refuses to meet him)
I refuse to cater to his double standards anymore but my parents say I'm the asshole, I just dont see it. ######

Response: YTA for not enforcing the rule and then pretending like he's the only one with a double standard. ######


Prompt:
My wife and I recently moved to a new city. I took a job with a higher salary, enabling my wife to stay home with our children. We didn't want to do virtual ed, so she is also homeschooling.

Before moving my wife was working from home full time and was sick of her job. Being without a job was a relief for her.

A few months after moving my wife's former employer contacted her and asked if she would work 10 hours per week from home. They really needed her.

She said yes, and I supported this decision, but was a little wary that it would turn into more than 10 hours.

Well now, she is working about 25 hrs a week from home, trying to homeschool children and take care of 1 year old. She frequently works in the afternoon and puts the kids in front of the tv( which I don't really love). Or works from 8-10:30pm.

AITA for not supporting her in this? She is upset with me because I have animosity towards her work. I don't blow up at her or anything but there is a definite tension.

She says it doesn't affect me because she does it when im at work or at night. But she is constantly tired and seems overworked to me.

Aita??? ######

Response: YTA for not doing anything to help your wife! If "she is constantly tired and seems overworked" why aren't you trying to help her rather than criticize? Why is it only up to her to change, not you? ######


Prompt:
 I did not include it because she not her mother. Yes. she is her stepmother, but my daughter doesn't call her mom, momma or anything like that unless she is sick, but they have a good relationship and are very close.

So when I had the jewelry made I only included my son's birth date and stone, nothing for my daughter.

I expected my wife to be excited when I gave it to her, but she seemed confused. I asked if something was wrong and she told me they had forgotten to include the date and stone for my daughter and we'd have to get it fixed. I told her that it was intentional because I thought she would just want it for our son since she's not my daughter's mother.

That was the wrong thing to say. She told me that it was her daughter even if it was only through marriage and I was a jerk for thinking otherwise. She then demanded that I have it sent back and fixed.

I don't know if I want to fight her on this as far as fighting over whether or not we should include my daughter on the bracelet, but even if I should have included her, I don't think I can be blamed for not doing it. How was I supposed to know she would want it or I should include it? I may be ignorant, but I don't think I AITA. Am I? ######

Response: YTA for not considering your daughters feelings in this decision. Even though it was a piece of jewelry for your wife, your daughter would still see her wearing it and could feel that you and your wife don't think she's important enough to celebrate. I'm glad your wife corrected it before your daughter found out. ######


Prompt:
It's literally 5 minutes of music and 5 minutes of commercials. I don't understand it, so I asked my roommate why she got a radio when she can just get Spotify. She said, "Because I wanted to." I asked her again because that isn't really a valid answer. She said that again. I asked her once again, to which she says, "I'm the only one listening to it, so it doesn't matter." I told her she was being defensive for no reason, and she went on about how she doesn't owe me a reason for buying things, and that it'd be pointless to explain radio because "nobody ever understands" (is she 14?).

AITA? I feel like the fact that she can't even give me a logical answer just says she knows I have a good point, but you can't ever ask her about her hobbies because she thinks she's being bullied. ######

Response:
 YTA for not accepting her answer and asking repeatedly because it wasn't enough info for you.

"you can't ever ask her about her hobbies because she thinks she's being bullied" guess what, you just made her insecurity worse. ######


Prompt: My Step daughter is 20 and recently single. She always has been a social butterfly to put it nicely. Her boyfriend left her over cheating rumours which I wouldn't doubt for a second. My husband and I don't share the same views and she's his little girl which is fair enough but I feel like she's too out there. She was only single for 2 weeks before hanging out with a new guy and I spoke to my husband about this and he told me to stay out of it and not say anything. I got angry at this as I liked her ex and I said she's became a slut ever since she turned 18. My husband is pissed I said this. AITA or is he overreacting ######

Response:
 YTA for multiple reasons.

1) she's an adult and can do what she likes. You don't get to criticise her for choosing to date after a break up.

2) you went to your husband and complained, as if he was going to tell her to change. What the hell? How did you think the conversation "hey darling, I think your daughter is too promiscuous and needs to change as a person" was going to go down? Obviously he was going to be upset with you.

3) calling her a "slut" is disgusting. A woman is allowed to enjoy sex without being criticised. If it was a step son instead, would you still criticise him for finding a new partner? Slut-shaming is a gross result of a misogynistic society, and if you really cared about your step daughter you would be empowering her to make her own choices, and maybe offer advice about being safe. That's it. Instead you went to her father to attack her for how she chooses to live her life, and that makes you TA ######


Prompt:
(Throwaway account for a friend, I'll answer any questions I can)

Background:
I (21F) am 6 and a half months pregnant with my (22M) partner of 6 years.
We already have a 4 year old together, who was an accident but he is the best thing in my life.
The 3 of us are living in 1 room at my partner's mum's (54) bungalow, and she agreed to adapt her dining room into a bedroom for our son now that he's getting older and needs more space. This should be done in about 3 weeks.

When we found out we were pregnant with our first, my family didn't approve of us keeping the baby because of our age and other circumstances and it strained our relationship quite badly causing a lot of arguments and tension for a while.
We're past that now, they love my son, and they're happy to support us in whatever ways they can.

My partner and I decided to try for another baby whilst our first is still young so he can have a sibling to grow up with, and when I first found out that I was pregnant I didn't want to tell my family because I knew they would have the same reaction as the first time due to our current financial situation. To make sure no one slipped up and let my family know I'm pregnant, we didn't tell anyone else either. I was able to hide it well by wearing baggy clothes and jumpers mostly. It has now got to month 6, and no one has noticed or asked me, so I haven't told anyone.

A very small number of people know that I'm expecting, and have tried to convince me to tell everyone that I'm pregnant before the baby comes, but I don't want to deal with the drama and judgement until I have to.
We also haven't told our son yet, in case he mentions it to his grandad on one of their weekly video chats.

So, AITA for keeping my pregnancy a secret? ######

Response:
 YTA for many reasons. You’re already struggling financially now, so I can’t even begin to fathom the pressure you’ll be under with a second child.
Also, your MIL now has to put up with another small child in her already tiny home. You are creating a hostile environment for everyone.
By not revealing your pregnancy, you are essentially just prolonging the inevitable. ######


Prompt:
My wife dated someone when she was in her early 20s for a while who I'll call Dan. Dan is slightly older than her and has always had addiction and mental health issues. She finally cut him off right before we met. He developed an obsession with her, and all but stalked her until we got married and moved away. For years, every time someone ran into her in her home town, all they talked about was how Dan constantly talked about her and was so in love with her.

We had kids, and our oldest got into a relationship and got married. As it happens, the betrothed is a child of Dan's sister (small world).I support my children 100%, and they do seem like a good couple.

We weren't worried. Over 24 years had passed. Even if he did realize she was present, hopefully he wouldn't make a scene and things would be fine. It's not like we would have to socialize with the entire extended family weekly.

Well, at the wedding, it was on. Dan made a beeline towards my wife and I at the cocktail hour. He made us both very uncomfortable and was making things all about him and his ~~feelings~~obsession. Subtlety wasn't cutting it. We didn't want to derail the reception with this. So we came up with a plan over text. I went off under the pretext of going to the bathroom, and when I came back, immediately started an aggressive teenage-style make-out with her against the nearest wall. He looked like he was about to cry and stormed off.

I stayed overly affectionate the entire night and it worked to keep him away from our table. The wedding happened in February, and my child and their spouse just got their pictures back, and there's a full spread of, well, us. They're furious at us for making a scene and "hogging attention" at their wedding. We were just trying to stop a bigger scene. We don't really want to tell them because it might make their relationship with their in-laws more complicated. ######

Response:
 YTA for making this up.

No wedding photog worth their salt would include a full spread of you two snogging. ######


Prompt:
I threw a customers silicon wedding band in the garbage and all hell broke loose

So I was at work and I found this wedding band on the ground in the afternoon and decided to keep it on the cash register. Come the next morning I see it’s still there so I just decided to toss it. A few hours later mr dude comes through asking if anyone had seen a band and my staff knew that I’d found it yesterday and were all looking at me like where is it. I then responded and said “I threw it away.” Pointed at the garbage can and walked away. They expected me to look through the can and I had to be talked to like I did something wrong. I’m an adult if I lose something I don’t expect the world to find my lost item. My job is cashier not lost and found warden or dumpster diver. And also how do you lose a wedding band when it’s strapped to your finger. I really don’t feel bad but am failing to see the reason everyone was so upset with me. Dude lost his ring it got thrown away. Tough shit dude. ######

Response: YTA for making the executive decision to throw it away without giving it a few days. Your lack of compassion and fuck you got mine attitude is disturbing ######


Prompt:
I know that the title makes my situation sound bad, but hear me out.

So my daughter, who is 15 years old, recently came out to me as a lesbian, which I wholeheartedly support. That was about 3 days ago. Yesterday, she went to see some of her friends (with masks and social distancing) and they hung out for a while. When I came to pick her up, I noticed that she was acting more skittish around one of her friends (let's call her K) so I made a joke asking if she liked K (in a crush/romantic way). She freaked out at me, crying and saying that she hadn't told K yet about her being gay. I assumed that she had already told K, since she was so comfortable coming out to me. But AITA for accidentally embarrassing her in front of K? ######

Response: YTA for making the assumption that she was out to her friends because she came out to you. Go apologize to her, profusely. Tell her there is no excuse for what you did and you won't make that mistake again. You're probably going to have to re-earn her trust unfortunately. ######


Prompt:
My ex and I have a 10 year old daughter from a teenage relationship. My daughter lives with my ex and I pick her up for the afternoon on one weekend day and often take her out for dinner during the week. She still has a stuffed dog I bought for her when she was a baby and carries the damn thing everywhere.  It is always dirty and I think she's too old to carry a toy everywhere.

I made a rule that she either leaves the toy at home or puts it inside a plastic bag when she's in my car or home. She cried and said I was mean, then later my ex called me to yell at me. She said I was being insensitive to my daughter's disability and needs. (Apparently she's autistic but I don't believe that.) ######

Response: YTA for making a 10 year old cry. ######


Prompt:
So I (f26) have a boyfriend (m24) and recently he got into a dispute with the neighbour's kids. They accidentally kicked their football into our yard and they came into the garden to get it back. Tbh, I didnt care but my boyfriend started screaming at these like 11 year ds about how they are poorly raised and their parents should be ashamed. I. Was. Fucking. Mortified. I sent the kids some chocolates and sweets and apologised profusely for his behaviour.

I was seeing red flags and told him this behaviour was NOT normal. He kind of brushed me off and I told him if he pulled anything like that again he was gone.

The next week the ball came into our garden and I was about to throw it back to the kids when my boyfriend stormed outside and took the ball inside. I told the kids that I would bring it back in a minute. He went into the bathroom and emerged like 10 minutes later wearing gloves and a football covered in shit. HIS OWN SHIT. WHAT THE FUCK.

I asked him if he was out of his fucking mind but he stormed past me and threw it over the fence screaming "TAKE THAT YOU BITCHES". I screamed and girl I mean screamed at him about how he was a fucking douche and I wanted him out of my house and he is a disgusting fucking monster and that they were just kids. I screamed and screamed and eventually he left.

I deleted all his games off of his ps4 and gave it to the kids as an apology. I was so embarrassed.

My ex-bf's mom messaged me asking what happened and I responded with

"What happened? WHAT HAPPENED? You are a pathetic excuse of a woman who raised a fucking sociopath who covered a football in his own shit and threw it at some kids and he needs to be a in a facility because something is wrong with him and god knows how I hadn't seen any red flags about the fucking monster you raised during the 7 months we dated".

I know I am in the right for what I did to my bf but am I in the wrong for snapping at the mother for something she had no direct involvement in? ######

Response:
 YTA for lashing out at the mom. Yes, a child’s actions can reflect on the parent, but something like mental health can happen with or without amazing parenting.

I get that it was in the heat of the moment, but I really hope you apologize to her and talk about your ex’s situation to her a bit more thoroughly after. ######


Prompt:
My cousin (18f) and I (21f)  were never really close because she was the beautiful darling girl of the family while I was just the "smart" one. It also doesn't help that we were just two different people.

My cousin is known to use so much photoshop and makeup on all of her pictures to make herself look older than she is. She's not aware of the real world and how some of the older men tend to be towards young women around her age.

Today, my mom told me that my cousin got knocked up by her 22 year old boyfriend. I feel as if the boyfriend is only using her for her looks/ sex. My family has a long history of 16-20 year old women becoming mothers too quick. I'm the only one (so far) who isn't a mother at 21.

I told my mom that my cousin had just fucked her life up and that she needs to get a job and not try to rely on her parents money. My mother got mad because I wasn't like everyone else in the family who was excited and kissing my cousin's ass.

I blame her parents for not putting her on birth control when I told them that I know guys around her boyfriend's age and how a lot of them are known to leave once they get the girl pregnant. I blame the boyfriend for not being mature enough to buy condoms.

I defended myself by saying "if I've gotten pregnant at her age, you would be pissed off. Why are we kissing her ass for spreading her legs without protection."

I understand that a pregnancy is a huge thing in my family because of the history of young women getting pregnant. It could also be the fact that I have a hormonal condition that would make it hard for me to have children if I wanted them and that i could be jealous that I might never have that experience myself.

Am I the asshole for not being happy for my young cousin's pregnancy? ######

Response:
 YTA for how you’ve communicated your dismay and disappointment in your younger cousin’s behaviour. I actually agree with you and feel that she’s probably going to lose some opportunities- whether temporarily or permanently- due to a pregnancy this early in her life. But it’s her life and her consequences. You don’t have to agree with her choices but you don’t have to be overly blunt when voicing your opinions.

Edit: typo ######


Prompt:
Since quarantine started, a couple of us have been meeting up online and having "hangouts". We essentially just talk about random stuff, gossip, and drink together. It's nothing much but keeps us sane.

My friend Tiffany was talking about the new post-doc in her research lab. She was gushing about how hot he is and how if there's anyone she'd marry it's him. Naturally, we all wanted to see how he looked and when she showed us, he was good looking but I wasn't impressed, but encouraged her. I told her that he wasn't my type, but she should go for it. Another one of my friends agreed with me.

Tiffany laughed and asked us who our 'dream' husbands were. Now, I'm already married, but I thought it was just a fun question and without thinking, blurted out "Brad Pitt". My other friend, who's also married, said "Adam Driver". Everyone just laughed and joked about how if they ever meet them, they'll tell them to give us a call. However, my husband became quiet and stayed that way until the end.

When we exited the call, my husband said that he's disappointed that he wasn't my dream husband and said that "I thought loving you was enough for you" and sulked to the guest room. I told him that I didn't really mean it and it was just a joke, but he said that he was hurt about how fast I said it, like it's always in the back of my mind. I told him that he's being ridiculous and that I'll always love him and I don't even love or like Brad Pitt. He's just a pretty man with too much drama and baggage. Husband wasn't having it and didn't even talk to me in the morning.

AITA? ######

Response:
 YTA for how you handled this with your husband.

He is allowed his feelings. He is allowed to feel insecure about what you said, and you are allowed to not mean it how he took it.

None of that actually resolved the core issue- which is he felt x, and you didn’t take how he felt seriously, and just dismissed his feelings, saying his thoughts, feelings and reality is wrong, and he should just believe you loved him.

You may want to sit down with him & act like you take what he feels seriously, and ask him how you can reassure him that he is the only guy you love. ######


Prompt:
My sister is almost 30, still lives at home and doesn't have a real job. She wants to become a successful   Etsy "couture home decor artist."

Basically she wants buy Made in China junk, decorate it and sell it at 900% markup. I told her Pier One already beat her to it and they're going out of business. Faced with the reality she was going to have to get a real job, she "reinvented" her "business" as a "social justice home decor art." The junk (picture frames, vases, candles, wine bottles, baskets, Chia pets, pet "fashion," and gnomes) she wants to sell is going to be designed with rainbow flags, images of diversity, etc.

She thinks her "art" will fly off the shelves but has no money to invest. My parents lied and said they're broke so she hit me up. She told me she needed roughly $20,000 to start and needed it quickly. That made me laugh. I told her I'd burn $20,000 than invest in her shitty "art." ######

Response: YTA for how you handled that. Yeah, I also think it won’t go as she thinks it will, but you were a total asshole in your response. You could have evenly, and cooly, and helpfully explained your view to her, but instead you dumped your derision on her. ######


Prompt:
My husband's friend and his wife are pregnant and expecting a boy. They recently told my husband that they want to name the baby after him.

When my husband and his friend where teenagers, his friend was involved in a really bad accident while they were riding dirt bikes. If my husband had not been there that day his friend would have died, so I get why they want to do this.

It is sweet, but I hate the idea. My husband and I are trying to conceive, and if we have a boy, I had thought about naming him after my husband. I'm not saying that we would, but I would like for that option to at least be available to us. As much time as we spend with his friend and his friend's wife, it would be awkward to have two boys with the same name.

I asked my husband to politely request that they pick another name, and he refused. He told me that it was strange to be so upset over this when we may never have a boy and it's unlikely we would name our son after him.

When my husband refused I reached out to the friend and his wife about it. I told them that it was ultimately their choice but it bothered me and I'd ask that they use another name if they didn't mind. They were really nice about it and said they understood my point. They may use his middle name, but they aren't going to use his first name.

I don't think what I did was inappropriate, but my husband said I was acting entitled and like an asshole. He thinks I should have minded my own business instead of telling his friend and his friend's wife not to name their baby after him. I am not sure if his criticism is valid or if he's just upset that he won't get his namesake now. ######

Response:
 Yta for going around your husband.

Beyond that,I have a brother who is named after my dad. It is nothing but hassles and headaches when dealing with nearly everything, especially government bureaucracy. Don't do it. ######


Prompt:
I have a seventeen year old daughter who has been kind of difficult lately. She is getting really into social issues and just doesn’t stop when I ask her to. We were having a conversation last night about relationships and I admitted that I didn’t love her father when I married him and I married him entirely for his money and she got very upset.

I always assumed she kind of knew. We have a 25 year age difference, got married after less than a year of knowing each other and she’s heard stories from family about the crazy fights we used to have. She got really mad at me which I can’t figure out because she knows how much I love him right now. She just kept saying that was terrible and I set women back.

She called me a prostitute which my husband overheard and began screaming and tried to ground her for two weeks, but I talked him out of that. Right now she is still mad at me but not mad at him for blowing up on her. My husband says I shouldn’t have told her when I knew she was going through this phase. ######

Response:
 YTA for giving your 17-year-old daughter some very complicated information that she couldn’t possibly begin to understand. Just because she knows there’s a 25 year age difference between you and your husband, doesn’t mean she knows that you married him purely for money. Honestly, I think you’re an asshole for doing that too, but it’s not why you came here.

Even if it’s true and even if subconsciously your daughter knew that, no kid would enjoy being told one of their parents didn’t love the other parent when they got married.

Not everything is for your kids to hear, no matter how old they are.

You are an asshole. Your husband is right. And your daughter has every reason to be upset with you. ######


Prompt:
My husband wanted to go visit his mom the other day and I really didn’t want to drag the kids over there because I feel like she makes it obvious she doesn’t want to be a grandmother but my husband keeps pushing it. She doesn’t like to be touched, like to an extreme and doesn’t want her own grandchildren touching her. So I have to explain to my 5 and 7 year old why they can’t touch their grandmother.

She is remarried to a man with a nine year old daughter and she has been around since the kid was three. She claims she is just frigid and can’t stand being touched unless it’s a man but when we were over her husband was going to take her stepdaughter home and they hugged. I’ve seem her be physically affectionate with her stepdaughter in the past and it really bothers me. I said I thought no one was allowed to touch you. We ended up fighting and I said I just wanted to know why hugged her stepdaughter.

My MIL started sobbing and that’s a big deal because this woman never shows emotion. She screamed something about do I think she likes being this way and then locked herself in her bedroom. Her husband told us to go back to our welfare lives and leave his family alone, so pretty much implying that we’re not his family. ######

Response:
 YTA for fighting with her about her boundaries. You don't have to like or understand other people's boundaries, but you do have to accept them.

She doesn't want anyone but her immediate family touching her. Regardless of how much it bothers you, everyone has the inarguable, absolute, end-all be-all right to decide who touches them, and under what circumstances. If the "who" is "no one" and the circumstances are "none," **that is her right.** Accept that. ######


Prompt:
I’ve (21M) been with the same girl (21F) for about 2 years now. A little while into our relationship I started having suspicions about my sexuality but I was honest with her that I thought I might be bi. Over the last year or so I’ve been pretty much sure I’m gay now. With the way my attractions have changed, sexual desires, etc.

I told her this back on Tuesday, because I had no other choice but to be honest with her for the sake of both of us. She basically called me a fucking asshole, and told me I was stringing her along. I told her that wasn’t how it was and that I had no idea for the longest time, that I thought I was straight or at least bi. She told me to go to hell and left. I did expect this reaction.

I’ve also gotten hounded from her family the last few days though. They told me I knew and was stringing her along. I don’t get how this is the case. I had no idea I was gay for the longest time, and quite frankly wouldn’t want to be if I had the choice. I felt like I had to tell her, to be honest and end our relationship. Did I fuck up? AITA? ######

Response: YTA for continuing to date this woman for “the last year or so” when you’ve “been pretty much sure I’m gay.” You didn’t need to come out to her but you should have broken up with her and yes, you were stringing her along. ######


Prompt:
So my girlfriend and I are from different countries. I come from a muslim majority country and she comes from a christian country. Her name is something like Alison and all her friends and family are calling her Ali, except me, I call her by her full name because Ali is my dad's name and I feel weird calling my girlfriend with my dad's name.

This is normally fine, and my gf is okay with it, even though it was a bit unusual for her at first. It's not like you call out someone with their name all the time anyway. But last month we went to visit her parents for the first time and I called her by her name and her parents got started questioning me. I told them the same thing, but they said nobody calls her by her full name and they didn't want to use the full name ever, that I'm being disrespectful towards them etc etc. Here is where I might be the AH, I couldn't stand hearing all these stuff and with a grin on my face told them I'd rather not call my dad's name while sleeping with their daughter. After that crickets followed, they dropped the subject and didn't bring it up ever again.

But when we got back my GF was a little bit angry, telling me that her parents really grilled her about how disrespectful I was and all that. I actually don't care about if I am the AH since the subject was dropped (which was my aim), but I am curious as to see if I am actually the AH on this. ######

Response:
 YTA for bringing up your girlfriend's sex life with her parents. Like not even cool. You're not the only one involved to give consent to that.

On another note I think it's real weird they named their daughter something they won't even call her by. ######


Prompt:
It’s a cheap house I want to invest in.  Owned by the state currently.  I’m doing inspections now, if report ok (I expect some work but ok as in I can afford fixes) I’ll buy cash and fly out and start the renovations.  Probably just rent it out but I want it to be nice enough to rent so it’s not probably cheap in total but cheap enough for me to start the process.  Hell, I might wipe out my savings but I see it to be a big risk big reward and I have the hair up my ass to do it.

While my own family of origin is really excited for me and even wants to help me because they’re bored, my spouses family thinks we should help them because they’re not working.

Wtf.  I’m just going to be honest and blatant and vulgar.  So be aware of profanity

Fuck those lazy ass people.  I have never known them to do anything but be mooches and I could give a shit less. “Because they’re not working” they never work or they work quit work quit.  TF does that have to do with me?

The kicker? My wife warned me about bringing this shit up to them.  I didn’t even think about it when I said it.  Now when she talks to them she puts the phone on speaker and it’s all “woe is me, I need I need” and she just looks at me like, I blame you.

Anyway maybe I’m an asshole.  You can determine but either way.  Fuck them. Like they could really become homeless for real and I’m not giving them shit because I’ve seen them not help themselves so long it wouldn’t surprise me. ######

Response:
 YTA for bringing it up when your wife TOLD YOU NOT TO.

You knew who they were, she knows who they are.

At this point you would be even more TA, if both you and your wife firmly didn't tell them no, and to not ask for anything again. ######


Prompt:
My 14yo son goes to a private high school. Very pricey and the vast majority of the families are loaded with money. Money is no object to them. My son happens to get a partial scholarship so I can afford his education.

A lot of the kids at his high school do a semester of studying aboard. Usually in Australia and Switzerland. My son's friends are going to do that in spring (yes, you can do this with the pandemic). My son begged me to let him go and I was open to it.

Until I saw the cost.

Over $10,000 to go to a Swiss high school for four months. I clearly do not have that kind of money. I don't want my son to feel ashamed about my not having the kind of money his friends' families do and  I feel incredibly guilty about it. I don't want him to feel ashamed.

I told him to forget about it because he would get bored, it's too cold, his mother would have to sign off for legal reasons and I can't find her, etc. Anything but money.

I don't discuss my finances with my son. It's none of his business and that's why I don't tell him the truth. ######

Response: YTA for being so proud that you can’t even tell your own son that you’re struggling financially. Saying “it’s a lot of money, and I’m worried about Covid right now” would have been perfectly fine. At least then, he knows the truth, but he can also tell his friends at school that he isn’t going because of Covid. Tell him the truth; he’s 14 years old. He deserves to know. Hiding things from him is never going to end well. ######


Prompt:
Yesterday I really wanted to eat steak, so I bought a beautiful piece of Argentinian chorizo (New York Strip) at a very fancy place. I bought gourmet butter and some rosemary, and I say this to emphasize how much I was craving and how much effort I put in the making.

I told my gf IN THE MORNING that I wanted steak and that I was going to buy it for dinner, she didn't say she wanted some of it. She knew about it and said nothing, I had no idea she assumed I was cooking for both of us.

She is usually very cool but she's extremely upset about this for some reason, she cried for half an hour and is STILL barely talking to me. I'm like?? Wtf?? What did I do? How was I supposed to know??

This whole thing ruined my dinner and I don't think is fair that women can get away with not communicating jack shit and expecting us to read their minds.

Please put me in peace, Reddit: was I the asshole?

PS. My region has very few active cases of coronavirus, we are allowed to go out normally as long as we wear a face mask. I did not break quarantine for a steak, I'm not stupid. If you can and if your region has cases, stay at home.

PS'. English is not my first language, excuse any mistake

PS''. Throw away account because I'm embarrassed at how stupid this is ######

Response: YTA for all the reasons mentioned above but also for coming out of the gate with “I’m tired of women expecting us to read their mind with no communication!” You were clearly the one communicating improperly, and made it like your gf was unreasonable and impossible to understand. ######


Prompt:
Y'all... I can't even explain how terrible these things are. He's making them right now. I hear him in the kitchen, and I'm scared. When I hear the metal spatula hit my cast-iron skillet, I know what's coming, and it fills me with dread.

He makes breakfast burritos. When I make them, I do it the right way:  Eggs, bell pepper, fried potatoes, sausage or bacon, and I wrap it up in a tortilla with cheese and salsa. Not him.... He first uses the metal spatula on cast iron, so he just scraps all the burning eggs sticking to the pan in with the rest of the eggs. He also uses WAY too much milk and butter with the eggs. Then he adds the salsa straight in with the eggs, which creates so much liquid that the egg can't absorb it, so it's just soup in a burrito. And then, THEN, the sick freak adds MUSHROOMS. 🤢

The thing is, he is so proud of these burritos. He's always like, "Turned out pretty good this time, didn't they?" But they never do! They... Never... Do. He's making them right now, and I'm hiding in the bathroom faking morning sickness.

So... AITA for not just sucking it up and eating them? ######

Response:
 YTA for acting like a child and not just telling him that while you're glad he enjoys his creations they're just not your thing and you'd rather make your own.

Use your words. ######


Prompt:
This evening, I was walking my dog. During the walk, I recognized this girl I went to high school with sitting outside while I was passing her house. Her dogs were barking at me, so I just asked friendly as all hell, "Are your dogs mean?" But she didn't say anything. She was kind of close so I knew she heard me, but I asked again slightly louder. Still nothing. After that, I just accepted that she was obviously shunning me, said good night, and kept walking.

On the way back, I was passing her house again and there was this dude standing on the porch. I think it was a younger brother. I said nothing, but all he said was, "Yeah, keep walking, bastard."

At this point, I was thinking, "What the hell did I do?" I asked him, "Is there something wrong?" He didn't say anything though.

To clarify, I'm not infamous in my hometown for anything. The sun was going down, but it was like during the golden hour. This was the first time I'd ever talked to her.

I have to confess, though, I only spoke to her because she's seems lovely and I was looking to start something. But there was nothing creepy about the way I spoke to her. By the way, I'm a year out of high school and I think she just graduated. Maybe I'll try again in the future. I'm still wondering what the hell I did wrong. ######

Response: YTA for acting entitled to a response, leave her alone. ######


Prompt:
I'm Canadian-Italian; while I speak English, my parents do not; growing up I spoke Italian at home and English at school. I used to live in a neighborhood in Toronto with a predominant Italian population.

Our childhood grocery store was Italian run and while you could make due in English shopping there, you can forget about the patisserie counter, deli counter, etc unless you spoke at least some proficiency in Italian. Pointing at food only got you so far since many of the employees spoke Italian first.

It's been 25 years since I've been to this grocer and for some nostalgia sake as well as I had some errands in Toronto, I drove up and thought I'd surprise my husband back home with some nice cold cuts and pastries from my old stomping grounds.

I'm doing my shopping and I can tell things have changed. I know the grocer is still family run but a lot of the employees are no longer Italian. This is whatever. I do my shopping and get to the deli counter and start asking for some specific things and half of the things I wanted, the employee doesn't know what it is or cannot find it.

This employee isn't Italian, so I ask her if there's an Italian employee who can help me. This would go a lot faster and smoother if I can ask for what I want in Italian. Plus, an Italian employee is going to know every single thing I ask for and where to find it. A lot of products have Italian names or I don't know the name but can describe it well enough in Italian.

I guess my request was taken abrasive but she ended up calling over someone who could speak Italian and off we go. The first employee told me it was rude to speak in a different language in their presence and she assumed I was talking about her without her knowing. She said it was racist to assume she couldn't do her job because of her ethnicity/language. I just wanted some cold cuts.

Was I the asshole? ######

Response:
 YTA for a couple of reasons:

>I ask her if there's an Italian employee who can help me. This would go a lot faster and smoother if I can ask for what I want in Italian.

If language is the issue, what you should have asked is if there are any employees who **speak** Italian.  Not everyone born in Italy is going to be able to speak the language, and there are plenty of people *not* born in Italy who *do* speak the language.

>Plus, an Italian employee is going to know every single thing I ask for and where to find it.

Now you're making assumptions about whether or not someone will know where a product is based on their nationality?  That's pretty offensive.  Everyone who works there should know where all the products are.  If they don't, it's because they're not a great employee, not because they're not Italian.  A crappy Italian employee would likewise not know where everything is. ######


Prompt:
I'm 18 (turning 19 in November). Someone posted some art in a fandom community I am in late last year and it was great so I made a twitter account to follow the artist. Big-ish account. He's 24 (almost 25) and I quickly developed a crush on him. He's so nice and handsome and humble, replies to every tweet and dm, that kind of person. He had a convo with him but heres the problem: he doesnt talk to minors at all (in dms anyway). He also made this tweet that dating under 21s is weird for him because he's old and his not even being legally able to drink would freak him out (personal preference?). It made me sad but it is what it is.

I dmed him about something (fandom related) in March or so and we started talking. He asked my age and pronouns as he does with everyone and I don't know what possessed me but I told him I'm 22. Well, we did become friends, I kind of flirted, he flirted back, we binged tv shows together and got very close. He asked me out in early June and now we're happily dating. Problem is, I feel like an asshole because I feel like I'm lying to him. I talked to a friend about it and she basically called me an asshole as well and told me to "leave this poor man alone" but he's so good and nice and talented. I know he'll be mad if I tell him the truth but I only did it for my own happiness. Am I an asshole? ######

Response: Yta evetually hes going to find out he will notice when you do not buy drinks at a resturant or other tiny things will show that you are underage ######


Prompt:
I am 36 and have a 16 year old daughter.

I have full custody of her because her mom, 40, had a mental breakdown and has been in and out of rehab.

This January, I started dating my girlfriend (21F).

Then quarantine happened and that time apart made me realize that I wanted to spend my life with her. So I proposed in May and she’s moved in. Our wedding is in October.

Since then, my daughter has been a nightmare. She and my youngest sister, 25, keep calling my fiancée “ the kid.”

My fiancée decides to invite my daughter out to go shopping. She kept trying to set a date but my daughter kept saying she had an extracurricular activity.

So yesterday day when my daughter once again said she was going to practice her serve, I decided to follow her car.

She ended up pulling up to a diner and I realized she was grabbing lunch with my youngest sister.

I am furious. First at my sister for enabling toxic behavior and second at my daughter for lying to her stepmom.

I ended up taking her car keys away from her. Her aunt then calls and says I had no right to do so. I explained that she would not be getting her car back until she makes an attempt to bond with her stepmom.

AITA for not condoning lying? I just want my fiancée to be accepted into the family. ######

Response:
 YTA every step of the way. Let's break this down:

> I am 36 and have a 16 year old daughter.....This January, I started dating my girlfriend (21F)

Okaaaay, so your dating a girl that's only a couple years older than your daughter. Kinda weird.

>Then quarantine happened and that time apart made me realize that I wanted to spend my life with her. So I proposed in May and she’s moved in.

So proposed after 5 months of dating, much of which you've been "apart" and moved her into your home with your daughter? Has your daughter met this person? I take it she didn't have a say in her moving in?

>Since then, my daughter has been a nightmare. She and my youngest sister, 25, keep calling my fiancée “ the kid.”

Understandable that your daughter has considerable resentment about this situation. I'd probably refer to her as "the kid" too.

>So yesterday day when my daughter once again said she was going to practice her serve, I decided to follow her car. She ended up pulling up to a diner and I realized she was grabbing lunch with my youngest sister.

So seems like your daughter has no interest in bonding with your fiancée but doesn't want to create drama so she blew her off? Have you never used a white lie to avoid having to spend time with someone? Would you have preferred that she was honest and told your fiancée that she wasn't interested in spending time with her? Would that have been better? You followed her car, wtf?

>I am furious....my daughter for lying to her stepmom.

She's not her "stepmom." First, she's not your wife, she's your fiancée. Second, "stepmom" assumes that your fiancée is some type of parental figure to your daughter, which with only a 5 year age gap is NEVER going to be the case.

>I explained that she would not be getting her car back until she makes an attempt to bond with her stepmom. AITA for not condoning lying? I just want my fiancée to be accepted into the family.

This isn't about "condoning lying." If it was, then an apology for lying and her being honest about not wanting to bond with your fiancée friend would be sufficient. This is about you wanting to force your daughter to accept your fiancée, and punishing her if she doesn't. You can't force that and your approach isn't helping.

You forced this whole weird situation on your daughter and it's not going how you hoped. Talk to your daughter about her concerns. You probably need to take a step back with your fiancée. ######


Prompt:
She made it very clear she does not want to have children. She is our 2nd adopted child. Unfortunately we have not been able to parent our own children, we tried our best.

She has not been very receptive to our collective response, and has been very reclusive, out from the usual. Has been acting out, and physical at times.

I love her so much. This is hurtful, to me and her, as we do not know how to respond properly. She is my beautiful daughter. ######

Response: YTA even though you didn’t really ask. This reads more like boasting about your shitty choices. You don’t provide any details about adopting her. Was she a baby? Does she remember her real parents? Did she have a crappy life? Maybe she doesn’t want to have kids because she remembers what her life was like before she was adopted and it was traumatic. If she was a baby when adopted, maybe she’s just scared of being a crappy parent like you. ######


Prompt:
(23m) Just started dating this girl (21) for maybe two months now and she came over to hang  yesterday. Her cycles are irregular due to her birth control and her periods can range from a month to several months.

Accidents happen and she bled right through her underwear through her jeans. I gave her a spare of my boxers and some sweatpants that she could wear home. She asked if I would just throw her underwear in the wash with all my other clothes and she would come get them tomorrow when I see her again, I refused.

We got into a big argument on why I should wash them for her. I wasn’t going to have a blood soaked underwear mixed in with my clothes. It was gross and disgusting and she could take it for herself. Eventually she just got mad and threw it in the trash. ######

Response: YTA either sex ed has seriously failed you, or you have a phobia of blood. Also, do your gf a favor and break up, she doesn’t deserve that ######


Prompt:
 Throwaway because I don't want this tied to my main.

I've been dating this girl for 8 months now. She's honestly amazing and I can almost see our future together. She has a 3 year old daughter from a past relationship, whom I've never met. I've seen pictures, videos, and heard her gush about her daughter but I've never formally met her.

Couple of days ago, I was out doing some small grocery shopping, I saw my girlfriend with her daughter in the store, I thought that it would be nice to approach her to say a quick hello. I tried to place a small kiss on her lips, but she dodged my kiss, which I found very rude and odd. Her daughter was very hyper, and quite sweet. She would enthusiastically wave and say hi to most people, including me. I offered to help her load her groceries in her car, but she politely declined. When she was instructing her daughter to say a proper goodbye, my girlfriend referred to me as her "friend" rather than her "boyfriend" which I thought was rather insulting.

When we were on a call, I asked her why she didn't introduce me formally to her daughter, didn't allow me to help her and why she dodged my kiss. I explained to her that I thought that her behavior towards me was rather cold, and unlike how she usually was. She apologized, but told me that I was slightly overreacting.

AITA? ######

Response:
 YTA dude, she’s 3.  She wouldn’t even understand what a ‘boyfriend’ is. And she doesn’t need to see people she doesn’t know be intimate with her mum, the kiss is inappropriate too until she knows you.

You want to be with this woman, you have a lot to learn about what it takes to be a parent, trust and respect what she wants and how she wishes to raise her daughter. ######


Prompt:
I (m35) have a 16 year old daughter. I’ve been a single father since she was about 3 years old as I got sole legal custody due to some addiction issues her mother has. We have a really good relationship, but I always worry about her not having a woman to talk to.

Over the past few months she hasn’t really seemed to be herself, I know she went through a bad break up but I’ve been worried it’s more than that. I’ve tried talking to her, and my sister only lives down the street so she’s tried talking to her also, but my daughter is really keeping to herself and it concerns me.

She went out to see her friends for the first time since quarantine started yesterday and asked me if I could give her room a quick tidy whilst she was gone. I agreed because she does a lot of chores but she’s not good at cleaning her room. Whilst I was putting clothes back in her closet, I stumbled upon what I now know to be her diary.

I shouldn’t have read past the first page but I just wanted to know if there was anything going on she wasn’t telling me about. There were some pretty heartbreaking stuff for a father to read about how down she felt about herself, so when she got home I brought it up to her.

She asked me why this was suddenly coming up and when I told her I’d read her diary she absolutely flipped and told me it was an absolute violation of privacy and she’s completely humiliated. I told her I was just trying to protect her and she said it was none of my business and locked herself in her bedroom and hasn’t spoken to me since. AITA? ######

Response: YTA dude you just violated her privacy big time. ######


Prompt:
Hey guys, I know the title sounds horrible but bear with me please.

I (23M) have recently started using Tinder. In the beginning it was just for fun because I was bored. I had no expectations from it and no intentions of really meeting someone. I matched with a couple of girls and started texting with some of them, but it was usually just a small talk and it never became anything serious.

About two weeks ago this girl texted me on Tinder. She looked a bit chubby and I don’t know why I swiped right, because that’s not really my type. Nevertheless I texted her back (probably because I was bored) and we started chatting. In went on for days and we really clicked. We had a lot in common and were texting almost every day, I was genuinely exited about her. We were talking about our friends, hobbies, family and pretty much everything. This went on for about two weeks and I asked her to meet in person. She was a bit shy and hesitant, but in the end we agreed to go on a dinner together.

I made a reservation in a nice Italian restaurant in the city centre and we were supposed to meet there. I came about 5 minutes earlier and she came right on time. When I saw her I was a bit shocked, because she looked a lot different in reality. In her pictures she was a bit chubby but in reality she was straight up fat (I don’t know if she used old pictures, or photoshopped her body or if she just took the pictures in in right angles). She looked exited and started a conversation, but I just couldn’t. I told her that I expected something else, apologized, paid for my drink and left.

When I came home my roommates asked how my date was and I told them. We had a pretty heated debate about this, because two of them thought I was a dick for leaving her like that just for having a couple more pounds and the other one though I didn’t do anything wrong.
So what’s your opinion guys AITA? ######

Response:
 YTA don’t swipe right on someone you wouldn’t want to actually go on a date with. She couldn’t have messaged you without you first swiping right.

You said you clicked with her and YOU asked HER out on a date.  Even if you weren’t attracted to her you could’ve at least finished the date and let her know nicely that you didn’t think it was going to work out instead of being a dick and leaving during drinks.

You most likely destroyed this girls confidence because you think she’s fat. Only swipe on people you would actually sit through an entire date with asshole ######


Prompt:
So... title doesn’t sound great, but hear me out.

My wife and I are both practical jokers and like to play around with our group of friends (and vice versa).  Back in those heady days when we could still have people to dinner, we had a bunch of friends over to dinner and decided to have a bit of fun.

We both like Hell’s Kitchen, and so thought it would be funny to recreate that while we were cooking for our friends.  Basically, as we were preparing dinner I was acting as Ramsay and my wife as one of the sous chefs, and I was just ripping her.  We tried to use the same lines as in Hell’s Kitchen so they would kind of get it and know we were joking.  So really trying to recreate a high pressure kitchen environment and me coming out with all the classics (“THE FISH IS FXXKING RAW, WHAT THE FXXK IS GOING ON”, “YOU FXXKING DONKEY, WHAT ARE YOU DOING”).  We would periodically go out to refill drinks and check on our friends and be completely normal, and then go back to the kitchen and just let rip.

We sat down to dinner and it was super uncomfortable, and so we told everyone how we were just joking and were acting as Ramsay.  One of our friends started crying and said she used to be in an abusive relationship and it wasn’t funny to joke about that stuff.  Dinner ended, everyone pissed and not talking to us.  We had no idea and felt terrible.

Edit: I didn’t want to make this too long, but just to be clear - we were super apologetic at the time and afterwards.  Individually called/e-mailed her afterwards, plus e-mailed the group to say sorry.  We weren’t trying to be dicks about it and felt terrible ######

Response: YTA do that shit when you two are alone not when you’re hosting people. How are they supposed to take it when you’re screaming at her in the kitchen and they aren’t sure if you’re serious or not. ######


Prompt:
It was my birthday yesterday and about a week ago my wife asked me what I wanted to do / what to have the our kids ( 11 m, 13 f, and 15 f) get me (she gives them the money then they gift it to me) . I told her that I didn't want do anything for it and that the perfect birthday for me would be me being able to spend the entire day in my office not having anyone ask me do anything for them.

You see, this quarantine has been very hard on me because I'm not used to spending this much time with my family as I usually work long hour days at my office with a pretty long commute, so my does most of the homemaking (she's a sahm). Because  of working at home now and my kids are out of school, I have been overwhelmed. They are constantly asking me to do stuff and are overall annoying right.  So I thought I could just get one day to relax without them badgering me.

My wife was taken aback from my request and said that maybe we could do something small for my b day. I insisted that we do nothing for my birthday and that the best gift she could give me would be her handling all of the childcare that day. She told me "fine whatever" in a snarky tone and I didn't respond.

She was weird with me up to my birthday, but I just ignored since I didn't want to fight with her.  Yesterday (my birthday), I told my kids thanks for saying happy birthday and told them to not try to speak with me for the day since I would be relaxing. They seemed fine with it and that was that. I went along with my day and it was absolutely amazing. No cake, no kids, no wife, just relaxing. I honestly needed it.

The problem is that now today my wife has been upset/bitchy with me and my kids have been basically ignoring me. It is honestly very immature imo. I just wanted one day to relax ffs, AITA? ######

Response: YTA definitely. imagine how happy your children were that they were finally able to spend time with their father who normally is out working, only for you to turn around and tell them that the best gift they could give you is to not talk to you? You have totally made them feel unwanted and isolated. Not to mention your poor wife, the woman you MARRIED being told that all her husband wants is a day without her, after spending all her time cooking and cleaning and raising YOUR children? Totally awful thing for you to do, you are DEFINITELY the asshole here. ######


Prompt:
So I’m from an asian country. Socially to some extent it’s kinda less conservative than some, so people date and have sex and all that without much of a problem, but we’re still generally obsessed with getting into good colleges and going into profitable careers. The top colleges in that regard are American ones like Ivies, Stanford, MIT, etc. I ended up getting into 8 ‘top’ US colleges, which led to lots of parents just hounding me with questions about how I got in and what their kids need to do to get in.

I told them I’d talk to their kids directly if they actually wanted advice, because I felt like I can be more real with kids around my age than adults. Some kids showed interest, so I set up a zoom call. In it, I talked about a lot of standard stuff— extracurriculars, grades, testing, essays. Someone asked me about social life and dating, and I told them honestly that I basically gave up my social life to grind 24/7— I had a pretty good social life to begin with since I’d say I was a friendly and chill guy, but I gave up a lot of social opportunities to work to secure my future. Someone brought up that I had dated a girl (smallish town, people know things), so I told him that I broke up with her because she and I had different goals— she wanted to have fun and make memories, I wanted to work hard, so we broke up and I worked hard and she made memories with other guys. I have no malice towards her for that. I did like her and I’m sad we weren’t compatible, but it is what it is.

Anyhow, apparently people thought this was juicy gossip and it spread. It got back to her and she is pissed at me for ‘slut shaming’ her by saying she ‘made memories with other guys’. I don’t think that’s slut shaming, that’s just me stating facts— she dated some other guys after we broke up. It’s not meant to be derogatory, just facts.

AITA? ######

Response:
 YTA but lightly.

You strike me as someone with relatively low emotional intelligence. Both by your choice of words to describe your ex as well as your responses to others.

Did you state facts? Sure. Did you need to? No. You could have used any other type of general example to get your point across to those students that there’s a trade off to the success you had. It’s called ‘tact’ and you have very little of it. ######


Prompt:
My wife finally succumbed to cancer after a three year long battle.

As her spouse, I had to take responsibility of her body. However, though we were legally spouses, for the last two and a half years my wife and I had been living apart. I had my own separate loft while the kids (13F,12F,10F) and her stayed in the house.

My wife was not lucid for about a month before her death. As such, she had no ability to write or even dictate her will.

In addition, during the past year I have found love again with my girlfriend (29), and she expressed that she was uncomfortable with me practically building a shrine for a woman from another relationship.

I was also uncomfortable reliving memories with a woman who, for many years, was the cause of a lot of emotional trauma for me. All her insults and put downs made it impossible for me to stay in the house. In addition, a funeral will probably be fraught with tension from her side of the family.

Therefore, I made the decision to donate her entire body to science and signed off on all the papers.

Immediately my daughter notified the people on her side and they said that I was violating the Greek Orthodox beliefs she had held throughout her life. She demanded I try to reverse my decision but I said I couldn’t do that.

AITA? I feel funerals are for the living and it wasn’t like I was not contributing her body to a good cause. I also do not know what exactly my late wife would have wanted for her funeral since she suddenly became unable to communicate. ######

Response: YTA but let me explain. Donating a body to science is fine...if that is what they wanted. You claim you didn’t know what your late wife wanted- your daughter has just told you. You say funerals are for the living- that doesn’t just mean you it means her children and other relatives too. I don’t know if it’s too late for you to change the decision but if it is please do. While you had the legal control over your wife’s body, you should leave that decision to the people that would have know what she wanted. ######


Prompt:
I (32M) have been friends with Levi (34M) for 13 years, I wouldn’t say we’re exactly best friends but we see each other every Fri and Sat at the gym and every Sunday as our sons (8) go to the same club.

When I was 15 my father remarried to my stepmother who’s daughter was 4 at the time, she’s 21 now and about to turn 22 in November, we’re actually really close so part of me is conflicted about this.

When my sister was 17 she got pregnant with her daughter, her daughter is 4.

I’ve known for about two years now that my friend has a thing for my sister but he’s married with two children so it’s harmless really. We got drunk a week ago to celebrate my promotion at work and got to the topic of my sister, he admitted he asked her out two years ago (despite being married) and she turned him down but then went on to say he’s shocked because he expected her to be easy.

In the morning he apologised and I didn’t feel the need to mention it at all, we were both drunk and it didn’t mean anything. My wife doesn’t have the same view as me, so now whenever I meet up with Levi or text him she’ll start an argument with me about how it “shows a lot about the man I am” and that she’s disgusted and wants to tell my sister, she won’t tell my sister. Levi apologised and it’s not as though A) my sister knows and B) as though he meant it because he didn’t.

I don’t want to throw away my friendship over something he didn’t even mean.

AITA?

ThrowRa as my sister doesn’t know. ######

Response: YTA but if it's any consolation your friend is a bigger asshole. Maybe that's why you get along. Your married 32 year old friend hits on your 19 year old sister and then gets butthurt when she, a literal teenager, turns him down so he holds onto that resentment for two years before drunkenly confessing to you, her brother, that he was surprised she didn't jump at the opportunity to sleep with a gross married man because he thought she was easy. Your wife is right, why would you want to be friends with this creep? ######


Prompt:
We have a girl here in our swimming team who has very low self esteem, to the point that she is constantly calling herself slow, stupid, ugly, short, fat, dark, single, unloved... basically anything negative. Every time she does that, we would assure her with something like "No you are not (insert word), you are wonderful." And things like that so that she can feel better about herself.

I may sound like 1 mean bitch but really, it is quite tiring sometimes to have someone saying something good about another person and this girl would make it all about her self esteem issue.

We were having a zoom chat with the team to catch up with each other when I mentioned that my brother is engaged. We may not see a wedding any time soon but this is good news to share nevertheless.

The other girls were like either asking me to say congratulations to my brother on their behalf or commenting(jokingly) about how jealous they are(my brother is very good looking). One even wanted to throw a surprise party on the couple.

And then this girl, she came in to dampen the mood by saying how lucky my brother is, unlike her who is not liked by any boys because she is ugly and fat. The atmosphere turned a little awkward as she kept saying negative things about herself.

I kind of said "Yups, couldn't agree more." And the it became even more awkward. She then started to throw a temper at me for being a bitch when all I did was to agree with what she said. The chat ended shortly and my friends were split between saying I shouldn't have said that and those who agree with me that we are tired of her shit already. What is your take reddit? ######

Response: YTA but good lord it was a necessary evil. I fucking despise people who fish for compliments are reassurance like that. ######


Prompt:
Edit:- Sorry for the mistake I’m 39 and not 35

Basically title says it all.

My (39M) step daughter (16F) did one of those adoption proposals, honestly it hurts to say, but I refused and did it as gently and respectfully as possible. She cried, like a lot, but she was very respectful of my decision.

Her mother says I broke her heart and no matter what I can’t fix it.

I have been in her life since she was 7, she met her bio-father twice when she was 14 and decided she didn’t want to anymore, although he keeps calling us to try to convince her, she seems determined she doesn’t want to see him, not for a specific reason according to her but because she doesn’t feel like it’s her dad.

AITA reddit?

Because I feel like one honestly ######

Response: YTA but also there seems to be some missing information. Why did you turn down her proposal? Do you consider yourself to be a father figure to her? Ultimately it’s your decision but if you’re already playing a fatherly role to her then I don’t see why you turned down her adoption proposal. Just because she has a bio father and has met him a couple times doesn’t mean she views him as her father. ######


Prompt:
My girlfriend (20f) and I (36m) have been living together for about six months now. She has quite a lot of mental and physical health conditions. She has chronic migraines, hypermobile joints that are causing severe pain her wrists, chronic kidney disease and pernicious anaemia, as well as depression.

She’s been struggling a lot over the past few weeks, a lot of headaches and pain in her wrists, but to me she’s doing absolutely nothing to help herself. She eats absolute junk and when she is feeling okay, she does absolutely no exercise or anything that could help her depression or her headaches. She’s so depressed she hasn’t even showered for maybe 2 weeks?

The other night I tried initiating a conversation on getting her back to feeling okay and she got really pissed at me telling her I just don’t understand how she feels. I appreciate that I don’t but I replied telling her she does absolutely nothing to help herself so it’s her own fault she feels like shit all the time. We ended in a massive argument and she’s been cooped up in the spare room ever since. AITA? ######

Response:
 YTA big time

1) Why are you 36 dating a 20 year old that ALREADY sets off so many separate flags

2) Depression is almost ALWAYS a side effect of chronic illnesses.

3) You think that at 20 years old she hasn't TRIED everything that would help with her chronic illnesses?????? You think you know her illnesses better than the person who's lived with them for I'm guessing at LEAST a good chunk of her life???? ######


Prompt:
My husband (28) and I (43) had a small birthday celebration for my daughter (15) in our backyard.

She was able to eat and hang out with her two best friends. Everything goes fine until her stepdad walks out with a buddy of his to grab some chips and drink a bottle of beer.

We have a very large deck and they were sitting in lawn chairs on the other side of it, yet my daughter kicks up a fuss and asks why they were there. She asks her stepfather to leave, and he says that this happens to be his deck, not hers.

I tell her that’s no way to treat her stepfather. In response, she says that she’s going over to her friend’s house to finish the rest of her birthday cake.

I was furious that she left despite my protests that she apologize to her stepdad first.

For her birthday, I had agreed to buy her a laptop because she had previously complained about having to share the large home computer with her stepfather, who likes it for his graphic design work and asks her not to keep clearing the history on it.

But I only agreed to buy her this on the condition that she keeps the peace around the house, and the blowup at the birthday party was the opposite of that.

My husband was humiliated and sometimes he sighs and says that he doesn’t know if this will work out.

I love him unconditionally. In addition, he was also being generous in allocating the deck when he could have said no.

I ended up returning the laptop back to where I bought it. When my daughter got home, she called me a sellout and refuses to eat with either me or her stepfather.

AITA? ######

Response:
 YTA big time

>My husband was humiliated and sometimes he sighs and says that he doesn’t know if this will work out.

Your husband is also manipulating you. ⬆ ######


Prompt:
I was babysitting 2 kids, 11 and 13 years old and I took them to the petting zoo. The goats were having sex and the kids were confused and asked me what they were doing and I tried to change the subject but they kept pestering me so I said they were having sex.

They asked me what sex was so I told them. I didnt go into detail but I just said Male and female animaks, including humans, do that to create babies, the male does it and it makes the female pregnant.

They kept asking more and more questions, I was shocked at this age they didnt know what sex was, so I told them a bit more and left.

Parents found out and fired me and told me it was not my job to teach them that and were fucking pissed. Everyone else says in in the wrong here ######

Response: YTA big time. You crossed a major boundary. The proper thing for you to have done would have been to say to the children something that could have eased into a transition onto another topic. Then, when you got home with the children you talk to the parents about what happened so they can be the ones to debrief with their kids on the birds and the bees. It is **never** your place to do so without the parents’ permission. YTA big time ######


Prompt: My friend has desperately wanted a pair of Vans Classics but can't afford £60 for them. Today we met up and she had a pair on which I was surprised at but she was so excited to finally have a pair. I asked her where she got them from and she said eBay. I commented on the fact she's said she can't afford a pair but she said with a massive smile 'I got them for £15, someone was selling their old ones that they have barely worn'. The shoes did look pretty new but I told her wearing second hand shoes is disgusting as you don't know who's worn them before you and what germs they might be carrying on their feet. She told me to mind my own business as not everyone can afford brand new stuff and she grew up being dressed in charity shops due to her parents being poor. I told her clothes are different as you wash them before wearing them which she sharply replied 'well I'll wash these shoes if you're going to make such a big deal about it' and changed the subject. I'm starting to feel a bit bad now for what I said as she genuinely seemed hurt ######

Response:
 YTA big time.  People wearing second hand shoes is quite normal, and there was likely long enough that any 'germs' wouldnt be an issue anyway (or else you'd certainly smell it).

Really a mean and entitled thing to say, I feel bad for her.  I can't see anyone giving you anything but a YTA here and you'll probably break the rules by deleting it shortly.

Also - ever tried on clothes or shoes in a store?  yeah, you werent the first to try that on - and as I said, its likely the original owner hasnt worn them in ages but its possible 5 other people tried on that shoe that day. ######


Prompt:
Yesterday, I (26 m) and my partner (22 f) were driving to my parents’ house for lunch. As I was driving down the main road of the village we live in, a little girl (maybe 4ish?) suddenly shot off across the road in front of the car.

I absolutely slammed down on the brakes, the car lurched and squealed, my partner who was speaking choked as the seatbelt tightened around her and it was all very sudden and frightening.

I pounded my fist on the horn at the girl and rolled down the window at the visibly terrified mother who ran out to pull her back. I was really furious and started properly shouting at her, don’t remember exactly what was said but something like “Watch your child you fucking stupid bitch!”

We rolled the window back up and carried on, but my partner was annoyed at me. She said I really shouldn’t have shouted and sworn at the mother and that she was very young (she looked like very early 20s) and must be really stressed rn. I said that she would have been a hell of a lot more stressed if her daughter had been killed because she couldn’t look after her properly.

It blew up into quite an argument with her defending the mum, saying that the horn would have scared her enough and that it was really unnecessary for me to scream at her like that.

I admit that I was slightly out of control with anger, but considering I very nearly killed a child because of her mother’s negligence and that shouting at her was not only justified because of the situation, but useful to startle her into keeping better hold of her daughter in future.

AITA? ######

Response: YTA because you're the type of person who thinks it's ever, ever ok to call a woman a "stupid bitch", much less in front of her child. It's even worse that you think being "out of control with anger" justifies your behaviour. That's a major red flag. Do better. ######


Prompt:
Myself (60M), my wife of 5 years, my son and his wife went out for lunch for my son’s birthday. I invited him because I wanted to see him on his birthday but knew they had plans to go away for the night later.

We didn’t drink, so the bill came out to about $80. When the check came, my son pulled out cash, as did I. I looked at the bill for a bit without speaking, then he said “should we split it?” I said that worked for me.

My wife got upset and told him that we would never let him pay for his birthday lunch. He said he was happy we were able to come and still have me half the money. I took it, because he had the opportunity to say he wanted me to pay, but my wife is now really upset and saying I acted cheap. Also, my son and his wife are both $25. They’re not super well off but both have jobs out of college, if that makes a difference. AITA for letting him pay half? ######

Response: YTA because you should know by this point in your life that when you invite someone for something, especially out to a celebratory dinner or something along that vein, that you pay. ######


Prompt:
My wife is admittedly a gold digger and a damn good one. She always dated men who could take care of her and when I met her she was definitely looking for a husband to keep that up. I don’t care and I don’t think it means we never fell in love but she knew what she wanted.

Most of the women in my circle don’t like her for obvious reasons but it’s been thirteen years and two children. I rarely use social media but she was showing me something on her Instagram the other day and I noticed that her bio said “mom, part time artist, full time gold digger” I told her that’s kind of embarrassing when I’m a respected professional and I already get enough shit for marrying her. She said I’m being prudish and stifling her. ######

Response: YTA because you know what you signed up for. Both of you sound awful though. You married a shallow person and are shocked that's what you got? LOL. ######