diff --git "a/resources/philosophy/Osho - the Book of secrets.txt" "b/resources/philosophy/Osho - the Book of secrets.txt" new file mode 100644--- /dev/null +++ "b/resources/philosophy/Osho - the Book of secrets.txt" @@ -0,0 +1,61049 @@ +Vigyan Bhairav Tantra +Chapter 1 : The World of Tantra + +SUTRA: + +DEVI ASKS: + +OH SHIVA, WHAT IS YOUR REALITY? + +WHAT IS THIS WONDER-FILLED UNIVERSE? + +WHAT CONSTITUTES SEED? + +WHO CENTERS THE UNIVERSAL WHEEL? + +WHAT IS THIS LIFE BEYOND FORM PERVADING FORMS? + +HOW MAY WE ENTER IT FULLY, ABOVE SPACE AND TIME, NAMES AND +DESCRIPTIONS? + +LET MY DOUBTS BE CLEARED! + +Some introductory points. First, the world of VIGYANA BHAIRAVA TANTRA is not +intellectual, it is not philosophical. Doctrine is meaningless to it. It is concerned with +method, with technique — not with principles at all. The word 'tantra’ means technique, +the method, the path. So it is not philosophical — note this. It is not concerned with +intellectual problems and inquiries. It is not concerned with the "why" of things, it is +concerned with "how"; not with what is truth, but how the truth can be attained. +TANTRA means technique. So this treatise is a scientific one. Science is not concerned +with why, science is concerned with how. That is the basic difference between +philosophy and science. Philosophy asks, "Why this existence?" Science asks, "How this +existence?" The moment you ask the question, how?, method, technique, become +important. Theories become meaningless; experience becomes the center. + +Tantra is science, tantra is not philosophy. To understand philosophy is easy because +only your intellect is required. + +If you can understand language, if you can understand concept, you can understand +philosophy. You need not change; you require no transfonnation. As you are, you can +understand philosophy — but not tantra. + +You will need a change... rather, a mutation. Unless YOU are different tantra cannot be +understood, because tantra is not an intellectual proposition, it is an experience. Unless +you are receptive, ready, vulnerable to the experience, it is not going to come to you. +Philosophy is concerned with the mind. Your head is enough; your totality is not +required. Tantra needs you in your totality. It is a deeper challenge. You will have to be +in it wholly. It is not fragmentary. A different approach, a different attitude, a different +mind to receive it is required. Because of this, Devi is asking apparently philosophical +questions. Tantra starts with Devi's questions. All the questions can be tackled +philosophically. + +Really, any question can be tackled in two ways: philosophically or totally, antellectually +or existentially. For example, if someone asks, "What is love?" you can tackle it +intellectually, you can discuss, you can propose theories, you can argue for a particular +hypothesis. You can create a system, a doctrine — and you may not have known love at +all. + +To create a doctrine, experience is not needed. Really, on the contrary, the less you know +the better because then you can propose a system unhesitatingly. + + + +Only a blind man can easily define what light is. When you do not know you are bold. +Ignorance is always bold; knowledge hesitates. And the more you know, the more you +feel that the ground underneath is dissolving. The more you know, the more you feel how +ignorant you are. And those who are really wise, they become ignorant. They become as +simple as children, or as simple as idiots. + +The less you know, the better. To be philosophical, to be dogmatic, to be doctrinaire — +this is easy. To tackle a problem intellectually is very easy. But to tackle a problem +existentially — not just to think about it, but to live it through, to go through it, to allow +yourself to be transformed through it — is difficult. That is, to know love one will have to +be in love. That is dangerous because you will not remain the same. The experience is +going to change you. The moment you enter love, you enter a different person. And when +you come out you will not be able to recognize your old face; it will not belong to you. A +discontinuity will have happened. Now there is a gap, the old man is dead and the new +man has come. That is what is kn own as rebirth — being twice-bom. + +Tantra is non-philosophical and existential. So of course Devi asks questions which +appear to be philosophical, but Shiva is not going to answer them that way. So it is better +to understand it in the beginning; otherwise you will be puzzled, because Shiva is not +going to answer a single question. + +All the questions that Devi is asking, Shiva is not going to answer at all. And still he +answers! And really, only he has answered them and no one else — but on a different +plane. + +Devi asks, "What is your reality, my lord?" He is not going to answer it. On the contrary, +he will give a technique. And if Devi goes through this technique, she will know. So the +answer is round-about; it is not direct. He is not going to answer "Who am I." He will +give a technique — do it and you will know. + +For tantra, doing is knowing, and there is no other knowing. Unless you do something, +unless you change, unless you have a different perspective to look at, to look with, unless +you move in an altogether different dimension than the intellect, there is no answer. +Answers can be given — they are all lies. All philosophies are lies. You ask a question +and the philosophy gives you an answer. It satisfies you or doesn't satisfy you. If it +satisfies you, you become a convert to the philosophy, but you remain the same. If it +doesn't satisfy you, you go on searching for some other philosophy to be converted to. + +But you remain the same; you are not touched at all, you are not changed. + +So whether you are a Hindu or a Mohammedan or a Christian or a Jain, it makes no +difference. The real person behind the facade of a Hindu or a Mohammedan or a +Christian is the same. Only words differ, or clothes. + +The man who is going to the church or to the temple or to the mosque is the same man. +Only faces differ, and they are faces which are false; they are masks. Behind the masks +you will find the same man — the same anger, the same aggression, the same violence, +the same greed, the same lust — everything the same. Is Mohammedan sexuality different +from Hindu sexuality? Is Christian violence different from Hindu violence? It is the +same! The reality remains the same; only clothes differ. + +Tantra is not concerned with your clothes, tantra is concerned with you. If you ask a +question it shows where you are. It shows also that wherever you are you cannot see; that +is why there is the question. A blind man asks, "What is light?" and philosophy will start +answering what is light. Tantra will know only this: if a man is asking "What is light?" it + + + +shows only that he is blind. Tantra will start operating on the man, changing the man, so +that he can see. Tantra will not say what is light. Tantra will tell how to attain insight, +how to attain seeing, how to attain vision. When the vision is there, the answer will be +there. Tantra will not give you the answer; tantra will give you the technique to attain the +answer. + +Now, this answer is not going to be intellectual. If you say something about light to a +blind man, this is intellectual. If the blind man himself becomes capable of seeing, this is +existential. + +This is what I mean when I say that tantra is existential. So Shiva is not going to answer +Devi's questions, still, he will answer — the first thing. + +The second thing: this is a different type of language. You must know something about it +before we enter into it. All the tantra treatises are dialogues between Shiva and Devi. + +Devi questions and Shiva answers. All the tantra treatises start that way. Why? Why this +method? It is very significant. It is not a dialogue between a teacher and a disciple, it is a +dialogue between two lovers. And tantra signifies through it a very meaningful thing: that +the deeper teachings cannot be given unless there is love between the two — the disciple +and the master. The disciple and master must become deep lovers. Only then can the +higher, the beyond, be expressed. + +So it is a language of love; the disciple must be in an attitude of love. But not only this, +because friends can be lovers. Tantra says a disciple moves as receptivity, so the disciple +must be in a feminine receptivity; only then is something possible. You need not be a +woman to be a disciple, but you need to be in a feminine attitude of receptivity. When +Devi asks, it means the feminine attitude asks. Why this emphasis on the feminine +attitude? + +Man and woman are not only physically different, they are psychologically different. Sex +is not only a difference in the body; it is a difference in psychologies also. + +A feminine mind means receptivity — total receptivity, surrender, love. A disciple needs a +feminine psychology; otherwise he will not be able to learn. You can ask, but if you are +not open then you cannot be answered. You can ask a question and still remain closed. +Then the answer cannot penetrate you. Your doors are closed; you are dead. You are not +open. + +A feminine receptivity means a womb-like receptivity in the inner depth, so that you can +receive. And not only that — much more is implied. A woman is not only receiving +something, the moment she receives it, it becomes a part of her body. A child is received. +A woman conceives; the moment there is conception, the child has become part of the +feminine body. It is not alien, it is not foreign. It has been absorbed. Now the child will +live not as something added to the mother, but just as a part, just as the mother. And the +child is not only received: the feminine body becomes creative; the child begins to grow. +A disciple needs a womb-like receptivity. Whatsoever is received is not to be gathered as +dead knowledge. It must grow in you; it must become blood and bones in you. It must +become a part, now. It must grow! This growth will change you, will transform you — the +receiver. That is why tantra uses this device. Every treatise starts with Devi asking a +question and Shiva replying to it. Devi is Shiva's consort, his feminine part. + + +One thing more.... Now modern psychology, depth psychology particularly, says that + + + +man is both man and woman. No one is just male and no one is just female; everyone is +bi-sexual. Both sexes are there. This is a very recent research in the West, but for tantra +this has been one of the most basic concepts for thousands of years. You must have seen +some pictures of Shiva as ARDHANARISHWAR — half man, half woman. There is no +other concept like it in the whole history of man. Shiva is depicted as half man, half +woman. + +So Devi is not just a consort, she is Shiva's other half. And unless a disciple becomes the +other half of the master it is impossible to convey the higher teachings, the esoteric +methods. When you become one then there is no doubt. When you are one with the +master — so totally one, so deeply one — there is no argument, no logic, no reason. One +simply absorbs; one becomes a womb. And then the teaching begins to grow in you and +change you. + +That is why tantra is written in love language. Something must also be understood about +love language. There are two types of language: logical language and love language. +There are basic differences between the two. + +Logical language is aggressive, argumentative, violent. If I use logical language I become +aggressive upon your mind. I try to convince you, to convert you, to make a puppet of +you. + +My argument is "right" and you are "wrong." Logical language is egocentric: "I am right +and you are wrong, so I must prove that I am right and you are wrong." I am not +concerned with you, I am concerned with my ego. My ego is always "right." + +Love language is totally different. I am not concerned with my ego; I am concerned with +you. I am not concerned to prove something, to strengthen my ego. I am concerned to +help you. It is a compassion to help you to grow, to help you to transform, to help you to +be reborn. + +Secondly, logic will always be intellectual. Concepts and principles will be significant, +arguments will be significant. With love language what is said is not so significant; +rather, it is the way it is said. The container, the word is not important; the content, the +message is more important. It is a heart-to-heart talk, not a mind-to-mind discussion. It is +not a debate, it is a communion. + +So this is rare: Devi is sitting in the lap of Shiva and asking, and Shiva answers. It is a +love dialogue — no conflict, as if Shiva is speaking to himself. Why this emphasis on love +— love language? Because if you are in love with your master, then the whole gestalt +changes; it becomes different. Then you are not hearing his words. Then you are drinking +him. Then words are irrelevant. Really, the silence between the words becomes more +significant. What he is saying may be meaningful or it may not be meaningful. + +.. but it is his eyes, his gestures, his compassion, his love. + +That is why tantra has a fixed device, a structure. Every treatise starts with Devi asking +and Shiva answering. No argument is going to be there, no wastage of words. There are +very simple statements of fact, telegraphic messages with no view to convince, but just to +relate. + +If you encounter Shiva with a question with a closed mind, he will not answer you in this +way. First your closedness has to be broken. Then he will have to be aggressive. Then +your prejudices, then your preconceptions have to be destroyed. Unless you are cleared +completely of your past, nothing can be given to you. But this is not so with his consort +Devi; with Devi there is no past. + + + +Remember, when you are deeply in love your mind ceases to be. There is no past; only +the present moment becomes everything. When you are in love the present is the only +time, the now is all — no past, no future. So Devi is just open. There is no defense — +nothing to be cleared, nothing to be destroyed. The ground is ready, only a seed has to be +dropped. The ground is not only ready, but welcoming, receptive, asking to be +impregnated. + +So all these sayings that we are going to discuss will be telegraphic. They are just sutras, +but each sutra, each telegraphic message given by Shiva is worth a Veda, worth a Bible, +worth a Koran. Each single sentence can become the base of a great scripture. + +Scriptures are logical — you have to propose, defend, argue. Here there is no argument, +just simple statements of love. + +Thirdly, the very words VIGYANA BHAIRAVA TANTRA mean the technique of going +beyond consciousness. VIGYANA means consciousness, BHAIRAVA means the state +which is beyond consciousness, and TANTRA means the method: the method of going +beyond consciousness. This is the supreme doctrine — without any doctrine. + +We are unconscious, so all the religious teachings are concerned with how to go beyond +unconsciousness, how to be conscious. For example, Krishnamurti, Zen, they are all +concerned with how to create more consciousness, because we are unconscious. So how +to be more aware, alert? From unconsciousness, how to move toward consciousness? + +But tantra says that this is a duality — unconscious and conscious. If you move from +unconsciousness to consciousness, you are moving from one duality to another. Move +beyond both! Unless you move beyond both you can never reach the ultimate, so be +neither the unconscious nor the conscious; just go beyond, just be. Be neither the +conscious nor the unconscious — just BE! This is going beyond yoga, going beyond Zen, +going beyond all teachings. + +’Vigyana’ means consciousness, and ’bhairava' is a specific term, a tantra term for one +who has gone beyond. That is why Shiva is known as Bhairava and Devi is known as +Bhairavi — those who have gone beyond the dualities. + + +In our experience only love can give a glimpse. That is why love becomes the very basic +device to impart tantric wisdom. In our experience we can say that only love is something +which goes beyond duality. When two persons are in love, the deeper they move into it, +the less and less they are two, the more and more they become one. And a point comes +and a peak is reached when only apparently they are two. Inwardly they are one; the +duality is transcended. + +Only in this sense does Jesus' saying that "God is love" become meaningful; otherwise +not. In our experience love is nearest to God. It is not that God is loving, as Christians go +on interpreting — that God has a fatherly love for you. Nonsense! "God is love" is a +tantric statement. It means love is the only reality in our experience which reaches +nearest to God, to the divine. Why? Because in love oneness is felt. Bodies remain two, +but something beyond the bodies merges and becomes one. + +That is why there is so much hankering after sex. The real hankering is after oneness, but +that oneness is not sexual. In sex two bodies have only a deceptive feeling of becoming +one, but they are not one, they are only joined together. But for a single moment two +bodies forget themselves in each other, and a certain physical oneness is felt. This +hankering is not bad, but to stop at it is dangerous. This hankering shows a deeper urge to + + + +feel oneness. + + +In love, on a higher plane, the inner one moves, merges into the other, and there is a +feeling of oneness. Duality dissolves. Only in this non-dual love can we have a glimpse +of what is the state of a Bhairava. We may say that the state of a Bhairava is absolute +love with no coming back, from the peak of love there is no falling back. It is remaining +on the peak. + +We have made Shiva's abode on Kailash. That is simply symbolic: it is the highest peak, +the holiest peak. We have made it Shiva's abode. We can go there but we will have to +come down, it cannot be our abode. We can go on a pilgrimage. It is a TEERTHYATRA +— a pilgrimage, a journey. We can touch for a single moment the highest peak; then we +will have to come back. + +In love this holy pilgrimage happens, but not for all because almost no one moves beyond +sex. So we go on living in the valley, the dark valley. Sometimes someone moves to the +peak of love, but then he falls back because it is so dizzying. It is so high and you are so +low,, and it is so difficult to live there. Those who have loved, they know how difficult it +is to be constantly in love. One has to come back again and again. It is Shiva's abode. He +lives there; it is his home. + +A Bhairava lives in love; that is his abode. When I say that is his abode, I mean now he is +not even aware of love — because if you live on Kailash you will not be aware that this is +Kailash, this is a peak. + +The peak becomes a plain. Shiva is not aware of love. We are aware of love because we +live in non-love. And because of the contrast we feel love. Shiva IS love. The state of +Bhairava means that one has become love, not loving; one has become LOVE, one lives +on the peak. The peak has become his abode. + +How to make this highest peak possible: beyond duality, beyond unconsciousness, +beyond consciousness, beyond the body and beyond the soul, beyond the world and +beyond the so-called MOKSHA — liberation? How to reach this peak? The technique is +tantra. But tantra is pure technique, so it is going to be difficult to understand. First let us +understand the questions, what Devi is asking. + +OH SHIVA, WHAT IS YOUR REALITY? Why this question? You can also ask this +question, but it will not carry the same meaning. So try to understand why Devi asks, +WHAT IS YOUR REALITY? Devi is in deep love. When you are in deep love, for the +first time you encounter the inner reality. Then Shiva is not the fonn, then Shiva is not +the body. When you are in love, the body of the beloved falls away, disappears. The fonn +is no more and the formless is revealed. You are facing an abyss. That is why we are so +afraid of love. We can face a body, we can face a face, we can face a fonn, but we are +afraid of facing an abyss. + +If you love someone, if you really love, his body is bound to disappear. + +In some moments of climax, of peak, the form will dissolve, and through the beloved you +will enter the formless. That is why we are afraid — it is falling into a bottomless abyss. + +So this question is not just a simple curiosity: OH SHIVA, WHAT IS YOUR REALITY? +Devi must have fallen in love with the form. Things start that way. She must have loved +this man as a man, and now when the love has come of age, when the love has flowered, + + + +this man has disappeared. He has become formless. Now he is to be found nowhere. OH +SHIVA, WHAT IS YOUR REALITY? It is a question asked in a very intense love +moment. And when questions are raised, they become different according to the mind in +which they are asked. + +So create the situation, the milieu of the question in your mind. Devi must be at a loss — +Shiva has disappeared. When love reaches its peak the lover disappears. Why does this +happen? This happens because really, everyone is fonnless. You are not a body. You +move as a body, you live as a body, but you are not a body. When we see someone from +the outside, he is a body. Love penetrates within. Then we are not seeing the person from +the outside. Love can see a person as the person can see himself from within. Then the +form disappears. + +A Zen monk, Rinzai, attained his enlightenment, and the first thing he asked was, "Where +is my body? Where has my body gone?" And he began to search. + +He called his disciples and said, "Go and find out where my body is. I have lost my +body." + +He had entered the formless. You are also a fonnless existence, but you know yourself +not directly, but from others' eyes. You know through the mirror. Sometime, while +looking in the minor, close your eyes and then think, meditate: if there was no minor, +how could you have known your face? If there was no mirror, there would have been no +face. You do not have a face; mirrors give you faces. Think of a world where there are no +mirrors. You are alone — no mirror at all, not even others' eyes working as mirrors. You +are alone on a lonely island; nothing can mirror you. Then will you have any face? Or +will you have any body? You cannot have one. You do not have one at all. We know +ourselves only through others, and the others can only know the outer form. That is why +we become identified with it. + +Another Zen mystic, Hui-Hai used to say to his disciples, "When you have lost your head +meditating, come immediately to me. When you lose your head, come immediately to +me. When you begin to feel there is no head, do not be afraid; come immediately to me. +This is the right moment. Now something can be taught to you." With a head, no teaching +is possible. The head always comes in between. + +Devi asks Shiva, OH SHIVA, WHAT IS YOUR REALITY? - who are you? The form +has disappeared; hence the question. + +In love you enter the other as himself. It is not you answering. You become one, and for +the first time you know an abyss — a formless presence. + +That is why for centuries together, centuries and centuries, we were not making any +sculptures, any pictures of Shiva. We were only making SHIVALINGA — the symbol. +The Shivalinga is just a formless form. When you love someone, when you enter +someone, he becomes just a luminous presence. The Shivalinga is just a luminous +presence, just an aura of light. + +That is why Devi asks, WHAT IS YOUR REALITY? + +WHAT IS THIS WONDER-FILLED UNIVERSE? We know the universe, but we never +know it as wonder-filled. Children know, lovers know. Sometimes poets and madmen +know. We do not know that the world is wonder-filled. Everything is just repetitive — no +wonder, no poetry, just flat prose. It doesn’t create a song in you; it doesn’t create a dance +in you; it doesn't give birth to the poetry inside. The whole universe looks mechanical. + + + +Children look at it with wonder-filled eyes. When the eyes are wonder-filled, the +universe is wonder-filled. + +When you are in love, you again become like children. Jesus says, "Only those who are +like children will enter my kingdom of God." Why? Because if the universe is not a +wonder, you cannot be religious. The universe can be explained — then your approach is +scientific. The universe is either known or unknown, but that which is unknown can be +known any day; it is not unknowable. + +The universe becomes unknowable, a mystery, only when your eyes are wonder-filled. +Devi says, WHAT IS THIS WONDER-FILLED UNIVERSE? Suddenly there is the +jump from a personal question to a very impersonal one. She was asking, WHAT IS +YOUR REALITY? and then suddenly, WHAT IS THIS WONDER-FILLED +UNIVERSE? + +When fonn disappears, your beloved becomes the universe, the formless, the infinite. +Suddenly Devi becomes aware that she is not asking a question about Shiva; she is +asking a question about the whole universe. Now Shiva has become the whole universe. +Now all the stars are moving in him, and the whole firmament and the whole space is +surrounded by him. Now he is the great engulfing factor — "the great encompassing." +Karl Jaspers has defined God as "the great encompassing." + +When you enter into love, into a deep, intimate world of love, the person disappears, the +form disappears, and the lover becomes just a door to the universe. Your curiosity can be +a scientific one — then you have to approach through logic. Then you must not think of +the formless. Then beware of the formless; then remain content with the fonn. Science is +always concerned with the form. If anything formless is proposed to a scientific mind, he +will cut it into form — unless it takes a form it is meaningless. First give it a fonn, a +definite fonn; only then does the inquiry start. + +In love, if there is form then there is no end to it. + +Dissolve the fonn! When things become formless, dizzy, without boundaries, every thing +entering another, the whole universe becoming a oneness, then only is it a wonder-filled +universe. + +WHAT CONSTITUTES SEED? Then Devi goes on. From the universe she goes on to +ask, WHAT CONSTITUTES SEED? This formless, wonder-filled universe, from where +does it come? From where does it originate? Or does it NOT originate? What is the seed? + +WHO CENTERS THE UNIVERSAL WHEEL? asks Devi. This wheel goes on moving +and moving — this great change, this constant flux. But who centers this wheel? Where is +the axis, the center, the unmoving center? + +She doesn’t stop for any answer. She goes on asking as if she is not asking anyone, as if +talking to herself. + +WHAT IS THIS LIFE BEYOND FORM PERVADING FORMS? + +HOW MAY WE ENTER IT FULLY, ABOVE SPACE AND TIME, NAMES AND +DESCRIPTION? + +LET MY DOUBTS BE CLEARED. The emphasis is not on questions but on doubts: + +LET MY DOUBTS BE CLEARED! This is very significant. If you are asking an +intellectual question, you are asking for a definite answer so that your problem is solved. + + + +But Devi says, LET MY DOUBTS BE CLEARED. She is not really asking about +answers. She is asking for a transformation of her mind, because a doubting mind will +remain a doubting mind whatsoever answers are given. Note it: a doubting mind will +remain a doubting mind. + +Answers are irrelevant. If I give you one answer and you have a doubting mind, you will +doubt it. If I give you another answer, you will doubt that also. You have a doubting +mind. A doubting mind means you will put a question mark to anything. + +So answers are useless. You ask me, "Who created the world?" and I tell you "A" created +the world. Then you are bound to ask, "Who created 'A'?" So the real problem is not how +to answer questions. The real problem is how to change the doubting mind, how to create +a mind which is not doubting — or, which is trustful. So Devi says, LET MY DOUBTS +BE CLEARED. + +Two or three things more.... When you ask a question, you may be asking for many +reasons. One may be just this, that you want a confirmation. You already know the +answer, you have the answer, you just want it to be confirmed that your answer is right. +Then your question is false, pseudo; it is not a question. You may be asking a question +not because you are ready to change yourself, but just as a curiosity. + +The mind goes on questioning. In the mind questions come as leaves come on a tree. That +is the very nature of the mind — to question. So it goes on questioning. It matters not +what you are questioning, with anything given to the mind it will create a question. It is a +machine to grind out, to create questions. So give it anything and it will cut it into pieces +and create many questions. + +One question answered, and the mind will create many questions from the answer. This +has been the whole history of philosophy. + +Bertrand Russell remembers that when he was a child he thought that one day, when he +will be mature enough to understand all philosophy, all questions will be answered. Then +later, when he was eighty, he said, "Now I can say that my own questions are there +standing, as they were standing when I was a child. No other questions have come up +because of these theories of philosophy." So he said, "When I was young I used to say, +philosophy is an inquiry for ultimate answers. Now I cannot say it. It is an inquiry for +endless questions." + +So one question creates one answer and many questions. The doubting mind is the +problem. Devi says, "Do not be concerned with my questions. I have asked so many +things: What is your reality? What is this wonder-filled universe? What constitutes seed? +Who centers the universal wheel? What is life beyond fonn? How can we enter it fully +above time and space? But do not be concerned with my questions. Let my doubts be +cleared. I ask these questions because they are in my mind. I ask them just to show you +my mind, but do not pay much attention to them. Really, answers will not fulfill my need. +My need is... let my doubts be cleared." + +But how can the doubts be cleared? Will any answer do? Is there any answer which will +clear your doubts? Mind IS the doubt. + +It is not that the mind doubts, mind is the doubt! Unless the mind dissolves, doubts +cannot be cleared. + +Shiva will answer. His answers are techniques — the oldest, most ancient techniques. But +you can call them the latest also because nothing can be added to them. They are + + + +complete — one hundred and twelve techniques. They have taken in all the possibilities, +all the ways of cleaning the mind, transcending the mind. Not a single method could be +added to Shiva's one hundred and twelve methods. And this book, VIGYANA +BHAIRAVA TANTRA, is five thousand years old. Nothing can be added; there is no +possibility to add anything. It is exhaustive, complete. It is the most ancient and yet the +latest, yet the newest. Old like old hills — the methods seem eternal — and they are new +like a dewdrop before the sun, because they are so fresh. + +These one hundred and twelve methods of meditation constitute the whole science of +transfonning mind. We will enter them one by one. We will try to comprehend first +intellectually. But use your intellect only as an instrument, not as a master. Use it as an +instrument to understand something, but do not go on creating barriers with it. When we +will be talking about these techniques, just put aside your past knowledge, your knowing, +whatsoever information you have collected. Put them aside — they are just dust gathered +on the road. + +Encounter these methods with a fresh mind — with alertness, of course, but not with +argumentation. + +And do not create the fallacy that an argumentative mind is an alert mind. It is not, +because the moment you move into arguments you have lost the awareness, you have lost +the alertness. Then you are not here. + +These methods do not belong to any religion. Remember, they are not Hindu, just as the +theory of relativity is not Jewish because Einstein conceived it. And radio and television +are not Christian. No one says, "Why are you using electricity? This is Christian, because +a Christian mind conceived it." Science does not belong to races and religions — and +tantra is a science. So remember, this is not Hindu at all. These techniques were +conceived by Hindus, but these techniques are not Hindu. That is why these techniques +will not mention any religious ritual. No temple is needed. You are quite enough of a +temple yourself. You are the lab; the whole experiment is to go on within you. No belief +is needed. + +This is not religion, this is science. No belief is needed. It is not required to believe in the +Koran or the Vedas or in Buddha or in Mahavira. No, no belief is needed. Only a +daringness to experiment is enough, courage to experiment is enough; that is the beauty. +A Mohammedan can practice and he will reach to the deeper meanings of the Koran. A +Hindu can practice and he will for the first time know what the Vedas are. And a Jain can +practice and a Buddhist can practice; they need not leave their religion. + +Tantra will fulfill them, wherever they are. Tantra will be helpful, whatsoever their +chosen path. + +So remember this, tantra is pure science. You may be a Hindu or a Mohammedan or a +Parsee or whatsoever — tantra doesn't touch your religion at all. Tantra says that religion +is a social affair. So belong to any religion; it is irrelevant. But you can transform +yourself, and that transformation needs a scientific methodology. When you are ill, when +you have fallen ill or you have caught tuberculosis or anything, then whether you are a +Hindu or a Mohammedan makes no difference. The tuberculosis remains indifferent to +your Hinduism, to your Mohammedanism, to your beliefs — political, social or religious. +Tuberculosis has to be treated scientifically. There is no Hindu tuberculosis, no +Mohammedan tuberculosis. + +You are ignorant, you are in conflict, you are asleep. This is a disease, a spiritual disease. + + + +This disease has to be treated by the tantra. You are irrelevant, your beliefs are irrelevant. +It is just a coincidence that you are born somewhere and someone else is bom somewhere +else. This is just a coincidence. Your religion is a coincidence, so do not cling to it. Use +some scientific methods to transfonn yourself. + +Tantra is not very well known. And even if it is known, it is very much misunderstood. +There are reasons for it. The higher and purer a science, the less is the possibility that the +masses will know of it. + +We have only heard the name of the theory of relativity. It used to be said that only +twelve persons understood it when Einstein was alive. All over the world only one dozen +minds could understand it. It was difficult even for Albert Einstein to make it understood +to someone, to make it understandable, because it moves so high, it goes above your +head. But it can be understood. A technical, mathematical knowledge is needed; a +training is needed, and then it can be understood. But tantra is more difficult because no +training will help. Only transformation can help. + +That is why tantra could never become understood by the masses. And it always happens +that when you cannot understand a thing, at least you will misunderstand, because then +you can feel, "Okay, I understand." You cannot simply remain in the vacuum. + +Secondly, when you cannot understand a thing, you begin to abuse it because it insults +you. You cannot understand it! You? YOU cannot understand it? That is impossible. +Something must be wrong with the thing itself. One begins to abuse, one begins to talk +nonsense, and then he feels, "Now it is okay." + +So tantra was not understood; tantra was misunderstood. It was so deep and so high that +this was natural. Secondly, because tantra moves beyond duality, the very standpoint is +amoral. Please understand this word: 'moral', 'immoral', 'amoral'. We understand morality, +we understand immorality, but it becomes difficult if something is amoral — beyond both. + + +Tantra is amoral. Look at it in this way.... A medicine is amoral; it is neither moral nor +immoral. If you give it to a thief it will help; if you give it to a saint it will help. It will +make no differentiation between a thief and a saint. The medicine cannot say, "This is a +thief so I am going to kill him, and this is a saint so I am going to help him." A medicine +is a scientific thing. Your being a thief or being a saint is irrelevant. + +Tantra is amoral. Tantra says, no morality is needed — no particular morality is needed. +On the contrary, you are immoral because you have a very disturbed mind. So tantra +cannot make a precondition, that first you become moral and then you can practice tantra. +Tantra says, this is absurd. + +Someone is ill, feverish, and the doctor comes and says, "First bring down your fever; +first be quite healthy. Only then can I give you the medicine." This is what is happening. +One thief comes to a saint and he says, "I am a thief. Tell me how to meditate." The saint +says, "First leave your profession. How can you meditate if you remain a thief?" + +One alcoholic comes and he says, "I am an alcoholic. How can I meditate?" The saint +says, "The first condition is, leave alcohol, only then can you meditate." The conditions +become suicidal. The man is alcoholic or a thief or immoral because he has a disturbed +mind, an ill mind. + + +These are the effects, the consequences of the diseased mind, and he is told, "First be +well and then you can meditate." But then who needs meditation? Meditation is + + + +medicinal. It is a medicine. + +Tantra is amoral. It doesn’t ask you who you are. Your being a man is enough. Wherever +you are, whatsoever you are, you are accepted. + +Choose a technique which fits you, put your total energy into it, and you will not be the +same again. Real, authentic techniques always will be like that. If I make preconditions, it +shows I have a pseudo technique — I say, "First do this and first do not do that, and +then..." And those are impossible conditions because a thief can change his objects, but +be cannot become a non-thief. + +A greedy man can change the objects of his greed, but he cannot become non-greedy. + +You can force him or he can force upon himself non-greed, but it is also only because of +a certain greed. If heaven is promised he may even try to be non-greedy. But this is greed +par excellence. Heaven, MOKSHA — liberation; SATCHITANANDA — existence, +consciousness, bliss, they will be the objects of his greed. + +Tantra says, you cannot change man unless you give him authentic techniques with +which to change. Just by preaching nothing is changed. And you can see this all over the +world. Whatsoever tantra says is written all over the world — so much preaching, so +much moralizing, so many priests, preachers. + +The whole world is filled with them, yet everything is so ugly and so immoral. + +Why is this happening? The same will be the case if you give your hospitals to preachers. +They will go there and they will start preaching. And they will make every ill man feel, +"You are guilty! You have created this disease; now change this disease." If preachers are +given hospitals, what will be the condition of hospitals? The same as the condition of the +whole world. + +Preachers go on preaching. They go on telling people, "Don't be angry," without giving +any technique. And we have heard this teaching for so long that we never even raise the +question: "What are you saying? I am angry and you simply say, 'Don't be angry.' How is +this possible? When I am angry it means 'I' am anger, and you just tell me, 'Don’t be +angry.’ So I can only suppress myself." + +But that will create more anger. That will create guilt — because if I try to change and +cannot change myself, that creates inferiority. It gives me a feeling of guilt, that I am +incapable, I cannot win over my anger. No one can win! You need certain weapons, you +need certain techniques, because your anger is just an indication of a disturbed mind. +Change the disturbed mind and the indication will change. Anger is just showing what is +within. Change the within and the without will change. + +So tantra is not concerned with your so-called morality. + +Really, to emphasize morality is mean, degrading; it is inhuman. If someone comes to me +and I say, "Leave anger first, leave sex first, leave this and that," then I am inhuman. + +What I am saying is impossible. And that impossibility will make that man feel inwardly +mean. He will begin to feel inferior; he will be degraded inside in his own eyes. If he tries +the impossible, he is going to be a failure. And when he is a failure he will be convinced +that he is a sinner. + +The preachers have convinced the whole world that "You are sinners." This is good for +them, because unless you are convinced, their profession cannot continue. You must be +sinners: only then can churches, temples and mosques continue to prosper. Your being in +sin is their success. Your guilt is the base of all the highest churches. The more guilty you +are, the more churches will go on rising higher and higher. They are built on your guilt, + + + +on your sin, on your inferiority complex. Thus, they have created an inferior humanity. +Tantra is not concerned with your so-called morality, your social formalities, etc. That +doesn’t mean that tantra says to be immoral — no! Tantra is so much unconcerned with +your morality that tantra cannot say to be immoral. Tantra gives you scientific techniques +for changing the mind, and once the mind is different your character will be different. +Once the basis of your structure changes, your whole edifice will be different. + +Because of this amoral attitude, tantra could not be tolerated by your so-called saints, +they all went against it — because if tantra succeeds, then all this nonsense which goes on +in the name of religion will have to stop. + +See this: Christianity fought very much against scientific progress. Why? Only because if +scientific progress is there in the material world, then the time is not very far off when in +the psychological and in the spiritual world also science will penetrate. So Christianity +started fighting scientific progress, because once you know that you can change matter +through technique, the time is not very far off when you will come to know that you can +change mind through techniques — because mind is nothing but subtle matter. + +This is tantra's proposition, that mind is nothing but subtle matter; it can be changed. And +once you have a different mind you have a different world, because you look through the +mind. The world you are seeing, you are seeing because of a particular mind. Change the +mind, and when you look there is a different world. And if there is no eind... that is the +ultimate for tantra, to bring about a state where there is no mind. Then look at the world +without a mediator. When the mediator is not, you are encountering the real, because now +no one is between you and the real. Then nothing can be distorted. + +So tantra says that when there is no mind, that is the state of a Bhairava — a no-mind +state. + +For the farst time you look at the world, at that which is. If you have a mind, you go on +CREATING a world; you go on imposing, projecting. So first change the mind, then +change from mind to no-mind. And these one hundred and twelve methods can help each +and everyone. Any particular method may not be of use to you. That is why Shiva goes +on relating many methods. Choose any one method which suits you. It is not difficult to +know which suits you. + +We will try to understand each method and how to choose for yourself one method which +can change you and your mind. This understanding, this intellectual understanding will +be a basic necessity, but this is not the end. Whatsoever I talk about here, try it. + +Really, when you try the right method it clicks immediately. So I will go on talking about +methods here every day. You try them. Just play with them — go home and try. The right +method, whenever you happen upon it, just clicks. Something explodes in you, and you +know that "This is the right method for me." But effort is needed, and you may be +surprised that suddenly one day one method has gripped you. + +So while I am talking here, parallel to it go on playing with these methods. I say playing +because you should not be too serious. Just play! Something may fit you. If it fits you, +then be serious, and then go deep into it — intensely, honestly, with all your energy, with +all your mind. + +But before that just play. + +I have found that while you are playing your mind is more open. While you are serious +your mind is not so open; it is closed. So just play. Do not be too serious, just play. And + + + +these methods are simple, you can just play with them. + +Take one method and play with it for at least three days. If it gives you a certain feeling +of affinity, if it gives you a certain feeling of well-being, if it gives you a certain feeling +that this is for you, then be serious about it. Then forget the others, do not play with other +methods. Stick to it — at least for three months. Miracles are possible. The only thing is +that the technique must be for you. If the technique is not for you, then nothing happens. +Then you may go on with it for lives together, but nothing will happen. If the method is +for you then even three minutes are enough. + +So these one hundred and twelve methods can be a miraculous experience for you, or +they may just be a listening — it depends on you. I will go on describing each method +from as many angles as possible. If you feel any affinity with it, play with it for three +days. If you feel that it fits, that something clicks in you, continue it for three months. +Life is a miracle. If you have not known its mystery, that only shows that you do not +know the technique for how to approach it. + +Shiva proposes one hundred and twelve methods. + +These are all the methods possible. If nothing clicks and nothing gives you the feeling +that this is for you, then there is no method left for you — remember this. Then forget +spirituality and be happy. Then it is not for you. + +But these one hundred and twelve methods are for the whole humanity — for all the ages +that have passed and for all the ages that have yet to come. In no time has there ever been +a single man, and there will never be one, who can say, "These one hundred and twelve +methods are all useless for me." Impossible! This is impossible! + +Every type of mind has been taken into account. Every possible type of mind has been +given a technique in tantra. There are many techniques for which no man exists yet; they +are for the future. There are many techniques for which no man exists now; they are for +the past. But do not be afraid. There are many methods which are for you. + +So we will start this journey from tomorrow. + + +THE END. + + + +Chapter 2: The Path of Yoga and the Path of Tantra + + +Many questions are there. + +The first: + +Question 1 + +WHAT IS THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN TRADITIONAL YOGA AND TANTRA? +ARE THEY THE SAME? + +Tantra and yoga are basically different. They reach to the same goal; however, their paths +are not only different, but contrary also. So this has to be understood very clearly. + +The yoga process is also methodology; yoga is also technique. Yoga is not philosophy, +just like tantra — yoga depends on action, method, technique. Doing leads to being in +yoga also, but the process is different. In yoga one has to fight; it is the path of the +warrior. On the path of tantra one does not have to fight at all. Rather, on the contrary, +one has to indulge — but with awareness. + +Yoga is suppression with awareness; tantra is indulgence with awareness. Tantra says +that whatsoever you are, the ultimate is not opposite to it. It is a growth; you can grow to +be the ultimate. There is no opposition between you and the reality. You are part of it, so +no struggle, no conflict, no opposition to nature is needed. You have to use nature; you +have to use whatsoever you are to go beyond. + +In yoga you have to fight with yourself to go beyond. In yoga, the world and MOKSHA, +liberation — you as you are and you as you can be — are two opposite things. Suppress, +fight, dissolve that which you are so that you can attain that which you can be. + +Going beyond is a death in yoga. You must die for your real being to be bom. + +In the eyes of tantra, yoga is a deep suicide. You must kill your natural self — your body, +your instincts, your desires, everything. Tantra says accept yourself as you are. It is a +deep acceptance. Do not create a gap between you and the real, between the world and +NIRVANA. Do not create any gap. There is no gap for tantra; no death is needed. For +your rebirth, no death is needed — rather, a transcendence. For this transcendence, use +yourself. + +For example, sex is there, the basic energy — the basic energy you are born through, bom +with. The basic cells of your being and of your body are sexual, so the human mind +revolves around sex. For yoga you must fight with this energy. Through fight you create +a different center in yourself. The more you fight, the more you become integrated in a +different center. Then sex is not your center. Fighting with sex — of course, consciously +— will create in you a new center of being, a new emphasis, a new crystallization. Then +sex will not be your energy. You will create your energy fighting with sex. A different +energy will come into being and a different center of existence. + +For tantra you have to use the energy of sex. Do not fight with it, transform it. Do not +think in terms of enmity, be friendly to it. It is your energy. It is not evil, it is not bad. + +Every energy is just natural. It can be used for you, it can be used against you. You can +make a block of it, a barrier, or you can make it a step. It can be used. Rightly used, it +becomes friendly; wrongly used, it becomes your enemy. But it is neither. Energy is just +natural. As ordinary man is using sex, it becomes an enemy, it destroys him; he simply +dissipates in it. + +Yoga takes the opposite view — opposite to the ordinary mind. The ordinary mind is + + + +being destroyed by its own desires, so yoga says stop desiring, be desireless. Fight desire +and create an integration in you which is desireless. + +Tantra says be aware of the desire; do not create any fight. Move in desire with full +consciousness, and when you move into desire with full consciousness you transcend it. +You are into it and still you are not in it. You pass through it, but you remain an outsider. +Yoga appeals much because yoga is just the opposite of the ordinary mind, so the +ordinary mind can understand the language of yoga. You know how sex is destroying you +— how it has destroyed you, how you go on revolving around it like a slave, like a +puppet. You know this by your experience. So when yoga says fight it, you immediately +understand the language. That is the appeal, the easy appeal of yoga. + +Tantra can not be so easily appealing. It seems difficult: how to move into desire without +being overwhelmed by it? How to be in the sex act consciously, with full awareness? The +ordinary mind becomes afraid. + +It seems dangerous. Not that it is dangerous; whatsoever you know about sex creates this +danger for you. You know yourself, you know how you can deceive yourself. You know +very well that your mind is cunning. You can move in desire, in sex, in everything, and +you can deceive yourself that you are moving with full awareness. That is why you feel +the danger. + +The danger is not in tantra; it is in you. And the appeal of yoga is because of you, +because of your ordinary mind, your sex-suppressed, sex-starved, sex-indulging mind. +Because the ordinary mind is not healthy about sex, yoga has an appeal. With a better +humanity, with a healthy sex — natural, normal — the case would be different. We are not +nonnal and natural. We are absolutely abnormal, unhealthy, really insane. But because +everyone is like us, we never feel it. + +Madness is so normal that not to be mad may look abnormal. A Buddha is abnormal, a +Jesus is abnormal amidst us. They do not belong to us. This "normalcy" is a disease. This +"normal" mind has created the appeal of yoga. If you take sex naturally — with no +philosophy around it, with no philosophy for or against — if you take sex as you take your +hands, your eyes; if it is totally accepted as a natural thing, then tantra will have an +appeal. And only then can tantra be useful for many. + +But the days of tantra are coming. Sooner or later tantra will explode for the first time in +the masses, because for the first time the time is ripe — ripe to take sex naturally. + +It is possible that the explosion may come from the West, because Freud, Jung, Reich, +they have prepared the background. They did not know anything about tantra, but they +have made the basic ground for tantra to evolve. Western psychology has come to a +conclusion that the basic human disease is somewhere around sex, the basic insanity of +man is sex-oriented. + +So unless this sex orientation is dissolved, man cannot be natural, nonnal. Man has gone +wrong only because of his attitudes about sex. No attitude is needed. Only then are you +natural. What attitude have you about your eyes? Are they evil or are they divine? Are +you for your eyes or against them? There is no attitude! That is why your eyes are +normal. + +Take some attitude — think that eyes are evil. Then seeing will become difficult. Then +seeing will take the same problematic shape that sex has taken. Then you will want to +see, you will desire and you will hanker to see. But when you see you will feel guilty. +Whenever you see you will feel guilty that you have done something wrong, that you + + + +have sinned. You would like to kill your very instrument of seeing; you would like to +destroy your eyes. And the more you want to destroy them, the more you will become +eye centered. Then you will start a very absurd activity. You will want to see more and +more, and simultaneously you will feel more and more guilty. The same has happened +with the sex center. + + +Tantra says, accept whatsoever you are. This is the basic note — total acceptance. And +only through total acceptance can you grow. Then use every energy you have. How can +you use them? Accept them, then find out what these energies are — what is sex, what is +this phenomenon. We are not acquainted with it. We know many things about sex, taught +by others. We may have passed through the sex act, but with a guilty mind, with a +suppressive attitude, in haste, in a hurry. Something has to be done in order to become +unburdened. The sex act is not a loving act. You are not happy in it, but you cannot leave +it. The more you try to leave it, the more attractive it becomes. The more you want to +negate it, the more you feel invited. + +You cannot negate it, but this attitude to negate, to destroy, destroys the very mind, the +very awareness, the very sensitivity which can understand it. So sex goes on with no +sensitivity into it. Then you cannot understand it. Only a deep sensitivity can understand +anything; only a deep feeling, a deep moving into it, can understand anything. You can +understand sex only if you move in it as a poet moves amidst flowers — only then! If you +feel guilty about flowers, you may pass through the garden, but you will pass with closed +eyes. And you will be in a hurry, in a deep, mad haste. Somehow you have to go out of +the garden. Then how can you be aware? + +So tantra says, accept whatsoever you are. + +You are a great mystery of many multidimensional energies. Accept it, and move with +every energy with deep sensitivity, with awareness, with love, with understanding. Move +with it! Then every desire becomes a vehicle to go beyond it. Then every energy becomes +a help. And then this very world is nirvana, this very body is a temple — a holy temple, a +holy place. + +Yoga is negation; tantra is affirmation. Yoga thinks in terms of duality — that is the +reason for the word yoga'. It means to put two things together, to 'yoke' two things +together. But two things are there; the duality is there. Tantra says there is no duality. If +there is duality, then you cannot put them together. And howsoever you try they will +remain two. Howsoever put together they will remain two, and the fight will continue, the +dualism will remain. + +If the world and the divine are two, then they cannot be put together. If really they are not +two, if they are only appearing as two, only then can they be one. If your body and your +soul are two, then they cannot be put together. If you and God are two, then there is no +possibility of putting them together. They will remain two. + +Tantra says there is no duality; it is only an appearance. So why help appearance to grow +stronger? Tantra asks, why help this appearance of duality to grow stronger? Dissolve it +this very moment! Be one! Through acceptance you become one, not through fight. + +Accept the world, accept the body, accept everything that is inherent in it. Do not create a +different center in yourself, because for tantra that different center is nothing but the ego. +Do not create an ego. Just be aware of what you are. If you fight, then the ego will be + + + +there. + +So it is difficult to find a yogi who is not an egoist. And yogis may go on talking about +egolessness, but they cannot be egoless. The very process they go through creates the +ego. The fight is the process. If you fight, you are bound to create an ego. And the more +you fight, the more strengthened the ego will be. And if you win your fight, then you will +achieve the supreme ego. + +Tantra says, no fight! Then there is no possibility of the ego. If we understand tantra there +will be many problems, because for us, if there is no fight there is only indulgence. No +fight means indulgence for us. Then we become afraid. We have indulged for lives +together and we have reached nowhere. But for tantra indulgence is not "our" indulgence. +Tantra says indulge, but be aware. + +You are angry... tantra will not say do not be angry. Tantra will say be angry +wholeheartedly, but be aware. Tantra is not against anger, tantra is only against spiritual +sleepiness, spiritual unconsciousness. Be aware AND be angry. And this is the secret of +the method — that if you are aware anger is transformed: it becomes compassion. + +So tantra says anger is not your enemy; it is compassion in seed form. The same anger, +the same energy, will become compassion. + +If you fight with it, then there will be no possibility for compassion. So if you succeed in +fighting, in suppression, you will be a dead man. There will be no anger because you +have suppressed it, but there will be no compassion either because only anger can be +transfonned into compassion. If you succeed in your suppression — which is impossible +— then there will be no sex, but no love either, because with sex dead there is no energy +to grow into love. So you will be without sex, but you will also be without love. And then +the whole point is missed, because without love there is no divineness, without love there +is no liberation, and without love there is no freedom. + +Tantra says that these same energies are to be transformed. It can be said in this way: if +you are against the world, then there is no nirvana — because this world itself is to be +transfonned into nirvana. Then you are against the basic energies which are the source. + +So tantric alchemy says, do not fight, be friendly with all the energies that are given to +you. Welcome them. Feel grateful that you have anger, that you have sex, that you have +greed. Feel grateful because these are the hidden sources, and they can be transfonned, +they can be opened. And when sex is transformed it becomes love. + +The poison is lost, the ugliness is lost. + +The seed is ugly, but when it becomes alive it sprouts and flowers. Then there is beauty. +Do not throw away the seed, because then you are also throwing the flowers in it. They +are not there yet, not yet manifest so that you can see them. They are unmanifest, but they +are there. Use this seed so that you can attain to flowers. So first let there be acceptance, +a sensitive understanding and awareness. Then indulgence is allowed. + +One thing more which is really very strange, but one of the deepest discoveries of tantra, +and that is: whatsoever you take as your enemies — greed, anger, hate, sex, whatsoever — +your attitude that they are enemies makes them your enemies. Take them as divine gifts +and approach them with a very grateful heart. For example, tantra has developed many +techniques for the transformation of sexual energy. Approach the sex act as if you are +approaching the temple of the divine. Approach the sex act as if it is prayer, as if it is +meditation. Feel the holiness of it. + +That is why in Khajuraho, in Puri, in Konark, every temple has MAITHUN, intercourse + + + +sculptures. The sex act on the walls of temples seems illogical, particularly for +Christianity, for Islam, for Jainism. It seems inconceivable, contradictory. How is the +temple connected with maithun pictures? On the outer walls of the Khajuraho temples, +every conceivable type of sex act is pictured in stone. + +Why? In a temple it doesn’t have any place, in our minds at least. Christianity cannot +conceive of a church wall with Khajuraho pictures. Impossible! + +Modern Hindus also feel guilty because the minds of modern Hindus are created by +Christianity. They are "Hindu-Christians" — and they are worse, because to be a Christian +is good, but to be a Hindu-Christian is just weird. They feel guilty. One Hindu leader, +Purshottamdas Tandon, even proposed that these temples should be destroyed, that they +do not belong to us. Really, it looks like they do not belong to us because tantra has not +been in our hearts for a long time, for centuries. It has not been the main current. Yoga +has been the main current, and for yoga Khajuraho is inconceivable — it must be +destroyed. + +Tantra says, approach the sex act as if you are entering a holy temple. That is why they +have pictured the sex act on their holy temples. They have said, approach sex as if you +are entering a holy temple. Thus, when you enter a holy temple sex must be there in order +that the two become conjoined in your mind, associated. Then you can feel that the world +and the divine are not two fighting elements, but one. They are not contradictory, they are +just polar opposites helping each other. And they can exist only because of this polarity. + +If this polarity is lost, the whole world is lost. So see the deep oneness running through +everything. + +Do not see only the polar opposites, see the inner running current which makes them one. +For tantra everything is holy. Remember this, for tantra EVERYTHING is holy; nothing +is unholy. Look at it this way: for an irreligious person, everything is unholy; for so- +called religious persons something is holy, something is unholy. + +For tantra, everything is holy. + +One Christian missionary was with me a few days ago and he said, "God created the +world." So I asked him, "Who created sin?" He said, "The devil." + +Then I asked him, "Who created the devil?" Then he was at a loss. He said, "Of course, +God created the devil." + +The devil creates sin and God creates the devil. Then who is the real sinner — the devil or +God? But the dualist conception always leads to such absurdities. For tantra God and the +devil are not two. Really, for tantra there is nothing that can be called "devil", everything +is divine, everything is holy. And this seems to be the right standpoint, the deepest. If +anything is unholy in this world, from where does it come and how can it be? + +So only two alternatives are there. First, the alternative of the atheist who says everything +is unholy. This attitude is okay. He is also a non-dualist; he sees no holiness in the world. +Then there is the tantric's alternative — he says everything is holy. He is also a non- +dualist. But between these two are the so-called religious persons, who are not really +religious. + +They are neither religious nor irreligious because they are always in a conflict. Their +whole theology is just to make ends meet, and those ends cannot meet. + +If a single cell, a single atom in this world is unholy, then the whole world becomes +unholy, because how can that single atom exist in a holy world? How can it be? It is + + + +supported by everything; to be, it has to be supported by everything. And if the unholy +element is supported by all the holy elements, then what is the difference between them? +So either the world is holy totally, unconditionally, or it is unholy; there is no middle +path. + +Tantra says everything is holy, that is why we cannot understand it. It is the deepest non- +dual standpoint — if we can call it a standpoint. It is not, because any standpoint is bound +to be dual. It is not against anything, so it is not any standpoint. It is a felt unity, a lived +unity. + +These are two paths, yoga and tantra. Tantra could not be so appealing because of our +crippled minds. But whenever there is someone who is healthy inside, not a chaos, tantra +has a beauty. Only he can understand what tantra is. Yoga has appeal, an easy appeal, +because of our disturbed minds. + +Remember, it is ultimately your mind which makes anything attractive or unattractive. It +is you who is the deciding factor. + +These approaches are different. I am not saying that one cannot reach through yoga. + +One can reach through yoga also, but not through the yoga which is prevalent. The yoga +which is prevalent is not really yoga, but the interpretation of your diseased minds. Yoga +can be authentically an approach toward the ultimate, but that too is only possible when +your mind is healthy, when your mind is not diseased and ill. Then yoga takes a different +shape. + +For example, Mahavir was on the path of yoga, but he was not really suppressing sex. He +had known it, he had lived it, he was deeply acquainted with it. But it became useless to +him, so it dropped. Buddha was on the path of yoga, but he had lived through the world, +he was deeply acquainted with it. He was not fighting. + +Once you kn ow something you become free from it. It simply drops like dead leaves +dropping from a tree. It is not renunciation; there is no fight involved at all. Look at +Buddha's face — it doesn't look like the face of a fighter. He has not been fighting. He is +so relaxed; his face is the very symbol of relaxation... no fight. + +Look at your yogis. The fight is apparent on their faces. Deep down much turmoil is there +— right now they are sitting on volcanos. You can look in their eyes, in their faces, and +you will feel it. Deep down somewhere they have suppressed all their diseases; they have +not gone beyond. + +In a healthy world, where everyone is living his life authentically, individually, not +imitating others but living his own life in his own way, both are possible. + +He may learn the deep sensitivity which transcends desires; he may come to a point +where all desires become futile and drop. Yoga can also lead to this, but to me yoga will +lead to it in the same world where tantra can lead to it — remember this. We need a +healthy mind, a natural man. In that world where a natural man is, tantra, and yoga also, +will lead to transcendence of desires. + +In our so-called ill society, neither yoga nor tantra can do this, because if we choose yoga +we do not choose it because desires have become useless — no! They are still meaningful; +they are not dropping by themselves. We have to force them. If we choose yoga, we +choose it as a technique of suppression. If we choose tantra, we choose tantra as a +cunningness, as a deep deception — an excuse to indulge. + +So with an unhealthy mind neither yoga nor tantra can work. They will both lead to +deceptions. A healthy mind, particularly a sexually healthy mind, is needed to start with. + + + +Then it is not very difficult to choose your path. You can choose yoga, you can choose +tantra. + +There are two types of persons basically, male and female. I do not mean biologically, +but psychologically. For those who are psychologically basically male — aggressive, +violent, extrovert — yoga is their path. For those who are basically feminine, receptive, +passive, non-violent, tantra is their path. So you may note it: for tantra, Mother Kali, + +Tara, and so many DEVIS, BHAIRAVIS — female deities — are very significant. + +In yoga you will never hear mentioned any name of a feminine deity. Tantra has feminine +deities; yoga has male gods. Yoga is outgoing energy; tantra is energy moving inwards. + +So you can say in modern psychological terms that yoga is extrovert and tantra is +introvert. So it depends on the personality. If you have an introverted personality, then +fight is not for you. If you have an extroverted personality, then fight is for you. + +But we are just confused, we are just in a mess; that is why nothing helps. On the +contrary, everything disturbs. Yoga will disturb you, tantra will disturb you. Every +medicine is going to create a new illness for you because the chooser is ill, diseased; so +the result of his choice will be illness. So I do not mean that through yoga you cannot +reach. I emphasize tantra only because we are going to try to understand what tantra is. +Another question: + +Question 2 + +ON THE PATH OF SURRENDER, HOW DOES THE SEEKER COME TO THE +RIGHT TECHNIQUE OUT OF ONE HUNDRED AND TWELVE METHODS? + +On the path of will there are methods — these one hundred and twelve methods. On the +path of surrender, surrender itself is the method, there are no other methods — remember +this. All methods are non-surrendering, because a method means depending on yourself. +You can do something; the technique is there, so you do it. On the path of surrender, you +are no more, so you cannot do anything. + +You have done the ultimate, the last: you have surrendered. On the path of surrender, +surrender is the only method. + +All these one hundred and twelve methods require a certain will; they require something +to be done by you. You manipulate your energy, you balance your energy, you create a +center in your chaos. You do something. Your effort is significant, basic, required. On the +path of surrender only one thing is required — you surrender. We will go deep into these +one hundred and twelve methods, so it is good to say something about surrender because +it has no method. + +In these one hundred and twelve methods there will be nothing about surrender. Why has +Shiva not said anything about surrender? Because nothing can be said. Bhairavi herself, +Devi herself, has reached Shiva not through any method. She has simply surrendered. So +this must be noted. She is asking these questions not for herself, these questions are asked +for the whole humanity. She has attained Shiva. She is already in his lap; she is already +embraced by him. She has become one with him, but still she is asking. + +So remember one thing, she is not asking for herself; there is no need. She is asking for +the whole humanity. But if she has attained, why is she asking Shiva? Can she herself not +speak to the humanity? She has come through the path of surrender, so she doesn't know +anything about method. + + +She herself has come through love; love is enough unto itself. Love doesn’t need anything + + + +more. She has come through love, so she doesn’t know anything about any methods, +techniques. That is why she is asking. + +So Shiva relates one hundred and twelve methods. He also will not talk about surrender +because surrender is not a method really. You surrender only when every method has +become futile, when you cannot reach by any method. You have tried your best. You +have knocked on every door and no door opens, and you have passed through all the +routes and no route reaches. You have done whatsoever you can do, and now you feel +helpless. In that total helplessness surrender happens. So on the path of surrender there is +no method. + +But what is surrender and how does it work? And if surrender works, then what is the +need of one hundred and twelve methods? Then why go into them unnecessarily? — the +mind will ask. Then okay! If surrender works, it is better to surrender. Why go on +hankering after methods? And who knows whether a particular method will suit you or +not? And it may take lives to find out. So it is good to surrender, but it is difficult. It is +the most difficult thing in the world. + +Methods are not difficult. They are easy; you can train yourself. But for surrender you +cannot train yourself... no training! You cannot ask how to surrender; the very question is +absurd. + +How can you ask how to surrender? Can you ask how to love? + +Either there is love or there is not, but you cannot ask how to love. And if someone tells +you and teaches you how to love, remember, then you will never be capable of love. + +Once a technique is given to you for love, you will cling to the technique. That is why +actors cannot love. They know so many techniques, so many methods — and we are all +actors. Once you know the trick how to love, then love will not flower because you can +create a facade, a deception. And with the deception you are out of it, not involved. You +are protected. + +Love is being totally open, vulnerable. It is dangerous. You become insecure. We cannot +ask how to love, we cannot ask how to surrender. It happens! Love happens, surrender +happens. Love and surrender are deeply one. But what is it? And if we cannot know how +to surrender, at least we can know how we are maintaining ourselves from surrendering, +how we are preventing ourselves from surrendering. That can be known and that is +helpful. + +How is it that you have not surrendered yet? What is your technique of non-surrendering? +If you have not fallen in love yet, then the real problem is not how to love. The real +problem is to dig deep to find out how you have lived without love, what is your trick, +what is your technique, what is your structure — your defense structure, how you have +lived without love. + +That can be understood, and that should be understood. + +Lirst thing: we live with the ego, in the ego, centered in the ego. I am without knowing +who I am. I go on announcing, "I am." This "I-am-ness" is false, because I do not know +who I am. And unless I know who I am, how can I say "I"? This "I" is a false "I". This +false "I" is the ego. This is the defense. This protects you from surrendering. + +You cannot surrender, but you can become aware of this defense measure. If you have +become aware of it, it dissolves. By and by, you are not strengthening it, and one day you +come to feel, "I am not." The moment you come to feel "I am not," surrender happens. So +try to find out whether you are. Really, is there any center in you that you can call your + + + +"I"?. Go deep down within yourself, go on trying to find out where is this "I", where is +the abode of this ego. + +Rinzai went to his master and he said, "Give me freedom!" The master said, "Bring +yourself. If you are, I will make you free. But if you are not, then how can I make you +free? You are already free. And freedom," his master said, "is not your freedom. Really, +freedom is freedom from 'you'. So go and find out where this 'I' is, where you are, then +come to me. This is the meditation. Go and meditate." + +So the disciple Rinzai goes and meditates for weeks, months, and then he comes. Then he +says, "I am not the body. + +Only this much I have found." So the master says, "This much you have become free. Go +again. Try to find out." Then he tries, meditates, and he finds that "I am not my mind, +because I can observe my thoughts. So the observer is different from the observed — I am +not my mind." He comes and says, "I am not my mind." So his master says, "Now you +are three-fourths liberated. Now go again and find out who you are." + +So he was thinking, "I am not my body. I am not my mind." He had read, studied, he was +well informed, so he was thinking, "I am not my body, not my mind, so I must be my +soul, my ATMA." But he meditated, and then he found that there is no atman, no soul, +because this atma is nothing but your mental information — just doctrines, words, +philosophies. + +So he came running one day and he said, "Now I am no more!" Then his master said, + +"Am I now to teach you the methods for freedom?" Rinzai said, "I am free because I am +no more. There is no one to be in bondage. I am just a wide emptiness, a nothingness." +Only nothingness can be free. If you are something, you will be in bondage. If you are, +you will be in bondage. Only a void, a vacant space, can be free. Then you cannot bind it. +Rin z ai came running and said, "I am no more. Nowhere am I to be found." This is +freedom. And for the first time he touched his master's feet — for the first time! Not +actually, because he had touched them many times before also. + +But the master said, "For the first time you have touched my feet." + +Rinzai asked, "Why do you say for the first time? I have touched your feet many times." +The master said, "But you were there, so how could you touch my feet while you were +already there? While you are there how can you touch my feet?" The "I" can never touch +anybody's feet. Even though it apparently looks like it touches somebody's feet, it is +touching its own feet, just in a round-about way. "You have touched my feet for the first +time," the master said, "because now you are no more. And this is also the last time," the +master said. "The first and the last." + +Surrender happens when you are not, so YOU cannot surrender. That is why surrender +cannot be a technique. You cannot surrender — you are the hindrance. When you are not, +surrender is there. So you and surrender cannot cohabit, there is no coexistence between +you and surrender. Either you are or surrender is. So find out where you are, who you +are. This inquiry creates many, many surprising results. + +Raman Maharshi used to say, "Inquire 'Who am I ?’" It was misunderstood. Even his +nearest disciples have not understood the meaning of it. They think that this is an inquiry +to find out really "Who am I?" It is not! if you go on inquiring "Who am I?" you are +bound to come to the conclusion that you are not. This is not really an inquiry to find out +"Who am I?" Really, this is an inquiry to dissolve. + + + +I have given many this technique, to inquire within "Who am I?" Then a month or two +months later, they will come to me and say, "I have still not found 'Who am I?’ The +question is still the same; there is no answer." + +So I tell them, "Continue. Someday the answer will come." And they hope that the +answer will come. There is going to be no answer. It is only that the question will +dissolve. There is not going to be an answer, that "You are this." Only the question will +dissolve. There will be no one to ask even "Who am I?" And then you know. + +When the "I" is not, the real "I" opens. When the ego is not, you are for the first time +encountering your being. That being is void. Then you can surrender; then you have +surrendered. You are surrender now. So there can be no techniques, or only negative +techniques like this inquiry into "Who am I?" + +How does surrender work? If you surrender, what happens? We will come to understand +how methods work. We will go deep into methods, and we will come to know how they +work. They have a scientific basis of working. + +When you surrender you become a valley; when you are an ego you are like a peak. Ego +means you are above everyone else, you are somebody. The others may recognize you, +may not recognize you — that is another thing. You recognize that you are above +everyone. You are like a peak; nothing can enter you. + + +When one surrenders, one becomes like a valley. One becomes depth, not height. Then +the whole existence begins to pour into him from everywhere. He is just a vacuum, just a +depth, an abyss, bottomless. The whole existence begins to pour from everywhere. You +can say God runs from everywhere to him, enters him from every pore, fills him totally. +This surrender, this becoming a valley, an abyss, can be felt in many ways. There are +minor surrenders; there are major surrenders. Even in minor surrenders you feel it. +Surrendering to a master is a minor surrender, but you begin to feel it because the master +begins to flow into you immediately. If you surrender to a master, suddenly you feel his +energy flowing into you. If you cannot feel energy flowing into you, then know well you +have not surrendered even in a minor way. + +There are so many stories which have become meaningless for us because we do not +know how they happened. Mahakashyap came to Buddha, and Buddha just touched his +head with his hand, and the thing happened. And Mahakashyap began to dance. So +Ananda asked Buddha, "What has happened to him? And I have been for forty years with +you! Is he mad? Or is he just fooling others? What has happened to him? And I have +touched your feet thousands and thousands of times." + +Of course, to Ananda, this Mahakashyap will either look like he is mad or as if he is just +deceiving. + +He was with Buddha for forty years, but there was a problem. He was his elder brother, +Buddha’s elder brother; that was the problem. When Ananda came to Buddha forty years +before, the first thing he said to Buddha was this: "I am your elder brother, and when you +will initiate me, I will become your disciple. So allow me three things before I become +your disciple, because then I cannot demand. One, I will always be with you. Give me +this promise, that you will not say to me, 'Go somewhere else.’ I will follow you. +"Secondly, I will sleep in the same room where you sleep. You cannot say to me, 'Go +out.’ I will be with you like your shadow. And thirdly, if I bring anyone at any time, even + + + +at midnight, you will have to answer him. You cannot say, 'This is not the time.’ And +give me these three promises while I am still your elder brother, because once I become +your disciple I will have to follow you. You are still younger than me, so give me these +promises." + +So Buddha promised, and this became the problem. For forty years Ananda was with +Buddha, but he could never surrender, because this is not the spirit of surrender. Ananda +asked many, many times, "When am I going to attain?" Buddha said, "Unless I die, you +will not attain." And Ananda could attain only when Buddha died. + +What happened to this Mahakashyap suddenly? Is Buddha partial — partial to +Mahakashyap? He is not! He is flowing, constantly flowing. + +But you have to be a valley, a womb, to receive him. If you are above him, how can you +receive? That flowing energy cannot come to you, it will miss you. So bow down. Even +in a minor surrender with a master, energy begins to flow. Suddenly, immediately, you +become a vehicle of a great force. + +There are thousands and thousands of stories... just by a touch, just by a look, someone +became enlightened. They do not appear rational to us. How is this possible? This is +possible! Even a look from the master into your eyes will change your total being, but it +can change only if your eyes are just vacant, valley-like. If you can absorb the look of the +master, immediately you will be different. + +So these are minor surrenders that happen before you surrender totally. And these minor +surrenders prepare you for the total surrender. Once you have known that through +surrender you receive something unknown, unbelievable, unexpected, never even +dreamed of, then you are ready for a major surrender. And that is the work of the master +— to help you in minor surrenders so that you can gather courage for a major surrender, +for a total surrender. + +One last question: + +Question 3 + +WHAT ARE THE EXACT INDICATIONS TO KNOW THAT THE PARTICULAR +TECHNIQUE ONE IS PRACTISING WILL LEAD TO THE ULTIMATE? + +There are indications. One, you begin to feel a different identity within you. + +You are no more the same. If the technique fits you, immediately you are a different +person. If you are a husband, you are no more the same husband. If you are a shopkeeper, +you are never again the same shopkeeper. Whatsoever you are, if the technique fits you, +you are a different person; that is the first indication. So if you begin to feel strange about +yourself, know that something is happening to you. If you remain the same and do not +feel any strangeness, nothing is happening. This is the first indication of whether a +technique fits you. If it fits, immediately you are transported, transformed into a different +person. Suddenly this happens: you look at the world in a different way. The eyes are the +same, but the looker behind them is different. + +Secondly, all that creates tensions, conflicts, starts dropping. It is not that when you have +practiced the method for years, then your conflicts, anxieties, tensions will drop — no! If +the method fits you, immediately they start dropping. You can feel an aliveness coming +to you; you are being unburdened. You will begin to feel, if the technique fits you, that +gravity has become reversed. Now the earth is not pulling you down. Rather, the sky is +pulling you up. How do you feel when an airplane takes off? Everything is disturbed. +Suddenly there is a jerk, and gravity becomes meaningless. Now the earth is not pulling + + + +you, you are going away from gravity. + + +The same jerk happens if a meditative technique fits you. Suddenly you take off. + +Suddenly you feel the earth has become meaningless; there is no gravity. It is not pulling +you down, you are being pulled up. In religious terminology, this is called "grace". There +are two forces — gravity and grace. Grace means you are being pulled upwards; gravity +means you are being pulled downwards. + +That is why in meditation many people suddenly feel they have no weight. That is why +many people feel an inner levitation. So many have reported this to me when the +technique fits them: "This is strange! We close our eyes and we feel that we are a little bit +above the earth — one foot, two feet, even four feet above the earth. When we open our +eyes we are just on the ground; when we close our eyes we have levitated. So what is +this? When we open our eyes we are just on the ground! We never levitated." + +The body remains on the ground, but you levitate. This levitation is really a pull from the +above. If the technique fits you have been pulled, because the working of the technique is +to make available for you the upward pull. This is what the technique means: to make +you available for the force which can pull you up. So if it fits, you know — you have +become weightless. + +Thirdly, whatsoever you will now do, whatsoever, howsoever trivial, will be different. +You will walk in a different way, you will sit in a different way, you will eat in a +different way. + +Everything will be different. This difference you will feel everywhere. Sometimes this +strange experience of being different creates fear. One wants again to go back and be the +same, because one was so attuned with the old. It was a routine world, even boring, but +you were efficient in it. + +Now everywhere you will feel a gap. You will feel that your efficiency is lost. You will +feel that your utility is reduced. You will feel that everywhere you are an outsider. One +has to pass through this period. You will become attuned again. You have changed, not +the world, so you will not fit. So remember the third thing: When the technique fits you, +you will not fit into the world. You will become unfit. Everywhere something is loose, +some bolt is missing. Everywhere you will feel that there has been an earthquake. And +everything has remained the same; only you, you, have become different. But you will be +attuned again on a different plane, on a higher plane. + +The disturbance is felt just like when a child grows and becomes sexually mature. At the +age of fourteen or fifteen every boy feels that he has become strange. A new force has +entered — sex. It was not there before, or it was, but it was hidden. Now for the first time +he has become available for a new kind of force. That is why boys are very awkward; +girls, boys, when they become sexually mature, they are very awkward. + +They are nowhere. They are no longer children and they are not yet men, so they are in +between, fitting nowhere. If they play with small children they feel awkward — they have +become men. If they start making friendships with men they feel awkward — they are still +children. They fit with no one. + +The same phenomenon happens when a technique fits you. A new energy source +becomes available that is greater than sex. You are again in a transitory period. Now you +cannot fit in this world of worldly men. You are not a child, and you cannot yet fit in the + + + +world of saints; and in between one feels awkward. + +If a technique fits you these three things will come up. You may not have expected that I +would say these things. You may have expected that I would say you will become more +silent, more quiet, and I am saying quite the contrary: you will become more disturbed. +When the technique fits you will become more disturbed, not more silent. Silence will +come later on. And if silence comes and not disturbance, know well that this is not a +technique; this is just getting adjusted to the old pattern. + +That is why more people go for a prayer than for meditation because prayer gives you a +consolation. It fits you, adjusts to you, to your world. Prayer was doing virtually the same +thing that psychoanalysts are now doing. If you are disturbed they will make you less +disturbed, adjusted to the pattern, to the society, to the family. + +So by going to a psychoanalyst for one, two or three years you will not get better, but you +will be more adjusted. Prayer does the same thing, and priests do the same thing — they +make you more adjusted. + +Your child has died and you are disturbed, and you go to a priest. He says, "Do not be +disturbed. Only those children die early whom God loves more. He calls them up." You +feel satisfied. Your child has been "called up." God loves him more. Or the priest says +something else: "Do not be worried, the soul never dies. Your child is in heaven." + +One woman was here just a few days before. Her husband had died just during the past +month. She was disturbed. She came to me and she said, "Only assure me that he is +reborn in a good place and then everything will be okay. Just give me a certainty that he +has not gone to hell or he has not become an animal, that he is in heaven or he has +become a god or some such thing. If you can just assure me of this, then everything is +okay. Then I can bear it; otherwise I am miserable." + +The priest would say, "Okay! Your husband is bom as a god in the seventh heaven, and +he is very happy. And he is waiting for you." + +These prayers, they make you adjusted to the pattern... you feel better. Meditation is a +science. It is not going to help you in adjustment, it is going to help you in +transfonnation. That is why I say these three signs will be there as indications. + +Silence will come, but not as an adjustment. Silence will come as an inner flowering. +Then silence will not be an adjustment with the society, with the family, the world, the +business — no! Then silence will be a real harmony with the universe. + +Then a deep harmony flowers between you and the totality, then there is silence — but +that will come later. First you will get disturbed, first you will become mad. + +If a technique fits, it will make you aware of everything that you are. Your anarchy, your +mind, your madness, everything will come to light. You are just a dark mess. When a +technique fits, it is as if suddenly there is light and the whole mess becomes apparent. For +the first time you will encounter yourself as you are. You would like to put the light off +and go to sleep again — it is fearful. This is the point where the master becomes helpful. +He says, "Do not be afraid. This is just the beginning. And do not escape from it." + +At first this light shows you what you are, and if you can go on and on, it transfonns you +toward what you can be. + +Enough for today. + + +THE END. + + + +Chapter 3: Breath-- a bridge to the universe + + +SUTRAS: + +SHIVA REPLIES: + +1. RADIANT ONE, THIS EXPERIENCE MAY DAWN BETWEEN TWO BREATHS. +AFTER BREATH COMES IN (DOWN) AND JUST BEFORE TURNING UP (OUT) - +THE BENEFICENCE. + +2. AS BREATH TURNS FROM DOWN TO UP, AND AGAIN AS BREATH CURVES +FROM UP TO DOWN - THROUGH BOTH THESE TURNS, REALIZE. + +3. OR, WHENEVER IN-BREATH AND OUT-BREATH FUSE, AT THIS INSTANT +TOUCH THE ENERGY-LESS, ENERGY-FILLED CENTER. + +4. OR, WHEN BREATH IS ALL OUT (UP) AND STOPPED OF ITSELF, OR ALL IN +(DOWN) AND STOPPED - IN SUCH UNIVERSAL PAUSE, ONE’S SMALL SELF +VANISHES. THIS IS DIFFICULT ONLY FOR THE IMPURE. + +Truth is always here. It is already the case. It is not something to be achieved in the +future. YOU are the truth just here and now, so it is not something which is to be created +or something which is to be devised or something which is to be sought. Understand this +very clearly; then these techniques will be easy to understand and also to do. + +Mind is a mechanism of desiring. Mind is always in desire, always seeking something, +asking for something. Always the object is in the future; mind is not concerned with the +present at all. In this very moment the mind cannot move — there is no space. The mind +needs the future in order to move. It can move either in the past or in the future. It cannot +move in the present; there is no space. The truth is in the present, and mind is always in +the future or in the past, so there is no meeting between mind and truth. + + +When the mind is seeking worldly objects it is not so difficult, the problem is not absurd; +it can be solved. But when the mind starts seeking the truth the very effort becomes +nonsense, because the truth is here and now and the mind is always then and there. There +is no meeting. So understand the first thing: you cannot seek truth. You can find it, but +you cannot seek it. The very seeking is the hindrance. + +The moment you start seeking you have moved away from the present, away from +yourself, because YOU are always in the present. The seeker is always in the present and +the seeking is in the future, you are not going to meet whatsoever you are seeking. Lao +Tzu says, "Seek not; otherwise you will miss. Seek not and find. Don’t seek and find." + +All these techniques of Shiva's are simply turning the mind from the future or the past to +the present. That which you are seeking is already there, it is the case already. The mind +has to be turned from seeking to non-seeking. It is difficult. If you think about it +intellectually it is very difficult. How to turn the mind from seeking to non-seeking? — +because then the mind makes non-seeking itself the object! Then the mind says, "Don’t +seek." Then the mind says, "I should not seek." Then the mind says, "Now non-seeking is +my object. Now I desire the state of desirelessness." The seeking has entered again, the +desire has come again through the back door. + +That is why there are people who are seeking worldly objects, and there are people who +think they are seeking non-worldly objects. All objects are worldly because "seeking" is + + + +the world. + +So you cannot seek anything non-worldly. The moment you seek, it becomes the world. +If you are seeking God, your God is part of the world. If you are seeking MOKSHA — +liberation — NIRVANA, your liberation is part of the world, your liberation is not +something that transcends the world, because seeking is the world, desiring is the world. +So you cannot desire nirvana, you cannot desire non-desire. If you try to understand +intellectually, it will become a puzzle. + +Shiva says nothing about it, he immediately proceeds to give techniques. They are non- +intellectual. He doesn’t say to Devi, "The truth is here. Don't seek it and you will find it." +He immediately gives techniques. Those techniques are non-intellectual. Do them, and +the mind turns. The turning is just a consequence, just a by-product — not an object. The +turning is just a by-product. + +If you do a technique, your mind will turn from its journey into the future or the past. +Suddenly you will find yourself in the present. That is why Buddha has given techniques, +Lao Tzu has given techniques, Krishna has given techniques. But they always introduce +their techniques with intellectual concepts. Only Shiva is different. + +He immediately gives techniques, and no intellectual understanding, no intellectual +introduction, because he knows that the mind is tricky, the most cunning thing possible. + +It can turn anything into a problem. Non-seeking will become the problem. + +There are people who come to me who ask how not to desire. They are desiring non- +desire. Somebody has told them, or they have read somewhere, or they have heard +spiritual gossip, that if you do not desire you will reach bliss, if you do not desire you +will be free, if you do not desire there will be no suffering. Now their minds hanker to +attain that state where there is no suffering, so they ask how not to desire. Their minds +are playing tricks. They are still desiring, it is only that now the object has changed. They +were desiring money, they were desiring fame, they were desiring prestige, they were +desiring power. Now they are desiring non-desire. Only the object has changed, and they +remain the same and their desiring remains the same. But now the desire has become +more deceptive. + +Because of this, Shiva proceeds immediately with no introduction whatsoever. He +immediately starts talking about techniques. Those techniques, if followed, suddenly turn +your mind: it comes to the present. And when the mind comes to the present it stops, it is +no more. You cannot be a mind in the present, that is impossible. Just now, if you are +here and now, how can you be a mind? Thoughts cease because they cannot move. + +The present has no space in which to move; you cannot think. If you are in this very +moment, how can you move? Mind stops, you attain to no-mind. + +So the real thing is how to be here and now. You can try, but effort may prove futile — +because if you make it a point to be in the present, then this point has moved into the +future. When you ask how to be in the present, again you are asking about the future. + +This moment is passing in the inquiry, "How to be present? How to be here and now?" +This present moment is passing in the inquiry, and your mind will begin to weave and +create dreams in the future: some day you will be in a state of mind where there is no +movement, no motive, no seeking, and then there will be bliss — so how to be in the +present? + +Shiva doesn’t say anything about it, he simply gives a technique. You do it, and suddenly +you find you are here and now. And your being here and now is the truth, and your being + + + +here and now is the freedom, and your being here and now is the nirvana. + +The first nine techniques are concerned with breathing. So let us understand something +about breathing, and then we will proceed to the techniques. We are breathing +continuously from the moment of birth to the moment of death. Everything changes +between these two points. Everything changes, nothing remains the same, only breathing +is a constant thing between birth and death. + + +The child will become a youth; the youth will become old. He will be diseased, his body +will become ugly, ill, everything will change. He will be happy, unhappy, in suffering; +everything will go on changing. But whatsoever happens between these two points, one +must breathe. Whether happy or unhappy, young or old, successful or unsuccessful — +whatsoever you are, it is irrelevant — one thing is certain: between these two points of +birth and death you must breathe. + +Breathing will be a continuous flow; no gap is possible. If even for a single moment you +forget to breathe, you will be no more. That is why YOU are not required to breathe, +because then it would be difficult. Someone might forget to breathe for a single moment, +and then nothing could be done. So, really, YOU are not breathing, because YOU are not +needed. You are fast asleep, and breathing goes on; you are unconscious, and breathing +goes on; you are in a deep coma, and breathing goes on. YOU are not required; breathing +is something which goes on in spite of you. + +It is one of the constant factors in your personality — that is the first thing. It is something +which is very essential and basic to life — that is the second thing. You cannot be alive +without breath. So breath and life have become synonymous. Breathing is the mechanism +of life, and life is deeply related with breathing. That is why in India we call it PRANA. + +We have given one word for both — PRANA means the vitality, the aliveness. Your life +is your breath. + +Thirdly, your breath is a bridge between you and your body. Constantly, breath is +bridging you to your body, connecting you, relating you to your body. Not only is the +breath a bridge to your body, it is also a bridge between you and the universe. The body +is just the universe which has come to you, which is nearer to you. + +Your body is part of the universe. Everything in the body is part of the universe — every +particle, every cell. It is the nearest approach to the universe. Breath is the bridge. If the +bridge is broken, you are no more in the body. If the bridge is broken, you are no more in +the universe. You move into some unknown dimension; then you cannot be found in +space and time. So, thirdly, breath is also the bridge between you, and space and time. +Breath, therefore, becomes very significant — the most significant thing. So the first nine +techniques are concerned with breath. If you can do something with the breath, you will +suddenly turn to the present. If you can do something with breath, you will attain to the +source of life. If you can do something with breath, you can transcend time and space. If +you can do something with breath, you will be in the world and also beyond it. + +Breath has two points. One is where it touches the body and the universe, and another is +where it touches you and that which transcends the universe. + +We know only one part of the breath. When it moves into the universe, into the body, we +know it. But it is always moving from the body to the "no-body," from the "no-body" to +the body. We do not know the other point. If you become aware of the other point, the + + + +other part of the bridge, the other pole of the bridge, suddenly you will be transformed, +transplanted into a different dimension. + +But remember, what Shiva is going to say is not yoga, it is tantra. Yoga also works on +breath, but the work of yoga and tantra is basically different. Yoga tries to systematize +breathing. If you systematize your breathing your health will improve. If you systematize +your breathing, if you know the secrets of breathing, your life will become longer; you +will be more healthy and you will live longer. You will be more strong, more filled with +energy, more vital, alive, young, fresh. + +But tantra is not concerned with that. Tantra is concerned not with any systematization of +breath, but with using breath just as a technique to turn inward. One has not to practice a +particular style of breathing, a particular system of breathing or a particular rhythm of +breathing — no! One has to take breathing as it is. One has just to become aware of +certain points in the breathing. + +There are certain points, but we are not aware of them. We have been breathing and we +will go on breathing — we are born breathing and we will die breathing — but we are not +aware of certain points. + +And this is strange. Man is searching, probing deep into space. Man is going to the moon; +man is trying to reach farther, from earth into space, and man has not yet learned the +nearest part of his life. There are certain points in breathing which you have never +observed, and those points are the doors — the nearest doors to you from where you can +enter into a different world, into a different being, into a different consciousness. But +they are very subtle. + +To observe a moon is not very difficult. Even to reach the moon is not very difficult; it is +a gross journey. You need mechanization, you need technology, you need accumulated +information, and then you can reach it. Breathing is the nearest thing to you, and the +nearer a thing is, the more difficult it is to perceive it. The nearer it is, the more difficult; +the more obvious it is, the more difficult. It is so near to you that again there is no space +between you and your breathing. Or, there is such a small space that you will need a very +minute observation, only then will you become aware of certain points. These points are +the basis of these techniques. + +So now I will take each technique. + +SHIVA REPLIES: + +RADIANT ONE, THIS EXPERIENCE MAY DAWN BETWEEN TWO BREATHS. +AFTER BREATH COMES IN (DOWN) AND JUST BEFORE TURNING UP (OUT) - +THE BENEFICENCE. + +That is the technique: + +RADIANT ONE, THIS EXPERIENCE MAY DAWN BETWEEN TWO BREATHS. + + +After breath comes in — that is, down — and just before turning out — that is, going up — +THE BENEFICENCE. Be aware between these two points, and the happening. When +your breath comes in, observe. For a single moment, or a thousandth part of a moment, +there is no breathing — before it turns up, before it turns outward. One breath comes in; +then there is a certain point and breathing stops. Then the breathing goes out. When the +breath goes out, then again for a single moment, or a part of a moment, breathing stops. +Then breathing comes in. + +Before the breath is turning in or turning out, there is a moment when you are not + + + +breathing. In that moment the happening is possible, because when you are not breathing +you are not in the world. Understand this: when you are not breathing you are dead; you +ARE still, but dead. But the moment is of such a short duration that you never observe it. +For tantra, each outgoing breath is a death and each new breath is a rebirth. Breath +coming in is rebirth; breath going out is death. The outgoing breath is synonymous with +death; the incoming breath is synonymous with life. So with each breath you are dying +and being reborn. The gap between the two is of a very short duration, but keen, sincere +observation and attention will make you feel the gap. If you can feel the gap, Shiva says, +THE BENEFICENCE. Then nothing else is needed. + +You are blessed, you have known; the thing has happened. + +You are not to train the breath. Leave it just as it is. Why such a simple technique? It +looks so simple. Such a simple technique to know the truth? To know the truth means to +know that which is neither born nor dies, to know that eternal element which is always. +You can know the breath going out, you can know the breath coming in, but you never +know the gap between the two. + +Try it. Suddenly you will get the point — and you can get it; it is already there. Nothing is +to be added to you or to your structure, it is already there. Everything is already there +except a certain awareness. So how to do this? First, become aware of the breath coming +in. Watch it. Forget everything, just watch breath coming in — the very passage. + +When the breath touches your nostrils, feel it there. Then let the breath move in. Move +with the breath fully consciously. When you are going down, down, down with the +breath, do not miss the breath. Do not go ahead and do not follow behind, just go with it. +Remember this: do not go ahead, do not follow it like a shadow; be simultaneous with it. +Breath and consciousness should become one. The breath goes in — you go in. Only then +will it be possible to get the point which is between two breaths. It will not be easy. Move +in with the breath, then move out with the breath: in-out, in-out. + + +Buddha tried particularly to use this method, so this method has become a Buddhist +method. In Buddhist terminology it is known as Anapanasati Yoga. And Buddha's +enlightenment was based on this technique — only this. + +All the religions of the world, all the seers of the world, have reached through some +technique or other, and all those techniques will be in these one hundred and twelve +techniques. This first one is a Buddhist technique. It has become known in the world as a +Buddhist technique because Buddha attained his enlightenment through this technique. +Buddha said, "Be aware of your breath as it is coming in, going out — coming in, going +out." He never mentions the gap because there is no need. Buddha thought and felt that if +you become concerned with the gap, the gap between two breaths, that concern may +disturb your awareness. So he simply said, "Be aware. When the breath is going in move +with it, and when the breath is going out move with it. Do simply this: going in, going +out, with the breath." He never says anything about the latter part of the technique. + +The reason is that Buddha was talking with very ordinary men, and even that might +create a desire to attain the interval. That desire to attain the interval will become a +barrier to awareness, because if you are desiring to get to the interval you will move +ahead. Breath will be coming in, and you will move ahead because you are interested in +the gap which is going to be in the future. + + + +Buddha never mentions it, so Buddha’s technique is just half. + +But the other half follows automatically. If you go on practicing breath consciousness, +breath awareness, suddenly, one day, without knowing, you will come to the interval. +Because as your awareness will become keen and deep and intense, as your awareness +will become bracketed — the whole world is bracketed out; only your breath coming in or +going out is your world, the whole arena for your consciousness — suddenly you are +bound to feel the gap in which there is no breath. + +When you are moving with breath minutely, when there is no breath, how can you remain +unaware? You will suddenly become aware that there is no breath, and the moment will +come when you will feel that the breath is neither going out nor coming in. The breath +has stopped completely. In that stopping, THE BENEFICENCE. + +This one technique is enough for millions. The whole of Asia tried and lived with this +technique for centuries. Tibet, China, Japan, Burma, Thailand, Ceylon — the whole of +Asia except India has tried this technique. Only one technique and thousands and +thousands have attained enlightenment through it. And this is only the first technique. + +But unfortunately, because the technique became associated with Buddha's name, Hindus +have been trying to avoid it. Because it became more and more known as a Buddhist +method, Hindus have completely forgotten it. + +And not only that, they have also tried to avoid it for another reason. Because this +technique is the first technique mentioned by Shiva, many Buddhists have claimed that +this book, VIGYANA BHAIRAVA TANTRA, is a Buddhist book, not a Hindu book. + +It is neither Hindu nor Buddhist — a technique is just a technique. Buddha used it, but it +was there already to be used. Buddha became a buddha, an enlightened one, because of +the technique. The technique preceded Buddha; the technique was already there. Try it. It +is one of the most simple techniques — simple compared to other techniques; I am not +saying simple for you. Other techniques will be more difficult. That is why it is +mentioned as the first technique. + +The second technique — all these nine techniques are concerned with breath. + +AS BREATH TURNS FROM DOWN TO UP, AND AGAIN AS BREATH CURVES +FROM UP TO DOWN - THROUGH BOTH THESE TURNS, REALIZE. + +It is the same, but with a slight difference. The emphasis is now not on the gap, but on the +turning. The outgoing and ingoing breath make a circle. Remember, these are not two +parallel lines. We always think of them as two parallel lines — breath going in and breath +going out. Do you think that these are two parallel lines? They are not. Breath going in is +half the circle; breath going out is the other half of the circle. + +So understand this: first, breathing in and out creates a circle. + +They are not parallel lines, because parallel lines never meet anywhere. Secondly, the +breath coming in and the breath going out are not two breaths, they are one breath. The +same breath which comes in, goes out, so it must have a turn inside. It must turn +somewhere. There must be a point where the incoming breath becomes outgoing. + +Why put such emphasis upon turning? Because, Shiva says, AS BREATH TURNS +FROM DOWN TO UP AND AGAIN AS BREATH CURVES FROM UP TO DOWN, +THROUGH BOTH THESE TURNS, REALIZE. Very simple, but he says: realize the +turns and you will realize the self. + +Why the turn? If you know driving you know about gears. Each time you change the + + + +gear, you have to pass through the neutral gear, which is not a gear at all. From the first +gear you move to the second or from the second to the third, but always you have to +move through the neutral gear. That neutral gear is a turning point. In that turning point +the first gear becomes the second and the second becomes the third. When your breath +goes in and turns out, it passes through the neutral gear; otherwise it cannot turn out. It +passes through the neutral territory. + +In that neutral territory you are neither a body nor a soul, neither physical nor mental, +because the physical is a gear of your being and the mental is another gear of your being. +You go on moving from gear to gear, but you must have a neutral gear where you are +neither body nor mind. + +In that neutral gear you simply are: you are simply an existence — pure, simple, +unembodied, with no mind. + +That is why there is the emphasis on the turn. Man is a machine — a large, very +complicated machine. You have many gears in your body, many gears in your mind. You +are not aware of your great mechanism, but you are a great machine. And it is good that +you are not aware; otherwise you could go mad. The body is such a great machine that +scientists say if we had to create a factory parallel to the human body, it would require +four square miles of land, and the noise would be such that one hundred square miles of +land would be disturbed by it. + +The body is a great mechanical device — the greatest. You have millions and millions of +cells and each cell is alive. So you are a big city of seventy million cells; there are +seventy million citizens inside you, and the whole city is running very silently, smoothly. +Every moment the mechanism is working. It is very complicated. These techniques will +be related at many points with the mechanism of your body and the mechanism of your +mind. But always the emphasis will be on those points where suddenly you are not part of +the mechanism — remember this. Suddenly you are not part of the mechanism. There are +moments when you change gears. + +For example, in the night when you drop into sleep you change gears, because during the +day you need a different mechanism for a waking consciousness — a different part of the +mind functions. + +Then you drop into sleep, and that part becomes non-functioning. Another part of the +mind begins to function, and there is a gap, an interval, a turning. A gear is changed. In +the morning when you are again getting up, the gear is changed. You are silently sitting, +and suddenly someone says something and you get angry — you move into a different +gear. That is why everything changes. + +If you get angry, your breathing will suddenly change. Your breathing will become +irritated, chaotic. A trembling will get into your breathing; you will feel suffocated. Your +whole body would like to do something, shatter something, only then can the suffocation +disappear. Your breathing will change; your blood will take a different rhythm, a +different movement. Different chemicals will have to be released in the body, the whole +glandular system will have to change. You become a different man when you are angry. + +A car is standing... you start it. Do not put it in any gear, let it be in neutral. It will go on +pulling, vibrating, trembling, but it cannot move; it will get hot. That is why, when you +are angry and you cannot do something, you will get hot. The mechanism is ready to run +and do something and you are not doing — you will get hot. Y ou are a mechanism, but, of +course, not only a mechanism. You are more, but the "more" has to be found. When you + + + +get into a gear, everything changes inside. + + +When you change the gear, there is a turning. + +Shiva says, + +AS BREATH TURNS FROM DOWN TO UP, AND AGAIN AS BREATH CURVES +FROM UP TO DOWN - THROUGH BOTH THESE TURNS, REALIZE. + +Be aware at the turn. But it is a very short turn; very minute observation will be needed. +And we are just without any observing capacity; we cannot observe anything. If I say to +you, "Observe this flower; observe this flower which I give to you," you cannot observe +it. For a single moment you will see it, and then you will begin to think of something +else. It may be about the flower, but it will not be THE FLOWER. You may think about +the flower, about how beautiful it is — then you have moved. Now the flower is no more +in your observation, your field has changed. You may say that it is red, it is blue, it is +white... then you have moved. Observation means remaining with no word, with no +verbalization, with no bubbling inside — just remaining WITH. If you can remain with a +flower for three minutes, completely, with no movement of the mind, the thing will +happen — the beneficence. You will realize. + +But we are not at all observers. We are not aware, we are not alert; we cannot pay +attention to anything. We just go on jumping. This is part of our heritage, our monkey +heritage. Our mind is just the growth of the monkey mind, so the monkey moves on. He +goes on jumping from here to there. + +The monkey cannot sit still. That is why Buddha insisted so much on just sitting without +any movement, because then the monkey mind is not allowed to go on its way. + +In Japan they have a particular type of meditation which they call Zazen. The word +'zazen’ in Japan means just sitting, doing nothing. No movement is allowed. One is just +sitting like a statue — dead, not moving at all. But there is no need to sit like a statue for +years together. If you can observe the turn of your breath without any movement of the +mind, you will enter. Y ou will enter into yourself or into the beyond within. + +Why are these turnings so important? They are important because on turning, the breath +leaves you to move in a different direction. It was with you when it was coming in; it will +be with you again when it goes out. But at the turning point it is not with you and you are +not with it. In that moment the breath is different from you, and you are different from it: +if breathing is life, then you are dead; if breathing is your body, then you are no-body; if +breathing is your mind, then you are no-mind... in that moment. + +I wonder whether you have observed it or not: if you stop your breath, the mind stops +suddenly. If you stop your breath just now, your mind will stop suddenly; the mind +cannot function. A sudden stoppage of breath and the mind stops. Why? Because they are +disjoined. + +Only a moving breath is joined with the mind, with the body; a non-moving breath is +disjoined. Then you are in the neutral gear. The car is running, the power is on, the car is +making a noise — it is ready to go forward — but it is not in gear, so the body of the car +and the mechanism of the car are not joined. The car is divided into two. It is ready to +move, but the moving mechanism is not joined with it. + +The same happens when breath takes a turn. You are not joined with it. In that moment +you can easily become aware of who you are. What is this being? What is it to be? Who +is inside this house of the body? Who is the master? Am I just the house or is there some + + + +master also? Am I just the mechanism or does something else also penetrate this +mechanism? In that turning gap, Shiva says, REALIZE. He says just be aware of the +turning, and you become a realized soul. + +The third technique: + +OR, WHENEVER IN-BREATH AND OUT-BREATH FUSE, AT THIS INSTANT +TOUCH THE ENERGY-LESS, ENERGY-FILLED CENTER. + +We are divided into the center and the periphery. The body is the periphery; we know the +body, we know the periphery. We know the circumference, but we do not know where +the center is. When the out-breath fuses with the in-breath, when they become one, when +you cannot say whether it is the out-breath or the in-breath... when it is difficult to +demarcate and define whether the breath is going out or coming in, when the breath has +penetrated in and starts moving out, there is a moment of fusion. + +It is neither going out nor moving in. The breath is static. When it is moving out it is +dynamic; when it is coming in it is dynamic. When it is neither, when it is silent, non- +moving, you are near to the center. The fusion point of the in and outgoing breath is your +center. + +Look at it in this way: when the breath goes in, where does it go? It goes to your center, it +touches your center. When it goes out, from where does it go out? It moves from your +center. Your center has to be touched. That is why Taoist mystics and Zen mystics say +that the head is not the center, the navel is your center. The breath goes to the navel, then +it moves out. It goes to the center. + +As I said, it is a bridge between you and your body. You know the body, but you do not +know where your center is. The breath is constantly going to the center and moving out, +but we are not taking enough breath. Thus, ordinarily it does not really go to the center — +now, at least, it is not going to the center. That is why everyone feels "off-center." In the +whole modern world, those who can think at all feel they are missing their center. + +Look at a child sleeping, observe his breath. The breath goes in; the abdomen comes up. +The chest remains unaffected. That is why children have no chests, only abdomens — +very dynamic abdomens. The breath goes in and the abdomen comes up; the breath goes +out and the abdomen goes down. + +.. the abdomen moves. Children are in their center, at their center. That is why they are so +happy, so bliss-filled, so energy-filled, never tired — overflowing, and always in the +present moment with no past, no future. + +A child can be angry. When he is angry, he is totally angry; he becomes the anger. Then +his anger is also a beautiful thing. When one is totally angry, anger has a beauty of its +own, because totality always has beauty. + +You cannot be angry and beautiful, you will become ugly, because partiality is always +ugly. And not only with anger. When you love you are ugly because you are again +partial, fragmentary; you are not total. Look at your face when you are loving someone, +making love. Make love before a mirror and look at your face — it will be ugly, animal- +like. In love also your face becomes ugly. Why? Love is also a conflict, you are +withholding something. You are giving very miserly. Even in your love you are not total; +you do not give completely, wholly. + +A child even in anger and violence is total. His face becomes radiant and beautiful; he is +here and now. His anger is not something concerned with the past or something + + + +concerned with the future, he is not calculating, he is just angry. The child is at his center. +When you are at your center you are always total. Whatsoever you do will be a total act; +good or bad, it will be total. When you are fragmentary, when you are off-center, your +every act is bound to be a fragment of yourself. + +Your totality is not responding, just a part, and the part is going against the whole — that +creates ugliness. + +We all were children. Why is it that as we grow our breathing becomes shallow? It never +goes to the abdomen; it never touches the navel. If it could go down more and more it +would become less and less shallow, but it just touches the chest and goes out. It never +goes to the center. You are afraid of the center, because if you go to the center you will +become total. If you want to be fragmentary, this is the mechanism to be fragmentary. +You love — if you breathe from the center, you will flow in it totally. You are afraid. You +are afraid to be so vulnerable, so open to someone, to anyone. You may call him your +lover, you may call her your beloved, but you are afraid. The other is there. If you are +totally vulnerable, open, you do not know what is going to happen. Then YOU ARE +completely, in another sense. You are afraid to be so completely given to someone. You +cannot breathe; you cannot take a deep breath. You cannot relax your breathing so that it +goes to the center — because the moment breathing goes to the center your act becomes +total. + +Because you are afraid of being total, you breathe shallowly. You breathe just at the +minimum, not at the maximum. That is why life seems so lifeless. If you are breathing at +the minimum, life will become lifeless; you are living at the minimum, not at the +maximum. + +You can live at the maximum — then life is an overflowing. But then there will be +difficulty. You cannot be a husband, you cannot be a wife, if life is overflowing. +Everything will become difficult. + +If life is overflowing, love will be overflowing. Then you cannot stick to one. Then you +will be flowing all over; all dimensions will be filled by you. And then the mind feels +danger, so it is better not to be alive. The more you are dead, the more you are secure. + +The more you are dead, the more everything is in control. You can control; then you +remain the master. You feel that you are the master because you can control. You can +control your anger, you can control your love, you can control everything. But this +controlling is possible only at the minimum level of your energy. + +Everyone must have felt at some time or other that there are moments when he suddenly +changes from the minimum level to the maximum. You go out to a hill station. Suddenly +you are out of the city and the prison of it. You feel free. The sky is vast, and the forest is +green, and the height touches the clouds. Suddenly you take a deep breath. You may not +have observed it. + +Now if you go to a hill station, observe. It is not really the hill station that makes the +change. It is your breathing. You take a deep breath. You say, "Ah! Ah!" You touch the +center, you become total for a moment, and everything is bliss. + +That bliss is not coming from the hill station, that bliss is coming from your center — you +have touched it suddenly. + +You were afraid in the city. Everywhere there were others present and you were +controlling. You could not scream, you could not laugh. What a misfortune! You could + + + +not sing on the street and dance. You were afraid — a policeman was somewhere around +the comer, or the priest or the judge or the politician or the moralist. Someone was just +around the corner, so you could not just dance in the street. + +Bertrand Russell has said somewhere, "I love civilization, but we have achieved +civilization at a very great cost." You cannot dance in the streets, but you go to a hill +station and suddenly you can dance. You are alone with the sky, and the sky is not an +imprisonment. It is just opening, opening and opening — vast, infinite. Suddenly you take +a breath deeply, it touches the center and the bliss. But it is not so for long. Within an +hour or two, the hill station will disappear. You may be there, but the hill station will +disappear. + +Your worries will come back. You will begin to think to make a call to the city, to write a +letter to your wife, or you will begin to think that since after three days you are going +back you should make arrangements. You have just reached and you are making +arrangements to leave. You are back. + +That breath was not from you really; it suddenly happened. + +Because of the change of situation the gear changed. You were in a new situation, you +could not breathe in the old way, so for a moment a new breath came in. It touched the +center, and you felt the bliss. + +Shiva says you are every moment touching the center, or if you are not touching you +CAN touch it. Take deep, slow breaths. Touch the center; do not breathe from the chest — +that is a trick. Civilization, education, morality, they have created shallow breathing. It +will be good to go deep into the center, because otherwise you cannot take deep breaths. +Unless humanity becomes non-suppressive toward sex, man cannot breathe really. If the +breath goes deep down to the abdomen, it gives energy to the sex center. It touches the +sex center; it massages the sex center from within. The sex center becomes more active, +more alive. Civilization is afraid of sex. We do not allow our children to touch their sex +centers, their sex organs. We say, "Stop! Don't touch!" + +Look at a child when he first touches his sex center, and then say "Stop!" and then +observe his breathing. When you say "Stop! Don’t touch your sex center!" the breath will +become shallow immediately — because it is not only his hand which is touching the sex +center, deep down the breath is touching it. And if the breath goes on touching at, it is +difficult to stop the hand. If the hand stops, then basically it is necessary, required, that +the breath should not touch, should not go deep. + +It must remain shallow. + +We are afraid of sex. The lower part of the body is not only lower physically, it has +become lower as a value. It is condemned as "lower." So do not go deep, just remain +shallow. It is unfortunate that we can only breathe downwards. If some preachers were +allowed, they would change the whole mechanism. They would only allow you to breathe +upward into the head. Then you would absolutely not feel sex. + +If we are to create a sexless humanity, then we will have to change the breathing system. +The breath must go into the head, to the SAHASRAR — the seventh center in the head — +then come back to the mouth. This should be the passage: from the mouth to the sahasrar. +It must not go deep down because down is dangerous. The deeper you go, the nearer you +reach to the deeper layers of biology. You reach to the center, and that center is just near +the sex center — just near. It has to be, because sex is life. + +Look at it in this way: breath is life from above downwards; sex is life from just the other + + + +comer — from down upwards. Sex energy is flowing and breath energy is flowing. The +breath passage is in the upper body and the sex passage is in the lower body. When they +meet they create life; when they meet they create biology, bio-energy. So if you are afraid +of sex, create a distance between the two, do not allow them to meet. So really, civilized +man is a castrated man; that is why we do not know about breath, and this sutra will be +difficult to understand. + + +Shiva says, WHENEVER IN-BREATH AND OUT-BREATH FUSE, AT THIS +INSTANT TOUCH THE ENERGY-LESS, ENERGY-FILLED CENTER. He uses very +contradictory terms: "energy-less, energy-filled." It is energy-less because your bodies, +your minds, cannot give any energy to it. Your body energy is not there, your mind +energy is not there, so it is energy-less as far as you know your identity. But it is energy- +filled because it has the cosmic source of energy, not because of your body energy. + +Your body energy is just fuel energy. It is nothing but petrol. You eat something, you +drink something — it creates energy. It is just giving fuel to the body. Stop eating and +drinking and your body will fall dead. Not just now, it will take three months at least, +because you have reservoirs of petrol. You have accumulated much energy; it can run for +at least three months without going to any petrol station. It can ran; it has a reservoir. For +an emergency, any emergency, you may need it. + +This is "fuel" energy. The center is not getting any fuel energy. That is why Shiva says it +is energy-less. It is not dependent on your eating and drinking. It is connected with the +cosmic source; it is cosmic energy. That is why he says ENERGY- LESS, ENERGY- +FILLED CENTER. The moment you can feel the center from where breath goes out or +comes in, the very point where the breaths fuse — that center — if you become aware of it, +then enlightenment. + + +The fourth technique: + +OR, WHEN BREATH IS ALL OUT (UP) AND STOPPED OF ITSELF, OR ALL IN +(DOWN) AND STOPPED - IN SUCH UNIVERSAL PAUSE, ONE’S SMALL SELF +VANISHES. THIS IS DIFFICULT ONLY FOR THE IMPURE. But then it is difficult +for everyone because, he says, THIS IS DIFFICULT ONLY FOR THE IMPURE. But +who is the pure one? It is difficult for you; you cannot practice it. But you can feel it +sometimes suddenly. You are driving a car and suddenly you feel there is going to be an +accident. Breathing will stop. If it is out, it will remain out. If it is in, it will remain in. +You cannot breathe in such an emergency; you cannot afford it. Everything stops, +departs. + +OR, WHEN BREATH IS ALL OUT (UP) AND STOPPED OF ITSELF, OR ALL IN +(DOWN) AND STOPPED - IN SUCH UNIVERSAL PAUSE, ONE’S SMALL SELF +VANISHES: Your small self is only a daily utility. In emergencies you cannot remember +it. Who you are — the name, the bank balance, the prestige, everything — just evaporates. +Your car is just heading toward another car; another moment and there will be death. In +this moment there will be a pause. Even for the impure there will be a pause. Suddenly +breathing stops. If you can be aware in that moment, you can reach the goal. + +Zen monks have tried this method very much in Japan. That is why their methods seem +very weird, absurd, strange. They have done many inconceivable things. + + + +A master will throw someone out of the house. Suddenly the master will begin slapping +the disciple without any rhyme or reason, without any cause. + +You were sitting with your master and everything was okay. You were just chit-chatting, +and he will begin to beat you in order to create the pause. If there is any cause the pause +cannot be created. If you had abused the master and he starts beating you there is a +causality, your mind understands: "I abused him, and he is beating me." + +Really, your mind was expecting it already, so there is no gap. But remember, a Zen +master will not beat you if you abuse him, he will laugh, because then laughter can create +the pause. You were abusing him and you were saying nonsense things to him, and you +expected anger. But he starts laughing or dancing. That is sudden; that will create the +pause. You cannot understand it. If you cannot understand the mind stops, and when the +mind stops, breathing stops. Either way — if breathing stops, mind stops; if mind stops, +breathing stops. + +You were appreciating the master and you were feeling good, and you were thinking, +"Now the master must be pleased." And suddenly he takes his staff and begins to beat +you — and mercilessly, because Zen masters are merciless. He begins to beat you; you +cannot understand what is happening. The mind stops, there is a pause. If you know the +technique, you can attain to your self. + +There are many stories that someone attained buddhahood because the teacher suddenly +started beating him. You cannot understand it — what nonsense! How can one attain +buddhahood by being beaten by someone, or by being thrown out of the window by +someone? Even if someone kills you, you cannot attain buddhahood. But if you +understand this technique, then it becomes easy to understand. + +In the West particularly, in the last thirty or forty years Zen has become very much +prevalent — a fashion. But unless they know this technique, they cannot understand Zen. +They can imitate it, but imitation is of no use. Rather, it is dangerous. These are not +things to be imitated. + +The whole Zen technique is based on the fourth technique of Shiva. But this is +unfortunate. Now we will have to import Zen from Japan because we have lost the whole +tradition; we do not know it. Shiva was the expert par excellence of this method. When +he came to marry Devi with his BARAT, his procession, the whole city must have felt +the pause... the whole city! + +Devi's father was not willing to marry his girl to this "hippie" — Shiva was the original +hippie. Devi's father was totally against him, and no father would pennit this marriage. + +So we cannot say anything against Devi's father. No father would pennit his daughter’s +marriage to Shiva. But Devi insisted so he had to agree — unwillingly, unhappily, but he +agreed. + + +Then came the marriage procession. It is said that people began to run, seeing Shiva and +his procession. The whole barat must have taken LSD, marijuana. They were "high." And +really, LSD and marijuana are just the beginning. Shiva knew and his friends and +disciples knew the ultimate psychedelic — SOMA RASA. Aldous Huxley has named the +ultimate psychedelic "soma" only because of Shiva. They were high, just dancing, +screaming, laughing. The whole city fled. It must have felt the pause. + +Any sudden, unexpected, unbelievable thing can create the pause for the impure. But for +the pure there is no need of such things. For the pure, the pause is always there. Many + + + +times, for pure minds, breathing stops. If your mind is pure — pure means you are not +desiring, hankering, seeking anything — silently pure, innocently pure, you can be sitting +and suddenly your breath will stop. + +Remember this: mind movement needs breath movement. Mind moving fast needs fast +movement in breath. That is why when you are in anger, breath will move fast. In the sex +act, the breath will move very fast. That is why in Ayurveda- a system of herbal medicine +in India- it is said that your life will be shortened if too much sex is allowed. Your life +will he shortened, according to Ayurveda, because Ayurveda measures your life in +breaths. If your breathing is too fast, your life will be shortened. + + +Modern medicine says that sex helps blood circulation, sex helps relaxation. And those +who suppress their sex may get into trouble — particularly heart trouble. They are right +and Ayurveda is also right, but they seem contradictory. But Ayurveda was invented five +thousand years before. Every man was doing much labor: life was labor, so there was no +need to relax, there was no need to create artificial devices for blood circulation. + +But now, for those who are not doing much physical labor, sex is their only labor. That is +why modern medicine is also right for modem man. He is not doing any physical +exertion, so sex gives the exertion: the heart beats more, the blood circulates faster, the +breathing becomes deep and goes to the center. So after the sex act you feel relaxed and +you can fall into sleep easily. Freud says that sex is the best tranquillizer, and it is — at +least for modem man. + +In sex breathing will become fast; in anger breathing will become fast. In sex the mind is +filled with desire, lust, impurity. When the mind is pure — no desire in the mind, no +seeking, no motivation; you are not going anywhere, but just remaining here and now as +an innocent pool... not even a ripple — then breathing stops automatically. There is no +need for it. + +On this path, the small self vanishes and you attain to the higher self, the supreme self. + +I think this will do for today. + + +THE END. + + + +Chapter 4: The deceptions of the mind + + +Question 1 + +HOW IS IT POSSIBLE THAT BY SIMPLY BECOMING AWARE AT A +PARTICULAR POINT IN THE BREATHING PROCESS ONE CAN ATTAIN +ENLIGHTENMENT? HOW IT IS POSSIBLE TO BECOME FREE FROM THE +UNCONSCIOUS BY JUST BEING AWARE OF SUCH A SMALL AND +MOMENTARY GAP IN THE BREATHING? + +This question is significant, and this question is likely to have occurred to many minds, +so many things have to be understood. First, it is thought that spirituality is a difficult +attainment. It is neither: that is, it is neither difficult nor an attainment. Whatsoever you +are, you are already spiritual. Nothing new is to be added to your being, and nothing is to +be discarded from your being; you are as perfect as possible. It is not that you are going +to be perfect sometime in the future, it is not that you have to do something arduous to be +yourself. It is not a journey to some other point somewhere else; you are not going +somewhere else. You are already there. That which is to be attained is already attained. +This idea must go deep, only then will you be able to understand why such simple +techniques can help. + +If spirituality is some attainment, then of course it is going to be difficult — not only +difficult, but really impossible. If you are not already spiritual, you cannot be, you never +can be, because how can one who is not spiritual be spiritual? If you are not divine +already then there is no possibility, there is no way. + +And no matter what effort you will make, effort made by one who is not already divine +cannot create divinity. If you are not divine, your effort cannot create divinity. Then it is +impossible. + +But the whole situation is totally opposite: you are already that which you want to attain. +The end of longing is already there, present in you. Here and now, this very moment, you +are that which is known as divine. The ultimate is here; it is already the case. That is why +simple techniques can help. It is not an attainment, but a discovery. It is hidden, and it is +hidden in very, very small things. + +The persona is just like clothes. Your body is here, hidden in clothes; in the same way +your spirituality is here, hidden in certain clothes. These clothes are your personality. + +You can be naked just here and now, and in the same way you can be naked in your +spirituality also. But you do not know what the clothes are. You do not know how you +are hidden in them; you do not know how to be naked. You have been in clothes so long +— for lives and lives and lives you have been in clothes — and you have been so identified +with the clothes, that now you do not think that these are clothes. You think these clothes +are you. That is the only barrier. + +For example, you have some treasure, but you have forgotten or you have not yet +recognized that this is a treasure, and you go on begging in the streets. + +.. you are a beggar. If someone says, "Go and look inside your house. You need not be a +beggar, you can be an emperor this very moment," the beggar is bound to say, "What +nonsense you are talking. How can I be an emperor this very moment? I have been +begging for years and still I am a beggar, and even if I go on begging for lives together, I +am not going to be an emperor. So how absurd and illogical your statement is, 'You can + + + +be an emperor this very moment.'" + +It is impossible. The beggar cannot believe it. Why? Because the begging mind is a long +habit. But if the treasure is just hidden in the house, then from simple digging, removing +the earth a little bit, the treasure will be there. And immediately he will not be a beggar +again, he will become an emperor. + +It is the same with spirituality: it is a hidden treasure. Nothing is to be achieved +somewhere in the future. You have not yet recognized it, but it is there already in you. +You are the treasure, but you go on begging. + +So simple techniques can help. Digging the earth, removing a little bit, is not a big effort, +and you can become an emperor immediately. You have to dig a little bit to remove the +earth. And when I say remove the earth, it is not only symbolically that I am saying it. +Literally your body is part of the earth, and you have become identified with the body. +Remove this earth a little bit, create a hole in it, and you will come to know the treasure. + + +That is why this question will occur to many. Really, to everyone this question will +occur: "So small a technique like this — being aware of your breathing, being aware of +the incoming breath and the outgoing breath, and then realizing the interval between the +two — is this enough?" Such a simple thing! Is this enough for enlightenment? Is this the +only difference between you and Buddha, that you have not realized the gap between two +breaths and Buddha has realized it — only this much? It seems illogical. The distance is +vast between a Buddha and you. The distance seems infinite. The distance between a +beggar and an emperor is infinite, but the beggar can immediately become an emperor if +the treasure is already hidden. + +Buddha was a beggar like you; he was not a buddha always. At a particular point the +beggar died, and he became the master. This is not a gradual process really; it is not that +Buddha goes on accumulating and then one day he is not the beggar and he becomes the +emperor. No, a beggar can never become an emperor if it is going to be an accumulation, +he will remain a beggar. He may become a rich beggar, but he will remain a beggar. And +a rich beggar is a bigger beggar than a poor beggar. + +Suddenly, one day Buddha realizes the inner treasure. Then he is no more a beggar, he +becomes a master. The distance between Gautam Siddharth and Gautam Buddha is +infinite. + +It is the same distance that is between you and a buddha. But the treasure is hidden within +you as much as it was hidden in Buddha. + +Take another example.... One man is bom with blind eyes, diseased eyes. For a blind +man, the world is a different thing. A small operation may change the whole thing, +because only the eyes have to be made all right. The moment the eyes are ready, the seer +is hidden behind and he will begin to look from the eyes. The seer is already there, only +windows are lacking. You are in a house with no windows. You can break a hole in the +wall, and suddenly you will look out. + +We are already that which we will be, which we should be, which we are to be. The +future is already hidden in the present; the whole possibility is here in the seed. Only a +window has to be broken, only a small surgical operation is needed. If you can +understand this, that spirituality is already there, already the case, then there is no +problem concerning how such a small effort can help. + + + +Really, no big effort is needed. Only small efforts are needed, and the smaller the better. +And if you work effortlessly it is still better. That is why it happens, many times it +happens, that the more you try, the harder it is to attain. Your very effort, your tension, +your occupiedness, your longing, your expectation, becomes the barrier. But with a very +small effort, an effortless effort as they call it in Zen — doing as if not doing — it happens +easily. + +The more you are mad after it, the less is the possibility, because where a needle is +needed you are using a sword. The sword will not be helpful. It may be bigger, but where +a needle is needed a sword will not do. + +Go to a butcher — he has very big instruments. And go to a brain surgeon: you will not +find such big instruments with the brain surgeon. And if you do find them, then escape +immediately! A brain surgeon is not a butcher. He needs very small instruments — the +smaller the better. + +Spiritual techniques are more subtle; they are not gross. They cannot be, because the +surgery is even more subtle. In the brain the surgeon is still doing something with gross +matter, but when you are working on spiritual planes the surgery becomes more and more +aesthetic. No gross matter is there. It becomes subtle — that is one thing. + +Secondly, the questioner asks, "If something is smaller, how can a bigger step be possible +through it?" This concept is irrational, unscientific. Now science knows that the smaller +the particle, the more atomic, the more explosive — the bigger really. The smaller it is, +the bigger the effect. Could you have conceived before 1945, could any imaginative poet +or dreamer have conceived that two atomic explosions would wipe out completely two +big cities in Japan — Hiroshima and Nagasaki? Two hundred thousand people were +simply wiped out of existence within seconds. + +And what was the explosive force used? An atom! The very smallest particle blew up two +big cities. You cannot see the atom. Not only with your eyes can you not see, you cannot +see by any means. The atom cannot be seen with any instrument; we can only see the +effects. + +So do not think that the Himalayas are bigger because they have such a big body. The +Himalayas are just impotent before an atomic explosion. One small atom can wipe out +the whole Himalayas. Size in gross material is not necessarily power. On the contrary, +the smaller the unit, the more penetrating. The smaller the unit, the more intensely it is +filled with power. + +These small techniques are atomic. Those who are doing bigger things do not know +atomic science. You will think that a person who is working with atoms is a small person +working with small things, and a person who is working with the Himalayas will look +very big. Hitler was working with great masses; Mao is working with great masses. And +Einstein and Planck, they were working in their laboratories with small units of matter — +energy particles. But ultimately, before Einstein's research politicians were just impotent. +They were working on a bigger canvas, but they did not know the secret of the small unit. +Moralists always work on big planes, but these are gross. The thing looks very big. They +devote their whole lives to moralizing, practicing this and that, to S ANY AM — control. + +They go on controlling; the whole edifice looks very big. + +Tantra is not concerned with this. Tantra is concerned with the atomic secrets in the +human being, in the human mind, in human consciousness. And tantra has achieved + + + +atomic secrets. These methods are atomic methods. If you can attain them, their result is +explosive, cosmic. + +Another point is to be noted. If you can say, "How is it that with such a small, simple +exercise one can become enlightened?" you are saying this without doing the exercise. If +you do it, then you will not say that this is a small, simple exercise. It looks this way +because within two or three sentences the whole exercise has been given. + +Do you know the atomic formula? Two or three words, and the whole formula is given. +And with those two or three words, those who can understand, those who can use those +words, can destroy the whole earth. The fonnula is very small. + +These too are formulas, so if you just look at the fonnula it will look to be a very, very +small, simple thing. It is not! Try to do it. When you do it, then you will know that it is +not so easy. It looks simple, but it is one of the deepest things. We will analyze the +process; then you will understand. + +When you take your breath in, you never feel the breath. You have never felt the breath. +You will immediately deny this. You will say, "This is not right. + +We may not be conscious continuously, but we feel the breath." No, you do not feel the +breath, you feel the passage. + +Look at the sea. Waves are there; you see the waves. But those waves are created by air, +wind. You do not see the wind, you see the effect on the water. When you take breath in +it touches your nostril. You feel the nostril, but you never know the breath. It goes down +— you feel the passage. It comes back — again you feel the passage. You never feel the +breath, you just feel the touch and the passage. + +This is not what is meant when Shiva says, BE AWARE. First you will become aware of +the passage, and when you have become completely aware of the passage, only then will +you begin, by and by, to be aware of the breath itself. And when you become aware of +the breath, then you will be capable of being aware of the gap, the interval. It is not so +easy as it looks. + +For tantra, for all seeking, there are layers of awareness. If I embrace you, first you will +become aware of my touch upon your body; not of my love, my love is not so gross. And +ordinarily we never become aware of love. We are aware only of the body in movement. +We know loving movements, we know non-loving movements — but we have never +known love itself. If I kiss you, you become aware of the touch, not of my love; that love +is a very subtle thing. And unless you become aware of my love the kiss is just dead, it +means nothing. + +If you can become aware of my love, then only can you become aware of me, because +that again is a deeper layer. + +The breath goes in. You feel the touch, not the breath. But you are not even aware of that +touch. If something is wrong, only then do you feel it. If you have some difficulty in +breathing, then you feel it; otherwise you are not aware. The first step will be to be aware +of the passage where breath is felt to be touching; then your sensitivity will grow. It will +take years to become so sensitive that not the touch, but the movement of breath is +known. Then, says tantra, you will have known PRANA — the vitality. And only then is +there the gap where breath stops, where breath is not moving — or the center where the +breath is touching, or the fusion point, or the turning where the breath, the ingoing breath, +becomes outgoing. This will become arduous; then it will not be so simple. + +If you do something, if you go into this center, only then will you know how difficult it + + + +is. Buddha took six years to come to this center beyond the breath. To come to this +turning, he had a long, arduous journey of six years; then it happened. Mahavir was +working on it for twelve years; then it happened. But the formula is simple, and +theoretically this can happen this very moment — theoretically, remember. There is no +barrier theoretically, so why should it not happen this very moment? YOU are the barrier. + +Except for you this can happen this very moment. The treasure is there; the method is +known to you. You can dig, but you will not dig. + +Even this question is a trick not to dig, because your mind says, "Such a simple thing? +Don’t be a fool. How can you become a buddha through such a simple thing? It is not +going to be." And then you are not going to do anything, because how can this happen? +Mind is tricky. If I say this is very difficult, the mind says, "This is so difficult it is +beyond you." If I say this is very simple, the mind says, "This is so simple that only fools +can believe in it." And mind goes on rationalizing things, always escaping from doing. +Mind creates barriers. It will become a barrier if you think this is so simple, or this is too +difficult — then what are you going to do? You cannot do a simple thing, you cannot do a +difficult thing. What are you going to do? Tell me! If you want to do a difficult thing, I +will make it difficult. If you are going to do a simple thing, I will make it simple. It is +both — it depends on how it is interpreted. But one thing is needed, that you are going to +DO. If you are not going to do then the mind will always give you explanations. +Theoretically, it is possible here and now; there is no actual barrier. But there are +barriers. They may not be actual, they may simply be psychological — they may just be +your illusions — but they are there. + +If I say to you, "Do not be afraid — go! The thing that you are thinking is a snake is not a +snake, it is just a rope," still the fear will be there. To you it appears to be a snake. + +So whatsoever I say is not going to help. You are trembling; you want to escape and run +away. I say it is just a rope, but your mind will say, "This man may be in conspiracy with +the snake. There must be something wrong. This man is forcing me toward the snake. He +may be interested in my death, or something else." If I try to convince you too much that +this is a rope, that will only show that I am somehow interested in forcing you toward the +snake. If I say to you that theoretically it is possible to see the rope as a rope this very +moment, your mind will create many, many problems. + +In reality there is no dilemma; in reality there is no problem. There never has been, there +never will be. In mind there are problems, and you look at reality through the mind; thus, +the reality becomes problematic. Your mind works like a prison. It divides and creates +problems. And not only that, it creates solutions which become deeper problems, because +in fact there are no problems to be solved. Reality is absolutely unproblematic; there is no +problem. But you cannot see anything without problems. Wherever you look, you create +problems. Your "look" is problematic. I told you this breath technique; now the mind +says, "This is so simple." + +Why? Why does the mind say this is so simple ? + +When for the first time the steam engine was invented, no one believed it. It looked so +simple — unbelievable. Just the same steam that you know in your kitchen, in your kettle, +the steam running an engine, running hundreds and hundreds of passengers and such a +load? The same steam that you are so well-acquainted with? This is not believable. + +Do you know what happened in England? When the first train started, no one was ready + + + +to sit in it — no one! Many people were persuaded, bribed, they were given money to sit +in the train, but at the last point they escaped. They said, "Firstly, steam cannot do such +miracles. Such a simple thing as steam cannot do such miracles. And if the engine starts, +that means that the devil is at work somewhere. The devil is running the thing, it is not +the steam. And what is the guarantee that once the thing starts you will be capable of +stopping it?" + +No guarantee could be given because this was the first train. Never had it stopped before, +it was only probable. There was no experience, so science could not say, "Yes it will +stop." Theoretically it will stop... but the people were not interested in theories. They +were interested if there was any actual experience of stopping a train: "If it never stops +then what will happen to us who will be sitting in it?" + +So twelve criminals from the jail were brought as passengers. + +Anyhow they were going to die, anyhow they were sentenced to death, so there was no +problem if the train was not going to stop. Then the mad driver who thought that it was +going to stop, the scientist who had invented it and these twelve passengers who were +anyhow going to be killed, they alone would all be killed. "Such a simple thing as +steam," they said at that time. But now no one says this, because now it is working and +you know it. + +Everything is simple — reality is simple. It seems complex only because of ignorance; +otherwise everything is simple. Once you know it, it becomes simple. The knowing is +bound to be difficult not because of reality, remember, but because of your mind. This +technique is simple, but it is not going to be simple for you. Your mind will create +difficulty. So try with it. + +Another friend says, IF I TRY THIS METHOD OF BEING AWARE OF MY +BREATHING, IF I PAY ATTENTION TO MY BREATHING, THEN I CANNOT DO +ANYTHING ELSE, THE WHOLE ATTENTION GOES TO IT. AND IF I AM TO DO +ANYTHING ELSE THEN I CANNOT BE AWARE OF MY BREATHING. + +This will happen, so in the beginning choose a particular period in the morning, or in the +evening, or at any time. For one hour just do the exercise; do not do anything else. Just +do the exercise. Once you become attuned to it, then it will not be a problem. You can +walk on the street and you can be aware. + +Between 'awareness’ and 'attention’ there is a difference. + +When you pay attention to anything it is exclusive; you have to withdraw your attention +from everywhere else. So it is a tension really. That is why it is called attention. You pay +attention to one thing at the cost of everything else. If you pay attention to your +breathing, you cannot pay attention to your walking or to your driving. Do not try it while +you are driving because you cannot pay attention to both. + +Attention means one thing exclusively. Awareness is a very different thing; it is not +exclusive. It is not paying attention, it is being attentive; it is just being conscious. You +are conscious when you are inclusively conscious. Your breathing is in your +consciousness. You are walking and someone is passing, and you are also conscious of +him. Someone is making noise on the road, some train passes by, some airplane flies by +— everything is included. Awareness is inclusive, attention exclusive. But in the +beginning it will be attention. + +So first try in selected periods. For one hour just be attentive to your breathing. By and +by you will be able to change your attention into awareness. Then do simple things — for + + + +example, walking, walk attentively with full awareness of walking and also of breathing. +Do not create any opposition between the two actions of walking and breathing. Be a +watcher of both. It is not difficult. + +Look! For example, I can pay attention to one face here. + +If I pay attention to one face, all the faces will not be here for me. If I pay my attention to +one face, then all the rest are bracketed out. If I pay attention only to the nose on that +face, then the whole face, the remaining face, is bracketed out. I can go on narrowing +down my attention to a single point. + +The reverse is also possible. I pay attention to the whole face; then eyes and nose and +everything are there. Then I have made my focus wider. I look at you not as individuals, +but as a group. Then the whole group is in my attention. If I take you as different from +the noise that is going on the street, then I am bracketing out the street. But I can look at +you and the street as one whole. Then I can be aware of both you and the street. I can be +aware of the whole cosmos. It depends on your focus — on its becoming greater and +greater. But first start from attention and remember that you have to grow into awareness. +So choose a small period. The morning is good because you are fresh, energies are vital, +everything is rising; you are more alive in the morning. + +Physiologists say that not only are you more alive, but your height is a little more in the +morning than in the evening. If you are six feet tall, then in the morning you are six feet +and one half inch and in the evening you go back to six feet. Half an inch is lost because +your spine settles down when it is tired. + +So in the morning you are fresh, young, alive with energy. + +Do this: do not make meditation the last thing on your schedule. Make it the first. Then +when you feel that now it is not an effort, when you can sit for an hour together +completely immersed in breathing — aware, attentive — when you only know this, that +you have achieved attention of breathing without any effort; when you are relaxed and +enjoying it without any forcing, then you have attained it. + +Then add something else — for example, walking. Remember both; then go on adding +things. After a certain period you will be capable of being aware of your breath +continuously, even in sleep. And unless you are aware even in sleep you will not be able +to know the depth. But this comes, by and by this comes. + +One has to be patient and one has to start rightly. Know this, because the cunning mind +will always try to give you a wrong start. Then you can leave it after two or three days +and say, "This is hopeless." The mind will give you a wrong start. So always remember +to begin rightly, because rightly begun means half done. But we start wrongly. + +You know very well that attention is a difficult thing. This is because you are totally +asleep. So if you start being attentive to breathing while you are doing something else, +you cannot do it. And you are not going to leave the task, you will leave the effort of +being attentive to breathing. + + +So do not create unnecessary problems for yourself. In twenty-four hours you can find a +small corner. Forty minutes will do... so do the technique there. But the mind will give +many excuses. The mind will say, "Where is the time? There is already too much work to +be done. Where is the time?" Or the mind will say, "It is not possible now, so postpone it. +Sometime in the future when things are better, then you will do it." Beware of what your + + + +mind says to you. Do not be too trusting of the mind. And we are never doubtful. We can +doubt everyone but we never doubt our own minds. + +Even those who talk so much of skepticism, of doubt, of reason, even they never doubt +their own minds. And your mind has brought you to the state you are in. If you are in a +hell, your mind has brought you to this hell, and you never doubt this guide. You can +doubt any teacher, any master, but you never doubt your mind. With unflinching faith, +you move with your mind as the guru. And your mind has brought you to the mess, to the +misery that you are. If you are going to doubt anything, doubt first your own mind. And +whenever your mind says something, think twice. + +Is it true that you do not have any time? Really? You do not have any time to meditate — +to give one hour to meditation? Think twice. Ask again and again to the mind, "Is this the +case, that I do not have any time?" + +I don’t see it. + +I have not seen a man who does not have more than enough time. I go on seeing people +who are playing cards, and they say, "We are killing time." They are going to the movies +and they say, "What to do?" They are killing time, gossiping, reading the same +newspaper again and again, talking about the same things they have been talking about +for their whole lives, and they say, "We don't have any time." For unnecessary things +they have enough time. Why? + +With an unnecessary thing mind is not in any danger. The moment you think of +meditation, mind becomes alert. Now you are moving in a dangerous dimension, because +meditation means the death of the mind. If you move into meditation, sooner or later your +mind will have to dissolve, retire completely. The mind becomes alert and it begins to say +many things to you: "Where is the time? And even if there is time, then more important +things are to be done. First postpone it until later. You can meditate at any time. Money is +more important. Gather money first, then meditate at your leisure. How can you meditate +without money? So pay attention to money, then meditate later on." + +Meditation can be postponed easily, you feel, because it is not concerned with your +immediate survival. Bread cannot be postponed — you will die. Money cannot be +postponed — it is needed for your basic necessities. Meditation can be postponed, you can +survive without it. + +Really, you can survive without it easily. + +The moment you go deep in meditation, you will not survive on this earth at least — you +will disappear. From the circle of this life, this wheel, you will disappear. Meditation is +like death, so the mind becomes afraid. Meditation is like love, so the mind becomes +afraid. "Postpone," it says, and you can go on postponing ad infinitum. Your mind is +always saying things like this. And do not think I am talking about others. I am talking +particularly about YOU. + +I have come across many intelligent people who go on saying very unintelligent things +about meditation. One man came from Delhi; he is a big government official. He came +only for the purpose of learning meditation here. He had come from Delhi, and he stayed +seven days here. I told him to go to the morning meditation class on Chowpatty beach in +Bombay, but he said, "But that is difficult. I cannot get up so early." And he will never +think over what his mind has told him. Is this so difficult? Now you will know: the +exercise can be simple, but your mind is not so simple. The mind says, "How can I get up +in the morning at six o'clock?" + + + +I was in a big city, and the collector of that city came to meet me at eleven o’clock at +night. I was just going to my bed, and he came and said, "No! It is urgent. I am very +disturbed. It is a question of life and death," he told me. + +"So please give me at least half an hour. Teach me meditation; otherwise I might commit +suicide. I am very much disturbed, and I am so frustrated that something must happen in +my inner world. My outer world is lost completely." + +I told him, "Come in the morning at five o'clock." He said, "That is not possible." It is a +question of life and death, but he cannot get up at five o'clock. He said, "That is not +possible. I never get up so early." + +Okay," I told him, "Then come at ten." + +He said, "That will also be difficult because by ten- thirty I am to be present at my +office." + +He cannot take one day's leave, and it is a question of life and death. So I told him, "Is it +a question of your life and death or my life and death? Whose?" And he was not an +unintelligent man, he was intelligent enough. These tricks were very intelligent. + +So do not think that your mind is not playing the same tricks. It is very intelligent, and +because you think it is your mind you never doubt it. It is not yours, it is just a social +product. It is not yours! It has been given to you, it has been forced upon you. You have +been taught and conditioned in a certain way. From the very childhood your mind has +been created by others — parents, society, teachers. The past is creating your mind, +influencing your mind. The dead past is forcing itself upon the living continuously. + +The teachers are just the agents — agents of the dead against the living. They go on +forcing things upon your mind. But the mind is so intimate with you, the gap is so small, +that you become identified with it. + +You say, "I am a Hindu." Think again, reconsider it. YOU are not a Hindu. You have +been given a Hindu mind. You were bom just a simple, innocent being — not a Hindu, +not a Mohammedan. But you were given a Mohammedan mind, a Hindu mind. You were +forced, encaged, imprisoned in a particular condition, and then life goes on adding to this +mind and this mind becomes heavy — heavy on you. You cannot do anything; the mind +starts forcing its own way upon you. Your experiences are being added to the mind. +Constantly, your past is conditioning your every present moment. If I say something to +you, you are not going to think about it in a fresh way, in an open way. Your old mind, +your past will come in between, will begin to talk and chatter for or against. + +Remember, your mind is not yours, your body is not yours; it comes from your parents. +Your mind is also not yours; it also comes from your parents. Who are you? + +Either one is identified with the body or with the mind. You think you are young, you +think you are old, you think you are a Hindu, you think you are a Jain, you are a Parsee. +You are not! You were bom as a pure consciousness. These are all imprisonments. + +These techniques which look so simple to you will not be so simple, because this mind +will create constantly many, many complexities and problems. + +Just a few days before, a man came to me and he said, "I am trying your method of +meditation, but tell me, in what scripture is it given? If you can convince me that it is +given in my religious scripture, then it will be easier for me to do." But why will it be +easier for him to do if it is written in a scripture? Because then the mind will not create a +problem. The mind will say, "Okay! This belongs to us, so do it." If it is not written in + + + +any scripture then the mind will say, "What are you doing?" The mind goes against it. + +I said to the man, "You have been doing this method for three months. How are you +feeling?" He said, "Wonderful. I am feeling very wonderful. But tell me... give some +authority from the scriptures." His own feeling is not an authority at all. He says, "I am +feeling wonderful. I have become more silent, more peaceful, more loving. I am feeling +wonderful." But his own experience is not the authority. The mind asks for an authority +from the past. + +I told him, "It is not written anywhere in your scriptures. Rather, many things which are +against this technique are written." His face became sad. And then he said, "Then it will +be difficult for me to do it and to continue it." + +Why is his own experience not of any value? + +The past — the conditioning, the mind — is constantly molding you and destroying your +present. + +So remember, and be aware. Be skeptical and doubting about your mind. Do not trust it. +If you can attain to this maturity of not trusting your mind, only then will these +techniques be really simple, helpful, functioning. They will work miracles — they can +work miracles. + +These techniques, these methods cannot be understood intellectually at all. I am trying +the impossible, but then why am I trying? If they cannot be understood intellectually, +then why am I talking to you? They cannot be understood intellectually, but there is no +other way to make you aware of certain techniques which can change your life totally. +You can understand only intellect, and this is a problem. You cannot understand anything +else; you can understand only the intellect. And these techniques cannot be understood +intellectually, so how to communicate? + +Either you should become capable of understanding without intellect being brought in, or +some method should be found so that these techniques can be made intellectually +understandable. The second is not possible, but the first is possible. + +You will have to start intellectually, but do not cling to it. When I say "Do," try doing. If +something begins to happen within you, then you will be capable of throwing your +intellect aside and reaching toward me directly without the intellect, without any effort, +without the meditator. But start doing something. + +We can go on talking for years and years, your mind can be stuffed with many things, but +that is not going to help. Rather, it may harm you because you will begin to know many +things. And if you know many things you will become confused. It is not good to know +many things. It is good to know a little and to practice it. A single technique can be +helpful; something done is always helpful. What is the difficulty in doing it? + +Deep down somewhere there is fear. The fear is that if you do it, it may be that something +stops happening — that is the fear. It may look paradoxical, but I have been meeting so +many — so many persons — who think they want to change. They say they need +meditation, they ask for a deep transformation, but deep down they are also afraid. They +are dual — double; they have two minds. They go on asking about what to do, never +doing it. Why then do they go on asking? Just to deceive themselves that they are really +interested in transforming themselves. That is why they are asking. + +This gives a facade, an appearance that they are really, sincerely interested in changing +themselves. That is why they are asking, going to this guru and that, finding, trying, but +they never do anything. Deep down they are afraid. + + + +Eric Fromm has written a book, FEAR OF FREEDOM. The title seems contradictory. +Everyone thinks that they like freedom; everyone thinks that they are endeavoring for +freedom — in this world and in "that world" also. + +"We want MOKSHA — liberation — we want to be freed from all limitations, from all +slaveries. We want to be totally free," they say. But Eric Fromm says that man is afraid of +freedom. We want it, we go on saying that we want it, we go on convincing ourselves +that we want it, but deep down we are afraid of freedom. We do not want it! Why? Why +this duality? + +Freedom creates fear, and meditation is the deepest freedom possible. You are not freed +only from outward limitations, you are freed from inner slavery — the very mind, the base +of slavery. You are freed from the whole past. The moment you have no mind, the past +has disappeared. You have transcended history; now there is no society, no religion, no +scripture, no tradition, because they all have their abode in the mind. Now there is no +past, no future, because past and future are part of the mind, the memory and the +imagination. + +Then you are here and now in the present. Now there is not going to be any future. There +will be now and now and now — eternal now. Then you are freed completely; you +transcend all tradition, all history, body, mind, everything. One becomes free of the +fearful. Such freedom? Then where will YOU be? In such freedom, can you exist? In +such freedom, in such vastness, can you have your small "I" — your ego? Can you say "I +am?" + +You can say, "I am in bondage," because you can know your boundary. + +When there is no bondage there is no boundary. You become just a state, nothing more... +absolute nothingness, emptiness. That creates fear, so one goes on talking about +meditation, about how to do it, and one goes on without doing it. + +All the questions arise out of this fear. Feel this fear. If you know it, it will disappear. If +you do not know it, it will continue. Are you ready to die in the spiritual sense? Are you +ready to be NOT? + +Whenever anyone came to Buddha he would say, "This is the basic truth — that you are +not. And because you are not you cannot die, you cannot be bom; and because you are +not you cannot be in suffering, in bondage. Are you ready to accept this?" Buddha would +ask, "Are you ready to accept this? If you are not ready to accept this, then do not try +meditation now. First try to find out whether you really are or you are not. Meditate on +this first: is there any self? Is there any substance within or are you just a combination?" + +If you manage to find out, you will find that your body is a combination. Something has +come from your mother, something has come from your father, and all else has come +from food. This is your body. In this body you are NOT, there is no self. Contemplate on +the mind: something has come from here, something from there. Mind has nothing that is +original. It is just accumulation. + +Find out if there is any self in the mind. + +If you move deep, you will find that your identity is just like an onion. You peel off one +layer and another layer comes up; you peel off another layer and still another layer comes +up. You go on peeling layers off, and ultimately you come to a nothingness. With all the +layers thrown off, there is nothing inside. Body and mind are like onions. When you have +peeled off both body and mind, then you come to encounter a nothingness, an abyss, a + + + +bottomless void. Buddha called it SHUNYA. + +To encounter this shunya, to encounter this void, creates fear. That fear is there. That is +why we never do meditation. We talk about it, but we never do anything about it. That +fear is there. You know deep down that there is a void, but you cannot escape this fear. +Whatsoever you do, the fear will remain unless you encounter it. That is the only way. +Once you encounter your nothingness, once you know that within you are just like a +space, shunya, then there will be no fear. Then there cannot be any fear, because this +shunya, this void, cannot be destroyed. This void is not going to die. That which was +going to die is no more; it was nothing but the layers of an onion. + +That is why many times in deep meditation, when one comes nearer to this nothingness, +one becomes afraid and starts trembling. One feels that one is going to die, one wants to +escape from this nothingness back to the world. + +And many go back; then they never turn within again. As I see it, every one of you have +tried in some life or other some meditative technique. You have been near to the +nothingness, and then fear gripped you and you escaped. And deep in your past +memories, that memory is there; that becomes the hindrance. Whenever you again think +of trying meditation, that past memory deep down in your unconscious mind again +disturbs you and says, "Go on thinking; do not do it. You have done it once." + +It is difficult to find a man — and I have looked into many — who has not tried meditation +once or twice in some life. The memory is there, but you are not conscious of it, you are +not aware of where the memory is. It is there. Whenever you begin to do something that +becomes a barrier, this and that begin to stop you in many ways. So if you are really +interested in meditation, find out about your own fear of it. Be sincere about it: are you +afraid? If you are afraid, then first something has to be done about your fear, not about +meditation. + +Buddha used to try many devices. Sometimes someone would say to him, "I am afraid of +trying meditation." And this is a must: the master must be told that you are afraid. You +cannot deceive the master... and there is no need — it is deceiving yourself. So whenever +someone would say, "I am afraid of meditation," Buddha would say, "You are fulfilling +the first requirement." + +If you say yourself that you are afraid of meditation, then something becomes possible. +Then something can be done because you have uncovered a deep thing. So what is the +fear? Meditate on it. Go and dig out where it comes from, what the source is. + +All fear is basically death-oriented. Whatsoever its form, mode, whatsoever its shape, +name, all fear is death-oriented. If you move deep, you will find that you are afraid of +death. + +If someone came to Buddha and said, "I am afraid of death, I have found this out," +Buddha would say, "Then go to the burning ghat, go to the cemetery, and meditate on a +funeral pyre. People are dying daily — they will be burned. Just remain there at the +MARGHAT — cemetery — and meditate on the burning pyre. When their family +members have gone, you remain there. Just look into the fire, at the burning body. When +everything is becoming smoke, you just look at it deeply. Do not think, just meditate on it +for three months, six months, nine months. + +"When it becomes a certainty to you that death cannot be escaped, when it becomes +absolutely certain that death is the way of life, that death is implied in life, that death is +going to be, that there is no way out and you are already in it, only then come to me." + + + +After meditating on death, after seeing every day, night and day, dead bodies being +burned, dissolved into ashes — just a smoke remains and then disappears — after +meditating for months together, a certainty will arise: the certainty that death is +inevitable. + +It is the only certainty really. The only thing certain in life is death. Everything else is +uncertain: it may be or it may not be. But you cannot say that it may be or it may not be +for death. It is; it is going to be. It has already occurred. The moment you entered life, +you entered death. Now nothing can be done about it. + +When death is certain there is no fear. Fear is always with things which can be changed. + +If death is to be, fear disappears. If you can change, if you can do something about death, +then fear will remain. If nothing can be done, if you are already in it, then it is absolutely +certain that fear will disappear. When fear of death had disappeared, Buddha would allow +you to meditate. He would say, "Now you can meditate." + +So you also go deep into your mind. And listening to these techniques will be helpful +only when your inner barriers are broken, when inner fears disappear and you are certain +that death is the reality. So if you die in meditation there is no fear — death is certain. +Even if death occurs in meditation, there is no fear. Only then can you move — and then +you can move at rocket speed because the barriers are not there. + +It is not distance that takes time, but the barriers. You can move this very moment if there +is no barrier. You are already there but for the barrier. It is a hurdle race, and you go on +putting up more and more hurdles. + +You feel good when you cross a hurdle; you feel good that now you have crossed the +hurdle. And the idiocy of it, the foolishness of it, is that the hurdle was placed there by +you in the first place. It was never there. You go on putting up hurdles, then jumping over +them, then feeling good; then you go on putting up more hurdles, then jumping. You +move in a circle and never, never reach to the center. + +Mind creates hurdles because mind is afraid. It will give you many explanations as to +why you are not doing meditation. Do not believe it. Go deep, find out the basic cause. +Why does a person go on talking about food and yet never eat? What is the problem? The +man seems mad! + +Another man goes on talking about love and never loves, another man goes on talking +about something else and never does anything about it. This talking becomes obsessive; it +becomes a compulsion. One goes on, one sees talking as a doing. By talking you feel that +you are doing something, so you feel at ease. You are doing something — at least talking, +at least reading, at least listening. This is not doing. This is deceptive; do not fall into the +deception. + +I will be talking here about these one hundred and twelve methods not to feed your mind, +not to make you more knowledgeable, not to make you more infonned. I am not trying to +make you a pundit. I am talking here in order to give you a certain technique which can +change your life. + +So whichever method appeals to you, do not start talking about it — do it! Be silent about +it and do it. Your mind will raise many questions. Just inquire deeply first before asking +me. Inquire deeply first whether those questions are really significant or if your mind is +just deceiving you. + +Do, then ask. Then your questions become practical. And I know which question has + + + +been asked through doing and which question has been asked just through curiosity, just +through intellect. So by and by I will not answer your intellectual questions at all. Do +something — then your questions become significant. These questions which say, "This +exercise is a very simple one," are not asked after doing. This is NOT so simple. In the +end I must repeat again: + +You are already the truth. + +Only a certain awakening is needed. + +You are not to go anywhere else. You are to go into yourself, and the going is possible +this very moment. If you can put aside your mind, you enter here and now. + +These techniques are for putting your mind aside. These techniques are not really for +meditation; they are for putting the mind aside. Once the mind is not there, YOU ARE! + +I think this is enough for today, or even more than enough. + +THE END. + + + +Chapter 5: Five Techniques of attentiveness + + +5. ATTENTION BETWEEN EYEBROWS, LET MIND BE BEFORE THOUGHT. LET +FORM FILL WITH BREATH ESSENCE TO THE TOP OF THE HEAD AND THERE +SHOWER AS LIGHT. + +6. WHEN IN WORLDLY ACTIVITY, KEEP ATTENTION BETWEEN TWO +BREATHS, AND SO PRACTICING, IN A FEW DAYS BE BORN ANEW. + +7. WITH INTANGIBLE BREATH IN CENTER OF FOREHEAD, AS THIS REACHES +HEART AT THE MOMENT OF SLEEP, HAVE DIRECTION OVER DREAMS AND +OVER DEATH ITSELF. + +8. WITH UTMOST DEVOTION, CENTER ON THE TWO JUNCTIONS OF BREATH +AND KNOW THE KNOWER. + +9. LIE DOWN AS DEAD. ENRAGED IN WRATH, STAY SO. OR STARE WITHOUT +MOVING AN EYELASH. OR SUCK SOMETHING AND BECOME THE SUCKING. + +When one of the great Greek philosophers, Pythagoras, reached Egypt to enter a school — +a secret esoteric school of mysticism — he was refused. And Pythagoras was one of the +best minds ever produced. He could not understand it. He applied again and again, but he +was told that unless he goes through a particular training of fasting and breathing he +cannot be allowed to enter the school. + +Pythagoras is reported to have said, "I have come for knowledge, not for any sort of +discipline." But the school authorities said, "We cannot give you knowledge unless you +are different. And really, we are not interested in knowledge at all, we are interested in +actual experience. No knowledge is knowledge unless it is lived and experienced. + +So you will have to go on a forty-day fast, continuously breathing in a certain manner, +with a certain awareness on certain points." + +There was no other way, so Pythagoras had to pass through this training. After forty days +of fasting and breathing, aware, attentive, he was allowed to enter the school. It is said +that Pythagoras said, "You are not allowing Pythagoras in. I am a different man, I am +reborn. You were right and I was wrong, because then my whole standpoint was +intellectual. Through this purification, my center of being has changed. From the intellect +it has come down to the heart. Now I can feel things. Before this training I could only +understand through the intellect, through the head. Now I can feel. Now truth is not a +concept to me, but a life. It is not going to be a philosophy, but rather, an experience — +existential." + +What was that training he went through? This fifth technique was the technique that was +given to Pythagoras. It was given in Egypt, but the technique is Indian. + +The fifth technique: + +ATTENTION BETWEEN EYEBROWS, LET MIND BE BEFORE THOUGHT. LET +FORM FILL WITH BREATH ESSENCE TO THE TOP OF THE HEAD AND THERE +SHOWER AS LIGHT. This was the technique given to Pythagoras. Pythagoras went +with this technique to Greece, and really, he became the fountainhead, the source of all +mysticism in the West. He is the father of all mysticism in the West. + + + +This technique is one of the very deep methods. Try to understand this: ATTENTION +BETWEEN THE EYEBROWS... Modern physiology, scientific research, says that +between the two eyebrows is the gland which is the most mysterious part of the body. + +This gland, called the pineal gland, is the third eye of the Tibetans — SHIVANETRA: the +eye of the Shiva, of the tantra. Between the two eyes there exists a third eye, but it is non- +functioning. It is there, it can function any moment, but it does not function naturally. + +You have to do something about it to open it. It is not blind; it is simply closed. This +technique is to open the third eye. + +ATTENTION BETWEEN THE EYEBROWS... Close your eyes, then focus both of your +eyes just in the middle of the two eyebrows. Focus just in the middle, with closed eyes, as +if you are looking with your two eyes. Give total attention to it. + +This is one of the simplest methods of being attentive. You cannot be attentive to any +other part of the body so easily. This gland absorbs attention like anything. If you give +attention to it, both your eyes become hypnotized with the third eye. They become fixed; +they cannot move. If you are trying to be attentive to any other part of the body it is +difficult. This third eye catches attention, forces attention; It is magnetic for attention. So +all the methods all over the world have used it. It is the simplest to train you in attention +because not only are you trying to be attentive, the gland itself helps you; it is magnetic. + +Your attention is brought to it forcibly. It is absorbed. + +It is said in the old tantra scriptures that for the third eye attention is food. It is hungry; it +has been hungry for lives and lives. If you pay attention to it, it becomes alive. It +becomes alive! The food is given to it. And once you know that attention is food, once +you feel that your attention is magnetically drawn, attracted, pulled by the gland itself, +attention is not a difficult thing then. One has only to know the right point. So just close +your eyes, let your two eyes move just to the middle, and feel the point. When you are +near the point, suddenly your eyes will become fixed. When it becomes difficult to move +them, then know you have caught the right point. + +ATTENTION BETWEEN THE EYEBROWS, LET MIND BE BEFORE THOUGHT... + +If this attention is there, for the first time you will come to experience a strange +phenomenon. For the first time you will see thoughts running before you; you will +become the witness. It is just like a film screen: thoughts are running and you are a +witness. Once your attention is focused at the third eye center, you become immediately +the witness of thoughts. + +Ordinarily you are not the witness, you are identified with thoughts. If anger is there, you +become anger. If a thought moves, you are not the witness, you become one with the +thought, identified, and you move with it. + +You become the thought; you take the form of the thought. When sex is there you +become sex, when anger is there you become anger, when greed is there you become +greed. Any thought moving becomes identified with you. You do not have any gap +between you and the thought. + +But focused at the third eye, suddenly you become a witness. Through the third eye you +become the witness. Through the third eye you can see thoughts running like clouds in +the sky or people moving on the street. + +You are sitting at your window looking at the sky or at people in the street; you are not +identified. You are aloof, a watcher on the hill — different. Now if anger is there you can +look at it as an object. Now you do not feel that YOU are angry. You feel that you are + + + +surrounded by anger — a cloud of anger has come around you — but you are not the +anger. And if you are not the anger, anger becomes impotent, it cannot affect you; you +remain untouched. The anger will come and go and you will remain centered in yourself. +This fifth technique is a technique of finding the witness. ATTENTION BETWEEN THE +EYEBROWS, LET THE MIND BE BEFORE THOUGHT. Now look at your thoughts; +now encounter your thoughts. LET FORM FILL WITH BREATH ESSENCE TO THE +TOP OF THE HEAD AND THERE SHOWER AS LIGHT. When attention is focused at +the third eye center, between the two eyebrows, two things happen. One is, suddenly you +become a witness. + + +This can happen in two ways. You become a witness and you will be centered at the third +eye. Try to be a witness. Whatsoever is happening, try to be a witness. You are ill, the +body is aching and painful, you have misery and suffering, whatsoever — be a witness to +it. Whatsoever is happening, do not identify yourself with it. Be a witness, an observer. +Then if witnessing becomes possible, you will be focused in the third eye. + +The vice versa is the case also. If you are focused in the third eye, you will become a +witness. These two things are part of one. So the first thing: by being centered in the third +eye there will be the arising of the witnessing self. Now you can encounter your thoughts. +This will be the first thing. And the second thing will be that now you can feel the subtle, +delicate vibration of breathing. Now you can feel the fonn of breathing, the very essence +of breathing. + +First try to understand what is meant by "the fonn," by "the essence of breathing." While +you are breathing, you are not only breathing air. Science says you are breathing only air +— just oxygen, hydrogen, and other gases in their combined form of air. They say you are +breathing air! But tantra says that air is just the vehicle, not the real thing. You are +breathing prana — vitality. Air is just the medium; prana is the content. You are breathing +prana, not only air. + + +Modern science is still not able to find out whether there is something like prana, but +some researchers have felt something mysterious. Breathing is not simply air. It has been +felt by many modem researchers also. In particular, one name is to be mentioned — +Wilhelm Reich, a German psychologist who called it "orgone energy." It is the same +thing as prana. He says that while you are breathing, air is just the container and there is a +mysterious content which can be called orgone or prana or ELAN VITAL. But that is +very subtle. Really, it is not material. Air is the material thing — the container is material +— but something subtle, non-material, is moving through it. + +The effects of it can be felt. When you are with a very vital person, you will feel a certain +vitality arising in you. If you are with a very sick person you will feel sucked, as if +something has been taken out of you. When you go to the hospital, why do you feel so +tired? You are being sucked from everywhere. The whole hospital atmosphere is ill, and +everyone there needs more elan vital, more prana. So if you are there, suddenly your +prana begins to flow out of you. Why do you feel suffocated sometimes when you are in +a crowd? Because your prana is being sucked. While you are alone under the sky in the +morning, under the trees, suddenly you feel a vitality in you — the prana. Each person +needs a particular space. + + + +If that space is not given, your prana is sucked. + +Wilhelm Reich did many experiments, but he was thought to be a madman. Science has +its own superstitions, and science is a very orthodox thing. Science cannot feel yet that +there is anything more than air, but India has been experimenting with it for centuries. +You may have heard or you may have even seen someone going into SAMADHI, cosmic +consciousness — underground samadhi — for days together, with no air penetrating. One +man went into such underground samadhi in Egypt in 1880 for forty years. Those who +had buried him all died, because he was to come out of his samadhi in 1920, forty years +afterwards. In 1920 no one believed that they would find him alive, but he was found +alive. He lived afterwards for ten years more. He had become completely pale, but he +was alive. And there had been no possibility of air reaching to him. + +He was asked by medical doctors and others, "What is the secret of it?" He said, "We do +not know. We only know this, that prana can enter and flow anywhere." Air cannot +penetrate, but prana can penetrate. Once you know that you can suck prana directly, +without the container, then you can go into samadhi for centuries even. + +By being focused in the third eye, suddenly you can observe the very essence of breath — +not breath, but the very essence of breath, prana. And if you can observe the essence of +breath, prana, you are at the point from where the jump, the breakthrough happens. + + +The sutra says, LET FORM FILL WITH BREATH ESSENCE TO THE TOP OF THE +HEAD... And when you come to feel the essence of breathing, prana, just imagine that +your head is filled with it — just imagine. No need of any effort. I will explain to you how +imagination works. When you are focused at the third eye center, imagine, and the thing +happens — then and there. + +Now your imagination is just impotent; you go on imagining and nothing happens. But +sometimes, unknowingly, in ordinary life also things happen. You are imagining about +your friend and suddenly there is a knock on the door. You say it is a coincidence that the +friend has come. Sometimes your imagination works just like coincidence. But whenever +this happens, now try and remember and analyze the whole thing. Whenever it happens +that you feel your imagination has become actual, go inside and observe. Somewhere +your attention must have been near the third eye. Whenever this coincidence happens, it +is not a coincidence. It looks that way because you do not know the secret science. Your +mind must have moved unknowingly near the third eye center. If your attention is in the +third eye, just imagination is enough to create any phenomenon. + +This sutra says that when you are focused between the eyebrows and you can feel the +very essence of breathing, LET FORM FILL. Now imagine that this essence is filling +your whole head, particularly the top of the head, the SAHASRAR — the highest psychic +center. + +And the moment you imagine, it will be filled. THERE — at the top of the head — +SHOWER AS LIGHT. This prana essence is showering from the top of your head as +light. And it WILL begin to shower, and under the shower of light you will be refreshed, +reborn, completely new. That is what inner rebirth means. + +So two things: first, focused at the third eye your imagination becomes potent, powerful. +That is why so much insistence has been given on purity. Before doing these practices, be +pure. Purity is not a moral concept for tantra, purity is significant — because if you are +focused at the third eye and your mind is impure, your imagination can become + + + +dangerous: dangerous to you, dangerous to others. If you are thinking to murder +someone, if this idea is in the mind, just imagining may kill the man. That is why there is +so much insistence on being pure first. + +Pythagoras was told to go through fasting, through particular breathing — this breathing +— because here one is traveling in a very dangerous land. Because wherever there is +power there is danger, and if the mind is impure, whenever you get power your impure +thoughts will take hold of it immediately. + +You have imagined many times to kill but the imagination cannot work, fortunately. If it +works, if it is actualized immediately, then it will become dangerous — not only to others, +but to yourself also, because so many times you have thought to commit suicide. + +If the mind is focused at the third eye, just thinking of suicide will become suicide. You +will not have any time to change, immediately it will happen. + +You might have observed someone being hypnotized. When someone is hypnotized, the +hypnotist can say anything and immediately the hypnotized person follows. Howsoever +absurd the order, howsoever irrational or even impossible, the hypnotized person follows +it. What is happening? This fifth technique is at the base of all hypnotism. Whenever +someone is being hypnotized he is told to focus his eyes at a particular point — on some +light, some dot on the wall or anything, or on the eyes of the hypnotist. + +When you focus your eyes at any particular point, within three minutes your inner +attention begins to flow toward the third eye. And the moment your inner attention +begins to flow toward the third eye, your face begins to change. And the hypnotist knows +when your face begins to change. Suddenly your face loses all vitality. It becomes dead, +as if deeply asleep. The hypnotist knows immediately when your face has lost the luster, +the aliveness. It means that now attention is being sucked by the third eye center. Your +face has become dead; the whole energy is running toward the third eye center. + +Now the hypnotist immediately knows that anything said will happen. He says, "Now +you are falling into a deep sleep" — you will fall immediately. + +He says, "Now you are becoming unconscious" — you will become unconscious +immediately. Now anything can be done. If he says, "Now you have become Napoleon," +you will become. You will begin to behave like a Napoleon, you will begin to talk like +Napoleon. Your gestures will change. Your unconscious will take the order and will +create the actuality. If you are suffering from a disease, now it can be ordered that the +disease has disappeared and it will disappear. Or any new disease can be created. + +Just putting an ordinary stone from the street in your hand, the hypnotist can say, "This is +fire in your hand," and you will feel intense heat; your hand will get burned — not only in +the mind, but actually. Actually your skin will get burned. You will have a burning +sensation. What is happening? There is no fire, there is just an ordinary stone, cold. + +How? How does this burning happen? You are focused at the third eye center, your +imagination is being given suggestions by the hypnotist, and they are being actualized. If +the hypnotist says, "Now you are dead," you will die immediately. Your heart will stop. It +WILL stop. + +This happens because of the third eye. In the third eye, imagination and actualization are +not two things. Imagination is the fact. Imagine, and it is so. There is no gap between +dream and reality. There is NO gap between dream and reality! Dream, and it will +become real. + + + +That is why Shankara has said that this whole world is nothing but the dream of the +divine... the DREAM of the divine! This is because the divine is centered in the third eye +— always, eternally — so whatsoever the divine dreams becomes real. If you are also +centered in the third eye, whatsoever you dream will become real. + +Sariputta came to Buddha. He meditated deeply, then many things, many visions started +coming, as it happens with anyone who goes into deep meditation. He began to see +heavens, he began to see hells, he began to see angels, gods, demons. And they were +actual, so real that he came running to Buddha to tell him that such and such a vision had +come to him. But Buddha said, "It is nothing — just dreams. Just dreams!" + +But Sariputta said, "They are so real. How can I say that they are dreams? When I see a +flower in my vision it is more real than any flower in the world. The fragrance is there; I +can touch it. When I see you," he said to Buddha, "I do not see you as real. That flower is +more real than your being here just before me, so how can I differentiate between what is +real and what is dream?" Buddha said, "Now that you are centered in the third eye, dream +and reality are one. Whatsoever you are dreaming will be real, and vice versa also." + +For one who is centered in the third eye dreams will become real and the whole reality +will become just a dream, because when your dream can become real you know there is +no basic difference between dream and reality. + +So when Shankara says that this whole world is just MAYA, a dream of the divine, it is +not a theoretical proposition, it is not a philosophical statement. It is, rather, the inner +experience of one who is focused in the third eye. + +When you are focused in the third eye, just imagine that the essence of prana is +showering from the top of the head, just as if you are sitting under a tree and flowers are +showering, or you are just under the sky and suddenly a cloud begins to shower, or you +are just sitting in the morning and the sun rises and rays begin to shower. Imagine, and +immediately there is a shower — a shower of light falling down from the top of your +head. This shower recreates you, gives you a new birth. You are reborn. + +The sixth technique: + +WHEN IN WORLDLY ACTIVITY, KEEP ATTENTIVE BETWEEN THE TWO +BREATHS, AND SO PRACTICING, IN A FEW DAYS, BE BORN ANEW. + +WHEN IN WORLDLY ACTIVITY, KEEP ATTENTIVE BETWEEN THE TWO +BREATHS... Forget breaths — keep attentive in between. One breath has come: before it +returns, before it is exhaled out, there is the gap, the interval. One breath has gone out; +before it is taken in again, the gap. IN WORLDLY ACTIVITY KEEP ATTENTIVE +BETWEEN THE TWO BREATHS, AND SO PRACTICING, IN A FEW DAYS, BE +BORN ANEW. But this has to be done continuously. This sixth technique has to be done +continuously. That is why this is mentioned: WHEN IN WORLDLY ACTIVITY. + +.. Whatsoever you are doing, keep your attention in the gap between the two breaths. But +it must be practiced while in activity. + +We have discussed one technique that is just similar. Now there is only this difference, +that this has to be practiced while in worldly activity. Do not practice it in isolation. This +practice is to be done while you are doing something else. You are eating — go on eating +and be attentive of the gap. You are walking — go on walking and be attentive of the gap. +You are going to sleep — lie down, let sleep come, but you go on being attentive of the +gap. Why in activity? Because activity distracts the mind, activity calls for your attention + + + +again and again. Do not be distracted, be fixed at the gap. And do not stop activity, let the +activity continue. You will have two layers of existence — doing and being. + +We have two layers of existence: the world of doing and the world of being; the +circumference and the center. Go on working on the periphery, on the circumference; do +not stop it. But go on working attentively on the center also. What will happen? Your +activity will become an acting, as if you are playing a part. + +You are playing a part — for example, in a drama. You have become Ram or you have +become Christ. You go on acting as Christ or as Ram, and still you remain yourself. In +the center, you know who you are; on the periphery you go on acting as Ram, Christ or +anyone. + +You know you are not Ram — you are acting. You know who you are. Your attention is +centered in you; your activity continues on the circumference. + +If this method is practiced, your whole life will become a long drama. You will be an +actor playing roles, but constantly centered in the gap. If you forget the gap then you are +not playing roles, you have become the role. Then it is not a drama; you have mistaken it +as life. That is what we have done. Everyone thi nk s he is living life. It is not life, it is just +a role — a part which has been given to you by the society, by the circumstances, by the +culture, by the tradition, the country, the situation. You have been given a role and you +are playing it; you have become identified with it. To break that identification there is +this technique. + +Krishna has many names. Krishna is one of the greatest actors. He is constantly centered +in himself and playing — playing many roles, many games, but absolutely non serious. +Seriousness comes from identification. If you really become Ram in the drama then there +are bound to be problems. Those problems will come out of your seriousness. When Sita +is stolen you may get a heart attack, and the whole play will have to be stopped. If you +really become Ram a heart attack is certain... even heart failure. + +But you are just an actor. Sita is stolen, but nothing is stolen. You will go back to your +home and you will sleep peacefully. + +Not even in a dream will you feel that Sita is stolen. When really Sita was stolen, Ram +himself was weeping, crying and asking the trees, "Where has my Sita gone? Who has +taken her?" But this is the point to understand. If Ram is really weeping and asking the +trees, he has become identified. He is no more Ram; he is no more a divine person. + +This is the point to remember, that for Ram his real life also was just a part. You have +seen other actors playing Ram, but Ram himself was just playing a part — on a greater +stage, of course. + +India has a very beautiful story about it. I think that the story is unique; nowhere else in +any part of the world does such a thing exist. It is said that Valmiki wrote the +RAMA YANA before Ram was bom, and then Ram had to follow. So really, the first act +of Ram was also just a drama. The story was written before Ram was bom and then Ram +had to follow, so what can he do? When a man like Valmiki writes the story, Ram has to +follow. So everything was fixed in a way. Sita was to be stolen and the war had to be +fought. + +If you can understand this, then you can understand the theory of destiny, BHAGYA — +fate. It has a very deep meaning. And the meaning is, if you take it that everything is +fixed for you, your life becomes a drama. If you are playing the role of Ram in the drama +you cannot change it, everything is fixed, even your dialogue. + + + +If you say something to Sita it is just repeating something that is fixed. You cannot +change it if life is taken as fixed. + +For example, you are going to die on a particular day — it is fixed. When you will be +dying you will be weeping, but it is fixed. And such and such persons will be around you +— it is fixed. If everything is fixed, everything becomes a drama. If everything is fixed, it +means you are just to enact it. You are not asked to live it, you are just asked to enact it. +This technique, the sixth technique, is just to make yourself a psychodrama — just a play. +You are focused in the gap between two breaths and life moves on, on the periphery. If +your attention is at the center, then your attention is not really on the periphery — that is +just "sub-attention"; it just happens somewhere near your attention. You can feel it, you +can know it, but it is not significant. It is as if it is not happening to you. I will repeat this: +if you practice this sixth technique, your whole life will be as if it is not happening to +you, as if it is happening to someone else. + +The seventh technique: WITH INTANGIBLE BREATH IN CENTER OF FOREHEAD, +AS THIS REACHES HEART AT THE MOMENT OF SLEEP, HAVE DIRECTION +OVER DREAMS AND OVER DEATH ITSELF. More and more you are entering deeper +layers. WITH INTANGIBLE BREATH IN CENTER OF FOREHEAD... If you have +known the third eye then you know the intangible breath, the invisible prana in the center +of the forehead, and then you know the showering — the energy, the light showers. + +AS THIS REACHES HEART... When the shower will reach your heart... AT THE +MOMENT OF SLEEP, HAVE DIRECTION OVER DREAMS AND OVER DEATH +ITSELF. + +Take this technique in three parts. One, you must be able to feel the prana in breath — the +intangible part of it, the invisible part of it, the immaterial part of it. It comes if you are +attentive between the two eyebrows; then it comes easily. If you are attentive in the gap, +then too it comes, but a little less easily. If you are aware of the center at your navel +where breath comes and touches and goes out, it also comes, but with less ease. The +easiest way to know the invisible part of breath is to be centered at the third eye. But +wherever you are centered, it comes, you begin to feel the prana flowing in. + +If you can feel the prana flowing in you, you can know when you are going to die. Six +months before the day of your death you begin to know, if you can feel the invisible part +of breath. Why do so many saints declare the day of their death? It is easy, because if you +can see the content of the breath, the prana flowing into you, the moment the process +reverses you can feel it. Before you die, six months before you die, the process reverses: +prana begins to flow out of you. Then the breath is not taking it in. Rather, on the +contrary, the breath is taking it out — the same breath. + +You cannot feel it because you do not know the invisible part — you know only the +visible, you know only the vehicle. + +The vehicle will be the same. Now the breath is carrying prana in, leaving it there; then +the vehicle goes back empty. Then again it is filled with the prana and it comes in. So the +ingoing breath and the outgoing breath are not the same, remember. The ingoing breath +and the outgoing breath are the same as vehicles, but the incoming breath is filled with +prana and the outgoing breath is empty. You have taken in the prana and the breath has +become empty. + +The reverse happens when you are nearing death. The incoming breath comes prana-less, + + + +empty, because your body cannot suck prana from the cosmos. You are going to die; +there is no need for it. The whole process has reversed. And when the breath goes out, it +takes your prana out. One who has been able to see the invisible can know his day of +death immediately. Six months before, the process reverses. + +This sutra is very, very significant: WITH INTANGIBLE BREATH IN CENTER OF +FOREHEAD, AS THIS REACHES HEART AT THE MOMENT OF SLEEP, HAVE +DIRECTION OVER DREAMS AND OVER DEATH ITSELF. While you are falling +into sleep this technique has to be practiced — then only, not at any other time. While you +are falling asleep, only then; that is the right moment to practice this technique. You are +falling asleep. By and by, by and by, sleep is overtaking you. Within moments, your +consciousness will dissolve; you will not be aware. + +Before that moment comes, become aware — aware of the breath and the invisible part +prana, and feel it coming to the heart. + +Go on feeling that it is coming to the heart. The prana enters from your heart into the +body. Go on feeling that the prana is coming into the heart, and let sleep come while you +are continuously feeling it. You go on feeling, and let sleep come and drown you. + +If this happens — that you are feeling invisible breath coming into the heart and sleep +overtakes you — you will be aware in dreams. You will know that you are dreaming. +Ordinarily we do not know that we are dreaming. While you dream you think that this is +reality. That too happens because of the third eye. Have you seen anyone asleep? His +eyes move upwards and become focused in the third eye. If you have not seen, then see. +Your child is sleeping... just open his eyes and see where his eyes are. His pupils have +gone up and they are focused in the third eye. I say look at children, do not look at +grown-ups — they are not believable because their sleep is not deep. They will just be +thinking that they are asleep. Look at children, their eyes move up. They become focused +in the third eye. Because of this focusing in the third eye you take your dreams as real, +you cannot feel they are dreams — they are real. You will know when you get up in the +morning. Then you will know that "I was dreaming." + +But this is the later, retrospective realization. You cannot realize in the dream that you +are dreaming. If you realize it, then there are two layers: dream is there but you are +awake, you are aware. For one who becomes aware in dreams, this sutra is wonderful. It +says, HAVE DIRECTION OVER DREAMS AND OVER DEATH ITSELF. + +If you can become aware of dreams, you can do two things. You can create dreams — +one. Ordinarily you cannot create dreams. How impotent man is! You cannot even create +dreams. If you want to dream a particular thing you cannot dream it; it is not in your +hands. How powerless man is! Even dreams cannot be created. You are just a victim of +dreams, not the creator. A dream happens to you; you cannot do anything. Neither can +you stop it nor can you create it. + +But if you move into sleep remembering the heart being filled with prana, continuously +being touched by prana with every breath, you will become a master of your dreams — +and this is a rare mastery. Then you can dream whatsoever dreams you like. Just note +while you are falling asleep that "I want to dream this dream," and that dream will come +to you. Just say, while falling asleep, "I do not want to dream that dream," and that dream +cannot enter your mind. + +But what is the use of becoming the master of your dreaming? Isn't it useless? No, it is +not useless. Once you become master of your dreams you will never dream — it is absurd. + + + +When you are master of your dreams, dreaming stops; there is no need for it. And when +dreaming stops, your sleep has a different quality altogether, and the quality is the same +as of death. + +Death is deep sleep. If your sleep can become as deep as death, that means there will be +no dreaming. Dreaming creates superficiality in sleep. You move on the surface because +of the dreams; because of hanging on to the dreams, you move on the surface. When +there is no dreaming you just drop into the sea, its depth is reached. + +Death is the same. That is why people in India have always been saying that sleep is a +short duration of death, and death is a long sleep — qualitatively they are the same. Sleep +is a day-to-day death. Death is a life-to-life phenomenon, a life-to-life sleep. Every day +you are tired. You fall into sleep and you regain your vitality, your aliveness in the +morning; you are reborn. After a life of seventy or eighty years you are tired completely. +Now such short durations of death won’t do; you need a great death. After that great +death or great sleep, you are reborn with a totally new body. + +Once you can know dreamless sleep and can be aware in it, then there will be no fear of +death. No one has ever died, no one can die — that is the only impossibility. + +Just a day before I was telling you that death is the only certainty, and now I say to you +that death is impossible. + +No one has ever died and no one can die — that is the only impossibility — because the +universe is life. You are again and again reborn, but the sleep is so deep that you forget +your old identity. Your mind is washed clean of the memories. + +Think of it in this way. Today you are going to sleep: it is just as if there were some +mechanism — and soon we will have this — like that which can erase on a tape recorder, +which can wipe a tape clean so that whatsoever was recorded is no more there. The same +is possible with memory, because memory is really just a deep recording. Sooner or later +we will have a mechanism which can be put on the head and it will clean your mind +completely. In the morning you will no longer be the same person because you won’t be +able to remember who it was who went to sleep. Then your sleep will look like death. +There will be a discontinuity; you won’t be able to remember who went to sleep. This is +happening naturally. When you die and you are reborn, you cannot remember who died. +You start again. + +With this technique, first you will become the master of your dreams — that is, dreaming +will cease. Or if you want to dream you will be able to dream, but dreaming will become +voluntary. It will not be non-voluntary, it will not be forced upon you; you will not be a +victim. Then the quality of your sleep will become just like that of death. Then you will +know that death is sleep. + + +That is why this sutra says: HAVE DIRECTION OVER DREAMS AND OVER DEATH +ITSELF, you will know that death is just a long sleep — and helpful and beautiful +because it gives you new life; it gives you everything anew. Death ceases to be... with +cessation of dreaming, death ceases to be. + +There is another meaning to gaining power over death, direction over death. If you can +come to feel that death is just a sleep, you will be able to direct it. If you can direct your +dreams, you can direct your death also. You can choose where you are to be born again, +to whom, when, in what form; you will become master of your birth also. + +Buddha died... I am not referring to his last life, but to his last-but-one life, before he + + + +became Buddha. Before dying he said, "I will be bom to such and such parents; such will +be my mother, such will be my father. But my mother will die immediately... when I am +bom my mother will die immediately. Before I am born my mother will have certain +dreams." Not only do you gain power from your dreams, you gain power from others' +dreams also. So Buddha, as an example, said, "Certain dreams will be there. When I will +be in the womb, my mother will have certain dreams. So whenever any woman has these +dreams in this sequence, know well I am going to be born to her." + +And it happened. Buddha's mother dreamed the same sequence. The sequence was +kn own all over India, because it was no ordinary statement. + +It was known to everyone, particularly those who were interested in religion and the +deeper things of life and the esoteric ways of life. It was known, so the dreams were +interpreted. Freud was not the first interpreter — and, of course, not the deepest. Only in +the West was he the first. + +So Buddha’s father immediately called dream interpreters, the Freuds and Jungs of those +days, and he asked, "What does this sequence mean? I am afraid. These dreams are rare, +and they go on repeating in the same sequence. There are one, two, three, four, five, six +dreams continuously being repeated. There are the same dreams, as if one is seeing the +same film again and again. What is happening?" + +So they told him, "You are going to be the father of a great soul — one who is going to be +a buddha. But then your wife is going to be in danger, because whenever this buddha is +bom it is difficult for the mother to survive." + +The father asked, "Why?" The interpreters said, "We cannot say why, but this soul who is +going to be born has made a statement that when he will be born again, the mother will +die immediately." + +Later on Buddha was asked, "Why did your mother die immediately?" He said, "Giving +birth to a buddha is such a big event that everything else becomes futile afterwards. So +the mother cannot exist. She will have to be bom again to start anew. It is such a climax +giving birth to a buddha, it is such a peak, that the mother cannot exist beyond it." + + +So the mother died. And Buddha had said in his previous life that he would be bom while +his mother was standing under a palm tree — and it happened. The mother was standing +under a palm tree — standing while Buddha was born. And he had said, "I will be bom +while my mother is standing under a palm tree, and I will take seven steps. Immediately, + +I will walk. These are the signs I give to you," he said, "so that you will know that a +buddha is born." And he carried out everything. + +And this is not only so about Buddha. It is so about Jesus, it is so about Mahavir, it is so +about many others. Every Jain TIRTH ANKARA has predicted in his previous life how +he is going to be born. And they have given particular dream sequences — that such and +such will be the symbols — and they have told how it will happen. + +You can direct. Once you can direct your dreams you can direct everything, because +dream is the very stuff of this world. This life is made out of the stuff of dreams. Once +you can direct your dreams you can direct everything. This sutra says, OVER DEATH +ITSELF. Then one can give a certain birth, a certain life to oneself. + +We are just victims. We do not know why we are born, why we die. Who directs us — +and why? There seems to be no reason. It all seems just a chaos, just accidental. It is +because we are not masters. Once we are masters it is not like this. + + + +The eighth technique: WITH UTMOST DEVOTION, CENTER ON THE TWO +JUNCTIONS OF BREATH AND KNOW THE KNOWER. There is a slight difference +in the techniques — slight modifications. But though the differences are slight in the +techniques, for you they may be great. A single word makes a great difference. WITH +UTMOST DEVOTION, CENTER ON THE TWO JUNCTIONS OF BREATH. The +incoming breath has one junction where it turns, the outgoing breath has another junction +where it turns. With these two turnings — and we have discussed these turnings — a slight +difference is made: that is, slight in the technique, but for the seeker it may be great. Only +one condition is added — WITH UTMOST DEVOTION — and the whole technique +becomes different. + +In the first form of it there was no question of devotion, just a scientific technique. You +do it, and it works. But there are persons who cannot do such dry, scientific tec'niques. +Those who are heart-oriented, those who belong to the world of devotion, for them a +slight difference has been made: WITH UTMOST DEVOTION, CENTER ON THE +TWO JUNCTIONS OF BREATH AND KNOW THE KNOWER. + +If you are not of the scientific bent, of the scientific attitude, if you are not a scientific +mind, then try this: WITH UTMOST DEVOTION - with faith, love, trust - CENTER +ON THE TWO JUNCTIONS OF BREATH AND KNOW THE KNOWER. How to do +this? How? You can have devotion about someone: about Krishna, about Christ you can +have devotion. + +But how can you have devotion about yourself, about this junction of breathing? The +phenomenon seems absolutely non-devotional. But that depends.... + +Tantra says that the body is the temple. Your body is the temple of the divine, the abode +of the divine, so do not treat your body as an object. It is sacred, it is holy. And while you +are taking a breath in, it is not only you who is taking the breath, it is the divine within +you. You are eating, you are moving or walking... look at it in this way: it is not you, but +the divine moving in you. Then the whole thing becomes absolutely devotional. + +It is said about many saints that they love their bodies. They treat their bodies as if their +bodies belong to their beloveds. You can treat your body in this way or you can treat it +just like a mechanism — that again is an attitude. You can treat it with guilt, sin; you can +treat it as something dirty; you can treat it as something miraculous, as a miracle; you can +treat it as the abode of the divine. It depends on you. If you can treat your body as a +temple, then this technique will be helpful — WITH UTMOST DEVOTION... + +Try it. While you are eating, try it. Do not think that YOU are eating. Think that it is the +divine in you who is eating, and look at the change. You are eating the same thing, you +are the same, but immediately everything becomes different. You are giving the food to +the divine. + +You are taking a bath — a very ordinary, trivial thing — but change the attitude: feel that +you are giving a bath to the divine in you. Then this technique will be easy: WITH +UTMOST DEVOTION, CENTER ON THE TWO JUNCTIONS OF BREATH AND +KNOW THE KNOWER. + + +The ninth technique: LIE DOWN AS DEAD. ENRAGED IN WRATH, STAY SO. OR +STARE WITHOUT MOVING AN EYELASH. OR SUCK SOMETHING AND + + + +BECOME THE SUCKING. + +LIE DOWN AS DEAD. Try it: suddenly you have gone dead. Leave the body! Do not +move it, because you are dead. Just imagine that you are dead. You cannot move the +body, you cannot move the eyes, you cannot cry, you cannot scream, you cannot do +anything, you are just dead. And then feel how it feels. But do not deceive. You can +deceive — you can slightly move the body. Do not move. If some mosquito is there, then +treat the body as if it is dead. It is one of the most used techniques. + +Raman Maharshi attained his enlightenment through this technique, but it was not a +technique used by him in his life. In his life it suddenly happened, spontaneously. But he +must have persisted with this in some past life, because nothing happens spontaneously. +Everything has a causal link, a causality. Suddenly one night Raman felt — he was just +young, fourteen or fifteen at the time — that he was going to die. And it was so certain in +his mind that death had taken over. He couldn't move his body, he felt as if he was +paralyzed. + +Then he felt a sudden choking, and he knew that now the heart was going to stop. He +could not even cry and say to another, "I am going to die." + +Sometimes it happens in some nightmare — you cannot cry, you cannot move. Even when +you become awake for a few moments you cannot do anything. That happened. He had +absolute power over his consciousness, but no power over his body. He knew he was +there, that he was present, conscious, alert, but he felt he was going to die. And the +knowledge became so certain that there was no other possibility, so he just gave up. He +closed his eyes and remained there, just waiting to die; he waited there just to die. + +By and by the body became stiff. The body died, but then it became a problem. He knew +that the body had died, but he was there and he knew it. He knew that he was alive and +that the body had died. Then he came back. In the morning the body became okay but the +same man never returned — because he had known death. He had known a different +realm, a different dimension of consciousness. + +He escaped from the house. That death experience changed him completely. He became +one of the very few enlightened persons of this age. + +This is the technique. This happened spontaneously to Raman, but it is not going to +happen spontaneously to you. But try it. In some life it may become spontaneous. It may +happen while you are trying it. + +And if it is not going to happen, the effort is never wasted. It is in you; it remains in you +as a seed. Sometime, when the time is ripe and the rains will fall, it will sprout. + +Every spontaneity is just like this. The seed was sown some time ago, but the time was +not ripe; there were no rains. In another life the time becomes ripe. You are more mature, +more experienced, more frustrated with the world — then suddenly, in a certain situation, +there are rains and the seed explodes. + +LIE DOWN AS DEAD. ENRAGED IN WRATH, STAY SO. Of course, while you are +dying it will not be a happy moment. It is not going to be so blissful while you are feeling +that you are dead. Fear will take you, anger may come in the mind, or frustration, +sadness, sorrow, anguish... anything. It will differ from individual to individual. + +The sutra says: ENRAGED IN WRATH, STAY SO. If you feel enraged, stay so. If you +feel sad, stay so. If you feel anxiety, fear, stay so. You are dead and you cannot do +anything, so stay so. Whatsoever is in the mind, the body is dead and you cannot do +anything, so stay. + + + +That staying is beautiful. If you can stay for a few minutes, suddenly you will feel that +everything has changed. But we start moving. If there is some emotion in the mind, the +body begins to move. That is why we call it "emotion" — it creates motion in the body. If +you are angry, suddenly your body begins to move. + +If you are sad, your body begins to move. That is why it is called emotion, because it +creates motion in the body. Feel dead and do not allow emotions to move your body. Let +them be there, but you STAY SO — fixed, dead. Whatsoever is there... no movement. +Stay! No movement. + +OR STARE WITHOUT MOVING AN EYELASH. This OR STARE WITHOUT +MOVING AN EYELASH was the method of Meher Baba. For years together he was +staring just at the ceiling of his room. For years together he was just lying dead on the +floor, staring at the ceiling without moving an eyelash, without moving his eyes. He +would lie down for hours together, just staring, not doing anything. Staring with the eyes +is good, because you become fixed again in the third eye. And once you are fixed in the +third eye, even if you want to move the eyelids you cannot; they become fixed. + +Meher Baba attained through this staring, and you say, "How with these small +exercises...?" But for three years he was staring at the ceiling not doing anything. Three +years is a long time. Do it for three minutes and you will feel as if you have been lying +there for three years. Three minutes will become very, very long. It will look as if time is +not passing and as if the clock has stopped. + +Meher Baba stared and stared and stared. By and by thoughts ceased, movement ceased, +and he became just a consciousness, he became just a staring. + +Then he remained silent for his whole life. He became so silent inside by this staring that +it became impossible for him to formulate words again. + +Meher Baba was in America. There was one man who could read others’ thoughts, who +could do mind readings, and he was really one of the rarest mind readers. He would close +his eyes, sit before you, and within a few minutes he would become attuned with you and +he would begin to write what you are thinking. Thousands and thousands of times he was +examined, and he was always right, always correct. So someone brought him to Meher +Baba. He sat there, and this was the only failure of his life — the only failure. But then +again we cannot say it was a failure. He tried and tried, and he began to perspire, but he +couldn’t catch a single word. + +Pen in his hand, he remained there and said, "What type of man is this? I cannot read +because there is nothing to read. This man is absolutely vacant. I even forget that +someone is sitting there. After closing my eyes, I have to open them again and look to see +whether that man is there or whether he has escaped. So it is difficult to concentrate, +because the moment I close my eyes I feel I am being deceived — as if that man has +escaped and there is no one before me. I have to open my eyes again, and I find that this +man is there. And he is not thinking at all." That staring, that constant staring had stopped +his mind completely. + + +OR STARE WITHOUT MOVING AN EYELASH. OR SUCK SOMETHING AND +BECOME THE SUCKING. These are slight modifications. Anything will do... you are +dead — it is enough. + +ENRAGED IN WRATH, STAY SO. Even this part can become one technique. You are + + + +in anger: lie down, remain in the anger. Do not move from it, do not do anything, just +remain still. + +Krishnamurti goes on talking about this. His whole technique depends on this single +thing: ENRAGED IN WRATH, STAY SO. If you are angry then be angry, and remain +angry. Do not move. If you can stay so, anger will go and you will come out a different +man. If you are in anxiety, do not do anything. Remain there, stay there. The anxiety will +go; you will come out a different man. And once you have looked at anxiety without +being moved by it, you will be the master. + +OR STARE WITHOUT MOVING AN EYELASH. OR SUCK SOMETHING AND +BECOME THE SUCKING. This last one is physical and easy to do, because sucking is +the first thing a child has to do. Sucking is the first act of life. When the child is born, he +begins to cry. You may not have tried to penetrate into why there is this crying. He is not +really crying — it appears to us that he is crying — he is just sucking air. And if the child +cannot cry, within a few minutes he will be dead, because crying is the first effort to suck +air. The child was not breathing while he was in the womb. + +He was alive without breathing. He was doing the same which yogis are doing +underground. He was just getting prana without breathing — pure prana from the mother. +That is why the love between the child and the mother is an altogether different thing +from other loves, because the purest prana — energy — joins both. Now this can never +happen again. There was a subtle pranic relationship. The mother was giving her prana to +the child, and the child was not breathing at all. When he is born, he is thrown out of the +mother into an unknown world. Now the prana, the energy, will not reach him so easily. +He has to breathe himself. + +The first cry is an effort to suck, and then he will suck the milk from the mother's breast. +These are the first basic acts which you have done. Whatsoever YOU have done comes +later — these are the first life acts. They can be practiced also. This sutra says: OR SUCK +SOMETHING AND BECOME THE SUCKING. Suck something - just suck the air, but +forget the air and become the sucking. What does this mean? You are sucking something; +you are the sucker, not the sucking. You are standing behind and sucking. + +This sutra says, do not stand behind, move in the act and become the sucking. Try +anything that will work. You are running — become the running, do not be the runner. +Become the running and forget the runner. Feel that there is no runner inside, just the +process of running. + +You are the process, a river-like process running. Nobody is there inside. It is quiet inside +and there is only a process. + +Sucking is good, but you will feel that it is very difficult because we have forgotten it +completely — but not really completely, however, because we go on substituting for it. +The mother's breast is substituted by a cigarette; you go on sucking it. It is nothing but +the nipple, the mother's breast and the nipple. And when the warm smoke flows in, it is +just like wann milk. + +So those who were not really allowed to suck the mother's breast as much as they wanted +will smoke later on. This is a substitute, but the substitute will do. While you are smoking +a cigarette become the sucking. Forget the cigarette, forget the smoker: become the +smoking. + +There is the object you are sucking, there is the subject who is sucking, and the process in +between of sucking. Become the sucking, become the process. Try it. You will have to + + + +try it with many things; then you will find out what is right for you. + +You are drinking water, the cold water is going in — become the drinking. Do not drink +the water. Forget the water, forget yourself and your thirst, just become the drinking — +the very process. Become the coolness, the touch, the entry, and the sucking that has to +be given to the process. + +Why not? What will happen? If you become the sucking, what will happen? If you can +become the sucking, immediately you will become innocent, like a first-day, newly-born +child — because that is the first process. + +You will be regressed in a way. But the hankering is there. The very being of man +hankers after sucking. He tries many things, but nothing helps because the point is +missed. Unless you become the sucking, nothing will help. So try it. + +I gave this method to one man. He had tried many things; he had tried many, many +methods. Then he came to me, so I asked him, "If I give you only one thing to choose in +the whole world, what are you going to choose?" And I told him immediately to close his +eyes and tell me, and not think about it. He became afraid, hesitant, so I told him, "Do not +be afraid, do not be hesitant. Be frank and tell me." + +He said, "This is absurd, but a breast appears before me." + +And then he began to feel guilty, so I said, "Do not feel guilty. Nothing is wrong in a +breast; it is one of the most beautiful things, so why be guilty?" + +But he said, "This has always been an obsession with me." And he said to me, "Please tell +me first, then you can proceed with your method and the technique: first tell me why I am +so much interested in the breasts of women? Whenever I look at a woman, the first thing +I see is the breast. The whole body is secondary." + +And it is not so only with him, it is so with everyone — with almost everyone. And it is +natural, because the breast of the mother was the first acquaintance with the universe. It +is basic. + +The first contact with the universe was the mother's breast. That is why breasts are so +appealing. They look beautiful; they attract, they have a magnetic force. That magnetic +force comes from your unconscious. That was the first thing with which you came in +contact, and the contact was lovely, it felt beautiful. It gives you food, instant vitality, +love, everything. The contact was soft, receptive, inviting. It has remained so in the mind +of man. + +So I told that man, "Now I will give you the method." And this was the method I gave +him, to suck something and become the sucking. I told him, "Just close your eyes. +Imagine your mother's breasts or anybody's breasts that you like. Imagine, and start +sucking as if there is a real breast. Start sucking." He started sucking. Within three days +he was sucking so fast, so madly, he became so much enchanted by it. He told me, "It has +become a problem — I want to suck the whole day. And it is so beautiful, and such deep +silence is created by it." + +Within three months the sucking became a very, very silent gesture. The lips stopped, +you couldn’t even have judged that he was doing something. But inner sucking had +started. He was sucking the whole day. It became a mantra, a JAPA — a mantra +repetition. + +After three months he came to me and said, "Something strange is happening to me. +Something sweet is falling from my head onto my tongue continuously. + + + +And it is so sweet and so energy filling that I do not need any food, there is no hunger +left. Eating has become just a formality. I take something in order not to create any +problems in the family. But something is continuously coming to me. It is so sweet, life- +giving." + +I told him to continue. Three months more, and one day he came just mad, dancing to me, +and he said, "Sucking has disappeared, but I am a different man. I am no more the same +man who had come to you. Some door has opened within me. Something has broken and +there is no desire left. Now I do not want anything — not even God, not even MOKSHA +— liberation. I do not want anything. Now everything is okay as it is. I accept it and I am +blissful." + +Try this. Just suck something and become the sucking. It may be helpful to many because +it is so basic. + +This much for today. + +THE END. + + + +Chapter 6: Devices to transcend dreaming + + +One friend has asked. + +Question 1 + +WILL YOU PLEASE EXPLAIN TO US WHAT ARE SOME OF THE OTHER +FACTORS WHICH CAN MAKE ONE CONSCIOUS WHILE DREAMING? + +This is a significant question for all those who are interested in meditation, because +meditation is really a transcending of the process of dreaming. You are constantly +dreaming — not only in the night, not only while you are asleep; you are dreaming the +whole day. This is the first point to be understood. While you are awake you are still +dreaming. + +Just close your eyes at any time of the day. Relax the body and you will feel that the +dreaming is there. It never disappears, it is only suppressed by our daily activities. It is +like the stars in the day. In the night you see the stars. In the day you cannot see them, but +they are there always. They are simply suppressed by the sunlight. + +If you go into a deep well, then you can see the stars in the sky even in the day. A certain +darkness is needed to see the stars. So go into a deep well and look from the bottom, and +you will be able to see the stars in the day also. The stars are there. It is not that in the +night they are there and in the day they are not, they are always there. In the night you +can see them easily. In the day you cannot see them because the sunlight becomes a +barrier. + +The same is true with dreaming. It is not that you dream while you are asleep. + +In sleep you can feel dreams easily because the activity of the day is no more there; thus +that inner activity can be seen and felt. When you get up in the morning, the dreaming +continues inside while you start acting on the outside. + +This process of activity, of daily activity, simply suppresses the dreaming. The dreaming +is there. Close your eyes, relax in an armchair, and suddenly you can feel: the stars are +there; they have not gone anywhere. The dreams are there always. There is a continuous +activity. + +The second point. If the dreaming continues, you cannot be said to be really awake. In +the night you are more asleep, in the day you are less asleep. The difference is relative, +because if the dreaming is there you cannot be said to be really awake. Dreaming creates +a film over the consciousness. This film becomes like smoke — you are surrounded by it. +You cannot be really awake while you are dreaming, whether in the day or in the night. + +So the second thing: you can only be said to be awake when there is no dreaming at all. +We call Buddha the awakened one. What is this awakening? This awakening is really the +cessation of inner dreaming. There is no dream inside. You move there, but there is no +dream. It is as if there were no star in the sky; it has become pure space. When there is no +dreaming, you become pure space. + +This purity, this innocence, this non-dreaming consciousness, is what is known as +enlightenment — the awakening. + +For centuries spirituality all over the world, East or West, has said that man is asleep. +Jesus says this, Buddha says this, the Upanishads talk about this: man is asleep. So while +you are asleep in the night you are just relatively more asleep; in the day you are less +asleep. But spirituality says that man is asleep. This has to be understood. + + + +What is meant by this? Gurdjieff, in this century, emphasized this fact that man is asleep. +"In fact," he said, "man is a sort of sleep. Everyone is deeply asleep." + +What is the reason for saying that? You cannot know, you cannot remember who you are. +Do you know who you are? If you meet a person in the street and you ask him who he is +and he cannot reply, what will you think? You will think that he is either mad, +intoxicated, or just asleep. If he cannot answer who he is, what are you going to think +about him? On the spiritual path everyone is like that. You cannot answer who you are. +This is the first meaning when Gurdjieff or Jesus or anyone says that man is asleep: you +are not conscious about yourself. You do not know yourself; you have never met +yourself. You know many things in the objective world, but you do not know the subject. +Your state of mind is as if you had gone to see a film. On the screen the film is running, +and you have become so absorbed in it that the only thing you know is the film, the story, +whatsoever is appearing on the screen. + +Then if someone asks you who you are, you cannot say anything. + +Dreaming is just the film — JUST the film! It is the mind reflecting the world. In the +mirror of the mind the world is reflected; that is what dreaming is. And you are so deeply +involved in it, so much identified with it, that you have completely forgotten who you +are. This is what being asleep means: the dreamer is lost in the dreaming. You see +everything except yourself; you feel everything except yourself; you know everything +except yourself. This self-ignorance is the sleep. Unless dreaming ceases completely, you +cannot awaken unto yourself. + +You might have felt it sometimes while looking at a film for three hours, and suddenly +the film stops and you come back to yourself. You remember that three hours have +passed, you remember that it was just a film. You feel your tears... you have been +weeping because the film was a tragedy to you, or you were laughing, or you were doing +something else, and now you laugh about yourself. What nonsense you were doing! It +was just a film, just a story. There was nothing on the screen — just a play of light and +shadow, just an electrical play. Now you laugh: you have come back to yourself. But +where were you for these three hours? + +You were not at your center. You had moved completely to the periphery. There, where +the film was moving, you had gone. You were not at your center; you were not with +yourself. + +You were somewhere else. + +This happens in dreaming; this is what our life is. The film is only for three hours, but +this dreaming is running for lives and lives and lives. Even if suddenly the dreaming +stops you will not be able to recognize who you are. Suddenly you will feel very faint, +even afraid. You will try to move again into the film because that is known. You are +acquainted with it, you are well adjusted to it. + +For when the stopping of the dreaming happens there is a path, particularly in Zen, which +is known as the path of sudden enlightenment. There are techniques in these one hundred +and twelve methods, there are many techniques which can give you sudden awakening. +But it can be too much, and you may not be capable of bearing it. You may just explode. +You may die even, because you have lived with dreaming so long that you have no +memory of who you are if there is no dreaming. + +If this whole world should suddenly disappear and you alone are left, it would be such a +great shock that you would die. The same would happen if suddenly all dreaming + + + +disappeared from the consciousness. Your world will disappear, because your world was +your dreaming. + +We are not really in the world. Rather, "the world" consists not of outside things to us, +but of our dreams. So everyone lives in his own dream world. + +Remember, it is not one world that we go on talking about. + +Geographically it is, but psychologically there are as many worlds as there are minds. +Each mind is a world of its own. And if your dreaming disappears, your world +disappears. Without dreams it is difficult for you to live. That is why sudden methods are +not used generally, only gradual methods are used. + +It is good to note this: gradual methods are used not because there is any need of gradual +processes. You can suddenly jump into realization this very moment. There is no barrier; +there has never been any barrier. You are already that realization, you can jump this very +moment. But that may prove dangerous, fatal. You may not be capable of bearing it. It is +going to be too much for you. + +You are attuned only to false dreams. Reality you cannot face; you cannot encounter it. +You are a hothouse plant — you live in your dreams. They help you in many ways. They +are not just dreams, for you they are the reality. + +Gradual methods are used not because realization needs time. Realization needs no time! +Realization needs no time at all. Realization is not something to be attained in the future, +but with gradual methods you will attain it in the future. So what are the gradual methods +doing? They are not really helping you to "realize realization," they are helping you to +bear it. They are making you capable, strong, so that when the happening happens you +can bear it. + + +There are seven methods through which immediately you can force your way into +enlightenment. But you will not be capable of bearing it. You may go blind — too much +of light. Or you may suddenly die — too much of bliss. + +This dreaming, this deep sleep we are in, how can it be transcended? This question is +meaningful in transcending it: WILL YOU PLEASE EXPLAIN TO US WHAT ARE +SOME OF THE OTHER FACTORS WHICH CAN MAKE ONE CONSCIOUS WHILE +DREAMING? I will talk about two methods more. One we discussed yesterday. Today, +two more that are even easier. + +One is to start acting, behaving as if the whole world is just a dream. Whatsoever you are +doing, remember this is a dream. While eating, remember this is a dream. While walking, +remember this is a dream. Let your mind continuously remember while you are awake +that everything is a dream. This is the reason for calling the world MAYA, illusion, +dream. This is not a philosophical argument. + +Unfortunately, when Shankara was translated into English, German and French, into +Western languages, he was understood to be just a philosopher. That has created much +misunderstanding. In the West there are philosophers — for example, Berkeley — who say +that the world is just a dream, a projection of the mind. But this is a philosophical theory. +Berkeley proposes it as an hypothesis. + +When Shankara says that the world is a dream it is not philosophical, not a theory. + + +Shankara proposes it as a help, as a support for a particular meditation. And this is the +meditation: if you want to remember while dreaming that this is a dream, you will have to + + + +start while you are awake. Normally, while you are dreaming you cannot remember that +this is a dream; you think that this is a reality. + +Why do you think that this is a reality? Because the whole day you are thinking +everything is a reality. That has become the attitude, a fixed attitude. While awake you +were taking a bath — it was real. While awake you were eating — it was real. While +awake you were talking with a friend — it was real. For the whole day, the whole life, +whatsoever you are thinking, your attitude is that this is real. This becomes fixed. This +becomes a fixed attitude in the mind. + +So while you are dreaming in the night, the same attitude goes on working, that this is +real. So let us first analyze. There must be some similarity between dreaming and reality; +otherwise this attitude would be somewhat difficult. + +I am seeing you. Then I close my eyes and I go into a dream, and I see you in my dream. +In both seeings there is no difference. While I am actually seeing you, what am I doing? +Your picture is reflected in my eyes. I am not seeing YOU. Your picture is mirrored in +my eyes, and then that picture is transformed through mysterious processes — and science +is still not in a position to say how. + +That picture is transfonned chemically and carried somewhere inside the head, but +science is still not able to say where — where exactly this thing happens. It is not +happening in the eyes; the eyes are just windows. I am not seeing you with the eyes, I am +seeing you THROUGH the eyes. + +In the eyes you are reflected. You may be just a picture; you may be a reality, you may be +a dream. Remember, dreams are three-dimensional. I can recognize a picture because a +picture is two-dimensional. Dreams are three-dimensional, so they look exactly like you. +And the eyes cannot say whether whatsoever is seen is real or unreal. There is no way to +judge; the eyes are not the judge. + +Then the picture is transformed into chemical messages. Those chemical messages are +like electrical waves; they go somewhere in the head. It is still unknown where the point +is that the eyes come in contact with the surface of seeing. Just waves reach to me and +then they are decoded. Then I again decode them, and in this way I know what is +happening. + +I am always inside, and you are always outside, and there is no meeting. So whether you +are real or just a dream is a problem. Even this very moment, there is no way to judge +whether I am dreaming or you are really here. Listening to me, how can you say that +really you are listening to me, that you are not dreaming? There is no way. That is why +the attitude which you maintain the whole day is carried over into the night. + +And while you are dreaming you take it as real. + +Try the opposite; that is what Shankara means. He says that the whole world is an +illusion, he says the whole world is a dreaming — remember this. But we are stupid +people. If Shankara says, "This is a dream," then we say, "What is the need to do +anything? If this is just a dream, then there is no need to eat. Why go on eating and +thinking that this is a dream? Don’t eat!" But then remember — when you feel hunger, it +is a dream. Or eat, and when you feel that you have eaten too much, remember, this is a +dream. + +Shankara is not telling you to change the dream, remember, because the effort to change +the dream is again falsely based on the belief that it is real; otherwise there is no need to +change anything. Shankara is just saying that whatever is the case is a dream. + + + +Remember this: do not do anything to change it, just remember it constantly. Try to +remember for three weeks continuously that whatsoever you are doing it is just a dream. +In the beginning it is very difficult. You will fall again and again into the old pattern of +the mind, you will start thinking that this is a reality. You will have to constantly awaken +yourself to remind yourself that "This is a dream." If for three weeks continuously you +can maintain this attitude, then in the fourth or fifth week, any night while dreaming you +will suddenly remember that "This is a dream." + + +This is one way to penetrate dreams with consciousness, with awareness. If you can +remember in the night while dreaming that this is a dream, then in the day you will not +need any effort to remember that this is also a dream. You will know it then. + +In the beginning, while you are practicing this, it will be just a make-believe. You start +just in faith.. ."This is a dream." But when you can remember in dreaming that this is a +dream, it will become a reality. Then in the day, when you get up you will not feel that +you are getting up from sleep, you will feel you are simply getting up from one dreaming +to another. Then it will become a reality. And if the whole twenty-four hours becomes +dreaming, and you can feel and remember it, you will be standing at your center. Then +your consciousness will have become double-arrowed. + +You are feeling dreams, and if you are feeling them as dreams you will start to feel the +dreamer — the subject. If you take dreams as real, you cannot feel the subject. If the film +has become real, you forget yourself. When the film stops and you know that it was +unreal, your reality erupts, breaks out; you can feel yourself. This is one way. + +This has been one of the oldest Indian methods. That is why we have insisted on the +world being unreal. We do not mean it philosophically; we do not say that this house is +unreal so you can pass through the walls. + +We do not mean that! When we say that this house is unreal, it is a device. This is not an +argument against the house. + +So Berkeley proposed that the whole world is just a dream. One day, in the morning, he +was walking with Dr. Johnson. Dr. Johnson was a hardened realist, so Berkeley said, +"Have you heard about my theory? I am working on it. I feel that the whole world is +unreal, and it cannot be proved that it is real. And the burden of proving it is on those +who say that it is real. I say it is unreal — just like dreams. Johnson was not a philosopher, +but he had a very astute logical mind. + +They are on the street, just walking in the morning on a lonely street. Johnson then takes +one stone in his hand and hits Berkeley's leg. Blood oozes out, and Berkeley screams. +Johnson says, "Why are you screaming if the stone is just a dream? Whatsoever you say, +you believe in the reality of the stone. What you are saying is one thing, and your +behavior is something different and contrary. If your house is just a dream, then to where +are you returning? Where are you returning after the morning walk? If your wife is just a +dream, you will not meet her again." + +Realists have always argued this way, but they cannot argue this way with Shankara +because his is not a philosophical theory. It is not saying anything about the reality; it is +not proposing anything about the universe. + + +Rather, it is a device to change your mind, to change the basic fixed attitude so that you +can look at the world in a different, an altogether different way. + + + +This is a problem, continuously a problem for Indian thought — because for Indian +thought everything is just a device for meditation. We are not concerned about its being +true or untrue. We are concerned about its utility in transforming man. + +This is emphatically different from the Western mind. When they propose a theory they +are concerned with whether this is true or untrue, whether this can be proved logically or +not. When we propose anything we are not concerned about its truth; we are concerned +about its utility, we are concerned about its capacity, its capability to transform the +human mind. It may be true, it may not be true. Really, it is neither — it is simply a +device. + +I have seen flowers outside. In the morning the sun rises and everything is just beautiful. +You have never been outside, and you have never seen flowers, and you have never seen +the morning sun. You have never seen the open sky; you do not know what beauty is. + +You have lived in a closed prison. I want to lead you out. I want you to come out under +the open sky to meet these flowers. How am I to do it? + +You do not know flowers. If I talk about flowers, you think, "He has gone mad. There are +no flowers." If I talk about the morning sun, you think, "He is a visionary. + +He sees visions and dreams. He is a poet." If I talk about the open sky, you will laugh. +You will start laughing, "Where is the open sky? There are only walls and walls and +walls." + +So what am I to do? I must devise something which you can understand and which helps +you to go out, so I say that the house is on fire and I start running. It becomes infectious: +you run after me and go out. Then you will know that what I said was neither true nor +false. It was just a device. Then you will know flowers and then you can forgive me. +Buddha was doing that, Mahavir was doing that, Shiva was doing that, Shankara was +doing that. We can forgive them later on. We have always forgiven them because once +we go out we know what they were doing. And then we understand that it was useless to +argue with them because it was not a question of arguing. The fire was nowhere, but we +could not understand only that language. Flowers were, but we could not understand the +language of the flowers, those symbols were meaningless for us. + +So this is one way. Then there is a second method at the other pole. This method makes +one pole; the other method makes another pole of the same thing. One method is to start +feeling, remembering, that everything is a dream. The other is not to think anything about +the world, but just to go on remembering that YOU ARE. + +Gurdjieff used this second method. + +This second method comes from the Sufi tradition, from Islam. They worked on it very +deeply. Remember "I am" — whatsoever you are doing. You are drinking water, you are +eating your food — remember, "I am." Go on eating and go on remembering, "I am, I +am." Do not forget it! It is difficult because you already think that you know you are, so +what is the need to go on remembering this? You never remember it, but it is a very, very +potential technique. + +When walking remember, "I am." Let the walking be there, go on walking, but be +constantly fixed in this self-remembering of "I am, I am, I am." Do not forget this. You +are listening to me — just do it here. You are listening to me. Do not be so much merged, +involved, identified. Whatsoever I am saying, remember, go on remembering. Listening +is there, words are there, someone is talking, you are — "I am, I am, I am." Let this "I +am" be a constant factor of awareness. + + + +It is very difficult. You cannot remember continuously even for a single minute. Try it. +Put your watch before your eyes and look at the hands moving. One second, two seconds, +three seconds... go on looking at it. Do two things: look at the movement of the hand +which is showing seconds, and continuously remember "I am, I am." With every second +go on remembering "I am." Within five or six seconds you will feel that you have +forgotten. Suddenly you will remember that "Many seconds have passed and I have not +remembered 'I am.’ + + +Even to remember for one complete minute is a miracle. And if you can remember for +one minute, the technique is for you. Then do it. Through it you will be capable of going +beyond dreams and of knowing that dreams are dreams. + +How does it work? If the whole day you can remember "I am," then this will penetrate +your sleep also. And when you will be dreaming, continuously you will remember, "I +am." If you can remember "I am" in the dream, suddenly the dream becomes just a +dream. Then the dream cannot deceive you, then the dream cannot be felt as reality. This +is the mechanism: the dream is felt as reality because you are missing the self- +remembering; you are missing "I am." If there is no remembering of oneself, then the +dream becomes reality. If there is the remembering of oneself, then reality, the so-called +reality, becomes just a dream. + +This is the difference between dreaming and reality. For a meditative mind, or for the +science of meditation, this is the only difference. If you are, then the whole reality is just +a dream. If you are not, then the dreaming becomes reality. + +Nagarjuna says, "Now I am, for the world is not. While I was not, the world was. Only +one can exist." That doesn’t mean that the world has disappeared. Nagarjuna is not +talking about this world, he is talking about the world of dreaming. Either you can be or +the dreams can be — both cannot be. + + +So the first step will be to continue remembering "I am" constantly; simply, "I am." Do +not say "Ram," do not say "Shyam." Do not use any name, because you are not that. +Simply use, "I am." + +Try it in any activity and then feel it. The more real you become inside, the more unreal +becomes the surrounding world. The reality becomes "I", and the world becomes unreal. +The world is real or the "I" is real — both cannot be real. You are feeling that you are just +a dream now; then the world is real. Change the emphasis. Become real, and the world +will become unreal. + +Gurdjieff worked on this method continuously. His chief disciple, P. D. Ouspensky, +relates that when Gurdjieff was working on him with this method, and he was practicing +for three months continuously this remembering of "I am, I am, I am," after three months +everything stopped. Thoughts, dreaming, everything stopped. Only one note remained +inside like eternal music: "I am, I am, I am, I am." But then this was not an effort. This +was a spontaneous activity going on: "I am." Then Gurdjieff called Ouspensky out of the +house. For three months he had been kept in the house and wasn't allowed to move out. +Then Gurdjieff said, "Come with me." They were residing in a Russian town, Tiflis. +Gurdjieff called him out and they went into the street. Ouspensky writes in his diary, "For +the first time I could understand what Jesus meant when he said that man is asleep. + + + +The whole city looked to me as if it was asleep. People were moving in their sleep; +shopkeepers were selling in their sleep; customers were buying in their sleep. The whole +city was asleep. I looked at Gurdjieff: only he was awake. The whole city was asleep. +They were angry, they were fighting, they were loving, buying, selling, doing +everything." + +Ouspensky says, "Now I could see their faces, their eyes: they were asleep. They were +not there. The inner center was missing; it was not there." Ouspensky said to Gurdjieff, "I +do not want to go there any more. What has happened to the city? Everyone seems +asleep, drugged." + +Gurdjieff said, "Nothing has happened to the city, something has happened to you. You +have been undrugged; the city is the same. It is the same place you moved around in three +months ago, but you couldn’t see that other people are asleep because you were also +asleep. Now you can see because a certain quality of awareness has come to you. With +three months of practising "I am" continuously, you have become aware in a very small +measure. You have become aware! A part of your consciousness has gone beyond +dreaming. That is why you can see that everyone is asleep, dead, moving, drugged, as if +hypnotized." + +Ouspensky says, "I couldn’t bear that phenomenon — everyone asleep! Whatsoever they +are doing, they are not responsible for it. They are not! How can they be responsible?" + +He came back and he asked Gurdjieff, "What is this? Am I deceived somehow? Have you +done something to me that the whole city seems asleep? I cannot believe my own eyes." + + +But this will happen to anyone. If you can remember yourself, then you will know that no +one is remembering himself, and in this way each goes on moving. The whole world is +asleep. But start while you are awake. Any moment that you remember, start "I am." + +I do not mean that you have to repeat the words "I am," rather, have the feeling. Taking a +bath, feel "I am." Let there be the touch of the cold shower, and let yourself be there +behind, feeling it and remembering "I am." Remember, I am not saying that verbally you +have to repeat "I am." You can repeat it, but that repetition will not give you awareness. +Repetition may even create more sleep. There are many people who are repeating many +things. They go on repeating "Ram, Ram, Ram..." and if they are just repeating without +awareness then this "Ram, Ram, Ram..." becomes a drug. They can sleep well through it. +That is why Mahesh Yogi has so much appeal in the West, because he is giving mantras +for people to repeat. And in the West sleep has become one of the most serious problems. +Sleep is totally disturbed. Natural sleep has disappeared. Only through tranquilizers and +drugs can you sleep; otherwise sleep has become impossible. This is the reason for +Mahesh Yogi's appeal. It is because if you constantly repeat something, that repetition +gives you deep sleep; that is all. + +So the so-called transcendental meditation is nothing but a psychological tranquilizer. + +It is nothing — just a tranquilizer. It helps, but it is good for sleep, not for meditation. You +can sleep well, a more calm sleep will be there. It is good, but it is not meditation at all. If +you repeat a word constantly it creates a certain boredom, and boredom is good for sleep. +So anything monotonous, repetitive can help sleep. The child in the mother's womb +sleeps for nine months continuously, and the reason for this you may not know. The +reason is only the "tick-tock, tick-tock" of the heart of the mother. Continuously there is +the beat, the heartbeat. It is one of the most monotonous things in the world. With the + + + +same beat continuously repeating, the child is drugged. He goes on sleeping. + +That is why whenever the child is crying, screaming, creating any problem, the mother +puts his head near her heart. Then suddenly he feels good and goes into sleep. Again it is +due to the heartbeat. He becomes again a part of the womb. That is why even if you are +not a child and your wife, your beloved puts your head on her heart, you will feel sleepy +from the monotonous beat. + +Psychologists suggest that if you cannot sleep, then concentrate on the clock. Just +concentrate on the clock's tick-tock, tick-tock. It repeats the heartbeat, and you can fall +asleep. Anything repetitive will help. + +So this "I am," the remembering of "I am," is not a verbal mantra. + +It is not going to be repeated verbally — feel it! Be sensitive to your being. When you +touch someone's hand do not only touch his hand, feel your touch also, feel yourself also +— that you are here in this touch, present totally. While eating, do not only eat, feel +yourself eating as well. This feeling, this sensitivity must penetrate deeper and deeper +into your mind. + +One day, suddenly, you are awake at your center, functioning for t'e first time. And then +the whole world becomes a dream, then you can know that your dreaming is a dreaming. +And when you know that qour dreaming is a dreaming, dreaming stops. It can continue +only if it is felt as real. It is stopped if it is felt as unreal. + +And once dreaming stops in you, you are a different man. The old man is dead; the sleepy +man is dead. That human being which you were you are no more. For the first time you +become aware; for the first time in the whole world that is asleep, you are awake. You +become a buddha, an awakened one. + +With this awakening there is no misery, after this awakening there is no death, through +this awakening there is no more fear. You become for the first time free of everything. To +be free of sleep, to be free of dreaming, is to be free of everything. You attain freedom. +Hate, anger, greed disappear. You become just love. Not loving, you become just love! +One question more — and it is relatively the same — + +Question 2 + +IF WE ARE ALL ACTORS IN A PLAY THAT IS ALREADY WRITTEN, HOW CAN +MEDITATION TRANSFORM US WITHOUT THE PLAY ITSELF CONTAINING A +CHAPTER FOR OUR TRANSFORMATION AT A SPECIFIC TIME? AND IF SUCH +A CHAPTER IS THERE ALREADY WAITING TO UNFOLD AT ITS DUE TIME, +WHY MEDITATE? WHY MAKE ANY EFFORT AT ALL? + +This is the same; it contains the same fallacy. + +I am not saying that everything is detennined. I am not proposing this as a theory to +explain the universe. It is a device. + +India has always been working with this device of fate. It is not meant by this that +everything is predetennined. This is not meant at all! The only reason to propose this is +that if you take it that everything is determined, everything becomes a dream. If you take +things in this way, if you believe this way — that everything is predetermined; that, for +example, you are going to die on a particular day — EVERYTHING becomes a dream. It +is not determined, it is not fixed! No one is that much interested in you. The universe is +completely unaware of you and when you are going to die. It is so useless a thing. Your +death is irrelevant to the universe. + +Do not think yourself so important that the whole universe is determining your day of + + + +death — the time, the minute, the moment — no! You are NOT the center. It makes no +difference to the universe whether you are or you are not. But this fallacy goes on +working in the mind. It is created in childhood and it becomes part of the unconscious. + +A child is bom. He cannot give anything to the world, but he has to take many things. He +cannot repay, he cannot give back anything. He is so impotent — just helpless. He will +need food, he will need love, he will need shelter, he will need warmth. + +Everything is to be supplied. + +A child is born absolutely helpless — particularly man's child. No animal is so helpless. +That is why no animal creates a family — there is no need. But man’s child is so helpless, +so absolutely helpless, he cannot exist without there being a mother to protect, a father, a +family, a society. He cannot exist alone. He would die immediately. + +He is so much dependent. He will need love, he will need food, he will need everything, +and he will demand everything. And the mother will supply, the father will supply, the +family will supply. The child begins to think that he is the center of the whole world. +Everything is to be supplied to him; he has but to demand. Just to demand is enough, no +other effort is needed. + +So the child begins to think of himself as the center, and everything just goes on around +him, for him. The whole existence seems to be created for him. The whole existence was +waiting for him to come and demand. And everything will be fulfilled. This is a +necessity, that his demands should be fulfilled; otherwise he will die. But this necessity +becomes very dangerous. + +He grows up with this attitude that "I am the center." By and by he will demand more. A +child's demands are very simple; they can be supplied. But as he will grow his demands +will become more and more complex. Sometimes it will not be possible to supply them, +to fulfill them. + +Sometimes it may be absolutely impossible. He may demand the moon, or anything.... +The more he will grow, the more the demands will become complex, impossible. Then +frustration sets in, and the child begins to think that now he is being deceived. He has +taken it for granted that he was the center of the world. Now problems will be there, and +by and by he will be dethroned. When he becomes an adult, he will be completely +dethroned. Then he will know that he is not the center. But deep down the unconscious +mind goes on thinking in terms of him being the center. + +People come and ask me whether their fate is determined. They are asking whether they +are so important, so significant for this universe that their fate must be determined +beforehand. "What is my purpose?" they ask. "Why was I created?" This childhood +nonsense that you are the center creates these questions like, "For what purpose am I +created?" + +You are not created for any purpose. And it is good that you are not created for any +purpose; otherwise you would be a machine. A machine is created for some purpose. +Man is not created for some purpose, for something — no! Man is just the outflowing, +overflowing creation. Everything simply is. Flowers are there and stars are there and you +are there. Everything is just an overflowing, a joy, a celebration of existence without any +purpose. + +But this theory of fate, of predetennination, is what creates problems, because we take it +as a theory. + + + +We think that everything is determined, but nothing is determined. However, this +technique uses this as a device. When we say everything is determined, this is not said to +you as a theory. The purpose is this: that if you take life as a drama, predetermined, then +it becomes a dream. For example, if I knew that this day, this night, I was going to talk to +you, and it is predetermined what words I should speak on this day, and if it is so fixed +that nothing can be changed — that I cannot utter a single new word — then suddenly I am +not related at all with this whole process because then I am not the source of action. + +If everything is determined and if every word is to be spoken by the universe itself or by +the divine or by whatsoever name you choose, then I am no more the source of it. Then I +can become an observer — a simple observer. + +If you take life as predetennined then you can observe it, then you are not involved. If +you are a failure, it was predetermined; if you are a success, it was predetermined. If both +are predetennined, both become of equal value — synonymous. Then one is Ravan, one is +Ram, and everything is predetermined. Ravan need not feel guilty, Ram need not feel +superior. Everything is predetermined, so you are just actors, you are just on a stage +playing a role. + +To give you the feeling that you are playing a role, to give you the feeling that this is only +a predetennined pattern that you are fulfilling, to give you this feeling so that you can +transcend it, this is the device. + +It is very difficult because we are so much accustomed to thinking of fate as a theory — +not only as a theory, but as a law. We cannot understand this attitude of taking these laws +and theories as devices. + +I will explain this to you. One example will be helpful. I was in a city. One man came; he +was a Mohammedan, but I didn't know, I was not aware. And he was dressed so that he +looked like a Hindu. He not only looked like a Hindu, but he talked as if he was of the +Hindu type. He was not a Mohammedan type. + +He asked me one question. He said, "Mohammedans and Christians say that there is only +one life. Hindus, Buddhists and Jains say there are many lives — a long sequence of lives, +so that unless one is liberated one goes on and on being reborn again and again. So what +do you say? If Jesus was an enlightened man, he must have known. Or Mohammed, or +Moses, they must have known too if they were enlightened men that there are many lives +and not just one. And if you say that they are right, then what about Mahavir, Krishna, +Buddha and Shankara? One thing is certain, that they cannot all be enlightened. + +"If Christianity is right then Buddha is wrong, then Krishna is wrong, then Mahavir is +wrong. And if Mahavir, Krishna and Buddha are right, then Mohammed, Jesus and +Moses are wrong. So tell me. I am very much puzzled; I am in a mess, confused. And +both cannot be right. + +How can both be right? Either there are many lives or there is one. How can both be +right?" He was a very intelligent man, and he had studied many things, so he said, "You +cannot just escape and say that both are right. Both cannot be right. It is logically so — +both cannot be right." + +But I said, "This need not be; your approach is absolutely wrong. Both are devices. +Neither is right, neither is wrong — both are devices." It became impossible for him to +understand what I meant by a device. + +Mohammed, Jesus and Moses, they were talking to one type of mind, and Buddha, +Mahavir, Krishna, they were talking to a very different type of mind. There are really two + + + +source religions — the Hindu and the Jewish. So all the religions born out of India, all the +religions born out of Hinduism believe in rebirth, in many births; and all the religions +bom out of Jewish thinking — Mohammedanism, Christianity — they believe in one life. +These are two devices. + +Try to understand it. Because our minds are fixed, we take things as theories, not as +devices. So many times people come to me and say, "One day you said this is right, and +another day you said that is right, and both cannot be right." Of course both cannot be +right, but no one is saying that both are right. I am not concerned at all with which is +right and which is wrong. I am only concerned with which device works. + + +In India they use this device of many lives. Why? There are many points. All the +religions bom in the West, particularly out of Jewish thinking, were religions of poor +people. Their prophets were uneducated. Jesus was not educated, Mohammed was not +educated, Moses was not. They were all uneducated, unsophisticated, simple, and they +were talking with masses who were not sophisticated at all, who were poor; they were not +rich. + +For a poor man, one life is more than enough, more than enough! He is starving, dying. If +you say to him that there are so many lives, that he will go on being reborn and reborn, +that he will move in a wheel of a thousand and one lives, the poor man will just feel +frustrated about the whole thing. "What are you saying?" a poor man will ask. "One life +is too much, so do not talk of a thousand and one lives, of a million lives. Do not speak +this. Give us heaven immediately after this life." God becomes a reality only if he can be +achieved after this life — immediately. + +Buddha, Mahavir, Krishna, were talking to a very rich society. Today it has become +difficult to understand because the whole wheel has turned. Now the West is rich and the +East is poor. Then the West was poor and the East was rich. All the Hindu avatars, all the +TIRTHANKARAS — world teachers — of the Jains, all the buddhas — awakened ones — +they were all princes. + +They belonged to royal families. They were cultured, educated, sophisticated, refined in +every way. You cannot refine Buddha more. He was absolutely refined, cultured, +educated; nothing can be added. Even if Buddha comes today, nothing can be added. + +So they were talking to a society which was rich. Remember, for a rich society there are +different problems. For a rich society, pleasure is meaningless, heaven is meaningless. + +For a poor society, heaven is very meaningful. If the society is living in heaven, heaven +becomes meaningless, so you cannot propose this. You cannot create an urge to do +something for heaven; they are already in it — and bored. + +So Buddha, Mahavir, Krishna, do not talk about heaven, they talk of freedom. They do +not talk of a pleasant world beyond, they talk of a transcendental world where there is +neither pain nor pleasure. Jesus' heaven would not have appealed to them — they were +already in it. + +And secondly, for a rich man the real problem is boredom. For a poor man, promise him +pleasure in the future. For a poor man, suffering is the problem. For a rich man, suffering +is not the problem; for a rich man, boredom is the problem. He is bored of all pleasures. +Mahavir, Buddha and Krishna, all used this boredom, and they said, "If you do not do +anything you are going to be born again and again. This wheel will move. Remember, the +same life will be repeated. + + + +The same sex, the same richness, the same food, the same palaces again and again: a +thousand and one times you will be moving in a wheel." + +To a rich man who has known all pleasures this is not a good prospect, this repetition. +Repetition is the problem. That is the suffering for him. He wants something new, and +Mahavir and Buddha say, "There is nothing new. This world is old. Nothing is new under +the heavens, everything is just old. You have tasted all these things before and you will +go on tasting them. You are in a wheel, moving. Go beyond it, take a jump out of the +wheel." + +For a rich man, if you create a device which intensifies his feeling of boredom, only then +can he move toward meditation. For a poor man, if you talk about boredom you are +saying meaningless things. A poor man is never bored — never! Only a rich man is bored. +A poor man is never bored; he is always thinking of the future. Something is going to +happen and everything will be okay. The poor man needs a promise, but if the promise is +a very long way away it becomes meaningless. It must be immediate. + +Jesus is reported to have said that "In my lifetime, in your lifetime, you will see the +kingdom of God." That statement has haunted the whole of Christianity for twenty +centuries, because Jesus said, "In YOUR life, immediately, you are going to see the +kingdom of God." And the kingdom of God has not come even yet, so what did he mean? +And he said, "The world is going to end soon, so do not waste time! Time is short." + +Jesus said, "Time is very short. It is foolish to waste it. Immediately the world is going to +end and you will have to answer for yourself, so repent." + +Jesus created a feeling of immediacy through the concept of one life. He knew, and +Buddha and Mahavir also knew. Whatsoever they knew is not told. Whatsoever they +devised is known. This was a device to create immediacy, urgency, so that you would +begin to act. + +India was an old country, rich. There was no question of urgency in promises for the +future. There was only one way possible to create urgency, and that was to create more +boredom. If a man feels he is going to be born again and again, again and again, +infinitely, ad infinitum, he immediately comes and asks, "How to be freed from this +wheel? This is too much. Now I cannot continue it any more because whatsoever can be +known I have known. If this is to be repeated it is a nightmare. I do not want to repeat it, I +want something new." + +So Buddha and Mahavir say, "There is nothing new under the sky. Everything is old and +a repetition. And you have repeated for many, many lives, and you will go on repeating +for many, many lives. Beware of the repetition, beware of your boredom. Take a jump." +The device is different, but the purpose is the same. Take a jump! Move! Transform +yourself! Whatsoever you are, transform yourself from it. + +If we take religious statements as devices then there is no contradiction. + +Then Jesus and Krishna, Mohammed and Mahavir, mean the same thing. They create +different routes for different people, different techniques for different minds, different +appeals for different attitudes. But those are not principles to be fought and argued about. +They are devices to be used, transcended, and thrown. + +This much for today. + + +THE END. + + + +Chapter 7: Techniques to put you at ease + + +10. WHILE BEING CARESSED, SWEET PRINCESS, ENTER THE CARESS AS +EVERLASTING LIFE. + +11. STOP THE DOORS OF THE SENSES WHEN FEELING THE CREEPING OF AN +ANT. THEN. + +12. WHEN ON A BED ORA SEAT, LET YOURSELF BECOME WEIGHTLESS, +BEYOND MIND. + +Man has a center, but he lives off of it — off the center. That creates an inner tension, a +constant turmoil, anguish. You are not where you should be; you are not at your right +balance. You are off balance, and this being off balance, off center, is the base of all +mental tensions. If it becomes too much, you go mad. A madman is one who has gone out +of himself completely. The enlightened man is just the reverse of the madman. He is +centered in himself. + +You are in between. You have not gone completely out of yourself, and you are not at +your center either. You just move in the gap. Sometimes you move very, very far away, +so you have moments when you are temporarily mad. In anger, in sex, in anything in +which you have moved too far away from yourself, you are temporarily mad. Then there +is no difference between you and the madman. The difference is only that he is +pennanently there and you are temporarily there. You will come back. + +When you are in anger it is madness, but it is not pennanent. Qualitatively there is no +difference; quantitatively there is a difference. The quality is the same, so sometimes you +touch madness and sometimes, when you are relaxed, totally at ease, you touch your +center also. + +Those are the blissful moments. They happen. Then you are just like a Buddha or like a +Krishna, but only temporarily, momentarily. You will not stay there. Really, the moment +you realize that you are blissful you have moved. It is so momentary that by the time you +have recognized the bliss it is finished. + +We go on moving between these two, but this movement is dangerous. This movement is +dangerous because then you cannot create a self-image, a fixed self-image. You do not +know who you are. If you constantly move from madness to being centered in yourself, if +this movement is constant, you cannot have a solid image of yourself. You will have a +liquid image. Then you do not know who you are. It is very difficult. That is why you +even become afraid if you are expecting blissful moments, so you try to fix yourself +somewhere in between. + +This is what we mean by a nonnal human being: he never touches his madness in anger +and he never touches that total freedom, that ecstasy, either. He never moves from a solid +image. The normal man is really a dead man, living between these two points. That is +why all those who are exceptional — great artists, painters, poets — they are not nonnal. +They are very liquid. Sometimes they touch the center, sometimes they go mad. They +move fast between these two. Of course, their anguish is great, their tension is much. + +They have to live between two worlds, constantly changing themselves. + +That is why they feel that they have no identity. They feel, in the words of Cohn Wilson, +that they are outsiders. In your world of nonnality, they are outsiders. + + + +It will be helpful to define these four types. First is the normal man who has a fixed, solid +identity, who knows who he is — a doctor, an engineer, a professor, a saint — who knows +who he is and never moves from there. He constantly clings to the identity, to the image. +Second are those who have liquid images — poets, artists, painters, singers. They do not +know who they are. Sometimes they become just normal, sometimes they go mad, +sometimes they touch the ecstasy that a buddha touches. + +Third are those who are permanently mad. They have gone outside themselves; they +never come back into their home. They do not even remember that they have a home. + +And fourth are those who have reached their home... Buddha, Christ, Krishna. + +This fourth category — those who have reached their home — is totally relaxed. In their +consciousness there is no tension, no effort, no desire. In one word, there is no becoming. +They do not want to become anything. They are, they have been. No becoming! And they +are at ease with their being. Whatsoever they are, they are at ease with it. They do not +want to change it, do not want to go anywhere. They have no future. This very moment is +eternity for them. + +.. no longing, no desire. That does not mean that a buddha will not eat or a buddha will +not sleep. He will eat, he will sleep, but these are not desires. A buddha will not project +these desires: he will not eat tomorrow, he will eat today. + +Remember this. You go on eating in the tomorrow, you go on eating in the future; you go +on eating in the past, in the yesterday. It rarely happens that you eat today. While you are +eating today, your mind will be moving somewhere else. While you will be trying to go +to sleep, you will start eating tomorrow, or else the memory of the past will come. + +A buddha eats today. This very moment he lives. He does not project his life into the +future; there is no future for him. Whenever future comes, it comes as the present. It is +always today, it is always now. So a buddha eats, but he never eats in the mind — +remember this. There is no cerebral eating. You go on eating in the mind. It is absurd +because the mind is not meant for eating. All your centers are confused; your entire body- +mind arrangement is mixed up, it is mad. + +A buddha eats, but he never thinks of eating. And that applies to everything. So a buddha +is as ordinary as you while he is eating. Do not think that a buddha is not going to eat, or +that when the hot sun is there he is not going to perspire, or when cold winds come he +will not feel cold. He will feel it, but he will feel always in the present, never in the +future. + +There is no becoming. If there is no becoming there is no tension. Understand this very +clearly. If there is no becoming, how can there be any tension? Tension means you want +to be something else which you are not. + +You are A and you want to be B; you are poor and you want to be a rich man; you are +ugly and you want to be beautiful; or you are stupid and you want to be a wise man. +Whatsoever the wanting, whatsoever the desire, the form is always this: A wants to +become B. Whatsoever you are, you are not content with it. For contentment something +else is needed — that is the constant structure of a mind that is desiring. When you get it, +again the mind will say that "This is not enough, something else is needed." + +The mind always moves on and on. Whatsoever you get becomes useless. The moment +you get it, it is useless. This is desire. Buddha has called it TRISHNA: this is becoming. +You move from one life to another, from one world to another, and this goes on. It can +continue ad infinitum. There is no end to it, there is no end to desire, desiring. But if there + + + +is no becoming, if you accept totally whatsoever you are — ugly or beautiful, wise or +stupid, rich or poor — whatsoever you are, if you accept it in its totality, becoming ceases. +Then there is no tension; then the tension cannot exist. Then there is no anguish. You are +at ease, you are not worried. + +This non-becoming mind is a mind that is centered in the self. + +On quite the opposite pole is the madman. He has no being, he is only a becoming. He +has forgotten what he is. The A is forgotten completely and he is trying to be B. He no +longer knows who he is; he only kn ows his desired goal. He doesn't live here and now, he +lives somewhere else. That is why he looks crazy to us, mad, because you live in this +world and he lives in the world of his dreams. He is not part of your world, he is living +somewhere else. He has completely forgotten his reality here and now. And with himself +he has forgotten the world around him, which is real. He lives in an unreal world — for +him, that is the only reality. + +A buddha lives this very moment in the being and the madman is just the opposite. He +never lives in the here and now, in the being, but always in the becoming — somewhere +on the horizon. These are the two polar opposites. + +So remember, the madman is not against you, he is against the buddha. And remember +also, the buddha is not against you, he is against the madman. You are in between. You +are both, mixed; you have madnesses, you have moments of enlightenment, but both are +mixed. + +Sometimes a glimpse into the center suddenly happens, if you are relaxed. There are +moments when you are relaxed. You are in love: for a few moments, for a single +moment, your lover, your beloved is with you. + +It has been a long desire, a long effort, and at last your beloved is with you. For a +moment the mind goes off. There has been a long effort to be with the beloved. The mind +has been hankering and hankering and hankering, and the mind has always been thinking, +thinking about the beloved. Now the beloved is there and suddenly the mind cannot +think. The old process cannot be continued. You were asking for the beloved; now the +beloved is there, so the mind simply stops. + +In that moment when the beloved is there, there is no desire. You are relaxed; suddenly +you are thrown back to yourself. Unless a lover can throw you to yourself it is not love. +Unless you become yourself in the presence of the beloved, it is not love. Unless mind +completely ceases to function in the presence of the lover or the beloved, it is not love. +Sometimes it happens that mind ceases and for a moment there is no desire. Love is +desireless. Try to understand this: you may desire love, but love is desireless. When love +happens there is no desire; mind is quiet, calm, relaxed. No more becoming, nowhere to +go- + +But this happens only for a few moments, if it happens at all. If you have really loved +someone, then it will happen for a few moments. It is a shock. The mind cannot work +because its whole function has become useless, absurd. The one for whom you were +longing is there, and the mind cannot think what to do now. + + +For a few moments the whole mechanism stops. You are relaxed in yourself. You have +touched your being, your center, and you feel you are at the source of well-being. A bliss +fdls you, a fragrance surrounds you. Suddenly you are not the same man you were. + + + +That is why love transforms so much. If you are in love you cannot hide it. That is +impossible! If you are in love, it will show. Your eyes, your face, the way you walk, the +way you sit, everything will show it, because you are not the same man. The desiring +mind is not there. You are like a buddha just for a few moments. This cannot be +continued for long because it is just a shock. Immediately the mind will try to find some +ways and excuses to think again. + +For example, the mind may start thinking you have attained your goal, you have attained +your love, so now what? What are you going to do? Then the prophesying starts, the +arguments start. You begin thinking, "Today I have reached my beloved, but will it be the +same tomorrow also?" The mind has started working. And the moment mind is working +you have moved again into becoming. + +Sometimes even without love, just through fatigue, tiredness, one stops desiring. Then +too one is thrown to oneself. When you are not away from yourself you are bound to be +at your self, no matter what may be the cause of it. When one is tired totally, fatigued, +when one does not even feel like thinking or desiring, when one is frustrated completely, +without any hope, then suddenly one feels at home. + +Now he cannot go anywhere. All the doors are closed; hope has disappeared — and with +it desire, with it becoming. + +It will not be for long because your mind has a mechanism. It can go off for a few +moments, but suddenly it will come alive again because you cannot exist hopelessly, you +will have to find some hope. You cannot exist without desire. Because you do not know +how to exist without desire, you will have to create some desire. + +In any situation where it happens that suddenly the mind ceases functioning, you are at +your center. You are on a holiday, in a forest or at a hill station, or on a beach: suddenly +your routine mind will not work. The office is not there, the wife is not there, or the +husband is not there. Suddenly there is a very new situation, and the mind will need some +time to function in it, to be adjusted to it. The mind feels unadjusted. The situation is so +new that you relax, and you are at your center. + +In these moments you become a buddha, but these will only be moments. Then they will +haunt you, and then you would like to reproduce them again and again and repeat them. +But remember, they happened spontaneously, so you cannot repeat them. And the more +you try to repeat them, the more it will be impossible for them to come to you. + +That is happening to everyone. You loved someone, and in the first meeting your mind +ceased for a few moments. + +Then you got married. Why did you get married? To repeat those beautiful moments +again and again. But when they happened you were not married, and they cannot happen +in marriage because the whole situation is different. When two people meet for the first +time, the whole situation is new. Their minds cannot function in it. They are so +overwhelmed by it — so filled by the new experience, by the new life, the new flowering! +Then the mind starts functioning and they think. "This is such a beautiful moment! I want +to go on repeating it every day, so I should get married." + +Mind will destroy everything. Marriage means mind. Love is spontaneous; marriage is +calculating. Getting married is a mathematical thing. Then you wait for those moments, +but they will never come again. That is why every married man and woman is frustrated +— because they are waiting for certain things that happened in the past. Why are they not +happening again? They cannot happen because you are missing the whole situation. Now + + + +you are not new; now there is no spontaneity; now love is a routine. Now everything is +expected and demanded. Now love has become a duty, not a fun. It was fun in the +beginning; now it is a duty. And duty cannot give you the same bliss that fun can give. It +is impossible! Your mind has created the whole thing. Now you go on expecting, and the +more you expect the less is the possibility of its happening. + + +This happens everywhere, not only in marriage. You go to a master and the experience is +new. His presence, his words, his way of life are new. Suddenly your mind stops +functioning. Then you think, "This is the man for me, so I must go every day." Then you +get married to him. By and by frustration sets in because you have made it a duty, a +routine. Now those same experiences will not be coming. Then you think this man has +deceived you or that you were fooled somehow. Then you think, "The first experience +was hallucinatory. I must have been hypnotized or something. It was not real." + +It was real. Your routine mind makes it unreal. And then the mind tries to expect, but the +first time it happened you were not expecting. You had come without any expectations, +you were just open to receive whatsoever was happening. + +Now you come every day with expectations, with a closed mind. It cannot happen. It +always happens in an open mind; it always happens in a new situation. That doesn't mean +that you have to change your situation daily, it only means: do not allow your mind to +create a pattern. Then your wife will be new every day, your husband will be new every +day. But do not allow the mind to create a pattern of expectations; do not allow the mind +to move in the future. Then your master will be every day new, your friend will be every +day new. And everything is new in the world except the mind. + +Mind is the only thing which is old. It is always old. + +The sun is rising anew every day. It is not the old sun. The moon is new; the day, the +night, the flowers, the trees... everything is new except your mind. Your mind is always +old — remember, always — because mind needs the past, the accumulated experience, the +projected experience. Mind needs the past and life needs the present. Life is always +blissful — mind never is. Whenever you allow your mind to come in, misery sets in. + +These spontaneous moments will not be repeated again, so what to do? How to be in a +relaxed state continuously? These three sutras are for this. These are three techniques +concerning the feeling of ease, techniques to relax the nerves. + +How to remain in the being? How not to move into the becoming? It is difficult, arduous, +but these techniques can help. These techniques will throw you upon yourself. + +The first technique: WHILE BEING CARESSED, SWEET PRINCESS, ENTER THE +CARESSING AS EVERLASTING LIFE. Shiva starts with love. The first technique is +concerned with love, because love is the nearest thing in your experience in which you +are relaxed. If you cannot love, it is impossible for you to relax. If you can relax, your life +will become a loving life. + +A tense man cannot love. Why? A tense man always lives with purposes. He can earn +money, but he cannot love because love is purposeless. + +Love is not a commodity. You cannot accumulate it; you cannot make a bank balance of +it; you cannot strengthen your ego out of it. Really, love is the most absurd act, with no +meaning beyond it, no purpose beyond it. It exists in itself, not for anything else. + + + +You earn money FOR something — it is a means. You build a house for someone to live +in — it is a means. Love is not a means. Why do you love? For what do you love? Love is +the end in itself. That is why a mind that is calculative, logical, a mind that thinks in +terms of purpose, cannot love. And the mind that always thinks in terms of purpose will +be tense, because purpose can only be fulfdled in the future, never here and now. + +You are building a house — you cannot live in it just now, you will have to build it first. +You can live in it in the future, not now. You earn money — the bank balance will be +created in the future, not now. Means you will have to use now, and ends will come in the +future. + +Love is always here; there is no future to it. That is why love is so near to meditation. + +That is why death is also so near to meditation — because death is also always here and +now, it can never happen in the future. Can you die in the future? You can die only in the +present. No one has ever died in the future. How can you die in the future? Or how can +you die in the past? The past has gone, it is no more, so you cannot die in it. + +The future has not yet come, so how can you die in it? + +Death always occurs in the present. Death, love, meditation — they all occur in the +present. So if you are afraid of death, you cannot love. If you are afraid of love, you +cannot meditate. If you are afraid of meditation, your life will be useless. Useless not in +the sense of any purpose, but useless in the sense that you will never be able to feel any +bliss in it. It will be futile. + +It may seem strange to connect these three: love, meditation, death. It is not! They are +similar experiences. So if you can enter in one, you can enter in the remaining two. + +Shiva starts with love. He says, WHILE BEING CARESSED, SWEET PRINCESS, +ENTER THE CARESSING AS EVERLASTING LIFE. What does it mean? Many +things! One: while you are being loved the past has ceased, the future is not. You move +in the dimension of the present. You move in THE NOW. Have you ever loved someone? +If you have ever loved, then you know that the mind is no longer there. + +That is why the so-called wise men say that lovers are blind, mindless, mad. In essence +what they say is right. Lovers ARE blind because they have no eyes for the future, to +calculate what they are going to do. They are blind; they cannot see the past. What has +happened to lovers? They just move here and now without any consideration of past or +future, without any consideration of consequences. + +That is why they are called blind. They are! They are blind for those who are calculating, +and they are seers for those who are not calculating. Those who are not calculating will +see love as the real eye, the real vision. + +So the first thing: in the moment of love, past and future are no more. Then, one delicate +point is to be understood. When there is no past and no future, can you call this moment +the present? It is the present only between the two — between the past and the future. It is +relative. If there is no past and no future, what does it mean to call it the present? It is +meaningless. That is why Shiva doesn't use the word 'present'. He says, EVERLASTING +LIFE. He means eternity... enter eternity. + +We divide time into three parts — past, present, future. That division is false, absolutely +false. Time is really past and future. The present is not part of time. The present is part of +eternity. That which has passed is time; that which is to come is time. That which is, is +not time because it never passes — it is always here. The now is always here. It is +ALWAYS here! This now is eternal. + + + +If you move from the past, you never move into the present. From the past you always +move into the future; there comes no moment which is present. From the past you always +move into the future. From the present you can never move into the future. From the +present you go deeper and deeper, into more present and more present. + +This is everlasting life. + +We may say it in this way: from past to future is time. Time means you move on a plane, +on a straight line. Or we may call it horizontal. The moment you are in the present the +dimension changes: you move vertically — up or down, toward the height or toward the +depth. But then you never move horizontally. A Buddha, a Shiva, live in eternity, not in +time. + +Jesus was asked, "What will happen in your kingdom of God?" The man who asked him +was not asking about time. He was asking about what is going to happen to his desires, +about how they will be fulfilled. He was asking whether there will be life everlasting or +whether there will be death; whether there be any misery, whether there will be inferior +and superior men. He was asking things of this world when he asked, "What is going to +happen in your kingdom of God?" And Jesus replied — the reply is like that of a Zen +monk — "There shall be time no longer." + +The man who was replied to in this way may not have understood at all: "There shall be +time no longer." Only this one thing Jesus said — "There shall be time no longer," +because time is horizontal and the kingdom of God is vertical... it is eternal. It is always +here! You have only to move away from time to enter into it. + +So love is the first door. Through it, you can move away from time. That is why everyone +wants to be loved, everyone wants to love. + +And no one knows why so much significance is given to love, why there is such a deep +longing for love. And unless you know it rightly, you can neither love nor be loved, +because love is one of the deepest phenomena upon this earth. + +We go on thinking that everyone is capable of love as he is. This is not the case — it is not +so. That is why you are frustrated. Love is a different dimension, and if you try to love +someone in time you will be defeated in your effort. In time, love is not possible. + +I remember one anecdote. Meera was in love with Krishna. She was a housewife — the +wife of a prince. The prince became jealous of Krishna. Krishna was no more; Krishna +was not present, Krishna was not a physical body. There was a gap of five thousand years +between Krishna’s physical existence and Meera's physical existence. So really, how can +Meera be in love with Krishna? The time gap was so great. + +One day the prince, her husband, asked Meera, "You go on talking about your love, you +go on dancing and singing around Krishna, but where is he? With whom are you so much +in love? With whom are you talking continuously?" Meera was talking with Krishna, +singing, laughing, fighting. She looked mad — she was, in our eyes. The prince said, +"Have you gone mad? Where is your Krishna? Whom are you loving? With whom are +you conversing? I am here, and you have completely forgotten me." + + +Meera said, "Krishna is here — you are not here — because Krishna is eternal; you are not. +He will always be here, he was always here, he is here. You will not be here; you were +not here. You were not here one day, you will not be here another day, so how can I +believe that between these two non-existences you are here? How is an existence possible + + + +between two non-existences?" + +The prince is in time, but Krishna is in eternity. So you can be near the prince, but the +distance cannot be destroyed. You will be distant. You may be very, very distant in time +from Krishna, but you can be near. It is a different dimension, however. + +I look in front of me and there is a wall; I move my eyes and there is a sky. When you +look in time there is always a wall. When you look beyond time there is the open sky... +infinite. Love opens the infinity, the everlastingness of existence. So really, if you have +ever loved, love can be made a technique of meditation. This is the technique: WHILE +BEING LOVED, SWEET PRINCESS, ENTER LOVING AS EVERLASTING LIFE. +Do not be a lover standing aloof, outside. Become loving and move into eternity. When +you are loving someone, are you there as the lover? If you are there, then you are in time +and love is just false, just pseudo. If you are still there and you can say, "I am," then you +can be physically near but spiritually you are poles apart. + + +While in love, YOU must not be — only love, only loving. Become loving. While +caressing your lover or beloved become the caress. While kissing, do not be the kisser or +the kissed — be the kiss. Forget the ego completely, dissolve it into the act. Move into the +act so deeply that the actor is no more. And if you cannot move into love, it is difficult to +move into eating or walking — very difficult, because love is the easiest approach for +dissolving the ego. That is why those who are egoists cannot love. They may talk about +it, they may sing about it, they may write about it, but they cannot love. The ego cannot +love! + +Shiva says, become loving. When you are in the embrace, become the embrace, become +the kiss. Forget yourself so totally that you can say, "I am no more. Only love exists." +Then the heart is not beating but love is beating. Then the blood is not circulating, love is +circulating. And eyes are not seeing, love is seeing. Then hands are not moving to touch, +love is moving to touch. + +Become love and enter everlasting life. Love suddenly changes your dimension. You are +thrown out of time and you are facing eternity. Love can become a deep meditation — the +deepest possible. Lovers have known sometimes what saints have not known. And lovers +have touched that center which many yogis have missed. But it will be just a glimpse +unless you transform your love into meditation. + +Tantra means this: the transformation of love into meditation. And now you can +understand why tantra talks so much about love and sex. Why? Because love is the +easiest natural door from where you can transcend this world, this horizontal dimension. +Look at Shiva with his consort, Devi. Look at them! They don’t seem to be two — they +are one. The oneness is so deep that it has even gone into symbols. We all have seen the +Shivalinga. It is a phallic symbol — Shiva's sex organ — but it is not alone, it is based in +Devi's vagina. The Hindus of the old days were very daring. Now when you see a +Shivalinga you never remember that it is a phallic symbol. We have forgotten; we have +tried to forget it completely. + +Jung remembers in his autobiography, in his memoirs, a very beautiful and funny +incident. He came to India and went to see Konark, and in the temple of Konark there are +many, many Shivalingas, many phallic symbols. The pundit who was taking him around +explained everything to him except the Shivalingas. And they were so many, it was +difficult to escape this. Jung was well aware, but just to tease the pundit he went on + + + +asking, "But what are these?" So the pundit at last said into his ear, in Jung's ear, "Do not +ask me here, I will tell you afterwards. This is a private thing." + +Jung must have laughed inside — these are the Hindus of today. Then outside the temple +the pundit came near and said, "It was not good of you to ask before others. + +I will tell you now. It is a secret." And then again in Jung's ear he said, "They are our +private parts." + +When Jung went back, he met one great scholar — a scholar of oriental thought, +mythology, philosophy — Heinrich Zimmer. He related this anecdote to Zimmer. Zimmer +was one of the most gifted minds who ever tried to penetrate Indian thought and he was a +lover of India and of its ways of thinking — of the oriental non-logical, mystic approach +toward life. When he heard this from Jung, he laughed and said, "This is good for a +change. I have always heard about great Indians — Buddha, Krishna, Mahavir. What you +relate says something not about any great Indians, but about Indians." + +Love for Shiva is the great gate. And for him sex is not something to be condemned. For +him sex is the seed and love is the flowering of it, and if you condemn the seed you +condemn the flower. Sex can become love. If it never becomes love then it is crippled. +Condemn the crippledness, not the sex. Love must flower, sex must become love. If it is +not becoming it is not the fault of sex, it is your fault. + +Sex must not remain sex; that is the tantra teaching. It must be transfonned into love. + +And love also must not remain love. It must be transformed into light, into meditative +experience, into the last, ultimate mystic peak. How to transfonn love? Be the act and +forget the actor. + +While loving, be love — simply love. Then it is not your love or my love or anybody +else's — it is simply LOVE. When you are not there, when you are in the hands of the +ultimate source, or current, when you are in love, it is not you who is in love. When the +love has engulfed you, you have disappeared; you have just become a flowing energy. + +D. H. Lawrence, one of the most creative minds of this age, was knowingly or +unknowingly a tantra adept. He was condemned in the West completely, his books were +banned. There were many cases in the courts only because he had said, "Sex energy is the +only energy, and if you condemn it and suppress it you are against the universe. Then you +will never be capable of knowing the higher flowering of this energy. And when it is +suppressed it becomes ugly — this is the vicious circle." + +Priests, moralists, so-called religious people — popes, shankaracharyas and others — they +go on condemning sex. They say that this is an ugly thing. And when you suppress it, it +becomes ugly. So they say, "Look! What we said is true. It is proved by you. Look! +Whatsoever you are doing is ugly and you know it is ugly." + +But it is not sex which is ugly, it is these priests who have made it ugly. Once they have +made it ugly they are proved right. And when they are proved right you go on making it +more and more ugly. + +Sex is innocent energy — life flowing in you, existence alive in you. + +Do not cripple it! Allow it to move toward the heights. That is, sex must become love. +What is the difference? When your mind is sexual you are exploiting the other; the other +is just an instrument to be used and thrown away. When sex becomes love the other is not +an instrument, the other is not to be exploited; the other is not really the other. When you +love, it is not self-centered. Rather, the other becomes significant, unique. + + + +It is not that you are exploiting him — no! On the contrary, you both are joined in a deep +experience. You are partners of a deep experience, not the exploiter and the exploited. +You are helping each other to move into a different world of love. Sex is exploitation. +Love is moving together into a different world. + +If this moving is not momentary and if this moving becomes meditative — that is, if you +can forget yourself completely and the lover and the beloved disappear, and there is only +love flowing — then, says Shiva, everlasting life is yours. + +The second technique: + +STOP THE DOORS OF THE SENSES WHEN FEELING THE CREEPING OF AN +ANT. THEN. + +This looks very simple, but it is not so simple. I will read it again: STOP THE DOORS +OF THE SENSES WHEN FEELING THE CREEPING OF AN ANT. THEN. This is +only an example; anything will do. STOP THE DOORS OF THE SENSES WHEN +FEELING THE CREEPING OF AN ANT, and then - THEN - the thing will happen. + +What is Shiva saying? + +You have a thorn in your foot — it is painful, you are suffering. Or one ant is there +creeping on your leg. You feel the creeping and suddenly you want it to be thrown away. +Take any experience! You have a wound — it is painful. You have a headache, or any +pain in the body. Anything will do as an object. It is only an example — the CREEPING +OF AN ANT. Shiva says: STOP THE DOORS OF THE SENSES WHEN FEELING +THE CREEPING OF AN ANT. Whatsoever you are feeling, stop all the doors of the +senses. + +What is to be done? Close your eyes and think that you are just blind and you cannot see. +Close your ears and think that you cannot hear. With all of the five senses, you just close +them. How can you close them? It is easy. Stop breathing for a single moment: all your +senses will be closed. When the breath has stopped and all the senses are closed, where is +this creeping? Where is the ant? Suddenly you are removed — far away. + +One of my friends, an old friend, very aged, fell down the staircase, and doctors said that +now he would not be able to move from his bed for three months, he would have to rest +for three months. And he was a very restless man; it was difficult for him. I went to see +him, so he said, "Pray for me and bless me so that I may die, because these three months +are more than death. I cannot remain stone-like. And others are saying, 'Don’t move.’ + + +I told him, "This is a good opportunity. Just close your eyes and think that you are only a +stone, you cannot move. How can you move? You are a stone — just a stone, a statue. +Close your eyes. Feel that you are now a stone, a statue." He asked me what will happen. +I told him, "Just try. I am sitting here, and nothing can be done. Nothing can be done! + +You will have to be here for three months anyhow, so try." + +He would have never tried, but the situation was so impossible that he said, "Okay! I will +try because something may happen. But I don’t believe it," he said. "I don’t believe that +something can happen just by thinking that I am stone-like, dead like a statue, but I will +try." So he tried. + +I was also not thinking that something was going to happen, because the man was such. +But sometimes when you are in an impossible situation, hopeless, things begin to happen. +He closed his eyes. I waited, because I was thinking that within two or three minutes he + + + +would open them and he would say, "Nothing happened." But he would not open his +eyes, and thirty minutes passed. I could feel and see that he had become a statue. All the +tension on his forehead disappeared. His face was changed. + +I had to leave, but he would not open his eyes. And he was so silent, as if dead. His +breathing calmed down, and because I had to leave, I had to tell him, "I want to go now, +so please open your eyes and tell me what has happened." + + +He opened his eyes a different man. And he said, "This is a miracle. What have you done +to me?" + +I told him, "I have not done anything at all." + +He said, "You must have done something because this is a miracle. When I began to +think that I am just like a stone, like a statue, suddenly the feeling came to me that even if +I wanted to move my hands it was impossible to do so. I wanted so many times to open +my eyes, but they were like stone so I couldn’t open them." + +He said, "I even became worried about what you will be thinking, as it was so long, but +what could I do? I couldn’t move myself for these thirty minutes. And when every +movement ceased, suddenly the world disappeared and I was alone, deep down in me, +myself. Then the pain disappeared." + +There was severe pain; he could not sleep in the night without a tranquilizer. But the pain +disappeared. I asked him how he felt when the pain was disappearing. He said, "First I +began to feel that it was somewhere distant. The pain was there, but very far away as if +happening to someone else. And then by and by, by and by, as if someone is going away +and away and you cannot see him, it disappeared. The pain disappeared! For at least ten +minutes, the pain was no more. How can a stone body have pain?" + +This sutra says, STOP THE DOORS OF THE SENSES. Become stone-like, closed to the +world. When you are closed to the world, really, you are closed to your own body also, +because your body is not part of you; it is part of the world. + +When you are closed completely to the world, you are closed to your own body also. +Then, Shiva says, then the thing will happen. + +So try it with the body. Anything will do, you will not need some ant creeping on you. +Otherwise you will think, "When the ant will creep, I will meditate." And such helpful +ants are difficult to find, so anything will do. You are lying on your bed, you feel the cold +sheets — become dead. Suddenly the sheets will go away, away, away, and they will +disappear. Your bed will disappear; your bedroom will disappear; the whole world will +disappear. You are closed, dead, a stone, like a Leibnitzian monad with no window +outside — no window! You cannot move! + +And then, when you cannot move, you are thrown back to yourself, you are centered in +yourself. Then, for the first time you can look from your center. And once you can look +from your center, you can never be the same man again. + +The third technique: WHEN ON A BED OR A SEAT, LET YOURSELF BECOME +WEIGHTLESS, BEYOND MIND. You are sitting here. Just feel that you have become +weightless, there is no weight. You will feel that somewhere or other there is weight, but +go on feeling the weightlessness. It comes. A moment comes when you feel that you are +weightless, that there is no weight. When there is no weight you are no more a body, +because the weight is of the body — not of you. + + + +You are weightless. + +That is why there were so many experiments done. Someone is dying... many scientists +all over the world have tried to weigh the person. If there is a slight difference, if when a +man is alive the weight is more and when a man is dead the weight is less, then scientists +can say that something has moved from the body, that a soul or the self or something that +was there is no more — because for science nothing can be weightless, nothing! + +Weight is basic to all matter. Even sunrays have weight. It is very, very slight, minute, +and they are difficult to weigh, but scientists have weighed them. If you can collect all +the sunrays on a five-square-mile plot of ground, their weight will be similar to that of a +hair. But sunrays do have weight; they have been weighed. Nothing can be weightless for +science. And if something can be weightless then it is immaterial, it cannot be matter. +And science has believed for these twenty or twenty-five years that there is nothing +except matter. + +So when a man dies, if something leaves the body the weight must differ. But it never +differs; the weight remains the same. Sometimes it even becomes more — that is the +problem. The alive man weighs less; the dead man becomes more weighty. That created +new problems, because they were really trying to find out if some weight is lost; then +they can say something has left. + +But it seems that, on the contrary, something has come in. What has happened? Weight is +material, but you are not a weight. You are immaterial. + +If you try this technique of weightlessness, you just have to conceive of yourself as +weightless — and not only conceive, but feel that your body has become weightless. If +you go on feeling, feeling, feeling, a moment comes when suddenly you realize that you +are weightless. You are already, so you can realize it anytime. You have only to create a +situation in which you can feel again that you are weightless. + +You have to dehypnotize yourself. This is the hypnosis, the belief that "I am a body and +that is why I feel weight." If you can dehypnotize yourself into realizing that you are not +a body, you will not feel weight. And when you do not feel weight you are beyond mind, +says Shiva: WHEN ON A BED OR A SEAT, LET YOURSELF BECOME +WEIGHTLESS, BEYOND MIND. Then the thing can happen. The mind also has +weight; everyone's mind has a different weight. + +At one time there were some proposals that the weightier the mind, the more intelligent. +And generally it is true, but not absolutely, because sometimes very great men had very +small minds, and sometimes some stupid idiot's mind weighed very much. But generally +it is true, because when you have a bigger mechanism of the mind it weighs more. The +mind is also a weight, but your consciousness is weightless. + +To feel this consciousness, you have to feel weightlessness. So try it: walking, sitting, +sleeping, you can try it. + +Some observations.... Why does the dead body become more weighty sometimes? +Because the moment the consciousness leaves the body, the body becomes unprotected. +Many things can enter it immediately. They were not entering because of you. Many +vibrations can enter into a dead body — they cannot enter into you. You are there, the +body is alive, resistant to many things. That is why once you are ill, it begins to be a long +sequence; one illness, then another, and then another — because once you are ill you +become unprotected, vulnerable, non-resistant. Then anything can enter into you. Your +presence protects the body. So sometimes a dead body can gain weight. The moment you + + + +leave it, anything can enter into the body. + +Secondly, when you are happy you always feel weightless; when you are sad you always +feel more weight, as if something is pulling you down. The gravitation becomes much +more. When you are sad, you are more weighty. When you are happy, you are light. You +feel it. Why? Because when you are happy, whenever you feel a blissful moment, you +forget the body completely. When you are sad, suffering, you cannot forget the body, you +feel the weight of it. It pulls you down — down to the earth, as if you are rooted. Then +you cannot move; you have roots in the earth. + +In happiness you are weightless. In sorrow, sadness, you become weighty. + +In deep meditation, when you forget your body completely, you can levitate. Even the +body can go up with you. It happens many times. Scientists have been observing one +woman in Bolivia. While meditating she goes up four feet, and now it has been observed +scientifically; many films have been taken, many photographs. Before thousands and +thousands of observers suddenly the woman goes up and gravity becomes nil, nullified. +As of yet there is no explanation for what is happening, but that same woman cannot go +up while not in meditation. And if her meditation is disturbed, suddenly she falls down. +What happens? Deep in meditation you forget your body completely, and the +identification is broken. The body is a very small thing; you are very big, you have +infinite power. The body has nothing in comparison to you. + +It is as if an emperor has become identified with his slave, so as the slave goes begging, +the emperor goes begging; as the slave weeps, the emperor weeps. When the slave says, + +"I am no one," the emperor says, "I am no one." Once the emperor recognizes his own +being, once he recognizes that he is the emperor and this man is just a slave, everything +will change suddenly. + +You are infinite power identified with a very finite body. Once you realize your self, then +weightlessness becomes more and the weight of the body less. + +Then you can levitate, the body can go up. + +There are many, many stories which cannot yet be proven scientifically, but they will be +proven... because if one woman can go up four feet, then there is no barrier. Another can +go a thousand feet, another can go completely into the cosmos. Theoretically there is no +problem: four feet or four hundred feet or four thousand feet, it makes no difference. +There are stories about Ram and about many others who have disappeared completely +with the body. Their bodies were never found dead on this earth. Mohammed disappeared +completely — not only with his body; it is said he disappeared with his horse also. These +stories look impossible, they look mythological, but they are not necessarily so. + +Once you know the weightless force, you have become the master of gravity. You can +use it; it depends on you. You can disappear completely with your body. + +But to us weightlessness will be a problem. The technique of SIDDHASAN, the way +Buddha sits, is the best way to be weightless. Sit on the earth — not on any chair or +anything, but just on the floor. And it is good if the floor is not of cement or anything +artificial. Just sit on the ground so that you are the nearest to nature. It is good if you can +sit naked. Just sit naked on the ground in the Buddha posture, siddhasan — because +siddhasan is the best posture in which to be weightless. + +Why? Because you feel more weight if your body is leaning this way or that way. Then +your body has more area to be affected by gravity. If I am sitting on this chair then a + + + +greater area of my body is affected by gravity. + +While you are standing less area is affected, but you cannot stand for too long. Mahavir +always meditated standing — always, because then one covers the least area. Just your +feet are touching the ground. When you are standing on your feet, straight, the least +amount of gravity works on you — and gravity is weight. + +Sitting in a Buddha posture, locked — your legs are locked, your hands are locked — also +helps, because then your inner electricity becomes a circuit. Let your spine be straight. +Now you can understand why so much emphasis has been given to a straight spine, +because with a straight spine less and less area is covered, so gravity affects you less. +With closed eyes, balance yourself completely, center yourself. Lean to the right and feel +the gravity; lean to the left and feel the gravity; lean forward and feel the gravity; lean +backward and feel the gravity. Then find the center where the least pull of gravity is felt, +the least weight is felt, and remain there. Then forget the body and feel that you are not +weight — you are weightless. Then go on feeling this weightlessness. Suddenly you +become weightless; suddenly you are not the body; suddenly you are in a different world +of bodilessness. + + +Weightlessness is bodilessness. Then you transcend mind also. Mind is also part of the +body, part of matter. Matter has weight; you do not have any weight. This is the basis of +this technique. + +Try any technique, but stick to it for a few days so that you can feel whether it is working +or not. + +Enough for today. + + +THE END. + + + +Chapter 8: Total acceptance and non-division + + +Question 1 + +WHAT DOES TANTRA MEAN BY PURITY? + +One of the things being asked about is: WHAT DOES TANTRA MEAN BY +PURIFICATION OF THE MIND, PURITY OF THE MIND, AS A BASIC +CONDITION TO FURTHER PROGRESS? Whatsoever is ordinarily meant by purity is +not what is meant by tantra. Ordinarily, we divide everything into bad and good. The +division may be for any reason. It may be hygienically, morally or in any other way, but +we divide life into two — good and bad. And ordinarily, whenever we say purity we mean +goodness — the "bad" qualities should not be allowed and the "good" qualities should be +there. But for tantra this division of good and bad is meaningless. Tantra does not look at +life through any dichotomy, any duality, any division. Then "What is meant by purity in +tantra?" is a very relevant question. + +If you ask a saint, he will say that anger is bad, sex is bad, greed is bad. If you ask +Gurdjieff, he will say that negativity is bad, that whatsoever emotion is negative is bad +and to be positive is good. If you ask Jains, Buddhists, Hindus, Christians or +Mohammedans, they may differ in their definition of good and bad — but they have +definitions. They call certain things bad and certain things good. So to define purity is not +difficult for them. Whatsoever they take as good is pure, whatsoever they take as bad is +impure. + +But for tantra it is a deep problem. + +Tantra makes no superficial division between good and bad. Then what is purity? Tantra +says that to divide is impure and to live in non-division is purity. So for tantra purity +means innocence — undifferentiated innocence. + +A child is there; you call him pure. He gets angry, he has greed, so why do you call him +pure? What is pure in childhood? Innocence! There is no division in the mind of a child. +The child is unaware of any division into what is good and what is bad. That +unawareness is the innocence. Even if he gets angry, he has no mind to be angry, it is a +pure and simple act. It happens, and when anger goes, it goes. Nothing is left behind. The +child is again the same, as if the anger has never been there. The purity is not touched; +the purity is the same. So a child is pure because there is no mind. + +The more mind grows, the more the child will become impure. Then anger will be there +as a considered thing, not spontaneously. Then sometimes the child will suppress the +anger — if the situation does not permit it. And when anger becomes suppressed, then +sometimes it will be transferred onto another situation instead. When there is really no +need to be angry he will get angry, because the suppressed anger will need some outlet. +Then everything will become impure because the mind has come in. + +A child can be a thief in our eyes, but a child himself is never a thief because the very +concept that things belong to individuals doesn’t exist in his mind. + +If he takes your watch, your money, or anything, it is not a theft for him because the very +notion that things belong to someone is non-existent. His theft is pure while even your +non-theft is not pure — the mind is there. + +Tantra says that when someone becomes again like a child, he is pure. Of course, he is + + + +not a child — only like a child. The difference is there and the similarity is there. The +similarity is the innocence regained. Again someone is like a child. A child is standing +naked — no one feels the nakedness because a child is still unaware of the body. His +nakedness has a quality different from your nakedness. You are aware of the body. + +The sage must regain this innocence. Mahavir stands again naked. That nakedness again +has the same quality of innocence. He has forgotten his body; he is no longer the body. +But one difference is also there, and the difference is great: the child is simply ignorant, +hence the innocence. But the sage is wise, that is the reason for his innocence. + +The child will one day become aware of his body and will feel the nakedness. He will try +to hide, he will become guilty, and he will feel shame. He will come to be aware. So his +innocence is an innocence of ignorance. Knowledge will destroy it. + +That is the meaning of the biblical story of Adam and Eve being expelled from the +garden of Eden. They were naked like children. + +They were not aware of the body; they were not aware of anger, greed, lust, sex or +anything. They were unaware. They were like children, innocent. + +But God had forbidden them to eat the fruit of the tree of knowledge. The tree of +knowledge was forbidden but they ate, because anything forbidden becomes inviting. +Anything forbidden becomes attractive! They were living in a big garden with an infinite +number of trees, but the tree of knowledge became the most important and significant +because it was forbidden. Really, this forbidden-ness became the attraction, the +invitation. They were as if magnetized, hypnotized by the tree. They couldn’t escape it, +they had to eat. + +But this story is beautiful because the tree is named the tree of knowledge. The moeent +they ate the fruit of knowledge they became non-innocent. They became aware; they +came to realize that they were naked. Immediately, Eve tried to hide her body. With +awareness of the body they became aware of everything — anger, lust, greed, everything. +They became adult, so they were expelled from the garden. + +So in the Bible knowledge is sin. They were thrown out of the garden, they were +punished, because of knowledge. Unless they become again like children — innocent, +not-knowing — they cannot enter the garden. They can enter the kingdom of God again +only if they fulfill this condition of becoming innocent again. + + +The whole thing is just the story of humanity. Every child is expelled from the garden, +not only Adam and Eve. Every child lives his childhood in innocence without knowing +anything. He is pure, but the purity is of ignorance. It cannot continue. Unless it becomes +a purity of wisdom, you cannot rely on it. It will have to go, sooner or later you will have +to eat the fruit of knowledge. + +Each child will have to eat the fruit of knowledge. It was easy in the garden of Eden — +just the tree was there. As a substitute for the tree we have schools, colleges and +universities. Each child will have to pass, will have to become non-innocent, will have to +lose his innocence. The very world needs knowledge, the very existence needs +knowledge. You cannot exist in it without knowledge. And the moment knowledge +comes, division enters. You begin to divide between what is good and what is bad. + +So for tantra the division into good and bad is impurity. Before it you are pure, after it +you are pure; in it you are impure. But knowledge is a necessary evil, you cannot escape +it. One has to go through it; that is part of life. But one need not remain in it always, one + + + +can transcend it. Transcendence makes you again pure and innocent. If divisions lost +their meaning, if the knowledge which differentiates between good and evil were no +more, you would again look at the world from an innocent attitude. + + +Jesus says, "Unless you become like children, you cannot enter into my kingdom of +God." Unless you become like children... this is the purity of tantra. + +Lao Tsu says, "One inch of division, and heaven and hell are set apart." No-division is +the mind of the sage — no division at all! A sage doesn't know what is good or what is +bad. He is like children but unlike them also, because he has known this division. He has +passed through this division and transcended it; he has gone beyond it. He has known +darkness and light, but now he has gone beyond it. Now he sees darkness as part of light +and light as part of darkness, now there is no division. Light and darkness have both +become one — degrees of one phenomenon. Now he sees everything as degrees of one; +howsoever polar opposite they are, they are not two. Life and death, love and hate, good +and bad, everything is part of one phenomenon, one energy. The difference is only of +degrees, and they can never be divided. It cannot be demarked, that "From this point +there is division." There is no division. + +What is good? What is bad? From where can you define them and demark them as +separate? They are always one. They are only different degrees of the same thing. Once +this is known and felt, your mind becomes again pure. This is the purity meant by tantra. +So I will define tantric purity as innocence, not as goodness. + + +But innocence can be ignorant — then it is of no use. It has to be lost, you have to be +thrown out of it; otherwise you cannot mature. Giving up knowledge and transcendence +of knowledge are both part of maturing, part of being really adult. So go through it, but +do not remain there. Move! Go on moving! A day comes when you are beyond it. + +That is why tantric purity is difficult to understand and can be misunderstood. It is +delicate! So to recognize a tantric sage is virtually impossible. Ordinary saints and sages +can be recognized because they follow you — your standards, your definitions, your +morality. A tantric sage is even difficult to recognize because he transcends all divisions. +So really, in the whole history of human growth we know nothing about tantric sages. +Nothing is mentioned or recorded about them because it is so difficult to recognize them. +Confucius went to Lao Tsu. Lao Tsu's mind is that of a tantrically awakened sage. He +never knew about the word 'tantra'; the word is meaningless for him. He never knew +anything about tantra, but whatsoever he has said IS tantra. Confucius is representative of +our mind, he is the arch-representative. He continually thinks in tenns of good and bad, +of what should be done and what should not be done. He is a legalist — the greatest +legalist ever born. He went to see Lao Tsu, and he asked Lao Tsu, "What is good? What +ought one to do? What is bad? Define it clearly." + + +Lao Tsu said, "Definitions create a mess, because defining means dividing: this is this, +and that is that." You divide and say A is A and B is B... you have divided. You say A +cannot be B; then you have created a division, a dichotomy, and the existence is one. A is +always becoming B, A is always moving into B. Life is always becoming death, life is +always moving into death, so how can you define? Childhood is moving into youth and + + + +youth is moving into old age; health is moving into disease and disease is moving into +health. So where can you demark them as separate? + +Life is one movement, and the moment you define you create a mess, because definitions +will be dead and life is an alive movement. So definitions are always false. Lao Tsu said, +"Defining creates non-truth, so do not define. Do not say what is good and what is bad." +So Confucius said, "What are you saying? Then how can people be led and guided? Then +how can they be taught? How can they be made moral and good?" + +Lao Tsu said, "When someone tries to make someone else good, that is a sin in my eyes. +Who are you to lead? Who are you to guide? And the more guides there are, the more +confusion. Leave everyone to himself. Who are you?" + +This type of attitude seems dangerous. It is! Society cannot be founded on such attitudes. +Confucius goes on asking, and the whole point is that Lao Tsu says, "Nature is enough, +no morality is needed. + +Nature is spontaneous. Nature is enough, no imposed laws and disciplines are needed. +Innocence is enough; no morality is needed. Nature is spontaneous, nature is enough. No +imposed laws and disciplines are needed. Innocence is enough. Knowledge is not +needed." + +Confucius came back very much disturbed. He could not sleep for nights. And his +disciples asked, "Tell us something about the meeting. What happened?" Confucius +answered, "He is not a man, he is a danger, a dragon. He is not a man. Never go to that +place where he is. Whenever you hear about Lao Tsu, just escape from that place. He will +disturb your mind completely." + +And that is right, because the whole of tantra is concerned with how to transcend the +mind. It is bound to destroy the mind. Mind lives with definitions, laws and disciplines; +mind is an order. But remember, tantra is not disorder, and that is a very subtle point to +be understood. + +Confucius could not understand Lao Tsu. When Confucius left, Lao Tsu was laughing +and laughing and so his disciples asked, "Why are you laughing so much? What has +happened?" + +Lao Tsu is reported to have said, "The mind is such a barrier to understanding. Even the +mind of a Confucius is a barrier. He could not understand me at all, and whatsoever he +will say about me will be a misunderstanding. He thinks he is going to create order in the +world. You CANNOT create order in the world. + +Order is inherent in it; it is always there. When you try to create order you create +disorder." Lao Tsu said, "He will think that I am creating disorder, and really, he is the +one who is creating disorder. I am against all imposed orders because I believe in a +spontaneous discipline which comes and grows automatically. You need not impose it." +Tantra looks at things in this way. For tantra, innocence is spontaneity, SAHAJATA — to +be oneself without any imposition, to be simply oneself, growing like a tree. Not the tree +of your garden, but the tree of your forest, growing spontaneously; not guided, because +every guidance is a misguidance. For tantra, every guidance is a misguidance. Not +guided, not guarded, not directed, not motivated, but simply growing. + +The inner law is enough; no other law is needed. And if you need some other law, it only +shows that you do not know the inner law, you have lost contact with it. So the real thing +is not something imposed. The real thing is again regaining the balance, again moving to +the center, again returning to the home so that you gain the real inner law. + + + +But for morality, for religions — so-called religions — order is to be imposed, goodness is +to be imposed from above, from without. Religions, moral teachings, priests, popes, they +all take you as inherently bad — remember this. They do not believe in the goodness of +man; they do not believe in any inner goodness. + +They believe that you are evil, that unless you are taught to be good you cannot be good; +unless goodness is forced from without, there is no possibility of it coming from within. +So for priests, for religious people, for moralists, you are naturally bad. Goodness is +going to be a discipline imposed from without. You are a chaos and order has to be +brought in by them; they will bring the order. And they have made the whole world a +mess, a confusion, a madhouse, because they have been ordering for centuries and +centuries, disciplining for centuries and centuries. They have taught so much that the +taught ones have gone mad. + +Tantra believes in your inner goodness: remember this difference. Tantra says that +everyone is bom good, that goodness is your nature. It is the case! You are already good! +You need a natural growth, you do not need any imposition; that is why nothing is taken +as bad. If anger is there, if sex is there, if greed is there, tantra says they are also good. +The only thing lacking is that you are not centered in yourself; that is why you cannot use +them. + +Anger is not bad. Really, the problem is that you are not inside, that is why anger creates +havoc. If you are present there inside, anger becomes a healthy energy, anger becomes +health. Anger is transfonned into energy, it becomes good. Whatsoever is there is good. +Tantra believes in the inherent goodness of everything. + +Everything is holy, nothing is unholy and nothing is evil. For tantra there is no devil, only +divine existence. + +Religions cannot exist without the devil. They need a God and they need a devil also. So +do not be misguided if you see only a God in their temples. Just behind that God, the +devil is hiding, because no religion can exist without the devil. + +Something has to be condemned, something has to be fought, something has to be +destroyed. The total is not accepted, only part. This is very basic. You are not accepted +totally by any religion, only partially. They say, "We accept your love, but not your hate. +Destroy hate." And this is a very deep problem, because when you destroy hate +completely love is also destroyed — because they are not two. They say, "We accept your +silence, but we do not accept your anger." Destroy anger and your aliveness is destroyed. +Then you will be silent, but not an alive man — only a dead one. That silence is not life, it +is just death. + +Religions always divide you into two: the evil and the divine. They accept the divine and +are against the evil — the evil has to be destroyed. So if someone really follows them, he +will come to conclude that the moment you destroy the devil, God is destroyed. But no +one really follows them — no one can follow them because the very teaching is absurd. + +So what is everyone doing? Everyone is just deceiving. + +That is why there is so much hypocrisy. That hypocrisy has been created by religion. You +cannot do whatsoever they are teaching you to do, so you become a hypocrite. If you +follow them you will die; if you do not follow them you feel guilty that you are +irreligious. So what to do? + +The cunning mind makes a compromise. It goes on paying lip service to them, saying, "I + + + +am following you," but it goes on doing whatsoever it wants to do. You continue your +anger, you continue your sex, you continue your greed, but you go on saying that greed is +bad, anger is bad, sex is bad — that it is a sin. This is hypocrisy. The whole world has +become hypocritical, no man is honest. Unless these dividing religions disappear, no man +can be honest. This will look contradictory because all the religions are teaching to be +honest, but they are the foundation stones of all dishonesty. They make you dishonest; +because they teach you to do impossible things, which you cannot do, you become +hypocrites. + +Tantra accepts you in your totality, in your wholeness, because tantra says, either accept +wholly or reject wholly; there is no in between. A man is a whole, an organic whole. You +cannot divide it. You cannot say, "We will not accept this," because that which you reject +is organically joined to that which you accept. + +It is like this.... My body is there. Someone comes and says, "We accept your blood +circulation, but we do not accept the noise of your heart. + +This continuous beating of your heart we do not accept. We accept your blood +circulation. It is okay, it is silent." But my blood circulation is through my heart, and the +beating is basically related with blood circulation; it happens because of it. So what am I +to do? My heart and my blood circulation are an organic unity. They are not two things, +they are one. + +So either accept me totally or reject me totally, but do not try to divide me because then +you will create a dishonesty, a deep dishonesty. If you go on condemning my heartbeat, +then I will also start condemning my heartbeat. But the blood won't be able to circulate +and I cannot be alive without it. So what to do? Go on as you are, and go on all the time +saying something else which you are not, which you cannot be. + +It is not difficult to see how heart and blood circulation are related, but it is difficult to +see how love and hate are related. They are one. When you love someone, what are you +doing? It is one movement, like breath going out. When you love someone, what are you +doing? You are going out to meet him, it is a breath going out. When you hate someone, +it is a breath coming back in. + +When you love, you are attracted to someone. When you hate, you are repelled. + +Attraction and repulsion are two waves of one movement. Attraction and repulsion are +not two things; you cannot divide them. You cannot say, "You can breathe in but you +cannot breathe out, or you can breathe out but you cannot breathe in. + +You are allowed only one thing. Either go on breathing out or go on breathing in, do not +do both." How can you breathe in if you are not allowed to breathe out? And if you are +not allowed to hate, you cannot love. + +Tantra says, "We accept the whole man because man is an organic unity." Man is a deep +unity; you cannot discard anything. And this is as it should be — because if man is not an +organic unity, then in this universe nothing can be an organic unity. Man is the peak of +organic wholeness. The stone lying on the street is a unity. The tree is a unity. The flower +and the bird are unities. Everything is a unity, so why not man? And man is the peak — a +great unity, a very complex organic whole. Really, you cannot deny anything. + +Tantra says, "We accept you as you are. That does not mean there is no need to change; +that does not mean that now you have to stop growing. Rather, on the contrary, it means +that we accept the basis of growth." Now you can grow, but this growth is not going to be +a choice. This growth is going to be a choiceless growth. + + + +Look! For example, when a buddha becomes enlightened we can ask, "Where has his +anger gone — where?" He had anger, he had sex, so where has his sex gone? Where is it +that his anger has gone? Where is his greed?" We cannot recognize any anger in him +now. When he is enlightened we cannot recognize any anger in him. + + +Can you recognize the mud in the lotus? The lotus comes from the mud. If you have +never seen a lotus growing from the mud and a lotus flower is brought to you, can you +conceive that this beautiful lotus flower has come up from the ordinary mud of a pond? +This beautiful lotus coming from ugly mud! Can you recognize the mud anywhere in it? +It is there, but transformed. Its fragrance is coming from that same ugly mud. The +rosiness of the petals is coming from the same ugly mud. If you hide this lotus flower in +mud, within days it will disappear again into its mother. Then again you won’t be able to +recognize where that lotus has gone. Where? Where is the fragrance? Where are those +beautiful petals? + +You cannot recognize yourself in Buddha, but you are there — of course, on a greater and +higher plane, transfonned. The sex is there, the anger is there, the hate is there. +Everything which belongs to man is there. Buddha is a man, but he has come to his +ultimate growth. He has become a lotus flower; you cannot recognize the mud, but that +doesn’t mean that the mud is not there. It is there, but not as mud. It is a higher unity. + +That is why in Buddha you can feel neither hate nor love. That is still more difficult to +understand because Buddha appears totally loving — never hating, always silent — never +angry. But his silence is different from your silence. It cannot be the same. + + +What is your silence? Somewhere Einstein has said that our peace is nothing but a +preparation for war. Between two wars we have a gap of peace, but that peace is not +really peace. It is only the gap between two wars, so it becomes a cold war. Thus, we +have two types of war — hot and cold. + +After the second world war, Russia and America began a cold war. They are not at peace +— just in preparation for another war. They are getting ready. Each war disturbs, destroys. +You have to get ready again, so you need a gap, an interval. But if wars really disappear +from the world completely, then this type of peace which means cold war will also +disappear, because it always happens between two wars. If war disappears completely, +this cold war which we call peace cannot continue. + +What is your silence? Just a preparation between two angers. When you seem at ease +what is it? Are you really relaxed, really at ease, or are you just preparing for another +outburst, for another explosion? Anger is a wastage of energy, so you also need time. +When you get angry you cannot get angry again immediately. When you move into the +sex act, you cannot move again immediately. You will need time, so you will need a +period of BRAHMACHARYA — celibacy — for at least two or three days. It will depend +on your age. This celibacy is not really celibacy, you are only preparing again. + +Between two sex acts there can be no brahmacharya. + +You go on calling the period between two meals a fast. That is why in the morning you +have 'breakfast', but where is the fast? You were just preparing. You cannot go on +thrusting food into yourself continuously, you have to have a gap, but that gap is not a +fast. Really, it is only a preparation for another meal, not a fast. + + + +So when we are silent, it is always between two angers. When we are at ease, it is always +between two peaks of tension. When we are celibate, it is only between two sex acts. +When we are loving, it is always between two hatreds — remember this. + +So when Buddha is silent, do not think this is your silence. When your anger has +disappeared, your silence has disappeared also. They both exist together; they cannot be +separated. So when Buddha is a brahmachari — a celibate — do not think this is your +celibacy. When sex has disappeared, brahmacharya has also disappeared. They both were +part of one thing, so they both have disappeared. With a Buddha a very different being is +there such as you cannot conceive. You can only conceive of the dichotomy you know. +You cannot conceive of what type of man this is, of what has happened to him. + +The whole energy has come to a different level, a different plane of existence. The mud +has become a lotus, but it is still there. The mud has not been discarded from the lotus; it +has been transformed. + +So all of the energies within you are accepted by tantra. + +Tantra is not for discarding anything whatsoever, but for transformation. And tantra says +that the first step is to accept. The first step is very difficult — to accept. You may be +getting angry many times every day, but to accept your anger is very difficult. To be +angry is very easy; to accept your anger is very difficult. Why? Y ou do not feel so much +difficulty in being angry, so why do you feel so much difficulty in accepting it? Getting +angry seems not so bad as accepting it. Everyone thinks he is a good man and anger is +just momentary, it comes and goes. It doesn’t destroy your self-image. You go on +remaining good. You say that "It just happened." It is not destructive to your ego. + +So those who are cunning will repent immediately. They will get angry and they will +repent, they will ask for forgiveness. These are the cunning ones. Why do I call them +cunning? Because their anger gives a trembling to their self-image. They begin to feel +uneasy. They begin to feel, "I get angry? I am so bad that I get angry?" So the image of a +good man trembles. He has to try and make it established again. Immediately he says, +"This was bad. I will never do it again. Forgive me." By asking for forgiveness his self- +image is established again. He is okay — back to his previous state when there was no +anger. He has canceled his anger by asking for forgiveness. He has called himself bad +just to remain good. + + +That is why you can go on for lives together being angry, being sexual, being possessive, +being this and that, but never accepting. This is a trick of the mind. Whatsoever you do is +just on the periphery. In the center, you remain good. If you accept that "I have anger," in +the center you become bad. Then it is not just a question of getting angry, then it is not +momentary. Rather, then anger is part of your constitution. Then it is not that someone +irritates you into anger. Even if you are alone, the anger is there. When you are not +getting angry the anger is still there, because anger is your energy, part of you. + +It is not that sometimes it flares up and then goes off — no! It cannot flare up if it is not +always present. You can turn off this light, you can turn on this light; but the current must +remain continuously there. If the current is not there, you cannot turn it on and off. The +current, the anger current, is always there; the sex current is always there, the greed +current is always there. You can turn it on, you can turn it off. In situations you change, +but inwardly you remain the same. + +Accepting means anger is not an act. Rather, YOU are anger. Sex is not just an act; YOU + + + +are sex. Greed is not just an act; YOU are greed. Accepting this means throwing away the +self-image. And we all have built beautiful self-images. Everyone has built a beautiful +self-image — absolutely beautiful. + +And whatsoever you are doing never touches it, you go on protecting it. The image is +protected, so you feel good. That is why you can become angry, you can become sexual, +and you are not disturbed. But if you accept and say, "I am sex, I am anger, I am greed," +then your self-image falls down immediately. + +Tantra says this is the first step, and the most difficult: to accept whatsoever you are. +Sometimes we try to accept, but whenever we accept we again do so in a very calculated +way. Our cunningness is deep and subtle, and mind has very subtle ways to deceive. +Sometimes you accept and say, "Yes, I am angry." But if you accept this, you accept only +when you thi nk of how to transcend anger. Then you accept and say, "Okay, I am angry. +Now tell me how to go beyond it." You accept sex only to be non-sexual. Whenever you +are trying to be something else you are able to accept, because your self-image is again +maintained by the future. + +You are violent and you are striving to be nonviolent, so you accept and say, "Okay, I am +violent. Today I am violent, but tomorrow I will be nonviolent, however." How will you +become nonviolent? You postpone this self-image into the future. You do not think of +yourself in the present. You always think in terms of the ideal — of nonviolence, love and +compassion. Then you are in the future. This present is just to become a past, your real +self is in the future, so you go on identifying yourself with ideals. + +Those ideals are also ways of not accepting the reality. You are violent — that is the case. +And the present is the only thing that is existential; the future is not. Your ideals are just +dreams. They are tricks to postpone the mind, to focus the mind somewhere else. + +You are violent: this is the case, so accept it. And do not try to be nonviolent. A violent +mind CANNOT become nonviolent. How is this possible? Look deep into it. You are +violent, so how can you be nonviolent? Whatsoever you do will be done by the violent +mind — whatsoever! Even while striving to be nonviolent, the effort will be done by the +violent mind. You are violent, so by trying to be nonviolent you will be violent. In the +very effort to be nonviolent, you will try every type of violence. + +That is why you go to these strivers for nonviolence. They may not be violent with +others, but they are with themselves. They are very violent with themselves — murdering +themselves. And the more they get mad against themselves, the more they are celebrated. +When they become completely mad, suicidal, then the society says, "These are the +sages." But they have only transfonned the object of violence, nothing else. They were +violent with someone else, now they are violent with themselves — but the violence is +there. And when you are violent with someone else the law can protect, the court can +help, the society will condemn you. + +But when you are violent against yourself there is no law. No law can protect you against +yourself. + +When man is against himself there is no protection, nothing can be done. And no one +cares because it is your business. No one else is involved in it: it is your business. So- +called monks, so-called saints, they are violent against themselves. No one is interested. +They say, "Okay! Go on doing it. It is your business." + +If your mind is one of greed, how can you be non-greedy? The greedy mind will remain + + + +greedy. Whatsoever is done by it to go beyond greed is not going to help. Of course, we +can create new greeds. Ask a greedy mind, "What are you doing just accumulating +wealth? You will die and you cannot take your wealth with you." This is the logic of the +so-called religious preachers — that you cannot take your wealth with you. But if +someone could take it, then the whole logic would fail. + +The greedy man feels the logic, of course. He asks, "How can I take wealth with me?" + +But he really wants to take it. That is why the priest becomes influential. He shows him +that it is nonsense to accumulate things which cannot be taken beyond death. He says, "I +will teach you how to accumulate things which can be taken. Virtue can be taken, +PUNYA — good deeds — can be taken, goodness can be taken, but not wealth. So donate +the wealth." + +But this is an appeal to his greed. + +This is telling him, "Now we will give you better things which can be carried beyond +death." The appeal obtains results. The greedy man feels, "You are right. Death is there +and nothing can be done about it, so I must do something which can be carried beyond. I +must create some kind of bank balance in the other world also. The world, this bank +balance, cannot be with me forever." He goes on talking in these tenns. + +Go through the scriptures... they appeal to your greed. They say, "What are you doing +wasting your time in momentary pleasures?" The emphasis is on 'momentary'. So find +some eternal pleasures; then it is okay. They are not against pleasures, they are just +against their being momentary. Look at the greed! + +Sometimes it happens that you may find a non- greedy man who is enjoying momentary +pleasures, but you cannot find among your saints a man who is not asking, demanding for +eternal pleasures. The greed in them is even more. You can find a non-greedy man +among ordinary men, but you cannot find a non-greedy man among your so-called saints. +They also want pleasures, but they are more greedy than you. You are satisfied with +momentary pleasures and they are not. Their greed is bigger. Their greed can only be +satisfied with eternal pleasures. + +Infinite greed asks for infinite pleasures — remember this. A finite greed is satisfied with +finite pleasure. + +They will ask you, "What are you doing loving a woman? She is nothing but bones and +blood. Look deep into the woman you love. What is she?" They are not against the +woman, they are against the bones, against the blood, against the body. But if a woman is +of gold, then it is okay. They are asking for women of gold. + +They are not in this world, so they create another world. They say, "In heaven there are +golden damsels — APSARAS — who are beautiful and who never age." In the Hindu +heaven apsaras, the heavenly girls, remain always at sixteen. They never grow older, they +are always sixteen — never less, never more. So what are you doing wasting your time on +these ordinary women? Think of heaven. They are not against pleasure. Really, they are +against momentary pleasure. + +If, through some whim, God gives this world eternal pleasure, your whole edifice of +religion will fall down immediately; the whole appeal will be lost. If somehow bank +balances can be carried beyond death, no one will be interested in creating bank balances +in the other world. So death is a great help to the priests. + +A greedy man is always attracted by another greed. If you tell him and convince him that +his greed is the cause of his misery, and that if he leaves greed he will attain a blissful + + + +state, he may try — because now you are not really against his greed. You are giving his +greed new pastures. + +He can move into new dimensions of greed. + +So tantra says that a greedy mind cannot become non-greedy, a violent mind cannot +become nonviolent. But this seems very hopeless. If this is the case, then nothing can be +done. Then what does tantra stand for? If a greedy mind cannot become non-greedy, and +a violent mind nonviolent, and a sex-obsessed mind transfonned beyond sex, if nothing +can be done then what does tantra stand for? Tantra is not saying that nothing can be +done. Something can be done, but the dimension is completely different. + +A greedy mind has to understand that it is greedy and accept it — not try to be non- +greedy. The greedy mind has to go deep within itself to realize the depth of its greed. Not +moving away from it, but remaining with it; not moving in ideals — in contradictory +ideals, in opposite ideals — but remaining in the present, moving into the greed, knowing +the greed, understanding the greed, and not trying to escape from it in any way. If you +can remain with your greed, many things will happen. If you can remain with your greed, +with your sex, with your anger, your ego will dissolve. This will be the first thing — and +what a great miracle it is! + +Many people come to me and they go on asking how to be egoless. You cannot be +egoless unless you look at the foundations of your ego to find it. You are greedy and you +think you are non-greedy — this is the ego. + +If you are greedy and you know and accept totally that you are greedy, then where can +you allow your ego to stand? If you are angry and you say that you are angry — you do +not say it to others, but you feel it deep down, you feel the helplessness — then where can +your anger stand? If you are sexual, accept it. Whatsoever is there, accept it. + +The non-acceptance of nature creates the ego, the non-acceptance of your suchness — +your TATHATA, that which you are. If you accept it, the ego will not be there. If you do +not accept it, if you reject it, if you create ideals against it, there will be ego. Ideals are +the stuff the ego is made of. + +Accept yourself. But then you will look like an animal. You will not look like a man +because your concept of man is in your ideals. That is why we go on teaching others not +to be like animals, and everyone is an animal. What can you do? You ARE an animal. +Accept your animality. And the moment you accept your animality, you have done the +first thing to go beyond animals — because no animal knows that it is an animal, only +man can know. That is going beyond. You cannot go beyond by denying. + +Accept! When everything is accepted, suddenly you will feel that you have transcended. +Who is accepting? Who accepts the whole? That which accepts has gone beyond. If you +reject, you remain on the same plane. If you accept, you go beyond. + +Acceptance is transcendence. And if you accept yourself totally, suddenly you are thrown +to your center. Then you cannot move anywhere. You cannot move from your suchness, +from your nature, so you are thrown to your center. + +All these tantric techniques which we are discussing and trying to understand are +different ways of throwing you to your center, of throwing you from the periphery. And +you are trying to escape from the center in many ways. Ideals are good escapes. Idealists +are the most subtle of egoists. + +Many things happen.... You are violent and you create an ideal of nonviolence. Then you + + + +need not go into yourself, into your violence; there is no need. Then this is the only need +— to go on thinking about nonviolence, reading about nonviolence, and trying to practice +nonviolence. You say to yourself, "Do not touch violence," and you are violent. So you +can escape from yourself, you can go to the periphery, but then you will never come to +the center. That is one thing. + +Secondly, when you create the ideal of nonviolence, you can condemn others. Now it +becomes very easy. You have the ideal to judge everyone with, and you can say to +anyone, "You are violent." India has created many ideals; that is why India continuously +goes on condemning the whole world. The whole mind of India is condemnatory. It goes +on condemning the whole world: everyone else is violent, only India is nonviolent. + +No one seems to be nonviolent here, but the ideal is good for condemning others. It never +changes you, but you can condemn others because you have the ideal, the criterion. And +whenever you are violent you can rationalize it — your violence is an altogether different +thing. + +These past twenty-five years we have been violent many times, but we have never +condemned our violence. We have always defended and rationalized it in beautiful terms. +If we are violent in Bengal, in Bangladesh, then we say that it is to help the people there +to obtain freedom. If we are violent in Kashmir, it is to help Kashmiris. But you know, all +those who are warmongering say the same. If America is violent in Vietnam, it is for +"those poor people." No one is violent for himself; no one ever has been. We are always +violent to help someone. Even if I kill you it is for your own good, it is to help you. And +even if you are killed, even if I kill you, just look at my compassion. Even for your own +good I can kill you. So go on condemning the whole world. + +When India attacked Goa, when India went to war with China, Bertrand Russell +criticized Nehru, saying, "Where is your nonviolence now? You are all Gandhians. + +Where is your nonviolence now?" Nehru replied by banning Bertrand Russell's book in +India. The book Russell wrote was banned. This is our nonviolent mind. + +This was a good discussion. + +The book should have been distributed free, because he argued beautifully. He said, "You +are a violent people. Your nonviolence was just political. Your Gandhi was not a sage, he +was just a diplomatic mind. And you all talk about nonviolence, but when the moment +comes you become violent. When others are fighting, you stand on your high altar and +you condemn the whole world as violent." + +With individuals, with societies, with cultures, with nations, this happens. If you have +ideals, you need not transform yourself. You can always hope to be transformed in the +future by the ideals themselves, and you can condemn others very easily. + +Tantra says to remain with yourself. Whatsoever you are, accept it. Do not condemn +yourself, do not condemn others. Condemnation is futile, energies are not changed by it. +The first step is to accept. Remain with the fact — this is very scientific — remain with the +fact of anger, greed and sex. And know the fact in its total facticity. Do not just touch it +from above, from the surface. Know the fact in its totality, in its total facticity. Move into +it to the roots. And remember, whenever you can move to the roots of anything you +transcend it. If you can know your sex to the very roots, you become the master of it. If +you can know your anger to the very roots, you become the master of it. Then anger +becomes just instrumental — you can use it. + + + +I remember many things about Gurdjieff. Gurdjieff taught his disciples to be rightly +angry. We have heard about Buddha's words: right meditation, right thinking and right +contemplation. We have heard about Mahavir’s teaching of right vision and right +knowledge. Gurdjieff taught right anger and right greed, and the teaching was influenced +by the old tantra tradition. Gurdjieff was condemned very much in the West, because in +the West he was a living symbol of tantra. + +He would teach right anger; he would teach you how to be angry totally. If you were +angry he would tell you, "Go on. Do not suppress it, let it come out in its totality. Move +into it. Become anger. Do not withhold, do not stand aside. Take a deep jump into it. Let +your whole body become a flare, a fire." + +You have never moved this deeply and you have never seen anyone do so, because +everyone is more or less cultured. No one is original; everyone is more or less imitating. +No one is original! If you can move into anger totally, you will become just a fire, a +burning. The fire will be so deep, the flames will be so deep, that the past and future both +will cease immediately. You will become just a present flame. And when your every cell +is burning, when every part of the body has become fiery and you have become just anger +— not angry — then Gurdjieff will say, "Now be aware. Do not suppress. + +Now be aware. Now suddenly be aware of what you have become, of what anger is." + +In this moment of total present-ness one can become suddenly aware, and you can start +laughing at the absurdity of the whole thing, at the foolishness, at the stupidity of the +whole thing. But this is not suppression; this is laughter. You can laugh at yourself +because you have transcended yourself. Never again will anger be capable of mastering +you. + +You have known anger in its totality, and still you could laugh and still you could go +beyond it. You could see from beyond your anger. Once you have seen its totality, you +know what anger is. And now you also know that even if the whole energy transforms +into anger, still you can be an observer, a witness. So there is no fear. Remember this: +that which is not known always creates fear. That which is dark always creates fear. You +are afraid of your own anger. + +So people go on saying that we suppress anger because it is not good to be angry, it may +hurt others. But that is not the real cause. The real cause is that they are afraid of their +anger. If they really get angry, they do not know what may happen. They are afraid of +themselves. They have never known anger. It is a very fearful thing, hidden inside, so +they are afraid of it. That is why they fall in line with the society, with the culture, with +the education, and they say, "We must not be angry. + +Anger is bad. It hurts others." + +You are afraid of your anger, you are afraid of your sex. You have never been in sex +totally. You have never been in sex so totally that you could have forgotten yourself. You +were always there; your mind was always there. And if the mind is there in the sex act, +then the act is just pseudo, bogus. The mind must dissolve; you must become just body. +There must not be any thinking. If thinking is there, you are divided. Then the sex act is +nothing but releasing overflowing energy. It is a release, nothing else. But you are afraid +to be totally in sex. That is why you fall in line, why you toe the line with the society and +say that sex is bad. You are afraid! + +Why are you afraid? Because if you move into sex totally, you do not know what you can + + + +do, you do not know what can happen, you do not know what animal force may come up, +you do not know what your unconscious may throw you into. You do not know! Then +you will not be the master; you will not be in control. Your self-image may be destroyed. +Thus you control the sex act. And the way to control it is to remain in the mind. Let the +sex act be there, but local. + +Try to understand this 'local' and 'general'. Tantra says a sex act is local when only your +sex center is involved. It is local; it is a local release. The sex center keeps on +accumulating energy. When it is overflowing you have to release it; otherwise it will +create tensions, it will create heaviness. + +You release it, but it is a local release. Your whole body, your whole self is not involved. +Non-local, total involvement means that every fiber of the body, every cell of the body, +whatsoever you are, is in it. Your whole being has become sexual. Not only your sex +center, your whole being has become sexual. + +But then you are afraid because then anything is possible. And you do not know what can +happen because you have never known the totality. You may do certain things of which +you cannot conceive. + +Your unconscious will explode. You will become not one animal, but many animals, +because you have passed through many lives, through many animal bodies. You may +start howling, you may start screaming, you may start roaring like a lion. You do not +know. + +Anything is possible — that creates fear. You need to be in control so that you never lose +yourself in anything. That is why you never know anything. And unless you know, you +cannot transcend. + +Accept, move deep, go to the very roots. This is tantra. Tantra stands for deep +experiences. Anything experienced can be transcended; anything suppressed can never be +transcended. + +This much for today. + + +THE END. + + + +Chapter 9: Techniques for centering + + +13. OR, IMAGINE THE FIVE-COLORED CIRCLES OF THE PEACOCK TAIL TO +BE YOUR FIVE SENSES IN ILLIMITABLE SPACE. NOW LET THEIR BEAUTY +MELT WITHIN. SIMILARLY, AT ANY POINT IN SPACE OR ON A WALL - +UNTIL THE POINT DISSOLVES. THEN YOUR WISH FOR ANOTHER COMES +TRUE. + +14. PLACE YOUR WHOLE ATTENTION IN THE NERVE, DELICATE AS THE +LOTUS THREAD, IN THE CENTER OF YOUR SPINAL COLUMN. IN SUCH BE +TRANSFORMED. + +Man is bom with a center, but he remains completely oblivious of it. Man can live +without knowing his center, but man cannot be without a center. The center is the link +between man and existence; it is the root. Y ou may not know it, knowledge is not +essential for the center to be, but if you do not know it you will lead a life that is rootless +— as if rootless. You will not feel any ground, you will not feel yourself based; you will +not feel at home in the universe. You will be homeless. + +Of course, the center is there, but by not knowing it your life will be just a drifting — +meaningless, empty, reaching nowhere. You will feel as if you are living without life, +drifting, just waiting for death. You can go on postponing from one moment to another, +but you know very well that that postponing will lead you nowhere. You are just passing +time, and that feeling of deep frustration will follow you like a shadow. Man is born with +a center, but not with the knowledge of the center. + +The knowledge has to be gained. + +You have the center. The center is there; you cannot be without it. How can you exist +without a center? How can you exist without a bridge between you and existence?... or if +you like, the word ’God'. You cannot exist without a deep link. You have roots in the +divine. Every moment you live through those roots, but those roots are underground. Just +as with any tree, the roots are underground; the tree is unaware of its own roots. You also +have roots. That rootedness is your center. When I say man is born with it, I mean it is a +possibility that you can become aware of your rootedness. If you become aware, your life +becomes actual; otherwise your life will be just like a deep sleep, a dream. + +What Abraham Maslow has called "self-actualization" is really nothing but becoming +aware of your inner center from where you are linked with the total universe, becoming +aware of your roots: you are not alone, you are not atomic, you are part of this cosmic +whole. This universe is not an alien world. You are not a stranger, this universe is your +home. But unless you find your roots, your center, this universe remains something alien, +something foreign. + +Sartre says that man lives as if he has been thrown into the world. Of course, if you do +not know your center you will feel a thrownness, as if you have been thrown into the +world. You are an outsider; you do not belong to this world and this world doesn’t belong +to you. + +Then fear, then anxiety, then anguish are bound to result. A man as an outsider in the +universe is bound to feel deep anxiety, dread, fear, anguish. His whole life will be just a +fight, a struggle, and a struggle which is destined to be a failure. Man cannot succeed + + + +because a part can never succeed against the whole. + +You cannot succeed against existence. You can succeed with it, but never against it. And +that is the difference between a religious man and a non-religious man. A non-religious +man is against the universe; a religious man is with the universe. A religious man feels at +home. He doesn’t feel he has been thrown into the world, he feels he has grown in the +world. Remember the difference between being thrown and being grown. + +When Sartre says man is thrown into the world, the very word, the very fonnulation +shows that you do not belong. And the word, the choice of the word ’thrown’ means that +you have been forced without your consent. So this world appears inimical. Then anguish +will be the result. + +It can be otherwise only if you are not thrown into the world, but you have grown as a +part, as an organic part. Really, it would be better to say that you are the universe grown +into a particular dimension which we call "human." The universe grows in multi- +dimensions — in trees, in hills, in stars, in planets... in multi-dimensions. Man is also a +dimension of growth. + +The universe is realizing itself through many, many dimensions. Man is also a dimension +along with the height and the peak. No tree can become aware of its roots; no animal can +become aware of its roots. That is why there is no anxiety for them. + +If you are not aware of your roots, of your center, you can never be aware of your death. +Death is only for man. It exists only for man because only man can become aware of his +roots, aware of his center, aware of his totality and his rootedness in the universe. + +If you live without a center, if you feel you are an outsider, then anguish will result. +However, if you feel that you are at home, that you are a growth, a realization of the +potentiality of the existence itself — as if existence itself has become aware in you, as if it +has gained awareness in you — if you feel that way, if you really realize that way, the +result will be bliss. + +Bliss is the result of an organic unity with the universe, and anguish the result of an +enmity. But unless you know the center you are bound to feel a thrownness, as if life has +been forced upon you. This center which is there, although man is not aware of it, is the +concern of these sutras which we will discuss. Before we enter into VIGYANA +BHAIRAVA TANTRA and its techniques concerning the center, two or three things +more. + +One: when man is bom he is rooted in a particular spot, in a particular CHAKRA — +center — and that is the navel. + +The Japanese call it HARA; hence the term HARA-KIRI. Hara-kiri means suicide. +Literally, the term means killing the hara — the spine, the center. Hara is the center; +destroying the center is the meaning of hara-kiri. But in a way, we have all committed +hara-kiri. We have not killed the center, but we have forgotten it, or we have never +remembered it. It is there waiting, and we have been drifting away and away from it. +When a child is born he is rooted in the navel, in the hara; he lives through the hara. Look +at a child breathing — his navel goes up and down. He breathes with the belly, he lives +with the belly — not with the head, not with the heart. But by and by he will have to drift +away. + +First he will develop another center — that is the heart, the center of emotion. He will +learn love, he will be loved, and another center will develop. This center is not the real +center; this center is a by-product. That is why psychologists say that if a child is not + + + +loved, he will never be able to love. + +If a child is brought up in a non-loving situation — a situation which is cold, with no one +to love and give wannth — he himself will never be able in his life to love anyone +because the very center will not develop. Mother’s love, father's love, family, society — +they help to develop a center. That center is a by-product; you are not born with it. So if +it is not being helped to grow, it will not grow. + +Many, many persons are without the love center. They go on talking about love, and they +go on believing that they love, but they lack the center, so how can they love? It is +difficult to get a loving mother, and very difficult and rare to get a loving father. Every +father, every mother, thinks that he or she loves. It is not so easy. Love is a difficult +growth, very difficult. But if love is not there in the beginning for the child, he himself +will never be able to love. + +That is why the whole humanity lives without love. You go on producing children, but +you do not know how to give them a love center. Rather, on the contrary, the more +society becomes civilized, the more it forces into being a third center, which is intellect. +The navel is the original center. A child is born with it; it is not a by-product. Without it +life is impossible, so it is given. The second center is a by-product. If the child gets love, +he responds. In this responding, a center grows in him: that is the heart center. The third +center is reason, intellect, head. Education, logic and training create a third center; that +too is a by-product. + +But we live at the third center. The second is almost absent — or even if it is present, then +it is non-functioning; or even if it functions sometimes, it functions irregularly. But the +third center, the head, becomes the basic force in life because the whole life depends on +this third center. + +It is utilitarian. You need it for reason, logic, thinking. So everyone becomes, sooner or +later, head-oriented; you begin to live in the head. + +Head, heart, navel — these are the three centers. The navel is the given center, the original +one. Heart can be developed, and it is good to develop it for many reasons. Reason is +necessary to develop also, but reason must not be developed at the cost of the heart — +because if reason is developed at the cost of the heart then you miss the link and you +cannot come to the navel again. The development is from reason to existence to being. + +Let us try to understand it in this way. + +The center of the navel is in being; the center of the heart is in feeling; the center of the +head is in knowing. Knowing is the farthest from being — feeling is nearer. If you miss +the feeling center, then it is very difficult to create a bridge between reason and being — +really, very difficult. That is why a loving person may realize his at-homeness in the +world more easily than a person who lives through intellect. + +Western culture has basically emphasized the head center. That is why in the West a deep +concern is felt for man. And the deep concern is with his homelessness, his emptiness, his +uprootedness. Simone Weil wrote a book, THE NEED FOR ROOTS. Western man feels +uprooted, as if with no roots. The reason is because only the head has become the center. + +The heart has not been trained, it is missing. + +The beating of the heart is not your heart, it is just a physiological function. So if you feel +the beating, do not misunderstand that you have a heart. Heart is something else. Heart +means the capacity to feel; head means the capacity to know. Heart means the capacity to + + + +feel, and being means the capacity to be one — to be one with something... the capacity to +be one with something. + +Religion is concerned with the being; poetry is concerned with the heart; philosophy and +science are concerned with the head. These two centers, heart and head, are peripheral +centers, not real centers, just false centers. The real center is the navel, the hara. How to +attain it again? Or how to realize it? + +Ordinarily it happens only sometimes — rarely, accidentally it happens — that you come +near the hara. That moment will become a very deep, blissful moment. For example, in +sex sometimes you come near the hara, because in sex your mind, your consciousness +moves downwards again. You have to leave your head and fall down. In a deep sexual +orgasm, sometimes it happens that you are near your hara. That is why there is so much +fascination about sex. It is not really sex which gives you the blissful experience, really, +it is the hara. + +In falling down toward sex you pass through the hara, you touch it. But for modern man +even that has become impossible, because for modem man even sex is a cerebral affair, a +mental affair. + +Even sex has gone into the head; he thinks about it. That is why there are so many films, +so many novels, so much literature, pornography and the like. Man thinks about sex, but +that is absurdity. Sex is an experience; you cannot think about it. And if you start +thinking about it, it will be more and more difficult to experience it because it is not a +concern of the head at all. Reason is not needed. + +And the more modem man feels incapable of going deep in sex, the more he thinks about +it. It becomes a vicious circle. And the more he thinks about it, the more it becomes +cerebral. Then even sex becomes futile. It has become futile in the West, a repetitive +thing, boring. Nothing is gained, you just go on repeating an old habit. And ultimately +you feel frustrated — as if you have been cheated. Why? Because really, the +consciousness is not falling back down to the center. + +Only when passing through the hara do you feel bliss. So whatsoever may be the cause, +whenever you pass through the hara you feel bliss. A warrior on the field fighting +sometimes passes through the hara, but not modern warriors because they are not +warriors at all. A person throwing a bomb on a city is asleep. He is not a warrior; he is +not a fighter; he is not a KSHATRIYA — not Arjuna fighting. + +Sometimes when one is on the verge of death one is thrown back to the hara. For a +warrior fighting with his sword, any moment death becomes possible, any moment he +may be no more. + +And when fighting with a sword you cannot think. If you think, you will be no more. You +have to act without thinking because thinking feeds time; if you are fighting with a sword +you cannot think. If you think then the other will win, you will be no more. There is no +time to think, and the mind needs time. Because there is no time to think and thinking +will mean death, consciousfess falls down from the head — it goes to the hara, and a +warrior has a blissful experience. That is why there is so much fascination about war. Sex +and war have been two fascinations, and the reason is this: you pass through the hara. + +You pass through it in any danger. + +Nietzsche says, live dangerously. Why? Because in danger you are thrown back to the +hara. You cannot think; you cannot work things out with the mind. You have to act +immediately. + + + +A snake passes. Suddenly you see the snake and there is a jump. There is no deliberate +thinking about it, that "There is a snake." There is no syllogism; you do not argue within +your mind, "Now there is a snake and snakes are dangerous, so I must jump." There is no +logical reasoning like this. If you reason like this, then you will not be alive at all. You +cannot reason. You have to act spontaneously, immediately. The act comes first and then +comes thinking. When you have jumped, then you think. + +In ordinary life, when there is no danger you think first, then you act. + +In danger, the whole process is reversed; you act first and then you think. That action +coming first without thinking throws you to your original center — the hara. That is why +there is the fascination with danger. + +You are driving a car faster and faster and faster, and suddenly a moment comes when +every moment is dangerous. Any moment and there will be no life. In that moment of +suspense, when death and life are just as near to each other as possible, two points just +near and you in between, the mind stops: you are thrown to the hara. That is why there is +so much fascination with cars, driving — fast driving, mad driving. Or you are gambling +and you have put everything you have at stake — the mind stops, there is danger. The +next moment you can become a beggar. The mind cannot function; you are thrown to the +hara. + +Dangers have their appeal because in danger your day-to-day, ordinary consciousness +cannot function. Danger goes deep. Your mind is not needed; you become a no-mind. +YOU ARE! You are conscious, but there is no thinking. That moment becomes +meditative. Really, in gambling, gamblers are seeking a meditative state of mind. In +danger — in a fight, in a duel, in wars — man has always been seeking meditative states. + +A bliss suddenly erupts, explodes in you. It becomes a showering inside. But these are +sudden, accidental happenings. One thing is certain: whenever you feel blissful you are +nearer the hara. + +That is certain no matter what the cause; the cause is irrelevant. Whenever you pass near +the original center you are filled with bliss. + +These sutras are concerned with creating a rootedness in the hara, in the center, +scientifically, in a planned way — not accidentally, not momentarily, but permanently. +You can remain continuously in the hara, that can become your rootedness. How to make +this so and how to create this are the concerns of these sutras. + +Now we will take the first sutra which is another of the ways concerning the point, or +center. + +First: + +OR IMAGINE THE FIVE-COLORED CIRCLES OF THE PEACOCK TAIL TO BE +YOUR FIVE SENSES IN ILLIMITABLE SPACE. NOW, LET THEIR BEAUTY +MELT WITHIN. SIMILARLY, AT ANY POINT IN SPACE OR ON A WALL - +UNTIL THE POINT DISSOLVES. THEN YOUR WISH FOR ANOTHER COMES +TRUE. + +All these sutras are concerned with how to achieve the inner center. The basic +mechanism used, the basic technique used is, if you can create a center outside — +anywhere: in the mind, in the heart, or even outside on a wall — and if you concentrate +totally on it and you bracket out the whole world, you forget the whole world and only +one point remains in your consciousness, suddenly you will be thrown to your inner + + + +center. + +How does it work? First understand this... Your mind is just a vagabond, a wandering. It +is never at one point. + +It is always going, moving, reaching, but never at any point. It goes from one thought to +another, from A to B. But it is never at the A; it is never at the B. It is always on the +move. Remember this: mind is always on the move, hoping to reach somewhere but +never reaching. It cannot reach! The very structure of the mind is movement. It can only +move; that is the inherent nature of the mind. The very process is movement — from A to +B, from B to C... it goes on and on. + +If you stop at A or B or any point, the mind will fight with you. The mind will say, + +"Move on," because if you stop the mind dies immediately. It can be alive only in +movement. The mind means a process. If you stop and do not move, mind suddenly +becomes dead, it is no more there; only consciousness remains. + +Consciousness is your nature; mind is your activity — just like walking. It is difficult +because we think mind is something substantial. We think mind is a substance — it is not, +mind is just an activity. So it is really better to call it "minding" than mind. It is a process +just like walking. Walking is a process, if you stop, there is no walking. You have legs, +but no walking. Legs can walk, but if you stop then legs will be there but there will be no +walking. + +Consciousness is like legs — your nature. Mind is like walking — just a process. When +consciousness moves from one place to another, this process is mind. + +When consciousness moves from A to B, from B to C, this movement is mind. If you +stop the movement, there is no mind. You are conscious, but there is no mind. You have +legs, but no walking. Walking is a function, an activity; mind is also a function, an +activity. + +If you stop at any point, the mind will struggle. The mind will say, "Go on!" The mind +will try in every way to push you forward or backward or anywhere — but, "Go on!" +Anywhere will do, but do not stay at one point. + +If you insist and if you do not obey the mind... it is difficult because you have always +obeyed. You have never ordered the mind; you have never been masters. You cannot be +because, really, you have never disidentified yourself from the mind. You think you are +the mind. This fallacy that you are the mind gives the mind total freedom, because then +there is no one to master it, to control it. There is no one! Mind itself becomes the master. +It may become the master, but that mastery is just seemingly so. Try once and you can +break that mastery — it is false. + +Mind is just a slave pretending to be the master, but it has pretended so long, for lives and +lives, that even the master believes that the slave is the master. That is just a belief. Try +the contrary and you will know that that belief was totally unfounded. + +This first sutra says, IMAGINE THE FIVE-COLORED CIRCLE OF THE PEACOCK +TAIL TO BE YOUR FIVE SENSES IN ILLIMITABLE SPACE. + +NOW LET THEIR BEAUTY MELT WITHIN. Think that your five senses are five +colors, and those five colors are filling the whole space. Just imagine your five senses are +five colors — beautiful colors, alive, extended into infinite space. Then move within with +those colors. Move within and feel a center where all these five colors are meeting within +you. This is just imagination, but it helps. Just imagine these five colors penetrating + + + +within you and meeting at a point. + +Of course, these five colors will meet at a point: the whole world will dissolve. In your +imagination there are only five colors — just like around the tail of a peacock — spread all +over space, going deep within you, meeting at a point. Any point will do, but the hara is +the best. Think that they are meeting at your navel — that the whole world has become +colors, and those colors are meeting at your navel. See that point, concentrate on that +point, and concentrate until the point dissolves. If you concentrate on the point it +dissolves, because it is just imagination. Remember, whatsoever we have done is +imagination. If you concentrate on it, it will dissolve. And when the point dissolves, you +are thrown to your center. + +The world has dissolved. There is no world for you. In this meditation there is only color. +You have forgotten the whole world; you have forgotten all the objects. You have chosen +only five colors. + +Choose any five colors. This is particularly for those who have a very keen eye, a very +deep color sensitivity. This meditation will not be helpful to everyone. Unless you have a +painter's eye, a color consciousness, unless you can imagine color, it is difficult. + +Have you ever observed that your dreams are colorless? Only one person in a hundred is +capable of seeing colored dreams. You see just black and white. Why? The whole world +is colored and your dreams are colorless. If one of you remembers that his dreams are +colored, this meditation is for him. If someone remembers even sometimes that he sees +colors in his dreams, then this meditation will be for him. + +If you say to a person who is insensitive to color, "Imagine the whole space filled with +colors," he will not be able to imagine. Even if he tries to imagine, if he thinks, "Red," he +will see the word 'red', he will not see the color. He will say, "Green," and the word +'green' will be there, but there will be no greenness. + +So if you have a color sensitivity, then try this method. There are five colors. The whole +world is just colors and those five colors are meeting in you. Deep down somewhere in +you, those five colors are meeting. Concentrate on that point, and go on concentrating on +it. Do not move from it; remain at it. Do not allow the mind. Do not try to think about +green and red and yellow and about colors — do not thi nk . + +Just see them meeting in you. Do not think about them! If you think, the mind has moved. +Just be filled with colors meeting in you, and then at the meeting point, concentrate. Do +not think! Concentration is not thinking; it is not contemplation. + +If you are really filled with colors and you have become just a rainbow, a peacock, and +the whole space is filled with colors, it will give you a deep feeling of beauty. But do not +think about it; do not say it is beautiful. Do not move in thinking. Concentrate on the +point where all these colors are meeting and go on concentrating on it. It will disappear, it +will dissolve, because it is just imagination. And if you force concentration, imagination +cannot remain there, it will dissolve. + +The world has dissolved already; there were only colors. Those colors were your +imagination. Those imaginative colors were meeting at a point. That point, of course, was +imaginary — and now, with deep concentration, that point will dissolve. Where are you +now? Where will you be? You will be thrown to your center. + +Objects have dissolved through imagination. Now imagination will dissolve through +concentration. You alone are left as a subjectivity. The objective world has dissolved; the +mental world has dissolved. You are there only as pure consciousness. + + + +That is why this sutra says: AT ANY POINT IN SPACE OR ON A WALL. + + +.. This will help. If you cannot imagine colors, then any point on the wall will help. Take +anything just as an object of concentration. If it is inner it is better, but again, there are +two types of personalities. For those who are introvert, it will be easy to conceive of all +the colors meeting within. But there are extroverts who cannot conceive of anything +within. They can imagine only the outside. Their minds move only on the outside; they +cannot move in. For them there is nothing like innerness. + +The English philosopher David Hume has said, "Whenever I go in, I never meet any self. +All that I meet are only reflections of the outside world — a thought, some emotion, some +feeling. I never meet the innerness, I only meet the outside world reflected in." This is the +extrovert mind par excellence, and David Hume is one of the most extrovert minds. + +So if you cannot feel anything within, and if the mind asks, "What does this innerness +mean? How to go in?" then try any point on the wall instead. There are persons who +come to me and ask how to go in. It is a problem, because if you know only outgoing- +ness, if you know only outward movements, it is difficult to imagine how to go in. + +If you are an extrovert then do not try this point inside, try it outside. The same will be +the result. Make a dot on the wall; concentrate on it. Then you will have to concentrate +on it with open eyes. + +If you are creating a center inside, a point within, then you will have to concentrate with +closed eyes. + +Make a point on a wall and concentrate on it. The real thing happens because of +concentration, not because of the point. Whether it is out or in is irrelevant. It depends on +you. If you are looking at the outside wall, concentrating on it, then go on concentrating +until the point dissolves. That has to be noted: UNTIL THE POINT DISSOLVES! Do +not blink your eyes, because blinking gives a space for the mind to move again. Do not +blink, because then the mind starts thinking. It becomes a gap; in the blinking, the +concentration is lost. So no blinking. + +You might have heard about Bodhidhanna, one of the greatest masters of meditation in +the whole history of humankind. A very beautiful story is reported about him. + +He was concentrating on something — something outward. His eyes would blink and the +concentration would be lost, so he tore off his eyelids. This is a beautiful story: he tore +off his eyelids, threw them away, and concentrated. After a few weeks, he saw some +plants growing on the spot where he had thrown his eyelids. This anecdote happened on a +mountain in China, and the mountain's name is Tah, or Ta. Hence, the name 'tea'. Those +plants which were growing became tea, and that is why tea helps you to be awake. + +When your eyes are blinking and you are falling down into sleep, take a cup of tea. + +Those are Bodhidhanna's eyelids. That is why Zen monks consider tea to be sacred. Tea +is not any ordinary thing, it is sacred — Bodhidhanna’s eyelids. In Japan they have tea +ceremonies, and every house has a tea room, and the tea is served with religious +ceremony; it is sacred. Tea has to be taken in a very meditative mood. + +Japan has created beautiful ceremonies around tea drinking. They will enter the tea room +as if they are entering a temple. Then the tea will be made, and everyone will sit silently +listening to the samovar bubbling. There is the steam, the noise, and everyone just +listening. It is no ordinary thing... Bodhidhanna's eyelids. And because Bodhidhanna was +trying to be awake with open eyes, tea helps. Because the story happened on the + + + +mountain of Tah, it is called tea. Whether true or untrue, this anecdote is beautiful. + +If you are concentrating outwardly, then non-blinking eyes will be needed, as if you no +longer have eyelids. That is the meaning of throwing away the eyelids. You have only +eyes, without eyelids to close them. Concentrating until the point dissolves. If you +persist, if you insist and do not allow the mind to move, the point dissolves. And when +the point dissolves, if you were concentrated on the point and there was only this point +for you in the world, if the whole world had dissolved already, if only this point remained +and now the point also dissolves, then the consciousness cannot move anywhere. + +There is no object to move to — all the dimensions are closed. The mind is thrown to +itself, the consciousness is thrown to itself, and you enter the center. + +So whether in or out, within or without, concentrate until the point dissolves. This point +will dissolve for two reasons. If it is within, it is imaginary — it will dissolve. If it is +outside, it is not imaginary, it is real. You have made a dot on the wall and have +concentrated on it. Then why will this dot dissolve? One can understand it dissolving +inside — it was not there at all; you just imagined it — but on the wall it is there, so why +will it dissolve? + +It dissolves for a certain reason. If you concentrate on a point, the point is not really +going to dissolve, the mind dissolves. If you are concentrating on an outer point, the mind +cannot move. Without movement it cannot live, it dies, it stops. And when the mind stops +you cannot be related with anything outward. Suddenly all bridges are broken, because +mind is the bridge. When you are concentrating on a point on the wall, constantly your +mind is jumping from you to the point, from the point to you, from you to the point. + +There is a constant jumping; there is a process. + +When the mind dissolves you cannot see the point, because really, you never see the +point through the eyes: you see the point through the mind AND through the eyes. If the +mind is not there, the eyes cannot function. + +You may go on staring at the wall, but the point will not be seen. The mind is not there; +the bridge is broken. The point is real — it is there. When the mind will come back, you +will see it again; it is there. But now you cannot see it. And when you cannot see, you +cannot move out. Suddenly, you are at your center. + +This centering will make you aware of your existential roots. You will know from where +you are joined to the existence. In you, there is a point which is related with the total +existence, which is one with it. Once you know this center, you know you are at home. +This world is not alien. You are not an outsider. You are an insider, you belong to the +world. There is no need of any struggle, there is no fight. There is no inimical +relationship between you and the existence. The existence becomes your mother. + +It is the existence that has come into you and that has become aware. It is the existence +that has flowered in you. This feeling, this realization, this happening... and there can be +no anguish again. + +Then bliss is not a phenomenon; it is not something that happens and then goes. Then +blissfulness is your very nature. When one is rooted in one's center, blissfulness is +natural. One happens to be blissful, and by and by one even becomes unaware that one is +blissful, because awareness needs contrast. If you are miserable, then you can feel it +when you are blissful. + + +When misery is no more, by and by you forget misery completely. And you forget your + + + +bliss also. And only when you can forget your bliss also are you really blissful. Then it is +natural. As stars are shining, as rivers are flowing, so are you blissful. Your very being is +blissful. It is not something that has happened to you: now it IS YOU. + +With the second sutra, the mechanism is the same, the scientific basis is the same, the +working structure is the same: + +PLACE YOUR WHOLE ATTENTION IN THE NERVE, DELICATE AS THE LOTUS +THREAD, IN THE CENTER OF YOUR SPINAL COLUMN. IN SUCH BE +TRANSFORMED. + +For this sutra, for this technique of meditation, one has to close his eyes and visualize his +spinal column, his backbone. It is good to look up in some physiology book the structure +of the body, or to go to some medical college or hospital and look at the structure of the +body. Then close your eyes and visualize your backbone. Let the backbone be straight, +erect. Visualize it, see it, and just in the middle of it visualize a nerve, delicate as the +lotus thread, running in the center of your spinal column. IN SUCH BE +TRANSFORMED. + +If you can, concentrate on the spinal column, and then on a thread in the middle of it — on +a very delicate nerve like a lotus thread running through it. Concentrate on it, and this +very concentration throws you to your center. + +Why? + +The spinal column is the base of your whole body structure. Everything is joined to it. +Really, your brain is nothing but one pole of your spinal column. Physiologists say it is +nothing but a spinal column growth; your brain is really a growth of your spinal column. +Your spine is connected with your whole body — everything is connected to it. That is +why it is called the spine, the base. In this spine there is really a thread-like thing, but +physiology will not say anything about it because it is not material. In this spine, just in +the middle, there is a silver cord — a very delicate nerve. It is not really a nerve in the +physiological sense. You cannot operate and find it; it will not be found there. + +But in deep meditation it is seen. It is there; it is non-material. It is energy, not matter. + +And really, that energy cord in your spinal column is your life. Through that you are +related to the invisible existence, and through that also you are related to the visible. That +is the bridge between the invisible and the visible. Through that thread you are related to +the body, and through that thread also you are related to your soul. + +First, visualize the spine. At first you will feel very strange, you will be able to visualize +it, but as an imagination. And if you go on endeavoring, then it will not be just your +imagination. You will become capable of seeing your spinal column. + + +I was working with a seeker on this technique. I gave him a picture of the body structure +to concentrate upon so that he would begin to feel how the spinal column can be +visualized inside. Then he started. Within a week he came and said, "This is very strange +I tried to see the picture you gave me, but many times that picture disappeared and I saw +a different spine. It is not exactly like the picture you gave to me." + +So I told him, "Now you are on the right path. Forget that picture completely, and go on +seeing the spine that has become visible to you." + +Man can see his own body structure from within. We have not tried it because it is very, +very fearful, loathsome; because when you see your bones, blood, veins, you become + + + +afraid. So really, we have completely blocked our minds from seeing within. We see the +body from without, as if someone else is looking at the body. It is just as if you go +outside this room and look at it — then you know the outer walls. Come in and look at the +house — then you can look at the inner walls. You see your body from outside as if you +are somebody else seeing your body. You have not seen your body from inside. We are +capable of it, but because of this fear it has become a strange thing. + +Indian yoga books say many things about the body which have been found to be exactly +right by new scientific research, and science is unable to explain this. + +How could they know? Surgery and knowledge of the inside of the human body are very +recent developments. How could they know of all the nerves, of all the centers, of all the +inner structures? They knew even about the latest findings; they have talked about them, +they have worked upon them. Yoga has always been aware about all the basic, significant +things in the body. But they were not dissecting bodies, so how could they know? + +Really, there is another way of looking at your own body — from within. If you can +concentrate within, suddenly you begin to see your body — the inner lining of the body. +This is good for those who are deeply body-oriented. If you feel yourself a materialist, if +you feel yourself to be nothing but body, this technique will be very helpful for you. If +you feel yourself to be a body, if you are a believer in Charvak or in Marx, if you believe +that man is nothing but a body, this technique will be very helpful for you. Then go and +see the bone structure of man. + +In the old tantra and yoga schools they used many bones. Even now a tantric will always +be found with some bones, with a man's skull. Really, that is to help concentration from +inside. First he concentrates on that skull, then he closes his eyes and tries to visualize his +own skull. He goes on trying to see the outer skull inside, and by and by he begins to feel +his own skull. His consciousness begins to be focused. + +That outer skull, the concentration on it and the visualization, are just helps. Once you +are focused inside, you can move from your toes to your head. You can move inside — +and it is a great universe. Your small body is a great universe. + +This sutra uses the spinal column because within the spinal column there is the thread of +life. This is why there is so much insistence on a straight backbone, because if the +backbone is not straight you will not be capable of seeing the inner thread. It is very +delicate, it is very subtle — it is minute. It is an energy flow. So if the spinal column is +straight, absolutely straight, only then can you have glimpses of that thread. + +But our spinal columns are not straight. Hindus have tried to make everyone's spinal +column straight from the very childhood. Their ways of sitting, their ways of sleeping, +their ways of walking were all based, basically, on a straight spinal column. If the spinal +column is not straight, then it is very difficult to see the inner core. It is delicate — and +really, it is not material. It is immaterial; it is a force. When the spinal column is +absolutely straight, that thread-like force is seen easily. + +... IN SUCH BE TRANSFORMED. Once you can feel, concentrate and realize this +thread, you will be filled with a new light. The light will be coming from your spinal +column. It will spread all over your body; it may even go beyond your body. + +When it goes beyond, auras are seen. + +Everyone has an aura, but ordinarily your auras are nothing but shadows with no light in +them — just dark shadows around you. And those auras reflect your every mood. When + + + +you are angry, then your auras become as if blood- filled; they become filled with a red, +angry expression. When you are sad, dim, down, then your auras are filled with dark +threads, as if you are just near death — everything dead, heavy. + +When this spinal column thread is realized, your auras become enlightened. So a Buddha, +a Mahavir, a Krishna, a Christ are not painted with auras just as decorations, those auras +exist. Your spinal column begins to throw out light. Within, you become enlightened — +your whole body becomes a body of light — then it penetrates the outer. So really, for a +buddha, for anyone who is enlightened, there is no need to ask anyone what he is. The +aura shows everything. And when someone becomes enlightened the master knows it, +because the aura reveals everything. + +I will tell you one story... Hui Neng, a Chinese master, was working under his master. +When Hui Neng went to his master, the master said, "For what have you come here? +There is no need to come to me." He couldn't understand. Hui Neng thought that he was +not yet ready to be accepted, but the master was seeing something else. He was seeing his +growing aura. He was saying this: "Even if you do not come to me, the thing is bound to +happen sooner or later, anywhere. + +You are already in it, so there is no need to come to me." + +But Hui Neng said, "Do not reject me." So the master accepted him and told him to go +just behind the monastery, in the kitchen of the monastery. It was a big monastery of five +hundred monks. The master said to Hui Neng, "Just go behind the monastery and help in +the kitchen, and do not come again to me. Whenever it will be needed, I will come to +you." + +No meditation was given to Hui Neng, no scriptures to read, study or meditate upon. +Nothing was taught to him, he was just thrown into the kitchen. The whole monastery +was working. There were pundits, scholars, and there were meditators, and there were +yogis, and the whole monastery was agog. Everyone was working and this Hui Neng was +just cleaning rice and doing kitchen work. + +Twelve years passed. Hui Neng didn’t go again to the master because it was not allowed. +He waited, he waited, he waited... he simply waited. He was just taken as a servant. +Scholars would come, meditators would come, and no one would even pay any attention +to him. And there were big scholars in the monastery. + +Then the master declared that his death was near, and now he wanted to appoint someone +to function in his place, so he said, "Those who think they are enlightened should +compose a small poem of four lines. In those four lines you should put all that you have +gained. + +And if I approve any poems and see that the lines show that enlightenment has happened, +I will choose someone as my successor." + +There was a great scholar in the monastery, and no one attempted the poem because +everyone knew that he was going to win. He was a great knower of scriptures, so he +composed four lines. Those four lines were just like this... the meaning of it was like this: +"Mind is like a mirror, and dust gathers on it. Clean the dust, and you are enlightened." +But even this great scholar was afraid because the master would know. He already knows +who is enlightened and who is not. Though all he has written is beautiful, it is the very +essence of all the scriptures — mind is like a mirror, and dust gathers on it; remove the +dust, and you are enlightened — this was the whole gist of all the Vedas, but he knew that +was all that it was. He had not known anything, so he was afraid. + + + +He didn’t go directly to the master, but in the night he went to the hut, to his master's hut, +and wrote all the four lines on the wall without signing — without any signature. In this +way, if the master approved and said, "Okay, this is right," then he would say, "I have +written them." If he said, "No! Who has written these lines?" then he would keep silent, +he thought. + +But the master approved. In the morning the master said, "Okay!" He laughed and said, +"Okay! The man who has written this is an enlightened one." + +So the whole monastery began to talk about it. Everyone knew who had written it. They +were discussing and appreciating, and the lines were beautiful — really beautiful. Then +some monks came to the kitchen. They were drinking tea and they were talking, and Hui +Neng was there serving them. He heard what had happened. The moment he heard those +four lines, he laughed. So someone asked, "Why are you laughing, you fool? You do not +know anything; for twelve years you have been serving in the kitchen. Why are you +laughing?" + +No one had even heard him laugh before. He was just taken as an idiot who would not +even talk. So he said, "I cannot write, and I am not an enlightened one either, but these +lines are wrong. So if someone comes with me, I will compose four lines. If someone +comes with me, he can write it on the wall. I cannot write; I do not know writing." + +So someone followed him — just as a joke. A crowd came there and Hui Neng said, +"Write: There is no mind and there is no mirror, so where can the dust gather? One who +knows this is enlightened." + +But the master came out and he said, "You are wrong," to Hui Neng. Hui Neng touched +his feet and returned back to his kitchen. + +In the night when everyone was asleep, the master came to Hui Neng and said, "You are +right, but I could not say so before those idiots — and they are learned idiots. If I had said +that you are appointed as my successor, they would have killed you. + +So escape from here! You are my successor, but do not tell it to anyone. And I knew this +the day you came. Your aura was growing; that was why no meditation was given to you. +There was no need. You were already in meditation. And these twelve years' silence — +not doing anything, not even meditation — emptied you completely of your mind, and the +aura has become full. You have become a full moon. But escape from here! Otherwise +they will kill you. + +"You have been here for twelve years, and the light has been constantly spreading from +you, but no one observed it. And they have been coming to the kitchen, everyone has +been coming to the kitchen every day — thrice, four times. Everyone passes through here; +that is why I posted you in the kitchen. But no one has recognized your aura. So you +escape from here." + +When the spinal column thread is touched, seen, realized, an aura begins to grow around +you. ... IN SUCH BE TRANSFORMED. Be filled with that light and be transformed. +This is also a centering — a centering in the spinal column. If you are body-oriented, this +technique will help you. If you are not body-oriented, it is very difficult, it will be very +difficult to visualize from the inside. Then to look at your body from the inside will be +difficult. + +This sutra will be more helpful for women than for men. They are more body-oriented. +They live more in the body; they feel more. + + + +They can visualize the body more. Women are more body-oriented than men, but for +anyone who can feel the body, who feels the body, who can visualize, who can close his +eyes and feel his body from within, this technique will be very helpful for him. + +Then visualize your spinal column, and in the middle a silver cord running through it. +First it may look like imagination, but by and by you will feel that imagination has +disappeared and your mind has become focused on that spinal column. And then you will +see your own spine. The moment you see the inner core, suddenly you will feel an +explosion of the light within you. + +Sometimes this can also happen without any effort. It happens sometimes. Again, in a +deep sex act it sometimes happens. Tantra knows: in a deep sex act your whole energy +becomes concentrated near the spine. Really, in a deep sex act the spine begins to +discharge electricity. And sometimes, even, if you touch the spine you will get a shock. If +the intercourse is very deep and very loving and long — really, if the two lovers are just in +a deep embrace, silent, non-moving, just being filled with each other, just remaining in a +deep embrace — it happens. It has happened many times that a dark room will suddenly +become filled with light, and both bodies will be surrounded with a blue aura. + +Many, many such cases have happened. Even in some of your experiences it may have +happened, but you may not have noticed that in a dark room, in deep love, suddenly you +feel a light around both of your bodies, and that light spreads and fills the whole room. + +Many times it has happened that suddenly things drop from the table in the room without +any visible cause. And now psychologists say that in a deep sex act, electricity is +discharged. That electricity can have many effects and impacts. Things may suddenly +drop, move or be broken, and even photographs have been taken in which light is visible. +But that light is always concentrated around the spinal column. + +So sometimes, in a deep sex act also — and tantra knows this well and has worked on it — +you may become aware, if you can look within to the thread running in the middle of the +spinal column. And tantra has used the sex act for this realization, but then the sex act has +to be totally different, the quality has to be different. It is not something to be gotten over +with; it is not something to be done for a release; it is not something to be finished +hurriedly; it is not a bodily act then. Then it is a deep spiritual communion. Really, +through two bodies it is a deep meeting of two innernesses, of two subjectivities, +penetrating each other. + +So I will suggest to you to try this technique when in a deep sex act — it will be easier. +Just forget about sex. When in a deep embrace, remain inside. Forget the other person +also, just go inside and visualize your spinal column. It will be easier, because then more +energy is flowing near the spinal column, and the thread is more visible because you are +silent, because your body is at rest. + +Love is the deepest relaxation, but we have made love also a great tension. We have +made it an anxiety, a burden. + +In the wannth of love, filled, relaxed, close your eyes. But men ordinarily do not close +their eyes. Ordinarily, women do close their eyes. That is why I said that women are +more body-oriented while men are not. In a deep embrace in the act of sex, women will +close their eyes. Really, they cannot love with open eyes. With closed eyes, they feel the +body more from within. + +Close your eyes and feel your body. Relax. Concentrate on the spinal column. And this +sutra says very simply, IN SUCH BE TRANSFORMED. And you will be transfonned + + + +through it. +Enough for today. + +THE END. + + + +Chapter 10: Fullfillment through becoming centered + + +Question 1 + +IS SELF-ACTUALIZATION A BASIC NEED? + +There are many questions. The first: IS SELF-ACTUALIZATION A BASIC NEED OF +MAN? First, try to understand what is meant by self-actualization. A. H. Maslow has +used this term "self-actualization." Man is born as potentiality. He is not really actual — +just potential. Man is born as a possibility, not as an actuality. He may become +something; he may attain actualization of his potentiality or he may not attain. The +opportunity may be used or it may not be used. And nature is not forcing you to become +actual. You are free. You can choose to become actual; you can choose not to do +anything about it. Man is born as a seed. Thus, no man is born fulfilled — just with the +possibility of fulfillment. + +If that is the case — and that is the case — then self-actualization becomes a basic need. +Because unless you are fulfilled, unless you become what you can be or what you are +meant to be, unless your destiny is fulfilled, unless you actually attain, unless your seed +becomes a fulfilled tree, you will feel that you are missing something. And everyone is +feeling, that he is missing something. That feeling of missing is really because of this, +that you are not yet actual. + +It is not really that you are missing riches or position, prestige or power. Even if you get +whatsoever you demand — riches, power, prestige, anything — you will feel this constant +sense of something missing within you, because this something missing is not related +with anything outward. + +It is related with your inner growth. Unless you become fulfilled, unless you come to a +realization, a flowering, unless you come to an inner satisfaction in which you feel, "Now +this is what I was meant to be," this sense of something missing will be felt. And you +cannot destroy this feeling of something missing by anything else. + +So self-actualization means a person has become what he was to become. He was born as +a seed and now he has flowered. He has come to the complete growth, an inner growth, +to the inner end. The moment you feel that all your potentialities have become actual, you +will feel the peak of life, of love, of existence itself. + +Abraham Maslow, who has used this term "self-actualization," has also coined another +tenn: "peak experience." When one attains to oneself, he reaches a peak — a peak of bliss. +Then there is no hankering after anything. He is totally content with himself. Now +nothing is lacking; there is no desire, no demand, no movement. Whatsoever he is, he is +totally content with himself. Self-actualization becomes a peak experience, and only a +self-actualized person can attain peak experiences. Then whatsoever he touches, +whatsoever he is doing or not doing — even just existing — is a peak experience for him; +just to be is blissful. Then bliss is not concerned with anything outside, it is just a by- +product of the inner growth. + +A buddha is a self-actualized person. + +That is why we picture Buddha, Mahavir and others — why we have made sculptures, +pictures, depictions of them — sitting on a fully blossomed lotus. That fully blossomed +lotus is the peak of flowering inside. Inside they have flowered and have become fully + + + +blossomed. That inner flowering gives a radiance, a constant showering of bliss from +them. All those who come even within their shadows, all those who come near them feel +a silent milieu around them. + +There is an interesting story about Mahavir. It is a myth, but myths are beautiful and they +say much which cannot be said otherwise. It is reported that when Mahavir would move, +all around him, in an area of about twenty-four miles, all the flowers would bloom. Even +if it was not the season for the flowers, they would bloom. This is simply a poetic +expression, but even if one was not self-actualized, if one were to come in contact with +Mahavir his flowering would become infectious, and one would feel an inner flowering +in oneself also. Even if it was not the right season for a person, even if he was not ready, +he would reflect, he would feel an echo. If Mahavir was near someone, that person would +feel an echo within himself, and he would have a glimpse of what he could be. +Self-actualization is the basic need. And when I say basic, I mean that if all your needs +are fulfilled, all except self-realization, self-actualization, you will feel unfulfilled. + +In fact, if self-actualization happens and nothing else is fulfilled, still you will feel a deep, +total fulfillment. That is why Buddha was a beggar, but yet an emperor. + +Buddha came to Kashi when he became enlightened. The king of Kashi came to see him +and he asked, "I do not see that you have anything, you are just a beggar, yet I feel myself +a beggar in comparison to you. You do not have anything, but the way you walk, the way +you look, the way you laugh makes it seem as if the whole world is your kingdom. And +you have nothing visible — nothing! So where is the secret of your power? You look like +an emperor." Really, no emperor has ever looked like that — as if the whole world +belongs to him. "You are the king, but where is your power, the source?" + +So Buddha said, "It is in me. My power, my source of power, whatsoever you feel around +me is really within me. I do not have anything except myself, but it is enough. I am +fulfilled; now I do not desire anything. I have become desireless." + +Really, a self-actualized person will become desireless. Remember this. Ordinarily we +say that if you become desireless, you will know yourself. The contrary is more true: if +you know yourself, you will become desireless. And the emphasis of tantra is not on +being desireless, but on becoming self-actualized. Then desirelessness follows. + +Desire means you are not fulfilled within, you are missing something so you hanker after +it. + +You go on, from one desire to another, in search of fulfillment. That search never ends +because one desire creates another desire. Really, one desire creates ten desires. If you go +in search of a desireless state of bliss through desires, you will never reach. But if you try +something else — methods of self-actualization, methods of realizing your inner +potentiality, of making them actual — then the more you will become actual the less and +less desires will be felt, because really, they are felt only because you are empty inside. +When you are not empty within, desiring ceases. + +What to do about self-actualization? Two things have to be understood. One: self- +actualization doesn’t mean that if you become a great painter or a great musician or a +great poet you will be self-actualized. Of course, a part of you will be actualized, and +even that gives much contentment. If you have a potentiality of being a good musician, +and if you fulfill it and you become a musician, a part of you will be fulfilled — but not +the total. The remaining humanity within you will remain unfulfilled. You will be +lopsided. One part will have grown, and the remaining will have stayed just like a stone + + + +hanging around your neck. + +Look at a poet. When he is in his poetic mood he looks like a buddha; he forgets himself +completely. The ordinary man in the poetic mood is as if he is no more there. + +So when a poet is in his mood, he has a peak — a partial peak. And sometimes poets have +glimpses which are only possible with enlightened, buddha-like minds. A poet can speak +like a buddha. For example, Khalil Gibran speaks like a buddha but he is not a buddha. + +He is a poet — a great poet. + +So if you see Khalil Gibran through his poetry, he looks like Buddha, Christ or Krishna. +But if you go and meet the man Khalil Gibran, he is just ordinary. He talks about love so +beautifully — even a buddha may not talk so beautifully. But a buddha knows love with +his total being. Khalil Gibran knows love in his poetic flight. When he is on his poetic +flight, he has glimpses of love — beautiful glimpses. He expresses them with rare insight. +But if you go and see the real Khalil Gibran, the man, you will feel a disparity. The poet +and the man are far apart. The poet seems to be something which happens to this man +sometimes, but this man is not the poet. + +That is why poets feel that when they are creating poetry someone else is creating; they +are not creating. They feel as if they have become instruments of some other energy, +some other force. They are no more. This feeling comes because, really, their totality is +not actualized — only a part of it is, a fragment. + +You have not touched the sky. Only one of your fingers has touched the sky, and you +remain rooted on the earth. + +Sometimes you jump, and for a moment you are not on the earth; you have deceived +gravity. But the next moment you are on the earth again. When a poet is feeling fulfilled, +he will have glimpses — partial glimpses. When a musician is feeling fulfilled, he will +have partial glimpses. + +It is said of Beethoven that when he was on the stage he was a different man, altogether +different. Goethe has said that when Beethoven was on stage directing his group, his +orchestra, he looked like a god. It could not be said that he was an ordinary man. He was +not a man at all; he was superhuman. The way he looked, the way he raised his hands, +was all superhuman. But when he came back from the stage he was just an ordinary man. +The man on the stage seemed to be possessed by something else, as if Beethoven was no +more there and some other force had entered into him. Back down from the stage he was +again Beethoven, the man. + +Because of this, poets, musicians, great artists, creative people are more tense — because +they have two types of being. Ordinary man is not so tense because he always lives in +one: he lives on the earth. But poets, musicians, great artists jump; they go beyond +gravity. In certain moments they are not on this earth, they are not part of humanity. They +become part of the buddha world — the land of the buddhas. Then again they are back +here. They have two points of existence; their personalities are split. + + +So every creative artist, every great artist is in a certain way insane. The tension is so +much! The rift, the gap between these two types of existences is so great — unbridgeably +great. Sometimes he is just an ordinary man; sometimes he becomes buddha-like. +Between these two points he is divided, but he has glimpses. + +When I say self-actualization, I do not mean that you should become a great poet or you + + + +should become a great musician. I mean that you should become a total man. I do not say +a great man because a great man is always partial. Greatness in anything is always +partial. One moves and moves and moves in one direction, and in all other dimensions, +all other directions, one remains the same — one becomes lopsided. + +When I say become a total man, I do not mean become a great man. I mean create a +balance, be centered, be fulfilled as a man — not as a musician, not as a poet, not as an +artist, but fulfilled as a man. What does it mean to be fulfilled as a man? A great poet is a +great poet because of great poetry. A great musician is great because of great music. A +great man is a great man because of certain things he has done — he may be a great hero. +A great man in any direction is partial. Greatness is partial, fragmentary. That is why +great men have to face more anguish than ordinary men. + +What is a total man? What is meant by being a whole man, a total man? It means, firstly, +be centered; do not exist without a center. + +This moment you are something, the next moment something else. People come to me +and I generally ask them, "Where do you feel your center — in the heart, in the mind, in +the navel, where? In the sex center? Where? Where do you feel your center?" + +Generally they say, "Sometimes I feel it in the head, sometimes in the heart, sometimes I +do not feel it at all." So I tell them to close their eyes before me and feel it just now. In +the majority of cases this happens: they say, "Just now, for a moment, I feel that I am +centered in the head." But the next moment they are not there. They say, "I am in the +heart." And the next moment the center has slipped, it is somewhere else, at the sex +center or somewhere else. + +Really, you are not centered; you are only momentarily centered. Each moment has its +own center, so you go on shifting. When mind is functioning you feel that the head is the +center. When you are in love, you feel it is the heart. When you are not doing anything +particularly, you are confused — you cannot find out where the center is, because you can +find this out only when you are working, doing something. Then a particular part of the +body becomes the center. But YOU are not centered. If you are not doing anything, you +cannot find where your center of being is. + +A total man is centered. Whatsoever he is doing, he remains in the center. If his mind is +functioning, he is thinking, thinking goes on in the head but he remains centered in the +navel. + +The center is never missed. He uses the head, but he never moves to the head. He uses the +heart, but he never moves to the heart. All these things become instruments, and he +remains centered. + +Secondly, he is balanced. Of course, when one is centered one is balanced. His life is a +deep balance. He is never one-sided, he is never at any extreme — he remains in the +middle. Buddha has called this the middle path. He remains always in the middle. + +A man who is not centered will always move to the extreme. When he eats he will eat +much, he will overeat, or he can fast, but right eating is impossible for him. Fasting is +easy, overeating is okay. He can be in the world, committed, involved, or he can +renounce the world — but he can never be balanced. He can never remain in the middle, +because if you are not centered you do not know what middle means. + +A person who is centered is always in the middle in everything, never at any extreme. +Buddha says his eating is right eating; it is neither overeating, nor fasting. His labor is +right labor — never too much, never too little. Whatsoever he is, he is always balanced. + + + +First thing: a self-actualized person will be centered. + +Second thing: he will be balanced. + +Thirdly: if these two things happen — centering, balance — many things will follow. He +will always be at ease. Whatsoever the situation, the at-easeness will not be lost. + +I say whatsoever the situation — unconditionally, the at-easeness will not be lost, because +one who is at the center is always at ease. Even if death comes, he will be at ease. He will +receive death as one receives any other guest. If misery comes, he will receive it. +Whatsoever happens, it cannot dislodge him from his center. That at-easeness is also a +by-product of being centered. + +For such a man, nothing is trivial, nothing is great; everything becomes sacred, beautiful, +holy — everything! Whatsoever he is doing, whatsoever, it is of ultimate concern — as if +of ultimate concern. Nothing is trivial. He will not say, "This is trivial, this is great." +Really, nothing is great, nor is anything small and trivial. The touch of the man is +significant. A self-actualized person, a balanced, centered person, changes everything. +The very touch makes it great. + +If you observe a buddha, you will see that he walks and he loves walking. If you go to +Bodhgaya where Buddha attained enlightenment, to the bank of the Niranjana — to the +place where he was sitting under the Bodhi tree — you will see that the place of his steps +has been marked. He would meditate for one hour, then he would walk around. In +Buddhist terminology this is called CHAKRAMAN. He would sit under the Bodhi tree, +then he would walk. But he would walk with a serene attitude, as if in meditation. +Someone asked Buddha, "Why do you do this? Sometimes you sit with closed eyes and +meditate, then you walk." + +Buddha said, "Sitting in order to be silent is easy, so I walk. But I carry the same silence +within. I sit, but inside I am the same — silent. I walk, but inside I am the same — silent." +The inner quality is the same... When he meets an emperor and when he meets a beggar, +a buddha is the same, he has the same inner quality. When meeting a beggar he is not +different, when meeting an emperor he is not different; he is the same. The beggar is not +a nobody and the emperor is not a somebody. And really, while meeting a buddha, +emperors have felt like beggars and beggars have felt like emperors. The touch, the man, +the quality remains the same. + +When Buddha was alive, every day in the morning he would say to his disciples, "If you +have to ask anything, ask." The day he was dying, that morning it was the same. He +called his disciples and said, "Now if you want to ask anything, you can ask. And +remember, that this is the last morning. Before this day ends, I will be no more." He was +the same. That was his daily question in the morning. He was the same! The day was the +last, but he was the same. Just as on any other day, he said, "Okay, if you have to ask +anything, you can ask — but this is the last day." + +There was no change of tone, but the disciples began to weep. They forgot to ask +anything. Buddha said, "Why are you weeping? If you would have wept on another day it +would have been okay, but this is the last day. + +By the evening I will be no more, so do not waste time in weeping. Another day it would +have been okay; you could have wasted time. Do not waste your time in weeping. Why +are you weeping? Ask if you have anything to ask." He was the same in life and death. + + + +So thirdly, the self-actualized man is at ease. Life and death are the same; bliss and +misery are the same. Nothing disturbs him, nothing dislocates him from his home, from +his centeredness. To such a man you cannot add anything. You cannot take anything out +of him, you cannot add anything to him — he is fulfilled. His every breath is a fulfilled +breath, silent, blissful. He has attained. He has attained to existence, to being; he has +flowered as a total man. + +This is not a partial flowering. Buddha is not a great poet. Of course, whatsoever he says +is poetry. He is not a poet at all, but even when he moves, walks, it is poetry. He is not a +painter, but whenever he speaks, whatsoever he says becomes a painting. He is not a +musician, but his whole being is music par excellence. The man as a totality has attained. +So now, whatsoever he is doing or not doing... when he is sitting in silence, not doing +anything, even in silence his presence works, creates; it becomes creative. + +Tantra is concerned not with any partial growth, it is concerned with you as a total being. +So three things are basic: you must be centered, rooted, and balanced; that is, always in +the middle — of course, without any effort. + +If there is effort you are not balanced. And you must be at ease — at ease in the universe, +at home in the existence, and then many things follow. This is a basic need, because +unless this need is fulfilled you are a man only in name. You are a man as a possibility, +you are not actually a man. You can be, you have the potentiality, but the potentiality has +to be made actual. + +The second question: + +Question 2 + +KINDLY EXPLAIN CONTEMPLATION, CONCENTRATION AND MEDITATION. +'Contemplation' means directed thinking. We all think; that is not contemplation. That +thinking is undirected, vague, leading nowhere. Really, our thinking is not contemplation, +but what Freudians call association. One thought leads to another without any direction +from you. The thought itself leads to another because of association. + +You see a dog crossing the street. The moment you see the dog, your mind starts thinking +about dogs. The dog has led you to this thought, and then the mind has many +associations. When you were a child, you were afraid of a particular dog. That dog comes +to the mind and then the childhood comes to the mind. Then dogs are forgotten; then just +by association you begin to daydream about your childhood. Then the childhood goes on +being connected with other things, and you move in circles. + +Whenever you are at ease, try to go backwards from your thinking to where the thoughts +came from. + +Go back, retrace the steps. Then you will see that another thought was there, and that led +to this. And they are not logically connected, because how is a dog on the street +connected with your childhood? + +There is no logical connection — only association in your mind. If I was crossing the +street, the same dog would not lead me to my childhood, it would lead to something else. +In a third person it would lead to still something else. Everyone has associated chains in +the mind. With any one person some happening, some accident will lead to the chain. +Then the mind begins to function like a computer. Then one thing leads to another, +another leads to another, and you go on, and the whole day you are doing that. + +Write down on a sheet of paper whatsoever comes to your mind, honestly. You will be +just amazed what is happening in your mind. There is no relation between two thoughts, + + + +and you go on doing this type of thinking. You call this thinking? This is just association +of one thought with another, and they lead themselves... you are led. + +Thinking becomes contemplation when it moves not through association, but is directed. +You are working on a particular problem — then you bracket out all associations. You +move on that problem only, you direct your mind. The mind will try to escape to any +bypath, to any side route, to some association. You cut off all the side routes; on only one +road you direct your mind. + + +A scientist working on a problem is in contemplation. A logician working on a problem, +a mathematician working on a problem is in contemplation. A poet contemplates a +flower. Then the whole world is bracketed out, and only that flower and the poet remains, +and he moves with the flower. Many things from side routes will attract, but he does not +allow his mind to move anywhere. Mind moves in one line, directed. This is +contemplation. + +Science is based on contemplation. Any logical thinking is contemplation: thought is +directed, thinking guided. Ordinary thinking is absurd. Contemplation is logical, rational. +Then there is 'concentration’. Concentration is staying at one point. It is not thinking; it is +not contemplation. It is really being at one point, not allowing the mind to move at all. In +ordinary thinking mind moves as a madman. In contemplation the madman is led, +directed; he cannot escape anywhere. In concentration the mind is not allowed to move. + +In ordinary thinking, it is allowed to move anywhere; in contemplation, it is allowed to +move only somewhere; in concentration, it is not allowed to move, it is only allowed to +be at one point. The whole energy, the whole movement stops, sticks to one point. + +Yoga is concerned with concentration, ordinary mind with undirected thinking, the +scientific mind with directed thinking. The yogic mind has its thinking focused, fixed at +one point; no movement is allowed. + + +And then there is ’meditation’. In ordinary thinking, mind is allowed to move anywhere; +in contemplation, it is allowed only in one direction, all other directions are cut off. In +concentration, it is not allowed to move even in one direction; it is allowed only to +concentrate on one point. And in meditation, mind is not allowed at all. Meditation is no- +mind. + +These are four stages: ordinary thinking, contemplation, concentration, meditation. +Meditation means no-mind — not even concentration is allowed. Mind itself is not +allowed to be! That is why meditation cannot be grasped by mind. Up to concentration +mind has a reach, an approach. Mind can understand concentration, but mind cannot +understand meditation. Really, mind is not allowed at all. In concentration, mind is +allowed to be at one point. In meditation, even that point is taken away. In ordinary +thinking, all directions are open. In contemplation, only one direction is open. In +concentration, only one point is open — no direction. In meditation, even that point is not +open: mind is not allowed to be. + +Ordinary thinking is the ordinary state of mind, and meditation is the highest possibility. +The lowest one is ordinary thinking, association, and the highest, the peak, is meditation +— no-mind. + + +And with the second question, it is also asked: CONTEMPLATION AND + + + +CONCENTRATION ARE MENTAL PROCESSES. + + +HOW CAN MENTAL PROCESSES HELP IN ACHIEVING A STATE OF NO-MIND? +The question is significant. Mind asks, how can mind itself go beyond mind? How can +any mental process help to achieve something which is not of the mind? It looks +contradictory. How can your mind try, make an effort to create a state which is not of +mind? + +Try to understand. When mind is, what is there? A process of thinking. When there is no- +mind, what is there? No process of thinking. If you go on decreasing your process of +thinking, if you go on dissolving your thinking, by and by, slowly, you are reaching no- +mind. Mind means thinking; no mind means non-thinking. And mind can help. Mind can +help in committing suicide. You can commit suicide; you never ask how a man who is +alive can help himself to be dead. You can help yourself to be dead — everyone is trying +to help. You can help yourself to be dead, and you are alive. Mind can help to be no- +mind. How can mind help? + +If the process of thinking becomes more and more dense, then you are proceeding from +mind to more mind. If the process of thinking becomes less dense, is decreased, is slowed +down, you are helping yourself toward no-mind. It depends on you. And mind can be a +help, because really, mind is what you are doing with your consciousness this very +moment. If you leave your consciousness alone, without doing anything with it, it +becomes meditation. + + +So there are two possibilities: either slowly, gradually you decrease your mind, by and +by. If one percent is decreased, then you have ninety-nine percent mind and one percent +no-mind within you. It is as if you have removed some furniture from your room — then +some space is created there. Then you remove more furniture, and more space is created +there. When you have removed all the furniture, the whole room becomes space. + +Really, space is not created by removing the furniture, the space was already there. It is +only that the space was occupied by the furniture. When you remove the furniture, no +space comes in from outside; the space was there, occupied by furniture. You have +removed the furniture, and the space is recovered, reclaimed. Deep down mind is space +occupied, filled by thoughts. If you remove some thoughts, space is created — or +discovered, or reclaimed. If you go on removing your thoughts, by and by you go on +regaining your space. This space is meditation. + +Slowly it can be done — suddenly also. There is no need to go on for lives together +removing the furniture, because there are problems. When you start to remove the +furniture, one percent space is created and ninety-nine percent space is occupied. That +ninety-nine percent occupied space will not feel good about the unoccupied space; it will +try to fill it. So one goes on slowly decreasing thoughts and then again creating new +thoughts. + + +In the morning you sit for meditation for some time; you slow down your process of +thought. Then you go to the market, and again there is a rush of thoughts. The space is +filled again. The next day you again do this, and you go on doing this — throwing it out, +and inviting it in again. + +You can also throw all the furniture out suddenly. It is your decision. It is difficult + + + +because you have become accustomed to the furniture. You may feel uncomfortable +without the furniture; you will not know what to do with that space. You may become +afraid even to move in that space. You have never moved in such freedom. + +Mind is a conditioning. We have become accustomed to thoughts. Have you ever +observed — or if you have not observed, then observe — that you go on repeating the +same thoughts every day. You are like a gramophone record, and then too not a fresh, +new one — old. You go on and on repeating the same things. Why? What is the use of it? +Only one use, it is just a long habit; you feel you are doing something. + +You are lying on your bed just waiting for sleep to come and the same things are repeated +every day. Why are you doing this? It helps in a way. Old habits, conditionings, help. A +child needs a toy. If the toy is given to him, he will fall into sleep; then you can take +away the toy. But if the toy is not there, the child cannot fall into sleep. + +It is a conditioning. The moment the toy is given to him, it triggers something in his +mind. Now he is ready to fall into sleep. + +The same is happening with you. The toys may differ. One person cannot fall into sleep +unless he starts chanting, "Ram, Ram, Ram..." He cannot fall into sleep! This is a toy. If +he chants, "Ram, Ram, Ram..." the toy is given to him; he can fall into sleep. + +You feel difficulty in falling asleep in a new room. If you are accustomed to sleeping in +particular clothes, then you will need those particular clothes every day. Psychologists +say that if you sleep in a nightgown and it is not given to you, you will feel difficulty in +falling asleep. Why? If you have never slept naked and you are told to sleep naked, you +will not feel at ease. Why? There is no relationship between nakedness and sleep, but for +you there is a relationship, an old habit. With old habits one feels at ease, comfortable. +Thinking patterns are also just habits. You feel comfortable — the same thoughts every +day, the same routine. You feel everything is okay. + +You have investments in your thoughts — that is the problem. Your furniture is not just +rubbish to be thrown; you have invested many, many things in it. All the furniture can be +thrown immediately: it can be done! There are sudden methods of which we will speak. +Immediately, this very moment, you can be freed of your whole mental furniture. + +But then you will be suddenly vacant, empty, and you will not know who you are. Now +you will not know what to do because for the first time your old patterns are no more. + +The shock may be too sudden. You may even die, or you may go mad. + +That is why sudden methods are not used. Unless one is ready, sudden methods are not +used. One may go suddenly mad because one may miss all the moorings. The past drops +immediately, and when past drops immediately you cannot conceive of the future, +because the future was always conceived of in terms of the past. + +Only the present remains, and you have never been in the present. Either you were in the +past or in the future. So when you are just in the present for the first time, you will feel +you have gone berserk, mad. That is why sudden methods are not used unless you are +working in a school, unless you are working with a master in a group, unless you are +totally devoted, unless you have dedicated your whole life for meditation. + +So gradual methods are good. They take a long time, but by and by you become +accustomed to space. You begin to feel the space and the beauty of it, and the bliss of it, +and then your furniture is removed by and by. + +So from ordinary thinking it is good to become contemplative — that is the gradual +method. From contemplation it is good to move to concentration — that is the gradual + + + +method. + + +And from concentration it is good to take a jump into meditation. Then you are moving +slowly, feeling the ground at every step. And when you are really rooted in one step, only +then do you begin to go for the next one. It is not a jump, it is a gradual growth. So these +four things — ordinary thinking, contemplation, concentration, meditation — are four +steps. + +The third question: + +Question 3 + +IS THE DEVELOPMENT OF THE NAVEL CENTER EXCLUSIVELY FREE AND +SEPARATE FROM THE GROWTH OF THE HEART AND HEAD CENTERS, OR +DOES THE NAVEL CENTER DEVELOP SIMULTANEOUSLY WITH THE +GROWTH OF THE HEART AND THE HEAD? AND ALSO, PLEASE EXPLAIN IN +WHICH WAY THE TRAINING AND TECHNIQUES FOR THE NAVEL CENTER +WILL DIFFER FROM THE TRAINING AND TECHNIQUES FOR THE +DEVELOPMENT OF THE HEART AND HEAD CENTERS. + +One basic thing to be understood: the heart and head centers are to be developed, not the +navel center. The navel center is just to be discovered; it is not to be developed. The +navel center is already there. You have to uncover, or discover it. It is there fully +developed, you are not to develop it. The heart center and the head center are +developments. They are not there to be discovered, they have to be developed. Society, +culture, education, conditioning help to develop them. + +But you are bom with a navel center. Without the navel center you cannot be. You can be +without the heart center, you can be without the head center. + +They are not necessities; it is good to have them, but you can be without them. It will be +very inconvenient, but you can be without them. However, without the navel center you +cannot be. It is not just a necessity, it is your life. + +So there are techniques for how to develop the heart center — how to grow in love, how +to grow in sensitivity, how to become a more sensitive mind. There are methods and +techniques for how to become more rational, more logical. Reason can be developed, +emotion can be developed, but existence cannot be developed. It is already there; it has to +be discovered. + +Many things are implied in this. One: it may not be possible for you to have a mind, a +reasoning faculty, like Einstein. But you can become a buddha. Einstein is a mind center +functioning at its perfection. Or someone else... a lover. A Majnu is functioning at his +heart center in its perfection. You may not be able to become a Majnu, but you can +become a buddha because buddhahood is not to be developed in you: it is already there. + +It is concerned with the basic center, the original center — the navel. It is already there. +You are already a buddha, only unaware. + +You are not already an Einstein. You will have to try, and then too there is no guarantee +that you will become one. There is no guarantee because really, it seems impossible. Why +does it seem impossible? Because to develop the head of Einstein needs the same growth, +the same milieu, the same training as was given to him. + +It cannot be repeated because it is unrepeatable. First you will have to find the same +parents, because the training begins in the womb. It is difficult to find the same parents — +impossible. How can you find the same parents, the same date of birth, the same home, + + + +the same associates, the same friends? You will have to repeat the life of Einstein exactly +— ditto! If even one point is missing, you will be a different man. + +So that is impossible. Any individual is born only once in this world because the same +situation cannot be repeated. The same situation is such a big phenomenon. It means +there must be the same world in the same moment! It is not possible — it is impossible. +And you are already here, so whatsoever you do, your past will be in it. You cannot +become an Einstein. Individuality cannot be repeated. + +Buddha is not an individual, Buddha is a phenomenon. No individual factors are +meaningful; just your being is enough to be a buddha. The center is already there, +functioning; you have to discover it. So the techniques for the heart are techniques for +developing something, and the techniques concerning the navel center are concerned with +uncovering. You have to uncover. You are already a buddha, you only have to know the +fact. + +So there are two types of persons — buddhas who know that they are buddhas, and +buddhas who do not know that they are buddhas. + +But all are buddhas. As far as existence is concerned, everyone is the same. Only in +existence is there communism; in everything else communism is absurd. No one is equal, +inequality is basic in everything else. So it may look like a paradox if I say that only +religion leads to communism, but I mean THIS communism: this deep equality of +existence, of being. In this you are equal to Buddha, to Christ, to Krishna, but in no other +way are two individuals equal. Inequality is basic as far as outer life is concerned; +equality is basic as far as inner life is concerned. + +So these one hundred and twelve methods are not really for developing the navel center; +they are for uncovering it. That is why instantly sometimes one becomes a buddha, +because there is no question of creating something. If you can look at yourself, if you can +go deep down into yourself, all that you need is already there. It is already the case, so +the only question is how to be thrown to that point where you are already a buddha. +Meditation doesn’t help you to be a buddha, it only helps you to become aware of your +buddhahood. + +One question more: + +Question 4 + +ARE ALL ENLIGHTENED ONES NAVEL CENTERED? FOR EXAMPLE, IS +KRISHNAMURTI HEAD OR NAVEL CENTERED? WAS RAMAKRISHNA HEART +OR NAVEL CENTERED? + +Every enlightened one is navel centered, but the expression of each enlightened one may +flow through other centers. + +Understand the distinction clearly. Every enlightened one is navel centered; there is no +other possibility. But the expression is a different thing. + +Ramakrishna expresses himself from the heart. He uses his heart as the vehicle of his +message. Whatsoever he has found at the navel he expresses through his heart. He sings, +he dances — that is his way of expressing his bliss. The bliss is found at the navel, +nowhere else. He is centered at the navel, but how to say to others that he is centered at +the navel? He uses his heart for the expression. + +Krishnamurti uses his head for that expression; that is why their expressions are +contradictory. If you believe in Ramakrishna you cannot believe in Krishnamurti. If you +believe in Krishnamurti you cannot believe in Ramakrishna, because belief is always + + + +centered in the expression, not in the experience. Ramakrishna looks childish to a man +who thinks with reason: "What is this nonsense — dancing, singing? What is he doing? +Buddha never danced, and this Ramakrishna is dancing. He looks childish." + +To reason the heart always looks childish, but to the heart reason looks useless, +superficial. Whatsoever Krishnamurti says is the same. The experience is the same as it +was for Ramakrishna or Chaitanya or Meera. But if the person is head centered, his +explanation, expression is rational. If Ramakrishna sees Krishnamurti he will say, "Come +on, let us dance. + +Why waste your time? Through dance it can be expressed more easily, and it goes +deeper." Krishnamurti will say, "Dance? One gets hypnotized through dance. Do not +dance. Analyze! Reason! Reason it out, analyze, be aware." + +These are different centers being used for expression, but the experience is the same. One +can paint the experience — Zen masters have painted their experience. When they became +enlightened, they would paint it. They would not say anything, they would just paint it. +The RISHIS, sages, of the Upanishads have created beautiful poetry. When they became +enlightened they would create poetry. Chaitanya used to dance; Ramakrishna used to +sing. Buddha and Mahavir used the head, reason, to explain, to say whatsoever they had +experienced. They created great systems of thought to express their experience. + +But the experience is neither rational nor emotional: it is beyond both. There have been +few persons, very few, who could express through both the centers. You can find many +Krishnamurtis, you can find many Ramakrishnas, but only sometimes does it happen that +a person can express through both the centers. Then the person becomes confusing. Then +you are never at ease with that man because you cannot conceive of any relationship +between the two; they appear contradictory. + +If I say something, when I say it I must say it through reason. So I attract many people +who are rationalistic, head-oriented. + +Then one day they see that I allow singing and dancing and they become uncomfortable: +"What is this? There is no relationship..." But to me there is no contradiction. Dancing is +also a way of speaking — and sometimes a deeper way. Reason is also a way of speaking +— and sometimes a very clear way. So both are ways of expression. + +If you see Buddha dancing, you will be in difficulty. If you see Mahavir playing on a +flute, standing naked, then you will not be able to sleep. What happened to Mahavir? Has +he gone mad? With Krishna the flute is okay, but with Mahavir it is absolutely +unbelievable. A flute in the hand of Mahavir? Inconceivable! You cannot even imagine +it. But the reason is not that there is any contradiction between Mahavir and Krishna, +Buddha and Chaitanya; it is due to difference of expression. Buddha will attract a +particular type of mind — the head-oriented mind — and Chaitanya and Ramakrishna will +attract quite the opposite — the heart-oriented mind. + +But difficulties arise. A person like me creates difficulties: I attract both, and then no one +is at ease. Whenever I am talking, then the head-oriented person is at ease, but whenever +I allow the other type of expression the head-oriented one becomes uneasy. And the same +happens to the other — when some emotional method is used the heart-oriented one feels +at ease, but when I discuss, when I reason out something, then he is absent, he is not here. + +He says, "This is not for me." + +One lady came just a day before, and she said, "I was at Mount Abu, but then there was a + + + +difficulty. The first day when I heard you it was beautiful, it appealed to me; I was just +thrilled. But then I saw KIRTAN — devotional chanting and dancing — so I decided to +leave immediately; that was not for me. I went to the bus station, but then there was a +problem. I wanted to hear you talk, so I came back. I didn’t want to miss what you were +saying." She must have been in difficulty. She said to me, "It was so contradictory." + +It appeared so because these centers are contradictory, but this contradiction is in YOU. +Your head is not at ease with your heart; they are in conflict. Because of your inner +conflict, Ramakrishna and Krishnamurti appear to be in conflict. Create a bridge between +your head and your heart, and then you will know that these are mediums. + +Ramakrishna was absolutely uneducated — no development of reason. He was pure heart. +Only one center was developed, the heart. Krishnamurti is pure reason. He was in the +hands of some of the most vigorous rationalists — Annie Besant, Leadbeater and the +Theosophists. They were the great system-makers of this century. Really, theosophy is +one of the greatest systems ever created, absolutely rational. He was brought up by +rationalists; he is pure reason. Even if he talks about heart and love, the very expression +is rational. + + +Ramakrishna is different. Even if he talks about reason, he is absurd. Totapuri came to +him, and Ramakrishna began to learn VEDANTA from him. So Totapuri said, "Leave all +this devotional nonsense. Leave this Kali, the mother, absolutely. Unless you leave all +this I am not going to teach you, because VEDANTA is not devotion, it is knowledge." + +So Ramakrishna said, "Okay, but allow me one moment so that I can go and ask the +mother if I may leave everything, this whole nonsense. Allow me one moment to ask the +mother." + +This is a heart-oriented man. Even to leave the mother he will have to ask her. "And," he +said, "she is so loving, she will allow me, so you do not bother." Totapuri could not +understand what he had said. Ramakrishna said, "She is so loving, she has never said no +to me at any time. If I say, 'Mother, I am to leave you because now I am learning +VEDANTA and I cannot do this devotional nonsense, so allow me please,' she will allow. +She will give me total freedom to drop it." + +Create a bridge between your head and heart, and then you will see that all those who +have ever become enlightened speak the same thing, only their languages may differ. + + +THE END. + + + +Chapter 11: Techniques to penetrate the inner centers + + +15. CLOSING THE SEVEN OPENINGS OF THE HEAD WITH YOUR HANDS, A +SPACE BETWEEN YOUR EYES BECOMES ALL INCLUSIVE. + +16. BLESSED ONE, AS SENSES ARE ABSORBED IN THE HEART, REACH THE +CENTER OF THE LOTUS. + +17. UNMINDING MIND, KEEP IN THE MIDDLE - UNTIL. + +Man is as if he is a circle without a center. His life is superficial; his life is only on the +circumference. You live on the outside, you never live within. You cannot, unless a +center is found. You cannot live within, really you have no within. You are without a +center, you have only the without. That is why we go on talking about the within, about +how to go in, how to know oneself, how to penetrate inwards, but these words do not +carry any authentic meaning. You know the meaning of the words, but you cannot feel +what they mean because you are never in. Y ou have never been in. + +Even when you are alone, in your mind you are in a crowd. When no one is there outside, +still you are not within. You go on thinking of others; you go on moving outwards. Even +while asleep you are dreaming of others, you are not within. Only in very deep sleep, +when there is no dreaming, are you within; but then you become unconscious. Remember +this fact: when you are conscious you are never within, and when you are within in deep +sleep you become unconscious. So your whole consciousness consists of the without. + +And whenever we talk about going within, the words are understood but the meaning is +not — because the meaning is not carried by the words, the meaning comes through +experience. + +Words are without meaning. When I say ’within’, you understand the word — but only the +word, not the meaning. You do not know what within is, because consciously you have +never been within. Your mind is constantly outgoing. You do not have any feel of what +the inner means or what it is. + +That is what I mean when I say that you are a circle without a center — a circumference +only. The center is there, but you drop into it only when you are not conscious. + +Otherwise, when you are conscious you move outwards, and because of this your life is +never intense; it cannot be. It is just lukewarm. You are alive as if dead, or both +simultaneously. You are deadly alive — living a dead-like life. You are existing at the +minimum — not at the maximum peak, but at the minimum. You can say, "I am," that is +all. You are not dead; that is what you mean by being alive. + +But life can never be known at the circumference. Life can be known only at the center. +On the circumference only lukewann life is possible. So really, you live a very +inauthentic life, and then even death becomes inauthentic — because one who has not +really lived cannot really die. Only authentic life can become authentic death. + +Then death is beautiful: anything authentic is beautiful. Even life, if it is inauthentic, is +bound to be ugly. And your life is ugly, just rotten. Nothing happens. You simply go on +waiting, hoping that something will happen somewhere, someday. + +At this very moment there is just emptiness, and every moment has been like that in the +past — just empty. You are just waiting for the future, hoping that something will happen +someday, just hoping. Then every moment is lost. It has not happened in the past, so it is + + + +not going to happen in the future either. It can happen only in this moment, but then you +will need an intensity, a penetrating intensity. Then you will need to be rooted in the +center. Then the periphery will not do. Then you will have to find your moment. Really, +we never think about what we are, and whatsoever we think is just hokum. + +Once I lived with a professor on a university campus. One day he came and he was very +upset, so I asked, "What is the matter?" + +He said, "I feel feverish." + +I was reading something, so I said to him, "Go to sleep. Take this blanket and rest." + +He went to the bed, but after a few minutes he said, "No, I am not feverish. Really, I am +angry. Someone has insulted me, and I feel much violence against him." + +So I said, "Why did you say that you are feeling feverish?" + +He said, "I couldn’t acknowledge the fact that I was angry, but really I am angry. + +There is no fever." He threw off the blanket. + +Then I said, "Okay, if you are angry then take this pillow. Beat it and be violent with it. +Let your violence be released. And if the pillow is not enough, then I am available. You +can beat me, and let this anger be thrown out." + +He laughed, but the laughter was false — just painted on his face. It came on his face and +then disappeared, it never penetrated in. It never came from within; it was just a painted +smile. But the laughter, even false laughter, created a gap. He said, "Not really... I am not +really angry. Someone said something before others, and I felt very much embarrassed. +Really, this is the thing." + +So I said to him, "You have changed your statement about your own feelings three times +within half an hour. You said you were feeling feverish, then you said you were angry, +and now you say that you are not angry but just embarrassed. Which one is real?" + +He said, "Really, I am embarrassed." + +I said, "Which? When you said you were feverish, you were also certain about that. + +When you said you were angry, you were also certain about that. And you are also +certain about this. Are you one person or many persons? For how long a time is this +certainty going to continue?" + +So the man said, "Really, I do not know what I am feeling. What it is, I do not know. I +am simply disturbed. Whether to call it anger or embarrassment or what, I do not know. + +And this is not the moment to discuss it with me." He said, "Leave me alone. You have +made my situation philosophical. You are discussing what is real, what is authentic, and I +am feeling very much disturbed." + +This is not only with some other person — X, Y or Z — it is with you. You are never +certain, because certainty comes from being centered. You are not even certain about +yourself. It is impossible to be certain about others when you are never certain about +yourself. There is just a vagueness, a cloudiness; nothing is certain. + +Someone was here just a few days ago, and he said to me, "I am in love with someone, +and I want to marry her." I looked into his eyes deeply for a few minutes without saying +anything. He became restless and he said, "Why are you looking at me? I feel so +awkward." I continued looking. He said, "Do you think that my love is false?" I didn’t say +anything, I just continued looking. He said, "Why do you feel that this marriage is not +going to be good?" He said by himself, "I had not really thought it over very much, and +that is why I have come to you. Really, I do not know whether I am in love or not." + +I had not said a single word. I was just looking into his eyes. But he became restless, and + + + +things which were inside began to come up, to bubble up. + +You are not certain, you cannot be certain about anything; neither about your love, nor +about your hate, nor about your friendships. + +There is nothing which you can be certain about because you have no center. Without a +center there is no certainty. All your feelings of certainty are false and momentary. One +moment you will feel that you are certain, but the next moment the certainty will have +gone because in each moment you have a different center. You do not have a permanent +center, a crystallized center. Each moment is an atomic center, so each moment has its +own self. + +George Gurdjieff used to say that man is a crowd. Personality is just a deception because +you are not a person, you are many persons. So when one person speaks in you, that is a +momentary center. The next moment there is another. With every moment, with every +atomic situation, you feel certain, and you never become aware that you are just a flux — +many waves without any center. Then in the end you will feel that life has been just a +wastage. It is bound to be. There is just a wastage, just a wandering — purposeless, +meaningless. + +Tantra, yoga, religion... their basic concern is how first to discover the center, how first to +be an individual. They are concerned with how to find the center which persists in every +situation. Then, as life goes on moving without, as the flux of life goes on and on, as +waves come and go, the center persists inside. Then you remain one — rooted, centered. +These sutras are techniques to find the center. + +The center is already there, because there is no possibility of being a circle without a +center. The circle can exist only with a center, so the center is only forgotten. It is there, +but we are not aware. It is there, but we do not know how to look at it. We do not know +how to focus the consciousness on it. + +The third technique about centering: CLOSING THE SEVEN OPENINGS OF THE +HEAD WITH YOUR HANDS, A SPACE BETWEEN YOUR EYES BECOMES ALL +INCLUSIVE. + +This is one of the oldest techniques — very much used, and one of the simplest also. + +Close all the openings of the head — eyes, ears, nose, mouth. When all the openings of +the head are closed, your consciousness, which is continuously flowing out, is stopped +suddenly: it cannot move out. + +You may not have observed, but even if you stop your breathing for a moment, suddenly +your mind will stop — because with breathing mind moves on. That is a conditioning with +the mind. You must understand what 'conditioning’ means, then only will this sutra be +easy to understand. + +Pavlov, one of the most famous Russian psychologists, has created this tenn +"conditioning" — or "conditioned reflex" — a day-to-day word used all over the world. +Everyone who is acquainted with psychology even a little knows the word. Two +processes of thought — any two processes — can become so associated that if you start +with one, the other is also triggered. + + +This is the famous Pavlovian example. Pavlov worked with a dog. He found that if you +put dog food before a dog, its saliva begins to flow. The tongue of the dog comes out and + + + +he begins to get ready, prepared for eating. This is natural. When he is seeing the food, or +even imagining the food, saliva starts flowing. But Pavlov conditioned this process with +another. Whenever the saliva would start to flow and the food was there, he would do +some other things. For example, he would ring a bell, and the dog would listen to the bell +ringing. For fifteen days, whenever the food was placed, the bell would ring. Then on the +sixteenth day food was not placed before the dog, only the bell was rung. But still the +saliva started flowing and the tongue came out, as if the food was there. + +But there was no food, only the bell ringing. There is no natural association between the +bell ringing and saliva, the natural association is with food. But now the continuous +ringing of the bell had become associated with it, and even the ringing of the bell would +start the process. + +According to Pavlov — and he is right — our whole life is a conditioned process. The +mind is a conditioning. Thus, if you stop something in the conditioning, every other +associated thing also stops. + +For example, you have never thought without breathing. Thinking has always been with +breathing. + +You are not conscious of breathing, but breathing is there continuously, day and night. +Every thought, every thinking process is associated with breathing. If you stop your +breathing suddenly, thought will also stop. And if all the seven holes — the seven +openings of the head — are closed, your consciousness suddenly cannot move out. It +remains in, and that remaining in creates a space between your eyes. That space is known +as the third eye. + +If all the openings of the head are closed you cannot move out, because you have always +been moving out from these openings. You remain in, and with your consciousness +remaining in it becomes concentrated between these two eyes, between these two +ordinary eyes. It remains in between these two eyes, focused. That spot is known as the +third eye. + +This space BECOMES ALL INCLUSIVE. This sutra says that in this space everything is +included; the whole existence is included. If you can feel the space, you have felt all. +Once you can feel inside this space between the two eyes, then you have known +existence, the totality of it, because this inner space is all inclusive. Nothing is left out of +it. + +The Upanishads say, "Knowing the one, one knows all." These two eyes can only see the +finite. The third eye sees the infinite. These two eyes can only see the material. The third +eye sees the immaterial, the spiritual. With these two eyes you can never feel the energy, +you can never see the energy; you can see only matter. + +But with the third eye, energy as such is seen. + +This closing of the openings is a way of centering, because once the stream of +consciousness cannot flow out, it remains at its source. That source of consciousness is +the third eye. If you are centered at the third eye, many things happen. The first is +discovering that the whole world is in you. + +Swami Ramateertha used to say that "The sun moves in me, the stars move in me, the +moon rises in me. The whole universe is in me." When he said this for the first time, his +disciples thought he had gone crazy. How can stars be in Ramateertha? + +He was talking about the third eye, the inner space. When for the first time the inner +space becomes illumined, this is the feeling. When you see that everything is in you, you + + + +become the universe. + +The third eye is not part of your physical body. The space between our two eyes is not a +space which is confined in your body. It is the infinite space which has penetrated in you. +Once this space is known, you will never be the same person again. The moment you +know this inner space, you have known the deathless. Then there is no death. + +When you know this space for the first time, your life will be authentic, intense, for the +first time really alive. Now no security is needed, now no fear is possible. Now you +cannot be killed. Now nothing can be taken away from you. + +Now the whole universe belongs to you: you are the universe. Those who have known +this inner space, they have cried in ecstasy, "AHAM BRAHMASMI! I am the universe, I +am the existence." + +The Sufi mystic Mansoor was murdered only because of this experience of the third eye. +When for the first time he became aware of this inner space, he started crying, "I am +God!" In India he would have been worshipped, because India has known many, many +persons who have come to know this inner space of the third eye. But in a Mohammedan +country it was difficult. And Mansoor's statement that "I am God — ANA'L HAK!" — +was taken to be something anti-religious, because Mohammedanism cannot conceive that +man and God can become one. Man is man — the created — and God is the creator, so +how can the created become the creator? So this statement of Mansoor's, "I am God," +could not be understood; thus, he was murdered. But when he was being murdered, +killed, he was laughing. So someone asked, "Why are you laughing, Mansoor?" + +Mansoor is reported to have said, "I am laughing because you are not killing me, and you +cannot kill me. You are deceived by this body, but I am not this body. I am the creator of +this universe, and it was my finger which moved this whole universe in the beginning." + +In India he would have been understood easily. The language has been known for +centuries and centuries. + +We have known that a moment comes when the inner space is known. Then one simply +goes mad. And this realization is so certain that even if you kill a Mansoor he will not +change his statement — because really, you cannot kill him as far as he is concerned. Now +he has become the whole. There is no possibility of destroying him. + +After Mansoor, Sufis learned that it is good to be silent. So in Sufi tradition, after +Mansoor, it has been consistently taught to disciples, "Whenever you come to the third +eye, remain silent and do not say anything. Whenever this happens, then keep quiet. Do +not say anything, or just go on formally saying things which people believe." + +So Islam has now two traditions. One is just the ordinary, the outward, the exoteric; +another, the real Islam, is Sufism — the esoteric. But Sufis remain silent, because since +Mansoor they have learned that to talk in that language which comes when the third eye +opens is to be unnecessarily in difficulty — and it helps no one. + +This sutra says: CLOSING THE SEVEN OPENINGS OF THE HEAD WITH YOUR +HANDS, A SPACE BETWEEN YOUR EYES BECOMES ALL INCLUSIVE. Your +inner space becomes all the space. + +The fourth technique: + +BLESSED ONE, AS SENSES ARE ABSORBED IN THE HEART, REACH THE +CENTER OF THE LOTUS. + +Every technique is useful for a certain type of mind. The technique we have been + + + +discussing, the third — closing the openings of the head — can be used by many. + + +It is very simple and not very dangerous. You can use it very easily, and there is also no +need to close the openings with your hands. Closing is needed, so you can use ear plugs +and you can use a mask for the eyes. The real thing is to close the openings of your head +completely for a few moments — for a few moments or for a few seconds. Try it. Do not +practice it — only suddenly is it helpful. When it is sudden it is helpful. When lying in +your bed, suddenly close all your openings for a few seconds, and see what is happening +within. + +When you feel suffocated, go on — unless it becomes absolutely unbearable, because +breathing will be closed. Go on, unless it becomes absolutely unbearable. And when it is +absolutely unbearable, you will not be able to close the openings any more, so you need +not worry. The inner force will throw all the openings open. So as far as you are +concerned, continue. When the suffocation comes, that is the moment — because the +suffocation will break the old associations. If you can continue for a few moments more, +it would be good. It will be difficult and arduous, and you will feel that you are going to +die — but do not be afraid, because you cannot die. You cannot die just by closing the +openings. But when you feel now you are going to die, that is the moment. + +If you can persist in that moment, suddenly everything will be illumined. + +You will feel the inner space which goes on spreading, and the whole is included in it. +Then open your openings. Go on trying it again and again. Whenever you have time, try +it. But do not practice it. You can practice stopping the breath for a few moments. But +practice will not help, a sudden jerk is needed. In that jerk, the flow into your old +channels of consciousness stops, and a new thing becomes possible. + +Many practice this even today — many persons all over India. But they practice it, and it +is a sudden method. If you practice, then nothing will happen. If I throw you out of this +room suddenly, your thoughts will stop. But if we practice it daily, then nothing will +happen. It will become a mechanical habit. So do not practice it. Just try it whenever you +can. Then suddenly, by and by, you will become aware of an inner space. That inner +space comes only to your consciousness when you are on the verge of death. When you +are feeling, "Now I cannot continue for a single moment; now death is near," that is the +right moment. Persist! Do not be afraid. Death is not so easy. At least up until now not a +single person has died using this method. + +There are built-in securities, that is why you cannot die. Before death one becomes +unconscious. If you are conscious and feeling that you are going to die, do not be afraid. +You are still conscious, so you cannot die. And if you become unconscious, then your +breath will start. + +Then you cannot prevent it. So you can use ear plugs, etc. Hands are not necessary. +Hands were used only because if you are falling into unconsciousness, the hands will +become loose and the life process will resume again by itself. + +You can use plugs for the ears, a mask for the eyes, but do not use any plugs for the nose +or for the mouth, because then it can become fatal. At least the nose should remain open. +Close it with your hands. Then when you are actually falling into unconsciousness, the +hands will become loose and the breathing will come in. So there is a built-in security. +This method can be used by many. + +The fourth method is for those who have a very developed heart, who are loving, feeling + + + +types, emotional. BLESSED ONE, AS SENSES ARE ABSORBED IN THE HEART, +REACH THE CENTER OF THE LOTUS. This method can be used only by heart- +oriented persons. Therefore, understand first what is a heart-oriented person. Then this +method can be understood. + +With one who is heart-oriented, everything leads to the heart, everything. If you love +him, his heart will feel your love, not his head. A head-oriented person, even when loved, +feels it cerebrally, in the head. He thinks about it; he plans about it. Even his love is a +deliberate effort of the mind. + +A feeling type lives without reasoning. Of course, the heart has its own reasons, but it +lives without reasoning. + +If someone asks you, "Why do you love?" if you can answer why, then you are a head- +oriented person. And if you say, "I do not know, I just love," you are a heart-oriented +person. + +Even if you say that someone is beautiful and that is why you love, it is a reason. For a +heart-oriented person, someone is beautiful because they love him. The head-oriented +person loves someone because he is beautiful or she is beautiful. The reason comes first, +and then comes love. For the heart-oriented, love comes first and then everything else +follows. The feeling type is centered in the heart, so whatsoever happens touches his +heart. + +Just observe yourself. In your life, many things are happening every moment. Where do +they touch you? You are passing, and a beggar crosses the street. Where are you touched +by the beggar? Do you start thinking about economic conditions? Do you start thinking +about how begging should be stopped by law, or about how a socialist society should be +created so that there are no beggars? This is a head-oriented man. This beggar becomes +just a datum for him. His heart is not touched, only his head is touched. He is not going to +do something for this beggar here and now — no! He will do something for communism, +he will do something for the future, for some utopia. He may even devote his whole life, +but he cannot do anything just now. + +The mind is always doing in the future; the heart is always here and now. + +A heart-oriented person will do something now for this beggar. This beggar is an +individual, not a datum. But for a head-oriented man, this beggar is just a mathematical +figure. For him, how begging should be stopped is the problem, not that this beggar +should be helped — that is irrelevant. So just watch yourself. In many situations, watch +how you act. Are you concerned with the heart or are you concerned with the head? + +If you feel that you are a heart-oriented person, then this method will be very helpful to +you. But know well that everyone is trying to deceive himself that he is heart-oriented. +Everyone tries to feel that he is a very loving person, a feeling type — because love is +such a basic need that no one can feel at ease if he sees that he has no love, no loving +heart. So everyone goes on thinking and believing this, but belief will not do. Observe +very impartially, as if you are observing someone else, and then decide — because there is +no need to deceive yourself, and it will be of no help. Even if you deceive yourself, you +cannot deceive the technique, so when you do this technique you will feel that nothing is +happening. + +People come to me, and I ask them to what type they belong. They do not know really. +They have never thought about it — about what type they are. They have just vague +conceptions about themselves, and those conceptions are really just imagination. + + + +They have certain ideals and self-images, and they think — or rather, they wish — that +they are those images. They are not, and often it happens that they prove to be just the +contrary. + +There is a reason for it. A person who insists that he is a heart-oriented person may be +insisting only because he feels the absence of heart, and he is afraid. He cannot become +aware of the fact that he has no heart. + +Look at the world! If everyone is right about his heart, then this world cannot be so +heartless. This world is our total, so somewhere, something is wrong. Heart is not there. +Really, it was never trained to be there. Mind is trained, so it is there. There are schools, +colleges, universities to train the mind, but there is no place to train the heart. And the +training of the mind pays, but the training of the heart is dangerous. If your heart is +trained you will become absolutely unfit for this world, because the whole world is run +through reason. + +If your heart is trained, you will just be absurd in the context of the whole pattern. When +the whole world will be moving to the right, you will be moving to the left. Everywhere +you will feel difficulty. Really, the more man becomes civilized, the less and less the +heart is trained. We have really forgotten about it — that it exists, or that there is any need +for its training. That is why such methods, which can work very easily, never work. + + +Most of the religions are based on heart-oriented techniques — Christianity, Islam, +Hinduism and many others. They are based on the heart-oriented person. The older the +religion, the more it is based on heart-oriented persons. Really, when the Vedas were +written and Hinduism was developing, there were people who were heart-oriented. And +to find a mind-oriented person then was really difficult. But now the reverse is a problem. +You cannot pray, because prayer is a heart-oriented technique. That is why even in the +West, where Christianity — which is a religion of prayer — prevails, prayer has become +difficult. Particularly, the Catholic Church is prayer-oriented. + +There exists no such thing as meditation for Christianity, but now even in the West +people are becoming crazy about meditation. No one is going to church — and even if +someone is going, it is just a formal thing, just Sunday religion — because the heart- +oriented prayer has become absolutely unknown for man as he is in the West. + +Meditation is more mind-oriented, prayer is more heart-oriented. Or we can say that +prayer is a technique of meditation for heart-oriented persons. This technique is also for +heart- oriented persons: BLESSED ONE, AS SENSES ARE ABSORBED IN THE +HEART, REACH THE CENTER OF THE LOTUS. + +So what is to be done in this technique? AS SENSES ARE ABSORBED IN THE +HEART. + +.. Try! Many ways are possible. You touch someone: if you are a heart-oriented person +the touch immediately goes to your heart, and you can feel the quality. If you take the +hand of a person who is head-oriented, the hand will be cold — not just cold, but the very +quality will be cold. A deadness, a certain deadness will be in the hand. If the person is +heart-oriented then there is a certain warmth, then his hand will really melt with you. Y ou +will feel a certain thing flowing from his hand to you, and there will be a meeting, a +communication of warmth. + +This warmth comes from the heart. It can never come from the head, because the head is +always cool... cold, calculative. The heart is warm, non-calculative. The head always + + + +thinks about how to take more; the heart always feels how to give more. That warmth is +just a giving — a giving of energy, a giving of inner vibrations, a giving of life. That is +why you feel a different quality in it. If the person really embraces you, you will feel a +deep melting with him. + +Touch! Close your eyes; touch anything. Touch your beloved or your lover, touch your +child or your mother or your friend, or touch a tree or a flower, or just touch the earth. +Close your eyes and feel a communication from your heart to the earth, or to your +beloved. Feel that your hand is just your heart stretched out to touch the earth. Let the +feeling of touch be related to the heart. + + +You are listening to music. Do not listen to it from the head. Just forget your head and +feel that you are headless, there is no head at all. It is good to have a picture of yourself +without the head in your bedroom. Concentrate on it; you are without the head, do not +allow the head to come in. While listening to music, listen to it from the heart. Feel the +music coming to your heart; let your heart vibrate with it. Let your senses be joined to the +heart, not to the head. Try this with all the senses, and feel more and more that every +sense goes into the heart and dissolves into it. + +BLESSED ONE, AS SENSES ARE ABSORBED IN THE HEART, REACH THE +CENTER OF THE LOTUS. The heart is the lotus. Every sense is just the opening of the +lotus, the petals of the lotus. Try to relate your senses to the heart first. Secondly, always +think that every sense goes deep down into the heart and becomes absorbed in it. When +these two things become established, only then will your senses begin to help you. They +will lead you to the heart, and your heart will become a lotus. + +This lotus of the heart will give you a centering. Once you know the center of the heart, it +is very easy to fall down into the navel center, very easy. This sutra does not even +mention this — there is no need. If you are really absorbed in the heart totally, and reason +has stopped working, then you will fall down. + +From the heart, the door is opened toward the navel. Only from the head is it difficult to +go toward the navel. Or if you are between the two, between the heart and the head, then +too it is difficult to go to the navel. Once you are absorbed in the navel, you have +suddenly fallen beyond the heart. You have fallen into the navel center which is the basic +one — the original. + +That is why prayer helps. That is why Jesus could say, "Love is God." It is not exactly +right, but love is the door. If you are deeply in love — with anyone, it doesn’t matter +who... Love matters; the object of love doesn’t matter. If you are in deep love with +anyone, so much in love that there is no relationship from the head, if just the heart is +functioning, then this love will become prayer and your beloved or your lover will +become divine. + +Really, the eye of the heart cannot see anything else, and that is why it happens with +ordinary love also. If you fall in love with someone, that someone becomes divine. It may +not prove to be very lasting, and it may not prove to be a very deep thing, but in that +moment the lover or the beloved becomes divine. The head will destroy the whole thing +sooner or later, because the head will come in and try to manage everything. Even love +has to be managed. And once the head manages, everything is destroyed. + +If you can be in love without the head's management coming in, your love is bound to +become prayer and your beloved will become the door. + + + +Your love will make you centered in the heart — and once you are centered in the heart, +you automatically fall down deep into the navel center. + + +The fifth technique: + +UNMINDING MIND, KEEP IN THE MIDDLE - UNTIL. + +Only this much is the sutra. Just like any scientific sutra it is short, but even these few +words can transform your life totally. UNMINDING MIND, KEEP IN THE MIDDLE — +UNTIL. + +KEEP IN THE MIDDLE... Buddha developed his whole technique of meditation on this +sutra. His path is known as MAJJHIM NIKAYA — the middle path. Buddha says, +"Remain always in the middle — in everything." + +One Prince Shrown took initiation, Buddha initiated him into sannyas. That prince was a +rare man, and when he took sannyas, when he was initiated, his whole kingdom was just +amazed. The kingdom couldn’t believe it, the people couldn’t believe that Prince Shrown +could become a sannyasin. No one had ever even imagined it, as he was a man of this +world — indulging in everything, indulging to the extreme. Wine and women were his +whole milieu. + +Then suddenly Buddha came to the town, and the prince went to see him for a +DARSHAN — A spiritual encounter. He fell at Buddha's feet and he said, "Initiate me. I +will leave this world." Those who had come with him were not even aware... this was so +sudden. So they asked Buddha, "What is happening? This is a miracle. + +Shrown is not that type of man, and he has lived very luxuriously. Up to now we couldn’t +even imagine that Shrown is going to take sannyas, so what has happened? You have +done something." + +Buddha said, "I have not done anything. Mind can move easily from one extreme to the +other. That is the way of the mind — to move from one extreme to another. So Shrown is +not doing something new. It is to be expected. Because you do not know the law of the +mind, that is why you are so much taken aback." + +The mind moves from one extreme to another, that is the way of the mind. So it happens +every day: a person who was mad after wealth renounces everything, becomes a naked +fakir. We think, "What a miracle!" But it is nothing — just the ordinary law. A person +who was not mad after wealth cannot be expected to renounce, because only from one +extreme can you move to another — just like a pendulum, from one extreme to the other. +So a person who was after wealth, mad after wealth, will become mad against it, but the +madness will remain — that is the mind. A man who lived just for sex may become a +celibate, may move into isolation, but the madness will remain. Before he was living only +for sex, now he will be living only against sex — but the attitude, the approach, remains +the same. + +So a BRAHMACHARI, a celibate, is not really beyond sex; his whole mind is sex- +oriented. + +He is against, but not beyond. The way of beyond is always in the middle, it is never at +the extreme. So Buddha says, "This could have been expected. No miracle has happened. +This is how mind works." + +Shrown became a beggar, a sannyasin. He became a BHIKKHU, a monk, and soon other +disciples of Buddha observed that he was moving to the other extreme. Buddha never +asked anyone to be naked, but Shrown became naked. Buddha was not for nakedness. He + + + +said, "That is just another extreme." + +There are persons who live for clothes as if that is their life, and there are other persons +who become naked — but both believe in the same thing. Buddha never taught nakedness, +but Shrown became naked. He was the only disciple of Buddha who was naked. He +became very, very self-torturing. Buddha allowed one meal every day for the sannyasins, +but Shrown would take only one meal on alternate days. He became lean and thin. While +all the other disciples would sit for meditation under trees, in the shade, he would never +sit under any tree. He would always remain in the hot sun. He was a beautiful man and he +had a very lovely body, but within six months no one could recognize that he was the +same man. He became ugly, dark, black, burned. + +Buddha went to Shrown one night and asked him, "Shrown, I have heard that when you +were a prince, before initiation, you used to play on a VEENA, a sitar, and you were a +great musician. + +So I have come to ask you one question. If the strings of the veena are very loose, what +happens?" Shrown said, "If the strings are very loose, then no music is possible." And +then Buddha said, "And if the strings are very tight, too tight, then what happens?" +Shrown said, "Then too music cannot be produced. The strings must be in the middle — +neither loose nor tight, but just exactly in the middle." Shrown said, "It is easy to play the +veena, but only a master can set these strings right, in the middle." + +So Buddha said, "This much I have to say to you, after observing you for the last six +months — that in life also the music comes only when the strings are neither loose nor +tight, but just in the middle. So to renounce is easy, but only a master knows how to be in +the middle. So Shrown, be a master, and let these strings of life be just in the middle — in +everything. Do not go to this extreme, do not go to that one. Everything has two +extremes, but you remain just in the middle." + +But the mind is very unmindful. That is why the sutra says, UNMINDING MIND... You +will hear this, you will understand this, but the mind will not take note. The mind will +always go on choosing extremes. + +The extreme has a fascination for the mind. Why? Because in the middle, mind dies. + +Look at a pendulum: if you have any old clock, look at the pendulum. The pendulum can +go on moving the whole day if it goes to the extremes. + +When it goes to the left it is gathering momentum to go to the right. When it goes toward +the right, do not think that it is going toward the right — it is accumulating momentum to +go toward the left. So the extremes are right-left, right-left. + +Let the pendulum stay in the middle, then the whole momentum is lost. Then the +pendulum has no energy, because the energy comes from one of the extremes. Then that +extreme throws it toward another, then again, and it is a circle... the pendulum goes on +moving. Let it be in the middle, and the whole movement will then stop. + +Mind is just like a pendulum and every day, if you observe, you will come to know this. +You decide one thing on one extreme, and then you move to another. You are angry; then +you repent. You decide, "No, this is enough. Now I will never be angry." But you do not +see the extreme. + +"Never" is an extreme. How are you so certain that you will never be angry? What are +you saying? Think once more — never? Then go to the past and remember how many +times you have decided that "I will never be angry." When you say, "I will never be +angry," you do not know that by being angry you have accumulated momentum to go to + + + +the other extreme. + +Now you are feeling repentant, you are feeling bad. Your self-image is disturbed, shaken. +Now you cannot say you are a good man, you cannot say that you are a religious man. + +You have been angry, and how can a religious man be angry? How can a good man be +angry? So you repent to regain your goodness again. At least in your own eyes you can +feel at ease — that you have repented and you have decided that now there will be no +more anger. The shaken image has come back to the old status quo. Now you feel at ease, +you have moved to another extreme. + +But the mind that says, "Now I will never be angry," will again be angry. And when you +are again angry, you will forget completely your repentance, your decision — everything. +After anger, again the decision will come and the repentance will come, and you will +never feel the deception of it. This has been so always. + +Mind moves from anger to repentance, from repentance to anger. Remain in the middle. +Do not be angry and do not repent. If you have been angry, then please, at least do this: +do not repent. Do not move to the other extreme. Remain in the middle. Say, "I have been +angry and I am a bad man, a violent man. I have been angry. This is how I am." But do +not repent; do not move to the other extreme. Remain in the middle. If you can remain, +you will not gather the momentum, the energy to be angry again. + +So this sutra says, UNMINDING MIND, KEEP IN THE MIDDLE - UNTIL. And what +is meant by UNTIL? Until you explode! Keep in the middle until the mind dies. Keep in +the middle until there is no mind. + +So, UNMINDING MIND, KEEP IN THE MIDDLE - UNTIL there is no mind. If mind +is at the extremes, then the middle will be no-mind. + +But this is the most difficult thing in the world to do. It looks easy, it looks simple; it may +appear as if you can do this. And you will feel good if you think that there is no need for +any repentance. Try this, and then you will know that when you have been angry the +mind will insist on repenting. + +Husbands and wives continue to quarrel, and for centuries and centuries there have been +counsellors, advisors, great men who have been teaching how to live and love — but they +go on quarreling. Freud, for the first time, became aware of the phenomenon that +whenever you are in love — so-called love — you are also in hate. In the morning it is +love, in the evening it is hate, and the pendulum goes on moving. Every husband, every +wife knows this, but Freud has a very uncanny insight. Freud says that if a couple has +stopped fighting, know well that love has died. + +That love which existed with hate and fight cannot remain, so if you see a couple never +fighting, do not think that this is the ideal couple. It means no couple at all. They are +living parallel, but not with each other. They are parallel lines never meeting anywhere, +not even to fight. They are both alone together — parallel. + +Mind has to move to the opposite, so psychology now gives better advice. + +The advice is better, more deep, more penetrating. It says that if you really want to love — +with the mind — then do not be afraid to fight. Really, you must fight authentically so you +can move to the other extreme of authentic love. So when you are fighting with your +wife, do not avoid it; otherwise the love will also be avoided. When the time for fight is +there, fight until the end. Then by evening you will be able to love: the mind will have +gathered momentum. The ordinary love cannot exist without fight because there is a + + + +movement of the mind. Only a love which is not of the mind can exist without fight, but +then it is a different thing altogether. + +A Buddha loving... that is a different thing altogether. But if Buddha comes to love you, +you will not feel good because there will be no fault in it. It will be simply sweet and +sweet and sweet — and boring, because the spice comes from fight. A Buddha cannot be +angry, he can only love. You will not feel his love because you can feel only opposites; +you can feel it only in contrast. + +When Buddha came back to his home town after twelve years, his wife wouldn’t come to +receive him. The whole city gathered to receive him except his wife. Buddha laughed, +and he said to his chief disciple, Ananda, "Yashodhara has not come. I kn ow her well. It +seems she still loves me. She is proud, and she feels hurt. I was thinking that twelve years +is a long time and she might not be in love now, but it seems she is still in love — still +angry. + +She has not come to receive me. I will have to go to the house." + +So Buddha went. Ananda was with him; it was a condition with Ananda. When Ananda +took initiation he made a condition with Buddha, to which Buddha agreed, that he would +always remain with him. He was an elder cousin-brother, so Buddha had to concede. +Ananda followed him into the house, into the palace, so Buddha said, "At least for this +you remain behind and do not come with me, because she will be furious. I am coming +back after twelve years, and I just ran away without even telling her. She is still angry, so +do not come with me; otherwise she will feel that I have not even allowed her to say +anything. She must be feeling to say many things, so let her be angry, do not come with +me." + +Buddha went in. Of course, Yashodhara was just a volcano. She erupted, exploded. She +started crying and weeping and saying things. Buddha stayed there, waited there, and by +and by she cooled down and realized that Buddha had not even uttered a single word. She +wiped her eyes and looked at Buddha, and Buddha said, "I have come to say that I have +gained something, I have known something, I have realized something. If you become +cool I can give you the message — the truth that I have realized. I have waited so much in +order that you could go through a catharsis. Twelve years is a long affair. You must have +gathered many wounds, and your anger is understandable; I expected this. + +That shows that you are still in love with me. But there is a love beyond this love, and +only because of that love have I come back to tell you something." + +But Yashodhara could not feel that love. It is difficult to feel it because it is so silent. It is +so silent, it is as if absent. When mind ceases, then a different love happens. But that love +has no opposite to it. When mind ceases, really, whatsoever happens has no opposite to +it. With the mind there is always the polar opposite, and mind moves like a pendulum. +This sutra is wonderful, and miracles are possible through it: UNMINDING MIND, +KEEP IN THE MIDDLE - UNTIL. + +So try it. And this sutra is for your whole life. You cannot practice it sometimes, you +have to be aware continuously. Doing, walking, eating, in relationship, everywhere — +remain in the middle. Try at least, and you will feel a certain calmness developing, a +tranquility coming to you, a quiet center growing within you. + +Even if you are not successful in being exactly in the middle, try to be in the middle. By +and by you will have the feel of what middle means. Whatsoever may be the case — hate +or love, anger or repentance — always remember the polar opposites and remain in + + + +between. And sooner or later you will stumble upon the exact middle point. + +Once you know it you can never forget it again, because that middle point is beyond the +mind. + +That middle point is all that spirituality means. + +THE END. + + + +Chapter 12: Beyond mind to the source + + +There are many questions. The first question: + +Question 1 + +LAST NIGHT YOU SAID THAT WITH THE DAWN OF ENLIGHTENMENT, THE +SPACE BETWEEN THE TWO EYEBROWS, THE THIRD EYE, BECOMES ALL +INCLUSIVE. THE OTHER DAY YOU SAID THAT ALL ENLIGHTENED ONES +ARE CENTERED IN THEIR NAVEL, AND ON STILL ANOTHER DAY YOU HAVE +EXPLAINED ABOUT THE SILVER CORD IN THE MIDDLE OF THE SPINE. THUS, +WE KNOW ABOUT THREE BASIC THINGS AS THE ROOTS OF MAN. PLEASE +EXPLAIN THE RELATIVE SIGNIFICANCE AND RELATIVE FUNCTIONS OF +THESE THREE THINGS: THE NAVEL CENTER, THE THIRD EYE AND THE +SILVER CORD. + +The basic thing to be understood about these centers is this: whenever you are centered +within, the moment you are centered, whatsoever may be the center, you fall down to the +navel. If you are centered at the heart, the heart is irrelevant — centering is meaningful. + +Or if you are centered at the third eye, the third eye is not basic; the basic point is that +your consciousness is centered. So whatsoever may be the point of centering, once you +are centered — anywhere — you will fall down to the navel. + +The basic existential center is the navel, but your functional center may be anywhere. +From that center you will fall down automatically. There is no need to think about it. And +this is not so only with the heart center or the third eye center. If you are really centered +in reason, in the head, you will also fall down to the navel center. + + +Centering is the thing, but it is very difficult to be centered in reason, in the head. There +are problems. The heart center is based on love, faith, surrender. The head is based on +doubt and negation. + +To be totally negative is really impossible; to be totally in doubt is impossible. But it has +happened sometimes, because the impossible also happens. Sometimes, if your doubt +comes to such an intensity that nothing remains which is believed, not even the doubting +mind is believed, if the doubt turns upon itself and everything becomes doubt, then you +will fall down to the navel center immediately. But this is a very rare phenomenon. + +Trust is easier. You can trust totally more easily than you can doubt totally. You can say +yes totally more easily than you can say no. So even if you are centered at the head, the +CENTERING is what is basic: you will fall down to your existential roots. So be +centered anywhere. The spine will do; the heart will do; the head will do. Or you can also +find other centers in the body. + +Buddhists talk about nine CHAKRAS — nine dynamic centers in the body. Hindus talk +about seven CHAKRAS — seven dynamic centers in the body. Tibetans talk about +thirteen centers in the body. You can find your own also, there is no need to study about +these. + +Any point in the body can be made an object of centering. For example, tantra uses the +sex center for centering. + +Tantra works with bringing your consciousness to it totally. The sex center will do. +Taoists have used the big toe as the center. Move your consciousness down to the big toe; + + + +remain there, forget the whole body. Let your whole consciousness go to the toe. That +will do, because really, on what you are centering is irrelevant. You are centering — that +is what is basic. The thing happens because of centering, not because of the center — +remember this. The center is not significant, CENTERING is significant. + +So do not be puzzled, because in so many methods, in one hundred and twelve methods, +many centers will be used. Do not become puzzled over which center is more important +or which is real, any center will do. You can choose according to your own liking. + +If your mind is very sexual, it is good to choose the sex center. Use it, because your +consciousness is naturally flowing toward it — then it is better to choose it. But it has +become difficult to choose the sex center. That is one of the most natural centers; your +consciousness is attracted toward it biologically. Why not use this biological force +toward inner transfonnation? Make it the point of your centering. + +But social conditioning, sexually repressive teachings, moralizing, they have done a deep +hann. You are disjoined from your sex center. Really, our image of our real selves +excludes the sex center. + +Imagine your body: you will leave your sex organs out of it; that is why many people feel +as if their sex organs are something different from them, that they are not part of them. +This is why there is so much hiding, so much becoming unconscious. + +If someone should come from space, from some other planet, and he should see you, he +will not be able to conceive that you have any sex center. If he should listen to your talk, +he will not be able to understand that there exists anything like sex. If he moves in your +society, in the formal world, he will not know that anything like sex is happening. + +We have created a division. A barrier is there, and we have cut off the sex center from +ourselves. Really, because of sex we have divided the body into two. The upper means +"higher" in our minds and the lower means "lower" — it is condemned. So "lower" is not +just some information about the location of the bottom half, it is an evaluation also. You +yourself do not think that the lower body is you. + +If someone asks you, "Where are you in your body?" you will point to your head, +because that is the highest. That is why brahmins in India will say, "We are the head and +the sudras, the untouchables, they are the feet." The feet are lower than the head. Really, +you are the head, and the feet and the other parts only belong to you, they are not you. To +make this division we have made clothes in two parts — some for the upper body and +some for the lower body. + +This is only to divide the body in two. There is a subtle division. + +The lower body is not part of you. It hangs on you — that is another thing. That is why it +is difficult to use the sex center for centering. But if you can use it, that is the best, +because biologically your energy is flowing toward that center. Concentrate on it. +Whenever you feel any sexual urge, close your eyes and feel your energy flowing toward +the sex center. + +Make it a meditation; feel yourself centered in the sex center. Then suddenly you will +feel a change of quality in the energy. Sexuality will disappear, and the sex center will +become illumined, full of energy, dynamic. You will feel life at its peak at this center. +And if you are centered, sex will really be forgotten completely at that moment. From the +sex center you will feel energy flowing all over the body, even transcending the body and +going into the cosmos. If you are totally centered at the sex center, suddenly you will be +thrown to your basic root, at the navel. + + + +Tantra has used the sex center, and I think tantra has been one of the most scientific +approaches toward human transformation, because to use sex is very scientific. When the +mind is already flowing toward it, why not use this natural flow as a vehicle? + +That is the basic difference between tantra and so-called moralist teachings. Moralist +teachers can never use the sex center for transformation — they are afraid. + +And one who is afraid of sex energy will really find it very, very difficult to transform +himself or herself because he is fighting against the current, unnecessarily flowing +against the river. + +It is easy to flow with the river, just float. And if you can float without any conflict, you +can use this center for centering. + +Any center will do. You can create your own centers... no need to be traditional. All +centers are devices — devices for centering. When you are centered you will come down +to your navel automatically. A centered consciousness goes back to the original source. +The second question: + +Question 2 + +BUDDHA INSPIRED A LARGE NUMBER OF PERSONS TO BECOME +SANNYASINS - SANNYASINS WHO WOULD BEG FOR THEIR MEALS AND +LIVE AWAY FROM SOCIETY, BUSINESS AND POLITICS. BUDDHA HIMSELF +LIVED AN ASCETIC LIFE. THIS MONASTIC LIFE SEEMS TO BE THE OTHER +EXTREME OF THE WORLDLY LIFE. THIS DOESN’T SEEM TO BE THE MIDDLE +PATH. CAN YOU EXPLAIN THIS? + +It will be difficult to understand because you are not aware of what is the other end of +worldly life. The other end of life is always death. There have been teachers who said +that suicide is the only path. And not only in the past; even now, in the present, there are +thinkers who say that life is absurd. If life as such is meaningless, then death becomes +meaningful. Life and death are polar opposites, so the opposite to life is death. + +Try to understand it. And it will be helpful for you to find out the way for yourself. + +If death is the polar opposite of life, then mind can move to death very easily — and it +happens. When someone commits suicide, have you ever observed that the person who +commits suicide was attached too much to life? Only those who are too much attached to +life can commit suicide. + +For example, you are too attached to your husband or to your wife and you think you +cannot live without him or her. Then the husband or the wife dies, and you commit +suicide. The mind has moved to the other end because it was too attached to life. When +life frustrates, the mind can move to the other end. + +Suicides are of two types — wholesale suicide and gradual suicide. You can commit +gradual suicide by withdrawing yourself from life, cutting yourself off, cutting your +moorings in life by and by, dying slowly, gradually. + +In Buddha’s time there were schools which preached suicide. These were the real +opposites to life, to worldly life. There were schools which were teaching that to commit +suicide is the only way out of this nonsense which we call life, the only way out of this +suffering. "If you are alive you will have to suffer," they said, "and there is no way of +going beyond misery while you are alive. So commit suicide, destroy yourself." When +you hear this it looks like too extremist a view, but try to understand it deeply. + + +It carries some meaning. + + + +Sigmund Freud, after forty years of constant work with the human mind, one of the +longest researches one individual can do, came to conclude that man as he is cannot be +happy. The very way mind functions creates misery, so at the most less misery or more +misery can be the choice. No misery cannot be the choice. If you adjust your mind you +will be less miserable, that is all. It looks very hopeless. + +The existentialists — Sartre, Camus and others — say that life can never be blissful. The +very nature of life is dread, anguish, suffering, so the most one can do is to face it +bravely, with no hope. You can only face it bravely, and that is all — with no hope. The +situation as such is hopeless. Camus asks, "Well, if this is the situation, then why not +commit suicide? If there is no way to go beyond in life, then why not leave this life?" + +One of Dostoevsky's characters in one of the greatest novels of the world, THE +BROTHERS KARAMAZOV, says, "I am trying to find out where your God is just to +return to him the entrance ticket — the entrance ticket to life. I don’t want to be here. And +if there is any God, he must be very violent and cruel," the character says, "because +without asking me he has thrown me into life. It has never been my choice. Why am I +alive without my choosing it?" + +There were many schools in Buddha's time. + +Buddha’s time was one of the most intellectually dynamic periods in human history. For +example, there was Ajit Kesh Kambal. You may not have heard the name because it is +difficult to create a following around those who preach suicide. So no sect exists around +Ajit Kesh Kambal, but he said continuously for five years that suicide alone is the only +way. + +It is reported that someone asked Ajit, "Then why have you not committed suicide up to +now?" He said, "Just to preach, I have to suffer life. I have a message to give to the +world. If I commit suicide, then who will preach? Who will teach this message? Just to +give this message, I am here. Otherwise, life is not worth living." It is the opposite +extreme of life, of this so-called life which we live. + +Buddha's was the middle path. Buddha said, neither death nor life. That is what sannyas +means: neither attachment to life nor repulsion, but just being in the middle. So Buddha +says that sannyas is to be just in the middle. Sannyas is not negation of life. Rather, +sannyas is the negation of both life and death. When you are concerned with neither life +nor death, then you become a sannyasin. + +If you can see the polar opposites of life and death, then Buddha's initiation into sannyas +is just an initiation in the middle path. So a sannyasin is not really against life. If he is, +then he is not a sannyasin. Then really, he is a neurotic; he has gone to the other extreme. + +A sannyasin has a very balanced consciousness — balanced just in the middle. + +"If life is misery," the mind says, "then move to the other end." But to Buddhists life is +misery because you are at the extreme. That is the Buddhist idea: life is a misery because +it is at one extreme, and death will also be a misery because it is another extreme. Bliss is +just in the middle; bliss is balance. + +A sannyasin is a balanced being — neither leaning to the right nor to the left, neither a +leftist nor a rightist: just in the middle — silent, unmoving, not choosing this nor that, in a +non-choice, remaining in the center. + +So do not choose death. CHOICE is misery. If you choose death you have chosen misery, +if you choose life you have chosen misery, because life and death are two extremes. And +remember, they are two extremes of one thing. They are not really two, only one thing + + + +which has two poles: life and death. + +If you choose one, you will have to go against the other pole. That creates misery, +because death is implied in life. You cannot choose life without choosing death. How can +you? The moment you choose life, you have chosen death. That creates misery because +as a result of your having chosen life, death will be there. You have chosen happiness: +simultaneously, without your knowing, you have chosen unhappiness, because that is part +of it. + +If you have chosen love, then you have chosen hate. + +The other is intrinsic in it; it is hidden there. And one who chooses love will suffer, +because then he will hate — and when he comes to hate he will suffer. + +Do not choose, be in the middle. In the middle is the truth. At one end is death, at the +other end is life. But this energy moving between these two, in the middle, is the truth. + +Do not choose, because choice means choice of one thing against another thing. To be in +the middle means being choiceless. Then you will leave the whole thing. And when you +have not chosen, you cannot be made miserable. + +Man is made miserable through choice. Do not choose. Just be! It is arduous, it appears +impossible — but try it. Whenever you have two opposites, try to be in the middle. By and +by you will know the hunch, the feel, and once you know the feel of how to be in the +middle — and it is a delicate thing, very delicate, the most delicate thing in life — once +you have the feel nothing can disturb you, nothing can make you suffer. Then you exist +without suffering. + +That is what sannyas means: to exist without suffering. But to exist without suffering you +have to exist without choice, so be in the middle. And Buddha has tried for the first time, +so consciously, to create a path of being always in the middle. + +The third question: + +Question 3 + +ENLIGHTEN US ABOUT A FEW PRACTICAL POINTS FOR THE OPENING AND +DEVELOPMENT OF THE HEART CENTER. + + +The first point: try to be headless. Visualize yourself as headless; move headlessly. It +sounds absurd, but it is one of the most important exercises. Try it, and then you will +know. Walk, and feel as if you have no head. In the beginning it will be only "as if." It +will be very weird. When the feeling will come to you that you have no head, it will be +very weird and strange. But by and by you will settle down at the heart. + +There is one law... You may have seen that someone who is blind has more keen ears, +more musical ears. Blind men are more musical; their feeling for music is deeper. Why? +The energy that ordinarily moves through the eyes now cannot move through them, so it +chooses a different path. It moves through the ears. + +Blind men have a deeper sensitivity of touch. If a blind man touches you, you will feel +the difference, because we ordinarily do much work with touch through our eyes; we are +touching each other through our eyes. A blind man cannot touch through the eyes, so the +energy moves through his hands. A blind man is more sensitive than anyone who has +eyes. Sometimes it may not be so, but generally it is so. Energy starts moving from +another center if one center is not there. + +So try this exercise I am talking about — the exercise in headlessness — and suddenly you +will feel a strange thing: it will be as if for the first time you are at the heart. + + + +Walk headlessly. Sit down to meditate, close your eyes, and simply feel that there is no +head. Feel, "My head has disappeared." In the beginning it will be just "as if," but by and +by you will feel that the head has really disappeared. And when you feel that your head +has disappeared, your center will fall down to the heart — immediately. You will be +looking at the world through the heart and not through the head. + +When for the first time Westerners reached Japan, they couldn’t believe that Japanese had +traditionally believed for centuries that they think through the belly. If you ask a Japanese +child — if he is not educated in Western ways — "Where is your thinking?" he will point +to his belly. + +Centuries and centuries have passed, and Japan has been living without the head. It is just +a concept. If I ask you, "Where is your thinking going on?" you will point toward the +head, but a Japanese will point to the belly, not to the head. And one of the reasons why +the Japanese mind is more calm, quiet and collected, is this. + +Now this concept has been disturbed because the West has spread over everything. Now +there exists no East. Only in some individuals here and there, who are like islands, does +the East exist. Otherwise the East has disappeared; now the whole world is Western. + +Try headlessness. Meditate standing before your mirror in the bathroom. + +Look deep into your eyes and feel that you are looking from the heart. By and by the +heart center will begin to function. And when the heart functions, it changes your total +personality, the total structure, the whole pattern, because the heart has its own way. + +So the first thing: try headlessness. Secondly, be more loving, because love cannot +function through the head. Be more loving! That is why when someone is in love, he +loses his head. People say that he has gone mad. If you are not mad and in love, then you +are not in love really. The head must be lost. If the head is there, unaffected, functioning +ordinarily, then love is not possible, because for love you need the heart to function — not +the head. It is a function of the heart. + +It happens that when a very rational person falls in love, he becomes stupid. He himself +feels what stupidity he is doing, what silliness. What is he doing? Then he makes two +parts of his life. He creates a division. The heart becomes a silent, intimate affair. When +he moves out of his house, he moves out of his heart. He lives in the world with the head, +and only comes down to the heart when he is loving. But it is very difficult, and +ordinarily it never happens. + +I was staying in Calcutta at a friend's house, and the friend was a justice of the High +Court. His wife told me, "I have only one problem to tell you. Can you help me?" + +So I said, "What is the problem?" + +She said, "My husband is your friend. + +He loves you and respects you, so if you say something to him it may be helpful." + +So I asked her, "What is to be said? Tell me." She said, "He remains a High Court judge +even in the bed. I have not known a lover, a friend or a husband. He is a High Court +judge twenty-four hours a day." + +It is difficult, it is difficult to come down from your pedestal. It becomes a fixed attitude. +If you are a businessman, you will remain a businessman in the bed also. It is difficult to +accommodate two persons within, and it is not easy to change your pattern completely, +immediately, anytime you like. It is difficult, but if you are in love you will have to come +down from the head. + +So for this meditation try to be more and more loving. And when I say be more loving, I + + + +mean change the quality of your relationship: let it be based on love. Not only with your +wife or with your child or with your friend, but toward life as such become more loving. +That is why Mahavir and Buddha have talked about nonviolence. It was just to create a +loving attitude toward life. + +When Mahavir moves, walks, he remains aware not even to kill an ant. Why? Really, the +ant is not his concern. He is coming down from the head to the heart. He is creating a +loving attitude toward life as such. The more your relationships are based on love — all +relationships — the more your heart center will function. + +It will start working; you will look at the world through different eyes, because the heart +has its own way of looking at the world. The mind can never look in that way — that is +impossible for the mind. The mind can only analyze! The heart synthesizes; the mind can +only dissect, divide — it is a divider. Only the heart gives unity. + +When you can look through the heart, the whole universe looks like one unity. When you +approach through the mind, the whole world becomes atomic. There is no unity, only +atoms and atoms and atoms. The heart gives a unitary experience, it joins together, and +the ultimate synthesis is God. If you can look through the heart, the whole universe looks +like one. That oneness is God. + +That is why science can never find God. That is impossible, because the method applied +can never reach to the ultimate unity. The very method of science is reason, analysis, +division. So science comes to molecules, atoms, electrons... They will go on dividing, but +they can never come to the organic unity of the whole. The whole is impossible to look at +through the head. + +So be more loving. Remember, whatsoever you are doing, the quality of love must be +there. This has to be a constant remembering. You are walking on the grass — feel that +the grass is alive. Every blade is as much alive as you are. + +Mahatma Gandhi was staying with Rabindranath Tagore in Shanti Niketan. + +And look at their different approaches! Gandhi’s nonviolence was a mind affair. He was +always reasoning about it, rational about it. He thought about it, he struggled over it, he +pondered, contemplated, and then he concluded; he experimented, then he concluded. If +you have read his autobiography, you will recall that he has named the book, +EXPERIMENTS WITH TRUTH. The very word EXPERIMENTS is scientific, of reason +— a lab word. + +He was staying with Rabindranath the poet, and they both went for a walk in the gardens. +The land was green, alive, so Gandhi said to Rabindranath, "Come out to the lawn." +Rabindranath said, "That is impossible. I cannot walk over the lawn. Every blade is as +much alive as I am. I cannot step over so alive a phenomenon." + +And Rabindranath was not a preacher of nonviolence — not at all. He never talked about +nonviolence, but his approach was through the heart. He feels the grass. Gandhi pondered +over what he said, and then answered, "You are right." This is a mind approach. + +Be loving. Even with things, be loving. If you are sitting on a chair, be loving. Feel the +chair; have a feeling of gratitude. The chair is giving comfort to you. Feel the touch, love +it, have a loving feeling. The chair itself is not important. If you are eating, eat lovingly. +Indians say that food is divine. The meaning is that when you are eating, the food is +giving you life, energy, vitality. + + +Be grateful, be loving to it. + + + +Ordinarily we eat food very violently, as if we are killing something, not as if we are +absorbing — as if we are killing. Or very indifferently you go on throwing things into +your belly, without any feeling. Touch your food lovingly, with gratitude: it is your life. +Take it in, taste it, enjoy it. Do not be indifferent and do not be violent. + +Our teeth are very violent because of our animal heritage. Animals have no other +weapons; nails and teeth are their only weapons of violence. Your teeth are basically a +weapon, so people go on killing with their teeth — they kill their food. That is why, the +more violent you are, the more you will need food. + +But there is a limit to food, so one goes on smoking or one goes on chewing gum. That is +violence. You enjoy it because you are killing something with your teeth, grinding +something with your teeth, so one goes on chewing gum or pan. This is a part of +violence. Do whatsoever you are doing, but do it lovingly. Do not be indifferent. Then +your heart center will start functioning, and you will come down deep into the heart. + +First: try headlessness. Secondly: try love. Thirdly: be more and more aesthetic — +sensitive toward beauty, toward music, toward all that touches the heart. If this world can +be trained more for music and less for mathematics, we will have a better humanity; if we +can train the mind more for poetry and less for philosophy, we will have a better +humanity. + +Because while you are listening to music or playing music the mind is not needed, you +drop from the mind. + +Be more aesthetic, more poetic, more sensitive. You may not be a great musician or a +great poet or a great painter, but you can enjoy, and you can create something in your +own right. There is no need to be a Picasso. You can paint your house yourself; you can +paint some pictures. + +No need to be a maestro, an Alauddin Khan. You can play something in your house; you +can play on a flute, no matter how amateurish. But do something which is concerned with +the heart. Sing, dance, do something which is concerned with the heart. Be more sensitive +to the world of the heart — and not much is needed to be sensitive. + +Even a poor man can be sensitive; riches are not needed. You may not have a palace +where you can be sensitive. If you are just lying on the beach, it is enough to be sensitive. +You can be sensitive to the sand, you can be sensitive to the sun, you can be sensitive to +the waves, to the wind, to the trees, to the sky. The whole world is there for you to be +sensitive to it. Try to be more sensitive, alive — and ACTIVELY sensitive, because the +whole world has become passive. + +You go to a cinema hall: someone else is doing something and you just sit there and +watch. Someone else is loving on the screen and you are watching. You are just a voyeur +— passive, dead, not doing anything. + +You are not a participant. Unless you are a participant, your heart center will not +function. So it is better sometimes to dance. + +You are not going to be a great dancer — there is no need. Howsoever awkward, just +dance. That will give you the feeling of the heart. While you are dancing your center will +be the heart; it can never be at the mind. Jump, play like children. Sometimes forget +completely your name, your prestige, your degree. Forget them completely; be childlike. +Do not be serious. Sometimes take life as a fun, and the heart will develop. The heart +gathers energy. + +And when you have a heart that is alive, the quality of your mind will also change. Then + + + +you can go to the mind, you can function through the mind, but the mind will become just +an instrument — you can use it. Then you are not obsessed with it, and you can move +away from it any moment you like. Then you are a master. The heart will give you a +feeling that you are a master. + +And another thing: you will come to know that you are neither the head nor the heart, +because you can move from heart to head, from head to heart. Then you know that you +are something else — X. If you remain in the head and never move anywhere, you +become identified with the head. You do not know that you are different. This movement +from heart to head and from head to heart will give you the feeling that you are totally +different. + +Sometimes you are at the heart and sometimes you are at the head, but you are neither +heart nor head. + +This third point of awareness will lead you to the third center — to the navel. And the +navel is not really a center. There, YOU ARE! That is why it cannot be developed, it can +only be discovered. + +The fourth question: + +Question 4 + +YOU SAID THAT WESTERN PSYCHOLOGISTS NOW SAY IT IS BETTER NOT TO +AVOID FIGHTING IN A LOVE RELATIONSHIP, AND THAT FACING IT WHEN IT +COMES MAKES THE LOVE MORE INTENSE. THEN YOU SPOKE OF BUDDHA’S +MIDDLE PATH WHICH EXCLUDES BOTH EXTREMES. FOR THOSE WHO HAVE +NOT YET TRANSCENDED INTO THE LOVE THAT IS BEYOND THE TWO +POLES, WHICH WAY IS PREFERABLE FOR LOVERS IN YOUR OPINION? + +Some basic points. Firstly, the love of the mind is bound to be a movement between two +polar opposites of hate and love. With mind, duality is bound to be there. So if you are +loving to someone with your mind, you cannot escape the other pole. You can hide it, +you can suppress it, you can forget about it — the so-called cultured are always doing +that. But then they become numb, dead. + +If you cannot fight with your lover, if you cannot be angry, then the authenticity of the +love is lost. If you suppress your anger, that suppressed anger will become a part of you, +and that suppressed anger will not allow you total let-go while in love. It is always there. + +You are withholding it; you have suppressed it. + +If I am angry and I have suppressed it, then when I am loving the suppressed anger is +there, and that will make my love dead. If I have not been authentic in my anger, I cannot +be authentic in my love. If you are authentic, then you are authentic in both. If you are +not authentic in one, you cannot be authentic in the other. + +All over the world so-called teachings, civilization, culture, they have deadened love +completely — and in the name of love this has happened. They say, "If you love someone, +then do not be angry — your love is false if you are angry. Then do not fight, then do not +hate." + +Of course, it looks logical. If you are in love, how can you hate? So we cut off the hate +part. But with the hate part cut off, the love becomes impotent. It is as if you have cut off +one leg of a man and then you say, "Now you move! Now you can run, you are free to +run." But you have cut off a leg, so the man cannot move. + +Hate and love are two poles of one phenomenon. If you cut hate, love will be dead and +impotent. That is why every family has become impotent. And then you become afraid of + + + +letting go. When you are in love you cannot let go completely because you are afraid. If +you let go completely the anger, the violence, the hate that is hidden and suppressed may +come out. Then you have to force it down continuously. + +Deep down you have to fight it continuously. And in fighting it you cannot be natural and +spontaneous. Then you just pose that you are loving. You pretend, and everyone knows: +your wife knows that you are pretending, and you know that your wife is pretending. +Everyone is pretending. Then the whole life becomes false. + +Two things have to be done in order to go beyond mind. First, go into meditation, and +then touch the level of no-mind within you. Then you will have a love that will not have +any polar opposite. But then in that love there will be no excitement, no passion. That +love will be silent — a deep peace with not even a ripple on it. + +A Buddha, a Jesus, they also love. But in that love there is no excitement, no fever. The +fever comes from the polar opposite; the excitement comes from the polar opposite. Two +polar opposites create tension. But Buddha's love, Jesus' love, is a silent phenomenon, so +only those who have reached to the state of no-mind can understand their love. + +Jesus was passing, and it was hot, at noon. He was tired, so he just rested under a tree. He +didn't know to whom the tree belonged. It belonged to Mary Magdalene. Mary was a +prostitute. + +She looked from her window and saw this very beautiful man — one of the most beautiful +ever born. She felt attracted, and not only attracted, she felt passion. She came out and +she asked Jesus, "Come into my house. + +Why are you resting here? You are welcome." Jesus saw in her eyes passion, love — so- +called love. Jesus said, "Next time, when I am again tired while passing here, I will come +to your house. But just now the need is fulfilled. I am ready to move again, so thank +you." + +Mary felt insulted. This was rare... really, she had never invited anyone before. People +would come from far away just to have a look at her. Even kings would come to her, and +here was this beggar refusing her. Jesus was just a beggar, a vagabond — just a hippie, +and he refused her. So Mary said to Jesus, "Can't you feel my love? This is a love +invitation. So come! Do not reject me. Don’t you have any love in your heart?" + +Jesus said to her in reply, "I also love you — and really, all those who come pretending +that they love you, they do not love you." He said, "Only I can love you." + +And he was right. But that love has a different quality. That love does not have the polar +opposite, the contrast. Thus the tension is missing, the excitement is missing. He is not +excited about love, not feverish. And love is not a relationship for him, it is a state of +being. + +Go beyond mind; reach to a level of no-mind. Then love flowers, but that love has no +opposite to it. Beyond mind there is no opposite to anything. Beyond mind everything is +one. Within mind, everything is divided into two. But if you are within mind, it is better +to be authentic than to be false. + + +So be authentic when you feel angry toward your lover or your beloved. Be authentic +while you are in anger, and then with no repression, when the moment of love will come, +when the mind will move to the other extreme, you will have a spontaneous flow. So +with mind, take fighting as part of it. It is the very dynamism of the mind to work in polar + + + +opposites. So be authentic in your anger, be authentic in your fight; then you will be +authentic in your love also. + +So for lovers, I would like to say: be authentic. And if you are really authentic, a unique +phenomenon will happen. You will become weary of the whole nonsense of moving in +polar opposites. But be authentic; otherwise you will never become weary. + +A repressed mind never becomes really aware that he is gripped in polar opposites. He is +never really angry, he is never really in love, so he has no real experience of the mind. +Thus, I suggest to be authentic. Do not be false. BE REAL! And authenticity has its own +beauty. Your lover, your beloved will understand when you are really angry — +authentically angry. Only a fake anger or a false non-anger cannot be forgiven. Only a +false face cannot be forgiven. Be authentic, and then you will be authentic in love also. +That authentic love will compensate, and through this authentic living you will become +wearied. You will come to wonder what you are doing — why you are just a pendulum +moving from one pole to another. + +You will be bored, and then only can you decide to move beyond mind and beyond +polarity. + +Be an authentic man or be an authentic woman. Do not allow any falsity; do not pretend. +Be real and suffer reality. Suffering is good. Suffering is really a training, a discipline. +Suffer it! Suffer anger and suffer love and suffer hate. Remember only one thing: never +be false. If you do not feel love, then say that you do not feel love. Do not pretend; do not +try to show that you are loving. If you are angry, then say that you are angry and be +angry. + +There will be much suffering, but suffer it. Through that suffering a new consciousness is +bom. You become aware of the whole nonsense of hate and love. You hate the person +and you also love the same person, and you go on moving in a circle. That circle will +become crystal clear for you, and it becomes crystal clear only through suffering. + +Do not escape suffering. You need a REAL suffering. It is like a fire: it will bum you. All +that is false will bum and all that is real will be there. This is what existentialists call +authenticity. Be authentic, and then you cannot be anymore in the mind. Be non- +authentic, and you will be for lives and lives in the mind. + +You will get bored of the duality. But how can one get bored of the duality unless one is +really in the duality, not pretending? Then you will know that the so-called love of the +mind is nothing but a disease. + + +Have you observed that a lover cannot sleep? He is not at ease — he is feverish. If you +examine him, he will show many symptoms of many diseases. This love, the so-called +love of mind and body, is really a disease, but one remains occupied — that is the +function of it. Otherwise you will feel unoccupied, as if you are not doing anything in this +world. Your whole life will seem vacant, so love is good to fill it. + +Mind itself is the disease, so whatsoever belongs to the mind is going to be a disease. +Only beyond mind, where you are not divided in duality, where you are one, only there +does a different love flower. Jesus calls it love. Buddha calls it compassion. This is just to +make a distinction. It makes no difference what you call it. + +There is a possibility of a love which has no opposite to it, but that love can come only +when you go beyond this love. And to go beyond, I suggest that you be authentic. To be +authentic — in hate, in love, in anger. In everything, be authentic, real, not pretending, + + + +because only a reality can be transcended. You cannot transcend unreal things. +THE END. + + + +Chapter 13: Entering the inner centering + + +18. LOOK LOVINGLY AT SOME OBJECT. DO NOT GO TO ANOTHER OBJECT. +HERE IN THE MIDDLE OF THE OBJECT - THE BLESSING. + +19. WITHOUT SUPPORT FOR FEET OR HANDS, SIT ONLY ON THE BUTTOCKS. +SUDDENLY, THE CENTERING. + +20. IN A MOVING VEHICLE, BY RHYTHMICALLY SWAYING, EXPERIENCE. OR +IN A STILL VEHICLE, BY LETTING YOURSELF SWING IN SLOWING +INVISIBLE CIRCLES. + +21. PIERCE SOME PART OF YOUR NECTAR-FILLED FORM WITH A PIN, AND +GENTLY ENTER THE PIERCING AND ATTAIN TO THE INNER PURITY. + +The human body is a mysterious mechanism. Its working is two-dimensional. In order to +go to the outside, your consciousness goes through the senses to meet the world, to meet +matter. But this is only one dimension of your body's functions. Your body has another +dimension also: it leads you in. If consciousness goes out, then whatsoever you know is +matter; if consciousness goes in, then whatsoever you know is non-matter. + +In reality, there is no division: matter and non-matter are one. But this reality — X — if +looked at through the eyes, the senses, appears as matter. This same reality, the X, looked +at from within — not through the senses, but through centering — looks like non-matter. +The reality is one, but you can look at it in two ways. One is through the senses; another +is not through the senses. All these techniques of centering are really to lead you to a +point in yourself where senses are not working, where you go beyond senses. + + +Three things have to be understood first before we enter the techniques. Firstly, when you +see through the eyes, the eyes are not seeing: they are only openings to see. The seer is +behind the eyes. That which looks through the eyes is not the eyes. That is why you can +close your eyes and still see dreams, visions, images. The seer is behind the senses; he +moves through the senses to the world. But if you close your senses, the seer remains +within. + +If the seer, this consciousness, is centered, suddenly he becomes aware of himself. And +when you are aware of yourself you are aware of the total existence, because you and +existence are not two. But to become aware of oneself one needs centering. By centering +I mean your consciousness not being divided in many directions, your consciousness not +moving anywhere, remaining in itself... non-moving, rooted, without any direction, just +remaining there: in. + +It looks difficult to remain in, because for our minds even this thinking of how to remain +in becomes a going out. We start thinking: the "how" starts thinking. To think about the +in, the inner, is also a thought for us — and every thought as such belongs to the outer, +never to the inner, because in the innermost center you are simply consciousness. +Thoughts are like clouds. They have come to you, but they do not belong to you. Every +thought comes from the outside, from without. + +You cannot produce a single thought inside, within. Every thought comes from the +outside; there is no possibility of creating a thought within. Thoughts are like clouds +coming to you. So whenever you are thinking, you are not in — remember. To be thinking + + + +is to be out. So even if you are thinking about the inner, the soul, the self, you are not in. +All these thoughts about the self, about the inner, about the within, have come from +without; they do not belong to you. To you belongs only simple consciousness, sky-like, +without the clouds. + +So what to do? How to gain this simple consciousness inside? Some devices are used, +because directly you cannot do anything. Some devices are needed through which you +are thrown in, thrown to it. This center always needs an indirect approach; you cannot +approach it directly. Understand this clearly, because this is very basic. + +You are playing, and later on you report that it was very blissful, that "I was feeling very +happy, I enjoyed it. A subtle happiness has been left behind." Someone listens to you. He +is also after happiness — everyone is. He says, "Then I must play, because if through +playing happiness is achieved, then I must achieve." He plays also, but he is directly +concerned with happiness, with bliss, with enjoyment. Happiness is a by-product. If you +are totally in your play, absorbed, happiness results, but if you are constantly hankering +for happiness nothing happens. + +The play is the start. + +You are listening to music. Someone says, "I feel very blissful." But if constantly you are +directly concerned with bliss, you will not even be able to listen. That concern, that greed +for bliss will become a barrier. Bliss is a by-product, you cannot grab it directly. It is so +delicate a phenomenon that you have to approach it only indirectly. Do something else +and it happens. You cannot do it directly. + +Whatsoever is beautiful, whatsoever is eternal is so delicate that if you try to grab it +directly it is destroyed. That is what is meant by techniques and devices. These +techniques go on telling you to do something. That which you are doing is not +significant; that which results is significant. But your mind must be concerned with +doing, with technique, not with the result. The result happens — it is bound to happen. + +But it always happens indirectly, so do not be concerned with the result. Be concerned +with the technique. Do it as totally as possible, and forget the result. It happens, but you +can become a barrier to it. + +If you are concerned only with the result, then it will never happen. And then it becomes +very strange. People come to me and say, "You said that if we do meditation this will +happen, but we are doing it and this is not happening." And they are right, but they have +forgotten the condition: you have to forget about the result, only then does it happen. + + +You have to be in the act totally. The more you are in the act, the sooner the result +happens. But it is always indirect. You cannot be aggressive about it; you cannot be +violent about it. It is such a delicate phenomenon; it cannot be attacked. It only comes to +you while you are engaged somewhere else so totally that your inner space is vacant. +These techniques are all indirect. There is no direct technique for spiritual happening. + +Now the technique — the sixth technique for centering: + +LOOK LOVINGLY ON SOME OBJECT. DO NOT GO ON TO ANOTHER OBJECT. +HERE IN THE MIDDLE OF THE OBJECT - THE BLESSING. + +I should repeat it: LOOK LOVINGLY ON SOME OBJECT. DO NOT GO ON TO +ANOTHER. Do not move to another object. HERE IN THE MIDDLE OF THIS +OBJECT - THE BLESSING. + + + +LOOK LOVINGLY ON SOME OBJECT... LOVINGLY is the key. Have you ever +looked lovingly at any object? You may say yes because you do not know what it means +to look lovingly at an object. You may have looked lustfully at an object — that is another +thing. That is totally different, diametrically opposite. So first, the difference; try to feel +the difference. + +A beautiful face, a beautiful body — you look at it, and you feel that you are looking at it +lovingly. But why are you looking at it? Do you want to get something out of it? Then it +is lust, not love. Do you want to exploit it? Then it is lust, not love. + +Then really, you are thinking of how to use this body, how to possess it, how to make this +body an instrument for your happiness. + +Lust means how to use something for your happiness; love means your happiness is not +at all concerned. Really, lust means how to get something out of it and love means how to +give something. They are diametrically opposite. + +If you see a beautiful face and you feel love toward the face, the immediate feeling in +your consciousness will be how to do something to make this face happy, how to do +something to make this man or this woman happy. The concern is not with yourself, the +concern is with the other. + +In love the other is important; in lust you are important. In lust you are thinking how to +make the other your instrument; in love you are thinking how to become an instrument +yourself. In lust you are going to sacrifice the other; in love you are going to sacrifice +yourself. Love means giving; lust means getting. Love is a surrender; lust is an +aggression. + +What you say is meaningless. Even in lust you talk in tenns of love. Your language is not +very meaningful, so do not be deceived. Look within, and then you will come to +understand that you have not once in your life looked lovingly toward someone or some +object. + +The second distinction to be made: this sutra says, LOOK LOVINGLY ON SOME +OBJECT. Really, even if you look lovingly at something material, insentient, the object +will become a person. + +If you look lovingly at it, your love is the key to transform anything into a person. If you +look lovingly at a tree, the tree becomes a person. + +Just the other day I was talking with Vivek, a close disciple, and I told her that when we +move to the new ashram we will name every tree, because every tree is a person. Have +you ever heard of anyone naming a tree? No one names a tree because no one feels love +for it. If the case were otherwise, a tree would become a person. Then it is not just one in +a crowd, it becomes unique. + +You name dogs and cats. When you name a dog and you call it Tiger or something else, +the dog becomes a person. Then it is not just one dog amongst other dogs, it has a +personality; you have created a person. Whenever you look lovingly at something, it +becomes a person. + +And the contrary is also true. Whenever you look with lustful eyes toward a person, the +person becomes an object, a thing. That is why lustful eyes are repulsive — because no +one likes to become a thing. When you look at your wife with lustful eyes — or at any +other woman, or man, with lustful eyes — the other feels hurt. What are you doing really? +You are changing a person, a living person, into a dead instrument. You are thinking of +how to "use," and the person is killed. + + + +That is why lustful eyes are repulsive, ugly. When you look at someone with love, the +other is raised. + + +He becomes unique. Suddenly he becomes a person. A person cannot be replaced; a thing +can be replaced. A 'thing’ means that which is replaceable; a 'person’ means that which +cannot be replaced: there is no possibility of replacing him or her. A person is unique; a +thing is not unique. + +Love makes anything unique. That is why without love you never feel like a person. +Unless someone loves you deeply, you never feel that you have any uniqueness. You are +just one in a crowd — just a number, a datum. You can be changed. + +For example, if you are a clerk in an office or a teacher in a school or a professor in a +university, your professor-hood is replaceable. Another professor will replace you; he can +replace you at any moment because you are just used there as a professor. You have a +functional meaning and significance. + +If you are a clerk, someone else is easily able to do the work. The work will not wait for +you. If you die this moment, the next moment someone will replace you and the +mechanism will continue. You were just a figure — another figure will do. You were just +a utility. + +But then someone falls in love with this clerk or this professor. Suddenly the clerk is no +more a clerk; he has become a unique person. If he dies, then the beloved cannot replace +him. He is irreplaceable. Then the whole world may go on in the same way, but the one +who was in love cannot be the same. + +This uniqueness, this being a person, happens through love. + +This sutra says, LOOK LOVINGLY AT SOME OBJECT. It makes no distinction +between an object and a person. There is no need, because when you look lovingly +anything will become a person. The very look changes, transforms. + +You may or may not have observed what happens when you drive a particular car, say a +Fiat. There are thousands and thousands and thousands of Fiats exactly similar, but your +car, if you are in love with it, becomes unique — a person. It cannot be replaced; a +relationship is created. Now you feel this car as a person. If something goes wrong... a +slight sound, and you feel it. And cars are very temperamental. You kn ow the temper of +your car — when it feels good and when it feels bad. The car becomes, by and by, a +person. + +Why? If there is a love relationship, anything becomes a person. If there is a lust +relationship, then a person will become a thing. And this is one of the most inhuman acts +man can do — to make someone a thing. + +LOOK LOVINGLY AT SOME OBJECT... So what is one to do? When you look +lovingly, what are you to do? The first thing: forget yourself. Forget yourself completely! +Look at a flower and forget yourself completely. Let the flower be; you become +completely absent. Feel the flower, and a deep love will flow from your consciousness +toward the flower. And let your consciousness be filled with only one thought — how you +can help this flower to flower more, to become more beautiful, to become more blissful. + +What can you do? + +It is not meaningful whether you can do or not; that is not relevant. The feeling of what +you can do — this pain, this deep ache over what you can do to make this flower more +beautiful, more alive, more flowering — is meaningful. Let this thought reverberate into + + + +your whole being. Let every fiber of your body and mind feel it. You will be transfixed in +an ecstasy, and the flower will become a person. + +DO NOT GO ON TO ANOTHER OBJECT... You cannot go. If you are in a love +relationship, you cannot go. If you love someone in this group, then you forget the whole +crowd; only one face remains. Really, you do not see anyone else, you see only one face. +All the others are there, but they are subliminal — just on the periphery of your +consciousness. They are NOT. They are just shadows; only one face remains. If you love +someone then only that face remains, so you cannot move. + +Do not go to another object, remain with one. Remain with a roseflower or remain with a +beloved's face. Remain there loving, flowing, with just one heart, with the feeling of, +"What can I do to make the loved one happier, blissful?" + +HERE IN THE MIDDLE OF THE OBJECT - THE BLESSING. And when this is the +case you are absent, not concerned with yourself at all, not selfish, not thinking in terms +of your pleasure, your gratification. You have forgotten yourself completely, and you are +just thinking in terms of the other. + +The other has become the center of your love; your consciousness is flowing toward the +other. With deep compassion, with a deep feeling of love, you are thinking, "What can I +do to make the loved one blissful?" In this state, suddenly, HERE IN THE MIDDLE OF +THE OBJECT — THE BLESSING. Suddenly, as a by-product, the blessing comes to +you. Suddenly you become centered. + +This looks paradoxical because this sutra says to forget yourself completely, not to be +self-centered, to move to the other completely. Buddha is reported to have said +continuously that whenever you are praying, pray for others — never for yourself. +Otherwise the prayer is just useless. + +One man came to Buddha and he said, "I accept your teaching, but only one thing is very +difficult to accept. You say that whenever we do prayer we are not to think about +ourselves, we are not to ask anything about ourselves. We have to say, 'Whatsoever may +be the result of my prayer, let that result be distributed to all. If blessing happens, let it be +distributed to all.’" + +The man said, "This is okay, but can I make only one exception? Not to my immediate +neighbor — he is my enemy. Let this blessing be distributed to all except to my immediate +neighbor." + +The mind is self-centered, so Buddha said, "Your prayer is useless. Nothing will come +out of it unless you are ready to give all, to distribute all, and then all will be yours." + + +In love you are to forget yourself. It looks paradoxical: then when and how will the +centering happen? By being totally concerned with the other, with the other's happiness, +when you forget yourself completely and only the other remains there, suddenly you are +filled with bliss — the blessing. + +Why? Because when you are not concerned with yourself you become vacant, empty; the +inner space is created. When your mind is totally concerned with the other, you become +mindless within. Then there are no thoughts inside. And then this thought — "How can I +be helpful? How can I create more bliss? How can the other be more happy?" — cannot +continue any more, because really, there is nothing you can do. This thought becomes a +stop. There is nothing you can do. What can you do? If you think you can do, you are still +thinking in terms of yourself — ego. + + + +With the love object one becomes totally helpless — remember this. Whenever you love +someone you feel totally helpless. That is the agony of love: one cannot feel what he can +do. He wants to do everything, he wants to give the whole universe to the lover or the +beloved — but what can he do? If you think that you can do this or that, you are still not +in a love relationship. Love is very helpless, absolutely helpless, and that helplessness is +the beauty, because in that helplessness you are surrendered. + +Love someone and you will feel helpless; hate someone and you can do something. + +Love someone and you are absolutely helpless — because what can you do? Whatsoever +you can do seems insignificant, meaningless; it is never enough. Nothing can be done. +And when one feels that nothing can be done, one feels that one is helpless. When one +wants to do everything and feels nothing can be done, mind stops. In this helplessness +surrender happens. You are empty. That is why love becomes a deep meditation. + +Really, if you love someone, no other meditation is needed. But because no one loves, +one hundred and twelve methods are needed — and even they may not be enough. +Someone was here the other day. He was telling me, "It gives me much hope. I have +heard for the first time from you that there are one hundred and twelve methods. It gives +me much hope, but somewhere a depression also comes into the mind: only one hundred +and twelve methods? And if these one hundred and twelve methods don’t work for me, +then is there no one hundred and thirteenth?" + +And he is right. He is right! If these one hundred and twelve methods do not work for +you, then there is no go. So as he suggests, a depression also follows hope. But really, +methods are needed because the basic method is missing. If you can love, no method is +needed. + +Love itself is the greatest method, but love is difficult — in a way impossible. Love means +putting yourself out from your consciousness, and in the same place, where your ego has +been in existence, putting someone else. + +Replacing yourself by someone else means love — as if now you are not and only the +other is. + +Jean Paul Sartre says that the other is the hell, and he is right. He is right because the +other creates only hell for you. But he is wrong also because if the other can be hell, the +other can he heaven. If you live through lust, the other is a hell because then you are +trying to kill that person. You are trying to make that person a thing. Then that person +will also react and will try to make you a thing, and that creates hell. + +So every husband and every wife, they are creating hell for each other because each one +is trying to possess the other. Possession is possible only with things, never with persons. +You can only be possessed by a person; you can never possess a person. A thing can be +possessed, but you try to possess persons. Through that effort persons become things. If I +make you into a thing, you will react. Then I am your enemy. Then you will try to make a +thing out of me — that creates hell. + +You are sitting in your room alone, and then suddenly you become aware that someone is +peeping through the keyhole. Observe minutely what happens. Have you felt any change? +And why do you feel angry about this peeping Tom? He is not doing anything to you — +just peeping. Why do you feel angry? He has changed you into a thing. He is observing; +he has made you into a thing, into an object. + + +That gives you an uneasiness. + + + +And the same will happen to him if you come near the keyhole and look through it. The +other will become shattered, shocked. He was a subject just a moment before: he was the +observer and you were the observed. Now suddenly he has been caught. He has been +observed observing you, and now he has become a thing. + +When someone is observing you, suddenly you feel your freedom has been disturbed, +destroyed. That is why, unless you are in love with someone, you cannot stare. That stare +becomes ugly and violent — unless you are in love. If you are in love then a stare is a +beautiful thing, because your stare is not changing the other into a thing. Then you can +look directly into the eyes; then you can go deep into the eyes of the other. You are not +changing him into a thing. Rather, through your love your look is making him a person. +That is why only the stares of lovers are beautiful; otherwise stares are ugly. +Psychologists say there is a time limit. And you all know, observe and you will come to +know, what the time limit is for how long you can stare into someone's eyes, if he is a +stranger. There is a time limit. One moment more, and the other will become angry. Just +a passing look in public can be pardoned because it seems as if you were just seeing, not +looking. + +A look is a deep thing. If I just see you when passing, no relationship is created. + +Or I am passing and you look at me, just while passing — no offense is meant so it is +okay. But if you suddenly stand and look at me, you become an observer. Then your look +will disturb me and I will feel insulted: "What are you doing? I am a person, not a thing. +This is not the way to look." + +Because of this, clothes have become so meaningful. Only when you love someone can +you be easily naked, because the moment you are naked your whole body becomes an +object. Someone can look at your whole body, and if he is not in love with you his eyes +will turn your whole body, your whole being, into an object. But when you are in love +with someone you can be naked without feeling that you are naked. Rather, you would +like to be naked, because you would like this transfonning love to transfonn your whole +body into a person. + +Whenever you are turning someone into a thing, that act is immoral. But if you are filled +with love, then in that love-filled moment with any object this phenomenon, this blessing, +is possible. It happens. + +IN THE MIDDLE OF THE OBJECT - THE BLESSING. Suddenly you have forgotten +yourself — the other was there. Then when the right moment comes, when you are no +longer present, absolutely absent, the other will also become absent. And between the +two the blessing happens. That is what lovers feel. That blessing is also because of an +unknown, unconscious meditation. + + +When two lovers are there, by and by they both become absent. A pure existence remains +— without any egos, without any conflict... just a communion. In that communion one +feels blissful. It is wrongly inferred that the other has given that bliss to you. That bliss +has come because unknowingly you have fallen into a deep meditative technique. + +You can do it consciously — and when you do it consciously it goes deeper, because then +you are not obsessed with the object. This is happening every day. If you love someone, +you feel blissful not because of him or her, but because of love. And why because of +love? Because this phenomenon happens — this sutra happens. + +But then you become obsessed. Then you think that because of A, because of A's + + + +proximity, nearness, because of A's love this blessing happens. Then you think, "I must +possess A, because without A being present I may not be able to get this blessing again." +You become jealous. If someone else possesses A, then he will be blissful and you will +feel miserable, so you want to take away all possibilities of A being possessed by anyone +else. A should be possessed only by you, because you have glimpsed a different world +through him. Then the moment you try to possess, you will destroy the whole beauty and +the whole phenomenon. + +When the lover is possessed, love is gone. Then the lover is just a thing. + +You can use it, but the blessing will never come again, because that blessing was coming +when the other was a person. The other was made, created: you created the person in the +other, and the other created the person in you. No one was an object. Both were +subjectivities meeting — two persons meeting, not one person and one thing. + +But the moment you possess, this will become impossible. And mind will try to possess +because mind thinks in terms of greed: "One day bliss has happened, so it must happen to +me every day. So I must possess." But the bliss happens because there is no possession. +And the bliss happens not because of the other, really, but because of you. Remember +this, the bliss happens because of you. Because you are so absorbed in the other, the bliss +happens. + +It can happen with a roseflower, it can happen with a rock, it can happen with the trees, it +can happen with anything. Once you know the situation in which it happens, it can +happen anywhere. If you know that you are not, and with a deep love your consciousness +has moved to the other — to the trees, to the sky, to the stars, to anyone; when your total +consciousness is addressed to the other it leaves you, it moves away from you — in that +absence of the self is the blessing. + +The seventh technique: + +WITHOUT SUPPORT FOR FEET OR HANDS, SIT ONLY ON BUTTOCKS. +SUDDENLY, THE CENTERING. + + +This technique has been used by Taoists in China for centuries, and it is a wonderful +technique - one of the easiest. Try this: WITHOUT SUPPORT FOR FEET OR HANDS, +SIT ONLY ON BUTTOCKS. SUDDENLY, THE CENTERING. + +What is to be done? You will need two things. First, a very sensitive body, which you do +not have. You have a dead body; it is just a burden to be carried — not sensitive. First you +will have to make your body sensitive; otherwise this technique will not work. So first I +will tell you something about how to make your body sensitive, and particularly your +buttocks, because ordinarily your buttocks are the most insensitive part in your body. +They have to be. They have to be because you are sitting the whole day on your buttocks. +If they are too sensitive, it will be difficult. + +So your buttocks are insensitive — they need to be. Just like the soles of the feet, they are +insensitive. Continuously sitting on them, you never feel you are sitting on your buttocks. +Have you ever felt it before this? Now you can feel you are sitting on your buttocks, but +you have never felt it before — and you have been sitting on your buttocks your whole +life, never aware. Their function is such that they cannot be very sensitive. + +So first you have to make them sensitive. Try one very easy method... And this method +can be done to any part of the body; then the body will become sensitive. + + + +Just sit on a chair, relaxed, and close your eyes. Feel your left hand or your right hand — +either one. Feel your left hand. Forget the whole body and just feel the left hand. The +more you feel it, the more the left hand will become heavy. + +Go on feeling the left hand. Forget the whole body, just go on feeling the left hand as if +you are just the left hand. The hand will go on becoming more and more and more heavy. +As it goes on becoming heavy, go on feeling it becoming more heavy. Then try to feel +what is happening in the hand. Whatever the sensation, note it down: any sensation, any +jerk, any slight movement — note down in the mind that this is happening. And go on +doing it every day for at least three weeks. At any time during the day, do it for ten +minutes, fifteen minutes. Just feel the left hand and forget the whole body. + +Within three weeks you will feel you have a new left hand, or a new right hand. It will be +so sensitive. And you will become aware of very minute and delicate sensations in the +hand. + +When you succeed with the hand, then try with the buttocks. Then try: close your eyes +and feel that only two buttocks exist; you are no more. Let your whole consciousness go +to the buttocks. It is not difficult. If you try, it is wonderful. And the feeling of aliveness +that comes in the body is in itself very blissful. Then, when you can feel your buttocks +and they can become very sensitive, when you can feel anything happening inside — a +slight movement, a slight pain or anything — then you can observe and you can know. + +Then your consciousness is joined to the buttocks. + +First try it with the hand. Because the hand is very sensitive, it is easy. Once you gain the +confidence that you can sensitize your hand, this confidence will help you to sensitize +your buttocks. Then do this technique. So you will need at least six weeks before you can +enter this technique — three weeks with your hand and then three weeks with your +buttocks, just making them more and more sensitive. + +Lying on the bed, forget the whole body. Just remember that only two buttocks are left. +Feel the touch — the bedsheet, the coldness or the slowly coming warmth. Feel it. Lying +down in your bathtub, forget the body. Remember only the buttocks — feel. Stand against +a wall with your buttocks touching the wall — feel the coldness of the wall. Stand with +your beloved, with your wife or husband, buttock to buttock — feel the other through the +buttocks. This is just to "create" your buttocks, to bring them to a situation where they +start feeling. + +Then do this technique: WITHOUT SUPPORT FOR FEET OR HANDS... Sit on the +ground. WITHOUT SUPPORT FOR FEET OR HANDS, SIT ONLY ON THE +BUTTOCKS. The Buddha posture will do; PADMASANA will do. Or SIDDHASANA +will do, or any ordinary asana, but it is good not to use your hands. Just remain on the +buttocks; sit only on the buttocks. Then what to do? Just close your eyes. Feel the +buttocks touching the ground. + +And because the buttocks have become sensitive, you will feel that one buttock is +touching more. You are leaning on one buttock, and the other is touching less. Then +move the leaning to the other. Immediately move to the other; then come to the first. Go +on moving from one to the other, and then by and by, balance. + +Balancing means that both of your buttocks are feeling the same. Your weight on both of +the buttocks is exactly the same. And when your buttocks are sensitive this will not be +difficult, you will feel it. Once both your buttocks are balanced, SUDDENLY, THE +CENTERING. With that balance, suddenly you will be thrown to your navel center, and + + + +you will be centered inside. You will forget the buttocks, you will forget the body. You +will be thrown to the inner center. + +That is why I say centers are not meaningful, but centering is — whether it happens at the +heart or at the head or at the buttocks, or anywhere. You have seen buddhas sitting. You +may not have imagined that they are balancing their buttocks. You go to a temple and see +Mahavir sitting, Buddha sitting; you may never have imagined that this sitting is just a +balancing on the buttocks. It is — and when there is no imbalance, suddenly that balance +gives you the centering. + +The eighth technique: + +IN A MOVING VEHICLE, BY RHYTHMICALLY SWAYING, EXPERIENCE. OR IN +A STILL VEHICLE, BY LETTING YOURSELF SWING IN SLOWING INVISIBLE +CIRCLES. + + +It is the same in a different way. IN A MOVING VEHICLE... You are traveling in a train +or in a bullock cart — when this technique was developed there was only the bullock cart. +You are moving in a bullock cart on an Indian road — even today the road is the same. + +But when you are moving, your whole body is moving. Then it is useless. + +IN A MOVING VEHICLE, BY RHYTHMICALLY SWAYING... Sway rhythmically. +Try to understand; this is very minute. Whenever you are in a bullock cart or in any +vehicle, you are resisting. The bullock cart sways to the left, but you resist it. You sway +to the right in order to balance; otherwise you will fall down. So you are constantly +resisting. Sitting in a bullock cart, you are fighting its movements. It moves to this side, +and you have to move to that. + +That is why when sitting in a train you become tired. You have not been doing anything. +Why do you become so tired? You have been doing much unknowingly. You were +fighting the train continuously; there was resistance. Do not resist — this is the first thing. +If you want to do this technique, do not resist. Rather, move with the movements, sway +with the movements. Become part of the bullock cart, do not resist it. Whatsoever the +bullock cart is doing on the road, become part of it. That is why children are never tired +of journeying. + +Poonam, a disciple, has just come from London with her two children, and she was afraid +that they may get ill, that they may get tired because of such a long journey. + +She became tired, and they came laughing. She became completely tired when she came +here. The moment she entered my room she was dead tired, and the two children started +playing right then and there. An eighteen-hour- long journey from London to Bombay and +they were not a bit tired. Why? Because they do not know how to resist yet. + +So a drunkard can sit in a bullock cart for the whole night, and in the morning he will be +as fresh as ever, but you will not be. It is because a drunkard cannot resist. He moves +with the cart; there is no fight. The fighting is not there, he is one. IN A MOVING +VEHICLE, BY RHYTHMICALLY SWAYING... So do one thing: do not resist. And the +second thing, create a rhythm. Create a rhythm in your movements. Make it a beautiful +hannony. Forget about the road; do not curse the road and the government — forget them. +Do not curse the bullock and the bullock cart, or the driver — forget them. Close your +eyes, do not resist. Move rhythmically and create a music in your movement. Make it as +if it is a dance. IN A MOVING VEHICLE, BY RHYTHMICALLY SWAYING, + + + +EXPERIENCE. The sutra says the experience will come to you. + +OR IN A STILL VEHICLE... Do not ask where to get a bullock cart; do not deceive +yourself, because the sutra says, OR IN A STILL VEHICLE, BY LETTING +YOURSELF SWING IN SLOWING INVISIBLE CIRCLES. Just sitting here, swing in a +circle. First take a big circle, then go on slowing it. + +.. slowing, slowing, making it smaller and smaller and smaller, until your body is not +visibly moving, but inside you feel a subtle movement. + +Start with a bigger circle, with closed eyes. Otherwise, when the body will stop you will +stop. With closed eyes make big circles; just sitting, swing in a circle. Go on swinging, +making the circle smaller and smaller and smaller. Visibly you will stop; no one will be +able to detect that you are still moving. But inside you will feel a subtle movement. Now +the body is not moving, only the mind. Go on making it slower and slower, and +experience. That will become a centering. In a vehicle, in a moving vehicle, a non- +resisting rhythmical movement will create a centering within you. + +Gurdjieff created many dances for such techniques. He was working on this technique. +All the dances he was using in his school were, really, swaying in circles. All the dances +were in circles — just whirling but remaining aware inside, by and by making the circles +smaller and smaller. A time comes when the body stops, but the mind inside goes on +moving, moving, moving. + +If you have been traveling in a train for twenty hours, after you have come home, after +you have left the train, if you close your eyes you will feel that you are still traveling. +Still you are traveling. The body has stopped, but the mind is still feeling the vehicle. So +just do this technique. + + +Gurdjieff created phenomenal dances, very beautiful. In this century he worked miracles +— not miracles like Satya Sai Baba. Those are not miracles; any street magician can do +them. But Gurdjieff really created miracles. He prepared a group of a hundred people for +meditative dancing, and he was showing that dance to an audience in New York for the +first time. A hundred dancers were on the stage whirling. Those who were in the +audience, even their minds began whirling. There were a hundred white -robed dancers +just whirling. + +When he indicated with his hand, they would whirl, and the moment he would say, +"Stop," there would be dead silence. That was a stop for the audience, but not for the +dancers — because the body can stop immediately, but the mind then takes the movement +inside; it goes on and on. It was beautiful even to look at, because a hundred persons +suddenly became dead statues. It created a sudden shock in the audience also, because a +hundred movements — beautiful movements, rhythmical movements — suddenly stopped. +You would be looking at them moving, whirling, dancing, and suddenly the dancers +stopped. Then your thought would also stop. + +Many in New York felt that it was a weird phenomenon: their thoughts stopped +immediately. But for the dancers, the dance continued inside, and the inside whirling +circles became smaller and smaller until they became centered. + + +One day it happened that they were coming just to the edge of the stage, dancing. It was +expected, supposed, that Gurdjieff would stop them just before they danced down the + + + +stage onto the audience. A hundred dancers were just on the edge of the stage. One step +more and they would all fall down into the hall. The whole hall was expecting that +suddenly Gurdjieff would say stop, but he turned his back to light his cigar. He turned his +back to the dancers to light his cigar, and the whole group of a hundred dancers fell down +from the stage upon the floor — on a naked stone floor. + +The whole audience stood up. They were screaming, shouting, and they were thinking +that many must have broken their bones — it was such a crash. But not a single one was +hurt; not even a single bruise was there. + +They asked Gurdjieff what had happened. No one had been hurt, and the crash was such +that it seemed impossible. The reason was only this: they were really not in their bodies +at that moment. They were slowing down their inner circling. And when Gurdjieff saw +that now they were completely oblivious of their bodies, he allowed them to fall down. + +If you are completely oblivious of your body, there is no resistance. A bone is broken +because of resistance. If you are falling down, you resist: you go against the pull of +gravity. That going against, that resistance, is the problem — not gravity. + +If you can fall down with gravity, if you can cooperate with it, then no possibility of +being hurt will arise. + +This sutra: IN A MOVING VEHICLE, BY RHYTHMICALLY SWAYING, +EXPERIENCE. OR IN A STILL VEHICLE, BY LETTING YOURSELF SWING IN +SLOWING INVISIBLE CIRCLES. You can do it. There is no need of a vehicle, just +whirl like children do. When your mind goes crazy, and you feel that now you will fall +down, do not stop — go on! Even if you fall down, do not worry about it, close your eyes +and whirl. Your mind will get whirled, and you will fall down. When your body has +fallen down, inside, feel! The whirling will continue. And it will come nearer and nearer +and nearer, and suddenly you will be centered. + +Children enjoy this very much because they get a great kick. Parents never allow their +children to whirl. It is not good: they should be allowed — rather, encouraged. And if you +can make them aware of inner whirling also, you can teach them meditation through their +whirling. They enjoy it because they have a bodiless feeling. When they whirl, suddenly +children become aware that their body is whirling but they are not. Inside they feel a +centering which we cannot feel so easily, because their bodies and souls are still a bit +apart; there is a gap. + +When you come into your mother's womb, you cannot immediately get totally in the +body; it takes time. When a child is bom, then too he is not absolutely fixed, his soul is +not absolutely fixed to the body; there are gaps. + +That is why there are many things which he cannot do. His body is ready to do it, but he +cannot do it. + +If you have observed, you may have noticed that newly-bom children cannot see with +two eyes, they always see with one eye. If you observe, then you will see that when they +observe and see anything, they cannot see with two eyes. They always look with one eye +— one eye gets bigger. The pupil of one eye will become bigger, and the other pupil will +remain small. The consciousness of a newborn child is not yet fixed, it is loose. By and +by it will become fixed, and then they will look with two eyes. + +They cannot yet feel their own body and others' bodies as different. It is difficult. They +are not yet fixed, but fixation will come, by and by. + +Meditation is again trying to create a gap. You have become fixed, solidly fixed in your + + + +body. That is why you feel, "I am the body." If a gap can be created, then only can you +feel that you are not the body but something beyond the body. Swaying and whirling are +helpful. They create the gap. + +THE NINTH TECHNIQUE: PIERCE SOME PART OF YOUR NECTAR-FILLED +FORM WITH A PIN, AND GENTLY ENTER THE PIERCING AND ATTAIN TO +THE INNER PURITY. + +This sutra says, PIERCE SOME PART OF YOUR NECTAR-FILLED FORM... Your +body is not just a body, it is fdled with you, and that you is the nectar. Pierce your body. + +When you are piercing your body, you are not pierced — only the body is pierced. But +you feel the pierce as if you have been pierced; that is why you feel pain. If you can +become aware that only the body is pierced, that you are not pierced, instead of pain you +will feel bliss. There is no need to do it with a pin. Many things happen every day; you +can use those situations for meditation. Or you can create a situation. + +Some pain is there in your body. Do one thing: forget the whole body, just concentrate on +the part of the body which is painful. And then a strange thing will be noted. When you +concentrate on the part of the body which is painful, you see that part is shrinking. First +you feel that the pain, the ache, is in your whole leg. When you concentrate, then you feel +it is not in the whole leg. It was exaggerated — it is just at the knee. + +Concentrate more, and you will feel it is not on the whole knee but just on a pinpoint. +Concentrate more on the pinpoint; forget the whole body. Just close your eyes and go on +concentrating in order to find where the pain is. It will go on shrinking; the area will +become smaller and smaller. Then a moment will come when it will be just a pinpoint. + +Go on staring at the pinpoint, and suddenly the pinpoint will disappear and you will be +filled with bliss. Instead of pain you will be filled with bliss. + +Why does this happen? Because you and your body are two, they are not one. + +The one who is concentrating is you. The concentration is being done on the body — that +is the object. When you concentrate, the gap is broadened, the identification is broken. +Just to have concentration you move inside, away from the body. To bring the spot of +pain into perspective, you have to move away. That moving away creates the gap. And +when you are concentrating on the pain, you forget the identification, you forget that "I +am feeling pain." + +Now you are the observer and the pain is somewhere else. You are observing the pain, +not feeling the pain. This change from feeling to observation creates the gap. And when +the gap is bigger, suddenly you forget the body completely; you are aware only of +consciousness. + +You can try this technique also: PIERCE SOME PART OF YOUR NECTAR-FILLED +BODY WITH A PIN, AND GENTLY ENTER THE PIERCING. If there is pain, then +first you will have to concentrate on the whole area; then by and by it will come to a +pinpoint. + +But there is no need to wait. You can use a pin. Use a pin on any part which is sensitive. +On the body many spots are blind spots; they will not be useful. You may not have heard +about blind spots on the body. Then give a pin to anyone, to your friend, and sit, and tell +your friend to pierce your back with the pin at many points. At many points you will feel +no pain. You will say, "No, you have not pierced yet. + + + +I am not feeling any pain." Those are blind spots. Just on your cheeks there are two blind +spots which can be tested. + +If you go to Indian villages, many times in religious festivals they will pierce their cheeks +with an arrow. It looks like a miracle, but it is not. The cheeks have two blind spots. If +you pierce through these blind spots, no blood will come out and there will be no pain. + +On your back there are thousands of dead spots, where you cannot feel any pain. Your +body has two types of spots — sensitive, alive ones, and those that are dead. So find a +sensitive spot where you can feel even a slight touch. Then pierce the pin and ENTER +THE PIERCING. That is the thing; that is meditation. And GENTLY enter the piercing. +As the pin moves inside, into your skin, and you feel the pain, you also enter. Do not feel +that the pain is entering you; do not feel the pain, do not be identified with it. Enter with +the pin. Pierce with the pin. + +Close your eyes; observe the pain. As the pain is piercing in, you also pierce you. And +with the pin piercing you, your mind will become easily concentrated. Use that point of +pain, of intense pain, and observe it. That is what is meant by GENTLY ENTER THE +PIERCING. + +AND ATTAIN TO THE INNER PURITY. If you can enter observing, unidentified, +aloof, standing far away, not feeling that the pain is piercing you, but observing that the +pin is piercing the body and you are an observer, you will attain to the inner purity; the +inner innocence will be revealed to you. + +For the first time you will become aware that you are not the body. And once you know +that you are not the body your life is changed completely, because your whole life is +around the body. Once you know you are not the body, you cannot continue this life. The +center is being missed. + +When you are not the body, then you have to create a different life. That life is the +sannyasin's life. It is a different life; the center is different now. Now you exist in the +world as a soul, as an ATMAN, not as a body. If you exist as a body, then you have +created a different world: of material gain, greed, gratification, lust, sex. You have +created a world around you; this is the body-oriented world. + +Once you know you are not the body, your whole world disappears. You cannot support +it any more. A different world arises which is around the soul — a world of compassion, +of love, of beauty, of truth, of goodness, of innocence. The center is shifted, and it is not +in the body now. It is in the consciousness. + +Enough for today. + + +THE END. + + + +Chapter 14: Changing the direction of energy + + +Question 1 + +IF ENLIGHTENMENT AND SAMADHI MEAN TOTAL CONSCIOUSNESS, +COSMIC CONSCIOUSNESS, ALL-PERVADING CONSCIOUSNESS, THEN IT +SEEMS VERY STRANGE TO CALL THIS STATE OF COSMIC CONSCIOUSNESS +CENTERING, AS THE WORD 'CENTERING’ IMPLIES ONE-POINTEDNESS. WHY +IS COSMIC CONSCIOUSNESS, OR SAMADHI, CALLED CENTERING? + +Centering is the path, not the goal. Centering is the method, not the result. Samadhi is not +called centering; centering is the technique to samadhi. Of course, they look +contradictory because when one realizes, becomes enlightened, there is no center left. +Jacob Boehme has said that when one comes to the divine it can be described in two +ways: either the center is everywhere now, or the center is nowhere; both mean the same +thing. So the word 'centering’ seems contradictory, but the path is not the goal and the +method is not the result. And method can be contradictory. So we have to understand it +because these one hundred and twelve methods are methods of centering. + +But once you become centered you will explode. Centering is just to gather yourself +totally at one point. Once you are gathered at one point, crystallized at one point, that +point explodes automatically. Then there is no center — or then the center is everywhere. +So centering is a means to explode. + +Why does centering become the method? If you are not centered your energy is +unfocused, it cannot explode. + +It is spread out; it cannot explode. Explosion needs great energy. Explosion means that +now you are not spread out — you are at one point. You become atomic; you become, +really, a spiritual atom. And only when you are centered enough to become an atom can +you explode. Then there is an atomic explosion. + +That explosion is not talked about because it cannot be, so only the method is given. The +result is not talked about. It cannot be talked about. If you do the method the result will +follow, and there is no way to express it. + +So remember this: basically, religion never talks about the experience itself, it talks only +about the method; it shows the how, not the what. The what is left to you. If you do the +how, the what will come to you. And there is no way to convey it. One can know it, but +he cannot convey it. It is such an infinite experience that language becomes useless. The +vastness is such that no word is capable of expressing it. So only the method is given. +Buddha is reported to have said continuously for forty years, "Do not ask me about the +truth, about the divine, about nirvana, liberation. Do not ask me anything about such +things. Just ask me how to reach there. I can show you the path, but I cannot give you the +experience, not even in words." The experience is personal; method is impersonal. +Method is scientific, impersonal; experience is always personal and poetic. + + +What do I mean when I differentiate in this way? Method is scientific. If you can do it, +centering will result. That centering is bound to result if the method is done. If the +centering is not happening, then you can know that you are missing the point somewhere. +Somewhere you have missed the method; you have not followed it. Method is scientific; +centering is scientific; but when the explosion comes to you, it is poetic. + + + +By poetic, I mean every one of you will experience it in a different way. Then there is no +common ground. And everyone will express it in a different way. Buddha says +something, Mahavir says something, Krishna says something else, and Jesus, + +Mohammed, Moses and Lao Tsu, they all differ — not in methods, but in the way they +express their experience. Only on one thing do they all agree, that whatsoever they are +saying is not expressing that which they have felt. Only on that one point do they agree. +Still, they try. Still, they try to convey somehow, to hint. It seems impossible, but if you +have a sympathetic heart something may be conveyed. But that needs a deep sympathy +and love and reverence. So really, whenever something is conveyed it doesn't depend on +the conveyer, it depends on you. If you can receive it in deep love and reverence, then +something reaches you. But if you are critical about it, then nothing reaches. Firstly, it is +difficult to express. + +And even if it is expressed you are critical — then the message becomes impossible; there +is no communication. + +The communication is very delicate. That is why in all these one hundred and twelve +methods it has been left out completely — only hinted at. Shiva says so many times: "Do +this, and then the experience," and then he becomes silent. "Do this, and then the +blessing," and then he becomes silent. + +"The blessing, the experience, the explosion": beyond them there is personal experience. +With that which cannot be expressed, it is better not to try to express it — because if +expression is tried with that which cannot be expressed, it will be misunderstood. So +Shiva is silent. He is talking simply of methods, techniques, of how to do it. + +But centering is not the end; it is just the path. And why does centering happen, develop, +grow into an explosion? Because if much energy is centered at one point, the point will +explode. The point is so small and the energy is so great, the point cannot contain it; +hence the explosion. + +This bulb can contain a particular quantity of electricity. If there is more electricity, the +bulb will explode. That is the reason for centering: the more you are centered, the more +energy is at your center. The moment there is much energy, the center won't be able to +contain it. It will explode. + +So it is scientific; it is just a scientific law. + +And if the center is not exploding, that means you are still not centered. Once you are +centered, immediately the explosion follows. There is no time gap. So if you feel that the +explosion is not coming, it means that you are still not focused. Still you do not have one +center, still you have many centers, still you are divided, still your energy is dissipated, +still your energy is moving out. + +When the energy moves out you are just being emptied of energy, dissipated. Ultimately +you will become impotent. Really, when death comes you have already died; you are just +a dead cell. You have been constantly throwing energy outward — so whatsoever may be +the quantity of energy, within a period you will become empty. Outgoing energy means +death. You are dying every moment; your energy is being emptied; you are throwing +your energy, dissipating it. + +They say that even the sun which has been there for millions and millions of years, such a +great reservoir of energy, is being emptied constantly. And within four billion years it +will die. The sun will die simply because there will be no energy to radiate. Every day it +is dying because the rays are carrying its energy toward the boundaries of the universe, if + + + +there are any boundaries. The energy is going out. + +Only man is capable of transforming and changing the direction of energy. Otherwise +death is a natural phenomenon — everything dies. + +Only man is capable of knowing the immortal, the deathless. + +So you can reduce this whole thing into a law. If energy is moving out, death will be the +result and you will never know what life means. You can only know a slow dying. You +can never feel the intensity of being alive. If energy moves out then death is the +automatic result — of anything, whatsoever. If you can change the direction of energy — +energy not moving out, but moving in — then a mutation, a transfonnation happens. + +Then this energy coming in becomes centered at one point in you. That point is just near +the navel — because really, you are bom as a navel. You are connected with your mother +at the navel. The life energy of the mother is being poured into you through the navel. +And once the navel cord is cut, you are separated from the mother, you become an +individual. Before that you are not an individual, just part of your mother. + +So real birth takes place when the navel cord is cut. Then the child takes its own life, +becomes its own center. That center is bound to be just at the navel, because through the +navel the energy comes to the child. That was the connecting link. And still, whether you +are aware or not, your navel remains the center. + +If energy begins to pour in, if you change the direction of the energy so that it comes in, +it will hit the navel. It will go on coming in and become centered at the navel. + +When it is so much that the navel cannot contain it, that the center cannot contain it any +longer, the center explodes. In that explosion, again you are no longer an individual. You +were not an individual when you were connected with your mother; again you will not be +an individual. + +A new birth has taken place. You have become one with the cosmos. Now you do not +have any center; you cannot say "I." Now there is no ego. A Buddha, a Krishna, goes on +talking and using the word 'I'. That is simply formal; they do not have any ego. They are +NOT. + +Buddha was dying. The day he was to die, many, many people, disciples, sannyasi, +gathered, and they were sad; they were weeping and crying. So Buddha asked, "Why are +you weeping?" Someone said, "Because soon you will be no more." + +Buddha laughed and said, "But I have been no more for forty years. I died the day I +became enlightened. The center has not been there for forty years. So do not weep, do not +be sad. No one is dying now. I am no more! But still the word T has to be used even to +denote that I am no more." + +Energy moving in is the whole of religion, is what is meant by the religious search. How +to move the energy, how to create a total about turn? These methods help. So remember, +centering is not samadhi, centering is not the experience. Centering is the door to the +experience, and when there is the experience there is no centering. + +So centering is just a passage. + +You are not centered now: you are multi-centered really. That is why I say you are not +centered now. When you become centered, there is only one center. Then the energy that +has been moving to multi-centers has come back; it is a homecoming. Then you are at +your center; then... explosion. Again the center is no more, but then you are not multi- +centered. Then there is no center at all. You have become one with the cosmos. Then + + + +existence and you mean one and the same thing. + +For example, an iceberg is floating in the sea. The iceberg has a center of its own. It has a +separate individuality; it is separate from the ocean. Deep down it is not separate, because +it is nothing but water at a particular degree of temperature. The difference between the +ocean water and the iceberg is not in their nature — naturally, they are the same. The +difference is only of temperature. And then the sun rises, and the atmosphere becomes +hot, and the iceberg begins to melt. Then there is no iceberg: it has melted. Now you +cannot find it because there is no individuality, no center in it. It has become one with the +ocean. + +In you and in Buddha, in those who were crucifying Jesus and in Jesus, in Krishna and in +Arjuna, there is no difference in nature. Arjuna is like an iceberg and Krishna is like an +ocean. There is no difference in nature. They both are one and the same, but Arjuna has a +form, a name — an individual, isolated existence. + +He feels, "I am." + +Through these methods of centering, the temperature will change, the iceberg will melt, +and then there will be no difference. That oceanic feeling is samadhi; that being an +iceberg is mind. And to feel oceanic is to be a no-mind. + +Centering is just the passage, the point of transformation from which the iceberg will be +no more. Before it there was no ocean — only an iceberg. After it there will be no iceberg +— only ocean. The oceanic feeling is samadhi: it is to feel oneself one with the whole. + +But I am not saying to think oneself one with the whole. You can think, but thinking is +before centering; that is not realization. You do not know — you have only heard; you +have read. You wish that someday this may happen to you also, but you have not +realized. Before centering you can go on thinking, but that thinking is of no use. After +centering there is no thinker. You know! It has happened! You are no more; only the +ocean is. Centering is the method. Samadhi is the end. + +Nothing has been said about what happens in samadhi because nothing can be said. And +Shiva is very scientific. He is not interested at all in telling. He is telegraphic; he will not +use a single extra word. So he simply hints: "The experience, the blessing, the +happening." Not only this, sometimes he will simply say, "Then." He will say, "Be +centered between two breaths and THEN." + +And then he will stop. Then sometimes he will simply say, "Be in the middle, just in the +middle between two extremes, and THAT." + +These are indications — "That, then, the experience, the blessing, the happening, the +explosion." But then he stops completely. Why? We would like him to say something +more. + +Two reasons. One: THAT cannot be explained. Why can it not be explained? There are +thinkers — for example, modern positivists, language analysts and others in Europe — +who say that which can be experienced can be explained. And they have a point to make. +They say if you can experience it, then why cannot you tell of it. After all, what is an +experience? You have understood it, so why can you not make it understood for others? +So they say that if there is any experience, then it can be expressed. And if you cannot +express it, it shows simply that there is no experience. Then you are a muddlehead — +confused, blurred. And if you cannot even express it, then there is no possibility that you +will be able to experience. + +Because of this standpoint, they say religion is all hokum. Why can you not express it if + + + +you can say you have experienced? Their point appeals to many, but their argument is +baseless. Leave aside religious experiences, ordinary experiences also cannot be +explained and expressed — very simple experiences. + +I have a pain in my head, and if you have never experienced a headache, I cannot explain +to you what a headache means. + +That doesn’t mean that I am muddleheaded; that doesn’t mean that I am only thinking and +I am not experiencing. The headache is there. I experience it in its totality, in its full +painfulness. But if you have not experienced a headache, it cannot be explained, it cannot +be expressed to you. If you also have experienced it, then of course there is no problem, it +can be expressed. + +Buddha's difficulty is that he has to talk with non-buddhas — not non-Buddhists, because +non-Buddhists can also be buddhas. Jesus is a non-Buddhist, but he is a buddha. Because +Buddha is to communicate with those who have not experienced, there is a difficulty. + +You do not know what a headache is. There are many who have not known headaches. +They have only heard the word; it means nothing to them. + +You can talk with a blind man about light, but nothing is conveyed. He hears the word +Tight', he hears the explanation. He can understand the whole theory of light, but still the +word Tight' conveys nothing to him. Unless he can experience, communication is +impossible. So note it: communication is possible only if two persons are communicating +who have had the same experience. + +We are able to communicate in ordinary life because our experiences are similar. But +even then, if one is going to split hairs then there will be difficulties. I say the sky is blue +and you also say the sky is blue, but how are we to decide that my experience of blue and +your experience of blue is the same? There is no possible way to decide. + + +I may be looking at one shade of blue and you may be looking at a different shade of +blue, but what I am looking at inside, what I am experiencing, cannot be conveyed to +you. I can simply say "blue." You also say "blue," but blue has a thousand shades — and +not only shades, 'blue' has thousands of meanings. In my pattern of mind, blue may mean +one thing. To you it may mean something else, because blue is not the meaning. The +meaning is always in the pattern of the mind. So even in common experiences it is +difficult to communicate. + +Moreover, there are experiences which are of the beyond. For example, someone has +fallen in love. He experiences something. His whole life is at stake, but he cannot explain +what has happened to him, what is happening to him. He can weep, he can sing, he can +dance; these are indications that something is happening in him. But what is happening in +him? When love happens to someone, what is happening really? And love is not very +uncommon. It happens to everyone in some way or other. But still, we have not been able +to express yet what happens inside. + +There are persons who feel love as a fever, as a sort of disease. Rousseau says that youth +is not the peak of human life, because youth is prone to the disease called love. Unless +one becomes so old that love loses all meaning, mind remains muddled and puzzled. So +wisdom is possible only in very, very old age. + + +Love will not allow you to be wise — that is his feeling. + +There are others who may feel differently. Those who are really wise will become silent + + + +about love. They will not say anything — because the feeling is so infinite, so deep, that +language is bound to betray it. And if it is expressed then one feels guilty, because one +can never do justice to the feeling of the infinite. So one remains silent: the deeper the +experience, the less the possibility of expression. + +Buddha remained silent about God not because there is no God. And those who are very +much vocal about God really show they have no experience. Buddha remained silent. +Whenever he would go to any town, he would declare, "Please, do not ask anything about +God. You can ask anything, but not about God." + +Scholars, pundits, who had no experience really but only knowledge, started talking +about Buddha and creating rumors, saying, "He is silent because he doesn't know. If he +kn ows then why will he not say?" And Buddha would laugh. That laughter could be +understood only by very few. + +If love cannot be expressed, then how can God be expressed? Then any expression is +hannful — that is one thing. That is why Shiva is silent about the experience. He goes to +the point from where a finger can be used as an indication — "Then, that, the +experience" — and then he becomes silent. + +The second reason is: even if it can be expressed in a certain way, even if it can be +expressed only partially. + +.. Even if it cannot be expressed, really, then too some parallels can be created to help. + +But those too Shiva is not using, and there is a reason. It is because our minds are so +greedy that whenever something is said about that experience the mind clings to it. And +then the mind forgets the method and remembers only the experience, because method +needs effort — a long effort which is sometimes tedious, sometimes dangerous. A long +sustained effort is needed. + +So we forget about the method. We remember the result and we go on imagining, +wishing, desiring the result. And one can fool oneself very easily. One can imagine that +the result has been achieved. + +Someone was here a few days before. He is a sannyasin — an old man, a very old man. + +He took sannyas thirty years ago; now he is near seventy. He came to me and he said, "I +have come to make some inquiries, to know something." + +So I asked him, "What do you want to know?" + +Suddenly he changed. He said, "No, not to know really — just to meet you, because +whatsoever can be known I have known already." + +For thirty years he has been imagining, desiring — desiring bliss, divine experiences — +and now, at this late age, he has become weak and death is near. Now he is creating +hallucinations that he has experienced. So I told him, "If you have experienced, then keep +silent. Be here with me for a few moments because then there is no need to talk." + + +Then he became restless. He said, "Okay! Then suppose that I have not experienced. + +Then tell me something." + +So I told him, "There is no possibility with me to suppose anything. Either you have +kn own or you have not known," I said. "So be clear about it. If you have known, then +keep quiet. Be here for a few moments and then go. If you have not known, then be clear. +Then tell me so." + +Then he was puzzled. He had come to inquire about some methods. Then he said, + +"Really, I have not experienced, but I have been thinking so much about AHAM + + + +BRAHMASMI — I am the BRAHMAN — that sometimes I forget that I have only been +thinking. I have repeated it so much, day and night, for thirty years continuously, that +sometimes I completely forget that I have not known this. It is just a borrowed saying." + +It is difficult to remember what is knowledge and what is experience. They get confused; +they get mingled and mixed. And it is very easy to feel that your knowledge has become +your experience. The human mind is so deceptive, so cunning, that that is possible. That +is another reason why Shiva has remained silent about the experience. He will not say +anything about it. He goes on talking about methods, remaining completely silent about +the result. You cannot be deceived by him. + +That is one of the reasons why this book, one of the most significant of books, has +remained altogether unknown. + +This VIGYANA BHAIRAVA TANTRA is one of the most significant books in the +world. No Bible, no Veda, no Gita is so significant, but it has remained completely +unknown. The reason? It contains only simple methods without any possibility for your +greed to cling to the result. + +The mind wants to cling to the result. The mind is not interested in the method; it is +interested in the end result. And if you can bypass the method and reach the result, the +mind will be extremely happy. + +Someone was asking me, "Why so many methods? Kabir has said, 'SAHAJ SAMADHI +BHALI — be spontaneous.' Spontaneous ecstasy is good, so there is no need of +methods." + +I told him, "If you have achieved SAHAJ SAMADHI — spontaneous ecstasy — then of +course no method is useful; there is no need. Why have you come here?" + +He said, "I have not achieved yet, but I feel that SAHAJ — the spontaneous — is better." +"But why do you feel that the spontaneous is better?" I said. Because no method is +suggested, the mind feels good that you have nothing to do — and without doing, you can +have EVERYTHING ! + +Because of this Zen has become a craze in the West — because Zen says, achieve it +effortlessly; there is no need of effort. Zen is right; there is no need for an effort. But +remember, to achieve this point of no-effort you will need a long, long effort. To achieve +a point where no effort is needed, to achieve a point where you can remain in non-doing, +a long effort will be needed. + +But the superficial conclusion that Zen says no effort is needed has become very +appealing in the West. If no effort is needed then the mind says: this is the right thing, +because you can do it without doing anything. But no one can do it. + +Suzuki, who made Zen known in the West, has done a service and also a disservice. And +the disservice will remain for a longer period. He was a very authentic man, one of the +most authentic men of this century, and for his whole life he struggled to carry the +message of Zen to the West. And alone, with his own effort, he made it known in the +West. And now there is a craze; there are Zen friends all over the West. Nothing appeals +like Zen now. + +But the point is missed. The appeal has come only because Zen says no method is +needed, no effort is needed. You do not have to do anything; spontaneously it flowers. +This is right — but you are not spontaneous, so it will never flower in you. To be +spontaneous... It looks absurd and contradictory, because for you to be spontaneous many +methods are needed to purify you, to make you innocent so that you can be spontaneous. + + + +Otherwise you cannot be spontaneous in anything. + +This VIGYANA BHAIRAVA TANTRA was translated into English by Paul Reps. He +has written a very beautiful book, ZEN FLESH, ZEN BONES, and just in the appendix +he included this book VIGYANA BHAIRAVA TANTRA. + +The whole book is concerned with Zen; just in the appendix he added this book also, the +one hundred and twelve methods, and he called it a pre-Zen writing. Many Zen followers +didn't like this because they said, "Zen says no effort is needed, and this book is +concerned only with effort. This book is concerned only with methods, and Zen says no +method, no effort is needed. So it is anti-Zen, not pre-Zen." Superficially they are right, +but deep down they are not, because to achieve a spontaneous being one has to travel a +long way. + +One of Gurdjieffs disciples, Ouspensky, used to say, whenever someone would come to +him to ask about the path, "We don’t know anything about the path. We only teach about +some footpaths which lead to the path. The path is not known to us." Do not think that +you are already on the path. Even the path is far away. From where you are, from that +point, even the path is far away. So first you have to reach to the path. Ouspensky was a +very humble man, and it is very difficult to be religious and to be humble — very, very +difficult, because once you begin to feel that you know, the head goes mad. He would +always say, "We don’t know anything about the path. It is very far away, and there is no +need just now to discuss it." Wherever you are, first you have to create a link, a small +bridge, a footpath which will lead you to the path. + +Spontaneity — SAHAJ YOGA — is very far away from you. + +In the place where you are, you are totally artificial, cultivated and cultured. Nothing is +spontaneous — NOTHING, I say, is spontaneous. When nothing is spontaneous in your +life, how can religion be spontaneous? When nothing is spontaneous, even love is not +spontaneous. Even love is a bargain, even love is a calculation, even love is an effort. +Then nothing can be spontaneous. And then to explode spontaneously into the cosmos is +impossible. + +From the situation you are in, from that situation it is impossible. First you will have to +throw away all your artificiality, all your false attitudes, all your cultivated conventions, +all your prejudices. Only then will a spontaneous happening be possible. These methods +will help you to come to a point from where nothing is needed to be done — just your +being is enough. But mind can deceive. And mind easily deceives, because then it can get +consolation. + +Shiva never talks about any result, just methods. Remember this emphasis. Do +something, so that a moment may be possible when nothing is needed, when your central +being can just dissolve into the cosmos. But that has to be achieved. Zen's appeal is for +the wrong reasons, and the same is true for Krishnamurti, because he says no yoga is +needed, no method is needed. Really, he says there is no method of meditation. He is +right. + +He is right, but Shiva says these one hundred and twelve methods of meditation are there, +and Shiva is also right. + +And as far as YOU are concerned, Shiva is more right. And if you have to choose +between Krishnamurti and Shiva, then choose Shiva. Krishnamurti is of no use to you. +Even this can be said to help you — that Krishnamurti is absolutely wrong. Remember, I + + + +say to help you. And he is harmful. That too I say to help you, because if you get into his +argument you will not achieve samadhi. You will achieve only one conclusion — that no +method is needed. And that is dangerous. For you method is needed! + +There comes a moment when no method is needed, but that moment has not come for you +yet. And before that moment, to know about something that is ahead is dangerous. That is +why Shiva is silent. He will not say anything of the future, of what will happen. He +simply sticks to you, to what you are and what is to be done with you. Krishnamurti goes +on talking in terms which cannot be understood by you. + +The logic can be felt. The logic is right; it is beautiful. It will be good if you can +remember the logic of Krishnamurti. He says that if you are doing some method, then +who is doing that method? The mind is doing it. And how can any method done by mind +dissolve mind? Rather, on the contrary, it will strengthen it more; it will strengthen your +mind more. It will become a conditioning, it will be false. + +So meditation is spontaneous; you cannot do anything about it. What can you do about +love? Can you practice any method for how to love? If you practice, then your love will +be false. + +It happens, it cannot be practiced. If even love cannot be practiced, how can prayer be +practiced? How can meditation be practiced? + +The logic is exactly, absolutely right — but not for you, because by listening to this logic +continuously you will be conditioned by this logic. And those who have been listening to +Krishnamurti for forty years are the most conditioned persons I have come across. They +say there is no method, and still they are nowhere. + +I say, "You have understood there is no method and you do not practice any method, but +has the spontaneity flowered in you?" They say, "No!" + +And if I tell them, "Then practice some method," immediately their conditioning comes +in. They say, "There is no method." + +They have not been practicing any method, and samadhi has not happened. And if you +tell them, "Then try some method," they say there is no method. So they are in a +dilemma. They have not moved an inch, and the reason is that they have been told +something which was not for them. + +It is like teaching a small child about sex. You can go on teaching, but you are saying +something which is as yet meaningless for the child. And your teaching will be dangerous +because you are conditioning his mind. It is not his need; he is not concerned with it. He +doesn't know what sex means because his glands are still not functioning; his body is still +not sexual. + +His energy has not yet moved biologically to the sex center, and you are talking to him. +Because he has ears, do you think that anything can be taught to him? Because he can +nod his head, do you think you can teach him anything? + +You can teach, and your teaching can become dangerous and harmful. Sex is not an +inquiry for him, it has not become a problem for him. He has not reached that point of +maturity where sex becomes significant. Wait! When he begins to inquire, when he +matures and when he asks questions, then tell him. And never tell more than he can +understand, because that more will become a burden on his head. It is the same with the +phenomenon of meditation. + +You can be taught only about methods, not about results — that is taking a jump. And +without getting a foothold on the method, taking the jump is simply a cerebral affair, a + + + +mental affair. And then you will always miss the method. + +It is like small children doing arithmetic. They can always go to the back of the book and +can know the answer. The answer is there; at the back of the book, the answers are given. +They can look at the question, then they can go to the back and know the answer. And +once a child knows the answer it is very difficult for him to leam the method, because +there seems to be no need. When he already knows the answer, there is no need. + +And really, he will do the whole thing in reverse order. + +Then through any false, pseudo method he will arrive at the answer. He knows the real +thing, he knows the answer, so he can arrive at the answer by just creating a false +method. And this happens so much in religion that it seems, as far as religion is +concerned, everyone is just doing what children do. + +The answer is not good for you. The question is there, the method is there, and the +answer must be reached by you. No one else should give you the answer. The real +teachers do not help you to know the answer before the process is done, they simply help +you to go through the process. In fact, even if you have known somehow, even if you +have stolen some answer from somewhere, they will say that this is wrong. It may not be +wrong, but they will say, "This is wrong. Throw this — it is not needed." They will debar +you from knowing the answer before you really come to know it. That is why no answer +is given. + +Shiva's beloved, Devi, has asked him questions. He is giving simple methods. The +question is there, the method is there. The answer is left for you to work out, to live out. +So remember, centering is the method, not the result. The result is cosmic, oceanic +experience. There is no center then. + +The second question: + +Question 2 + +YOU SAID IF ONE CAN REALLY LOVE, THEN LOVE ALONE IS ENOUGH AND +THE ONE HUNDRED AND TWELVE METHODS OF MEDITATION ARE NOT +NEEDED. + +AS YOU HAVE EXPLAINED REAL LOVE, I FEEL REALLY THAT I LOVE, I +BELIEVE. BUT THE BLISS I ENCOUNTER IN MEDITATION FEELS TO BE OF +QUITE ANOTHER DIMENSION THAN THE DEEP CONTENTMENT I +EXPERIENCE FROM LOVE, AND I CANNOT IMAGINE BEING WITHOUT +MEDITATION ALSO. SO EXPLAIN MORE ABOUT HOW LOVE ALONE +WITHOUT MEDITATION CAN BE ENOUGH. + +Many things will have to be understood. One, if you are really in love you will not +inquire at all about meditation — because love is such a total fulfillment that it is never +felt that something is lacking, that some gap is to be filled, that you need something +more. If you feel that something more is needed, the gap is there. If you feel that +something more is to be done and experienced, then love is just a feeling, not a reality. I +do not doubt your belief, you may believe that you are in love. Your belief is authentic; +you are not deceiving anyone. You feel that you are in love, but the symptoms show that +you are not. + +What are the symptoms of being in love? Three things. First, absolute contentment. +Nothing else is needed; not even God is needed. Second, no future. This very moment of +love is eternity. No next moment, no future, no tomorrow. Love is a happening in the +present. And third, you cease to be, you are no more. If you still are, then you have still + + + +not entered the temple of love. + +If these three things happen... If you are not, then who is going to meditate? If there is no +future, then all methods become useless because methods are for the future, for a result. + +And if at this very moment you are content, absolutely content, where is the motivation to +do anything? + +There is a school of psychologists — and this is one of the most significant trends in +modern thinking — that started with Wilhelm Reich. He said that every mental disease +arises because of the lack of love. Because you cannot feel deep love, because you cannot +be in it totally, this unfulfilled being craves for fulfillment in many dimensions. + +When I say that "If you can love, nothing is needed," I do not mean that then love is +enough. I mean that once you love deeply, love becomes a door — just like any +meditation. What is meditation going to do? These three things: It will create +contentment; it will allow you to remain in the present, help you to remain in the present; +and it will destroy your ego. These three things meditation is going to do — with any +method. So you can say it this way: love is the natural method. If the natural method has +been missed, then other artificial methods have to be supplied. + +But one can feel that one is in love; then these three things will become criteria for him. +He will think that these should be made the touchstones, the measures and he will +observe whether these three things are happening. If they are not happening, then his +feeling can be many other things, but not love. And the feeling of love is a great +phenomenon, it can be many things. + +It can be lust; it can be simple sex; it can be just a possessive tendency. It can be just an +occupation because you cannot be alone, and you need someone because you are afraid +and you need security. The presence of the other helps you to be secure. Or it may be just +a sexual relationship. + +Energy needs outlets. Energy goes on accumulating — then it becomes a burden. You +have to throw it and release it. So your love may be just a release. Love can be many +things, and love is many things. And ordinarily, love is many things except LOVE. To +me, love is meditation. So try this: with your lover, be in meditation. Whenever your +lover or beloved is present, be in deep meditation. Make this presence of each other a +meditative state. + +Ordinarily, you are doing the very opposite. Whenever lovers are together they are +fighting. When they are separated then they are thinking of each other, and when they are +together they are fighting. When they are separated again, then again they are thinking +about each other. When they are put together, again the fight starts. This is not love! + +So I will suggest some points. Make the presence of your beloved or lover a meditative +state. Be silent. Remain close, but be silent. Use each other's presence to drop the mind; +do not think. If you are thinking while your lover is with you, then you are not with your +lover. How can you be? You are both there, but miles apart. + +You are thinking your thoughts, your lover is thinking his thoughts. You just appear to be +near, but you are not — because when two minds are thinking, they are poles apart. + +Real love means cessation of thinking. In the presence of your beloved or lover, cease +completely to think; then only are you near. Then suddenly you are one, then bodies +cannot separate you. Then deep down within the body, someone has broken the barrier. +The silence breaks the barrier — that is one thing. + + + +Make your relationship a sacred phenomenon. When you are really in love, the object of +love becomes divine. If it is not, then know well it is not a love relationship; it is +impossible. A love relationship is not a profane relationship. But have you ever felt any +reverence for your beloved? You may have felt many other things, but never reverence. + +It seems inconceivable, but India has tried many, many ways... That is why India has +been insisting that this love relationship between man and woman should be a sacred +phenomenon, not a worldly relationship. The lover, the beloved, they become divine. + +You cannot look at them in any other way. + +I wonder, have you ever felt any reverence for your wife? The very thing seems +irrelevant — reverence for a wife? There is no question. You can feel condemnation, you +can feel everything, but never reverence. The relationship is just worldly; you are using +each other. + +The wife may say that she respects her husband, but I have not seen a single wife who +really respects. Traditionally, because it has been a convention to respect the husband, +the wife goes on saying she respects, and so she will not even utter his name. Not +because of respect, because she can utter anything, but she will not utter his name just +traditionally. + +Reverence is the second thing. In the presence of your beloved or lover, feel reverence. If +you cannot see the divine in your beloved or lover, you cannot see him anywhere else. +How can you see him in a tree, where no relationship exists? When no deep intimacy +prevails, how can you see him in a rock or a tree? They are unrelated. If you cannot see +him in the person you love, if God is not felt there, he cannot be felt anywhere else. And +if he can be felt there, sooner or later you will feel him everywhere — because once the +door is thrown open, once you have a glimpse of the divine in any person, then you +cannot forget that glimpse. And because of that, then everything becomes a door. That is +why I say love itself is a meditation. + +So do not think in contrast — whether to love or to meditate. That was not my meaning. +Do not try to choose whether to love or to meditate. Love meditatively, or meditate +lovingly. Do not create any division. Love is a very natural phenomenon, and it can be +used as a vehicle. And tantra has used it as a vehicle — not only love, even sex tantra has +used as a vehicle. + + +Tantra says that in a deep sex act you can meditate more easily than in any other state of +mind — because this is a natural, biological ecstasy. But whatsoever is known by the sex +act is in a very perverted form. So whenever such things are said you feel uneasy, +because whatsoever you have known in the name of sex is not sex. It is just a shadow, +because the whole society has cultivated your mind against sex. + +Everyone is a suppressed person, so natural sex is impossible. And whenever you are in a +sex act, a deep guilt feeling is always present there. That guilt feeling becomes a barrier, +and one of the greatest opportunities is lost. You could have used it to go deep down into +yourself. + +Tantra says, in the sex act be meditative. Feel the whole phenomenon as holy; do not feel +guilty. Rather, feel blessed that nature has given you one source through which you can +go deep into ecstasy immediately. And then, be totally free in it. Do not repress; do not +resist. Let the sexual communion take hold of you. Forget yourself; throw all your + + + +inhibitions. Be absolutely natural, and then you will feel a deep music in the body. + +When both bodies become one hannony, then you will forget completely that you are — +and still, you will be. Then you will forget the "I": there will be no "I", just existence +playing with existence, one being with another. + +And the two will become one. There will be no thinking; future will cease and you will +be in the present this very moment. Without any guilt, without any inhibition, make it a +meditation, and then sex is transformed. Then sex itself becomes a door. + +If sex becomes a door, by and by sex ceases to be sexual. And a moment comes when sex +has gone — only the perfume has remained. That perfume is love. And later on, even that +perfume disappears, and then that which remains is samadhi. + +Tantra says nothing has to be taken as an enemy. Every energy is friendly; one has just to +know how to use it. So do not make any choice. Transform your love into meditation and +transfonn your meditation into love. Then soon you will forget the word and you will +know the real thing, which is not the word. The word 'love' is not love, and the word +'meditation' is not meditation, and the word 'God' is not God. These are only words. And +if you can penetrate in, then God, meditation, love; they all become one. + +One more question: + +Question 3 + +WHAT ARE THE REASONS FOR MAN’S INSENSITIVITIES AND HOW TO +REMOVE THEM? + +When the child is bom the child is helpless. The human child, particularly, is totally +helpless. He has to depend on others to be alive, to remain alive. This dependence is a +bargain. The child has to give many things in this bargain, and sensitivity is one. + +The child is sensitive; his whole body is sensitive. But he is helpless, he cannot be +independent; he has to depend on parents, on family, on society; he will have to be +dependent. Because of this dependence and helplessness, the parents, the society, go on +forcing things on the child, and he has to yield. Otherwise he cannot remain alive, he will +die. So he has to give many things in this bargain. + +The first very deep and significant thing is sensitivity: he has to leave it. Why? Because +the more the child is sensitive, the more he is in trouble, the more he is vulnerable. A +slight sensation, and he begins to cry. The cry has to be stopped by the parents, and they +cannot do anything. But if the child goes on feeling every detail of sensation, the child +will become a nuisance. And children do become nuisances, so parents have to curtail +their sensitivity. The child has to learn resistance, the child has to learn control. And by +and by the child has to divide his mind into two. So there are many sensations which he +just stops feeling because they are not "good" — he is punished for them. + +The child's whole body is erotic. He can enjoy his fingers, he can enjoy his body; the +whole body is erotic. He goes on exploring his own body; it is a great phenomenon for +him. But the moment comes in his exploration when the child gets to the genitalia. Then +it becomes a problem because the father and mother are all repressed. + +The moment the child, boy or girl, touches the genitalia, the parents become uneasy. This +is to be observed deeply. Their behavior suddenly changes, and the child notes it. +Something wrong has happened. They start crying, "Don't touch!" Then the child starts +feeling that something is wrong with the genitalia, he has to suppress. And the genitals +are the most sensitive part of your body — the most sensitive, the most alive part of your + + + +body, the most delicate. Once the genitalia are not allowed to be touched and enjoyed, +you have killed the very source of sensitivity. Then the child will become insensitive. + +The more he will grow, the more he will be insensitive. + +So first there is a bargain — necessary, but evil. And the moment one begins to +understand, this bargain has to be thrown and you have to regain your sensitivity. The +second reason for this bargain is because of security. + +I was with a friend for many years; I lived in his bungalow. From the very first day I +observed that he would not look at his servants. He was a rich man, but he would never +look at his servants, he would never look at his children. He would come running into the +bungalow, then he would go running from his bungalow to his car. So I asked him, "What +is the matter?" + +He said, "If you look at your servants they start feeling friendly, and then they start +asking about money and this and that. + +If you talk with your children, then you are not the master, then you cannot control +them." So he created a facade of insensitivity around himself. He was afraid that if he +talked with a servant, if he should feel that the servant was ill, if he sympathized, then he +would have to give some money or some help. + +Everyone learns sooner or later that to be sensitive is to be vulnerable to many things. + +You pull yourself in, you create a barrier around yourself that is a safeguard — a safety +measure. Then you can go on through the streets... beggars are begging and there are +dirty, ugly slums, but you do not feel anything, you do not really see. In this ugly society +one has to create a barrier around himself, a wall — a subtle, transparent wall — behind +which he can hide. Otherwise, one is vulnerable, and it will be very difficult to live. + +That is why insensitivity sets in. It helps you to be in this ugly world without being +disturbed; but there is a cost — and the cost is very much. You are at ease in this world +without being disturbed, but then you cannot enter into the divine, into the total, into the +whole. You cannot enter the other world. If for this world insensitivity is good and for +that world sensitivity is good, that creates the problem. + +If you are really interested in entering that world, you will have to create sensitivity, you +will have to throw away all these walls, these securities. + +Of course, you will become vulnerable. You will feel much suffering, but that suffering is +nothing in comparison to the bliss you can reach through sensitivity. The more sensitive +you become, the more you will feel compassion. But you will suffer because all around +you there is hell. You are closed — that is why you cannot feel it. Once you become open, +you will be open to both — to the hell of this world and the heaven of that world. You +will become open to both. + +And it is impossible to remain closed at one point and open at another, because really, +either you are closed or you are open. If you are closed, you are closed for both. If you +are open, you will be open for both. So remember this: a buddha is filled with bliss, but +also filled with suffering. + +That suffering is not of his own, it is for others. He is in deep bliss, but he suffers for +others. And Mahayana Buddhists say that when Buddha reached to the door of nirvana, +the gatekeeper opened the door — this is a myth, and very beautiful — the doorkeeper +opened the door, but Buddha refused to enter. The doorkeeper said, "Why are you not +coming in? For millennia we have been waiting for you. Every day the news comes that +'Buddha is coming, Buddha is coming!’ The whole of heaven is waiting for you. Enter! + + + +You are welcome!" + +Buddha said, "I cannot enter unless everyone else has entered before me. + +I will wait! Unless every single human being has entered, heaven is not for me." + +Buddha has a suffering for others. As for himself, he is now deep in bliss. See the +parallel? You are deep in suffering, and you go on feeling that everyone else is enjoying +life. Quite the contrary happens to a Buddha. He is now in deep bliss, and he knows that +everyone else is suffering. + +These methods are the methods to remove this insensitivity. We will discuss more about +HOW to remove it. + +Enough. + +THE END. + + + +Chapter 15: Toward the untouched inner reality + + +22. LET ATTENTION BE AT A PLACE WHERE YOU ARE SEEING SOME PAST +HAPPENING, AND EVEN YOUR FORM, HAVING LOST ITS PRESENT +CHARACTERISTICS, IS TRANSFORMED. + +23. FEEL AN OBJECT BEFORE YOU. FEEL THE ABSENCE OF ALL OTHER +OBJECTS BUT THIS ONE. THEN, LEAVING ASIDE THE OBJECT-FEELING AND +THE ABSENCE-FEELING, REALIZE. + +24. WHEN A MOOD AGAINST SOMEONE OR FOR SOMEONE ARISES, DO NOT +PLACE IT ON THE PERSON IN QUESTION, BUT REMAIN CENTERED. + +One of the great tantrics of this age, George Gurdjieff, says that identification is the only +sin. The next sutra, the tenth sutra on centering — which we are going to penetrate tonight +— is concerned with identification. So first be crystal clear on what identification means. +You were a child once; now you are not. Someone becomes young, someone becomes +old, and childhood becomes a past thing. Youth has gone, but still you are identified with +your childhood. You cannot see it as happening to someone else; you cannot be a witness +to it. Whenever you see your childhood, you are not aloof from it, you are one with it. +Whenever someone remembers his youth, he is one with it. + +Really, now it is just a dream. And if you can see your childhood as a dream, as a film +passing before you and you are not identified with it, you are just a witness, you will +achieve a very subtle insight into yourself. If you see your past as a film, as a dream — +you are not part of it, you are just out of it. + +.. and really you are — then many things will happen. If you are thinking about your +childhood, you are not in it — you cannot be. The childhood is just a memory, just a past +memory. You are remaining aloof and looking at it. You are different: you are a witness. +If you can feel this witnessing and then see your childhood as a film on a screen, many +things will happen. + +One: if childhood has become just a dream which you can see, then whatsoever you are +just now will become a dream the next day. If you are young, then your youth will +become a dream. If you are old, then your old age also will become a dream. One day +you were a child; now the childhood has become just a dream and you can observe it. + +It is good to start with the past. Observe the past and disidentify yourself from it; become +a witness. Then observe the future, whatsoever you imagine about the future, and be a +witness to that also. Then you can observe your present very easily, because then you +know that whatsoever is present just now was future yesterday, and tomorrow it will +become the past. But your witness is never past, never future. Your witnessing +consciousness is eternal; it is not part of time. That is why everything that happens in +time becomes a dream. + +Remember this also: whenever you are dreaming something in the night you become +identified with it, and you can never remember in your dream that this is a dream. + +Only in the morning, when you have awakened from the dream, can you remember that it +was a dream and not a reality. Why? Because then you are aloof, not in it. Then there is a +gap. Some space is there, and you can see that it was a dream. + +But what is your whole past? The gap is there, the space is there. Try to see it as a dream. + + + +Now it is a dream; now it is nothing more than a dream, because just as the dream +becomes a memory, your past has become just a memory. You cannot prove really that +whatsoever you think was your childhood was real or just a dream. It is difficult to prove. +It may have been just a dream, it may have been real. The memory cannot say whether it +was real or a dream. Psychologists say that old men occasionally get confused between +what they have dreamed and what was real. + +Children always get confused. In the morning, small children cannot differentiate. +Whatsoever they have seen in the dream was not real, but they may weep for a toy +destroyed in the dream. And you also, for a few moments after sleep is broken, are still +affected by your dream. If someone was murdering you in the dream, even though your +sleep is broken and you are wide awake, your heart still beats fast, your blood circulation +is fast. You may be still perspiring, and a subtle fear is still there hovering around you. +Now you are awake and the dream has passed, but you will take a few minutes to feel +that it was simply a dream and nothing else. + +When you can feel that it was a dream, then you are out of it and there is no fear. + +If you can feel that the past was just a dream — you are not to project this and force the +idea that the past was just a dream, it is a consequence — if you can observe this; if you +can be aware of it without getting involved in it, without being identified with it; if you +can stand aloof and look at it, it will become a dream. Anything that you can look at as a +witness is a dream. + +That is why Shankara and Nagarjuna could say that this world is just a dream. Not that it +IS a dream; they were not fools, not simpletons saying this world actually is a dream. +They meant by saying this that they have become witnesses. Even to this world which is +so actual, they have become witnesses. And once you become a witness of anything, it +becomes a dream. That is the reason why the world is called MAYA, an illusion. It is not +that it is unreal, but that one can become a witness to it. And once you become a witness +— aware, fully aware — the whole thing drops just like a dream for you, because the space +is there and you are not identified with it. But we go on being identified. + +Just a few days before I was reading Jean Jacques Rousseau's CONFESSIONS. This is a +rare book. It is really the first book in world literature in which someone bares himself, +totally naked. Whatsoever sins he has committed, whatsoever immorality, he opens +himself up, totally naked. + +But if you read the CONFESSIONS of Rousseau you are bound to feel that he is +enjoying it; he feels very much elated. Talking about his sins, talking about his +immoralities, he feels elated. It seems as if he is enjoying it with much relish. In the +beginning, in the introduction, Rousseau says, "When the last day of judgement will +come, I will say to God, to the almighty, 'You need not bother about me. Read this book +and you will know everything.’" + +No one before him has ever confessed so truthfully. And at the end of the book he says, +"Almighty God, eternal God, fulfill my only desire. I have confessed everything; now let +a big crowd gather to listen to my confessions." + +So it is rightly suspected that he may have confessed some sins also which he has not +committed. He feels so elated and he is enjoying the whole thing. He has become +identified. And there is only one sin which he has not admitted to — the sin of being +identified. With whatsoever sin he has committed or not committed he is identified, and +that is the only sin for those who know deeply how the human mind functions. + + + +When for the first time he read his confessions amongst a small group of intellectuals, he +was thinking that something earthshaking would happen, because he was the first man to +confess so truthfully, as he said. The intellectuals listened, and they became more and +more bored. + +Rousseau felt very uneasy because he was thinking something miraculous was going to +happen. When he ended, they all felt relieved, but no one said anything. There was +complete silence for a few moments. Rousseau's heart was shattered. He was thinking +that he had created a very revolutionary thing, earthshaking, historical, and there was +simply silence. Everyone was just thinking about how to get away from there. + +Who is interested in your sins except yourself? No one is interested in your virtues, no +one is interested in your sins. Man is such that he becomes elated, he becomes +strengthened in his ego, by his virtues and by his sins also. After writing +CONFESSIONS, Rousseau began to think himself a sage, a saint, because he had +confessed. But the basic sin remained. The basic sin is being identified with happenings +in time. Whatsoever happens in time is dreamlike, and unless you get unattached from it, +not identified with it, you will never know what bliss is. + +Identification is misery; non-identification is bliss. This tenth technique is concerned +with identification. + +The tenth sutra: + +LET ATTENTION BE AT A PLACE WHERE YOU ARE SEEING SOME PAST +HAPPENING, AND EVEN YOUR FORM, HAVING LOST ITS PRESENT +CHARACTERISTICS, IS TRANSFORMED. + +You are remembering your past — any happening. Your childhood, your love affairs, the +death of your father or mother. + +.. anything. Look at it, but do not get involved in it. Remember it as if you are +remembering someone else's life. And when this happening is being filmed again, is on +the screen again, be attentive, aware, a witness, remaining aloof. Your past form will be +there in the film, in the story. + +If you are remembering your love affair, your first love affair, you will be there with your +beloved; your past fonn will be there with your beloved. You cannot remember +otherwise. Be detached from your past form also. Look at the whole phenomenon as if +someone else were loving someone else, as if the whole thing doesn’t belong to you. You +are just a witness, an observer. + +This is a very, very basic technique. It has been used much, particularly by Buddha. + +There are many forms of this technique; you can find your own way of approaching this. +For example, when you are just falling into sleep at night, just ready to fall into sleep, go +backwards through the memories of the whole day. Do not start from the morning. Start +right from where you are, just on the bed — the last item — and then go back. Then go +back by and by, step by step, just to the first experience in the morning when you first +became awake. Go back, and remember continuously that you are not getting involved. +For example, in the afternoon someone insulted you. See yourself, the form of yourself, +being insulted by someone, but you remain just an observer. + +Do not get involved; do not get angry again. If you get angry again, then you are +identified. Then you have missed the point of meditation. Do not get angry. He is not + + + +insulting you, he is insulting the form that was in the afternoon. That form has gone now. +You are just like a river flowing: the forms are flowing. In your childhood you had one +form, and now you do not have that fonn; that fonn has gone. River-like, you are +changing continuously. So when in the night you are meditating backwards on the +happenings of the day, just remember that you are a witness — do not get angry. Someone +was praising you — do not get elated. Just look at the whole thing as if you are looking +indifferently at a film. And backwards it is very helpful, particularly for those who have +any trouble with sleep. + +If you have any trouble with sleep, insomnia, sleeplessness, if you find it difficult to fall +into sleep, this will help deeply. Why? Because this is an unwinding of the mind. When +you go back you are unwinding the mind. In the morning you start winding, and the mind +becomes tangled in many things, in many places. Unfinished and incomplete, many +things will remain on the mind, and there is no time to let them settle at the very moment +that they happen. + +So in the night go back. This is an unwinding process. And when you will be getting +back to the morning when you were just on your bed, to the first thing in the morning, +you will again have the same fresh mind that you had in the morning. + +And then you can fall asleep like a very small child. + +You can use this technique of going back for your whole life also. Mahavir used this +technique of going back very much. And now there is a movement in America called +dianetics. They are using this method and finding it very, very useful. This movement, +dianetics, says that all your diseases are just hangovers of the past. And they are right. If +you can go backwards and unwind your whole life, with that unwinding many diseases +will disappear completely. And this has been proven by so many successful incidents; +there are so many successful cases now. + +So many persons suffer from a particular disease, and nothing physiological, nothing +medical helps; the disease continues. The disease seems to be psychological. What to do +about it? To say to someone that his disease is psychological is no help. Rather, it may +prove harmful, because no one feels good when you say his disease is psychological. +What can he do then? He feels he is helpless. + +This going backwards is a miraculous method. If you go back slowly — slowly unwinding +the mind to the first moment when this disease happened — if by and by you go back to +when for the first time you were attacked by this disease, if you can unwind to that +moment, you will come to know that this disease is basically a complex of certain other +things, certain psychological things. + +By going back those things will bubble up. + +If you pass through that moment when the disease first attacked you, suddenly you will +become aware of what psychological factors contributed to it. And you are not to do +anything, you are just to be aware of those psychological factors and go on backwards. +Many diseases simply disappear from you because the complex is broken. When you +have become aware of the complex, then there is no need of it; you are cleaned of it, +purged. + +This is a deep catharsis. And if you can do it daily, you will feel a new health, a new +freshness coming to you. And if we can teach children to do it daily, they will never be +burdened by their past. They will not need ever to go to the past, they will be always here +and now. There won’t be any hang-up; nothing will be hovering over them from the past. + + + +You can do it daily. It will give you a new insight for going backward through the whole +day. The mind would like to start from the morning, but remember, then there is no +unwinding. Rather, the whole thing is re-emphasized. If you start from the morning, you +are doing a very wrong thing. + +There are many so-called teachers in India who suggest to do it — to reflect on the whole +day — and they always say to do it again from the morning. That is wrong and harmful, +because then you are re-emphasizing the whole thing and the trap will be deepened. + +Never go from the morning to the evening, always go backward. Only then can you clean +the whole thing, purge the whole thing. The mind would like to start from the morning +because it is easy: the mind knows it and there is no problem. If you start going +backward, suddenly you will feel you have jumped into the morning and you have started +going forward again. Do not do that — be aware, go back. + +You can train your mind to go back through other things also. Just go back from a +hundred — 99, 98, 97... go back. Go from a hundred to one, backwards. You will feel a +difficulty because the mind has a habit to go from one to hundred, never from a hundred +to one. + +In the same way you have to go backward with this technique. What will happen? Going +backward, unwinding the mind, you are a witness. You are seeing things that happened to +you, but now they are not happening to you. Now you are just an observer and they are +happening on the screen of the mind. + +While doing this daily, suddenly one day you will become aware during the day, while +working in the market, in your office or anywhere, that you can be a witness to events +that are happening just now. If you can be a witness later on, and look back at someone +who had insulted you without becoming angry about it, why not right now, to what is +presently happening? + +Someone is insulting you: what is the difficulty? You can pull yourself aside just now +and you can see that someone is insulting you, and still you are different from your body, +from your mind, from that which is insulted. + +You can witness it. If you can be a witness to this, you will not get angry; then it is +impossible. Anger is possible only when you are identified. If you are not identified, +anger is impossible — anger means identification. + +This technique says, look at any happening of the past — your form will be there. The +sutra says your form, not you. You were never there. Always your form is involved; you +are never involved. When you insult me, you do not insult ME. You cannot insult me, +you can insult only the form. The form which I am is there just here and now for you. + +You can insult that form and I can detach myself from the form. That is why Hindus have +always been insisting on being detached from name and form. Y ou are neither your name +nor your fonn. You are the consciousness who knows the form and the name, and the +consciousness is different, totally different. + +But it is difficult. So start with the past, then it is easy, because now, with the past there is +no urgency. Someone insulted you twenty years back, so there is no urgency in it. The +man may have died and everything is finished. It is just a dead affair, just dead from the +past; it is easy to be aware of it. But once you can become aware there is no difficulty in +doing the same with what is happening just here and now. + +But to start from here and now is difficult. The problem is so urgent and it is so near that +there is no space to move. + + + +It is difficult to create space and move away from the incident. That is why the sutra says +to start with the past: look at your own form, detached, standing aloof and different, and +be transformed through it. + +You will be transformed through it because it is a deep cleaning, an unwinding. Then you +can know that your body, your mind, your existence in time are not your basic reality. + +The substantial reality is different. Things come and go upon it without touching it in the +least. You remain innocent, untouched; you remain virgin. The whole thing passes, the +whole life passes: good and bad, success and failure, praise and blame — everything +passes. Disease and health, youth and old age, birth and death — everything passes, and +you are untouched by it. + +But how to know this untouched reality within you? That is the purpose of this technique. +Start with the past. There is a gap when you look at your past; the perspective is possible. +Or look at the future. But to look at the future is difficult. Only for a few persons is +observing the future not difficult — for poets, for people with imagination who can look +into the future as if they are looking at reality. But ordinarily the past is good to use; you +can look into the past. For young men it may be good to look into the future. It is easier +for them to look into the future because youth is future-oriented. + +For old men there is no future except death. + +They cannot look into the future; they are afraid. That is why old men always start +thinking about the past. They always go again and again into their memories, but they +commit the same mistake. They start from the past toward their present state of being — +that is wrong, they should go backward. + +If they can go backward many times, by and by they will feel that their whole past is +washed away from them. And then a person can die without the past clinging to him. If +you can die without the past clinging to you, you will die consciously; you will die fully +aware. Then death will not be a death to you. Rather, it will be a meeting with the +deathless. + +Clean the whole consciousness of the depth of the past, and your very being will be +transfonned through it. Try this. This method is not very difficult, only persistent effort is +needed; there is no inherent difficulty in the method. It is simple, and you can start with +your day. Just tonight on your bed go backward, and you will feel very beautiful, you +will feel very blissful. And then the whole day will have passed. But do not be in a hurry, +pass it slowly so that nothing is missed. It is a very strange feeling, because many things +will come up before your eyes. Many things you have really missed while passing +through the day because you were too much engaged. But the mind goes on collecting +even when you are unaware. + + +You were passing through a street. Someone was singing, but you might not have paid +any attention. You might not have even been aware that you have heard the sound, just +passing in the street. But the mind has heard and recorded it. Now that will cling; that +will become a burden to you unnecessarily. So go back, but go very slowly, as if a film is +being shown to you in very slow motion. Go back and see the details, and then your one +day will look very, very long. It is, really, because for the mind there has been so much +information, and the mind has recorded everything. Now go back. + +By and by you will become capable of knowing everything that has been recorded. And +once you can go back, it is just like a tape recorder: it is washed away. By the time you + + + +will reach the morning you will fall asleep, and the quality of the sleep will be different — +it will be meditative. Then again, in the morning when you feel that you have awakened, +do not open your eyes immediately. Go backward into the night. + +It will be difficult in the beginning. You may go a little. Some part, some fragment of a +dream which you were just dreaming before the sleep was broken may come to your +mind. But by and by, with gradual effort, you will be able to penetrate more and more +and more, and after a three-month period you will be capable of moving backward to the +point when you fell asleep. + +And if you can go backward deep within your sleep, your quality of sleep and waking +will change completely, because then you cannot dream; dreaming will have become +futile. If you can go back in the day and in the night, dreaming is not needed. + +Now psychologists say that dreaming is really an unwinding. If you yourself have done +it, then there is no need. All that has been hanging in the mind, all that has remained +unfulfilled, incomplete, tries to complete itself in the dream. + +You were passing and you have seen something — a beautiful house — and a subtle desire +arose in you to possess it. But you were going to your office and that was no time for +daydreaming, so you just passed by. You did not even notice that the mind had created a +desire to possess this house. But now that desire is hanging there, suspended, and if it +cannot be removed it will be difficult to sleep. + +Difficulties in sleep basically mean only one thing, that your day is still hanging over you +and you cannot be relieved of it. You are clinging to it. Then in the night you will see a +dream that you have become the owner of this house — now you are living in this house. +The moment this dream comes to you, your mind is relieved. + +So ordinarily people think that dreams are disturbances to sleep — that is absolutely +wrong. Dreams are not disturbances to your sleep. They are not disturbing your sleep, +they are really helping; without them you could not sleep at all. + +As you are you cannot sleep without dreams, because your dreams are helping to +complete things which have remained incomplete. + +And there are things which cannot be completed. Your mind goes on desiring absurd +desires, and they cannot be completed in reality, so what to do? Those incomplete desires +go on in you, and they keep you hoping, they keep you thinking. So what to do? You +have seen a beautiful woman and you were attracted to her. Now the desire has arisen to +possess her. It may not be possible, the woman may not even look at you. So what to do? +The dream will help you. + +In a dream you can possess the woman, and then the mind is relieved. As far as the mind +is concerned, there is no difference between dream and reality. What is the difference? +Loving a woman in reality and loving a woman in a dream, what is the difference for the +mind? There is no difference. Or this may be the difference, that the dream phenomenon +may be more beautiful, because then the woman will not disturb you. It is your dream +and you can do anything, and the woman will not create any problems for you. The other +is absent completely, you are alone. There is no barrier, so you can do whatsoever you +like. + +There is no difference for the mind; mind cannot make any distinction between what is +dream and what is reality. For example, if you could be put in a coma for one whole year, +and you dream on and on, for one year you will not be able to feel in any way that +whatsoever you are seeing is a dream. + + + +It will be real, and the dream will continue for one year. + +Psychologists say that if you can put a man in a coma for a hundred years he will dream +for a hundred years, not for a single moment suspecting that whatsoever he is doing is +just a dream. And if he dies he will never know that his life was just a dream, that it was +never real. For the mind there is no difference: reality and dream are both the same. So +mind can unwind itself in dream. + +If you do this technique, then there will be no need for dreams. The quality of your sleep +will be changed totally, because without dreams you fall to the very bottom of your +being, and without dreams you will be aware in your sleep. + +That is what Krishna says in the Gita, that while everyone is deeply asleep the yogi is +not, the yogi is awake. That doesn’t mean that the yogi is not sleeping — he is also +sleeping, but the quality of the sleep is different. Your sleep is just like a drugged +unconsciousness. A yogi's sleep is a deep relaxation with no unconsciousness. His whole +body is relaxed; every fiber and cell of his whole body is relaxed, with no tension left. + +But he is fully aware of the whole phenomenon. + +Try this technique. Start from tonight, try it, and then do it in the morning also. And +when you feel that you are attuned to the technique, that you can do it, after one week try +it for your whole past. + +Just take one day off. Go to some lonely place. It will be good if you fast — fast and be +silent. Lie down on some lonely beach or under some tree, and just move toward your +past from this point: you are lying on the beach feeling the sand and the sun, and now +move backward. Go on penetrating, penetrating, penetrating, and find out the last thing +that you can remember. + +You will be surprised. Ordinarily you cannot remember much, and you cannot pass the +barrier of four or five years of age. Those who have a very good memory may go back to +the age barrier of three years, but then suddenly a block comes and everything goes dark. +But if you try with this technique, by and by you will break the barrier, and very easily +you can come to remember the first day you were born. And that is a revelation. + +Back again with your sun and beach, you will be a different man. If you make more +effort, you can penetrate to the womb. And you have memories of the womb — nine +months of memories with your mother. That nine-month period is also recorded in the +mind. When your mother was depressed, you have recorded it because you felt +depressed. You were so connected with the mother, so united, so one, that whatsoever +happened to your mother was happening to you. When she was angry, you were angry. +When she was happy, you were happy. When she was praised, you felt praised. When she +was ill, you felt the pain, the suffering, everything. + + +If you can penetrate to the womb, now you are on the right track. And then, by and by, +you can penetrate more and you can remember the first moment when you entered the +womb. + +Only because of this remembrance, Mahavir and Buddha could say that there are past +lives, rebirth. Rebirth is not really a principle, it is just a deep psychological experience. +And if you can remember the first moment you entered the womb of your mother, then +you can penetrate more and you can remember the death of your past life. Once you +touch that point then the method is in your hands; then you can move very easily to all +your past lives. + + + +This is an experience, and the result is phenomenal, because then you know that through +many, many lives you have lived the same nonsense that you are living now. You have +been doing this whole nonsense so many times, repeatedly. The pattern is the same, the +format is the same, only the details differ. You loved some other woman, now you love +this woman. You gathered money... the coins were of one kind, now the coins are +different. But the whole pattern is the same; it is repetitive. + +Once you can see that for many, many lives you have lived the same nonsense, how +stupid has been this whole vicious circle, suddenly you are awakened and the whole thing +becomes a dream. You are thrown away from it, and now you do not want to repeat the +same thing in the future. + + +Desire stops, because desire is nothing but the past being projected into the future. Desire +is nothing but your past experience in search of another repetition again. Desire means +just an old experience that you want to repeat again — nothing else. And you cannot leave +desire unless you become aware of this whole phenomenon. How can you leave it? The +past is there as a great barrier, a rock-like barrier. It is upon your head; it is pushing you +toward the future. Desires are created by the past and projected into the future. If you can +know the past as a dream, all desires become impotent. They fall down, they just wither +away — and the future disappears. In that disappearance of past and future, you are +transfonned. + +The eleventh technique: + +FEEL AN OBJECT BEFORE YOU. FEEL THE ABSENCE OF ALL OTHER +OBJECTS BUT THIS ONE. THEN LEAVING ASIDE THE OBJECT-FEELING AND +THE ABSENCE-FEELING, REALIZE. + +FEEL AN OBJECT BEFORE YOU — any object. For example, a roseflower. Anything +will do. FEEL AN OBJECT BEFORE YOU. First, feel it. Seeing won’t do — feel it. You +see a roseflower, but your heart is not stilled, you are not feeling it; otherwise you may +start weeping and crying, otherwise you may start laughing and dancing. You are not +feeling it, you are just seeing it. And even that seeing may not be complete, because you +never see completely. The past, the memory, says that this is a rose, and you pass on. + +You have not seen it really. The mind says that this is a rose. You know everything about +it, as you have known roses before, so what about this one? So you pass on. Just a +glimpse is enough to revive the memory of your past experience of roses, and you pass +on. Even seeing is not complete. + +Remain with the rose. See it, then feel it. What to do to feel it? Smell it, touch it, let it +become a deep bodily experience. First close your eyes and let the rose touch your whole +face. Feel it. Put it on the eyes, let the eyes touch it; smell it. Put it against the heart, be +silent with it; give a feeling to the rose. Forget everything, forget the whole world. FEEL +AN OBJECT BEFORE YOU AND FEEL THE ABSENCE OF ALL OTHER OBJECTS, +because if your mind is still thinking of other things then this feeling will not penetrate +deeply. Forget all other roses, forget all other persons, forget everything. Just let this rose +remain there. Only the rose, the rose, the rose! Forget everything else, let this rose +envelope you completely... you are drowned in the rose. + +This will be difficult because we are not so sensitive. But for women it will not be so +difficult; they can feel it more easily. For men it may be a little bit more difficult, unless + + + +they have a very developed aesthetic sense, like a poet or a painter or a musician — they +can feel things. But try. Children can do it very easily. + + +I was teaching this method to the son of one of my friends. He could feel very easily. +When I gave him a roseflower and I told him all that I have told to you, he did it, and he +enjoyed it deeply. And then I asked him, "How are you feeling?" He said, "I have become +a roseflower — that is the feeling. I have become a roseflower." Children can do it very +easily, but we never train them; otherwise they could be the best meditators. + +Forget all other objects completely. FEEL THE ABSENCE OF ALL OTHER OBJECTS +BUT THIS ONE. This is what happens in love. If you are in love with someone, you +forget the whole world. If you are still remembering the world, then know well that this is +not love. You have forgotten the whole world; only the beloved or the lover remains. + +That is why I say love is a meditation. You can use this technique also as a love +technique; forget everything else. + +Just a few days ago a friend came to me with his wife. His wife was complaining about a +certain thing; that is why she had come. The friend said, "I have been meditating for a +year and now I am deep in it. And while I meditate I have found it helpful when a peak +comes to my meditation to suddenly cry, 'Rajneesh, Rajneesh, Rajneesh!’ It helps me, but +now a strange thing has happened. When I am making love to my wife, when I come to a +sexual peak, I start crying, 'Rajneesh, Rajneesh, Rajneesh!’ Because of this my wife is +very much disturbed, and she says, 'Are you making love with me, are you meditating, or +what are you doing? And why does this "Rajneesh" come in?’" + +The man said to me, "It is now very difficult because if I do not cry, 'Rajneesh, + +Rajneesh!’ I cannot achieve a peak. + +And if I cry, my wife is very much disturbed. She starts crying and weeping and making +a scene. So what to do? Thus, I have brought my wife." Of course, his wife's complaint is +right, because she does not like for someone else to be present between them. That is why +love needs privacy — absolute privacy. The privacy is meaningful, just to forget all else. + +In Europe and America, now they are working with group sex. That is nonsense — many +couples making love in one room. It is absolute nonsense because then love can never go +very deep. It will become just a sex orgy. The presence of others becomes a barrier; then +it cannot be meditative. + +With any object, if you can forget the whole world you are in a deep love — with a rose or +with a stone or with anything. But the condition is to feel the presence of this object and +feel the absence of all else. Let this object be the only existential thing in your +consciousness. It will be easy if you try with some object you are naturally in love with. + +It would be difficult for you to put a stone, a rock, before you and forget the whole world. +It would be difficult, but Zen masters have done it. They have rock gardens for +meditation. No flowers, no trees, nothing — just rocks and sand. And they meditate on a +rock because, they say, if you can have a deep love relationship with a rock, then no man +can create a barrier for you. + +And men are like rocks. If you can love a rock, then you can love a man, then there is no +problem. Men are like rocks — even more stony. It is difficult to break them and penetrate +them. + +But choose some object you naturally love, and then forget the whole world. Relish the + + + +presence, taste the presence, feel it, go deep into it and let it go deep into you. THEN, +LEAVING ASIDE THE OBJECT... And then comes the most difficult part of this +technique. You have left all other objects, and only one object has remained. You have +forgotten all, only one has remained. + +Now, LEAVING ASIDE THE OBJECT-FEELING... Now leave aside the feeling that +you have for this object. LEAVING ASIDE THE OBJECT-FEELING AND THE +ABSENCE-FEELING — of other objects. Now there are only two things; everything else +is absent. Now leave that absence also. Only this rose, this face, this woman, this man, +this rock, is present. Leave this also, and leave the feeling as well. Suddenly you fall into +an absolute vacuum and nothing remains. And Shiva says, REALIZE. Realize this +vacuum, this nothingness. This is your nature, this is pure being. + +It will be difficult to approach nothingness directly — very difficult and arduous. So it is +easy to pass through one object as a vehicle. First put one object in the mind, and feel it +so totally that you need not remember anything else. Your whole consciousness is filled +with this one object. + +Then leave this also, forget this also. + +You fall into an abyss. Now nothing remains, no object. Only your subjectivity is there — +pure, uncontaminated, unoccupied. This pure being, this pure consciousness, is your +nature. But do it in steps; do not try the whole technique at once. First create an object- +feeling. For a few days only do this part, do not do the whole technique. + +First, for a few days or for a few weeks, just do one part — the first part. Create an object- +feeling; be filled with the object. And use one object, do not go on changing objects, +because with every object you will have to make the same effort again. If you have +chosen one roseflower, then go on using that roseflower every day. Be filled with it so +that one day you can say, "Now I am the flower." Then the first part is fulfilled. When +only the flower is there and all else is forgotten, then relish this idea for a few days. It is +beautiful in itself — very, very beautiful, vital, powerful in itself. + +Just feel it for a few days. And then, when you are attuned to it and it has become easy, +then you need not struggle. Then the flower comes there suddenly, the whole world is +forgotten and only the flower remains. + +Then try the second part: close your eyes and forget the flower also. If you have done the +first, the second will not be difficult — remember. But if you try the whole technique in +one sitting, the second will be impossible — because if you can do the first, if you can +forget the whole world for one flower, you can forget the flower also for nothingness. + +So the second part will come, but first you have to struggle for it. But the mind is very +tricky. The mind will always say to try the whole thing, and then you will not succeed. +Then the mind will say, "It is not useful," or, "It is not for me." Try it in parts if you want +to succeed. Let the first part be complete, and then do the second. Then the object is not +there and only your consciousness remains, just like a light, a flame without anything +around it. + +You have a lamp and the lamp’s light falls on many objects. Visualize it. In your room +there are many, many objects. If you bring one lamp into the darkness of the room, all the +objects are lighted. The lamp radiates light on every object so that you can see them. + +Now remain with an object; let there be one object. The lamp is the same, but now only +one object is there in its light. Now remove that object also: now light remains without +any object. + + + +The same happens with your consciousness. You are a flame, a light; the whole world is +your object. You leave the whole world, and you choose one object for your +concentration. Your flame remains the same, but now it is not occupied with multi- +objects, it is occupied with only one. And then drop that object also. Suddenly there is +simply light — consciousness. It is not falling on anything. This Buddha has called +NIRVANA; this Mahavir has called KAIVALYA — the total aloneness. + +The Upanishads have called it the experience of the BRAHMAN, or the ATMAN. Shiva +says that if you can do this single technique, you will realize the supreme. + +The twelfth technique: + +WHEN A MOOD AGAINST SOMEONE OR FOR SOMEONE ARISES, DO NOT +PLACE IT ON THE PERSON IN QUESTION, BUT REMAIN CENTERED. + +If hate arises for someone or against someone, or love arises for someone, what do we +do? We project it on the person. If you feel hate toward me, you forget yourself +completely in your hate; only I become your object. If you feel love toward me, you +forget yourself completely; only I become the object. You project your love or hate or +whatsoever upon me. You forget completely the inner center of your being; the other +becomes the center. This sutra says when hate arises or love arises, or any mood for or +against anyone, do not project it on the person in question. Remember, you are the source +of it. + +I love you — the ordinary feeling is that you are the source of my love. That is not really +so. I am the source, you are just a screen on which I project my love. You are just a +screen; I project my love on you and I say that you are the source of my love. This is not +fact, this is fiction. I draw my love energy and project it onto you. In that love energy +projected onto you, you become lovely. You may not be lovely to someone else, you may +be absolutely repulsive to someone else. + +Why? If you are the source of love then everyone will feel loving toward you, but you are +not the source. I project love, then you become lovely; someone projects hate, then you +become repulsive. And someone else doesn’t project anything, he is indifferent; he may +not even have looked at you. What is happening? We are projecting our own moods upon +others. + +That is why, if you are on your honeymoon, the moon looks beautiful, miraculous, +wonderful. It seems that the whole world is different. And on the same night, just for +your neighbor, this miraculous night may not be in existence at all. His child has died — +then the same moon is just sad, intolerable. But for you it is enchanting, fascinating; it is +maddening. Why? Is the moon the source or is the moon just a screen and you are +projecting yourself? + +This sutra says, WHEN A MOOD AGAINST SOMEONE OR FOR SOMEONE +ARISES, DO NOT PLACE IT ON THE PERSON IN QUESTION - or on the object in +question. Remain centered. Remember that you are the source, so do not move to the +other, move to the source. When you feel hate, do not go to the object. Go to the point +from where the hate is coming. Go not to the person to whom it is going, but to the center +from where it is coming. Move to the center, go within. Use your hate or love or anger or +anything as a journey toward your inner center, to the source. Move to the source and +remain centered there. + + + +Try it! This is a very, very scientific, psychological technique. Someone has insulted you +— anger suddenly erupts, you are feverish. Anger is flowing toward the person who has +insulted you. Now you will project this whole anger onto him. He has not done anything. +If he has insulted you, what has he done? He has just pricked you, he has helped your +anger to arise — but the anger is yours. If he goes to Buddha and insults him, he will not +be able to create any anger in him. Or if he goes to Jesus, Jesus will give him the other +cheek. Or if he goes to Bodhidharma, he will roar with laughter. So it depends. + +The other is not the source, the source is always within you. The other is hitting the +source, but if there is no anger within you it cannot come out. If you hit a buddha, only +compassion will come out because only compassion is there. Anger will not come out +because anger is not there. If you throw a bucket into a dry well, nothing comes out. In a +water-fdled well, you throw a bucket and water comes out, but the water is from the well. +The bucket only helps to bring it out. So one who is insulting you is just throwing a +bucket in you, and then the bucket will come out filled with the anger, hate, or fire that +was within you. Y ou are the source, remember. + +For this technique, remember that you are the source of everything that you go on +projecting onto others. + +And whenever there is a mood against or for, immediately move within and go to the +source from where this hate is coming. Remain centered there; do not move to the object. +Someone has given you a chance to be aware of your own anger — thank him +immediately and forget him. Close your eyes, move within, and now look at the source +from where this love or anger is coming. From where? Go within, move within. You will +find the source there because the anger is coming from your source. + +Hate or love or anything is coming from your source. And it is easy to go to the source at +the moment you are angry or in love or in hate, because then you are hot. It is easy to +move in then. The wire is hot and you can take it in, you can move inward with that +hotness. And when you reach a cool point within, you will suddenly realize a different +dimension, a different world opening before you. Use anger, use hate, use love to go +within. + +We use it always to move to the other, and we feel very much frustrated if no one is there +to project upon. Then we go on projecting even on inanimate objects. I have seen persons +being angry at their shoes, throwing them in anger. What are they doing? I have seen +angry persons pushing a door in anger, throwing their anger on the door, abusing the +door, using dirty language against the door. What are they doing? + +I will end with one Zen insight about this. + +One of the greatest of Zen masters, Lin Chi, used to say, "While I was young I was very +fascinated by boating. I had one small boat, and I would go on the lake alone. For hours +together I would remain there. + +"Once it happened that with closed eyes I was in my boat meditating on the beautiful +night. One empty boat came floating downstream and struck my boat. My eyes were +closed, so I thought, 'Someone is here with his boat, and he has struck my boat.’ Anger +arose. I opened my eyes and I was just going to say something to that man in anger, then +I realized that the boat was empty. Then there was no way to move. To whom could I +express the anger? The boat was empty. It was just floating downstream, and it had come +and struck my boat. So there was nothing to do. There was no possibility to project the + + + +anger on an empty boat." + +So Lin Chi said, "I closed my eyes. The anger was there, but finding no way out, I closed +my eyes and just floated backward with the anger. And that empty boat became my +realization. I came to a point within myself in that silent night. That empty boat was my +master. And now if someone comes and insults me, I laugh and I say, 'This boat is also +empty.' I close my eyes and I go within." + +Use this technique. It may work miracles for you. + +THE END. + + + +Chapter 16: Beyond the sin of unconsciousness + + +The first question: + +Question 1 + +THE LAST TECHNIQUE YOU DISCUSSED YESTERDAY SAID THAT WHEN A +MOOD AGAINST SOMEONE OR FOR SOMEONE ARISES, NOT TO PLACE IT ON +THE PERSON IN QUESTION BUT TO REMAIN CENTERED. BUT WHEN WE +EXPERIMENT WITH THIS TECHNIQUE ON OUR ANGER, HATRED, ETC., WE +FEEL THAT WE ARE SUPPRESSING OUR EMOTION AND IT BECOMES A +SUPPRESSED COMPLEX. SO PLEASE CLARIFY HOW TO BE FREE FROM +THESE SUPPRESSED COMPLEXES WHILE PRACTISING THE ABOVE +TECHNIQUE. + +Expression and suppression are two aspects of one coin. They are contradictory, but +basically they are not different. In expression and in suppression, in both, the other is the +center. + +I am angry — I suppress the anger. I was going to express anger against you; now I +suppress the anger against you. But the anger goes on being projected onto you whether +expressed or suppressed. + +This technique is not for suppression. This technique changes the very base of expression +and suppression both. This technique says, do not project it on the other, you are the +source. Whether you express it or suppress it, you are the source. The emphasis is neither +on expression nor on suppression. The emphasis is on knowing from where this anger +arises. You have to move to the center, the source from where anger, hate and love arise. +When you suppress you are not moving to the center, you are struggling with the +expression. + + +Anger has arisen in me. Ordinarily, I can do two things: express it onto someone or +repress it. But in both the cases I am concerned with the other and I am concerned with +the energy of anger that has come to the surface — not with the source. + +This technique is to forget the other completely. Just look at your energy of anger arising +and move deep down to find the source within yourself from where it is coming. And the +moment you find the source, remain centered in it. Do not do anything with anger — +remember. In expression you are doing something with anger; in suppression also you are +doing something with anger. Do not do anything with anger; do not touch it, just use it as +a path. Just go deep down into it to know from where this has arisen. And the moment +you will find the source, it is very easy to be centered there. Anger has to be used, really, +as a path to find the source. Any emotion can be used. + +When you suppress you are not going to find the source, you are just struggling with +energy that has come up and wants to be expressed. You can suppress it, but it will be +expressed sooner or later because you cannot struggle forever with the energy that has +come up. It has to be expressed. So you may not express it upon A, but then you will +express it upon B or C. Whenever you find someone who is weaker than you, you will +express the energy. And unless you express it you will feel burdened, tense, heavy and ill +at ease. + + + +So it will be expressed. You cannot suppress it continuously. From somewhere it will +leak out, because if it is not going to leak out you will be constantly worried by it. So +suppression is really nothing but postponing expression. You will simply postpone. + +You are angry at your boss and you cannot express it; it is not economical. You will have +to push it down, so you just wait until you can express it upon your wife or upon your +child or somewhere — upon your servant... And the moment you reach your home you +will express it. You will find causes, of course, because man is a rationalizing animal. He +will rationalize; he will find something — something very trivial, but now that will +become very meaningful because you have something to express. + +Suppression is nothing but postponing. You can postpone for months, for years. And +those who kn ow say that you can postpone for lives also, but it will have to be expressed. +This technique is not concerned at all with suppression or expression — no! This +technique uses your mood, your energy, as a path for you to go deep down within +yourself. + +Gurdjieff used to create situations in which he would force anger upon you, or hatred, or +any other mood, and that was a created phenomenon. You would not be aware of what is +going to happen. + +Gurdjieff is sitting with his disciples, and as you enter you are not aware of what is going +to happen, but they are ready to create anger in you. + +They will behave in such a way... Someone will say something, and the whole group will +behave so insultingly that you will become furious. Suddenly anger will come up; you are +aflame. And when Gurdjieff has seen that now a point has come from where you can +either go deep down or you can go out, when the peak has come within you and you are +just going to explode, then he will say, "Close your eyes. Now be aware of your anger +and go back." + +Only then would you realize that the situation was a created one. No one was interested +in insulting you — that was just a drama, a psychodrama — but the anger has arisen. And +even if you come to know that it was simply a drama, the energy cannot suddenly go +down, it will take time. Now you can move down with the falling energy to the source. +This energy will just help you to go down to where it has come from; you can connect +now with the original source. And this is one of the most successful methods of +meditation. + +Create any mood... but there is no need because the whole day moods are there. Use any +mood to meditate. Then you have forgotten the other completely, and you are not +suppressing anything. You are just moving down with some energy which has come up. +Every energy comes from the source, so right now the path is wann and you can use that +path to go back. And the moment you reach to the original source, the energy will +subside into the original source. + +It is not suppression: the energy has gone back to the original source. And when you +become capable of reuniting your energy with your original source, you have become the +master of your body, your mind, your energy. You have become the master. Now you +will not dissipate your energy. + +Once you can know how the energy falls back with you to the center, there is no need of +any suppression and there is no need of any expression. Right now you are not angry. I +say something — you become angry. From where is this energy coming? A moment +before you were not angry, but the energy was in you. If this energy can fall back again + + + +to the source, you will again be the same as you were a moment before. + +Remember this: energy is neither anger nor love nor hate. Energy is simply energy — +neutral. The same energy becomes anger; the same energy becomes sex; the same energy +becomes love; the same energy becomes hate. These are all forms of the same energy. +You give the form, your mind gives the form, and the energy moves into it. + +So remember, if you love deeply you will not have much energy to be angry. If you do +not love at all, then you will have much energy to be angry, and you will go on finding +situations in which to be angry. If your energy is expressed through sex, you will be less +violent. If your energy is not expressed through sex, you will be more violent. That is +why militaries will never allow sexual relationships for the soldiers. + +If it is allowed, the militaries will become absolutely impotent to fight. + +That is why, whenever civilization comes to a peak, it cannot fight. So always, more +cultured and more civilized societies are overrun and defeated by lesser civilizations — +always, because a more developed society cares about its individuals' every need, and sex +is included. So when a society is really established, affluent, everybody's sexual need is +fulfilled — but when the sexual need is fulfilled you cannot fight. Y ou can fight very +easily if the sexual need is not fulfilled. So if you want a world of peace, more freedom +for sex will be needed. If you want a world of warring, fighting, then deny sex, suppress +sex, create anti-sex attitudes. + +This is a very paradoxical thing: the so-called saints and sages go on talking about peace, +and they go on talking against sex also. They go on creating an anti-sex atmosphere, and +at the same time they go on saying that the world needs peace, not war. This is absurd. +Hippies are more correct; their slogan is right: "Make love, do not make war." That is +right. If you can make love more, really you cannot make war. + +That is why the so-called sannyasins who have suppressed sex will always be violent, +angry about nothing: just angry, just violent, bubbling, waiting to explode. Their whole +energy is unexpressed. Unless the energy falls down to the source, no +BRAHMACHARYA, no real celibacy is possible. + +You can suppress sex — then it will become violence. If the sex energy moves down to +the center, you will be just like a child. + +The child has more sex energy than you, but it is still in the source; it has not moved to +the body yet. It will move. When the body will be ready and the glands will be ready and +the body will be mature, the energy will move. Why does a child look so innocent? The +energy is at the source; it has not moved. Again the same thing happens when someone +becomes enlightened. The whole energy moves to the source, and the person becomes +childlike. That is what Jesus means when he says, "Only those who are like children will +be able to enter into my kingdom of God." + +What does it mean? Scientifically it means your whole energy has moved back to the +source. If you express, it has moved out. And when it is expressed, you are creating a +habit for the energy to move out, to leak out. If you suppress, then the energy has not +moved to the source and it has not moved out: it is suspended. And a suspended energy is +a burden. + +That is why, if you really express anger, you feel relief. If you go through sex, you feel +relief. If you destroy something, your hate is released and you feel relief. Why is this +relief felt? Because suspended energy is burdensome, heavy. Your mind is cloudy with it. +You have to throw it out or allow it to move back to the original source; these are the + + + +only two things. + + +If it goes back to the source, it becomes formless. In the source, energy is formless. For +example, electricity is formless. When it moves into a fan, it takes one kind of form. +When it moves into a bulb, it takes a different fonn. You can use it in a thousand ways — +the energy is the same. The form is given by the mechanism through which it moves. +Anger is a mechanism, sex is a mechanism, love is a mechanism, hate is a mechanism. +When energy moves into the channel of hate, it becomes hate. If the same energy moves +into love, it becomes love. And when it moves into the source, it is formless energy — +pure energy. It is neither hate nor love nor anger nor sex, simply energy. Then it is +innocent, because formlessness is absolute innocence. That is why Buddha looks so +innocent, childlike. The energy has moved to the source. + +Do not express, because you are wasting your energy and helping the other also to waste +his. Do not suppress, because then you are creating a suspended phenomenon which will +have to be released. Then what to do? + +This technique says, do not do anything with the mood itself, just go back to the source +from where the mood is coming. And while the mood is hot, the path is clear, visible +inside; you can move on it. Use moods for meditation. The result is miraculous, +unbelievable. And once you find the key that shows you how to pour the energy back to +the source, you will have a different quality of personality. + +Then you will not be dissipating anything, then it will look stupid. + +Buddha has said that whenever you are angry against someone, you are punishing +yourself for the misdeed of the other. He has insulted you — that is his deed — and you +are punishing yourself by being angry; you are dissipating your energy. This is stupid. +But then, listening to Buddha, Mahavir, Jesus, we start repressing; we start suppressing +our energy. Then we think that it is not good, that it is stupid to be angry. + +So what to do? Suppress the anger, do not be angry, pull yourself in, close yourself. Fight +with your anger and suppress it. But then you will be sitting on something which will +explode any moment. You are sitting on a Vesuvius — any moment it will explode. + +You go on collecting. The whole day's anger is collected; the whole month's anger is +collected; the whole year's anger, and the anger of your whole life, and then the anger of +many lives, is collected. It is there; it can explode at any moment. Then you become very +afraid of being alive even, because any moment anything can go in and you will explode. +You become afraid, every moment is an inner struggle. + +Psychologists say it is better to express than to suppress, but religion cannot say this. +Religion says both are stupid. In expression you are hanning the other and also yourself. +In suppression you are harming yourself, and you will harm someone else someday. + +Move to the source so that the energy falls back to the source and becomes formless. + +Then you will feel very powerful without being angry. Then you will feel energy — vital +energy. You will be alive, you will have an intense life without forms. Anyone will be +impressed just by your presence. You need not dominate anyone, just your presence and +they will feel that some powerful source has come. + +Whenever someone goes to a Buddha or to a Krishna, suddenly his energy feels a change +of climate because of such a powerful source. The moment you move near, you are +magnetized. No one is magnetizing you, no one is trying anything, there is just the + + + +presence. You may feel that someone has hypnotized you, but no one is hypnotizing. The +presence of a buddha — whose energy has become formless, whose energy has gone to +the source, who is centered at his source — the very presence is hypnotizing. It becomes +charismatic. + +Buddha became enlightened. Before his enlightenment he had five disciples. They were +ascetics and when Buddha himself was a great ascetic, torturing his body in many, many +ways, inventing new and more sadistic techniques to torture himself, those five were his +ardent followers. Then Buddha felt that this was wholly, absolutely absurd. Just by +torturing one's body one is not going to realize oneself. When he realized this, he left +ascetic ways. Those five followers left him immediately. + +They said, "You have fallen down. You are no more an ascetic." They left him. + +When Buddha became enlightened, the first idea that came to his mind was about those +five followers. Once they were his followers, so he must go to them. He felt a duty — he +must find them and tell them what he has found. So he searched for them, and he traveled +in Bihar, from Bodhgaya to Benares, just to find them. They were at Sarnath. Buddha +never came back to Benares again, never came back to Sarnath again, because he came +only for those five disciples. + +He came to Sarnath. It was evening time, the sun was setting, and those five ascetics were +sitting on a hillock. They saw Buddha coming, so they said, "That fallen Gautam Buddha, +that Gautam Siddharth who has fallen from the path, is coming. We must not pay any +respect to him. We should not pay to him even ordinary respect." + +So they closed their eyes. Buddha came nearer and nearer, and those five ascetics began +to feel a change — a change of mind. They became uneasy. When Buddha reached just +near, suddenly all the five opened their eyes and fell at the feet of Buddha. Buddha said, +"But why are you doing this? You decided not to give any respect to me, so why are you +doing this?" + +They said, "We are not doing it, it is happening. What have you gained? You have +become a magnetic force. We are just being pulled. What are you doing to us? Have you +hypnotized us?" Buddha said, "No! I have done nothing to you, but something has +happened in me. + +All the energies have fallen to the source, so wherever I move, suddenly a magnetic force +is felt." + +That is why those who are against Buddha or Mahavir go on saying for centuries, "That +man was not good; he was hypnotizing people." No one is hypnotizing. You become +hypnotized — that is another thing. When your energy falls back to the original source, +you become a magnetic center. This technique is to create this magnetic center in you. + +The second question: + +Question 2 + +YESTERDAY YOU SAID THAT THE MEDITATION TECHNIQUE OF +UNWINDING THE MIND IS VERY SIGNIFICANT. BUT IN THE WEST +HUNDREDS OF FREUDIAN AND JUNGIAN PSYCHOANALYSTS AND +PSYCHIATRISTS ARE PRACTICING THIS TECHNIQUE, BUT THEY ARE NOT +GETTING VERY SIGNIFICANT RESULTS IN TRYING TO TRANSFORM THE +BEING. WHAT ARE THE REASONS FOR THEIR BEING UNSUCCESSFUL? + +There are many things to be noted. One: Western psychology does not yet believe in the +being of man, it believes only in the mind. For Western psychology there is nothing + + + +beyond the mind yet. If there is nothing beyond the mind, then whatsoever you do is not +going to help man really. At the most it can help man to be nonnal — at the most! + +And what is normal? What is normalcy? Just the average. If the average man himself is +not normal, then being normal means nothing. It simply means you are adjusted to the +crowd. So Western psychology is doing only one thing: whenever someone is +maladjusted, Western methods make that man again adjusted to the crowd. + +The crowd is not questioned at all; whether the crowd itself is okay is not the question. +For Eastern psychology, the crowd is not the criterion. Remember this distinction: for +Eastern psychology the crowd is not the criterion, society is not the criterion. Society +itself is ill. Then what is the criterion? For us a buddha is a criterion. Unless you become +buddha-like, you are ill. + +For Western psychology society is the criterion, because a buddha cannot be a criterion. +They do not believe that there is such a thing as the inner being. If there is no such thing +as the inner being, then there cannot be any enlightenment. But when the inner being +becomes illuminated, then there is enlightenment. + +So Western psychology is really just therapeutic, just a part of medicine. It tries, it helps +you to be readjusted, but it is not a transcendence. The Eastern effort is for how to +transcend the mind, because for us there are no mental diseases, remember. For us there +are no mental diseases — rather, the mind is the disease. For Western psychology the +mind is not the disease. The mind is you, it is not the disease. The mind can be healthy, +and the mind can be ill. + +For us the mind is the disease, the mind can never be healthy. Unless you go beyond +mind, you can never be healthy. You can be ill and adjusted or you can be ill and +maladjusted, but you can never be healthy. + +So the nonnal man is not really healthy. He is just within the boundaries, he is ill within +the boundaries. The abnonnal person is one who has gone beyond the boundaries; and the +difference between the two is only of degrees — of quantity, not of quality. + +A madman in a madhouse and you — there is no qualitative difference, only one of +degrees. He is a little bit more mad than you; you are within the boundaries. Functionally, +you can switch on. He cannot switch on now; he has gone further than you. He has an +advanced case, nothing else. You are just on the path and he has reached. + +Western psychology tries to bring him back to the fold, to the herd, to the crowd. It +makes him nonnal. It is good; as far as it goes, it is good. But for us, unless a man goes +beyond mind he is mad, because for us the mind is madness. + +So we are trying to unwind the mind just to know that which is beyond it. They also try +unwinding methods just to adjust the mind, but the beyond is not there. And remember +this: unless you can go beyond yourself, nothing worthwhile happens. Unless you can +reach something which is beyond you, life is meaningless. + +Certain other things also... For Freud and the Freudians, man is really a being that cannot +be happy. The very being for them is such that man cannot be happy. If you are not +unhappy, that is all. Remember, if you are not unhappy, be satisfied — it is enough. + +You cannot be happy. Why? Because Freudian psychology says that happiness lies in +being instinctual, happiness lies in being like an animal, and that man cannot be. Reason +goes on continuously interfering. You can lose your reason and become like an animal; +then you can be happy. But then you will not be aware of happiness. This is the paradox + + + +for them. + +If you fall downward and become like an animal, you will be happy but you will not be +aware. If you try to be aware you cannot be happy, because you cannot become like an +animal. And reason goes on interfering in everything. Man cannot lose reason and also +man cannot live with reason — that is the problem. So you cannot be happy according to +Freud. At the most, if you are wise, you can arrange your life in such a way that you will +not be unhappy. This is a very negative thing. + +For Eastern psychology or metaphysics or religion, a positive goal exists. You can be +happy. Not only happy, you can be blissful. And Eastern psychology says that if you can +feel that you are unhappy, that shows your potentiality, the possibility that you can be +happy; otherwise you would not be able to feel this being unhappy either. + +If a man can see darkness he has eyes, and one who can see darkness can see light. +Remember, blind men cannot see darkness. You may have been thinking that blind men +live in darkness — forget it completely. + +They cannot see darkness, because even to see darkness eyes are needed. If you can feel +unhappiness you have eyes, and if you can feel unhappiness you can feel happiness. +Really, if you cannot feel happiness, there is no possibility of feeling unhappiness. These +are polar opposites. + +You are capable of being totally happy, but then the mind cannot be. Take it in this way: +if you fall downward and become just a body, you will be happy. Freud also agreed with +this. If you fall downward and forget your reason completely, if you become like an +animal, just a body, you will be happy but you will not know it. With the mind you can +know it, but then you cannot be happy because the mind goes on disturbing. The body +can be happy, but the mind goes on disturbing. + +There is another possibility which the East has worked out: go beyond. Freud says that if +you fall downward and become an animal, you will be happy but you will not know it; if +you are in the mind you can know, but you cannot be happy. Eastern search says that if +you go beyond mind you will be happy and also aware. That is a third point — of the +beyond. + +So these are three points. Man is in the middle; below is the animal existence. Go to a +forest and look at the animals. They may not be aware that they are happy, but you will +feel that they are happy. Go to the beach in the morning, or go to a garden in the morning +and listen to the singing of the birds. + +They may not know it, but you will feel they are happy. You have never been singing like +that. Look deep down into their eyes — they are so unclouded and innocent. They are +happy, but you are not happy. + +Fall downward and become a body only — then you will be happy. Or go beyond and +become the spirit or become the being, and you will be happy. But in the middle you will +be always tense, because mind is really not the end. It is just a rope stretched between +two realities: body and soul. + +So you are just on the rope like a NATA, a tightrope walker. A tightrope walker cannot +be at ease. Either he must go back or he must go forward, but he must not remain on the +rope. He must get down from the rope, and there are two possibilities: he can go +backward, or he can go forward and beyond. Mind is a rope, and to live with the mind is +tightrope walking. You are bound to be unbalanced, uneasy; every moment there is +anxiety, anguish. The mind's life is tension. That is why Western psychology succeeds in + + + +making you normal, but fails to make you a self-actualized person. + +But there are new trends, and people are thinking, and the East is now penetrating the +West very deeply. Really, that is the East's way to conquer. The West conquered the East +— their way was very gross. The East has its own ways of conquering — very subtle ways, +silent ways. Now the East is penetrating the Western mind deeply. + +Without any violence, without any visible conflict, the East is penetrating the West very +deeply. And sooner or later Western psychology will have to evolve concepts about +transcending, about how to transcend the mind. + +Unwinding can be helpful in both the ways. If you are just trying to create a normal mind, +unwinding will be helpful. But then your goal is not transcendence. If your goal is +transcendence, then too unwinding can be helpful. All these techniques can be used for +ordinary mental peace, and all these techniques can also be used for a real silence which +is not of the mind. + +There are two types of silence: one of the mind, in which the mind is silent, and another +silence when the mind is no more. The silence when the mind is no more, is altogether +different from mental peace. In mental peace the mind is there, only not very mad. The +madness is slowed down — that is all. + +Western psychology must become a metaphysics, only then can man transcend. It must +become a philosophy also, and ultimately it must become religion. Only then can man be +helped to transcend. + +The third question: + +Question 3 + +YOU HAVE BEEN EXPLAINING MANY MEDITATION METHODS TO US. +HOWEVER, ISN’T IT TRUE THAT NO METHOD CAN BE ALL THAT POWERFUL +UNLESS ONE IS INITIATED INTO IT? + +A method becomes qualitatively different when you are initiated into it. + +I am talking about the methods — you can use them. Once you know the scientific +background and the way, the know-how, you can use it, but initiation makes it +qualitatively different. If I initiate you into a particular method it will be a different thing, +because many things are implied in initiation. + +When I talk about a method and I explain it to you, you can use it on your own. The +method is explained to you, but whether it will suit you or not, how it will work upon +you, what type of person you are, is not discussed. It is not possible. + +In initiation, you are more important than the technique. When the master initiates you, +he observes you. He finds out what is your type, he finds out how much you have worked +through in your past lives, where you are right at this moment, at what center you are +functioning right now, and then he decides about the method; he chooses the method. It is +an individual approach. The method is not important, you are important, you are being +studied and observed and analyzed. + +Your past lives, your consciousness, your mind, your body, they are dissected. You are +felt deeply in terms of where you are, because the journey begins from that point — the +point where you are just now. Just any method will not do. + +Then the master chooses a particular method for you, and if he feels that this particular +method has to be changed for you, that minute alterations or some additions are needed, +he adds, he deletes, he makes the method fit for you. + + + +And then he gives the initiation; then he gives the method to you. That is why it is +insisted that whenever you are initiated in a method, you are not to talk about it. It has to +be secret because it is individual. If you tell it to someone else it may not be helpful, or it +may even be harmful. + +It has to be kept secret. Unless you achieve and your master says that now you can +initiate others, it should not be talked about at all — not uttered, not even to your husband +or your wife or your friend. No, it is absolutely secret because it is dangerous, it is very +powerful. It has been chosen and made for you. It will work for you, but it is not for any +other individual in the world. Really, each individual is so unique that he needs a +different method, and with a slight difference a method can become suitable for him. +What I am talking about — these one hundred and twelve methods — they are generalized +methods. They are one hundred and twelve generalized methods, all the methods which +have been used. This is a general form so that you become acquainted. You can try — if +something suits you, you can go on. But this is not initiation into a method. Initiation is a +personal, individual affair between the master and the disciple. It is a secret transmission. +And many other things are implied in initiation. Then the master chooses a right moment +when he will give the method to you, so that it goes deep into the unconscious. + + +While I am talking, your conscious mind is listening. You will forget. When I have talked +about one hundred and twelve methods, you will not even be able to rename them again +— the one hundred and twelve. You will forget many completely. You will be able to +remember a few, and then you will be mixed up and confused. You will not know what is +what. + +The master has to choose a right moment when your unconscious is open, and then he +gives you the method. Then it goes deep down into the unconscious. So many times +initiation is given in sleep, not when you are conscious. Many times initiation is given to +you in a deep hypnotic trance, when your conscious mind is completely asleep and your +unconscious mind is open. + +That is why surrender is so much needed in initiation. Unless you surrender initiation +cannot be given, because unless you surrender your conscious mind is always alert and +on guard. When you surrender, your conscious mind can then be relieved of its duty and +your unconscious mind can come directly in contact with the master. + +A right moment has to be chosen, and then you have to be prepared for initiation. It may +take months to prepare you. There has to be the right food, the right sleep, and everything +has to come to a tranquil point; only then can you be initiated, so initiation is a long +process, an individual process. Unless someone is ready to surrender totally, initiation is +not possible. + + +So I am not initiating you into these methods, I am just making you acquainted with these +methods. If someone feels that some method suits him deeply and he feels that he should +be initiated into that method, I can initiate him into that method. But then it is going to be +a long process. Then your individuality has to be completely known. You have to become +totally naked so that nothing remains hidden. And then things become very easy — +because when a right method is given to a right person at a right moment, it works +immediately. + +Sometimes it happens that while initiating the disciple, the disciple becomes enlightened, + + + +just the initiation becomes the enlightenment. Then the method becomes alive — when it +is given by a master privately, individually. Whatsoever I am doing now is not initiating, +remember this. This is a scientific approach just to revive the one hundred and twelve +methods, to make them known. + +If someone is interested, he can be initiated. And when you are really interested you will +seek initiation, because working alone on the method is a very long affair. It may take +years, it may take lives, and you may not be able to sustain it for so long a period. +Through initiation it becomes very easy, and then the method becomes a transmission. +Then through the method the master starts working in you. Initiation is a living +relationship with the master, and a long relationship, of course, goes deep. + +It changes you and transforms you. + +The next question: + +Question 4 + +YOU QUOTED GEORGE GURDJIEFF AS SAYING THAT IDENTIFICATION IS +THE ONLY SIN, BUT IN MANY TECHNIQUES THE PROCESS OF +IDENTIFICATION IS USED. THEY SAY, FOR EXAMPLE, BECOME ONE WITH +THE BELOVED, BECOME ONE WITH THE ROSEFLOWER, OR BECOME ONE +WITH THE MASTER. AND, MOREOVER, EMPATHY IS SUPPOSED TO BE A +MEDITATIVE AND SPIRITUAL QUALITY, SO THE ABOVE SAYING OF +GURDJIEFF'S SEEMS TO BE PARTIALLY TRUE AND USEFUL ONLY FOR +CERTAIN TECHNIQUES. + +No! It is not partially true, it is totally true. But you will have to understand. + +Identification is unconscious, but when you use identification in a meditative technique it +is conscious. + +For example, your name is Ram. Someone insults "Ram" — immediately YOU feel +insulted because you are identified with the name Ram. But this is not a conscious thing +for you, it is unconscious. Your mind doesn’t work in this way: "I am called Ram. Of +course, I am not Ram, this is only my name, and everyone is born nameless. This name is +given, and it is arbitrary. This man is only insulting my arbitrary name, so am I to be +angry or not?" You would never reason it out in this way. If you reasoned it out in this +way, you would not be angry at all. Suddenly someone insults "Ram" and you are +insulted, but this is just an arbitrary name. This identification is unconscious, it is not +conscious. + + +When you are identifying with a rose, it is a conscious effort. You are not identified with +the rose. You are TRYING to identify yourself with the rose, and you are trying to forget +yourself. You are trying to become one with the rose, and you are deeply conscious, +aware of the whole process. YOU are doing it. Even if identification is done consciously, +it becomes a meditation. And if you do a certain technique of meditation unconsciously, +it is not meditation — remember. + +You go on doing your prayer every morning or every night unconsciously, just as a +routine affair. While doing it you are not conscious at all of what you are doing. You are +not conscious at all of what words you are saying in prayer. You just repeat them like a +parrot. This is not meditation. And if you are taking your bath consciously, it is a +meditation. So remember this: whatsoever you are doing consciously, with alertness, +fully aware, becomes meditation. Even if you kill someone consciously, while fully + + + +conscious, it is meditative. + +That is what Krishna was saying to Arjuna: "Do not be afraid. Kill, murder, fully +consciously, knowing fully that no one is murdered and no one is killed." Arjuna could +very easily kill his enemies unconsciously. He could go mad in a rage and kill — that is +easy. But Krishna is saying, "Be alert, be fully conscious. Just become the instrument of +divine hands, and know well that no one is killed, no one can be killed. + +The inner being is eternal, immortal. So you are only destroying forms, not that which is +behind the fonns. So destroy the forms." If Arjuna can be so meditatively aware then +there is no violence, no one is killed, no sin is committed. + +I will tell you one anecdote in Nagarjuna's life. Nagarjuna was one of the great masters +India has produced — of the caliber of Buddha and Mahavir and Krishna. And Nagarjuna +was a rare genius. Really, on the intellectual level there is no comparison in the whole +world; such a keen and penetrating intellect rarely happens. He was passing through a +city, a capital city, and he always remained naked. The queen of that kingdom was a +believer, a follower and a lover of Nagarjuna, a devotee. So Nagarjuna came to the palace +to ask for food. He had one wooden begging bowl. The queen said, "Give this begging +bowl to me. I will cherish it as a gift, and I have another made for you. You can take +that." + +Nagarjuna said, "Okay!" The other one was golden, and many precious stones were set in +it; it was very valuable. Nagarjuna didn’t say anything. Ordinarily no sannyasin would +take it, he would say, "I cannot touch gold." But Nagarjuna took it. If really gold is just +mud, then why make any distinction? He took it. Even the queen didn't feel it to be good. +She felt, "Why? He should have said no. Such a great saint! Why has he taken such a +valuable thing while he lives naked, without any clothes, without any possessions? Why +should he not reject it?" + +If Nagarjuna had rejected it, the queen would have insisted, requested, but then she +would have felt better. + +Nagarjuna took it and went away. One thief saw him passing through the city, and the +thief thought, "This man cannot keep this begging bowl, someone is bound to steal it or +someone is bound to take it away from him. With the nakedness — how can he protect +it?" So he followed... the thief followed Nagarjuna. + +Nagarjuna was staying outside the town in an old monastery, alone; the monastery was +just in ruins. He went in, he heard the footsteps of the man, but he didn’t look behind +because he thought, "He must be coming for the begging bowl, not for me, because who +would come? No one ever comes following me to these ruins." + +He went in. The thief stood behind a wall and waited. Nagarjuna, seeing that he was +waiting outside, threw the begging bowl out of the door. The thief couldn’t understand: +"What type of man is this? Naked, with such a precious thing, and he has thrown it out." +So he asked Nagarjuna, "Can I come in, sir? I have to ask a question." + +Nagarjuna said, "I have thrown the bowl out just so that you can come in — to help you to +come in, because I am just going to take my afternoon nap. You would have come for the +begging bowl, but then there would have been no meeting with me. So come in." + +The thief came in. He said, "Such a precious thing and you have thrown it? And you are +such a sage that I cannot lie before you — I am a thief." Nagarjuna said, "Do not be +worried, everyone is a thief. + + + +You proceed on, do not waste time about such unnecessary things." + +The thief said, "Sometimes, looking at persons like you, my mind also longs to know +how this state can be attained. I am a thief; it seems impossible for me. But I hope and I +pray that someday I will also be capable of throwing away such a precious thing. Teach +me something. I go to many sages, and I am a well-known thief, so everyone knows me. +They say, 'First leave your business, your profession, only then can you proceed in +meditation.’ That is impossible, I cannot leave it, so I cannot proceed in meditation." +Nagarjuna said, "If someone says first leave thieving and then proceed in meditation, +then he doesn’t know meditation at all — because how is meditation related with theft? +There is no relationship. So you go on doing whatsoever you are doing. I will give you a +technique; you practice this." + +The thief said, "Now it seems we can go on together. So I can go on doing my +profession? What is the technique? Tell me immediately!" + +Nagarjuna said, "You just remain aware. When you go to steal something, just be fully +conscious and aware. When you are breaking into some house, be fully conscious. When +you are breaking into a treasury, be fully conscious. When you are taking something out +of the treasury, be fully conscious. Do it consciously. Whatsoever you do is no concern +of mine. + +And come after fifteen days, but do not come if you have not practiced. Practice for +fifteen days: go on doing whatsoever you are doing, but do it fully consciously." + +The third day the thief came back and he said, "Fifteen days are too long, and you are a +very tricky fellow. You have given me such a technique that if I am fully conscious I +cannot steal. The last three nights continuously I have been to the palace. I reached the +treasury, I opened it, precious things were before me, but then I became fully conscious. +And the moment I become fully conscious, I became like a Buddha statue. I could not +proceed further; my hand would not move, and the whole treasury seemed useless. So I +have been going back there again and again. What am I to do? And you said that leaving +my profession was not a condition, but your method seems to have a built-in process." +Nagarjuna said, "Do not come to me again. Now you can choose. If you want to go on +stealing, forget meditation. If you want meditation, then forget stealing. You can +choose." The thief said, "You have put me in a dilemma. For these three days I have +known that I am alive. And when I came back without taking anything from the palace, +for the first time I felt that I was a sovereign, not a thief. These three days have been so +blissful that now I cannot leave meditation. You have tricked me; now initiate me and +make me your disciple. + +There is no need to go on trying, three days are enough." + +Whatsoever may be the object, if you are conscious it becomes meditation. Try +identification consciously — it becomes meditation. Unconsciously, it is a great sin. + +You are all identified with many things: "This is mine, that is mine..." You are identified! +"This is my country, this is my nation, this is my national flag..." If someone throws your +national flag you become furious — what is he doing? You have no nation and all national +flags are myths. It is good to play with them like children do; they are toys. But you can +murder and be murdered for them, and countries can be created and destroyed for +insulting a national flag. And it is just a piece of cloth. + +What is happening? You are identified with it. That identification is unconscious. +Unconsciousness is sin. + + + +Enough for today. +THE END. + + + +Chapter 17: Several stop techniques + + +1. JUST AS YOU HAVE THE IMPULSE TO DO SOMETHING, STOP. + +2. WHEN SOME DESIRE COMES, CONSIDER IT. THEN, SUDDENLY, QUIT IT. + +3. ROAM ABOUT UNTIL EXHAUSTED AND THEN, DROPPING TO THE +GROUND, IN THIS DROPPING BE WHOLE. + +Life has two balances: one is of being and the other of doing. Your being is your nature. +It is with you always; you have not to do anything to get it. It is already the case, you are +it. It is not that you possess it, not even that a distance exists between you and it — you +are it. You are your being. Doing is an achievement. Whatsoever you do is not already +the case. If you do it, it will happen; if you do not do it, it will not happen. All that is not +already the case is not your being. + +To exist, to survive, you have to do much. And then, by and by, your activity becomes a +barrier to knowing your being. Your activity is your circumference — you live on it, you +cannot live without it. But it is only the circumference; it is not you, it is not the center. +Whatsoever you have is the achievement of your doing; having is the result of doing. But +the center is surrounded, engulfed by your doing and your having. + +The first thing to note before we proceed into these techniques is that whatsoever you +have is not your being, and whatsoever you do or can do is not your being. Your being +precedes all doing. Your being precedes all your possessions, all your having. + +But the mind is constantly involved in doing and having. Beyond mind or below mind +exists your being. How to penetrate into that center is what religions have been seeking. +This is what has always been the search of all those who are interested in knowing the +basic reality of human existence, the ultimate core, the substance of your being. Unless +you understand this division between the circumference and the center, you will not be +able to understand these sutras which we are going to discuss. + +So note the distinction. Whatsoever you have — money, knowledge, prestige, whatsoever +you have — it is not you. You have them, they are your possessions; you are different +from them. Secondly, whatsoever you do is not your being. You may do it or you may +not do it. For example, you laugh, but you may laugh or you may not laugh. You run, but +you may run or you may not run. But you are and there is no choice. You cannot choose +your being. You are already there. + +Action is a choice. You may choose, you may not choose. You may do "this," you may +not do "this." You may become a saint or you may become a thief, but your sainthood +and your thiefhood are both doings. You can choose, you can change. A saint can +become a thief and a thief can become a saint. But that is not your being: your being +precedes your sainthood, your thiefhood. + +Whenever you have to do something, you have to be there already; otherwise you cannot +do it. + +Who runs? Who laughs? Who steals? Who becomes a saint? The being must precede all +activity. The activity can be chosen, but being cannot be chosen. The being is the +chooser, not the chosen, and you cannot choose the chooser — he is already there. You +cannot do anything about him. Remember this: having, doing, are with you just as a +circumference is with the center, but you are the center. + + + +This center is the self, or you may call it the ATMAN or whatsoever name you like. This +center is your innennost point. How to reach it? And unless one reaches it, knows it, +unless one realizes it, one cannot reach to a blissful state which is eternal, one cannot +know the deathless, one cannot know the divine. Unless one realizes this center, one will +remain in misery, anguish and suffering. The circumference is the hell. These techniques +are the means to enter into this center. + +The first technique: + +JUST AS YOU HAVE THE IMPULSE TO DO SOMETHING, STOP. + +All these techniques are concerned with stopping in the middle. George Gurdjieff made +these techniques very well-known in the West, but he was not aware of VIGYANA +BHAIRAVA TANTRA. He learned these techniques in Tibet from Buddhist lamas. He +worked on these techniques in the West, and many, many seekers came to realize the +center through these techniques. He called them stop exercises, but the source of these +exercises is VIGYANA BHAIRAVA TANTRA. + + +Buddhists learned from VIGYANA BHAIRAVA. Sufis also have such exercises; they +are also borrowed from VIGYANA BHAIRAVA. Basically, this is the source book of all +techniques which are known all over the world. + +Gurdjieff used it in a very simple way. For example, he would tell his students to dance. + +A group would be dancing — a group of, say, twenty people would be dancing — and +suddenly he would say, "Stop!" And the moment Gurdjieff would say stop, they would +have to stop totally. Wherever the pause would fall, they would have to stop then and +there. No change could be made, no adjustment could be made. If one of your feet was +above the earth and you were just standing on one foot, you would have to remain that +way. If you fell, that was another thing, but you were not to cooperate with the fall. If +your eyes were opened, they had to remain opened. Now you could not close them. If +they closed by themselves, that was another thing. But as far as you were concerned, +consciously you had stopped, you had become just like a stone statue. + +Miracles happened because in activity, in dance, in movement, when suddenly you stop, +a gap happens. This sudden stoppage of all activity divides you into two: your body and +you. Your body and you were in movement. Suddenly you stop. The body has the +tendency to move. It was in movement, so there is momentum; you were dancing, and +there is momentum. + +The body is not ready for this sudden stop. Suddenly you feel that the body has the +impulse to do something, but you have stopped. A gap comes into existence. You feel +your body as something distant, far away, with the impulse to move, with momentum for +activity. And because you have stopped and you are not cooperating with the body and its +activity and its impulse, its momentum, you become separate from it. + +But you can deceive yourself. A slight cooperation and the gap will not happen. For +example, you feel uncomfortable, but the teacher has said, "Stop!" You have heard the +word, but still you make yourself comfortable and then you stop. Then nothing will +happen. Then you have deceived yourself, not the teacher, because you missed the point. +The whole point of the technique is missed. Suddenly, when you hear the word "Stop!" +instantly you have to stop, not doing anything. + +Perhaps the posture was inconvenient, you were afraid you might fall down, you might + + + +break a bone. But whatsoever happens, now it is not your concern. If you have any +concern, you will deceive yourself. This suddenly becoming dead creates a gap. The +stopping is at the body and the stopper is the center; the circumference and the center are +separate. In that sudden stopping you can feel yourself for the first time; you can feel the +center. Gurdjieff used this technique to help many. + +This technique has many dimensions; it can be used in many ways. + +But first try to understand the mechanism. The mechanism is simple. You are in activity, +and when you are in activity you forget yourself completely; the activity becomes the +center of your attention. + +Someone has died, and you are weeping and crying, and tears are falling down. You have +forgotten yourself completely. The one who has died has become the center, and around +that center this activity is happening — your weeping, your crying, your sadness, your +tears. If I suddenly say to you, "Stop!" and you stop yourself completely, you will be +totally taken away from your body and the realm of activity. Whenever you are in +activity, you are in it, deeply absorbed in it. Sudden stoppage throws you off balance; it +throws you out of activity. This being thrown leads you to the center. + +Ordinarily, what are we doing? From one activity we move to another. We go on from +one activity to another, from A to B and from B to C. In the morning, the moment you are +awake activity has started. Now you will be active the whole day. You will change to +many activities, but you will not be inactive for a single moment. How to be inactive? It +is difficult. And if you try to be inactive, your effort to be inactive will become an +activity. + +There are many who are trying to be inactive. They sit in a Buddha posture and they try +to be inactive. But how can you try to be inactive? The very effort is again an activity. + +So you can convert inactivity also into activity. You can force yourself to be quiet, still, +but that forcing is an activity of the mind. That is why so many try to go into meditation +but never reach anywhere — because their meditation is again an activity. They can +change... If you were singing an ordinary song, you can now change to a BHAJAN, to a +devotional song. You can sing slow now, but both are activities. You are running, you are +walking, you are reading — these are activities. You can pray — that too is an activity. + +You move from one activity to another. + +And with the last thing in the night, when you are falling into sleep, you are still active; +the activity has not stopped. That is why dreams happen, because the activity goes on. +You have fallen asleep, but the activity continues. In the subconscious you are still active +— doing things, possessing things, losing things, moving. Dreaming means you have +fallen asleep because of exertion, but the activity is still there continuously. + +Only sometimes, for a few moments — and these have become more and more rare for the +modern man — only for a few moments dreaming stops and you are totally asleep. But +then that inactivity is unconscious. You are not conscious, you are fast asleep. The +activity has ceased; now there is no circumference, now you are at the center — but +totally exhausted, totally dead, unconscious. + + +That is why Hindus have always been saying that SUSHUPTI — dreamless sleep — and +SAMADHI — the ultimate ecstasy — are similar, the same, with only one difference. But +the difference is great: the difference is of awareness. In sushupti, in dreamless sleep, you + + + +are at the center of your being — but unaware. In samadhi, in the ultimate ecstasy, in the +ultimate state of meditation, also you are at the center — but aware. That is the difference, +but it is a great difference, because if you are unaware, even if you are at the center it is +meaningless. It refreshes you, it makes you more alive again, it gives you vitality — in the +morning you feel fresh and blissful — but if you are unaware, even if you are at the center +your life remains the same. + +In samadhi you enter yourself fully conscious, fully alert. And once you are at the center +fully alert, you will never be the same again. Now you will know who you are. Now you +will know that your possessions, your actions are just on the periphery; they are just the +ripples, not your nature. + +The mechanism of these techniques of stopping is to throw you suddenly into inactivity. +The point must come suddenly, because if you try to be inactive you will turn it into +activity. So do not try, and suddenly be inactive. That is the meaning of "Stop!" You are +running and I say, "Stop!" Do not try, just stop! If you try, you will miss the point. + +For example, you are sitting here. If I say stop, then stop immediately then and there; not +a single moment is to be missed. If you try and adjust, and you settle down and then say, +"Okay, now I will stop," you have missed the point. SUDDENLY is the base, so do not +make any effort to stop — just stop! + +You can try it anywhere. You are taking your bath — suddenly order yourself to "Stop!" +and stop. Even if it is only for a single moment, you will feel a different phenomenon +happening within you. You are thrown to the center and suddenly everything stops — not +only the body. When the body stops totally, your mind stops also. When you say, "Stop!" +do not breathe then. Let everything stop... no breathing, no body movement. For a single +moment remain in this stop, and you will feel you have penetrated suddenly, at rocket +speed, to the center. And even a glimpse is miraculous, revolutionary. It changes you, +and by and by you can have more clear glimpses of the center. That is why inactivity is +not to be practiced. Use it suddenly, when you are unaware. + +So a master can be helpful. This is a group method. Gurdjieff used it as a group method +because if you say "Stop!" you can deceive yourself easily. First you make yourself +comfortable and then you say "Stop!" Or even if consciously you have not made any +preparation for it, unconsciously you may be prepared. Then you may say, "Now I can +stop." + +If it is done by the mind, if there is a planning behind it, it is useless; then the technique +will not be of any help. So in a group it is good. A master is working with you, and he +says, "Stop!" He will find moments when you are in a very inconvenient posture, and +then a flash happens, a sudden lightning. + +Activity can be practiced; inactivity cannot be practiced — and if you practice it, it +becomes just another activity. You can be inactive only suddenly. Sometimes it happens +that you are driving a car, and suddenly you feel there is going to be an accident, that +another car has reached near yours and in just a moment there will be a crash. Suddenly +your mind stops, breathing stops, everything stops. So many times in such accidents one +is thrown to the center. But you may miss the point even in an accident. + +I was in a car and there was an accident, and one of the most beautiful accidents possible. +Three persons were with me, but they missed the whole thing completely. It could have +been a revolution in their lives, but they missed. The car went down into a river bed, into +a dry river bed, from a bridge. The car was totally upside down, and the three persons + + + +with me began crying; they began weeping. + +One woman was there and she was crying. She was just beside me and she was crying, "I +am dead! I am dead!" + +I told her, "If you were dead, then no one would be here to say this." + + +But she was trembling, and she said, "I am dead! What will happen to my children?" + +Even after we carried her out of the car she was trembling and saying the same thing: +"What will happen to my children? I am dead!" It took at least half an hour for her to +calm down. + +She missed the point. It was such a beautiful thing: suddenly she could have stopped +everything. And one couldn’t do anything. The car was falling from the bridge, so her +activity was not needed at all. One couldn’t do anything. But still the mind can create +activity. She started thinking about her children, and then she began crying, "I am dead!" +A subtle moment was missed. In dangerous situations the mind stops automatically. + +Why? Because mind is a mechanism and it can work with only routine things — that +which it has been trained to do. + +You cannot train your mind for accidents, otherwise they would not be called accidents. +If you are ready, if you have passed through rehearsals, then they are not accidents. +'Accident' means that the mind is not ready to do anything. The thing is so sudden, it +leaps from the unknown — mind cannot do anything. It is not ready, it is not trained for it. +It is bound to stop unless you start something else, unless you start something for which +you are trained. + +This woman who was crying about her children was not at all attentive to what was +happening. + +She was not even aware that she was alive. The present moment was not in her focus of +consciousness. She had moved away from the situation to her children, to death and to +other things. She had escaped. As far as her attention was concerned, she had escaped +from the situation completely. + +But as far as the situation was concerned, nothing could be done; one could only be +aware. Whatsoever was happening was happening. One could only be aware. As far as +the present moment is concerned, in an accident what can you do? It is already beyond +you, and the mind is not prepared for it. The mind cannot function, so the mind stops. +That is why dangers have a secret appeal, an intrinsic appeal: they are meditative +moments. If you race a car and it goes beyond ninety miles per hour, and then beyond +one hundred and then beyond one hundred and ten and beyond one hundred and twenty, +then a situation comes in which anything can happen and you will not be able to do +anything. Now really, the car is beyond control, going beyond control. Suddenly the +mind cannot function; it is not ready for it. That is the thrill of speed — because a silence +creeps in, you are thrown to the center. + +These techniques help you to move to the center without any accidents, without any +danger. But remember, you cannot practice them. When I say you cannot practice them, +what do I mean? In a way you can practice them: suddenly you can stop. + +But the stopping must be sudden, you must not be prepared for it. Y ou should not think +about it and plan it and say that "At twelve o'clock I will stop." Let the unknown happen +to you when you are unprepared. Move in the unknown, the uncharted, without any + + + +knowledge. This is one technique: JUST AS YOU HAVE THE IMPULSE TO DO +SOMETHING, STOP. This is one dimension. + +For example, you have the impulse to sneeze. You are feeling that the impulse is coming, +you are feeling the sneeze coming. Now a moment comes when you cannot do anything + +— it will happen. But in the very beginning of the feeling, when you feel the sensation of +a sneeze coming to you, the moment you become aware, stop! What can you do? Can you +stop the sneeze? If you try to stop the sneeze, the sneeze will come sooner, because +stopping will make your mind more conscious about it and you will feel the sensation +more. You will become more sensitive, your total attention will be there, and that +attention will help the sneeze to come out sooner. It will become unbearable. You cannot +stop the sneeze directly, but you can stop yourself. + +What can you do? You feel the sensation that the sneeze is coming: stop! Do not try to +stop the sneeze, just you yourself stop. Do not do anything. Remain completely +unmoving, with not even your breath going in or coming out. For a moment, stop, and +you will feel that the impulse has gone back, that it has dropped. + +And in this dropping of the impulse a subtle energy is released which is used in going +toward the center, because in a sneeze you are throwing some energy out — in any +impulse. + +'Impulse’ means you are burdened with some energy which you cannot use and cannot +absorb. It wants to move out, it wants to be thrown out; you want a relief. That is why +after you sneeze you will feel good, a subtle well-being. Nothing has happened, you have +simply released some energy which was superfluous, a burden. Now it is no more there; +you are relieved of it. Then you feel a subtle relaxation inside. + +That is why physiologists, Pavlov, B. F. Skinner and others, say sex is also like sneezing. +They say physiologically there is no difference, sex is just like sneezing. You are +overburdened with energy; you want to throw it out. Once it is thrown out your +mechanism relaxes, you become unburdened. Then you feel good. That good feeling is +just a release, according to physiologists, and as far as physiology goes they are right. +Whenever you have some impulse, JUST AS YOU HAVE THE IMPULSE TO DO +SOMETHING, STOP! Not only with a physiological impulse, any impulse can be used. +For example, you were going to drink a glass of water. You have touched the water, the +glass — suddenly stop. Let the hand be there, let the desire to drink, the thirst be there +inside, but you stop completely. + +The glass is outside, the thirst is inside; the hand is on the glass, the eyes are on the glass + +— stop suddenly. No breathing, no movement, as if you have become dead. The very +impulse, the thirst, will release energy, and that energy is used for going to the center. +You will be thrown to the center. Why? Because any impulse is a movement outward. +Remember, 'impulse’ means energy moving outward. + +Remember another thing: energy is always in movement — either going out or coming in. +Energy can never be static. These are the laws. If you understand the laws, then the +mechanism of the technique will be easy. Energy is always in movement. Either it is +moving out or moving in; energy can never be static. If it is static it is not energy, and +there is nothing which is not energy, so everything is moving somewhere. + +When an impulse, any impulse, comes to you, it means energy is moving out. That is why +your hand goes to the glass — you have moved out. A desire has come to do something. +All activities are movements toward that which is without from that which is within — + + + +movements from within to without. + +When you stop suddenly, the energy cannot be static in you. You have become static, but +the energy cannot be static in you, and the mechanism through which it was moving out +is not dead, it has stopped. So what can the energy do? The energy cannot do anything +other than move inward. + +Energy cannot be static. It was going out. You have stopped, the mechanism has stopped, +but the mechanism which can lead it toward the center is there. This energy will move +inward. + +You are converting your energy and changing its dimension every moment without +knowing it. You are angry, and you feel to beat someone or to destroy something or to do +something violent — try this. Take someone — your friend, your wife, your child, anyone + +— and hug, kiss or embrace him or her. You were angry, you were going to destroy +something; you wanted to do some violent thing. Your mind was destructive; the energy +was moving toward violence. Love someone immediately. + +In the beginning you may feel that this is just like acting. You will wonder, "How can I +love? How can I love in this moment? I am angry!" You do not know the mechanism. In +this moment you can love deeply because the energy has been aroused, it has arisen. It +has come to a point where it wants to be expressed, and energy needs movement. If you +just start loving someone, the same energy will move into love and you will feel a rush of +energy that you may not have ever felt. + +There are persons who cannot go into love unless they are angry, unless they are violent. +There are people who can only go into deep love when their energy is moving violently. +You may not have observed, but it happens daily: couples will fight before they make +love. + +Wives and husbands fight, become angry, become violent, and then they make love, and +they may not have understood what was happening. Then it becomes a mechanical habit + +— whenever they fight they will love. And the day they do not fight they will not be able +to love. + +Particularly in Indian villages, where wives are still beaten, if a certain husband stops +beating his wife it is known that now he has stopped loving her. And even wives +understand that if the husband has become totally nonviolent toward them, it means the +love has stopped. He is not fighting, so it means he is not loving. + +Why? Why is fight so associated with love? It is associated because the same energy can +move in different dimensions. You may call it "love" or "hate." They look opposite, but +they are not so opposite, because the same energy is moving. So a person who becomes +incapable of hate becomes incapable of love, according to your definitions of love. A +person who cannot be violently angry becomes incapable of the love which you know. + +He may be capable of a different quality of love, but that is not your love. A Buddha +loves, but that love is totally different. That is why Buddha calls it compassion; he never +calls it love. It is more like compassion, less like your love, because your love implies +hate, anger, violence. + +Energy can move, can change directions. It can become hate, it can become love — the +same energy. + +And the same energy can move inward also, so whenever you have the impulse to do +something, Stop! This is not suppression. You are not suppressing anything, you are just + + + +playing with energy — just playing with energy and knowing the workings of it, how it +works inwardly. But remember, the impulse must be real and authentic; otherwise +nothing will happen. + +For example, when there is no thirst you move to a glass of water and then suddenly you +stop. Nothing will happen because there is nothing to happen — the energy was not +moving. You were feeling love toward your wife, your husband, your friend. You wanted +to hug, to kiss — stop! But the impulse must be there authentically. If the impulse is not +there and you were just going to console someone, to kiss because the kiss is expected, +and then you stop, then nothing will happen because nothing was moving inside. + +So first remember, the impulse must be authentic, real. Only with a real impulse does +energy move, and when a real impulse is suddenly stopped the energy becomes +suspended. With no dimension from where to move out, it turns in. It has to move, it +cannot remain there. + +But we are so false that nothing seems real. You eat your meal because of the clock, +because of the time, not because of hunger. So if you stop, nothing will happen because +there was really no hunger behind it, no impulse. No energy was moving there. + +That is why if you take your meal at one o'clock, at one o'clock you will feel the hunger. +But the hunger is false; it is just a mechanical habit, just a dead habit. Your body is not +hungry. If you do not eat you will feel something is missing, but if you can remain for +one hour without eating you will forget it, the hunger will have subsided. + +A real hunger will grow more; it is bound to grow. If your hunger was real, then at two +you will feel more hungry. If the hunger was false, then at two you will have completely +forgotten. Really, there will be no hunger at two. Even if you want to eat, now you will +not feel hungry. The hunger was just a false, mechanical feeling. No energy was moving, +it was just the mind saying to you that now this is the time to eat, so eat. + +If you are feeling sleepy, stop! But the feeling must be real; that is the problem. And that +is the problem for us now. It was not so in Shiva's time. When the VIGYANA +BHAIRAVA TANTRA was preached for the first time, it was not so. Man was authentic, +humanity was real, pure, nothing was false about it. With us everything is false. You +pretend that you love; you pretend that you are angry. You go on pretending and then you +forget yourself whether you are pretending or whether anything real is left. You never +say what is in you, you never express it. You go on expressing what is not there. Watch +yourself and you will come to know it. + + +You say something, but you feel something else. Really, you wanted to say quite the +opposite, but if you say the real thing you will become totally unfit — because the whole +society is false, and in a false society you can exist only as a false person. The more +adjusted, the more false, because if you want to be real you will feel a maladjustment. +That is why renunciation came into existence, because of a false society. Buddha had to +leave not because it had any positive meaning, but only a negative meaning — because +with a false society you cannot be real. Or at every moment you are in a constant +struggle, unnecessarily and dissipating energy. So leave the unreal, leave the false, so that +you can be real. That was the basic reason for all renunciation. + +But watch yourself, how unreal you are. Watch the double mind. You are saying +something, but you are feeling quite the contrary. Simultaneously, you are saying one +thing in your mind and something else without. Thus, if you stop anything which is not + + + +real, the technique will not help. So find something authentic about yourself and try to +stop that. Not everything has become false, many things are still real. Fortunately, +everyone is real sometimes; in some moment everyone is real. Then stop it. + +You are feeling angry, and you feel it is real. You are going to destroy something, beat +your child, or do something: Stop! But do not stop with a consideration. + +Do not say, "Anger is bad, so I should stop" — no ! Do not say, "This is not going to help +the child, so I should stop." No mental consideration is needed, because if you consider, +then the energy has moved into consideration. This is an inner mechanism. + +If you say, "I should not beat my child because it is not going to do any good to him, and +this is not good for me also. This is useless and this never helps," the same energy which +was going to become anger has become consideration. Now you have considered the +whole thing, and the energy has subsided. It has moved into consideration, into thinking. +Then you stop, but then there is no energy to move in. When you feel angry, do not +consider it, do not think about it being good or bad; do not think at all. Suddenly +remember the technique and stop! + +Anger is pure energy... nothing bad, nothing good. It may become good, it may become +bad — that will depend on the result, not on the energy. It can become bad if it goes out +and destroys something, if it becomes destructive. It may become a beautiful ecstasy if it +moves within and throws you to the center; it may become a flower. Energy is simply +energy — pure, innocent, neutral. Do not consider it. You were going to do something — +do not think, simply stop and then remain stopped. In that remaining you will have a +glimpse of the inner center. You will forget the periphery and the center will come into +your vision. + + +Just as you have the impulse to do something, Stop! Try it. Remember three things... + +One, try it only when a real impulse is there. Secondly, do not think about stopping, just +stop. And thirdly, wait! When you have stopped, no breathing, no movement — wait and +see what happens. Do not try. When I say to wait, I mean do not try now to think about +the inner center. Then you will again miss. Do not think of the self, of the atman. Do not +think that now the glimpse is there, now the glimpse is coming. Do not think, just wait. +Let the impulse, the energy move by itself. If you start thinking about the brahman and +the atman and the center, the energy will have moved into this thinking. + +You can waste this inner energy very simply. Just a thought will be enough to give it a +direction; then you will go on thinking. When I say stop, it means stop totally, fully. +Nothing is moving, as if the whole time has stopped. There is no movement — simply you +are! In that simple existence, suddenly the center explodes. + +The second technique: + +WHEN SOME DESIRE COMES, CONSIDER IT. THEN, SUDDENLY, QUIT IT. + +This is a different dimension of the same technique. WHEN SOME DESIRE COMES, +CONSIDER IT. THEN, SUDDENLY, QUIT IT. You feel a desire - a desire for sex, a +desire for love, a desire for food, anything. You feel a desire: consider it. When the sutra +says consider it, it means do not think for or against it, just consider the desire, what it is. + + +A sexual desire comes to the mind. You say, "This is bad." This is not consideration. You + + + +have been taught that this is bad, so you are not considering this desire, you are +consulting the scriptures, you are consulting the past — the past teachers, the RISHIS — +sages. You are not considering the desire itself, you are considering something else. You +are considering many things; your conditioning, your upbringing, your education, your +culture, your civilization, your religion — but not the desire. + +This simple desire has come. Do not bring in the mind, the past, the education, the +conditioning; do not bring in values. Just consider this desire — what it is. If your mind +could be washed completely of all that has been given to you by the society, of all that +your parents have given to you — the education, the culture — if your total mind could be +washed out, the desire for sex will arise. It will arise, because that desire is not given to +you by the society. That desire is biologically built in; it is in you. + +For example, if a child is born and no language is taught, the child will not learn any +language. He will remain without language. A language is a social phenomenon; it has to +be taught. But when the right moment conies, the child will feel sexual desire. That is not +a social phenomenon, it is biologically built in. The desire will come at the right mature +moment. + +It is not social, it is biological — deeper. It is built into your cells. + +Because you were born out of sex, every cell of your body is a sex cell; you consist of +sex cells. Unless your biology can be washed off completely, the desire will be there. It +will come — it is already there. When a child is born the desire is already there, because +the child is a by-product of a sexual meeting. He comes through sex; his whole body is +built with sex cells. The desire is there, only a time is needed before his body becomes +mature enough to feel that desire, to enact that desire. The desire will be there whether +you are taught that sex is bad or good, whether you are not taught that sex is hell or +heaven, whether you are taught this way or that way, for or against — because both are +teachings. + +The old traditions, the old religions, Christianity particularly, they go on preaching +against sex. The new cults of hippies and yippies and others have started the opposite +movement. They say sex is good, sex is ecstatic, sex is the only real thing in the world. +Both are teachings. Do not consider your desire according to some teaching. Just +consider the desire in its purity, as it is — a fact. Do not interpret it. + +Consideration here means not interpreting, but just looking at the fact as it is. The desire +is there: look at it directly, immediately. Do not bring in your thoughts or ideas, because +no thought is yours and no idea is yours. + +Everything has been given to you, every idea is a borrowed thing. No thought is original +— no thought can be original. Do not bring in thinking, just look at the desire, at what it +is, as if you do not know anything about it. Face it! Encounter it! That is what is meant +by CONSIDER IT. + +WHEN SOME DESIRE COMES, CONSIDER IT. Just look at the fact - at what it is. +Unfortunately, it is one of the most difficult things to do. Compared to this, reaching to +the moon is not so difficult or reaching to the peak of Everest is not so difficult. It is +highly complicated — reaching to the moon is highly complicated, infinitely complicated, +a very complex phenomenon. But compared to living with a fact of the inner mind it is +nothing, because the mind is so subtly involved in everything you do. It is always there. +Look at the word... If I say, "Sex," the moment I say it you have decided for or against. +The moment I say, "Sex," you have interpreted: "This is not good. This is bad." Or, "This + + + +is good." You have interpreted even the word. + +Many persons came to me when the book FROM SEX TO SUPERCONSCIOUSNESS +was published. They came and they said, "Please change the title. The very word 'sex' +makes them disturbed — they have not read the book. And those who have already read +the book also say to change the title. + +Why? The very word gives you a certain interpretation. Mind is so interpretive that if I +say "Lemon juice," your saliva starts flowing. + +You have interpreted the words. In the words 'lemon juice' there is nothing like lemon, +but your saliva starts flowing. If I wait for a few moments, you will become uneasy +because you will have to swallow. The mind has interpreted; it has come in. Even with +words you cannot remain aloof, without interpreting. It will be very difficult, when a +desire arises, to remain aloof, to remain just a dispassionate observer, calm and quiet, +looking at the fact, not interpreting it. + +I say, "This man is a Mohammedan" The moment I say, "This man is a Mohammedan," +the Hindu has thought that this man is bad. If I say, "This man is a Jew," the Christian has +decided that this man is not good. The very word 'Jew', and in the Christian mind comes +the interpretation; the traditional, conventional idea flares up. This Jew is not to be +considered, the old interpretation will have to be imposed on this Jew. + +Every Jew is a different Jew. Every Hindu is a different, unique individual. You cannot +interpret him because you know other Hindus. You may have come to conclude that all +the Hindus you have known are bad, but this Hindu is not in your experience. You are +interpreting this Hindu according to your past experience. Do not interpret, interpretation +is not consideration. Consideration means consider THIS fact — absolutely this fact. +Remain with this fact. + +Rishis have said that sex is bad. + +It may have been bad for them; you do not know. You have the desire, a fresh desire, +with you. Consider it, look at it, be attentive to it. THEN, SUDDENLY, QUIT IT. + +There are two parts to this technique. First, remain with the fact — aware, attentive of +what is happening. When you feel a sexual desire, what is happening in you? See how +you become feverish, how your body begins to tremble, how you feel a sudden madness +creeping in, how you feel as if you are possessed by something else. Feel it, consider it. +Do not exercise any judgement, just move into this fact — the fact of sexual desire. Do +not say it is bad! + +If you have said that, the consideration has stopped, you have closed the door. Now your +face is not toward the desire — your back is. You have moved away from it. You have +missed a moment in which you could have gone deep down into your biological layer of +being. You are clinging to the social layer, which is the uppennost. + +Sex is deeper than your SHASTRAS — scriptures — because it is biological. If all the +shastras can be destroyed — and they can be destroyed, many times they have been — +your interpretation will be lost. But sex will remain; it is deeper. Do not bring superficial +things in. Just consider the fact and move within, and feel what is happening to you. + +What happened to particular rishis, to Mohammed and Mahavir, is irrelevant. + +What is happening to you this very moment? This alive moment, what is happening to +you? + +Consider it, observe it. And then the second part... this is really beautiful. Shiva says, + + + +THEN, SUDDENLY, QUIT IT. + +SUDDENLY — remember. Do not say, "This is bad, so I am going to leave it. I am not +going to move with this idea, this desire. This is bad, this is sin, so I will stop it, I will +suppress it." Then a suppression will happen, but not a meditative state of mind. And +suppression is really creating by your own hands a deceived being and mind. + +Suppression is psychological. You are disturbing the whole mechanism and suppressing +energies which are going to burst out any day. The energy is there, you have simply +suppressed it. It has not moved out, it has not moved in, you have simply suppressed it. It +has simply moved sideways. It will wait and it will become perverted, and perverted +energy is the basic problem with man. + +Psychological diseases are by-products of perverted energy. Then it will take such +shapes, such forms, which are not even imaginable, and in those forms it will try again to +be expressed. And when it is expressed in a perverted form, it leads you into a very, very +deep anguish, because there is no satisfaction in any perverted form. And you cannot +remain perverted, you have to express it. Suppression creates perversion. This sutra is not +concerned with suppression. + +This sutra is not saying to control, this sutra is not saying to suppress. The sutra says, +SUDDENLY, QUIT IT. + +What to do? The desire is there; you have considered. If you have considered it, it will +not be difficult; the second part will be easy. If you have not considered it, look at your +mind. Your mind will be thinking, "This is good. If we can quit sexual desire suddenly, +this is beautiful." You would like to do it, but your liking is not the question. Your liking +may not be your liking, but just the society's. Your liking may not be your own +consideration, but just tradition. First consider, do not create any liking or disliking. Just +consider, and then the second part becomes easy — you can quit the desire. + +How to quit it? When you have considered a thing totally, it is very easy; it is as easy as +dropping this paper from my hand. QUIT IT... What will happen? A desire is there. You +have not suppressed it and it is moving out, it is coming up; it has stirred your whole +being. Really, when you consider a desire without interpretation your whole being will +become a desire. + +When sex is there and if you are not against it or for it, if you have no mind about it, then +just by looking at the desire, your whole being will be involved in it. A single sex desire +will become a flame. Your whole being will be concentrated in the flame, as if you have +totally become sexual. + +It will not only be at the sex center, it will spread all over the body. Every fiber of your +body will be trembling. The passion will have become a flame. Now, quit it. Don’t fight +with it, simply say, "I quit it." + +What will happen? The moment you can simply say, "I quit," a separation happens. Your +body — your passionate body, your body filled with sex desire — and you become two. +Suddenly, in a moment, they are two poles apart. The body is writhing with passion and +sex, and the center is silent, observing. No fight is there, just a separation — remember +this. In fight you are not separate. When you are fighting you are one with the object. +When you have just quit it, you are separate. Now you can look at it as if someone else is +there, not you. + +One of my friends was with me for many years. He was a constant chain smoker, and he +tried and tried, as smokers do, not to smoke. One day, suddenly in the morning, he would + + + +decide, "Now I am not going to smoke," and by the evening he would be smoking again. +And he would feel guilty and he would defend it, and then for a few days he would not +gather courage again to decide not to smoke. Then he would forget what happened. Then +one day, again he would say, "Now I am not going to smoke," and I would just laugh +because this had happened so many times. Then he himself became fed up with the whole +thing — with this smoking and then deciding not to smoke, and this constant vicious +circle. + + +He wondered what to do. He asked me what to do, so I told him, "Do not be against +smoking — that is the first thing to do. Smoke, and be with it. For seven days do not be +against it; do this thing." + +He said, "What are you telling me? I have been against it, and even then I could not leave +it, and you are saying not to be against it. Then there is no possibility of leaving it." + +So I told him, "You have tried with the inimical attitude and you have been a failure. + +Now try the other — the friendly attitude. Do not be against it for seven days." +Immediately he said, "Then will I be able to leave it?" + +So I told him, "Then again... you are still inimical toward it. Do not think about leaving it +at all. How can one think about leaving a friend? For seven days just forget it. Remain +with it, cooperate with it, smoke as deeply as possible, as lovingly as possible. When you +are smoking, just forget everything; become the smoking. Be totally at ease with it, in +deep communion with it. For seven days, smoke as much as you like and forget about +leaving it." + +These seven days became a consideration. He could look at the fact of smoking. He was +not against it, so now he could face it. When you are against something, or someone, you +cannot face it. The very being against becomes a barrier. You cannot consider... How can +you consider an enemy? You cannot look at him, you cannot look into his eyes; it is +difficult to face him. + +You can look deeply only into the eyes of one you love; then you penetrate deep. +Otherwise eyes can never meet. + +So he looked into the fact deeply. For seven days he considered it. He was not against, so +the energy was there, the mind was there, and it became a meditation. He had to +cooperate with it; he had to become the smoker. After seven days he forgot to tell me. I +was waiting for him to say, "Now the seven days have ended, so now how can I leave +it?" He forgot completely about the seven days. Three weeks passed and then I asked +him, "Have you forgotten completely?" + +He said, "The experience has been so beautiful, I do not want to think about anything else +now. It is beautiful, and for the first time I am not struggling with the fact. I am just +feeling what is happening to me." + +Then I told him, "Whenever you feel the urge to smoke, simply quit." He didn’t ask me +how to quit it, he had simply considered the whole thing and the whole thing became so +childish, and there was no struggle. So I said, "When you feel again the urge to smoke, +consider it, look at it, and leave it. Take the cigarette in your hand, stop for a moment, +then leave the cigarette. Let it drop, and as the cigarette drops let the urge also drop +inside." + +He didn’t ask me how to do it, because consideration makes one capable — you can do it. +And if you cannot do it, remember, you have not considered the fact. + + + +Then you were against it, all the time thinking how to leave it. Then you cannot quit it. +When suddenly the urge is there and you quit it, the whole energy takes a jump inward. +The technique is the same, only the dimensions differ: WHEN SOME DESIRE COMES, +CONSIDER IT. THEN, SUDDENLY, QUIT IT. + +Third: + +ROAM ABOUT UNTIL EXHAUSTED AND THEN, DROPPING TO THE GROUND, +IN THIS DROPPING BE WHOLE. + +The same! This technique is the same. ROAM ABOUT UNTIL EXHAUSTED. Just run +in a circle. Jump, dance, and run again until you are exhausted — until you feel that now +not a single step more can be taken. But you will have to understand that your mind will +say that now you are completely exhausted. Do not pay any attention to the mind. Go on +running, dancing, jumping. Go on! Do not pay any attention. The mind will say that now +you are exhausted, now you cannot go on any more. Continue until you feel — not think, +until you feel — that the whole body is tired, that "A single step more has become +impossible, and if I move I will fall down." + +When you feel that you are falling down and now you cannot move, that the body has +become heavy and tired and completely exhausted, THEN, DROPPING TO THE +GROUND, IN THIS DROPPING BE WHOLE. Then drop! Remember, be so exhausted +that dropping happens of itself. If you continue, you will drop. The point has come — you +are just on the verge of dropping. + +Then, the sutra says, drop, and IN THIS DROPPING BE WHOLE. + +That is the central point in the technique: when you are dropping, be whole. What is +meant? Do not drop just according to the mind — that is one thing. Do not plan it; do not +try to sit, do not try to lie down. Drop as a whole, as if the whole body is one and it has +dropped. And you are not dropping it, because if you are dropping it then you have two +parts: you who is dropping it and the body which has been dropped. Then you are not +whole. Then you are fragmentary, divided. Drop it as a whole; drop yourself totally. And +remember, drop! Do not arrange it. Fall down dead. IN THIS DROPPING BE WHOLE. +If you can drop in this way, you will feel for the first time your whole being, your +wholeness. You will feel for the first time your center — not divided, but one, unitary. +How can it happen? The body has three layers of energy. One is for day-to-day affairs, +which is very easily exhausted. It is just for routine work. The second is for emergency +affairs; it is a deeper layer. When you are in an emergency, only then is it used. And the +third is the cosmic energy, which is infinite. The first can be easily exhausted. If I say to +you to run, you will take three or four rounds and you will say, "I am feeling tired." +Really, you are not feeling tired — the first layer is exhausted. In the morning it will not +be so easily exhausted; in the evening it will be exhausted very easily because the whole +day you have been using it. + +Now it needs repair; you will need a deep sleep. From the cosmic reservoir it can again +get energy enough to work. This is the first layer. + +If I tell you to run just now, you will say, "I am feeling sleepy, I cannot run." And then +someone comes and says, "Your house is on fire." Suddenly the sleepiness has gone. +There is no tiredness, you feel fresh; you start running. What has happened so suddenly? +You were tired, and the emergency has made you connected with the second layer of +energy, so you are fresh again. This is the second layer. In this technique, the second + + + +layer has to be exhausted. The first layer is exhausted very easily. Continue. You will feel +tired, but continue. And within a few moments a new surge of energy will come, and you +will feel again renewed and there will be no tiredness. + +So many people come to me and they say, "When we are in a meditation camp, it seems +miraculous that we can do this much. In the morning, for one hour meditating actively, +chaotically, going completely mad. And then in the afternoon we do an hour, and then in +the night also. Three times a day we can go on meditating chaotically." Many have said +that they feel that this is impossible, that they cannot continue and they will be dead tired, +and the next day it will be impossible to move any limb of the body. But no one gets +tired. Three sessions every day, doing such exertions, and no one is tired. + +Why? Because they are in contact with the second layer of energy. + +But if you are doing it alone — go to a hill and do it alone — you will become tired. When +the first layer is finished you will feel, "Now I am tired." But in a big group of five +hundred people doing meditation, you feel, "No one is tired, so I should continue a little +more." And everyone is thinking the same: "No one is tired, so I should continue a little +more. If everyone is fresh and doing, why should I feel tired?" + +That group feeling gives you an impetus, and soon you reach the second layer. And the +second layer is very big — an emergency layer. When the emergency layer is also tired, +finished, only then are you in contact with the cosmic, the source, the infinite. + +That is why much exertion is needed — so much that you feel, "Now it is going beyond +me." The first moment you feel it is going beyond you, it is not going beyond you — it is +just going beyond the first layer. And when the first layer is finished, you will feel tired. +When the second layer is finished, you will feel, "If I do anything now, I will be dead." + +So many come to me, and they say that whenever they reach deep in meditation, a +moment comes when they become afraid and scared and they say, "Now I am afraid. It +seems as if I am going to die. Now I cannot penetrate any further. A fear grips me, as if I +am going to die, now I will not be able to come out of meditation." + + +That is the right moment — the moment when you need courage. A little courage, and you +will penetrate the third, the deepest, infinite layer. + +This technique helps you very easily to fall into that cosmic ocean of energy: ROAM +ABOUT UNTIL EXHAUSTED AND THEN, DROPPING TO THE GROUND, IN +THIS DROPPING BE WHOLE. And when you drop to the ground totally, for the first +time you will be whole, unitary, one. There will be no fragments, no divisions. The mind +with its divisions will disappear, and the being that is undivided, indivisible, will appear +for the first time. + + +THE END. + + + +Chapter 18: Remaining with the facts + + +The first question: + +Question 1 + +YOU SAID LAST NIGHT THAT MODERN MAN HAS BECOME INAUTHENTIC IN +EXPRESSING ANGER, VIOLENCE, SEX, ETC. YOU SAY THAT IN INDIA +STUDENTS AND THE YOUNGER GENERATION ARE LESS VIOLENT IN THEIR +EMOTIONAL EXPRESSIONS THAN ARE WESTERN YOUTH DOES THIS MEAN +THAT WESTERN YOUTH ARE BECOMING MORE AUTHENTIC IN THEIR +EXPRESSIONS? IS PERMISSIVENESS IN THE EXPRESSION OF SEX AND +ANGER A GROWTH TOWARD BEING AUTHENTIC IN EMOTIONAL +EXPRESSIONS? + +Many things have to be considered. One, to be authentic means to be totally factual. +Ideologies, theories, isms, they distort you and they give you a false persona. You +cultivate faces, then whatsoever you show you are not. The reality is missed and you are +suddenly acting and acting. Your life becomes less alive and more a game in which you +are enacting something - not your real soul, but the culture, the education, the society, the +civilization. Man can be cultivated - and the more you are cultivated, the less real you +are. + +The reality is your uncultivated self, untouched by society. But that is dangerous. A child, +if left to himself, will be just an animal. He will be authentic, but he will be an animal; he +will not become a man. So that is not possible, that alternative is closed. We cannot leave +a child to himself. We have to do something, and whatsoever we do will disturb the real +self. + +It will give clothings, it will give faces and masks to the child. He will become a man, but +then he will become an actor; he will not be real. If you leave him to himself he will be +like an animal - authentic, real, but not a man. So it is a necessary evil that we have to +teach him, we have to cultivate and condition him. Then he becomes a man, but unreal. +The third possibility opens with these techniques of meditation. All techniques of +meditation are really "unconditionings." Whatsoever society has given to you can be +taken away again, and then you will not be an animal. Then you will be something more +than man. You will be a supennan - real, but not an animal. + +How does it happen? A child has to be given culture, education. There is no possibility of +leaving him to himself. If you leave him to himself, he will never become a man; he will +remain an animal. He will be real, but he will miss the world, the dimension of +consciousness which opens with man. So we have to make him a man, and he becomes +unreal. + +Why does he become unreal? Because this man is just imposed from without. Inside he +remains the animal. From outside we impose humanity on him. He is divided; he is split +in two. Now the animal goes on living within, and the man without. That is why +whatsoever you do and say is a double bind. You have to maintain a face which has been +given to you, and you continuously have to satisfy your animal also. + +That creates problems, and everyone becomes dishonest. The more you are idealistic, the +more you will have to be dishonest, because the ideal will say, "Do this," and the animal +will be quite the contrary. He would like to do something else that is quite the opposite. + + + +Then what can one do? One can deceive others and oneself; one can maintain a face, a +false face, and go on living the life of the animal. That is what is happening. You live a +life of sex, but you never talk about it. You talk about BRAMACHARYA — celibacy. +Your sex life is just pushed into the dark - not only from society, not only from your +family, but even from your own conscious mind. You push it into the dark as if it is not a +part of your being. You go on doing things which you are against because your biology +cannot change just by education. + +Remember, your inheritance — your biological cells, your structure — cannot be changed +just by ideological education. No school, no ideology can change your inner animal. Only +a scientific technique can change the inner being. Just moral teachings will not help +unless you have a scientific technique to change your total inner consciousness. Only +then will you not be double: you will become single. + +The animal is single, unitary; the saint too is single and unitary. Man is double because +man is just between the two, the animal and the saint - or, you can say between God and +dog. + +Man is just in between. Inside he remains the dog; outside he pretends to be God. That +creates a tension, anguish, and everything becomes false. You could fall down and +become an animal; then you would be more authentic than man. But then you would miss +much — you would miss the possibility to become God. + +The animal cannot become God because the animal has no problems to transcend. +Remember, the animal cannot become God because there is nothing to be transformed. +The animal is at ease with himself; there is no problem, no struggle, no need for +transcendence. The animal is not even conscious, he is simply unconsciously authentic. +But the animal IS authentic, although the authenticity is unconscious. No animal can lie; +that is impossible. But it is not because animals maintain a morality, they cannot lie +because they are not aware of the possibility that one can be false. + +They are bound to be true, but that truth is not their choice, it is their slavery. An animal +is bound to be true, not because he has chosen to be true, but because he cannot choose +the other alternative. There is no alternative for him; he can only be himself. There is no +possibility to be false because he is unconscious of possibilities. + +Man is conscious of possibilities. Only man can be untrue. That is a growth! That is +evolution! Man can be untrue and that is why he can be true. Man can choose. + +Animals are bound to be true; that is their slavery, not their freedom. If you are true, that +is an achievement because you could always be untrue. The possibility is open, but you +have not chosen it, you have chosen the other. It is a conscious choice. + +Of course, then man is always in difficulties. Choosing is always difficult, and the mind +wants to choose something which is easy to do. The mind wants to have the thing with +the least RESISTANCE. To lie is easy; to be false is easy. To appear loving is easy; to +BE loving is very difficult. To create a facade is easy; to create a being is difficult. So +man chooses the simple, the easy, which can be done without any effort and without any +sacrifice. + +With man freedom comes into existence. Animals are just slaves. With man, freedom +comes into existence, choice comes into existence — then difficulties and anxieties. With +man, the untrue, the false, enters. You can deceive. Up to this point it is a necessary evil. +Man cannot be simple and pure in the same way as animals, but he can be more simple +and pure, and he can be more impure and more complex. He can be more simple and + + + +more pure and more innocent, but he cannot be simple and pure and innocent just like +animals. That innocence is unconscious, and man has become conscious. Now he can do +two things: he may go on with his falsities, with his falseness, and constantly remain a +divided being in conflict with himself. + +Or he may become conscious of the whole phenomenon of what has happened and what +is happening to him, and he may decide not to be false. He may leave all that is false. He +may sacrifice, he may choose to sacrifice whatsoever can be gained by being false. Then +he becomes again authentic. + +But this authenticity is different, qualitatively different from the authenticity of an +animal. The animal is unconscious. He cannot do anything — he is forced by nature to be +authentic. When a man decides to be authentic, no one is forcing him; on the contrary, +everything is forcing him to be inauthentic - the society, the culture, all that exists around +him is forcing him to be inauthentic. He DECIDES to be authentic. This decision makes +you a self, and this decision gives you a freedom which no animal can attain and no false +man can attain. + +Remember, whenever you lie, deceive, are dishonest, you are forced to do that. That is +not your choice, not a real choice. Why do you lie? Because of the consequences, +because of the society: you will suffer if you say the truth. You lie and you escape +suffering. + +Really, the society has forced you to lie; it was not your choice. If you say the truth, it is +your choice, no one is forcing you to say the truth. Everything is forcing you to say a he, +to be dishonest. That is more convenient, safe, secure. Now you are entering danger, +insecurity, but this is your choice. + +With this choice, for the first time you attain a self. + +So animal authenticity is one thing, and man’s authenticity is qualitatively different — it is +a conscious choice. So a buddha is one again. He is like an animal, with only one +difference: he is simple, pure, innocent like an animal, but unlike an animal because he is +conscious. Now everything is a conscious choice. He is alert, aware. + +The question is, DOES THIS MEAN THAT WESTERN YOUTH IS BECOMING +MORE AUTHENTIC? In a sense, yes. It is becoming more authentic because it is falling +toward the animal. It is not a choice. Rather, again, it is the easiest course - to fall down. +Western youth is more authentic than Eastern youth in the sense that they are now falling +deeper down toward the animal. Eastern youth is false. Their behavior looks like a facade +- not real, but phony. But these two are not really the only alternatives. + +Eastern youth is false, cultured, cultivated, forced to be something which is not real. +Western youth has revolted against this, revolted toward the authenticity of the animal. +That is why sex and violence have taken more and more of a grip on the Western youth. +In a way they are more authentic, but in a way the greater possibility is lost. + +A buddha is in revolt and a hippie is also in revolt, but the revolts are different; the +quality differs. A buddha is also revolting against the conditioning, but he is going +beyond it - toward a unity which is higher than man and higher than the animal. + +You can revolt and go down toward the animal. Then you are also going toward a unity, +but that is going down, below man. + +But in a way, revolt is good - because once revolt comes into the mind, the day is not far +off when you will come to understand that this revolt is just going backwards. A revolt is + + + +needed which must go forward. So Western youth may come to understand sooner or +later that their revolt is good, but the direction is wrong. Then it will become possible in +the West for a new humanity to be born. + +In this sense, the Eastern phoniness is not worth anything. It is better to be authentic, to +be revolting, because a revolting mind will not take much time to see that the direction is +wrong. But a phony youth may continue for millennia, may not be even aware that there +is a possibility to revolt and to go beyond. But between the two neither is worth +choosing; the third alternative is the way. + +Man must revolt against conditioning and go beyond. If you fall below then you may +have the pleasure of revolting, but the revolt has become destructive — it is not creative. +Religion is the deepest revolt, but you may not have thought about it in that way. We take +religion as the most orthodox thing - the traditional, the conventional. It is not. Religion +is the most revolutionary thing in human consciousness, because it can lead you toward +the unity which is higher than animal, higher than man. + +These techniques are concerned with that revolution. + +So when Shiva says be authentic, he means do not be phony, do not continue to be +phony. Be aware about your false persona, about your clothings, dresses, masks - and +then be authentic. Whatsoever you are, realize it. + +The real problem is that one becomes deceived by one's own deceptions. You talk about +compassion... In India we talk so much about compassion, nonviolence, everyone thinks +that he is nonviolent, but if you look at a person's acts, at his relationships, at his gestures, +he is violent. But he is not aware that he is violent. He may be violent even in his +nonviolence. If he is trying to force others to be nonviolent, that is violence. If he is +forcing himself to be nonviolent, that is violence. To be authentic means he must +understand and realize what is his real state of mind - not ideas, not principles, but the +state of mind. What is his state of mind? Is he violent? Is he angry? + +This is what is meant by Shiva when he says, be authentic. Know what is the real, your +fact, because only a fact can be changed.If you want to transfonn yourself, you must +know your facticity. You cannot change a fiction. You are violent and you think that you +are nonviolent — then there is no possibility of any transformation. That nonviolence is +nowhere, so you cannot change. And the violence is there, but you are not aware of it, so +how can you change it? + +First know the facts as they are. + +How to know the facts? Encounter them without your interpretations. That is what +yesterday's sutra said: CONSIDER. Your servant has come — consider how you look at +your servant. Your boss has come into the room — consider how you look at your boss. Is +the look the same when you look at your servant as when you look at your boss? Are +your eyes the same, or is there any difference? If there is any difference you are a violent +man. + +You do not look personally at the man, at the human being, your look is an interpretation. +If he is rich you look in a certain way; if he is poor you look in a different way. Your +look becomes economical. You are not looking at the man right before you, you are +looking at some bank balance. And if the man is poor, your look has a subtle violence in +it, a degrading, insulting look. If the man is rich you have a subtle appreciation, a +welcome. A deep concern is there always, whatsoever you are doing. + +Look at your concern. You are angry at your son or at your daughter, and you say you are + + + +angry for his or her sake, for his or her good. Go deep down; consider whether it is true. +Your son has been disobedient and you are angry. You say you want to change him +because it is for his own good. Look within and consider the fact. Is the fact that you are +thinking about his good, or do you simply feel insulted because he has disobeyed you? +You feel hurt because he has disobeyed you. + +Your ego is hurt because he has disobeyed you. + +If your ego is hurt, this is the fact, and you go on pretending that that is not the thing - +that you are just thinking about his good, and that is why you are angry. You are angry +just for him; you are not really angry. How can you be angry? You are a loving father, so +you are not angry at all. How can you be angry? You love him so much, but because he is +going on a wrong path, because of your love, you want to change him, and that is why +you are angry. You are just pretending to be angry to help him. + +But is this the fact? Are you just pretending, or do you feel hurt because he has disobeyed +you? And are you so sure that whatsoever you say is right for him? Go deep down within +yourself, look at the fact, consider it - and be authentic. If you are really offended by his +disobedience, then know it well that you are offended and you feel hurt, and that is why +you are angry. This is being authentic. + +Then you can do much for a change in you because facts can be changed; fictions cannot +be changed. With everything that you are doing or you are thinking, go deep down. Dig +out the facts, and do not allow interpretations and words to color it. + +If this consideration is there, by and by you will become authentic. And this authenticity +will not be like that of an animal. This authenticity will be like that of a saint, because the +more you know how ugly you are, the more you know how violent you are, the more you +penetrate inside your facts and become aware of the nonsense that you are doing, the +more this awareness will help you. + +And by and by your ugliness will drop away, will wither away, because if you are aware +of your ugliness it cannot continue. + +If you want it to continue, do not be aware of it and create a facade of beauty around it. +Then you will see the beauty, and the ugliness will remain behind, never to be seen +directly. Everyone else will see it — that is the problem. The son will see that the father is +not angry for his good. He will see that the father is angry because he has been disobeyed +and he feels hurt; the son will kn ow it. You cannot hide your ugliness from others. You +can hide it only from yourself. Your look will reveal to everyone that there is +violence. You can only deceive yourself that there was compassion. + +That is why everyone thinks of himself as a very superior being, and no one else agrees +with him. Your wife doesn’t agree with you that you are a superior being. Your children +are not in agreement with you that you are a superior being. Your friends do not agree, no +one agrees with you, that you are a superior being. + +They have a popular saying in Russia that if everyone says their mind totally, exactly as +it is, there will not be four friends in the whole world. Impossible! Whatsoever your +friend thinks about you, he never says to you. That is why friendship continues. But he is +always saying things behind you, and you are saying what you think about your friend +behind him. + +No one says honestly what he thinks because then there will be no possibility of any +friendship. Why? No one agrees with you, and the reason is only this: you can only + + + +deceive yourself; you cannot deceive anyone else. Only self-deception is possible. + +And when you think you are deceiving others you are simply deceiving yourself. It may +be that others pretend to you that they have been deceived by you, because there are +moments when it is convenient to play the role of being deceived. It may be beneficial for +the person. You talk to someone about your greatness... Everyone is talking directly or +indirectly about his greatness, his superiority. Someone may agree with you. If it is +beneficial to him he will pretend to you that he is being deceived by you, but he knows +inside who you are. + +You cannot deceive anyone unless someone is ready to be deceived; that is another thing. +By authenticity I mean: remember your facticity. Always sort it out from your +interpretations. Throw away your interpretations and look at the fact of what you are. + +And do not be afraid — much ugliness is there. If you are afraid, then you will never be +able to change it. If it is there, accept that it is there; consider it. + +This is what consideration means: consider it, look at it in its total nakedness. Move +around it, go to its roots, analyze it. See why it is there, how you help it to be there, how +you feed it, how you protect it, how it has grown to be such a big tree. + +See your ugliness, your violence, your hatred, your anger, how you have protected it, +how you have helped it to grow up to now. Look at the roots; look at the whole +phenomenon. + +And Shiva says That if you consider it totally you can drop it immediately, this very +moment, because it is you who have been protecting it. It is you who have been helping it +to become rooted in you. It is your creation. You can drop it immediately - just now. You +can leave it, and then there is no need to look again toward it. But before you can do this, +you will have to know it - what it is, the whole mechanism, the whole complexity of it, +how you help it every moment. + +If someone says something insulting to you, how do you react? Have you ever thought +about it - that he may be right? Then look! He may be right. There is every possibility of +him being more right than you are about yourself, because he is aloof, far away; he can +observe. + +So do not react. Wait! Tell him, "I will consider what you have said. You have insulted +me, and I will consider the fact. You may be right. If you are right, then I will give you +my thanks. Let me consider it. And if I find that you are wrong I will inform you." But do +not react. Reaction is different. + +If you insult me, I say to you, instead of reacting, "Wait. Come back after seven days. I +will consider whatsoever you have said — you may be right. + +I will put myself in your place and will observe myself; I will create a distance. You may +be right, so let me look at the fact. It is very kind of you to have pointed it out, so I will +look at it. If I feel that you are right, I will tha nk you; if I feel that you are wrong, I will +inform you that you are wrong." But what is the need of reaction? + +You insult me — then what do I do? I insult you immediately then and there. I escape +consideration: I have reacted. You insulted me, so I have insulted you. + +And remember, reaction can never be right. It can NEVER be right! If you insult me, you +create the possibility of my being angry. And when I am angry I am not conscious, I will +say something which I have never thought about you. This very moment, because of your +insults I react in a violent way. A moment later I may repent. + +Do not react — consider the facts. And if your consideration is total, you can drop + + + +anything. It is in your hands. Because you are clinging to it, it is there. But you can drop +it immediately, and there will be no suppression - remember. When you have considered +a fact, there will never be any suppression. Either you like it and you continue it, or you +do not like it and you drop it. + +The second question: + +Question 2 + +ACCORDING TO LAST NIGHT’S TECHNIQUE, WHEN ANGER, VIOLENCE, SEX, +ETC., ARISES, ONE SHOULD CONSIDER IT AND THEN SUDDENLY QUIT IT. + +BUT WHEN ONE DOES IT, ONE SOMETIMES FEELS SICK AND UNEASY. + +WHAT ARE THE REASONS FOR THESE NEGATIVE FEELINGS? + +Only one reason: your consideration is not total. Everyone wants to quit anger without +understanding it; everyone wants to quit sex without understanding it. And there is no +revolution without understanding. You will create more problems and you will create +more misery for yourself. Do not think of renouncing anything, just think of how to +understand it: understanding, not renunciation. There is no need of thinking to quit +anything. The only need is to understand it in its totality. If you have understood it in its +totality, the transformation will follow. If it is good for you, if it is good for your being, it +will grow. If it is bad for you, it will drop. So the real thing is not quitting, it is +understanding. + +Why do you think about renouncing anger? Why? Because you have been taught that +anger is bad. But have YOU understood it as bad? Have YOU come to a personal +conclusion, through your own deepening insight, that anger is bad? If you have come to +this conclusion through your own inner search, there will be no need to quit it — it will +have already disappeared. The very fact of knowing that this is poisonous is enough. + +Then you are a different man. + +But you go on thinking of leaving, quitting, renouncing. Why? Because people say that +anger is bad, and you are simply influenced by whatsoever they say. + +Then you go on thinking that anger is bad, and when the moment comes you go on being +angry. + +This is how a double mind is created, you remain with anger, and yet you always think +anger is bad. This is inauthenticity. If you think that anger is good, then do it and do not +say that anger is bad. Or if you say anger is bad, then try to understand whether this is +your realization or whether someone else has said it to you. + +Everyone is creating misery around himself because of others. Someone says this is bad +and someone says that it is good, and they go on forcing these ideas in your mind. The +parents are doing this, the society is doing this, and then one day you are just following +others’ ideas. And the difference between your nature and others' ideas cause a split; you +become schizophrenic. You will do something and you will believe in the very contrary. +That will create guilt. Everyone feels guilty. Not that everyone IS guilty, everyone feels +guilty because of this mechanism. + +They say anger is bad. Everyone has said to you that anger is bad, but no one has told +you how to know what anger is. Everyone says sex is bad. They have been teaching, +teaching, that sex is bad, and no one says what sex is and how to know it. Ask your +father, and he will become uneasy. He will say, "Do not talk about such bad things!" But +these bad things are facts. Even your father could not escape it; otherwise you would not +have been bom. + + + +You are a naked fact. And no matter what your father says about sex, he couldn’t escape +it. But he will feel uneasy if you ask him because no one has told him; his parents never +told him why sex is bad. + +Why? And how to know it? And how to go deep into it? No one will tell this to you, they +will just go on labelling things: this is bad and that is good. That labelling creates misery +and hell. + +So one thing to remember - for any seeker, a real seeker, this is a basic thing to be +understood: remain with your facts, try to know them. Do not allow the society to force +its ideology on you. Do not look at yourself through others' eyes. You have eyes; you are +not blind. And you have the facts of your inner life. Use your eyes! That is what +consideration means. And if YOU consider, then this will not be a problem. + +BUT WHEN ONE DOES IT, ONE SOMETIMES FEELS SICK AND UNEASY. You +will feel this if you have not understood the facts; you will feel uneasy, because it is +subtle repression. You know already that anger is bad. If I say to consider it, you do +consider so only that it can be renounced. That renouncing is there, always present in +your mind. + +Someone was here, a very old man, sixty years of age. He is a very religious man - and +not only a religious man, but a type of religious leader. He has been teaching many +people and he has written many books. He is a moralizer, and now, at the age of sixty, he +comes to me and he says, "You are the only person to whom I can tell my real problems. + +How can I get rid of sex?" + +And I have heard him speak about the misery of sex. He has written books, and he has +tortured his sons and daughters. If you want to torture someone, morality is the best trick +- the easiest. Immediately you create guilt in the other person. That is the subtlest torture. +Talk about brahmacharya and you will create guilt, because it is so difficult to be a +brahmachari, to be a pure celibate. It is so difficult, and when you talk about +brahmacharya and the other cannot be he feels guilty. + +You have created guilt; now you can torture. You have made the other man degraded, +inferior. Now he will never be at ease. He will have to live in sex and he will feel guilty. +He will always think about brahmacharya, and he won’t know what to do. His mind will +think of brahmacharya, and his body will live with sex. Then he will go against his body. +Then he will think that "I am not my body. This body is an evil thing." And once you +create guilt in someone, you have destroyed a mind, poisoned it. + +The old man came and asked how to get rid of sex, so I told him first to be aware of the +fact - and he had missed much opportunity. Now the sex will be weak, and the awareness +will need more effort. When sex is violent and the energy is there and sex is young, you +can be aware of it very easily. It is so forceful, it is not difficult to see and know and feel +it. + +This man, at the age of sixty, now feeble, weak, ill, will have difficulty in being aware of +sex. + +When he was young he was thinking about brahmacharya. He couldn’t have lived that; he +has five children. Then he was thinking about brahmacharya and missing the opportunity. +And now he is thinking of what to do about sex. So I told him to be aware of it - to forget +his teachings and burn his books, and not to say anything about sex to anyone without +knowing it himself. I told him to be aware of it. + +So he said, "If I try to be aware, in how many days will I get rid of it?" This is how the + + + +mind works. He is ready even to be aware, but just to get rid of it. + +So I told him, "If YOU are not aware of it, who is deciding to get rid of it? How do you +conclude that sex is bad? Is this taken for granted? Is there no need to discover it within +yourself?" + +Do not think of renouncing anything. Renunciation means you are just being forced by +others. Be individual. Do not allow society too much domination over you, do not be a +slave. You have eyes, you have consciousness, you have sex, anger and other facts. Use +your consciousness, use your eyes. Be aware. + +Think of yourself as if you are alone. No one is there to teach you. What will you do? +Start from the very beginning, from ABC, and go inside. Be totally aware. Do not decide, +do not be in haste; do not conclude so soon. + +If you can reach a conclusion through your own awareness, that very conclusion will +become a transformation. Then you will not feel any unease, there will be no repression. +Only then can you quit anything. I am not saying, be aware to quit. Remember, I am +saying: if you are aware, you can quit anything. + +Do not make awareness a technique to quit. Quitting is just a consequence. If you are +aware you can quit anything, but you may not decide to quit; there is no necessity. You +may never decide to quit. Sex is there — if you become fully aware of it, you may not +decide to quit it. If with full awareness you decide not to quit it, then sex has its own +beauty. If with full awareness you decide to quit it, then your renunciation is also +beautiful. + +Try to understand me. Whatsoever comes, whatsoever happens through awareness is +beautiful, and whatsoever happens without awareness is ugly. That is why your so-called +brahmacharis, celibate monks, are basically ugly. Their whole way of life is ugly. That +celibacy has not come as a consequence, it is not their own search. Now look at a person +like D. H. Lawrence. His sex is beautiful more beautiful than the renunciation of your +celibate monks, because his sex is with full awareness. Through inner search he has come +to conclude that he is going to live with sex. He has accepted the fact; now there is no +hitch, no guilt. Rather, sex has become glorious. + +So a D. H. Lawrence, fully aware of his sex, accepting it, living it, has a beauty of his +own. + +A Mahavir, fully aware of the fact and then coming to leave it, to quit it, has a beauty of +his own. They both are beautiful - D. H. Lawrence and Mahavir. They BOTH are +beautiful! But the beauty is not of sex and not of quitting sex, the beauty is of awareness. +This must also be constantly remembered - that you may not come to the same +conclusion as Buddha; there is no necessity. You may not come to the same conclusion +as Mahavir; there is no inevitability. If there is any inevitability there is only one, and +that is of awareness. When you are fully aware, whatsoever happens to you is beautiful, +is divine. + +Look at the sages of the past: Shiva sitting with Parvati. Parvati is sitting in his lap in a +deep love gesture. You cannot conceive of Mahavir in such a pose — impossible! You +cannot conceive of Buddha in such a pose. Just because Ram is pictured with Sita, Jains +cannot accept him as an AVATAR, as a divine incarnation, because he is still with +women. It is impossible for Jains to conceive of him as an incarnation of God, so they say +he is a great man - a MAHAMANAVA, but not an avatar. He is a great man, but still a +man because the woman is there. When the woman is there, you cannot go beyond man; + + + +the counterpart is there, so you are still a man. Of course, Ram was a great man, but not +beyond man, Jains say. + + +If you ask Hindus, they have not talked about Mahavir at all - not even talked about him, +not even mentioned him in their books - because for the Hindu mind, man alone without +a woman is half, a fragment, not the whole. Ram alone is not the whole, so Hindus say +"Sitaram." They put the woman first. They will never say "Ramsita," they will say +"Sitaram." They will say "Radhakrishna." They will put woman first for a basic reason - +because man is bom out of woman and man alone is half. With woman he becomes +whole. + +So no Hindu god is alone. The other part, the other half, is there. Sitaram is really the +whole; Radhakrishna is the whole. Krishna alone is half. There is no need for Ram to quit +Sita and there is no need for Krishna to quit Radha. Why? They are fully aware. + +You cannot find a more aware man, a more conscious man than Shiva, but he is sitting +with Parvati in his lap. It creates problems. Then who is right? Is a Buddha right or is a +Shiva right? Problems are created because we do not know that everyone flowers +individually. Buddha and Shiva both are fully conscious, but it happens to Buddha that he +leaves something in this full consciousness — that is his choice. It happens to Shiva in his +full consciousness that he accepts everything. They are both at the same point of +realization, of awareness, but their expression is different. + +So do not fall into any pattern. + +No one knows what will happen when you become aware. Do not decide before +becoming aware that you are going to quit this and that. Do not decide — no one knows. +Wait! Be aware, and let your being flower. No one knows what will happen. With +everyone there is an unknown possibility of flowering. And you need not follow anyone - +because every following is dangerous, destructive; every imitation is suicide. Wait! + +These techniques are only to make you aware. And when you are aware, you can quit +anything or you can accept anything. When you are not aware, remember what is +happening: neither can you accept, nor can you quit. You have sex — neither can you +accept it totally and forget about it, nor can you quit it. I say either accept it and forget, or +quit it and forget. + +But you cannot do either of the two.; you will always be doing both. You will accept and +then you will think of quitting, and this is a vicious circle. When you have had sex, then +for a few hours or a few days you will think of quitting it. Really, you are doing nothing +else but regaining energy. When you have regained energy, you will again think of +having it. And this will go on for your whole life. It has been so for so many lives. When +you become fully aware, you can decide. Either you accept it — then that acceptance +gives a beauty — or you quit it — then that quitting is also beautiful. + +One thing is certain: when you are aware you can forget it - either way. + +It is not a problem then. Your decision is total and the problem drops. But if you feel any +uneasiness, it means you have not considered, you have not been aware. + +So be more aware. Consider the fact more - more deeply, more individually without the +conclusions of others. + +The third question: + +Question 3 + + + +WHEN AN IMPULSE IS AUTHENTIC, I AM UNAWARE. HOW CAN I EXERCISE +"STOP!"? + +This is a very significant question. It is easy to stop anything when you are false, and it is +difficult to stop anything when you are authentic. When the anger is real, you will forget +about the technique of Stop! When the anger is false you will remember, you can do it. +But when the anger is false there is no meaning, there is no energy. You can stop it, but it +is useless. When the anger is real, only then is the energy there, and if you stop it the +energy will take an inner turn. + +So what to do? Try to be aware not of anger directly, but of easier things. You are +walking — be aware of it. Do not start with anger, start with easier things. You are +walking — be aware of it, there is no problem. Then suddenly stop your walk. Start with +easy things, and then go on to a deeper, more complex thing. Do not start with complex +things, do not jump to sex immediately. It is more subtle, and you will need a more deep +awareness for it. + +So first create awareness with easier things. + +You are walking, you are taking a bath, you feel thirsty, you feel hungry — start with +these things, all very ordinary things. You were just going to speak something to +someone: Stop! Even in the middle of a sentence. You were going to relate a story you +have related a thousand times, and you have bored everyone with it. You were again +starting, "Once there was a king..." Stop! Start with easy things more easy things. + +There is a fly on your head and you were just going to send it away with your hand: Stop! +Let the fly be there, let your hand remain stopped. Do it with easy things so that you have +the feeling, the feel of stopping with awareness. Then move to complex things. + +Anger is a very complex thing; take a mechanical thing. Every day in the morning you +step out of your bed. Have you observed? You step out every day in the same way. If +your right foot comes first, it comes first always. Tomorrow morning when the right foot +is coming out, stop and let the left foot come. + +Do it with easier things; then there is nothing to sacrifice but a habit. Always you start +walking with the right foot first: Stop! Anything... anything can be used. Find something +— the easier, the better. And when you become a master of easier things and you can stop +suddenly, and you can have the feel of awareness, a sudden calmness comes to you. For a +second, an inner silence explodes. + + +Gurdjieff used to train his disciples in very easy things. For example, you say something +and you nod your head. Then he would say to you, "Say the same thing, but do not nod +your head." It is a mechanical habit. I am saying something; I make a gesture with my +hand. Gurdjieff would say, "Do not make this gesture when you say this thing — +remember this. Make any other gesture, but remember only this: when you are saying +this, do not make this gesture. Be aware of it." + +Use anything -anything! You always start your conversation with a particular sentence — +do not start with it. Someone says something and you have a mechanical response — do +not respond that way, say something else. Or if you have started saying the old thing, +stop in the middle. Stop with a jerk, suddenly. Try this, and only when you feel a +mastery, move to complex things. + +This is one of the basic tricks of the mind, that it will always tell you to jump to a +complex thing. Then you are a failure, then you will never try again; you know that it + + + +cannot be done. This is a trick of the mind. The mind will say, "Okay, now you know that +the exercise of stopping will be a failure when you are angry, hot and angry." Then you +will not try again. + +Try with cold things; do not move to the hot. And when you can do it with cold things, +then move to the hot. With gradual steps feel the path, and do not be hasty; otherwise +nothing will be accomplished. + + +The last question: + +Question 4 + +AFTER HEARING ABOUT SO MANY MEDITATION TECHNIQUES IN VIGYANA +BHAIRAVA TANTRA, I AM BEGINNING TO FEEL THAT THE INNER DOOR +CANNOT REALLY OPEN BY TECHNIQUES, BUT THAT IT REALLY DEPENDS +ON THINGS LIKE INITIATION, THE GRACE OF THE MASTER, ETC. IS THAT +NOT REALLY THE CASE? AND WHEN AND HOW CAN ONE BECOME +CAPABLE OF RECEIVING INITIATION? + +Really, the grace of the master is again a technique. Just by changing the words nothing +changes. It means surrender. You can receive the grace of the master only when you +surrender, and surrender is a technique. If you do not know how to surrender, you will +not receive any grace. So really, grace is not given, it is received. No one can give grace +— you can receive it. With an enlightened person the grace is flowing always. It is there; +it is just his nature. + +Just as a lamp is burning and the light is radiating, the enlightened person is always +radiating grace. It is not any effort. It is flowing effortlessly, it is there. If you can +receive, you can receive. If you cannot receive, you cannot receive. + +So it may look paradoxical if I say this, but it is the truth: the grace is not given by the +master. It is received by the disciple. But how to be a disciple? Again, it is a technique. +How to surrender? How to become receptive? Surrendering is the most difficult of things. + +You cannot surrender your anger, you cannot surrender your sadness, so how can you +surrender your total being? You cannot surrender nonsensical things, you cannot +surrender your diseases, so how can you surrender yourself? + +Surrendering means surrendering totally. You leave everything totally to your teacher, to +your master. You say, "Now I am no more. Now you are — do whatsoever you like." And +when you wait, and when you do not again go and ask him when he is going to do this or +that, you have surrendered, you are finished. There is nothing to be asked any more. In +the right moment the thing will happen. But how to do it? + +This also will need a very great awareness. Ordinarily, stupid people think that surrender +is very easy. That is stupidity. They think that if you go and touch the feet of a master +you have surrendered. Just touching the feet can be a surrender, but do not think that +because you have touched the feet you have surrendered. Surrendering is an inner +attitude. It is putting yourself off, forgetting yourself completely. Only the master +remains; you are no more. Only the master is. + +This can be done only with a very deep awareness. What is that awareness? That +awareness will come if you go on doing these techniques and you feel continuously that +you are helpless. But do not decide on your helplessness before doing them — it will be +false. + + + +First do them, and do them authentically. If the techniques happen to help you, there will +be no need of surrender; you will be transformed. If you do them authentically, really, +fully, if you are not deceiving yourself and still nothing happens, then you will feel a +helplessness. You will feel, "I cannot do anything." If this goes deep in you, this feeling +of helplessness, only then will you be capable of surrendering - not before. + +Do you feel helpless? No one feels helpless. NO ONE feels helpless! Everyone knows," I +can do, if I want I can do. It is because I do not want to that I am not doing." Everyone +thinks that if they wish, if they will, they will do. They think, "The moment I will it, I +will do. The only reason I am not doing is because I am not willing it just now." + +But no one feels helpless. If someone says that through the grace of the master it can +happen, you think you are ready just this very moment. If it is a question of doing +something, you say you can do it whenever you want, but if it is a question of grace you +say, "Okay! If it can be received from someone, I can receive it this very moment." + +You are not helpless, you are just lazy, and there is a great difference. In laziness no +grace can be received - only in helplessness. And helplessness is not part of laziness. +Helplessness comes only to those who first make every effort to reach, to penetrate, to +do. + +When you have done everything and nothing happens, you feel helpless. Only then can +you surrender to someone. Then your surrendering will become a technique. + +That is the last of techniques, but people try it first. That is the last, the ultimate. When +nothing happens by doing, if there is only helplessness and helplessness and helplessness, +if you lose all hope and your ego is shattered, then you know that nothing can be done +alone. Then your hand reaches to the feet of a master. It is a different type of reach: you +are helplessly searching for him, your whole being moves to his feet. You become just a +womb to receive. + +Then the grace is available. It has never been unavailable; it is always available. In every +age, in every period, there are enlightened persons. But unless you are ready to lose +yourself, you will not be in contact with him. You may be just sitting behind him or just +sitting by the side of him, but there will be no contact. + +There are three types of distances. One distance is of space. You are sitting there, I am +sitting here, and there is space between the two points. This is a distance in space. You +can come near and the distance will be less. You can just touch me and the distance is +lost - but only in space. + +There is a second type of distance - in time. Your beloved has died, your friend has died. +In space one point has disappeared completely; there is infinite distance. + +But in time, you will feel your friend just nearby. You close your eyes, and the friend is +there. In time it may be that the person who is sitting by your side is more distant than +your beloved who is no more in the world. The beloved is dead — then by and by, by and +by, there will be a greater distance of time. People say time heals. When that time is very, +very, very distant, the memory becomes more and more faint, and it disappears. + +A third distance exists a third dimension which is love. If you are in love with someone, +then he be may be on another star, but in your love he is just near you. He may have died, +there may be centuries of distance between you and him, but in love there is no distance. +Someone can be near Buddha just now. Twenty-five centuries means nothing because the +distance is of love. In space there is no Buddha now; the body has disappeared. In time +there is a distance of twenty-five centuries, but in love there is no distance. If someone is + + + +in love with Buddha, time and space distances disappear. He is just here, and you can +receive his grace. + +You may be just sitting by the side of a Buddha. There is no gap as far as space is +concerned; there is no distance as far as time is concerned. But if there is no love, then +there is infinite distance. So someone may have lived with Buddha without being in +contact, and someone may be just here now who is in contact with Buddha. + + +Grace happens in the dimension of love. For love everything is always eternally present. +So if you are in love, grace can happen. But love is surrendering; love means now the +other has become more important than yourself. Now for the other’s life, you are ready to +die. For the other to live, you will sacrifice yourself. The other has become the center; +you are just the periphery. By and by you disappear completely, and the other remains. In +that right moment, grace is received. + +So do not think of a master as one who can give you grace. Think of becoming a helpless +disciple - totally surrendered, in love. The master will come to you. When the disciple is +ready, the master always comes. It is not a question of physical presence; when you are +ready, from an unknown dimension of love, grace happens. But do not think about grace +as an escape. + +Because I am talking about so many techniques, I know there are two possibilities: you +may try some, or you may just become confused, and the latter is more possible. With +one hundred and twelve techniques, listening to one and then another and then another +continually, you will become confused. You will think it is beyond you — so many +techniques, so what to do and what not to do? + +It may come to your mind that," It is better to receive grace - GURUKRIPA — than to go +into this jungle-like world of techniques. + +This is very complex, so it is easier to receive grace." But that will not happen to you if +this is your way of thinking. Try these techniques, and try honestly. If you are a failure, +then that very failure will become your surrender. That is the ultimate technique. + +Okay? + + +THE END. + + + +Chapter 19: A Technique for the intellectual and a technique for the feeling type + + +SUTRAS: + +4. SUPPOSE YOU ARE GRADUALLY BEING DEPRIVED OF STRENGTH OR OF +KNOWLEDGE. AT THE INSTANT OF DEPRIVATION, TRANSCEND. + +5. DEVOTION FREES. + +For tantra, man himself is the disease. It is not that your mind is disturbed — rather, your +mind is the disturbance. It is not that you are tense within, but rather, you are the tension. +Understand the distinction clearly. If the mind is ill then the illness can be treated, but if +the mind itself is the illness, then this illness cannot be treated. It can be transcended, but +it cannot be treated. That makes the basic difference between Western psychology, and +Eastern tantric and yogic psychology; that is the difference between Eastern tantra and +yoga, and Western psychology. + +Western psychology thinks that the mind can be healthy, the mind as it is can be treated +and helped — because for Western thinking there is no transcendence, as there is nothing +beyond mind. Transcendence is possible only if there is something beyond, so that you +can live in your present state and move further. But if there is no beyond and the mind is +the end, then transcendence is impossible. + +If you think you are just a body, then you cannot transcend your body - because who will +transcend and to where will you transcend? If you are simply the body, then you cannot +go beyond the body. If you can go beyond the body, that means you are not simply the +body, but something plus. + +That "plus" becomes the dimension to move into. + +Similarly, if you are just the mind and nothing else, then no transcendence is possible. +Then we can treat individual diseases... Someone is mentally ill — we can treat the +illness. We will not touch the mind, but we will treat the illness and make the mind +nonnal. And no one will think about whether the normal mind itself is healthy or not. + +The normal mind is just a sceptical mind. Freud says that as everyone is, we can only +bring a diseased mind to normality. But whether everyone is healthy or not, that question +cannot be raised. We take it for granted that the collective mind, the average mind, is +okay. So whenever someone goes beyond that average mind, moves somewhere else, he +has to be brought back and readjusted. Thus, the whole of Western psychology has been +an effort toward readjustment - readjustment to the ordinary mind, the average mind. + +In this sense, there are thinkers, particularly one very intelligent thinker, Geoffrey, who +says that genius is a disease because genius is abnonnal. If normality is health, then +genius is disease. A genius is not nonnal; he is in a certain way mad. His madness may +be useful, so we allow him to live. + +An Einstein or a Van Gogh or an Ezra Pound - poets, painters, scientists, mystics - they +are mad, but their madness is allowed for two reasons: either their madness is hannless or +their madness is utilitarian. + +Through their madness they contribute something which nonnal minds cannot contribute. +Because they are mad they have moved to one extreme, and they can see certain things +that the normal mind cannot see. So we can allow these madmen - and we even make +them Nobel laureates. But they are ill. + + + +If normality is the criterion and the standard of health, then everyone who is not normal +is ill. Geoffrey says that a day will come when we will treat scientists and poets in the +same way we treat madmen: we will make them readjust to the average mind. This +attitude is because of a particular hypothesis that mind is the end and there is no beyond. +Just opposite to this attitude is the Eastern approach. We say here that mind itself is the +disease. So whether normal or abnormal, we will make only the distinction of "normally +ill" and "abnormally ill." A normal men is normally ill. He is not so much ill that you can +detect it, he is just average. Because everyone else is like him, his illness cannot be +detected. Even the person, the psychoanalyst who treats him, is himself a normally ill +person. Mind itself is the disease for us. + +Why? Why call mind itself the disease? We will have to approach it from a different +dimension, then it will be easy. For us, the body is death; for the Eastern approach, the +body is death. So you cannot create a perfectly healthy body; otherwise it will not die. + +You can create a certain balance, but the body as such, because it is going to die, is prone +to be ill. So health can only be a relative thing. The body cannot be perfectly healthy — it +cannot be. + +That is why medical science has no standard and no definition of what health is. They can +define diseases, they can define a particular disease, but they cannot define what health +is. Or at the most they can only define negatively that when a person is not ill, not +particularly ill, he is healthy. But to define health in a negative way looks absurd, because +then disease becomes the primary thing by which you define health. But health cannot be +defined, because really, the body can never be really healthy. Every moment the body is +only in a relative balance, because death is progressing with life; you are dying also. You +are not simply alive, you are dying simultaneously. + +Death and life are not two ends far away from each other. They are like two legs +simultaneously walking - and they both belong to you. This very moment you are alive +and dying both. Something is dying within you every moment. Within a span of seventy +years, death will reach the goal. Every moment you will go on dying and dying and +dying, and then you will die. + +The day you were born you started dying. The birthday is also the death-day. If you are +dying continuously - and death is not something which will come from without, but +something which will grow within - then the body can never be really healthy. + +How can it be? When it is dying every moment, how can it be really healthy? It can only +be relatively healthy. So if you are normally healthy, it is enough. + +It is the same with the mind. The mind cannot be really healthy, whole, because the very +existence of the mind is such that it is bound to remain diseased, ill at ease, tense, anxious +in anxiety. The very nature of the mind is such, so we will have to understand what is this +nature. + +Three things... One, mind is a link between the body and the no-body which is within +you. It is a link between the material and the non-material within you. It is one of the +most mysterious bridges. It bridges two quite contradictory things - matter and spirit. + +If you can, conceive the paradox. Usually you make a bridge over a river where both the +banks are material. In this case, mind is the bridge between one bank which is material +and the other which is non-material... between the visible and the invisible, between the +dying and the non-dying, between life and death, between body and spirit - or whatsoever +you name these two banks. Because mind bridges such contradictory things, it is bound + + + +to remain tense; it cannot be at ease. + +It is always moving from the visible to the invisible, from the invisible to the visible. +Every moment the mind is in deep tension. It has to bridge two things which cannot be +bridged. + +That is the tension, that is the anxiety. You are every moment in anxiety. + +I am not talking about your financial anxiety or other such anxieties — they are boundary +anxieties, frame anxieties. The real anxiety is not that, the real anxiety is that of the +buddha. You are also in that anxiety, but you are so much burdened by your day-to-day +anxieties, you cannot discover your basic anxiety. Once you find your basic anxiety, you +will become religious. + +Religion is a concern for the basic anxiety. Buddha became anxious in a different way. + +He was not worried about finance, he was not worried about a beautiful wife, he was not +worried about anything. There was no worry; ordinary worries were not there. He was +secure, safe, the son of a great king, the husband of a very beautiful wife, and everything +was available. The moment he desired anything he would get it. All that was possible was +possible for him. + +But suddenly he became anxiety-ridden - and that anxiety was a basic anxiety, a primary +anxiety. He saw a dead man being carried away, and he asked his chariot driver what had +happened to this man. The driver said, "This man is dead now. He has died." This was +Buddha's first encounter with death, so he asked immediately, "Is everyone prone to +death? Am I also going to die?" + +Look at the question. You may not have asked it. You may have asked who has died, +why he has died, or you might have said that he looks too young and this is not the age to +die. + +Those anxieties are not basic; they are not concerned with you. You may have felt +sympathetic, you may have felt sad, but still that is just on the circumference - and you +will have forgotten within a few moments. + +Buddha turned the whole question toward himself and he asked, "Am I going to die?" + +The chariot driver said, "I cannot lie to you. Everyone is prone to death, everyone is +going to die." Buddha said, "Then turn back the chariot. If I am going to die, then what is +the use of life? You have created a deep anxiety in me. Unless this anxiety is resolved, I +cannot be at ease." + +What is this anxiety? It is a basic anxiety. So if you become aware of the very basic +situation of life - of body, of mind — a subtle anxiety will creep in, and then that anxiety +will continue to tremble within you. Whatsoever you are doing or not doing, the anxiety +will be there - a deep anguish. The mind is bridging an abyss, an impossible abyss. The +body is going to die, and you have something - X - within you which is deathless. + +These are two contradictions. It is as if you are standing in two boats which are moving +in opposite directions. Then you will be in a deep conflict. That conflict is the conflict of +the mind. The mind is between two opposites: — that is one thing. + +Secondly, mind is a process, not a thing. Mind is not a thing:, it is a process. The word +mind is a false notion. + +When we say "mind," it appears as if there is something like a mind within you. There is +nothing! Mind is not a thing, mind is a process. So it is better to call it "minding," not +mind. We have a word in Sanskrit, CHITTA, which means minding. Not mind, but + + + +minding - a process. + +A process can never be silent. A process will always be tense; a process means a turmoil. +And mind is always moving from the past to the future. The past goes on being a burden +on it, so it has to move into the future. This constant movement creates another tension +within you. If you become too much conscious about it, you may go mad. + +So that is why we are always engaged in something or other; we do not want to be +unoccupied. If you are unoccupied, then you will become conscious of the inner process, +of the minding, and that will give you very strange and peculiar tensions. So everyone +wants to be occupied in some way or other. If there is nothing else to do, one goes on +reading the same newspaper again and again. Why? Can you not sit silently? It is +difficult, because if you sit silently you become aware of the totally tense process within. +So everyone is in search of escapes. Alcohol can give that — you become unconscious. +Sex can give that — for a moment you forget yourself completely. Television can give +that, music can give that... anything where you can forget yourself and become occupied +so much that for the time being you are as if you are not. + +This constant escaping from oneself is really because of this process of minding. If you +are unoccupied — and unoccupied-ness means meditation — if you are totally unoccupied, +you will become aware of your inner processes. And mind is the basic process within. +That is why so many people come to me and say they have come to meditate, but when +they start meditating they become more tense. They say, "We were not so tense before +and we were not so worried before. Ordinarily the whole day we are not so much +worried, but when we sit down quietly and start meditating, thoughts rush upon us; they +crowd in." That is something new so they think it is because of meditation that thoughts +are crowding them. + +It is not because of meditation. Thoughts are crowding you every moment of your +existence, but you are so occupied outwardly, you cannot be conscious of it. Whenever +you sit down you become conscious, you become conscious of something you have been +escaping constantly. Mind, minding, is a process, and a process is an effort. Energy is +wasted in it, dissipated in it. It is necessary; it is needed for life, it is part of the struggle +for survival. It is a weapon - and one of the most violent weapons. + +That is why man could survive over other animals. The animals are more strong +physically, but they lack a subtle weapon - minding. They have dangerous teeth, +dangerous nails; they are more powerful than man; they can instantly kill a man +completely. + +But they lack one weapon - minding. Because of that weapon, man could kill, survive. + +So the mind is a survival measure. It is needed; it is necessary, and it is violent. The mind +is violent, it is part of the long violence man has had to pass through. It has been built +through violence. So whenever you sit down, you will feel inner violence — thoughts +rushing, violent thoughts, a turmoil, as if you are going to explode. That is why no one +wants to sit silently. + +Everyone comes and says, "Give me some support, some inner support. I cannot just sit +silently. Give me a name that I can repeat like 'Ram, Ram, Ram...’ Give me a name that I +can repeat; then I can be silent." Really, what are you doing? You are creating a new +occupation. Then you can be silent because the mind is still occupied. Now you are +focused on "Ram, Ram, Ram..." on chanting; the mind is still not unoccupied. The mind as +a process is bound to be always ill; it cannot be so balanced as silence needs. + + + +Thirdly, mind is created from without. When you are born you have just the capacity for +mind, but no mind - just a possibility, a potentiality. So if a child is brought up without +society, without a society, the child will grow, he will have a body, but not a mind. He +will not be able to speak any language; he will not be able to think in concepts. He will +be like any animal. + +Society trains your capacity into an actuality, it gives you a mind. + +That is why a Hindu has a certain mind and a Mohammedan has a different mind. Both +are men, but their minds are different. A Christian has a different mind... These minds are +different because different societies have cultivated them with different purposes, +different goals. + +A child, a boy, is born, or a girl is born — they do not have minds, they have only the +possibility that the mind can sprout. It can be there, but it is not there; it is just a seed. +Then you train them. Then a boy becomes one mind and a girl becomes a different mind, +because you teach them differently. Then a Hindu becomes different and a Mohammedan +becomes different. Then a theist is different and an atheist is different. These minds are +brought up in you. They are conditioned, forced upon you. + +Because of this, mind as such is always old and orthodox. There can be no progressive +mind. This statement may look strange: There can be no progressive mind. Mind is +orthodox because it is a conditioning. So these so-called progressives are as much +orthodox about their progressiveness as any orthodox person. Look at a communist. He +thinks he is very progressive, but Marx's Das Capital is just as authoritative upon him as +the Koran on any Mohammedan, or the Gita on any Hindu. And if you start criticizing +Marx, the communist feels as much hurt as any Jain will feel if you start criticizing +Mahavir. + +Mind is orthodox because it is conditioned by the past, by the society, by others, for +certain purposes. + +Why am I making you aware of this fact? Because life changes every moment and mind +belongs to the past. Mind is always old and life is always new. There is bound to be +tension and conflict. + +A new situation arises... You fall in love with a woman, and you have a Hindu mind and +the woman is Mohammedan. Now there will be conflict. Now there is going to be much +anguish unnecessarily. The woman is Mohammedan, and life has brought you to a +situation where you fell in love with her. Now life gives you a new phenomenon, and +mind does not know how to deal with it. There is no know-how, so there will be conflict. +That is why, in a very changing world, people become uprooted; their lives become +anxious. This was not so in past ages. Man was more silent - not so really, but he +appeared more silent because the state of affairs around him was so static and the mind +was not in much conflict. Now everything is changing so fast, and the mind cannot +change so fast. Mind clings to the past, and everything changes every moment. + +That is why there is so much anxiety in the West. In the East there is less anxiety. This is +strange because the East has to face more basic problems. Food is not there, clothes are +not there, houses are not there; everyone is just starved. + +But they are in less anxiety, and the West is in more anxiety. The West is affluent, +scientifically and technologically developed, with a higher state of living so why so much +anxiety? Because technology gives life such a rapid change that the mind cannot cope + + + +with it. Before you are adjusted to a new thing, the new has become old and has changed. +Again the gap! Life is bringing about new situations, and the mind always tries to react +with the old conditioning. That gap goes on growing. The more the gap will be there, the +more will be the anxiety. Mind is orthodox and life is not orthodox. + +These are reasons why mind itself is the disease. So what to do? If you are going to treat +the mind, there are easy ways. Psychoanalysis is easy. It may take a long time, it may not +succeed, but still it is not difficult. But this transcendence of the mind is difficult, +arduous, because you have to leave the mind completely. You have to take wing and go +beyond, and leave the mind as it is — do not touch it. + +For example, I am here and the room is hot. I can do two things. I can air-condition the +room, but I continue to live in the room. I can go on making arrangements so that the +room is not hot, but then every arrangement has to be looked after and then every +arrangement creates its own anxieties and problems. There is another possibility: I can +leave the room and go out. + + +This is the difference. The West goes on living in the same room of the mind, trying to +adjust, to make arrangements, so that living in the mind becomes at least normal. It may +not be very blissful, but it becomes less and less unhappy. It may not reach a point, a +peak of happiness, but one is saved from much suffering; there is less and less suffering. +Freud has said that there is no possibility for man to be happy. At the most, if you can +arrange your mind in such a way that you are nonnal, you will be less unhappy than +others, that is all. This is very hopeless. But Freud is a very genuine, authentic thinker, +and his insight is right in a way because he cannot see beyond the mind. + +That is why the East has not really developed any psychology comparable to Freud, Jung +or Adler. And that is strange because the East has been talking about the mind for at least +five thousand years. + +With five thousand years of talking about mind, meditation, going beyond, why couldn’t +the East create psychology? Psychology is a very recent development in the West. Why +couldn’t the East create a psychology? Buddha was here who talked about the deepest +layers of the mind. He talked about the conscious, he talked about the subconscious, he +talked about the unconscious. He must have known. But why couldn’t he develop +psychologies about the conscious, subconscious and unconscious? + +The reason is this: the East has not been interested in the room. + +It talks about the room a little in order to go beyond, to go out. We have been interested +in the room just to find the door; that is all. We are not interested in details about the +room; we are not going to live in it. So the only interest has been in knowing where the +door is and how to go out. We have talked about the room only so that the door can be +located - so that we can know how to open it and go out. + +This has been our whole interest. That is why psychology could not be developed in +India. If you are not interested in this room, you will not make maps of the room; you +will not measure every wall and every inch of space. You are not bothered about these +things. You are only interested in where the door is, where the window is, so that you can +jump out. And the moment you are out you will forget the room completely, because then +you are under the great infinite sky. You will not even remember that there was a room +and you lived in a cave, while all the time the infinite sky was beyond — and you could +have moved out at any moment. You will forget the room completely. If you can go + + + +beyond the mind, what happens? The mind remains the same, you do not make any +change in the mind, but you go beyond it and everything changes. + +Then you can come back to the room again if you need to, but you will be a different +person. This going out and coming in will have made you qualitatively different. + +A man who has been living in a room, and who has not known what it is like on the +outside, is not really a man: he lives like a beetle, he lives like an insect. When he moves +out to the sky - the open sky - and to the sun and the clouds and the infinite expanse, he +becomes different immediately. This impact of the infinite makes him for the first time a +man, a consciousness. + +Now he can move into the room again, but he will be a different man. Now the room can +only be something which is used. It is not now a prison; he can move out any moment. +Then the room becomes just something to be used, something utilitarian. Previously he +was imprisoned in it; now he is not imprisoned. He is now a master, and he knows the +sky is outside and the infinite is awaiting him. And even this room is part of that infinite +now, even this small, limited sky and space within the room is the space, the same space +which is outside. The man comes in again and lives in the room, uses the room, but now +he is not imprisoned in it. This is a qualitative change. + +The East is concerned with how to go beyond the mind and then use it. Do not be +identified with the mind — that is the message. And all the techniques of meditation are +concerned only about how to find the door, how to use the key, how to unlock the door +and go out. + +We will discuss two methods today. The first is concerned with stopping in the middle of +an activity. + +We discussed three stop methods before; now this one remains. + +The fourth method: + +SUPPOSE YOU ARE GRADUALLY BEING DEPRIVED OF STRENGTH OR OF +KNOWLEDGE. AT THE INSTANT OF DEPRIVATION, TRANSCEND. + +You can do it in an actual situation or you can imagine a situation. For example: lie +down, relax, and feel as if your body is going to die. Close your eyes; start feeling that +you are dying. Soon you will feel that your body is becoming heavy. Imagine: "I am +dying, I am dying, I am dying." If the feeling is authentic, the body will start becoming +heavy; you will feel as if your body has become like lead. You want to move your hand, +but you cannot move; it has become so heavy and dead. Go on feeling that you are dying, +dying, dying, dying, dying, and when you feel that now the moment has come — just a +jump and you will be dead — then suddenly forget your body and transcend. + +SUPPOSE YOU ARE GRADUALLY BEING DEPRIVED OF STRENGTH OR OF +KNOWLEDGE. AT THE INSTANT OF DEPRIVATION, TRANSCEND. When you +feel that the body is dead, what is meant now by transcending? Look at the body. Up to +now you were feeling that you are dying; now the body has become a dead weight. Look +at the body. Forget that you are dying and now be the observer. The body is lying dead +and you are looking at it. There will be a transcendence. You will be out of your mind, +because a dead body needs no mind. + +A dead body relaxes so much that the very process of the mind stops. You are there and +the body is there, but the mind is absent. Remember, mind is needed for life, not for + + + +death. + +If suddenly you come to know that within an hour you will die, what will you do in that +hour? One hour left, and it is certain that you are going to die after one hour - exactly +after one hour. What will you do? Your thinking will drop completely because the whole +of thinking is concerned with either the past or the future. + +You were planning to purchase a house or to purchase a car, or you were planning to +marry someone or divorce someone. You were thinking many things, and they were +constantly on your mind. Now, with only one hour more, there is no meaning in marriage +and no meaning in divorce. Now you can leave all the planning to others, who are going +to live. With death planning ceases, with death worrying ceases, because every worry is +life-oriented. + +You have to live tomorrow; that is why there is worry. So all those who have been +teaching meditation to the world have always been saying: do not think of tomorrow. +Jesus says to his disciples, "Do not think of the tomorrow," because if you think of the +tomorrow you cannot go into meditation. Then you move into worries. But we are so +fond of worries that not only do we think of the tomorrow, we think of the other life. So +we plan not only for this life, we plan for the other life, beyond death, also. + + +One day I was passing through a street and someone gave me a pamphlet. A very +beautiful house was painted on the cover and a very beautiful garden. It was lovely - +divinely lovely. And in very big capital letters was the question: "Do you want such a +beautiful house and such a beautiful garden? And without any price, without any cost — +for free?" I turned it over. The house was not of this earth. It was a Christian pamphlet, +and it read, "If you want such a beautiful house and such a beautiful garden, believe in +Jesus. Those who believe in him will get such houses free of cost in the kingdom of +God." + +The mind goes on not only thinking of tomorrow, but thinking of beyond death, +arranging and making reservations for the afterlife. Such a mind cannot be a religious +mind. A religious mind cannot think of tomorrow. So those who think of the afterlife are +constantly worried about whether God will behave rightly with them or not. + +Churchill was dying and someone asked him, "Are you ready to meet the Father there in +heaven?" Churchill said, "That is not my worry. I am constantly worried whether the +divine Father is ready to meet me." + +But either way one goes on worrying about the future. Buddha said, "There is no heaven +and no afterlife." And he said, "There is no soul, and your death will be total and +complete; nothing will survive." People thought he was an atheist. + +He was not, he was just trying to create a situation in which you can forget the tomorrow +and can remain in this very moment, here and now. Then meditation follows very easily. +So if you are thinking of death — not the death which will come, or is to come later — fall +down on the ground and he dead. Relax and feel, "I am dying, I am dying, I am dying." +And not only think it, feel it in every limb of the body, in every fib of the body. Let death +creep in. It is one of the most beautiful meditations. When you feel that the body is a +dead weight and you cannot move your hand, you cannot move your head and everything +has become dead, suddenly look at your own body. + +Mind will not be there. You can look! You will be there; consciousness will be there. +Look at your body — it will not look like yours, it will be just a body. The gap between + + + +you and the body will be clear - crystal clear. There will be no bridge. The body is lying +dead and you are there standing as a witness, not in it — NOT in it! + +Remember, the feeling that you are in the body is because of the mind. This feeling that +you are in the body is because of the MIND! If the mind is not there, if it is absent, you +will not say you are in the body or out of the body. You will simply be there, no in or out. +"In" and "out" are both relative terms associated with the mind. Simply, you will be there +witnessing. + +This is transcendence. You can do it in many ways. + +Sometimes it is possible in actual situations... You are ill and you are feeling that there is +no hope, you are going to die. This is a very useful situation. Use it for meditation. You +can try it in other ways also. Suppose you are gradually being deprived of strength. Lie +down and feel as if the whole existence is sucking your strength out. You are being +sucked from everywhere — your strength is being sucked. Soon you will be impotent, +completely devoid of strength. Your energy is flowing out, being taken out. Soon nothing +will be left inside. That is how life is: you are being sucked out, everything that is around +you is sucking you out. One day you will be just a dead cell; everything will have been +sucked out. The life will have flown out of you, and only the dead body will remain +there. + +Even this very moment you can do it. Imagine this: lie down and feel that the energy is +being sucked out. Within a few days you will have the knack of how energy goes out. + +And when you feel that everything has moved out, nothing is now left within you, +TRANSCEND: AT THE INSTANT OF DEPRIVATION, TRANSCEND. When the last +quantum of energy is leaving you, transcend. Be an onlooker; just become a witness. + +Then this universe and this body, both, are not you. You are looking at the phenomenon. +This transcendence will bring you out of the mind. + +This is the key. And you can do it in many ways, whatsoever is your liking. For example, +we were talking about a run around. Exhaust yourself; go on running and running and +running. Do not stop by yourself, let the body fall. When every fib is exhausted, you will +fall down. When you are falling down, become aware. Just look and see that the body is +falling down. Sometimes a very miraculous happening happens. You remain standing and +the body has fallen down, and you can look at it. You can look, as only the body has +fallen down and you are still standing. Do not fall with the body. Roam around, run, +dance, exhaust the body — but remember, you are not to lie down. Then the inner +consciousness also moves with the body and lies down. + +You are not to lie down, you just go on doing it until the body falls by itself. Then it falls +like a dead weight. Immediately, you feel the body is falling and you cannot do anything. +Open your eyes, be alert, do not miss the point. Be alert and see what is happening. You +may be still standing, and the body has fallen down. And once you know it, you can +never forget that you are different from the body. + +This "standing out" is the real meaning of the English word ecstasy. Ecstasy means to +stand out. And once you can feel you are out of the body, there is no mind in that +moment, because mind is the bridge that gives you the feeling that you are in the body. + +If you are out of the body for a single moment, there will be no mind in that moment. + +This is transcendence. Then you can move in the body, then you can move in the mind, +but now you cannot forget the experience . That experience has become part and parcel + + + +of your being; it will be there always. Go on doing it every day, and many things happen +through such a simple process. + +The West is always worried about how to tackle mind, and it tries to find many ways. But +still, nothing works or seems to work. Everything becomes a fashion and then dies. Now +psychoanalysis is a dead movement. New movements are there - encounter groups, group +psychology, action psychology and many other things - but just like a fashion they come +and go. Why? Because within mind, at the most you can only make arrangements. They +will be disturbed again and again. Making arrangements with the mind is making a house +on sand, or making a house of playing cards. It is always wavering, and the fear is always +there that now it is going. At any moment it may not be there. + +Going beyond the mind is the only way to be inwardly happy and healthy, to be whole. +Then you can move in the mind and use the mind, but the mind becomes the instrument +and you are not identified with it. So two things. Either you are identified with the mind +— this is illness for tantra — or you are not identified with the mind. + +Then you use it as an instrument, and then you are healthy and whole. + +The fifth technique is very simple in one sense and the most difficult in another, and it is +only of two words. The fifth technique says, DEVOTION FREES. + +Just two words: DEVOTION FREES. It is simply one word really, because FREES is the +consequence of devotion. What is meant by devotion? In VI GY ANA BHAIRAVA +TANTRA, there are two types of techniques. One is for those who are intellectually +oriented, scientifically oriented, and another is for those who are heart oriented, emotion +oriented, poetically oriented. And there are only two types of minds: the scientific mind +and the poetic mind - and these are poles apart. They meet nowhere, and they cannot +meet. Sometimes they run parallel, but still, there is no meeting. + +Sometimes it happens in a single individual that he is a poet and a scientist. Rarely, but +sometimes it happens that he is both a poet and a scientist. Then he has a split +personality. He is really two persons, not one. When he is a poet, he forgets the scientist +completely; otherwise the scientist will be disturbing. And when he is a scientist, he has +to forget the poet completely and move into another world with another arrangement of +concepts - ideas, logic, reason, mathematics. + +When he moves to the world of poetry, the mathematics is no more there — music is +there. + +Concepts are no more there: words are there - but liquid, not solid. One word flows into +another, and one word can mean many things or it may not mean anything. The grammar +is lost; only the rhythm remains. It is a different world. + +Thinking and feeling - these are the two types, basic types. The first technique I taught +was for a scientific mind. The second technique, DEVOTION FREES, is for a feeling +type. Remember to find out your type. And no type is higher or lower. Do not think that +the intellectual type is higher or the feeling type is higher - no! They are simply types. No +one is higher or lower. So just think factually what is your type. + +This second technique is for the feeling type. Why? Because devotion is toward +something else and devotion is a blind thing. In devotion the other becomes more +important than you. It is a trust. The intellectual cannot trust anybody; he can only +criticize. He cannot trust. He can doubt, but he cannot trust And if sometimes some +intellectual comes to trust, it is never authentic. First he tries to convince himself about + + + +his trust; it is never authentic. He finds proofs, arguments, and when he is satisfied that +the arguments help, the proofs help, then he trusts. But he has missed the point, because +trust is not argumentative and trust is not based on proofs. If proofs are there, then there +is no need of trust. + +You do not believe in the sun, you do not believe in the sky — you know. + +How can you believe in the sun rising? If someone asks what is your belief about the sun +rising, you do not have to say, "I believe in it. I am a great believer." You say, "The sun +is rising and I know it." No question of belief or disbelief. Is there someone who +disbelieves in the sun? There is no one. Trust means a jump into the unknown without +any proofs. + +It is difficult - difficult for the intellectual type, because the whole thing becomes absurd, +foolish. First proofs must be there. If you say, "There is a God. Surrender yourself to +God," first God has to be proven. But then God becomes a theorem - of course proven, +but useless. God must remain unproven; otherwise he is of no use, because then trust is +meaningless. If you believe in a proven God, then your God is just a theorem of +geometry. No one believes in the theorems of Euclid — there is no need, they can be +proven. That which can be proven cannot be made a basis of trust. + +One of the most mysterious Christian saints, Tertullian, said, "I believe in God because +he is absurd." That is right. That is the attitude of the feeling type. He says, "Because he +cannot be proven, that is why I believe in him." This statement is illogical, irrational, +because a logical statement must be like this: "These are the proofs of God; therefore I +believe in him." And he says, "Because there are no proofs, and no argument can prove +that God is, therefore I believe in him." + +And he is right in a way, because trust means a jump into the unknown without any +reasons. Only a feeling type can do that. + +Forget devotion, first understand love; then you will be able to understand devotion. You +fall in love. Why do we say "falling in love"? Nothing falls - just your head. What falls in +love but your head? You fall down from the head. That is why we say "falling in love" - +because the language is created by intellectual types. For them love is a lunacy, love is +madness. ; one has fallen in love. It means, now you can expect anything from him... now +he is mad, now no reasoning will help, you cannot reason with him. Can you reason with +someone who is in love? People try. People try, but nothing can be proven. + +You have fallen in love with someone. Everyone says, "That person is not worthwhile," +or "You are entering a dangerous terrain," or "You are proving yourself foolish; you can +find a better partner." But nothing will help, no reasoning will help. You are in love — +now reason is useless. Love has its own reasoning. We say "falling in love." It means +now your behavior will be irrational. + +Look at two lovers, at their behavior, their communication. It becomes irrational. They +start using baby talk. Why? Even a great scientist, when he falls in love, will use baby +language. Why not use a highly developed, technological language? Why use this baby +talk? Because highly technological language is of no use. + + +One of my friends married a girl. The girl was Czechoslovakian. She did know a little +English, however, and this man knew a little Czechoslovakian; they got married. He was +a highly educated man, a professor in a university, and the girl was also a professor. But + + + +the man said to me — I was staying with him — "It is very difficult because I know only +technological Czech, technological terminology, and she also only knows technological +English, so we cannot have baby talk. So it is strange. Our love is just that somewhere on +the surface we feel; it cannot move deep. The language becomes the barrier. I can talk as +a professor — as far as my subject is concerned I can talk about it — , and she can talk +about her subject. But love has been neither of our's subject." + +So why do you fall into baby talk? Because that was your first love experience, with your +mother. Those words that you uttered first were love words. They were not head- +oriented, they came from the heart; they belonged to feeling. They had a different quality. +So even when you have a very developed language, when you love you again fall back — +you fall back into baby talk. Those words are different. They do not belong to this +category of the mind; they belong to the heart. They may not be so expressive, so +meaningful. Still, they are more expressive and more meaningful — but their meaning is +of a different dimension altogether. + +Only if you are very deeply in love will you fall silent. Then you cannot talk with your +beloved, or you can talk just by the way, but really, there is no talk. + +If the love goes deep, words become useless; you remain silent. If you cannot remain +silent with your beloved, know well there is no love - because it is very difficult to live in +silence with someone you are not in love with. With a stranger you immediately start +talking. When you are riding in a train or in a bus you immediately start talking, because +to sit by the side of a stranger silently is very difficult, awkward. There is no other bridge, +so unless you create a language bridge there is no bridge. + +No inner bridge is possible with that stranger. You are closed in yourself and he is closed +in himself, and two enclosures are just side by side. There is every fear of colliding and +of danger, so you create a bridge. You start talking about the weather or about anything, +any nonsense that gives a feeling that you are bridged and you are communicating. Two +lovers will fall silent, and when two lovers start talking again you can know well that the +love has disappeared; they have become strangers. + +So go and look... Wives and husbands, whenever they are alone, they will talk about +anything. And they both know, they both are aware that there is no need to talk, but it is +so difficult to remain silent. + +So anything, any trivia will do, but talk so that you can have the feeling that +communication is there. But two lovers will fall silent. Language will disappear because +language belongs to reason. First it will become a baby talk, and then this will disappear. +Then they will be silently in communication. What is their communication? It is +irrational. They feel attuned to a different dimension of existence, and they feel happy in +that attunement. And if you ask them to prove what is their happiness, they cannot prove +it. + +No lover has been able to prove up to now why he is happy in love. Why? Because love +implies much suffering. Still, lovers are happy. Love has a deep suffering, because when +you become one with someone it is always difficult. Two minds become one... it is not +only two bodies becoming one. That is the difference between sex and love. If only two +bodies become one, it is not very difficult and there is no suffering. It is one of the easiest +things; any animal can do it. It is easy. But when two people are in love it is very +difficult, because two minds have to dissolve, two minds have to be absent. Only then is +the space created, and love can flower. + + + +No one reasons about love; no one can prove that love gives happiness. No one can even +prove that love exists. And there are scientists, behaviorists, followers of Watson and +Skinner, who say love is just an illusion. + +There is no love; you are just in an illusion. You feel that you are in love, but there is no +love, you are just dreaming. And no one can prove they are wrong. They say that love is +just a hallucination, a psychedelic experience. Nothing real, just body chemistry +influencing you, just hormones, chemicals, influencing your behavior and giving a false +well-being to you. No one can prove them wrong. + +But the miracle is this, that even a Watson will fall in love. Even a Watson will fall in +love, knowing well that this is just a chemical affair. And even a Watson will be happy. +But love cannot be proven, it is so inner and subjective. What happens in love? The other +becomes important - more important than you. You become the periphery and he +becomes the center. + +Logic always remains self-centered, mind always remains ego-centered: I am the center +and everything just encircles around me — for me, but I am the center. This is how reason +works. If you move with reason too much, you will come to the conclusion to which +Berkeley came. He said, "Only I exist, everything else is just an idea in the mind. How +can I prove that you are there, sitting there just before me? How can I prove reasonably, +rationally, that you are really there? You may be just a dream. I may be just dreaming and +talking; you may not be there at all. How can I prove to myself that really you are there? I +can, of course, touch you, but I can touch you even in a dream. + +And even in a dream I feel it when I touch someone. I can hit you and you will scream, +but even in a dream, if I hit someone the dream figure screams. So how can I make a +distinction that my audience here, just now, is not a dream but a reality? It may be just a +fiction." + +Go to a madhouse, and you will find people sitting alone talking. To whom are they +talking? I may be talking to no one. How can I prove rationally that you are really here? +So if reason goes to the extreme, to the very logical extreme, then only I remain and +everything else becomes a dream. This is how reason works. + +Quite the contrary is the path of the heart. I become the mystery and you — thou, the +other, the beloved — become the real. If you move to the very extreme, then it becomes +devotion. If your love comes to such an extreme point that you forget completely that you +are, you have no notion of yourself and only the other remains, that is devotion. + +Love can become devotion. Love is the first step; only then can devotion flower. But for +us even love is a faraway reality, sex is the only real thing. Love has two possibilities: +either it falls into sex and becomes a bodily thing, or it rises into devotion and becomes a +thing of the spirit. Love is just in between. Just below it is the abyss of sex, and beyond it +is the open sky - the infinite sky of devotion. + +If your love grows deeper, the other becomes more and more significant - so significant +that you begin to call the other your god. + +That is why Meera goes on calling Krishna, God. No one can see Krishna, and Meera +cannot prove that Krishna is there, but she is not interested in proving it at all. She has +made that point, Krishna, her love object. And remember, whether you make a real +person your love object or whether it is just your imagination, it makes no difference, +because the whole transformation comes through devotion, not through the beloved - + + + +remember this. Krishna may not be there at all; it is irrelevant. For the lover, it is +irrelevant. + +For Radha, Krishna was there in reality. For Meera, Krishna was not there in reality. That +is why Meera is a greater devotee than Radha. And even Radha would become jealous of +Meera, because for Radha the real person was there. It is not so difficult to feel Krishna's +reality when he is present. But when Krishna is no more there, Meera alone is living in a +room and talking to Krishna, and living for him who is nowhere. For her, he is everything +and all. She cannot prove it; it is irrational. But she took a jump and she became +transformed. Devotion freed her. + +I want to emphasize the fact that it is not a question of whether Krishna is there or not. It +is not! This feeling that Krishna is there, this total feeling of love, this total surrender, this +losing oneself into one who may be or may not be, this LOSING itself is the +transfonnation. Suddenly one is purified - totally purified - because when the ego is not +there you cannot be impure in any way. + +Because ego is the seed of all impurity. + +The feeling of ego is the root of all madness. For the feeling world, for the world of the +devotee, ego is the disease. Ego dissolves, and it dissolves in only one way; there is no +other way. There is only one way: the other becomes so important, so significant, that by +and by you fade out and disappear. One day you are no more; just a consciousness of the +other remains. + +And when you are no more, the other is also not the other, because he is the other only +when you are there. When the "I" disappears, the "thou" also disappears. In love you take +the first step — the other becomes important. You remain, but for certain moments there +may be a peak when you are not. Those are rare peaks of love, but ordinarily you remain +and the lover is there. When the lover becomes more important than you, you can die for +him or her. If you can die for someone, there is love. The other has become the meaning +of your life. + +Only if you can die for someone can you live for someone. If you cannot die for +someone, you cannot live for someone. Life acquires a meaning only through death. In +love, the other has become important, but you are still there. In some higher peaks of +communication you may disappear, but you will come back; this will be only for +moments. So lovers have glimpses of devotion. That is why in India the beloved used to +call her lover her god. + +Only in peaks does the other become divine, and the other becomes divine only when you +are not. This can grow. And if you make it a SADHANA — a spiritual practice — if you +make it an inner search, if you are not just enjoying love but transforming yourself +through love, then it becomes devotion. + +In devotion you surrender yourself completely. And this surrender can be to a god who +may not be in the sky or who may be, or to a master who may not be awakened or who +may be, or to a beloved who may not be worthwhile or who may be — that is irrelevant. If +you can allow yourself to dissolve for the other, you will be transformed. + +Devotion frees. That is why we have glimpses of freedom only in love. When you are in +love, you have a subtle freedom. This is paradoxical because everyone else will see that +you have become a slave. If you are in love with someone, those around you will think +that you both have become slaves to each other. But you will have glimpses of freedom. +Love is freedom. Why? Because ego is the bondage; there is no other bondage. You may + + + +be in a prison and you cannot escape. If your beloved comes into the prison, the prison +disappears that very moment. The walls are there still, but they do not imprison you. Now +you can forget them completely. You can dissolve into each other and you can become +for each other a sky in which to fly. The prison has disappeared; it is no more there. + +And you may be under the open sky without love, totally free, untethered, but you are in +a prison because you have nowhere to fly. This sky will not do. + +Birds fly in that sky, but you cannot. You need a different sky - the sky of consciousness. +Only the other can give you that sky, the first taste of it. When the other opens for you +and you move into the other, you can fly. + +Love is freedom, but not total. If love becomes devotion, then it becomes total freedom. + +It means surrendering yourself completely. So those who are of the feeling type, this +sutrais for them: DEVOTION FREES. + +Take Ramakrishna... If you look at Ramakrishna you will think that he is just a slave to +the goddess Kali, to Mother Kali. He cannot do anything without her permission; he is +just like a slave. But no one was more free than him. When he was appointed for the first +time as priest in Dakshineshwar, at the temple, he started behaving strangely. The +committee, the trustees gathered, and they said, "Throw this man out. He is behaving +undevotionally." This happened because first he would smell a flower and then the flower +would be put at the feet of the goddess. That is against the ritual. A smelled flower +cannot be offered to the divine — it has become impure. + +First he would taste the food which was made for the offering, and then he would offer it. +And he was the priest so the trustees asked him, "What are you doing? This cannot be +allowed." + +He said, "Then I will leave this post. I will move out of the temple, but I cannot offer +food to my Mother without tasting it. My mother used to taste... whenever she would +prepare something, she would taste it first and then only would she give it to me. And I +cannot offer a flower without smelling it first. So I can go out, and you cannot stop me, +you cannot prevent me. I will go on offering it anywhere, because my Mother is +everywhere; she is not confined in your temple. So wherever I will be, I will be doing the +same thing." + +It happened that someone, some Mohammedan, told him, "If your Mother is everywhere, +then why not come to the mosque?" He said, "Okay, I am coming." He remained there for +six months. He forgot Dakshineshwar completely; he was in a mosque. Then his friend +said, "Now you can go back." He said, "She is everywhere." So one may think that +Ramakrishna is a slave, but his devotion is such that now the beloved is everywhere. + +If you are nowhere, the beloved will be everywhere. If you are somewhere, then the +beloved will be nowhere. + + +THE END. + + + +Chapter 20: Ordinary love and the love of a buddha + + +The first question: + +Question 1 + +IT SEEMS VERY DIFFICULT TO LOVE SOMEONE FOR TWENTY-FOUR HOURS +A DAY. WHY DOES IT HAPPEN SO? SHOULD LOVE BE A CONTINUOUS +PROCESS? AND AT WHICH STAGE DOES LOVE BECOME DEVOTION? + +Love is not an act; it is not something that you do. If you do it, it is not love. No doing is +involved in love; it is a state of being, not an act. No one can do anything continuously +for twenty-four hours. If you are doing love, then of course you cannot do it for twenty- +four hours. With any act you will get tired; with any act you get bored. And then, after +any act, you have to relax. So if you are doing love, you will have to relax into hate, +because you can relax only into the opposite. + +That is why our love is always mixed with hatred. You love this moment, and the next +moment you hate the same person. The same person becomes the object of both love and +hate; that is the conflict of lovers. Because your love is an act, that is why there is this +misery. + +So the first thing to be understood is that love is not an act; you cannot do it. You can be +in love, but you cannot "do" love. Doing is absurd. But other things are also implied. It is +not an effort because if it were an effort you would get tired. It is a state of mind. + +And do not think in terms of relationship, think in terms of states of mind. If you are in +love, this is a state of mind. + +This state of mind may be focused on one person or it may be unfocused - on the whole. +When it is focused on one person, it is known as love. When it becomes unfocused, it +becomes prayer. Then you are just in love - not with someone, but just in love, as you are +breathing. + +If breathing were an effort you would get tired of it, and you would have to relax and +then you would die. If it were an effort, then at some time you might forget to do it and +then you would die. Love is just like breathing: it is a higher plane of breathing. If you do +not breathe, your body will die. If you are not in love, your spirit cannot be born. + +So take love as a breathing of the soul. When you are in love your soul becomes vital, +alive, just like it is breathing. But think in this way. If I say to you, "Only breathe when +you are near me and do not breathe anywhere else," then you will die. And the next time +you will be near me you will be just dead and you will not even be able to breathe near +me. + +That has happened with love. We possess — the love object is possessed and the lover +says, "Don't love anybody else. Only love me." Then the love is atrophied and then the +lover cannot love, it becomes impossible. It doesn’t mean that you have to love everyone, +but you have to be in a loving state of mind. It is just like breathing: even if your enemy +is there you will breathe. + +That is the meaning of Jesus' saying, "Love your enemy." + +It has been a problem for Christianity, how to understand this saying, "Love your +enemy." It seems contradictory. But if loving is not an act, if it is just a state of mind, +then there is no question of enemy or friend. You are in love. + +Look at it from the other side. There are persons who are continuously in hate, and + + + +whenever they try to show love they have to make much effort. Their love is an effort +because their continuous state of mind is hate. That is why effort is needed. There are +persons who are continuously sad; then their laughter is an effort. They have to fight +against themselves. Then their laughter becomes a painted laughter - just false, imposed, +put together, not coming from deep within but just arranged, no spontaneity in it but just +artificial. + +There are persons who are continuously in anger - not angry at something or someone, +just angry. Then love becomes an effort. On the other hand, if love is your state of mind, +anger will be an effort. You can do it, but you cannot be angry. Then you will have to +create it artificially; it will be false. + +If a buddha tries to be angry, much effort will be needed, and then too it will be false. +And only those who do not know him can be deceived. Those who know him, they know +that that anger is false, just painted, created. It is not coming from within; that is +impossible. A Buddha, a Jesus, cannot hate. + +Then effort is needed. If they want to show hatred, then they will have to do it. + +But you do not need any effort to be hateful; you need effort to be loving. Change the +state of mind. How to change the state of mind? How to be loving? And it is not a +question of time, of how to be loving twenty-four hours a day. This is absurd — this +question is absurd. + +It is not a question of time. If you can be loving in a single moment that is enough, +because you never have two moments together. Only one moment is given. When one is +lost, a second is given. You have only one moment always with you. If you know how to +be loving in one single moment, you know the secret. You need not think about twenty- +four hours, or of the whole life. + +Only a single moment of love and you know how to fill a moment with love. Then the +second moment will be given to you, and you can fill that second moment also with love. +So remember, it is not a question of time. There is a question only of a single moment, +and a single moment is not part of time. A single moment is not a process; a single +moment is just now. + +Once you know how to enter a single moment with love, you have entered eternity: time +is no more. A buddha lives in the now; you live in time. Time means thinking of the past, +thinking of the future. And while you are thinking of the past and of the future, the +present is lost. + + +You are engaged with the future and the past, and the present is being lost - and the +present is the only existence. The past is no more and the future has yet to be: they both +are not, they are non-existential. This very moment, this single atomic moment, is the +only existence - here and now. If you know to be loving, you know the secret. And you +will never be given two moments together, so you need not bother about time. + +A single moment is always - and it is always in the shape of now. Remember, there are +not really two types of "nows." This single moment is the same; it doesn’t differ in any +way from the moment that has gone before it, and it doesn't differ in any way from the +moment that is going to follow it. + +This atomic now is always the same. That is why Eckhart says, "It is not that time passes. +Time remains the same. Rather, we go on passing." Pure time remains the same; we go +on passing. So do not think about twenty-four hours, and then you need not think of the + + + +present moment. + +One thing more. Thinking needs time; living doesn’t need time. You cannot think in this +very moment. In this very moment, if you want to be you will have to cease thinking, +because thinking is basically concerned with either the past or the future. Of what can +you think in the present? The moment you think, it has become the past. + +A flower is there — you say this is a beautiful flower. + +This saying is now no more in the present; it has become the past. When you come to +grasp something in thinking, it has become the past. In the present you can be, but you +cannot think. Y ou can be with the flower, but you cannot think about it. Thinking needs +time. + +So in another way, thinking is time. If you do not think, there is no time. That is why in +meditation you feel a timelessness. That is why in love you feel a timelessness. Love is +not thinking, it is a cessation of thought. You are! When you are with your beloved, you +are not thinking about love, you are not thinking about the beloved. You are not thinking +at all. And if you are thinking, then you are not with your beloved, you are somewhere +else. Thinking means absence from the now... you are not there. + +That is why those who are too much obsessed with thinking cannot love, because even +when they are there, even if they reach to the original divine source, even if they meet +God, they will go on thinking about him and they will miss him completely. You can go +on thinking about and about and about, but it is never the fact. + +A moment of love is a timeless moment. Then there is no question of thinking how to +love twenty-four hours. You never think about how to live twenty-four hours, how to be +alive twenty-four hours. Either you are alive or you are not. So the basic thing to be +understood is not time, but now - how to be here and now in a state of love. + + +Why is there hate? When you feel hatred, go to the cause of it. Only then can love flower. +When do you feel hatred? When you feel that your existence, your life, is in danger, +when you feel that your existence can be annihilated, suddenly hate surges in you. When +you feel that you can be destroyed, you start destroying others. That is a safety measure. + +It is just a part of you that is struggling for survival. Whenever you feel that your +existence is in danger, you are filled with hatred. + +So unless you come to feel that your existence cannot be in danger, that it is impossible +to annihilate you, you cannot be filled with love. A Jesus can be in love because he +knows something which is deathless. You cannot be in love because you know only that +which belongs to death. And every moment death is there; every moment you are afraid. +How can you love when you are afraid? Love cannot exist with fear. And fear is there, so +you can only create a make-believe that you love. + +And again, your love is really nothing but a safety measure. You love so that you will not +fear. Whenever you believe that you are in love, you are less afraid. For the moment you +can forget death. An illusion is created in which you can feel that you are accepted by the +existence; you are not denied, rejected. That is why there is so much need of love and of +being loved. + +Whenever you are being loved by someone, you create around you an illusion that you +are needed by the existence - at least by someone. + + +You are needed by someone, so you are not just futile. You are not just accidental — you + + + +are needed somewhere. Without you the existence will miss something. That gives you a +feeling of well-being. You feel a purpose, a destiny, a meaning, a worthiness. + +When you are not loved by anyone you feel rejected, you feel denied, you feel +meaningless. Then you feel there is no purpose, no destiny. If no one loves you and you +die, there will be no feeling of your absence, it will not be felt that you are no more. No +one will feel that you were, and now you are no more. + +Love gives you the feeling of being needed. That is why in love one becomes or feels less +afraid. Whenever love is not there you become more fearful, and in fear, as a protection, +you become hateful. Hate is a protection. You are afraid of being destroyed; you become +destructive. + +In love, you feel that you are accepted, welcome — not an uninvited guest, but rather that +you are invited, welcome, waited for, received, that the existence is happy that you are. +The one who loves you becomes the representative of the whole existence. But this love +is basically fear-based. You are protecting against fear, against death, against the +inhuman indifference of existence. + +Really, existence is indifferent - at least on the surface. The sun, the sea, the stars, the +earth, they are totally indifferent to you; no one is worried about you. + +And it is apparently clear that you are not needed. Without you everything will be as +good as it is with you; nothing will be lost. Look at the existence superficially: no one, +nothing, cares about you. They may not even be aware of you. The stars are not aware of +you; even the earth which you call Mother is not aware of you. And when you die, the +earth will not be sad. Nothing will have changed; things will be as they are and as they +always have been. With you or without you, there is no difference. + +You feel you are just an accident. You were not needed; uninvited you have come... just a +chance product. This creates fear. This is what Kierkegaard calls "anguish." There is a +subtle continuous fear — you are not needed. + +When someone loves you, you feel that a different dimension has come into existence. +Now at least one person will be there who will weep, who will feel sorry, who will be +sad. There will be tears; you will be needed. At least there will be one person who will +always feel your absence if you are not. At least for one you have gained a destiny, a +purpose. + +That is why there is so much need of love. And if you are not loved, you are uprooted. + +But this love is not the love I am talking about. This is a relationship and a mutual +creation of illusion - a mutual illusion: "I need you, you need me. I give you this illusion +that without you my purpose, my meaning, my life will be lost; you give me this illusion +that without me everything will be lost. + +So we both are helping each other to be in an illusion. We are creating one separate, +private existence in which we become meaningful, in which the whole indifference of +this vast space is forgotten." + +Two lovers live in each other; they have created a private world. That is why love needs +so much privacy. If you are not in privacy, the world goes on impinging upon you. It +goes on telling you that whatsoever you are doing is just a dream, and this is a mutual +illusion. Love needs privacy because then the whole world is forgotten. Only two lovers +exist, and the indifference, the total indifference of existence, is forgotten. You feel +loved, welcomed. Without you nothing will be the same. At least in this private world +nothing will be the same without you.Life is meaningful. + + + +I am not talking about this love. This is really illusory. It is a cultivated illusion, and man +is so weak that he cannot live without this illusion. Those who can, they live without this +illusion. A buddha can live without this illusion, and then he will not create it. + +When it becomes possible to live illusion-lessly - to live without illusion — a second, a +different dimension of love comes into being. It is not that one person needs you. It is +coming to understand, to realize that you are not different from this existence which +looks so indifferent. You are part of it, organically one with it. + +And if a tree is flowering, it is not separate from you. You have flowered in the tree and +the tree has become conscious in you. + +The sea and the sand and the stars, they are one with you. You are not an island, you are +organically one with this universe. The whole universe is within you and the whole of +you is in this universe. Unless you come to know it and feel it and realize it, you will not +get that love which is a state of mind. + +If you come to realize this, you will not need to create a private illusion that someone +loves you. Then there is meaning, and if no one loves you, no meaning is lost. Then you +are not afraid at all because even death will not annihilate you. It may annihilate the +form, it may annihilate the body, but it cannot annihilate you because you are the +existence. + +This is what happens in meditation. This is for what meditation is meant. In it you +become a part, an opening. You come to feel, "Existence and I are one." Then you are +welcomed, and there is no fear and there is no death. Then love flows from you. Then +love is not an effort — you cannot do anything except love. Then it is like breathing. Deep +inside you breathe love; in and out you breathe love. + +This love grows into devotion. Then ultimately you will even forget, it just as you forget +your breathing. When do you remember your breathing? Have you observed? You +remember only when something is wrong. + +When you feel any difficulty, then you know that you have been breathing; otherwise +there is no need even to be aware of it. And if you are aware of your breathing, that +shows that something is wrong with your breathing process. There is no need of being +aware of the breathing process. Silently it goes on. + +So when you are aware of your love, the love that is a state of mind, it means that +something is still wrong. By and by even that awareness is lost. You simply breathe love +in and out. You have forgotten everything, even that you love. Then it has become +devotion. That is the ultimate peak, the ultimate possibility — you may call it anything. +Love can become devotion only when this awareness is lost, forgotten. It doesn’t mean +that you have become unconscious, it only means that the process has become so silent +that there is no noise around it. You are not unconscious of it, but you are not conscious +of it either. It has become so natural. It is there, but it does not create any disturbance +inside; it has become so hannonious. + +So remember, when I am talking about love, I am not talking about your love. But if you +try to understand your love, it will become a step toward growing into a different kind of +love. So I am not against your love. I am simply stating the fact that if your love is fear- +based, it is just ordinary, animal love. And no derogation, no condemnation is implied; it +is simply a fact. + + + +Man is afraid. He needs someone who gives him the feeling that he is welcomed, he need +not be afraid. At least with one person you need not be filled with fear. This is good as +far as it goes, but this is not what Buddha or Jesus called love. They called love a state of +mind, not a relationship. So go beyond relationship, and by and by just be loving. First +you will not be capable of it unless you move into meditation. Unless you come to know +the deathless within, unless you come to know a deep unity between the inner and the +outer, unless you feel that you are existence, it will be difficult. + +So these techniques of meditation are just to help you grow from relationship into a state +of mind. And do not think of time at all, time is irrelevant for love. + +The second question: + +Question 2 + +MOST OF THE TECHNIQUES WHICH YOU HAVE DISCUSSED HAVE USED THE +BODY AS AN INSTRUMENT. WHAT ARE THE REASONS FOR THE BODY TO BE +GIVEN SO MUCH IMPORTANCE BY TANTRA? + +Many basic points are to be understood. One, you are your body. Right now you are just +your body and nothing else. You may have notions about the soul, the ATMAN, etc — +those are simply notions, just ideas. As you are right now you are just a body. And do not +go on deceiving yourself that you are the deathless soul, the immortal atman. Do not go +on deceiving yourself. That is just an idea, and that idea too is fear-based. + + +You do not know whether the soul exists or not; you have never penetrated to the +innermost core where one realizes the deathless. You have only heard about it, and you +cling to the idea because you are afraid of death. You know death is real, so you go on +wishing and believing that something in you must be there which is deathless. This is a +wish fulfillment. + +I am not saying that there is no soul, I am not saying that there is nothing which is +deathless. No, I am not saying that. But as far as you are concerned, you are just the body +with an idea that there is a soul which is deathless. This is just in the mind, and this too +you have collected because of the fear. That is why the weaker you will become, the +older, the more you will become a believer in the immortal soul and God. Then you will +go to the church or the temple or the mosque. If you go to the mosque or the church or +the temple, you will find that old men, just on the verge of death, are gathered there. +Youth is basically atheistic; always this has been so. The younger you are, the less +theistic. The younger you are, the more you are an unbeliever. Why? Because you are +still strong and you feel less fear, and you are still ignorant of death. Death is far away +somewhere, it happens only to others. It happens only to others, not to you. But the older +you grow, you will by and by begin to feel that now it is going to happen to you also. + + +Death comes near, and one begins to believe. So all beliefs are fear-based. All beliefs are +fear-based! And one who believes because of fear is really deceiving himself. You are the +body right now — this is a fact. You do not know anything about the deathless, you know +only about the "deathful." But the deathless is there; you can know it. Believing won’t do, +only knowing can help. You can realize it, but just ideas are of no use unless they +become a concrete experience. + +So do not be deceived by ideas and do not take ideas and beliefs for experiences. That is +why tantra always starts with the body — because that is a fact. You have to start from the + + + +body because you are in the body. And that too is not right. When I say you are in the +body, that too is not right. As far as you are concerned you ARE the body, not IN the +body. You do not know anything about what is in the body, you know only the body. +That experience of something beyond body is still far away. + +If you go to metaphysicians, to theologians, they are going to start with the soul. But +tantra is absolutely scientific. It starts from where you are, not from where you can be. +Starting from where you can be is absurd — you cannot start from where you can be, you +can start only from where you are. + +Tantra has no condemnation against the body. Tantra is a total acceptance of things as +they are. + +Christian theologians, and those of other religions also, are condemnatory, against the +body. They create a dualism, a dichotomy, that you are two. And the body is the enemy, +the evil for them, so fight with it. This duality is basically wrong, and this duality will +divide your mind into two and will create a split personality. + +Religions have helped the human mind to be schizophrenic. Any division will divide you +deeply, and you will become two, or you will become many. And everyone is a crowd of +many divisions, with no organic unity and with no center. You are not an individual as +far as the meaning of the word is concerned. The word means indivisible: 'individual’ +means indivisible. But you are just divided into many things. + +Not only are your mind and your body divided, your soul and your body are divided also. +The nonsense has gone so deep that even the body is divided: the lower body is evil and +the upper body is good. It is stupid, but it is there. Even you yourself cannot feel at ease +with your lower body. Some uneasiness creeps in. There is division and division and +division... + +Tantra accepts everything. Whatsoever is, is accepted wholeheartedly. That is why tantra +could accept sex totally. For five thousand years tantra has been the only tradition which +has accepted sex totally, the only one all over the world. Why? Because sex is the point +where you are, and any movement is going to be from the point where you are. + + +You are at the sex center; your energy is at the sex center. And from that point it has to +move up, far beyond. If you reject the center itself, then you can go on deceiving yourself +that you are moving, but you cannot move. Then you are rejecting the only point from +where movement is possible. So tantra accepts the body, accepts sex, accepts everything. +And tantra says, wisdom accepts everything and transforms it; only ignorance rejects. +Only ignorance rejects — wisdom accepts everything. Even a poison can become a +medicine, but only through wisdom. + +The body can become a vehicle to that which is beyond body, and sex energy can become +a spiritual force. And remember, when you ask, "what are the reasons that the body is +given so much importance in tantra?" why do you ask? Why? + +You are born as a body; you live as a body; you become ill as a body; you are treated, +given medicine, helped, made whole and healthy, as a body. You become young as a +body, you will become old as a body, you will die as a body. Your whole life is body- +centered - centered around the body. You will love someone. You will make love to +someone and you will create other bodies; you will reproduce other bodies. + +What are you doing the whole life? Preserving yourself. What are you preserving with +food, with water, with shelter? The body is preserved. What are you doing by + + + +reproducing children? The body is being reproduced. + + +The whole life, ninety-nine point nine percent, is body-oriented. You can go beyond, but +that journey has to be through the body, by the body, and you have to use the body. But +why do you ask? Because the body is just the outer thing. Deep down the body is a +symbol of sex. + +So those traditions which are against sex will be against the body. Those traditions which +are not against sex can only be friendly toward the body. Tantra is absolutely friendly, +and tantra says that the body is sacred, holy. For tantra, to condemn the body is a +sacrilege. To say that the body is impure or to say that the body is sin is nonsense for +tantra - a very poisonous teaching. Tantra accepts the body - not only accepts it, but says +that the body is holy, pure, innocent. You can use it and you can make it a vehicle, a +medium, to go beyond! It helps even in going beyond. + +But if you start fighting with body, you are lost. If you start fighting with it, you will +become more and more diseased. And if you go on fighting with it, you will miss an +opportunity. Fighting is negative; tantra is a positive transformation. Do not fight with it +— there is no need. It is as if you are sitting in a car and you start fighting with the car. +Then you cannot move because you are fighting with the vehicle — which has to be used, +not fought against. And you will destroy the vehicle by your fighting, and then it will be +more and more difficult to move. + + +The body is a beautiful vehicle - very mysterious, very complex. Use it, do not fight with +it. Help it. The moment you go against it you are going against yourself. It is as if a man +wants to reach somewhere, but he fights with his own legs and cuts them. Tantra says, +know the body and know the secrets of it. Know the energies of it and know how those +energies can be transformed - how they can be moved and turned into different +dimensions. + +For example, take sex, which is the basic energy in the body. Ordinarily, sex energy is +just used for reproduction. One body creates another body and it goes on. The biological +utility of sex energy is only in reproduction. But that is only one of the uses, and the +lowest. No condemnation is implied, but it is the lowest. The same energy can do other +creative acts also. Reproduction is a basic creative act — you create something. That is +why a woman feels a subtle well-being when she becomes a mother: she has created +something. + +Psychologists say that because man cannot reproduce like woman, because man cannot +become a mother, he feels a certain unease, and to destroy that unease or to overcome it +he goes on creating other things. He will paint, he will do something in which he +becomes a creator, in which he becomes a mother. That is one of the reasons why women +are less creative and men are more creative - because women have a natural dimension in +which to be creative. + +They can become mothers and they can have a fulfillment, an easy fulfillment. A deep +biological creativity is felt. + +But man lacks that and feels somewhere an imbalance. He wants to create, so he will +substitute something. He will paint, he will sing, he will dance. He will do something in +which he also becomes a mother. Sex energy, psychologists say now — and tantra has +always been saying that — is always the source of all creation. So it happens that if a + + + +painter is really deep in his creation, he may forget sex completely. When a poet is very +involved with his poetry, he will forget sex completely. He need not force any +BRAHMACHARYA, any celibacy, upon himself. + +Only monks, non-creative monks living in a monastery, need to force brahmacharya - +because if you are creative, the same energy which moves through sex moves into +creation. You can forget it completely, and there is no need to make any effort to forget it +because that is impossible. You cannot make any effort to forget anything, because the +very effort will make you remember it again and again. That is futile - in fact, suicidal. +You cannot try to forget anything. + +That is why those who force themselves to be brahmacharis , celibates, become simply +cerebral sex perverts. Then sex revolves in the mind: the whole thing goes on in the mind +- not in the body, but in the mind. And that is worse, because then the mind becomes +totally mad. + +Any creativity will help sex to disappear. + +Tantra says, if you move into meditation sex will disappear completely; it can disappear +completely. The whole energy is being absorbed at higher centers — and your body has +many centers. Sex is the lowest center, and man exists at the lowest center. The more +energy moves higher, the more the higher centers begin to flower. When the same energy +comes to the heart, then it becomes love. When the same energy comes higher still, new +dimensions and new experiences begin to flower. And when the same energy is at the +highest, at the last peak in your body, it has reached that which tantra calls SAHASRAR - +the last chakra in the head. + +Sex is the lowest chakra and sahasrar is the highest, and between these two the sex +energy moves. It can be released from the sex center. When it is released from the sex +center you become a cause to reproduce someone else. When the same energy is released +from the sahasrar, from the head into the cosmos, you give a new birth to yourself. It is +also reproduction, but not biologically. Then it is spiritually a reproduction; then you are +reborn. In India we used to call such a person "twice-born" - DWIJ. Now he has given +himself a new birth. The same energy has moved. + +Tantra has no condemnations, only secret techniques for how to transform. That is why +tantra talks so much about the body — it is needed. + +The body has to be understood, and you can start only from where you are. + +The third question: + +Question 3 + +YOU SAID THAT LOVE CAN MAKE YOU FREE. BUT ORDINARILY WE SEE +THAT LOVE BECOMES ATTACHMENT, AND INSTEAD OF FREEING US IT +MAKES US MORE BOUND. SO TELL US SOMETHING ABOUT ATTACHMENT +AND FREEDOM. + +Love becomes attachment because there is no love. You were just playing, deceiving +yourself. The attachment is the reality; the love was just a foreplay. So whenever you fall +in love, sooner or later you discover you have become an instrument - and then the whole +misery begins. What is the mechanism? Why does it happen? + +Just a few days ago a man came to me and he was feeling very guilty. He said, "I loved a +woman. I loved her very much. The day she died I was weeping and crying, but suddenly +I became aware of a certain freedom within me, as if some burden had left me. I felt a +deep breath, as if I had become free." + + + +That moment he became aware of a second layer of his feeling. Outwardly he was +weeping and crying and saying, "I cannot live without her. Now it will be impossible, or +the life will be just like death. But deep down," he said, "I became aware that I am feeling +very good, that now I am free." + +A third layer began to feel guilt. It said to him, "What are you doing?" And the dead body +was lying there just before him, he said to me, and he began to feel a great deal of guilt. + +He said to me, "Help me. What has happened to my mind? Have I betrayed her so +soon?" + +Nothing has happened; no one has betrayed. When love becomes attachment, it becomes +a burden, a bondage. But why does love become an attachment? The first thing to be +understood is that if love becomes an attachment, you were just in an illusion that it was +love. You were just playing with yourself and thinking that this was love. Really, you +were in need of attachment. And if you go still deeper, you will find that you were also in +need of becoming a slave. + +There is a subtle fear of freedom, and everyone wants to be a slave. Everyone, of course, +talks about freedom, but no one has the courage to be really free, because when you are +really free you are alone. If you have the courage to be alone, then only can you be free. +But no one is courageous enough to be alone. You need someone. Why do you need +someone? You are afraid of your own loneliness. You become bored with yourself. And +really, when you are lonely, nothing seems meaningful. With someone you are occupied, +and you create artificial meanings around you. + +You cannot live for yourself, so you start to live for someone else. And the same is the +case with the someone else also: he, or she, cannot live alone, so he is in search to find +someone. Two persons who are afraid of their own loneliness come together and they +start a play - a play of love. + +But deep down they are searching for attachment, commitment, bondage. + +So sooner or later, whatsoever you desire happens. This is one of the most unfortunate +things in this world. Whatsoever you desire comes to happen. You will get it sooner or +later and the foreplay will disappear. When its function is done, it will disappear. When +you have become a wife and husband, slaves to each other, when marriage has happened, +love will disappear because love was just an illusion in which two persons could become +slaves to each other. + +Directly you cannot ask for slavery; it is too humiliating. And directly you cannot say to +someone, "Become my slave. "He will revolt. Nor can you say, "I want to become a slave +to you," so you say, "I cannot live without you." But the meaning is there; it is the same. +And when this - the real desire - is fulfilled, love disappears. Then you feel bondage, +slavery, and then you start struggling to become free. + +Remember this. It is one of the paradoxes of the mind: whatsoever you get you will get +bored with, and whatsoever you do not get you will long for. When you are alone, you +will long for some slavery, some bondage. When you are in bondage, you will begin to +long for freedom. Really, only slaves long for freedom, and free people try again to be +slaves. The mind goes on like a pendulum, moving from one extreme to the other. + +Love doesn’t become attachment. + +Attachment was the need; love was just a bait. You were in search of a fish named +attachment: love was just a bait to catch the fish. When the fish is caught, the bait is + + + +thrown. Remember this, and whenever you are doing something, go deep within yourself +to find out the basic cause. + +If there is real love, it will never become attachment. What is the mechanism for love to +become attachment? The moment you say to your lover or beloved, "Love only me," you +have started possessing. And the moment you possess someone you have insulted him +deeply, because you have made him into a thing. + +When I possess you, you are not a person then, but just one more item amongst my +furniture - a thing. Then I use you, and you are my thing, my possession, so I won’t allow +anyone else to use you. It is a bargain in which I am possessed by you, and you make me +a thing. It is the bargain that now no one else can use you. Both partners feel bound and +enslaved. I make a slave of you, then you in return make a slave of me. + +Then the struggle starts. I want to be a free person, and still I want you to be possessed by +me; you want to retain your freedom and still possess me — this is the struggle. If I +possess you, I will be possessed by you. If I do not want to be possessed by you, I should +not possess you. + +Possession should not come in between. We must remain individuals and we must move +as independent, free consciousnesses. + +We can come together, we can merge into each other, but no one possesses. Then there is +no bondage and then there is no attachment. + +Attachment is one of the ugliest things. And when I say ugliest, I do not mean only +religiously, I mean aesthetically also. When you are attached, you have lost your +loneliness, your aloneness: you have lost everything. Just to feel good that someone +needs you and someone is with you, you have lost everything, you have lost yourself. + +But the trick is that you try to be independent and you make the other the possession - +and the other is doing the same. So do not possess if you do not want to be possessed. +Jesus said somewhere, "Judge ye not so that ye should not be judged." It is the same: +"Possess not so that ye should not be possessed." Do not make anyone a slave; otherwise +you will become a slave. + +So-called masters are always slaves of their own slaves. You cannot become a master of +some one without becoming a slave — that is impossible. + +You can only be a master when no one is a slave to you. This seems paradoxical, because +when I say you can only be a master when no one is a slave to you, you will say, "Then +what is the mastery? How am I a master when no one is a slave to me?" But I say only +then are you a master. Then no one is a slave to you and no one will try to make a slave +out of you. + +To love freedom, to try to be free, means basically that you have come to a deep +understanding of yourself. + +Now you know that you are enough unto yourself. You can share with someone, but you +are not dependent. I can share myself with someone. I can share my love, I can share my +happiness, I can share my bliss, my silence, with someone. But that is a sharing, not a +dependence. If no one is there, I will be just as happy, just as blissful. If someone is there, +that is also good and I can share. + +When you realize your inner consciousness, your center, only then will love not become +an attachment. If you do not know your inner center, love will become an attachment. If +you know your inner center, love will become devotion. But you must first be there to +love, and you are not. + + + +Buddha was passing trough a village. One young man came to him and said, "Teach me +something: how can I serve others?" Buddha laughed at him and said, "First be. Forget +others. First be yourself and then everything will follow." + +Right now you are not. When you say, "When I love someone it becomes an +attachment," you are saying you are not, so whatsoever you do goes wrong because the +doer is absent. The inner point of awareness is not there, so whatsoever you do goes +wrong. First BE, and then you can share your being. And that sharing will be love. + +Before that, whatsoever you do will become an attachment. + +And lastly: if you are struggling against attachment, you have taken a wrong turn. + +You can struggle. So many monks, recluses, sannyasins are doing that. They feel that +they are attached to their house, to their property, to their wives, to their children, and +they feel caged, imprisoned. They escape, they leave their homes, they leave their wives, +they leave their children and possessions, and they become beggars and escape to a +forest, to a loneliness. But go and observe them. They will become attached to their new +surroundings. + +I was visiting a friend who was a recluse living under a tree in a deep forest, but there +were other ascetics also. One day it happened that I was staying with this recluse under +his tree, and a new seeker came while my friend was absent. He had gone to the river to +take a bath. Under his tree the new sannyasin started meditating. + +The man came back from the river, and he pushed that new man away from the tree and +said, "This is my tree. You go and find another, somewhere else. No one can sit under my +tree." And this man had left his house, his wife, his children. Now the tree had become a +possession — you cannot meditate under his tree. + +You cannot escape so easily from attachment. It will take new forms, new shapes. You +will be deceived, but this will be there. So do not fight with attachment, just try to +understand why it is there. And then know the deep cause: because you are not, this +attachment is there. + + +Inside, you your own self is so much absent that you try to cling to anything in order to +feel safe. You are not rooted, so you try to make anything your roots. When you are +rooted in your self, when you know who you are, what this being is which is in you and +what this consciousness is which is in you, then you will not cling to anyone. + +That doesn’t mean you will not love. Really, only then can you love because then sharing +is possible - and with no conditions, with no expectations. You simply share because you +have an abundance, because you have so much it is overflowing. + +This overflowing of yourself is love. And when this overflowing becomes a flood, when +by your own overflowing the whole universe is filled and your love touches the stars, in +your love the earth feels good and in your love the whole universe is bathed, then it is +devotion. + + +THE END. + + + +Chapter 21: Three looking techniques + + +6. EYES CLOSED, SEE YOUR INNER BEING IN DETAIL. THUS SEE YOUR TRUE +NATURE. + +7. LOOK UPON A BOWL WITHOUT SEEING THE SIDES OR THE MATERIAL. IN +A FEW MOMENTS BECOME AWARE. + +8. SEE AS IF FOR THE FIRST TIME A BEAUTEOUS PERSON OR AN ORDINARY +OBJECT. + +Tonight's techniques are concerned with the practice of looking. Before we enter these +techniques, something has to be understood about the eyes, because all these seven +techniques depend on that. The first thing: eyes are the most non-bodily part in the +human body, the least bodily. If matter can become non-matter, then such is the case with +eyes. Eyes are material, but simultaneously they are also non-material. Eyes are a +meeting point of you and your body. Nowhere else in the body is the meeting so deep. + +The human body and you are much separated, a great distance is there. But at the point of +the eyes you are nearest to your body and the body is nearest to you. That is why eyes +can be used for the inner journey. A single jump from the eyes can lead you to the source. +That is not possible from the hand, not possible from the heart, not possible from +anywhere else in the body. From elsewhere you will have to travel long; the distance is +great. But from the eyes a single step is enough to enter into yourself. That is why eyes +have been used continuously in religious yogic and tantric practices. + + +The first reason is because you are NEAREST from there. That is why, if you know how +to look into someone's eyes, you can look into his depths. He is there. He is not so +present anywhere else in the body, but if you can look into his eyes you will find him +there. It is a difficult art to look into someone else's eyes, and it comes to you only when +you have taken a jump from your own eyes within; otherwise you cannot look. If you +have not looked within beyond your own eyes, you cannot have a look into someone +else's eyes. But if you know how to look into the eyes, you can touch the depth of the +person. + +That is why only in love can you look straight and stare into another's eyes. Otherwise, if +you stare into someone's eyes he will feel offended. You are trespassing; this is a +trespass. You can look at the body — there is no trespass. But the moment you stare into +somebody's eyes, you are trespassing his individuality, you are trespassing his individual +freedom, you are entering him without any invitation. That is why there is a limit, and +now the limit can be measured. At the most you can be allowed to look for three seconds. +You can be allowed just a casual look and then you have to move your eyes; otherwise +the other will feel offended. This is violent, because you can have a glimpse of his inner +secrets, and that cannot be allowed. + +Only in deep love can you look into another’s eyes, because love means that now you do +not want to maintain any secrets. + +You are now open to the other and the other is always welcome and invited to enter you. +And when lovers look into each other’s eyes, there is a meeting which is non-bodily, +there is a meeting which is not of the body. So the second thing to be remembered: your + + + +mind, your consciousness, your soul, whatsoever is within you, can be glimpsed through +the eyes. + +That is why a blind man has a dead face. It is not only that the eyes are lacking, but that +the face is dead — not alive. Eyes are the light of the face: they enlighten your face; they +give it an inner aliveness. When the eyes are not there, your face lacks aliveness. And a +blind man is really closed. You cannot enter him so easily. That is why blind men are +very secretive and you can rely upon a blind man. If you give him a secret, you can rely +upon him. He will maintain it, and it will be difficult to judge whether he has a secret. + +But with a man who has alive eyes, it can be judged immediately that he has a secret. + +For example, you are traveling without a ticket on a railway train. Your eyes will go on +betraying you that you are without a ticket. It is a secret; no one knows, only you know. +But your eyes will have a different look, and you will look at anyone who enters the train +with a different quality. If the other could understand the quality, he would know +immediately that you are without a ticket. The look will be different when you have a +ticket. + +The look will be different! + +So if you are hiding a secret, your eyes will reveal it. And to control the eyes is very +difficult. The most difficult thing in the body to control is the eyes. So everyone cannot +become a great detective because the basic training of the detective is the training of the +eyes. His eyes should not reveal anything — or on the contrary they should reveal the +opposite. When he is traveling without a ticket, his eyes should reveal that he has a ticket. +It is very difficult because eyes are not voluntary: they are non-voluntary. + +Now many experiments are being done on the eyes. Someone is a BRAHMACHARI, a +celibate, and he says he has no attraction toward women. But his eyes will reveal +everything; he may be hiding his attraction. A beautiful woman enters the room. He may +not look at her, but even his not looking at her will be revealing. There will be an effort, a +subtle suppression, and the eyes will show it. Not only that, the surface of the eyes will +expand. When a beautiful woman enters, the pupils of the eyes will expand immediately +to allow the beautiful woman more space to go in. And you cannot do anything about it +because those pupils and their expansion is non-voluntary. You cannot do anything! It is +absolutely impossible to control them. So the second thing to remember is that your eyes +are the doors to your secrets. If anyone wants to enter into your secret world, your +privacy, your eyes are the doors. + + +If you know how to unlock them, you will become vulnerable, open. And if you want to +enter into your own secret life, your inner life, then again you will have to use the same +lock and unlocking system. You will have to work on your eyes, only then can you enter. +Thirdly, eyes are very liquid, moving, in constant movement, and that movement has its +own rhythm, its own system, its own mechanism. Your eyes are not moving at random, +anarchically. They have a rhythm of their own and that rhythm shows many things. If you +have a sexual thought in the mind, your eyes move differently — with a different rhythm. +Just by looking at your eyes and the movement, one can say what type of thought is +moving inside. When you feel hungry and a thought of food is inside, eyes have a +different movement. + +So now even your dreams can be penetrated. Your eye movements can be recorded while +you are asleep. And remember, even in dreams your eyes behave similarly. If you are + + + +seeing a naked woman in your dream, this can be judged from your eye movements. Now +they are mechanical devices to record what are the movements of the eyes. + +These eye movements are called R.E.M. — Rapid Eye Movements. They can be recorded +on a graph, just like an electro-cardiogram. If you have been sleeping for the whole night, +your eye movements can be continuously recorded. And then the graph can show when +you were dreaming and when you were not, because when you are not dreaming the eyes +stop and become static. + +When you are dreaming they move, and the movement is like when you are seeing +something on the screen. If you are seeing a film, the eyes have to move. In the same +way, in your dream your eyes move: they are seeing something. They follow the +movements of the film. For your eyes there is no difference between an actual film being +shown on the screen or just a dream film. + +So these R.E.M. recorders tell how much you dreamt in the night and for how many +moments you were not dreaming, because the eyes stop their movement when you are not +dreaming. There are many persons who say they never dream. They just have a very +absent-minded memory — nothing else. They cannot remember, that is the only thing. +They are actually dreaming, for the whole night they are dreaming, but they cannot +remember. Their memory is not good, that is all. So in the morning when they say there +was no dream, do not believe them. + +Why do the eyes move when there is a dream, and why do the eyes stop when there is no +dream? Each eye movement is joined to the thought process. If thinking is there, the eyes +will move. If there is no thinking, the eyes will not move — there is no need. + +So remember this third point also, that eye movements and thinking are joined together. +That is why if you stop your eyes and their movements, your thought process will stop +immediately. Or if your thought process stops your eyes will stop automatically. + + +And one point more, the fourth. The eyes move continuously from one object to another. +From A to B, from B to C, they go on moving. Movement is their nature. It is just like a +river flowing: movement is their nature! And because of that movement, they are so +alive! Movement is also life. + +You can try to stop your eyes at a particular point, at a particular object, and not allow +them to move, but movement is their nature. You cannot stop movement, but you can +stop your eyes: understand the distinction. You can stop your eyes at a particular fixed +point — on a dot on the wall. You can stare at the dot; you can stop your eyes. But +movement is their nature. So they may not move from object A to object B because you +have forced them to remain at A, but then a very strange phenomenon happens. +Movement is bound to be there; that is their nature. If you do not allow them movement +from A to B, they will move from outwards to inwards. Either they can move from A to +B, or if you do not allow this outward movement they will move inwards. Movement is +their nature; they need movement. If you suddenly stop and do not allow them to move +outwards, they will start moving inwards. + +So there are two possibilities of movement. One is from object A to object But — this is +an outward movement. This is how it is happening naturally. But there is another +possibility which is of tantra and yoga — not allowing movement from one outside object +to another and stopping this movement. + + + +Then the eyes jump from an outside object to the inner consciousness, they begin to +move inwards. Remember these four points; then it will be easy to understand the +techniques. + +The first technique: + +EYES CLOSED, SEE YOUR INNER BEING IN DETAIL. THUS SEE YOUR TRUE +NATURE. + +EYES CLOSED... + +Close your eyes. But this closing is not enough. Total closing means to close your eyes +and stop their movements; otherwise the eyes will continue to see something which is of +the outside. Even with closed eyes you will see things — images of things. Actual things +are not there, but images, ideas, collected memories — they will start flowing. They are +also from outside, so your eyes are still not totally closed. Totally closed eyes means +nothing to see. + +Understand the difference. You can close your eyes; that is easy, everyone closes them +every moment. In the night you close your eyes, but that will not reveal the inner nature +to you. Close your eyes so that nothing remains to be seen — no outside object, no inside +image of any outside object, just a blank darkness as if you have suddenly gone blind. + +Not blind only to reality, but to the dream reality also. + +One has to practise it. A long period will be needed; it cannot be done suddenly. You will +need a long training. Close your eyes. Anytime you feel that it is easy and you have time, +close your eyes and then inwardly stop all movements of the eyes. + +Do not allow any movement. Feel! Do not allow any movement. Stop all movements of +the eyes. Feel as if they have become stones, and then remain in that "stoney" state of the +eyes. Do not do anything; just remain there. Suddenly, someday, you will become aware +that you are looking inside yourself. + +You can go just outside this building, move around the building and have a look, but that +is looking at the building from the outside. Then you can enter into the room and you can +stand in this room and have a look. That is looking at the building from the inside. When +you are taking a round outside, you see the walls, but only one side; (The walls are the +same, but) then you are seeing the outside of the walls. When you come in, the walls are +the same, but now you will see the inside of the walls. + +You have seen your body only from the outside. You have seen your body in a mirror or +you have seen your hands from the outside. You do not know what the inside of your +body is. You have never entered into your own self; you have never been at the center of +your body and being, to look around at what is there from the inside. + +This technique is very helpful for having a look from the inside, and that transforms your +total consciousness, your total existence — because if you can have a look from the +inside, you immediately become different from the world. This false identity that "I am +the body" is only because we have been looking at our bodies from the outside. + +If you can have a look from the inside, the looker becomes different. And then you can +move your consciousness in your body, from your toe to your head; you can now have a +round inside the body. And once you become capable of having a look from the inside +and moving there, then it is not difficult to go outside at all. + +Once you know how to move, once you know that you are separate from the body, you +are freed from a great bondage. Now you have no gravitational pull; now you have no + + + +limitation. Now you are absolute freedom. You can go out of the body; you can go and +come. And then your body becomes just an abode. + +Close your eyes, see your inner being in detail and move from limb to limb inside. Just +go to your toe. Forget the whole body: move to the toe. Stay there and have a look. Then +move through the legs, come on upwards, go to every limb. Then many things happen. +MANY things happen! + +Then your body becomes such a sensitive vehicle, you cannot even imagine it. Then if +you touch someone, you can move into your hand totally and that touch will become +transfonning. That is what is meant by a master's touch: he can move to any limb totally, +and then he is concentrated there. If you can move to any part of your body totally, that +part becomes alive — so much alive that you cannot imagine what happens to that part. +Then you can move to the eyes totally. If you can move to your eyes totally and then look +into someone's eyes, you will penetrate him; you will go to his very depths. + + +Now psychoanalysts are trying to go to the depths through psychoanalysis. Then they +take one year, two years, three years... This is a sheer wastage of time. And life is so +short that if three years are taken to analyze a person's mind, it is nonsense. And then too +you cannot rely on whether the analysis is complete or not. You are groping in the dark. +The Eastern approach has been through the eyes. No need of analyzing the person for +such a long time. The work can be done by just entering through his eyes totally, +touching his depths, knowing many things about him of which even he is not aware. + +The master has many things to do. One of the basic things is this: to analyze you, to go +deep into you, to move into your darker realms which are unknown to you. And if he says +to you that something is hidden in you, you will not believe it. How can you believe it? +You are not aware of it. You know only one part of the mind — a very small fragment +which is just the upper part, just the first layer. Behind it there are hidden nine layers +which are not known to you, but through your eyes a penetration is possible. + +Close your eyes; SEE YOUR INNER BEING IN DETAIL. The first, outer part of the +technique is to look at your body inwardly — from your inner center. Stand there and +have a look. You will be separated from the body because the looker is never the looked +at. + +The observer is different from the object. + +If you can see your body totally from the inside, then you can never fall into the illusion +that you are the body. Then you will remain different — totally different: inside it but not +it, in the body but not the body. This is the first part. Then you can move; then you are +free to move. Once freed from the body, freed from the identity, you are free to move. +Now you can move into your mind — deep down. Those nine layers which are within and +unconscious can now be entered into. + +This is the inner cave of the mind. If you enter this cave of the mind, you will become +separate from the mind also. Then you will see that the mind is also an object which you +can look at, and that which is entering the mind is, again, separate and different. This +entering into the mind is what is meant by: SEE YOUR INNER BEING IN DETAIL. +Body and mind both should be entered and looked at from within. Then you are simply a +witness, and this witness cannot be penetrated. + +That is why it is your innermost core: that is you. That which can be penetrated, that +which can be seen, is not you. When you have come to that which cannot be penetrated, + + + +that in which you cannot move, which cannot be observed, then only have you come to +the real self. You cannot witness the witnessing source, remember — that is absurd. + +If someone says that "I have witnessed my witness," that is absurd. + +Why is it absurd? Because if you have witnessed your witnessing self, then the +witnessing self is not the witnessing self. That who has witnessed it is the witness. That +who you can see, you are not; that which you can observe, you are not; that which you +can become aware of, you are not. + +But a point comes beyond the mind where simply you are. Now you cannot divide your +single existence into two: object and subject. Simple subjectivity is there, just witnessing. +This is very, very difficult to comprehend through intellect because all the categories of +the intellect are broken there. + +Because of this logical difficulty, Charwak — the expounder of one of the most logical +philosophical systems in the world — says that you cannot know the self; there is no self- +knowledge. And because there is no self-knowledge, how can you say that there is a elf? +Whatsoever you know is not the self. The knower is the self, not the known, so you +cannot say logically that "I have known my self." That is absurd, illogical. How can you +know your self? Then who will be the knower and who will be the known? Knowledge +means a dichotomy, a division between object and subject, the knower and the known. + +So Charwak says that all those who say they have known the self are talking nonsense. +Self-knowledge is impossible because the self is irreducibly the knower. It cannot be +converted into the known. + + +Then Charwak says that if you cannot know the self, how can you say that there is self? +Those like Charwak, who do not believe in the presence of a self, are called +ANATMAVADIN. They say no self is; they say there is no self — that which cannot be +known is not. And they are right logically. If logic is all, they are right. But this is the +mystery of life, that logic is only the beginning — not the end. A moment comes when +logic ends, but you do not end. A moment comes when logic is finished, but you are still +there. Life is illogical. That is why it is difficult to comprehend, to conceive of what is +meant when it is said that only the witness remains. + +For example, if there is a lamp in this room, you see many objects around you. When the +lamp is turned off, there is darkness and nothing can be seen. When the lamp is put on, +there is light and you can see everything in the room. But have you ever observed what is +happening? If there are no objects, will you be able to see the lamp and its light? You +will not be able to see its light, because to be seen the light must reflect something. It +must strike an object. The rays must go to an object and then be reflected, then they will +reach to your eyes. So first you see objects, then you infer that light is there. When you +bum a lamp or a candle, you never see the light first. First you see the objects, and +because of the objects you come to know about the light. + + +Scientists say that if there are no objects then light cannot be seen. Look at the sky: it +looks blue but it is not blue, it is filled with cosmic rays. It looks blue because there are +no objects. Those rays cannot reflect and come to your eyes. If you go into space and +there are no objects, then there will be darkness. Of course, rays will be passing just by +your side, but there will be darkness. To know the light some objects have to be there. + + + +Charwak says that if you enter within and come to the point where only the witness has +remained and there is nothing to be witnessed, how can you know about it? Some object +must be there to be witnessed; only then can you know the witnessing. Logically, +scientifically, it is right. But existentially it is not right. + +Those who really move inside come to a point where there is no object left but just the +consciousness of being. You are, but nothing is there to be seen — only the seer. ONLY +the seer! There is simple subjectivity without any object around it. The moment you +come to this point, you have entered your ultimate goal of being. You can call it the alpha +— the beginning, or you can call it the omega - the end. It is both, alpha and omega. This +is called "self-knowledge." + +Linguistically the word is wrong because linguistically nothing can be said about it. +Language becomes meaningless when you enter the world of the one. + +Language is meaningful only when you are in the world of two. In the world of duality +language is meaningful because language is created in, is part of the dualistic world. It +becomes meaningless when you enter the one, the non-dual. That is why those who know +have remained silent — or even if they say something they hurriedly add that whatsoever +they are saying is just symbolic, and whatsoever they are saying is not exactly true: it is +false. + +Lao Tsu said that that which can be said cannot be true, and that which is true cannot be +said. He remained silent; for most of his life he would not write anything. He said, "If I +say something it will be untrue, because nothing can be said about the realm where only +the One remains." + +EYES CLOSED, SEE YOUR INNER BEING IN DETAIL - body and mind both. + +THUS SEE YOUR TRUE NATURE. See your body and mind, your structure. And +remember, body and mind are not two things. Rather, you are both: body-mind — +psychosomatic. Mind is the finer part of the body and body is the grosser part of the +mind. + +So if you can become aware of the structure of body-mind, if you can become conscious +of the structure, you are freed from the structure, you are freed from the vehicle, you have +become different. And this knowing that you are separate from the structure is your true +nature. That is what you really are. This body will die, but that true nature never dies. + +This mind will die and change, and die again and again, but that true nature never dies. +That true nature is eternal. That is why that true nature is neither your name nor your +form. It is beyond both. + +So how to do this technique? Total closing of the eyes is needed. If you try it, close your +eyes and then stop the movements. Let your eyes become just like stones. No movements +allowed. Suddenly, any day while practising this, suddenly it will happen that you will be +able to look within. The eyes which were always looking outside will turn in and you will +have a glimpse inside. + +Then there is no difficulty. Once you have the glimpse inside, you know what to do and +how to move. Only the first glimpse is difficult; after that you have the knack. Then it +becomes just like a trick. Any moment you can close your eyes, make your eyes static, +and you can enter the realm. + +Buddha was dying. It was the last day of his life, and he asked his disciples if they +wanted to ask any questions. They were weeping, crying, and they said, "You have told +us so much. Now nothing is left to ask." Buddha had a habit of asking thrice. He would + + + +never stop after asking once. He would ask again, and then he would ask still again +whether you had any question to ask . Many times Buddha was asked, "Why do you ask a +single thing three times?" He said, "Because man is so unaware, so unconscious, he may +not have heard the first time and he may have missed the second time." + + +Thrice he asked, and thrice his BHIKKHUS, monks, his disciples said, "Now we do not +want to ask anything. You have said so much." Then he closed his eyes and said, "If you +do not have anything to ask, before death occurs to the body I will move from it. Before +death enters the body I will move from it." + +He closed his eyes. His eyes became static and he started moving. It is said that there +were four parts to his movement inwards. First he closed his eyes; secondly, his eyes +became static, there were no movements. If you had then the instrument for recording +R.E.M., the graph would not have come. The eyes became static — that was the second +thing. Thirdly, he looked at his body; then fourthly, he looked at his mind. + +This was the whole journey. Before death occurred he was back at his center, in his +original source. That is why this death is not called death: we call it NIRVANA, and this +is the difference. We call it nirvana — cessation — not death. Ordinarily, we die because +death occurs to us. It never occurred to Buddha. Before death came, he had already +returned to the source. + +Death occurred only to the dead body — he was not there to be found. So in Buddhist +tradition it is said that he never died. Death could not catch him. It followed as it follows +him everyone, but he could not be trapped; he tricked Death out of it. He must have been +laughing — standing beyond, and Death was there only with a dead body. + + +This technique is the same. Make four parts of it and move. And when you know one +glimpse, the whole thing will become very easy and simple. Then any moment you can +move in and come out, and go in and come out, just like coming out of your house and +going in... coming out and going in. + +The second technique: + +LOOK UPON A BOWL WITHOUT SEEING THE SIDES OR THE MATERIAL. IN A +FEW MOMENTS BECOME AWARE. + +Look at anything. A bowl or any object will do, but look with a different quality. LOOK +UPON A BOWL WITHOUT SEEING THE SIDES OR THE MATERIAL. Look upon +any object, but with these two conditions... Do not look at the sides, look at the object as +a whole. Ordinarily, we look at parts. It may not be done so consciously, but we look at +parts. If I look at you, first I see your face, then your torso, and then your whole body. +Look at an object as a whole; do not divide it in parts. Why? Because when you divide +something in parts, the eyes have an opportunity to move from one part to another. Look +at a thing as a whole. You can do it. + +I can look at all of you in two ways. I can look from this side and then move. I can look +at A, then at B, then I look at C and go on moving. When I look at A, B and C, I am not +present — or just present on the fringe, but not focused. When I look at B, I am leaving A. +When I look at C, A has been completely lost; he has gone out of my focus. + + +I can look at this group in this manner, but I can look at the whole group without dividing + + + +it into individuals, into units, taking it as a whole. + +Try it. First look at a thing moving from one fragment to another. Then suddenly look at +this thing as a whole; do not divide it. When you look at a thing as a whole, the eyes have +no need to move. In order not to give any opportunity for movement, this has been made +a condition: look at an object totally, taken as a whole. And secondly, without seeing the +material. If the bowl is of wood, do not see the wood: just see the bowl, the form. Do not +see the substance. + +It may be of gold, it may be of silver — observe it. Do not look at the material of which it +is made, just look at the form. The first thing is to look at it as a whole. Secondly, look at +it as a fonn, not as a substance. Why? Because substance is the material part, form is the +spiritual part, and you are to move from the material to the non-material. It will be +helpful. + +Try it. You can try it with anyone. Some man or some woman is standing: look, and take +the man or woman wholly into your look, totally into it. It will be a weird feeling in the +beginning because you are not habituated this way, but it is very beautiful in the end. And +then, do not think about whether the body is beautiful or not, white or black, man or +woman. Do not think; just look at the form. + +Forget the substance and just look at the form. + +In a few moments become aware. Go on looking at the form as a whole. Do not allow the +eyes any movement. Do not start thinking about the material. What will happen? You +will suddenly become aware of your self. Looking at something, you will become aware +of your self. Why? Because for the eyes there is no possibility to move outwards. The +form has been taken as a whole, so you cannot move to the parts. The material has been +dropped; pure form has been taken. Now you cannot think about gold, wood, silver, etc. + +A form is pure fonn. No thinking about it is possible. A form is just a form; you cannot +think about it. If it is of gold, you can think many things. You would like, you may like to +steal it, or to do something with it, or to sell it, or you can think about the price — many +things are possible. But of pure form, no thinking is possible. Pure fonn stops thinking. +And there is no possibility of changing from one part to another; you have taken it as a +whole. + +Remain with the whole and the form. Suddenly you will become aware of yourself, +because now the eyes cannot move. And they need movement; that is their nature. So +your look will move toward you. It will come back, it will return home, and suddenly you +will become aware of your self. This becoming aware of one's self is one of the most +ecstatic moments possible. + +When for the first time you become aware of your self, it has such beauty and such bliss +that you cannot compare it with anything else you have known. + +Really, for the first time you become your self; for the first time you know you are. Your +being is revealed in a flash. + +But why does it happen? You might have seen, in children’s books particularly, a picture, +or in some psychological treatises, but I hope everyone must have seen somewhere or +other — a picture of an old woman, and in the same lines a beautiful young woman is also +hidden. There is one picture, the same lines, but two figures are in it: one old woman, one +young woman. + +Look at the picture: you cannot become aware of both simultaneously. You will become +aware either of one or the other. If you have become aware of the old woman, you cannot + + + +see where the young woman is hiding. But if you try to find her, it will be difficult, and +the very effort will become a barrier. Because you have become aware of the old woman, +she will have become a fixed thing in your eyes. With this fixed thing, you are trying to +find the young woman. It is impossible, you will not be able to find her. You have to do a +technique. + +Just stare at the old woman; forget the young woman completely. Stare at the old woman, +at the old woman figure. Stare! Go on staring. Suddenly the old woman will disappear, +and you will become aware of the young woman hiding there. + +Why? If you try to find her you will miss. This type of picture is given to children like a +puzzle, and it is said to them, "Find the other." Then they start trying to find her, and +because of that they miss. + +The trick is not to try to find her: just stare at the figure and you will become aware. +Forget the other, no need to think about it. Your eyes cannot remain at one point, so if +you stare at the old woman figure the eyes will become tired. Then suddenly they will +move from the figure, and in that movement you will become aware of the other figure +which is hidden just by the old woman's side, in the same lines. But the miracle is that +when you become aware of the young woman, you cannot see the old woman. But you +know that both are there now. + +In the beginning you may not have believed that the young woman is hiding, but now you +know because you have seen the old woman first. Now you know that the old woman is +there, but while looking at the young one you cannot simultaneously become aware of the +old one. And if you become aware of the old one, you will miss the young are again. + +Both cannot be seen simultaneously; you can see only one at a time. + +The same happens with the outside and the inside look. Y ou cannot have both looks +simultaneously. When you are looking at a bowl or at any object, you are looking out: the +consciousness is moving out, the river is flowing out. + +You are focused on the bowl. Go on staring at it. That very staring will create the +opportunity to move in. Your eyes will become tired; they would like to move. Finding +nothing to move out toward, suddenly the river will turn back — that remains the only +possibility. You will have forced your consciousness to fall back. And when you will +become aware of you, you will miss the bowl; it will not be there. + +That is why a Shankara or a Nagarjuna says the whole world is illusory; they have kn own +it so. When we come to know ourselves, the world is not. Really, the world is not +illusory; it is there. But you cannot see both worlds simultaneously — that is the problem. +So when a Shankara enters into himself, when he comes to know his self, when he +becomes a witness, the world is not there. So he is right. He says it is maya — illusion. It +simply appears to be; it is not there. + +Be aware of the fact. When you know the world, you are not. You are there, but hidden, +and you cannot believe that you are hidden there; the world is too much present for you. +And if you start to look for yourself directly, it will be difficult, the very effort may +become a barrier. So tantra says, fix your stare somewhere in the world, on any object, +and do not move from there, remain there. This very effort to remain there will create the +possibility for the consciousness to begin to flow upwards — backwards. + +Then you will become aware of your self. + +But when you become aware of your self, the bowl will not be there. It is there, but FOR + + + +YOU it will not be there. So Shankara says the world is illusory because when you come +to know your self the world is not there. It disappears like a dream. + +But Charwak and Epicurus and Marx, they are also right. They say the world is true, and +your self is just false; it is nowhere to be found. They say science is real. Science says +only matter is, only objects are; there is no subject. They are right, because the eyes are +focused on the object. + +A scientist is constantly focusing on objects. He forgets the self completely. Both +Shankara and Marx are right in one sense and wrong in another. If you are fixed upon the +world, if your look is fixed on the world, the self will look illusory — like it is just a +dream. If you are looking inwards, the world will become a dream. Both are real, but you +cannot be aware of both simultaneously — that is the problem. And nothing can be done. +You will meet the old woman or you will meet the young woman, and one will become +maya, illusory. But this technique can be used easily. It will take a little time, but it is not +difficult. + +Once you know the turning of consciousness, you can do it anywhere. Just riding in a bus +or sitting in a train you can do it — anywhere. No need of a bowl or any particular object: +you can do it with anything. + +With anything, stare, stare, stare... and suddenly turn inwards, and the train disappears. + +Of course, when you come back from your inner journey you will have traveled, but the +train will have disappeared. From one station you will reach to another, and in between +there will have been no train — just a gap. Of course, the train was there; otherwise how +can you come to the other station? But it was not there for you; for you it was not. + +Those who can practice this technique, they can live in the world very easily. Any +moment they can make anything disappear — remember this. You are bothered with your +wife or with your husband — you can have her or him disappear. The wife is there sitting +just by your side and she is not there. She is maya, she has disappeared. Just by staring +and then turning your consciousness inwards, she has ceased to be there. And it has +happened many times. + +I remember Socrates. His wife Xanthippe was very much worried about him, and any +wife would have been in the same dilemma. To have a Socrates as a husband is one of the +most difficult things to tolerate. Socrates is good as a teacher, but not as a husband. + +One day it happened... and because of it his wife has been condemned for two thousand +years continuously, but that is not just, I do not think she has done anything wrong. +Socrates was sitting there, and he must have been doing something like this technique — +it is not recorded, I am just assuming. + +His wife came with a tray, a teapot to give him tea. She must have found that he was not +there, so it is reported that she poured the tea upon Socrates, over his face. Then suddenly +he came back. + +His face remained burned for his whole life. And because of this his wife has been +condemned very much, but no one knows what Socrates was doing there — because no +wife would do this suddenly, there is no need. He must have done something; something +must have been happening there. That is why Xanthippe had to throw tea over him. He +must have been in an inner trance, and the burning sensation of the tea must have brought +him back, the consciousness must have returned. + +I assume that this was the case because there are many other cases reported about +Socrates which are similar. For forty-eight hours he was not found. He was sought all + + + +over, the whole Athens went in search of Socrates, but he was not to be found anywhere. +Then he was found outside the city, miles away, standing under a tree. Half of his body +was just under snow. Snow was falling, and he was just frozen, standing there with open +eyes. But he was not looking at anyone. + +When the crowd gathered around, they looked into his eyes and they thought that he was +dead. His eyes were just like stones — looking, but not looking at anyone; just static, +unmoving. They felt his heart: It was beating slowly; he was alive. + +They had to give him shocks, only then did he come back to look at them. Immediately +he asked, "What is the time now?" He had missed forty-eight hours completely, they +never existed for him. He was not in this world of time and space. + +So they asked, "What were you doing? We thought you were dead already... forty-eight +hours!" He said, "I was staring at the stars, and just suddenly it happened that the stars +disappeared. And then, I don't know... then the whole world disappeared. But I remained +in such a cool, calm, blissful state that if it is death it is worth thousands of lives. If it is +death, then I would like to enter it again and again." + +It may have happened without his knowledge, because Socrates was not a yogi, not a +tantric. He was not in any way concerned consciously with any spiritual practice. But he +was a great thinker, and it may have happened as an accident that he was staring at the +stars in the night, and suddenly his look returned back, inwards. You can do it. And stars +are really good objects. + +Lie down on the ground, look at the black sky, and then fix yourself on one star. +Concentrate on it, stare at it. Narrow down your consciousness to one star; forget other +stars. By and by, concentrate, narrow down your gaze. Other stars will be there just on +the fringe, on the boundary. But by and by they will disappear, and only one star will +remain. + +Then go on staring, go on staring. A moment will come when that star will disappear. + +And when that star disappears, you will appear to yourself. + +The third technique: + +SEE AS IF FOR THE FIRST TIME A BEAUTEOUS PERSON OR AN ORDINARY +OBJECT. + +Some basic things first; then you can do this technique. We look at things always with +old eyes. You come to your home; you look at it without looking at it. You know it — +there is no need to look at it. You have entered it again and again for years together. You +go to the door, you enter the door; you may unlock the door. But there is no need to look. +This whole process goes on robot-like, mechanically, unconsciously. If something goes +wrong, only if your key is not fitting into the lock, then you look at the lock. If the key +fits, you never look at the lock. Because of mechanical habits, repeatedly doing the same +thing again and again, you lose the capacity to look; you lose the freshness to look. + +Really, you lose the function of your eyes — remember this. You become basically blind, +because eyes are not needed. + +Remember the last time you looked at your wife. The last time you looked at your wife or +at your husband may have been years ago. For how many years have you not looked? + +You just pass, giving a casual glimpse, but not a look. Go again and look at your wife or +at your husband as if you were looking for the first time. + + + +Why? Because if you are looking for the first time, your eyes will be filled with a +freshness. They will become alive. + +You are passing through a street, and a beautiful woman passes. Your eyes become alive +— lighted. A sudden flame comes to them. This woman may be a wife to someone. He +will not look at her; he may become as blind as you have become seeing your wife. Why? +For the first time eyes are needed, the second time not so much, and the third time they +are not needed. After a few repetitions you become blind. We live blindly. + +Be aware. When you meet your children, are you looking at them? You are not looking at +them. This habit kills the eyes; the eyes become bored — repeatedly there is the old again +and again. And nothing is old really, it is just that your habit makes you feel that it is so. +Your wife is not the same as she was yesterday, she cannot be; otherwise she is a miracle. +Nothing can be the same the next moment. Life is flux, everything is flowing, nothing is +the same. + +The same sunrise will not happen again. In a sense also, the sun is not the same. Every +day it is new; basic changes have occurred. And the sky will not be the same again; this +morning is not going to come again. Every morning has its own individuality, and the sky +and the colors, they will not gather in the same pattern again. But you go on moving as if +everything is just the same. + + +They say nothing is new under the sky. Really, nothing is old under the sky. Only the +eyes become old, accustomed to things; then nothing is new. For children everything is +new: that is why everything gives them excitement. Even a colored stone on a beach, and +they become so excited. You will not be excited even seeing God himself coming to your +house. You will not be so excited! You will say, "I know him, I have read about him." +Children are so excited because their eyes are new and fresh, And everything is a new +world, a new dimension. + +Look at children's eyes — at the freshness, the radiant aliveness, the vitality. They look +mirror-like, silent, but penetrating. Only such eyes can reach within. + +So this technique says, SEE AS IF FOR THE FIRST TIME A BEAUTEOUS PERSON +OR AN ORDINARY OBJECT. Anything will do. Look at your shoes. You have been +using them for years, but look as if for the first time and see the difference: the quality of +your consciousness suddenly changes. + +I wonder whether you have seen Van Gogh's painting of his shoe. It is one of the rarest +things. There is just an old shoe — tired, sad, as if just on the verge of death. It is just an +old shoe, but look at it, feel it, and you will feel what a long, boring life this shoe must +have passed through. It is so sad, just praying to be taken away from life, tired +completely, every nerve broken, just an old man, an old shoe. + +It is one of the most original paintings. But how could Van Gogh see it? + +You have even more old shoes with you — more tired, more dead, more sad, depressed, +but you have never looked at them, at what you have done to them, how you have +behaved with them. They tell a life story about you because they are your shoes. They +can say everything about you. If they could write, they would write a most authentic +biography of the person they had to live with — every mood, every face. When their +owner was in love he behaved differently with the shoes, when he was angry he behaved +differently. And the shoes were not concerned at all, and everything has left a mark. + +Look at Van Gogh's painting, and then you will see what he could see in the shoes. + + + +Everything is there — a whole biography of the person who was using them. But how +could he see? To be a painter, one has to regain the child's look, the freshness. He can +look at everything — at most ordinary things even. He can look! + +Cezanne has painted a chair, just an ordinary chair, and you may even wonder... why +paint a chair? There is no need. But he worked on that painting for months together. You +may have stopped for a single moment to look at it, and he worked for months on it +because he could look at a chair. A chair has its own spirit, its own story, its own +miseries and happinesses. It has lived! It has passed through life! It has its own +experiences, memories. + +They are all revealed in Cezanne’s painting. But do you look at your chair? No one looks +at it, no one feels it. + +Any object will do. This technique is just to make your eyes fresh — so fresh, alive, +radiantly vital, that they can move within and you can have a look at your inner self. SEE +AS IF FOR THE FIRST TIME. Make it a point to see everything as if for the first time, +and sometime, suddenly, you will be surprised at what a beautiful world you have been +missing. Suddenly become aware and look at your wife as if for the first time. And it will +be no wonder if you feel again the same love you felt the first time, the same surge of +energy, the same attraction in its fullest. But look as if for the first time at a +BEAUTEOUS PERSON OR AN ORDINARY OBJECT. What will happen? You will +regain your eyesight. You are blind. Just now, as you are, you are blind. And this +blindness is more fatal than physical blindness, because you have eyes and still you +cannot look. + +Jesus says many times, "Those who have eyes, let them see. Those who have ears, let +them hear." It seems that he was talking to blind men or to deaf men. But he goes on +repeating it What was he - a superintendent in some institute for the blind ? He goes on +repeating, "If you have eyes, look." He must be talking with ordinary men who have +eyes. But why this insistence on, "If you have eyes, look"? He is talking about the eyes +which this technique can give you. + + +Look at everything you pass as if for the first time. Make it a continuous attitude. Touch +everything as if for the first time. What will happen? If you can do this, you will be freed +from your past. The burden, the depth, the dirtiness, the accumulated experiences - you +will be freed from them. + +Every moment, move from the past. Do not allow it to enter within you; do not allow it to +be carried — leave it. Look at everything as if for the first time. This is a great technique +to help you to be freed from the past. Then you are constantly in the present, and by and +by you will have an affinity with the present. Then everything will be new. Then you will +be able to understand Heraclitus' saying that you cannot step twice in the same river. + +You cannot see a person twice - the same person — because nothing is static. Everything +is river-like, flowing and flowing and flowing. If you are freed from the past and you +have a look which can see the present, you will enter the existence. And this entry will be +double: you will enter into everything, into its spirit, and you will enter into yourself also +because the present is the door. All meditations in one way or the other try to get you to +live in the present. So this technique is one of the most beautiful techniques — and easy. +You can try it, and without any danger. + +If you are looking afresh even when passing through the same street again, it is a new + + + +street. + + +Meeting the same friend as if he is a stranger, looking at your wife as you looked for the +first time when she was a stranger, can you really say that he or she is not still a stranger? +You may have lived for twenty years or thirty years or forty years with your wife, but can +you say that you are acquainted with her? She is still a stranger: you are two strangers +living together. You know the outer habits of each other, the outer reactions, but the inner +core of the being is unknown, untouched. + +Look freshly again, as if for the first time, and you will see the same stranger. Nothing, +nothing, has become old; everything is new. This will give a freshness to your look. Your +eyes will become innocent. Those innocent eyes can see. Those innocent eyes can enter +into the inner world. + +THE END. + + + +Chapter 22: The third eye and psychic eye power + + +The first question: + +Question 1 + +EXPLAIN THE RELATIONSHIP OF THE TWO EYES WITH THE THIRD EYE. IN +WHICH WAY DO THE TECHNIQUES CONCERNED WITH LOOKING AFFECT +THE THIRD EYE? + +Firstly, two points are to be understood. One, the energy of the third eye is really the +same as that which moves in the two ordinary eyes — the same energy. It begins to move +in a new center. The third eye is already there, but non-functioning, and it cannot see +unless these ordinary eyes become unseeing. + +The same energy has to move in it. When the energy is not moving in the two eyes it can +move in the third, and when it moves in the third the two eyes will become unseeing. + +They will be there, but you won’t be able to see through them. That energy that looks +through them will be absent; it will move through a new center. That center is between +these two eyes. It is already there, complete; any moment it can function. But it needs +energy to function, and that same energy has to be diverted. + +Secondly, when you are seeing through the two eyes, you are seeing through the physical +body. The third eye is not really a part of the physical body. It is part of the second body +which is hidden — the subtle body, the SUKSHMA SHARIR. It has a corresponding spot +in the physical body, but it is not part of it. That is why physiology cannot believe that +there exists a third eye or anything like it, because your skull can be analyzed, penetrated, +x-rayed, and there is no point, no physical entity which can be said to be the third eye. + +The third eye is part of the subtle body, the sukshma sharir. + +When you die your physical body dies, but your sukshma sharir, your subtle body, moves +with you; it takes another birth. Unless the subtle body dies, you can never be freed from +the circle of birth-death, rebirth-redeath. The circle moves on. + +The third eye belongs to the subtle body. When the energy is moving through the +physical body, you are looking through the physical eyes. That is why through the +physical eyes you cannot look at anything other than the physical, than the material. The +two eyes are physical. Through these eyes you cannot look at anything, cannot see +anything which is not physical. + +Only with the third eye functioning can you enter a different dimension. Now you can see +things which are invisible to the physical eyes, but are visible to the subtle eyes. Then, +with the third eye functioning, if you look at a person you look at his soul, at his spirit, +not at his body — just like you look at the physical body through the physical eyes, but +you cannot see the soul. The same happens when you look through the third eye: you +look and the body is not there, just the one who resides in the body. + +Remember these two points. Firstly, the same energy has to move. It has to be taken +away from the ordinary physical eyes and allowed to move through the third eye. +Secondly, the third eye is not part of the physical body. + +It is part of the subtle body, the second body that is within. Because it is part of the subtle +body, the moment you can look through it you look at the subtle world. You are sitting +here. If a ghost is sitting here you cannot see it, but if your third eye is functioning you +will see the ghost, because subtle existence can be seen only through the subtle eye. + + + +How is the third eye related with this technique of looking? It is deeply related. Really, +this technique is to open the third eye. If your two eyes stop completely, if they become +non-moving, static, like stones, with no movement in these eyes, the energy stops flowing +through them. If you stop them, the energy stops flowing through them. The energy +flows; that is why they move. The vibration, the movement, is because of the energy. If +the energy is not moving, your eyes will become just like a dead man’s eyes — stoney, +dead. + +Looking at a spot, staring at it without allowing your eyes to move anywhere else, will +give a staticness. Suddenly the energy which was moving through the two eyes will not +be moving through these eyes. And energy has to move; energy cannot be static. Eyes +can be static, but energy cannot be static. When these eyes are closed to the energy, if +suddenly the doors are closed and the energy cannot move through these eyes, it tries to +find a new path. And the third eye is just near, just between the two eyebrows, half an +inch deep. + +It is just near — the nearest point. + +If your energy is released from these eyes, the first thing that can happen is that it will +move through the third eye. It is just as if water is flowing and you close one hole: it will +find another — the nearest which can be found with the least resistance. It will find it +automatically; you do not have to do anything specifically. With these physical eyes, you +just have to stop energy from moving through them, and then energy will find its own +path and it will move through the third eye. + +This movement through the third eye transforms you into a different world. You start +seeing things you have never seen, you start feeling things you have never felt, you start +smelling things you have never smelled. A new world, a subtle world, starts functioning. +It is already there. The eye is there; the world, the subtle world, is already there. Both are +there, but not revealed. + +Once you function in that dimension, many things become apparent to you. For example, +if a person is going to die, if your third eye is functioning you will become immediately +aware that he is going to die. No physical analysis, no physical diagnosis can say that +certainly he is going to die. At the most, we can talk about probabilities. We can say +perhaps he will die, and this statement will be conditional: "If such and such remains the +case, he may die; if something can be done he may not die." + + +Medical diagnosis cannot yet be certain about death. Why? So much development and +yet so much uncertainty about death! Really, medical science is trying to deduce death, to +infer death, through physical symptoms, and death is a subtle phenomenon, not physical. +It is an invisible phenomenon of a different dimension. But with the third eye +functioning, you suddenly feel that a man is going to die. How do you feel it? Death has +an impact. If the man is going to die, then death has already cast its shadow there, and +that shadow can be felt with the third eye at any time. + +When a child is born, those who have had much deep practice using the third eye can see +the time of his death that very moment. But then the shadow is very subtle. When a +person is going to die in six months, then anyone whose third eye functions a little can +see the death six months before it comes. The shadow darkens. Really, around you a dark +shadow settles down and that can be felt, but not with these two eyes. + +With the third eye, you begin to see auras. A person comes to you; he cannot deceive + + + +you, because whatever he says is meaningless unless it corresponds to his aura. He may +say he is a person who never gets angry, but the red aura will show that he is filled with +anger. He cannot deceive as far as his aura is concerned, because he is completely +unaware about the aura. Whatsoever he says can be judged through his aura, whether it is +right or wrong. + +With the third eye you start seeing radiations, auras. + +In the old days, that was how someone was initiated. Unless the aura was right, the +master would wait, because your wish fulfillment was not the question. You may have +wanted to be initiated, but that was not enough unless your aura said that you were ready. +So for years the disciple had to wait until the aura was ready; it had nothing to do with +his desire to be initiated — that is futile. Sometimes even for lives, one had to wait. + +For example, Buddha resisted the temptation to initiate women for many years. So much +pressure was put upon him; still he would reject this. Ultimately he agreed to initiate +women, but then he said, "Now my religion will not be alive after five hundred years; I +have compromised. But because you are forcing me, I will initiate women." + +What was the reason why he would not initiate women? One basic reason was this: with +man, sexual energy can be regulated very easily. A man can become a celibate very +easily. With a woman’s body it is difficult because menses is a regular phenomenon — +unconscious, uncontrollable, non-voluntary. Semen ejaculation can be controlled, but +menses cannot be controlled. Or, if one tries to control it, then it will have very bad +effects on the body. + +The moment a woman enters her period of menses, her aura changes completely: it +becomes sexual, aggressive, depressed, all that is negative surrounds the woman, and this +happens every month. + +Only because of this Buddha was not ready to initiate women. He said that it was difficult +because every month the menses moves in a circle, periodically, and nothing can be done +voluntarily. Something can be done, but it was difficult to do that in Buddha's time. Now +it can be done. + +Mahavir completely denied any possibility of a woman being liberated from a woman's +body. He said that a woman has to be born again as a man, and only then can she be +liberated. So all the effort should be channelled for a woman to enter a new birth as a +man. Why? It was a problem of the aura. + +If you initiate a woman, every month she will fall down and the whole effort will be lost. +There was no discrimination, no evaluation about whether or not woman and man are +equal; that was not the question. But for Mahavir the question was this: how to help? So +he found an easier way: to help a woman to be reborn as a man. That was easier. It meant +that a woman had to wait for another life, and the whole effort had to be directed toward +the goal that she should be bom in a male body. + +This appeared easier to Mahavir than to initiate a woman, because every month she +comes back down to the original state and all effort is lost. But these two thousand years +have done much. Particularly, tantra has done much. + +Tantra has found different doors, and tantra is the only system in the world which makes +no differentiation between man and woman. + +Rather, on the contrary, it says that a woman can become easily liberated, and the reason +is the same, only looked at from a different angle. Tantra says that because a woman’s + + + +body is periodically regulated, she can detach herself from her body more easily than +man. Because man's mind is more involved in the body, that is why he can regulate it. +Man's mind is more involved in the body; that is why he can control his sex. + +Woman’s mind is not so involved in the body. The body functions as an automata — +different, on a different layer, and the woman cannot do anything about it. It is like an +automatic mechanism; it goes on. Tantra says that because of this woman can detach +herself from her body very easily. And if this becomes possible — this detachment, this +gap — then there is no problem. + +So it is a very paradoxical thing: if a woman decides to be celibate and to detach herself +from her body, she can maintain her purity more easily than a man. Once the detachment +is there, then she can forget the body completely. Man can detach himself very easily, +can control very easily, but his mind is more involved in the body. That is why he can +control, but then he will have to control every day, continuously. And because feminine +sex is passive, it is very easy for a woman to be relaxed about sex. Man's sex is active. It +is easy for him to control it, but difficult for him to relax about it. + + +So tantra has been trying to find many, many ways, and tantra is the only system which +says there is no difference, that even a feminine structure can be used. So tantra is the +only path which gives women equal status. Otherwise, every religion, whatsoever it may +say, deep down feels that women are inferior. It may be Christianity, it may be Islam, it +may be Jainism, it may be Buddhism, but deep down it feels this, and the reason is the +diagnosis through the third eye, the aura — the forming of the aura every month at the +time of menses. + +With the third eye you become capable of seeing things which are there, but which +cannot be seen with ordinary eyes. All the methods about looking affect the third eye, +because looking means a certain energy moving outward from you toward the world. If +blocked, if suddenly blocked, the energy will find another path, and the third eye is just +near. + +In Tibet there were even surgical operations for the third eye. Sometimes it happens that +your third eye is blocked because you have not used it for millennia. If the third eye is +blocked and you stop your eyes, you will feel a certain uneasiness because the energy is +there and there is no path where to move. In Tibet they devised certain operations to have +the passage cleared. This can be done. And if it is not done, then many things can happen. +Just two or three days before, one sannyasin — she is here — came to me. + +She said, "There is a very hot sensation at the third eye." And not only was there the +sensation, the skin had become burned as if really someone had burned it from the +outside. The sensation, the burning, was inside, but the skin was affected. It became +completely burned. She was afraid — what had happened? The feeling was pleasant, the +warmth was very pleasant as if something were melting. Something was happening, but +even the physical body had become affected, as if actual fire had touched it. + +The reason? The third eye had started functioning, the energy began to move in it. It had +been cold for lives together; energy never moved through it. When for the first time +energy moves there is the warmth. When for the first time energy moves there is the +burning sensation. And because the passage has to be created and forced, it may become +like fire. It is concentrated energy hammering on the third eye. + +In India we have been using sandalwood powder and other things, ghee and other things, + + + +just on the third eye spot. We call this mark a TILAK. It is put just on the third eye spot +in order to give a certain coolness from the outside. So if wannth comes within and fire +moves within, it should not affect the skin outside. Not only can the skin be burnt by it, +sometimes even holes have appeared on the skull. + +I was reading one of the most penetrating books about one of the very deep mysteries of +human existence on the earth. + +There have always been proposals that man came from some other star, because there +seems to be no possibility that man suddenly evolved on earth. There seems to be no +possibility really that man could have evolved from a baboon or a chimpanzee. And there +has been no link, because if man evolved from the chimpanzee to be man, there must be +li nk s — something that is between man and chimpanzee — but there is no such thing. With +all the available data and discoveries, we have not yet found a single body structure, a +skull or anything, which we can say is a link between the chimpanzee and man. + +Evolution means steps. A chimpanzee cannot suddenly become a man — stages must have +been followed. But there is no proof, so Darwin’s theory remains a hypothesis. There are +no in-between li nk s. + +So there have always been fantastic proposals that man must have appeared on the earth +suddenly. A man's skull dating very far back, a hundred thousand years back, has been +found. But in comparison with other skulls there is nothing lacking in it. It is the same +type of skull, with the same brain, with the same structure. We have not evolved really as +far as mind structure is concerned. + +So it seems man suddenly appeared on earth. He must have come from some other planet. +For example, now we are traveling into space, and if we find some planet worth living +upon we will populate it; then suddenly man will appear there. + +I was reading a book about such a proposal, and the author has been finding many things +to help his hypothesis. + +There is one thing that I wanted to tell you about in connection with this matter of +looking. He has found one skull in Mexico and one in Tibet. Both of these skulls have +holes at the third eye spot, and the holes are such that they could only have been made by +a gun bullet. The skulls are at least one-half million to one million years old. If the holes +were made by an arrow, they could not be round. They are so round that they could not +have been made by an arrow; only a bullet could make such holes. So that author tries to +prove by this that bullets existed one million years before. Otherwise how were these two +men killed? + +But really, that doesn’t prove anything about bullets. Whenever the third eye is blocked +completely and the energy moves suddenly, this hole can appear. The energy is just like a +bullet coming from within — just like a bullet. It is concentrated fire; it will create a hole. +Those two skulls with holes show not that those men were killed by bullets, but simply +that there was a third eye phenomenon. The third eye was blocked completely; energy +became concentrated. The eyes were stopped completely; energy could not move, and it +became fire. Then it exploded. Just so that there would not be such an accident, in Tibet +they discovered and devised methods to make a hole so that the energy could move +easily. + + +So whenever you are trying this looking, remember this: if you feel a burning sensation, + + + +do not be afraid. But if you feel that the energy has become a great fire as if a live bullet +is there and wants to penetrate the skull — stop the method and come immediately to me. +Do not do it further. If you feel as if a bullet is there and it wants to penetrate the skull, +stop. Open your eyes and move them as much as you can. Immediately the sensation will +drop, the energy will have moved through the eyes. And unless I say something to you do +not proceed, because sometimes it has happened that the skull is broken. + +Nothing is wrong even if it happens. Even if one dies in it nothing is wrong, because one +has achieved something which is beyond death. But just to be safe, stop whenever you +feel that something wrong can happen — with any method, not only with this. With any +method, if you feel something wrong is possible, stop. + +In India now, many methods are being taught and many, many seekers suffer +unnecessarily, because those who teach are not even aware of the dangers. And those +who follow, they follow in a blind way. They do not know where they are moving or +what they are doing. + +I am talking about these one hundred and twelve methods specifically because of this — +so that you become aware of all the methods, all the possibilities, the dangers, and so that +you can then find out which will suit you best. + +Then if you proceed in any method, you will be fully aware of what can happen, what +you have to be aware of, and when something happens how you have to tackle it. + +The second question: + +Question 2 + +IT IS OBSERVED THAT THE PRACTITIONERS OF PSYCHIC SCIENCES +POSSESS TENSE AND FEARFUL EYES. EXPLAIN WHAT THIS INDICATES AND +HOW TO OVERCOME THIS PHENOMENON. + +Those who practice hypnotism, mesmerism, magnetism, or things like this, will have +very tense eyes — obviously, because they are trying to move their energy through the +eyes forcibly. They are bringing their total energy near the eyes just to influence, impress +or dominate someone. Their eyes will become tense because then their eyes are flooded +with energy, more than they can tolerate. Their eyes will be red, tense, and if you look at +them you will feel a sudden shivering: they are using their eyes in a very political way. If +they look at you, they are sending their energy to dominate you. And through eyes, +domination is very easy. + +This was the case with Rasputin, who dominated Russia, before Lenin, just through his +eyes. He was an ordinary peasant, uneducated, but with very magnetic eyes, and he came +to know how to use this. The moment he would look at you, you would forget yourself, +and in that moment he could send any suggestion to you telepathically and you would +follow it. That is how he dominated the Czar and the Czarina, the royal family, and +through them, the whole Russia. + +Nothing could be done without his will. + +You can have those eyes also; it is not difficult. You have just to leam how to bring your +total body energy to the eyes. They become flooded, and then, whenever you look at +someone your energy starts flowing toward him. It envelopes the person, penetrates his +mind, and in this flooded shock his thinking stops. And this is not a very rare thing that +happens just with man, it happens all over the animal kingdom. There are many animals +who will just look at their prey, and if the prey looks at them he is done for. Then the +prey's eyes become fixed; he cannot move, he cannot escape. + + + +Hunters know this well, and hunters develop very powerful eyes because they are always +in search in the darkness for animals. Their eyes become powerful. Thieves and hunters +by and by gather more energy in their eyes automatically, because of their work. + +Suddenly a lion comes before a hunter, and he is without weapons and he cannot do +anything. Then this is what has been done always: the hunter can stare into the eyes of +the lion, and now it will depend on whether he has more magnetic eyes or the lion. If the +lion is less magnetic and the hunter can bring his total energy to his eyes... And it is easy, +he can do this, because when death is there one can do anything. When death is there the +hunter can put his total energy at stake. If the hunter can look directly into the eyes of the +lion and forget everything and just look, if he can just become the look, then the whole +energy will move from his eyes and the lion will escape. + +He will be trembling with fear. + +Through the eyes you can cause your whole energy to flood out, but when you do that +your eyes will be tense: you will not be able to sleep, you will not be able to relax. So all +those who are trying to dominate others will be restless. If you look at their faces their +eyes will be alive, but their faces will be dead. Look at any hypnotist: his eyes will be +very much alive, but his face will be dead, because his eyes are sucking the whole energy +and nothing is left anywhere else. + +Do not do this because it is useless to dominate anyone. The only useful thing is to +dominate yourself. It is useless, a wastage of your energy. Nothing is achieved through it +— just an egoistic feeling that you can dominate. So this is evil, a black art. That is the +difference between black magic and white magic. Black magic means using your energy, +wasting it, in dominating others. White magic means using the same methods, but using +your energy in dominating your own life, becoming a master of yourself. + +And remember, sometimes similarities happen... If a Buddha moves amongst you, you +will be dominated by him, although he is not dominating you. He is not trying to +dominate you, but you will be dominated because he is the master of himself. And he is +such a master that all around him whosoever moves will become a slave. But there is no +conscious effort on his part. + +Rather, on the contrary, he will continually insist, "Be your own master — remember +this." And this insistence is because of this knowledge. + +Buddha knows that whosoever comes around him will become a slave. He is not doing +anything; he is not trying to dominate anyone, but he knows this will happen. His last +dying words were, "Be a lamp unto yourself." He was dying, and Ananda asked him, just +a day before his actual death, "When you will be no more, what shall we do?" He said, "It +is good that I shall be no more. Then you can be your own master. Be a lamp unto +yourself; forget me. It is good, because when I am no more you will be freed from my +domination." + +Those who try to dominate others will try in every way to make a slave of you. That is +evil, satanic. Those who become their own masters will help you to become masters, and +they will try in every way to cut their influence. That can be done in many ways. + +For example, I will tell a more recent incident. Ouspensky, the chief disciple of Gurdjieff, +was working under Gurdjieff for ten years. It was very difficult to work under Gurdjieff. +He was a man of infinite magnetism. Whosoever would come around him would be +pulled. + +With such people, either you are pulled or you become afraid and go against them, but + + + +you cannot remain indifferent. You are either for or against; you cannot be indifferent to +such people. + +And that going against is just a safety measure. If you come around a person who is +magnetic, either you will become a slave to him or, just to protect yourself, you will +become an enemy, because that is a protection. + +Ouspensky came to him, stayed with him, worked with him, and there was no theoretical +knowledge to be imparted. He was a man of action. He would give techniques, and one +had to work. Then Ouspensky achieved a certain crystallization. He became an integrated +man; he was transfonned. He was not fully enlightened yet, but he was not fast asleep as +we are. He was in between, just on the verge. + +When you feel that the morning is near, when you start listening to the noises which +indicate morning is near, you are asleep, but not totally asleep. The sleep is just on the +verge of going. You are not yet awake, you may again fall into a sleep. You are just on +the surface, just near awakening. + +And when Ouspensky was just near awakening, he was thinking that now Gurdjieff will +help him more because this was the moment. But suddenly Gurdjieff started behaving in +such a strange way that Ouspensky had to leave. He started up in such strange ways with +him, did such absurd things, contradictory, nonsensical — on the surface — that +Ouspensky had to leave him on his own account. + +Gurdjieff never told him to leave. On his own account he left him, went against him, said +that he had gone mad. + +He started teaching, and he always said, "I am teaching according to Gurdjieff, my +teacher, but now he is mad." He would say, "According to the early Gurdjieff..." He +would not talk about the later Gurdjieff. + +But the basic reason why Gurdjieff did this is deep compassion. That was the moment +when Ouspensky had to be left alone; otherwise he would have become a constant +dependent. The moment came when he had to be thrown out, and in such a way that he +would never become aware that he had been thrown out consciously. + +Such persons like Buddha or Gurdjieff will affect you without their conscious effort and +you will be pulled toward them. But they will try in every way that you are not pulled in +that way: that you are not attracted hypnotically, that you are not dominated by them. + +And they will help to make you masters, standing on your own feet. + +Those who are trying to dominate others, their eyes will be tense, evilish. You will not +feel any innocence in their eyes, you will not feel purity in their eyes. You will feel +attraction, but the attraction will be like alcohol. You will feel a magnetic pull, but the +pull will be not to free you but to enslave you. + +Remember, never use any energy to dominate anyone. Because of this, Buddha, Mahavir, +Jesus, they made it a point, and they went on hammering, that the moment you enter the +spiritual search, be fdled with love for everyone, even for your enemy — because if you +are filled with love you will not be attracted to the inner violence which wants to +dominate. + + +Only love can become an antidote. Otherwise when the energy comes to you and you are +overfilled with it, you will start dominating. This happens every day. I have come across +many, many people... I start helping them, they will grow a little, and the moment they + + + +feel that a certain energy is coming to them they will start dominating others, they will +try now to use it. + +Remember, never use spiritual energy to dominate. You are wasting your efforts. Sooner +or later you will be empty again, and you will fall down suddenly. And this is pure +wastage, but it is very difficult to control it because you become aware that now you can +do certain things. If you touch someone who was ill and he becomes okay, how can you +resist touching others now? How can you resist? + +If you cannot resist, you will waste your energy. Something has happened to you, but +soon you will throw it away unnecessarily. And really, the mind is so cunning that you +may be thinking that you are helping others by healing them. That may be just a cunning +trick of the mind, because if you have no love, how can you be so concerned with others' +diseases, their illnesses, their health? You are not concerned. Really, now this is a power. +If you can heal, you can dominate them. + +You may say, "I am just helping them," but even in your help you are simply trying to +dominate them. Your ego will be fulfilled. + +This will become a food for your ego. So all the old treatises say beware. They say +beware because when the energy comes to you, you are at a dangerous point. You can +waste it, you can throw it away. When you feel any energy, make it a secret; do not allow +anyone to know about it. + +Jesus said, "If your right hand is doing something, do not allow the left hand to know +about it." In the Sufi mystic tradition, they say when energy starts coming, do not even +pray before others, do not go to a mosque with others. Why? When the energy comes and +someone is praying, and there are many persons present, they will feel immediately that +something is happening. So the Sufis say that then you should do your prayers deep in +the night — at midnight — when everyone is asleep and no one can be aware of what is +happening to you. Do not tell anyone what is happening to you. + +But the mind is just a chattering box. If something happens, immediately you will go and +spread the good news that something has happened to you. Then you have wasted it. And +if people are impressed, then all you have gained is their good opinion and nothing else. +This is not a good bargain. Wait! A moment will come when your energy becomes +accumulated; it reaches a point where it becomes integrated, transformed. Then things +will happen around you without your doing anything. And only then can you help others +to be their own masters — when you are your own master. + + +I remember one Sufi mystic, Junnaid. One day a man came to him and he said, "Junnaid, +master, great master, I have come to know your inner secret. People say you have a +golden secret and that you have not told it to anyone until now. I will do anything you +say, but tell me the secret." Junnaid said, "I have been keeping it, hiding it, for thirty +years, so how much time can you wait? You will have to go through a preparation. It is a +thirty-year secret but I will tell it to you. But for how much time will you keep patient?" +The man became afraid, scared. He said, "How long do you suggest?" Junnaid said, "At +least thirty years. It is not too much, I am not asking too much." + +The man said, "Thirty years? I will think it over." Junnaid said, "Then if you come back +again, I will not be ready to give it to you in thirty years. Remember, if you decide just +now, then okay. Otherwise I will also have to think." So the man agreed. + +It is said that he remained for thirty years with Junnaid. Then the last day came, and he + + + +went to Junnaid and said to him, "Now communicate your secret." Junnaid said, "I will +give it to you on one condition: that you will keep it a secret. You are not to tell it to +anyone. This secret must die with you, unknown." + +The man said, "Why have you wasted my whole life? Thirty years I was waiting for the +secret just to tell others, and now there is a condition! Then what is the use of knowing it +if I cannot tell it to others? If you make this condition, then please do not tell it to me; +otherwise it will haunt me, I will know something which I cannot tell to others. + +So be kind enough and do not tell it to me. You have wasted my thirty years. A little life +is left, so let me live it relaxedly. This will be too much, knowing something without +telling it to others." + +Whatsoever you gain through any spiritual method, let it remain secret. Do not go on +spreading it, do not try to use it in any way. Let it remain unused, pure. Only then will it +be used for inner transformation. If you use it outwardly, it is a wastage. + +The third question: + +Question 3 + +YOU MENTIONED THAT RAPID EYE MOVEMENTS INDICATE MENTAL +PROCESSES AND THAT IF EYE MOVEMENTS ARE STOPPED THE MENTAL +PROCESSES WILL ALSO STOP. BUT THIS PHYSIOLOGICAL CONTROL OF THE +MENTAL PROCESSES, THIS STOPPING OF EYE MOVEMENTS, SEEMS TO +CREATE PSYCHIC TENSIONS SUCH AS HAPPENS WHEN WE KEEP OUR EYES +CLOSED UNDER A BLINDFOLD FOR A LONG TIME. + +Firstly, your mind and your body are not two things as far as tantra is concerned. +Remember that always. Do not say, "physiological process" and "mental process." They +are not two — just two parts of one whole. Whatsoever you do physiologically affects the +mind. Whatsoever you do psychologically affects the body. They are not two, they are +one. + +You can say that the body is a solid state of the same energy and the mind is a liquid state +of the same energy — of the same energy! So no matter what you are doing +physiologically, do not think that this is just physiological. + +Do not wonder how it is going to help any transfonnation in the mind. If you take +alcohol, what happens to your mind? Alcohol is taken in the body, not in the mind, but +what happens to the mind? If you take LSD, it goes into the body, not into the mind, but +what happens to the mind? + +Or if you go on a fast, fasting is done by the body, but what happens to the mind? Or +from the other end: if you think sexual thoughts, what happens to your body? The body is +affected immediately. You think in the mind of a sex object and your body starts getting +ready. + +There was a theory by William James. In the first part of this century it apparently looked +very absurd, but in a sense it is right. He and another scientist named Lange proposed this +theory which is known as the James-Lange theory. Ordinarily, we say you are afraid and +that is why you escape and run away, or you are angry and that is why your eyes get red +and you start beating your enemy. + +But James and Lange proposed quite the contrary. They said that because you run away, +that is why you feel fear; and because your eyes get red and you start beating your +enemy, you feel anger. It is just the opposite. They said that if this is not so, then we want +to see even one instance of anger when the eyes are not red and the body is not affected + + + +and one is simply angry. Do not allow your body to be affected and try to be angry — +then you will know that you cannot be angry. + + +In Japan they teach their children a very simple method of controlling anger. They say, +whenever you feel angry, do not do anything with the anger, just start taking deep +breaths. Try it, and you will not be able to get angry. Why? Just because you take deep +breaths, why can you not get angry? It becomes impossible to get angry. Two reasons... +You start taking deep breaths but anger needs a particular rhythm of breathing. Without +that rhythm anger is not possible. A particular rhythm in breathing or chaotic breathing is +needed for anger to be. + +If you start taking deep breaths it is impossible for the anger to come out. If you are +consciously taking deep breaths, then the anger cannot express itself. It needs a different +breathing which should be allowed. Y ou need not do it; the anger will do it itself. With +deep breathing you cannot be angry. + +And secondly, your mind shifts. When you feel angry and you start to take deep breaths; +your mind is shifted from anger to breathing. The body is not in a state to be angry, and +the mind has shifted its concentration toward something else. Then it is difficult to be +angry. That is why the Japanese are the most controlled people on earth. It is just a +training from childhood. + +It is difficult anywhere else to find such an incident, but in Japan it happens even today. + +It is happening less and less because Japan is becoming less and less Japanese. + +It is becoming more and more Westernized, and the traditional methods and ways are +becoming lost. But it was happening, and it still happens today. + +One of my friends was there in Kyoto, and he wrote me a letter saying, "I have seen such +a beautiful phenomenon today that I want to write about it to you. And when I come +back, I will want to understand how it is possible. One man was struck by a car. He fell +down, stood up, thanked the driver, and went away — he thanked the driver!" + +In Japan it is not difficult. He must have taken a few deep breaths, and then it was +possible. You are transformed into a different attitude, and you can thank even a person +who was just going to kill you, or who has already tried to kill you. + +Physiological processes and psychological processes are not two things, they are one, and +you can start from either pole to affect and change the other. And any science will do +that. For example, tantra believes deeply in the body. Only philosophy is vague, airy, +verbal; it may start from something else. Otherwise, any scientific approach is bound to +start from the body because that is within your reach. If I talk of something which is +beyond your reach, you may listen to it, you may gather it in your memory, you may talk +about it, but nothing happens. You remain the same. Your infonnation is increased, but +not your being. Your knowledge goes on increasing, but your being remains the same +poor mediocrity; nothing happens to it. + + +Remember, the body is what is within your reach; just now you can do something with it +and change your mind through the body. By and by you will become a master of the +body, and then you will become a master of the mind. And when you become a master of +the mind, you will change the mind by and by, and you will be moving beyond it. If the +body changes, you move beyond body. If the mind changes, you move beyond mind. And + + + +always do something which you CAN do. + +For example, you may not be capable of becoming a master of anger, like a Buddha, just +now. How can you? But you can change your breathing and then you can feel the subtle +effect, the change. Do it. If you feel fdled with passion, sexual passion, take a few deep +breaths and feel the effect: the passion will have dispersed. + +Aldous Huxley's wife, Laura Huxley, has written a beautiful book — just simple devices +for doing certain things. If you feel angry, Laura Huxley says, just tighten up your face. +You can tighten in such a way — for example, in your closet — so that no one will be able +to see. + +A person is sitting just in front of you and you feel angry — so just tighten up your face. +Go on tightening it as much as you can, and then suddenly relax and feel the difference. +The anger will have gone. Or if it has not gone, do it again. Go on doing it — twice, +thrice... What happens? If you tighten your face muscles and you go on tightening and +tensing them, the energy that was going to become anger moves into the face. + + +And it is very easy for it to move into the face. When you are angry, how do you feel? +You feel you want to beat someone with your fists. The energy is there, so use it. If you +can use it, it is dispersed. Your face will become relaxed, and the other person will not +even be able to know that you were angry. It will appear as if nothing has happened to +you. And once you know these things, you become more and more aware that energy can +be transformed, diverted, checked, released, or prevented from being released, or used in +a different way. If you can use your energy you become the master. Then one day you +may not use it at all; you may preserve it. + +This exercise is not good for a Buddha — to clench the fists. This is not good for a +Buddha because this is wasting energy. But this is good for you. At least the other is +saved from you, and a vicious circle is saved. If you get angry he will get angry, and +there is no end to it. It may disturb your whole night, and it may continue as a hangover +for a week. And then, because of this hangover, you may do many things you never +intended to do. Do not say that this is just physiological. You are physiological, so what +can be done? You are a physique; you cannot deny that fact. Use your energy. There is +no need of denying it. + +If you close your eyes, sometimes you may feel a certain tension gathering there, or an +uneasiness. + +Then there are certain things you can do. One, when you close your eyes do not become +tense about it, let them be relaxed. You can close your eyes forcibly — then you will get +tense. Then your eyes will get tired and inside you will feel uneasiness. Relax the face, +relax the eyes, and let them be closed. I say, let them be closed; do not close them. Relax! +Feel relaxed. Drop the eyelids and let the eyes be closed. Do not force them! If you force +them, that is not good. + +If you cannot feel the difference, then do this: first force them to close. Let your whole +face become tense, strained, and then close your eyes forcibly. For a few moments +remain strained, then relax. Then again close your eyes relaxedly. Then you will feel the +difference. Do not strain to do anything — that will tire you. + +Two, when the eyes are closed and your face is relaxed, look as if everything has become +dark. A deep darkness is around you. Imagine you are amidst darkness, in a deep, velvety +darkness, surrounded by it, in a deep, dark night. Go on feeling this darkness. That will + + + +help your eyes to stop their movements. With nothing to be seen, the eyes will stop. Be in +darkness. + +You can do it in a dark room. Open your eyes, look at the darkness, then close them and +feel the darkness. Again open your eyes, feel the darkness; close your eyes, feel it inside. +Darkness is deeply relaxing. + +Darkness is outside and inside you; everything is dead — dark and dead. Both are related. +That is why we paint death as black, dark. All over the world death is painted as black, +and people fear darkness. + +While doing this method, feel darkness, love darkness, and feel inside that you are going +to die. Darkness is all around, and you are dying. The eyes will stop. You will feel that +they cannot move: they will have stopped. In that stopping, suddenly the energy will go +up and start hammering the third eye. When it starts hammering, you will hear it, you will +feel it. A warmth will come, a fire will flow — a liquid fire trying to find a new path. + +Do not be afraid. Help it, cooperate with it, let it move, become it. And when the third +eye opens for the first time, the darkness will disappear and there will be light — light +without a source. You have seen light, but always with a source. Either it comes from the +sun or from the stars or from the moon or from the lamp, but some source is there. + +When your energy moves through the third eye, you will come to know a light without +source. It is not coming from any source, it is simply there, not coming from anywhere. +That is why the Upanishads say that God is not like the sun or like a flame. He is +sourceless light. There is no source anywhere, simply light is there, just as if it is +morning. + +The sun has not arisen, but the night has disappeared. + +In between there is the dawn — the pre-dawn. Or in the evening, the sun has set and the +night has not yet come. Just in between there is the margin. That is why Hindus have +chosen SANDHYA as a proper time for meditation. SANDHYA is the in between time — +neither night nor day, just the line that divides. Why? Just as a symbol. The light is there, +but without a source. The same will happen inside, light will be there without a source. +Wait for it; do not imagine it. + +The last thing to be remembered: you can imagine anything, so it is dangerous to tell you +many things. You can imagine them. You will close the eyes and you will feel and +imagine that now the third eye has opened or is opening, and you can imagine light also. +Do not imagine; resist imagination. Close your eyes. Wait! Whatsoever comes, feel it, +cooperate with it, but wait. Do not jump ahead; otherwise nothing will happen. You will +be having a dream — a beautiful, spiritual dream, but nothing else. + +People go on coming to me and they say, "We have seen this and we have seen that." But +they have imagined it — because if really they had seen, they would be transformed. But +they are not transformed. They are the same persons, only now a spiritual pride is added. +They have some dreams — beautiful, spiritual dreams: someone is seeing Krishna playing +on his flute, someone is seeing light, someone is seeing kundalini rising. + +They go on seeing things, and they remain the same — mediocre, stupid, dull. Nothing +has happened to them; they go on relating that this is happening, that is happening, but +they remain the same — angry, sad, childish, stupid. Nothing has changed. + +If you really see the light which is there waiting for you, to be seen through the third eye, +you will be a different person. And then you need not tell anyone. People will come to + + + +know you are a different person. You cannot even hide it; it will be felt. Wherever you +will move, others will feel that "Something has happened to this man." + +So do not imagine; wait, and let things take their own course. You do the technique, and +then wait. Do not jump ahead. + + +THE END. + + + +Chapter 23: Several more looking methods + + +9. SIMPLY BY LOOKING INTO THE BLUE SKY BEYOND CLOUDS, THE +SERENITY. + +10. LISTEN WHILE THE ULTIMATE MYSTICAL TEACHING IS IMPARTED. + +EYES STILL, WITHOUT BLINKING, AT ONCE BECOME ABSOLUTELY FREE. + +1 1. AT THE EDGE OF A DEEP WELL LOOK STEADILY INTO ITS DEPTHS UNTIL +- THE WONDROUSNESS. + +12. LOOK UPON SOME OBJECT, THEN SLOWLY WITHDRAW YOUR SIGHT +FROM IT, THEN SLOWLY WITHDRAW YOUR THOUGHT FROM IT. THEN. + +We live on the surface of ourselves — just at the fringe, the boundary. The senses are just +on the boundary and your consciousness is way deep down at the center. We live in the +senses; that is natural. But that is not the ultimate flowering, it is just the beginning. And +when we are living in the senses, we are basically concerned with objects, because senses +are irrelevant unless there is concern with some object of enjoyment. For example, eyes +are useless unless there is something to be seen, ears are useless unless there is something +to be heard, and hands are useless unless there is something to be touched. + +We live in the senses; therefore, we have to live in objects. The senses are just on the +boundary of the being, in the body, and objects are not even on the boundary: they are +beyond the boundary. So three points have to be understood before we enter the +techniques. + +First, the consciousness is at the center. Second, the senses through which the +consciousness moves out are at the boundary. + +And third, the objects in the world to which the consciousness moves, through the senses, +are beyond the boundary. These three things have to be remembered: consciousness at +the center, senses at the boundary and objects beyond the boundary. Try to understand it +clearly, because then the techniques will be very simple. + +Look at it from many directions. One: senses are just in between, just in the middle. At +one side is consciousness, at another side is the world of objects. Senses are just in the +middle — between the two. From the senses you can move either way: either you can go +to the objects or you can go to the center. Either way the distance is the same. From the +senses, doors open both ways — move to the objects or move to the center. + +You are at the senses. That is why one of the most famous Zen Masters, Bokuju, has said +that NIRVANA and the world are the same distance away. So do not think that the +nirvana is very far away. The world and the nirvana, this world and that other world, are +both at the same distance. + +This saying has created much confusion because we feel that nirvana is very, very far +away - that Moksha, liberation, the kingdom of God, is very, very far away. We feel that +the world is just near, just here. But Bokuju says, and he says rightly, that both are at the +same distance. + +The world is here, and nirvana is also here. + +The world is near, and nirvana is also near, For nirvana you have to move inwards, for +the objects you have to move outwards; the distance is the same. From my eyes, my +center is just as near as you are near me. I can see you if I move outward, I can see + + + +myself if I move inward. And we are at the doors of the senses, but naturally, the bodily +needs are such that consciousness moves outwards. You need food, you need water to +drink, you need a house where to live. These are your bodily needs and these can only be +found in the world, so quite naturally, consciousness moves through the senses toward +the world. Unless you create a need which can only be fulfilled when you move inward, +you will never move inward. + +For example, if a child were born self-sufficient, if he didn’t need any food, he would not +look at his mother at all. The mother would become irrelevant, meaningless, because for +the child the mother is not the meaning: food is the meaning. The mother is his first food, +and because the mother gives him food and satisfies a basic need, without which he will +die, he starts loving the mother. That love comes secondly, as a shadow, because the +mother is fulfilling a basic need. + +So those mothers who are feeding their children through bottles should not expect much +love because for the child food is the need, not the mother. The mother will come into his +being, enter into his being only through food. + +That is why food and love are deeply related-very, very deeply related. If your love need +is fulfilled, you will need less food. If your love need is not fulfilled, you will need more +food. So those who love and who are loved will not gather much fat. There are other +reasons also, but this is one of the most basic. They will not eat much. If love is not +fulfilled, then food becomes a substitute. Then they will eat much. + +For the child, food is the basic need. But if a child should be born who can be self- +sufficient, who does not need any food, who does not need any outward help to be alive, +he will not move in the world at all. Do you think he will move? There would be no need. +And unless a need is there, the energy will never move. We move outwardly not because +we are sinners. We move outwardly because we have needs which can be fulfilled only +through objects-which can be gained if we move in the world of objects. + +Why do you not move inward? Because you have not yet created the need to move +inward. Once the need is there, it is as easy to move inward as to move outward. What is +that need? That need is concerned with religion. Y ou cannot be religious unless that need +is there. How is that need created? By what process does one become aware of a deep +need which helps you move inward? + +Three things are to be remembered. Firstly, death. Remember, all life-needs force you to +move outward. + +If you want to move inward, death must become a basic concern; otherwise you cannot +move inward. That is why it happened that persons like Buddha, who became deeply +conscious of death, started moving inward. Only when you become aware of death will +you create the need to look back. + +Life looks outward. Unless you become aware of death, religion is meaningless for you. +That is why animals have no religion. They are alive, they are as much alive as man, or +even more, but they cannot be conscious of death, they cannot conceive of death, they +cannot see death in the future. They see that others are dying, but it never occurs to the +animal mind that this death is an indication of his death also. + +For the animal mind death always occurs to others. And if for you also death is just +something which happens to others, you still live in the animal mind. If you are not aware +of death, you have not yet become man. That is the basic difference between animal and +man-because animal cannot be aware of death, only man can be. If you are not aware of + + + +death you are not a man yet, and only man creates the need to move inward. + +To me, man means awareness of death. I am not saying become afraid of death; that is +not awareness. Just be aware of the fact that death is coming nearer and nearer and you +have to be prepared for it. + +Life has its own needs; death creates its own needs. + +That is why younger societies are irreligious — because younger societies are not yet +aware of the phenomenon of death; it has not become a central concern for them. An +older society — for example, India, one of the oldest societies in existence — is so much +aware of death. Because of that awareness, deep down India is religious. So the first +thing: become aware of death. Think about it, look at it, contemplate it. Do not be afraid, +do not escape the fact. It is there and you cannot escape it! It has come into existence +with you. + +Your death is bom with you; now you cannot escape it. You have hidden it in yourself — +become aware of it. The moment you become aware that you are going to die, that death +is certain, your total mind will start looking in a different dimension. Then food is a basic +need for the body, but not for the being, because even if you get food death will occur. +Food cannot protect you from death, food can only postpone. Food can help you to +postpone. If you get a good shelter, a good house, it will not protect you from death, it +will only help you to die conveniently, comfortably. And death, whether it happens +comfortably or uncomfortably, is the same. + +In life you may be poor or rich, but death is the great equalizer. The greatest communism +is in death. Howsoever you live, it makes no difference; death happens equally. In life, +equality is impossible; in death, inequality is impossible. + +Become aware of it, contemplate it. And it is not only that death is certain somewhere in +the future: with the idea that it is very far away, you will again not be able to contemplate +it. The mind has a very small range; the focus of the mind is very small. You cannot think +beyond thirty years. After thirty years there will be death... it is as if you are not going to +die. Thirty years is so long, the distance is so much, it is as if death is not going to occur. +If you want to contemplate death, know another fact about it: it can occur the next +moment; it is possible the very next moment. You may not be able to hear my whole +sentence, I may not be able to complete it. My mother's father used to tell me that when I +was born he consulted one astrologer, one of the best known astrologers of those days. +The astrologer was to make my KUNDALI — birth chart. But the astrologer studied it +and he said, "If this child survives after seven years, only then will I make the chart. It +seems impossible that he can survive for more than seven years, so it is useless. If the +child is going to die in seven years it is useless to make the kundali; it will be of no use. +And it has been my habit," the astrologer said, "that unless I am certain that the kundali +will be useful I never make it." So he didn’t make it. + +Fortunately, or unfortunately, I survived. Then my mother's father went to the astrologer, +but he was dead, so he never could make my kundali. + +He was dead, and I have been constantly wondering about this. He was aware of the fact +that this child may die, but he was not aware of the fact that he may die. He was not +aware! It seems that he was absolutely unconcerned — and he was no ordinary man. But +no one is concerned with his own death. Knowingly, cunningly, we are not concerned +with it because it creates a fear. So I have always suspected that that astrologer might + + + +have never looked at his own kundali; otherwise he would have become aware. + +Death is possible the very next moment, but the mind will not believe it. I say it and your +mind will say, "No! How is it possible the next moment? It is far away." But that is a +trick. If you postpone, you cannot contemplate. It must be so near that you can focus on +it. And when I say that the next moment it is possible, I mean it. It can happen, and +whenever it will happen it will be the next moment. Just before it, you could not have +conceived that it was going to happen. + +A person is dying: just a moment before he could never have thought that death is so +near. It always happens in the next moment — remember. It has always happened that +way, and this will be the way always. It always happens in the next moment. Bring it near +so that you can focus on it, and that very focusing will help you to enter in, a new need +will be created. + +Secondly, you go on living. + +You go on creating artificial meanings and purposes for this very moment. You never +think of your life as a whole, whether it has any meaning or not. You go on creating new +meanings, and you push yourself on with those meanings. That is why a poor man lives a +more meaningful life than a rich man — because a poor man has many things to get, and +that gives a meaning to his life. If you are really rich, it means you have everything that is +possible and this world cannot offer anything to you. Then your life becomes +meaningless. Now you cannot create any meaning for this moment, for this day, to help +you live. That is why the richer a society, the more affluent a culture, the more +meaninglessness is felt. Poorer societies never feel meaninglessness. + +A poor man is concerned with having a house. For years together he will work for it. His +life has a meaning; something has to be achieved. And when he gets the house he will be +happy for a few days at least, but then bigger houses are there... So he will go on moving, +doing this and that, never thinking about his life as a whole, whether it has any meaning +or not. He never takes life as a whole. + +Just imagine that you have everything — the house, the car that you long for, and all your +dreams are fulfilled. So now what? Just imagine that whatsoever you need is there, you +have it. Now what? Suddenly meaning disappears. + +You are standing on an abyss; nothing can be done. You become meaningless. You are +already meaningless, just not aware. Even if you get the whole world, then what? What is +fulfilled? + +Alexander was coming to India, and he met a great saint, Diogenes. Diogenes was one of +the most penetrating minds ever born. He lived naked like Mahavir; he is the Mahavir of +Greek civilization and culture. He left everything, renounced everything, not because +through renouncing things he was going to get anything — that is not real renouncing, not +authentic renunciation. If you renounce something to get something, that is a bargain. If +you think that you are going to have some reservation in heaven and that is why you +renounce, it is not renunciation. If you renounce the bodily pleasures to have spiritual +pleasures, this is not renunciation. + +Diogenes renounced everything, not because out of it he was going to get something. He +renounced just to see if when he has nothing, whether there is any meaning or not. He +thought that if one possesses nothing, if even then one has a meaning, a purpose, a +destiny, then death cannot annihilate anything, because death can annihilate only a +possessions and the body is also possession. He left everything. He had only one thing: a + + + +wooden bowl out of which to drink water. He thought, "This is not much of a +possession." Then one day he saw a child drinking water with his hands. + +He immediately threw away the bowl. He said, "If a child can drink water with his hands, +am I more weak than a child?" + +When Alexander was coming to India to conquer, to make a world empire, somebody +informed him that just on the way, where he would be stopping, there lived a great sage +who was just the opposite of him. He was told, "You are going to make a world empire, +and he has even thrown away his bowl because he says that as he is happy without it, +why carry this burden? And you say that unless the whole world becomes your empire, +you cannot be happy. So he is just at the opposite pole, and it would be good if you meet +him." + +Alexander was fascinated. It happens that the opposite always fascinates. The opposite +always fascinates; it has a deep sexual attraction. Just a man is attracted to woman or +woman is attracted to man, there is the same attraction with the opposite. Alexander +could not by-pass Diogenes, but it was not good for him to go to Diogenes, and it was +impossible that Diogenes would come to him — there was no solution. + +Diogenes was informed. Many, many messengers came to inform him that "The Great +Alexander is passing this way. It would be good if you meet him." He said, "The Great +Alexander? Who has said this to you! I think he himself has. So tell your Great +Alexander that he has nothing to give to me, and there is no need for him to meet me — +and I am a very small man." + +He used to say, "Really, I am a dog, not a man at all — just a dog, so there is no need. It is +below his dignity to meet this dog." + +Then Alexander had to come. Diogenes is reported to have said, "I hear you are going to +win the whole world, so I thought, I closed my eyes and thought, ’Okay! If I have won the +whole world, then what?' This has been my problem constantly: if I have won the whole +world, then what?" It is reported that Alexander, after hearing this, became very sad. +"Then what?" he said to Diogenes. "Do not talk such things. You make me very sad." +Diogenes said, "But you will become very sad when you win the whole world. What can +I do? I am just imagining, and I have come to conclude that this is useless. You are +making a suicidal effort. You yourself are trying to win the whole world — so then what? +If you succeed, then what? " + +Alexander returned from Diogenes very disturbed, upset, sad. He said to his companions, +"This man is very dangerous. He has shattered my dreams." And he could never forget, +could never forgive Diogenes. The day he died, he remembered him again, and he said, + +"It may be that that fellow was right: then what ?" + +So the next thing is to remember always that whatsoever you are doing, whatsoever you +are achieving, remember to ask, "If I succeed, then what?" Is there any meaning in it all, +or is there just some artificial meaning given by you only to divide, to create an illusion +around you so that you feel you are doing something worthwhile — and all the time you +are really wasting life and energy, not doing anything worthwhile! There is only one +thing worthwhile: if you can become happy without anything, without any dependence: if +you can be blissful alone, totally alone. + +If nothing is needed for your bliss, only then can you be blissful; otherwise you will be in +misery, always in misery. + + + +Dependence is misery, and those who depend on possessions, those who depend on +accumulated knowledge, those who depend on this or that, they are helping their own +misery to become accumulated more and more. So the next point to remember is to ask +whether you have any meaning, or whether you are just floating along without any +meaning. Are you just making believe that this or that is the meaning of your existence? +One man used to come to me. He used to say that if his son gets into college, that would +be all and he would be very happy. He was a poor man, a very ordinary clerk, and that +was the only dream, that his son would get into college. Then the son got into college. +Now the son has become a forest official. A few months back the son was here and he +told me, "I am getting only six hundred rupees per month. I have two children and this is +my only dream, that they can get a good education; that is all. I am working hard. If they +can be well educated and if I can send one of my children to some foreign country to +study, that is all I ask." + +His father is no more; he has died. This was his meaning in life, his purpose — to make +his boy educated and well placed. Now the boy is well placed, and now the boy has the +same purpose, to help his children become educated and well placed. + +And he will die, and those children will go on doing the same nonsense. + +What is the meaning of all this? What are you doing? Just passing time? Just destroying +life? Or have you got some authentic meaning which you can say makes you happy, +blissful? This is the second consideration which will turn you inward. + +And thirdly, man goes on forgetting. You go on forgetting things. You were angry +yesterday, and you repented it. Now you have forgotten, and if the same stimulus is given +again, you will be angry again. This has been so for your whole life: you go on repeating +the same things. + +It is said that it is very extraordinary to find a man who learns through life — very rare. +Really, no one learns. If you learn, then you cannot commit the same mistake twice. But +you go on committing the same thing again and again. Rather, the more you commit, the +more you become prone to commit it. You are angry again and again, and again and +again you repent it, and you have not learned anything. Given the stimulus, you will be +angry, and you will do the same madness, and then you will repent again — that is also +part of it. And then you will again be ready to be stimulated and to be angry. + +The third thing: if you want to turn in, learn! Whatsoever you are doing, learn through it. +Take the essential out of it. Look back at what have you been doing with your life and +your energy and your time. + +The same mistakes, the same foolishnesses, the same stupidities, again and again. + +So you move in a wheel. However, it is not good to say that you move the wheel: rather, +the wheel moves you. Mechanically, you go on and on and on. That is why in India we +have called the world SANSAR. SANSAR means the wheel which goes on, and you are +just clinging to some spoke on it and you go on moving. + +Unless you learn something about this wheel, this vicious circle, this sansar, unless you +learn something about it, you will not leave the spoke and jump out of it. So three words, +three key words: + +Death: make it a constant contemplation. + +Meaning: go on searching for it in your life. + +And leam: learn through your life, because there is no other learning. Scriptures won’t +give you anything. + + + +If your own life cannot give you something, nothing can give it to you. Learn through +your own life, conclude through it. What have you been doing with yourself? If you are +in a wheel, jump out of it. But to know that you are in a wheel, you will have to go deep +into understanding and learning. These three things will help you to turn in. + +Now the techniques: + +SIMPLY BY LOOKING INTO THE BLUE SKY BEYOND CLOUDS, THE +SERENITY. + +That is why I have said so many things — because the techniques are very easy, and you +can do them and nothing will result. + +Then you will say, "What type of techniques are these? We can do them, they are so +simple. SIMPLY BY LOOKING INTO THE SKY, THE BLUE SKY, BEYOND THE +CLOUDS, THE SERENITY: one will become silent and serene, fulfilled." + +You can look at the blue sky beyond the clouds and nothing will happen. Then you will +say, "What type of technique is this? Shiva is not talking rationally, reasonably. He is +saying anything, whatsoever comes to his mind. What kind of technique is this — +SIMPLY BY LOOKING INTO THE BLUE SKY BEYOND CLOUDS, THE +SERENITY. One will become serene!" + +But if you remember: death, meaning, learning, this technique will help you immediately +to turn in. LOOKING INTO THE BLUE SKY BEYOND CLOUDS... Just looking, not +thinking. The sky is infinite; it ends nowhere. Just look into it. There is no object; that is +why the sky is chosen. The sky is not an object. Linguistically it is; existentially, the sky +is not an object because an object begins and ends. You can go around an object; you +cannot go around the sky. You are in the sky, but you cannot go around it. So you may be +the object for the sky, but the sky cannot be your object. You can look into it, but you +cannot look at it, and that looking into it goes on and on... it never ends. + +So look into the blue sky and go on looking. The object is infinite, there is no boundary +to it. Do not think about it; do not say it is beautiful. + +Do not say, "How lovely!" Do not appreciate the color; do not start thinking. If you start +thinking, you have stopped. Now your eyes are not moving into the blue, the infinite +blue. Just move, just look — do not think. Do not create words; they will become barriers. +Not even "blue sky" should be said. Do not verbalize. + +There should be just a pure, innocent look into the blue sky. It never ends. You will go on +and on and on and on, and suddenly, because there is no object, just a vacuum, suddenly +you will become aware of yourself. Why? Because if there is any vacuum your senses +become useless. Senses are only useful if there is an object. + +If you are looking at a flower, then you are looking at something — the flower is there. +The sky is not there. What do we mean by a sky? That which is not there. Sky means the +space. All objects are in the sky, but the sky is not an object. It is just the vacuum, the +space in which objects can exist. The sky itself is just pure emptiness. Look at this pure +emptiness. That is why the sutra says: BEYOND THE CLOUDS. Because clouds are not +the sky, they are objects floating in the sky. You can look at the clouds, but that will not +help. Look into the blue sky — not at the stars, not at the moon, not at the clouds, but at +objectlessness, emptiness. Look into it. + +What will happen? In emptiness, there is no object to be grasped by the senses. + + + +Because there is no object to be grasped, clung to, senses become futile. And if you are +looking into the blue sky without thinking, without thinking, suddenly you will feel that +everything has disappeared; there is nothing. In that disappearance you will become +aware of yourself. Looking into this emptiness, you will become empty. Why? Because +your eyes are like a mirror. Whatsoever is before them is reflected. I see you and you are +sad — then a sudden sadness enters into me. If a sad person enters into your room, you +become sad. What has happened? You have looked at sadness. You are like a mirror: the +sadness is reflected in you. + +Someone laughs heartily — suddenly you feel a laughter coming to you also. It has +become infectious. What has happened? You are like a mirror, you are reflecting things. +You look at a beautiful object — it is reflected in you. You look at an ugly object — it is +reflected in you. Whatsoever you are seeing penetrates deep into you. It becomes part of +your consciousness. + +If you are looking into the emptiness, there is nothing to be reflected - or only the blue +infinite sky. If it is reflected, if you feel the blue infinite sky within, you will become +serene, you will find serenity. That is there. And if really you can conceive of emptiness - +where sky, blue, everything disappears: just at emptiness - inside also emptiness will be +reflected. + +And in emptiness, how can you be worried, how can you be tense? + +In emptiness, how can the mind function? It stops; it disappears. In the disappearance of +the mind - the mind that is tense, worried, filled with thoughts that are relevant, irrelevant +- in that disappearance of the mind, THE SERENITY. + +One thing more. Emptiness, if reflected in, becomes desirelessness. Desire is tension. + +You desire and you become worried. You look at a beautiful woman — a sudden desire +arises. You look at a beautiful house — you want to possess it. You look at a beautiful car +just passing by your side — you want to be in it, you want to drive it. A desire has come +in, and with the desire mind becomes worried: "How to get it? What to do to get it?" The +mind becomes frustrated or hopeless or hopeful, but it is all dreaming. Many things can +happen. + +When desire is there, you are disturbed. The mind is shattered into fragments, and many +plans, dreams, projections start; you become mad. Desire is the seed of madness. + +But emptiness is not an object; it is just emptiness. When you look at emptiness, no +desire arises; it cannot arise. You do not want to possess emptiness, you do not want to +love emptiness, you do not want to make a house out of it. Emptiness? You cannot do +anything with it! All movement of the mind stops, no desire arises, and with the non- +arising of desire, THE SERENITY. + +You become silent, serene. A sudden peace explodes in you. You have become like the +sky. + +Another thing. Whatsoever you contemplate, you become like it, you become that, +because mind can take infinite forms. Whatsoever you desire, your mind takes its form, +you become it. That is why a person who is just after riches, gold, after money, his mind +becomes just a treasure - nothing else. Shake him, and you will feel the rupees inside - +the sound of rupees, nothing else. Whatsoever you desire, you become that. So be +conscious of what you are desiring because you are becoming that. + +The sky is the most empty thing. It is just near you and it costs nothing, and you do not +have to go somewhere — to the Himalayas or to Tibet — to find the sky. They have + + + +destroyed everything, technology has destroyed everything, but the sky is still there; you +can use it. Use it before they destroy it — any day they will destroy it. Look, penetrate +into it. And the look must be a non-thinking one, remember this. Then you will feel the +same sky within, the same dimension within, the same space and blueness and emptiness. +That is why Shiva says, SIMPLY. + +SIMPLY BY LOOKING INTO THE BLUE SKY BEYOND CLOUDS, THE +SERENITY. + +The next technique: + +LISTEN WHILE THE ULTIMATE MYSTICAL TEACHING IS IMPARTED. EYES +STILL, WITHOUT WINKING, AT ONCE BECOME ABSOLUTELY FREE." + +LISTEN WHILE THE ULTIMATE MYSTICAL TEACHING IS IMPARTED. This is a +secret method. In this esoteric tantra, the master gives you the teaching secretly, the +doctrine secretly — or the mantra secretly. When the disciple is ready, then the mantra, or +the supreme secret, will be imparted, communicated to him, privately. Just in his ear it +will be whispered. This technique is concerned with that whispering. LISTEN WHILE +THE ULTIMATE MYSTICAL TEACHING IS IMPARTED. + +When the master has decided that now you are ready and the secret of his own experience +can be communicated, when the moment has come when he can say to you that which is +unsayable, then this technique has to be used. EYES STILL, WITHOUT WINKING, AT +ONCE BECOME ABSOLUTELY FREE. When master, is imparting his secret to you in +your ear, whispering it, let your eyes be totally still: no movement of the eyes. That +means the mind should be quiet, thoughtless. + +No winking — not even a slight movement, because that will show a disturbance within. +Just become an empty ear with no movement within. The consciousness is just waiting to +be impregnated, just open, receptive, passive... no activity on its own part. And when this +will happen, this moment when you are totally empty, not thinking anything but just +waiting... not waiting for something, because then it will become thinking, not waiting +for something but just waiting; when this static moment, this non-dynamic moment will +happen; when everything has stopped, time is not flowing and mind is totally vacant — it +becomes no-mind. + +Only into a no-mind can a master impart. + +And he is not going to give a very long discourse: he will give just one or two or three +words. In that silence those one, two or three words will penetrate to your very core, to +the very center, and they will become a seed there. In this passive awareness, in this +silence, AT ONCE BECOME ABSOLUTELY FREE. + +One can become free only by becoming free of the mind; there is no other freedom. +Freedom from the mind is the only freedom. Mind is the bondage, the slavery, the +servitude. So a disciple has to wait with his master for the right moment when he will call +him and impart. He is not to ask, because asking means desire. He is not to expect, +because expectation means conditions, desire, mind. He is just to wait. And when he will +be ready, when his waiting will become total, the master can do anything. + +Sometimes the master can do very trivial things, and the thing will happen. And +ordinarily, even if a Shiva goes on talking about one hundred and twelve methods, +nothing will happen because the preparation is not there. You can throw seeds on stones, + + + +but nothing will happen. The fault is not of the seeds. You can throw a seed out of +season, but nothing will happen. The fault is not of the seed. The right season is needed, +the right moment is needed, the right soil is needed. Only then will the seed become alive +and transform. + + +So sometimes very trivial things work. For example, Lin Chi became enlightened while +he was just sitting on his master's verandah - on the verandah of his master, and the +Master came out and just laughed. He looked at Lin Chi - into his eyes - and laughed +uproariously. Lin Chi started laughing, bowed down, and left. But he had been waiting +there for six years: that verandah was his abode for six years. + +The master would come day after day, month after month, and he would not even look at +him. And Lin Chi was waiting there. Then after two years, for the first time he looked at +him. Then two more years passed, and for the first time he patted him. Then Lin Chi +waited and waited, and after six years, one day suddenly he came out, stared into Lin +Chi's eyes, and Lin Chi must have done this technique: LISTEN WHILE THE +ULTIMATE MYSTICAL TEACHING IS IMPARTED. EYES STILL, WITHOUT +WINKING, AT ONCE BECOME ABSOLUTELY FREE. + +The master looked and used laughter as a medium. He was a great master. Really, words +were not needed, just laughter. Suddenly there was that laughter, and something +happened in Lin Chi. He bowed down, laughed, left, and told everyone that now he was +no more, that he was liberated, free. He was no more: that is what liberation means. You +are not liberated. You are liberated from yourself. + +Lin Chi used to tell how it happened. For six years he was waiting. + +It was a long waiting, a patient waiting. He was just waiting on the verandah, and every +day the master would come. And he would wait for the right moment — when he would +become ready, then the master would do something. Just by waiting for six years, you +will fall into meditation. What can you do? He might have thought for a few days about +old things, but if you do not give new food every day to the mind, by and by it stops. + +How long can you chew again and again on the same thing? + +He might have been thinking about past things, and by and by, because no new stimulus +was given, thinking stopped. He was not allowed to read, he was not allowed to talk, he +was not allowed to move and meet anyone. He was just allowed to fulfill the basic bodily +needs and wait on the verandah. + +Silently he waited, day after day — day in, day out, day and night. Summer would come +and pass away, and winter would come and pass away, and there would be rain and it +would pass away: he must have forgotten time. He must have forgotten for how many +days he had been there. And then one day suddenly the master appeared, and he looked +deeply into his eyes. Lin Chi's eyes must have suddenly become static, non-dynamic. + +This was the moment; six years were wasted for this. There was no movement of the +eyes, because a single movement and he may miss. Everything must have become silent +�� and then suddenly, the uproarious laughter: the master began laughing madly. + +That laughter must have been heard deep down at the very core; it must have reached. + +So when Lin Chi was asked, "What happened to you?" he said, "When my master +laughed, suddenly I recognized that the whole world is just a joke. In his laughter, this +was the message: The whole world is just a joke, just a drama. An seriousness + + + +disappeared. And if the whole world is just a joke, who is in bondage? And who needs to +be free?" So Lin Chi said, "There was no bondage at all. I was thinking that I was bound, +and that is why I was trying to be free, and then suddenly the master laughed and the +bondage fell away." + +Sometimes it has happened with such things; you can never conceive of how it was +possible. There are many Zen stories... One Zen master became aware when the gong +was beaten. Just while he was hearing the gong being beaten, the sound, something +shattered in him. One Zen nun became aware, enlightened, while she was carrying two +pails of water. Suddenly the bamboo broke, and the earthen pots fell down. The sound, +the breaking of the pots and the water flowing out of them, and she became enlightened. +What happened? You can break many pots, but nothing will happen. A right moment had +come. She was coming back. Her master had said, "This night I am going to give you the +secret, so go and take a bath, and bring two pails of water for me. I will take a bath and +impart to you the secret for which you have been waiting." + +She must have felt ecstatic — the moment had come. She took a bath, filled the pots, and +carried them back. + +It was a full-moon night, and just when she was passing on the footpath from the river to +the ashram, suddenly the bamboo broke. When she reached, the master was waiting, and +he looked at her and he said, "Now there is no need, it has happened. Now I have nothing +to convey. You have already received." + +That old nun used to say, "With that bamboo breaking, something broke in me — +something broke in me also. Those pails falling down, those broken earthen pots, and I +saw my body broken. I looked at the moon. Everything was silent, serene, and I became +silent and serene. From that moment, I have not been, I am no more." This is what +liberation, freedom means. + +The next technique: + +AT THE EDGE OF A DEEP WELL LOOK STEADILY INTO ITS DEPTHS UNTIL - +THE WONDROUSNESS. + +The techniques are similar, with a slight difference. AT THE EDGE OF A DEEP WELL +LOOK STEADILY INTO ITS DEPTHS UNTIL - THE WONDROUSNESS. Look into +a deep well. The well will be reflected in you. Forget thinking completely; stop thinking +completely. Just go on looking into the depth. Now they say mind has its own depth, like +a well. Now in the West, they are developing depth psychology. They say mind is not just +a surface. It is just a beginning; there are depths — many depths, hidden depths. + + +Look into a well without thinking. The depth will be reflected in you, the well will +become just an outer symbol of the inner depth. And go on looking UNTIL - THE +WONDROUSNESS, until you feel wonder- filled. + +Do not stop before this moment. Go on looking, go on looking, go on looking, day after +day, month after month. Just go to a well, look deep, with no thoughts moving in the +mind. Just meditate. Just meditate on the depth: meditate the depth, become one with it. +Go on meditating; one day your thoughts will not be there. Any moment it can happen. +Suddenly you will feel you have the same well within you, the same depth. And then a +strange, very strange feeling will come to you: you will feel wonder-filled. + +Chuang Tzu was passing over a bridge with his master, Lao Tsu. Lao Tsu is reported to + + + +have said to Chuang Tzu, "Remain here. Go on looking down from this bridge to the +river until the river stops and the bridge starts flowing. Then come to me." The river is +flowing; the bridge never flows. But Chuang Tzu was given this meditation - to wait on +this bridge. It is said he made a hut on the bridge and remained there. Months passed... he +would just sit on the bridge, looking down for the moment when the river would stop and +the bridge would flow. Then he would go to the master. + +One day it happened: the river stopped and the bridge started flowing. + +How can it happen? If thought stops completely, then anything is possible, because +really, it is fixedness of thought which says that the river is flowing and the bridge is +static. This is just relative - just relative! + +Einstein says, and physics says, that everything is relative. You are traveling in a train, a +fast train. What happens? The trees flow by, they run by. And if the train is really smooth +and you do not feel that the train is running, you are just looking through the windows, +the trees are moving, not the train. + +Einstein has said that if in space two trains are running, or two spaceships are running +side by side with the same speed, you will not be able to feel that they are moving. You +can feel a moving train because you see the static things by the side. If there is nothing - +for example, if the trees are also moving in the same direction with the same speed - you +will feel static. Or when a train passes in the opposite direction, your speed is doubled. +You feel your train has become faster. + +It has not become faster. It is the same train with the same speed, but a train going in the +opposite direction gives you the feeling of double speed. If speed is relative, then it is just +a fixedness of the mind to think that the river is flowing and the bridge is static. +Continuously meditating, meditating, meditating, Chuang Tzu came to realize that +everything is relative. + +The river is flowing because you take the bridge as static. The bridge is also flowing deep +down. Nothing is static in this world. Atoms are moving, electrons are moving; the bridge +is a constant movement within. Everything is flowing; the bridge is also flowing. + +Chuang Tzu must have had a glimpse of the atomic structure of the bridge. Now they say +this wall which looks static is not static. Movement is there, every electron is running, +but the movement is so fast you cannot see it. That is why you feel it as static. + +If this fan goes on with a faster movement, faster and faster, you will not be able to see its +wings, the spaces between them. You will not be able to see this. And if it moves with the +speed of light, you will see simply one circular disc that is static. Nothing will be moving +in it because eyes cannot catch that fast movement. + +So Chuang Tzu must have had a glimpse of the atomic structure of the bridge. He waited +and waited, and the fixed mind dissolved. Then he saw that the bridge was flowing - and +the movement was so fast that the river was just static in comparison to it. He came +running to Lao Tsu and Lao Tsu said, "Okay! Now do not ask me. The thing has +happened to you." What had happened? No-mind had happened. + +In this technique, AT THE EDGE OF A DEEP WELL LOOK STEADILY INTO ITS +DEPTH UNTIL - THE WONDROUSNESS. When you feel wonder-filled, when the +mystery descends upon you, when mind is no more but simply mystery - a milieu of +mystery — then you will be capable of knowing yourself. + + + +Another technique: + +LOOK UPON SOME OBJECT, THEN SLOWLY WITHDRAW YOUR SIGHT FROM +IT, THEN SLOWLY WITHDRAW YOUR THOUGHT FROM IT. THEN. + +Look upon some object. Look at a flower, but remember what that LOOK means. Look! +Do not think. I need not repeat it. Always remember that look means: look, do not think. +If you think, it is not a look; then you have contaminated everything. It must be a pure +look, a simple look. + +LOOK UPON SOME OBJECT. Look at a flower,- a roseflower. THEN SLOWLY +WITHDRAW YOUR SIGHT FROM IT - very slowly. The flower is there — first look at +it. Drop thinking; go on looking. When you feel that now there is no thought, simply the +flower is there in your mind, nothing else, now slightly move your eyes away. By and by +the flower recedes, goes out of focus, but the image will remain with you. The object will +have gone out of focus; you will have turned your look away. The image, the outer +flower is no more there, but it is reflected - reflected in your mirror of consciousness. It +will be there! THEN SLOWLY WITHDRAW YOUR SIGHT FROM IT, THEN +SLOWLY WITHDRAW YOUR THOUGHT FROM IT. + +So first, withdraw from the outer object. Then only the inner image remains - the thought +of the roseflower. Now withdraw that thought also. This is very difficult, the second part, +but if the first part is done exactly as it is said, it will not be so difficult. + +First withdraw your mind from the object, your sight. Then close your eyes, and just as +you have removed your eyesight from the object, remove yourself from the image. +Withdraw yourself; become indifferent. Do not look at it inside, just feel that you have +gone away from it. Soon the image will also disappear. + +First the object disappears, then the image disappears. And when the image disappears, +Shiva says, THEN. Then you are left alone. In that aloneness one realizes oneself, one +comes to the center, one is thrown to the original source. + +This is a very good meditation — you can do it. Take any object, but let the object remain +the same every day so that the same image is created inside and you remove yourself +from the same image. Images in the temples were used for this technique.Now images are +there, but the technique is lost. You go to a temple — this is the technique to do. Look at +the statue of Mahavir or Buddha or Ram or Krishna or any other. Look at the statue, +concentrate on it; focus the whole mind so that the statue becomes an image inside. Then +close your eyes. Remove your eyes from the statue, then close them. And then remove +the image, wipe it out completely. + +Then you are there in your total aloneness, in your total purity, in your total innocence. +Realizing that is freedom, realizing that is truth. + + +THE END. + + + +Chapter 24: Doubt or faith, life or death; the bases of different paths + + +The first question: + +Question 1 + +I FEEL THAT NEITHER AM I THE FEELING TYPE ALTOGETHER, NOR AM I +THE INTELLECTUAL TYPE. I AM A MIXED TYPE. SHOULD I DO TWO +DIFFERENT KINDS OF TECHNIQUES ALTERNATIVELY? PLEASE GUIDE. + +This is a significant question. Many things will have to be understood. One: whenever +you feel that you are neither the intellectual type nor the emotional type, know well that +you belong to the intellectual type, because confusion is part of it. The emotional type is +never confused. One who belongs to the emotional type will not feel such confusion. +Emotion is always total and whole, intellect is always fragmented, divided, confused. + +That is the very nature of intellect. Why? Because intellect depends on doubt and +emotion depends on faith. Wherever doubt is, division will be, and doubt can never be +total. How can it be? The very nature of doubt is doubting. It can NEVER be total! You +cannot doubt a thing totally. If you doubt a thing totally, it becomes faith. + +Doubt is always confusion, and basically, when you doubt, you also doubt your doubt. +You cannot be certain about it. A doubting mind cannot be even certain about doubt. So +layers of confusion will be there, and each layer will be based on another layer of doubt +and confusion. + +The intellectual type always feels this way. The feeling will always be there that "I am +nowhere, I do not belong anywhere," or "Sometimes I am here and sometimes there, +sometimes this and sometimes that." + +But the emotional type is at ease with himself. Because trust is the base, emotion is not +divided, it is whole, individual. So if you have any doubt, if you cannot feel certain to +what type you belong, know well you belong to the intellectual type. Then practise +techniques which are meant for the intellectual type. If you do not feel any confusion, +then only do you belong to the emotional type, the feeling type. + +For example, a Ramakrishna: he is a feeling type. You cannot create doubt in him; that is +impossible, because a doubt can be created only when basically the doubt exists already. +No one can create doubt in you if it is not already hidden there. Others can only help it to +come out, they cannot create it. Neither can faith be created. That too others can help to +manifest, to come out. + +Your basic type cannot be changed, so it is very essential to know your basic type - +because if you are doing something which doesn’t suit you, fit with you, you are wasting +time and energy. And you will get more and more confused because of your wrong +efforts. Neither can doubt be created in you, nor faith. You already have the seed of +either this or that. If you have doubt, then it is better not to think of faith at all, because +that will be a deception and hypocrisy. If you have doubt, do not be afraid — Even doubt +can lead to the divine. You have to use it. + +I will repeat, even doubt can lead to the divine - because if your doubt can destroy the +divine, then it is stronger, more powerful than the divine. + +Even doubt can be used, it can be made a technique. But do not deceive. There are +persons who go on teaching that if you have doubts, you can never reach to the divine. So +what to do? Then you have to force it underneath, suppress it, hide it, create a false + + + +belief. But that will be only on the surface, it will never touch your soul. Deep down you +will remain in doubt, and just on the surface a facade will be created of belief. + +That is the difference between faith and belief. Belief is always false. Faith is a quality; +belief is a concept. Faith is the quality of your mind; belief is just acquired. So those who +have doubt and are afraid of it, they cling to beliefs; they say, "I believe," but they have +no faith. Deep down they know their doubt. They are always afraid of it. If you touch, +criticize their belief, they will immediately get angry. Why? Why the anger, this +irritation? They are not irritated by you, they are irritated by their own doubt which you +are helping to come up. If a man of faith is there you can criticize him and he is not going +to get angry, because you cannot destroy faith. + +A Ramakrishna is the type, or a Chaitanya or a Meera - they are feeling types. One of the +most beautiful minds of Bengal, Keshav Chandra, went to meet Ramakrishna. He went +not just to meet him, but to defeat him, because Ramakrishna was just an illiterate, not a +scholar at all. + +And Keshav Chandra was one of the greatest minds ever born on Indian soil, one of the +most keen, logical intellects. It was certain that Ramakrishna would be defeated. When +Keshav Chandra came, all the intellectuals of Calcutta gathered at Dakshineshwar just to +see Ramakrishna defeated. Keshav Chandra started arguing, but he must have felt very +awkward because Ramakrishna enjoyed his arguments very much - in fact, too much. +When he would propose some argument against God, Ramakrishna would start jumping, +dancing. + +He felt very awkward, so he said, "What are you doing? You have to answer my +arguments." Ramakrishna is reported to have said, "By my seeing you, my faith is +strengthened. Such an intellect is impossible without God." That is how a feeling type +looks at things. "And I predict," said Ramakrishna, "that sooner or later you will be a +greater devotee than me because you have a greater mind. With such a mind, how can +you fight the divine? With such a keen mind? Even a fool, an idiot like me, has reached. +How can you remain without reaching?" + +He was not angry, not arguing, but he defeated Keshav Chandra. Keshav Chandra +touched his feet and he said, "You are the first theist I have met with whom argument is +futile. Looking at your eyes, looking at you and the way you have behaved with me, this +is the first glimpse for me that the divine is possible. You are the proof without giving +any proof." + +Ramakrishna became the proof. + +The intellectual type has to proceed through doubt. Do not force any belief upon +yourself; that will be deceiving yourself. You cannot deceive anyone else, you can only +deceive yourself. Do not force; be authentic. If doubt is your nature, then proceed +through doubt. Doubt as much as possible, and do not choose any technique which is +based on faith — that is not for you. Choose some technique which is scientifically +experimental. No need to believe. + +There are two types of methods. One is experimental. You are not told to believe, you are +told to do it, and the consequence will be the belief, the faith. A scientist cannot believe. +He can take a hypothesis to work on, to experiment with, and if the experiment comes out +righ, if the experiment proves that the hypothesis is right, then he reaches to a conclusion. +Faith is achieved through experiment. So there are techniques in these one hundred and +twelve techniques which do not require any faith on your part. + + + +That is why Mahavir, Buddha, they are intellectual types, just as Ramakrishna and +Chaitanya are feeling types. Because of this Buddha says that there is no need to believe +in God; there is no God. He says, "Do what I say, do not believe in me. Experiment with +what I say, and if your experience proves it right then you can believe it." + +Buddha says, "Do not believe in me, do not believe what I say. + +Do not believe something because I have said it. Experiment with it, go through it, and +until you achieve your own conclusion remain in doubt. Your own experience will +become your faith." + +Mahavir said, "No need to believe in anyone - not even in the master. Just do the +technique." + +Science never says to believe. It says, do the experiment, go to the lab. This is for the +intellectual type. Do not try faith before you do the experiment. You cannot try it — you +will falsify everything. Be real unto yourself. Remain real and authentic. + +Sometimes it has happened that even atheists have reached the divine because of finding +their truth about themselves. Mahavir is an atheist; he doesn’t believe in God. Buddha is +an atheist; he doesn’t believe in any God. So a miracle happened with Buddha. It is said +about him that he was the most godless man and the most god-like. Both - godless and +god-like. He was absolutely intellectual, but he reached because he never deceived +himself, he went on doing experiments. For six years continuously he was doing this +experiment and that, and he did not believe. Unless something were proven true by +experience, he would not believe it. So he would do something, and if nothing happened +he would leave it. + +One day he reached. Just by doubting and doubting and doubting, experimenting, a point +came... a point came when nothing remained to be doubted. + +Without any object, the doubt fell. There was no object to doubt now. He had doubted +everything, and even doubt became futile. Doubt dropped, and in that dropping he +realized. Then he realized that the doubt was not the real thing: rather, the doubter was, +and you cannot doubt the doubter. The doubter is there to say, "No, this is not right." + +It may not be right, it may be right, but who is it who is saying that this is not right or this +is right? That source of saying is right, is true. You can say there is no God, but you +cannot say, "I am not," because the moment you say "I am not," you have accepted +yourself. Who is making this statement? You cannot deny yourself without at the same +time recognizing yourself. That is impossible. + +Even to deny you have to be there. You cannot say to someone, some guest who is +knocking on the door, that "I am not in the house. "How can you say this? This is +absurd, because your saying that "I am not in the house," proves that you are there. +Buddha doubted everything, but he could not doubt himself. When everything was +doubted and became useless, ultimately he was thrown to himself. And there, doubt was +impossible, so doubt fell. Suddenly he was awakened to his own reality, to his own +source of consciousness, the very ground of consciousness. So he was godless, but he +became god-like. Really, on this earth a more god-like person has never walked, but his +instinct was intellectual. + + +Both types of techniques are there. If you feel you are intellectual, confused, doubting, do +not try faith techniques, they are not for you. Every technique is not for everyone. If you + + + +have faith, there is no need to try any other method - no need ! If you have faith, then try +those methods which require faith as a presupposition. But be authentic; that is basic. + +That is a very essential thing to remember continuously. + +It is very easy to deceive - VERY easy to deceive, because we imitate. You may start +imitating Ramakrishna without knowing that you are not of that type. If you imitate, you +will be an imitation; nothing real will happen to you. You can imitate Buddha. This is +happening every day because we are bom into religions. Because of that, much nonsense +continues. You cannot be born into a religion: you have to choose. Religion has nothing +to do with blood, bones, birth - nothing! + +Someone is bom a Buddhist. He may be a feeling type, but he will follow Buddha. Then +his whole life will be wasted. Someone is born an intellectual type. He may be bom a +Mohammedan or he may be bom into a devotional cult. His life will be wasted and he +will become false. The whole world is irreligious because religion is foolishly associated +with birth. There is no relationship at all. You have to choose consciously, because first +you have to understand your type and then you have to choose. + +The world will be deeply religious the day we allow everyone to choose his religion, +method, technique, path. + +But religion has become organizational, politically organizational. That is why the +moment a child is bom we force religion upon him, we condition him into a religion. The +parents are afraid that he may move into another organization. Before he becomes +conscious he must be destroyed, crippled, forced. Before he becomes conscious and can +think about things, his mind must be conditioned so that he cannot think freely. You +cannot think freely because whatsoever you think has been preconditioned. + +I was reading Bertrand Russell. He says, "Intellectually, I conceive of Buddha as being +greater than Jesus. But deep down in my heart, that is impossible: Jesus is greater than +Buddha. At the most, if I force myself, then I will put them parallel, equal. Intellectually, + +I feel Buddha is a giant. Jesus is nothing before him." + +Why this feeling? Because Bertrand Russell is himself the intellectual type, so Buddha +has an appeal for him. Jesus has no appeal. But the mind has been conditioned into +Christianity. This is not truth because these comparisons are meaningless, they simply +show something about Bertrand Russell - neither about Buddha nor about Jesus, because +no comparison is possible. For someone who is of the feeling type, Jesus will look greater +than Buddha. + +But if he is a Buddhist, if he is born a Buddhist it will be difficult. His own mind will feel +uneasy if he thinks that someone is greater than Buddha. It is difficult, impossible in a +way, because whatsoever you think has been fed into you — it has already been fed. in. +Your mind is something like a computer. The infonnation has been fed in, evaluation has +been fed. in. You are already based on some non-sensical concepts, traditions. You cannot +throw them away easily; that is why religion is just a word. Very few people can become +religious, because very few people can rebel against their own conditioning. Only a +revolutionary mind can become religious - a mind which can see a thing, the facts of it, +and then decide what to do. + +But feel your type, try to feel your type. It is not difficult. The first thing: if you feel +confused, you are the intellectual type. If you feel certain, trusting, then proceed with the +different techniques which require trust as a basic thing. And secondly, remember, never +do both the techniques. That will create more confusion in you. Nothing is wrong; both + + + +are right; Ramakrishna is right, Buddha is right. Remember one thing: in this world, +many things can lead you to truth - many paths. There is no monopoly. Even +contradictory paths, absolutely contradictory paths, can lead you to the same point. + +There is no "one" path. On the contrary, if you go deep and realize, you will come to +know that there are as many paths as there are travelers, because each individual has to +proceed from the point where he is standing already. + +He cannot use a ready-made path. Basically, you create your path by your movement. +There is no ready-made path already there, there are no highways that are ready-made. +But every religion tries to force on you this idea that the path is ready and you have just +to travel over it. That is wrong. This inner search is more like the sky than the earth. + +A bird is flying: he will leave no footprints in the sky. The sky will remain a vacuum. + +The bird has flown — he has not left any footprints. No bird can follow in his footprints; +The sky is always empty. Another bird, any bird who has to fly, will create his own path. +Consciousness is like a sky, not like the earth. A Mahavir moves, a Buddha moves, a +Meera moves, a Mohammed moves... You can see their movement, you can see their +achievement, but the moment they move, the path disappears. You cannot follow, dead- +like, you cannot imitate. You have to find your own path. + +First think about your type and then choose methods. In these one hundred and twelve +methods, many are for the intellectual type, many are for the emotional type. But do not +think that because you are a mixed type you have to follow both. That will create more +confusion, and you will be divided so deeply that you may even go mad, schizophrenic; +you may become split. Do not do that. + +The second question: + +Question 2 + +TO KNOW DEATH IS CERT AIN, YOU SAID YESTERDAY. + +THIS SEEMS TO BE THE APPROACH OF BUDDHA, WHO WAS LIFE-NEGATIVE. +BUT TANTRA’S APPROACH IS LIFE AFFIRMATIVE, NOT NEGATIVE, SO HOW +CAN THIS DEATH ORIENTATION BE USED IN TANTRA? + +Buddha is not really life -negative. He appears so: he appears to be live-negative because +he focuses on death. To us he appears to be in love with death, but he is not. On the +contrary, he is in love with eternal life. To find that life which is deathless, he focuses on +death. Death is not his love, he has to focus on death just to find something which is +beyond death. And Buddha says that if there is nothing beyond death then life is futile — +but only then is life futile. He never says life is futile,. he says that if nothing is beyond +death, then life is futile. And your life is futile, he says, because your life is not beyond +death. Whatsoever you think is your life is just a part of death. You are fooled by that. +You think it is life and it is nothing but death on its way. + +A man is born — he is on his way to die. Whatsoever he becomes, whatsoever he +achieves, possesses, nothing will help: he is moving toward death. This so-called life is +moving toward death. How can we call it life? That is Buddha’s question. A life which +moves toward death, how call it life? Life which implies death inevitably is just hidden +death, not life; it is gradual death. By and by you are dying, and you go on thinking that +you are living. + + +Right now you feel you are living, but you are dying. Every moment you are losing life + + + +and gaining death. A tree is known by its fruits, Buddha says, so your tree of life cannot +be called life because death is the fruit. A tree is known by its fruit, and if on your tree of +life only fruits of death come, then you were deceived by the tree. And another thing: if a +tree gives a particular fruit, it shows that that particular fruit was the seed of the tree; +otherwise that particular fruit could not come out of the tree. So if life gives the fruit of +death, death must have been the seed. + +Let us understand this. You are born, and you think that birth is the beginning — it is not. +Before this birth, you died in another life. That death was the seed of this birth, and then +again, death will become the fruit. And that fruit will become the seed for another birth. +Birth leads to death, death precedes birth. So if you want to see life as it really is, it is +rounded on both the sides by death. Death is the beginning and death is again the end, +and life is just the illusion in between. You feel alive between two deaths; the passage +joining one death to another you call life. Buddha says this is not life. This life is +DUKKHA - misery. This life is death. That is why he appears to us who are deeply life- +hypnotized, obsessed about being alive in any way, as life -negating. + +To us, just to be alive seems to be the end. We are so much afraid of death that Buddha +appears in love with death, and that looks abnormal. He seems to be suicidal. This is +what many have criticized Buddha for. + +Albert Schweitzer has criticized Buddha because he feels that Buddha is obsessed with +death. He is not obsessed with death: we are obsessed with life. He is simply analyzing +things, finding out what are the facts. And the deeper you go, the more you will find he is +right. Your life is just false, fake, overtaken by death, just a clothing — inside there is +death. Buddha focuses on death because he says, "If I can find out what death is, only +then can I find out what life is. And if I can know what both death and life are, then there +is a possibility that I may transcend both and know something which is beyond birth and +death, beyond both." He is not negative, not life-denying, but he appears so. + +Tantra appears life-affirmative, but that again is our interpretation. Neither is Buddha +life-denying, nor is tantra life-affirmative; the source is the same. Buddha focuses on +death, tantra focuses on life. And both are one, so wherever you want to start, start. But +go so deeply that you come to know the other also. + +Buddha focuses on the end - death. Tantra focuses on the beginning-life. That is why +Buddha seems to be too much in love with death and tantra seems to be too much in love +with sex, love, body, life. + +In the end there is death and in the beginning there is sex. Because tantra focuses itself on +the beginning, sex becomes very important. So how to go deep and know what sex is, +how to reveal the mystery of love, how to penetrate into the beginning, into the seed, so +that you can go beyond — that is tantra's approach. + +Buddha focuses on death, and he says to meditate deeply on death, move into it and know +the whole reality of it. Both are two ends of the same thing. Sex is death, and death is +very sexual. It will be difficult to understand. + +There are many insects which die with their first intercourse. The first sex act, and death +occurs. There is a species of spider in Africa in which the male dies in copulation. He +cannot come down from the copulation; he is just on the female, and he dies there. The +first copulation becomes death, and it is very horrible. At the moment of ejaculation he +dies. Actually, he is not even really dead: he is still in the pangs of death. The moment +the spider, the male spider, ejaculates, death starts and the female starts eating him. He + + + +never dismounts. The female starts eating him, and by the time the sexual act is finished, +he is half eaten. + +Sex and death are so interconnected. Because of this, man became afraid of sex. Those +who want to live more, who are fascinated with long life, they will be always afraid of +sex, and those who think that they can become immortal, BRAHMACHARYA celibacy +will be their cult. + +No one has yet been immortal and no one can be because you are born out of sex. If you +were born out of BRAHMACHARYA, then it could be possible. If your father and +mother were celibates, then, then only could you be immortal. + +Sex has already entered with your birth. Whether you go into sex or not makes no +difference: you cannot escape death. Your very being starts with sex, and sex is the +beginning of death. Because of this Christians say Jesus was bom from a virgin mother. +Just to say that he is no mortal, no ordinary mortal, they say he was born to a virgin +mother. "He is no ordinary mortal"... just to say this, just to say that death has no power +over him, they had to create this myth. + +This is a part of a long myth. If he was bom out of sex, then death would have its power +over him. Then he could not escape death, as with sex, death enters. So they say that he +was born without any sex act; he was not a by-productof sex. They say that because he +was the son of a virgin mother, he could revive again - resurrect. They crucified him, but +they could not kill him. He remained alive because he was not a by-product of sex. They +could not kill him. If really Jesus was born out of a virgin mother, it is impossible to kill +him. It is impossible to kill him! Death is impossible! When the beginning is not, how +can the end be? If he was not bom out of a virgin mother, then death will be the certain, +inevitable end. + + +So the whole myth has to be maintained. If you say that he was not bom out of a virgin +mother, then the second part of the myth, resurrection, becomes false. If you say he +resurrected, that he denied death, escaped death, that death could not kill him, that he +could not be cmcified really, that those who were crucifying him were deceived, that he +was alive and he remained alive, then you have to maintain the first part of the myth. + +I am not saying anything for or against, I am simply saying that the WHOLE myth has to +be maintained, one part only cannot be maintained. If sex is there before birth, then death +will be there. Because of this deep association, many times many societies have become +afraid of sex. That fear is of death. Even if you accept sex, a certain fear remains there. +Even if you move into sex, a certain fear remains there. No one allows himself a total let- +go in it. The fear is there, you are on guard. You cannot go into it totally; you cannot let +yourself go completely because that let-go is just like death. + +Neither is tantra for your idea of life, nor is Buddha against the real life. Tantra starts +from one part — the beginning; Buddha starts with the end. And tantra is more scientific +than Buddha, because it is always good to begin at the beginning. You are already born; +death is far away. Birth has occurred — you can work on it more deeply — death has to +occur. + +It is still in the imagination; it is not a reality to you. And when you see someone die, you +never see death. You see someone dying, never the death — the process which happens to +him inside. You cannot see it; it is invisible, it is individual. And the individual himself + + + +cannot say anything because the moment he goes through the process he is no more. He +cannot come back, he cannot step back and tell what has happened. + +So whatsoever is known about death is just inference. No one knows anything about +death actually. Unless you can remember your past lives, you cannot actually know +anything about death. You have died many times; that is why Buddha had to revive many +techniques about remembering past lives. Because your death of this life is in the future, +how can you concentrate on it? How can you meditate on it? It has not happened yet. It is +very vague, dark, unknown. What can you do? You can only think about it, but that +thinking will also be borrowed. You will be repeating what others have said. Someone +has said something about death, and you will be repeating it. How can you meditate on +death? You can see others dying, but that is not a real entry into it. You are just an +outsider. + +It is just as if someone is eating a sweet... You look at him, but how can you feel what is +happening to him, what taste, what sweetness, what fragrance is happening to him? What +is going on in him you cannot know. + +You can just look at his mouth, his behavior, or you can see the expression on his face — +but this is all inference, not actual experience. + +You cannot know what is happening to him unless he says something, but whatsoever he +says will be words to you, and again not an experience. Buddha talked about his past +deaths, but no one believed him. If I tell you something about my past deaths, deep down +you will not believe it. How can you believe it? You do not have any access to the reality +of it. You are just closed at this birth, and the death of this life has not come yet. It +always happens to others; it has not happened to you yet. + +It is difficult to meditate on death. As a base, you will have to move into past lives, you +will have to go digging into past memories. Buddha, Mahavir, they both used the +technique of JAATI SMARAN — the technique of going into past lives. Only then can +you meditate on death. + +Tantra is more scientific. It starts with life, with birth, with sex, which is a fact to you. +Death is still a fiction. But remember, the end of both is the same. They both are in search +of eternal life — life which is deathless. Either transcend the beginning or transcend the +end, either jump from one pole or from another. And remember, you can jump out of it +only from a pole, you cannot jump from the middle. + +If I want to jump out of this room, either I have to move to this side to the extreme, or to +that side to the extreme. + +I cannot jump out from the middle of the room, because jumping is possible only from +the extreme pole. And there are two extreme poles in life - birth and death. Tantra starts +from birth. It is more scientific, more real. You are already in it, so you can meditate +upon it. Sex is a fact, so you can meditate upon it: you can move deep within it. + +Death is not a fact. A very rare mind is needed to conceive of death; a very keen intellect +is needed to penetrate into the future. Rarely, it happens that a buddha will conceive of +death so deeply that the future becomes the present. But it is always for rare individuals. +Tantra can be used by anyone who has any interest, who has any desire to search in order +to know what real life is. But tantra also uses death just to help you move inwards - not +for you to meditate on it, not for you to jump out of it, but to help you move inwards. +Buddha also talked about birth just to make it a part of the meditation on death. The other +part can be used as a help, but is not the center. Tantra says, if you can think about death, + + + +your life will take a different meaning, shape and significance. Your mind will start +thinking in new dimensions which without death would be difficult or even impossible. +The moment you begin to feel that this life is going to end in death, death becomes a +certainty and you cannot cling to this life: mind starts moving beyond. + +That is what I was saying yesterday. + +If you think about just this life, your mind will go outwards: it will go out and out and out +to the objects. If you begin to look and see that death is hidden everywhere, then you +cannot cling to objects. Your mind will start moving inwards. + +Just the other day a young girl came to me. She is an Indian girl who fell in love with an +American boy. But after she fell in love and they were just thinking and planning to get +married, the boy fell ill and it was discovered, diagnosed, that he had a certain type of +cancer that is incurable. Death was certain. He could be alive two or three or four years at +the most. The boy tried to persuade the girl not to marry him now. He said, "Death is so +certain, why waste your life with me?" + +But the more he insisted — this is how the mind functions — the more the girl became +adamant about wanting to marry him. This is how mind works — in paradoxes. If I would +have been in the place of that boy, I would have insisted on marrying;then the girl would +have escaped. Then there was no possibility of marriage. Then I would not have seen that +girl again. But the boy insisted - out of his love, but out of a foolish mind, without +knowing how mind functions — that she should not marry him. Anyone would have done +the same. And because he was insisting, the girl felt it to be a matter of conscience: she +insisted to marry. + + +Then they got married. Now, after marriage, the girl is surrounded constantly by death. +She is sad; she cannot love the boy. It is easy to die for anyone, .it is very difficult to live. +It is very easy to die... to be a martyr is such an easy thing. It is such an easy thing to be a +martyr because it is a momentary thing: you can do it in a single moment. + +If you love me and I say, "Jump out of this building," you can jump because you feel you +love me. But if I say, "Okay, now live with me for thirty years," it is very difficult - +VERY difficult! + +You can become a martyr in a single moment. To die for someone, for something, is the +easiest thing in the world; to live for something is the most arduous and difficult thing. +She became a martyr, but now she has to live enclosed in death's presence. She cannot +love. She cannot see the face of her husband, because the moment she sees it the cancer is +there, the death is there just by the corner. Any moment it can happen, so she is in +constant agony. + +What has happened? Death has become a certainty. Now life has no interest for her, +everything has dropped and has become death. She came from America just to meet me . +She wants to meditate because life seems futile. Life has become equivalent to cancer, so +now she has come here to ask me, "Teach me meditation. How can I move beyond life?" +Unless life becomes futile you never think about moving beyond it. + + +I told her that apparently her marriage looks very unfortunate, but it may prove very +fortunate. Everyone's husband is going to die, but it is not certain. Everybody's wife is +going to die, but it is not certain. Death is certain, only the date is not certain. And who + + + +knows, even the date may be certain — you do not know. That is why ignorance is very +blissful. She could have loved that boy if still they were ignorant; apparently nothing +would be wrong. But now love has become impossible, life has become impossible. + +Death is always there, constantly present between the two of Them. + +So I asked her, "Why are you not loving him more because he is going to die? Love him +more." + +She said, "How can I love? We are always three; the privacy is lost. I am there and my +husband is there, and between we two, Death. There is no privacy left." + +Death is too much; it is impossible to live with. It can become a turning. If you can +become aware of death, says tantra, use it as a turning inwards. No need to go into details +about death, no need to go on contemplating about it. Do not make it an obsession. Just +the awareness that death is there will help you to move inwards, to be meditative. + +The third question : + +Question 3 + +HOW CAN THE MIND BE TRANSCENDED AND TRANSFORMED ONLY BY +BRINGING THE BODY TO A DEATH-LIKE STATE? + +The mind is constantly active. + +While you are active meditation is impossible, because meditation means a deep +inactivity. You can know yourself only when everything has become still, silent and +quiet. Only then, in that silence, do you happen to encounter yourself. Otherwise, in +activity you are so much occupied with something or other, you cannot feel your own +presence. You go on forgetting yourself. Continuously, with this or that object, you go on +forgetting yourself. + +Activity means being related with something outside. You are active because you are +related with something outside, doing something outside. Inactivity means you have +returned home; you are not doing anything. In Greek language, leisure is called schole. +The English word school comes from this Greek word; School means leisure. You can +learn something only when you are at leisure; learning happens in leisure. If you are +active, doing this and that, you cannot leam. + +Schools were for the leisure class - those who could afford leisure. Their children were +sent to schools, to places of leisure. They were not to do anything but leam; they were +allowed total inactivity as far as the world was concerned. They were freed from all +worldly activity, and then they could leam. + +The phenomenon is similar if you want to learn about your own presence: you will have +to be completely inactive - COMPLETELY inactive, just being, not doing anything. + +All the ripples must cease, all activity must evaporate. You are, simply. YOU ARE! In +that moment, for the first time you become aware of your own presence. Why? Because +the presence is so subtle. Occupied with a gross object, engaged with gross activity, you +cannot become aware of such a subtle presence. It is a very silent music, your presence. +And you are so much filled with noise ,and every type of noise is occupying you, that you +cannot hear that still, small voice within. + +Cease being engaged in outward noises and activities. Then that still, small voice, for the +first time is heard; that soundless sound, that soundless music is felt. You enter the subtle +and leave the gross. Activity is gross; inactivity is subtle. And your presence is the most +subtle thing in the world. To feel that, you will have to cease; you will have to be absent +from everywhere so that your total presence comes in and you can encounter yourself. + + + +That is why in many techniques it is suggested to make your body as if it is dead. It +means simply being inactive like a dead man. + +While you are meditating, let your body enter death. It will be imagination, but even that +will help. Do not ask how imagination can help. Imagination has its own function. For +example, now scientific experiments are done... You sit down, there is a doctor, and he is +observing your pulse rate. Inside, you just start being angry; you imagine that you are +fighting, angry — your pulse rate will go higher. + + +Inside, just imagine you are dying, that you are just going to die. Become silent and feel +death descending. Your pulse rate will come down. The pulse rate is a physical thing, and +you were just imagining. Imagination is not unreal; it is also real. If you can really +imagine, even real death can occur. If you can really imagine, you can affect physical +things. + +You might have observed some display of hypnosis. Or if not, you can do this easily at +home; it is not difficult, it is very easy. Use your child as the medium. If the child is a +girl, it is better than using a boy, because a boy is more doubting than a girl, and a boy is +always in a fighting mood instead of a cooperative mood. A boy means that - a fighting +mood. + +Cooperation is needed. Just tell the child to relax, and go on suggesting, "You are going +into a deep trance, going into a deep trance, going into a deep trance, falling asleep. Your +eyelids are becoming heavy, heavy, heavier..." And use a monotonous voice: "Heavier, +heavier, heavier..." Let your voice be monotonous, as if you are also becoming sleepy. +Within five minutes the child will be fast asleep. This is not ordinary sleep, this is a +hypnotic trance. It is basically, qualitatively different from sleep, because now the child +can hear only your voice. There is nothing else that he or she can hear. If someone else +talks, the child is deaf. + +If you talk — the person who has hypnotized him — he can still hear, he will follow your +orders. + +Try to do some experiments. Say to the child, "This is a burning hot coal that I am putting +in your hand. You will be burned." Put any ordinary thing in the child's hand - a piece of +stone that is cold, with nothing hot about it. The child will throw it immediately because +the mind has the suggestion that it is a burning coal, hot, and that his or her hand is going +to be burned. He will throw it, he will scream as if he has touched something hot. + +But a miracle happens. You will come to know that his hand is really burned. What is +happening? There was no possibility of being burned by a cold stone, but the child is +burned exactly as if there was a burning coal put in his hand. It was just imagination. + +That is why those who have penetrated the human mind, they say that imagination is as +real a fact as anything. Imagination is not JUST imagination, because it results in actual +fact. + +Do this experiment... Fall down on the ground, lie still and feel you are going to die. The +body is becoming dead. By and by you will feel a heaviness coming over the body. The +whole body will become a dead weight, a lead weight. Tell yourself that "Even if I want +to remove my hand from the position where it is, I cannot move it. "Then try to remove it, +and you will not be able to do so. + + +Now the imagination is working. + + + +In this state where you feel the body has become a dead weight, you can cut yourself off +from the world of activity easily. That is why this is suggested. You can now become +inactive because you are dead. Now you can feel that everything has died and the bridge +from you to the world is broken. The body is the bridge. If the body is dead, you cannot +do anything. Can you do anything without the body? You cannot do anything without the +body. + +Any activity is through the body. Mind can think about it but cannot do it. You have +become impotent; you cannot do anything. You are inside, the world is outside, the +vehicle is dead and the bridge is broken. In this state of the body being dead and the +bridge being broken, your energy will start moving inwards, because there is no way to +move out. The outer way is closed and blocked, so now you move inwards. See yourself +standing at the heart center; look within at the details of the body. You will feel very +strange when for the first time you can look from within your own body. + +Tantra, yoga, ayurveda, all the old physiologies, all the old physiological doctrines, their +work was revealed and made known through such inner meditative techniques. Modem +physiology is known through dissection, but ancient physiology was known through +meditation, not dissection. And now there is a school, a school of very avant-garde +medical thinkers who say that when you dissect a body and come to know something, +you come to know something which is dead - and whatsoever is inferred from a dead part +is irrelevant to a live body. + + +They may be right. If you take my blood out and then examine it, you are examining dead +blood. It is not the same blood which was in me. Outwardly it is the same, but in me it +was a live process, a live current, alive, part of a mechanism, of an organic whole. Now it +is dead. It is as if you pull my eyes out and then examine them. When they were with me +I was behind them and in them. Now they are dead stones, and whatsoever you come to +know about those eyes is not about my eyes, because the basic, essential part is missing: I +am not there. + +Those eyes were part of a big whole. Their whole quality consisted in being part of a big +whole. Now they are independent, not part of anything. The pattern is lost, the live +contact is lost. All the traditions of yoga and tantra say that unless you can come to know +the living body, your knowledge is false. But how to come to know the living body? + +There is only one way: you enter into yourself, and move within to see the details of the +body. A different world was revealed through these techniques, an alive world. + +So the first thing: be centered at the heart, and look around at your body, move. Two +things will happen. One: you will not feel now that you are the body — you cannot feel it. +You are the observer, one who is aware, alert, looking at, not being looked at. For the +first time the body will become just a clothing; you will be different from it. + +And the second thing: immediately you will feel, "I cannot die." + +This will seem strange — using a method, an imaginary method of death, and then coming +to the deathless point. You will come to know suddenly, "I cannot die." You have seen +others who have died. What happened to them? Their bodies became dead; that is why +you inferred that they were dead. Now you can see that the whole body is lying dead, and +you are alive. + +So bodily death is not your death. The body dies, and you move on. And if you persist in +this technique, the time is not very far away when you can come out of your body and + + + +look at your body from without, at your body lying dead just before you. It is not very +difficult. Once you experience this, you will never be the same person again. You will be +reborn; you will become DWIJ - twice born. Now a new life starts. + +I was telling you yesterday about one astrologer who had promised to work on my life's +birth chart. He died before he had done it, so his son had to prepare the chart, but he was +also puzzled. He said, "It is almost certain that this child is going to die at the age of +twenty-one. Every seven years he will have to face death." So my parents, my family, +were always worried about my death. Whenever I would come to the end of a seven-year +cycle, they would become afraid. And he was right. At the age of seven I survived, but I +had a deep experience of death - not of my own, but of the death of my maternal +grandfather. + +And I was so much attached to him that his death appeared to be my own death. + +In my own childish way I imitated his death. I would not eat for three days continuously, +would not drink water, because I felt that if I did so it would be a betrayal. I loved him so +much, he loved me so much, that when he was alive I was never allowed to go to my +parents. I was with my maternal grandfather. He said, "When I die, only then can you +go." He lived in a very small village, so I couldn’t go to any school because there was no +school. He would never leave me, but then the time came when he died. He was part and +parcel of me. I had grown with his presence, his love. + +When he died I felt that it would be a betrayal to eat. Now I didn’t want to live. It was +childish, but through it something very deep happened. For three days I remained lying +down: I would not come out of the bed. I said, "Now that he is dead, I do not want to +live." I survived, but those three days became a death experience. I died in a way, and I +came to realize — now I can tell about it, though at that time it was just a vague +experience — I came to feel that death is impossible. This was a feeling. + +Then at the age of fourteen, my family again became disturbed that I would die. I +survived, but then I again tried it consciously. I said to them, "If death is going to occur +as the astrologer has said, then it is better to be prepared. + +And why give a chance to death? Why should I not go and meet it half way? If I am +going to die, then it is better to die consciously." + +So I took leave from my school for seven days. I went to my principal and I told him, "I +am going to die." He said, "What nonsense you are talking! Are you committing suicide? +What do you mean you are going to die?" + +I told him about the astrologer's prediction that the possibility of death would confront +me every seven years. I told him, "I am going into retreat for seven days to wait for +death. If death comes, it is good to meet it consciously so that it becomes an experience." +I went to a temple just outside of my village. I arranged with the priest that he should not +disturb me. It was a very lonely, unvisited temple - old, in ruins. No one ever came to it. +So I told him, "I will remain in the temple. You just give me once a day something to eat +and something to drink, and the whole day I will be lying there waiting for death." + +For seven days I waited. Those seven days became a beautiful experience. Death never +came, but on my part I tried in every way to be dead. Strange, weird feelings happened. +Many things happened, but the basic note was this - that if you are feeling you are going +to die, you become calm and silent. Nothing creates any worry then because all worries +are concerned with life. Fife is the basis of all worries. + + + +When you are going to die anyway one day, why worry? + +I was lying there. On the third or fourth day a snake entered the temple. It was in view, I +was seeing the snake, but there was no fear. Suddenly I felt very strange. The snake was +coming nearer and nearer, and I felt very strange. There was no fear, so I thought, "When +death is coming, it may be coming through this snake, so why be afraid? Wait!" + +The snake crossed over me and went away. Fear had disappeared. If you accept death, +there is no fear. If you cling to life, then every fear is there. + +Many times flies came around me. They would fly around, they would creep over me, on +my face. Sometimes I felt irritated and would have liked to throw them off, but then I +thought, "What is the use? Sooner or later I am going to die, and then no one will be here +to protect the body. So let them have their way." + +The moment I decided to let them have their way, the irritation disappeared. They were +still on the body, but it was as if I was not concerned. They were as if moving, as if +creeping on someone else's body. There was a distance immediately. If you accept death, +a distance is created. Life moves far away with all its worries, irritations, everything. I +died in a way, but I came to know that something deathless is there. Once you accept +death totally, you become aware of it. + +Then again at the age of twenty-one, my family was waiting. + +So I told them, "Why do you go on waiting? Do not wait. Now I am not going to die." +Physically, someday I will die, of course. However, this prediction of the astrologer +helped me very much because he made me aware very early on about death. +Continuously, I could meditate and could accept that it was coming. + +Death can be used for deep meditation because then you become inactive. Energy is +released from the world; it can move inwards. That is why a death-like posture is +suggested. Use life, use death, for discovering that which is beyond both. + + +THE END. + + + +Chapter 25: From words to pure sounds to being + + +13. DEVI, IMAGINE THE SANSKRIT LETTERS IN THESE HONEY-FILLED FOCI +OF AWARENESS, FIRST AS LETTERS, THEN MORE SUBTLY AS SOUNDS, +THEN AS MOST SUBTLE FEELING. THEN, LEAVING THEM ASIDE, BE FREE. + +14. BATHE IN THE CENTER OF SOUND, AS IN THE CONTINUOUS SOUND OF A +WATERFALL. OR, BY PUTTING THE FINGERS IN THE EARS, HEAR THE +SOUND OF SOUNDS. + +Jean Paul Sartre wrote an autobiography. He has called it WORDS. The name is very +meaningful. It is the autobiography of every man — words and words and words. You are +fdled with words, and this process of words continues the whole day, even in the mind. +When you are sleeping, you are still fdled with words, thoughts. + +The mind is just an accumulation of words, and everyone is too much obsessed with the +mind. That is why self-knowledge becomes more and more impossible. The self is +beyond the words, or behind the words, or below the words, or above the words, but +never in the words. You exist not in the mind, but just below the mind, behind the mind, +above the mind — never in the mind. You are focused in the mind, but you are not there. +Standing out, you are focused in the mind. Because of this constant focusing, you have +become identified with the mind. You think you are the mind, this is the only problem, +the basic problem, and unless you are aware that you are not the mind, nothing +meaningful can happen to you. + +You will live in misery. + +This identification is the misery. It is as if one is identified with a shadow. Then the +whole life becomes false. Your whole life is false, and the basic error is that you are +identified with the mind. You think you are the mind: this is the ignorance. You can +develop your mind, but in that way ignorance will not be dissolved. You can become +very intelligent, you can become very talented, you may even become a genius. But if the +identification with the mind is there, you remain basically mediocre because you remain +identified with a false shadow. How does it happen? Unless you understand the +mechanism of how it happens you cannot go beyond it, and all the techniques of +meditation are nothing but processes to go beyond, to go beyond the mind. + +Meditation techniques are not against the world, they are against the mind — and not +really against the mind, but against identification. How are you identified with the mind? +What is the mechanism that is working? Mind is a need — a great need, particularly for +humanity. And that is the basic difference between man and the animals. Man thinks, and +he has used thinking as a weapon for his struggle to survive. He could survive because he +could think; otherwise he is more helpless than any animal, more weak than any animal. +Physically, it was impossible for him to survive. He could survive because he could +think. + +Because of thinking, he has become the master of the earth. + +If thinking has been so deeply helpful, then it becomes easy to understand why man has +become identified with the mind. You are not so much identified with the body. Of +course, religions go on saying, "Do not be identified with the body," but no one is really +identified with the body — no one! You are identified with the mind, not with the body, + + + +and this identification with the body is not so fatal as the identification with the mind — +because the body is more real. The body exists, it is related to existence very deeply. +Mind is just a shadow. + +Identification with the mind is more subtle than identification with the body, but we are +identified with the mind because mind has been such a great help to survive — not only +against animals, against nature, but against other human beings also. If you have a keen, +intelligent mind, you will win against other human beings as well. You will succeed, you +will become more rich, because you will be more calculating and more cunning. Against +other human beings also, mind is the weapon. That is why we are so much identified — +remember this. + +Against death, against disease, against nature, against animals, against other human +beings, mind has been your protection, your security. And mind has done much, so +obviously we think of ourselves as mind. If someone says that your body is ill you do not +feel offended, but if someone says that your mind seems ill you do feel offended. + +If your body is ill, you do not feel offended. Why? You are not identified with the body. +But if your mind is ill and someone says you are psychologically ill, mentally ill, insane, +you feel offended. Now this is something about you, not about your body. + +You behave with the body as if it is a vehicle, something you possess, but not so with the +mind. With the mind, you are the mind; with the body, you are the master. The body is a +slave — you possess it. + +This mind has created a division in your being also, and that is the second basic cause of +why we are identified with it. You think not only about external things, you think about +internal things also. For example, the body has many instincts. You think about your +instincts also. Not only do you think, you fight against your instincts, so there is a +constant internal fight. There is sex: the mind fights it, or tries to mold it in its own way. +ft suppresses it, perverts it, tries to control it. + +The mind is fighting inside also. That fight creates a division between you and your +body. And really, you start thinking that the body is something inimical, not a friend, +because the body goes on doing things which the mind is against. The body is not going +to listen to the mind, so the mind feels offended, defeated, ft attacks the body, and then a +division is created. And you are always identified with the mind, never with the body. + + +The mind is your ego. That is your "1". If the body feels sexuality, you can divide. You +can say, "This is the body, not me. 1 am against it. 1 have taken a vow of celibacy, 1 am +against it. This is the body; this is not me." Then who are you? The mind which has taken +a vow? This mind is your ego, and you go against the body because the body is very +much ego-destroying. Whatsoever you decide, it never listens. + +All the ascetic nonsense was born because of this: the body will not listen. The body is +nature, the body is a part of the cosmic whole, the body has its own laws. Those laws are +unconscious; it functions according to them. The mind tries to create its own laws over +and above the body. Then a conflict is created. Then the mind starts fighting the body. +Then the mind will starve the body; it will try in every way to kill it. + +That is what has happened in the past: so-called religious people have been really mad +against their bodies. And whatsoever they were doing was less for God and more against +the body. Really, to be in search of God became synonymous with being against the +body. Religious persons took the attitude, "Kill the body, destroy the body. The body is + + + +the enemy." And really, this is not a religious attitude, but one of the most irreligious +attitudes, because it is the most egoistical. This is the ego, the ego feels offended. + +You decide not to be angry again, and then anger comes: your ego feels defeated. + +Your decision is thrown overboard, and the anger comes. And when the anger comes you +feel this is coming from the body. You decide against sex and sex comes: you feel +offended, so you try to punish the body. Asceticism is nothing but punishment — +punishing your own body in order to force it to behave according to the ego. + +This mind, this process of thinking, this ego, is just a fragment of your whole total being, +and this fragment is trying to be the sovereign. This is not possible, the fragment cannot +be the sovereign. It is going to fail; that is why there is so much frustration in life. You +can never succeed — you are trying the impossible. The fragment cannot be the +sovereign. The whole is bigger and the whole is more powerful. + +It is just as if a branch of a tree tries to control the whole tree, even the roots. How can a +branch control the whole tree, and how can it force the roots to follow it? That is +impossible. Whatsoever it thinks, it is mad; the branch has gone mad. It may go on +thinking and dreaming, conceiving of some future where the tree will be following it, but +it is not possible; it will have to follow the tree. It is alive only because of the tree and the +roots. And the roots were there before it was. The roots are the source of it also. + +Your mind is just a fragment of your body; it cannot control it. The very effort to control +the body will create frustration and failure. + +And the whole humanity has been a failure because of this. Everyone is suffering, in +conflict, in anguish, in anxiety, trembling, because the impossible is being tried. But the +ego always likes to try the impossible. The possible has no challenge for it; the +impossible is a challenge. And if the impossible can be done, then the ego will feel very +good — because this cannot be done. You can try to do it, but you will waste your life +trying that which cannot be done. + +Because of this inner effort to become the master, you are identified with the mind. Who +would like to be identified with a slave? Who would like to be identified with the +unconscious? It is useless. The unconscious is negated because it cannot be grasped. And +with the unconscious there is no ego; you cannot feel "I". + +Try to understand it in this way: when sex overpowers you, really you cannot say "I". It +is as if something greater than you has taken possession — as if you are in a strong +current. Y ou are no more; something else is driving you. That is why these words are +meaningful... that is why those who are against sex will say, "Sex possessed me." + +Anger possesses you, hunger possesses you. They are something greater than you, and +you are just taken by the current. It is fearful. It is very fearful because then you are no +more. It is a sort of death. That is why you are so much against sex — it is a sort of death. + +Those who are against sex will always be afraid of death, and those who are not against +sex and can flow in it easily, spontaneously, will never be afraid of death. See the +association: those who are against sex will always be afraid of death, and those who are +afraid of death will be always against sex. + +Those who are afraid of death will always create theories of immortality; they will +always think about life beyond death. Those who think about immortality will always be +against sex — these are alternatives. Sex gives you a fear. What is the fear? You are no +more in it, something greater than you possesses you. You are thrown overboard; you are + + + +no more in it. + +So even those who are not against sex, they too never move really deep into sex. They +never move; they are always holding back, trying to remain there, not allowing +themselves, not ready for a let-go. That is why orgasm, such a natural thing, has become +so impossible for man and woman. A deep orgasm means you have been in something +which was greater than you. You have been in something where you were not, the ego +was not. + +The ego is struggling to control everything, and mind helps you. In the effort you become +identified with the mind, and this identification is the misery, it is a false shadow. Mind is +a very utilitarian instrument. You have to use it, but do not become identified with it. It is +a good instrument — necessary. + +Use it! But do not feel that YOU are the mind, because once you start feeling you are the +mind, you cannot use it. The mind starts using you. Then you are simply drifting with the +mind. + +All the meditation techniques are an effort to give you a glimpse of that which is not +mind. So how to go beyond it? How to leave it and look at it even for a single moment? + +The first technique: + +DEVI, IMAGINE THE SANSKRIT LETTERS IN THESE HONEY-FILLED FOCI OF +AWARENESS, FIRST AS LETTERS, THEN MORE SUBTLY AS SOUNDS, THEN +AS MOST SUBTLE FEELING. THEN, LEAVING THEM ASIDE, BE FREE. + +Words are sounds. Thoughts are words in sequence, in logical sequence, in a particular +pattern. Sound is basic. With sound words are created, and then with words thoughts are +created, and then with thoughts religion and philosophy, everything. Deep down is the +sound. + +This technique uses a reverse process. Shiva says: DEVI, IMAGINE THE SANSKRIT +LETTERS IN THESE HONEY-FILLED FOCI OF AWARENESS, FIRST AS +LETTERS, THEN MORE SUBTLY AS SOUNDS, THEN AS MOST SUBTLE +FEELING. THEN, LEAVING THEM ASIDE, BE FREE. + +We live in philosophy. One is a Hindu, one is a Mohammedan, one is a Christian, or +something else. We live in philosophies, systems of thought, and they have become so +important that we can die for them. Man can die for words, for mere words. Someone +calls his conception of the absolute a lie, or someone calls Ram or someone calls Christ +or something else a lie — then man can fight, for a mere word he can kill the other. + +The word has become so important. This is nonsense, but this is history and this is how +we are still behaving. + +A single word can create such a disturbance in you that you are ready to kill or to die for +it. We live in philosophies, systems of thought. What are philosophies? Thoughts +arranged logically, systematically, in a pattern. And what are thoughts? Words arranged +in a system, meaningfully. And what are words? Sounds, upon which it is agreed that +they mean either this or that. So sounds are basic; they are the basic structure of the mind. +Philosophies are the peak, but the bricks by which the whole structure is raised are +sounds. + +What is wrong? A sound is just a sound, and the meaning is given by us, agreed upon by +us; otherwise it has no meaning. The meaning is invested by us, projected by us; +otherwise "Ram" is just a sound — it is meaningless. We give it a meaning, and then we + + + +create a system of thought around it. Then this word becomes very significant, then we +make a philosophy around it. Then you can do something, anything, for it. You can die or +you can live for it. If someone insults this sound "Ram," you can become infuriated. And +what is this? Just an agreement, a legal agreement that "This word means this." No word +means anything in itself, it is simply a sound. + +This sutra says to go in the reverse order — go backwards. Come to the sounds, then, +more basic than sounds, a feeling is somewhere hidden. + +This has to be understood. Man uses words. Words mean sounds with meanings that are +agreed upon. But animals, birds use sounds without any linguistic meaning. They do not +have any language, but they use sounds with feeling. A bird is singing: it has a "feeling" +meaning in it, it is indicating something. It may be a call for the partner, for the beloved, +or it may be a call for the mother, or the child may be feeling hungry and just showing his +distress. It is indicating a feeling. + +Above sounds there are words, thoughts, philosophies; below sounds are feelings. And +unless you can get below feelings, you cannot get below mind. The whole world is filled +with sounds, only the human world is filled with words. And even a child who cannot use +language uses sounds. Really, the whole language developed because of particular +sounds that every child is using all over the world. + +For example, in any language the word 'mother’ is somehow related with Tna’. It may be +'mater', it may be 'Mutter', it may be Tnata', it may be Tna’, — anything — but somewhere +it is related with the sound "ma" in all the languages, more or less. The child can utter +"ma" most easily. The first sound which the child can utter is "ma." Then the whole +structure is based on this "ma." A child utters "ma" because it is the first sound which is +easy for the child to utter. This is the case anywhere, in any part of the world, in any +time. + +Just because of the structure of the throat and the body, "ma" is the easiest sound to utter. +And the mother is the nearest and the first person who is meaningful. So the first sound +becomes associated with the first person who is meaningful, and from this mother, mater, +mata, ma, all the other words are derived. But when the child for the first time utters +"ma," he has no linguistic meaning for it, but a feeling is there. And because of that +feeling the word becomes associated with the mother. That feeling is more basic than the +sound. + +So this sutra says first to imagine the Sanskrit letters. Any language will do. Because +Shiva was talking to Parvati, that is why he said Sanskrit. You can use English or Latin +or Arabic, any language will do. Sanskrit has no significance except in that Shiva was +talking to Parvati in Sanskrit. It is not that Sanskrit is something superior to any other +language, any language will do. First feel inside, in your consciousness, THE HONEY- +FILLED FOCI OF AWARENESS filled with letters: A, B, C, D... any letters of any +language. This can be done, and it is a very beautiful exercise. If you want to do it, close +your eyes and just see your consciousness inside being filled with words. + +Think of consciousness as a blackboard, then: A, B, C... Visualize all the words, all the +letters. Visualize these first as letters. "A": look at it as "A" as you write it. + +Write it with consciousness and look at it. Then by and by, forget the letter "A" and just +remember the sound of "A" — just the sound. Start with visualization — because eyes are +predominant for us. Ears are not so predominant. We are eye-oriented, eye-centered. + + + +Again, the reason is the same. Because eyes help us to survive more than anything else, +our consciousness is ninety percent in the eyes. Conceive of yourself without eyes, and +your whole life goes dead — then a very minor part remains. + +So first visualize. Use your eyes inwards and see the letters. Letters are more related to +ears than eyes because they are sounds, but for us, because we are reading, reading, +reading, they have become associated with eyes. Basically, they are associated with ears +— they are sounds. Start with the eyes, then forget the eyes by and by. Then move away +from the eyes to the ears. First imagine them as letters, then see them, hear them MORE +SUBTLY AS SOUNDS, THEN AS MOST SUBTLE FEELINGS. And this is a very +beautiful exercise. + +When you say "A", what is the feeling? You may not have been aware of it. What is the +feeling inside you? Whenever you use any sound, what type of feeling comes into +existence? We are so feeling-less that we have simply forgotten. When you see a sound, +what happens inside? You go on using it and the sound is even forgotten. You go on +seeing it. If I say "A", you will see it first. + +In your mind, "A" will become visible; you will visualize it. When I say "A", do not +visualize it. Just hear the sound "A", and then go and find out what happens in your +feeling center. Does nothing happen? + +Shiva says, move from letters to sounds, uncover sounds through the letters. Uncover +sounds, and then, through the sounds also, uncover feelings. Be aware of how you feel. +They say that man has now become very insensitive; he is the most insensitive animal on +earth. + +I was reading about one poet, a Gennan poet, and he relates one incident of his +childhood. His father was a lover of horses, so he had many horses at the house, a big +stable, but he would not allow this child to go to the stable. He was afraid, as the child +was very small. But when the father was not there the child would sometimes steal into +the stable where he had a friend — a horse. Whenever the child would go in, the horse +would make some sounds. + +And the poet has written, "Then I also started making sounds with the horse, because +there was no possibility of language. Then, in communication with that horse, for the first +time I became aware of sounds — their beauty, their feeling." + +You cannot be aware with a man because he is dead. A horse is more alive, and he has no +language. He has pure sound. He is filled with his heart, not with his mind. So that poet +remembers, "For the first time, I became aware of the beauty of sounds and their +meaning. + +This was not the meaning of words and thoughts, but a meaning filled with feeling." If +someone else was there, the horse would not make those sounds, so the child could +understand that the horse meant, "Do not come in. Someone is here and your father will +be angry." + +When there was no one, the horse would make the sounds meaning, "Come in. There is +no one." So the poet remembers that "It was a conspiracy, and he helped me very much, +that horse helped me very much. And when I would go and love that horse, he would +move his head in a particular way when he liked it. When he did not like it, he would not +move his head in that way. When he liked it, then it was a certain thing, he would express +it. When he was not in the mood, then he would not move in a certain way." + +And this poet says, "This continued for years. I would go and love that horse, and that + + + +love was so deep, I never felt any affinity with anyone else so deeply. Then one day when +I was stroking his neck and he was moving and enjoying it ecstatically, suddenly for the +first time I became aware of my hand, that I was stroking, and the horse stopped. Now he +would not move his neck." And that poet says, "Then for years I tried and tried, but there +was no response, the horse would not reply. Only later on did I become aware that +because I became aware of my hand and myself, the ego came in and the communication +broke. + +I couldn’t recapture again that communication with the horse." + +What happened? That was a feeling communication. The moment ego comes, words +come, language comes, thought comes, then the layer is changed completely. Now you +are above sounds; then you were below sounds. Those sounds are feelings, and the horse +could understand feelings. Now he couldn’t understand, so the communication broke. The +poet tried and tried — but no effort is successful because even your effort is the effort of +your ego. + +He tried to forget his hand, but he couldn't forget. How can you forget? It is impossible. +And the more you try to forget it, the more you remember. So you cannot forget anything +with effort. Effort will simply emphasize the memory more. The poet says, "I became +fixed with my hand; I couldn’t move that horse. I would go up to my hand, and then there +was no movement. The energy would not move into that horse and he became aware of +this." + +How did the horse become aware? If I suddenly start speaking some other language, then +the communication is broken, then you will not be able to understand me. And if this +language were not known to you, you would suddenly stop because now the language is +unknown to you. Thus, the horse stopped. + +Every child lives with feeling. First come sounds, then those sounds are filled with +feeling. Then come words, then thoughts, then systems, religions, philosophies. + +Then one goes farther and farther away from the center of feeling. + +This sutra says, come back, come down — down to the state of feeling. Feeling is not +your mind: that is why you are afraid of feeling. You are not afraid of reasoning. You are +always afraid of feeling because feeling can lead you into chaos. You will not be able to +control. With reason, the control is with you; with the head, you are the head. Below the +head you lose the head, you cannot control, you cannot manipulate. Feelings are just +below the mind — a link between you and the mind. + +Then Shiva says, THEN, EEAVING THEM ASIDE, BE FREE. Then leave the feelings. +And remember, only when you come to the deepest layer of feelings can you leave them. +You cannot leave them just now. You are not at the deepest layer of feelings, so how can +you leave them? First you have to leave philosophies — Hinduism, Christianity, +Mohammedanism — then you have to leave thoughts, then you have to leave words, then +you have to leave letters, then you have to leave sounds, then you have to leave feelings +— because you can leave only that which is there. You can leave that step upon which +you are standing; you cannot leave a step upon which you are not standing. + +You are standing at the step of philosophy, the farthest away one. That is why I insist so +much that unless you leave religion you cannot be religious. + + +This sutra, this technique, can be done very easily. The problem is not with feelings, the + + + +problem is with words. You can leave a feeling, just as you can undress — as you can get +out of your clothes. You can throw off your clothes; you can leave feelings simply in that +way. But right now you cannot do it, and if you try to do it, it will be impossible. So go +step by step. + +Imagine letters — A, B, C, D — then change your emphasis from the written letter to the +heart sound. You are moving deep, the surface is left behind. You are sinking deep — +then feel what feeling comes through a particular sound. + +Because of such techniques, India could discover many things. It could discover which +sounds are related to particular feelings. Because of that science, the MANTRA was +developed. A particular sound is related to a particular feeling, and it is never otherwise. +So if you create that sound within you, that feeling will be created. You can use any +sound, and then the related feeling will be created around you. That sound creates the +space to be fdled by a particular feeling. + +So do not use just any mantra, that is not good; it may be dangerous for you. Unless you +know, or unless a person who gives you the mantra knows, what particular sound creates +what particular feeling, and whether that feeling is needed by you or not, do not use any +mantra. + +There are mantras which are known as death mantras. If you repeat them, you will die +within a particular time. Within a particular period you will die, because they create in +you a longing for death. + +Freud says that man has two basic instincts: libido — eros — the will to live, the will to be, +the will to continue, the will to exist. And thanatos — the will to die. There are particular +sounds which, if you repeat them, the will to die will come to you. Then you would like +just to drop into death. There are sounds which give you eros — which give you more +libido, which give you more lust to live, to be. If you create those sounds within you, that +particular feeling will overwhelm you. There are sounds which give you a feeling of +peace and silence, there are sounds which create anger. So do not use any sound, any +mantra, unless it is given to you by a master who knows what is going to happen through +it. + +When you come down from sounds, you will be aware. Each sound has its counterpart in +feeling. Each sound has a corresponding feeling that goes with it, just hidden behind it. +Then move to the feeling; forget the sound and move to the feeling. It is difficult to +explain, but you can do it. And there were techniques for this. Particularly in Zen, there +were techniques. A particular mantra would be given to a seeker. If he was doing it +rightly inside, the master could know from the face. + +The master could know from the face whether he was doing it rightly or not because a +particular feeling would come. If the sound is created, then the feeling is bound to come, +and it will be on the face. You cannot deceive a master. He knows by your face what is +happening inside. + +Dozo was a great master, but he himself was very much disturbed, when he was a +disciple, about how his master came to know what he was experiencing. And the Zen +master moved with his staff and he would hit you immediately. If something goes wrong +with your sound inside, he will hit you immediately. So Dozo asked, "But how do you +know? And you hit me exactly in the right moment. How do you know?" + +The face expresses the feeling, not the sound. The sound cannot be expressed by the face, +but the face is bound to express the feeling. And the deeper you move, the more your face + + + +becomes flexible to express, more liquid. It immediately shows what is happening inside. +This face which you have right now will drop because this is a mask — this is not a face. +When you move in, masks fall down because they are not needed. Masks are needed for +others. + +Because of this, the old masters insisted on moving away from the world. This was so +that you could move away from the mask easily; otherwise others will be there, and +because of them you have to carry masks. You do not love your wife or your husband, +but you have to carry a mask — a loving face, a false loving face. + +The moment you enter the house, you arrange the face: you come in and you start +laughing. This is not your face. + +Zen masters insisted that first one should attain the original face, because with the +original face everything becomes easy. Then the master can simply know what is +happening. So enlightenment was never reported. If some seeker attained enlightenment, +he was not to report to the master that he had attained because the master would simply +know. He would tell the disciple. No disciple was allowed to tell the master, "I have +attained." There was no need. The face will show, the eyes will show, the very +movement, the walking, will show. Whatsoever he does, every gesture will show that he +has attained. + +When you move from sounds to feelings, you move into a very, very ecstatic world, an +existential world. You move away from the mind. Feelings are existential; that is what +the word means — you feel them. You cannot see them, you cannot hear them, you +simply feel them. When you come to this point, you can take the jump. This is the last +step. Now you are standing near an abyss; you can jump. + +And if you jump from the feelings, you jump into yourself. That abyss is you — not as +your mind, but as your being; not as the accumulated past, but as the present, here and +now. + +You move from the mind to the being, and the bridge, the link, is the feelings. + +But to come to the feelings you will have to leave many things — words, sounds, the +whole deception of the mind. THEN, LEAVING THEM ASIDE, BE FREE. + +You ARE free. This saying, BE FREE, doesn’t mean that you have to do something to be +free. THEN, LEAVING THEM ASIDE, BE FREE means you are free! Being is freedom; +mind is bondage. That is why it is said that mind is the SANSAR, the world. + +Do not leave the world... you cannot leave it. If the mind is there, you will create another +world; the seed is there. You can move to a mountain, to a retreat, but you will move with +the mind; you cannot leave it here. The world moves with you, you will create another +world. Even in your retreat you will start creating it again, because the seed is there. You +will create relationships again. It may be with the trees, it may be with birds, but you will +create relationships again, you will create expectations again, and you will go on +spreading the net because the seed is there. You will again be in a world. + +Mind is the world, and you cannot leave mind anywhere. You can leave it only if you +move within. So the only Himalaya is this; no other Himalaya will do. If you move +within from words to feelings, and from feelings to being, you are moving away from the +world. And once you know this inner abyss of being, then you can be anywhere, even in +hell. Then it makes no difference. + + +It makes no difference then! If you are without mind, hell cannot enter you, and with + + + +mind ONLY hell enters. The mind is the door to hell. + +LEAVING THEM ASIDE, BE FREE. But do not try directly with feelings, you will not +succeed. Try first with words. But with words also you will not succeed if you do not +leave philosophies, if you do not leave thoughts. Words are just units — and if you give +significance to words you cannot leave them. + +Know well that language is a human creation. It is utilitarian, necessary, and the +meanings we have given to sounds are our own creation. If you can understand this well, +then you can move easily. If someone is saying something against the Koran, or against +the Vedas, how do you feel? Can you laugh about it or does something clench within +you? Can you laugh about it? Someone is insulting the Gita or someone is saying some +derogatory thing against Krishna or Ram or Christ — can you laugh? Can you see through +the words, that these are mere words? No, you will be hurt. Then it is difficult to lose +words. + +See that words are just words — noises with agreed-upon meanings and nothing else. Be +convinced of it. And it is so! First become detached from words. If there is detachment +from words, then you can understand that these are just noises. + +It is just like in the military where they use numbers. One soldier is number 101: he can +become identified with '101'. + +And if someone says something derogatory against the number 101, he will feel insulted, +he will start fighting. And '101' is just a number, but he has become identified with it. +Your name is just a number, just an index number. Things will be difficult otherwise, so +we have labelled you. That is just a label; any other label can do the same work. But it is +not just a label for you, it has gone deep; your name has become the center of your ego. + +So they say, the so-called wise ones, they say, "Live for your name. See that your name +remains pure. Respectability of your name must be there, and even if you die your name +will live." It was never there, it is just a code number. You will die and the name will +live... When you yourself cannot live, how is the label going to live? + +Look at words — at their futility, their meaninglessness, and do not become attached to +any word. Only then can you do this technique. + +The second technique: + +BATHE IN THE CENTER OF SOUND, AS IN THE CONTINUOUS SOUND OF A +WATERFALL, OR BY PUTTING THE FINGERS IN THE EARS, HEAR THE +SOUND OF SOUNDS. + +This technique can be done in many ways. One way is to begin by just sitting anywhere. +Sounds are always present. It may be in a market or it may be at a Himalayan retreat: +sounds are there. Sit silently, and with sound there is something very special. Whenever +there are sounds, you are the center. + +All the sounds come to you from everywhere, from all directions. + +With sight, with eyes, this is not so. Sight is linear. I see you — then there is a line toward +you. Sound is circular, it is not linear. So all sounds come in circles and you are the +center. Wherever you are, you are always the center of sound. For sounds, you are always +God, the center of the whole universe. Every sound is coming to you, moving toward +you, in circles. + +This technique says, BATHE IN THE CENTER OF SOUND. Wherever you are, if you +are doing this technique, just close your eyes and feel the whole universe filled with + + + +sound. Feel as if every sound is moving toward you and you are the center. Even this +feeling that you are the center will give you a very deep peace. The whole universe +becomes the circumference and you are the center, and everything is moving toward you, +falling toward you. + +... AS IN THE CONTINUOUS SOUND OF A WATERFALL. If you are sitting by the +side of a waterfall, close your eyes and feel the sound all around you, falling on you from +every side, creating a center in you from every side. Why this emphasis on feeling that +you are in the center? Because in the center there is no sound. The center is without +sound, that is why you can hear sounds; otherwise you could not hear them. A sound +cannot hear another sound. Because you are soundless at your center, you can hear +sounds. + +The center is absolute silence. That is why you can hear sounds entering you, coming to +you, penetrating you, encircling you. + +If you can find out where is the center, where is the field in you to where every sound is +coming, suddenly sounds will disappear and you will enter into soundlessness. If you can +feel a center where every sound is being heard, there is a sudden transference of +consciousness. One moment you will be hearing the whole world filled with sounds, and +another moment your awareness will suddenly turn in and you will hear the +soundlessness, the center of life. + +Once you have heard that, then no sound can disturb you. It comes to you, but it never +reaches you. It is always coming to you, but it never reaches you. There is a point where +no sound enters. That point is YOU. Do it in a market, there is no other place like a +market. It is so much filled with sounds, mad sounds. But do not start thinking about +sounds — that this is good and that is bad, and this is disturbing and that is very beautiful +and hannonious. You are not supposed to think about sounds, you are simply supposed to +think of the center. You are not supposed to think about every sound moving toward you +— whether it is good, bad, beautiful. You are just to remember that you are the center and +all the sounds are moving toward you — every sound, whatsoever the sort. + +In the beginning you will get dizzy because you have not been hearing whatsoever is +happening all around. + +Your hearing is selective, your seeing is selective. And now scientific research says that +ninety-eight percent is not heard, only two percent of whatsoever is happening all around +you is heard. Otherwise, if you heard one hundred percent of what is happening all +around you, you will simply go mad. Previously, it was thought that the senses are the +doors, the openings, the windows for the outside to enter inside. Now they say they are +not doors, and they are not so open as it was thought. Rather, they are like a watchman, a +censor, who is every moment watching what is to be allowed in or not. + +Only two percent of happenings are allowed in — and you are already mad with two +percent. With one hundred percent, with a total opening, with everything opened, every +sense opened, functioning, and everything being allowed in, you will go mad. So when +you try this method, in the first step you will feel a dizziness coming to you. Do not be +afraid, go on feeling the center — and allow everything, whatsoever is happening. Allow +everything to move in. + +Relax yourself, relax your watch towers, your senses; relax everything, let everything +enter you. You have become more liquid, open; everything is coming to you, all sounds +are moving toward you. Then move with the sounds, and come to the center where you + + + +hear them. + +Sounds are not heard in the ears, the ears cannot hear them. + +The ears only do a transmission work, and in the transmission they cut out much which is +useless for you. They choose, they select, and then those Sanskrit sounds enter you. Now +find out within where is your center. The ears are not the center, you are hearing from +somewhere deep down. The ears are simply sending you selected sounds. Where are you? +Where is your center? + +If you are working with sounds, then sooner or later you will be surprised — because the +center is not in the head. It appears to be in the head because you have never heard +sounds, you have heard only words. With words the head is the center, with sounds it is +not the center. That is why in Japan they say that man thinks not through the head, but +through the belly — because they have been working with sounds for a long time. + +You have seen in every temple a gong. That is placed there to create sounds around a +seeker. Someone is meditating, and the gong is sounded or a bell is rung. A disturbance +seems to have been created by the very sound of the bell; someone is meditating, and this +bell or gong seems disturbing. In a temple, every visitor who comes will hit the gong or +ring the bell. With someone meditating there, this would seem to be a constant +disturbance. It is not, because the person is waiting for this sound. + +So every visitor is helping. Again and again the bell is hit, and the sound is created and +the meditator again enters himself. + +He looks at the center, where this sound goes deep. There is one hit on the bell — the +visitor has done that. Now the second hit will be inside the meditator, somewhere inside. +Where is it? The sound always hits at the belly, at the navel, never in the head. If it hits in +the head, you can understand well that it is not sound, it is words. Then you have started +thinking about the sound. Then the purity is lost. + +Now there is much research about children who are in the womb. They are also hit by +sounds and they react to sounds. They cannot react to language. They have no head yet, +they have no reasoning, and they do not yet know language and the agreed-upon customs +of the society. They do not know about language, but they hear the sounds. And every +sound affects the child more than it affects the mother, because the mother cannot hear +the sounds — she hears the words. And we are creating mad sounds, chaotic, and those +sounds are hitting the unborn children. They will be born mad; you have already +disturbed them too much. + +Even plants are affected by sound. They grow more if some musical sounds are created +around them; they grow less if some chaotic sounds are created around them. You can +help them to grow. You can help them in many ways through sounds. + +Now they say that because of traffic noises — which are not hannonious and cannot be — +man is going mentally insane, and it seems that the limit has come. + +If it grows more, then there is no hope for man. These sounds are hitting you +continuously, but if you think about them they will hit your head, and that is not the +center: the navel is the center. So do not think about them. + +All the mantras are meaningless sounds. And if some master says that "This is the +meaning of this mantra," then it is not a mantra at all. A mantra needs to be, of necessity, +without meaning. It has some work, but no meaning. It has to do something within you, +but it has no meaning because it has just to be a pure sound within you. That is why we + + + +evolved the mantra AUM. It is meaningless, it is just a pure sound. If this pure sound is +created within you, if you can create it within, then too the same technique can be used. +BATHE IN THE CENTER OF SOUND, AS IN THE CONTINUOUS SOUND OF A +WATERFALL. OR, BY PUTTING THE FINGERS IN THE EARS, HEAR THE +SOUND OF SOUNDS. You can create the sound just by using your finger, or with +anything which closes your ears forcibly. Then a certain sound is heard. What is that +sound, and why do you hear it when the ears are closed, when the ears are plugged? + +It happened in America, that a train passed through a certain neighborhood in the middle +of the night, somewhere about 2:00 a.m. A new line was inaugurated and the train +stopped moving on the old route. But a very strange phenomenon happened. The people +who were living in that neighborhood where the train had stopped moving complained to +the police that at about 2:00 a.m. something mysterious was heard. There were so many +reports, it had to be investigated what was the matter. Strange sounds were heard at about +two. They were never heard when the train was passing; the people had become +accustomed to the train. Now suddenly the train stopped. They were waiting to hear it in +their sleep; they had become accustomed to it, conditioned. They were waiting, and the +sound was not there. Absence was heard, and this absence was something new. They felt +uneasy about it, they couldn’t sleep. + +So for the first time it was understood that if you are constantly hearing something and it +stops, you will hear the absence of it. So do not think that you will simply not hear it. + +You will hear the absence, the negative part of it will be heard. If I look at you, and then +if I close my eyes, I see your negative. If you look at the window and then close your +eyes you will see the negative of the window, and the negative can be so forceful that if +you suddenly look at the wall the negative will be projected on the wall. You will be +seeing the negative. + +Just as there are negatives of photographs, there are negative sounds. Not only can the +eyes see the negative, the ears can even hear the negative. So when you close your ears, +you hear the negative world of sounds. All the sounds have stopped. Suddenly a new +sound is heard. This sound is the absence of sound. + +A gap has come in. You are missing something, and then you hear this absence. + +OR, BY PUTTING THE FINGERS IN THE EARS, HEAR THE SOUND OF SOUNDS. +That negative sound is known as the sound of sounds — because it is not really a sound, +but its absence. Or, it is a natural sound, because it is not created by anything. + +All sounds are created. The sound you hear when you close your ears is not a created +sound. If the whole world becomes absolutely silent, then you will hear the silence also. +Pascal is reported to have said, "The moment I think about the infinite cosmos, the +silence of the infinite cosmos makes me very much afraid." The silence makes him afraid +because sounds are only on the earth. Sounds need atmosphere. The moment you go +beyond the earth's atmosphere there are no sounds — only absolute silence. That silence +you can create even on the earth, if you close both of your ears completely. Then you are +on the earth, but you have moved; you have dropped below sounds. + +Astronauts are being trained for many things, and one thing is to be in the silence. They +have to be trained in silent chambers so that they become accustomed to soundlessness; +otherwise they will go mad. Many problems face them, and this is one of the deepest +problems: how to be away from the human world of sounds. Then you become isolated. + +If you are lost in the forest and you hear a certain word, you may not know the source but + + + +you are less afraid. + + +Someone is there! You are not alone! In soundlessness, you are alone. In a crowd, if you +close both of your ears totally and move in, you are alone. The crowd has disappeared, +because it was through sounds that you could know others were there. + +PUTTING THE FINGERS IN THE EARS, HEAR THE SOUND OF SOUNDS. This +absence of sound is a very subtle experience. What will it give to you? The moment there +are no sounds, you fall back upon yourself. With sounds we move away, with sounds we +move to the other. Try to understand this: with sounds we are related to the other, we +communicate with the other. + +So even a blind man is not in so much difficulty as a man who cannot speak, who is +dumb. Observe a person who is dumb: he looks inhuman. A blind man never looks +inhuman, but a dumb person looks inhuman; the face gives a feeling of something which +is not human. And a dumb person is in more difficulty than a blind man. With the blind +man the problem is that he cannot see, but he can communicate. He can become a part of +a greater humanity, he can become a part of a society, of a family; he can love, he can +speak. A dumb man is suddenly out of society. He cannot speak, he cannot communicate, +he cannot express. + +Try to imagine yourself in an air-conditioned glass room, a soundproof room. No sound +can enter to you, and you cannot scream, you cannot do anything to express yourself, the +sound will not go out. + +In a glass room you can see the whole world moving around you, but neither can you +speak to them nor can they speak to you. You will feel hopelessly frustrated, and the +whole thing will become a nightmare. + +A dumb man is in a nightmare continuously. Without communicating he is not part of +humanity. Without expression he cannot flower. He cannot reach anyone and no one can +reach him. He is with you and far away, and the gap is unbridgeable. + +If sound is the vehicle to move to the other, then soundlessness becomes the vehicle to +move to oneself. With sound you communicate with the other; with soundlessness you +fall down into your own abyss, into yourself. That is why so many techniques use +soundlessness to move within. + +Become absolutely dumb and deaf — even if only for a few moments — and you cannot +go anywhere else than to yourself. Suddenly you will find that you are standing within; +no movement will be possible. That is why silence was practiced so much. In it, all the +bridges for moving to the other are broken. + +Gurdjieff used to give long silent periods to his disciples, and then he would insist that +not only was language not to be used, but there was to be no communication, no gesture +— neither with the eyes nor the hands. No communication was to be used. Silence means +NO communication. So he would force the group to live in a house — twenty, thirty or +forty people in one bungalow, in one house — and than he would say, "Remain here in +this house as if you are alone. + +You cannot go out." Forty persons would be there, and he would say, "Move in the +house, live in the house as if you are alone. No communication! Do not recognize that the +other is, not even by the eyes. Move completely as if you are the only person residing in +the house." With three months of living in this way, absolutely dumb and deaf, with no +possibility of communicating, there would be no possibility to move out. + + + +I do not know whether you have observed or not, but in society those who can talk much +become prominent; those who can communicate their thoughts easily become leaders — +religious, political, literary, any type. Those who can communicate their thoughts, those +who can talk efficiently, they become leaders. Why? They can reach more people, they +can reach to greater masses. + +Have you ever heard of any dumb person becoming a leader? You can find a blind man +becoming a leader; there is no problem. And sometimes he may become a great leader, +because all that his eyes are not doing, all those energies will be transferred to his ears. +But a dumb man cannot become a leader in any walk of life. He cannot communicate, he +cannot become social. + +Society is a language. Language is basic to social existence — to relationship. If you leave +language, you are alone. The world may be filled with millions, but if you lose language +you are alone. + +Meher Baba stayed continuously for forty years in silence. + +What was he doing in silence? Really, you cannot do anything in silence because every +act is somehow related with others. Even in imagination, if you do something you will +have to imagine others; you cannot do it alone. If you are absolutely alone, action +becomes impossible. Even the imagination to act becomes impossible. Acting is related +to others. If you drop language inside, all doing drops. You are, but you are not doing +anything. + +Meher Baba would tell his disciples, by writing a note, "On this particular date I am +going to break my silence," and then he would not break it. This continued for forty +years, and then he died in silence. What was the problem? Why should he say, "Now, this +year, on this day, on this date, I am going to speak?" And why should he postpone it +again? What was happening inside? Why would he not keep his promise? + +Once you know silence for such a long time, you cannot fall back to sounds again; it +becomes impossible. There is a rule, and he didn’t follow the rule so he could not come +back. There is a rule that one should not remain silent for more than three years. Once +you cross the limit, you cannot come back to the world of sounds. You may try, but it is +impossible. It is easy to move from sounds to silence, but it is very difficult to move from +silence to sounds. Beyond three years many things simply become impossible. The +mechanism cannot function the same way again. + +It has to be used continuously; at the most, one can remain silent for three years. Beyond +that, if you remain silent the mechanism which can produce sounds and words cannot be +used again, it becomes dead. + +Secondly, the person becomes so much silent remaining with himself alone that it will +now be a misery to communicate. Then to say something to someone will be like talking +to a wall, because the person who has remained silent for such a long time knows that +you cannot understand whatsoever he is saying. Regardless of what he is saying, he +knows he is not saying that which he wants to say. The whole thing has gone. After such +a deep silence, he cannot move again to the world of sounds. + +So Meher Baba tried and tried, but he couldn’t bring himself to speak again. He wanted to +say something, and he had something worth saying, but the mechanism and the +movements necessary to come back to a lower realm were impossible. Thus, he died +without saying what he wanted to say. + +It will be helpful to understand this: whatsoever you are doing, always go on doing the + + + +opposite with it. Go on changing to the opposite always. Remain silent for a few hours, +then talk. Do not become fixed in anything — you will be more alive and more moving. +Do meditation for a few days, and then stop suddenly and do everything that can create +tension in you. Then move again to meditation. + + +Go on moving between the opposites, you will be more alive and dynamic. Do not get +fixed. Once you get fixed, you will not be able to move to the other extreme, and the +ability to move to the other extreme means life. If you are not able to move, you are +already dead. This movement is very good. + +Gurdjieff advised his disciples to have sudden changes. He would insist on fasting and +then he would say, "Now eat as much as you can." Then suddenly he would say, "Go on a +fast." Then again he would say, "Start eating." He would say, "Be awake for a few days +and nights continuously, then fall asleep for a few nights." This movement between the +polar opposites gives you a dynamism, an aliveness. + +OR, BY PUTTING THE FINGERS IN THE EARS, HEAR THE SOUND OF SOUNDS. +In one technique, two opposites have been shown. BATHE IN THE CENTER OF +SOUND, AS IN THE CONTINUOUS SOUND OF A WATERFALL - this is one +extreme. OR, BY PUTTING THE FINGERS IN THE EARS, HEAR THE SOUND OF +SOUNDS — this is another extreme. + +One part is to hear the sounds coming to your center; another part is to stop all sounds +and feel the soundless center. These both have been given in one technique for a special +purpose — so that you can move from one to the other. + +The OR is not a choice to do this or that. Do both! That is why both have been given in +one technique. First do one for a few months, then do the other for a few months. + +You will be more alive, and you will know two extremes. And if you can move to the two +extremes easily, you can remain young forever. Those who get fixed at any extreme +become old and die. + + +THE END. + + + +Chapter 26: Tantra: anacceptance of the peaks and the valleys + + +The first question: + +Question 1 + +LAST NIGHT YOU DISCUSSED THE CENSORSHIP AND SUPPRESSION BY THE +CONSCIOUS MIND OF THE UNCONSCIOUS INSTINCTS, AND YOU SAID THAT +THE UNCONSCIOUS INSTINCTS BELONG TO THE ANIMAL HERITAGE IN +MAN'S EVOLUTION. THEN IS IT NOT GOOD TO CHANNEL AND REGULATE +THEM ACCORDING TO THE INTELLIGENCE, DISCRIMINATION AND ART OF +LIVING WHICH BELONG TO THE CONSCIOUS MIND? + +Man is an animal, but not only an animal: he is more also. But that "more" cannot deny +the animal, it has to absorb it. Man is more than an animal, but the animal cannot be +denied. It has to be absorbed creatively. You cannot leave it aside, it is in your very roots; +you have to use it creatively. So the first thing to remember is not to be negative about +your animal heritage. Once you start thinking in negative terms you will become +destructive to yourself, because you are ninety-nine percent animal. + +If you create a division, you are fighting a losing battle; you cannot win. The result of +your fight will be quite the opposite, because ninety-nine percent is animal. Only one +percent of the mind is conscious, and this one percent cannot win against the ninety -nine +percent. It is going to be defeated. That is why there is so much frustration, because +everyone is defeated by his own animal. You can never succeed. Of necessity you are +going to be a failure, because that one percent cannot succeed against the ninety-nine +percent. + +It cannot even be divided from the ninety-nine percent. + +It is just like a flower: it cannot go against the roots, it cannot go against the whole tree. +And while you are against your animal heritage, you are being fed by it. You are alive +because of it. If your animal dies this moment, you will die immediately. Your mind +exists as a flower; your animal heritage is the whole tree. Do not be negative — that is +suicidal. And if you are divided against yourself, you can never attain anything which is +blissful. + +You are creating a hell, and the hell is nowhere else but in a divided personality. In the +split personality is the hell. And hell is not something geographical, hell is psychological +— and heaven also. The personality which is a whole, one unit, with no inner division and +conflict, is heaven. + +So the first thing I would like to say is, do not be negative. Do not divide yourself, do not +go against yourself, do not become two. The animal that is there is not something bad. +The animal in you is a great potential. That is your past and also your future, because +much is hidden in it. Uncover it, develop it, allow it to grow and go beyond it, but do not +fight with it. That is one of the basic teachings of tantra. + +Other traditions are divisive. They divide you, they create a fight within you. Tantra is +not divisive, it doesn’t believe in fight. Tantra is absolutely positive; it doesn’t believe in +saying no. + +Tantra believes in saying yes — yes to the whole of life. And through 'yes' the +transfonnation happens, and through 'no' there is only disturbance — no transformation is +possible. Against whom are you fighting? Against yourself? How can you win? And the + + + +major part of you is from the animal, so the major part will win. So those who fight, they +are creating their own defeats. If you want to be defeated, fight. If you want to win, do +not fight. + +Victory needs knowledge, not fight. Fight is a subtle violence. And this is strange, but +this has happened: those who talk about nonviolence to others are very much violent +against themselves. There are teachings and traditions which say, "Do not be violent to +anyone," but those same teachings are very much violent as far as you are inwardly +concerned. They teach you to be violent with yourself, but not to be violent with others. +All types of asceticism, renunciation, negative attitudes, life-denying philosophies, are +based on maintaining a violent attitude toward yourself. They tell you to be violent with +yourself. + +Tantra is absolutely nonviolent. It says, if you cannot be nonviolent with yourself, you +cannot be nonviolent with anyone else — that is impossible. A person who is violent to +himself will be violent to everyone; in his nonviolence also he will be just hiding his +violence. Aggression can be turned against yourself, but that aggressive attitude is +destructive. + + +But that doesn’t mean to remain the animal which you are. The moment you accept your +heritage, the moment you accept your past, the future becomes an opening. Through +acceptance is the opening. The animal is the past; it need not be the future. There is no +need to go against the past — and you cannot go. Use it creatively. + +What can be done to use it creatively? The first thing is to be profoundly aware of its +existence. Those who fight are not aware of it. Because they are afraid, they push the +animal behind, they push the animal into the unconscious. Really, there need not be any +unconscious, but because of suppression the unconscious is created. You feel many +things within which you condemn without understanding them. A man who understands +condemns nothing; there is no need. He can even use poison as a medicine because he +knows. Everything can be used creatively. Because you do not know, in ignorance poison +is poison. With wisdom it can become the elixir. + +The person who is fighting against his sex, anger, greed, against the animal, what will he +do? He will suppress. Fighting is suppression. He will push down anger, sex, greed, +hatred, jealousy. He will push everything down somewhere underground, and he will +create a false structure above ground. The structure will be false because the energies +have not been transformed which can make it real. The structure is phony; underground, +the real energies have been repressed. + +Those real energies will always remain there working, any moment they can explode. + +You are just sitting on a volcano, and every moment that volcano is trying to erupt. If it +does, your structure will be shaken. + +Whatsoever you have built in the name of religion, morality, culture, is a phony structure +that is above ground — just a false facade. Underground the real man is hiding. So your +animal is not very far away; your facade is just skin-deep. Someone insults you, and the +gentleman disappears and the animal comes out. The gentleman is just skin-deep; the +volcano is just near. Any moment it can be brought out, and when it comes out, your +intelligence, your morality, your religion, your so-called being above animal things, +simply disappear. When the real asserts, the false disappears. Only when the real goes +back underground does the false come again. + + + +When you are angry, where is your mind, where is your consciousness, where is your +morality? Where are your vows that you have taken so many times — that "Now I am not +going to be angry again?" When anger comes they all simply disappear. When anger has +moved again to its cave, its underground cave, you start repenting. Those phony fellows +have gathered again. They start talking, condemning, and planning for the future, and +again in the future the same will happen; when anger will come the shadows will +disappear. + + +Your consciousness right now is just a shadow. It is not a real thing; it has no substance +in it. You can take a vow of BRAMACHARYA, of celibacy — it makes no difference to +your sex instinct. The sex instinct simply goes underground, and when it comes up, your +vows of brahmacharya, of celibacy, will prove to be made of just very dream-like stuff. +They cannot face the real thing. + +So these are the two attitudes. You can either suppress sex — then you will never go +beyond it — or you can use your sex energy in a creative way. Not saying no to it, but +giving it a deep yes; not forcing it to go underground, but creating a structure above +ground with it. Then you will be a real man. It will be difficult, obviously; that is why we +choose the easier path. It is easier to have a false structure, because nothing is needed. +Only one thing is needed: to deceive yourself, that is all. If you can deceive yourself, you +can create a false structure very easily. Nothing will change really, but you will go on +thinking that everything has changed. + +This is easy, to create an illusion. To create a reality is a difficult task, it is arduous. But it +is worthwhile, because once you have created something with real energies, your +structure cannot be shattered. If sex is above ground, then you can create something out +of it — for example, love. If sex is transfonned, it becomes love; if it is suppressed, it +becomes hatred. + + +You become afraid of love if you suppress sex. A person who has suppressed sex will +always be afraid of love, because the moment love comes sex will follow. Love is of the +soul and sex is of the body, so love cannot be allowed to happen because then sex will +follow. It will be just somewhere near, by the corner. So a person who has suppressed sex +cannot be loving. He may show it, he may pretend that he is very loving, but he cannot be +because he is so afraid. He cannot touch you with a loving hand because the fear is there. +The loving hand can any moment turn out to be a sexual touch, so he will be afraid; he +will not allow you to touch him. + +He may create many justifications for it but the real thing is fear — fear of the instinct +which he has repressed. And he will be filled with hatred, because any energy that is +repressed reverses itself and goes to its original nature. + +Sex moves easily toward love; that is a natural flow. If you prevent it, if you create +hindrances to its path, it will become hatred. So your so-called saints and so-called moral +teachers, if you look deep into them you will find them filled with hatred. And that is +bound to be, it is natural. Sex is hidden there, any moment it can erupt. They are sitting +on a dangerous volcano. If you push down energies, you are just postponing a task, and +the more it is postponed, the more difficult it will be. + + + +Tantra says, create your life with real energies — and real energies are all animal +energies. But when I say animal, there is no condemnation in it. The word 'animal’ for me +is not condemnatory, as it is for you. The animal is beautiful in itself, the animal in itself +is nothing to be condemned. The animal within you is pure energy, moving according to +natural laws. + +It has been asked, "What should we do consciously? Should we not channel? Should we +not control?" No! Your consciousness is not to control, your consciousness is not to +channel. Your consciousness can do only one thing: your consciousness is to understand, +and understanding in itself becomes the transformation. + +Tantra will say, understand sex, do not try to channel it. If you do not understand it, every +effort is bound to be a failure, and harmful. So do not do anything. First understand it, +and through understanding the path will be revealed. You are not to force your energies +on that path. Through understanding you come to know the law, just like in science. + +What are you doing in science? You come to understand a law; a natural mystery is +revealed. Once the natural mystery is revealed, you can use the energy creatively. + +Without your knowing the inherent law, all efforts are doomed. So tantra says, +understand the animal, because in the animal is hidden the potential for your future. + +Really, it can be said that in the animal God is hidden. The animal is your past, God is +your future — but the future is hidden in your past, in seed form. Understand whatsoever +your natural forces are. Accept them, understand them. Your mind is not to be there +mastering; it is not there to control them and fight with them, it is there to understand +them. + +Really, if you understand them, you are using your mind rightly. Understand sex, +understand anger, understand greed. Be alert; try to find out their ways — how they work, +what are their functions. And be constantly aware of the very movement of these animal +instincts within. If you can be conscious of these animal instincts, there will be no +division, you will not have an unconscious mind. If you can move with these instincts +deep within, you will have only a conscious mind; there will be no unconscious. + +The unconscious is there because of repression. You have closed the major part of your +being to consciousness because you are afraid. You cannot look at your own reality. You +are so afraid that you have already moved out of the house — you just live on the +verandah. You never go in because the fear is there: if you come face to face with +yourself, all your imagination, all your illusions about yourself will fall down. + +You think yourself to be a saint, you think yourself to be a religious person, you think +yourself to be this and that. + +If you face your reality, all these illusions will evaporate. And everyone has created an +image of himself. That image is false, but we cling to the image and this clinging +becomes the barrier toward moving within. + +So the first thing is to accept the animal. It is there, and nothing is wrong about it. It is +your past, and you cannot deny your past, you can only use it. If you are wise, you will +use it and create a better future out of it. If you are foolish you will fight with it, and +through fight the future will be destroyed. Fight with a seed, and you will destroy it. Use +it, give it soil, help it, protect it so that the seed becomes a tree, an alive tree, and the +future blossoms through it. + +The animal is your seed. Do not fight with it. Tantra has no condemnation against it, +simply love for it, because the whole future is hidden in it. Know it well, and then you + + + +can use it and you can thank it. + +I have heard that when St. Francis died, when he was just on his deathbed, suddenly he +opened his eyes and thanked his body before going to his death. Before moving to the +other world, he thanked his body. He said, "Much was hidden in you, and you helped me +so much. And I was so ignorant, and there were times when I even fought with you. +There were times I even thought about you in inimical terms. But you were always a +friend, and it is because of you I could move to such a state of consciousness." + + +This thanksgiving to the body is beautiful. But St. Francis could understand it only in the +end. Tantra says, try to understand in the beginning. If you only thank your body when +you are dying, it will be of no use. + +Your body is a treasury of hidden forces, of mysterious possibilities. Tantra says that in +your body is the whole cosmos in miniature: it is just a miniature of the whole cosmos. + +Do not fight with it. What is your sex if the body is a miniature? If really this is so, that +your body is the whole cosmos in miniature, what is sex? That which is creation in the +cosmos is sex in you. Throughout the whole cosmos, creation is going on every moment +— that is sex in you. And if there is so much force in it, it is because you are needed to be +a creator. + +If sex is so powerful, it only means for tantra that you cannot be allowed to be non- +creative; you must create. If you cannot create something greater, then at least create life. +If you cannot create anything better than you, then at least create someone who will +replace you when you die. Sex is so forceful because the cosmos cannot allow you to be +non-creative, and you are fighting with it. Use it. + +There is no need to use sex only in reproduction. In every creation sex is used. That is +why a great poet, a great painter, may not feel so much of an urge for sex. But the reason +is not that he is a saint. + +The reason is simply, that he is creating something greater and the need is fulfilled. + +A great musician is creating music. No father can feel so much fulfilled as a musician +feels when great music is created, and no son can give so much happiness to any parent +as a great piece of music can give to the musician, or great poetry can give to the poet. +Because he is creating on higher realms, nature relieves him of lower creation: the energy +has moved higher. Tantra says, do not fight with the energy, allow the energy to move +higher. And there are many realms of higher movement and many dimensions. + +Buddha is neither a painter nor a musician nor a poet, but he has gone beyond sex. What +has happened to him? The highest creation is the creation of oneself. The highest creation +is the creation of total consciousness within, creation of a whole within, oneness. That is +the peak, the Himalayan peak. Buddha is at that peak, he has created himself. When you +move in sex, you create your body; the replica is created. When you move higher, you +create spirit, you create soul. Or if you will allow me the expression, you create God. + +You have heard that God created the world, but I say to you that you have the potentiality +to create God — and unless you create him you will never be fulfilled. So do not think +that God is in the beginning. Rather, it will be better to think that God is in the end. + +God is not the cause of the world, but the teleology, the very end, the very peak. If you +flower in your totality, you will become a god. That is why we call Buddha a god — and +he never believed in God. This is very paradoxical. He never believed in God; he is one + + + +of the deepest atheistic minds ever bom. He says there is no God, but we called Buddha +himself divine. + +H. G. Wells has written that Gautam Buddha was the most godless man and the most +god-like. What happened to this Gautam? He created, he gave birth to the highest peak, +the highest possibility. The ultimate had happened in him; then he was no longer creating +anything — there was no need. It would have been futile for Buddha to write poetry, it +would have been futile for him to paint. It would have been childish. He created the +ultimate; he gave himself a new birth. The old was used completely to give birth to the +new. And because it is an ultimate phenomenon, the whole past had been used. The past +disappeared, the animal was no more, because when the tree is bom the seed disappears. +The seed cannot be there. + +Jesus says, unless a seed of corn falls to the ground and dies, nothing can happen. Once +the seed falls to the ground and dies, the new life bubbles up through it. The death is only +a death of the seed, of the past. But there can be no death without giving birth to the new; +something new will come out of it. + + +Tantra says, do not try to control. Who are you to control, and how will you be able to +control? Your control will be just illusory. Try to understand. Try to understand the inner +nature, the phenomenon, the dynamics of the energies, and that understanding will +automatically change you. Change is not an effort. If change is an effort, then it cannot +create bliss. + +Bliss never happens through effort. Effort is always tension-creating; it gives anguish. +Effort is always ugly because you are forcing something. Understanding is not an effort; +it is beautiful, it is a spontaneous happening. Do not control. If you try, you will be a +failure, and you will destroy yourself. Understand! Let understanding be the only law, the +only SADHANA — spiritual practice. Leave everything to understanding. If +understanding cannot do anything then it cannot be done, so forget it. All that can be +done can be done through understanding. + +So tantra says, accept things because acceptance will be needed to understand. You +cannot understand anything if you deny. If I hate you, I cannot look into your eyes, I +cannot see your face. I will turn about, I will escape from you, I will not look at you +directly. When I love you, only then can I look into your eyes. When I love you deeply, +only then can I see your face. + +Only love sees a face; otherwise you never see faces. You move, you look, but that look +is just casual, not deep. + +It touches, but it never penetrates. But when you love, then your whole energy becomes +your eyes. Then the energy moves, touches deep, goes deep down into the other person, +meets at his center of being. Then only can you see and know. + +That is why in the old biblical language they have used the word 'know' for sex, for love +— for deep love. It is not coincidental. In the Bible it is reported that "Adam knew his +wife Eve, and then Cain was bom." This use of 'know' for deep love, for sex, is strange +but very meaningful, because when you know someone it means you have loved +someone. There is no other way to know someone. + +And it is not only with persons, it is so with energies also. If you want to know your inner +being and the multi-dimensional phenomenon of energies, love! Do not hate the animal, +love it. And you are not unrelated to it, you are part of it. The animal has pushed you to + + + +this point where you have become man — be grateful to it. + +It is sheer ungratefulness when people go on condemning the animal in man. This is +sheer ingratitude. The animal has pushed you to this point where you have become man, +and the animal can push you to the point where you can become God. It is the animal that +is pushing you. Understand it — its ways, how it works — and that understanding will +become transformation. + +So no control, no effort to become the boss — no! Why are you so afraid of your animal? +Because your mind is really impotent; that is why you are so afraid. + +Why do you want to control it? If you are really the master, the animal will follow you. +But you know well that the animal is the master and you have to follow him. That is why +there is this whole effort to become the master. + +You know very well that anything real that happens, happens through the animal, and +anything bogus that happens, happens through the mind. This awareness creates fear. + +That is why you want to try to become the master, but a master is never born out of +effort. Only slaves try to become masters. A master is simply a master. + +I will tell you one story... It happened in the house of a great warrior. One night he +suddenly became aware of a mouse. He was a great warrior, a great swordsman. He +became very much angry because the mouse was sitting just in front of him and looking +into his eyes. No one had ever dared so much as the mouse was daring. So he pulled out +his sword, but the mouse would not run. Then he attacked the mouse, but suddenly the +mouse jumped and the sword was broken in pieces; it fell on the floor. + +Of course, the warrior became just mad. He tried and tried, and the more he tried, the +more he was defeated. It is difficult to fight with a mouse, and once you have started +fighting you have accepted defeat. The mouse became bold. With every failure of the +warrior, the mouse became more bold. He simply jumped on the warrior's bed. + +The warrior went out and asked his friends what to do. "This has never happened in my +life," he said. "No one can dare so much as an ordinary mouse! But it seems miraculous +— I am totally defeated." So the friends said, "It is nonsense to fight with a mouse. It is +better to bring in a cat." + +But the rumor went out that the warrior had been defeated — and even the cats heard it, so +no cat was ready to come. All the cats gathered. They elected a leader and said, "You go, +because it is not an ordinary mouse — the warrior has been defeated. We are ordinary +cats, and this is a great warrior. If he is defeated, where are we? So we will wait outside +and let you go in." + +The leader became afraid — leaders are always afraid. They are leaders because cowards +are there, and those cowards choose them. They are leaders of the cowards. If there were +no cowards, there would not be any leaders. Basically, they are chosen by cowards, so +they are leaders of cowards. + +The cat had to go, as every leader has to go — because the followers were pushing him. +Now that the leader was chosen, nothing could be done, the cat had to go. She entered, +afraid, trembling, nervous. The mouse was sitting on the bed. The cat had never seen +such a mouse: he was just sitting on the bed. She started thinking what to do, what +method to apply, and while she was thinking what to do, what method to apply, what +technique — about old experiences and memories, about what to do with this situation — +while she was thinking, the mouse suddenly attacked. + + + +The cat ran away, because this had never happened in the past! There is no mention in +history of a mouse attacking a cat. + +She came out and fell dead, so the warrior was advised by the neighborhood that "Now +ordinary cats won't do. You go to the palace, bring the king's cat. Only a royal cat can do +something. This is not an ordinary case." So the warrior had to go to the king and ask for +the cat. The cat from the palace came. The warrior was very much afraid when the cat +was coming with him because that cat looked just very ordinary. He was afraid that this +was again going to be a failure, because the cat who had died was bigger, greater, a great +leader, and this ordinary cat...? It seemed that the king was just joking — this cat won't +do. But the warrior couldn’t say anything to the king. + +He came with that ordinary cat. The cat entered, killed the mouse and came out. All the +cats were waiting. They gathered around and they said, "What is the trick? Our leader has +died, the warrior has been defeated by the mouse, and you simply killed him. You came +out with the dead mouse." The cat said, "I am a cat and he is a mouse. There is no other +technique. I am a cat — that is enough. What is the use of any technique? Being a cat is +enough. When I entered, it was enough that a cat should enter. I am a cat." + +Really, this is a Zen story. If your mind were the master, there would be no need for +effort. + +Every effort is just to deceive yourself: you are not the cat, and you are fighting with the +mouse. Become a master! But how to become a master? Tantra says, understanding will +make you a master, nothing else. Understanding is the secret of all mastery. If you kn ow +it well, you are the master. If you do not know, you will go on fighting. Then you will +remain the slave, and the more you fight, the more you will be defeated. You are fighting +with a mouse. + +The second question: + +Question 2 + +ARE THERE NO HORRIBLE NOISES IF WE LISTEN FROM THE CENTER OF THE +BODY? WHAT ABOUT THE SCREECHING CITY NOISES THAT HAVE BEEN A +SOURCE OF IRRITATION TO US ALL OF OUR LIVES: CAN WE TURN THESE +INTO POSITIVE SOUND? + +This always remains a basic question: how to change something else, how to change +negative sounds into positive ones. You cannot! If you are positive, then nothing is +negative for you. If you are negative, then everything will be negative for you. You are +the source of all that exists around you; you are the creator of your own world. And we +are not living in one world, remember. There are as many worlds as there are minds. + +Each mind is living in its own world; it creates the world. + +So if everything looks negative and everything looks destructive and everything looks +inimical, against you, it is because you do not have the positive center in you. So do not +think about how to change negative noises. + +If you feel negativity all around you, it simply shows you are negative within. The world +is just a mirror, and you are reflected in it. + +I was staying in a village rest house. It was a very poor village, but it was filled with +many dogs. They all gathered in the night around the rest house; it must have been their +usual habit. The rest house was a good place — big trees, shadows, and they must have +been resting there every night. So I was staying there, and one minister of a particular +state was staying there. The minister became very much disturbed because the dogs were + + + +barking, creating much nuisance. Half the night passed and the minister couldn’t sleep, so +he came to me. + +He said, "Are you asleep?" I was fast asleep, so he came near to me, made me wake up +and asked me, "Please tell me how you could fall into sleep amid such noises all around. +At least twenty to thirty dogs are there, and they are fighting and barking and doing +everything that dogs ordinarily do. So what to do? I cannot sleep, and I am so tired after +the whole day's journey. If I cannot sleep, it will be difficult for me. The next day I have +to go again on a tour, and I will leave early in the morning. Sleep doesn't seem to come, +and I have tried all the methods I have learned and heard about — chanting a mantra, +praying to God, etc. I have done everything, but nothing happens, so what to do now?" + +So I told him, "Those dogs are not gathered here for you or to disturb you. + +They are not even aware that a minister is staying here; they do not read newspapers. +They are completely ignorant. They are not here purposefully, they are not concerned +with you. They are doing their work. Why are you getting disturbed?" + +So he said, "Why should I not? How not to? With so much barking, how can I go into +sleep?" + +So I told him, "Do not fight with the barking. You are fighting — that is the problem, not +the noise. The noise is not disturbing you, you are disturbing yourself because of the +noise. You are against the noise, so you have a condition. You are saying, 'If the dogs +stop barking, then I will sleep.’ The dogs won't listen to you. You have a condition. You +feel that if the condition is fulfilled, then you can sleep. This condition is disturbing you. +Accept dogs! Do not make a condition that 'If they stop barking, then I will sleep.' Just +accept. + +"Dogs are there and they are barking; do not resist, do not fight, do not try to forget those +noises. Accept them and listen to them, they are beautiful. The night is so silent, and they +are barking so vitally — just listen. This will be the mantra, the right mantra: just listen to +them." + +So he said, "Okay! I do not believe that this will help, but as there is nothing else to do, I +will try." He fell asleep, and the dogs were still barking. In the morning he said, "This is +miraculous. I accepted them; I withdrew my condition. I listened. Those dogs became +very musical, and their barking, their noise, was not disturbing. Rather, it became a sort +of lullaby, and I fell into deep sleep because of it." + +It depends on your mind. If you are positive, then everything becomes positive. If you are +negative, then everything turns negative, everything turns sour. So please remember this - +not only about noises, but about everything in life. If you feel that something negative +exists around you, go and find the cause within. It is you. You must be expecting +something, you must be desiring something, you must be making some conditions. +Existence cannot be forced to go according to you; it flows in its own way. If you can +flow with it, you will be positive. If you fight with it, you will become negative and the +whole cosmos around you will turn negative. + +It is just like a person who is trying to float upstream: then the stream is negative. If you +are trying to float upstream in a river, then the river will seem negative and you will feel +that the river is fighting you, that the river is pushing you downwards. The river is trying +to move you downstream, not upstream, so it will seem as if the river is fighting you. The +river is completely unaware of you, blissfully unaware. And it is good; otherwise the +river will have to go into a madhouse. The river is not fighting with you, you are fighting + + + +with the river. + + +You are trying to float upstream. + +I will tell you one anecdote... A great crowd gathered around Mulla Nasrudin's house, +and they said, "What are you doing? Your wife has fallen into the stream and the river is +in a flood. Go immediately; otherwise the stream will take your wife to the sea." The sea +was just near. So Mulla came running to the bank, jumped into the stream, and started +swimming upstream to find where his wife was. + +The crowd screamed, "What are you doing, Nasrudin? Your wife couldn’t have gone +upstream. She has gone downstream." Mulla said, "Do not disturb me. I know my wife +very well. If anyone else had fallen into the stream, he would have gone downstream. Not +my wife, however. She must have gone upstream. I know my wife well, I have lived with +her for forty years." + +The mind is always trying to go upstream, to move upstream. Fighting with everything, +you create a negative world around you. Obviously, this has to happen. The world is not +against you, but because you are not with the world, you feel it is against you. Float +downstream, and then the river will help you to float. Then your energy will not be +needed. The river will become a boat, it will take you. You will not lose any energy by +floating downstream, because once you float downstream you have accepted the river, +the current, the flow, the direction — everything. Then you have become positive to it. + +When you are positive, the river is positive to you. + +You can make everything positive only by making yourself positive toward life. But we +are not positive toward life. Why? Why are we not positive toward life? Why are we +negative? Why this constant struggle? Why can we not have a total let-go with life? What +is the fear? + +You may not have observed: you are afraid of life — very much afraid of life. It may +sound odd to say that you are afraid of life, because ordinarily you feel that you are afraid +of death, not of life. This is the usual observation, that everyone is afraid of death. But I +tell you, you are afraid of death only because you are afraid of life. One who is not afraid +of life will not be afraid of death. + +Why are we afraid of life? Three reasons. Firstly, your ego can exist only if it goes +upstream. Floating downstream, your ego cannot exist. Your ego can exist only when it +fights, when it says no! If it says yes, always yes, it cannot exist. The ego is the basic +cause of saying no to everything. + +Look at your ways, at how you behave and react. Look at how the no comes immediately +to the mind, and how yes is very, very difficult — because with no you exist as an ego. +With yes your identity is lost, you become a drop in the ocean. Yes has no ego in it; that +is why it is so difficult to say yes — very difficult. + +You understand me? If you are going upstream, you feel YOU are. + +If you just let go and you start floating with the stream wheresoever it leads, you do not +feel that you are. Then you have become part of the stream. This ego, this thinking +yourself to be isolated as an "I", creates the negativity around you. This ego creates the +ripples of negativity. + +Secondly, life is unknown, unpredictable, and your mind is very narrow: it wants to live +in the known, in the predictable. Mind is always afraid of the unknown. There is a +reason: it is because mind consists of the known. Whatsoever you have known, + + + +experienced, learned, mind consists of that. The unknown is not part of the mind. The +mind is always afraid of the unknown, the unknown will disturb the mind, so the mind is +closed for the unknown. It lives in its routine, it lives in a pattern. It moves in particular +grooves, known grooves. It goes on moving, moving, just like a gramophone record. It is +afraid to move into the unknown. + +Life is always moving into the unknown, and you are afraid. You want life to go +according to your mind, according to the known, but life cannot follow you. It always +moves into the unknown. That is why we are afraid of life, and whenever we get any +chance we try to kill life, we try to fix it. Life is a flux. We try to fix it because with the +fixed, prediction is possible. + +If I love someone, immediately my mind will start working on how to marry them, +because marriage fixes things. + +Love is a flux, love cannot be predicted. No one knows where it will lead, or whether it +will lead anywhere. No one knows! It is floating with the stream, and you do not know +where the stream is going. It may not be there the next day, the next moment. + +You cannot be certain of the next moment. But the mind wants certainty, and life is +insecurity. Because the mind wants certainty, the mind is against love. The mind is for +marriage because marriage is a fixed thing. Now you have fixed things, so now the flux is +broken. Now the water is not flowing — it has become ice. Now you have something +dead; you can predict. Only dead things are predictable. The more something is alive, the +more it is unpredictable. No one knows where life will move. + +So we do not want life, we want dead things. That is why we go on possessing things. It +is difficult to live with a person; it is easy to live with things. So we go on possessing +things and things and things. It is difficult to live with a person. And if we have to live +with a person, we will try to make a thing out of that person, we cannot allow the person. +A wife is a thing, a husband is a thing. They are not persons, they are fixed things. When +the husband comes to the house, he knows that the wife will be there, waiting. He knows, +he can predict. If he feels like loving, he can love — the wife will be available. + +The wife has become a thing. The wife cannot say, "No, today I am not in the mood to +love." Wives are not supposed to say such things. Not in the mood? They are not +supposed to have moods. They are fixed institutions — institutes. You can rely on the +institute; you cannot rely on life. Thus, we turn persons into things. + +Look at any relationship. In the beginning it is a relationship of "I" and "thou", but sooner +or later it becomes a relationship of "I" and "it". The "thou" disappears, and then we go +on expecting things. We say, "Do this. This is the duty of a wife and that is the duty of a +husband. Do this!" You will have to do it. It is a duty; it has to be done mechanically. + +You cannot say, "I cannot do it." + +This fixedness is a fear of life. Life is a flux; nothing can be said about life. I love you +this moment, but the next moment the love may disappear. The moment before it was not +there; this moment it is there. And it is not because of me that it is there, it just happened. +I couldn’t have forced it to be here. It just happened, and that which has happened can +unhappen at any moment, you cannot do anything. The next moment it may disappear; +there is no certainty for the next moment. + +But the mind wants certainty, so it turns love into marriage. The living thing becomes +dead. Then you can possess it; then you can rely on it. The next day also there will be +love. + + + +This is the absurdity of the whole thing: you have killed the thing in order to possess it, +and then you can never enjoy it because it is no more, it is dead. + +In order that you could possess the wife, she has been killed. The beloved has become a +wife, and now you expect that the wife should behave like the beloved. That is absurd, +the wife cannot behave like the beloved. The beloved was alive, the wife is dead. The +beloved was a happening, the wife is an institution. And when the wife is not behaving +like the beloved, then you go on saying, "Don't you love me? You loved me before." But +this is not the same person. This is not even a person: this is a thing. First you killed her +to possess her, and now you want aliveness out of her. Then the whole misery is created. +We are afraid of life because life is a flux. The mind wants certainty. If you really want to +be alive, be ready to be insecure. There is no security and there is no way to create +security! There is only one way, do not live; then you will be secure. So those who are +dead, they are absolutely secure. An alive person is insecure. Insecurity is the very +central core of life, but the mind wants security. + +Thirdly, in life, in existence, there is a basic duality. Existence exists as duality, and the +mind wants to choose one part and deny the other. For example, you want to be happy, +you want pleasure; you do not want pain. + +But the pain is part of pleasure, the other aspect of it. The coin is one. On one side is +pleasure, on another side is pain. You want pleasure, but you do not know that the more +you want pleasure, the more pain will follow; and the more you become sensitive to +pleasure, the more you become sensitive to pain also. + +So a person who wants pleasure should be ready to accept pain. This is just like valleys +and hills. You want peaks, hills, but you do not want valleys — so where will the valleys +go? And without the valleys, how can there be peaks? Without valleys there can be no +peaks. If you love peaks, love valleys also. They become part of the destiny. + +The mind wants one thing and it denies the other, and the other is part of it. The mind +says, "Life is good, death is bad." But death is one part, — the valley part, — and life is the +peak part. Life cannot exist without death. Life exists BECAUSE of death. If death +disappeared, life would disappear, but the mind says, "I want only life, I do not want +death." Then the mind moves in a dream world which exists nowhere, and it starts +fighting with everything, because in life everything is related to the opposite. If you do +not want the opposite, a fight starts. + +A person who understands this — that life is duality — accepts both. He accepts death, not +as against life, but as part of it, as the valley part. + +He accepts night as the valley part of the day. One moment you feel blissful; the next +moment you are sad. Y ou do not want to accept the next moment — that is the valley part. +And the higher the peak of bliss, the deeper will be the valley, because deeper valleys are +only created by higher peaks. So the higher you move, the lower you will be falling. And +this is just like waves rising high: then there is a valley part. + +Understanding means being aware of this fact — not only being aware, but having a deep +acceptance of the fact, because you cannot move away from the fact. Y ou can create a +fiction... and we have been creating fictions for centuries. We have put hell somewhere +deep down and heaven high up somewhere. We have created an absolute division +between them, which is nonsense, because hell is the valley part of heaven. It exists with +heaven; it cannot exist apart. + +This understanding will help you to be positive; then you will be able to accept + + + +everything. By positive I mean that you accept everything because you know that you +cannot divide existence. + +I take a breath in, and immediately I have to throw it out. I inhale and then exhale. If I +were only to inhale and not to exhale, I would die; or if I were only to exhale and not to +inhale, then too I would die, because inhaling and exhaling are part of one process, a +circle. I can inhale only because I exhale. + +Both are together and they cannot be divided. + +This is what a liberated man is — undivided. It happens if this understanding comes to +him. I call a man liberated, enlightened, who accepts the very duality of existence. + +Then he is positive. + +Then whatsoever happens is accepted. + +Then he has no expectations. + +Then he makes no demands on existence. + +Then he can float downstream. + +THE END. + + + +Chapter 27: Soundlessness, soundfulness and total awareness + + +15. INTONE A SOUND, AS AUM, SLOWLY. AS SOUND ENTERS +SOUNDFULNESS, SO DO YOU. + +16. IN THE BEGINNING AND GRADUAL REFINEMENT OF THE SOUND OF ANY +LETTER, AWAKE. + +17. WHILE LISTENING TO STRINGED INSTRUMENTS, HEAR THEIR +COMPOSITE CENTRAL SOUND; THUS OMNIPRESENCE. + +I wonder whether or not you have heard about the concept of anti-matter. A new concept +has entered recently in the world of physics — the concept of anti-matter. It has been felt +always that nothing can exist in the universe without its opposite. It is impossible to +conceive of anything which exists alone without its opposite. The diametrically opposite +must be there whether known or not. + +The shadow cannot exist without light, life cannot exist without death, morning cannot +exist without night, man cannot exist without woman — or the same with anything you +can think of. + +The diametrically opposite pole is inevitably needed. This was always proposed in +philosophy, but now this is a proposition of physics. And very absurd notions have +developed because of this concept. Time moves from the past to the future, but now +physicists say that if time moves from the past to the future, there must be somewhere the +opposite time process, which moves from the future to the past; otherwise this time +process cannot be — but it is. The opposite, the diametrically opposite must be there +somewhere — anti-time. + +Moving from the future to the past? It looks very absurd. How can something move from +the future to the past? + +They also say that matter exists, so anti-matter must be existing somewhere. What will be +the anti-matter? Matter is density. Suppose a stone is here in my hand. What is that +stone? Around it is space and in the space there is a density of matter. That density is +matter. What will be the anti-matter? They say anti-matter will be just a hole in space. +Density is matter, and there is also a hole in space with nothing in it. A space will be +around it, but it will be just a hole of nothingness. They say anti-matter must exist to +balance matter. Why am I talking on this? Because these sutras which are to follow are +based on this "anti"phenomenon. + +Sound exists, but tantra says sound can exist only because of silence; otherwise sound +will be impossible. Silence is anti-sound. So wherever there is sound, just behind it there +is silence. It cannot exist without silence; it is the other aspect of the same coin. So I utter +a word; for example, Aum. The more I utter it, just side by side, just behind it is the anti- +phenomenon, soundlessness. So if you can use sounds as a technique to enter +soundlessness, you will enter meditation. If you can use a word to go beyond words, you +will move into meditation. Look at it in this way: mind is the word; meditation is no- +mind. + +Mind is filled with sound and words and thought. Just by the corner is the other extreme +— no-mind. + +Zen masters have called meditation the state of no-mind. What is mind? If you analyze it, + + + +it is a process of thought. Or if you analyze it in terms of physics, then it is a process of +sounds. This sound process is mind, then just near it the no-mind exists. And you cannot +move into the no-mind without using the mind as the jumping board, because you cannot +even conceive of what no-mind is without understanding what mind is. Mind has to be +used as a jumping board, and from that jumping board you can have a plunge into the no- +mind. + +There have been two opposing schools. One school is there — it is known as "Sankya." +Sankya says mind has not to be used, because if you use mind you cannot go beyond it. +The same is the teaching of J. Krishnamurti; he is a Sankyaite. You cannot use mind. If +you use mind you cannot go beyond it, because the very use of the mind will strengthen +it, will make it more powerful. When you use it, you will be in its clutches. Using it, you +cannot go beyond it. So don’t use mind. That is why Krishnamurti is against all +techniques of meditation: because any technique is bound to use mind as a base. Mind +has to be used if you are going to use a technique. Any technique is bound to be a sort of +conditioning — or a reconditioning, or an unconditioning, or whatsoever name you give +to it, but it is going to be with the mind. + + +Sankya philosophy says that mind cannot be used: just understand this and take a jump. +But yoga says this is impossible. Even this understanding is to be done by mind. Even +with this understanding — that you cannot use mind, that no technique will be of help, +that every technique will become a hindrance and whatsoever you do will create a new +conditioning — you will still be using mind, you will move within mind. This too has to +be understood by mind. + +So yoga says there is no way in which mind is not used; mind will have to be used. It +should not be used positively, it should be used negatively. It should not be used in such +a way that it is strengthened, it should be used in such a way that it is weakened. And +techniques are the ways to use the mind in such a way that you use it to jump beyond it. +You use it just to go beyond it — as a jumping board. + +If mind can be used as a jumping board — and yoga and tantra believe that it can — then +something which belongs to mind has to be trained. Sound is one of the basic things, you +can use sound to go into soundlessness. + +The third technique on sound: + +INTONE A SOUND, AS AUM, SLOWLY. AS SOUND ENTERS SOUNDFULNESS, +SO DO YOU. + +INTONE A SOUND, AS AUM, SLOWLY. For example, take Aum This is one of the +basic sounds. A-U-M: these three sounds are combined in it. A-U-M are three basic +sounds. + +All sounds are made of them or derived from them; all sounds are combinations of these +three sounds. So these three are basic. They are as basic as in physics the electron, +neutron and proton are basic. This has to be deeply understood. + +Gurdjieff speaks of "The Law Of The Three". He says existence in the absolute sense is +one. In the absolute sense, in the ultimate sense, there is only one. But that is absolute, +and whatsoever we see is relative. Whatsoever we see is never absolute; the absolute is +always hidden. It cannot be seen, because the moment we see something, it is divided. It +is divided in three: the seer, the seen, and the relationship. I am seeing you: I am here, + + + +you are there, and between the two there is the relationship of knowledge, of seeing, of +vision, of cognition. The process is divided into three. The absolute is divided into three; +the moment it is known it becomes three. Unknown, it remains one. Known, it becomes +three. The known is relative; the unknown is absolute. + +So even our talk about the absolute is not absolute, because the moment we say "the +absolute," it has become known. Whatsoever we know, even the word 'absolute’ is +relative. That is why Lao Tsu insists so much that truth cannot be said. The moment you +say it, it has become untrue because it has become relative. So whatsoever word we use — +the truth, the absolute, PARA-BRAHMA, Tao — whatsoever word we use, the moment +we use it, it has become relative and it has become untrue. + +The one has become divided into three. + +So Gurdjieff says that "The Law Of The Three" is basic for the universe that we know. +And if we go deep we will find, we are bound to find, that everything will be reduced to +three. This is "The Law Of The Three". Christians have called it the trinity — God the +father, Jesus the son, and the Holy Ghost. Indians have called it TRIMURTI: the three +faces of Brahma, Vishnu, Mahesh or Shiva. Now physics says that if we move, if we go +on moving through analysis to the very base, then matter will be reduced to three: the +electron, neutron and proton. + +Poets have said that if we go deep in search for human aesthetic feeling, emotion, then +there is SATYAM, SHIVAM, SUNDARAM — the true, the good and the beautiful. +Human feeling is based on these three. Mystics have said that if we analyze ecstasy, +SAMADHI, then there is SAT-CHIT-ANANDA — existence, consciousness and bliss. +The whole human consciousness, in whatsoever dimension it works, comes to "The Law +Of The Three". 'Aum’ is a symbol of The "Law Of The Three". A-U-M: these three are +basic sounds. The atomic sounds, you can call them. These three sounds have been +combined in Aum, so Aum is just near the absolute, just behind it is the absolute, the +unknown. And Aum is the last station as far as sounds are concerned. If you move +beyond Aum, you move beyond sound; then there is no sound. + +A-U-M: these three are the last, they are the boundary of existence. Beyond these three +you move into the unknown, into the absolute. + +Physicists say that now we have come to the electron, it seems we have come to the limit, +to the very limit, because the electron cannot be said to be matter. Electrons are not +visible; they have no material property. And they cannot be called non-matter either +because all matter consists of them, is constituted of them. If they are neither matter nor +non-matter, what to call them? No one has seen electrons, they are just inferred; it is +mathematically assumed that they are there. Their effects are known, but they have not +been seen. Now we cannot move beyond them. The "Law Of The Three" is the limit, and +if you move beyond "The Law Of The Three" you move into the unknown. Nothing can +be said then. Even about electrons very little can be said. + +Aum is the limit as far as sound is concerned, you cannot move beyond. That is why +Aum has been used so much, in India, and all over the world. The Christian- +Mohammedan ’Amen’ is nothing but Aum in a different form; the same basic notes are +there. The English words ’omnipresent’, ’omnipotent’, ’omniscient’ contain it: the prefix +’omni’ is a derivation of Aum. So ’omnipresent’ refers to that which is present in the +whole of the Aum, in the whole of existence. ’Omnipotent’ means that which is absolutely +potent. + + + +’Omniscient’ means that which has seen the Aum, the whole, "The Law Of The Three". +The whole universe comes under it. + +Christians, Mohammedans, have been using after their prayers ’Amen’. But Hindus have +made a complete science out of it — the science of sound and the science of how to +transcend sound. And if mind is sound, then no-mind must be soundlessness, or — and +both mean the same — soundfulness. + +This has to be understood. The absolute can be described in either of two ways — +negative or positive. The relative has to be described in both the ways — negative and +positive: it is a duality. When you try to express the absolute, you can use either positive +tenns or negative terms, because human languages have two types of tenns — negative +and positive. When you are going to describe the absolute, the indescribable, you have to +use some tenns symbolically. So it depends on the mind. + +For example, Buddha liked to use negative terms. He would say soundlessness; he would +never say soundfulness. 'Soundfulness' is a positive term. Buddha would say +soundlessness, but tantra uses positive terms. The whole thinking of tantra is positive. +That is why the tenn used here is 'soundfulness': ENTER SOUNDFULNESS. Buddha +describes his absolute in negative terms: SHUNYA, nothingness. The Upanishads +describe the same absolute as the BRAHMAN — absoluteness. Buddha will use +nothingness and the Upanishads will use absoluteness, but both mean the same thing. + + +When words lose meaning you can use either the negative or the positive, because all +words are either negative or positive; you just have to choose one. You can say for a +liberated soul that he has become the whole. This is a positive way of saying it. Or you +can say he is no more — he has become nothingness. This is a negative way of saying it. +For example, if a small drop of water meets the ocean, you can say that the drop has +become nothingness, the drop has lost its individuality, the drop is no more. This is a +Buddhist way of saying things. It is good, it is right as far as it goes, because no word +goes very far. So as far as it goes, it is good. The drop is no more" that is what is meant +by NIRVANA. The drop has become non-being, it is not. Or you can use Upanishadic +tenns. The Upanishads will say that the drop has become the ocean. They are also right, +because when the boundaries are broken, the drop has become the ocean. + +So these are simply attitudes. Buddha likes negative terms, because the moment you say +anything positive it becomes limited, it looks limited. When you say that the drop has +become the ocean, Buddha will say that the ocean is also finite. The drop remains the +drop; it has become a little bigger, that is all. Howsoever bigger makes no difference. +Buddha will say that it has become a little bigger, but it remains. The finite has not +become infinite. + +The finite remains finite, so what is the difference? A small drop and a big drop... for +Buddha, that is the only difference between 'ocean' and 'drop' — and it is right, +mathematically it is so. + +So Buddha says that if the drop has become the ocean, then nothing has happened. If you +have become a god, then nothing has happened, you have only become a bigger man. If +you have become the BRAHMAN nothing has happened, you are still finite. So Buddha +says that you have to become nothing, you have to become SHUNYA — empty of all +boundaries and attributes, empty of everything that you can conceive of, just emptiness. +But Upanishadic thinkers will say that even if you are empty YOU ARE. If you have + + + +become emptiness YOU are still there, because emptiness exists, emptiness is. +Nothingness is also a way of being, a way of existence. So they say, why belabor the +point and why unnecessarily use negative terms? It is good to be positive. + +It is your choice, but tantra almost always uses positive terms. The very philosophy of +tantra is positive. It says, do not allow no, do not allow the negation. Tantrics are the +greatest of yea-sayers. They have said yes to everything, so they use positive tenns. The +sutra says, INTONE A SOUND, AS AUM, SLOWLY. AS SOUND ENTERS +SOUNDFULNESS, SO DO YOU... + +INTONE A SOUND, AS AUM, SLOWLY. The intoning of a sound is a very subtle +science. + +First you have to intone it loudly, outwardly; then others can hear it. And it is good to +start loudly. Why? Because you can also hear it clearly when you intone it loudly; +because whatsoever you say it is to others, and this has become a habit. Whenever you +are talking you are talking to others, and you hear yourself talk only when you are talking +to others. So start from the natural habit. + +Intone the sound Aum, then by and by, feel attunement with the sound. When you intone +the sound Aum, be filled with it, forget everything else. Become the Aum, become the +sound. And it is very easy to become the sound, because sound can vibrate through your +body, through your mind, through your whole nervous system. Feel the reverberation of +Aum. Intone it, and feel it as if your whole body is being filled with it, every cell is +vibrating with it. + +Intoning is also "in-tuning." Tune yourself with the sound, become the sound. And then, +as you feel a deep hannony between you and the sound, and you develop a deep affection +for it — and the sound is so beautiful and so musical: Aum — then the more you intone it, +the more you will feel yourself filled with a subtle sweetness. There are sounds which are +bitter, there are sounds which are very hard. Aum is a very sweet sound, the purest. + +Intone it and be filled with it. + +And when you begin to feel hannonious with it, you can drop intoning loudly. + +Then close your lips and intone it inwardly, but inwardly also first try it loudly. Intone +inwardly, but loudly, so that the sound spreads all over your body, touches every part, +every cell of your body. You will feel vitalized by it, you will feel rejuvenated, you will +feel a new life entering you — because your body is a musical instrument. It needs +hannony, and when the harmony is disturbed you are disturbed. + +That is why when you hear music you feel good. Why do you feel good? What is music, +but just some harmonious sounds? Why do you feel such a well-being when there is +music around you? And when there is chaos, noise, why do you feel so disturbed? You +yourself are deeply musical. You are an instrument, and that instrument re-echoes things. +Intone Aum inside, and you will feel that your whole body dances with it. Y ou will feel +that your whole body is undergoing a cleansing bath; every pore is being cleansed. But as +you feel it more intensely, and as it penetrates you more, go on becoming more and more +slow, because the slower the sound, the deeper it can go. It is just like homeopathy. The +smaller the dose, the deeper it penetrates — because if you want to go deeper, you have to +go more subtly, more subtly, more subtly... + +Crude, coarse sounds cannot enter your heart. They can enter your ears, but they cannot +enter your heart. The passage is very narrow, and the heart is so delicate that only very +slow, very rhythmic, very atomic sounds are allowed to enter it. + + + +And unless a sound enters your heart, the mantra is not complete. The mantra is complete +only when the sound enters your heart — the deepest, most central core of your being. +Then go on being more slow, more slow, more slow. + +And there are also other reasons for making these sounds slower and more subtle: the +more subtle a sound is, the more intense an awareness you will need to feel it inside. The +more coarse the sound, the less need there is of any awareness. A coarse sound will hit +you, you will become aware of it; but then it is violent. + +If a sound is musical, hannonious, subtle, then you will have to listen to it inside and you +will have to be very alert to listen to it. If you are not alert, you will go to sleep and miss +the whole point. That is the problem with a mantra, with any chanting, with any use of +sound: it can create sleep. It is a subtle tranquilizer. If you continuously repeat any sound +without being alert about it, you will fall asleep, because then the repetition becomes +mechanical. "Aum, Aum, Aum..." becomes mechanical, and then repetition creates +boredom. + +Boredom is a basic necessity for sleep. You cannot get to sleep unless you are bored. If +you are excited, you cannot get to sleep. That is why the modem man is becoming +incapable of going to sleep. What is the reason? There is so much excitement. It was +never like this before. + +In the old, past world life was a deep boredom, a repetitious boredom. + +If you go to a village hidden somewhere in the hills, there life is a boredom. It may not +look to you like a boredom because you have not lived there, and on a holiday you may +feel very much excited. But that excitement is because of Bombay, not because of those +hills. Those hills are completely boring. Those who are living there are bored and asleep. +There is only the same thing, the same routine with no excitement, with no change, and +nothing ever happens. There is no news. Things go on as they have always, they go on +repeating in a circular way. As seasons repeat, as nature repeats, as day and night move +in a circle, everything moves in a village, in an old village, in a circle. That is why +villagers can fall to sleep so easily: everything is just boring. + +Modern life has become so exciting — nothing repeats. Everything goes on becoming +new, changing. Life has become unpredictable, and you are so excited you cannot fall +asleep. Every day you can see a new film, every day you can hear a new speech, every +day you can read a new book, every day something new is possible. + +This constant excitement continues. When you go to your bed, the excitement is there. +The mind wants to be awake; it seems futile to fall asleep. There are thinkers who are +saying that this is pure wastage — if you live for sixty years, twenty years are wasted in +sleep. Sheer wastage! Life is so much excitement, why waste any of it? But in the old +world, in the old days, life was not an excitement. + +It was a circular movement of the same repetition. If anything excites you, it means it is +new. + +If you repeat a particular sound, it creates a circle within you. It creates boredom; it +creates sleep. That is why Mahesh Yogi's transcendental meditation is known in the West +as a non-medical tranquilizer. It is because it is a simple repetition of a mantra. But if +your mantra becomes just a repetition without an alert YOU inside, an alert YOU +constantly listening to you, listening to the sound, it may help sleep, but it cannot help +anything else. As far as it goes, it is good. If you are suffering from insomnia, +transcendental meditation is good. + + + +Otherwise, it helps — but not unless you use the mantra with an alert inner ear. Then you +have to do two things: go on reducing the pitch of the mantra, reducing the sound, +making it more slow and more subtle, and at the same time simultaneously go on +becoming more alert, more alert. As the sound becomes subtle, become more alert; +otherwise, you will miss the whole point. + +So two things have to be done: sound has to be slowed down, and you have to become +more alert. The more sound becomes subtle, the more alert you are. To make you more +alert the sound has to be made more subtle, and a point comes when sound enters +soundlessness, or soundfulness, and you enter total awareness. When the sound enters +soundlessness or soundfulness, by that time your alertness must have touched the peak. + +When the sound reaches the valley, when it goes to the down-most, deepest center in the +valley, your alertness has gone to the very peak, to the Everest. And there, sound +dissolves into soundfulness or soundlessness, and you dissolve into total awareness. + +This is the method: INTONE A SOUND, AS AUM, SLOWLY. AS SOUND ENTERS +SOUNDFULNESS, SO DO YOU. And wait for the moment when the sound has become +so subtle, so atomic, that now, any moment, it will take a jump from the world of the +laws, the world of the three, and it will enter the world of the one, the absolute. Wait! + +This is one of the most beautiful experiences possible to man — when sound dissolves. +Then suddenly you cannot find where the sound has gone. + +You were hearing it subtly, deep down: "Aum, Aum, Aum..." and then it is no more +there. You have entered the world of the one. The world of the three is no more. This, +tantra says, is soundfulness; Buddha says soundlessness. + +This is a way — one of the most used, one of the most helpful. Mantra became so +important because of this. Because sound is already there and your mind is so filled with +it, you can use it as a jumping board. But there are difficulties, and the first difficulty is +sleep. Whosoever uses a mantra must be aware of this difficulty. That is the hindrance — +sleep. You are bound to fall into sleep because it is so repetitious, it is so harmonious, it +is so boring — you will fall victim. + +And do not think that your sleep is your meditation. Sleep is not meditation. + +Sleep is good in itself, but beware. If you are using the mantra for sleep, then it is okay. +But if you are using the mantra for spiritual awakening, then beware of sleep. For those +who use a mantra, sleep is the enemy — and it so easily happens. And it is so beautiful, +because it is a different type of a sleep: remember that too. When it comes from a mantra, +this is not ordinary sleep. This is a different kind of sleep. + +The Greeks have called it HYPNOS, and from hypnos the word hypnotism has been +derived. In yoga, they call it YOGA TANDRA — a particular sleep which happens to the +yogi and not to the ordinary man. It is hypnos — an induced sleep, not an ordinary sleep. +And the difference is very basic, so try to understand it — because if you try a mantra, any +sound, this is going to be your problem. The greatest problem to face is sleep. + +Hypnosis uses the same technique — creating boredom. The hypnotist goes on repeating a +certain word or certain sentences. He is continuously repeating, and you become bored. +Or he gives you a light to concentrate on. Seeing a light continuously, you get bored. + +In many temples, churches, people are fast asleep. Listening to scriptures, they fall +asleep. They have heard those scriptures so many times, it has become a boredom. There +is no excitement, they already know the story. + + + +If you go on seeing the same film again and again, you will be fast asleep: no excitement +for the mind, no challenge, and there is nothing to see. You have heard the RAMAYANA +so many times, you can be asleep and without any difficulty you can go on hearing in +your sleep. And you will never feel that you were asleep because you will never miss +anything in the story: you know it already. + +Preachers' voices are very deeply sleep- inducing, monotonous. You can talk +monotonously, in the same pitch, then sleep happens. Many psychologists advise their +patients with insomnia to go and hear a religious talk, that gives sleep easily. Whenever +you are bored, you will fall asleep, but that sleep is hypnosis, that sleep is yoga tandra. +And what is the difference? That is not natural. It is unnatural, and with particular +attributes. + +One, when you fall asleep through a mantra or through hypnosis, you can create any +illusion easily and the illusion will be as real as possible. In ordinary sleep you can create +dreams, but the moment you are awake you will know that they were dreams. In +hypnosis, in yoga tandra, you can create visions, and when you will be out of it you will +not be able to say that they were dreams. You will say that they were more real than the +life around you. That is one of the basic differences. + +You can create any illusion. So if a Christian falls into hypnosis, he will see Christ. + +If a Hindu falls, he will see Krishna playing on his flute. It is beautiful! And the quality +of hypnosis is that you will believe that this is real. That is the danger, and no one can +convince you that this is unreal. The feeling is such that you KNOW this is real. You can +say that the whole life is unreal, MAYA, illusion, but you cannot say that whatsoever you +have seen in hypnosis, in yoga tandra, is unreal. It is so alive, so colorful, so attractive +and magnetizing. + +That is why if someone says something to you while you are hypnotized, you will believe +him absolutely. There can be no doubt; you cannot doubt him. You may have seen some +hypnotic sessions. Whatsoever the hypnotist says, the hypnotized person believes and +starts acting out. If he says to a man, "You are a woman. Now walk on the stage," the +man will walk like a woman. He cannot walk like a man because hypnosis is deep trust; it +is faith. There is no conscious mind to think, no reasoning mind to argue. You are simply +the heart, you simply believe. There is no way not to believe, you cannot question. The +questioning mind is asleep — that is the difference. + +In your ordinary sleep, the questioning mind is present, it is not asleep. In hypnosis your +questioning mind is asleep, and you are not asleep. That is why you can hear the +hypnotist say anything to you and you will follow his instructions. In ordinary sleep you +cannot hear, but your reasoning is not asleep. + +So if something happens which can be fatal to you, your sleep will be broken by your +reason. + +A mother is sleeping with her child. She may not hear anything else, but if the child gives +even a very small sound, a small signal, she will be awake. If a child feels a little uneasy, +she will be awake. The reasoning mind is alert. You are asleep, but your reasoning mind +is alert. So even sometimes in dreams, you can feel that they are dreams. Of course, the +moment you feel this your dream will be broken. You can feel that it is absurd, but the +moment you feel it the dream will be broken. Your mind is alert, a part is constantly +watching. + + + +But in hypnosis, or in yoga tandra, the watcher is asleep. That is the problem with all +those who want to use sound to go into soundlessness or soundfulness, to go beyond. + +They must be aware that the mantra should not become an auto-hypnotic technique. It +must not create auto-hypnosis. + +So what can you do? You can do only one thing: while you are using your mantra, while +you are intoning your mantra, do not simply intone it. At the same time be alert and listen +to it also. Intone it and listen to it both. Otherwise, if you are not listening consciously, it +will become your lullaby and you will fall into deep sleep. That sleep will be very good — +you will feel refreshed after it, alive; you will feel a certain well-being — but this is not +the point. + + +The fourth technique on sound: + +IN THE BEGINNING AND GRADUAL REFINEMENT OF THE SOUND OF ANY +LETTER, AWAKE. + +Sometimes teachers have used this technique very much. They have their ingenious +ways. For example, if you enter a Zen master's hut, he may suddenly give a scream. You +will become startled, but if you know why he is doing this you know he is doing it just to +make you awake. Any sudden thing makes you awake. Any sudden sound can make you +awake. + +Suddenness breaks your sleep, and ordinarily we are asleep. Unless something goes +wrong, we are not out of sleep, we go on doing things sleepily. That is why we never feel +the sleep. You go to your office, you drive the car, you come back to your home, you +love your children, you talk to your wife, so you think you are not sleepy at all. How can +you do all of these things in a sleep? You think that isn’t possible, but do you know +anything about sleepwalkers — about those who walk in their sleep? Their eyes are open, +and they are asleep, and they can do many things. But they will not remember in the +morning that they have done them. + +They may go to the police station and report that something is wrong, that someone came +into their house at night and was creating mischief, and they themselves have been found +to be responsible. But in the night, in their sleep, they walk and do certain things, then +they come back into their beds and continue their sleep, and in the morning they cannot +remember what has happened. + +They can open doors, they can use keys, they can do many things. Their eyes are open, +and they are asleep. + +In a deeper sense, we are all sleepwalkers. You can go to your office, you can come to +your home, you can do certain things: you will repeat the same things you have always +repeated. You will tell your wife, "I love you," and you will not mean anything by it. The +words will be just mechanical. You are not even aware that you are telling your wife, "I +love you." You are simply doing things as if you are fast asleep. This whole world is a +world of sleepwalkers for a person who has become awakened. A Buddha feels that way, +a Gurdjieff feels that way — that everyone is fast asleep and still doing things. + +Gurdjieff used to say that whatsoever is happening in this world is absolutely what can be +expected — wars, fights, riots, murder, suicide. Someone asked Gurdjieff, "Can +something be done to stop wars?" He said, "Nothing can be done — because those who +are fighting, they are fast asleep, and those who are pacifists, they are fast asleep. And + + + +everyone is going on in a sleep. These happenings are natural, inevitable. Unless man is +awake, nothing can be changed, because these are all just by-products of his sleep. He +will fight; he cannot be stopped from fighting. Only the causes can be changed." + +Once he was fighting for Christianity, for Islam, for this and that. + +Now he is not fighting for Christianity, now he is fighting for communism, for +democracy. Causes will change, excuses will change, and the fight will continue, because +man is asleep and you cannot expect anything else. + +This sleepiness can be broken. You have to use certain techniques. This technique says, +IN THE BEGINNING AND GRADUAL REFINEMENT OF THE SOUND OF ANY +LETTER, AWAKE. Try with any sound, with any letter — Aum, for example. In the +beginning, when you have not yet created the sound, AWAKE. Or when the sound moves +into soundlessness, then awake. + +How can you do it? Go to a temple. A bell is there or a gong. Take the bell in your hand +and wait. First become totally alert. The sound is going to be there and you are not to +miss the beginning. First become totally alert, as if your life depends on this, as if +someone is going to kill you this very moment, and you will be awake. Be alert — as if +this is going to be your death. And if there is thought, wait, because thought is sleepiness. +With thought you cannot be alert. When you are alert, there is no thought. So wait. When +you feel that now the mind is without thought, that there is no cloud and you are alert, +then move with the sound. + +Look when the sound is not there, then close your eyes. Then look when the sound is +created, struck; then move with the sound. The sound will become slower and slower, +subtler and subtler and subtler, and then it will not be there. + +Then go on with the sound. Be aware, alert. Move with the sound to the very end. See +both the poles of the sound, both the beginning and the end. + +Try it with some outer sound like a gong or a bell or anything, then close your eyes. Utter +any sound inside — Aum or anything — and then do the same experiment with it. It is +difficult; that is why we do it outwardly first. When you can do it outwardly, then you +will be able to do it inwardly. Then do it. Wait for the moment when the mind is vacant, +then create the sound inside. Feel it, move with it, go with it, until it disappears +completely. + +Until you can do this... it will take time. A few months will be needed, at least three +months. In these three months, you will become more and more alert. The pre-sound state +and the after-sound state have to be watched. Nothing is to be missed. Once you become +so alert that you can watch the beginning and the end of a sound, through this process +you will have become a totally different person. + +Sometimes this looks very absurd. Such simple techniques, how can they change you? +Everyone is so disturbed, in anguish, and these methods seem so simple. They seem like +tricks. If you go to Krishnamurti and tell him that this is the method, he will say, "This is +a mental trick. Do not be tricked by it. Forget it, throw it!" + +It looks so. Obviously, it looks like a trick. + +How can you be transfonned through such simple things? But you do not know — they +are not simple. When you do them, then you know that they are very arduous. If you just +hear me telling about them, they are simple. If I tell you, "This is poison and if you take +one drop of it you will die," if you do not know anything about poison you will say, + + + +"What are you talking about? Just a drop of this liquid, and a person like me who is +healthy, strong, will die?" If you do not know anything about poison, then only can you +say this. If you know something about it, you cannot say this. + +This seems to be very simple: intoning a sound and then becoming aware in the +beginning and in the end. But awareness is very difficult, and when you try it then you +will know that it is not child's play. You are not aware — and when you try it, for the first +time you will know that you have been asleep your whole life. Right now you think you +are already aware. Try this. With any small thing, try this. + +Tell yourself that "I will be awake, alert, for ten breaths," and then count the breaths. "For +ten breaths only," tell yourself, "I will remain alert. And I will count from one to ten, the +incoming breath, the outgoing, the incoming, the outgoing. I will remain alert." + +You will miss. Two or three, and you will have moved somewhere else. Then suddenly +you will become aware that "I have missed. + +I am not counting the breaths." Or you can count, but when you have counted to ten you +will become aware that "I was counting in my sleep. I was not alert." + +Alertness is one of the most difficult things. Do not think that the methods are simple. +Whatsoever the technique, alertness is the thing to be attained. All else is just a help. + +And you can devise your own methods. But remember only one thing: alertness must be +there. You can do anything in sleep; then there is no problem. The problem arises only +when it is a condition to do it alertly. + +The fifth sound technique: + +WHILE LISTENING TO STRINGED INSTRUMENTS, HEAR THEIR COMPOSITE +CENTRAL SOUND; THUS OMNIPRESENCE. + +The same! You are hearing an instrument — a sitar, or anything. Many notes are there. Be +alert and listen to the central core, the backbone of it around which all the notes are +flowing, the deepest current which holds all the notes together — that which is central, +just like your backbone. The whole body is held by the backbone. Listening to the music, +be alert, penetrate the music, and find the backbone of it — the central thing which goes +on flowing, holding everything together. Notes come and go and disappear, but the +central core flows on. Become aware of it. + +Basically, originally, music was used for meditation; particularly Indian music developed +as a method of meditation, Indian dancing developed as a method of meditation. + +For the doer it was a deep meditation, and for the audience also it was a deep meditation. +A dancer or a musician can be a technician. If there is no meditation in it, he is a +technician. He can be a great technician, but then the soul is not there, only the body. The +soul comes only when the musician is a deep meditator. + +And music is just the outward thing. While playing on his sitar, one is not only playing +on his sitar, he is also playing on his alertness inside. The sitar goes on outwardly and his +intense awareness moves inside. The music flows outwardly, but he is alert, constantly +aware of the innennost core of it. And that gives samadhi. That becomes ecstasy. That +becomes the highest peak. + +It is said that when the musician has really become the musician, he will break his +instrument — because it is of no use. If he still needs his instrument, he is not a real +musician yet. He is just learning. If you can play with music, with meditation, sooner or +later the inner music will become more important, and the outer will become not only + + + +less important: ultimately it will become a disturbance. If your consciousness moves +inside and can find the inner music, then the outer music will be a disturbance. You will +throw the sitar, you will throw the instrument away from you, because now you have +found the inner instrument. But it cannot be found without the outer; with the outer you +can become alert more easily. + +Once you have become alert, leave the outer and move inwards. And for the listener also, +the same! + +But what are you doing when you listen to music? You are not meditating. On the +contrary, you are using music as something like alcohol. You are using it to be relaxed, +you are using it for self-forgetfulness. This is the misfortune, the misery: the techniques +which were developed for awareness are being used for sleep. And this is how man goes +on doing mischief with himself. + +If something is given to you which can make you awake, you will use it to make yourself +more sleepy. That is why for millennia teachings were kept secret — because it was +thought to be useless to give techniques to a sleepy man. He will use them for sleep; he +cannot do otherwise. So techniques were given only to particular disciples who were +ready to shake their sleep, who were ready to be shattered out of their sleepiness. +Ouspensky dedicates one book to George Gurdjieff as "the man who disturbed my +sleep." Such people ARE disturbers. Persons like Gurdjieff or Buddha or Jesus, they are +disturbers. That is why we take revenge upon them. Whosoever disturbs our sleep, we +will crucify him. He doesn't look good to us. We may have been dreaming beautiful +dreams and he comes and disturbs our sleep. We want to kill him. The dream was so +beautiful. + +The dream may be beautiful and I may not be beautiful, but one thing is certain: it is a +dream, and futile, useless! And if it is beautiful, then it is more dangerous because it can +attract you more, it can become a drug. + + +We have been using music as a drug, dancing as a drug. And if you want to use music +and dancing as drugs, then they will become not only drugs for your sleep, they will +become drugs for sexuality also. So remember this point: sexuality and sleep go together. +The more sleepy the person, the more sexual; the more awake, the less sexual. Sex is +basically rooted in sleep. When you awake you will be more loving, the whole energy of +sex will have been transformed to love. + +This sutra says: WHILE LISTENING TO STRINGED INSTRUMENTS, HEAR THEIR +COMPOSITE CENTRAL SOUND - their complete central sound - THUS +OMNIPRESENCE. And then you will know what is to be known, or what is worth +knowing. You will become omnipresent With the music, finding the composite central +core, you will become awake, and with that awakening you will be everywhere. + +Right now, you are somewhere — a point which we call the ego. If you can become +awake, this point will disappear. You will not be anywhere then, you will be +EVERYWHERE — as if you have become the all. You will have become the ocean, you +will have become the infinite. + +The finiteness is with the mind. + +The infiniteness enters with meditation. + + + +THE END. + + + +Chapter 28: Meditation: an unburdening of repressions + + +The first question: + +Question 1 + +REPRESSION HAS BECOME AN AUTOMATIC REACTION IN OUR BODIES AND +MINDS WHICH WE DO NOT EVEN RECOGNIZE OR WANT TO CHANGE ANY +MORE. HOW CAN WE LEARN TO TELL BETWEEN A FALSE IMAGE AND A +REAL ONE IN OURSELVES? + +Many things have to be understood. One: all your faces are false; you do not have any +real face. That is why the question arises over which is false and which is real. If you +have the real, you know. Then the question never arises. All the faces are unreal, false, so +you do not have any comparisons to make. You do not know the real — that is the +difficulty. You have not seen the real, and the real is not seen naturally; much effort is +needed to find it. + +In Zen they say that the real is the original face — the face you had before your birth and +the face you will have after your death. That means that all the faces in life, so-called life, +are false. How to find out what is the real face? You will have to go back to before your +birth. That is the only way to find the real face, because the moment you are born you +have started being false. You have started being false because it pays to be false. + +The child is bom, and he has started to be a politician. The moment he is related to the +world, to the parents, to the family, he is in politics. Now he has to take care about his +faces. He will smile as a bribery. + +He will try to find out in what ways he should behave so that he is accepted more, loved +more, appreciated more. And sooner or later the child will find out what is condemmed +by the parents, by the family, and he will start repressing it. Then the false has entered. + +So all the faces you have are false. Do not try to find out the real one among your present +faces. They are all false, similarly false. They are useful — that is why they have been +adopted — utilitarian, but not true. And the deepest deception is that whenever you +become aware that your faces are false, you will create another face which you will think +is the real. + +For example, a person who lives an ordinary life, in an ordinary world, with a business, a +family, comes to realize the whole of his falseness, the whole inauthenticity of his life, so +he renounces it. He becomes a sannyasin and leaves the world, and he may be thinking +that now the face is real. It is again a false face. It has been adopted as a reaction to other +faces, and with a reaction you can never get to the real. By reacting to a false face you +will create another false face. So what is to be done? + +The real is not something which has to be achieved. The false is your achievement. The +real is not something to be achieved, it is not something to be cultivated. It is something +to be discovered! It is already there. You need not try to attain it, because any effort will +only lead to some other false face. + +For a false face effort is needed; it has to be cultivated. For the real face you have not to +do anything, it is already there. If you simply leave your clinging to the false faces, the +false will drop and that which is real will remain. When you have nothing to drop, and +only that which cannot be dropped is there, you will come to realize what is real. + + + +Meditation is the way to drop the false faces. That is why there is so much insistence on +being thoughtless — because without thought you cannot create a false face. In a +thoughtless state of awareness, you will be real — because it is basically thought which +creates false faces and masks. When there is no thought there can be no face. You will be +faceless, or with the real face — and both mean the same. + +So be aware of your thought process. Do not fight with it, do not repress it. Simply have +awareness: the thoughts are there just like clouds in the sky, and you are looking at them +without any prejudice, either for or against. If you are against, you will be fighting — and +that very fight will create a new thought process. If you are for them, you will forget +yourself and you will float in the current of the thought process. You will not be there as +a conscious witness. If you are for, you will be in the process. If you are against, you will +create another process in reaction. + +So do not be for and do not be against. + +Allow the thoughts to move, let them go wherever they are going, be in a deep let-go, and +simply witness. Whatsoever is passing, witness. Do not judge; do not say, "This is good, +this is bad." If the thought of a divine being comes, do not say, "Beautiful!" The moment +you say this you are identified with it, and you are cooperating with the thought process. +You are helping it, you are giving energy to it, you are feeding it. And if you are feeding +it, it can never drop. + +Or if there is a thought, a sexual thought, do not say, "This is bad; this is sin." Because +when you say, "This is sin," you have created another series of thoughts. Sex is a thought, +sin is a thought, God is a thought. Be neither for nor against. Simply look with +unprejudiced eyes, just watching indifferently. + +This will take time. Because your mind is so occupied with notions, it is very difficult. +The moment we see something we have judged it. We do not wait; there is not even a +single moment's gap. You see a flower, and you have already said, "It is beautiful." In the +very seeing the interpretation comes in. + +You will have to be constantly aware to drop this mechanical habit of judging. You see a +face and you have already judged — ugly, good, bad, or anything else. This judgement +has become so deep-rooted that we cannot see anything simply. The mind enters +immediately. It becomes an interpretation; it is not a simple vision. + +Do not interpret. Simply SEE. + +Sit down in a relaxed posture or lie down. Close your eyes and allow your thoughts to +move. If you say, "Bad!" if you condemn, then you start repressing them. Then you are +not allowing them to move independently. That is why there is so much need for dreams, +because whatsoever you are repressing during the day you will have to release in the +night. That which is repressed goes on forcing its expression, it needs expression. So +whatsoever you repress you dream. Dreams are cathartic. + +Now modern sleep research says that you can be deprived of sleep and not much harm +will result, but you cannot be deprived of your dreams. The old idea that sleep is very +necessary has been found to be false. Instead of sleep, dreams are very necessary, and +sleep is necessary only because you cannot dream without sleep. + +Researchers have developed techniques with which it can now be judged from the outside +whether you are dreaming or whether you are simply asleep. If you are simply asleep, +they will disturb the sleep — the whole night long. When you are dreaming they will +allow it, when you are not dreaming they will disturb the sleep, and no bad result comes + + + +out of it. + +But if they should disturb you when you are dreaming and allow you to sleep when you +are not dreaming, within three days you will begin to feel dizzy, and within seven days +you will feel a deep uneasiness. + +Your body and mind both will feel ill. Within three weeks you will feel a certain type of +insanity. What happens? It is because dreams are cathartic. If you go on repressing during +the day and if the repressions are not allowed to be expressed, they will accumulate in +you, and that accumulation of repression is insanity. + +In meditation you are not to repress any thought. But it is difficult because your whole +mind consists of judgments, theories, 'isms,' doctrines, beliefs. So one who is very deeply +obsessed with any idea, a philosophy or a religion, cannot really enter into meditation. It +is difficult because his obsession will become the barrier. So if you are a Christian or a +Hindu or a Jain, it will be difficult for you to enter meditation because your philosophy +gives you judgements. — This is good and that is not good, this has to be repressed, this is +not to be allowed. + +All philosophies are repressive and all religions, all ideologies, are repressive, because +they give you interpretations. They do not allow you to see life as it is. They force +interpretations on it. + +One who wants to go deep into meditation has to be aware of this nonsense of ideology. +Just be a simple man without any philosophy, with no attitude toward life. Just be a +seeker — one who is in an inquiry, in a deep inquiry to know what life is. Do not force +any ideology over and above it. + +Then it will be very easy to move into meditation. + +Because of this, the greatest meditator the world has ever known, Gautam Buddha, +insisted that no ideology is needed, no philosophy is needed, no concepts about life are +needed. Whether God is or is not is meaningless, irrelevant. Whether MOKSHA, +liberation, exists or not is meaningless. Whether your soul is immortal or not is +meaningless. + +Buddha was so much anti-philosophy not because HE was anti-philosophy, but because +anti-philosophy can become the basic ground for a meditator to jump into the unknown. +Philosophy means knowing something about the unknown without knowing it. It is just +preconceptions, hypotheses, man-constructed ideologies. + +This is to be remembered as a very foundational fact: do not judge, let the mind flow +easily. As the river flows, let the mind flow easily; just sit on the bank watching. And this +watching should be pure — without any interpretations. Sooner or later, when the water +has flown, when the repressed ideas have moved, you will find gaps coming. A thought +will go, and another thought will not be coming, and there will be a gap — an interval. In +that interval, nothingness happens. In that interval you will have the first glimpse of your +real face, of the original face. + +When there is no thought there is no society. When there is no thought there is no other. +When there is no other, no society, you need not have any face. + +Thoughtlessness is facelessness. In that interval, when one thought has gone and another +has not appeared, in that interval, for the first time you will know in reality what is your +face — the face you had when you were not bom and the face you will have when you +die. + + + +All the faces in life are false. And once you know the real face, once you feel this inner +nature which Buddhists call BUDDHA SWAB HAVA — the nature of the inner buddha — +when you come to feel this inner nature even once, even with a single glimpse, you will +be a different person, because now you will constantly know what is false and what is +real. Then you will have the criterion. Then you can compare, and there will be no need +to ask what is real and what is unreal. The question comes only because you do not know +what is real, and whatsoever you know is all unreal. + +Only through meditation will you be able to learn what is a false image and what is a +real, authentic face. Of course, the mind is automatic, and whatsoever you have done has +become mechanical. It is hard to break this mechanicalness. + +The first thing to be understood: mechanicalness is a necessity of life — and your body +has an inner mechanism. Colin Wilson has called it the inner robot, you have a robot +within you. Once trained, once you are trained in anything, that training is passed to the +robot. You can call it memory, you can call it mind, — anything — but the word robot is +good because it is absolutely mechanical, automatic. + +It functions in its own way. + +You are learning to drive. While you are learning, you will have to be aware, alert. A +danger is there. You do not know how to drive and anything can happen, so you will have +to be alert. That is why learning is so painful, one has to be alert constantly. When you +have learned driving, the driving has been given to the robot part of your mind. Now you +can go on smoking, singing, listening to the radio or talking to a friend, or even loving +your girlfriend. You can go on doing anything and the robot part of your being will drive. +You will not be needed; you are relieved of the burden. The robot will do everything. + +You will not even have to remember where to turn; you need not. The robot will know +where to turn, where to stop, where not to stop, what to do and what not to do. You are +not needed; you are relieved of the job. The robot does everything. + +If something very sudden happens, some accident or something that the robot cannot +tackle because it is not trained in it, only then will you be needed. Suddenly there will be +a jerk in your body. The robot will be replaced and you will come in its place. You can +feel that jerk. When suddenly you feel that an accident is going to happen, there is a jerk +inside. The robot moves away; it gives place to you. Now YOU are driving. But when the +accident is avoided, again the robot will take over. + +You will relax and the robot will drive. + +And this is necessary for life because there are so many things to do — so many things! +And if there is no robot to do them, you will not be capable of doing them at all. So a +robot is needed, it is a necessity. + +I am not against the robot. Go and give unto the robot whatsoever you leam, but remain +the master. Do not allow the robot to become the master. This is the problem: the robot +will try to be the master, because the robot is more efficient than you. Sooner or later the +robot will say to you, "Be completely retired. You are not needed. I can do things more +efficiently." + +Remain the master. What can be done in order for you to remain the master of the robot? +Only one thing is possible, and that is: sometimes, without any danger, take the reins into +your hands. Tell the robot to relax, come into the seat, and drive the car — without any +danger, because in danger it is again automatic, the jerk, the replacement of the robot by +you is automatic. + + + +You are driving: suddenly, without any necessity, tell the robot to relax. You come into +the seat and drive the car. You are walking: suddenly remember and tell the body that +"Now I will walk consciously. The robot is not allowed. I am the master and I will move +the body consciously." You are hearing me: it is the robot part which is hearing me. +Suddenly give a jerk to it; do not allow the mind to come in. + +Hear me directly, consciously. + +What do I mean when I say hear consciously? When you are hearing unconsciously, you +are just focused on me and you have forgotten yourself completely. I exist, the speaker +exists, but the listener is unconscious. You are not aware of yourself as the listener. When +I say take the reins in your hands, I mean be aware of the two points: the speaker and the +listener. And if you are aware of the two points, the speaker and the listener, you have +become the third — the witness. + +This witnessing will help you to remain the master. And if you are the master, your robot +cannot disturb your life. It IS disturbing your life. Your total life has become a mess +because of this robot. It helps, it is efficient, but it goes on taking everything from you — +even those things which should not be given to it. + +You have fallen in love: it is beautiful in the beginning because it has not been given to +the robot yet. You are learning. You are alive, aware, alert, and love has a beauty. But +sooner or later the robot will take it over. You will become a husband or a wife, and you +will have given the charge to the robot. + +Then you will say to your wife, "I love you," but YOU will not be saying it. The robot +will be saying it, the gramophone record. Then it is a recorded thing. You just play it +again and again, and your wife will understand it — because whenever your robot says, "I +love you," it means nothing. + +And when your wife says, "I love you," you too will know it is nothing, because a +sentence given by a gramophone record only creates noise. It makes no sense; there is no +sense in it. + +Then you will want to do everything, yet Y OU are not doing it. Then love becomes a +burden and one even wants to escape from love. All your feelings, all your relationships +are now directed by the robot. That is why sometimes you insist on not doing a certain +thing, but the robot insists that you do it because the robot is trained to do it. And you are +always a failure and the robot always succeeds. + +You say, "I am not going to be angry again," but your saying it is meaningless because +the robot is trained. And the training has been long, so just a sentence in the mind that "I +am not going to be angry again," will not have any effect. This robot has been long +trained. So next time when someone insults you, your decision not to be angry will be of +no help. The robot will take charge immediately and the robot will do whatsoever it is +trained to do. And then in the end, when the robot has done it, you will repent. + +But the difficulty, the deep difficulty is this, that even this repentance is done by the +robot, because you have always done that — after the anger you have repented. The robot +has learned that trick also; it will repent, and again you will do the same thing. + +That is why many times you feel that you have done something, said something, behaved +in a certain way, in spite of yourself. + +What does this expression, 'in spite of yourself,' mean? It means that there is another self +within you which can act, which can do something in spite of you. Who is that self? The + + + +robot! + +What to do? Do not take vows that "I will not be angry again." They are self-defeating; +they will not lead you anywhere. Rather, on the contrary, whatsoever you are doing, do it +consciously. Take charge from the robot — with any ordinary thing. When eating, eat +consciously. Do not do it mechanically, as you have done every day. When smoking, +smoke consciously. Do not allow your hand to move to the packet unconsciously, do not +bring the cigarette out unconsciously. Be conscious, alert — and there is a difference. + +I can raise my hand mechanically, just without any awareness; I can raise my hand with +full awareness flowing in my hand. Try it! You will feel the difference. When you are +aware, your hand will be raised very slowly, very silently, and you will feel that the hand +is filled with the awareness. And when the hand is filled with the awareness, your mind +will be thoughtless, because your whole awareness will have moved to the hand. Now no +energy is left to think. + +When you raise your hand automatically, mechanically, you go on thinking and your +hand goes on moving. Who is moving that hand? Your robot. Move it yourself! Do it in +the day at any time, any moment, while doing anything. + +Take charge from the robot. Soon you will be able to have a mastery over the robot. But +do not try it with difficult situations — that is suicidal. We always try with difficult +situations, but because of the difficulty you never win. Start with simple situations, where +even if you are not so efficient no hann is going to result. + +We always try with difficult situations. For example, one man thinks, "I am not going to +be angry." Anger is a very difficult situation and the robot will not leave it to you. And it +is better that the robot should do it because he knows more than you. You decide about +sex — not to do something or to do something — but you cannot follow it through. The +robot will take over. The situation is very complex, and more efficient handling is needed +than you can give it right now. + +Unless you become so perfectly aware that you can tackle any complex situation without +the help of the robot, the robot will not allow you to do it. And this is a very necessary +defense mechanism. If it were otherwise, you would make a great mess of your life — if +you were to go on taking things away from the robot in difficult situations. + +Try! Start with simple things such as walking. Try with this; there is no harm. You can +say to the robot that "There is not going to be any hann. I am just walking, taking a walk, +and I am not going anywhere — just walking. + +So there is no need of you; I can be non-efficient." + +And then be aware and walk slowly. Be filled with awareness throughout your whole +body. When one foot moves, move with it. When one foot leaves the ground, leave the +ground with it. When the other foot touches the ground, touch the ground with it. Be +perfectly aware. Do not do anything else with the mind; just turn the whole mind into +awareness. + +It will be difficult because the robot will interfere continuously. Every moment the robot +will try and will say, "What are you doing? I can do it better than you." And he CAN do +it better. So try it with non-serious things, with non-complex things, simple things. +Buddha has told his disciples to walk, eat and sleep with awareness. If you can do these +simple things, then you will also know how to enter into difficult things with awareness. +Then you can try. + +But we always try with difficult things; then we are defeated. Then the defeated feeling + + + +gives you a deep pessimism about yourself. You start thinking that you cannot do +anything. That is very helpful for the robot. The robot will always help you to do +something when you are in difficulty because then you are defeated. Then the robot can +say to you, "Leave it to me. I can always do it better than you can do it." + +Start with simple things. Zen Buddhists, Zen monks, have been so many times reported to +have been doing this. + +When Bosho was asked, "What is your meditation? What is your SADHANA, spiritual +practice?" he said, "When I feel hungry I eat and when I feel sleepy I go to sleep. This is +all." + +The man who was asking said, "But this we all do. What is special about it?" Bosho +repeated it again. He said, "When I am hungry 'I' eat and when I feel sleepy 'I' sleep." + +And that is the difference. When you feel hungry your robot eats, when you feel sleepy +your robot sleeps. Bosho said "I", and that is the difference. + +If you become more aware in your day-to-day work, in your ordinary life, the awareness +will grow. And with that awareness you will not be just a mechanical thing. For the first +time you become a person — now you are not one. And a person has a face and a +mechanical thing has many masks — no face. + +If you are a person — alive, alert, aware — you can have an authentic existence. If you are +just a mechanical device, you cannot have any authentic existence. Each moment will +change you; each situation will change you. You will be just a floating thing with no +inner core, with no inner being. Awareness gives you the inner presence. Without it you +feel that you are, but you are not. + +Someone asked Buddha, "I want to serve humanity. Tell me how I can serve." Buddha +looked at the man very deeply, penetratingly, with deep compassion, and then he said, +"But where are YOU? WHO will serve humanity? You are not yet. + +First be, and when you are, you need not ask me. When you are, you will do something +which just happens to you which is worth doing." + +Gurdjieff noted that everyone comes with the notion that he is, that he already is. +Someone came to Gurdjieff and asked, "I am very insane inside. My mind goes on in +conflicts, in contradictions, so tell me what I can do to dissolve this mind, to have mental +peace, inner calm." Gurdjieff said, "Do not think about the mind, you cannot do anything +about it. The first thing is to be present. First YOU have to be; then you can do +something. YOU are not." + +What is meant by this "You are not?" It means that you are a robot, a mechanical thing, +working according to mechanical laws. Start being alert. Join awareness with anything +you are doing — and start with simple things. + +The second question: + +Question 2 + +EXPLAIN THE MEANING, PREPARATION AND PROCESS OF MANTRA +DEEKSHA - MANTRA INITIATION. AND WHAT ARE THE REASONS WHY +INDIVIDUALS MUST KEEP THE MANTRA SECRET? + +First try to understand what initiation is, what is DEEKSHA. It is a deep communion, a +deep transfer of energy from the master to the disciple. Energy always flows downwards. +Every energy flows downwards, just like water flows downwards. The master — one who +has attained, one who has known, one who has become — is the highest peak of energy +possible, of purest energy. + + + +.. the Everest of energy. This energy can flow downwards to anyone who is receptive, +humble, surrendered. This surrendered attitude — the receptive attitude, a deep +humbleness — will be needed to receive. Otherwise you yourself are a peak; you are not a +valley. Then the energy cannot flow downwards to you. + +You are a different sort of peak, the peak of ego — not of energy, not of being, not of +bliss, not of consciousness. You are a density of ego, of "I-ness." You are a peak, and +with this peak no initiation is possible. Ego is the barrier because ego closes you and you +cannot surrender. + +To be a disciple, to be initiated, one has to surrender himself totally. And there is no +partial surrender. Surrender means total. You cannot say, "I partially surrender" — it +makes no sense. Then you are still there with your ego. Ego has to be surrendered, and +when you surrender the ego you become receptive, open. You become like a valley, and +then the peak can flow downwards to you. And I am not talking symbolically, it is so +actually. + +Have you ever been in love? Then you can feel that love actually flows between two +bodies, it is an actual flow. Energy is being transmitted, transferred, received, given. But +love is on the same level. You both can remain peaks of ego, and still love can be. + +But with a master you are not on the same level. And if you try to be on the same level, +initiation becomes impossible. + +Love is possible, but initiation becomes impossible. Initiation is possible only when you +are on a lower level — just humble, surrendered, open to receive — when the disciple is +feminine, just womb-like, passive, able to receive. The master is the male factor in +initiation. + +This secret of initiation is now completely lost because the more we are educated, the +more civilized, the more cultured, then the more egoistic we become. And now, to +surrender has become very, very impossible. It has always been difficult, but now it is +impossible. + +Initiation is a transfer of inner energy, actual energy, and the master can enter in you and +can transfonn you if you are ready and receptive. But then deep trust is needed — more +trust than is needed in love — because you do not know what is going to happen. You are +completely in the dark. + +Only the master knows what is going to happen and what he is doing. He knows; you +cannot know. And there are things that cannot be said about what is going to happen +because with the human mind there are many problems. One problem is this: that if +something is said before it happens, it will change the happening. It cannot be said. + +So there are many things which the master cannot say to you. He can do them to you, but +he cannot say them to you. That doing is initiation. He actually moves in you — in your +body, in your mind. + +He cleanses you, changes you. The only thing required is your total trust, because +without it there is no opening and he cannot enter you: your doors are closed. + +You are always defending yourself. Life is a struggle — a struggle for survival, to survive. +This struggle gives you a closing. You are closed, afraid; you are afraid to be vulnerable. +Someone may enter, someone may do something within you. So you shrink yourself, you +remain closed — just hiding behind, constantly defending. + +In initiation you have to lose this defense; this armor of defense has to be thrown away. +You become vulnerable, and then the master can enter you. + + + +For example, it is just like a deep love act. You can rape a woman, but you cannot rape a +disciple. You can rape a woman because it is a bodily rape, and the body can be raped +and entered without any consent. Without the will of the woman you can rape. It is a +forced thing. The body is material; things can be forced on it. + +Something just like this happens in initiation. The master enters your spirit, not your +body. Unless you are ready and receiving, the entrance is not possible. A disciple cannot +be raped because it is not a bodily question. It is a question of spirit, and you cannot force +entry into a spirit. No violence is possible with it. + +So when the disciple is ready and open, just like a loving woman, inviting and receptive, +ready, in a deep let-go, only then can the master enter and work. + +And centuries of work can be done in moments. You may not be able to do in many lives +certain things which can be done in a moment. But then you have to be vulnerable, totally +trusting. You do not know what is going to happen and what he will do inside you. + +A woman is afraid because the sexual act is a journey into the unknown for her. Unless +she loves the man, unless she is ready to suffer, to carry the burden of a child, to carry the +child for nine months and then make a life commitment to it, unless she is deeply in love, +she will not allow the man to enter her body — because it is not simply her body, it is her +whole life. When she is in deep love, then she is ready to suffer, to sacrifice. And to +sacrifice and suffer in deep love is blissful. + +But the problem with the disciple is deeper. It is not a question only of a physical birth, of +a new child, it is HIS rebirth. He himself is going to be reborn. He will die in a certain +sense and he will be bom in a certain different sense. And this is possible if the master +enters him, but the master cannot force it. No force is possible, the disciple can only +invite it. + +And that is the problem — a very great problem in spiritual discipleship, because the +disciple goes on defending himself or herself, goes on creating more and more annor +around him. He behaves with his master in the same way he would behave with anyone +in the world; the same defense mechanisms go on working. + +And then time is wasted unnecessarily, energy is wasted, and the moment is delayed +which can happen right now. But this is natural, and sometimes even with great masters +disciples have missed the chance. + +Ananda, one of the great disciples of Buddha and the nearest, couldn’t attain liberation +while Buddha was alive. Buddha was with Ananda for forty years, and Ananda couldn’t +attain. But many who came after Ananda attained, and then it became a problem. And +Ananda was one of the nearest — the closest. He was sleeping in the same room with +Buddha, he was moving with Buddha for forty years continuously. He was like a shadow +to Buddha; as much as he knew about Buddha even Buddha might not have known. + +But he couldn't attain; he remained the same. And a very ordinary thing was the only +barrier: he was an elder cousin-brother of Buddha. This created the ego. + +Buddha died... a great council met to write down whatsoever Buddha had said. It had to +be written then. Soon those who lived with Buddha would be no more, so everything had +to be recorded. But the council would not allow Ananda, and only he knew the greater +experiences, the statements of Buddha, his life, his biography. This was all known to +Ananda; no one knew so much. + +But the council decided that Ananda could not be allowed because he was still +unenlightened. He could not record Buddha's sayings because an ignorant man cannot be + + + +believed. + + +He would not deceive, but with an ignorant man nothing is reliable. He may think that +something happened, and he may relate it authentically as far as he knows, but he is a +man who is not yet awakened. Whatsoever he has seen and heard in sleep could not be +believed, so only those would record who had become awakened — they decided. + +Ananda was weeping just outside the door. The door was closed, and he remained just by +the door for twenty-four hours, weeping, crying and screaming. But they would not allow +him. For these twenty-four hours he was weeping, weeping, and then suddenly he +became aware what had been the barrier — why he hadn’t been able to attain while +Buddha was alive, what had been the barrier. + +Then he went back into his memories. A forty-year-long life with Buddha! He +remembered the first day when he came to him for initiation. But he had one condition, +and that was why he missed the whole initiation. He could not be initiated because be +made a condition. + +He came to Buddha and he said, "I have come to be a disciple of yours. Once I become +your disciple, you will be the master and I will have to follow whatsoever you say, I will +have to obey. But right now I am your elder brother, and I can order you and you will +have to obey. You are not the master, I am not the disciple. Once I am initiated, you will +be the master and I will be the disciple. + +Then I will not be able to say anything, so before I become a disciple these are my three +conditions. Say yes to these three conditions; then initiate me." + +The conditions were not very big, but a condition is a condition and then your surrender +is not total. They were very small conditions, very loving conditions. He said, "One, I +will always be with you. You cannot tell me to move anywhere else. While I am alive I +will be your shadow; you cannot order me away. Give me the promise — because later on +I will be just a disciple, and if you order me away I will have to follow. This will be a +promise given to an elder brother — that I will be with you. You cannot tell me to move +anywhere else. I will just be your shadow; I will sleep in the room where you sleep. +"Secondly, whenever I will say, 'Meet this man,’ you will have to meet him. Whatsoever +your reason for not meeting, you will have to agree. If I want that someone should be +given your DARSHAN — spiritual presence — you will have to give it. + +"And thirdly, if I say that someone has to be initiated, you cannot refuse. Grant me these +three conditions. Promise me and then initiate me. I will not ask anything again because +then I shall be just a disciple." + +When he remembered this, while he was weeping, crying before the door of the council, +after he went back into his memories, he suddenly became aware that the initiation was +not there because he had not been receptive. + +Buddha had agreed. He said, "Okay!" and he followed the three conditions his whole life. +But Ananda missed, the nearest one missed. + +And the moment he realized this he became enlightened. That which couldn’t happen +with Buddha happened when he was no more: he surrendered. + +If there is surrender, even an absent master can help you. If there is no surrender, even an +alive master who is present cannot help you. So in initiation, in any initiation, surrender +is needed. + +Mantra initiation means that when you have surrendered, the master will enter you — + + + +your body, your mind, your spirit. He will move in you to find a sound for you, so that +whenever you chant that sound you will be a different man in a different dimension. + +A mantra cannot be given unless you have surrendered totally, because mantra giving +means the master has entered you and felt the deep harmony, the inner music of your +being. And then he gives a symbolic sound which is in harmony with your inner music. +The moment you chant that sound you enter the world of your inner music, the inner +hannony is entered. + +That sound is just a key, and a key cannot be given unless the lock is known. So I cannot +give you a key unless I kn ow your lock, because a key is meaningful only when it can +unlock. Any key will not do, and everyone is a particular lock — you need a particular +key. That is why mantras are to be kept secret. + + +If you give your mantra to someone he may experiment with it, but that key will not suit +that lock. And sometimes, when you force a wrong key into a lock you can destroy the +lock, you can disturb the lock. You can so much disturb it that even when a right key is +found it may not work. That is why mantras are to be kept absolutely secret. They are not +told to anyone; that is a promise you make. The master gives you a key, it is a key only +for you. You cannot go on distributing it — for many that would be harmful. + +You will be allowed to give keys only when your lock is totally opened. But then you +will not give THIS key to anyone. Then you will have become capable of entering into +the other. Then you will be able to feel the lock and devise a key for it. + +The key is always devised by the master. If there is a heap of keys, one who doesn’t know +may think all keys are the same. There may be only very small differences, minute +differences, and even the same word can be used differently. For example, Aum. This has +three sounds — "A-U-M." If emphasis is given on the "U", the mid-sound, it is one key. If +emphasis is given on the "A", it is a different key. If the emphasis is given on the "M", it +is still a different key; it will open different locks. That is why there is so much emphasis +on the exact use of the mantra as it is given by the master. + +So the master gives the mantra in your ear; he chants it exactly as it should be used. + +He chants it in your ear, and you have to become so alert that your whole consciousness +comes to the ear. He chants it, and then it enters into you. You have to remember it now +— the exact use of it. + +That is why individuals must keep their mantras secret; they should not be made public. +They are dangerous, and if you are initiated you know it. If a master has really given you +a key, you know it. You treasure it like anything; you cannot go on distributing it. It can +be hannful for others and it can be harmful for you also — for many reasons. + +Firstly, you are breaking a promise, and the moment the promise is broken your contact +with the master is broken. You will not be in contact with him again. If the promise is +kept, there is a constant contact. + +Secondly, if you give the mantra to anyone and talk about it, it comes to the surface of +the mind. The deeper roots are broken, it becomes a gossip. + +Thirdly, if you can keep anything secret, the more you keep it secret, the deeper it goes. It +is bound to go deeper. + +It is said of Marpa that when he was given the secret mantra by his master, the promise +was there that the mantra would be kept absolutely secret. "You are not to talk about it," +he was told. + + + +Then Marpa's master appeared in his dream and he said, "What is your mantra?" Even in +the dream Marpa kept his promise, he refused to tell it. + +And it is said that because of the fear that someday in a dream the master may come or +send someone, and he may be so asleep that he would break the secret and the promise +would be broken, he stopped sleeping altogether. He would not sleep! + +He had not been sleeping for seven or eight days, and his master asked Marpa, "Why are +you not sleeping? I see you do not go to sleep at all, so what is the matter?" Marpa said, +"You are playing tricks with me. You came in a dream and you were asking for the +mantra. I cannot tell even you. Once the promise is there, it will not come out of my +mouth even in a dream. But then I became fearful. In sleep, who knows! Someday I may +forget." + +If you are so aware of keeping the promise that even in a dream you remember it, then it +is going deep. It is going deep, it is entering inner realms. And the deeper it moves, the +more it will be a key to you — because the lock is at the deepest layer. Try with anything. +If you can keep it a secret, it will move deep. If you cannot keep it a secret, it will move +out. + +Why do you want to say something to someone? Why do you chatter? Really, anything +that you chatter about you are relieved of. Once you tell it you are relieved of it; it has +moved out. + +The whole psychoanalysis is nothing but this. The psychoanalyst is just listening and the +patient goes on talking. It helps the patient — because the more he talks about his +problems, inner conflicts and associated ideas, the more he is relieved of them. + +The reverse happens when you can keep a secret. At no moment are you allowed to talk +about it. It will enter deep, deep, and one day it will hit the exact lock. + +One question more: + +Question 3 + +IN REFERENCE TO THE MEDITATION TECHNIQUES BASED ON SOUNDS, +PLEASE EXPLAIN THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN THE CHAOTIC MUSIC +PLAYED IN YOUR DYNAMIC MEDITATION AND THE SHAKE OR ROCK +MUSIC OF THE WEST. + +Your mind is in chaos. That chaos has to be brought out, acted out. Chaotic music can be +helpful, so if you are meditating and chaotic music is played or chaotic dancing is there +around you, it will help to bring out your chaos. You will flow in it, you will become +unafraid of expression. And this chaotic music will hit your chaotic mind within and will +bring it out. It helps. + +Rock, jazz, or other music which is chaotic in a way also help something to come out, +and that something is repressed sexuality. I am concerned with all your repressions. +Modern music is more concerned just with your repressed sex, but there is a similarity. +However, I am not concerned only with your repressed sex, I am concerned with all your +repressions — sexual or not sexual. + +Rock music, or other music like that, is so influential in the West because of Christianity. +Christianity has been repressing sex for twenty centuries. They have forced sex to go so +deep down inside that every man has become a pervert deep down. + +So the West has to relieve itself of the sin that Christianity has done with man, with his +mind, through music, through dance, through chaotic painting, chaotic poetry — in every + + + +dimension. + +In the West mind has to be completely freed somehow from the whole centuries-long past +of repression. In every way they are doing it. All that is influential today is chaotic. But +sex is not the only thing, there are many other things also. Sex is the basic thing, it is very +important, but there are other things also. Your anger is repressed, your sadness is +repressed, even your happiness is repressed. + +Man as he is is a repressed being. He is not allowed to do anything, he has just to follow +rules. He is not a free agent but just a kept slave, and the whole society is a big prison. + +The walls are very subtle: they are glass walls, transparent. You cannot see them, but +they are, and everywhere. Your morality, your culture, your religion, they are all walls. +They are transparent, you cannot see them, but whenever you want to cross them you are +thrown back. + +This state of mind is neurotic. The whole society is ill. That is why I so much insist on +chaotic meditation. Relieve yourself, act out whatsoever society has forced on you, +whatsoever situations have forced on you. Act them out, relieve yourself of them, go +through a catharsis. The music helps. + +Once you can throw out everything that has been repressed in you, you will become +natural again, you will be a child again. + +And with that child many possibilities open. With you everything is closed. When you +become again a child, then only can your energies be transformed. Then you are pure, +innocent, and with that innocence and purity transfonnation is possible. + +Perverted energies cannot be transformed. Natural, spontaneous energy is needed. That is +why I insist so much on acting out things: so that you can throw the society out. The +society has entered you very deeply. It has not left YOU anywhere; it has entered from +everywhere. You are a citadel, and the society has entered from everywhere. Its police, +its priests, they have done much to make you a slave. You are not free, and man can +attain to bliss only when he becomes a total freedom. + +For you to be made a total freedom the whole society has to be thrown out of you, but +that doesn’t mean that you are going to become anti-social. Once you throw the society +out, once you become aware of your pure freedom inside, you can live with the society; +there is no need to be anti. But then the society cannot enter into you. You can move in it, +you can act in it, but then the whole thing becomes just a psychodrama — you are acting. +Now the society cannot kill you, cannot make a slave of you; you are acting knowingly. +Those who become anti-social simply show that they are still bound to the same society. +All the anti-social movements in the West are reactionary, not revolutionary. + +You are reacting to the same society, you are related to the same society in a reverse +manner. You are standing on your head, that is all. You are doing SHIRS HAS ANA — the +headstand posture — but you are the same person. Whatsoever the society is insisting +upon, you are doing quite the contrary — but you are still following the society. This will +not help. + +If you are anti you will never be beyond the society, you will always be part of it. If the +society dies, you will die. Think of what in the West they now call the establishment — +the society that is established — and the alternate societies of hippies, yippies, or others. +They exist as a part of this establishment. If the establishment is dissolved, they will be +nowhere. They cannot exist by themselves; they are just a reaction. + +You cannot create a society of hippies by itself. Hippies can exist only as an alternate + + + +society WITH an establishment — just as a reaction. They cannot exist independently. So +howsoever much they may think they are independent, they are not independent. The +establishment is their source, their life. Once the establishment is not there, they will be +at a loss where to move and what to do. Whatsoever they are doing is dictated by the +establishment. They go against it, but the directions, the instructions are given by the +establishment. + +If the establishment says short hair, you can be long-haired. + +But if there is no establishment, then what to do? If the establishment says cleanliness, +you can be dirty. But if there is no establishment and no fuss about cleanliness, you are +nowhere. If the establishment says this, you can do that — quite the reverse — but you +follow the establishment. + +So anti-socials are not revolutionaries. They are reactionaries, a part and a product of the +same society — those who have moved against it in bitterness. + +A meditator, a sannyasin, is not anti-society, he is beyond society. He is not against the +establishment, neither is he for it — but he takes it non-seriously. He knows it is just a +play; he moves in it like an actor. And if you can move in the society like an actor on the +stage, it never touches you; you remain beyond it. So do not be for it, do not be against it. +But how can you do it? You can do it only when you have thrown the society out of you. +If it is there, then there are two paths open to you: follow it or go against it. But you are +bound to it; you are in bondage. First one has to clean oneself of society, then for the first +time you become an individual. Right now you are not, you are just a social unit. + +When the society is thrown out, when its entire presence is thrown out, you are again +back to your childhood: you have become innocent. And this innocence is deeper than +that which any child can have, because you know the fall as well and now you have risen. + +It is a resurrection. You have experienced, you have known the whole nonsense. Now +you are again pure. This purity becomes the temple for the divine. + +Once you can throw the society out of you, without any bitterness, without going against +it or being involved in any reaction... if you can simply throw society out of you, the +divine can enter into you. + +With society in, the divine will remain out; with society out, the divine can enter — +because the divine means existence. Society is a human, local phenomenon. Existence is +greater, infinite. It is not concerned with man, morals, traditions, it is concerned with the +very roots of being. + +One has to be beyond society, not against it, remember. And this chaotic method helps +you. It is a catharsis. + + +THE END. + + + +Chapter 29: Sound methods for the dropping of the mind + + +18. INTONE A SOUND AUDIBLY, THEN LESS AND LESS AUDIBLY AS +FEELING DEEPENS INTO THIS SILENT HARMONY. + +19. WITH MOUTH SLIGHTLY OPEN, KEEP MIND IN THE MIDDLE OF THE +TONGUE. OR, AS BREATH COMES SILENTLY IN, FEEL THE SOUND "HH". + +20. CENTER ON THE SOUND "AUM" WITHOUT ANY "A" OR "M". + +Tantra divides life into two dimensions: one is the S ANSAR — that which is, the world; +and the other is MOKSHA — that which can be, the ultimate, the hidden which can +become manifest. But there is no contradiction between these two. The hidden is just here +and now, in the world — of course, unknown to you, but not non-existent. It is there. The +ultimate and the immediate are not two things, but just two dimensions of one existence. +So for tantra there is no contradiction, there is no duality. The one appears as two because +of our limitations; because we cannot see the whole. The moment we can see the whole, +one appears as one. The division is not in reality, but in our limited knowledge. That +which we know is S ANSAR — the world; and that which is unknown but which can be +known is MOKSHA — the transcendental, the ultimate, the absolute. + +For other traditions, there is a conflict between the two; for tantra there is no conflict. + +This has to be understood very deeply in the mind and in the heart. Unless this is +understood deeply, you will never be able to understand the viewpoint of tantra. + +And whatsoever is your belief, that belief is of duality. Whether you are a Christian or a +Mohammedan or a Hindu or a Jain, your belief is of duality, of conflict. The world +appears to be something which is against the divine, and you have to fight the world to +reach the divine. This is the common belief of all so-called religions, particularly +organized religions. + +Mind can understand duality very easily. Rather, it can understand only duality because +the very function of the mind is to divide. The very function of the mind is to cut the +whole into fragments. + +The mind works like a prism, and when a ray of light enters the prism it is divided into +seven colors. Mind is a prism and reality is divided through it. That is why mind revels in +analysis. It goes on dividing things into fragments, and it cannot prevent itself unless +there is nothing to be divided anymore. So mind has a tendency to reach to the atomic, +the lowest division. It goes on dividing, dividing, until a moment comes when no division +is possible. If division is still possible, it will divide still further. + +Mind goes to the fragment, to the minutest fragment, and reality is a whole, not the +fragment. So a completely reverse process is needed to know the real: a process which is +of synthesis, not of analysis; a process which crystallizes, not one which divides. A no- +mind process is needed. + + +Tantra denies divisions and tantra says that the whole is whole. The part that we know is +the world, the part that is hidden is the divine, or God, or whatsoever you name it — but +the hidden is just here and now. You are not aware of it, but it is here and now. It is +already. For you it will be in the future, but in the existence it is here and now. You may +have to travel to it; you may have to attain a no-mind attitude of looking at things — then + + + +it will be revealed. You are just standing and the morning sun is rising, but you are +standing with closed eyes. The morning is here and now, but for you it is not here and +now. When you will open your eyes, only then will it become a fact for you. + +In the existence the morning exists, but not for you. You are closed to it, it is hidden for +you. For you there is only darkness and the light is hidden. But if you open your eyes, +any moment the morning will become a fact to you. It was already a fact, only you were +blind. + +Tantra says that the world is already the divine, but you are blind. So whatsoever you +know in your blindness is to be called the world, and whatsoever is hidden because of +your blindness is the divine. This is one of the basic tenets — that this sansar is the +moksha, this very world is divine, this very world is the ultimate. The immediate and the +ultimate are not two, but one. The here and there are not two, but one. + +Because of this insistence, many things become possible for tantra. One: tantra can +accept everything, and the deep acceptance relaxes you completely. Nothing else can +relax you. + +If there is no division between this world and that, if the transcendental is imminent here +and now, if matter is just the body of the divine, then nothing is denied, nothing is +condemned and you need not be tense. Even if it may take ages for you to come to realize +the divine, there is no hurry for tantra. It is already there, and time is not lacking. It is +eternally here; whenever you will open your eyes you will find it. And whatsoever you +are already getting is the hidden divine. + +So the Christian attitude of condemnation, of sin, or other such religious attitudes, is +totally a lie to tantra — and absurd, because if you condemn something you also become +divided inwardly. You cannot divide things only outwardly. If you divide, you also will +be divided in parallel. If you say that this world is wrong, then your body will become +wrong because your body is part of this world. + +If you say that this world is something which is a hindrance to reaching the ultimate, then +your whole life will be condemned and you will feel guilty. Then you cannot enjoy, then +you cannot live, then you cannot laugh. Then seriousness will become your face. You can +be only serious; you cannot be non-serious, you cannot be playful. + + +That has happened to all the minds all over the world. They become dead, serious. +Through seriousness they become dead because they cannot accept life as it is. They +deny it, and they feel that unless they deny they cannot reach the other world. + +So the other world becomes the ideal, the future, the desire, the vision, and this world +becomes a sin. Then one feels guilty with it. And any religion that makes you guilty, +makes you neurotic. It drives you crazy! In this sense, tantra is the only healthy religion. +And whenever any religion becomes healthy, it becomes tantra — it becomes tantric. So +every religion has two aspects. One is the outer aspect: the church, the organization, the +publicized, the public face, the exoteric. This aspect is always life-denying. The other +aspect is the inner core. Every religion has that too: the esoteric. It is always tantric — +totally accepting. + +Unless you accept the world totally, you cannot be at ease within. Non-acceptance +creates a tension. Once you accept everything as it is, you are at home in the world. +Tantra says this is a basic thing: you must be at home. Only then does something more +become possible. If you are tense, divided, in conflict, in anguish, in guilt, how can you + + + +transcend? You are so much mad inside, you cannot travel further. You are so much +engaged here, so much possessed by the here, you cannot go beyond. + + +This seems paradoxical. Those who are too much against the world are too much in it; +they have to be. You cannot go away from your enemy, you are possessed by the enemy. +If the world is your enemy, no matter what you do or pretend to do you will remain +worldly. You may even renounce it, but your very approach will be worldly. + +I have seen one saint, a very renowned one... He will not touch money, and if you put +some coins before him, he will close his eyes. This is neurotic, this man is ill! What is he +doing? But people worship him because of this. They think he is so otherworldly. He is +not, he is too much in the world. Even you are not so much in the world. What is he +doing? He has just reversed the process; now he is standing on his head. He is the same +man — the same man who was greedy for money. Constantly he must have been thinking +of money, accumulating possessions. Now he has become quite the opposite, but he +remains the same within. Now he is against money, now he cannot touch it. + +Why this fear? Why this hatred? Remember, whenever there is hatred it is love in +reverse. You can hate a thing only if you have been in love with it. Hate is always +possible only through love. You can be against something only if you have been so much +for it, but the basic attitude remains the same: this man is greedy. + +I asked this man, "Why are you so much afraid?" + +He said, "Money is the hindrance. Unless I use will against my greed toward money, I +cannot reach the divine." + +So now it is only a new sort of greed. He is in a bargain: if he touches money he loses the +divine. And he wants to get the divine, he wants to possess the divine, so he is against the +money. + +Tantra says, do not be for the world, do not be against the world, just accept it as it is. Do +not create any problem out of it. How is this going to help you? If you do not create any +problem out of it, if you do not grow neurotic over it — this way or that — if you remain +simply in it and accept it as it is, your whole energy is relieved from it and can move to +the hidden realm, to the hidden dimension. + +Acceptance in this world becomes transcendence for that. Total acceptance here will lead +you, will transform you to the other dimension, the hidden dimension, because all your +energy is relieved; it is not engaged here. Tantra believes deeply in the concept of +NIYATI — fate. Tantra says, take this world as your fate and do not be worried about it. +Once you take it as your niyati, as your fate, you accept it, whatsoever it is. You are not +worried about changing it, about making it different, about making it according to your +desire. Once you accept it as it is and you are not bothered by it, your total energy is +relieved, and then this energy can penetrate inwards. + +These techniques can be helpful only if you take this attitude; otherwise they will not be +helpful. + +And they look so simple. If you start them directly as you are, they will seem simple, but +you will not succeed in them. The basic framework is lacking. Acceptance is the basic +framework. Once the acceptance is there in the background, these very simple methods +will work wonders. + + +The sixth method concerning sound: + + + +INTONE A SOUND AUDIBLY, THEN LESS AND LESS AUDIBLY AS FEELING +DEEPENS INTO THIS SILENT HARMONY. + +Any sound will do, but if you love a certain sound it will be better, because if you love a +certain sound then the sound is not just sound. When you intone the sound, then you are +also intoning a hidden feeling with it, and by and by the sound will be dropped and only +feeling will remain. + +The sound has to be used as a passage toward feeling. Sound is mind and feeling is heart. +Mind has to use a passage toward the heart. It is difficult to enter the heart directly. +Because we have been missing it so much and for so many lives, we do not know from +where to move to the heart. How to enter it? The door seems closed. + +We go on talking about the heart, but that talk also is just in the mind. We say that we +love through the heart, but this too is cerebral; in the head. Even the talk of the heart is in +the head. And we do not know where the heart is. I do not mean the physical part of it, +we know about that. But then physicians will say, medical science will say, that there is +no possibility of love in it. + +It is just a pumping system. Nothing else is in it, and all else is just myth and poetry and +dreaming. + +But tantra knows a deep center hidden behind your physical heart. That deep center can +only be reached through the mind because we are standing in the mind. We are there in +the head, and any travel inwards has to begin from there. Mind is sound. If all sound +stops, you won't have any mind. In silence there is no mind — that is why there is so +much insistence on silence. Silence is a no-mind state. + +Ordinarily we say, "My mind is silent." This is absurd, meaningless, because mind means +absence of silence. So you cannot say that the mind is silent. If mind is, there cannot be +any silence, and when silence is, there is no mind. So there is no such thing as a silent +mind; there cannot be. It is just like saying that someone is alive-dead. It makes no sense. +If he is dead, then he is not alive. If he is alive, then he is not dead. You cannot be alive- +dead. + +So there is nothing like a silent mind. When silence comes, mind is not there. Really, +mind goes out and silence comes in; silence comes in and mind goes out. Both cannot be +there. Mind is sound. If the sound is systematic you are sane, if the sound has gone +chaotic you are insane; but in both the cases sound is there, and we exist at the point of +the mind. + +So how to drop from that point to the inner point of the heart? Use sound, intone sound. + +One sound will be helpful. If there are many sounds in the mind, it is difficult to leave +them. If there is only one sound, it can be left easily. So first many sounds are to be +sacrificed for one sound. That is the use of concentration. + +Intone one sound. Go on intoning it, first audibly so that you can hear it, and then by and +by, slowly, inaudibly. No one else can hear it then, but you can hear it inside. Make it +more quiet, make it less and less audible, and then suddenly drop it. There will be silence, +an explosion of silence — but feeling will be there. Now there will be no thought, but +feeling will be there. + +That is why it is good to use a sound, a name, a mantra, for which you have some feeling. +If a Hindu uses "Ram," he has some feeling for it. It is not simply a word for him, it is not +only in his head. The vibrations reach to his heart also. He may not be aware, but it is +deep-rooted in his bones, in his very blood. There has been a long tradition, a long + + + +conditioning, for many lives. If you have been attached to one sound continuously, it is +very deep-rooted. Use it. It can be used. + +A Christian can use "Ram," but it will remain in the mind, it will not go deep. It is better +that he uses "Jesus" or "Maria" or something else. It is very easy to be influenced by a +new idea, but it is difficult to use it. You do not have any feeling for it. Even if you are +convinced in the mind that this will be better, this conviction is on the surface. + + +One of my friends was living in Gennany. He was there for thirty years and he +completely forgot his mother tongue — he was a Maharashtrian and his mother tongue +was Marathi. But he had forgotten it, for thirty years he was using German. German +became just like his mother tongue. I say just like because no other tongue can become +your mother tongue. There is no possibility because the mother tongue remains deep +down inside of you. He consciously forgot it, and he was not able to speak or understand +it. + +Then he fell ill, and he was so ill that his whole family had to go there to see him. He was +unconscious, but sometimes consciousness would come. Whenever he would become +conscious he would speak German and whenever he would become unconscious he +would mutter in Marathi. Consciously he couldn’t understand anything of Marathi; +unconsciously he couldn’t understand anything of German. + +Deep in the unconscious Marathi remained; it was the mother tongue. And you cannot +replace the mother tongue. You can put other things over and above it, you can +overimpose other things, but you cannot replace it. Deep down, it will remain. + +So if you have a feeling for a certain sound, it is better to use it. Do not use an intellectual +sound, it will be of no help because the sound has to be used to make a passage from the +mind to the heart. So use some sound for which you have a deep love, a certain feeling. + + +If a Mohammedan uses "Ram," it is very difficult, the word means nothing to him. That +is why the two oldest religions never believe in conversion — Hinduism and Judaism. +They are the two oldest religions, the two original religions, all other religions are just +offshoots of these two. Christianity and Islam are offshoots of the Jewish tradition; +Buddhism, Jainism, Sikhism are offshoots of Hinduism. These two original religions +never believed in conversion, and the reason was this: that you can convert a man +intellectually, but you cannot convert a man from his heart. You can convert a Hindu into +a Christian, you can convert a Christian into a Hindu, but the conversion will remain of +the mind. + +Deep down a converted Hindu remains a Hindu. He may go to a church and he may pray +to Mary or to Jesus, but his prayer remains of the head. You cannot change the +unconscious. And if you hypnotize him, you will find he is a Hindu. If you hypnotize him +and let him reveal his unconscious, you will find he is a Hindu. + +Hindus and Jews never believed in conversion because of this basic fact. You cannot +change a man’s religion because you cannot change his heart and unconscious feelings. +And if you try, then you disturb him, because you give him something which will remain +on the surface and you divide him. Then he becomes a split personality. Deep down he is +a Hindu; on the surface he is a Christian. + + +He will use Christian sounds, mantras, which will not go deep, and he cannot use Hindu + + + +sounds which can go deep. You have disturbed his life. + +So find a certain sound for which you have some feeling. Even your own name may be +helpful. If you do not have any feeling for anything else, then your own name will be +helpful. There are many cases on record... One very famous mystic, Bukkh, used his own +name, because he said, "I do not believe in any God. I do not know about him, I do not +know what his name is. There are names I have heard, but there is no proof that they are +his name. And I am in search of myself, so why not use my own name?" So he would use +his own name, and just by using his own name he would drop down into silence. + +If you do not have any love for anything else, use your own name. But it is very difficult +because you are so condemning toward yourself that you do not have any feeling, you do +not have any respect toward yourself. Others may be respectful toward you, but you are +not respectful toward yourself. + +So the first thing is to find any sound that will be helpful: for example, your lover's name, +your beloved's name. If you love a flower, then "rose" will do, anything — any sound that +you feel good using, uttering, listening to, from which you feel a certain well — being +coming to you. If you cannot find one, then there are some suggestions from traditional +sources. + +"Aum" can be used, "Amen" can be used, "Maria" can be used, "Ram" can be used, or +Buddha's name, or Mahavir's name, or any name that you have a love for. But a feeling +must be there. That is why the Master's name can be helpful, if you have the feeling. But +feeling is essential! + +INTONE A SOUND AUDIBLY, THEN LESS AND LESS AUDIBLY AS FEELING +DEEPENS INTO THIS SILENT HARMONY. And go on reducing the sound. Intone it +more slowly, more inaudibly so that even you have to make an effort to hear it inside. Go +on dropping, go on dropping, and you will feel the change. The more sound will drop, the +more you will be filled with feeling. When sound disappears, only feeling remains. This +feeling cannot be named. It is a love, a deep love, but not toward anyone — this is the +difference. + +When you use a sound or a word, the love is attached to a label. You say, "Ram, Ram, +Ram..." You have a deep feeling for this word, but the feeling is addressed to "Ram," +narrowed down to "Ram." When you go on reducing the "Ram," a moment will come +when "Ram" disappears, the sound disappears. Now only the feeling remains, the feeling +of love — not toward Ram, it is now not addressed. There is simply a feeling of love — +not toward anyone, not even toward; there is simply a feeling of love, as if you are in an +ocean of love. + +When it is not addressed, then it is of the heart. When it is addressed, it is of the head. + +Love toward someone is through the head; simple love is of the heart. And when love is +simple, unaddressed, it becomes prayer. If it is addressed, it is not yet prayer; you are just +on the way. That is why I say if you are a Christian you cannot start as a Hindu, you +should start as a Christian. If you are a Mohammedan you cannot start as a Christian, you +should start as a Mohammedan. But the deeper you go, the less you will be a +Mohammedan or a Christian or a Hindu. + +Only the start will be Hindu, Mohammedan or Christian. The more you will proceed +toward the heart, as the sound will be less and less and feeling more and more, you will +be less a Hindu, less a Mohammedan. When the sound disappears, you will simply be a +human being — not Hindu, not Mohammedan, not Christian. + + + +It is like the difference between 'sects' and 'religion'. Religion is one, sects are many. + +Sects help you to begin. If you think that they are the end, then you are finished. They are +just the beginning. You have to leave them and go beyond, because the beginning is not +the end. In the end there is religion; in the beginning there is just a sect. Use the sect to +go toward religion; use the limited to go toward the unlimited; use the finite to go toward +the infinite. + +Any sound will do. Find your own sound. And when you intone it, you will feel whether +you have a loving relationship with it, because the heart will start vibrating. + +Your whole body will begin to be more sensitive. You will feel as if you are falling into +something warm, just like your beloved's lap; something warm begins enveloping you. +And this is a physical feeling also, not simply a mental feeling. If you intone a sound +which you love, you will feel a certain wannth around you, inside you. Then the world is +not a cold world, it is warm. + +If you have gone to a Hindu temple, then you must have heard of the GARBHAGRIHA +— the womb house. The innennost center of the temple is known as GARBHA — the +womb. You might not have observed why it is called the womb. If you intone the sound +of the temple — and every temple has its own sound, its own mantra, its own ISHTA +DEVATA, its own deity, and the related mantra of the deity — if you intone that sound, +the same wannth as there is in the womb of the mother is created. That is why the garbha, +the womb of the temple, is made just similar to the womb of the mother: round-shaped, +almost closed, with only one opening. + +When Christians came for the first time to India and discovered Hindu temples, they felt +that these temples were really unhygienic — not ventilated at all, with only one little door. +But the womb is with only one door and not ventilated at all. That is why the temple was +made only with one door, just like a womb, and if you intone that sound, that womb +becomes alive. + +And also it is called the garbha because you can get a new birth there, you can become a +new man. + +If you intone a sound that you love, that you have feeling for, you will create a sound- +womb around you. So it is good not to practice this method under the open sky. You are +very weak, you cannot fill the whole sky with your sound. It is better to choose a small +room, and if the room is such that it vibrates your sound it is good, it will help you. And +if you can choose the same place every day, it will be very good. It becomes charged. If +the same sound is repeated every day, every atom, the very space becomes a milieu. + +That is why followers of other religions are not allowed in the temples. In Mecca, no one +can enter if he is not a Mohammedan, and this is good. Nothing is wrong in it, it is +because Mecca belongs to a particular science. One who is not a Mohammedan goes +there with a sound which will be disturbing to the whole milieu. If a Mohammedan is not +allowed into a Hindu temple, there is no insult in it. And all those social reformers who +do not know anything about temples, religion and esoteric science, they go on giving +slogans, nonsense slogans, and they are disturbing everything. + +A Hindu temple is for Hindus because a Hindu temple is a particular place — a created +place. For millennia they have been working on it to make it alive, and anyone can +disturb it. + + +That disturbance is very dangerous. A temple is not a public place. It is for a particular + + + +purpose and for particular people; it is not for visitors. That is why visitors were not +allowed in the old days. Now they are allowed because we do not know what we are +doing. A visitor should not be allowed. It is not a place to see, to go to for sightseeing. It +is a created space filled with particular vibrations. + +If it is a Ram temple and you were bom in a family where Ram’s name has been sacred, +loved, then when you enter an alive space which is always filled with Ram's name, even +if you do not want to chant, even if you are not using the Ram mantra, you will start +chanting. The space all around will press you. Those vibrations all around will hit you, +and you will start chanting from deep down. So use a place — a temple is good. + +These methods are temple methods. A temple is good, or a mosque or a church. Your +own house is not good for these methods, because with so many sounds you have a +chaotic space around you and you are not so strong that just by your sound you can +change the space. So it is better to go to a certain place which belongs to a certain sound, +and then use it. And it is good to go to the same place every day. + +By and by you will become powerful. By and by you will drop down from the mind to +the heart. Then you can do this method anywhere and the whole cosmos becomes your +temple. + +Then there is no problem. But in the beginning it is good to choose the place, and if you +can even choose the time, exactly the same time every day, it is good because then the +temple waits for you. Right at that exact time, the temple waits for you. It is more +receptive; it is happy that you have come. And I mean physically; this is not a symbolic +thing, but a physical one. + +It is just as if you take your meals every day at a particular time. At that particular time +your whole body feels the hunger. The body has its own inner clock, it feels the hunger +exactly at that time. If you go to sleep every day at a particular time, your whole body +gets ready at that particular period. If you change every day your sleeping time and your +food time, you are disturbing your body. + +Now they say your age will be affected by it. If you go on daily changing your body +routine, then if you were going to be alive for eighty years you will be alive only for +seventy years. Ten years will be lost. And if you go regularly with the body clock, then if +you were going to live for eighty years you will live for ninety very easily. Ten years can +be added. + +Exactly like this, everything all around you has its own clock, and the world moves in +cosmic time. If you enter the temple at exactly the same time every day, the temple is +ready for you and you are ready for the temple. These two readinesses meet, and the +results are magnified a thousandfold. + + +Or you can create a small corner in your house. But then do not use that comer for any +other purpose, because every purpose has its own vibrations. If you use that corner for a +business purpose or you play cards there, that space becomes confused. And now these +confusions can even be recorded on mechanical devices; it can be known if the space is +confused. + +If you can create a corner in your house, a small temple, it is very good. If you can afford +a small temple, that is the first thing to be tried. But do not use it for any other purpose. +Let it be absolutely private for you, and results will come very soon then. + + + +The seventh sound technique: + +WITH MOUTH SLIGHTLY OPEN, KEEP MIND IN THE MIDDLE OF THE +TONGUE. OR, AS BREATH COMES SILENTLY IN, FEEL THE SOUND "HH." + +Mind can be focused anywhere in the body. Ordinarily, we have focused it in the head, +but it can be focused anywhere. And with a change of the focus, your qualities change. +For example, in many Eastern countries — Japan, China, Korea — traditionally it has been +taught that mind is in the belly, not in the head. And because of this, those who thought +that mind is in the belly had different qualities of mind. You cannot have those qualities +because you think mind is in the head. + +Really, the mind is nowhere. The brain is in the head; the mind is not there. + +"Mind" means your focusing. You can focus it anywhere, and once focused it is very +difficult to remove it from that point. + +For example, now psychologists and workers who are doing in depth human research say +that when you are making love your mind must move from the head to the genital area; +otherwise your sex will be a frustration. If it remains in the head, you cannot go deep into +sex. No orgasm will result, the experience will not be orgasmic. It will not give you a +peak. You may produce children, but you will not have known what is the highest peak +of love. + +You have not known that about which tantra talks or Khajuraho depicts, you cannot. + +Have you seen Khajuraho? Or if you have not seen Khajuraho, you might have seen +pictures of the Khajuraho temple. Then look at the faces, at couples making love. Look at +the faces, the faces look divine. They are in the act of sex, but the faces are as ecstatic as +any buddha's face. What is happening to them? This sex is not cerebral. They are not +making love through the head; they are not thinking about it. They have dropped down +from the head. Their focusing has changed. + +Because of this dropping from the head, the consciousness has moved to the genital area. +The mind is no more. The mind has become no-mind. Their faces have the same ecstasy +as a buddha has. This sex has become a meditation. Why? Because the focus has +changed. + +If once you can change the focus of your mind, if you can remove it from the head, the +head is relaxed, the face is relaxed. Then all tensions have dissolved. You are not there, +the ego is not there. + +That is why the more mind becomes intellectual, rational, the less capable it becomes of +love, because love needs a different focusing. In love you need a focusing near the heart; +in sex you need a focusing near the genital center. If you are doing mathematics, the head +is okay. But love is not mathematics and sex is absolutely not. And if the mathematics +continues in the head and you are making love, you are simply wasting energy. Then this +whole effort will be disgusting. + +But mind can be changed. Tantra says there are seven centers, and mind can be changed +to any center. Each center has a different functioning. If you concentrate on a particular +center, you become a different man. + +In Japan there has been a military group, which is just like the KSHATRIYAS in India, +known as the SAMURAI. They are trained to be soldiers, and their first training is to +bring the mind down to just two inches below the navel. In Japan this center is called the +HARA. The samurai are trained to bring the mind to the hara. Unless a soldier can bring +his mind's focusing to the hara, he is not allowed to go to fight, and this is right. The + + + +samurai are the greatest fighters the world has ever known, the greatest warriors; in the +world there is no comparison with a samurai. + +He is a different man, a different being, because his focusing is different. + +They say that when you are fighting there is no time. Mind needs time to function; it +calculates. If you are attacked and your mind thinks about how to protect, you have +missed the point already, you have lost. There is no time. You must function timelessly +and mind cannot function timelessly, mind needs time. Howsoever short, mind needs +time. + +Below the navel there is a center, the hara, which functions timelessly. If the focusing is +at the hara and the fighter is fighting, then this fight is intuitive, not intellectual. Before +you attack him, he knows. It is a subtle feeling in the hara, not in the head. It is not an +inference, it is a psychic telepathy. Before you attack him, before you think of attacking +him, the thought has reached him. His hara is hit and he is ready to protect himself. Even +before you have attacked, he is in defense, he has protected himself. + +Sometimes, if two persons are fighting and both are samurais, defeating the other is a +problem. Neither can defeat the other; it is a problem. No one can be declared the winner. +In a way it is impossible because you cannot attack the man — before you attack, he +knows. + +There was one Indian mathematician... The whole world was wonderstruck because he +would not calculate. Ramanujam was his name. You would give him the problem and he +would give you the answer immediately. + +One of England's best mathematicians, Hardy, visited Ramanujam. Hardy was one of the +best mathematicians ever born, and he had to work with a particular problem for six +hours. But Ramanujam was given the same problem and he answered immediately. There +was no possibility for the mind to function in this way, as the mind needs time. +Ramanujam was asked again and again, "How do you do it?" He would say, "I don’t +know. You give me the problem, and the answer comes to me. It comes from somewhere +below. It is not from my head." It was coming from the hara. He was not aware, he was +not trained, but this is my feeling: he must have been a Japanese in his previous birth +because in India we have not worked much upon the hara. + +Tantra says, focus your mind on different centers and the results will be different. This +technique is concerned with focusing on the tongue, in the middle of the tongue. WITH +MOUTH SLIGHTLY OPEN — as if you are going to speak. Not closed, but slightly open +as if you are going to speak; not like when you are speaking, but like when you are just +going to speak. + +Then keep the mind in the middle of the tongue. You will have a very strange feeling, +because the tongue has a center just in the middle which controls your thoughts. If you +suddenly become aware and you focus on that, your thoughts will stop. Focus as if your +whole mind has come to the tongue — just in the middle. + +Let the mouth be slightly open as if you were going to speak, and then focus the mind as +if it is not in the head. Feel it as if it is in the tongue, just in the middle. + +The tongue has the center of speech, and thought is speech. What are you doing when +you are thinking? Talking within. Can you think anything without talking within? You +are alone; you are not talking to anyone, you are thinking. What are you doing while you +are thinking? Talking within, talking to yourself. Your tongue is involved. Next time, + + + +while you are thinking, be aware: feel your tongue. It is vibrating as if you are talking to +someone else. Then feel it again, and you can feel that the vibrations are centered in the +middle. They arise from the middle and then they spread all over the tongue. + +Thinking is talking within. If you can bring your total consciousness, your mind, to the +center of the tongue, thinking stops. So those who have been practicing silence, they are +simply practicing not talking. If you stop talking outwardly, then you will become very +deeply aware of talking inside. And if you remain completely silent for one month or two +months or one year, not talking, you will feel your tongue vibrating violently. You are +not feeling it because you go on talking and the vibrations are released. But even now, if +you stop and become conscious while thinking, you will feel your tongue vibrating a +little. + +Stop your tongue completely and then try to think — you cannot think. Stop your tongue +completely as if it is frozen; do not allow it to move. You cannot think then. + +The center is just in the middle, so bring your mind there. WITH MOUTH SLIGHTLY +OPEN, KEEP MIND IN THE MIDDLE OF THE TONGUE. OR, AS BREATH COMES +SILENTLY IN, FEEL THE SOUND "HH." + +This is the second technique. It is just similar: OR, AS BREATH COMES SILENTLY +IN, FEEL THE SOUND "HH." + +With the first technique your thinking will stop, you will feel a solidity within — as if you +have become solid. When thoughts are not there you become immovable; thoughts are +the inner movement. And when thoughts are not there and you have become immovable, +you have become part of the eternal, which only appears to move but which is +immovable, which remains unmoved. + +In thoughtlessness you become part of the eternal, the unmoved. With thought you are +part of the movement, because nature is movement. The world is movement, that is why +we have called it the S ANSAR, the wheel — it is moving and moving and moving. The +world is movement and the hidden, the ultimate, is unmoved, unmoving, immovable. + +It is just like a wheel that is moving, but a wheel is moving on something which never +moves. A wheel can move only because in the center there is something which never +moves, which remains unmoved. + +The world moves and the transcendental remains unmoved. If your thoughts stop, +suddenly you drop from this world to the other. With the movement stopped inside, you +become part of the eternal — that which never changes. + +OR, AS BREATH COMES SILENTLY IN, FEEL THE SOUND "HH." Open your +mouth slightly, as if you are going to speak. Then inhale, and be aware of the sound +which is created by inhaling. It is just "HH" — whether you are exhaling or inhaling. You +are not to make the sound, you are just to feel the incoming breath on your tongue. It is +very silent. You will feel "HH." It will be very silent, very slightly audible. You have to +be very alert to be aware of it. But do not try to create it. If you create it, you have missed +the point. Your created sound will be of no help, it is the natural sound that happens +when you inhale or exhale. + +But the technique says while inhaling, not exhaling — because while exhaling you will go +out, and with the sound YOU will go out, while the effort is to go in. So while inhaling, +hear the sound "HH." Go on inhaling and go on feeling the sound "HH." Sooner or later +you will feel that the sound is not being created only at the tongue, it is being created in +the throat also. But then it is very, very inaudible. With very deep alertness you can + + + +become aware of it. + +Start from the tongue, then by and by be alert; go on feeling it. + + +You will hear it in the throat, then you will start hearing it in the heart. And when it +reaches the heart, you have gone beyond mind. All these techniques are just to give you a +bridge from where you can move from thought to no-thought, from mind to no-mind, +from the surface to the center. + +The eighth sound technique: + +CENTER ON THE SOUND "AUM" WITHOUT ANY "A" OR "M". + +CENTER ON THE SOUND "AUM" - A-U-M, AUM - WITHOUT ANY "A” OR "M". +Just the "U" remains. This is a difficult technique, but for some it may be suitable, +particularly for those who work with sound: musicians, poets, those who have a very +sensitive ear, for them this technique can be helpful. For others, those who have no +sensitive ear, this is very difficult because it is very delicate. + +You have to intone Aum, and you have to feel in this Aum three sounds separately: A-U- +M. Intone Aum, and in the sound you have to feel three sounds — A-U-M. They are there, +infused together. A very delicate ear can be aware, can hear A-U-M separately while +intoning. They are separate — very close, but separate. If you cannot hear them +separately, then this technique cannot be done. Your ears will have to be trained for it. + +In Japan, particularly in Zen, they train the ears first. They have a method of training the +ears. The wind is blowing outside — it has a sound. The master will say, "Concentrate on +it. Feel all the nuances, the changes: when the sound is angry, when the sound is furious, +when the sound is compassionate, when the sound is loving, when the sound is strong, +when the sound is delicate. Feel the nuances of the sound. The wind is blowing through +the trees — feel it. The river is running — feel the nuances." + +For months together the seeker, the meditator, will be sitting by the side of the bank of +the river, listening to it. It has different sounds. Everything is changing. In the rain it will +be flooded; it will be very much alive, overflowing. The sounds will be different. In the +summer it will be reduced to nothingness, sounds will cease. But there will be inaudible +sounds if one is listening, if you listen. All the year round the river will be changing, and +one has to be aware. + +In Hermann Hesse's book SIDDHARTHA, Siddhartha lives with a boatman. And there is +no one, just the river, the boatman and Siddhartha. And the boatman is a very silent man. +He has lived all his life with the river. He has become silent, he rarely speaks. Whenever +Siddhartha feels lonely, he tells Siddhartha to go to the river, to listen to the river. It is +better than listening to human words. + +And then by and by, Siddhartha is attuned to the river. Then he begins to feel its moods — +the river changes moods. Sometimes it is friendly and sometimes it is not, and sometimes +it is singing and sometimes it is weeping and crying, and sometimes there is laughter and +sometimes there is sadness. + +And then he begins to feel the slight, delicate differences. His ear becomes attuned. + +So in the beginning you may feel it to be difficult, but try. Intone Aum, go on intoning it, +feeling A-U-M. Three sounds are combined together in it: Aum is a synthesis of three +sounds. Once you start feeling them differently, then drop "A" and "M". Then you cannot +say Aum: "A" will be dropped, "M" will be dropped. Then "U" will remain. Why? What +will happen? The real thing is not the mantra. It is not A-U-M or the dropping. The real + + + +thing is your sensitivity. + +First you become sensitive of three sounds, which is very difficult. And when you +become so sensitive that you can drop the "A" and "M" and only the middle sound +remains, in this effort you will lose your mind. You will be so much engrossed in it, so +deeply attentive to it, so sensitive to it, that you will forget to think. And if you think, you +cannot do this. + +This is just an indirect way to bring you out of your head. So many ways have been tried, +and they look very simple. You wonder, "What can happen? Nothing will happen by such +simple methods." But miracles happen, because it is just indirect. Your mind is being +focused on something very subtle. If you focus, you cannot go on thinking; mind will +drop. Suddenly one day you will become aware, and you will wonder what has happened. +In Zen they use koans. + +One of the famous koans they tell to the beginner is, "Go and try to hear the sound of one +hand. You can create a sound with two hands. If one hand can create a sound, hear it." +One small boy was serving a Zen master. He would see many people coming. They +would come to the master, put their head at his feet, and then they would ask the master +to tell them something to meditate on. He would give them a koan. The boy was just +doing some work for the master, he was serving him. He was just nine or ten years of +age. + +Seeing every day many people coming and going, one day he also came very seriously, +put his head at the master's feet, and then asked him, "Give me some koan, some object +for meditation." The master laughed, but the boy was very serious, so the master said, +"Okay! Try to hear the sound of one hand. And when you have heard it, then come to me +and tell me." + +The boy tried and tried. He couldn’t sleep the whole night. In the morning he came and he +said, "I have heard. It is the sound of the wind blowing through the trees." The master +said, "But where is the hand involved in it? Go again and try." So he would come every +day. He would find some sound and then he would come, and the master would say, + +"This is also not it. Go on trying, go on trying!" + +Then one day the boy didn't come. The master waited and waited, and then he told his +other disciples to go and find out what had happened — it seemed the boy had heard. + +So they went around. He was sitting under a tree, absorbed — just a newborn buddha. +They came back and they said, "But we are afraid to disturb the boy. He is looking just +like a newborn buddha. It seems he has heard the sound." So the master came, put his +head at the boy's feet and asked him, "Have you heard? It seems you have heard." The +boy said, "Yes, but it is soundlessness." + +How did this boy develop? His sensitivity developed. He tried every sound, he listened +attentively. Attention developed. He would not sleep. The whole night he would listen for +what is the sound of one hand. He was not so intellectual as you are, so he never thought +that there cannot be any sound of one hand. If the koan is given to you, you are not going +to try. You will say, "What nonsense! There cannot be any sound with one hand." + +But the boy tried. The master had said there must be something in it, so he tried. He was +a simple boy, so whenever he would hear something, whenever he would feel this was +something new, he would come again. But by this process his sensitivity developed. He +became attentive, alert, aware. He became one -pointed. He was in search, and the mind +dropped because the master said, "If you go on thinking you may miss. Sometimes there + + + +is the sound which is of one hand. Be so alert that you do not miss it." + +He tried and tried. There is no sound of one hand, but that was just an indirect method to +create sensitivity, awareness. + +And one day, suddenly, everything disappeared. He was so attentive that only attention +was there, so sensitive that only sensitivity was there, so aware — not aware of +something, but simply aware! And then he said, "I have heard it, but it is soundlessness. +It is soundlessness!" But you have to be trained to be attentive, to be alert. + +This is just a method to make you very delicately aware of the subtle nuances of sound. +Just doing this, you will forget Aum. Not only will "A" drop, not only will "M" drop, but +one day suddenly you will also drop, and there will be soundlessness, and you will be a +newborn buddha sitting under a tree. + +THE END. + + + +Chapter 30: Surrendering to a Master + + +The first question: + +Question 1 + +LAST NIGHT YOU DISCUSSED THE ATTITUDE OF TOTAL ACCEPTANCE AS +THE BASIC GROUND FOR ALL TANTRIC SADHANA - SPIRITUAL PRACTICE. +IF I REMEMBER CORRECTLY, ON ANOTHER DAY YOU SAID THAT THE +SCIENCE OF TANTRA TEACHES TO BE IN THE MIDDLE IN EVERYTHING, +BEING FREE FROM THE EXTREMES IN LIFE. IN THIS REFERENCE, EXPLAIN +HOW ONE CAN COME TO UNDERSTAND THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN +INDULGENCE AND REPRESSION IN ONE’S SEX LIFE.” + +Accepting the total life means the middle path. If you deny, you move to the opposite +extreme. Denial is extreme. If you deny anything, you deny it for something; then you +move to one extreme. If one denies sex, he will move to BRAHMACHARYA, celibacy - +to the other extreme. If you deny brahmacharya, you will move to indulgence - to the +other extreme. The moment you deny, you have accepted the extreme path. + +Acceptance of totality is to be automatically in the middle. You are neither for something +nor against something. You have not chosen, you are just floating in the stream. You are +not moving toward a goal — you have no choice. You are in a let-go. + +Tantra believes in a deep let-go. When you choose, your ego comes in. When you +choose, your will comes in. When you choose, you are moving against the whole +universe — you have your own choice. When you choose, you are not choosing the +universal flow: you are standing aloof, isolated; you are like an island. + +You are trying to be yourself against the whole flux of life. + +Non-choosing means you are not to decide where life goes. You allow the life to move, +to take you with it, and you have no fixed goal. If you have a fixed goal, you are bound to +choose. Life's goal is your goal. You are not moving against life; you have no ideas of +your own against life. You leave yourself, you surrender yourself, to the life force itself. +This is what tantra means by total acceptance. + +And once you accept life in its totality things start happening, because this total +acceptance frees you from your ego point. Your ego point is the problem, because of it +you create problems. There are no problems in life itself; existence is problem-less. You +are the problem and you are the creator of the problem, and you create problems out of +everything. Even if you meet God, you will create problems out of him. Even if you +reach paradise, you will create problems out of paradise - because you are the original +source of the problems. You are not going to surrender. This non-surrendering ego is the +source of all problems. + +Tantra says that it is not a question of achieving something; it is not a question of +achieving brahmacharya. If you achieve brahmacharya - celibacy — against sex, your +brahmacharya will remain basically sexual. Two extremes, howsoever opposite, are parts +of one whole - two aspects of one thing. + +If you choose one, you have chosen the other also. The other will be hidden now, +repressed. What does repression mean? Choosing one extreme against the other, which is +a basic part of it. + +You choose brahmacharya against sex, but what is brahmacharya? It is just the reversal + + + +of sex energy, You have chosen brahmacharya, but you have also chosen sex with it. +Now brahmacharya will be on the surface, and deep down there will be sex. You will be +disturbed because your choice will create the disturbance. You can choose only one pole, +and the other pole follows automatically. And you are against the other pole, so now you +will be disturbed. + +Tantra says, do not choose: be choiceless. Once you understand this, the question will +never arise of what is indulgence and what is repression. Then there is no repression and +no indulgence. The question arises only because you are still choosing. There are people +who come to me and they say, "We will accept life, but if we accept life when will +brahmacharya happen?" They are ready to be in total acceptance, but the readiness is +false, just superficial. Deep down they are still clinging to the extremes. + +They want brahmacharya - celibacy. They have not achieved it by fighting with sex, so +when they hear me they think, "As we have not been able to achieve it through fighting, +now we should achieve it through acceptance." But the achieving mind, the motivated +mind, the greedy mind, is there - and the goal is there, the choice is there. + + +If you have something to achieve, you cannot accept the totality; the acceptance is not +total. Then you are also trying acceptance as a technique to achieve something. +Acceptance means: now you leave that achieving mind, that motivated mind that is +always for something, hankering for something — you leave it! You allow life to flow +freely, just as the wind is flowing through the trees. You allow life to be free, to move +freely through you; you have no resistance. Wherever it leads, you are ready to move. + +You have no goal. If you have any goal then you will have to resist life, then you will +have to fight it. + +If a tree has some goal, some leaning, some idea, then it cannot allow the wind to move +freely through it. If it wants to go south, then the wind which is forcing it north will be +the enemy. + +If you have some goal, you cannot accept life as a friend. Your goal creates the enmity. If +you expect something out of life, you are forcing yourself on life, you are not allowing +life to happen to you. Tantra says, things happen when you do not expect them, things +happen when you do not force them, things happen when you are not hankering after +them. + +But this is a consequence, not a result. And be clearly aware of the difference between +'consequence’ and 'result'. A result is consciously desired; a consequence is a by-product. +For example, if I say to you that if you are playing happiness will be the consequence, +any play, you will try it for a result. + +You go and you play, and you are waiting for the result of happiness. But I told you it +will be the consequence, not the result. + +Consequence means that if you are really in the play, happiness will happen. If you +constantly think about happiness, then it is going to be a result; it will never happen. A +result is a conscious effort; a consequence is just a by-product. If you are deep in play, +you will be happy. But the very expectation, the conscious longing for happiness, will not +allow you to be deep in play. The longing for the result will become the barrier and you +will not be happy. + +Happiness is not a result, it is a consequence. If I tell you that if you love you will be +happy, happiness will be a consequence, not a result. If you think that because you want + + + +to be happy you must love, nothing will come out of it. The whole thing will be bogus +because one cannot love for any result. Love happens! There is no motivation behind it. + +If there is motivation, it is not love. It may be anything else. If I am motivated and I think +that because I long for happiness I will love you, this love will be false. And because it +will be false, happiness will not result out of it. It will not come; that is impossible. But if +I love you without any motivation, happiness follows like a shadow. + +Tantra says, acceptance will be followed by transformation, but do not make acceptance a +technique for transfonnation. + +It is not! Do not long for transformation — only then does transfonnation happen. If you +desire it, your very desire is the hindrance. Then there is no question of what indulgence +is and what repression is. + +This question comes to the mind only because you are not ready to accept the whole. +Accept it! Let it be indulgence and accept it! If you accept it, you will be thrown to the +middle. Or let it be repression and accept it! If there is acceptance, you will be thrown to +the middle. Through acceptance you cannot remain with the extreme. 'Extreme’ means +denial of something - accepting something and denying something. 'Extreme' means +being for something and against something. The moment you accept whatsoever is the +case you will be thrown to the middle, you will not remain with the extreme. + +So forget any intellectual understanding of what repression is and what indulgence is. It +is nonsense and it will not lead you anywhere. Just accept, wherever you are. If you are in +indulgence, accept it. Why be afraid of it? + +But there is a problem. If you are in indulgence, you can remain in indulgence only if you +are simultaneously trying to transcend it. That gives a good feeling to the ego: you can +feel good and you can postpone. You know this is not going to be forever. You feel, +"Today I am indulgent, but tomorrow I will be beyond it." The tomorrow helps you to be +in indulgence today. + +You know that "Today I am drinking alcohol or smoking, but this is not going to be for +all my life. I know this is bad, and tomorrow I am going to leave it." + +That hope for tomorrow helps you to indulge today, and that is a good trick. Those who +want to indulge, they must have great ideals. Those ideals give you opportunity. Then +you need not feel very guilty about whatsoever you are doing because in the future +everything is going to be okay; this is just for the moment. This is a trick of the mind. So +those who indulge, they always talk of non-indulgence. Those who indulge, they go to +the masters, who are against it. And you can see a deep relationship... + +If you are after riches, money, power, you will always worship someone who is against +riches - the ascetic. One who has renounced will be your ideal. A rich society can +worship and respect only one who has renounced riches. Look around and you will see. If +you are indulging in sex, you must respect a person who has gone beyond it, who has +become a brahmachari - a celibate. You will worship him. He is the ideal; he is your +future. You are thinking that someday you are going to be like this man. You worship +him. + +And if one day some rumor comes to you that he is indulging in sex, the respect is gone, +because you cannot respect yourself. You are so self-condemning of whatsoever you are +that if you find that your master is just like you, the respect is gone. + + +He must be just the opposite. Then he gives you hope. Then he can lead you to the + + + +opposite end. Then you can follow him. + +So there is always a very deep relationship between the followers and the master. You +will always see them on opposite poles: the follower will be just on the opposite pole, +and he is a follower only because of this. If you are obsessed with food, then you can +respect only a person who goes for long fasting. He is "the miracle." You hope someday +to attain the same. He is your future. You can worship him and respect him. He is the +image, but this image helps you to be whatsoever you are; it is not going to change you. +The very effort to change, the very idea to change, is the hindrance. This is the insight of +tantra. + +Tantra says, whatsoever you are, accept it. Do not create any ideals. They are dreams - +and false. Accept whatsoever is. Do not call it good or bad, do not try to justify it or +rationalize it. Live in the moment and see that this is the case. Remain with the fact and +accept it. This is difficult - very difficult, arduous. Why is it so difficult? Because then +your ego is shattered. Then you know that you are a sexual animal. Then the high ideal of +brahmacharya cannot help your ego at all. Then you know that you are ninety-nine +percent an animal... and that one percent I leave you just not to shock you too much. + +With the ideals of Mahavir, Buddha, Krishna, Christ, you feel you are ninety-nine +percent divine and only one percent is lacking. + +So sooner or later, by the grace of God, you will attain it. You feel happy as you are. That +will not help. That will not help at all! That can help only to postpone the real problem, +the real crisis, and unless you face that crisis you will never be transformed. One has to +pass through it; one has to suffer it. But only the facticity of life leads you toward the +truth. Fictions will not help. + +So remain with the fact. Whatsoever you are - animal or whatever - is okay. Sex is there, +anger is there, greed is there: okay, so it is there. It is so, such is the case. The universe +happens to you in this way; you have found yourself in this way. It is how life has made +you; it is how life is forcing you, leading you to somewhere. + +Relax and allow the life to lead you. What is the difficulty in relaxing? The difficulty is +that if you relax, you cannot maintain the ego. Ego can be maintained only in resistance. +When you say No, ego is strengthened. When you say Yes, ego simply disappears. + +That is why it is so difficult to say Yes to anything. Even in ordinary things it is so +difficult to say Yes. We want to say No. The ego, the "I", feels good only when it is +fighting. If you are fighting with someone else, it is good, the ego feels good. If you are +fighting with yourself the ego feels even more good, because to fight with someone else +creates more problems around you. + +When you are fighting with yourself, there is no problem around you. When you are +fighting with someone else, the society will create problems for you. When you are +fighting with yourself, the whole society will worship you. It is good because you are not +hanning anyone. + +And really, if you are someone who is harming yourself, if you are not allowed to hann +yourself you will harm others. Otherwise where will that energy move? So society is +always happy with those idiots who are harming themselves. The society feels good +because the violence is redirected back; they will not do any harm. + +That is why we call them SADHUS -the good ones. They are good ones because they can +do much harm — they ARE doing it — but they are doing it to themselves. They are +suicidal. A killer, a murderer, can become suicidal if he turns against himself, so the + + + +society feels good, unburdened of a murderer if he becomes suicidal. The society pays +respect, appreciates him. But the person remains the same — he remains violent. Now he +is violent with himself, or he remains greedy but he talks of non-greed. + +But look! Try to understand the talk of non-greed. The base is always greed. They say +that if you are non-greedy, only then will you achieve paradise. And what is to be gained +in paradise? Everything that greed would like. + +So be non-greedy to achieve paradise. If you are not a celibate, you will not go to heaven. + +And what are you going to achieve in heaven? All that you condemn here on earth. Then +beautiful women are allowed, and there is no comparison - because anyone who is +beautiful on earth will become ugly, this is what the SHASTRAS, scriptures say. And the +women that are in heaven never become old, they remain fixed at the age of sixteen. So +be celibate here so that you can indulge there. + +But what type of logic is this? The motivation remains the same. The motivation remains +exactly the same! Only the objects change, the time sequence changes. You are +postponing your desires for the future. This is a bargain. + +Tantra says, try to understand this whole working of the mind, and then it is good not to +fight, then it is good to flow as you are and accept it. We are afraid because if we accept, +then how will we change? And tantra says, acceptance is transcendence. You have tried +fighting and you have not changed. Look at your whole life, analyze it, and if you are +honest you will find that you have not changed a single bit, not an inch. Move back +toward your childhood. Analyze your whole life, and no matter what you may be talking +and thinking, the exact, actual life has remained the same. And you have been fighting +continuously. Nothing happens out of it. + +So now try tantra. Tantra says, do not fight; no one ever changes with fight. Accept! + +Then there is no question of what is indulgence and what is repression, and what is +brahmacharya and what is this and that. + +There is no question then! Whatsoever is, you accept it and flow with it. You dissolve +your ego resistance, you relax into the existence and go wherever it leads. If the destiny +of the existence is that you are meant to be an animal, then, says tantra, be an animal. +What will happen out of it and how does it happen? Tantra says, total transformation +happens - because once you accept, the inner division dissolves, you become one. Then +there are not two in you - the saint and the animal, the saint repressing the animal and the +animal throwing the saint aside every moment. Then there is no two in you: you become +one. + +And this oneness gives energy. All your energy is wasted in inner fight and conflict. This +acceptance makes you one. Now there is no animal who is to be condemned and no saint +who is to be appreciated. You are whatsoever you are. You have accepted it, you have +relaxed with it, so your energy becomes one. Then you are a whole and not divided +against yourself. + +This wholeness is an alchemical transformation. With this wholeness you have energy. +Now you are not wasting your life. There is no inner conflict; you are at ease within. This +energy which you gain through non-conflict becomes your awareness. + +Energy can move in two dimensions. If it moves in fight, you are wasting it every day. If +it accumulates and there is no fight, a moment comes just like when you go on heating +water to a hundred degrees: then the water becomes something else, it evaporates. + + + +Then it is no more liquid, it becomes a gas. It will not become transformed at ninety-nine +degrees. It will become transformed only at a hundred degrees. + +The same happens inwards. You are wasting your energy every day, and the evaporating +point never comes. It cannot come because energy is not accumulated at all. Once the +inner fight is not there, energy goes on accumulating and you feel more and more strong. +But not the ego: the ego feels strong only when fighting. When there is no fight, the ego +becomes impotent. YOU feel strong, and that "you" is a totally different thing. You +cannot know about it unless you are whole. Ego exists with fragments, division. This +"you," the self or what we call the ATMAN, exists only when there is no division, no +inner fight. 'Atman’ means the whole; 'Self means the undivided energy. + +Once this energy is undivided, it goes on accumulating. You are producing it every day, +life energy is produced in you, but you are wasting it in fight. This same energy comes to +a point where it becomes awareness — this is automatic. Tantra says, this is automatic. +Once you know how to be whole, you will become more and more aware, and the day +will come when your total energy will be transformed into awareness. + +When the energy is transfonned into awareness many things happen, because then the +energy cannot move to sex. When it can move to a higher dimension, it will not move to +a lower dimension. + +Your energy goes on moving to the lower dimension because there is no higher for you. +And you do not have the level of energy where it CAN move into the higher, so it moves +into sex. It moves into sex and you become afraid of it, so you create the ideal of +brahmacharya and you become divided. Then you become less and less energetic. You +are wasting energy! + +This is a very potent experience - that when you are weak you feel more sexual. This +looks absolutely absurd in biological terms, because biology will say that when you are +more potent you will feel more sexual. But this is not the case. When you are weak, ill, +you will feel more sexual. When you are healthy and a subtle well-being is there, you +will not feel so sexual. + +And the quality of sex will also be different. When you are weak, the sexuality will be a +sort of disease and a vicious circle will be created. Through sex you will become more +weak, and the more weak you become the more sexual you will feel. And the sex will +become cerebral; it will move into your head. + +When you are healthy, when a well-being is there, when you feel blissful, relaxed, you +are not so sexual. Then even if sex happens, it is not a disease. Rather, it is an +overflowing. A totally different quality is there. When sex is an overflowing, it is just +love expressing itself through bio-energy. It is creating a deep sharing, a deep contact +through bio-energy. + +It is a part of love. + +When you are weak and sex is not overflowing it is a violence against yourself, and when +it is a violence against yourself it is never love. A weak person can have sex, but his sex +is never love. It is more or less rape - and rape to both the parties; to himself also it is a +rape. But then a vicious circle is created: the more weak he feels, the more sexual he +feels. + +But why does this happen? Biology has no explanation for it, but tantra has an +explanation. Tantra says that sex is an antidote against death. Sex is an antidote against +death! Sex means life for society. You may die, but life will continue. So whenever you + + + +feel weak, death is near, tantra says that then sex will become very important because +you may die at any moment. Your energy layer has gone down. You may die at any +moment, so indulge in sex so someone can live. Life should go on. + +For tantra, old men are more sexual than young men. And this is a very deep insight. +Young men are more sexually potent, but not so sexual; old men are less sexually potent, +but more sexual. So if we can enter an old man's mind, then we can know what is +happening. + +As far as sex energy is concerned, it is less in old men, more in young men. But as far as +sexuality is concerned — sexuality means thinking about sex — it is more in old men than +in young men. Death is coming near and sex is the antidote of death, so now the +weakening energy would like to produce someone. + +Life must continue. Life is not concerned with you, life is concerned with itself. This is a +vicious circle. + +And the same happens in the reverse order also. If you are overflowing with energy, sex +becomes less and less important and love becomes more and more important. And then +sex can happen just as a part of love, as a deep sharing. The deepest sharing can be of +bio-energy because that is the life force. To whomsoever you love you want to give +something. Giving is part of love; in love you give things. The greatest gift can be of the +life energy of yourself. In love, sex becomes a deep gift of bio-energy, of life. You are +giving a part of yourself. + +Really, in every act of sex you are giving yourself totally. Then a different circle is +created: the more you feel love, the more you become strong. The more you feel love, the +more you share love, then the more strong you become because in love the ego is +dissolved. In love you have to flow with life. + +You need not flow with life in politics. Rather, you will be a fool if you flow with life in +politics, because there you have to force yourself against life; only then can you rise in +politics. If you are doing business you will be a fool if you flow with life. You will be +nowhere, because you have to fight, you have to compete, you have to be violent. The +more violent and the more mad, the more you will succeed there. + +It is a struggle. + +Only in love is there no competition, no fight, no violence. You succeed in love only +when you surrender. So love is the only anti-worldly thing in the world, the only non- +worldly thing in the world. And if you are in love you will become more a whole, +undivided; more energy will be accumulated. The more the energy, the less will be the +sexuality. And a moment comes when the energy comes to a point where transformation +happens, and energy becomes awareness. Sex disappears, and only a loving kindness, a +compassion, remains. + +Buddha has a glow of loving compassion; this is sex energy transformed. But you cannot +achieve it through fight, because fight creates division and division makes you more +sexual. This is the insight of tantra - absolutely different from whatsoever you may have +been thinking about sex and brahmacharya. Only through tantra does a real +brahmacharya, a real purity and innocence, happen. But then it is not a result, it is a +consequence. It follows total acceptance. + +The second question: + +Question 2 + +MY MIND THINKS THAT IT IS ANXIOUS TO RECEIVE YOUR MESSAGE, YET + + + +TOWARD THE END I FIND MYSELF RESISTING AND GETTING TIRED. I +SUSPECT THAT IF I WERE OPEN SEXUALLY I WOULD ALLOW MYSELF TO +RECEIVE WITHOUT ANY CLOSING. IS THERE ANY CONNECTION BETWEEN +OPENING TO A MASTER AND OPENING UP IN SEX? MY BACKGROUND +GIVES A NEGATIVE AND PASSIVE MEANING TO SURRENDER. + +I KNOW I WILL NOT GO DEEPER UNLESS I AM ABLE TO OVERCOME THIS +NEGATIVITY THAT SEEMS TO BE ENGRAVED IN MY PSYCHE. IS +SURRENDER POSSIBLE WHEN THE OPPOSITE IS PLANTED SO DEEPLY? + +Yes, there is a connection between surrender and sex, because sex is the first surrender, a +biological surrender - which you can experience easily. What does surrender mean? It +means to be open, unafraid, vulnerable. It means allowing the other to enter you. +Biologically, naturally, sex is the basic experience where without any effort you allow +someone to enter you, or someone to be so deeply close to you that you are not annored +against him. You are not resisting, not holding yourself back, but you are flowing., +relaxed, not afraid, not thinking of the future, of the result, of the consequences, but just +being in the moment. Even if death occurs you will accept it. + +In deep love, lovers have always felt that this is the right moment to die. And if death +occurs, then even death can be welcomed in this moment. They are open — even for death +they are open. If you are open for life, you will be open for death. If you are closed for +life, you will be closed for death. + +Those who are afraid of death are basically afraid of life. They have not lived; that is why +they are so afraid of death. And the fear is natural. If you have not lived at all you are +bound to be afraid of death, because death will deprive you of the opportunity to live and +you have not lived yet. + +So if death comes, then when will you live ? + +One who has lived deeply is not afraid of death. He is fulfilled, and if death comes he can +welcome it, accept it. Now whatsoever life can give, life HAS given. Whatsoever can be +known in life, he has known it. Now he can move into death easily. He would like to +move into death so that he can know something unknown, something new. In sex, in +love, you are fearless. You are not fighting for something in the future; this very moment +is paradise, this very moment is eternal. + +But when I say this, I do not necessarily mean that you have experienced it through sex. + +If are afraid, resisting, then in sex you can have a biological release, a sexual release, but +you will not attain to the ecstasy tantra talks about. + +Wilhelm Reich says you have not known sex at all unless in sex you can attain a deep +orgasm. It is not only a release of sex energy, your whole body must become relaxed. +Then the sex experience is not localized at the sex center, but it spreads all over the body. +Your every cell is bathed in it, and you have a peak - a peak in which you are not a body. +If you cannot attain a peak in sex, a peak in which you are not a body, you have not +known sex at all. That is why Wilhelm Reich says a very paradoxical thing: he says sex is +spiritual. + +This is what tantra says, and the meaning is that in deep sex you will not be a body at all; +you will become just a spirit that is hovering. + +Your body will be left far behind; you will have forgotten it completely. It will be no +more. You will not be part of the material world, you will have become immaterial. Only + + + +then is there orgasm. That is what tantra says about SAMBHOG - intercourse. + +There comes a total relaxation, a feeling that now you are fulfilled, a feeling that there is +no need to desire anything. Unless this feeling happens to you in sex - this feeling of +desirelessness — you have not known sex at all. You may have produced children, but +that is easy - and a different thing. + +Only man can achieve this spirituality in sex; otherwise sex is just an animal instinct. But +when teachers, monks condemn sex, you nod your head that they are right. When tantra +says something it is difficult to believe in it because it is not your experience. That is why +tantra couldn’t become a universal message yet. But the future is good - because the more +man will become wise and understanding, the more tantra will be felt and understood. +Only within these hundred years has psychology laid foundations for a world which will +be tantric. But you nod your head with someone who is condemning sex because you also +have the same experience. You know that nothing happens in it, and after sex you feel +depressed. That is why there is so much condemnation. Everytime you move into it you +feel depressed, later on you repent. + + +Tantra, Wilhelm Reich, Freud and others who know, agree absolutely that if you achieve +an orgasm in sex the glow will last for hours afterwards and you will feel absolutely +different - without any worries, without any tensions. Euphoria will result, they say; +ecstasy will be there. And that ecstasy happens only when there is really a let-go - when +you are not holding yourself back, you are not fighting; you are just moving with the life +energy. + +Life energy has two layers, and it will be good to understand this. I was talking about +breath, and I told you that breath was something like a link between your voluntary +system and your non-voluntary system. In your body the major part is non-voluntary. The +blood circulates, and you are not asked to do anything. You cannot do anything, it just +goes on circulating. Only during these last three hundred years could man know that +blood circulates. Before that it was thought that blood just filled the body - not that it was +circulating, because you cannot feel its circulation. It goes on working without you, +without your knowledge. It is non-voluntary. + +You eat food; then the body starts working. Beyond your mouth you are not needed. The +moment food goes beyond your mouth the body takes it; the non-voluntary system goes +on working on it. And it is good that it works this way. If it were left to you, you would +create a mess. + +It is such a great work that if you had to do it you would not be able to do anything else. +If you had taken a cup of tea, it would be enough to keep you engaged the whole day - to +work it out, to transform it into blood. And the work is so much. + +The body works non-voluntarily, but there are a few things you can do voluntarily. I can +move my hand, but I cannot move the blood that moves in the hand. I cannot do anything +directly with the bone that moves in the hand. I cannot do anything with the system that +works, but I can move my hand. I can move my body, but I cannot do whatsoever goes +on within it, I cannot interfere. I can jump, I can run, I can sit, I can lie down, but inside I +cannot do anything. Just on the surface I am allowed freedom. + +Sex is a very mysterious phenomenon. You start it, but a moment comes when you are no +more. Sex is started as a voluntary thing, then there is a limit. If you cross that limit you +cannot come back; if you do not cross that limit you CAN come back. So sex is both + + + +voluntary and non-voluntary. There is a limit up to which your mind will be needed. But +if you do not lose your mind, your head, your reason, your consciousness, your religion, +your philosophy, your way of life, if you do not lose your mind, then the boundary will +not be crossed and you will be experiencing sex in the voluntary realm. + +This is what is happening. + +Then after sex you will feel depressed, against it - and you will be thinking of renouncing +life and taking a vow against sex. Of course, these vows will not go on for long. Within +twenty-four hours you will be okay and ready to move again into sex. But it becomes a +repetition and the whole thing seems futile. You accumulate energy, then you throw it — +and nothing results out of it. And this is a long boredom, a drab thing. That is why monks +and teachers who are against sex appeal to you: they are talking about something you can +understand. + +But you have not known the non-voluntary sex, - the deepest biological dimension. You +have not touched it, and you always come back from the limit because that limit creates +fear. Beyond that limit your ego will not be; beyond that limit you will not be. The sex +energy will take hold of you, it will possess you. Then you will be doing something +which you cannot control. + +Unless you can move to this uncontrolled phenomenon, you cannot achieve orgasm. And +once you know this uncontrolled life energy, you are no more in it. You have become just +a wave in a great ocean, and things are just happening. You are not forcing them to +happen. + +Really, you are not active — you have become passive. In the beginning you are active, +and then a moment comes when you become passive. And when you become passive, +only then does orgasm happen. + +If you have known it then you can understand many things. Then you can understand +religious surrender also. Then you can understand the surrender of a disciple to a master. +Then you can understand the surrender of someone to the existence itself. But if you do +not know any surrender it is difficult even to conceive of what it means. + +So it is right: sex is deeply related with surrender. If you have known deep sex you will +be more capable of surrendering, because you have known a deep pleasure that follows +surrender, you have kn own a bliss that comes as a shadow of surrender. Then you can +trust. + +Sex is biological surrender. SAMADHI — cosmic consciousness — is existential +surrender. Through sex you touch life. Through samadhi, ecstasy, you touch existence, +you move even deeper than life; the basic existence is touched. Through sex you move +from yourself to another person; in samadhi you move from yourself to the whole, to the +cosmos. + +Tantra is, if you will allow me, "cosmic sex"! It is a falling in love with the whole +cosmos, it is a surrender toward the whole cosmos. And you have to be passive. To a +limit you have to be active, but beyond that limit you are not needed; you are a hindrance +then. Then leave it to the life force, leave it to the existence. + +The second thing: if you go on thinking about surrender as negative and passive, nothing +is wrong in it. + +It IS passive and negative, but the negativity and the passivity is nothing condemnable. In +our minds, the moment we hear the word 'negative' some condemnation enters, the + + + +moment we hear 'passive' some condemnation enters - because for the ego both of these +are deaths. + +Nothing is wrong in being passive. Passivity is a way to be in deep contact with the +universe. And you cannot be active with it — that is the difference between religion and +science. Science is active with the universe, religion is passive with the universe. Science +is just like the male mind - active, violent, forcing; religion is a feminine mind - open, +passive, receptive. Receptivity is always passive. And truth is not to be created, it is to be +received. + +You are not going to create the truth. The truth is already there! You have to receive it. +You have to become the host and then the truth will become your guest. And a host has to +be passive. You have to be like a womb to receive it, but your mind is trained for activity +- to be active, to do something - and this is the realm where whatsoever you do will +become a hindrance. Do not do — just be! This is what passivity means: do not do +anything. Just be, and allow that which is already there to happen to you. You are not +needed creatively, actively, to do something. You are needed just to receive. Be passive; +do not interfere. Nothing is wrong with passivity. + + +Poetry happens when you are passive. Even the greatest discoveries of science have +happened in passivity. But the attitude of science is active. Even the greatest things in +science happen only when the scientist is passive, just waiting, not doing anything. And +religion is basically passive. + +What is Buddha doing when he is meditating? Our language, our tenns, give a false +impression. When we say Buddha is meditating, it appears, because of the tenns used, +that he is doing something. But meditation means not doing. If you are doing something, +nothing will happen. + +But all doing is just like sex: in the beginning you have to be active; then a moment +comes when activity ceases and you have to be passive. When I say "Buddha is +meditating," I mean Buddha is no more. He is not doing anything, he is just passive - a +host waiting, just waiting. And when you are waiting for the unknown, you cannot even +expect anything. You do not really know what is going to happen, because if you know +then the waiting becomes impure and the desire enters. You do not know anything! + +All that you had known has ceased, all the known has dropped. The mind is not +functioning, it is just simply awaiting, and then everything happens to you. The whole +universe falls into you; the whole universe enters from all sides into you. All the barriers +are withdrawn. You are not withholding yourself. + + +Nothing is wrong with passivity. Rather, your activity is the problem. But we are trained +for activity because we are trained for violence, struggle, conflict. And it is good as far as +it goes, because in the world you cannot be passive. In the world you have to be active, +fighting, forcing your way. But that which is so helpful in the world is not helpful when +you move toward a deeper existence. Then you have to reverse your steps. Be active if +you are moving in politics, in society, for riches or for power. Be inactive if you are +moving into God, into religion, into meditation. Passivity is the way there. + +And nothing is wrong about the negative either - nothing is wrong! 'Negative' only +means that something has to be dropped. For example, if I want to create space in this +room, what am I going to do? What is the process to create space? What am I going to + + + +do? Can I bring space from outside and fill this room? I cannot bring space from outside. +The space is already here — that is why it is a room — but it is filled with people or +furniture or things, so I take the things and people out of it. Then the space is discovered, +not brought. It was already here, but filled. So I do a negative process: I empty it. +Negativity means emptying yourself, not doing something positive, because that which +you are trying to discover is already there. Just throw out the furniture. + +Thoughts are the furniture in the mind. Just throw them out and the mind becomes a +space, and when the mind is a space it becomes your soul - your atman. But when it is +filled with thoughts, desires, it is mind; vacant, empty, it is not mind. Negation is a +process of elimination. Eliminate things... + +So do not be afraid of the words 'negative’ and 'passive’. If you are afraid, you can never +surrender. Surrender IS passive and negative. It is not something you are doing; rather, +you are leaving your doings, you are leaving the very notion that you can do. You cannot +do — this is the basic feeling. Only then is there surrender. It is negative because you are +moving into the unknown, the known is left. + +When you surrender to a master it is one of the miracles, because you do not know what +is going to happen and what this man is going to do to you. And you can never be certain +whether he is real or not. You cannot know to whom you are surrendering and where he +is going to lead you. You will try to make certain, but the very effort means that you are +not ready for surrender. + +If you are absolutely certain before you surrender that this man is going to lead you +somewhere - to a paradise - and then you surrender, it is not a surrender at all. You have +not surrendered. Surrender is always to the unknown. When everything is known, there is +no surrender. You have already checked that this is going to happen, and that two and +two are going to make four, then there is no surrender. + +You cannot say "I surrender" because the four is already made certain. + +In uncertainty, in insecurity, is the surrender. So it is easy to surrender to God because +really, there is no one to whom you are surrendering and you remain the master. It is +difficult to surrender to a living master because then you are no longer a master. With +God you can go on deceiving, because no one is going to ask you... + +I was reading a Jewish anecdote. One old man was praying to God, and he said, "My +neighbor 'A’ is very poor, and last year I prayed to you but you have not done anything +for him. My other neighbor 'B’ is crippled, and I prayed last year also, but you have not +done anything." And so on and so forth, he continued. He talked about all the neighbors, +and then in the end he said, "Now I will pray again this year. If you forgive me, I can also +forgive you." + +But he was talking alone. Every talk with the divine is a monologue; the other is not +there. So it is up to you; what you are doing is up to you, and you remain the master. That +is why there is so much insistence in tantra to surrender to a living master, because then +your ego is shattered. And that shattering is the base. That shattering is the base, and only +then something can arise out of it. + +But do not ask me what you can do to surrender. You cannot do anything. Or, you can do +only one thing: be aware of what you can do by doing, what you have gained by doing — +be aware! You have gained much: you have gained many miseries, anguishes, +nightmares. + + + +You have gained! That is what you have gained through your own effort, this is what ego +can gain. Be aware of it - of the misery that you have created - positively, actively, +without surrendering. Whatsoever you have done to your life, be aware of it. That very +awareness will help you one day to throw it all and to surrender. And remember that you +will be transformed not by surrender to a particular master, but by surrender itself. + +So the master is irrelevant; he is not the point. People go on coming to me and they say, + +"I want to surrender, but to whom?" That is not the point, you are missing the point. It is +not a question of to whom. Just the surrendering helps, not the person to whom you have +surrendered. He may not be there or he may not be authentic or he may not be an +enlightened one. He may just be a rogue; that is not the point. It is irrelevant! You have +surrendered — that helps because now you are vulnerable, open. You have become +feminine. The male ego is lost, and you have become a feminine womb. + +The person you have surrendered to may be bogus or he may not be. That is not the +point! You have surrendered; now something can happen to you. And many times it has +happened that even with a false master disciples have become enlightened. You may be +surprised, even with a false master disciples have become enlightened! + +It is reported of Milarepa that he went to a master and he surrendered. + +Milarepa was a very faithful man, very trusting, so when the master said, "You will have +to surrender to me, only then can I help," he said, "Okay, I surrender." But many persons +were jealous. The old followers of that master were jealous of Milarepa because Milarepa +was such a different type of man. He was a very magnetic force. They became afraid that +if this man remained there he would become the chief disciple, the next master. So they +said to their master, "This man seems to be false, so first check whether his surrender is +real." + +The master said, "How should we examine him?" They said, "Tell him to jump from this +hill" — they were sitting on a hill. So the master said, "Milarepa, if you have really +surrendered, jump from this hill." So he did not wait even to say yes, he jumped. The +disciples thought he would be dead; then they went down. It took hours for them to go to +the valley. He was just sitting under a tree meditating, and he was happy - as happy as he +had never been. + +So they gathered, and the disciples thought that it must be a coincidence. The master was +also surprised... how could this happen? So he asked Milarepa privately, "What did you +do? How did it happen?" He said, "When I surrendered, there was no question of MY +doing. YOU have done something." + +The master knew well that he had not done anything, so he tried again. One house was on +fire, so he told Milarepa to go in and sit there and only to come out when the whole house +had become ashes. + +Milarepa went in. He stayed there for hours, then the house was just ashes. When they +reached there he was just buried in the ashes - but as alive and as blissful as ever. +Milarepa touched his master's feet and said, "You are doing miracles." + +So the master said, "It is difficult to think that it is again a coincidence." But the +followers said, "This is nothing but a coincidence. Try again. At least three trials are +needed." + +They were passing through a village and the master said, "Milarepa, the boat has not yet +come and the ferryman has not kept his promise, so you go - walk on the water, go to the +other bank and tell the ferryman to come." Milarepa walked, and then the master really + + + +thought it was a miracle. He walked and went to the other bank and brought the ferry. + +The master said, "Milarepa, how are you doing it?" He said, "I just take your name and +go on. It is your name, master, that helps me." + +So the master thought, "If my name helps so much... " He tried to walk on the water also, +but he drowned - and no one has ever heard about him again. + +How did it happen? Surrender is the thing - not the master, not the thing to which you +surrender. The statue, the temple, the tree, the stone - anything will do. If you surrender, +you become vulnerable to the existence. Then the whole existence takes you into its +arms. + +This story may be just a parable, but the meaning is that when you surrender, the whole +existence is for you. + +The fire, the hill, the river, the valley - nothing is against you because you are not against +anything. The enmity is lost. + +If you fall from a hill and your bones are broken, it is the bones of your ego. You were +resisting; you didn’t allow the valley to help you. You were helping yourself. You were +thinking yourself more wise than the existence. Surrender means you come to realize that +whatsoever you do will be stupid, foolish. And you have done many stupid things for +many lives. + +Leave it to the existence itself. YOU cannot do anything! You have to realize that you are +helpless. This realization that "I am helpless" helps the surrender to happen. + +THE END. + + + +Chapter 31 : From sound to inner silence + + +21. SILENTLY INTONE A WORD ENDING IN "AH." THEN IN THE "HH," +EFFORTLESSLY, THE SPONTANEITY. + +22. STOPPING EARS BY PRESSING AND THE RECTUM BY CONTRACTING, +ENTER THE SOUND. + +23. ENTER THE SOUND OF YOUR NAME AND, THROUGH THIS SOUND, ALL +SOUNDS. + +Tantra is not a philosophy. Rather, it is a science with one difference: science is +objective, tantra is subjective. But still, it is a science and not a philosophy. Philosophy +thinks about the truth, the unknown, the ultimate; science tries to discover what is. +Science enters the immediate; philosophy thinks of the ultimate. Philosophy is always +looking toward the sky; science is more down to earth. + +Tantra is not concerned with the ultimate. It is concerned with the immediate, the here +and now. Tantra says, the ultimate is hidden in the immediate, so you need not worry +about the ultimate. By worrying about the ultimate you will miss the immediate, and the +ultimate is hidden in the immediate. So by thinking about the ultimate you will miss both. +If the immediate should be missed, because of it you will miss the ultimate also. So +philosophy is just smoke. The approach of tantra is scientific, but the OBJECT is +different from that of so-called science. + +Science tries to understand the object, the objective world, the reality that is before your +eyes. Tantra is the science of the reality that is behind your eyes, the subjectivity, but the +approach is scientific. + +Tantra doesn’t believe in thinking, it believes in experimenting, in experiencing. And +unless you can experience, everything is just a wastage of energy. + +I am reminded of one incident. Mulla Nasruddin was crossing a street. Just in front of a +church he was knocked down by a hit-and-run driver. He was an old man, and a crowd +gathered. Someone was saying that "That man cannot survive." The priest of the church +ran out. He came near and he found out that the old man was just going to die, so he +prepared to administer the last rites. He came near and asked the dying Mulla, "Do you +believe in God the Father? Do you believe in God the Son? Do you believe in God the +Holy Ghost?" Mulla opened his eyes and said, "My God! I am dying and he is asking me +puzzles!" + +All philosophy is like this: it is asking puzzles while you are dying. Every moment you +are dying, every moment everyone is on his deathbed - because death can occur at any +moment. But philosophy goes on asking and answering puzzles. Tantra says, it is good +for children to philosophize but those who are wise will not waste their time in +philosophy. They should try to know - not to think, because through thinking there is no +knowledge. Through thinking you go on webbing words, creating patterns of words. It +leads nowhere, you remain the same — no transformation, no new insights. The old man +just goes on gathering dust. + + +Knowing is a different phenomenon. It does not mean "thinking about," it means going +deep into the existence itself in order to know, moving into the existence. Remember this, + + + +that tantra is not a philosophy. It is science - a subjective science. The approach is +scientific and non-philosophic. It is very down to earth, concerned with the immediate. +The immediate is to be used as a door to the ultimate, the ultimate happens if you enter +the immediate. It is there, and there is no other way to reach to it. + +Philosophy is not a way in the eyes of tantra. It is a false way! It only appears that this is +a way. It is a door which is not; it simply appears to be a door. It is a false door. The +moment you try to enter it you come to know that you cannot enter, it is just a painted +door, there is no door in reality. Philosophy is a painted door. If you sit by its side and go +on thinking and thinking, it is good. If you try to enter it, it is a wall. + +So every philosophy is good for philosophizing. For experiencing, every philosophy is +impotent. That is why there is so much insistence on technique in tantra - SO MUCH +insistence on technique, because a science can do nothing but give technology, whether +of the outside world or of the inside. The very word 'tantra’ means technique. The very +word 'tantra’ MEANS technique! That is why, in this small and yet one of the greatest +and deepest books, only techniques are given, no philosophy, just one hundred and +twelve techniques to reach the ultimate through the immediate. + + +The ninth technique concerning sound: + +SILENTLY INTONE A WORD ENDING IN "AH." THEN IN THE ”HH,” +EFFORTLESSLY, THE SPONTANEITY. + +SILENTLY INTONE A WORD ENDING IN ’’AH ” Any word that ends in "AH” - +intone it silently. Emphasis should be given to the ending "AH." Why? Because the +moment this sound "AH" is intoned, your breath goes out. You may not have observed it, +but now you can observe: whenever your breath goes out you are more silent, and +whenever your breath comes in you are more tense - because the outgoing breath is death +and the incoming breath is life. Tension is part of life, not of death. Relaxation is part of +death; death means total relaxation. Life cannot be totally relaxed; it is impossible. + +Life means tension, effort. Only death is relaxed. So whenever a person becomes +absolutely relaxed, he is both - alive outwardly and dead within. You can see in the face +of a buddha both life and death simultaneously. That is why there is so much silence and +calm, they are part of death. Life is not relaxation. You relax in the night when you are +asleep. That is why the old traditions say that death and sleep are similar. Sleep is a +temporary death and death is permanent sleep. That is why night relaxes you, it is the +outgoing breath. The morning is the incoming breath. + +The day makes you tense and the night relaxes you. Light makes you tense, darkness +relaxes you. + +That is why you cannot sleep when there is light, it is difficult to relax because light is +similar to life: it is anti-death. Darkness is similar to death: it is pro-death. + +So darkness has deep relaxation in it, and those who are afraid of darkness cannot relax... +impossible, because every relaxation is dark. And darkness surrounds your life on both +the sides. Before you are born you are in darkness; when life ceases you are again in +darkness. Darkness is infinite, and this light and this life is just a moment in it, just a +wave arising and then falling back. If you can remember the darkness that surrounds both +the ends, you will be relaxed here and now. + +Life, death - they both are two sides of existence. The incoming breath is life, the + + + +outgoing breath is death. So it is not that you die someday, you are dying with every +breath. That is why the Hindus have been counting life in breaths, they do not count life +in years. Tantra, yoga, all the old Indian systems, they count life in breaths: how many +breaths you are going to live. So they say if you breathe very fast, with too much +breathing in a short time, you will die very soon. If you breathe very slowly and your +breaths are less in an interval, you will live very long. And this is so. + +If you go and observe animals, those animals whose breathing is very slow live long. + +Take the elephant: the elephant lives long; the breath is very slow. + +Then there is the dog: the dog dies soon; the breath is very fast. Whenever you find an +animal in which the breath is fast, any animal, the animal will not have a long life. A long +life is always with slow breath. + +Tantra and yoga and other Indian systems count your life in breaths. Really, with every +breath you are born and with every breath you are dying. This mantra, this technique, +uses the outgoing breath as the method, the medium, the vehicle, to go deep into silence. +It is a death method. INTONE SILENTLY A WORD ENDING IN "AH." The breath has +gone — that is why a word ending in "AH." + +This AH is meaningful because when you say AH it completely empties you. The whole +breath has moved out; nothing remains within. You are totally empty - empty and dead. +For a single moment, for a very small interval, life has moved out of you. You are dead - +empty. This emptiness, if realized, if you can become aware of it, will change you +completely. You will be a different man. + +Then you will know well that this life is not your life and this death is also not your +death. Then you will know something which is beyond the incoming and outgoing breath +- the witnessing soul. And this witnessing can happen easily when you are empty of +breath, because life has subsided and with it all tensions have subsided. So try it, it is a +very beautiful method. But the ordinary process, the ordinary habit, is to emphasize the +incoming breath, never the outgoing breath. + + +We always take the breath in. We ALWAYS take it in, but we never throw it out. We +take it in and THE BODY throws it out. Observe your breathing and you will know. We +take it in. We never exhale, we only inhale. The exhaling is done by the body because we +are afraid of death, that is the reason. If it was in our power we would not exhale at all, +we would inhale and then control it within. No one emphasizes exhaling — inhaling is +emphasized. Because we HAVE to do exhaling after inhaling, that is why we go on +"suffering" it. We tolerate it because we cannot inhale without exhaling. + +So exhaling is accepted as a necessary evil, but basically we are not interested in +exhaling. And this is not only about breath, this is our whole attitude toward life. We +cling to everything that comes to us; we will not leave it. This is the miserliness of the +mind. + +And remember, there are many implications in it. If you are suffering from constipation, +this will be the basic cause: you always inhale and never exhale. The mind which never +exhales but just inhales will suffer from constipation. The constipation is the other end of +the same thing. He cannot exhale anything, he goes on accumulating, he is afraid. The +fear is there. He can only accumulate, but anything that is accumulated becomes +poisonous. + +If you only inhale and do not exhale, your very breath becomes poison to you; you will + + + +die because of it. + + +You can turn a life-giving force into poison if you behave in a miserly way, because the +exhaling is absolutely necessary. It throws all the poisons out of you. + +So really, death is a purifying process and life is a poisoning process. This will look +paradoxical. Life is a poisoning process because to live you have to use many things - +and the moment you have used them they turn into poison, they are converted into +poisons. You take a breath in, you use oxygen, and then what remains becomes poison. It +was life only because it was oxygen, but you have used it. So life goes on changing +everything into a poison. + +Now there is a great movement in the West - ecology. Man has been using everything +and turning it into poison, and the very Earth is just on the verge of dying. Any day it can +die because we have turned everything into poison. Death is a purifying process. When +your whole body has become poisonous, death will relieve you of the body. It will renew +you, it will give you a new birth; a new body will be given to you. Through death all the +accumulated poisons are dissolved back into nature. You are given a new mechanism. +And this happens with every breath. The outgoing breath is similar to death — it takes +poisons out. And when it is going out, everything ebbs within. If you can throw the +whole breath out, completely out so that no breath remains within, you touch a point of +silence that can never be touched while the breath is in. + + +It is just like the ebb and tide: with every breath a tide of life comes to you; with every +exhalation, everything ebbs - the tide has gone. You are just a vacant, empty shore. This +is the use of this technique. SILENTLY INTONE A WORD ENDING IN "AH." +Emphasize the exhaling breath. And you can use it for many changes in the mind. If you +are suffering from constipation, forget intaking. Just exhale and do not inhale. Let the +body do the work of inhaling; you just do the work of exhaling. You force the breath out +and do not inhale. The body will inhale by itself; you need not worry about it, you are not +going to die. The body will take breath in, you just throw it out and let the body take it in. +Your constipation will go. + +If you are suffering from heart disease, just exhale, do not inhale. Then you will not +suffer from heart disease. If while just going upwards on a staircase, or anywhere, you +feel tired - very much tired, suffocated, breathless - simply do this: just exhale, do not +inhale. Then you can climb up any amount of steps and you will not be tired. What +happens? When you go with an emphasis on exhaling, you are ready to let go, you are +ready to die. You are not afraid of death; that makes you open. Otherwise you are closed +— fear closes you. + +When you exhale, the whole system changes and accepts death. There is no fear, you are +ready to die. And one who is ready to die can live. + +Really, only one who is ready to die can live. He alone becomes capable of life - because +he is not afraid. + +One who accepts death, welcomes it, receives it as a guest, lives with it, goes deep into +life. Exhale, do not inhale, and that will change your total mind. Because of simple +techniques tantra never appeals, because we think, "My mind is such a complex thing." It +is not complex - just foolish. And fools are very complex. A wise man is simple. Nothing +is complex in your mind, it is a very simple mechanism. If you understand, you can + + + +change it very easily. + +If you have not seen anybody dying, if you have been protected from seeing death as +Buddha was protected, you cannot understand anything about it. Buddha's father was +afraid because some astrologer said that "This boy is going to be a great sannyasin. He +will renounce the world." The father asked, "What is to be done to protect him from +doing such a thing?" So those astrologers thought and thought, and then they concluded +and they said, "Do not allow him to see death, because if he is not aware of death he will +never think of renouncing life." + +This is beautiful - very meaningful. That means all religion, all philosophy, all tantra and +yoga, is basically death-oriented. If you are aware of death, only then does religion +become meaningful. That is why no animal except man is religious, because no animal is +aware of death. + +They die, but they are not aware. They cannot conceive or imagine that there is going to +be death. + +When one dog dies, other dogs never imagine that death is going to happen to them also. +Always someone else dies, so how can a dog imagine that "I am going to die"? He has +never seen himself dying. Someone else, some other dog dies, so how can he connect that +"I am going to die"? No animal is aware of death; that is why no animal renounces. No +animal can become a sannyasin. Only a very high quality of consciousness can lead you +to renounce - when you become aware of death. And if even by being a man you are not +aware of death, you belong to the animal kingdom; you are not yet a man. You become a +man only when you encounter death. Otherwise there is no difference between you and +the animal. + +Everything is similar; only death makes the difference. With death encountered, you are +no more animal, something has happened to you which never happens to an animal. Now +you will be a different consciousness. + +So Buddha’s father protected him from seeing any type of death - not only man’s death, +but the death of animals and even of flowers. So the gardeners were instructed not to +allow the child to see a dead flower, a pale flower dying on the branch, a pale leaf, a dry +leaf. No, nowhere should he come to realize that something dies — he may infer from it +that "I am going to die." + +And you do not infer it even seeing your wife dying, your mother, your father, your child. +You weep for them, but you never conceive that this is a sign that "I am going to die." + +But the astrologers said, "The boy is very, very sensitive, so protect him from any type of +death." And the father was over-conscientious He would not allow even an old man or an +old woman to be seen, because oldness is just death heard from a distance; death is there +from a distance, just coming. So Buddha's father would not allow any old man or old +woman to be seen by the child. If Buddha suddenly became aware that just by stopping +the breath a man could die, it would be very difficult for him. "Just because no breath is +coming in, how can a man die?" he would wonder. "Life is such a big, complex process." +If you have not seen anyone dying, even you cannot conceive that just by stopping the +breath a man will die. Just by stopping the breath? Such a simple thing! And how can +such a complex life die? + +It is the same with these methods. They look simple, but they touch the basic reality. +When the breath is going out, when you are completely emptied of life, you touch death: +you are just near it, and everything becomes calm and silent within you. + + + +Use it as a mantra. Whenever you feel tired, whenever you feel tense, use any word +which ends in "AH." "Allah" will do - any word that brings your total breath out so that +you exhale completely and you are emptied of breath. + +The moment you are emptied of breath you are emptied of life also. And all your +problems belong to life: no problem belongs to death. Your anxiety, your anguish, your +anger, your sadness, they all belong to life. + +Death is non-problematic. Death never gives any problem to anyone. And even if you +think that "I am afraid of death and death creates a problem," it is not death that creates +the problem but your clinging to life. Only life creates problems; death dissolves all +problems. So when the breath has moved completely out, "AH," you are emptied of life. +Look within at that moment when the breath is completely out. Before taking another +breath in, go deep down in that interval and become aware of the inside calm, the silence. +In that moment you are a buddha. + +If you can catch that moment, you have known a taste of what Buddha might have +known. And once known, you can detach this taste from the incoming-outgoing breath. +Then the breath can go on coming in, going out, and you can remain in that quality of +consciousness that you have come to know. It is always there; one has just to discover it. +And it is easier to discover when life is emptied out. + +SILENTLY INTONE A WORD ENDING IN "AH." THEN IN THE "HH," +EFFORTLESSLY, THE SPONTANEITY. And when the breath goes out, "HH," +everything is emptied. EFFORTLESSLY : in this moment, there is no need to make any +effort. + +The SPONTANEITY : just be aware, be spontaneous, be sensitive, and realize this +moment of death. + +In this moment you are just near the door, just near the door!- very, very near to the +ultimate. The immediate has moved out, the superfluous has moved out. In this moment +you are not the wave: you are the ocean - just near, just near! If you can become aware +you will forget that you are a wave. Again the wave will come, but now you can never be +identified with it, you will remain the ocean. Once you have kn own that you are the +ocean, you can never again be the wave. + +Life is waves... death is the ocean. That is why Buddha so much insists about his +NIRVANA that it is death-like. He never says you will attain life immortal, he says you +will simply die totally. Jesus says, "Come to me and I will give you life, and life +abundant." Buddha says, "Come to me to realize your death. I will give you death +totally." And both mean the same thing, but Buddha’s terminology is more basic. But you +will become afraid of it. That is why Buddha had no appeal in India; he was uprooted +completely. And we go on saying that this land is a religious land, but the most religious +person couldn’t get roots here. + +What type of religious land is this? We have not produced another Buddha; he is +incomparable. And whenever the world thinks India to be religious, the world remembers +Buddha - no one else. + +Because of Buddha, India is thought to be religious. What type of religious land is this? +Buddha has no roots here; he was totally uprooted. He used the language of death - that is +the cause, and brahmins were using the language of life. They say THE BRAHMAN and +he says NIRVANA: 'Brahman' means life — life, infinite life; and 'Nirvana’ means just + + + +cessation, death - total death. + +Buddha says, "Your ordinary death is not total; you will be born again. It is NOT total! +You will be bom again! I will give you a total death, and you will never be born again." + +A total death means now no birth is possible. So this so-called death, Buddha says, is not +death. It is just a rest period, you will become alive again. It is just a breath gone out. + +You will take the breath in again, you will be reborn. Buddha says, "I will give you the +way so that the breath will go out and will never come in again - total death, nirvana, +cessation." + +We become afraid because we cling to life. But this is the paradox: the more you cling to +life, the more you will die, and the more you are ready to die, then the more you become +deathless. If you are ready to die, then there is no possibility of death. No one can give +you death if you accept it, because through that acceptance you become aware of +something within you which is deathless. + +This incoming breath and outgoing breath are the life and death of the body, not of "me." + +But "I" do not know anything other than the body; "I" am identified with the body. Then +it will be difficult to be aware when the breath comes in, easy to be aware when the +breath goes out. When the breath is going out, for that moment you have become old, +dying, emptied completely of the breath; you are dead for a moment. + +IN THE "HH," EFFORTLESSLY, THE SPONTANEITY. Try it! Any moment you can +try it. Just riding in a bus or traveling in a train or moving to the office, whenever you +have time intone a sound like "Allah" - any sound ending with "AH." This "Allah" helped +so much in Islam - not because of any Allah there in the sky, but because of this "AH." +This word is beautiful. And then the more one goes on using this word "Allah, Allah..." it +becomes reduced. Then what remains is "Lah, Lah..." Then it is reduced further; then it +remains as "Ah, Ah..." It is good, but you can use any word that ends in "AH" - or just +"AH" will do. + +Have you observed that whenever you are tense you will sigh — "AH" — and you will feel +relaxed. Or whenever you are in joy, overjoyed, you say "AH," and the whole breath is +thrown out and you feel within a tranquility that you have never felt. Try this: when you +are feeling very good, take the breath in and then see what you feel. Y ou cannot feel that +well-being that comes with "AH." It is coming because of the breath. + +So languages differ, but these two things never differ. + +All over the world, whenever someone feels tired he will say "AH." Really, he is calling +for death to come and relax him. Whenever one feels overjoyed, blissful, he says "AH." +He is so overfilled with joy that he is not afraid of death now. He can relieve himself +completely, relax completely. + +And what will happen if you go on trying it, trying it? You will become fully aware of +something within you - the spontaneousness of your being; of SAHAJ of being +spontaneous. That you are already, but you are too much engaged with life, too much +occupied with life. You cannot become aware of the being which is behind. + +When you are not occupied with life, with the incoming breath, the being behind is +revealed; there is a glimpse. But the glimpse will become, by and by, a realization. And +once it is known you cannot forget it - and this is not something which you are creating. +That is why it is spontaneous: it is not something you are creating. It is there, you have +simply forgotten. It is a remembrance! It is a rediscovery! + +Try to see children, very small children, taking their breaths. They take them in a + + + +different way. Look at a child sleeping. His belly comes up and down, not the chest. If +you are sleeping and you are being observed, your chest comes up and down; your breath +never goes down to the belly. The breath can go down to the belly only if you exhale and +do not inhale. + +If you inhale and do not exhale, the breath cannot go down to the belly. The reason why +breath goes to the belly is that when one exhales, the whole breath is thrown out and then +the BODY takes it in. And the body takes only that amount which is needed — never +more, never less. + +The body has its own wisdom, and it is more wise than you. Do not disturb it. You can +take more — then it will be disturbed. You can take less — then it will be disturbed. The +body has its own wisdom, it only takes that amount which is needed. When more is +needed, it creates the situation. When less is needed, it creates the situation. It never goes +to the extreme, it is always balanced. But if YOU inhale it is never balanced, because you +do not know what you are doing, you do not know what is the need of the body. And the +need changes every moment. + +Allow the body! You just exhale, you just throw it out, and then the body will take breath +in - and it will take it deeply and slowly, and the breath will go down to the belly. It will +hit the navel point exactly and your belly will go up and down. If you inhale then really, +you never exhale totally. Then the breath is in and you go on inhaling, so the breath +which is already in will not allow your breath to go down to the very bottom. Then just +shallow breathing happens. You go on taking breath in, and the poisonous breath is there, +fdling you up. + + +They say that you have six thousand sacs in your lungs and only two thousand are +touched by your breath. The four thousand are always fdled with poisonous gases which +need to be exhaled, and that two-thirds portion of your chest creates much anxiety, much +anguish and misery in the mind, in the body. A child exhales, he never inhales. Inhaling +is done by the body itself. + +When the child is born, the first thing he is going to do is cry. With that cry his throat +opens, with that cry comes the first "AH." The oxygen and air that had been given by the +mother is exhaled. This is his first effort with breathing. That is why if a child is not +crying, then the doctor will become uneasy, because he has not shown the sign of life. He +still feels dependent on the mother. He must cry! That cry shows that now he is becoming +an individual; the mother is not needed, he will take his own breath. And the first thing is +that he is going to cry in order to exhale that which was given by the mother, and then his +body will start functioning, inhaling. + +A child is always exhaling, and when the child starts inhaling, when the emphasis moves +to inhaling, be aware. He has already become old; he has learned things from you. He has +become tense. Whenever you are tense, you cannot take a deep breath. Why? Your +stomach becomes rigid. Whenever you are tense your stomach becomes rigid, it won’t +allow breath to go down. + +Then you have to take shallow breaths. + +Try with "AH." It has a beautiful feeling around it. Whenever you feel tired, "AH" — +throw the breath. And make it a point to emphasize exhaling. You will be a different +man, and a different mind will evolve. With the emphasis on breathing in, you have + + + +developed a miser mind and a miser body. With exhaling, that miserliness will disappear +and with it many problems. Possessiveness will disappear. + +So tantra will not say leave possessiveness. Tantra says, change your system of +breathing; you cannot possess then. Observe your own breathing and your moods, and +you will become aware. Whatsoever is wrong is always associated with the emphasis that +is given to the incoming breath and whatsoever is good, virtuous, beautiful, true, is +always associated with exhaling. Whenever you are speaking a lie, you will hold your +breath in. Whenever you speak truth, you never hold the breath. You fear that "I am +speaking a lie," so you hold the breath. You are afraid something may go out with it - the +out-moving breath. Your hidden truth may be revealed, so you are afraid. + +Go on trying this "AH" more and more. You will be more healthy in body, more healthy +in mind, and a different quality of calm, at-easeness, tranquillity will develop. + +The tenth sound method: + +STOPPING EARS BY PRESSING AND RECTUM BY CONTRACTING, ENTER THE +SOUND. + + +We are not aware of the body even or how the body functions and what is its tao, what is +its way. But if you observe, then you can become very easily aware. If you stop your ears +and pull your rectum up, contract your rectum, everything will stop for you. It will be as +if the whole world has become non-moving - as if everything has become static, stopped. +Not only movements, you will feel as if time has stopped. + +What happens when you pull the rectum up, contract it? What happens? When both the +ears are closed simultaneously, with closed ears you will hear a sound within. But if the +rectum is not pulled up, that sound is released by the rectum. That sound is very subtle. If +the rectum is pulled up, contracted, and the ears are closed, you will see within you a +pillar of sound - and that sound is of silence. It is a negative sound. When all sounds have +ceased, then you feel the sound of silence or the sound of soundlessness. But it will be +released from the rectum. + +So close the ears and pull the rectum up. Then you are closed from both the sides, and +your body becomes closed and just filled with sound. This feeling of being filled with +sound gives a deep fulfillment. So we will have to understand many things around it, only +then will it become possible for you to have the feeling of what happens. + +We are not aware of the body — that is one of the basic problems for a seeker. + +And the society is against becoming aware of the body because society is afraid of the +body. So we train every child not to be aware of the body, we make every child +insensitive. We create a distance between the child's mind and body, so he is not very +much aware of the body, because body awareness will create problems for the society. +Many things are implied. If the child is aware of the body, he will become aware of sex +sooner or later. And if he is too much aware of the body, he will feel too much sexual, +sensuous. So we have to kill the very root. He should be "made dull" about his body, +insensitive, so he never feels it. You do not feel your body. You feel it only when +something wrong happens, when something goes wrong. + +You have a headache in the head, then you feel your head. Some thorn is there, then you +feel your leg, your feet. When your body aches, you feel that you have a body. You feel it +only when something goes wrong, and then too not right away. You are never aware of + + + +your diseases immediately. You become aware only when a period has passed and when +the disease goes on knocking at your consciousness that, "I am here." Only then do you +become aware. So no one really goes to the doctor in time. Everyone reaches there late, +when the disease has entered deep and has done much wrong. + +If a child has grown up with sensitivity he will become aware of the disease even before +the disease happens. + +And now, in Russia particularly, they are working on the theory that a disease can be +known even six months before its happening if someone is very deeply sensitive about +his body, because subtle changes start long in advance. They prepare the body for the +disease. The impact is felt even six months before. + +But never mind disease, we never become aware even of death! If you are going to die +tomorrow, you are not aware even today. A thing like death which may happen the next +moment, and you are not aware this moment. You are totally dead to your body, +insensitive. This whole society, the whole culture up to now, creates this dullness, this +deadness, because it has been against the body. You are not allowed to feel it. Only in +accidents can you be pardoned, forgiven for being aware of it; otherwise "do not be +aware of the body." + +This creates many problems, particularly for tantra, because tantra believes in deep +sensitivity and knowledge of the body. You go on moving and your body goes on doing +many things and you are unaware. Now much work is being done on body language. The +body has its own language, and psychiatrists and psychologists and psychoanalysts in +particular are being trained for body language, because they say you cannot believe the +modern man. Whatsoever he says cannot be believed. Rather, one must observe his body, +that will give a more true clue. + + +A man enters a psychiatrist's office. The old psychiatry, Freudian psychoanalysis, will +talk and talk with the man to bring out whatsoever is hidden in his mind. Modern +psychiatry will observe his body because that gives clues. If a man is an egoist, if ego is +his problem, he stands in a different way than a humble man. His neck has a different +angle than a humble man, his spine is not flexible but dead, fixed. He looks wooden, not +alive. If you touch his body it has a wooden feeling, not the warmth of a living body. He +is like a soldier just moving to the front. + +Look at the soldier moving to the front. He has a wooden shape, a wooden feeling, and +that is needed by a soldier because he is going to die or to kill. He must not be much +aware of the body, so his whole training is to create a wooden body. Soldiers marching +look like toys, like dead toys marching. + +If you are humble you have a different body; you sit differently you stand differently. If +you feel inferior, you stand differently; if you feel superior you stand differently. If you +are always in fear, you stand in such a way as if you are protecting yourself from some +unknown force. That is always there. If you are not afraid, you are just like a child +playing with his mother; there is no fear. Wherever you go you are unafraid, at home +with the universe around you. The man who is afraid is armored. + +And when I say armored it is not only symbolically, physiologically he is annored. +Wilhelm Reich was working very much on body structure, and he came to see some deep +associations between mind and body. If a man is afraid, his stomach is not flexible. You + + + +touch his stomach and it is like a stone. If he becomes fearless, his stomach relaxes +immediately. Or if you relax the stomach, then the fear disappears. Massage the stomach +to relax, and you will feel more fearless, less afraid. + +A person who is loving has a different quality of body and warmth — he is warm bodily. +A person who is not loving is cold, physiologically he is cold. Cold and other things have +moved into your body and they have become barriers, they do not allow you to know +about your body. But the body goes on working in its own way and you go on working in +your own way — a rift is created. That rift has to be broken. + +I have seen that if someone is suppressive, if you have suppressed your anger, then your +fingers, your hands, have the sensation of a suppressed anger. And a person who knows +how to feel it can feel just by touching your hand that you have suppressed anger. And +why in the hand? Because anger has to be released by the hands. If you have suppressed +anger then in your teeth, in your gums, it is suppressed - and it can be felt by touching. It +gives a vibration that "I am suppressed here." + + +If you have suppressed sex, then in your erotic zones it is there. If a person has +suppressed sex, then if you touch his erotic zones you can feel it. With any erotic zone +touched, sex is there if it has been suppressed. The zone will become afraid and will +withdraw from your touch, it will not be open. Because the person inside is withdrawing, +the part of the body will withdraw. It will not allow you to bring about an opening. + +Now they say that fifty percent of women are frigid, and the reason is because we teach +girls to be more suppressive than boys. So they have suppressed, and when a girl +suppresses her sexual feelings up to the age of twenty, it has become a long habit - +twenty years of suppression. Then when she will love, she will talk about love, but her +body will not be open; the body will be closed. And then an opposite, a diametrically +opposite phenomenon happens: two currents oppose each other. She wants to love but her +body is repressive, the body withdraws; it is not ready to come closer. + +If you see a woman sitting with a man, if the woman loves the man she will be inclining +toward him, the body will be inclining. If they are sitting on a sofa, both of their bodies +will be inclining toward each other. They are not aware, but you can see it. If the woman +is afraid of the man, her body will be inclining to the opposite direction. If a woman loves +a man she will never cross her legs when sitting near him. + +If she is afraid of the man she will cross her legs. She is not aware; this is not done +consciously. It is body annor. The body protects itself and works in its own ways. + +Tantra became aware of this phenomenon; the first awareness of such deep body feeling, +sensitivity, was with tantra. And tantra says that if you can use your body consciously, +the body becomes the vehicle to move to the spirit. Tantra says, it is foolish, absolutely +idiotic, to be against the body. Use it! It is a vehicle! And use its energy in such a way +that you can go beyond it. + +Now, STOPPING EARS BY PRESSING AND RECTUM BY CONTRACTING, + +ENTER THE SOUND. Many times you have been contracting the rectum and sometimes +the rectum is released even without your consciousness. If you suddenly become afraid, +the rectum is released. You may defecate in fear, you may urinate in fear. Then you +cannot control it. If a sudden fear grips you, your bladder will relax, your rectum will +relax. What happens? In fear, what happens? Fear is a mental thing, so why do you +urinate in fear? Why is the control lost? There must be some deep connecting root. + + + +Fear happens in the head, in the mind. When you are unafraid this never happens. The +child really has no mental control over his body. No animal controls his urine, bladder or +anything. Whenever the bladder is full it is released. No animal controls it, but man has +to control it of necessity. + +So we force a child to control when he should go to the bathroom and when not. We tell +him he has to control; we give timings. So the mind takes over the control of a function +which is non-voluntary. That is why it is so difficult to train the child for the toilet. And +now psychologists say that if we stop toilet training, humanity will very much improve. +Toilet training is the first repression of the child and its natural spontaneity, but it seems +difficult to listen to these psychologists. We cannot listen to them because then the +children will create many problems. We have to train them of necessity. Only a very, +very rich, affluent society will be able not to bother. Poor societies have to manage. We +cannot afford it. If the child urinates anywhere, we cannot afford it. If he urinates on the +sofa we cannot afford it, so we have to train. This training is mental. The body really has +no built-in program for it. The body has NO built-in program for it! + +Man is an animal as far as body is concerned, and the body knows no culture, no society. +That is why when you are in deep fear, the control mechanism that you have imposed on +the body is relaxed. You are not in control; you are thrown off control. You can control +only in nonnal conditions. In emergencies you cannot control because for emergencies +you have never been trained. You have only been trained for the normal, day-to-day, +routine world. + +In an emergency the control is lost, your body starts functioning in its own animal way. +But one relationship can be understood, that with a fearless man this will never happen. +So this has become a sign of a coward. + +If in fear you urinate or defecate, this shows you are a coward. A fearless man will not +behave in this way, because a fearless man is taking deep breaths. His body and his +breathing system are related; there is no gap. With a man who is a coward there is a gap, +and because of that gap he is always overburdened with urine and defecation. So +whenever an emergency comes, that overburdenedness has to be thrown: he has to be +unburdened. And it has a reason in nature. A coward who is unburdened can escape more +easily with his stomach relaxed, can run more easily. A burdened stomach will become a +hindrance, so it is helpful for a coward to be relaxed. + +Why am I talking about this? I am just saying this, that you have to be aware of your +mental processes and your stomach processes; they are deeply related. Psychologists say +that fifty to ninety percent of your dreams are because of your stomach processes. If you +have taken a very heavy meal you are bound to see nightmares. They are not related with +the mind, it is just that the heavy stomach creates them. + +Many dreams can be created by outside tricks. If you are sleeping, your hands can be +crossed on your chest and immediately you will start dreaming some nightmare. + +A pillow can be put on your chest and you will dream that some demon is sitting on your +chest just going to kill you. And this has been one of the problems. Why is there such a +burden from the small weight of a pillow? If you are awake, there is no weight; you do +not feel anything heavy. But why is it that a small pillow placed on you in the night when +you are sleeping is felt as being so heavy that it is as if you have been burdened with a +big stone or a rock? Why is so much weight felt? + + + +The reason is this: when you are aware, when you are awake, your mind and body are not +correlated; the gap is there. You cannot feel the body and its sensitivity. While asleep, the +control, the culture, the conditioning, dissolves; you have again become a child and your +body has become sensitive. Because of that sensitivity, a small pillow is felt as a rock. It +is magnified because of sensitivity — the sensitivity magnifies it. So body-mind processes +are deeply related, and if you know what happens you can use this. + +Rectum closed, pulled upwards, contracted, creates a situation in the body in which +sound can be felt if present. You will feel a pillar of sound in silence within the closed +space in your body. Close the ears and pull up the rectum, and then just remain with what +is happening inside you. Just remain in that vacant state which is created by these two +things. Your life energy is moving within and it has no way to go out. + +Sound goes out either from your ears or from your rectum. Those are the two doors from +where the sound can move out. If is not moving out, you can feel it more easily. + +And what will happen when you feel this inner sound? With the very phenomenon of +hearing the inner sound, your thoughts dissolve. Just try it anytime during the day: just +pull up the rectum and put your fingers in the ears. Press the ears and pull up the rectum. +You will feel that your mind has stopped. It will not be functioning; thoughts will have +stopped. That constant flow of thoughts is not there. It is good! And if one goes on doing +it whenever there is time, in the day if you can do it for five or six times, within three or +four months you will become an expert in it. And then such a well-being flows out of it! +And the inner sound, once heard, remains with you. Then you can hear it the whole day. +The market is noisy, the road is noisy, the traffic is noisy, but if even in that noise you +have heard the inner sound, you will feel the still small voice that goes on inside. And +then nothing will disturb you. If you can feel your inner sound, then nothing from the +outside can disturb you. Y ou remain silent; whatsoever happens around you makes no +difference. + +The last sound technique: + +ENTER THE SOUND OF YOUR NAME AND, THROUGH THIS SOUND, ALL +SOUNDS. + +Your own name can be used as a mantra very easily, and it is very helpful because your +name has gone very deep into your unconscious. + +Nothing else has gone so deep. If we are all are sitting here, and we all fall asleep and +someone comes and calls "Ram," no one will listen except the person whose name is +Ram. He will listen to it; he will be disturbed in his sleep. No one else will listen to the +sound "Ram," but why does this man listen? It has gone down deep; it is not conscious +now, it has become unconscious. + +Your name has gone very deep within you, but there is a very beautiful phenomenon +about your name: you never call it, others call it. Others use it; you never use it. + +I have heard that in the first world war, for the first time in America rationing was +created. Thomas Edison was a very great scientist, but he was very poor so he had to +stand in the queue for his ration card. And he was such a great man that no one ever used +his name before him. There was no need to use his name for himself, and no one else +would use his name because he was so much respected. Everyone would call him +Professor, so he had forgotten what was his name. + +He was standing in the queue, and when his name was called, when it was asked who + + + +Thomas Alva Edison was, he just stared blankly. Again the name was called, then +someone who was a neighbor to Edison said to him, "Why are you standing? Your name +is being called. It is your name, Professor." Then he became aware and he said, "But how +can I recognize it? No one calls me Edison. + +It has been so long... they just call me Professor." + +You never use your own name. Only others use it — you have heard it used by others. But +it has gone deep, very deep. It has penetrated like an arrow into your unconscious. If you +yourself use it, then it becomes a mantra. And for two reasons it helps: one, when you use +your own name, if your name is "Ram" and you use "Ram, Ram, Ram...", suddenly you +feel as if you are using someone else's name - as if it is not yours. Or if you feel that this +IS yours, you feel that there is a separate entity within you which is using it. It may +belong to the body, it may belong to the mind, but he who is calling "Ram, Ram..." +becomes a witness. + +You have always called others' names. When you call your own name it looks as if it +belongs to someone else, not to you, and it is a very revealing phenomenon. You can +become a witness to your own name, and with the name your whole life is involved. +Separated from the name, you are separated from your whole life. And this name has +penetrated deep within you because everyone has called you this from your very birth, +you have always heard this. So use this sound, and with this sound you can go to the very +depths to which the name has gone. + +In the old days we gave everyone a name of God - everyone. Someone was Ram, +someone was Narayan, someone was Krishna, someone was Vishnu, or something like +that. + +They say all the Mohammedan names are the names of God - ALL the Mohammedan +names! And all over the world that was the practice, to give a name which is really a +name of God. + +This was for good reasons. One reason was this technique — because if your name can be +used as a mantra it will serve you a double purpose. It will be YOUR name - and you +have heard it so much, so many times, and all your life it has penetrated deep. Then also, +it is the name of God. So go on repeating it inside, and suddenly you will become aware +that "This name is different from me." Then by and by this name will have a sanctity of +its own. You will remember any day that "Narayan" or "Ram," this is God's name. Your +name has turned into a mantra. + +Use it! This is very good! You can try many things with your name. If you want to be +awakened at five o’clock in the morning, no alarm is so exact as your own name. Just +repeat thrice inside, "Ram, you have to be awake by five o’clock sharp." Repeat it three +times, and then just fall asleep. You will be awakened at five o'clock because "Ram," +YOUR name, is very deep in the unconscious. + +Call your name and tell yourself that "At five o'clock in the morning, let me be +awakened." Someone WILL awaken you. And if you continue this practice, one day you +will suddenly realize that at five o'clock someone calls you and says, "Ram, be awake." +That is your unconscious calling you. + + +This technique says, ENTER THE SOUND OF YOUR NAME AND, THROUGH THIS +SOUND, ALL SOUNDS. Your name becomes just a door for all names. But enter the + + + +sound. First, when you repeat "Ram, Ram, Ram..." it is just a word. But it means +something when you go on repeating "Ram, Ram, Ram..." + +You must have heard the story of Valmiki. He was given this mantra "Ram," but he was +an ignorant man - uneducated, simple, innocent, childlike. He started repeating "Ram, +Ram, Ram..." but he was repeating so much that he forgot completely and reversed the +whole thing. Instead he was chanting "Mara, Mara..." He was chanting "Ram, Ram, +Ram..." so fast that it became "Mara, Mara, Mara..." And he achieved the goal through +"Mara, Mara, mara..." + +If you go on repeating the name fast inside, soon it will not be a word: it will become a +sound, just meaningless. And then there is no difference between Ram and Mara - no +difference! Whether you call Ram or Mara, it makes no sense, they are not words. It is +just the sound, just the sound that matters. Enter the sound of your name. Forget the +meaning of it, just enter the sound. Meaning is with the mind, sound is with the body. +Meaning is in the head, sound spreads all over the body. So forget the meaning. Just +repeat it as a meaningless sound, and through this sound you will enter all sounds. This +sound will become the door to all sounds. + +And "all sounds" means all that exists. + +This is one of the basic tenets of Indian inner search, that the basic unit of the existence is +sound and not electricity. Modern science says that the basic unit of the existence is +electricity, not sound, but they also say that sound is a form of electricity. Indians, +however, have always been saying that electricity is nothing but a form of sound. + +You may have heard that through a particular RAGA, a particular sound, fire can be +created. It can be created - because this is the Indian idea, that sound is the basis of all +electricity. So if you hit sound in a particular frequency, electricity will be created. + +On long bridges, if a military, is passing, they are not allowed to march because many +times it has happened that because of their march the bridge falls. It is because of sound, +not because of their weight. They will be passing anyhow, but if they pass marching, then +the particular sound of their feet breaks the bridge. + +In old Hebrew history, the city of Jericho was very protected by great walls and it was +impossible to break those walls by guns. But through a particular sound the walls were +broken, and that sound was the secret of the breaking of those walls. If that sound is +created before walls, the walls will give way. + +You have heard the story of Ali Baba: a particular sound and the rock moves. + +These are allegories. Whether they are right or not, one thing is certain: if you can create +a particular sound so continuously that meaning is lost, mind is lost, the rock at your +heart will be removed. + + +THE END. + + + +Chapter 32: The path of surrender + + +The first question: + +Question 1 + +BELOVED MASTER, PLEASE EXPLAIN WHETHER THE TECHNIQUES YOU +HAVE DISCUSSED SO FAR FROM VIGYANA BHAIRAVA TANTRA BELONG TO +THE SCIENCE OF YOGA INSTEAD OF TO THE ACTUAL AND CENTRAL +SUBJECT MATTER OF TANTRA. WHAT IS THE CENTRAL SUBJECT MATTER +OF TANTRA? + +This question arises to many. The techniques that we have discussed also belong to yoga. +They are the same techniques, but with a difference: you can use the same techniques +with a very different philosophy behind them. The framework, the pattern differs, not the +technique. You may have a different attitude toward life, just the contrary to tantra. + +Yoga believes in struggle; yoga is basically the path of will. Tantra does not believe in a +struggle; tantra is not the path of will. Rather, on the contrary, tantra is the path of total +surrender. Your will is not needed. For tantra your will is the problem, the source of all +anguish. For yoga your surrender, your will-lessness is the problem. + +Because your will is weak, that is why you are in anguish, suffering - for yoga. For +tantra, because you have a will, because you have an ego, an individuality, that is why +you are suffering. Yoga says, bring your will to absolute perfection and you will be +liberated. Tantra says, dissolve your will completely, become totally emptied of it, and +that will be your liberation. + +And both are right; this creates the problem. For me, both are right. + +But the path of yoga is a very difficult one. It is just impossible, nearly impossible, that +you can attain to the perfection of the ego. It means you become the center of the whole +universe. The path is very long, arduous, and really, it never reaches to the end. So what +happens to the followers of yoga? Somewhere on the path, in some life, they turn to +tantra. + +Intellectually yoga is conceivable; existentially it is impossible. If it is possible you will +reach by yoga also, but generally it never happens. Even if it happens, it happens very +rarely, such as to a Mahavir. Sometimes centuries and centuries pass and then a man like +Mahavir appears who has achieved through yoga. But he is rare, an exception, and he +breaks the rule. + +But yoga is more attractive than tantra. Tantra is easy, natural, and you can attain through +tantra very easily, very naturally, effortlessly. And because of this, tantra never appeals to +you as much. Why? Anything that appeals to you appeals to your ego. Whatsoever you +feel is going to fulfill your ego will appeal to you more. You are gripped in the ego; thus +yoga appeals to you very much. + +Really, the more egoistic you are, the more yoga will appeal to you, because it is pure +ego effort. The more impossible, the more it is appealing to the ego. That is why Mount. + +Everest has so much appeal. There is so much attraction to reach to the top of a +Himalayan peak because it is so difficult. And when Hillary and Tensing reached Mount. +Everest, they felt a very ecstatic moment. What was that? It was because the ego was +fulfilled — they were the first. + +When the first man landed on the moon, can you imagine how he felt? He was the first in + + + +all history. And now he cannot be replaced; he will remain the first in all the history to +come. Now there is no way to change his status. The ego is fulfilled deeply. There is no +competitor now, and there cannot be. Many will land on the moon but they will not be the +first. But many can land on the moon and many can go to Everest — yoga gives you a +higher peak. And the more unreachable the end, the more there is the perfection of the +ego — pure, perfect, absolute ego. + +Yoga would have appealed to Nietzsche very much because he felt that the energy which +is working behind life is the energy of will — the will to power. Y oga gives you that +feeling. You are more powerful through it. + +The more you can control yourself, the more you can control your instincts, the more you +can control your body and the more you can control your mind, then the more you feel +powerful. You become a master inside. But this is through conflict; this is through +struggle and violence. And it always happens more or less that a person who has been +practicing yoga for many lives comes to a point where the whole journey becomes drab, +dreary, futile, because the more ego is fulfilled, the more you will feel it is useless. + +Then the follower of the path of yoga turns to tantra. + +But yoga appeals because everyone is an egoist. Tantra never appeals in the beginning. +Tantra can appeal only to the higher depths — to those who have worked on themselves, +who have really been struggling through yoga for many lives. Then tantra appeals to +them because they can understand. Ordinarily you will not be attracted by tantra, and if +you are attracted you will be attracted by the wrong reasons, so try to understand them +also. + +You will not be attracted by tantra in the first place because it asks you to surrender, not +to fight. It asks you to float, not to swim. It asks you to move with the current, not to go +upstream. It tells you, nature is good; trust nature, do not fight it. Even sex is good. Trust +it, follow it, flow into it; do not fight it. "no-fight" is the central teaching of tantra. Flow. +Let go! It cannot appeal, there is no fulfillment of your ego through it. In the first step it +asks for your ego to be dissolved, in the very beginning it asks you to dissolve it. + +Yoga also asks you, but at the end. First it will ask you to purify it. And if it is purified +completely it dissolves, it cannot remain. But that is the last in yoga, and in tantra that is +the first. + +So tantra will not appeal generally. And if it does appeal, it will appeal for wrong +reasons. For example, if you want to indulge in sex then you can rationalize your +indulgence through tantra. + +That can become the appeal. If you want to indulge in wine, in women, in other things, +you can feel attracted toward tantra. But really, you are not attracted to tantra. Tantra is a +facade — a trick. You are attracted to something else which you think tantra allows you. +So tantra always appeals for wrong reasons. + +Tantra is not to help your indulgence, it is to transform it. So do not deceive yourself. +Through tantra you can deceive yourself very easily, and because of this possibility of +deception Mahavir would not describe tantra. This possibility is always there. And man is +so deceptive that he can show one thing when he really means another, he can rationalize. +For example, in China, in old China, there was something like tantra — a secret science. It +is known as Tao. Tao has similar trends to tantra. For example, Tao says that it is good, if +you want to be freed of sex, that you should not stick to one person — to one woman or +one man. You should not stick to one person if you want to be freed. Tao says that it is + + + +better to go on changing partners. + +This is absolutely right, but you can rationalize it; you can deceive yourself. You may +just be a sex maniac and you can think that "I am doing tantra practice, so I cannot stick +to one woman. I have to change." And many emperors in China practiced it. They had big +harems only for this. + +But Tao is meaningful if you look deep down into human psychology. + +If you know only one woman, sooner or later your attraction for that woman will wither +away, but your attraction for women will remain. You will be attracted by the other sex. +This woman, your wife, will really not be of the opposite sex. She will not attract you, +she will not be a magnet for you. You will have become accustomed to her. + +Tao says that if a man moves amidst women, women, he will not only go beyond one, he +will go beyond the opposite sex. The very knowledge of many women will help him to +transcend. And this is right — but dangerous, because you would like it not because it is +right but because it gives you license. That is the problem with tantra. + +So in China also that knowledge was suppressed; it had to be suppressed. In India tantra +was also suppressed because it said many dangerous things - dangerous only because you +are deceptive. Otherwise they are wonderful. Nothing has happened to the human mind +that is more wonderful and mysterious than tantra; no knowledge is so deep. + +But knowledge always has its dangers. For example, now science has become a danger +because it has come to know many deep secrets. Now it knows how to create atomic +energy. Einstein is reported to have said that if he is again given a life, rather than being a +scientist he would like to be a plumber, because as he looks back, his whole life has been +futile — not only futile, but dangerous to humanity. + +And he has given one of the deepest secrets, but to a mankind which is self-deceptive. + +I wonder... the day may come soon when we will have to suppress scientific knowledge. +There are rumors that there are secret thoughts amid scientists about whether to disclose +more or not — whether they should stop the search or whether they should go further, +because now it is dangerous ground. + +Every knowledge is dangerous; only ignorance is not dangerous, you cannot do much +with it. Superstitions are always good — never dangerous. They are homeopathic. If the +medicine is given to you, it is not going to hann you. Whether it is going to help you or +not depends on your own innocence, but one thing is certain: it is not going to hann you. +Homeopathy is harmless; it is a deep superstition. If it works, it can only help. + +Remember, if something can only help then it is deep superstition. If it can do both, help +and hann, then only is it knowledge. A real thing can do both, help and harm. Only an +unreal thing can just help. But then the help never comes from the thing, it is always a +projection of your own mind. So, in a way, only illusory things are good; they never harm +you. + +Tantra is science, and it is deeper than atomic knowledge because atomic science is +concerned with matter and tantra is concerned with you, and you are always more +dangerous than any atomic energy. + +Tantra is concerned with the biological atom, with you — the living cell; with life +consciousness itself and how its inner mechanism works. + +That is why tantra became so much interested in sex. One who is interested in life and +consciousness will automatically become interested in sex because sex is the source of + + + +life, of love, of all that is happening in the world of consciousness. So if a seeker is not +interested in sex, he is not a seeker at all. He may be a philosopher, but he is not a seeker. +And philosophy is, more or less, nonsense - thinking about things which are of no use. + +I have heard that Mulla Nasruddin was interested in girls, but he had very bad luck with +girls, no one would like him. He was going to meet a certain girl for the first time, so he +asked a friend, "What is your secret? You are wonderful with women, you simply +hypnotize them, and I am always a failure, so give me some clue. I am going on a date for +the first time with a girl, so give me some secrets." + +The friend said, "Remember three things: always talk about food, family and +philosophy." + +"Why about food?" Mulla asked. The friend said, "I talk about food because then the girl +feels good - because every woman is interested in food. She is food for the child, for the +whole humanity she is food, so she is basically interested in food." + +Mulla said, "Okay. And why family?" So the man said, "Talk about her family so your +intentions look honorable." + + +Then Mulla said, "And why about philosophy?" The man said, "Talk about philosophy. +That makes the woman feel that she is intelligent." + +So Mulla rushed. Immediately, when he saw the girl, he said, "Hello, do you like +noodles?" The girl was startled and said, "No!" + +Then the Mulla asked the second question: "Have you got two brothers?" The girl was +even more startled and wondered, "What type of date is this?" She said, "No!" + +So for a moment Mulla was at a loss. He wondered, "How to start talking about +philosophy?" Just for a moment he was at a loss, and then he asked, "Now, if you had a +brother would he like noodles?" + +Philosophy is more or less nonsense. Tantra is not interested in philosophy; tantra is +interested in actual existential life. So tantra never asks whether there is a God or whether +there is MOKSHA, liberation, or whether there is hell or heaven. Tantra asks basic +questions about life. That is why there is so much interest in sex and love. They are basic. +YOU ARE through them; you are part of them. + +You are a play of sex energy and nothing less, and unless you understand this energy and +transcend it you will never be anything more. You are, right now, nothing but sex energy. +You can be more, but if you do not understand this and you do not transcend it you never +will be more. The possibility is just there as a seed. + +That is why tantra is interested in sex, in love, in natural life. + +But the way to know it is not through conflict. Tantra says you cannot know anything if +you are in a fighting mood because then you are not receptive. Then because you are +fighting the secrets will be hidden from you — you are not open to receive. And whenever +you are fighting you are always outside. If you are fighting sex you are always outside; if +you surrender to sex you reach the very inner core of it; you are an insider. If you +surrender; then many things become known. + +You have been in sex, but always with a fighting attitude behind it. That is why you have +not known many secrets. For example, you have not known the life-giving forces of sex. +You have not them known because you cannot know — that needs you to be an insider. + +If you are really flowing with sex energy, totally surrendered, sooner or later you will +arrive at the point where you will know that sex cannot only give birth to a new life: sex + + + +can give you more life. To lovers sex can become a life-giving force, but for that you +need a surrender. And once you are surrendered, many dimensions change. + +For example, tantra has known, Tao has known that if you ejaculate in the act, then it +cannot be life-giving to you. There is no need to ejaculate; ejaculation can be totally +forgotten. Tantra and Tao both say ejaculation is because you are lighting; otherwise +there is no need of it. + + +The lover and the beloved can be in a deep sexual embrace, just relaxing into each other +with no hurry to ejaculate, with no hurry to end the affair. They can just relax into each +other. And if this relaxation is total, they both will feel more life. They both will enrich +each other. + +Tao says a man can live for one thousand years if he is not in any hurry with sex, if he is +deeply relaxed. If a woman and man are deeply relaxed with each other, simply melting +into each other, absorbed into each other, not in any hurry, not in any tension, many +things happen — alchemical things happen — because the life juices of both, the +electricity of both, the bio-energy of both, meet. And just by this meeting — because they +are "anti"; one is negative, one is positive: they are anti-poles — Just by meeting with +each other deeply, they invigorate each other, make each other vital, more alive. + +They can live for a long time, and they can live never becoming old. But this can only be +known if you are not in a fighting mood. And this seems paradoxical. Those who are +fighting sex, they will ejaculate sooner because the tense mind is in a hurry to be relieved +of the tension. + +New research says many surprising things, many surprising facts. Masters and Johnson, +they have worked scientifically for the first time with what happens in deep intercourse. +They have come to realize that seventy-five percent of men are premature ejaculators — +seventy-five percent Before there is a deep meeting they have ejaculated and the act is +finished. + +And ninety percent of women never have any orgasm; they never reach to a peak, to a +deep, fulfilling peak — ninety percent of women! + +That is why women are so angry and irritated, and they will remain so. No meditation can +help them to be peaceful and no philosophy, no religion, no ethics will make them at ease +with the men with whom they are living. They are in frustration, in anger, because +modern science and old tantra both say that unless a woman is deeply fulfilled +orgasmically she will be a problem in the family. That which she is lacking will create +irritations and she will be always in a fighting mood. + +So if your wife is always in a fighting mood, think again about the whole thing. It is not +simply the wife — you may be the cause. And because women are not achieving orgasm, +they become anti-sex. They are not willing to go into sex easily. They have to be bribed; +they are not ready to go into sex. Why should they be ready if they never achieve any +deep bliss through it? Rather, they feel after it that the man has been using them, that they +have been used. They feel like a thing which has been used and then discarded. + +The man is satisfied because be has ejaculated. Then he moves and goes to sleep, and the +wife goes on weeping. She has been just used, and the experience has not been in any +way fulfilling to her. It may have relieved her husband or lover or friend, but it has not +been in any way fulfilling to her. + + + +Ninety percent of women do not even know what orgasm is. They have never known it; +they have never reached a peak of such a blissful convulsion of the body that every fiber +vibrates and every cell becomes alive. They have not reached it, and this is because of an +anti-sexual attitude in the society. The fighting mind is there, and the woman is so +repressed that she has become frigid. + +The man goes on doing the act as if it is a sin. He feels it as guilt: "It is not to be done." +And while he is making love to his wife or beloved, he is thinking of some MAHATMA +— so-called saint — of how to go to the mahatma and how to transcend this sex, this guilt, +this sin. + +It is very difficult to get rid of the mahatmas, they are already there even while you are +making love. You are not two; one mahatma must be there. If there is no mahatma, then +God is watching you doing this sin. The concept of God in people's minds is just that of a +Peeping Tom — he is always watching you. This attitude creates anxiety, and when +anxiety is there ejaculation comes soon. + +When there is no anxiety, ejaculation can be postponed for hours — even for days. And +there is no need of it. If the love is deep, both parties can invigorate each other. Then +ejaculation completely ceases, and for years two lovers can meet with each other without +any ejaculation, without any wastage of energy. + +They can just relax with each other. Their bodies meet and relax; they enter sex and +relax. And sooner or later, sex will not be an excitement. It is an excitement right now. +Then it is not an excitement, it is a relaxation, a deep let-go. + +But that can happen only if you have first surrendered inside to the life energy — the life +force. Only then can you surrender to your lover or beloved. Tantra says, this happens, +and it says how it can happen. + +Tantra says, never make love while you are excited. This seems very absurd because you +want to make love when you are excited. And normally, both partners excite each other +in order that they can make love. But tantra says that in excitement you are wasting +energy. Make love while you are calm, serene, meditative. First meditate, then make +love, and when making love do not go beyond the limit. What do I mean by "do not go +beyond the limit"? Do not become excited and violent, in order that your energy will not +be dispersed. + +If you see two persons making love you will feel that they are fighting. If small children +sometimes see their father and mother making love, they think the father is going to kill +the mother. It looks violent; it looks like a fight. It is not beautiful, it looks ugly. + +It must be more musical, harmonious. The two partners must be as if they are dancing, +not fighting — as if singing one harmonious melody, just creating an atmosphere in which +both may dissolve and become one. + +And then they relax. This is what tantra means. Tantra is not sexual at all, tantra is the +least sexual thing and yet it has so much concern with sex. And if through this relaxation +and let-go nature reveals to you its secrets, it is no wonder. Then you begin to be aware +of what is happening. And in that awareness of what is happening many secrets come to +your mind. + +Firstly, sex becomes life-giving. As it is now it is death giving, you are simply dying +through it, wasting yourself, deteriorating. Secondly, it becomes the deepest natural +meditation. Your thoughts cease completely. When you are totally relaxed with your + + + +lover, your thoughts cease. The mind is not there, only your heart beats. It becomes a +natural meditation. And if love cannot help you into meditation, nothing will help, +because everything else is just superfluous, superficial. If love cannot help, nothing will +help! + +Love has its own meditation. But you do not know love; you know only sex and you +know the misery of wasting energy. Then you get depressed after it. Then you decide to +take a vow of BRAHMACHARYA, celibacy. And this vow is taken in depression, this +vow is taken in anger, this vow is taken in frustration. It is not going to help. + +A vow can be helpful if taken in a very relaxed, deeply meditative mood. Otherwise you +are simply showing your anger, your frustration and nothing else, and you will forget the +vow within twenty-four hours. + +The energy will have come again, and just as an old routine you will have to release it. +Tantra says, sex is very deep because it is life. But you can be interested in tantra for the +wrong reasons. Do not be interested in tantra for wrong reasons, and then you will not +feel that tantra is dangerous. Then tantra is life transforming. + +Some tantric methods have been used by yoga also, but with a conflict, a fighting +attitude. Tantra uses the same methods, but with a very loving attitude — and that makes a +great difference. The very quality of the technique changes. The technique becomes +different because the whole background is different. + +It has been asked, "What is the central subject matter of tantra?" The answer is you! You +are the central subject matter of tantra: what you are right now and what is hidden in you +that can grow, what you are and what you can be. Right now you are a sex unit, and +unless this unit is understood deeply you cannot become a spirit, you cannot become a +spiritual unit. Sexuality and spirituality are two ends of one energy. + +Tantra starts with you as you are; yoga starts with what your possibility is. Yoga starts +with the end; tantra starts with the beginning. And it is good to start with the beginning. It +is always good to begin with the beginning, because if the end is made the beginning, +then you are creating unnecessary misery for yourself. + +You are not the end — not the ideal. You have to become a god, the ideal, and you are +just an animal. And this animal goes berserk because of the ideal of the god; it goes mad, +it goes crazy. + +Tantra says, forget the god. If you are the animal, understand this animal in its totality. In +that understanding itself, the god will grow. And if it cannot grow through that +understanding then forget it, it can never be. Ideals cannot bring your possibilities out; +only the knowledge of the real will help. So you are the central subject matter of tantra, +as you are and as you can become, your actuality and your possibility — they are the +subject matter. + +Sometimes people get worried. If you go to understand tantra God is not discussed, +moksha — liberation — is not discussed, nirvana is not discussed. What type of religion is +tantra? Tantra discusses things which make you feel disgusted, which you do not want to +discuss. Who wants to discuss sex? Everyone thinks he knows about it. Because you can +reproduce, you think you know. + +No one wants to discuss sex and sex is everyone's problem. No one wants to discuss love +because everyone feels he is a great lover already. And look at your life! It is just hatred +and nothing else. And whatsoever you call love is nothing but a relaxation, a little +relaxation, of the hatred. Look around you, and then you will know what you know about + + + +love. + + +Baal Shem, a fakir, went to his tailor every day for his robe, and the tailor took six +months to make a simple robe for the fakir. The poor fakir! When the robe was ready and +the tailor gave it to Baal Shem, Baal Shem said, "Tell me, even God had only six days to +create the world. Within six days God created the whole world and you took six months +to make this poor man’s robe?" + +Baal Shem remembered the tailor in his memoirs. The tailor said, "Yes, God created the +world in six days, but look at the world, at what type of world it is. Yes, he created the +world in six days, but look at the world!" + +Look around you; look at the world you have created. Then you will come to know that +you do not know anything, you are just groping in the dark. And because everyone else is +also groping in the dark, it cannot be that you are living in light. If everyone else is +groping in the dark you feel good, because then you feel there is no comparison. + +But you are also in the dark, and tantra starts with you as you are. Tantra wants to +enlighten you about basic things which you cannot deny. If you try to deny them, it is at +your own cost. + +The second question: + +Question 2 + +HOW CAN ONE CONVERT THE SEX ACT INTO A MEDITATIVE EXPERIENCE? +SHOULD ONE PRACTICE ANY SPECIAL POSITIONS IN SEX? + +Positions are irrelevant; positions are not very meaningful. + +The real thing is the attitude - not the position of the body, but the position of the mind. +But if you change your mind you may want to change your positions, because they are +related. But they are not basic. + +For example, the man is always on the woman — on top of the woman. This is an egoist +posture because the man always thinks he is better, superior, higher — how can he be +below the woman? But all over the world in primitive societies the woman is above the +man. So in Africa this posture is known as the missionary posture, because for the first +time when missionaries — Christian missionaries — went to Africa, the primitives just +could not understand what they were doing. They thought it would kill the woman. + +The man-on-top posture is known in Africa as the missionary posture. African primitives +say this is violent that man should be on top of the woman. She is weaker, delicate, so she +must be on top of the man. But it is difficult for man to think of himself as lower than +woman, under her. + +If your mind changes, many things will change. It is better that the woman should be on +top, for many reasons. If the woman is on top she will be passive, so she is not going to +do much violence; she will simply relax. And the man under her cannot do much, he will +have to relax. This is good. If he is on top he is going to be violent, he will do much. And +nothing is needed to be done on her part. + +For tantra you have to relax, so it is good that the woman should be on top. She can relax +better than any man. The feminine psychology is more passive, so relaxation comes easy. +Positions will change, but do not be bothered about positions much. Just change your +mind. Surrender to the life force, float in it. Sometimes, if you are really surrendered, +your bodies will take the right position that is needed in that moment. If both partners are + + + +deeply surrendered, their bodies will take the right posture that is needed. + +Every day situations change, so there is no need to fix postures beforehand. That is a +problem, that you try to fix it beforehand. Whenever you try to fix it, this is a fixing by +the mind; then you are not surrendering. + +If you surrender then you let things take their own shape, and that is a wonderful +hannony - when both partners have surrendered. They will take many postures or they +will not take them and will just relax. That depends on the life force, not on your cerebral +decision beforehand. You need not decide anything beforehand. Decision is the problem. +Even to make love, you decide. Even to make love, you go and consult books. + +There are books on how to make love. This shows what type of human mind we have +produced. You even consult books on how to make love. Then it becomes cerebral; you +think everything. Really, you create a rehearsal in the mind and then you enact it. + +Your action is a copy; it is never real then. You are enacting a rehearsal. It becomes +acting; it is not authentic. + +Just surrender and move with the force. What is the fear? Why be afraid? If you cannot +be unafraid with your lover, then where will you be unafraid? And once you have the +feeling that the life force helps by itself and takes the right path that is needed, it will give +you a very basic insight into your whole life. Then you can leave your whole life to the +divine. That is your beloved. + +Then you leave your whole life to the divine. Then you do not think and you do not plan; +you do not force the future according to you. You just allow yourself to move into the +future according to Him, according to the total. + +But how to make the sex act a meditation? Just by surrendering it becomes so. Do not +think about it, let it happen. And be relaxed, do not move ahead. This is one of the basic +problems with the mind: it always moves ahead. It is always seeking the result, and the +result is in the future. You are never in the act; you are always in the future seeking a +result. That seeking of a result is disturbing everything, it damages everything. + +Just be in the act. What is the future? It is to come; you need not worry about it. And you +are not going to bring it with your worries. It is already coming; it has already come. So +you forget about it, you just be here and now. + + +Sex can become a deep insight in being here and now. That is, I think, the only act now +left into which you can be here and now. You cannot be here and now while in your +office; you cannot be here and now while you are studying in your college; you cannot be +here and now anywhere in this modem world. Only in love can you be here and now. + +But even then you are not. You are thinking of the result. And now many modern books +have created many new problems. You read a book on how to make love, and then you +are afraid about whether you are making it rightly or wrongly. You read a book on how a +posture is to be taken, or what type of posture is to be used, and then you are afraid about +whether you are taking the right posture or not. + +Psychologists have created new worries in the mind. Now they say the husband must +remember whether his wife is achieving orgasm or not, so he is worried over it. And this +worry is not going to help in any way; it is going to become a hindrance. + +The wife is worried whether she is helping the husband to relax totally or not. She must +show that she is feeling very blissful. Then everything becomes false. Both are worried +about the result, and because of this worry the result will never come. + + + +Forget everything. Flow in the moment and allow your bodies their expression. Your +bodies know well; they have their own wisdom. + +Your bodies are constituted of sex cells. They have a built-in program; you are not asked +at all. Just leave it to the body and the body will move. This leaving it to nature together, +both together, this let-go, will create meditation automatically. + +And if you can feel it in sex, then you know one thing: that whenever you surrender you +will feel the same. Then you can surrender to a master. It is a love relationship. You can +surrender to a master, and then while you are putting your head at his feet, your head will +become empty. You will be in meditation. + +Then there is even no need of a master. Then go out and surrender to the sky. You know +how to surrender — that is all. Then you can go and surrender to a tree. But it looks +foolish because we do not know how to surrender. We see a person - a villager, a +primitive man - going to the river, surrendering himself to the river, calling the river the +Mother, the divine Mother, or surrendering himself to the rising sun, calling the rising +sun a great god, or going to a tree and putting his head at the roots and surrendering. + +For us it looks superstitious. You say, "What nonsense he is doing! What will the tree +do? What will the river do? They are not goddesses. What is the sun? The sun is not a +god." Anything becomes a god if you can surrender. So your surrender creates divinity. +There is nothing divine, there is only a surrendering mind which creates divinity. + + +Surrender to a wife and she becomes divine. Surrender to a husband and he becomes +divine. The divinity is revealed through surrender. Surrender to a stone and there is no +stone now: that stone has become a statue, a person — alive. + +So just know how to surrender. And when I say "how" to surrender, I do not mean to +know a technique; I mean you have a natural possibility of surrendering in love. + +Surrender in love and feel it there. And then let it spread all over your life. + +The third question: + +Question 3 + +PLEASE EXPLAIN WHETHER THE ANAHAT NADA - SOUNDLESS SOUND - IS +A TYPE OF SOUND OR WHETHER IT IS TOTAL SOUNDLESSNESS. AND ALSO +EXPLAIN HOW THE STATE OF TOTAL SOUNDFULNESS CAN BE EQUAL TO +TOTAL SOUNDLESSNESS. + +ANAHAT NADA is not a type of sound, it is soundlessness, but this soundlessness is +heard. To express it is difficult because then the logical question arises of how +soundlessness can be heard. + +Let me explain it.... I am sitting on this chair. If I go away from this chair, will you not +see my absence in the chair? It cannot be seen by one who has not seen me sitting here, +he will simply see the chair. But a moment before I was here and you have seen me +sitting here. If I move away and you look at the chair, you will see two things: the chair +and my absence. But that absence will be seen only if you have seen me and you have not +forgotten me, that I was there. + + +We are hearing sounds; we only know sounds. So when that soundlessness comes, anahat +nada, we feel that every sound has disappeared and absence is felt. That is why it is +called anahat nada. It is also called nada; ’nada’ means sound. But ANAHAT changes the + + + +quality of the sound. ’Anahat’ means uncreated, so it is uncreated sound. + +Every sound is a created sound. Whatsoever sounds you have heard, they are all created. +That which is created will die. I can clap my hands — a sound is created. It was not there +before and now it is no more; it was created and it has died. A created sound is known as +AHAT NADA. Uncreated sound is known as ANAHAT NADA - the sound that is +always. Which is that sound that is always? It is not really a sound. You call it a sound +because the absence is heard. + +If you live by a railway station and one day the railway union goes on strike, you will +hear something no one can hear. You will hear the absence of the trains coming and +going and moving. + +I was traveling in the past for at least three weeks every month. In the beginning it was +very difficult to sleep in the train, and then it became difficult to sleep at home. When I +was no longer sleeping only in trains, the sound of the train was missed. Whenever I +would reach home it would be difficult, because I would miss and I would feel the +absence of the railway sounds. + +We are accustomed to sounds. + +Every moment is filled with sound. Our heads are constantly filled by sounds and sounds +and sounds. When your mind goes away, moves up or down, goes beyond or below, +when you are not in the world of sounds, you can hear the absence. That absence is +soundlessness. + +But we have call it anahat nada. Because it is heard we call it nada — sound; and because +it is not really a sound we call it anahat — uncreated. "Uncreated sound" is contradictory. +Sound is created — "uncreated" contradicts. So all deep experiences of life have to be +expressed in contradictory terms. + +If you go and ask a master like Eckhart or Jacob Boehme, or Zen masters like Hui Hai or +Huang Po or Bodhidhanna or Nagarjuna, or Vedanta and the Upanishads, everywhere +you will find two contradictory terms whenever a deeper experience is talked about. The +Vedas say, "he is and He is not" — about God. + +You cannot find a more atheistic expression: "He is and he is not." he is far away and He +is near. He is far away and he is also near. Why contradictory statements? The +Upanishads say, "You cannot see him, but unless you see him you have not seen +anything." What type of language is this? + +Lao Tsu says that "Truth cannot be said" — and he is saying it! This too is a saying. He +says that "Truth cannot be said, if it is said it cannot be true," and then he writes a book +and says something about the truth. + +It is contradictory. + +One student came to a great old sage. The student said, "If you can forgive me master, I +want to relate to you something about myself. I have become an atheist; now I do not +believe in God." + +So the old sage asked, "For how many days have you been studying scriptures? For how +many days?" So the man, the seeker, the student said, "Nearabout twenty years I have +been studying the Vedas - the scriptures." So the old man sighed and said, "Just twenty +years and you have the nerve to say that you have become an atheist?" + +The student was puzzled. What was this old man saying? So he said, "I am puzzled. What +are you saying? You make me more confused than when I came here." The old man said, +"Go on studying the Vedas. In the beginning one says God is. Only in the end does one + + + +say God is not. To become an atheist you will have to travel much into theism. God is at +the beginning; God is not at the end. Do not be in a hurry." The student was even more +puzzled. + +"God is and God is not" has been uttered by those who know. "God is" is uttered by those +who do not know and "God is not" is also uttered by those who do not know. Those who +know, they utter both simultaneously: God is and God is not. + +"Anahat nada" is a contradictory term, but used with much consideration — with deep +consideration. It is meaningful. It says that the phenomenon is felt as a sound and it is not +a sound. + +It is felt as a sound because you have only felt sounds, you do not know any other +language. You know only the language of sounds; that is why it is felt as sound. But it is +silence, not sound. + +And the question fhrther says: EXPLAIN IN WHICH WAY THE STATE OF +SOUNDFULNESS CAN BE EQUAL TO TOTAL SOUNDLESSNESS. It is always so. +The zero and the absolute both mean the same! + +For example, if I have ajar which is completely empty and I have another jar which is +completely filled, both are complete. One is completely empty, another is completely +filled. But both are complete, both are perfect. If the jar is half-filled, it is half-filled and +half-empty. You can call it half-empty, you can call it half-filled. But whether it is +completely empty or completely filled, one thing is common to both: completeness! +Soundlessness is complete. You cannot do anything more to make it more soundless. +Understand this: it is complete, nothing can be done. You have come to a point beyond +which there is no movement possible. And if a sound is total you cannot add anything to +it. You have come to another limit; you cannot go beyond it. This is common and this is +what is meant. + +One can say it is soundlessness because no sound is heard, everything has become absent. +You cannot take anything further from it; it is complete. Or you can say it is a complete +sound, a full sound, absolute sound; nothing can be added to it. + +But in both the cases the indication is for perfection, absoluteness, wholeness. + +It depends on the mind. There are two types of minds and two types of expressions. For +example, if you ask Buddha, "What will happen in deep meditation? When one achieves +SAMADHI what will happen?" he will say, "There will be no DUKKHA — there will be +no pain." He will never say there will be bliss, he will simply say there will be no pain — +just painlessness. If you ask Shankara, he will never talk about pain. He will simply say, +"There will be bliss — absolute bliss." + +And both are expressing the same experience. Buddha saying "no pain" refers to the +world. He says, "All the pains I have known are not there. And whatsoever is there, I +cannot relate it in your language." + +Shankara says, "There is bliss, absolute bliss." He never talks about the world and its +pain. He is not referring to your world; he is referring to the experience itself. He is +positive; Buddha is negative. But their indications are toward the same moon. + +Their fingers are different, but what their fingers indicate is the same. + + +THE END. + + + +Chapter 33: The spirituality of the trantic sex act + + +AT THE START OF SEXUAL UNION KEEP ATTENTIVE ON THE FIRE IN THE +BEGINNING, AND SO CONTINUING, AVOID THE EMBERS IN THE END. + +WHEN IN SUCH EMBRACE YOUR SENSES ARE SHAKEN AS LEAVES, ENTER +THIS SHAKING. + +EVEN REMEMBERING UNION, WITHOUT THE EMBRACE, + +TRANSFORMATION. + +ON JOYOUSLY SEEING A LONG ABSENT FRIEND, PERMEATE THIS JOY. +WHEN EATING OR DRINKING, BECOME THE TASTE OF FOOD OR DRINK, + +AND BE FILLED. + +Sigmund Freud has said somewhere that man is born neurotic. This is a half-truth. Man is +not born neurotic, but he is bom in a neurotic humanity and the society around drives +everyone neurotic sooner or later. Man is born natural, real, nonnal, but the moment the +newborn becomes part of the society neurosis starts working. + +As we are, we are neurotic, and the neurosis consists of a split — a deep split. You are not +one: you are two or even many. This has to be understood deeply; only then can we +proceed in tantra. Your feeling and thinking have become two different things: this is the +basic neurosis. Your thinking part and your feeling part have become two, and you are +identified with the thinking part, not with the feeling part. And feeling is more real than +thinking; feeling is more natural than thinking. You have come with a feeling heart, but +thinking is cultivated; it is given by society. And your feeling has become a suppressed +thing. + +Even when you say that you feel, you only think that you feel. The feeling has become +dead, and this has happened for certain reasons. + +When a child is born, he is a feeling being: he feels things. He is not a thinking being yet. +He is natural, just like anything natural in nature — just like a tree or like an animal. But +we start molding him, cultivating. He has to suppress his feelings because without +suppressing his feelings he is always in trouble. When he wants to cry he cannot cry +because his parents will not approve of it. He will be condemned. He will not be +appreciated, he will not be loved. He is not accepted as he is. He must behave: he must +behave according to a particular ideology, ideals. Only then will he be loved. + +Love is not for him as he is. He can be loved only if he follows certain rules. Those rules +are imposed; they are not natural. The natural being begins to become suppressed, and +the unnatural, the unreal, is imposed over it. This unreal is your mind, and a moment +comes when the split is so great that you cannot bridge it. You go on forgetting +completely what your real nature was — or is. You are a false face; the original face is +lost. And you are also afraid to feel the original, because the moment you feel it the +whole society will be against you. So you yourself are against your real nature. + +This creates a very neurotic state. + +You do not know what you want; you do not know what are your real, authentic needs. +And then you go on after non-authentic needs because only the feeling heart can give you +the sense, the direction, of what are your real needs. When they are suppressed you create +symbolic needs. For example, you may go on eating more and more, stuffing yourself + + + +with food, and you may never feel that you are filled. The need is for love; it is not for +food. But food and love are deeply related, so when the need for love is not felt, or is +suppressed, a false need for food is created and you can go on eating. Because the need is +false, it can never be fulfilled, and we live in false needs. That is why there is no +fulfillment. + +You want to be loved; that is a basic need — natural. But it can be diverted into a false +dimension. For example, the love need, the need to be loved, can be felt as a false need if +you try to divert the attention of others to yourself. You want that others should pay +attention to you, so you may become a political leader. Great crowds may pay attention to +you, but the real basic need is to be loved. And even if the whole world is paying +attention to you, that basic need cannot be fulfilled. That basic need can be fulfilled even +by a single person loving you, paying attention to you because of love. + +When you love someone, you pay attention to him. Attention and love are deeply related. + +If you suppress the need for love, then it becomes a symbolic need; then you need the +attention of others. You may get it, but then too there will be no fulfillment. The need is +false, disconnected from the natural, basic need. This division in the personality is +neurosis. + +Tantra is a very revolutionary concept — the oldest and yet the newest. Tantra is one of +the oldest traditions and yet non-traditional, even anti-traditional, because tantra says +unless you are whole and one you are missing life altogether. You should not remain in a +split state: you must become one. What to do to become one? You can go on thinking, +but that is not going to help because thinking is the technique to divide. Thinking is +analytical. It divides; it splits things. Feeling unites, synthesizes, makes things one. So +you can go on thinking, reading, studying, contemplating. It is not going to help unless +you fall back to the feeling center. But it is very difficult, because even when we think +about the feeling center, WE THINK! + +When you say to someone, "I love you," be aware of whether it is just a thought or +whether it is a feeling. If it is just a thought, then you are missing something. A feeling is +of the whole: your whole body, mind, everything you are, is involved. In thinking, only +your head is involved, and that too not totally, but just a fragment of it. There is only a +passing thought; it may not be there the next moment. + +Only a fragment is involved, and that creates much misery in life — because with a +fragmentary thought, you give promises which you cannot fulfill. You can say, "I love +you and I will love you forever." However, the second part is a promise which you +cannot fulfill because it is given by a fragmentary thought. Your whole being is not +involved in it. And what will you do tomorrow when the fragment has gone and the +thought is no more there? Now the promise will become a bondage. + +Sartre said somewhere that every promise is going to be false. You cannot promise +because you are not whole. Just a part of you promises, and when the part is no more +there on the throne and another part has taken over, what are you going to do? Who will +fulfill the promise? Hypocrisy is bom because when you go on trying to fulfill, +pretending that you are fulfilling, then everything becomes false. Tantra says fall down +deep within to the feeling center. What to do and how to fall back? Now I will enter the +sutras. These sutras, each sutra, is an effort to make you whole. + + +The first sutra: + + + +"AT THE START OF SEXUAL UNION KEEP ATTENTIVE ON THE FIRE IN THE +BEGINNING, AND SO CONTINUING, AVOID THE EMBERS IN THE END." + +Sex can be a very deep fulfillment, and sex can throw you back to your wholeness, to +your natural, real being, for many reasons. Those reasons have to be understood. + +One, sex is a total act. You are thrown off your mind, off balance. That is why there is so +much fear of sex. You are identified with the mind, and sex is a no-mind act. You +become headless; you do not have any head in the act. There is no reasoning, no mental +process. And if there is any mental process, there is no real, authentic sex act. Then there +is no orgasm, no fulfillment. Then the sex act itself becomes a local thing, something +cerebral, and it has become so. + +All over the world, so much hankering, so much lust for sex, is not because the world has +become more sexual. It is because you cannot even enjoy sex as a total act. The world +was more sexual before. That is why there was no such hankering for sex. This hankering +shows that the real is missing and there is only the false. The whole modern mind has +become sexual because the sex act itself is no more there. Even the sex act is transferred +to the mind. It has become mental; you think about it. + +Many people come to me: they say they go on thinking about sex; they enjoy thinking +about it, reading, seeing pictures, pornography. They enjoy this, but when the actual +moment for sex comes they suddenly feel they are not interested. They even feel they +have become impotent. They feel vital energy when they are thinking. When they want to +move into the actual act, they feel there is no energy, even no desire. + +They feel that the body has become dead. + +What is happening to them? Even the sex act has become mental. They can only think +about it; they cannot do it because doing will involve their whole being. And whenever +there is any involvement of the whole, the head becomes uneasy because then it can no +more be the master; it can no more be in control. + +Tantra uses the sex act to make you whole, but then you have to move in it very +meditatively. Then you have to move in it forgetting all that you have heard about sex, +studied about sex, all that the society has told you: the church, your religion, the teachers. +Forget everything and get involved in it in your totality. Forget to control! Control is the +barrier. Rather, be possessed by it; do not control it. Move in it as if you have become +mad. The "no-mind" state looks like madness. Become the body, become the animal, +because the animal is whole. And as modem man is, only sex seems to be the easiest +possibility to make you whole because sex is the deepest, the biological center within +you. You are born out of it. Your every cell is a sex cell; your whole body is a sex-energy +phenomenon. + +This first sutra says, "AT THE START OF SEXUAL UNION KEEP ATTENTIVE ON +THE FIRE IN THE BEGINNING, AND SO CONTINUING, AVOID THE EMBERS IN +THE END." And this makes the whole difference. For you, the sex act is a release. So +when you move in it you are in a hurry. + +You just want a release. Overflowing energy will be released; you will feel at ease. This +at-easeness is just a sort of weakness. Overflowing energy creates tensions, excitement. +You feel something has to be done. When the energy is released, you feel weak. You may +take this weakness as relaxation. Because the excitement is no more, the overflowing +energy is no more, you can relax. But this relaxation is a negative relaxation. If you can + + + +relax just by throwing energy, it is at a very great cost. And this relaxation can only be +physical. It cannot go deeper and cannot become spiritual. + +This first sutra says don’t be in a hurry and do not hanker for the end: remain with the +beginning. There are two parts to the sex act — the beginning and the end. Remain with +the beginning. The beginning part is more relaxed, wann. But do not be in a hurry to +move to the end. Forget the end completely. + +"At the start of sexual union, keep attentive on the fire in the beginning." While you are +overflowing, do not think in terms of release: remain with this overflowing energy. Do +not seek ejaculation: forget it completely. Be whole in this wann beginning. Remain with +your beloved or your lover as if you have become one. Create a circle. + +There are three possibilities. Two lovers meeting can create three figures — geometrical +figures. You may have even read about it or even seen an old alchemical picture in which +a man and woman are standing naked within three geometrical figures. + +One figure is a square, another figure is a triangle and the third figure is a circle. + +This is one of the old alchemical and tantric analyses of the sex act. Ordinarily, when you +are in the sex act, there are four persons, not two, and this is a square: four angles are +there because you yourself are divided in two — into the thinking part and the feeling +part. Your partner is also divided in two; you are four persons. Two persons are not +meeting there, four persons are meeting. It is a crowd, and there can be no deep meeting +really. There are four corners, and the meeting is just false. It looks like a meeting, but it +is not. There can be no communion because your deeper part is hidden and your +beloved's deeper part is also hidden. And only two heads are meeting, only two thinking +processes are meeting — not two feeling processes. They are hidden. + +The second type of meeting can be like a triangle. You are two — two angles of the base. +For a sudden moment you become one, like the third angle of the triangle. For a sudden +moment your two-ness is lost and you become one. This is better than a square meeting +because at least for a single moment there is oneness. That oneness gives you health, +vitality. You feel alive and young again. + +But the third is the best and the third is the tantric meeting: you become a circle. There +are no angles, and the meeting is not for a single moment. + +The meeting is really non-temporal; there is no time in it. And this can happen only if +you are not seeking ejaculation. If you are seeking ejaculation, then it will become a +triangle meeting — because the moment there is ejaculation the contact point is lost. +Remain with the beginning; do not move to the end. How to remain in the beginning? +Many things are to be remembered. First, don't take the sex act as a way of going +anywhere. Don’t take it as a means: it is the end in itself. There is no end to it; it is not a +means. Secondly, do not think of the future; remain with the present. And if you cannot +remain in the present in the beginning part of the sex act, then you can never remain in +the present — because the very nature of the act is such that you are thrown into the +present. + +Remain in the present. Enjoy the meeting of two bodies, two souls, and merge into each +other, melt into each other. Forget that you are going anywhere. Remain in the moment +going nowhere, and melt. Warmth, love, should be made a situation for two persons to +melt into each other. That is why, if there is no love, the sex act is a hurried act. You are +using the other; the other is just a means. And the other is using you. You are exploiting +each other, not merging into each other. With love you can merge. This merging in the + + + +beginning will give many new insights. + +If you are not in a hurry to finish the act, the act, by and by, becomes less and less sexual +and more and more spiritual. + +Sex organs also melt into each other. A deep, silent communion happens between two +body energies, and then you can remain for hours together. This togetherness moves +deeper and deeper as time passes. But don’t think. Remain with the moment deeply +merged. It becomes an ecstasy, a samadhi, cosmic consciousness. And if you can know +this, if you can feel and realize this, your sexual mind will become non-sexual. A very +deep BRAHMACHARYA, CELIBACY, can be attained. Celibacy can be attained +through it! + +This looks paradoxical because we have been always thinking in terms that if a person +has to remain celibate he must not look at the other sex, he must not meet the other sex. +He must avoid, escape. A very false celibacy happens then: the mind goes on thinking +about the other sex. And the more you escape from the other, the more you have to think, +because this is a basic, deep need. + +Tantra says do not try to escape; there is no escape possible. Rather, use nature itself to +transcend. Don’t fight: accept nature in order to transcend it. If this communion with your +beloved or your lover is prolonged with no end in mind, then you can just remain in the +beginning. Excitement is energy. You can lose it; you can come to a peak. Then the +energy is lost and a depression will follow, a weakness will follow. You may take it as +relaxation, but it is negative. + +Tantra gives you a dimension of a higher relaxation which is positive. + +Both partners melting with each other give vital energy to each other. They become a +circle, and their energy begins to move in a circle. They are giving life to each other, +renewing life. No energy is lost. Rather, more energy is gained because through the +contact with the opposite sex your every cell is challenged, excited. And if you can +merge into that excitement without leading it to a peak, if you can remain in the +beginning without becoming hot, just remaining warm, then those two "warmths" will +meet and you can prolong the act for a very long time. With no ejaculation, with no +throwing energy out, it becomes a meditation, and through it you become whole. + +Through it your split personality is no more split: it is bridged. + +All neurosis is a "splitness." If you are bridged again, you become again a child — +innocent. And once you know this innocence you can go on behaving in your society as it +requires. But now this behavior is just a drama, an acting. You are not involved in it. It is +a requirement, so you do it. But you are not in it; you are just acting. + +You will have to use unreal faces because you live in an unreal world; otherwise the +world will crush you and kill you. We have killed many real faces. We crucified Jesus +because he started behaving like a real man. The unreal society will not tolerate it. We +poisoned Socrates because he started behaving like a real man. + +Behave as the society requires; do not create unnecessary troubles for yourself and +others. But once you know your real being and the wholeness, the unreal society cannot +drive you neurotic; it cannot make you mad. + +"AT THE START OF SEXUAL UNION KEEP ATTENTIVE ON THE FIRE IN THE +BEGINNING, AND SO CONTINUING, AVOID THE EMBERS IN THE END". IF +ejaculation is there, energy is dissipated. Then there is no more fire. You are simply + + + +relieved of your energy without gaining anything. + + +The second sutra: + +"WHEN IN SUCH EMBRACE YOUR SENSES ARE SHAKEN AS LEAVES, ENTER +THIS SHAKING." + +When in such embrace, in such deep communion with the beloved or the lover, your +senses are shaken as leaves, enter this shaking. We have even become afraid: while +making love you do not allow your bodies to move much, because if your bodies are +allowed much movement the sex act spreads all over your body. You can control it when +it is localized at the sex center. The mind can remain in control. When it spreads all over +your body, you cannot control it. You may start shaking, you may start screaming, and +you will not be able to control your body once the body takes over. + +We suppress movements. Particularly, all over the world, we suppress all movements, all +shaking for women. They remain just like dead bodies. You are doing something to them; +they are not doing anything to you. + +They are just passive partners. Why is this happening? Why all over the world do men +suppress women in such a way? There is fear — because once a woman's body becomes +possessed, it is very difficult for a man to satisfy her: because a woman can have chain +orgasms; a man cannot have. A man can have only one orgasm; a woman can have chain +orgasms. There are cases of multiple orgasms reported. Any woman can have at least +three orgasms in a chain, but man can have only one. And with man’s orgasm, the woman +is aroused and is ready for further orgasms. Then it is difficult. Then how to manage it? +She needs another man immediately, and group sex is a taboo. All over the world we +have created monogamous societies. We seem to feel that it is better to suppress the +woman. So, really, eighty to ninety percent of women never know what orgasm is. They +can give birth to children; that is another thing. They can satisfy the man; that is also +another thing. But they themselves are never satisfied. So if you see such bitterness in +women all over the world — sadness, bitterness, frustration — it is natural. Their basic +need is not fulfilled. + +Shaking is just wonderful because when you shake in your sex act the energy starts +flowing all over the body, the energy vibrates all over the body. Every cell of the body is +involved then. Every cell becomes alive because every cell is a sex cell. + + +When you were born, two sex cells met and your being was created, your body was +created, those two sex cells are everywhere in your body. They have multiplied and +multiplied and multiplied, but your basic unit remains the sex cell. When you shake all +over your body, it is not only a meeting of you with your beloved. Within your body also, +each cell is meeting with the opposite cell. This shaking shows it. It will look animal-like, +but man IS an animal and there is nothing wrong in it. + +This second sutra says, "WHEN IN SUCH EMBRACE YOUR SENSES ARE SHAKEN +AS LEAVES..." A great wind is blowing and a tree is shaking. Even the roots are +shaking, every leaf is shaking. Just be like a tree. A great wind is blowing, and sex IS a +great wind — a great energy blowing through you. Shake! Vibrate! Allow every cell of +your body to dance, and this should be for both. The beloved is also dancing, every cell +vibrating. Only then can you both meet, and then that meeting is not mental. It is a +meeting of your bio-energies. + + + +Enter this shaking, and while shaking don't remain aloof. Don’t be a spectator, because +mind is the spectator. Don’t stand aloof! Be the shaking, become the shaking. Forget +everything and become the shaking. It is not that your body is shaking: it is YOU, your +whole being. You become the shaking itself. Then there are not two bodies, two minds. +In the beginning, there are two shaking energies, and in the end just a circle — not two. + + +What will happen in this circle? One, you will be part of an existential force — not a +societal mind, but an existential force. You will be part of the whole cosmos. In that +shaking you will be part of the whole cosmos. That moment is of great creation. You are +dissolved as solid bodies. You have become liquid — flowing into each other. The mind is +lost, the division is lost. You have a oneness. + +This is ADVAITA, this is non-duality. And if you cannot feel this non-duality, then all +the philosophies of non-duality are useless. They are just words. Once you know this +non-dual existential moment, then only can you understand the Upanishads. Then only +you can understand the mystics — what they are talking about when they talk of a Cosmic +oneness, a wholeness. Then you are not separate from the world, not alien to it. Then the +existence becomes your home. And with that feeling that "Now I am at home in the +existence," all worries are lost. Then there is no anguish, no struggle, no conflict. This is +what Lao Tzu calls Tao, what Shankara calls ADVAITA. You can choose your own +word for it, but through a deep love embrace it is easy to feel it. But be alive, shaking, +and become the shaking itself. + +The third sutra: + +"EVEN REMEMBERING UNION, WITHOUT THE EMBRACE, THE +TRANSFORMATION ! ’’ + +Once you know this, even the partner is not needed. + +You can simply remember the act and enter into it. But first you must have the feeling. If +you know the feeling, you can enter into the act without the partner. This is a little +difficult, but it happens. And unless it happens, you go on being dependent, a dependency +is created. For so many reasons it happens. If you have had the feeling, if you have +known the moment when you were not there but only a vibrating energy had become one +and there was a circle with the partner, in that moment there was no partner. In that +moment only you are, and for the partner you are not: only he or she is. That oneness is +centered within you; the partner is no more there. And it is easier for women to have this +feeling because they are always making love with closed eyes. + +During this technique, it is good if you have your eyes closed. Then only an inner feeling +of a circle, only an inner feeling of oneness, is there. Then just remember it. Close your +eyes; lie down as if you are with your partner. Just remember and start feeling it. Your +body will begin to shake and vibrate. Allow it! Forget completely that the other is not +there. Move as if the other is present. Only in the beginning is it "as if." Once you know, +then it is not "as if," then the other is there. + +Move as if you are actually going into the love act. Do whatsoever you would have done +with your partner. Scream, move, shake. + + +Soon the circle will be there, and this circle is miraculous. Soon you will feel that the +circle is created, but now this circle is not created with a man and woman. If you are man, + + + +then the whole universe has become woman; if you are woman, then the whole universe +has become man. Now you are in a deep communion with the existence itself, and the +door, the other, is no more there. + +The other is simply a door. While making love to a woman, you are really making love to +existence itself. The woman is just a door, the man is just a door. The other is just a door +for the whole, but you are in such a hurry you never feel it. If you remain in communion, +in deep embrace for hours together, you will forget the other and the other will just +become an extension of the whole. Once this technique is known you can use it alone, +and when you can use it alone it gives you a new freedom — freedom from the other. + +It really happens that the whole existence becomes the other — your beloved, your lover +— and then this technique can be used continuously, and one can remain in constant +communion with the existence. And then you can do it in other dimensions also. Walking +in the morning, you can do it. Then you are in communion with the air, with the rising +sun and the stars and the trees. Staring at the stars in the night, you can do it. Looking at +the moon, you can do it. You can be in the sex act with the whole universe once you +know how it happens. + + +But it is good to start with human beings because they are nearest to you — the nearest +part of the universe. But they are dispensable. You can take a jump and forget the door +completely - "EVEN REMEMBERING UNION, THE TRANSFORMATION" - and +you WILL be transformed, you will become new. + +Tantra uses sex as a vehicle. It is energy; it can be used as a vehicle. It can transform you, +and it can give you transcendental states. But as we are using sex, it looks difficult for us +— because we are using it in a very wrong way, and the wrong way is not natural. Even +animals are better than us: they are using it in a natural way. Our ways are perverted. +Constant hammering on the human mind that sex is sin has created a deep barrier within +you. You never allow yourself a total let-go. Something is always standing aloof +condemning, even for the new generation. They may say they are not burdened, obsessed, +that sex is not a taboo for them, but you cannot unburden your unconscious so easily. It +has been built over centuries and centuries; the whole human past is there. So while you +may not be condemning it as sin consciously, the unconscious is there constantly +condemning it. You are never totally in it. Something is always left out. That left-out part +creates the split. + +Tantra says move in it totally. Just forget yourself, your civilization, your religion, your +culture, your ideology. + +Forget everything. Just move in the sex act: move in it totally; do not leave anything out. +Become absolutely non-thinking. Only then does the awareness happen that you have +become one with someone. And this feeling of oneness can then be detached from the +partner and it can be used with the whole universe. You can be in a sex act with a tree, +with the moon, with anything. Once, you know how to create this circle, it can be created +with anything — even without anything. + +You can create this circle within yourself because man is both man and woman, and +woman is both woman and man. You are both because you were created by two, You +were created by man and woman both, so half of you remains the other. You can forget +everything completely, and the circle can be created within you. Once the circle is +created within you — your man is meeting your woman, the inner woman is meeting the + + + +inner man — you are in an embrace within yourself. And only when this circle is created +is real celibacy attained. Otherwise all celibacies are just perversions, and then they +create their own problems. When this circle is created inside, you are freed. + +This is what tantra says: "Sex is the deepest bondage, yet it can be used as a vehicle for +the highest freedom." Tantra says poison can be used as medicine, but wisdom is needed. +So do not condemn anything. Rather, use it. And do not be against anything. + +Find out ways how it can be used and transfonned. Tantra is a deep, total acceptance of +life. It is the only approach of its kind. All over the world, in all the centuries that have +gone by, tantra is unique. It says don’t throw anything and don’t be against anything and +don’t create any conflict, because with any conflict you will be destructive with yourself. +All the religions are against sex, afraid of it, because it is such a great energy. Once you +are in it you are no more, and then the current will take you anywhere. That is why the +fear. So create a barrier in which you and the current become two, and do not allow this +vital energy to have any possession over you: be the master of it. + +Only tantra says that this mastery is going to be false, diseased, pathological, because you +cannot really be divided with this current. You are it! So all divisions will be false, +arbitrary, and basically, no division is possible because you are the current — a part and +parcel of it, just a wave in it. You can become frozen and you can separate yourself from +the current, but that frozenness will be deadness. And humanity has become dead. No one +is really alive; you are just dead weights floating in the stream. Melt! + +Tantra says try to melt. Do not become like icebergs: melt and become one with the river. +Becoming one with the river, feeling one with the river, merging in the river, be aware +and there will be transformation. + +There IS transformation. Transformation is not through conflict; it is through awareness. +These three techniques are very, very scientific, but then sex becomes something other +than what you know. Then it is not a temporary relief; then it is not throwing energy out. +Then there is no end to it. It becomes a meditative circle. + +A few more related techniques: + +"ON JOYOUSLY SEEING A LONG ABSENT FRIEND, PERMEATE THIS JOY." +Enter this joy and become one with it — any joy, any happiness. This is just an example: +"On joyously seeing a long absent friend..." Suddenly you see a friend you have not seen +for many, many days or many, many years. A sudden joy grips you. But your attention +will be on the friend, not on your joy. Then you are missing something, and this joy will +be momentary. Your attention is focused on the friend: you will start talking, +remembering things, and you will miss this joy and this joy will go. + +When you see a friend and suddenly feel a joy arising in your heart, concentrate on this +joy. Feel it and become it, and meet the friend while being aware and filled with your joy. +Let the friend be just on the periphery, and you remain centered in your feeling of +happiness. + +This can be done in many other situations. The sun is rising, and suddenly you feel +something rising within you. Then forget the sun; let it remain on the periphery. + +You be centered in your own feeling of rising energy. The moment you look at it, it will +spread. It will become your whole body, your whole being. And do not just be an +observer of it; merge into it. There are very few moments when you feel joy, happiness, + + + +bliss, but you go on missing them because you become object-centered. + +Whenever there is joy, you feel that it is coming from without. You have met a friend: of +course, it appears that the joy is coming from your friend, from seeing him. That is not +the actual case. The joy is always within you. The friend has just become a situation. The +friend has helped it to come out, has helped you to see that it is there. And this is not only +with joy, but with everything: with anger, with sadness, with misery, with happiness, +with everything, it is so. Others are only situations in which things that are hidden in you +are expressed. They are not causes; they are not causing something in you. Whatsoever is +happening, is happening TO YOU. It has always been there; it is only that meeting with +this friend has become a situation in which whatsoever was hidden has come out in the +open — has come out. From the hidden sources it has become apparent, manifest. +Whenever this happens remain centered in the inner feeling, and then you will have a +different attitude about everything in life. + +Even with negative emotions, do this. When you are angry, do not be centered on the +person who has aroused it. + +Let him be on the periphery. You just become anger. Feel anger in its totality; allow it to +happen within. Don’t rationalize; don’t say that this man has created it. Do not condemn +the man. He has just become the situation. And feel grateful towards him that he has +helped something which was hidden to come into the open. He has hit you somewhere, +and a wound was there hidden. Now you know it, so become the wound. + +With negative or positive, with any emotion, use this, and there will be a great change in +you. If the emotion is negative, you will be freed of it by being aware that it is within +you. If the emotion is positive, you will become the emotion itself. If it is joy, you will +become joy. If it is anger, the anger will dissolve. + +And this is the difference between negative and positive emotions: if you become aware +of a certain emotion, and by your becoming aware the emotion dissolves, it is negative. If +by your becoming aware of a certain emotion you then become the emotion, if the +emotion then spreads and becomes your being, it is positive. Awareness works differently +in both cases. If it is a poisonous emotion, you are relieved of it through awareness. If it +is good, blissful, ecstatic, you become one with it. Awareness deepens it. + +So to me this is the criterion: if something is deepened by your awareness, it is something +good. If something is dissolved through awareness, it is something bad. + +That which cannot remain in awareness is sin and that which grows in awareness is +virtue. Virtue and sin are not social concepts, they are inner realizations. + +Use your awareness. It is just as if there is darkness and you bring in light: the darkness +will be no more there. Just by bringing light in, the darkness is no more there, because, +really, it was not. It was negative, just an absence of light. But many things will become +manifest which are there. Just by bringing in light, these shelves, these books, these +walls, will not disappear. In darkness they were not; you could not see them. If you bring +light in, darkness will be no more there, but that which is real will be revealed. Through +awareness all that is negative like darkness will dissolve — hatred, anger, sadness, +violence. Then love, joy, ecstasy, will, for the first time, become revealed to you. So, + +"ON JOYOUSLY SEEING A LONG ABSENT FRIEND, PERMEATE THIS JOY.” + +The fifth technique: + +’’WHEN EATING OR DRINKING, BECOME THE TASTE OF THE FOOD OR +DRINK, AND BE FILLED.” + + + +We go on eating things; we cannot live without them. But we eat them very +unconsciously, automatically, robot-like. If the taste is not lived, you are just stuffing. Go +slow, and be aware of the taste. And only when you go slow can you be aware. Do not +just go on swallowing things. Taste them unhurriedly and become the taste. + +When you feel sweetness, become that sweetness. And then it can be felt all over the +body — not just in the mouth, not just on the tongue, it can be felt all over the body! A +certain sweetness — or anything else — is spreading in ripples. Whatsoever you are eating, +feel the taste and become the taste. + +This is how tantra appears to be quite the contrary from other traditions. Jainas say, "No +taste — AS WAD." Mahatma Gandhi had it as a rule in his ashram — "AS WAD: do not +taste anything. Eat, but do not taste; forget the taste. Eating is a necessity, but do it in a +mechanical way. Taste is desire, so do not taste." Tantra says taste it as much as possible; +be more sensitive, alive. And not only be sensitive — become the taste. + +With ASWAD, with no taste, your senses will be deadened. They will become less and +less sensitive. And with less sensitivity, you will not be able to feel your body, you will +not be able to feel your feelings. Then you will just remain centered in the head. This +centeredness in the head is the split. Tantra says do not create any division within +yourself. It is beautiful to taste; it is beautiful to be sensitive. And if you are more +sensitive you will be more alive, and if you are more alive, then more life will enter your +inner being. You will be more open. + +You can eat things without tasting; it is not difficult. You can touch someone without +touching; it is not difficult. + +We are already doing it. You shake hands with someone without touching him because to +touch, you have to come to the hand, you have to move to the hand. You have to become +your fingers and your palm as if you, your soul, have come to the hand. Only then can +you touch. You can take someone's hand in your hand and withdraw. You can withdraw; +then the dead hand is there. It appears to be touching, but it is not touching. + +We are not touching! We are afraid to touch somebody because symbolically touch has +become sexual. You may be standing in a crowd, in a tram, in a railway compartment, +touching many persons, but you are not touching them and they are not touching you. +Only bodies are there in contact, but you are withdrawn. And you can feel the difference: +if you really touch someone in the crowd, he will feel offended. Your body can touch, but +you must not move in that body. You must remain aloof — as if not in the body, as if +there is only a dead body touching. + +This insensitivity is bad. It is bad because you are defending yourself against life. You +are so much afraid of death, and you are already dead. You need not really be afraid +because no one is going to die; you are already dead. And that is why you are afraid — +because you have not lived. You have been missing life and death is coming. + +A person who is "alive" will not be afraid of death because he is living. + +When you are really living there is no fear of death. You can even live death. When death +comes, you will be so sensitive to it that you will enjoy it. It is going to be a great +experience. If you are alive you can even live death, and then death is no more there. If +you can even live death, if you can even be sensitive to your dying body as you are +withdrawing to the center and dissolving, if you can live even this, then you have become +deathless. + + + +"WHEN EATING OR DRINKING, BECOME THE TASTE OF THE FOOD OR +DRINK, AND BE FILLED BY THE TASTE:" When drinking water, feel the coolness. +Close your eyes, drink it slowly, taste it. Feel the coolness and feel that you have become +that coolness, because the coolness is being transferred to you from the water; it is +becoming a part of your body. Your mouth is touching, your tongue is touching, and the +coolness is transferred. Allow it to happen to the whole of your body. Allow its ripples to +spread, and you will feel a coolness all over your body. In this way your sensitivity can +grow, and you can become more alive and more filled. + +We are frustrated, feeling vacant, empty, and we go on talking that life is empty. But we +are the reasons why it is empty. We are not filling it and we are not allowing anything to +fill it. We have an armor around us — a defense armor. We are afraid to be vulnerable, so +we go on defending against everything. + +And then we become tombs — dead things. + +Tantra says be alive, more alive, because life is God. There is no other God than life. Be +more alive, and you will be more divine. Be totally alive, and there is no death for you. + +THE END. + + + +Chapter 34: "Cosmic orgasm" through Tantra + + +BEGIN.... + +Before I take your questions some other points have to be clarified, because those points +will help you understand more what tantra means. Tantra is not a moral concept. It is +neither moral nor immoral. It is amoral. It is a science, and science is neither. Your +moralities and concepts concerning moral behavior are irrelevant for tantra. Tantra is not +concerned with how one should behave; it is not concerned with ideals. It is concerned +basically with what is, with what you are. This distinction has to be understood deeply. +Morality is concerned with ideals — how you should be, what you should be. Therefore, +morality is basically condemning. You are never the ideal so you are condemned. Every +morality is guilt-creating. You can never become the ideal; you are always lagging +behind. The gap will always be there because the ideal is the impossible, and through +morality it becomes more impossible. The ideal is there in the future, and you are here as +you are, and you go on comparing. You are never the perfect man; something is always +lacking. Then you feel guilt; you feel a self-condemnation. + +One thing, tantra is against self-condemnation because condemnation can never +transfonn you. Condemnation can only create hypocrisy. Then you try to pretend, to +show, that you are what you are not. Hypocrisy means you are the real man, not the ideal +man, but you pretend, you try to show, that you are the ideal man. + +Then you have a split within you; you have a false face. The unreal man is bom, and +tantra is basically a search for the real man, not for the unreal man. + +Of necessity, every morality creates hypocrisy. It will do so inevitably. Hypocrisy will +remain with morality. It is part of it — the shadow. This will look paradoxical because +moralists are the men who condemn hypocrisy the most, and they are the creators of it. +And hypocrisy cannot disappear from the earth unless morality disappears. They both +will exist together; they are two aspects of the same coin. Morality gives you the ideal +and you are not the ideal; that is why the ideal is given to you. Then you start feeling that +you are wrong, and that this wrongness is natural. It is given to you. You are born with it, +and you cannot immediately do anything about it. You cannot transform it; it is not so +easy. You can only suppress it; that is easy. + +But there are two things you can do. You can create a false face; you can pretend to be +something you are not. That saves you. Then you can move more easily in the society — +more conveniently. And inwardly you have to suppress the real because the unreal can be +imposed only if the real is suppressed. So your reality goes on moving downward into the +unconscious and your unreality becomes your conscious. Your unreal part becomes more +dominant and the real recedes back. + +You are divided, and the more you try to pretend, the greater will be the gap. + +The child is born as one, whole. That is why every child is so beautiful. The beauty is +because of wholeness. The child has no gap, no split, no divisions, no fragments. The +child is one. The real and unreal are not there. The child is simply real, authentic. You +cannot say that the child is moral. The child is neither moral nor immoral. He is just +unaware that there is anything moral or immoral. The moment he becomes aware, a split +starts. Then the child begins behaving in unreal ways because to be real becomes more +and more difficult. + + + +This happens of necessity, remember, because the family has to regulate, the parents have +to regulate. The child has to be civilized, educated, given manners, cultivated; otherwise +it will be impossible for the child to move in the society. He has to be told, "Do this; don’t +do that." And when we say, "Do this," the child's reality may not be ready to do it. It may +not be real; there may not be any real desire within the child to do it. And when we say, +"Don't do this or don't do that," the child's nature may like to do it. + +We condemn the real and we enforce the unreal, because the unreal is going to be helpful +in an unreal society and the unreal is going to be convenient. Where everyone is false, the +real is not going to be convenient. A real child will be in a basic difficulty with the +society because the whole society is unreal. + +This is a vicious circle. We are bom in a society, and hitherto not a single society has +existed on the earth which is real. And this is vicious! A child is born in a society, and a +society is already there with its fixed rules, regulations, behaviors and moralities which +the child has to learn. + +When he will grow he will become false. Then children will be born to him, and he will +help make them false, and this goes on and on. What to do? We cannot change the +society. Or if we try to change the society, we will not be there when the society will be +changed. It will take an eternity of time. What to do? + +The individual can become aware of this basic split within: that the real has been +suppressed and the unreal has been imposed. This is pain, this is suffering, this is hell. +You cannot get any satisfaction through the unreal because through the unreal only +unreal satisfactions are possible, and this is natural. Only through the real can real +satisfactions happen. Through the real you can reach reality; through the real you can +reach the truth. Through the unreal you can only reach more and more hallucinations, +illusions, dreams, and through dreams you can deceive yourself, but you can never be +satisfied. + +For example, in a dream, if you feel thirsty, you may dream you are drinking water. This +will be helpful and convenient for the sleep to continue. If this dream where you dream +you are drinking water is not there, your sleep will be broken. + +A real thirst is there. It will break the sleep; the sleep will be disturbed. Dream is a help; +it gives you the feeling that you are drinking water. But the water is false. Your thirst is +simply deceived; it is not removed. You may continue to sleep, but the thirst is there +suppressed. + +This is happening not only in sleep: in your whole life this is happening. You are +searching for things through the unreal personality which is not there, which is just a +facade. If you do not get them, you will be in misery; if you get them, then too you will +be in misery. If you do not get them the misery will be lesser-remember. If you get them, +the misery will be deeper and more. + +Psychologists say that because of this unreal personality we basically never want to reach +the goal — never want to reach — because if you reach the goal you will be totally +frustrated. You live in hope; in hope you can continue. Hope is a dream. You never reach +the goal, so you never come to realize that the goal is false. + +A poor man struggling for riches is more happy in the struggle because in the struggle +there is hope. And with the unreal personality only hope is happiness. If the poor man +gets riches, he will become hopeless. Now frustration will be the natural consequence. +Riches will be there, but no satisfaction. He will have achieved the goal, but nothing will + + + +have happened. His hopes are shattered. + + +That is why the moment a society becomes affluent it becomes disturbed. + +If America is so much disturbed today, it is because hopes are achieved, goals are +achieved, and now you cannot deceive yourself any more. So if in America the younger +generation is revolting against all the goals of the older generation, it is because of this: +that they all proved nonsense. + +In India we cannot conceive of this. We cannot conceive of young people voluntarily +going poor — going hippie. Voluntarily going poor? We cannot conceive of it. We still +have hope. We are hoping for the future: that someday the country will become rich and +then there will be heaven. Heaven is always in the hoping. + +Because of this unreal personality, whatsoever you try, whatsoever you do, whatsoever +you see, becomes unreal. Tantra says truth can happen to you only if you are again +grounded in the real. But to be grounded in the real you have to be very courageous with +yourself because the unreal is convenient and the unreal is so much cultivated and your +mind is so much conditioned, that you will become afraid of the real. + +Someone has asked, + +Question 1 + +"YOU SAID YESTERDAY TO BE IN THE LOVE ACT TOTALLY - TO ENJOY, TO +FEEL THE BLISS OF IT, TO REMAIN IN IT, AND WHEN THE BODY STARTS +SHAKING, TO BE THE SHAKING. THEN WHAT ARE YOU TEACHING US - +INDULGENCE?" + +This is perversion! This is the unreal personality speaking to you. + +The unreal personality is always against enjoying anything. It is always against you: you +must not enjoy. It is always for sacrificing things, for your sacrificing yourself for others. +It looks beautiful because you have been brought up in it: "Sacrifice yourself for others." +This is altruism. If you are trying to enjoy yourself this is selfish. And the moment +someone says, "This is selfish," it becomes a sin. + +But I tell you, tantra is a basically different approach. Tantra says that unless you can +enjoy yourself you cannot help anyone to enjoy. Unless you are really contented with +yourself, you cannot serve others; you cannot help others toward their contentment. +Unless you are overflowing with your own bliss you are a danger to society, because a +person who sacrifices always becomes a sadist. + +If your mother goes on talking to you and says that "I have sacrificed myself for you," +she will torture you. If the husband goes on saying to the wife that "I am sacrificing," he +will be a sadistic torturer. He will torture because sacrifice is just a trick to torture the +other. + +So those who are always sacrificing are very dangerous — potentially dangerous. Be +aware of them, and do not sacrifice. The very word is ugly. Enjoy yourself; be bliss- +filled. And when you are overflowing with your own bliss, that bliss will reach to others +also. But that is not a sacrifice. + +No one is obliged to you; no one needs to thank you. Rather, you will feel grateful to +others because they have been participating in your bliss. Words like 'sacrifice', 'duty', +'service' are ugly; they are violent. + +Tantra says that unless you are filled with light, how can you help others to be + + + +enlightened? Be selfish; only then can you be altruistic. Otherwise the whole concept of +altruism is nonsense. Be happy; only then can you help others to be happy. If you are sad, +unhappy, bitter, you are going to be violent with others and you will create misery for +others. + +You may become a MAHATMA, a so-called great saint; that is not very difficult. But +look at your MAHATMAS. They are trying in every way to torture everyone who comes +to them, but their torturing is very deceptive. They torture you for your own sake; they +torture you for your own good. And because they are torturing themselves you cannot say +to them, "You are preaching something to us which you are not practicing." They are +already practicing it. They are torturing themselves; now they can torture you. And when +a torture is for your own good, that is the most dangerous torture: you cannot escape it. +And what is wrong with enjoying yourself? What is wrong in being happy? If there is +anything wrong it is always in your unhappiness, because an unhappy person creates +ripples of unhappiness ah around him. + +Be happy! And the sex act, the act of love, can be one of the deepest means through +which bliss can be attained. + +Tantra is not teaching sexuality. It is simply saying that sex can be a source of bliss. And +once you know that bliss, you can go further because now you are grounded in reality. +One is not to remain with sex forever, but you can use sex as a jumping point. That is +what tantra means: you can use sex as a jumping point. And once you have known the +ecstasy of sex, you can understand what mystics have been talking about — a greater +orgasm, a cosmic orgasm. + +Meera is dancing. You cannot understand her; you cannot even understand her songs. +They are sexual; their symbology is sexual. This is bound to be because in human life the +sex act is the only act in which you come to feel a non-duality, in which you come to feel +a deep oneness, in which the past disappears and the future disappears and only the +present moment — the only real moment — remains. So ah those mystics who have really +known oneness with the divine, oneness with existence itself, they have always used +sexual terms and symbols for their experience to express it. There is no other symbology; +there is no other symbology which comes near to it. + +Sex is just the beginning, not the end. But if you miss the beginning, you will miss the +end also, and you cannot escape the beginning to reach the end. + + +Tantra says take life naturally; do not be unreal. Sex is there as a deep possibility, a great +potentiality. Use it! And what is wrong in being happy in it? Really, ah moralities are +against happiness. Someone is happy, and you feel something has gone wrong. When +someone is sad, everything is okay. We live in a neurotic society where everyone is sad. +When you are sad, everyone is happy because everyone can sympathize with you. When +you are happy, everyone is at a loss. What to do with you? When someone sympathizes +with you, look at his face. The face gleams; a subtle shining comes to the face. He is +happy sympathizing. If you are happy, then there is no possibility for this. Your +happiness creates sadness in others; your unhappiness creates happiness. This is neurosis! +The very foundation seems to be mad. + +Tantra says be real, be authentic to yourself. Your happiness is not bad; it is good. It is +not sin! Only sadness is sin, only to be miserable is sin. To be happy is virtue because a +happy person will not create unhappiness for others. Only a happy person can be a + + + +ground for others' happiness. + +Secondly, when I say that tantra is neither moral nor immoral I mean that tantra is +basically a science. It looks at you, at what you are. It means that tantra is not trying to +transfonn you, but it actually does transfonn you through reality. The difference between +magic and science is the same as between morality and tantra. + +Magic also tries to transform things simply through words, without knowing the reality. +The magician can say that now the rains will stop; he cannot really stop them. Or he can +say that rains will come — but he cannot start them, he can just go on using words. +Sometimes coincidences will be there, and then he will feel powerful. And if the thing is +not going to happen according to his magic prophecy he can always say, "What has gone +wrong?" That possibility is always hidden in his profession. With magic everything starts +with "if." He can say, "If everyone is good, virtuous, then the rains will come on a +particular day." If the rains come it is okay; if the rains are not coming then "everyone is +not virtuous, there is someone who is a sinner". + +Even in this century, the twentieth century, a person like Mahatma Gandhi could say, +when there was famine in Bihar, "It is because of the sin of the people living in Bihar that +the famine has come" — as if the whole world is not sinning, only Bihar! Magic starts +with "if," and that "if' is great and big. + +Science never starts with "if because science first tries to know what is real — what +reality is, what the real is. Once the real is known it can be transformed. Once you know +what electricity is, it can be changed, transfonned, used. A magician does not know what +electricity is. Without knowing electricity, he is going to transfonn, he is thinking to +transform! Those kind of prophecies are just false — illusions. + + +Morality is just like magic. It goes on talking about the perfect man, and without +knowing what man is — the real man. The perfect man remains as a dream. It is used just +to condemn the real man. Man never reaches it. + +Tantra is science. Tantra says first know what the reality is, what man is, and don’t create +values and don't create ideals right now: first know what is. Do not think of the "ought"; +just think of the "is." And once the "is" is known, then you change it. Then you have the +secret. + +For example, tantra says do not try to go against sex, because if you go against sex and +try to create a state of BRAHMACHARYA — celibacy, purity, it is impossible. It is just +magical. Without knowing what sex energy is, without knowing of what sex is +constituted, without going deep into the reality of it, the secrets of it, you can create an +ideal of BRAHMACHARYA. Then what will you do? You will simply suppress. And a +person who is suppressing sex is more sexual than a person who is indulging in it because +through indulgence the energy is released. Through suppression it is there, moving in +your system continuously. + +A person who suppresses sex starts seeing sex everywhere. Everything becomes sexual. +Not that everything is sexual, but now he projects. Now he projects! His own hidden +energy is now projected. Everywhere he will look he will see sex, and because he is +condemning himself he will start condemning everyone. + + +You cannot find a moralist who is not violently condemning. He is condemning +everyone; to him everyone is wrong. Then he feels good, his ego is fulfilled. Why is + + + +everyone wrong? Because he sees everywhere the same thing he is suppressing. His own +mind will become more and more sexual, and more and more he will be afraid. This +BRAHMACHARYA is perversion, it is unnatural. + +A different quality, a different type of BRAHMACHARYA, happens to the follower of +tantra, but the very process is totally, diametrically opposite. Tantra first teaches how to +move in sex, how to know it, how to feel it, how to come to the deepest possibility hidden +in it, to the climax, how to find the essential beauty, the essential happiness and bliss that +is hidden there. + +Once you know that secret you can transcend it because, really, in a deep sexual orgasm +it is not sex which gives you bliss, it is something else. Sex is just a situation. Something +else is giving you the euphoria, the ecstasy. That something else can be divided into three +elements. But when I speak about those elements, do not think that you can understand +them just from my words. They must become part of your experience. As concepts they +are useless. + +Because of three basic elements in sex you come to a blissful moment. Those three are, +firstly, timelessness: you transcend time completely. There is no time. You forget time +completely; time ceases for you. + +Not that time ceases, it ceases for YOU; you are not in it. There is no past, no future. In +this very moment, here and now, the whole existence is concentrated. This moment +becomes the only real moment. If you can make this moment the only real moment +without sex, then there is no need of sex. Through meditation it happens. + +Secondly, in sex for the first time you lose your ego, you become egoless. So all those +who are very much egoistic, they are all always against sex, because in sex they have to +lose their egos. You are not, nor is there the other. You and your beloved are both lost +into something else. A new reality evolves, a new unit comes into existence in which the +old two are lost — completely lost. The ego is afraid. You are no more there. If without +sex you can come to a moment when you are not, then there is no need of it. + +And thirdly, in sex you are natural for the first time. The unreal is lost, the faces, the +facades are lost; the society, the culture, the civilization, is lost. You are a part of nature. +As trees are, as animals are, as stars are, you are a part of nature. You are in a greater +something — the cosmos, the Tao. You are floating in it. You cannot even swim in it; +YOU are not. You are just floating — being taken by the current. + +These three things give you the ecstasy. Sex is just a situation in which it happens +naturally. + +Once you know and once you can feel these elements, you can create these elements +independently of sex. All meditation is essentially the experience of sex without sex, but +you have to go through it. It must become part of your experience, not just be there as +concepts, ideas, thoughts. + +Tantra is not for sex, tantra is to transcend. But you can transcend only through +experience — existential experience — not through ideology. Only through tantra does +BRAHMACHARYA happen. This looks paradoxical, but it is not. Only through +knowledge does transcendence happen. Ignorance cannot help you towards +transcendence; it can only help you towards hypocrisy. + +Now I will take more questions. Someone has asked, + +Question 2 + +"HOW OFTEN SHOULD ONE INDULGE IN SEX IN ORDER TO HELP AND NOT + + + +TO HINDER THE MEDITATION PROCESS?" + +The question arises because we go on misunderstanding. Your sex act and the tantric sex +act are basically different. Your sex act is to relieve; it is just like sneezing out a good +sneeze. The energy is thrown out and you are unburdened. It is destructive, it is not +creative. It is good — therapeutic. It helps you to be relaxed, but nothing more. + +The tantric sex act is basically, diametrically opposite and different. It is not to relieve, it +is not to throw energy out. It is to remain in the act without ejaculation, without throwing +energy out; to remain in the act merged — just at the beginning part of the act, not the end +part. + +This changes the quality; the complete quality is different then. + +Try to understand two things. There are two types of climaxes, two types of orgasm. One +type of orgasm is known. You reach to a peak of excitement, then you cannot go further: +the end has come. The excitement reaches to a point where it becomes non-voluntary. + +The energy jumps into you and goes out. You are relieved of it, unburdened. The load is +thrown; you can relax and sleep. + +You are using it like a tranquilizer. It is a natural tranquilizer: a good sleep will follow — +if your mind is not burdened by religion. Otherwise even the tranquilizer is destroyed. If +your mind is not burdened by religion, only then can sex be a tranquilizing thing. If you +feel guilt, even your sleep will be disturbed. You will feel depression, you will start +condemning yourself and you will begin to take oaths that now you won't indulge +anymore. Then your sleep will become a nightmare afterwards. If you are a natural being +not too much burdened by religion and morality, only then can sex be used as a +tranquilizer. + +This is one type of orgasm — coming to the peak of excitement. Tantra is centered on +another type of orgasm. If we call the first kind a peak orgasm, you can call the tantric +orgasm a valley orgasm. In it you are not coming to the peak of excitement, but to the +very deepest valley of relaxation. Excitement has to be used for both in the beginning. + +That is why I say that in the beginning both are the same, but the ends are totally +different. + +Excitement has to be used for both: either you are going toward the peak of excitement or +to the valley of relaxation. For the first, excitement has to be intense — more and more +intense. You have to grow in it; you have to help it to grow towards the peak. In the +second, excitement is just a beginning. And once the man has entered, both lover and +beloved can relax. No movement is needed. They can relax in a loving embrace. When +the man feels or the woman feels that the erection is going to be lost, only then is a little +movement and excitement required. But then again relax. You can prolong this deep +embrace for hours with no ejaculation, and then both can fall into deep sleep together. +This — THIS — is a valley orgasm. Both are relaxed, and they meet as two relaxed beings. +In the ordinary sexual orgasm you meet as two excited beings — tense, full of excitement, +trying to unburden yourselves. The ordinary sexual orgasm looks like madness; the +tantric orgasm is a deep, relaxing meditation. Then there is no question of how often one +should indulge. You can indulge as much as you like because no energy is lost. Rather, +energy is gained. + +You may not be aware of it, but this is a fact of biology, of bio-energy, that man and +woman are opposite forces. Negative-positive, yin-yang, or whatsoever you call them, +they are challenging to each other. + + + +And when they both meet in a deep relaxation, they revitalize each other. They both +revitalize each other, they both become generators, they both feel livelier, they both +become radiant with new energy, and nothing is lost. Just by meeting with the opposite +pole energy is renewed. + +The tantric love act can be done as much as you like. The ordinary sex act cannot be done +as much as you like because you are losing energy in it, and your body will have to wait +to regain it. And when you regain it, you will only lose it again. This looks absurd. The +whole life is spent in gaining and losing, regaining and losing: it is just like an obsession. +The second thing to be remembered: you may or may not have observed that when you +look at animals you can never see them enjoying sex. In intercourse, they are not +enjoying themselves. Look at baboons, monkeys, dogs or any kind of animals. In their +sex act you cannot see that they are feeling blissful or enjoying it — you cannot! It seems +to be just a mechanical act, a natural force pushing them towards it. If you have seen +monkeys in intercourse, after the intercourse they will separate. Look at their faces: there +is no ecstasy in them, it is as if nothing has happened. When the energy forces itself, +when the energy is too much, they throw it. + +The ordinary sex act is just like this, but moralists have been saying quite the contrary. + +They say, "Do not indulge, do not 'enjoy'." They say, "This is as animals do." This is +wrong! Animals never enjoy; only man can enjoy. And the deeper you can enjoy, the +higher is the kind of humanity that is born. And if your sex act can become meditative, +ecstatic, the highest is touched. But remember tantra: it is a valley orgasm, it is not a peak +experience. It is a valley experience! + +In the West, Abraham Maslow has made this tenn "peak experience" very famous. You +go into excitement towards the peak, and then you fall. That is why, after every sex act, +you feel a fall. And it is natural: you are falling from a peak. You will never feel that after +a tantric sex experience. Then you are not falling. You cannot fall any further because +you have been in the valley. Rather, you are rising. + +When you come back after a tantric sex act, you have risen, not fallen. You feel filled +with energy, more vital, more alive, radiant. And that ecstasy will last for hours, even for +days. It depends on how deeply you were in it. If you move into it, sooner or later you +will realize that ejaculation is wastage of energy. No need of it — unless you need +children. And with a tantric sex experience, you will feel a deep relaxation the whole day. +One tantric sex experience, and even for days you will feel relaxed — at ease, at home, +non-violent, non-angry, non-depressed. And this type of person is never a danger to +others. + +If he can, he will help others to be happy. If he cannot, at least he will not make anyone +unhappy. + +Only tantra can create a new man, and this man who can know timelessness, egolessness +and deep non-duality with existence will grow. A dimension has opened. It is not far +away, the day is not very far away, when sex will simply disappear. When sex disappears +without your knowledge, when suddenly one day, you realize that sex has disappeared +completely and there is no lust, then BRAHMACHARYA is born. But this is arduous. It +looks arduous because of too much false teaching, and you feel afraid of it also because +of your mind's conditioning. + +Of two things we are very much afraid — sex and death — and both are basic. A really +religious seeker will enter both. He will experience sex to know what it is because to + + + +know sex is to know life. And he would also like to know what death is because unless +death is known you cannot know what eternal life is. If you can enter sex to its very +center you will know what life is, and if you can enter into death voluntarily, to its very +center, then the moment you touch the center of death you become eternal. Then you are +immortal because death is something that happens just on the periphery. + +Sex and death both are basic for a real seeker, but for ordinary humanity both are taboo. +No one talks about them, and both are basic and both are deeply related. + +They are so deeply related that even upon entering sex you enter a certain death — +because you are dying. The ego is disappearing; time is disappearing; your individuality +is disappearing. You are dying! Sex is also a subtle death. And if you can know that sex +is a subtle death, death can become a great sexual orgasm. + +A Socrates entering death is not afraid. Rather, he is very much enthusiastic, thrilled, +excited to know what death is. There is a deep welcome in his heart. Why? Because if +you have known the small death of sex and you have known the bliss that follows it, you +would like to know the greater death, the greater bliss that is hidden behind it. But for us +both are taboo. For tantra, both are basic dimensions for search. One has to go through +them. + +Someone has asked, + +Question 3 + +"IF ONE EXPERIENCES KUNDALINI - THE RISING OF ENERGY UP THE +SPINAL PASSAGE - DOES NOT IT DEPLETE ONE’S MEDITATIVE ENERGIES +TO HAVE ORGASM?" + +All the questions are basically without understanding of what the tantric sex act is. +Ordinarily, it is so. If your energy, your kundalini, goes up, rises and rushes up towards +the head, you cannot have an ordinary orgasm. And if you try to have it, you will be in a +deep conflict within, because energy is moving up and you are forcing it down. But the +tantric orgasm is not a difficulty. It will be a help. + +Energy moving up is not contradictory to tantric orgasm. You can relax, and that +relaxation with your beloved will help the energy move higher. + +In the ordinary sex act it is a difficulty. That is why all those techniques which are not +tantric are against sex — because they do not know that a valley orgasm is possible. They +know only one kind — the ordinary orgasm, and then it is a problem for them. For yoga it +is a problem because yoga is trying to force your sex energy upwards. Your sex energy +moving upwards is what is called kundalini. + +In the sex act it moves downwards. Yoga will say to be a celibate, because if you are +doing both — yoga and indulging in sex — you are creating chaos in your system. On the +one hand you are trying to pull energy up, and on the other hand you are "throwing +energy out — down. You are creating chaos. + +That is why yoga techniques are against sex, but tantra is not against sex because tantra +has a different type of orgasm, a valley orgasm, which can help. And no chaos, no +conflict, is created; rather, it will be helpful. If you are escaping, if you are a man and you +are escaping from woman or if you are a woman escaping from man, then whatsoever +you do the other remains in your mind and goes on pulling you down. This is +paradoxical, but this is a truth. + +While in a deep embrace with your beloved you can forget the other. + + + +Only then do you forget the other. A man forgets that woman exists; a woman forgets +that man exists. Only in a deep embrace the other is no more, and when the other is no +more your energy can flow easily. Otherwise the other goes on pulling it down. + +So yoga and ordinary techniques try to get you to escape from the other — the opposite +sex. You have to escape. You have to be aware — continuously struggling and +controlling. But if you are against the other sex, that very "againstness" is a constant +strain and goes on pulling you down. + +Tantra says no strain is needed; be relaxed with the other. In that relaxed moment the +other disappears and your energy can flow up, but it flows up only when you are in a +valley. It flows down when you are at a peak. + +One more question: + +Question 4 + +"LAST NIGHT YOU SAID THAT THE FULL ACT SHOULD BE SLOW AND +UNHURRIED, BUT YOU ALSO SAID THAT ONE SHOULD NOT HAVE ANY +CONTROL OVER THE SEXUAL ACT AND THAT ONE SHOULD BECOME +TOTAL. THIS CONFUSES ME. PLEASE EXPLAIN THESE TWO THINGS." + +It is not control. Control is a different thing and relaxation is totally different. In sex, you +are relaxing in it, not controlling it. If you are controlling it, there will be no relaxation. If +you are controlling it, sooner or later you will be hurried to finish it because control is a +strain. And every strain creates tension, and tension creates a necessity, a need, to release. + +It is not a control; you are not resisting something. You are simply not in a hurry because +sex is not happening in order to move somewhere. You are not going somewhere. It is +just a play; there is no goal. Nothing is to be reached, so why hurry? + +But a man who is always, in every act, present totally... If you are hurried in everything, +you will be hurried in your sex act also, because YOU will be there. A person who is +very much time-conscious will be hurried in his sex act also — as if time is being wasted. +So we ask for instant coffee and for instant sex. With coffee it is good, but with sex it is +simply nonsense. There can be no instant sex. It is not work and it is not something +which you can hurry. Through hurry you will destroy it; you will miss the very point. +Enjoy it because through it a timelessness is to be felt. If you are in a hurry, then +timelessness cannot be felt. + +Tantra says go unhurriedly, slowly enjoying it just as if you are going for a walk in the +morning — not as if you are going to the office. That is a different thing. When you are +going to the office you are in a hurry to reach somewhere, and when you are on a walk in +the morning you are not in a hurry because you are not going anywhere. You are simply +going, there is no hurry, there is no goal. You can return from any point. + +This unhurriedness is basic to create the valley; otherwise the peak will be created. + +And when this is said, it does not mean that you have to control. You are not to control +your excitement, because that is contradictory. You CANNOT control excitement. If you +control it, you are creating a double excitement. Just relax! Take it as a play; do not make +any end. The beginning is enough. + +In the act, close your eyes. Feel the other's body, feel the other's energy flowing towards +you and be merged in it, melt in it. It will come. The old habit may persist for a few days; +then it will go. But do not force it to go. Just go on relaxing, relaxing, relaxing, and if +there is no ejaculation do not feel that something has gone wrong. A man feels that + + + +something has gone wrong if there is no ejaculation.; he tends to feel that something has +gone wrong. Nothing has gone wrong! And do not feel that you have missed something: +you have not missed. In the beginning it will be felt as if you are missing something, +because the excitement and the peak will not be there. Before the valley comes you will +feel that you are missing something, but this is just an old habit. Within a period, within a +month or three weeks, the valley will start appearing, and when the valley appears you +will forget your peaks. No peak is worth this. But you have to wait, and do not force it +and do not control it. Just relax. + +Relaxation is a problem — because when we say, "Relax," in the mind it is translated as if +some effort is to be made. + +Our language gives this appearance. I was reading one book. The book is entitled, YOU +MUST RELAX! You MUST! The very "must" will not allow you to relax, because when +it becomes a goal, you "must," and if you are not able you will feel frustrated. The very +"must" gives you a feeling of hard effort — of an arduous journey. You cannot relax if +you are thinking in terms of "must." + +Language is a problem. There are certain things which language always expresses +wrongly. For example, relaxation: if I say to relax, then too it becomes an effort and you +will ask, "How to relax?" With "how" you miss the point. You cannot ask "How?" Then +you are asking for a technique, and technique will create effort, effort will create tension. +So if you ask me how to relax, I will say do not do anything: just relax. Just lie down and +wait, do not do anything! All that you can do will be the barrier; it will create the +hindrance. + +If you start counting from one to a hundred and back from a hundred to one, you will +remain awake the whole night. And if sometimes you have fallen asleep because of +counting, it is not because of counting. It is because you counted and counted, and then +you became bored — because of that boredom. It is not because of counting — only +because of boredom. And then you forgot counting and then sleep came. But sleep +comes, relaxation comes, only when you are not doing anything: this is the problem. + + +When I say "sex act" it looks like you need an effort. You do not! Just start playing with +your beloved or your lover; just go on playing. Feel each other, be sensitive to each other, +just like small children playing or just like dogs playing — animals playing. Just go on +playing, and do not think about the sex act at all. It may happen, it may not happen. + +If it happens through just playing, it will lead you to the valley more easily. If you think +about it, then you are already ahead of yourself: you are playing with your beloved, but +you are THINKING of the sex act. Then the playing is false. You are not here and the +mind is in the future, and this mind will always move in the future. + +When you are in the sex act, the mind is thinking about how to finish it. It is always +ahead of you. Do not allow it! Just play, and forget about any sex act. It will happen. + +Then allow it to happen. Then it will be easy to relax, and when it happens just relax. Be +together. Be in each other's presence and feel happy. + +Negatively, something can be done. For example, when you get excited you breathe fast +because excitement needs fast breathing. For relaxation it is good, helpful, if you breathe +deeply — not fast, but slow, breathing very easily — being at ease. Then the sex act can be +prolonged. + +Don't talk, don't say anything, because that creates disturbance. + + + +Don't use mind, use bodies. Use mind only to feel what is happening. Don’t think, just +feel what is happening — the warmth that is flowing, the love that is flowing, the energy +that is encountered. Just feel it. + +Be aware, and that too should not be made a strain. Float effortlessly. Then only will the +valley appear, and once the valley appears YOU are transcended. + +Once you feel and realize the valley, the relaxed orgasm, it is already a transcendence. +Then sex is not there. It has become a meditation — a SAMADHI. + +THE END. + + + +Chapter 35: Turning inward toward the real + + +OH LOTUS-EYED ONE, SWEET OF TOUCH, WHEN SINGING, SEEING, + +TASTING, BE AWARE YOU ARE AND DISCOVER THE EVER-LIVING. +WHEREVER SATISFACTION IS FOUND, IN WHATEVER ACT, ACTUALIZE +THIS. + +AT THE POINT OF SLEEP, WHEN THE SLEEP HAS NOT YET COME AND THE +EXTERNAL WAKEFULNESS VANISHES, AT THIS POINT BEING IS REVEALED. +ILLUSIONS DECEIVE, COLORS CIRCUMSCRIBE, EVEN DIVISIBLES ARE +INDIVISIBLE. + +Civilization is a training in how to become unreal. Tantra is the reverse process — how to +prevent yourself from becoming unreal, and if you have already become unreal, how to +touch the reality which is hidden within you, how to contact it again, how to be again +real. The first thing to be understood is how we go on becoming unreal, and once this +process is understood many things change immediately. The very understanding becomes +mutation. + +Man is bom undivided. He is neither a body nor a mind. He is born undivided, as one +individual. He is both body and mind. Even to say that he is both is wrong. He is body- +mind. Body and mind are two aspects of his being, not two divisions — two polarities of +something which we may call life, energy or anything — X,Y,Z — but body and mind are +not two things. + +The very process of civilization, education, culture, conditioning, starts with the division. +Everyone is taught that he is two, not one, and then, of course, one begins to be identified +with the mind and not with the body. + +The very thinking process becomes your center and the thinking process is just a +periphery. It is not the center because you can exist without thinking. Once you existed +without thinking: thinking is not a necessity to exist. If you go deep in meditation YOU +will be, and there will be no thinking. If you become unconscious YOU will be, but there +will be no thinking. Moving into deep sleep YOU will be, but there will be no thinking. +Thinking is just on the periphery; your being is somewhere else — deeper than thinking. +But you are being taught continuously that you are two, body and mind, and that, really, +you are the mind and you possess the body. The mind becomes the master and body +becomes the slave, and you go on struggling against the body. This creates a rift, a gap, +and that gap is the problem. All neurosis is born out of that gap; all anxiety is bom out of +that gap. + +Your being is rooted in your body, and your body is not just something separate from +existence. It is part of it. Your body is the whole universe. It is not something limited, +finite. You may not have observed it, but try to observe where your body really ends — +where! Do you think that your body ends where your skin ends? + +If the sun which is so far away just goes dead, instantly you will be dead here. If the sun +rays stop coming, you will be no more here. Your body cannot exist without the sun +being there so far away. + +The sun and you are somehow deeply related. The sun must be included in your body; +otherwise you cannot exist. You are part of its rays. + + + +In the morning you see flowers open: their opening is really the rising of the sun. In the +night they will close: their closing is the setting of the sun. They are just rays that are +spread out. You exist here because there, so far away, the sun exists. Your skin is not +really your skin. Your skin goes on spreading; even the sun is included. You are +breathing: you can breathe because the air is there, the atmosphere is there. Each moment +you exhale and inhale the atmosphere in and out. + +If for a single moment there were no air, you would be dead. Your breath is your life. If +your breath is your life, then the whole atmosphere is part of you. You cannot exist +without it. So where does your body really end? Where is the limit? There is no limit! If +you observe, if you go deep, you will find there is no limit. Or, the limit of the universe is +your body limit. The whole universe is involved in you, so your body is not just your +body; it is your universe and you are grounded in it. Your mind too cannot exist without +the body. It is part of it, a process of it. + +Division is destructive, and with the division you are bound to become identified with the +mind. You think, and without thinking there is no division. You think, and you become +identified with your thinking. + +Then you feel as if you possess the body. This is a complete reversal of the truth. You do +not possess the body; neither is the body possessing you. They are not two things. Your +existence is one, a deep hannony of opposite poles. But opposite poles are not divided, +they are joined together. Only then can they become opposite poles. And the opposition +is good. It gives challenge, it gives stamina, it creates energy. It is dialectical. + +If you were really one, without opposite poles within, you would be dull and dead. These +two opposite poles, body and mind, give you life. They are opposite and at the same time +complementary — and basically and ultimately one. One current of energy runs in both. +But once we get identified with the thinking process, we think that we are centered in the +head. If your legs are cut, you will not feel that YOU are cut. You will say, "My legs are +cut." But if your head is cut, YOU are cut. You are murdered. + +If you close your eyes to feel where you are, immediately you will feel you are in your +head. You are not there — because when for the first moment you entered life in your +mother's womb, when the male and female atoms met, there was no head. But life was +started. You were there, and there was no head. In that first meeting of two alive cells, +you were created. The head came later on, but your being was there. Where is that being? +It is not in your head. + +Really, it is nowhere — or everywhere in your body. It is nowhere; you cannot pinpoint +where it is. And the moment you pinpoint it you miss the whole thing. It is everywhere. +Your life is everywhere, it is spread out all over you. And not only all over you; if you +follow it, you will have to go to the very ends of the universe. It is everywhere! + +With the identification that "I am my mind," everything becomes false. You become +unreal because this identity is false. This has to be broken. Tantra techniques are to break +down this identity. The effort of tantra is to make you headless, uncentered, everywhere +or nowhere. And why does humanity, why do human beings become false and unreal +with the mind? Because mind is an epiphenomenon — a process which is necessary, +useful, but secondary; a process which consists of words, not of realities. The word +Tove’ is not love, the word 'god' is not God. But mind consists of words, of a verbal +process, and then love itself becomes less significant than the word Tove'. For the mind, +the word is more significant. God becomes less significant than the word 'God'. For the + + + +mind it is so. Words become more meaningful, significant. They become primary, and we +start living in words. And the more you live in words the more shallow you become, and +you will go on missing the reality which is not words. Reality is existence. + +Living in the mind is as if someone is living in a mirror. + +In the night, if you go to a lake and the lake is silent and there are no ripples, the lake +becomes a mirror. You can look at the moon in the lake, but that moon is false — just a +reflection. The reflection comes from the real, but the reflection is not real. Mind is just a +reflecting phenomenon. The reality is reflected in it, but reflections are not real. And if +you get caught in reflections, you will miss reality completely. That is why, with the +mind, with mind reflections, everything wavers. A slight wave, a slight wind, will disturb +your mind. Reality is not disturbed, but the mind is disturbed by anything. Mind is a +reflecting phenomenon, and we are living in mind. + +Tantra says come down. Descend from your thrones, come down from your heads. Forget +the reflections and move towards the reality. All the techniques which we are discussing +are concerned with this: how to be away from the mind so that you can move into reality. +Now we will discuss the techniques. + +The first technique: + +"OH LOTUS-EYED ONE, SWEET OF TOUCH, WHEN SINGING, SEEING, +TASTING, BE AWARE YOU ARE AND DISCOVER THE EVERLIVING." + +We are living, but we are not aware that we are or that we are living. There is no self- +remembering. You are eating or you are taking a bath or you are taking a walk: you are +not aware that you are while walking. Everything is, only you are not. + +The trees, the houses, the traffic, everything is. You are aware of everything around you, +but you are not aware of your own being — that you are. You may be aware of the whole +world, but if you are not aware of yourself that awareness is false. Why? Because your +mind can reflect everything, but your mind cannot reflect you. If you are aware of +yourself, then you have transcended the mind. + +Your self-remembering cannot be reflected in your mind because you are behind the +mind. It can reflect only things which are in front of it. You can just see others, but you +cannot see yourself. Your eyes can see everyone, but your eyes cannot see themselves. If +you want to see yourself you will need a mirror. Only in the mirror can you see yourself, +but then you will have to stand in front of the mirror. If your mind is a mirror, it can +reflect the whole world. It cannot reflect you because you cannot stand before it. You are +always behind, hidden behind the mirror. + +This technique says while doing anything — singing, seeing, tasting — be aware that you +are and discover the ever-living, and discover within yourself the current, the energy, the +life, the ever-living. But we are not aware of ourselves. + +Gurdjieff used self-remembering as a basic technique in the West. The self-remembering +is derived from this sutra. The whole Gurdjieffian system is based on this one sutra. + +Remember yourself, whatsoever you are doing. It is very difficult. It looks very easy, but +you will go on forgetting. Even for three or four seconds you cannot remember yourself. +You will have a feeling that you are remembering, and suddenly you will have moved to +some other thought. Even with this thought that "Okay, I am remembering myself," you +will have missed, because this thought is not self-remembering. In self-remembering + + + +there will be no thought; you will be completely empty. And self-remembering is not a +mental process. It is not that you say, "Yes, I am." Saying "Yes, I am," you have missed. +This is a mind thing, this is a mental process: "I am." + +Feel "I am," not the words "I am." Don’t verbalize, just feel that you are. Don’t think, +FEEL! Try it. It is difficult, but if you go on insisting it happens. While walking, +remember you are, and have the feeling of your being, not of any thought, not of any +idea. Just feel. I touch your hand or I put my hand on your head: don’t verbalize. Just feel +the touch, and in that feeling feel not only the touch, but feel also the touched one. Then +your consciousness becomes double-arrowed. + +You are walking under trees: the trees are there, the breeze is there, the sun is rising. This +is the world all around you; you are aware of it. Stand for a moment and suddenly +remember that you are, but don’t verbalize. Just feel that you are. + +This nonverbal feeling, even if for only a single moment, will give you a glimpse — a +glimpse which no LSD can give you, a glimpse which is of the real. For a single moment +you are thrown back to the center of your being. You are behind the mirror; you have +transcended the world of reflections; you are existential. And you can do it at any time. It +doesn't need any special place or any special time. And you cannot say, "I have no time." +When eating you can do it, when taking a bath you can do it, when moving or sitting you +can do it — anytime. No matter what you are doing, you can suddenly remember yourself, +and then try to continue that glimpse of your being. + +It will be difficult. One moment you will feel it is there, the next moment you will have +moved away. Some thought will have entered, some reflection will have come to you, +and you will have become involved in the reflection. But don’t be sad and don't be +disappointed. This is so because for lives together we have been concerned with the +reflections. This has become a robot-like mechanism. Instantly, automatically, we are +thrown to the reflection. But if even for a single moment you have the glimpse, it is +enough for the beginning. And why is it enough? Because you will never get two +moments together. Only one moment is with you always. And if you can have the +glimpse for a single moment, you can remain in it. Only effort is needed — a continuous +effort is needed. + + +A single moment is given to you. You cannot have two moments together, so don’t worry +about two moments. You will always get only one moment. And if you can be aware in +one moment, you can be aware for your whole life. Now only effort is needed, and this +can be done the whole day. Whenever you remember, remember yourself. + +"OH LOTUS-EYED ONE, SWEET OF TOUCH, WHEN SINGING, SEEING, +TASTING, BE AWARE YOU ARE, AND DISCOVER THE EVER-LIVING:" When +the sutra says "Be aware you are", what will you do? Will you remember that, "My name +is Ram" or "Jesus" or something else? Will you remember that you belong to such and +such a family, to such and such a religion and tradition? To such and such a country and +caste and creed? Will you remember that you are a communist or a Hindu or a Christian? +What will you remember? + +The sutra says be aware you are; it simply says "You are". No name is needed, no +country is needed. Let there be simple existence: you are! So don't say to yourself who +you are. Don't answer that, "I am this and that." Let there be simple existence, that you +are. + + + +But it becomes difficult because we never remember simple existence. We always +remember something which is just a label, not existence itself. Whenever you think about +yourself, you think about your name, religion, country, many things, but never the simple +existence that you are. + +You can practice this: relaxing in a chair or just sitting under a tree, forget everything and +feel this "you-areness." + +No Christian, no Hindu, no Buddhist, no Indian, no Englishman, no German — simply, +you are. Have the feeling of it, and then it will be easy for you to remember what this +sutra says: "BE AWARE YOU ARE, AND DISCOVER THE EVER-LIVING." And the +moment you are aware that you are, you are thrown into the current of the ever-living. + +The false is going to die; only the real will remain. + +That is why we are so much afraid of death: because the unreal is going to die. The unreal +cannot be forever, and we are attached to the unreal, identified with the unreal. You as a +Hindu will have to die; you as Ram or Krishna will have to die; you as a communist, as +an atheist, as a theist, will have to die; you as a name and form will have to die. And if +you are attached to name and fonn, obviously the fear of death will come to you, but the +real, the existential, the basic in you, is deathless. Once the fonns and names are +forgotten, once you have a look within to the nameless and the formless, you have moved +into the eternal. + +"BE AWARE YOU ARE AND DISCOVER THE EVER-LIVING": This technique is +one of the most helpful, and it has been used for millennia by many teachers, masters. +Buddha used it, Mahavira used it, Jesus used it, and in modern times Gurdjieff used it. +Among all the techniques, this is one of the most potential. Try it. It will take time; +months will pass. + +When Ouspensky was learning with Gurdjieff, for three months he had to make much +effort, arduous effort, in order to have a glimpse of what self-remembering is. + +So continuously, for three months, Ouspensky lived in a secluded house just doing only +one thing — self-remembering. Thirty persons started that experiment, and by the end of +the first week twenty-seven had escaped; only three remained. The whole day they were +trying to remember — not doing anything else, just remembering that "I am." Twenty- +seven felt they were going crazy. They felt that now madness was just near, so they +escaped. They never turned back; they never met Gurdjieff again. + +Why? As we are, really, we are mad. Not remembering who we are, what we are, we are +mad, but this madness is taken as sanity. Once you try to go back, once you try to contact +the real, it will look like craziness, it will look like madness. Compared to what we are, it +is just the reverse, the opposite. If you feel that this is sanity, that will look like madness. +But three persisted. One of the three was P. D. Ouspensky. For three months they +persisted. Only after the first month did they start having glimpses of simply being — of +"I am." After the second month, even the "I" dropped, and they started having the +glimpses of "am-ness" — of just being, not even of "I", because "I" is also a label. The +pure being is not "I" and "thou"; it just is. + +And by the third month even the feeling of "am-ness" dissolved because that feeling of +am-ness is still a word. Even that word dissolves. + +Then you are, and then you know what you are. Before that point comes you cannot ask, +"Who am I?" Or you can go on asking continuously, "Who am I?", just continuously + + + +inquiring, "Who am I ? Who am I?", and all the answers that will be provided by the +mind will be found false, irrelevant. You go on asking, "Who am I? Who am I? Who am +I?" and a point comes where you can no more ask the question. All the answers fall +down, and then the question itself falls down and disappears. And when even the +question, "Who am I?" disappears, you know who you are. + +Gurdjieff tried from one corner: just try to remember you are. Raman Maharshi tried +from another corner. He made it a meditation to ask, to inquire, "Who am I?" And don’t +believe in any answers that the mind can supply. The mind will say, "What nonsense are +you asking? You are this, you are that, you are a man, you are a woman, you are educated +or uneducated, rich or poor." The mind will supply answers, but go on asking. Don’t +accept any answer because all the answers given by the mind are false. They are from the +unreal part of you. They are coming from words, they are coming from scriptures, they +are coming from conditioning, they are coming from society, they are coming from +others. Go on asking. Let this arrow of "Who am I?" penetrate deeper and deeper. A +moment will come when no answer will come. + +That is the right moment. + +Now you are nearing the answer. When no answer comes, you are near the answer +because mind is becoming silent — or you have gone far away from the mind. When there +will be no answer and a vacuum will be created all around you, your questioning will +look absurd. Whom are you questioning? There is no one to answer you. Suddenly, even +your questioning will stop. With the questioning, the last part of the mind has dissolved +because this question was also of the mind. Those answers were of the mind and this +question was also of the mind. Both have dissolved, so now YOU ARE. + +Try this. There is every possibility, if you persist, that this technique can give you a +glimpse of the real — and the real is ever-living. + +The second technique: + +"WHEREVER SATISFACTION IS FOUND, IN WHATEVER ACT, ACTUALIZE +THIS." + +You feel thirsty, so you drink water. A subtle satisfaction is attained. Forget the water, +forget the thirst. Remain with the subtle satisfaction that you are feeling. Be filled with it; +simply feel satisfied. + +But the human mind is mischievous. It only feels dissatisfactions, discontent. It never +feels satisfaction; it never feels content. If you are dissatisfied, you will feel it and you +will be filled by it. When you are thirsty, you feel it: you are filled with thirst; you feel it +in the throat. If it grows you feel it all over your body, and a moment will come when it is +not that YOU are thirsty, you will feel that you have become the thirst. + +If you are in a desert and there is no hope of getting water, you will not feel that YOU are +thirsty; you will feel that you have become the thirst. + +Dissatisfactions are felt, miseries are felt, pains are felt. Whenever you suffer, you +become the suffering. That is why the whole life becomes a hell. You have never felt the +positive; you have always felt the negative. Life is not such a misery as we have made it; +misery is just our interpretation. A Buddha is happy here and now, in this very life. A +Krishna is dancing and playing on a flute. In this very life here and now, where we are in +misery, Krishna is dancing. Life is neither misery, nor is life bliss. Bliss and misery are +our interpretations, our attitudes, our approaches, how we look at it. It is your mind — + + + +how it tokcs it + +Remember, and analyze your own life. Have you ever taken account of happy moments, +of contents, of satisfactions, of blissful glimpses? You have not taken any account, but +you have taken every account of your pain, suffering, misery, and you go on +accumulating. You are an accumulated hell, and this is your own choice. No one else is +forcing you into this hell; this is your own choice. The mind takes the negative, +accumulates it and becomes negative itself. And then this is a self-perpetuating misery. +The more negatives you have within the mind, the more negative you become, the more +negatives are accumulated. + +The similar attracts the similar, and this has been for lives and lives. You miss everything +because of your negative approach. + +This technique gives you a positive approach, a total reversal to the ordinary mind and its +process. Wherever satisfaction is found, in whatever act, actualize this, feel it, become +one with it. Don’t take it just as a passing phase. The satisfaction can become a glimpse +of a greater positive existence. + +Everything is just a window. If you become identified with a pain, you are looking from a +window, and the window of pain, of suffering, opens only towards hell. If you are one +with a satisfactory moment, a blissful moment, an ecstatic moment, you are opening +another window. The existence is the same, but your windows are different. + +Wherever satisfaction is found, in whatsoever act, actualize it — wherever! No +conditions: wherever! You see a friend and you feel happy; you meet your lover or +beloved and you feel happy: actualize this. Be happiness in that moment, and make that +happiness a door. Then you are changing the mind, and you will start accumulating +happiness. Your mind will turn positive, and the same world will look different. + +One Zen monk, Bokuju, is reported to have said, "The world is the same, but nothing is +the same because the mind changes. Everything remains the same, but nothing is the +same because I am not the same." + + +You go on trying to change the world, and no matter what you do the world will remain +the same because you remain the same. You can get a bigger house, you can get a bigger +car, you can get a more beautiful wife or a husband, but nothing will change. The bigger +house will not be bigger. The beautiful wife or husband will not be more beautiful. The +bigger car will remain the smaller one because you are the same. Your mind, your +approach, your ways of seeing are the same. You go on changing things without +changing yourself. So only a miserable person leaves a hut and moves to a palace, but the +miserable person remains the same. He was miserable in a hut; now he will be miserable +in a palace. This misery may be palatial, but he will be miserable. + +You go on carrying your misery with you, and wherever you move you will be with +yourself. So no outer change is basically a change; it is just an appearance. You simply +feel that there has been a change, but there is no change. Only one change, only one +revolution, only one mutation can be there, and that is if your mind changes from +negative to the positive. If your outlook is focused on misery, you live in hell; if your +outlook is focused on happiness, the very hell becomes the heaven. Try this! This will +change your very quality of life. + +But you are interested in quantity. You are interested in how to get more rich — in +quantity, not in quality. + + + +You can have two houses and two cars, a bigger ha nk account, many things. Quantity +changes: it becomes more and more. But your quality remains the same, and richness is +not of things. Richness is of the quality of your mind, of your life. Even a poor man can +be a rich man as far as quality is concerned, and even a rich man can be a poor man. +Almost always this is the case, because a person concerned with things and quantity is +totally unaware that a different dimension is there within him — the dimension of quality. +And that dimension changes only when your mind is positive. + +From tomorrow morning, for the whole day, remember this: whenever you feel +something beautiful, satisfactory, something blissful — and there are many moments in a +twenty-four-hour day — be aware of it. There are many moments when heaven is just +near you, but you are so attached and involved with the hell that you go on missing it. + +The sun rises, the flowers open, the birds sing and the breeze blows through the trees. It +is happening! A small child looks at you with innocent eyes, and a subtle feeling of bliss +enters into you.; or someone smiles and you feel blissful. + +Look all around, and try to find the blissful; be filled with it. In that moment forget +everything. Be filled with it, taste it, and allow it to happen to your whole being. Be one +with it. The fragrance of it will follow you. + +It will go on resounding within you the whole day, and the resounding, the echoing +feeling, will help you to be more positive. + +This is accumulative. If you start in the morning, in the evening you will be more open to +the stars, to the moon, to the night, to the darkness. Do it for twenty-four hours +experimentally, just to have a feeling of what it is. Once you can feel that the positive +leads you to a different world because you become different, you are not going to leave +it. The whole emphasis will have changed from negative to positive. Then you look at the +world in a different, a new way. + +I am reminded of one anecdote. One of Buddha's disciples was taking leave from his +master. The disciple's name was Purnakashyapa. He asked Buddha, "Where am I to go? +Where am I to go to preach your message?" + +Buddha said, "You yourself can choose where " + +So he said, "I will go to a far comer of Bihar" — It was known as Sukha — "I will move to +Sukha province." + +Buddha said, "It is better if you change your choice because the people of that province +are very cruel, violent, mischievous, and no one has yet dared to go there to teach them +non-violence, love, compassion. So please change your choice." + +But Purnakashyapa said, "Allow me to go there BECAUSE no one has gone there, and +someone has to be there." + +Buddha said, "Then I will ask you three questions before I allow you to go. + +If the people of that province insult you, humiliate you, how will you feel it?" +Purnakashyapa said, "I will feel they are very good if they simply insult me. Then they +are not beating me. They are good people; they could have beaten me." + +Buddha said, "Then the second question: if they start beating you, how will you feel?" +Purnakashyapa said, "I will feel they are very good people. They could have killed me, +but they are simply beating me." + +Then Buddha said, "Now the third question: if they really kill you and murder you, then +at the moment when you are dying how will you feel?" + +Purnakashyapa said, "I will thank you and them. If they kill me, they will have freed me + + + +of a life where many errors were possible. They will have freed me so I will feel +thankful." + +So Buddha said, "Now you can go anywhere. The whole world is heaven for you. Now +there is no problem. The world is a heaven, so you can go anywhere." + +With this mind, nothing is wrong with the world. With your mind, nothing can be right. +With a negative mind, everything is wrong — not that it is wrong; it is wrong because a +negative mind can see only what is wrong. + +"WHEREVER THE SATISFACTION IS FOUND, IN WHATEVER ACT, + +ACTUALIZE THIS:" This is a very delicate process, but very sweet also, and the more +you proceed in it, the sweeter it becomes. You will be fdled with a new sweetness and +fragrance. + +Just look for the beautiful; forget the ugly. Then a moment comes when the ugly also +becomes the beautiful. Just look to the happy moment, and a moment comes when there +is nothing which you can call unhappy. There is no unhappy moment then. Be concerned +with the blissful, and sooner or later there will be no misery. Everything is beautified by a +positive mind. + +The third technique: + +"AT THE POINT OF SLEEP, WHEN THE SLEEP HAS NOT YET COME AND +EXTERNAL WAKEFULNESS VANISHES, AT THIS POINT BEING IS +REVEALED." + +There are some turning points in your consciousness. At these turning points you are +nearer to your center than at other times. You change gears, and whenever you change a +gear you pass through the neutral gear. That neutral gear is nearer. In the morning, when +sleep is going, vanishing, and you are feeling awake but not yet awake, just at the +midpoint, you are in a neutral gear. There is a point when you are not asleep and not +awake, just in the middle. There you are in a neutral gear. From sleep to waking, your +consciousness changes the whole mechanism. It jumps from one mechanism to another. +Between the two mechanisms, there is no mechanism; there is a gap. Through that gap +you can have a glimpse of your being. The same happens in the night when you are again +jumping from your waking mechanism to your sleeping mechanism, from your +consciousness to the unconscious. + +For a single moment there is no mechanism, no grip of the mechanism on you, because +you have to take a jump from one to another. Between the two if you can be awake, +between the two if you can become aware, between the two if you can remember +yourself, you will have a glimpse of your real being. + +How to do it? While going to sleep, relax. Close your eyes, make the room dark. Just +close your eyes and start waiting. The sleep is coming; just wait, don't do anything, just +wait! Your body is relaxing, the body is becoming heavy: feel it. Have the feeling of it. +Sleep has its own mechanism, it starts working. Your waking consciousness is vanishing. +Remember, because the moment will be very subtle and the moment will be atomic. If +you miss, you miss. It is not a very long period — a single moment, a very small gap, and +you will change from waking to sleep. Just wait, fully aware. Go on waiting. This will +take time. It takes at least three months. Only then can you have the glimpse one day of +the moment which is just in the middle. So don’t be in a hurry. You cannot do it just now; +you cannot do it tonight. But you have to start and you may have to wait for months. + + + +Ordinarily, within three months, one day it happens. It is happening every day, but your +awareness and the meeting of the gap cannot be planned. It is a happening. You just go +on waiting, and someday it happens. + +Someday, suddenly you become aware that you are neither awake nor asleep — a very +weird phenomenon. You may even become afraid because you have known only the two: +you know when you are asleep, you know when you are awake. But you don’t know a +third point in your being when you are neither. At the first impact of it you may become +afraid and scared. Don’t get scared and don’t be afraid. Anything which is so new, +unknown previously, is bound to give a certain fear because this moment, when you will +have experienced it again and again, will give you another feeling also: that you are +neither alive nor dead, neither this nor that. This is an abyss. + +These two mechanisms are like two hills; you jump from one peak to another. If you +remain in the middle you fall into an abyss, and the abyss is bottomless: you go on +falling, you go on falling. Sufis have used this technique, and before they give this +technique to a seeker, they give another practice also just to safeguard. Whenever this +technique is given in Sufi systems, before it another practice is given, and that is to +imagine with closed eyes that you are falling into a deep well — dark, deep and +bottomless. Just imagine falling into a deep well — falling and falling and falling, +eternally falling. There is no bottom, you cannot reach to the bottom. Now this fall +cannot stop anywhere. You can stop; you can open your eyes and say no more, but this +fall in itself cannot stop. + +If you continue, the well is bottomless, and it gets more and more dark. + +In Sufi systems, this well exercise — this bottomless, dark well exercise — is to be +practiced first. It is good, helpful. If you have practiced it and you have realized the +beauty of it, the silence, then the deeper you go into the well, the more silent you +become. The world is left far away, and you feel that you have gone far away, far away, +far away. Silence grows with darkness, and deep down there is no bottom. Fear comes to +your mind, but you know that this is just imagination so you can continue. + +Through this exercise, you become capable of this technique, and then, when you fall into +the well between waking and sleeping, it is not imagination; it is a real fact. And it is +bottomless, the abyss is bottomless. That is why Buddha has called this nothingness +emptiness — SHUNYA. There is no end to it. Once you know it, you also have become +endless. It is difficult to have this glimpse while awake. Then it is impossible, of course, +while you are asleep because then the mechanism is functioning, and it is difficult to +detach yourself from the mechanism. But there is a moment in the night and in the +morning another moment — in twenty-four hours there are these two moments — when it +is very easy, but one has to wait. + +”AT THE POINT OF SLEEP, WHEN SLEEP HAS NOT YET COME AND +EXTERNAL WAKEFULNESS VANISHES, AT THIS POINT BEING IS +REVEALED:" Then you know who you are, what is your real being, what is your +authentic existence. + +We are false while we are awake, and you know it well. You are false while you are +awake. You smile when tears would have been more real. Your tears are also not +believable. They may be just a facade, ceremonial, a duty. Your smile is false, and those +who study faces can say that your smile is just a painted smile. There are no roots within; + + + +the smile is just on your face, just on your lips. It is nowhere else in your being. There are +no roots, there are no limbs. It is imposed. The smile is not coming from within to +without; the smile has been forced from without. + +Whatsoever you say and whatsoever you act is false, and it is not necessarily the case that +you are doing this false business of life knowingly — not necessarily! You may be totally +unaware — and you are! Otherwise it will be very difficult to carry such false nonsense +continuously. It is automatic. This falseness continues while you are awake, and it +continues even while you are asleep — in a different way, of course. Your dreams are +symbolic, not real. It is surprising that even in your dreams you are not real, even in your +dreams you are afraid, and you create symbols. + +Now psychoanalysis goes on doing this business of analyzing your dreams. They have a +big business because you cannot analyze your own dreams. They are symbolic, they are +not real. They say something only in metaphors. If you want to kill your mother and get +rid of her, you are not going to kill her even in your dream. + +You will kill someone else who looks like your mother. You will kill your aunt or +someone else, but not your mother. Even in dreams you cannot be real. Then +psychoanalysis is needed; a professional is needed to interpret — but you may describe +the whole thing in such a way that even psychoanalysis is deceived. + +Your dreams are also totally false. If you are real while you are awake, your dreams will +be real. They will not be symbolic. If you want to kill your mother you will see a dream +in which you kill your mother, and no interpreter will be needed to show you what your +dream means. But we are so false. In dream you are alone, still afraid of the world and +the society. + +To kill a mother is the greatest sin, and I wonder whether you have ever thought about +why to kill a mother is the greatest sin. It is the greatest sin because everyone feels a deep +enmity toward his mother. It is the greatest sin, and it is taught, your mind is conditioned, +that even to think of hanning your mother is a sin. She has given birth to you. All over +the world, in all societies, the same is taught. There is not a single society on the earth +which will not agree to this, that to kill a mother is the greatest sin. She has given you +birth and you are killing her? + +But why this teaching? Deep down there is the possibility that everyone goes against his +mother of necessity — because the mother has not only given birth to you, she has been +the instrument of falsifying you; she has been the instrument of forcing you to be unreal. + +She has made you whatsoever you are. If you are a hell, she has a part in it, the greatest +part. If you are miserable, your mother is there somewhere, hidden in you because the +mother has given you birth, she has brought you up — or, really, she has brought you +"down" from your reality. She has falsified you. The first untruth happened between you +and your mother; the first lie happened between you and your mother — the first lie! + +Even when there is no language and the child cannot speak, he can lie. The child sooner +or later becomes aware that many of his feelings are not approved by his mother. Her +face, her eyes, her behavior, her mood, everything shows that something in him is not +accepted, appreciated. Then he starts suppressing. Something is wrong. There is no +language yet; his mind is not functioning. But his whole body starts suppressing. Then be +begins to feel that sometimes something is appreciated by the mother. He depends on the +mother, his life depends on the mother. If the mother leaves him, he will be no more. His +whole existence is centered on the mother. + + + +Everything the mother shows, does, speaks, behaves, is significant. If the child smiles, +and the mother loves him and gives him warmth and milk and hugs him, he is learning +politics. He will smile while there is no smile in him because now he knows he can +persuade the mother. He will smile a false smile. + +Then the liar is born; the politician has come into existence. Now he knows how to +falsify, and this he leams in his relationship with his mother. This is the first relationship +with the world. When he will become aware of his misery, of his hell, of his confusions, +he will find that his mother is hidden somewhere. + +There is every possibility that you may feel inimical towards your mother. That is why +every culture insists that it is the greatest sin to kill your mother. Even in thought, even in +dream, you cannot kill your mother. I am not saying that you SHOULD kill her, I am +simply saying that your dreams are also false — symbolic, not real. You are so false that +you cannot even dream a real dream. + +These are our two false faces: one is there while you are awake, one is there while you +are asleep. Between these two false faces there is a very small door, an interval. In that +interval you can have a glimpse of your original face when you were not related to your +mother, and through the mother to the society; when you were alone with yourself; when +YOU WERE — not this and that, there was no division. Only the real was; there was no +unreal. You can have a glimpse of that face, that innocent face between these two +mechanisms. + +Ordinarily we are not concerned with dreams, we are concerned with our waking hours. +But psychoanalysis is more concerned with your dreams, not with your waking hours, +because it feels that in waking hours you are a greater liar. + +In dreams something can be caught. You are less aware when you are asleep, and you are +not forcing things, you are not manipulating. Then something real can be caught. You +may be a celibate, a monk in your waking hours, but you have suppressed the sex urge. +Then it will force itself into your dreams; your dreams are going to be sexual. It is very +difficult to find a monk who is without sexual dreams — rather, impossible. You can find +a criminal without sexual dreams, but you cannot find a religious man without sexual +dreams. A debauchee may be without sexual dreams, but not so-called saints, because +whatsoever you force down while you are awake will erupt in your dreams and will color +your dreams. + +Psychoanalysts are not concerned with your waking life because they know it is totally +false. If something of the real can be glimpsed, it can be glimpsed only through your +dreams. But tantra says that even dreams are not so real. They are more real — and this +will look paradoxical because we think that dreams are unreal — they are more real than +your waking hours because then you are less on guard. The censor is asleep, and things +can come up, and the suppressed can express itself — of course symbolically, but symbols +can be analyzed. + +And all over the world human symbols are the same. You may speak a different language +while awake, but while dreaming you speak the same language. + +All over the world the dream language is one. If sex is repressed, then the same symbols +will come up. If the urge for food, the urge to eat, hunger, is repressed, then the same +symbols will come — or similar ones. The dream language is one, but in dreams there are +still problems because they are symbolic. And a Freud may interpret them in a different + + + +way, a Jung in a different way and an Adler still in a different way. And if you are +analyzed by a hundred psychoanalysts, there will be a hundred interpretations. You will +be still more confused than you were before, more confused with a hundred +interpretations of one thing. + +Tantra says in neither waking nor sleeping are you real. You are real only in between. So +don’t be concerned with the waking, and don’t be concerned with dreaming and sleep. Be +concerned with the gap; be aware of the gap. While passing from one state to another +have a glimpse. And once you know when the gap comes, you become the master of it. +You have the key; you can open that gap anytime and enter into it. A different dimension +of being, the real dimension, opens. + +The fourth technique, and the last: + +"ILLUSIONS DECEIVE, COLORS CIRCUMSCRIBE, EVEN DIVISIBLES ARE +INDIVISIBLE." + +This is a rare technique, one not much used, but one of the greatest teachers in India, +Shankara, has used it, and Shankara has based his whole philosophy on this technique. + +You know his philosophy of MAYA — illusion. Shankara says everything is illusory. +Whatsoever you are seeing, hearing, feeling, all is illusion. It is not real because the real +cannot be contacted by senses. You are hearing me and I am seeing you hearing me: it +may be just a dream, and there is no way how to judge whether it is a dream or not. I may +be just dreaming that you are here listening to me. How am I to know that this is real and +not a dream? There is no way. + +Chuang Tzu is reported to have said that one night he dreamt that he had become a +butterfly. In the morning he was very sad — and he was not a man to have sadness, he +was never known to be sad. His disciples gathered and said, "Chuang Tzu, Master, why +are you so sad?" + +Chuang Tzu said, "Because of a dream." + +The disciples laughed and said, "Because of a dream you are sad — you who have been +always teaching us not to be sad even if the whole world causes you sadness? And just a +dream has caused you sadness? What are you talking about?" + +Chuang Tzu said, "It is such a dream that it causes me very, very deep confusion, +sadness, misery. I dreamt in my dream that I had become a butterfly." + +The disciples said, "What is so puzzling in it?" + +Chuang Tzu said, "Now this is the puzzle: if Chuang Tzu can dream that he can become a +butterfly, why not the reverse? The butterfly may dream that it has become a Chuang +Tzu. + +So now I am disturbed. What is right and what is wrong? What is real and what is unreal? +Was it Chuang Tzu who was dreaming of becoming a butterfly or has the butterfly now +gone to sleep and dreamt that it has become a Chuang Tzu? If one is possible, then the +other is possible." And it is said that Chuang Tzu never could get over this puzzle. This +remained for his whole life. + +How to decide that I am not in a dream talking to you? How to decide that you are not +dreaming I am talking? With senses no decision is possible, because while dreaming, +dreams look real — as real as anything. When you dream, you always feel it is real. When +dreams can be felt as real, why can reality not be felt as dream? + +Shankara says with senses there is no possibility to know whether the thing confronting + + + +you is real or unreal. And if there is no possibility to know whether it is real or unreal, +Shankara calls it MAYA: it is illusion. Illusion doesn't mean unreal. Illusion means an +impossibility to decide whether it is real or unreal — remember this. + +In Western languages MAYA has been translated very wrongly, and it gives the feeling +in Western terms that "illusion" means "unreal." It does not! "Illusion" means the +inability to decide whether the thing is real or unreal. This confusion is MAYA. + +This whole world is MAYA, a confusion. You cannot decide; you cannot be decisive +about it. + +It is always escaping you, always changing, turning into something else. It is fantasy, a +dreamlike thing. This technique is concerned with this philosophy. "ILLUSIONS +DECEIVE:" or, that which deceives is illusion - "COLORS CIRCUMSCRIBE, EVEN +DIVISIBLES ARE INDIVISIBLE:" In this world of illusion nothing is certain. This +whole world is like rainbows. They appear to be, but they are not. If you are far away +they are, but if you come nearer they dissolve. The nearer you come, the more they are +not. If you reach to a point where you were seeing a rainbow, it is no more there. + +The whole world is like rainbow colors, and it is so. When you are far away everything is +hopeful; when you come nearer the hope disappears. And when you reach the goal, only +ashes are there — just a dead rainbow. The colors have disappeared, and things as they +appeared are not. As you feel them to be, they are not. + +"EVEN DIVISIBLES ARE INDIVISIBLE:" Your whole mathematics, your whole +calculating system, all your concepts, all your philosophy, just become futile. If you try +to understand this illusion, your very effort confuses you more. Nothing is certain there; +everything is uncertain — a flux, a flux of change, with no possibility for you to decide +whether this or that is true or false. What will happen? If you take this attitude, what will +happen? If you really go deep in this attitude that everything which cannot be decided is +illusory, you will automatically, spontaneously turn to yourself. + +Then the only point where you can have a center is in your own being. That is certain. + +Try to understand this: I may dream in the night that I have become a butterfly, and I +cannot decide in that dream whether this is real or unreal. In the morning I may be +puzzled like Chuang Tzu whether instead the butterfly may have been dreaming. These +are two dreams, and there is no way to compare which is real and which is unreal. + +But Chuang Tzu is missing one thing — the dreamer. He is thinking only of dreams, +comparing dreams and missing the dreamer — the one who dreams that Chuang Tzu has +become a butterfly, the one who is thinking that it may be quite the reverse: that the +butterfly is dreaming that she has become Chuang Tzu. Who is this observer? Who was +asleep and is now awake? You may be unreal, you may be a dream to me, but "I" cannot +be a dream to myself, because even for a dream to exist a real dreamer is needed. Even +for a false dream a real dreamer is needed. Even a dream cannot exist without a real +dreamer. So forget dream. This technique says forget dream. The whole world is illusion, +you are not. So don’t go after the world, there is no possibility to gain certainty there. + +And now this appears to be proven even by scientific research. + +For the last three centuries science was certain, and Shankara looked to be just a +philosophical mind, poetic. For three centuries science was certain, but now, during these +two last decades, science has become uncertain. + + +Now the greatest scientists say nothing is certain, and with matter we will never be + + + +certain. Everything has again become uncertain. Everything looks like a flux, changing. +Only appearance looks certain. The deeper you go, the more everything becomes +uncertain, indefinite. Shankara says, and tantra has always been saying, that the world is +illusory. Even before Shankara was bom, tantra was preaching one technique — that the +whole world is illusory, so think of it as a dream. If you can think of it as a dream — and +if you think at all, you will come to realize it as a dream — then your whole focus of +consciousness will turn inwards, because there is a deep urge to find the truth, the real. + +If the whole world is unreal, then there is no shelter in it. Then you are moving after, +following shadows, and wasting time and life and energy. Then move inward. s One thing +is certain: "I am." Even if the whole world is illusory, one thing is certain: there is +someone who kn ows this is illusory. The knowledge may be illusory, the kn own may be +illusory, but the knower cannot be. This is the only certainty, the only rock on which you +can stand. + +This technique says look at the world: it is a dream, illusory, and nothing is as it appears. +It is just a rainbow. Go deep in this feeling. You will be thrown to yourself. With that +coming to one's own self, you come to a certain truth, to something which is indubitable, +which is absolute. + + +Science can never be absolute. It is going to be relative. Only religion can be absolute +because it searches not the dream, it searches for the dreamer; not for the observed, but +for the observer, the seer, the one who is aware. + +THE END. + + + +Chapter 36: From maya (illusion) to reality + + +The first question: + +Question 1 + +"IN WHICH WAY CAN THE PRACTICE OF SELF-REMEMBERING TRANSFORM +THE HUMAN MIND?" + +Man is not centered in himself. He is bom centered, but the society, the family, the +education, the culture, they push him off-center, and they put him off-center in a very +cunning way, knowingly or unknowingly. So everyone becomes, in a sense, + +"eccentric" — off the center. There are reasons, survival reasons for it. + +When a child is born he has to be forced into a certain discipline. He cannot be allowed +freedom. If he is allowed total freedom, he will remain with the center — spontaneous, +living with himself, living himself. He will be original as he is. He will be authentic, and +then there will be no need to practice any self-remembering. There will be no need to +practice any meditation because he will never go off the center. He will remain with +himself — centered, rooted, grounded in his own being. But this has not yet been possible. +Meditation is, therefore, medicinal. The society creates the disease, and then the disease +has to be treated. + +Religion is medicinal. If really a human society based in freedom can be evolved, there +would be no need of religion. Because we are ill medicine is needed, and because we are +off-center methods of centering are needed. If someday it becomes possible on earth to +create a healthy society, healthy in the inner sense, there will be no religion. + +But it seems difficult to create such a society. + +The child has to be disciplined. What are you doing when you are disciplining a child? +You are forcing something which is not natural to him. You are asking and demanding +something which he will never do spontaneously. You will punish him, you will +appreciate, you will bribe him, you will do everything to make him social — to take him +away from his natural being. You will create a new center in his mind which was never +there, and this center will grow and the natural center will go into oblivion, into the +unconscious. + +Your natural center has moved into the unconscious, into the dark, and your unnatural +center has become your conscious. There is really no division between unconscious and +conscious; the division is created. You are one consciousness. This division comes +because your own center has been forced to some dark corner. Even you are not in +contact with it; you are not allowed to be in contact with it. You yourself have become +unconscious that you have a center. You live what the society, the culture, the family +have taught you to live. + +You live a false life. For this false life a false center is needed. That center is your ego, +your conscious mind. That is why, no matter what you do, you will never be blissful — +because only the real center can happen, only the real center can explode, can come to the +climax, the optimum, of the possibility of bliss. + +The false center is a shadow game. You can play with it, you can hope with it, but +ultimately nothing but frustration comes out of it. With a false anxiety that is bound to be +so. + + + +In a way everything is forcing you not to be yourself, and this cannot be changed just by +saying that this is wrong, because society has its own needs. A child, when born, is just +like an animal — spontaneous, centered, grounded, but so independent. He cannot become +part of an organization. He is disturbing. He has to be forced, cultivated and changed. In +this cultivation he has to be pushed off-center. + +We live on the periphery and we live only to the extent that the society allows us. Our +freedom is false because the rules of the game, of the social game, are so deeply fixed +that you may feel that you are choosing this and that, but you are not choosing. The +choice comes from your cultivated mind, and this goes on in a mechanical way. + +I am reminded of a man who married eight women in his life. He married one woman, +then divorced her, then married another — very cautiously, very carefully, very carefully, +in order not to fall into the old trap again. In every way he calculated, and he was +thinking that this new woman was going to be totally different than the first one. But +within a few days, with the honeymoon not yet even over, the new woman started to +prove herself to be just the same as the old one, the first one. + +Within six months the marriage was shattered again. He married a third woman and now +he was still more cautious, but again the same thing happened. + +He married eight women, and every time the woman turned out to be the same as the old +one. What was happening? And he was choosing very cautiously now, very carefully. +What was happening? The chooser was unconscious. He couldn’t change the chooser, and +the chooser was always the same so the choice was going to be the same. And the +chooser works unconsciously. + +You go on doing this and that, and you go on changing outward things, but you remain +the same. You remain off-center. Whatsoever you do, howsoever it is apparently +different, it ultimately proves to be the same. The results are always the same; the +outcome is always the same; the consequence is always the same. + +Whenever you feel you are choosing and you are free, then too you are not free and you +are not choosing. The choice is also a mechanical thing. Scientists say, biologists +particularly, that the mind becomes imprinted, and that happens very early. The first two +or three years are the years for imprinting, and things become fixed in the mind. Then +you go on doing the same; you go on repeating in a mechanical way. You are moving in a +vicious circle. + +The child is forced to be off-center. He has to be disciplined; he has to learn obedience. + +That is why we give so much value to obedience. And obedience destroys everyone, +because obedience means now you are not the center: the other is the center; you are just +to follow him. + +Education is a necessity in order to survive, but we make this necessity to survive an +excuse for submitting. We force everyone to be obedient. What does it mean? Obedient +to whom? Always someone else — the father, the mother, someone else is there, and you +have to be obedient to him. Why so much insistence for obedience? Because your father +was forced to be obedient when he was a child; your mother was forced to be obedient +when she was a child. They were forced off their centers; now they are doing the same. +They are doing the same with their children, and these children will do the same again. +This is how the vicious circle moves on. + +Freedom is killed, and with freedom you lose your center. Not that the center is +destroyed; it cannot be destroyed while you are alive. It would be good if it was + + + +destroyed; you would be more at ease with yourself. If you were totally false and there +was no real center hidden within you, you would be at ease. There would be no conflict, +no anxiety, no struggle. + +The conflict comes into existence because the real remains there. It remains in the center, +and just on the periphery an unreal center is created. Between these two centers a +constant struggle, a constant anxiety, tension, is created. + +This must be transformed, and there is only one way: the false must disappear and the +real must be given its place. You must be regrounded into your center, into your being; +otherwise you will be in anguish. + +The false can disappear. The real cannot disappear unless you die. While you are alive +the real will be there. The society can do only one thing: it can push it deep down and it +can create a barrier so that even you become unconscious of it. Can you remember any +moment in your life when you were spontaneous, when you just lived in the moment — +when you were living yourself and you were not following someone else? + +I was reading one memoir of a poet. His father had died, and the dead body was put in a +coffin. The poet, the son, was weeping, crying, and then suddenly he kissed the forehead +of his father’s dead body and said, "There, now that you are dead, I can do this. I always +wanted to kiss you on your forehead, but while you were alive it was impossible. I was so +afraid of you." + +You can kiss only a dead father — and even if the alive father allows you to kiss, the kiss +is going to be false; it cannot be spontaneous. A young boy cannot even kiss his mother +spontaneously because always the fear of sex is there; the bodies must not come too +closely in contact, even with the mother. Everything becomes false. There is fear and +falsity — no freedom, no spontaneousness, and the real center can function only when you +are spontaneous and free. + + +Now you will be able to understand what is my attitude towards this question: "IN +WHICH WAY CAN THE PRACTICE OF SELF-REMEMBERING TRANSFORM THE +HUMAN MIND?" It will reground you; it will give you again roots into your own center. +By self-remembering, you are forgetting everything other than yourself: the society, the +mad world around you, the family, the relationships, everything, you are forgetting. You +are simply remembering that you are. + +This remembrance is not given by the society to you. This self-remembrance will detach +you from all that is peripheral. And if you can remember, you will fall back to your own +being, to your own center. The ego will be there just on the periphery, but you will be +able to see it now. Like any other object, you will be able to observe it. And once you +become capable of observing your ego, your false center, you will never be false again. +You may need your false center because you have to live in a society which is false. You +will be able to use it now, but you will never be identified with it. It will be instrumental +now. You will live on your center, in your center. You will be able to use the false as a +social convenience, a convention, but you will not be identified with it. Now you know +you can be spontaneous, free. Self-remembering transforms you because it gives you the +opportunity to be yourself again — and to be oneself is the ultimate and to be oneself is +the absolute. + + + +The peak of all the possibilities, of all the potentialities, is the divine — or whatsoever +you want to call it. God is not somewhere in the past; he is your future. You have heard it +said again and again that God is the father. More significantly, he is going to be your son, +not the father, because he is going to evolve out of you. So I say, "God the son," because +the father is in the past and the son is in the future. + +You can become divine, God can be born out of you; if you are authentically yourself, +you have taken the basic step. You are going towards divinity, towards total freedom. As +a slave you cannot move to that. As a slave, as a false person, there is no path leading +towards the divine, to the ultimate possibility, the ultimate flowering of your being. First +you must be centered in yourself. Self-remembering helps and only self-remembering +helps; nothing else can transform you. With the false center there is no growth — only +accumulation — and remember the distinction between accumulation and growth. With +the false center you can accumulate: you can accumulate wealth, you can accumulate +knowledge, you can accumulate anything, without any growth. Growth happens only to +the real center. Growth is not an accumulation; you are not burdened by growth. +Accumulation is a burden. + +You can know many things without knowing anything. You can know much about love +without knowing love. + +Then it is an accumulation. If you know love, then it is growth. You can kn ow much +about love with the false center; you can love only with the real center. Real centers can +mature. The false can only get bigger and bigger without any growth, without any +maturity. The false is just a cancerous growth, an accumulation, burdening you like a +disease. + +But you can do one thing: you can change your focus totally. From the false, you can +move your eyes to the real. This is what is meant by self-remembering: whatsoever you +are doing, remember yourself — that you are. Don’t forget it. The very remembering will +give an authentic reality to whatsoever you are doing. If you are loving, first remember +that you are; otherwise you will be loving from the false center. And from the false center +you can only pretend; you cannot love. If you are praying, first remember that you are; +otherwise the prayer is going to be just nonsense, just a deception. And you are not +deceiving anyone else; you are deceiving yourself. + +First remember that you are, and this remembering that "I am" must become so basic that +it follows you like a shadow. Then even while asleep it will enter, and you will +remember. If you can remember the whole day, by and by it enters even in your dreams, +even in your sleep, and you will know that "I am." + +The day you can know even in your sleep that you are, you are grounded in your center. + +Now the false is no more; it is not a burden to you. You can use it now, it is instrumental. +You are not a slave to it, you have become the master. + +Krishna says in the Gita that while everyone is asleep, the yogi is not: he is awake. It is +not meant that the yogi lives without sleep, because sleep is a biological, bodily +necessity. What is meant is that he remembers even in his sleep that he is — that "I am." +Sleep is just on the periphery. In the center the remembrance is there. + +The yogi remembers even while he is asleep, and you are not remembering yourself +while you are even awake. You are walking on the street, but you are not remembering +that you are. Try, and you will feel a change of quality. Try to remember that you are. +Suddenly a new lightness comes to you, the heaviness disappears; you become + + + +weightless. You are thrown off the false center to the real one again, but it is difficult and +arduous because we are so much grounded in the false. It will take time, but no +transfonnation is possible without self-remembering becoming effortless for you. You +simply start remembering yourself; otherwise no transformation is possible. + +The second question: + +Question 2 + +"LAST NIGHT YOU SAID THAT ONE SHOULD ALWAYS SEE LIFE IN ITS +POSITIVE DIMENSIONS AND ONE SHOULD NOT GIVE EMPHASIS TO THE +NEGATIVE. IS THIS NOT A CHOICE? AND IS THIS NOT AGAINST +ENCOUNTERING THE TOTAL REALITY - THAT WHICH IS?" + +It is a choice, but one who is negative cannot take a jump towards choicelessness. + +If he can take it, it is good, but it is impossible. From the negative, it is impossible to take +a jump towards choicelessness because the negative mind means that you can see only +the ugly, you can see only death, you can see only misery. You cannot see any positive +elements in life. And, remember, it is difficult to lose misery. + +It may look very strange when I say this, but it is difficult to take a jump from misery; it +is easier to take a jump from happiness. It is easier to take a jump when you are happy +because with happiness courage comes, with happiness the possibility of a higher bliss +opens, with happiness the whole world looks like a home. With misery the world is like a +hell, and there is no hope; everything is just hopeless. Then you cannot take any jump. In +misery one becomes a coward, and one clings to misery because at least this misery is +known. + +You cannot be adventurous when you are unhappy. Adventure needs a subtle happiness +in you. Then you can leave the known. You are so happy that you are not afraid of the +unknown. And the happiness has become such a deep phenomenon to you that you know +that wherever you will be you will be happy. With the positive mind you know there is +no hell, and wherever you are the heaven will be. You can move into the unknown +because now you know that heaven moves with you. + +You have heard that you enter heaven or hell. + +This is nonsense. No one enters heaven, no one enters hell. You carry your own hell and +heaven with you, and wherever you enter, you enter with your hell or heaven. Heaven +and hell are not doors. They are burdens; you carry them with you. + +Only with a dancing heart — happy, blissful, positive — can you take a jump into the +uncharted. That is why I say that from the negative you cannot be choiceless. You cling +to your misery. It is known. You are acquainted with it, you are related to it, and it is +better to remain with the known misery than with the unknown. At least you have +become accustomed to it, and you know its ways. You have created certain defense +mechanisms, an armor around you to be safe from this misery. An unknown misery will +create new defense mechanisms. It is always better to be with the known misery than +with an unknown misery. + +With happiness, quite the reverse is the case. With happiness, one wants to move into the +unknown happiness because the known gets boring. You never get bored with the known +misery; you enjoy it. Look at people talking about their misery: they enjoy it, they +magnify their misery; they have a subtle happiness. + +With happiness you get bored. You can move into the unknown. The unknown is +alluring, and the choiceless is the door for the unknown. This is how one has to move: + + + +from the negative to the positive and from the positive to the choiceless. + + +First make your mind positive. From hell move to heaven, and from heaven you can +move to moksha — to the ultimate which is neither. From misery move to bliss, and only +then you can move to the beyond which is beyond both. That is why the sutra said first to +transfonn your mind from negative to positive, and this change is just a change of +focusing. + +Life is both or neither. It IS both or neither; it depends on you, on how you see it. You +can look at it with a negative mind, and then it looks like hell. It is not hell; this is only +your interpretation. + +You change your outlook: look positively. And this is what is meant by the attitude of the +atheist. I don’t call a man an atheist or theist because he believes in God or not. I call a +man a theist if he has a positive attitude and an atheist if he has a negative attitude. It is +not a question of saying no to God; it is a question of saying no to life. The theist is one +who says yes and looks always from a yea-saying mind. Then everything changes totally. +If a negative mind comes to a rose, to a garden, many roses may be there, but he will +count only the thorns. The first thing for the negative mind is the thorns; that is +significant. Flowers are just illusory; only thorns are real. He will count, and, of course, +for each flower a thousand thorns exist. And once he has counted a thousand thorns he +cannot believe in one flower. + +He will say this one flower is just illusory. How can such a beautiful flower exist with +such ugly thorns, violent thorns? It is impossible, it is unbelievable. And even if it exists, +it means nothing now. One thousand thorns have been counted, and the flower +disappears. + +A positive mind will start with the rose, with the flower. And once you are in a +communion with the rose, once you know the beauty, the life, the unearthly flowering, +thorns disappear. And one who has known the rose in its beauty, in its highest possibility, +one who has looked deep into it, for him now even thorns will not look like thorns. The +eyes filled with the rose are different now. Now the thorns will look just like a protection +for this flower. They will not be enemies; they will look just like part of the happening of +flowers. + +Now this mind will kn ow that this flower happens and these thorns are needed, they +protect. Because of these thorns this flower could happen. This positive mind will feel +grateful even to thorns. And if this approach deepens, a moment comes when thorns +become flowers. With the first approach the flower disappears — or the flower even +becomes a thorn. Only with a positive mind can you get the state of a non-tense mind. +With a negative mind you will remain tense, with so many miseries all around. Such a +negative, inventive mind goes on revealing miseries and miseries and hells and hells. + + +In Buddha’s time, there was one really famous teacher. His name was Sanjaya +Vilethiputta. He was an absolutely negative thinker. Buddha thought of seven hells, so +someone came to Sanjaya Vilethiputta and told him that Buddha said there are seven +hells. Sanjaya Vilethiputta said, "Go and tell your Buddha he doesn't know anything. +There are seven hundred hells. He doesn’t kn ow anything! Only seven? There are seven +hundred hells, and I have counted all of them." + +If you have a negative mind, even seven hundred are not much. You will find more; there + + + +is no end to it. The positive mind can be non-tense. Really, if you are positive how can +you be tense and if you are negative how you can be non-tense? With a negative mind +there can be no association with meditation. The negative mind is anti-meditative; it +cannot meditate. A single mosquito is enough to destroy all meditation. With a negative +mind, the door is closed for tranquility, for stillness, for silence. The negative mind is +self-perpetuating for misery. How can it take a jump toward choicelessness? +Krishnamurti goes on talking about choicelessness, and the audience is negative. They +listen, but they never understand. And when they are not understanding, Krishnamurti +gets disturbed because they are not understanding him. Only a positive mind can +understand what he is saying, but a positive mind need not go anywhere — neither to any +Krishnamurti nor to any Rajneesh, nowhere. + +Only a negative mind is in search of a teacher, of a master. + +To talk to the negative mind about choicelessness, about going beyond duality, about +living both negative and positive, is meaningless. Not that this is untrue — it is true, but +meaningless. The one who is listening must be taken into account. He is more important +than the one who is talking. As I see it, you are negative. First you need a transformation +towards positivity. From your "no-saying" you must become a yea-sayer. You must look +at life with a "yes" attitude, and with a "yes" attitude this very earth is totally +transfonned. Only then, when you have attained a positive attitude, can you take a jump +towards choicelessness — and that will be easy, very easy! + +Misery cannot be renounced. It is difficult; you cling to it. Only happiness can be +renounced because then you know that when you renounce the negative you gain the +positive and a positive happiness. You renounce the negative and you gain happiness: +just by renouncing the negative you attain to happiness. If you now renounce this +happiness, this positive mind also, you open the doors for the infinite. But you must first +have a feel of the positive. Only then, only then, can you take a jump. + +The third question: + +Question 3 + +"IN THE LAST TECHNIQUE YESTERDAY, YOU EXPLAINED THAT IN THIS +WORLD OF MAYA, THE INNER CONSCIOUSNESS OF THE SEEKER IS THE +ONLY REAL CENTER FOR HIM. + +IN THIS REFERENCE, PLEASE EXPLAIN THE SIGNIFICANCE AND ROLE OF +THE GURU IN THIS WORLD OF MAYA." + +This world of MAYA is not a world of MAYA for you; it is very real, and the role of the +guru is to show you that it is not real. It is real for you, so how can you think that it is +unreal? You can think about unreality only if you have a glimpse of the real; only then +can you compare. This world is not MAYA illusory, for you. You have heard, you have +read that this world is MAYA, and you may have memorized it just like a parrot, so you +also call this world illusory. + +Everyday someone comes to me who calls this world illusory and then he says, "My +mind is very much bothered. I am very tense, so tell me how to attain peace?" And this +world is "illusory" ! If this world is illusory, how can your mind be tense? If you have +known that this world is illusory, the world will have disappeared, and with the world all +its misery. But the mind still is. You don’t "know" that this world is illusory. + +In the morning when the sleep has disappeared, and with it the dream, are you worried + + + +about the dream? Are you worried that in the dream you felt ill or that you were even +dead? While the dream was there, you were worried, you were ill, you were asking for a +doctor, for some medicine. But in the morning, the moment you are not asleep and the +dream has disappeared, you are not worried. + +Now you know it was a dream, and you are not ill. + +If someone comes to me and says, "I know that it was a dream that I was ill, but now tell +me something: where am I to get the medicine to get over that illness?" what will it +show? It will show he is still asleep; it will show that he is still dreaming. The dream is +still there. + +In India, this parrot-like speech that "the whole world is illusory" has gone deep into the +mind, but in the false center. It is not a growth. We have heard, the Upanishads, the +Vedas and the RISHIS have been saying for centuries, that the world is illusory. They +have propagated the idea so strongly that those who are asleep and dreaming, they think +they are awake. The whole world is asleep, but their misery shows that the world is real, +their anguish shows that the world is real. + +The role of the guru is to give you a glimpse of the real — not a teaching, but an +awakening. The guru is not a teacher: the guru is an awakener. He has not to give you +doctrines. If he gives you doctrines, he is a philosopher. If he talks about the world as +illusory and argues and proves that the world is illusory, if he discusses, debates, if he +intellectually gives you a doctrine, he is not a guru, he is not a master. He may be a +teacher, a teacher of a particular doctrine, but he is not a master, not a guru. + +A guru is not a giver of doctrines. + +He is a giver of methods — of methods which can help you to come out of your sleep. + +That is why a guru is always a disturber of your dreams, and it is difficult to live with a +guru. It is very easy to live with a teacher because he never disturbs you. Rather, he goes +on increasing your accumulation of knowledge. He helps you to be more egoist; he +makes you more knowledgeable. Your ego is more fulfilled. Now you know more, you +can argue more. You can teach yourself, but a guru is always a disturber. He will disturb +your dream and your sleep, and you may have been dreaming a very beautiful dream. + +You may have been on a trip, a beautiful trip. He will disturb it, and you will get angry. + +A guru is always in danger from his disciples. Any moment they can kill him because he +is going to disturb; that is what his work is. He cannot help you to be yourself as you are +because you are false. He has to destroy your false identity. It is painful. That is why, +unless there is a very deep love, the work is impossible. A very deep intimacy is needed; +otherwise hate will be there. So a guru cannot allow you to be near him unless you have +surrendered; otherwise you are going to be an enemy. Only with your total surrender can +a guru work, because it is a spiritual surgery. + +Of necessity, much suffering will be there for the disciple, and if he is not in deep +intimacy with the guru it is impossible. + +He will not be ready to suffer so much. He has come in search of bliss and the guru gives +him suffering. He has come to feel euphoria, and the guru creates a hell for him. In the +beginning hell will be there because your image will be shattered, your expectations will +be shattered. Whatsoever you have known, you will have to throw it. Whatsoever you +are, he will undo it. Really, you are passing through a death. + +In India, in the old days, we said, "ACHARYA MRITYUH." It means that the master, the + + + +guru, is a death. He is! And unless you trust him so totally, this surgical operation is +impossible because in the beginning there will be suffering. Your anguish will come up; +all your suppressed hells will be revealed. And only if you believe, if you have deep faith +and trust in him, can you remain with him; otherwise you will escape, because this man is +disturbing you completely. + +So, remember, the guru's work is, his role is, to make you aware of your falsity, and +because of your false center your world is false. The world is not really illusory, it is not +MAYA. It is maya because your eyes are illusory. They are dream-filled. You project +your dreams all around, and the reality is falsified. The same world will become real +when your eyes are real. When the false center is broken and you are again rooted in your +real center, in your being, this world will become the NIRVANA. + + +Zen Masters have been continuously saying that this world is NIRVANA, this very world +is MOKSHA, liberation. It is only a question of eyes. With false eyes everything is +falsified; with real eyes everything is real. Your false entity creates a false world around +you. And don’t think that you all live in one world. You cannot! Each one lives in his +own world, and there are as many worlds as there are minds because each mind creates +its own world, its own milieu. Even if you are living in a family, the husband lives in his +own world and the wife in her own world, and there are collisions every day between +these two worlds. They never meet; they collide. Meeting is impossible. + +With mind there can be no meeting — only collision, conflict. When mind is not, there +can be a meeting. The wife lives in her own world, in her own expectations. The husband +for her is not the real husband that is there in the world, he is just her own image. The +husband lives in his own world, and the real wife is not his wife. He has an image of a +wife, and whenever this wife falls short of his image there is struggle, conflict, anger, +hatred. He loves his own image of a wife and the wife loves her own image of a husband, +and these both are illusory; they exist nowhere. This real wife is there and this real +husband is there, but they cannot meet because between these two real things are the +unreal wife and the unreal husband. + +They are always there; they won't allow a meeting of the real ones. + +Everyone is living in his own world, in his own dreams, expectations, projections. There +are as many worlds as there are minds. Those worlds are illusory, MAYA. When your +false center disappears, the whole world changes. Then it is a real world. Then for the +first time you see things as they are. Then there is no misery because with illusion +expectation disappears, and with reality there can be no misery. Then one comes to feel, +"It is so! Fact is fact!" Only with fictions are there problems, and fictions never allow you +to know fact. These fictions of the mind are MAYA. + +The role of the guru is to shatter the fictions so that the fact becomes available to you and +you become available to the fact. That "facticity" is truth. Once you know that facticity, +even the guru will be different. If you come to a guru now, you come with your own +image of him. Someone comes to me: he comes with his own image of me. And then, if I +am not following his image, he is in difficulty. But how am I to follow his image? And if +I try to follow everyone's image, I will be in a mess. And every disciple thinks I should +be like this or that; he has his own concept of a guru. If I am not fulfilling his concepts he +becomes frustrated, but this is how it is going to be. A disciple comes with a mind, and +this is the problem. + + + +I have to change his mind, to destroy it. He comes with a mind and he looks at me also +with his mind. + +I was staying in a home with a family. The family was Jaina, so they wouldn’t eat in the +night. The old man of the family, the grandfather, he was a lover of my books. He had +never seen me, and it is easy to love a book: a book is a dead thing. He came to meet me. +He was very old, and even to come from his room was difficult for him. He was ninety- +two, and he came to meet me. I told him I would come to his room, but he said, "No! I +respect you so much, I will come." So he came, and he was praising me very much. + +He said, "You are just like a TIRTHANKARA, like the highest in Jaina mythology, +Mahavira." The greatest teachers are known as TIRTHANKARAS, so he said, "You are +just like a TIRTHANKARA." He was praising and praising me, and then evening came +and darkness descended. + +Someone from the house came and said, "Now it is getting late. You come for your +evening meal." + +So I said, "Wait a little because of this old man. Let him say whatsoever he wants to say; +then I will come." + +The old man said, "What are you saying? Are you going to eat in the night?" + +I said, "It is okay with me." + +So he said, "I take my words back. You are no TIRTHANKARA. A person who doesn’t +even know that to eat in the night is the greatest sin, what else can he know?" + +Now this man cannot have any meeting with me. + +Impossible! If I was not eating in the night, I was a TIRTHANKARA, a great master. I +had not eaten yet. I had just said that I would eat in the night, and suddenly I am no more +a TIRTHANKARA. The old man said to me, "I have come to learn something from you, +but now that is impossible. Now I feel I must teach you something." + +When this world becomes an illusion, your guru will also be part of it and will disappear. +That is why, when the disciple awakens, there is no guru. This will seem very +paradoxical: when the disciple REALLY awakens, there is no guru. + +There are beautiful songs of Saraha, a Buddhist mystic. With every song the last ending +line is "and Saraha disappeared." He teaches something; he gives some teachings. He +says, "Neither the world is nor the NIRVANA is, neither the good nor the bad. Go +beyond, and Saraha disappears." It has been a puzzle. Why does Saraha go on saying +"and Saraha disappears"? + +If you really attain to the song, to whatsoever he has said — "There is neither good nor +bad, nor the world nor the NIRVANA" — if the disciple really awakens to this, Saraha +will disappear. Where will be the guru? The guru was part of the disciple's world. Now +there will be no entities like the guru and the disciple; they will have become one. When +the disciple awakens, he becomes the guru, and Saraha disappears. Then the guru is no +more there. Even the guru is part of your dream, of your illusioned world. + +But because of this many problems arise. + +Krishnamurti goes on saying there is no teacher — and he is right. This is the ultimate +truth. When you have awakened, you are the teacher and there is no other teacher. But +this is the ultimate truth, and before this happens the teacher is because the disciple is. +The disciple creates the teacher; it is the disciple's need. + +So remember this: if you meet a wrong teacher, you deserve a wrong teacher; that is why +you meet a wrong teacher. A wrong disciple cannot meet a right teacher. You create your + + + +teacher, your master. A small teacher or a great teacher depends on you; you will meet +the person you deserve. If you meet a wrong person it is because of you. You are +responsible for it, not the wrong person. The guru also is part of your mind, it is part of +the dreamworld. But unless you become awakened, you will need someone to disturb +you, someone to help. This someone is a guru if he gives you methods. He is simply a +teacher if he gives you only doctrines, principles, teachings, but you may need him right +now. + +Think of it in this way: even in a dream there is something which can help you to come +out of it. Even in a dream something can help you to come out of it. You can try it just +while falling asleep. Go on repeating in the mind, "Whenever there is a dream, my eyes +will open." For three weeks go on continuously repeating it just when you are falling +asleep: "Whenever there is a dream, my eyes will open; suddenly I will be awakened." + +And you will be awakened. Even from a dream you can be awakened by a certain +method. Just when falling asleep, say to yourself — if your name is Ram, say — "Ram, +awaken me at five o'clock in the morning." Repeat it twice, and then silently fall asleep. +Sooner or later you will get the trick. Exactly at 5:00 someone will awaken you. Even in +dream, even in sleep, methods can be used which will awaken you. The same is the case +for the spiritual sleep you are in. + +A master can give you methods which will be helpful for this. Then whenever you are +falling into a dream, the methods will not allow you to fall, or whenever you have fallen +into a dream suddenly you will be awakened. When this awakening becomes natural to +you there is no need for the guru. When you have awakened the guru disappears, but you +will still feel gratitude for the guru because he helped you. + +Sariputta was one of the greatest disciples of Buddha. He became enlightened in his own +right; he became a buddha himself. Then Buddha said to Sariputta, "Now you can go and +move; now my presence is not needed for you. You yourself have become a master in +your own right, so you can go and help others to come out of their sleep." + +Sariputta, when leaving Buddha, touched his feet. Someone asked Sariputta, "You +yourself have become enlightened, so why are you touching Buddha's feet?" + +Sariputta said, "Now there is no need to touch his feet, but this situation could happen +only because of him. + +Now there is no need, but this could happen only because of him." + +Sariputta moved away, but wherever he was, in the morning he would prostrate himself +in the direction where Buddha was; in the evening he would prostrate himself and +everyone would ask, "What are you doing? To whom you are prostrating yourself?" +because Buddha was far away, miles away. + +He would say, "To my teacher who has disappeared. I am myself now the guru, but it was +not possible before him. It became possible only because of him." So even when the +teacher disappears, when the guru disappears, the disciple will feel a deep gratitude, the +greatest gratitude that is possible. + +There is a need while you are asleep for someone to disturb you. And if you allow +someone, that is what surrender means. If you say, "Okay, I allow you to disturb me," +that is what surrender means — a trust. Trust means that now even if this man leads you +towards misery, you will be ready to move. You will not question him anymore. +Wherever he leads you, you trust in him. He is not going to hann you. + +If you don't trust, then no progress is possible because you feel he is going to harm you. + + + +You feel, in your terms, that he is going to harm you in many ways, and if you think, "I +am to protect myself," then no further work is possible. If you mistrust your surgeon, you +will not allow him to make you unconscious. + +You don’t know what he is going to do, and you will say, "Do the operation, but allow me +to be conscious so I can go on seeing what you are doing. I cannot trust you." + +You trust your surgeon. He makes you unconscious because things are such that in your +conscious state surgery would be impossible to do; your consciousness would interfere. +That is why trust is blind. It means you are ready even to become unconscious, even to +become blind. You are ready to follow him wherever he leads. Only then does a deeper, +inner surgery become possible. And it is not only a physical, physiological surgery; it is +psychological. Much pain will be felt, much anguish, because catharsis is needed and you +have to be thrown back to your own center which you have forgotten completely, pulled +back to your roots again which you have left behind miles away. + +This is going to be arduous and difficult; it even takes years. But if the disciple is ready +to surrender, it can even happen in seconds. It depends on the intensity of surrender. +Unnecessary time is wasted because the guru has to go slowly — slowly so that you are +prepared to trust more, and he has to do many things unnecessarily just to create trust. + +Just to do the surgery he has to create many things unnecessarily which can be discarded. +No need to waste time and energy on them, but they are needed just to create trust. + +I quoted Saraha; Saraha is one of the eighty-four SIDDHAS — one of the eighty-four +Buddhist mystics — who attained. + +Saraha says to those disciples who have become masters, "Behave in such a way that +others can trust you. I know now that you need no morality; I know now that you need no +rules. You have gone beyond, and you can do whatsoever you like and you can be +whatsoever you like. Now, no system, no morality exists for you. But behave in such a +way so that disciples can trust you." So great masters have behaved in such a way that the +society approves. It is not because they need to behave in that way; it is only an +unnecessary thing to create trust. So if Mahavira behaves in the pattern that Jainas have +set, it is not because there is any inner necessity. He behaves that way only so that Jainas +can follow and become disciples, so that they can trust. + +That is why many problems arise whenever a teacher starts behaving in a new way. Jesus +behaved in a new way which was not known to the Jewish community. There was +nothing wrong in it, but this became the problem. Jews couldn’t trust him. Their masters +of old had behaved differently and this man was behaving differently. He was not +following the rules of the game, so they couldn’t trust him. Thus, they had to crucify him. +And why did Jesus behave in such a way? India was behind it. He was here for many +years before he appeared in Jerusalem. He was taught here in a Buddhist monastery, and +he tried to follow Buddhist rules there where no Buddhist society existed. + +In a Jewish community he was behaving as if he was living in a Buddhist community, +and that created the whole problem. He was killed, misunderstood, murdered, and the +reason was only this — that Jews couldn’t trust him. + +A teacher, a guru, has unnecessarily to create many things around him, to do many +things, just to create trust. But even then, problems arise because everyone comes with +his own expectations: "The guru must be like this or like that." + +Surrender means you leave your expectations, you allow the guru to be as he is and you + + + +allow him to do whatsoever he wants to do. Even if pain results, you are ready for it. +Even if he leads you towards death you are ready for it, because ultimately he will lead +you to a deep death. Only after it is rebirth possible. Resurrection is possible only when +your old identity has been crucified. + +THE END. + + + +Chapter 37: Techniques to witness the flux-like film of life + + +IN MOODS OF EXTREME DESIRE, BE UNDISTURBED. + +THIS SO-CALLED UNIVERSE APPEARS AS A JUGGLING, A PICTURE SHOW. + +TO BE HAPPY, LOOK UPON IT SO. + +OH BELOVED, PUT ATTENTION NEITHER ON PLEASURE NOR ON PAIN, BUT +BETWEEN THESE. + +OBJECTS AND DESIRES EXIST IN ME AS IN OTHERS. SO ACCEPTING, LET +THEM BE TRANSFORMED. + +The original mind is like a mirror: it is pure, and it remains pure, but dust can gather upon +it. The purity is not lost, the dust cannot destroy the purity — but the purity can be +covered up. This is the condition of the ordinary mind — covered with dust. Hidden +behind the dust, the original mind remains pure. It cannot become impure; that is +impossible. And if it was possible for it to become impure, then there would be no way to +regain the purity again. In itself it remains pure, just covered by dust. + +Our mind is the original mind plus dust, the buddha-mind plus dust, the divine mind plus +dust. Once you know how to uncover it, how to reclaim it from the dust, you have known +all that is worth knowing and you have attained all that is worth attaining. All these +techniques are concerned with how to free your mind from the day-to-day dust that is +bound to gather upon it. Dust is but natural. Just like with a traveler passing from many, +many roads, dust is gathered — and for many, many lives you have been a traveler. You +have traveled long distances, and much dust has gathered. + + +Many points have to be understood before we enter the techniques. One, the East is +basically different from the West in its attitude towards inner transformation. Christianity +thinks that something has happened to man's being itself — the sin. The East thinks that +nothing has happened to the being itself; nothing can happen. The being remains in its +absolute purity; there has been no sin. So man is not condemned in the East, he is not +something degraded. On the contrary, he remains the divine that he is, that he has always +been, and it is natural that dust will gather. Dust is bound to gather. + +So there is no sin, just a false identification. + +We become identified with the mind, with the dust. Our experience, our knowledge, our +memories, all are dust. Whatsoever you have known, whatsoever you have experienced, +whatsoever has been your past, is all dust. Regaining the original mind means regaining +the purity — without experiences, without knowledge, without memories, without the +past. + +The whole past is dust, but we are identified with the past and not with the consciousness +that is always present. Think of it in this way: whatsoever you know is always of the past, +and you are here and now in the present. All your knowledge is dust. "Knowing" is your +purity, knowledge is dust. The capacity to know, the energy to know, knowing, is your +original nature. + +Through that knowing you gather knowledge. That knowledge is dust-like. Here and +now, this very moment, you are absolutely pure, but you are not identified with this +purity, you are identified with the past, the accumulated past. So all meditative + + + +techniques are basically methods to remove yourself from the past and to allow you to +plunge into the here and now. + +Buddha was searching for how to regain this purity of consciousness, how to be free from +the past, because unless you are free from the past you will remain in bondage, you will +be a slave. The past is heavy on you, and because of the past the present is never known. +The past is known; the present is a very minute atomic moment. You go on missing it +because of the past, and because of the past you go on projecting into the future. The past +is projected into the future, and both are false. The past is no more, the future is yet to be. +Both are not, and that which is, is hidden between these two which are not. + +Buddha was in search; he went from one teacher to another. He searched, and he went to +many teachers, all of the known teachers. He consulted them, he allowed them to work +upon him, he cooperated. He disciplined himself in many ways, but he was not fulfilled, +and the difficulty was this: the teachers were interested in the future, in some liberated +state somewhere beyond death, after the life is over. + +They were interested in some God, some nirvana, some moksha -some liberated state — +somewhere in the future, and Buddha was interested in the here and now, so there was +really no meeting. He said to every teacher, "I am interested in the here and now, in how +to be total, complete and pure here and now." And they would say, "Apply this method, +do this, and if you do it rightly, someday in the future, in some future life, in some future +state, you will attain." + +Sooner or later he left every teacher, and then he tried by himself alone. What did he do? +He did a very simple thing. Once you know it, it is very simple and obvious, but when +you don’t know it, it is so arduous and so difficult, it seems impossible. He did only one +thing: he remained with the present moment. He forgot his past and he forgot his future. +He said, "I will be here and now. I will simply exist." If you can exist even for a single +moment, you have known the taste — the taste of your pure consciousness. And once it is +tasted you can never forget it. Then the taste, the flavor, remains with you, and that flavor +becomes a transfonnation. + +Many are the ways how to uncover yourself from your past, how to throw the dust and +have a look into the mirror of your own mind. All these techniques are different ways, +but with every technique a deep understanding is needed: remember that. These +techniques are not mechanical because they are to uncover consciousness. + +They are not mechanical things. You can use these techniques mechanically, and if you +use them as mechanical techniques you may gain a certain stillness of mind, but that +won’t be the original purity. You may gain a certain silence, but that silence will he +cultivated. That too belongs to the dust part of the mind, not to the original layer. Don't +use them mechanically. A deep understanding is needed, and with understanding they can +be helpful to uncover your being. + +The first technique: + +"IN MOODS OF EXTREME DESIRE, BE UNDISTURBED." + +"IN MOODS OF EXTREME DESIRE, BE UNDISTURBED": When desire grips you, +you are disturbed. Of course, that is natural. Desire grips you, then your mind starts +wavering and many ripples go on, on the surface. The desire pulls you somewhere into +the future; the past pushes you somewhere in the future. You are disturbed, you are not at +ease. Desire is, therefore, a "dis-ease." + + + +This sutra says, "IN MOODS OF EXTREME DESIRE, BE UNDISTURBED." But how +to be undisturbed? Desire means disturbance, so how to be undisturbed — and in extreme +moments of desire? You will have to do certain experiments; only then will you +understand what it means. You are in anger, anger grips you, you are temporarily mad, +possessed, you are no more in your senses. Suddenly remember to be undisturbed — as if +you are undressing. Inside, become naked, naked from the anger, undressed. + +Anger will be there, but now you have a point within you which is not disturbed. + +You will know that anger is there on the periphery. Like fever, it is there. The periphery +is wavering; the periphery is disturbed. But you can look at it. If you can look at it, you +will be undisturbed. Become a witness to it, and you will be undisturbed. This +undisturbed point is your original mind. The original mind cannot be disturbed; it is +never disturbed — but you have never looked at it. When anger is there, you become +identified with the anger. You forget that anger is something other than you. You become +one with it, and you start acting through it, you start doing something through it. + +Two things can be done. In anger you will be violent to someone, to the object of your +anger. Then you have moved to the other. Anger is just in between you and the other. +Here I am, then there is anger, and there you are — the object of my anger. From anger I +can travel in two dimensions: either I can travel to you; then you become my center of +consciousness, the object of my anger. Then my mind becomes focused on you, the one +who has insulted me. This is one way how you can travel from anger. There is another +way: you can travel to yourself. You don’t move to the person whom you feel has caused +the anger. You move to the person who feels to be angry; you move to the subject and not +to the object. + + +Ordinarily, we go on moving to the object. If you move to the object, the dust part of +your mind is disturbed, and you will feel, "T am disturbed." If you move within to the +center of your own being, you will be able to witness the dust part; you will be able to see +that the dust part of the mind is disturbed, but "I am not disturbed." And you can +experiment upon this with any desire, any disturbance. + +A sexual desire comes to your mind; your whole body is taken by it. You can move to the +sexual object, the object of your desire. The object may be there, it may not be there. You +can move to the object in imagination also. But then you will get more and more +disturbed. The further you go away from your center, the more you will be disturbed. +Really, the distance and disturbance are always in proportion. The more distant you are +from your center, the more you are disturbed; the nearer you are to the center, the less +you are disturbed. If you are just at the center, there is no disturbance. + +In a cyclone, there is a center which is undisturbed — in the cyclone of anger, the cyclone +of sex, the cyclone of any desire. Just in the center there is no cyclone, and a cyclone +cannot exist without a silent center. The anger also cannot exist without something within +you which is beyond anger. + +Remember this: nothing can exist without its opposite. The opposite is needed there. + +Without it, there is no possibility of it existing. If there were no center within you which +remains unmoved, no movement would be possible there. If there were no center within +you which remains undisturbed, no disturbance could happen to you. Analyze this and +observe this. If there were no center of absolute undisturbance in you, how could you feel + + + +that you are disturbed? You need a comparison. You need two points to compare. +Suppose a person is ill: he feels illness because somewhere within him, a point, a center +of absolute health exists. That is why he can compare. You say that your head is aching. +How is it that you know about this ache, this headache? If you were the headache, you +could not know it. You must be someone else, something else — the observer, the +witness, who can say, "My head is aching." + +This ache can be felt only by something which is not the ache. If you are ill, you are +feverish, you can feel it because you are not the fever. The fever cannot feel that there is +fever; someone is needed who is beyond it. A polarity is needed. When you are in anger, +and if you feel you are in anger, it means that a point exists within you which is still +undisturbed and which can be a witness. You may not look at that point, that is another +thing. You may not see yourself at that point, that is another thing. But it is there always +in its pristine purity; it is there. + + +This sutra says, "IN MOODS OF EXTREME DESIRE, BE UNDISTURBED." What can +you do? This technique is not for suppression. This technique is not saying that when +there is anger suppress it and remain undisturbed — no! If you suppress, you will create +more disturbance. If the anger is there and an effort to suppress is there, it will double the +disturbance. When anger is there, close your doors, meditate on the anger, allow the +anger to be. You remain undisturbed, and don't suppress it. + +It is easy to suppress; it is easy to express. We do both. We express if the situation +allows, and if it is convenient and not dangerous for you. If you can harm the other and +the other cannot harm you, you will express the anger. If it is dangerous, if the other can +hann you more, if your boss or whoever you are angry at is more strong, you will +suppress it. + +Expression and suppression are easy, witnessing is difficult. Witnessing is neither; it is +not suppressing, it is not expressing. It is not expressing because you are not expressing it +to the object of anger. It is not being suppressed either. You are allowing it to be +expressed — expressed in a vacuum. You are meditating on it. + +Stand before a mirror and express your anger — and be a witness to it. You are alone, so +you can meditate on it. Do whatsoever you want to do, but in a vacuum. If you want to +beat someone, beat the empty sky. + +If you want to be angry, be angry; if you want to scream, scream. But do it alone, and +remember yourself as a point which is seeing all this, this drama. Then it becomes a +psychodrama, and you can laugh at it and it will be a deep catharsis for you. Afterwards +you will feel relieved of it — and not only relieved of it, you will have gained something +through it. You will have matured; a growth will have come to you. And now you will +know that even while you were in anger there was a center within you which was +undisturbed. Now try to uncover this center more and more, and it is easy to uncover it in +desire. + +That is why tantra is not against desire. It says be in desire, but remember the center +which is undisturbed. So tantra says that even sex can be used. Move in sex, but remain +undisturbed. Be a witness. Go on being a deep observer. Whatsoever is happening, is +happening on the periphery; you are just an onlooker, a spectator. + +This technique can be very useful, and much benefit can happen to you through it. But it +will be difficult because when you become disturbed, you forget everything. You may + + + +forget that you have to meditate. Then try it in this way: don’t wait for the moment when +anger happens to you. Don’t wait for the moment! Just close your room, and think of +some past experience of anger when you went mad. Remember it, and re-enact it. That +will be easy for you. + +Re-enact it again, do it again, relive it. Do not just remember it, relive it. Remember that +someone had insulted you and what was said and how you reacted to him. React again, +replay it. + +You may not know that mind is just a tape-recording device. And now scientists say, now +it is a scientific fact, that if your memory centers are touched with electrodes, they start +replaying. For example, you were once angry: the incident is recorded, in the same +sequence as it happened, just as if on a tape-recording in your brain. If it is touched by an +electrode, it mill start replaying. You will have the same feeling again. Your eyes will go +red, your body will start trembling and will become feverish, the whole thing will be re- +enacted. The moment the electrode is put away, it stops. If you give it energy again, it +starts from the very beginning again. + +Now they say that mind is a recording machine, and you can re-enact anything. But don't +just remember: relive. Start feeling the experience again, and the mind will get the idea. +The incident will come to you; you will relive it. In reliving it, remain undisturbed. Start +from the past. This is easy because now it is a play, the actual situation is not there. And +if you become capable of doing this, then you will be able to do it when the situation for +anger is really there, when a real situation is there. And this can be done with every +desire, and it is to be done with every desire. + + +This re-enacting something from the past will do much. Everyone has scars in his mind; +unhealed wounds are there. If you re-enact them, you will be unburdened. If you can go +to your past and do something which has remained incomplete, you will be unburdened +from your past. Your mind will become fresher; the dust will be thrown away. Remember +in your past something which you feel has remained suspended. You wanted to kill +someone, you wanted to love someone, you wanted this and that, and that has remained +incomplete. + +That incomplete thing goes on hovering on the mind like a cloud. It influences everything +that you are and that you are doing. That cloud has to be dispersed. Move back on the +time track and bring back desires which have remained incomplete, and relive the +wounds which are still green. They will be healed. You will become more whole, and +through this you will have the knack of how to remain undisturbed in a situation which is +disturbed. + +"IN MOODS OF EXTREME DESIRE, BE UNDISTURBED." Gurdjieff used this +technique very much. He created situations, but to create situations a school is needed. +You cannot do that alone. Gurdjieff had a small school in Fontainebleau, and he was a +taskmaster. He knew how to create situations. You would enter the room, and a group +would be sitting there. You would enter the room where a group was sitting, and +something would be done so that you would get angry. + +And it would be done so naturally that you could never imagine that some situation was +being created for you. But it was a device. Someone would insult you by saying +something, and you would get disturbed. Then everyone would help the disturbance and + + + +you would become mad. And when you were right at the point where you could explode, +Gurdjieff would shout, "Remember! Remain undisturbed!" + +A situation can be created, but only in a school where many persons are working on +themselves. And when Gurdjieff would shout, "Remember! Remain undisturbed," now +you would know that this was a created situation. The disturbance cannot disappear so +suddenly, so immediately, because it has physical roots. Your glands had thrown poison +in the blood; your body had become affected. + +Anger cannot disappear so immediately. Even now that you had come to know that you +had been deceived, that no one was insulting you and no one meant anything by it, it +would be difficult to do anything. The anger is there, your body is filled with it — but +suddenly your temperature cools down. Only on the body, on the periphery, does the +anger remain. At the center you suddenly cool down, and you know that a point exists +within you which is undisturbed. You start laughing. Your eyes are red with anger; your +face is violent, animal-like, but you start laughing. You know two things now — a point +which is undisturbed and a periphery which is disturbed. + + +You can help. Your family can become a school; you can help each other. Friends can +become a school and they can help each other. You can decide with your family... the +whole family can decide that now a situation has to be created for the father or for the +mother, and then the whole family works to create the situation. When the father or +mother goes completely mad, then everyone starts laughing and says, "Remain +completely undisturbed." You can help each other, and the experience is simply +wonderful. Once you know a cool center within you in a hot situation, you cannot forget +it, and then in any hot situation you can remember it, reclaim it, regain it. + +In the West now one technique, a therapeutic technique, is used; it is called psychodrama. +It helps, and it is also based on techniques like this. In psychodrama you just enact, you +just play a game. In the beginning it is a game, but sooner or later you become possessed. +And when you become possessed your mind starts functioning, because your mind and +your body function automatically. They function automatically! + +So if you see an actor acting in a psychodrama who, in a situation of anger, really +becomes angry, you may thi nk that he is simply acting, but it is not so. He might have +really become angry; it may not be acting at all now. He is possessed by the desire, by the +disturbance, by the feeling, by the mood, and if he is really possessed, only then does his +acting look real. + + +Your body cannot know whether you are playing or whether you are doing it for real. +You may have observed yourself at some time in your life that you were just playing at +being angry, and you didn’t know when the anger became real, or you were just playing +and you were not feeling sexual. You were playing with your wife or with your +girlfriend, or with your husband, and then suddenly it became real. The body takes it, and +the body can be deceived. The body cannot know whether it is real or unreal, particularly +with sex. If you imagine it your body thinks it is real. + +Sex is one of the most imaginary centers in the body, so just by imagining, you can have +a sexual orgasm. You can deceive the body. In dream, you can have a sexual release; +even in dream, the body is deceived. You are not making love to anyone; just in dream, +in fantasy, in imagination, you are making love. But the body can release sexual energy, + + + +and even a deep orgasm can be felt. What is happening? How is the body deceived? The +body cannot know what is real and what is unreal. Once you start doing something, the +body thinks it is real and it starts behaving in a real way. + +Psychodrama is a technique based on such methods. You are not angry, you are simply +acting angry — and then you get into it. But psychodrama is beautiful because you know +that you are simply acting, and then on the periphery anger becomes real, and just behind +it you are hidden and looking at it. + +Now you know that you are not disturbed, but the anger is there, the disturbance is there. +The disturbance is there, and yet the disturbance is not. + +This feeling of two forces working simultaneously gives you a transcendence, and then in +real anger also you can feel it. Once you know how to feel it, you can feel it in real +situations also. Use this technique; this will change your total life. Once you know how +to remain undisturbed, the world is not misery for you. Then nothing can create any +confusion in you, really, .nothing can hurt you. Now there is no suffering for you, and +once you know it you can do another thing. + +Gurdjieff used to do it. He was able to change his face at any moment. He would be +laughing, he would be smiling, he would be looking happy with you, and suddenly he +would become angry without any cause. And it is reported about him that he became so +proficient at this art that if two persons were sitting near him, one on each side, he could +be angry with half of his face and he could be smiling with the other half of his face. + +Then one person would report, "What a beautiful man Gurdjieff is," and the other would +say, "What an ugly man! " He would look at one person from one side smiling, and he +would look at the other side angrily. + +Once you can detach your center from the periphery, you can do it. Once the center is +detached completely, if you can remain undisturbed in anger, in desire, you can play with +desires, with anger, with disturbances. + + +This technique is to create a feeling of two extremes within you. They are there, two +polar opposites are there. Once you become aware of this polarity, you become for the +first time a master of yourself. Otherwise others are your masters; you are just a slave. +Your wife knows, your son knows, your father knows, your friends know, that you can be +pushed and pulled. You can be disturbed, you can be made happy and unhappy. If +someone else can make you happy and unhappy, you are not a master, you are just a +slave. The other has a hold. Just by a single gesture he can make you unhappy; just by a +small smile be can make you happy. + +So you are just at the mercy of someone else; the other can do anything to you. And if +this is the situation, then all your reactions are simply reactions, not actions. You simply +react. If someone insults you and you become angry, your anger is not an action, it is a +reaction. If someone appreciates you and you start smiling and feeling good, great, this is +a reaction, not an action. + +Buddha was passing by a village, and some persons gathered there. They were against +him, and they insulted him. Buddha listened, and then he said, "I am to reach to the other +village in time, so can I go now? If you have said whatsoever you have come to say, if it +is finished, then I can move. Or, if you have to say something more to me, while +returning I will wait here. + + + +You can come and tell me." + +Those persons were just surprised. They couldn’t understand. They had been insulting +him, using bad words, abusing him, so they said, "But we are not saying something to +you, we are abusing and insulting you. + +" Buddha said, "You can do that, but if you want any reaction from me you have come +late. Ten years before, if you had come with such words, I would have reacted. But now I +have learned how to act, I am a master of myself now; you cannot force me to do +anything. So you will have to go back. You cannot disturb me; nothing can disturb me +now because I have known my own center." + +This knowledge of the center or this grounding in the center makes you a master. +Otherwise you are a slave, and a slave of so many — not only of one master, but of many. +Everything is a master, and you are a slave to the whole universe. Obviously, you will be +in trouble. With so many masters pulling you in so many directions and dimensions, you +are never together; you are not in a unity, and pulled in so many dimensions, you are in +anguish. Only a master of oneself can transcend anguish. + +The second technique: + +"THIS SO-CALLED UNIVERSE APPEARS AS A JUGGLING, A PICTURE SHOW. +TO BE HAPPY LOOK UPON IT SO." + +This whole world is just like a drama, so don’t be too serious about it. Seriousness will +force you into trouble, you will get into trouble. + +Don’t be serious about it. Nothing is serious; this whole world is just a drama. + +If you can look to the whole world as a drama you will regain your original +consciousness. The dust gathers because you are so serious. That seriousness creates +problems, and we are so serious that even while seeing a drama we gather dust. Go to a +picture house and look at the spectators. Don’t look at the screen, forget the picture; don't +look at the screen; just look at the spectators in the hall. Someone will be weeping and +tears will be rolling down, someone will be laughing, someone will become sexually +excited. Just look at people. What are they doing? What is happening to them? And there +is nothing on the screen, just pictures — pictures of light and shadow. The screen is +vacant. + +But how are they getting excited? They are weeping, crying, laughing. The picture is not +just a picture; the film is not just a film. They have forgotten that it is just a story. They +have taken it seriously. It has "become alive" ! It is "real" ! And this is happening +everywhere, not only in a picture house. Look at the life that is all around you. What is +it? + +Many people have lived on this earth. Where you are sitting, at least ten dead bodies are +buried in that place, and they too were serious like you. Now they are no more. Where +have their lives gone? Where have their problems gone? They were fighting — fighting +for a single inch of earth, and the earth is there and they are no more. + + +And I am not saying that their problems were not problems. They were — as your +problems are problems. They were "serious" — problems of life and death. But where are +their problems? And if the whole humanity should disappear anyday, the earth will be +there, the trees will grow, the rivers will flow and the sun will rise, and the earth will not +feel any absence or wonder where humanity is. + + + +Look at the expanse: look backwards, look forwards, look to all dimensions at what you +are, what your life is. It looks like a long dream, and everything that you take so seriously +this moment becomes useless the next moment. You may not even remember it. +Remember your first love, how serious it was. Life depended on it. Now you don't +remember it at all, it is forgotten. And whatsoever you are thinking that your life depends +on today will be forgotten. Life is a flux, nothing remains. It is like a moving film, +everything changing into everything else. But in the moment you feel it is very serious, +and you get disturbed. This technique says, "THIS SO-CALLED UNIVERSE APPEARS +AS A JUGGLING, A PICTURE SHOW. TO BE HAPPY, LOOK UPON IT SO." + +In India, we have called this world not a creation of God, but a play, a game, a LEELA. +This concept of LEELA is beautiful, because creation seems serious. The Christian, the +Jewish God is very serious. Even for a single disobedience, Adam was thrown out of the +Garden of Eden — and not only was he thrown out, because of him, the whole humanity. + +He was our father, and we are suffering because of him. God seems to be so serious. He +should not be disobeyed. And if he is disobeyed, he is going to take revenge, and the +revenge has been so long. + +The sin doesn't seem to be so serious. Really, Adam committed it because of God's own +foolishness. God the Father said to Adam, "Don’t go near the tree, the Tree of +Knowledge, and don’t eat its fruit." This prohibition becomes an invitation, and this is +psychological. In that big garden, only that Tree of Knowledge became attractive. It was +prohibited. Any psychologist can say, God committed an error. If the fruit of that tree +was not to be eaten, it was good not to talk about it at all. There was no possibility of +Adam reaching to that tree, and the whole humanity would have been in the garden. But +this saying, this order, "Don’t eat," created the trouble; this "don’t" created the whole +trouble. + +Because Adam disobeyed he was thrown out of heaven, and the revenge seems so long. +And Christians say Jesus was crucified just to redeem us — to redeem us from that sin +that Adam committed. So the whole Christian concept of history hangs on two persons — +Adam and Jesus. Adam committed the sin, and Jesus suffered to redeem us from it and +allowed himself to be crucified. He suffered so that Adam's sin may be forgiven. But it +doesn't seem that God has forgiven yet. Jesus was crucified, but humanity goes on +suffering in the same way. + + +The very concept of God as a father is ugly, serious. The Indian concept is not of a +creator. God is just a player; he is not serious. This is just a game. Rules are there, but +rules of a game. You need not be serious about them. Nothing is sin — only error, and you +suffer because of error, not because God punishes you. You suffer because of the rules +you don’t follow. God is not punishing you. The whole concept of LEELA gives life a +dramatic color; it becomes a long drama. And this technique is based on this concept: +"THIS SO-CALLED UNIVERSE APPEARS AS A JUGGLING, A PICTURE SHOW. +TO BE HAPPY, LOOK UPON IT SO." + +If you are unhappy, you have taken it too seriously. And don’t try to find any way how to +be happy. Just change your attitude. You cannot be happy with a serious mind. With a +festive mind, you can be happy. Take this whole life as a myth, as a story. It is one, but +once you take it this way you will not be unhappy. Unhappiness comes out of too much +seriousness. Try for seven days; for seven days remember only one thing — that the + + + +whole world is just a drama — and you will not be the same again. Just for seven days! +You are not going to lose much because you don’t have anything to lose. + +You can try it. For seven days take everything as a drama, just as a show. These seven +days will give you many glimpses of your buddha nature, of your inner purity. + +And once you have the glimpse you cannot be the same again. You will be happy, and +you cannot conceive of what type of happiness can happen to you because you have not +known any happiness. You have known only degrees of unhappiness: sometimes you +were more unhappy, sometimes less unhappy, and when you were less unhappy you +called it happiness. You don't know what happiness is because you cannot know. When +you have a concept of the world in which you are taking it very seriously, you cannot +know what happiness is. Happiness happens only when you are grounded in this attitude, +that the world is just a play. + +So try this, and do everything in a very festive way, celebrating, doing an "act" — not a +real thing. If you are a husband, play, be a play husband; if you are a wife, be a play wife. +Make it just a game. And there are rules, of course; any game to be played needs rules. +Marriage is a rule and divorce is a rule, but don’t be serious about them. They are rules, +and one rule begets another. Divorce is bad; because marriage is bad: one rule begets +another! But don’t take them seriously, and then look how the quality of your life +immediately changes. + +Go to your home this night, and behave with your wife or husband or your children as if +you are doing a part in a drama, and see the beauty of it. If you are playing a part you will +try to be efficient, but you will not get disturbed. + +There is no need. You will do the part and go to sleep. But remember, it is a part, and for +seven days continuously follow this attitude. Then happiness can happen to you, and +once you know what happiness is you need not move into unhappiness, because it is your +choice. + +You are unhappy because you have chosen a wrong attitude towards life. You can be +happy if you choose a right attitude. Buddha pays so much attention to "right attitude." + +He makes it a base, a foundation — "right attitude." What is right attitude? What is the +criterion? To me this is the criterion: the attitude that makes you happy is the right +attitude, and there is no objective criterion. The attitude that makes you unhappy and +miserable is the wrong attitude. The criterion is subjective; your happiness is the +criterion. + +The third technique: + +"OH BELOVED, PUT ATTENTION NEITHER ON PLEASURE NOR ON PAIN, BUT +BETWEEN THESE." + +Everything is polar, and mind moves from one polarity to another, never staying in +between. Have you known any moment when you were neither happy nor unhappy? + +Have you known any moment when you were neither healthy nor sick? Have you known +any moment when you were neither this nor that, when you were just in between, just in +the middle, right in the middle? Mind moves from one pole to another immediately. If +you are happy, sooner or later you will move to unhappiness, and you will move +immediately: the happiness will disappear and you will be unhappy. + + + +If you are feeling good, sooner or later you will feel bad, and there is no point where you +stay in between. You move immediately from this to that. Just like the pendulum of an +old clock, you move from left to right, from right to left, and the pendulum goes on +moving. There is a secret law: when the pendulum is going to the left, it appears to be +going to the left, but it is gathering momentum to go right. When it is going to the left, it +is gathering energy, momentum, to go right; when it is going right, it is gathering +momentum to go left. So what appears is not the whole. When you are becoming happy, +you are gathering momentum to be unhappy. So whenever I see you laughing, the +moment is not far away when you will be weeping. + +In Indian villages, the mothers know this, so when a child starts laughing too much they +say, "Stop him; otherwise he will weep." It is bound to be so. If a child is so much happy, +the next step can be nothing but unhappiness. Thus, they stop him. Otherwise he will be +unhappy. But the same applies to the reverse, and that is not known. When a child is +weeping and you try to stop him, you are not only stopping his weeping; you are stopping +his next step. He cannot be happy now. When a child is weeping, allow him. Help him to +weep more so that when weeping is finished he has gathered momentum. Now he can +move to the right, he can be happy. + + +Now psychoanalysts say that when a child is weeping and screaming, don't stop him, +don’t try to persuade him, don't distract him. Don't try to focus his mind somewhere else; +don’t bribe him to stop. Don’t do anything. Just remain silent near him, and allow him to +weep and cry and scream so that he can move easily to happiness. Otherwise, neither will +he be able to weep nor will he be able to be happy. That is how we all have become. We +cannot do anything. The smile is half-hearted, the tear is also half-hearted; everything is +confusion. + +But this is the natural law of mind. It moves from one pole to another. This technique is +to change this natural law: "OH BELOVED, PUT ATTENTION NEITHER ON +PLEASURE NOR ON PAIN, BUT BETWEEN THESE." Any of the polarities can be +chosen, and try to be just in between. What can you do to be in between? How will you +be in between? One thing: when pain is there, what can you do? When pain is there, you +want to escape from it. You don’t want it; you try to go away from it. Your effort is to go +to the opposite — to be happy, to be joyful. + +When there is happiness, what do you do? Your effort is to cling to it so that the other +pole may not enter — to CLING to it! When happiness is there you cling; when pain is +there you escape. This is the natural attitude. If you want to change this natural law and +transcend it, when pain is there don't try to escape. + +Remain with it. You will disturb the whole natural mechanism. You have a headache: +remain with it. Close your eyes, meditate on the headache; remain with it. Don't do +anything. Just be a witness; don’t try to escape. + +When happiness is there and you are feeling especially blissful in any particular moment, +don’t cling to it. Close your eyes and remain a witness to it all. Clinging or escaping are +natural for the dust-covered mind. If you remain a witness, sooner or later you will fall in +between because the natural law is to move to the polarity, to the polar opposite. If you +remain a witness, you are in between. + +Buddha has called his whole philosophy MAJJHIM NIKAYA — the middle way, because +of this technique. He says remain in the middle always; no matter what the polarity, + + + +remain always in the middle. By witnessing one remains in the middle. The moment you +lose your witnessing you either become attached or repulsed. If you are repulsed you will +go to the other extreme; if you are attached you will try to remain at this extreme, but you +will never be in between. Just be a witness. Don't be attracted, don’t be repulsed. The +headache is there; accept it. It is there as a fact. As a tree is there, as the house is there, as +the night is there, the headache is there. Accept it and close your eyes. Don’t try to escape +from it. + +You are happy; accept the fact. + +Don’t cling to it, and don’t try not to become unhappy; don’t try anything. If unhappiness +comes, allow it. If happiness comes, allow it. Just remain a watcher on the hill, just +seeing things. The morning comes, and then evening comes, and then the sun rises, and +then the sun sets and there are stars and darkness, and again the sun rises — and you are +just a watcher on the hill. You cannot do anything. You simply see. The morning has +come; you note the fact, and you know that now the evening will come because the +evening follows the morning. And when the evening comes you note the fact, and you +know that now the morning will be coming because the morning follows the evening. +When pain is there, you are just a watcher. You kn ow that pain has come, and sooner or +later it will go, and the polar opposite will come. And when happiness has come, you +know that it is not going to remain always. Unhappiness will be just hidden somewhere, +it will be coming. You remain a watcher. If you can watch without attraction and without +repulsion you will fall in the middle, and once the pendulum stops in the middle you can +look for the first time at what the world is. + +While you are moving, you cannot know what the world is; your movement confuses +everything. Once you are not moving, you can look at the world. For the first time you +know what reality is. A non-moving mind knows what reality is; a moving mind cannot +know what reality is. + +Your mind is just like a camera: you go on moving and taking shots, but whatsoever +comes is just a confusion because the camera must not move. If the camera is moving, the +pictures are going to be just a confusion. + +Your consciousness is moving from one pendulum to another, and whatsoever you kn ow +of reality is just a confusion, a nightmare. You don’t know what is what; everything is +confused, missed. If you remain in the middle and the pendulum has stopped, if your +consciousness is focused now, centered, then you know what reality is. Only a mind that +is unmoving can know what the truth is. "OH BELOVED, PUT ATTENTION NEITHER +ON PLEASURE NOR ON PAIN, BUT BETWEEN THESE." + +The fourth technique: + +"OBJECTS AND DESIRES EXIST IN ME AS IN OTHERS. SO ACCEPTING, LET +THEM BE TRANSFORMED." + +This technique can be very helpful. When you are angry, you always justify your anger, +but when someone else gets angry you always criticize. Your madness is natural, but +others’ madness is just "perversion." Whatsoever you do is good — or even if it was not +good, it was "necessary to do." You always find some rationalization for it. + +The same is done by others, but then the same rationalization is not given. If you are +angry, you say it was necessary to help the other. If you were not angry, the other would +have been destroyed., he would have got a wrong habit, so it was good to give him + + + +punishment. + + +It was just for his "good". But when someone gets angry at you, the same rationalization +is not applicable. Then he is "mad," he is "evil." + +We have double standards — one standard for one oneself and another standard for +everyone else. This double-standard mind is going to be in deep misery always. This +mind is not just, and unless your mind is just you cannot have a glimpse of the truth. + +Only a just mind can leave this double standard. + +Jesus says, "Don’t do to others what you would not like done to you." This means a +similar standard is needed. This technique is based on the idea of a single standard: +"OBJECTS AND DESIRES EXIST IN ME AS IN OTHERS...." You are not exceptional, +although everyone thinks he is exceptional. If you think you are exceptional, know well +this is how every ordinary mind thinks. To know that one is ordinary is the most +extraordinary thing in this world. + +Someone asked Suzuki about his teacher: "What was exceptional in your teacher, +Suzuki?" Suzuki was a Zen master, so he said, "The only thing I will never forget is this, +that I have never seen a man who thought himself so ordinary. He was just ordinary, and +that is the most extraordinary thing, because every ordinary mind thinks he is +exceptional, extraordinary." + +But no one is extraordinary, and if you know this you become extraordinary. Everyone is +just like everyone else. + +The same desires that hover around you hover around everyone else. But you call your +sex love; others' love you call sex. Whatsoever you do, you protect it. You say it is good. +That is why you are doing it, and the same thing done by others is "not the same." And +this happens not only to persons; it happens to races, nations. This is why the whole +world has become a mess, because of this. + +If India goes on strengthening its anny it is "for defense," and if China goes on +strengthening its army it is "for attack." Every government in the world calls its military +organization "defense." Then who attacks? If everyone is defending, who is the +aggressor? If you move into history, you cannot find anyone who is an aggressor. Of +course, the defeated ones prove to be aggressors. The defeated ones always prove to be +aggressors because they cannot write history. The victorious ones write history. + +If Hitler could have won, then the history would have been different. Then he would have +been the savior of the world, not the aggressor. Then Churchill and Roosevelt and the +other allies would have been the aggressors, and it would have been good if they were +destroyed. But because Hitler couldn’t win he was the aggressor, and Churchill and +Roosevelt and Stalin and the other allies saved humanity. Not only with persons, but with +everything we do — as nations, as races — the same logic moves. + +We are something different and the other is different. + +No one is different! A religious mind knows that everyone is the same, so if you give +rationalizations for yourself, please give the same rationalizations to others also. If you +criticize others, then apply that same criticism to yourself. Don’t create two standards. + +One standard will transform your being totally because with one standard you become +just and for the first time you can look straight into reality, as it is. "OBJECTS AND +DESIRES EXIST IN ME AS IN OTHERS. SO ACCEPTING, LET THEM BE +TRANSFORMED": ACCEPT THEM AND THEY WILL BE TRANSFORMED." + + + +What are we doing? We accept that they exist in others. Whatsoever is wrong exists in +others; whatsoever is right exists in you. Then how can you be transformed? You are +already transformed. You think that you are already good and everyone else is bad; the +world needs a transformation, not you. That is why there are always leaders, movements, +prophets. They go on crying from the rooftops to change the world, to create a revolution, +and we have been making revolutions and revolutions and nothing changes. + +Man remains the same and the earth remains in the same misery. Only faces and labels +change, but misery continues. It is not a question of how to change the world. The world +is not wrong; you are wrong. The question is how to change yourself: "How to change +myself?" is the religious quest. + +"How to change everyone else?" is political. But the politician thinks he is okay; really, +he is the model of how the whole world should be. He is the model, he is the ideal, and it +is up to him to change the whole. + +Whatsoever the religious man sees in everyone else he sees in himself also. If there is +violence, he immediately wonders whether the violence exists in him or not. If there is +greed, if he sees greed somewhere, his first reflection is over whether the same greed is in +him or not. And the more he searches the more he finds that he is the source of all evil. +Then it is not a question of how to change the world; it is a question of how to change +oneself. And the change starts the moment you accept one standard. Then you are already +changing. + +Don't condemn others. I don't mean condemn yourself — no! Just don’t condemn others. +And if you are not condemning others, you will have a deep compassion for them, +because the same problems are there. If someone commits a sin, a sin in the eyes of the +society, you start condemning him, never thinking that you also have the seed to commit +that sin within you. If someone commits a murder you condemn him, but have you not +always been thinking to kill someone, to murder? Is not the potential seed there always? +The man who has committed murder was not a murderer a moment before, but the seed +was there. And the seed is with you also. + +A moment later, who knows? You may be a murderer. So don't condemn him. Rather, +accept. Then you will feel a deep compassion for him because whatsoever he has done +any man is capable of doing; you are capable of doing it. + +A non-condemning mind will have compassion; a non-condemning mind will have a +deep acceptance. He knows that this is how humanity is and that "this is how I am." Then +the whole world will become just a reflection of your own self. It will become a mirror. +Then every face becomes a mirror for you; you look at yourself in every face. + +"OBJECTS AND DESIRES EXIST IN ME AS IN OTHERS. SO ACCEPTING, LET +THEM BE TRANSFORMED." Acceptance becomes transfonnation. This is difficult to +understand because we always reject, and then too we cannot transform anything. You +have greed, but you reject it. No one wants to think of himself as greedy. You are sexual, +but you reject it. No one wants to feel oneself as sexual. You are angry, you have anger, +but you reject it. You create a facade, and you try to justify it. You never feel that you are +angry or that you are anger. + +But rejection never transforms anything. It simply suppresses, and that which is +suppressed becomes more powerful. It moves to your roots, to your unconscious deep +down within you, and it begins functioning from there. And from that darkness of the +unconscious it becomes more powerful. + + + +You cannot accept it now because you are not even conscious of it. Acceptance brings +everything up. There is no need to suppress. + +You know you are greedy, you know you have anger, you know you are sexual, and you +accept them as natural facts without any condemnation. There is no need to suppress +them. They come to the surface of the mind, and from the surface of the mind they can be +thrown very easily. From the deep center they cannot be thrown. And when they are on +the surface you are always aware of them, but when they are in the unconscious you +become unaware. And a disease of which you are aware can be cured; a disease of which +you are unaware cannot be cured. + +Bring everything up to the surface. Accept your humanity, your animality. Whatsoever is +there, accept it without any condemnation. It is there, and be aware of it. Greed is there; +don’t try to make it non-greed. You cannot. And if you try to make it non-greed, you will +simply suppress it. Your non-greed will simply be another form of greed and nothing +else. Don’t try to change it into the other; you cannot change it. If you want to try to +change greed, what will you do? And a greedy mind can be attracted only towards the +ideal of non-greed if some further greed is possible through it. + +If someone says that "If you leave all your riches you will be allowed in my Kingdom of +God," then you can even renounce. + +A further greed becomes possible. This is a bargain. Greed has not to become non-greed; +greed is to be transcended. You cannot change it. + +How can a violent mind become non-violent? If you force yourself to be non-violent, this +will be a violence to yourself. You cannot change one into another, you can simply be +aware and accepting. Accept greed as it is. By acceptance is not meant that there is no +need to transform it. By acceptance is meant only that you accept the fact, the natural +fact, as it is. Then move in life knowing well that greed is there. Do whatsoever you are +doing, remembering well that greed is there. This awareness will transform you. It +transforms because knowingly you cannot be greedy, knowingly you cannot be angry. + +For anger, for greed, for violence, unawareness is a basic requirement, just as you cannot +knowingly take poison, just as knowingly you cannot put your hand into a flame. +Unknowingly you can put it. If you don’t know what a flame is, what fire is, you can put +your hand in it. But if you know that fire bums, you cannot put your hand in it. + +The more your "knowingness" grows, the more greed becomes a fire and anger becomes +poison. They simply become impossible. Without any suppression, they disappear. And +when greed disappears without any ideal of non-greed, it has a beauty of its own. When +violence disappears without making you non-violent, it has a beauty of its own. + + +Otherwise a non-violent man is deeply violent. That violence is there hidden, and you can +have a glimpse of it from his non-violence also. He will force his non-violence upon +himself and upon others in a very violent way. That violence has become subtle. + +This sutra says that acceptance is transfonnation, because through acceptance awareness +becomes possible. + + +THE END. + + + +Chapter 38: Toward the authentic being + + +The first question: + +Question 1 + +"IN WHICH WAY DOES THE MODERNIZED ORIGINAL MIND BECOME +IDENTIFIED WITH THE DUST OF THE PAST KNOWLEDGE AND +EXPERIENCE?" + +Mind is pure, and no impurity can enter it. That is impossible. The mind is just the +buddha-nature — the ultimate. And when I say "mind," I don't mean your mind, I simply +mean the mind where no I and you exist. You are the impurity. Just behind you is the +original mind. You are the dust. So first try to analyze what you are, and then you will be +able to understand how the original mind becomes identified with the past, with +memories, with dust. + +What are you? Right now, if I ask you what you are, you can answer in two ways. One +will be a verbal answer, and in that verbal answer you will relate your past. You will say, +"My name is this. I belong to this family or that, to this religion or that, to this country or +that. I am educated or uneducated, rich or poor." These are all past experiences, they are +not you. You have been through them, you have passed through them, they have been the +passage, but your past goes on accumulating. + +This will be the verbal answer, but this is not the real answer. This is your mind arguing, +the false ego. Right now, if you leave all of your past — if you forget your father, your +parents, your family, your religion, your country, all which is accidental — if you forget +all that is accidental and just remain with yourself here and now, then who are you? No +name will come to your consciousness, no form — just a simple awareness that you are. + +You won't be able to say who you are. You will simply say, "I am." The moment you +answer the "who," you move into the past. + +You are a simple consciousness, a pure mind, an innocent mirror. Right now, this very +moment, you are. Who are you? Just a simple awareness that "I am." Even the "I" is not +needed. The deeper you move, the more you will feel just "am-ness," existence. This +existence is the pure mind, but this existence has no form; this is formless — NIRAKAR. +This existence has no name; it is nameless — ANAM. + +It will be difficult for you to be introduced by this which you really are. In the society, +relating with others, you will need some name, some form. Your past supplies you name +and form. That name and form are useful. Without them it will be difficult to survive. +They are needed, but they are not you; they are just labels. Because of this utilitarian +need, the original mind becomes identified with name and form. + +A child is bom. He is a simple consciousness, but you have to call him, you have to give +him a name. In the beginning, the child will use his own name. He will not say, "I am +feeling hungry"; he will say, "Ram is feeling hungry." "Ram "is his name. He will say, +"Ram is feeling very angry." Only later on will he leam that this cannot be used in this +way; he cannot call himself "Ram". Ram is the name that he is to be called by others. + +Then he will leam the use of "I." + +First he will become identified with "Ram," the name that others call him; then he will +become identified with "I." This is utilitarian. You need it. Without it survival will be +difficult. Because of this utilitarian necessity, one becomes identified. You can go + + + +beyond this identification, and the moment you start going beyond and reclaiming your +original consciousness, you have started meditation, and you can start meditation only +when you become frustrated with your name and form and the world that belongs to it. +Religion starts when you become frustrated, totally frustrated, with the world of name +and form and when the whole thing looks meaningless. It is! Ultimately it IS +meaningless. This feeling of meaninglessness of the world that is created around name +and form makes you uneasy. That uneasiness is the beginning of a religious search. You +become uneasy because with this label you cannot become totally identified. The label +remains a label; you remain what you are. This label covers you a little, but it cannot +become your totality. And sooner or later you become fed up with this label. You want to +know who you really are. And the moment you ask sincerely, "Who am I?" you are on a +different journey; you are transcending. + +This identification is natural. There is another reason why it is so easy to become +identified. + +This is a room. If I say to you, "Look at the room," where will you look? You will look at +the walls. The walls are not the room: the room is just "roominess"; it is not the walls, the +walls are just the boundaries of the space that we call "room." But if I tell you to look at +the room, you will look at the walls because the "roominess" cannot be looked at. + +You are just inner space; your name and form are the walls. They give you a boundary, +they give you a definition, they give you a definite place. You can be identified with that +definiteness; otherwise you are just a zero, SHUNYA — a nothingness. That nothingness +is there, that inner space is there. + +Look at it in this way. You breathe in, you breathe out. If you breathe in and breathe out +silently and there is no thinking in the mind, if you are simply sitting under a tree +breathing in and breathing out, what will you feel? You will feel that there is outer space, +there is inner space. The breath comes into the inner space, the breath moves out to the +outer space, but where are you? There are simply two spaces. Your throat is just a door, a +swinging door. When the breath comes in, the breath forces the door and moves in. When +the breath goes out, it again forces the door and goes out. Your throat is just a swinging +door, and there are two spaces — the outer and the inner. And if this door is broken, then +there are not even two spaces — just one space. + + +You will become afraid if you feel a nothingness within. You want to be something +definable, definite. There is no one who is definite inside; the outer space is infinite and +the inner space is also infinite. That is why Buddha insisted that there is no soul, no +ATMAN. You are just a vacant space — infinite. + +It is difficult to feel oneself as this infinite space unless you make an arduous effort. One +becomes identified with the boundaries. It is easier to feel oneself that way — with the +boundaries. Your name is just a boundary, your body is just a boundary, your thoughts +are just a boundary. For outer utility, for your own convenience also, you become +identified. Then, once you become identified, accumulation goes on and on and on, and +with accumulation you feel a fulfillment of the ego. You are identified with your riches, +then you go on accumulating. You have a feeling you are growing greater, bigger. You +have a big house, then a bigger house, then a still bigger house, so you feel that you are +getting bigger and bigger, and that is how greed is born. + +Greed is nothing but an expansion, an effort to expand the ego. But howsoever great you + + + +become in your ego, you can never become infinite, and you ARE infinite within. If you +can look into the nothingness you are infinite within. That is why ego is never satisfied. +Ultimately it is frustrating. It cannot become infinite; it will remain finite. + + +This is how one always has a spiritual discontent. You are infinite. Nothing less will be +helpful for you and nothing less will ever satisfy you. But every boundary is going to be +finite. It is needed, it is necessary in a way, useful, but it is not true, it is not the truth. + +This inner mirror, this inner mind, is pure consciousness — just consciousness. + +Just look at the light. You say the room is filled with light, but how do you see the light? +You have never seen light itself, you cannot see it; you always see something lighted. +Light falls on the walls, light falls on the books, light falls on other persons. It is reflected +on those objects. Because you can see objects, you say light is there. When you cannot +see objects, you say there is darkness. You have never seen light pure in itself. It is +always seen reflected on some object. + +Consciousness is even purer than light. It is the purest possibility in existence. If you +become totally silent, all boundaries disappear and you will not be able to say who you +are. You simply are, because there is no object you can feel yourself to be in contrast +with. You cannot say that you are a subject, soul, or even a consciousness. Because of +this purity of consciousness, you always know yourself through something else; you +cannot know yourself directly. So when you create boundaries, you feel that you know +yourself. + +With a name you feel you know yourself; with your riches you feel you know yourself. +Something around you becomes the boundary and the pure consciousness is reflected +back. + +When Buddha attained enlightenment he said, "I am no more." When you attain to that +state you will also say, "I am no more," because without a boundary how can you be? +When Shankara attained, he said, "I am all." Both mean the same. If you are the "all," +you are no more. All or nothing — only two possibilities are there, but in both the +possibilities you are not. If you are all, the BRAHMAN, then you are not. If you are not, +totally a nothingness, then too you are not. Because of this, it is a necessary part of life to +become identified. And it is good, because unless you become identified you cannot +become unidentified. Unless you become identified, you cannot become unidentified! At +least once, one has to become identified. + +It is like this: if you are bom healthy and have never been ill, you will never be aware of +your health. You cannot be, because awareness of health needs a background of disease +and illness. You will have to fall ill to know that you were healthy or what health is. The +other pole will be needed. Eastern esoteric science says this is why the world is, so that +you can experience that you are divine. The world gives a contrast. + +Go into a school, and you will see that the teacher is writing on a blackboard with white +chalk. + +He can write on a white board too, but then it will be meaningless because it will be +invisible, it won't be seen. Only on a blackboard can one write with white chalk so that it +is seen. The blackboard is a necessity for the white writing to become visible. + +The world is just a blackboard, and you become visible because of it. This is an inherent +polarity, and it is good. That is why in the East we have never said that the world is bad; + + + +we take it just as a school, a training. It is good because only in contrast will you be able +to know your purity. When you come into the world you become identified. With +identification you enter; the world starts. So you will have to fall ill to know your inner +health. + +This has been a basic question all over the world: Why is this world there? Why is it at +all? Many answers have been given, but those answers are just superfluous. Only this +attitude seems to be very deep and meaningful — that the world is just a background; +without it you cannot become aware of your inner consciousness. + +I will tell you one story. One man — very rich, the richest in his country — became +disturbed, became frustrated. He felt that life was meaningless. He had everything that +could be purchased, but all that could be purchased proved meaningless. Only something +that could not be purchased could have real meaning. He had everything he could +purchase — he could have purchased the whole world — but what to do now? He was +frustrated and deep discontent was within. + +So he gathered all his valuables, ornaments, gold, jewels, everything, into a big bag, and +he started on a journey just to find a man who could give him something valuable, a +glimpse of happiness. Then be would present his whole life's earnings to him. He went +from one teacher to another, traveled and traveled, but no one was able to give him even +a glimpse. And he was ready to give everything — his whole kingdom. + +Then he reached a village and asked for Mulla Nasruddin, who was a fakir living there. A +village man told him, "Mulla Nasruddin is just sitting outside the town, meditating under +a tree. You go there, and if he cannot give you a glimpse of happiness then forget it. Then +you can go to all the comers of the world, but you will never get it. If this man cannot +give you a glimpse, then there is no possibility." + +So the man was very excited. He came to Nasruddin who was sitting under a tree. The +sun was setting. The man said, "I have come for this purpose. My whole life's earnings +are here in this bag, and I will give them to you if you can give me a glimpse of +happiness. + +" Mulla Nasruddin listened. The evening was descending; it was becoming dark. Without +answering him, Mulla Nasruddin snatched the bag from the rich man and ran away. Of +course, the rich man followed him crying, weeping and screaming. The village streets +were known to Mulla Nasruddin; they were not known to the rich man as he was a +stranger, so he couldn't find him. + +From all over the village people from the whole village started following them. + +Nasruddin was just running round and round. The man was mad. He was crying, "I have +been robbed of all my life's riches. I am a poor man! I have become a beggar!" He was +weeping — weeping like anything. + +Then Nasruddin reached the same tree, and he just put the bag before the tree and went +behind the tree to hide there. The man came there, he fell on the bag, and started weeping +in happiness. Nasrudin looked from behind the tree and said, "Are you happy, man? Have +you had a little glimpse? + +" The man said, "I am as happy as anyone can be on this earth." + +What happened? To have a peak, a valley is needed. To feel happiness, unhappiness is +needed. To know the divine, the world is needed. The world is just a valley. The man was +the same, the bag was the same. Nothing new had happened, but now he said that he was +happy — as happy as anyone can be on this earth — and just a few minutes before he was + + + +miserable. Nothing had changed. The man was the same, the bag was the same, the tree +was the same. Nothing had changed, but the man was now happy, dancing. The contrast +had happened. Consciousness becomes identified because through identification the +world is and through the world you can regain yourself + +When Buddha attained he was asked, "What have you achieved?" He said, "Nothing. + +On the contrary, I have lost much. I have not attained anything because now I know that +whatsoever I have attained was always there; it was my nature. It was never taken away +from me, so I have not achieved anything. I have achieved that which was already there, +which was already achieved. I have lost only my ignorance." + +Identification is ignorance. It is part of this great play — this cosmic LEELA, this cosmic +play — that you will have to lose yourself to find yourself again. This losing yourself is +just a way, and the only way, to regain yourself. If you have lost too much already, you +can regain. If you have not yet lost yourself enough, you will have to lose more. And +nothing can be done before that; no help is possible before that. Unless you are lost +completely in the valley, in the darkness, in the SANSARA, in the world, nothing can be +done. Lose so that you can gain. This looks paradoxical, but this is how the world is, how +the very process is. + +The second question: + +Question 2 + +IF ONE BEGINS TO FEEL THAT LIFE IS A PSYCHODRAMA, THEN ONE ALSO +FEELS DETACHED AND LONELY. THUS, THE INTENSITY, SINCERITY AND +DEPTH OF LIVING IS LOST. PLEASE SUGGEST WHAT TO DO IN THIS +SITUATION. WHAT THEN IS THE RIGHT ATTITUDE TOWARD LIFE?" + +"If one begins to feel that life is a psychodrama, then one also feels detached and +lonely...." Then feel it! Why create a problem? If you feel detached and lonely, then feel +it! But we go on creating problems. + +Whatsoever happens, we will create a problem out of it. Feel lonely and detached — And +if you can be at ease with your loneliness, it will disappear. If you start doing something +with it to transcend it, it will never disappear; it will remain there. Now a modern trend in +psychology and psychoanalysis says that anything can disappear if you remain with it +without creating any problems, and this has been one of the oldest teachings of tantra. + +For the last ten or twelve years, in Japan, a small psychotherapeutic technique has been in +use. Western psychoanalysts and psychiatrists have been studying it. It is a Zen therapy, +and it is wonderful. If someone goes neurotic or psychotic, that man or woman is simply +put into a lonely room and he or she is told, "Remain with yourself, whatsoever you are. +Neurotic? Okay! Then be neurotic and live with it." And the doctors do not interfere. + +Food is provided, needs will he fulfilled, attention will be given, but there is no +interference. The patient has to live with himself, and within ten days he starts changing. +Western psychoanalysis works for years, and basically nothing changes. + +What happens to this Zen patient? There is no interference from outside. There is just +acceptance of the fact that "Okay, you are neurotic. Nothing can be done." Zen says that +one tree is small and another tree is very big, so okay: one is small, another is big, and +nothing can be done. + + +Once you accept a thing, you are already transcending it. + +One of the most original psychiatrists of England, R. D. Laing, has now proposed that if + + + +we can leave a madman to himself, just paying loving attention to him, fulfilling his +needs and not interfering with him, he will get over his madness within three or four +weeks. His proposal is that no madness can last for more than ten days if it is not +interfered with. If you interfere, then you prolong the process. + +What happens when you are not interfering in anything? You feel lonely, so feel lonely: +it is how you are. But when you feel lonely you start doing something, and then you are +divided. Then one part of you feels lonely and another part tries to change it. This is +absurd. It is just pulling yourself up by your legs or the strings of your shoes — pulling +yourself up to the sky. Absurd! You are lonely, so what can you do? There is no one else +to do anything. You are alone, so be lonely. This is your fate; this is how you are. What +will happen if you accept it? If you accept it, your fragmentariness will disappear, you +will become one, you will be whole — not divided. + +If you are depressed, so be depressed; don’t do anything. And what can you do? +Whatsoever you do will be done out of depression, so it will create more confusion. You +can pray to God, but you will pray so depressingly that you will even make God +depressed through your prayers. + +Don’t do that violence. Your prayer is going to be a depressed prayer. + +You can meditate, but what will you do? The depression will be there. Because you are +depressed, whatsoever you do the depression will follow. More confusion will be created, +more frustration, because you cannot succeed. And when you cannot succeed you will +feel more depressed, and this can go on ad infinitum. It is better to remain with the first +depression than to create a second circle and then a third circle. Remain with the first; the +original is beautiful. The second will be false, and the third will be a far-off echo. Don’t +create these. The first is beautiful. You are depressed, so this is how existence is +happening to you at this moment. + +You are depressed, so remain with it. Wait and watch. You cannot be depressed for long +because in this world nothing is pennanent. This world is a flux. This world cannot +change its basic law for you so that you remain depressed forever. Nothing is here +forever; everything is moving and changing. Existence is a river; it cannot stop for you, +just for you, so that you remain depressed forever. It is moving, it has already moved. If +you look at your depression, you will feel that even your depression is not the same the +next moment; it is different, it is changing. Just watch, remain with it and don't do +anything. This is how transformation happens through non-doing. + +This is what is meant by "effortless effort." + +Feel depression, taste it deeply, live it. It is your fate. Then suddenly you will feel it has +disappeared because the man who can accept even depression cannot be depressed. A +man, a mind, who can accept even depression cannot remain depressed! Depression +needs a non-accepting mind. "This is not good, that is not good; this should not be, that +should not be; this must not be like this. "Everything is denied, rejected — not accepted. +"No" is basic. Even happiness will be rejected by such a mind. Such a mind will find +something to reject in happiness also. + +One man came to me just the other day and he said, "Meditation is going deep and I am +feeling very happy, but I am suspicious. This happiness must be illusory because I have +never felt any happiness before. I must be in a delusion; so much doubt has come to me. +Now, please clarify my doubt." Even if happiness happens to a mind who has been +always rejecting, he will feel a doubt about it. He will feel that something has gone + + + +wrong. He is happy, so he will feel something has gone wrong. Just by meditating for a +few days this is not possible. + +A non-accepting mind will "non-accepf ' anything, but if you can accept your loneliness, +your depression, your sadness, you are transcending already. Acceptance is +transcendence. You have taken the very ground away, and then the depression cannot +stand there. + + +Try this: Whatsoever your state of mind, accept it and wait for when the state changes +itself. You are not changing it; you can feel the beauty that comes when states change by +themselves. You can know that it is just like the sun rising in the morning and then +setting in the evening. Then again it will rise and again it will set, and it will go on. You +need not do anything about it. If you can feel your states of mind changing by +themselves, you can remain indifferent, you can remain away, miles away, as if the mind +is going somewhere else. The sun is rising, setting; the depression is coming, the +happiness is coming, going: but you are not in it. It goes and comes by itself; the states +come and move. + +"IF ONE BEGINS TO FEEL THAT LIFE IS A PSYCHODRAMA, THEN ONE ALSO +FEELS DEPRESSED AND LONELY." So feel it! "THUS, THE INTENSITY, +SINCERITY AND DEPTH OF LIVING IS LOST." Let it be lost, because the sincerity +and depth that can be lost was not real. It was pseudo, false, and it is better that the false +thing is lost. How can a real depth be lost? The very definition of a "real depth" is that it +cannot be lost, no matter what you do. If you can disturb a buddha, then he is not a +buddha. Whatsoever you do, he remains undisturbed. That unconditional undisturbance is +the buddha -nature. The real cannot be lost. The real is always unconditional. + +If I love you and I say, "Don’t be angry; otherwise my love will be lost," then the sooner +such a love is lost, the better. + +If the love is real, whatsoever you do makes no difference; the love will remain. And +only then does it have any worth. + +So if just by looking at the world as a psychodrama, as a drama, your intensity, your +depth of living is lost, then it is not worth preserving. It was false. Why is it lost? + +Because it was really an act in a drama, and you were thinking that it was real so you felt +it was deeper. Now you know it was just a drama. If it was just a drama and the sincerity +is lost, the sincerity was false. You were thinking it was real, and it was not real. Just by +looking at life as a drama, it disappeared. + +It is just as if a rope was there lying in a dark room and you felt that it was a snake, but +there was no snake. Now you come with a lamp, and with the lamp the snake is lost and +only the rope remains. If with the lamp the snake is lost, then it was never there. + +If you look at life as a drama, that which is false will be lost and that which is real will, +for the first time, appear in you. Wait! Let the false be lost, and wait! There will be a gap, +an interval, before the false disappears and the real comes. There will be a gap. When +false shadows will have disappeared completely and your eyes will not be filled by them, +and your eyes will have become detached from the false shadows, you will be able to +look at the real that was always there. But one has to wait. + + +’PLEASE SUGGEST WHAT TO DO IN THIS SITUATION." Nothing! Please don’t do + + + +anything. You have created a mess because of too much of your doing. You are such a +good doer, you have confused everything around you — not only for yourself, but for +others also. Be a non-doer; that will be compassion towards yourself. Be compassionate. +Don’t do anything, because with a false mind, a confused mind, everything becomes more +confused. With a confused mind, it is better to wait and not to do anything so that the +confusion disappears. It will disappear; nothing is pennanent in this world. You need +only a deep patience. Don’t be in a hurry. + +I will tell you one story. Buddha was traveling through a forest. The day was hot — it was +just midday — he felt thirsty, so he said to his disciple Ananda, "Go back. We crossed a +little stream. You go back and bring, fetch, some water for me." + +Ananda went back, but the stream was very small and some carts were passing through it. +The water was disturbed and had become dirty. All the dirt that had settled in it had come +up, and the water was not drinkable now. So Ananda thought, "I shall have to go back." +He came back and he said to Buddha, "That water has become absolutely dirty and it is +not drinkable. Allow me to go ahead. I know there is a river just a few miles away from +here. I will go and fetch water from there." + +Buddha said, "No! You go back to the same stream." + +As Buddha had said this Ananda had to follow it, but he followed it with half a heart as +he knew that the water would not be brought. And time was being unnecessarily wasted +and he was feeling thirsty, but when Buddha said it he had to go. + +Again he came back and he said, "Why did you insist? That water is not drinkable." +Buddha said, "You go again." And as Buddha said it, Ananda had to follow. + +The third time he reached the stream, the water was as clear as it had ever been. The dust +had flowed away, the dead leaves had gone, and the water was pure again. Then Ananda +laughed. He brought the water and he came dancing. He fell at Buddha's feet and he said, +"Your ways of teaching are miraculous. You have taught me a great lesson — that just +patience is needed and nothing is pennanent." + +And this is Buddha’s basic teaching: nothing is pennanent, everything is fleeting — so +why be so worried? Go back to the same stream. By now everything should have +changed. Nothing remains the same. Just be patient: go again and again and again. Just a +few moments, and the leaves will have gone and the dirt will have settled again and the +water will be pure again. + +Ananda also asked Buddha, when he was going back for the second time, "You insist that +I go, but can I do something to make that water pure?" + +Buddha said, "Please don't do anything; otherwise you will make it more impure. + +And don’t enter the stream. Just be outside, wait on the bank. Your entering the stream +will create a mess. The stream flows by itself, so allow it to flow." + +Nothing is permanent; life is a flux. Heraclitus has said that you cannot step twice in the +same river. It is impossible to step twice in the same river because the river has flowed +on; everything has changed. And not only has the river flowed on, you have also flowed +on. You are also different; you are also a river flowing. + +See this impermanency of everything. Don't be in a hurry; don’t try to do anything. Just +wait! Wait in a total non-doing. And if you can wait, the transformation will be there. + +This very waiting is a transformation. + +The third question: + +Question 3 + + + +"THE PRACTICE OF WITNESSING MAKES ME QUIET, STILL, AND SILENT, + +BUT THEN THE FRIENDS AROUND ME SAY THAT I HAVE BECOME SERIOUS. +THERE SEEMS TO BE SOME SUBSTANCE IN WHAT THEY SAY. PLEASE +EXPLAIN HOW ONE CAN GROW SIMULTANEOUSLY IN STILLNESS AND +PLAYFULNESS." + +If you have really become silent, you will not pay attention to what others are saying. If +others' opinions are still important, you are not silent. Really, you are waiting for them to +say something or for them to approve and appreciate that you have become silent. Your +silence needs their approval? You need them to certify it? Then you are not confident that +you have become silent. + + +Others' opinions are meaningful only because you don’t know anything. Opinion is never +knowledge. You go on gathering others' opinions because you don’t know what you are, +who you are, what is happening to you. You have to ask others, "What is happening to +me?" You have to ask others? If you are really silent, quiet, still, then there are no friends +and no opinion is meaningful. Then you can laugh. Let them say whatsoever they say. + +But you become affected. Whatsoever they say goes deep in you; you become disturbed. +Your silence is false, forced, cultivated. It is not a spontaneous flowering within you. + +You may have forced yourself to be silent, but you were boiling within. Then the silence +is just on the surface. If someone says you are not silent, or if someone says this is not +good, or if someone says this is false, then you are disturbed and the silence is gone. The +silence is gone, that is why you are asking me this. "THERE SEEMS TO BE SOME +SUBSTANCE IN WHAT THEY SAY." You have become serious. So what is wrong in +being serious? If you are born serious, to be serious, you will be serious. You cannot +force playfulness; otherwise your playfulness will be serious, and you will destroy the +whole play. There are serious players. They get so serious in their games and plays that it +becomes even more anxiety-creating. + +I was reading the memoirs of someone who was a great industrialist, much worried with +day-to-day problems. + +Someone suggested golf: "Play golf. That will be anxiety-reducing." He started playing +golf, but he was the same man. He became so excited about his golf that he couldn’t +sleep, he was playing the whole night. The industry was a burden, and now golf became a +second burden — and a stronger one. He played golf, but with a serious mind, the same +mind. + +If you are serious, you are serious. Nothing can he done about it. Be serious and remain +serious. Then you have already started being playful; then you are playful about your +seriousness, not serious about it. You take it as a play, so you say, "Okay, God has given +me this role, so I will be a serious man and I will play my seriousness." Then it will have +disappeared deep down. Do you understand me? + +You can create seriousness out of your playfulness or you can create playfulness out of +your seriousness. If you are a sad one, a serious one, tell everyone, "I am bom serious +and I am going to remain so" — and don’t get serious about it. Be! Simply be, and then +you can laugh about it and it will disappear. And you will not even become aware of +when it has disappeared. + +And don’t pay attention to what others say. This is a disease. They will drive you crazy — +the others. Who are these others and why are you so much interested in them? They drive + + + +you crazy and you drive them crazy because you are the other to them. + + +Why pay so much importance to others' opinions? Pay attention to your own experiences +and remain true to your own experiences. If you feel good in being serious, it is okay! If +you feel you have become quiet and silent and still through your practice of witnessing, +why be interested and why be disturbed by what others say? + +But we are not confident, so we must gather others' opinions. We must go on a signature +campaign: "You think I have become a buddha, so please sign." When everyone signs it +and you have gathered many signatures, at least the majority, you think you are a buddha +This is not the way to be an enlightened one. + +"AND PLEASE EXPLAIN HOW ONE CAN GROW SIMULTANEOUSLY IN +STILLNESS AND PLAYFULNESS." One grows! There has never been any case that is +otherwise. One grows simultaneously in stillness and playfulness, but if your stillness is +false then the problem arises. All those who have known silence have always been +playful, non-serious. They could laugh, and they could laugh not only at others, they +could laugh at themselves. + +Bodhidharma entered China fourteen hundred years ago, from India. He put one of his +shoes on his head; one was on one of his feet and one was on his head. The Emperor of +China, Wu, had come to welcome him. He became disturbed. There were many, many +rumors, of course, that this man was strange, but he was an enlightened one and the +emperor wanted to welcome him to his Kingdom. + +He became disturbed. His courtiers, they also became disturbed. What type of man was +this? And he was laughing. + +It was not good to say anything before others, so when everyone had gone and +Bodhidharma and the emperor retired into Bodhidharma’s room, the emperor asked, +"Please tell me, why are you making such a fool of yourself? Why are you carrying one +shoe on your head?" + +Bodhidharma laughed and said, "Because I can laugh at myself, and it is good to show +you my reality. I am such a man, and I don't pay more importance to my head than I pay +to my feet; both are the same to me. Higher and lower have disappeared. And, moreover, +I want to tell you that I don't pay any significance to what others say about me. This is +good. The first moment that I entered, I wanted you to know what type of man I am." +This Bodhidhanna was a rare jewel; very few have existed who can be compared to him. +What was he showing? He is simply showing that on this path of spirituality you are to +go alone as an individual. Society becomes irrelevant. + +Someone had come to do an interview with George Gurdjieff. The man who came was a +big journalist. Gurdjieff s disciples were very much excited because now the story was +going to be in a big newspaper, and their master's photo and their master's news was +going to be published. They cared very much; they paid much attention to the journalist. + +They virtually forgot their master, and they hung around the journalist. Then the +interview began, but really, it never began. When the journalist asked some questions to +Gurdjieff, Gurdjieff said, "Wait a minute." + +Just by his side was sitting a lady. Gurdjieff asked, "What day is today?" The lady said, +"Sunday." Gurdjieff said, "How is that possible? Just the day before it was Saturday, so +how can it be Sunday today? Just the other day you said it is Saturday, and now it is +Sunday. How, after Saturday, can Sunday come?" + + + +The journalist stood up. He said, "I am going. This man seems to be mad." All the +disciples just couldn't understand what had happened. When the journalist had left, +Gurdjieff was laughing. What others say is not relevant. Be authentic to what you feel, +but be authentic! If real silence happens to you, you will be able to laugh. + +It is said about Do-zen, one Zen master, that when he attained enlightenment many +people asked, "What did you do after that?" He said, "I ordered a cup of tea." What is +there to do next? Everything is finished. And Do-zen was serious about his playfulness, +playful about his seriousness. Really, what remains? + +Don't pay much attention to what others say and remember only one thing: don’t force +and cultivate stillness. A cultivated stillness will be serious, ill, tense. But how can a real +silence come to you? Try to understand this. + +You are tense, you are unhappy, you are depressed, angry, greedy, violent. A thousand +diseases are there. Still, you can practice silence. These diseases will be within you, and +you can create a layer of silence. You can do transcendental meditation; you can use a +mantra. The mantra is not going to change your violence, neither is it going to change +your greed. It is not going to change anything deep. The mantra can just give a +tranquilizing effect. Just on the periphery, you will feel more silent. This is just a +tranquilizer, a sound tranquilizer, and tranquilizing is possible through many ways — +many ways. When you repeat a mantra continuously, you become sleepy. Any +continuous repetition of a sound creates boredom and sleep. You feel relaxed, but this +relaxation is just on the surface. Within, you remain the same. + +Go on practicing a mantra every day, and you will feel a certain stillness — but not really, +because your diseases have not changed, your personality structure remains the same. It +is just whitewashed. Stop the mantra, stop the practice, and all your diseases will come +up again. + +This is happening everywhere. Seekers move from one teacher to another. They go on +moving, practicing, and when they stop their practice they find they are the same; nothing +has happened. Nothing will happen in this way. These are cultivated silences. You have +to go on cultivating them. + +Of course, if you go on cultivating them, they remain with you just like a habit, but if you +break the habit they disappear. A real silence comes not by just using some superficial +technique, but by being aware of all that you are — not only being aware, but remaining +with the fact of what you are. + +Remain with the fact. This is very difficult because the mind wants change. How to +change violence, how to change depression, how to change unhappiness? The mind seeks +change to create somehow a better image in the future. Because of this, one goes on +seeking this and that method. + +Remain with the fact, and don't try to change it. Do this for one year. Fix a date, and say +that "From this date, for one year, I will not think in terms of change. I will remain with +whatsoever I am; I will just be alert and aware." I am not saying that you are not to do +anything, but that alertness is the only effort. You have to be alert, not thinking in terms +of change; remaining whatsoever you are — good, bad or whatsoever. One year, with no +attitude of change, just being alert, suddenly one day you will find you are no more the +same. Alertness will have changed everything. + +In Zen, they call it "zazen" — just sitting and doing nothing. Whatsoever happens, +happens; you are just sitting. Zazen means just sitting, doing nothing. In Zen monasteries, + + + +monks will sit for years, the whole day. + + +You will think they are meditating. They are not! They are just sitting silently. And by +silence it is not that they are using some mantra to create any silence; they are simply +sitting. If a leg goes dead, they feel it. They are alert. If the body feels tired, they are +alert: the body feels tired. This is how the body has to feel. If thoughts are moving, they +know it. They are not trying to stop them; they are not trying to push them away. They +are not doing anything. Thoughts are just there like clouds in the sky, but they know the +clouds cannot destroy the sky: they come and go. + +So thoughts are moving in the sky of consciousness; they come and go. They don’t force +them, they don’t stop them, they don’t do anything;. They are just alert that the thoughts +are moving. Sometimes depression comes, a cloud; everything becomes shadowy. +Sometimes happiness comes, a sunshine; everything starts dancing, as if flowers have +opened all over the consciousness. But they are not disturbed by either this or that, by +cloudy weather or by sunshine. They just wait and see that things are moving. They are +just sitting on the bank of a river, and everything goes on moving. They don't try to +change anything. + +If a bad thought comes, they don’t say, "This is bad," because the moment you say, "This +is bad," you have a greed to change it. The moment you say, "This is bad," you have +pushed it away; you have condemned it, and you would like to change it into something +good. + +They simply say this is this, that is that — no condemnation, no evaluation, no +justification. Simply, watching, witnessing. + +Sometimes they forget witnessing. Then too they are not disturbed. They know that "Of +course it is so," that "I forgot to witness; now I remember and I will witness again." They +don’t create any problem. They live what is. Years come and go, and they go on sitting +and seeing what is. + +Then one day everything disappears. Just like a dream, everything disappears and you are +awakened. This awakening is not a practiced thing; this awakening is not cultivated. This +awakening is your nature, your basic nature. It has erupted because you could wait +patiently and watch, and you didn’t create any problems. Remember this as a very basic +thing: don't create problems, don't create problems! + +One lady was here just two or three days ago. She said, "My mind is sexual, so what can I +do?" Someone else came and said, "I feel very inferior; an inferiority complex is there. +What can I do?" So I told that man, "You feel inferior, so feel inferior; know that you feel +like that. What to do? There is nothing to do. One feels sexual, so feel sexual. Know that +you are sexual." But the moment I say such things to someone, he feels shocked. He had +come for a technique to change himself + +No one accepts himself; you are such enemies to yourself. You have never had any love +for yourself; you have never been at ease with yourself. + +And this is surprising: you expect everyone to love you, and you yourself cannot even +love yourself. You are so against yourself, you would like to shatter yourself in every +way and create another. If you were allowed you would create another man. And you +would not be satisfied with that either because you would still remain behind it. + +Love yourself, accept yourself, and don’t create unnecessary problems. And all problems +are unnecessary; there are no necessary problems. I have not come across any. Remain + + + +with your "facticity," and transformation will happen. But it is not a result, you cannot +force it to happen. It is a consequence, not a result. If you accept yourself and remain +alert, it comes. You cannot force it, you cannot say that "I will force it to come." And if +you force, a false thing will happen to you, and then that false thing can be disturbed by +anyone -by anyone — + +The last question: + +Question 4 + +"YOU SAID THAT ACCEPTANCE TRANSFORMS BUT WHY IS IT THAT WHEN I +ACCEPT MY SENSES AND DESIRES I FEEL THAT I HAVE BECOME ANIMAL- +LIKE INSTEAD OF TRANSFORMED?" + +This is your transformation; this is your reality. And what is wrong in being an animal? I +have not seen a single man who can be compared to any animal. Suzuki used to say, "I +love a frog, even a frog, more than a man. Look at a frog sitting near a pond: how +meditatively a frog sits! Look at him, how meditative he is — not disturbed by the whole +world going on, just sitting and sitting and meditating, one with existence." + +Suzuki said, "When I was unenlightened I was a man, and when I became enlightened I +became just like a cat." + +Look at a cat: she knows the secret of how to relax and she has not read any books about +relaxation. How to relax? Look at a cat. No man can be a better teacher than a cat. The +cat is relaxed and alert. If you relax, you go to sleep. The cat is alert even in her sleep, +and the body is so flexible, so relaxed in every moment. + +What is wrong in being an animal? Man, through his ego, has created comparisons. He +says, "We are not animals." But no animal would like to be a human being. They are at +ease, at home in existence. They are not worried, they are not tense. Of course, they don’t +create any religion because they don’t need to. They don't have any psychoanalysts — not +because they are undeveloped, but because they don’t need any. + +What is wrong with animals? Why this condemnation? This condemnation is part of the +human ego. Man thinks in terms of being the superior one, the highest in the hierarchy. +No animal has consented to this hierarchy. Darwin said that man has evolved out of +monkeys, but if you ask monkeys I am afraid they will not say that man is an evolution; +they will say he is a degradation. Man thinks himself as the center. There is no need for +this. This is only egoistic nonsense. + +If you feel like being an animal, nothing is wrong in it. + +Be one, and be one totally — and be one with full alertness. That alertness will first +uncover your animal because that is your reality. Your humanity is just false, skin-deep. +Someone insults you, and the animal comes out — not the human being. Someone +condemns you, and the animal comes out — not the human being. It is there, and your +humanity is just skin-deep. If you accept everything, this skin-deep humanity will +disappear. This is a false thing, and you can become aware of your real animal. And it is +good to become aware of reality. If you go on being alert, within this animal you will find +the divine. And it is always better to be a real animal than to be an unreal man. Reality is +the point. + +So I am not against animals, I am only against falsities. Don’t be a false human being. Be +a real animal, and with that reality you will have become authentic, substantial. Now go +on being alert, and by and by you will come to a deeper layer which is more real than the +animal — and that is the divine. + + + +The divine is not only in you, remember; it is in all animals. It is not only that it is in +animals: it is in all the trees, it is in the rocks. The divine is the basic center in everything. +You can lose it only by being false, and you can gain it again by being real. + +THE END. + + + +Chapter 38: From the wave to the cosmic ocean + + +SUTRAS + +AS WAVES COME WITH WATER AND FLAMES WITH FIRE, SO THE +UNIVERSAL WAVES WITH US. + +WHEREVER YOUR MIND IS WANDERING, INTERNALLY OR EXTERNALLY, +AT THIS VERY PLACE, THIS. + +WHEN VIVIDLY AWARE THROUGH SOME PARTICULAR SENSE, KEEP IN THE +AWARENESS. + +Sri Aurobindo says somewhere that the whole life is yoga — and it is so. Everything can +become a meditation. And unless everything becomes a meditation, meditation has not +happened to you. Meditation cannot be a part, a fragment. Either it is — and when it is +you are wholly in it — or it is not. You cannot make a part of your life meditative. That is +impossible, and that is what is being tried everywhere. + +You can become meditative, not a part of you; that is impossible because meditation is a +quality of your being. It is just like breathing: you go on breathing whatsoever you are +doing. Irrelevant of what you are doing, you go on breathing. Walking, sitting, lying, +sleeping, you continue breathing. You cannot arrange it in such a way that sometimes +you breathe and sometimes you don't breathe. It is a continuum. + +Meditation is an inner breathing, and when I say "an inner breathing," I mean it literally; +it is not a metaphor. Just as you are breathing air you can breathe consciousness, and +once you start breathing consciousness in and out you are no more just a physical body. + +And with that start, beginning with a higher breathing — a breathing of consciousness, of +life itself, as it were — you enter a different realm, a different dimension. That dimension +is metaphysics. + +Your breathing is physical; meditation is metaphysical. So you cannot make a part of +your life meditative. You cannot meditate in the morning and then forget it. You cannot +go to a temple or to a church and meditate there and come out of your meditation as you +come out of the temple. That is not possible, and if you try it you will be trying a false +thing. You can enter a church and you come out of it, but you cannot enter meditation +and come out of it. When you enter, you have entered. Wherever you go now meditation +will be you. This is one of the basic, primary, elemental facts to be remembered always. +Secondly, you can enter meditation from anywhere because the whole life is in a deep +meditation. The hills are meditating, the stars are meditating, the flowers, the trees, the +elements are meditating, the very earth is meditating. The whole life is meditating, and +you can enter it from anywhere; anything can become an entrance. This has been used. +That is why there are so many techniques; that is why there are so many religions; that is +why one religion cannot understand another — because their entrances are different. And +sometimes there are religions which are not known even by the name of religion. + +You will not recognize certain persons as religious because their entrance is so different. +For example, a poet. A poet can enter meditation without going to any teacher, without +going to any temple, without in any way being religious, so-called religious. His poetry, +his creativity, can become an entrance; he can enter through it. Or a potter who is just +creating earthen pots can enter meditation just by creating earthen pots. The very craft + + + +can become an entry. Or an archer can become meditative through his archery, or a +gardener, or anyone can enter from anywhere. Whatsoever you can do can become a +door. If the quality of awareness changes while you are doing something, it becomes a +technique. So there can be as many techniques as you can imagine. Any act can become a +door. So the act, the technique, the way, the method, is not primary, but the quality of +consciousness that you bring to the act is the basic thing. + +Kabir, one of India's greatest mystics, was a weaver, and he remained a weaver even +when he attained. He had thousands and thousands of disciples, and they would come and +they would tell him, "Now stop your weaving. You don’t need it. We are here and we will +serve you in every way. + +" Kabir would laugh and he would say, "This weaving is not just weaving. I am making +clothes — that is the outer act — but something goes on within me simultaneously that you +cannot see. + +This is my meditation." How can a weaver be a meditator through weaving? If the quality +of the mind that you bring to weaving is meditative, then the act is not relevant; it is +irrelevant. + +Another mystic was a potter; his name was Gora. He worked on earthen pots, and he +would dance and he would sing while he was making his pots. While he was making a +pot on the wheel, as the pot would center on the wheel he would also center within +himself. One would see only one thing: the wheel was moving, the earthen pot was +emerging and he was centering the earthen pot. You were seeing only one centering. +Another centering was happening simultaneously: he was also being centered. While +centering the pot, while helping the pot to emerge, he was also emerging in the unseen +world of inner consciousness. When the pot was created, that was not the real thing he +was working on; he was also creating himself. + +Any act can become meditative, and once you know how an act becomes meditative you +can transfonn all your acts into meditation. Then the whole life becomes yoga. Walking +on the street or working in the office or just sitting and not doing anything — just idling, +or anything — can become meditation. So remember, meditation doesn’t belong to the act; +it belongs to the quality you bring to the act. Now we will enter the techniques. + +First: + +"AS WAVES COME WITH WATER AND FLAMES WITH FIRE, SO THE +UNIVERSAL WAVES WITH US." + + +First try to understand what a wave is, and then you can feel how this consciousness of +waves can help you to enter into meditation. You see waves in the ocean. They appear; +they are in a sense, and still in a deeper sense they are not. This is the first thing to be +understood about a wave. The wave appears; it is there in a sense, but still it is not there +in a deeper sense. In a deeper sense only the ocean is. You cannot have a wave without +the ocean, and even while the wave is there, only the ocean is. The wave is just a form, +not a substance. The ocean is substantial; the wave is just a form. + +Because of language many problems are created. Because we say "wave," it looks as if a +wave is some thing. It would be better if we use not wave, but "waving." There is no +wave, just waving — just an activity, not a thing; just a movement, not a substance; just a +process, not matter. The matter is the ocean; the wave is just a form. The ocean can be + + + +silent. The waves will disappear, but the ocean will be there. + +The ocean can be silent or in movement or in much activity or in no activity, but you +cannot find a silent wave. A wave is activity, not a substance. When the activity is there, +the wave is there: it is a waving, a movement — a simple form of movement. But when +the silence comes, when inactivity comes, the wave is no more and the ocean is there. In +both the cases the ocean is the reality. + +The wave is just a play-form. The wave happens and disappears, the ocean remains. +Secondly, waves appear as individuals. Each wave has its own personality — unique, +different from any other. No two waves are similar. Some waves are big, some waves are +small. They have their own peculiar characteristics. Each wave has its own character, +and, of course, each wave is different from the other. One wave may rise, another may +die. While one is rising, another is dying. Both cannot be the same because one is rising, +another is dying. Still, the reality behind both is the same. They look different, they look +separate, they look individual, but the look is fallacious. Deep down only one ocean is, +and no matter how they look unrelated they are related. And while one wave is rising and +another is dying, you may not see any relationship; the relationship may not appear, +because how can a rising wave be related to a dying wave? + +An old man is dying and a child is bom: how are they related? If they are related, they +will die both together or they will be born together. The child is bom and the old man has +died; one wave is dying, another is arising. But the rising wave may be gathering energy +from the dying wave. The dying wave may be helping it, by its death, to rise. The +dispersing wave may be the cause of the wave that is rising. + +Deep down they are related to one ocean. + +They are not different; they are not unrelated, they are not separate. Their individuality is +false and illusory. They are non-individual. Their duality appears to be, but it is not so: +their non-duality is the truth. + +Now I will read the sutra again: "AS WAVES COME WITH WATER AND FLAMES +WITH FIRE, SO THE UNIVERSAL WAVES WITH US." We are just waves in a +cosmic ocean. Meditate on it, allow this feeling to go deep down within you. Start feeling +your breathing as just the rising of a wave. You breathe in, you breathe out, and the +breath that is entering you was someone else's breath just a moment before and the breath +that is leaving you will become someone else's breath the next moment. Breathing is just +waving in the ocean of life. You are not separate — just waves. You are one deep down. +We have a togetherness; individuality is false and illusory. Hence, the ego is the only +barrier. Individuality is false. It appears to be, but it is not real. The real is the non- +individual, the oceanic, the togetherness. + +That is why every religion is against the egoistic attitude. The person who says there is +no God may not be irreligious, but the person who says "I am" is irreligious. + +Gautam Buddha was an atheist; he didn’t believe in any God. Mahavira Vardhaman was +an atheist; he didn’t believe in any God. But they achieved, they arrived, they realized the +totality, the wholeness. + +If you don’t believe in any God you may not be irreligious, because God is not basic to +religion. Non-ego is basic to religion. And even if you believe in God, with an egoist +mind you are irreligious. With a non-egoistic mind there is no need to believe in a God. +You fall into the divine automatically. With no ego you cannot cling to the wave; you + + + +have to fall to the ocean. With the ego, you go on clinging to the wave. Look at life as an +ocean, and feel yourself just as a wave, and allow this feeling to enter in you. + +You can use this technique in many ways. While breathing, feel that the ocean is +breathing in you. The ocean comes to you, goes out, comes in, goes out. With every +breath feel a wave rising, with every exhalation feel a wave dying. And between the two, +who are you? Just a nothingness, shunya — a void. With that feeling of the void you will +be transformed. With that feeling of nothingness all your misery will disappear, because +misery needs a center — and a false center at that. The void is your real center. With it +there is no misery; you are in a deep ease. Because you are not, who can be tense? You +are bliss-filled. It is not that you are bliss-filled, but because you are not, only bliss is. +Without you, can you create misery? + +That is why Buddha never says that in that state, the ultimate state, there will be +ANANDA — bliss. He never says it. + +He says that there will be no misery, that is all. To talk about bliss may mislead you, so +Buddha says don't ask about bliss; simply try to know how you can be without misery. +And that means how you can be without yourself. + +What is our problem? The problem is that the wave thinks itself separate from the ocean; +then there are problems. If a wave thinks itself separate from the ocean, the fear of death +will immediately come. The wave has to die and the wave can see all around dying +waves. And you cannot deceive yourself for long. The wave is seeing that other waves +are dying, and the wave knows that even in its rising, death is hidden somewhere, +because those other waves a moment before were rising and now they are falling down, +dispersing. So you are to die. If the wave thinks itself separate from the ocean the fear of +death is bound to appear sooner or later. But if the wave knows that it is not and only the +ocean is, there is no fear of death. Only a wave can die, not the ocean. I can die, but not +life. You can die, you will die — but not the cosmos, not the existence. The existence +goes on waving. It has waved in you, it will wave in others. And while your wave may be +disappearing, just by your dispersal other waves will arise and the ocean continues. + +Once you detach yourself from the wave form, and you become one and feel one and +realize oneness with the ocean, the formless, there is no death for you. + +Otherwise the fear of death will create misery. In every pain, in every anguish, in every +anxiety, the basic fear is of death. You are afraid, trembling. You may not be conscious +of it, but if you penetrate within you will find that every moment there is a trembling +because you are going to die. + +You may create many securities, you may create a citadel around you, but nothing is +going to help. Nothing is going to help! Dust unto dust! You are going to fall back down. +Have you ever observed or have you ever meditated on the fact that when you are just +walking on the road dust clings to your shoe? The dust may have been the body of a +Napoleon, of an Alexander. Somewhere, Alexander is just dust now, and the dust +clinging to your shoe may have once been the body of Alexander. + +The same is going to be the case with you. Now you are here, and the next moment you +will not be; the same is going to be the case with you! Sooner or later the dust will go +unto dust, the wave will disappear. Fear grips. Just imagine yourself as dust clinging to +somebody's shoe or imagine some potter making an earthen pot of you, of your body, or +of your beloved's body, or imagine yourself moving into a worm or becoming a tree. But +this is happening. Everything is a form and form has to die. Only the formless is eternal. + + + +If you cling to the form, if you identify yourself with the fonn, if you feel yourself as a +wave form, you are getting into trouble by yourself. + +You are the ocean, not the wave. + +This meditation can help; it can bring a metamorphosis for you, it can become a +mutation. But allow it to spread all through your life. While breathing, think; while +eating, think; while walking, think. Think two things — that the form is always the wave +and the fonnless is always the ocean. The formless is deathless; the form is mortal. And it +is not that you will die someday, you are dying every day. Childhood dies and "youth- +hood" is bom; then "youth-hood" dies and the old age is bom; then the old age dies and +the form disappears. + +Every moment you are dying into something else; something else is born. Your first day +of birth is not the first day of your only birth; that is simply part of many more births to +come. And your death of this life is not the first death: it is only the death of this life. You +have been dying before. Every moment something is dying and something else is bom. A +part of you dies; another part is born. + +Physiologists say that within seven years nothing old remains in your body; everything +changes — every cell. If you are going to live for seventy years, ten times over your body +is renewed again and again. Every seven years you have a new body. Not suddenly, but +every moment something is changing. + +You are a wave, and that too not substantial; every moment you are changing. And a +wave cannot be static, a wave has to be changing; a wave has to be constantly in +movement. + +There can be no phenomenon like a non-moving wave. How can there be? A non-moving +wave makes no sense. There is movement, process; you are a process, a movement. If +you become identified with this movement and process and think yourself confined +between birth and death, you will be in misery. Then you are taking appearance as +reality. This is what Shankara calls MAYA — illusion. The ocean is the BRAHMAN, the +ocean is the truth. + +So think yourself as a wave, or as a continuum of waves rising and falling, and just be a +witness to this. You cannot do anything. These waves will disappear. That which has +appeared will have to disappear; nothing can be done about it. Every effort is absolutely +useless. Only one thing can be done, and that is to be a witness of this wave form. Once +you become a witness, suddenly you will become aware of something which is beyond +the wave, which transcends the wave, which is in the wave also and out of the wave also, +which forms the wave and still goes beyond, which is the ocean. + +"AS WAVES COME WITH WATER AND FLAMES WITH FIRE, SO THE +UNIVERSAL WAVES WITH US." The universal waves with us. You are not, the +universal is — and he is waving through you. Feel it, contemplate over it, meditate on it. +Allow it to happen to you in many, many ways. + +I told you about breathing. A sex desire arises in you: feel it — not as your desire, but just +as the ocean waving in you, just as life pulsating, just as life having a wave in you. + +You meet in a love act: don’t think of it as two waves meeting, don't think of it as two +individuals meeting. Rather, think of it as two individuals merging. There are no more +two individuals. Waves have disappeared; only the ocean has remained. Then the sex act +becomes a meditation. Whatsoever happens to you, feel it not as if it is happening to you, + + + +but as if it is happening to the cosmos. You are just a part of it — just a wave on the +surface. Leave everything to the Universe. + +Dogen, a Zen master, used to say, when he felt hungry he would say, "It seems the +universal feels hungry through me." When he would feel thirsty he would say, "The +existence is thirsty within me." This is what this meditation will lead you to. Then +everything disperses from your ego and becomes part of the universe. Then whatsoever +happens, happens to existence itself; you are no more here. Then there is no sin, then +there is no responsibility. + +I don't mean that you will become irresponsible; I don’t mean that you will become a +sinner. Sin will be impossible because sin can happen only around an ego. There will be +no responsibility because sin can happen only around an ego. There will be no +responsibility because now you cannot be irresponsible. Only you are, so to whom can +you be responsible? And now if you see someone dying, you will feel you are dying with +him, within him. The Universe is dying and you are part of it. + +And if you will see some flower flowering, you will flower with it. The whole universe +will become you now. To be in such a deep affinity and harmony is to be in SAMADHI. +Meditation is the way, and this hannony of oneness, this feeling of oneness with all, is +the end, is the goal. Try it! Remember the ocean and forget the wave. And whenever you +remember the wave and start behaving as the wave, remember, you are doing something +wrong and you will create misery because of it. + +There is no God who is punishing you. Whenever you fall a prey to some illusion, you +punish yourself. The law, DHARMA, the Tao is there. If you move in harmony with it, +you feel blissful. If you move against it, you feel yourself to be in misery. There is no one +sitting there in the skies to punish you. There is no record of your sins; there is no need +for this. It is just like gravity. If you walk rightly, the gravity is a help. You cannot walk +without it. If you walk wrongly, you will fall down, you may get a fracture. But no one is +punishing you; it is just the law, the gravity — the impersonal gravity. + +If you walk wrongly and you fall down, you will have a fracture. If you walk rightly, you +use gravity. The energy can be used wrongly or rightly. When you feel yourself as a +wave, you are against the universal law, you are against the reality. Then you will create +misery for yourself. + +This is what the law of KARMA means. There is no law-giver; God is not a judge. To be +a judge is ugly, and if God were a judge, he would be completely bored, or else he would +have gone mad by now. He is not a judge, he is not a controller, he is not a law-giver. + +The universe has its own laws, and the basic law is that to be real is to be in bliss, to be +unreal is to be in misery. + +The second technique: + +"WHEREVER YOUR MIND IS WANDERING, INTERNALLY OR EXTERNALLY, +AT THIS VERY PLACE, THIS." + +This mind is the door — this very mind. Wherever it is wandering, whatsoever it is +thinking, contemplating, dreaming, this very mind, this very moment, is the door. This is +a very revolutionary method because we never think that the ordinary mind is the door. +We think that some supennind — a Buddha, a Jesus — can enter, that they have some +superhuman mind. This very mind that you have — this mind which goes on dreaming +and imagining relevant or irrelevant thoughts, which is crowded with ugly desires, + + + +passions, anger, greed, all that is condemned, which is there beyond your control, pulling +you here and there, pushing you from here and there, constantly a madhouse — this very +mind, says this sutra, is the door. Wherever your mind is wandering — wherever +remember; the object is not relevant — wherever your mind is wandering, internally or +externally, "AT THIS VERY PLACE, THIS." + + +Many things have to be understood. One, the ordinary mind is not so ordinary as we +think. The ordinary mind is not unrelated to the universal mind: it is part of it. Its roots go +down to the very center of existence; otherwise you cannot be. Even a sinner is grounded +into the divine; otherwise he cannot be. Even if the devil is there, he cannot be without +divine support. + +Existence itself is possible only because of the groundedness into the being. Your mind is +dreaming, imagining, wandering, tense, in anguish, in misery. Howsoever it moves and +wheresoever it moves, it remains grounded in the totality. Otherwise is not possible. You +cannot go away from existence; that is impossible. This very moment you are grounded +in it. + +So what is to be done? If this very moment we are grounded in it, then it will appear to +the egoist mind that nothing is to be done. We are already the divine, so why so much +fuss? You are grounded in the divine, but you are unaware of the fact. When mind is +wandering, there are two things — the mind and the wandering, the objects in the mind +and the mind itself, clouds wandering in the sky and the sky. There are two things — the +clouds and the sky. + +Sometimes it may happen, it happens, that there are so many clouds that the sky +disappears, you cannot see it. But even if you cannot see it, it has not disappeared; it +cannot disappear. + +There is no way to help the sky to disappear. It is there; hidden or unhidden, visible or +invisible, it is there. + +But clouds are also there. If you pay attention to the clouds, the sky has disappeared. If +you pay attention to the sky, the clouds are just accidental, they come and they go. You +need not be too much worried about them. They come and they go. They have been +coming, they have been going. They have not been destroying the sky even an inch, they +have not made the sky dirty; they have not even touched it. The sky remains virgin. + +When your mind is wandering, there are two things: one is the clouds, the thoughts, the +objects, images, and the other is the consciousness, the mind itself. If you pay too much +attention to the clouds, to objects, thoughts, images, you have forgotten the sky. You +have forgotten the host; you have become too much interested in the guest. Those +thoughts, images, wandering, are just guests. If you focus yourself on the guests, you +forget your own being. Change the focus from the guests to the host, from the clouds to +the sky. Do it practically. + +A sex desire arises: this is a cloud. Or a greed arises to have a bigger house: this is a +cloud. You can become so obsessed with it that you forget completely to whom it has +arisen, to whom it has happened. Who is behind it? In what sky is this cloud moving? +Remember that sky, and suddenly the cloud disappears. + + +You need just a change of focus from the object to the subject, from the outer to the +inner, from the cloud to the sky, from the guest to the host — just a change of focus. + + + +Lin-Chi, one Zen master, was speaking. Someone said from the crowd, "Answer me only +one question: Who am I? + +"Lin-Chi stopped speaking. Everyone was alert. What answer was he going to give? But +he didn’t answer. He came down from his chair, walked, came near to the man. The +whole crowd became attentive, alert. They were not even breathing. What was he going +to do? He should have answered from the chair; there was no need. The man became +afraid, and Lin-Chi came near him with his piercing eyes. He took the man’s collar in his +hand, gave him a shake and asked him, "Close your eyes! And remember who is asking +this question, ’Who am I?'" The man closed his eyes — afraid, of course. He went within +to seek who had asked this question, and he would not come back. + +The crowd waited and waited and waited. His face became silent calm, still. Then Lin- +Chi had to shock him again. "Now come out and tell everybody, 'Who am I?"' + +The man started laughing and he said, "What a miraculous way of answering a thing. But +if someone asks me this now, I am going to do the same. I cannot answer." + +It was just a change of focus. You ask the question "Who am I?" and your mind is +focused on the question and the answer is hidden just behind the question in the +questioner. + +Change the focus; return to yourself. + +This sutra says, "WHEREVER YOUR MIND IS WANDERING, INTERNALLY OR +EXTERNALLY, AT THIS VERY PLACE, THIS." Move from the objects to the mind +itself, and you are no more an ordinary mind. You are ordinary because of the objects. +Suddenly you become a buddha yourself. You are already a buddha, you are just +burdened with many clouds. And not only are you burdened: you are clinging to your +clouds, you won’t allow them to move. You think that clouds are your property. You +think that the more you have, the better: you are richer. And your whole sky, your inner +space, is just hidden. In a way, it has disappeared amidst the clouds and clouds have +become your life. The life of the clouds is sansara — the world. + +This can happen in a single moment even, this change of focus — and it always happens +suddenly. I don’t mean that you need not do anything and it will happen suddenly; you +will have to do much. But it will never happen gradually. You will have to do and do and +do, and one day, suddenly, a moment comes when you are at the right temperature to +evaporate. Suddenly there is no water; it has evaporated. Suddenly you are not in the +object. Your eyes are not focused to the clouds: suddenly they have turned inward to the +inner space. + +It never happens gradually that one part of your eyes has turned inward and one part is +with the outward clouds — nor does it happen in percentages, that now you have become +ten percent inner and ninety percent outer, now twenty percent inner and eighty percent +outer — no! When it happens it happens a hundred percent, because you cannot divide +your focusing. + +Either you see the objects or you see yourself — either the world or the BRAHMAN. You +can come back to the world, you can change your focus again; you are the master. Really, +only now are you the master — when you can change your focus as you like. + +I remember Marpa, one Tibetan mystic. When he realized, when he became a Buddha, +when he turned inward, when he came to encounter the inner space — the infinity, +someone asked him, "Marpa, how are you now?" + +Marpa's answer is exceptional, unexpected. No buddha has answered that way. Marpa + + + +said, "As miserable as before." + +The man was bewildered. He said, "As miserable as before?" + +But Marpa laughed. He said, "Yes, but with a difference, and the difference is that now +the misery is voluntary. Sometimes, just for a taste of the world, I move outwards, but +now I am the master. Any moment I can go inwards, and it is good to move in the +polarities. Then one remains alive. I can move!" Marpa said, "I can move now. + +Sometimes I move in the miseries, but now the miseries are not something which happen +to me. I happen to them and I remain untouched." Of course, when you move voluntarily, +you remain untouched. + +Once you know how to change your focus inwards, you can come back to the world. +Every buddha has come back to the world. Again he focuses, but now the inner man has a +different quality. He knows that this is his focusing. + +These clouds are allowed to move. These clouds are not masters; they cannot dominate +you. You allow them, and it is beautiful. Sometimes, when the sky is fdled with clouds, it +is beautiful; the movement of the clouds is beautiful. If the sky remains itself, the clouds +can be allowed to move. The problem arises only when the sky forgets itself and only +clouds are there. Then everything becomes ugly because the freedom is lost. + +This sutra is beautiful. "WHEREVER YOUR MIND IS WANDERING, INTERNALLY +OR EXTERNALLY, AT THIS VERY PLACE, THIS". This sutra has been used deeply +in Zen tradition. Zen says your ordinary mind is the buddha-mind. Eating, you are a +buddha; sleeping, you are a buddha; carrying water from the well, you are a buddha. You +are! Carrying water from the well, eating your food, lying down on your bed, you are a +buddha. Inconceivable! It looks puzzling, but it is the truth. + +If when carrying water you simply carry the water, if you don't make any problem out of +it and you simply carry water, if your mind is unclouded and the sky vacant, if you are +just carrying water, then you are a buddha. Eating, just eat without doing anything else. +When we are eating we are doing thousands and thousands of things. The mind may not +be here at all. Your body may be eating just like a robot; your mind may be somewhere +else. + +One university student was here some days before. + +His examination is coming near, so he came to ask me, "I am very much confused and the +problem is this: I have fallen in love with a girl. While I am with the girl, I think of my +examination, and while I read I think only of my girl. So what to do? While reading, +studying, I am not there, I am with my girl in my imagination. And with my girl, I am +never with her; I am thinking about my problems, about my examination which is +drawing near. So everything has become a mess." + +This is how everyone has become a mess, not only that boy. While in the office you think +of the house; while in the house you are in the office. And you cannot do such a magical +thing. While in the house you can be only in the house, you cannot be in the office. And +if you are in the office, you are not sane, you are insane. Then everything gets into +everything else. Then nothing is clear. And this mind is a problem. + +While drawing water from a well, carrying water from a well, if you are simply doing +this simple act, you are a buddha. So many times, if you go to Zen masters and ask them, +"What do YOU do? What is your SADHANA? What is your meditation?" they will say, +"While feeling sleepy, we sleep. While feeling hungry, we eat. And that is all, there is no +other SADHANA." But this is very arduous. It looks simple: if while eating you can just + + + +eat, if while sitting you can just sit — not doing anything else, if you can remain with the +moment and not move away from it, if you can be merged with the moment with no +future, no past, if this moment now is the only existence, then you are a buddha. + +This very mind becomes a buddha-mind. + +When your mind wanders, don’t try to stop it. Rather, become aware of the sky. When +mind wanders, don't try to stop it, don't try to bring it to some point, to some +concentration — no! Allow it to wander, but don’t pay much attention to the wandering — +because for or against, you remain concerned with the wandering. + +Remember the sky, allow the wandering, and just say, "Okay, it is just a traffic on the +road. Many people are moving this way and that. The same traffic is going on in the +mind. I am just the sky, not the cloud." Feel it, remember it, and remain in it. Sooner or +later you will feel that the clouds are slowing down and there are bigger gaps between the +clouds. They are not so dark, not so dense. The speed has slowed down, and intervals can +be seen, and the sky can be looked at. Go on feeling yourself as the sky and not the +clouds. Sooner or later, someday, in some right moment when your focus has really gone +inwards, clouds will have disappeared and you are the sky, the ever-pure sky, the ever- +virgin sky. + +Once you know this virginity, you can come back to the clouds, to the world of the +clouds. Then that world has its own beauty. You can move in it, but now you are a +master. The world is not bad; the world as the master is the problem. With you as the +master, you can move in it. Then the world has a beauty of its own. + +It is beautiful, it is lovely, but you need to know that beauty and that loveliness as a +master within. + +The third technique: + +"WHEN VIVIDLY AWARE THROUGH SOME PARTICULAR SENSE, KEEP IN +THE AWARENESS." + +You see through your eyes. Remember, you see THROUGH your eyes. Eyes cannot see; +you see through them. The seer is hidden behind, the eyes are just the opening, just the +windows. But we go on thinking that we see by the eyes; we go on thinking we hear by +the ears. No one has ever heard by the ears. You hear THROUGH the ears, not BY the +ears. The hearer is hidden behind. The ears are just receptive organs. + +I touch you: I give you a loving touch, a handclasp. The hand is not touching you: I am +touching you, through the hand. The hand is just instrumental, so there can be two types +of touch — when I really touch you and when I just avoid touch. I can touch your hand +and avoid touch. I may not be there in my hand, I may have withdrawn. Try this, and you +will have a different, a distant feeling. Put your hand on someone and withdraw yourself. +A dead hand is there, not you. And if the other is sensitive, he will feel a dead hand. He +will feel insulted. You are deceiving; you are just showing that you are touching, and you +are not touching. + +Women are very sensitive about it; you cannot deceive them. They have a greater +sensitivity of touch, of body touch, so they know. + +The husband may be talking beautiful things. He may have brought flowers and he may +be saying, "I love you," but his touch will show that he is not there. And women have an +instinctive feeling when you are with them and when you are not with them. It is difficult + + + +to deceive them unless you are a master. Unless you are a master of your own self, you +cannot deceive them. But a master would not like to become a husband, that is the +difficulty. + +Whatsoever you say will be false; your touch will show it. Children are very sensitive, +you cannot deceive them. You may pat them, but they know that this is a dead pat. If +your hand is not a flowing energy, a loving energy, they know. Then it is just as if a dead +thing is being used. When you are present in your hand in your totality, when you have +moved, when your center of being has come to the hand, when your soul is there, then the +touch has a different quality. + +This sutra says that the senses are just doors, receiving stations, mediums, instruments, +receptors. You are hidden behind. "WHEN VIVIDLY AWARE THROUGH SOME +PARTICULAR SENSE, KEEP IN THE AWARENESS." While hearing music, don’t +forget yourself in the ear, don’t lose yourself into the ear. Remember the awareness that is +hidden behind. Be alert! While seeing someone... Try this. You can try it right now, +looking at me. What is happening? You can look at me by the eyes, and when I say "by +the eyes," it means you are not aware that you are hidden behind the eyes. + +You can look at me through the eyes, and when I say "through the eyes," then the eyes +are just in between you and me. You are standing there behind the eyes, looking through +the eyes, just as if someone looks through a window or specs. + +Have you seen some clerk in a bank looking from above his specs? The specs have +slipped down on his nose, and he looks. Just look that way at me, towards me, as if you +are looking from above your eyes, as if the eyes have slipped down a little on your nose +and you are standing behind looking at me. Suddenly you will feel a change in the +quality. Your focus changes; eyes become just doors. This becomes a meditation. + +When hearing, just hear through the ears and remain aware of your inner center. When +touching, just touch through the hand and remember the inner one who is hidden behind. +From any sense you can have a feeling of the inner center, and every sense goes to the +inner center. It has to report. That is why, when you are seeing me and you are hearing +me, when you see me through the eyes and you hear me through the ears, deep down +within you know that you are seeing the same man whom you are also hearing. + +If I have some body odor your nose will smell it. Then three different senses report to one +center. That is why you can coordinate. Otherwise it will be difficult: if your eyes see and +your ears hear, it will be difficult to know whether you are hearing the same man whom +you are seeing or two different ones, because these two senses are different and they +never meet. + +Your eyes have never known about your ears and your ears have not heard about your +eyes. They don’t know each other, they have never met; they have not even been +introduced. + +So how does everything become synthetic? Ears hear, eyes see, hands touch, the nose +smells, and suddenly somewhere inside you know that this is the same man that you are +hearing and seeing and touching and smelling. This knower is different from the senses. +Every sense reports to this knower, and in this knower, in the center, everything falls, fits +and becomes one. This is miraculous. + +I am one, outside you. I am one! My body and body's presence, my body odor, my +speaking, are one. Your senses will divide me. Your ears will report if I say something, +your nose will report if there is some odor, your eyes will report if I can be seen and am + + + +visible. They will divide me into parts. But again, somewhere within you, I will become +one. Where I become one within you is your center of being. That is your awareness, and +you have forgotten it completely. This forgetfulness is the ignorance, and the awareness +will open the doors for self-knowledge. And you cannot know yourself in any other way. +"WHEN VIVIDLY AWARE THROUGH SOME PARTICULAR SENSE, KEEP IN +THE AWARENESS." Remain with the awareness; keep in the awareness; remain alert. It +is difficult in the beginning. We go on falling asleep, and it seems arduous to look +through the eyes. + +It is easy to look "by" the eyes. In the beginning you will feel a certain strain — if you try +to look through the eyes. Not only will you feel a strain; the person you look at will also +feel a strain. + +If you look at someone through the eyes, he will feel as if you are trespassing upon him, +as if you are doing something unmannerly. If you look through the eyes, the other will +become aware suddenly that you are not behaving properly, because your look will +become piercing, your look will go deeper. If it comes from your depth, it will penetrate +to the other's depth. That is why society has a built-in security: don't look too deeply into +anyone unless you are in love. If you are in love, you can look deeply into the other; you +can penetrate to the very depth because the other is not afraid. The other can be naked, +totally naked, the other can be vulnerable, the other can be open to you. But ordinarily, if +you are not in love, you are not allowed to see directly, to see penetratingly. + +In India, a person who looks in such a way, penetratingly at someone, is called a +LUCHCHA. A LUCHCHA means a seer. The word LUCHCHA comes from LOCHAN; +LOCHAN means eyes, and LUCHCHA means one who has become eyes towards you. + +So don’t try it on someone you don’t know; he will think you are a LUCHCHA. + +First try with objects — a flower, a tree, the stars in the night. They will not feel +trespassed upon and they will not object. + +Rather, they will like it and will feel very good and appreciated. First try with them, then +with loving persons — your wife, your child. Sometimes take your child into your lap and +look at him through the eyes, and the child will understand. He will understand more than +anyone else because he is still uncrippled by the society, still unperverted, still natural. + +He will feel deep love if you look through the eyes; he will feel your presence. + +Look at your lover or beloved, and then only, by and by, as you get the feel of it and as +you become more artful about it, you will be able to look at anyone — because then no +one will be able to know that someone has looked so deeply. And once you have this art +of standing always alert behind your senses, the senses cannot deceive you. Otherwise +the senses deceive you. + +In a world which is just an appearance, they have deceived you to feel it as real. If you +can look through the senses and remain alert, the world will by and by appear to you as +illusory, dream-like, and you will be able to penetrate to the substance — to the very +substance of it. That substance is the BRAHMAN. + + +THE END. + + + +Chapter 40: Sudden Enlightenment and its obstacles + + +The first question: + +Question 1 + +"YOU SAID THAT EITHER ONE SEES THE WORLD OR THE BRAHMAN AND +THAT NO GRADUALLY INCREASING PERCEPTION OF THE BRAHMAN IS +POSSIBLE. BUT IN EXPERIENCE WE FEEL THAT AS WE BECOME AWARE +AND MORE SILENT AND STILL, THE FEELING OF THE DIVINE PRESENCE +BECOMES GRADUALLY CLEARER AND CLEARER. WHAT IS THIS GRADUAL +GROWTH AND CLARITY IF THE AUTHENTIC EXPERIENCE IS NEVER +GRADUAL, BUT SUDDEN?" + +This has been a very ancient problem: "Is enlightenment sudden or gradual?" Many +things have to be understood. There has been a tradition which says that enlightenment is +gradual and that everything can be divided into degrees, everything can be divided into +steps — that like anything else, knowledge can also be divided; you can become more and +more wise, you can become more and more enlightened. This has been widely accepted +because the human mind cannot conceive of anything sudden. Mind wants to divide, +analyze. Mind is a divider. Degrees can be understood by the mind, but suddenness is +non — mental-beyond mind. + +If I say to you that you are ignorant and that gradually you will become wise, this is +comprehensible, you can comprehend it. If I say to you, "No, there is no gradual growth. +Either you are ignorant or you become enlightened, there is a sudden jump," then the +question arises of HOW to become enlightened. If there were no gradualness, there could +be no progress. + +If there were no degree of growth, no degrees, then you could not make progress, you +could not proceed. From where to begin? In a sudden explosion, the beginning and the +end are both the same. There is no gap between the beginning and the end, so from where +to begin? The beginning is the end. + +It becomes a puzzle for the mind, it becomes a koan. But sudden enlightenment seems to +be impossible. It is not that it is impossible, but that the mind cannot conceive of it. And, +remember, how can the mind conceive of enlightenment? It cannot. It has been widely +accepted that this inner explosion is also gradual growth. Even many enlightened persons +have conceded that to your minds, and they have said, "Yes, there is a gradual growth." + +It is not that there is. They have said it and accepted your attitude, your way of +perception. They have been in a deep compassion for you. They know that if you start +thinking that it is gradual, the start will be good, but there will be no gradual growth. But +if you start, if you go on seeking it, someday the sudden thing will happen to you. And if +it is said that enlightenment is only sudden and no gradual growth is possible, you are not +even going to start and it will never happen. Many enlightened persons have said that +enlightenment is a gradual thing just to help you, just to persuade you to start. + +Something is possible through gradual process, but not enlightenment — not +enlightenment, something else. + +And that something else becomes helpful. For example, if you are making water to +evaporate it, heating it, evaporation will come suddenly. At a certain point, at a hundred +degrees, evaporation will happen — suddenly! There will be no gradual growth between + + + +water and vapor. You cannot divide; you cannot say that this water is a little vapor and a +little water. Either it is water or it is all vapor. Suddenly the water jumps into the state of +vapor. There is a jump — not gradual growth. But by heating you are gradually giving +heat to the water. You are helping it to reach the hundred-degree point, the evaporating +point. This is a natural growth. Up to the evaporating point, the water will grow in the +sense of being more and more hot. Then evaporation will happen suddenly. + +So there have been masters who were wise, compassionate, who used the language of the +human mind which you can understand, telling you, "Yes, there is a gradual growth." It +gives you courage and confidence and hope, and a possibility that it can happen to you +also. You cannot attain in a sudden explosion, but by and by, step by step, with your +limitations, with your weaknesses, you can grow to it. It may take many lives, but still +there is hope. You will just get heated by all your efforts. + +The second thing to remember: even hot water is still water. So even if you become more +clear in your mind, more pure in your perceptions, more moral, more centered, you are +still man, not a buddha, not enlightened. + +You become more silent, more still, calmer. You feel a deep bliss, but still you are a man, +and your feelings are really negative, not positive. + +You feel calm because you are now less tense. You feel blissful because now you are +clinging less to your miseries; you are not creating them. You feel collected. It is not that +you have come to realize the one, but only because now you are less divided. Remember +this: your growth is negative. You are just hot water. The possibility is there that at any +moment you will come to the point where evaporation happens. When it happens, you +will not feel calmness, you will not even feel blissful, you will not feel silent, because +these attributes are relative to their opposites. When you are tense, you can feel silence. +When you feel noise, you can feel stillness. When you are divided, fragmentary, you can +feel oneness. When you are in suffering, anguish, you can feel bliss. + +That is why Buddha was silent — because language cannot now express that which is +beyond polarities. He cannot say, "Now I am filled with bliss," because even this feeling +that "Now I am filled with bliss" is possible only with a background of suffering and +anguish. You can feel health only with a background of illness and disease; you can feel +life only with a background of death. Buddha cannot say, "Now I am deathless," because +death has disappeared so completely that deathlessness cannot be felt. + + +If the misery has disappeared so completely, how can you feel blissful? If the noise and +the anguish are so absolutely non-existent, how can you feel silence? All these +experiences, feelings, are related to their opposites. Without their opposites they cannot +be felt. If darkness disappears completely, how can you feel light? It is impossible. +Buddha cannot say, "I have become light!" He cannot say, "Now I am filled with light." +If he says such things, we will say he is not yet a buddha. He cannot utter such things. +Darkness must be there if you want to feel light; death must be there if you want to feel +deathlessness. You cannot avoid the opposite. It is a basic necessity for any experience to +exist. So what is Buddha’s experience? Whatsoever we know, it is not that. It is neither +negative nor positive, neither this nor that. And whatsoever can be expressed, it is not +that. + +That is why Lao Tzu insists so much that truth cannot be said, and the moment you say it +you have falsified it. Already it is untrue. Truth cannot be said because of this: it cannot + + + +be divided into polar opposites, and language is meaningful only with polar opposites. +Language becomes meaningless otherwise. Without the contrary, language loses +meaning. + +So there is a tradition which says that enlightenment is gradual, but that tradition is not +really the truth. It is just a half-truth uttered in compassion for human minds. + +Enlightenment is sudden, and it cannot be otherwise. It is a jump! It is a discontinuity +from your past! Try to understand: if something is gradual, the past goes on remaining in +it. If something is gradual, then there is a continuity. There is no gap. If from ignorance +to knowledge there is gradual growth, the ignorance cannot completely disappear. It will +remain, it will continue, because there has been no discontinuity, there has been no gap. +So the ignorance may become more polished, the ignorance may become more +knowledgeable. The ignorance may appear wise, but it is there. The more polished it is, +then, of course, the more dangerous. The more knowledgeable it is, then the more +cunning one is and the more capable of deceiving oneself. + +Enlightenment and ignorance are absolutely separate, discontinuous. A jump is needed — +a jump in which the past dissolves completely. The old is gone; it is no more, and the +new has appeared which was never there before. + +Buddha is reported to have said, "I am not that one who was seeking. The one who has +appeared now never was before." This looks absurd, illogical, but it IS so. It is so! +Buddha says, "I am not he who was seeking; I am not he who was desiring +enlightenment; I am not he who was ignorant. The old man is dead completely. I am a +new one. I never existed in that old man. There has been a gap. The old has died and the +new is born." + + +For the mind to conceive of this is difficult. How can you conceive of it? How can you +conceive of a gap? Something must continue. How can something disappear completely +and something new appear? It was absurd for logical minds, it was absurd for scientific +minds, just two decades before. But now, for science, it is not absurd. Now they say that +deep down in the atom electrons appear and disappear, and they take jumps. From one +point the electron takes a jump to another; in between the two it is not. It appears at point +A, then disappears and reappears at point B, and within the gap it is no more. It is not +there. It becomes absolutely non-existent. + +If this is so, it means that non-existence is also a sort of existence. It is difficult to +conceive of, but it is so: non-existence is also a sort of existence. It is as if something +moves from the visible to the invisible, as if something moves from form to formlessness. +When Gautam Siddharth, the old man who died in Gautam Buddha, was seeking, he was +a visible form. When the enlightenment happened, that fonn completely dissolved into +the formless. For a moment there was a gap; there was no one. Then from that +formlessness a new form arose. This was Gautam Buddha. Because the body continues in +the same way, we think that there is a continuity, but the inner reality changes +completely. Because the body continues in the same way, that is why we say "Gautam +Buddha" — that "Gautam Siddharth has now become Gautam the awakened; he has +become a buddha." + + +But Buddha himself says, "I am not he who was seeking. I am a totally different one." + +It is difficult for the mind to conceive of this — and for the mind many things are difficult, + + + +but they cannot be denied just because they are difficult for the mind. The mind has to +yield to those impossibilities which are incomprehensible to it. Sex cannot yield to the +mind; the mind has to yield to sex. This is one of the most basic inner facts — that +enlightenment is a discontinuous phenomenon. The old simply disappears and the new is +bom. + +There has been another tradition, a later tradition, of those who have been insisting all +through history that Enlightenment is sudden — that it is not gradual. But those who +belong to it are very few. They stick to the truth, but they are bound to be very few +because no following can be created if sudden Enlightenment is the case. You simply +cannot understand it, so how can you follow it? It is shocking to the logical structure and +it seems absurd, impossible. But remember one thing: then you move into deeper realms. +Whether of matter or of mind, you will have to encounter many things of which a +superficial mind cannot conceive. + +Tertullian, one of the greatest Christian mystics, has said, "I believe in God because God +is the greatest absurdity. I believe in God because mind cannot believe in God." It is +impossible to believe in God; no proof, no argument, no logic can help the belief in God. + +Everything goes against him, against his existence, but Tertullian says, "That is why I +believe — because only by believing in an absurdity can I move away from my mind." +This is beautiful. If you want to move away from your mind, you will need something of +which your mind cannot conceive. If your mind can conceive of it, it will absorb it into +its own system, and then you cannot transcend your mind. That is why every religion has +insisted on some point which is absurd. No religion can exist without some absurdity just +as a foundation in it. From that absurdity you either turn back and say, "I cannot believe +so I will go away." Then you remain yourself — or you take a jump, you turn away from +your mind. And unless your mind is killed the enlightenment cannot happen. + +Your mind is the problem, your logic is the problem, your arguments are the problem. +They are on the surface. They look true, but they deceive. They are not true. For example, +look how the mind's structure functions. The mind divides everything in two, and nothing +is divisible. Existence is indivisible; you cannot divide it — but mind goes on dividing it. + +It says that "this" is life and "this" is death. What is the actual fact? The actual fact is that +both are the same. You are both alive and dying this very moment; you are doing both. +Rather, you ARE both -death and life. + +Mind divides. + +It says, "this" is death and "this" is life. Not only does it divide; it says that both are +opposites, enemies, and that death is trying to destroy life. And it looks okay: death is +"trying to destroy life." But if you penetrate deeper, deeper than the mind, death is not +trying to destroy life! You cannot exist without death. Death is helping you to exist. It is +every moment helping you to exist. If for a single moment death stops working, you will +die. + +Death is every moment throwing away many parts in you which have become non- +functional. Many cells die; they are removed by death. When they are removed, new ones +are born. You are growing: something is dying and something is being born continuously. +Every moment there is death and life, and both are functioning. In language I have to call +them both two. They are not two; they are two aspects of one phenomenon. Life and +death are one; "life-death" is a process. But mind divides. That division looks okay for +us, but that division is false. + + + +You say "this" is light and "that" is dark; you divide. But where does darkness start and +where does light end? Can you demarcate them? You cannot demark them. Actually, +whiteness and blackness are two poles of a long greyness, and that greyness is life. On +one pole blackness appears and on another pole whiteness appears, but the reality is grey, +and that grey contains both in itself. + + +Mind divides and then everything looks clear-cut. Life is very confusing; that is why life +is a mystery. And because of this, mind cannot understand life. It is helpful to create +clear-cut concepts. You can think easily, conveniently, but you miss the very reality of +life. Life is a mystery, and mind demystifies everything. Then you have dead fragments, +not the whole. + +With the mind you will not be able to conceive of how enlightenment is sudden, how you +will disappear and something new will be there which you had never known before. But +don't try to understand through mind. Rather, practice something which will make you +more and more hot. Rather, try to attain some fire which will make you more and more +hot. And then one day suddenly you will know that the old has disappeared; the water is +no more. This is a new phenomenon. You have evaporated, and everything has changed +totally. + +Water was always flowing downwards, and after evaporation the new phenomenon is +rising upwards. The whole law has changed. You have heard about one law, Newton's +law of gravity, which says that the earth attracts everything downwards. But the law of +gravity is only one law. There is another law. You may not have heard about it because +science has yet to uncover it, but yoga and tantra have known it for centuries. They call it +levitation. Gravity is the pull downwards and levitation is the pull upwards. + + +The story of how the law of gravity was discovered is well known. Newton was sitting +under a tree, under an apple tree, and then one apple fell down. Because of this he started +thinking, and he felt that something is pulling the apple downwards. Tantra and yoga ask, +"How did the apple reach upwards in the first place? How?" That must be explained first +— how the apple reached the upward position, how the tree is growing upwards. The +apple was not there; it was hidden in a seed, and then the apple traveled the whole +journey. It reached the upward position and only then did it fall down. So gravity is a +secondary law. Levitation was there first. Something was pulling the apple upwards. +What is that? + +In life we easily know gravity because we are all pulled downwards. The water flows +downwards; it is under the law of gravity. When it evaporates, suddenly the law also +evaporated. Now it is under levitation, it rises upwards. + +Ignorance is under the law of gravity: you always move downwards, and whatsoever you +do makes no difference. You have to move downwards. In every way you will have to +move downwards, and struggle alone will not be of much help unless you enter a +different law — the law of levitation. That is what SAMADHI is — the door for levitation. +Once you evaporate, once you are no more water, everything changes. It is not that now +you can control: there is no need to control, you simply cannot flow downwards now. + + +As it was impossible before to rise upwards, now it is impossible to flow downwards. +It is not that a buddha tries to be non-violent; he cannot do otherwise. It is not that he + + + +tries to be loving; he cannot do otherwise. He has to be loving. That is not a choice, not +an effort, not any cultivated virtue, it is simply that now this is the law: he rises upwards. +Hate is under the law of gravity; love is under levitation. + +This sudden transformation doesn't mean that you are not to do anything and that you are +simply to wait for the sudden transformation. Then it will never come. This is the puzzle. +When I say — or someone else says — that enlightenment is sudden, we think that if it is +sudden nothing can be done that we must simply wait. When it will happen, it will +happen, so what can one do? If it is gradual you can do something. + +But I say to you that it is not gradual, and yet you can do something. And you have to do +something, but that something will not bring you enlightenment. That something will +bring you near the phenomenon of enlightenment. That something will make you open +for the phenomenon of enlightenment to happen. So enlightenment cannot be an outcome +of your efforts; it is not. Through your efforts you simply become available for the higher +law of levitation. Your availability will come through your effort, not enlightenment. You +will become open, you will become non-resistant, you will become cooperative for the +higher law to work. + +And once you are cooperative and non-resistant, the higher law starts functioning. Your +efforts will yield you, your efforts will make you more receptive. + +It is just like this: you are sitting in your room with closed doors. The sun is outside, but +you are in darkness. You cannot do anything to bring the sun in, but if you simply open +the doors your room becomes available. You cannot bring the sun in, but you can block it +out. If you open your doors, the sun will enter, the waves will come; the light will come +into the room. + +You are not really bringing the light, you are simply removing the hindrance. The light +comes by itself. Understand it deeply: you cannot do anything to reach enlightenment, +but you are doing many things to hinder it — to hinder it from reaching to you. You are +creating many barriers, so you can only do something negatively: you can throw the +barriers, you can open the doors. The moment the doors are open, the rays will enter, the +light will touch you and transform you. + +All effort in this sense is to destroy the barriers, not to attain enlightenment. All effort is +negative. It is just like medicine. The medicine cannot give you health; it can only +destroy your diseases. Once the diseases are not there, health happens; you become +available. If diseases are there, health cannot happen. + +That is why medical science, Eastern or Western, has not yet been able to define what +health is. + +They can define each disease exactly — they know thousands and thousands of diseases +and they have defined them all — but they cannot define what health is. At the most they +can say that when there is no disease you are healthy. But what is health? Something +which goes beyond mind. It is something which is there: you can have it, you can feel it, +but you cannot define it. + +You have known health, but can you define it — what it is? The moment you try to define +it you will have to bring disease in. You will have to talk something about disease, and +you will have to say, "No-disease is health." This is ridiculous. To define health you need +disease? And disease has definite qualities. Health also has its own qualities, but they are +not so definite because they are infinite. You can feel them; when health is there you +know it is there. But what is it? Diseases can be treated, destroyed. Barriers are broken + + + +and the light enters. Similar is the phenomenon of enlightenment. It is a spiritual health. +Mind is a spiritual disease, and meditation is nothing but medicine. + +Buddha is said to have said, "I am a medicine man, a VAIDYA — a physician. I am not a +teacher and I have not come to give you doctrines. I know a certain medicine which can +cure your diseases. And don't ask about health. Take the medicine, destroy the disease, +and you will know what health is. Don’t ask about it." + +Buddha says, "I am not a metaphysician, I am not a philosopher. I am not interested in +what God is, in what soul is, in what KAIVALYA, aloneness, MOKSHA, liberation, and +NIRVANA is. I am not interested! I am simply interested in what disease is and in how it +can be cured. I am a medicine man." His approach is absolutely scientific. He has +diagnosed human dilemma and disease. His approach is absolutely right. + +Destroy the barriers. What are the barriers? Thinking is the basic barrier. When you +think, a barrier of thoughts is created. Between you and the reality a wall of thoughts is +created, and thoughts are more dense than any stone wall can be. And then there are +many layers of thought. You cannot penetrate through them and see what the real is. You +go on thinking about what the real is and you go on imagining what the real is, and the +real is here and now waiting for you. If you become available to it, it will happen to you. +You go on thinking about what the real is, but how can you think if you don’t know? + +You cannot think about something which you don’t know; you can only think about +something which you already know. Thinking is repetitious, tautological; it never reaches +to anything new and u nk nown. Through thinking you never touch the unknown; you only +touch the known, and it is meaningless because you already know it. You can go on +feeling it again and again; you may enjoy the feeling, but nothing new comes out of it. + + +Stop thinking. Dissolve thinking, and the barrier is broken. Then your doors are open and +the light can enter. And once the light enters, you know that the old is no more. You +know now that that which you are is absolutely the new. It never was before, you had +never known it; but you may even say that this is the "ancient-most" — it was there +always, not known to you. + +You can use both expressions, they mean the same. You can call it the "ancient-most" — +the BRAHMAN who has always been there, and you can say that you were missing it +continuously. Or you can say that this is the most new — that which has happened only +now and never was before. That too is right because for you this is the new. If you want +to speak about the truth, you will have to use paradoxical expressions. The Upanishads +say, "This is the new and this is the old. This is the most ancient and this is the most new. +It is the far and the near both." But then language becomes paradoxical, contradictory. +And you ask me, "WHAT IS THIS GRADUAL GROWTH AND CLARITY IF THE +AUTHENTIC EXPERIENCE IS NEVER GRADUAL, BUT SUDDEN?" This clarity is +of the mind; this clarity is of a lessening of disease; this clarity is of the falling of +barriers. If one barrier falls you are less burdened, your eyes are less clouded. If another +barrier falls you are still more unburdened, your eyes become still more clear. + +But this clarity is not of enlightenment; this clarity is only of a lessening disease, not of +health. When all barriers disappear, with those barriers your mind also disappears. Then +you cannot say, "Now my mind is clear, it is no more." Then you simply say, "Now there +is no mind." + + + +When there is no mind, then the clarity is of enlightenment. Then the clarity is of +enlightenment! that is absolutely different. Then another dimension has opened. But you +will have to pass through clarities of mind. Remember always that no matter how clear +your mind becomes, it is still a barrier. No matter how transparent your mind becomes, +even if it becomes a transparent glass and you can look to the other side, still it is a +barrier and you will have to break it completely. So sometimes it happens that when one +is meditating one becomes more and more clear, more sane, more still; silence is felt. +Then one clings to meditation and thinks that everything is achieved. Great masters have +always been emphasizing that a day comes when you have to throw your meditation also. +I will tell you one story — one Zen story. Bokuju was meditating — meditating very +deeply, meditating with his whole heart. His master would come every day, and he would +just laugh and go back. Bokuju became annoyed. The master would not say anything, he +would just come and look at him, laugh and go away. And Bokuju was feeling very good +in meditation. + +His meditation was deepening, and he needed someone to appreciate him. He was +waiting for the master to pat him and say, "Good, Bokuju. You did well." But the master +just laughed. The laughter felt insulting — as if Bokuju was not progressing, and he was +progressing. As he progressed more, the laughter grew more and more insulting. It was +impossible to tolerate it now. + +One day the master came, and Bokuju was feeling absolutely silent as far as mind can go; +there was no noise within, no thought. The mind was absolutely transparent; no barrier +was felt. He was fdled with a subtle deep happiness, joy was bubbling all over, he was in +ecstasy. Thus, he thought, "Now my master will not laugh. Now the moment has come, +and he is going to tell me, 'Now Bokuju, you have become enlightened.'" + +That day the master came: the master came with a brick in his hand, and he started +rubbing that brick on the rock on which Bokuju was sitting. He was so silent, and the +rubbing of the brick created noise. He became annoyed. At last he couldn’t tolerate it, so +he opened his eyes and asked his master, "What are you doing?" + +The master said, "I am trying to make this brick a mirror, and by continuously rubbing it +I hope that someday this brick will become a mirror." + +Bokuju said, "You are behaving stupidly. This stone, this brick, is not going to become a +mirror. No matter how much you rub it, it is not going to become a mirror." + + +The master laughed and said, "Then what are you doing? This mind can never become +enlightened, and you go on rubbing and rubbing it. You are polishing it, and you are +feeling so good that when I laugh you feel annoyed." And suddenly, as the master threw +his brick, Bokuju became aware. When the master threw his brick, suddenly he felt that +the master was right, and the mind broke. Then from that day on there was no mind and +no meditation. He became enlightened. + +The master said to him, "Now you can move anywhere. Go, and teach others also. First +teach them meditation; then teach them non-meditation. First teach them how to make the +mind clear, because only a very clear mind can understand that now even this clear mind +is a barrier. Only a deeply meditative mind can understand that now even meditation has +to be thrown. + +You cannot understand it right now. Krishnamurti goes on saying that there is no need of +any meditation, and he is right. But he is talking to wrong persons. He is right; there is no + + + +need for any meditation, but he is wrong because of to whom he is saying this. Those +who cannot even understand what meditation is, how can they understand that there is no +need for any meditation? This is going to be harmful for them because they will cling to +this idea. They will feel that this idea is very good, there is no need of meditation, so "We +are already enlightened." + + +Listening to Krishnamurti, many feel that now there is no need of meditation and that +those who are meditating are foolish. They may waste their whole life because of this +thought, and this thought is right. There comes a point when meditation has to be thrown; +there comes a point when meditation becomes a barrier. But wait for this point to come. +You cannot throw something which you don't have. Krishnamurti says, "No need of +meditation; don't meditate." But you have never meditated, so how can you say, "Don't +meditate"? + +A rich man can renounce his riches, not a poor man. To renounce you need something to +renounce in the first place. If you meditate, you can renounce it one day — and that is the +last renunciation, and that is the greatest. Wealth can he renounced, it is easy. Family can +be renounced, it is not difficult. The whole world can be renounced because everything is +outer and outer and outer. The last thing is meditation, the innermost wealth. And when +you renounce it, you have renounced yourself. Then no self remains — not even the +meditating self, the great meditator. Even that image is broken. You have fallen into +nothingness. Only in this nothingness, the discontinuity. The old has disappeared and the +new has happened. You become available through meditation. + +Whatsoever is felt through meditation, don’t think that it is enlightenment. + +These are just glimpses of a lessening disease, of a dispersing disease. You feel good. + +The disease is less, so you feel relatively healthy. Real health is not yet there, but you are +more healthy than before and it is good to be more healthy than before. + +The second question: + +Question 2 + +"YOU SAID THAT LIFE EXISTS IN POLAR OPPOSITES LIKE LOVE AND HATE, +ATTRACTION AND REPULSION, VIRTUE AND VICE, ETCETERA. BUT WHAT +HAPPENS TO THESE POLAR OPPOSITES WHEN ONE IS IN THE WITNESSING +CONSCIOUSNESS?" + +Don't ask, wait for the happening, for what happens. You can ask and some answer can +be given, but that answer cannot become an authentic answer for you. And never jump +ahead. Don’t ask what happens when one dies. What happens? Whatsoever is said will be +meaningless because you are still alive. What happens when someone is dead? You will +have to pass through it. Unless you are dead you cannot know it. Whatsoever is said can +be believed on trust, but this is meaningless. + +Rather, ask how to be dead so that you can know what happens. No one else can die for +you; no one else's experience can be an experience for you. You will have to die. Death +cannot be another's experience for you, it has to be your own. Similar is the case here. +What happens when polarities disappear? In a way nothing happens. "Happening" +dissolves because all happening is polar. + + +When love and hate both dissolve — and they DO dissolve — , what happens? When you + + + +love, you hate also — and you hate the same person you love. Hate is just hidden, and +when hate comes up love goes down. + +Jesus says, "Love your enemies," and I say that you cannot do otherwise. You DO love +your enemies. You hate them so much, and without love that is impossible. Love is just +the other aspect of the coin. And where is the demarcation where love ends and hate +begins? There is just a grey extension. When do you hate someone and when do you +love? Can you demark it? You love and hate the same person; any moment hate can +become love and love can become hate. This is the polarity of mind, this is how mind +functions. Don’t become worried about it. If you know, you will never become worried. If +you love someone, you know hate will be there. If someone loves you, you will expect +both — love and hate. + +But what happens in a buddha-like consciousness when love and hate both disappear? +What happens? It is difficult to express what happens, but whatsoever has been felt +around Buddha is more like love without hate. It has been felt around Buddha; it is not +that Buddha feels it so. Buddha cannot feel love now because he cannot feel hate. He +cannot feel love, but around him everyone has felt a deep love flowing. We can describe +it as love without hate, but then the quality is different. + + +With our love, hate is inevitably present. It colors it, it changes the quality of it. Hate +gives a passion to love, a force, an intensity, a focused quality, a concentration, while +Buddha’s love becomes a dispersed phenomenon. Intensity is not there. It cannot burn +you, it can only warm you. It is not a fire, it is just a glow. It is not a flame, it is just like +the morning light when the sun has not yet risen and the night has disappeared. It is just +the moment of interval — light without any fire, without any flame. We have felt it as +love, and as the purest because there is no hate. Even to feel this type of love, you have to +be a very deeply meditative mind. You need a mind which can meditate; otherwise such a +delicate and diffuse phenomenon will not be felt. You have to be very deeply sensitive. +You can only feel gross love, and that grossness is given by hate. If someone simply +loves you without any hate, it will be difficult for you to feel his love. You will have to +grow to become more transparent, delicate, sensitive. You will have to become like a +very sensitive musical instrument; only then will the breeze sometimes come to you. And +the breeze is so non-violent now that it will not hit you. It will be just a delicate touch. If +you are very, very aware, you will feel it; otherwise you will miss it. + +But this is our feeling around a buddha, not Buddha’s feeling. + +Buddha cannot feel love or hate. Really, the polar opposites disappear, and simple +presence remains. Buddha is a presence, not a mood. You are moods, not a presence. +Sometimes you are hate, one mood, sometimes you are love — another mood; sometimes +you are anger, another mood, sometimes you are greed — another mood. You are moods, +you are never a pure presence, and your consciousness goes on being modified by your +moods. Each mood becomes the master. It modifies the consciousness, cripples it, +changes it, colors it, deforms it. + +A buddha is without moods. Now hate has gone, love has gone, anger has gone, greed +has gone — and non-greed also, non-anger also. They have disappeared! They both have +disappeared! He is a simple presence. If you are sensitive, you will feel love flowing +from him, you will feel compassion. If you are not sensitive, if you are gross, if your +meditation has not developed, you will not feel him at all. A buddha will move amidst + + + +you, and you will not even become aware that some phenomenon is passing — something +rare, something which passes only once in centuries. You will not become aware! + +Or, if you are very gross, anti-meditative, you will even become angered by his presence. +Because his presence is subtle, you may even become violent because of his presence. + +His presence may be disturbing to you. If you are very gross, anti-meditative, you will +become an enemy of a Buddha and he will not have done anything. + +If you are open, sensitive, you will become a lover, and he will not have done anything. +Remember this: when you become an enemy, it is you; when you become a friend, it is +you. A buddha is a simple presence, he is available. If you become an enemy, you turn +your back. You will simply miss something for which you may have to wait for lives to +come again. + +Ananda was weeping the day Buddha was passing away, and Buddha said in the +morning, "Now this is my last day. Now the body is going to be finished." Ananda was +near. He was the first to whom Buddha said, "This is my last day, so go and tell everyone +that if they have to ask something they can ask." + +Ananda started weeping and crying, so Buddha said, "Why are you weeping? For this +body? I have been teaching and teaching and teaching that this body is false, it is already +dead — or are you weeping for my death? Don’t weep, because I have died forty years +ago. I died the day I became enlightened, so this body is only disappearing now. Don’t +weep." + +Ananda said a beautiful thing. He said, "I am not weeping for your body or for you, I am +weeping for myself. I am yet unenlightened, and now how many lives will pass before +again a buddha will be available? And I may not be again able to recognize you." + +Unless you become enlightened, your clarity of mind can be clouded at any moment. +Before you become enlightened, you can fall back again and again. + +Nothing is certain. So Ananda said, "I am weeping for myself. I am yet unenlightened, I +have not yet reached the goal, and you are entering nothingness." + +Many, even Buddha’s own father, couldn't recognize that his son was no more his son — +that something had happened into this body which rarely happens. The darkness had +disappeared and the eternal light was burning there, but he couldn’t recognize it. Many +were against him; many tried to kill him. But it is all up to you: whether you become a +friend, a lover or an enemy depends on you, on your sensitivity, on your mind — how +your mind feels. + +But a buddha is not doing anything, he is simply a presence. Just by his presence much +happens around him. Those who can feel love, they will feel he is in deep love with them. +And the deeper you can feel, the more you will grow in the feeling that his love is +deepening towards you. If you can become a real lover, you will feel that a buddha is a +lover to you. If you become an enemy, and you feel hate, you will feel that a buddha is an +enemy and you will feel that he has to be killed, destroyed. It depends on you. A buddha +is a non-doer; he is simply being, he is there. So what happens is difficult to say because +whatsoever we say will be a mood. If we say he becomes a lover, that he has a great love, +it will be false. That will be our feeling. + +Jesus's followers felt that he was simply love and Jesus' enemies thought he had to be +crucified — so it depends on you. + + +It depends on you how you take it, how you are capable of taking it, how much open you + + + +are. But from the side of an enlightened one, nothing can he said. He can simply say that +now he is: without doing anything he is — just a presence, a being. + +The third question: + +Question 3 + +"YOU SAID THAT WHEN A PERSON IS TOTALLY IN THE PRESENT MOMENT +WITHOUT ANY THOUGHT IN THE MIND, THEN HE IS A BUDDHA-MIND. BUT +EVEN WHEN THERE IS NO THOUGHT IN ME AND I AM IN THE MOMENT, +ABSORBED, WITH NO PAST OR FUTURE, I DO NOT FEEL THE BUDDHA- +NATURE. PLEASE EXPLAIN WHEN IN THIS THOUGHTLESS AWARENESS THE +BUDDHA-MIND IS REVEALED." + +The first thing: if you are aware that there is no thought in your mind, there is thought. +Even this is a thought, that now there is no thought in you. This thought is the last +thought. Allow it also to disappear. And why are you waiting for when the buddha-nature +is going to happen to you? That again is a thought. It will not happen in that way — +never! + +I will tell you one story. One king came to Gautam Buddha. He was a devotee, a great +devotee, and he had come for the first time for his darshan — for his audience. In one of +his hands, in his left hand, he had one beautiful golden ornament, priceless, with many +jewels in it. It was the most precious that he had — a rare piece of art. He had come to +present it to Buddha just to show his devotion. + +He came near. In his left hand was that priceless jeweled ornament; he was going to +present it. Buddha said, "Drop it!" He was disturbed. He never expected this. He was +shocked. But because Buddha was saying "Drop it", he dropped it. + +In his other hand, in his right hand, he had brought a beautiful rose. He thought that +Buddha might not like stones. He might just think that this was a childish thing that he +had brought. But it was good to have an alternative, so he brought a beautiful rose. A rose +is not so gross, not so material. It has a spirituality, something of the unknown is there. +And Buddha might like it because he says life is flux, and the flower is in the morning +and in the evening it is no more. It is the most flux-like thing in the world. So he put his +other hand in front of Buddha and he wanted to present the flower. Buddha again said, +"Drop it!" Then he felt very disturbed. Now he had nothing to present. But when Buddha +again said to drop it, he dropped it. + +Then suddenly he became aware of the "I." He thought, "Why am I presenting things +when I can present myself?" When he became aware, with both his hands empty he +presented himself. But Buddha again said, "Drop it!" Now he had nothing to drop — just +empty hands — and Buddha said, "Drop it!" + +Mahakashyapa, Sariputta, Ananda and his other disciples were there, and they started +laughing. The man became aware that even to say that "I present myself to you" is +egoistic. + +Even to say, "Now I am here and I surrender to you," is not surrender. So he himself fell +down. Buddha smiled and said, "You understand well." + +Unless you drop even this idea of surrendering, unless you drop even this idea of empty +hands, it is not surrender. One has to drop even emptiness in the hand. It is easy to +understand the dropping of things... but then the hands were empty and Buddha said, +"Drop it! Don’t even cling to this emptiness!" When you do meditation, you have to drop + + + +thoughts. When thoughts are dropped, a thought remains and the thought is, "Now I have +become thoughtless." There is a subtle feeling, a thought that "Now I have achieved and +now there is no thought. Now the mind is vacant. Now I am empty." + +But this emptiness is filled with this thought. And whether thoughts are there or a thought +is there makes no difference. Drop the thought also. And why are you waiting for the +buddha-nature? YOU cannot wait because you will not be there. You will never meet +Buddha; when Buddha happens you will not be there, so your hopes are futile. You are +wasting time, you will not be there. + +Kabir has said, "When I was you were not. Now you are, and where has Kabir gone? +When I was seeking and seeking and desiring and hungering for you, you were not. I was +there. Now you are there, and please tell me where has Kabir gone? Where is that seeker +who was seeking and seeking and hungering and weeping and crying for you? Where has +that Kabir gone?" + +You will not be there when Buddha happens. + +So don’t wait, don’t desire, because your desire of "When will Buddha happen to me?" +and "When will I become a buddha-nature? When will I become enlightened?" -this very +desire will create a barrier, the last barrier. For the achieving of total freedom, the desire +for freedom is the last barrier. To be enlightened, even this desire for enlightenment has +to be thrown, has to be cast away. + +One of the great Zen masters, Lin-Chi, used to say, "If you meet Buddha anywhere, kill +him immediately! If you meet Buddha anywhere in your meditation, kill him +immediately!" He means it. This desire to be a buddha, to be enlightened, if you meet it +anywhere, kill it immediately. Only then does it happen. Total desirelessness is needed, +and when I say, "total desirelessness," I mean that even the desire for total desirelessness +must be dropped. You are, without any desire. You are, without any thought, not even +aware that there is no thought, that there is no desire. Then it happens. + +The last question: + +Question 4 + +"WHAT ARE THE POSSIBLE REASONS FOR NOT HAVING AN EXPLOSIVE +CATHARSIS? I CONSTANTLY, EVEN WITH TODAY’S SHAKTIPAT +MEDITATION, HAVE ONLY A VERY MILD CATHARSIS. DOES IT +NECESSARILY MEAN THAT I AM NOT OPEN OR NOT OPEN ENOUGH, OR ARE +THERE OTHER POSSIBLE REASONS? MY CONCERN OVER THIS THEN +BECOMES A DISTRACTION TO ME DURING THE MEDITATION AND AFTER." + +The first thing to be noted, to be remembered: catharsis will happen deeply if you just +help it to happen, if you just cooperate with it. + +Mind is so suppressed, and you have so much pushed things down, that to reach them +your cooperation is needed. So whenever you feel even a light catharsis, help it to +become stronger. Don’t just wait. If you feel that your hand is trembling, don’t just wait, +help it to tremble more. Don't feel, think that it has to be spontaneous, so you have to +wait. If it has to be spontaneous, then you will have to wait for years, because for years +you have been suppressing and the suppression was not spontaneous. You have done it +on purpose. + +You will have to do quite the opposite now. Only then can the suppressions be brought to +the surface. You feel like weeping; you weep mildly. Help it along! Make it a deep + + + +scream! You don't know that from the very beginning you have been suppressing your +crying, you have not cried really. From the very beginning the child wants to cry, to +laugh. The crying is a deep necessity in him. Through crying, every day he goes through +catharsis. + +The child has many frustrations. This is bound to be; it is of necessity. The child wants +something, but he cannot say what, he cannot express it. The child wants something, but +the parents may not be in a position to fulfill it. The mother may not be available there. +She may be engaged in some other work, and he may not be cared for. At that moment no +attention is paid to him, so he starts crying. The mother wants to persuade him, to console +him, because she is disturbed, the father is disturbed, the whole family is disturbed. + +No one wants him to cry, crying is a disturbance; everyone tries to distract him so that he +may not cry. We can bribe him. The mother can give him a toy; the mother can give him +milk — anything to create a distraction or to console him — but he should not cry. + +But crying is a deep necessity. If he can cry and is allowed to cry, he will become fresh +again; the frustration is thrown through crying. Otherwise, with a stopped crying, the +frustration is stopped. Now he will go on piling it up, and you are a "piled-up" cry. Now +psychologists say that you need "a primal scream." Now a therapy is developing in the +West just to help you to scream so totally that every cell of your body is involved in it. If +you can scream so madly that your whole body screams in it, you will be relieved of +much pain, much suffering that is accumulated. You will become just like a child — fresh +and innocent again. + +But that primal scream is not going to come suddenly. You will have to help it. It is so +deep down, and there are so many layers of repression, that don’t just wait: help it. When +you want to cry, cry wholeheartedly! Give total energy to it and enjoy it. Help it. And the +second thing — enjoy it, because if you are not enjoying what you are doing it cannot go +deep. It will be superficial. If you are screaming, then enjoy it. Enjoy the very thing; feel +good. If you are feeling somewhere that "What I am doing is not good; what will others +say? What a childish thing I am doing," even a slight feeling like this will become +repression. + +Enjoy it and be playful about it. Enjoy and be playful. Just inquire more and more +whether it can become deeper, whether you can help it along more — in what ways you +can help it along more. + +If you are sitting and crying, then maybe if you start jumping the cry will become deeper. +Or if you he down on the floor and start thrashing about maybe it will become deeper. +Try, help it along, and enjoy it — and you will feel there are many ways in which you can +help it along. Enjoy trying to deepen it, and once it takes over then you will not be +needed. Once it comes to the right source where energy is hidden, once you touch the +right source and the energy is released, then you are not needed. You can flow +automatically, spontaneously. And when it starts flowing spontaneously, you will be +cleansed completely. + +THE END. + + + +Chapter 41 : Be a witness not a judge + + +AT THE START OF SNEEZING, DURING FRIGHT, IN ANXIETY, ABOVE A +CHASM, FLYING IN BATTLE, IN EXTREME CURIOSITY, AT THE BEGINNING +OF HUNGER, AT THE END OF HUNGER, BE UNINTERRUPTEDLY AWARE. + +THE PURITY OF OTHER TEACHINGS IS AN IMPURITY TO US. IN REALITY, +KNOW NOTHING AS PURE OR IMPURE. + +Life is a paradox. To reach near you have to travel far, and that which is already achieved +you have to achieve again. Nothing is lost. Man remains natural, man remains pure, man +remains innocent; it is only that he forgets it. The purity is not disturbed, the innocence is +not destroyed. Only a deep forgetfulness is there. + +That which is to be achieved you are already. In essence, nothing new is to be achieved. +You have only to discover, uncover, unfold that which is already the case; hence, both +the difficulty of spiritual endeavor and the simplicity. I say "both".... It is very simple if +you can understand, but it is very difficult because you have to understand that which you +have completely forgotten, that which is so obvious that you never become aware of it, +that which is just like your breathing. It goes on continuously, uninterruptedly, but +because it goes on continuously, uninterruptedly, you need not be aware of it. Y our +awareness is not needed; it is not a basic requirement. You can forget it or you can +remember it: it is a choice. + +SANSARA and NIRVANA, the world and the liberated state of consciousness, are not +two things — just two attitudes, just two choices. + +You can choose either. You can be in the world because of a certain attitude, and the +same world becomes NIRVANA, the same world becomes absolute bliss, just by +changing the attitude. You remain the same, everything remains the same; just a change +of focus, a change of emphasis, a change of choice, is required. It is easy. Once absolute +bliss is achieved, you will laugh about it. Once it is known, you will not be able to +understand why you were missing it, how you could miss it. It was there always just +waiting to be looked at, and it was yours. + +A buddha laughs. Anyone who achieves it laughs because the whole thing seems to be +ridiculous. You were searching for something which was never lost. The whole effort +was absurd. But this happens only when you have achieved it, so those who have +achieved it say it is very simple. But those who have not achieved it, they say it is the +most arduous thing, the most difficult — really, not simply difficult, but the most +impossible thing. + +These methods which we will be discussing are told by someone who has achieved — +remember this. They will look too simple, and they are. To our minds things so simple +cannot be appealing — because if techniques are so simple and the abode is so near, if you +are already in it, if techniques are so simple and the home is so near, you will look +ridiculous to yourself. Then why are you missing it? Rather than feel the ridiculousness +of your own ego, you will think that such simple methods cannot help. + + +That is a deception. Your mind will tell you that these simple methods cannot be of any +help — that they are so simple, they cannot achieve anything. To achieve divine + + + +existence, to achieve the absolute and the ultimate, how can such simple methods be +used? How can they be of any help? Your ego will say that they cannot be of any help. +Remember another thing: ego is always interested in something which is difficult, +because when something is difficult there is a challenge, and if you can overcome the +difficulty your ego will feel fulfilled. The ego is never attracted towards anything which +is simple — never! If you want to give your ego a challenge, then you have to have +something difficult devised. If something is simple there is no appeal, because even if +you can conquer it there will be no fulfillment of the ego. In the first place, there was +nothing to be conquered, the thing was so simple. Ego asks for difficulties — some +hurdles to be crossed, some peaks to be conquered. And the more difficult the peak, the +more at ease your ego will feel. + +Because these techniques are so simple, they will not have any appeal to your mind. +Remember, that which appeals to the ego cannot help your spiritual growth. Only that +which has no appeal to your ego can be a help towards transformation. But this is what +happens: if some teacher says that this or that is very difficult, very arduous, that only +after lives and lives and lives will you have any possibility for any glimpse, your ego will +feel good. + + +These techniques are so simple that right now, here and now, the thing is possible. But +then there is no contact with your ego. If I say that right now, here, this very moment you +can achieve all that is possible to man, that you can become a Buddha or a Christ or a +Krishna in this very moment here and now without losing a single instant, then there will +be no contact with your ego. You will say, "This is not possible. I must go somewhere +else to search for it." And these techniques are so simple that you can achieve all that is +possible to human consciousness at any moment that you decide to achieve it. + +When I say that these techniques are simple, I mean many things. First, spiritual +explosion is not caused by anything; it is not a causal phenomenon. If it were caused by +something, then time would be needed, because time is necessary for the cause to take +place. And if time is needed, then it cannot be the case, it cannot happen this very +moment. Then you will have to wait for tomorrow or for another life. The next moment +will be needed. If anything is causal, then the cause has to take place, and then after the +cause the effect will follow,. and you cannot produce the effect right now without the +cause; time will be needed. But a spiritual happening is not a causal phenomenon. You +are already in that state; just a remembering is needed. It is not a causal phenomenon. + + +It is just like this: in the morning somebody has suddenly awakened you, and you cannot +recognize where you are. For a moment you may not even recognize who you are. In a +sudden awakening from deep sleep, you may not be able to recognize the place, the time, +but within a moment you will recognize. The more alert you will become, the more you +will recognize who you are, where you are and what has happened. This is not a causal +thing — just a question of alertness. With a growing alertness, you will recognize. + +All these techniques are for a growing alertness. You are already the person you long to +be, you are already where you want to reach. You have reached your home already. You +have never left it really. You have always been there, but dreaming, asleep. You can fall +asleep here and then you can dream, and in your dream you can move anywhere; you can +go to hell or to heaven or anywhere. + + + +Have you ever observed that whenever you are in your dream, one thing is certain? — that +you are never in the room in which you are asleep. Have you observed that fact? You can +be anywhere, but you will never be in the same room, on the same cot where you are. +Because you are already there, there is no need to dream about it. Dream means you have +to trek away. + +You may be sleeping in this room, but you will never dream of this room. There is no +need, you are already there. + +The mind desires something which is not, so the mind moves. It may go to London, to +New York, to Calcutta, to the Himalayas, to Tibet, to anywhere. It may go anywhere, but +it will never be here. It can be anywhere, but never here — and you are here. This is the +case. You are dreaming. Your divine existence is here; you are THAT. But you have +been trekking long.... And each dream creates a new sequence of dreaming. Each dream +creates new dreams, and you go on dreaming and dreaming and dreaming. + +All these techniques are just to make you alert so that you can come out of your dreams +back to the place where you have always been, to the state which you have never missed. +And you cannot miss it, it is your nature — it is SWABHAV. It is your very being, so +how can you miss it? These techniques are just to help your alertness to grow more, to +help it become more intense. With the intensity of awareness, everything changes. The +more intense the awareness, the less the possibility for dreaming; you become more and +more alert about the real. The less intense the awareness, the more you drift into +dreaming. So the whole phenomenon is that a non-alert state of mind is the world, and an +alert state of mind is NIRVANA. Non-alert, you are what you appear to be. Alert, you are +what you are. + +So the whole question is one of how to change your non-alert state of mind into an alert +state of mind, how to become more aware, how to get out of sleep and dreaming. + +That is why techniques can be of help. Even an alann clock can be of help — just an +artificial device, just an alann clock. But if the alarm goes on, it can help to bring you out +of your dreaming. But you can deceive it also; you can even dream about it, and then the +whole thing is falsified. When the alann goes, you can dream, you can make a dream +around the alarm also. You can dream that you have entered a temple and the bells are +going on. Now you have deceived the alarm. It could have broken your sleep, but you can +change it into dream itself; you can make it part of your dreaming. + +If you can make it part of your dreaming, if it can be absorbed into a dreaming process, +then it cannot help you. You can dream anything, and then it will not look like an alarm. + +It will have become something else. You have entered a temple and the bells are....; now +there is no need to wake up. You have changed the alann, the real thing, into a dream, +and a dream cannot be disturbed by another dream, it can only be helped. + +These techniques are all artificial in a way. They are just devices to help bring you out of +your dreaming state, but you can make them also part of your dream. Then you miss the +point. Then you MISS the point! Try to understand this because this is very basic. And +once understood, it will be helpful; otherwise you can go on deceiving yourself. + +For example, I say, "Take a jump into sannyas." + +That is just a device. Your old identity is broken; your old name becomes as if it belongs +to someone else. You can look at your past more detachedly. You can be a witness. You +are aloof, a distance is created. I give you a new name and a new robe just to create the + + + +distance. But you can make it part of your dreaming; then you will miss the whole point. +You can still think in terms of the old — that the old man. A, has taken sannyas. You feel, +"I have taken sannyas. " "I" remain the old. "I" have changed my robe, my name, but "I" +remain the old, .and the old continues. Now this sannyas is just something added to the +old. It is not discontinuous, it is continuous. If it is continuous, if YOU have taken +sannyas, you the old one, if YOU have changed your robe and name, you have missed the +point. + +You must be dead, you must not be the old now. You must feel that the old has died, that +this is a new entity which you never knew, that this is not a growth out of the old. This is +discontinuous with the old. Then the device will have helped. Then the alann will have +worked and the technique is useful. You are not missing the point. All these techniques +are such that you can miss or you can use them; it depends. But remember well, the +techniques are just techniques. If you understand the spirit, you may become alert even +without any technique. + +For example, the alarm clock may not be needed. + +Go deeply into it. Why do you need an alarm clock? If you want to get up early in the +morning at three, why do you need an alann clock? Deep down you know that you can +deceive yourself, and deep down you know that if you really want to get up at three, you +will get up at three and no clock is needed. But with the clock, the responsibility is put +off. Now you will not be responsible. Now if something goes wrong, the clock is +responsible. You can sleep with ease now. Now the clock is there; you can sleep without +any disturbance. + +But if you really want to get up early at three, you will get up early at three. No clock is +needed. This very intensity to get up will bring the happening. This will to get up at three +may be so intense, you may not be able to sleep at all, and there will be no need to get up; +you will already be awake the whole night. But to sleep well the clock is needed. Then +you can go to sleep. But you can deceive. When the alann goes off, you can deceive; you +can dream about it. + +These techniques are helpful only because your intensity is low. If you are really intense, +there is no need of any technique; you can be alert. But your intensity is not such. Even +with the technique you may start dreaming, and many possibilities are there. The first +possibility is that you will not believe that such simple techniques can be of any help. + +This is the first thing. + +Then there is no contact. Secondly, you may think that a very, very long process is +needed, that it will come gradually. But there are certain things that only happen +suddenly, they never come gradually. + +I am reminded that Mulla Nasruddin was asked to give his blessings to one of his +neighbor’s sons on his birthday. So he said, "Son, I hope you live One hundred and +twenty years plus three months." Everyone was wondering at this "plus three months." +The son asked, "But why? It is okay — one hundred and twenty years. Why plus three +months?" + +So Mulla Nasrudin said, "I would not like you to die so suddenly. Just one hundred and +twenty years, and suddenly you die? I would not like you to die so suddenly; that is why +plus three months." + +But even with "plus three months" you will die suddenly anyway. Whenever you are +going to die, you will die suddenly. Every death is a sudden death. No death is gradual + + + +because either you are alive or dead. There is no gradual process. One moment you are +alive and the next moment you are dead. There is no time process. + +Death is sudden; SAMADHI is also sudden. Spiritual explosion is also sudden. It is like +death. It is more like death than it is like life; it is sudden. It can happen at any moment. + +If you are ready, these techniques can be of help. They will not bring it gradually; really, +they will gradually bring you to be ready for the sudden happening. + +Remember this distinction: they are preparing you so that the sudden SAMADHI +happens. + +These techniques are not techniques for SAMADHI; they are techniques to prepare you, +and then SAMADHI happens. So how you use these techniques depends on you. So don’t +think that a very long process is needed, because that may be just a trick. The mind says a +very long process is needed so that you can postpone. You can say, "Tomorrow I will do +it or the day after tomorrow," and you can go on postponing forever. A postponing mind +goes on always postponing. It is not a question of whether you are going to do it +tomorrow; there is only a question because you are not going to do it today, that is all. +Tomorrow will again be a today, and the same mind will say, "Okay, I am going to do it +tomorrow." + +And, remember, you never postpone for years. You postpone for one day because if you +postpone for years you cannot deceive yourself. You say, "It is only a question of one +day. Just today I am not doing it; tomorrow I will do it." And the gap is so small that you +never feel you are postponing it forever. + +Tomorrow never comes, it is always today. And this mind which thinks in terms of +tomorrow will ALWAYS think in tenns of tomorrow. And it never comes, it has never +been, it will never be. All that you have is this very moment, so don’t go on postponing. +Now we will enter the techniques. + + +The first technique: + +"AT THE START OF SNEEZING, DURING FRIGHT, IN ANXIETY, ABOVE A +CHASM, FLYING IN BATTLE, IN EXTREME CURIOSITY, AT THE BEGINNING +OF HUNGER, AT THE END OF HUNGER, BE UNINTERRUPTEDLY AWARE." + +It looks so simple: at the start of sneezing, during fright, in anxiety or before hunger or +after hunger, "BE UNINTERRUPTEDLY AWARE." Many things have to be +understood. Very simple acts like sneezing can be used as devices, because howsoever +simple they look, they are very complex, and the inner mechanism is a very delicate +thing. Whenever you feel that a sneeze is coming become alert, and the sneeze may not +come at all. It may simply disappear, because a sneeze is a non-voluntary thing — +unconscious, non-voluntary. + +You cannot sneeze voluntarily; you cannot "will" it. How can you? How helpless man is! +You cannot "will" a single sneeze. Howsoever you may try, you cannot bring it out. A +single sneeze — such a small thing, but you cannot will it. It is non-voluntary; volition is +not needed. It does not happen because of your mind; it is because of your total organism, +your total body. + +And the second thing: when you become alert, when the sneeze is coming — you cannot +bring it, but when it is coming — if you become alert, it may not come, because you are +bringing something new to the process: the alertness. It may disappear, but when the + + + +sneeze disappears and you are alert, there is a third thing. + + +First, a sneeze is non-voluntary. You bring in a new thing — alertness. When the alertness +comes, the sneeze may not come. If really you are alert, it will not; it may not happen at +all. Then a third thing happens. The energy that was going to be released through a +sneeze, where does it move? It moves to your alertness. Suddenly there is a flash, a +lightning. You become more alert. The energy, that was going to be thrown by the sneeze +moves into alertness. Suddenly you become more alert. + +In that flash, in that lightning, even enlightenment is possible. That is why I say that these +matters are so simple, they look absurd. Their promise seems to be too much. Just +through sneezing, how can one become enlightened? But sneezing is not just sneezing; +you are totally involved in it. Whatsoever you do or whatsoever happens to you is a total +involvement. Observe again: whenever a sneeze happens, you are totally in it with the +whole body, the whole mind. It is not just your nose in which the sneeze is happening; +every fiber, every cell of your body is involved in it. A subtle trembling, a subtle +wavering goes all over the body, and with it the whole body becomes concentrated. And +when the sneeze has happened, the whole body relaxes. But it is difficult to bring +alertness to it. If you bring alertness to it, it will not happen, and if it happens you can +know that the alertness was not there. + +That is why you should be alert. + +"AT THE START OF SNEEZING...", because if it has started, nothing can be done. The +arrow has gone; you cannot change it now. The mechanism has started. The energy is on +its way to being released, it cannot be stopped. Can you stop a sneeze in the middle? + +How can you stop it in the middle? By the time you are ready, it has already happened. +You cannot stop it in the middle. + +Just at the beginning, become alert. The moment you feel the sensation that it is coming, +become alert. Close your eyes and be meditative. Bring your total consciousness to the +focus just where you are feeling the sensation of an oncoming sneeze. Just at the +beginning, remain alert. The sneeze will disappear, and the energy will be transfonned +into more alertness. And because in the sneeze the whole body is involved, the whole +mechanism is involved — it is a release mechanism and you are alert at this moment — +there will be no mind, there will be no thought, no meditation. + +In a sneeze, thinking stops. That is why so many people like snuff. It unburdens them, +their minds feel more relaxed because for a moment thinking stops. Snuff gives them a +glimpse of no-thinking. Through snuff, when the sneeze comes, they are not minds, they +become bodies. The head disappears for a single moment, but it feels good. + +If you become habituated to snuff, it is very difficult to leave it. + +It is more penetrating a habit than smoking; smoking is nothing before it. It penetrates +more deeply, because smoking is conscious and sneezing is unconscious. To leave snuff +is more difficult than to leave smoking. And smoking can be changed, substitutes can be +found — but there is no substitute for snuff, because, really, sneezing is a very unique +phenomenon in the body. + +The only other thing that can be compared and which has been compared is the sex act. +Those who think in terms of physiology, they say that the sex act is just sneezing through +the sex organ — and the similarity is there. It is not one hundred percent right because +much more is involved in sex, greater things are involved in it. But in the beginning, just + + + +in the beginning, the similarity is there. + +Something is thrown out from the nose and you feel relieved, and something is thrown +out from the sex organ and you feel relieved. And both are non-voluntary. You cannot +move into sex with will. If you try, you will be a failure — particularly men, because +man’s sex organ has to do something. It is active. You cannot "will" its act, and if you try, +then the more you try, the more it will be impossible. It can happen, but you cannot make +it happen. Because of this, in the West sex has become a problem. This half century in +the West sex knowledge has developed, and everyone has become so conscious about it +that the sex act is becoming more and more impossible. + + +If you are alert, sex will be impossible. If a man is alert while making love, the more he is +alert, the more it will be difficult. He will not be able to get an erection. It cannot be +willed, and if you will it you will lose it. The same method, the same technique, can be +used in sex. Just in the beginning, when you feel the sensation of an erection just coming +to you but it has not yet come, you just feel the vibration, become alert. The vibration +will be lost, and the same energy will move into alertness. + +Tantra has used this. It has tried in many ways. A beautiful naked woman will be there +just as an object for meditation, and the seeker, the meditator, will sit before the nude +woman meditating on her body, her fonn, her proportions, just waiting for the first +sensation in his sex center. The moment the sensation is there, be will close his eyes. He +will forget the woman. He will close his eyes, and he will become alert of the sensation. +Then sex energy is being transfonned into alertness. + +He is allowed to meditate on the nude woman only up to the point when the sensation is +felt. When he has to close his eyes and move to his own sensation and become alert there, +the same as is done in sneezing. And why does this flash happen? Because mind is not +there. The basic thing is that if the mind is not there and you are alert, you will have +SATORI, you will have the first glimpse of SAMADHI. + + +Thought is the barrier. So if thought disappears in any way, the thing will happen. But +thought must disappear; only then is alertness there. Thought can disappear even in sleep; +thought can disappear when you go unconscious; thought can disappear when you take +some drug. Thought disappears, but then there is no alertness to be aware of the +phenomenon that is hidden behind thought. So I define meditation as thoughtless +consciousness. You can become thoughtless and unconscious; then there is no meaning. +You can be conscious with thought; you are already that. + +Bring these two things together — consciousness and thoughtlessness. When they meet, +meditation happens, meditation is born. And you can try with very small things because +nothing is really small. Even a sneeze is a cosmic phenomenon. In existence, nothing is +great and nothing is small. Even a minute atom can destroy the whole world, and even a +sneeze, a very atomic phenomenon, can transfonn you. + +So don’t see things as small or big. There is nothing small and nothing big. If you have +the penetrating eye, then very small things are vital. Between atoms universes are hidden, +and between the universe and an atom you cannot say which is great and which is small. +Even a single atom is a universe in itself, and the greatest universe is nothing but atoms. +So don’t think in terms of great and small. Just try. + + + +Don’t say, "What can happen in a sneeze? I have been sneezing the whole life, and +nothing has happened." + +Bring in this technique: JUST "AT THE START OF SNEEZING, DURING FRIGHT...", +when you feel afraid and fear enters, just when you feel the fear enter, become aware and +fear will disappear. With alertness, there can be no fear. How can, you be afraid when +you are alert? You can be afraid only when you lose alertness. Really, a coward is not a +person who is afraid; a coward is a person who is asleep, and a brave man is a person +who can bring his alertness to the moments of fear. So fear disappears. + +In Japan, they train their warriors for alertness. The basic training is for alertness, and +everything else is secondary: swordsmanship, archery, everything is secondary. It is +known, it is said about the great Zen master Rinzai that he never succeeded — never +succeeded in his archery — to get to the right point, to the right aim. His arrow always +missed; it never reached to the right point. And he is known as one of the greatest +archers, so it is asked, "How is Rinzai known as the greatest archer when he never +succeeded in any aim and the point was always missed? His arrow never reached to the +right point, so how is he known as one of the greatest archers?" + +The followers of Rinzai say, "It is not the end, it is the beginning. We are not concerned +with the arrow reaching to the end, we are concerned with when the arrow starts its +journey. + +We are concerned with Rinzai. When the arrow leaves the bow, he is alert; that is all. It is +not the result, that is irrelevant." + +One man was a disciple to Rinzai. He was a great archer himself, he never missed his +aim, and then he came to Rinzai to learn, so someone said, "To whom are you going to +learn? He is not a master; he is not even a disciple. He is a failure, and you are a great +master and you are going to Rinzai to learn?" + +So that archer said, "Yes, because I have succeeded technically. But as far as my +consciousness is concerned, I am a failure. He is technically a failure, but as far as his +consciousness is concerned he is the archer and the master — because when the arrow +leaves he is alert, and that is the point." + +This archer who was a master technically had to learn, for years under Rinzai, and every +day he was one hundred percent accurate in his aiming. Rinzai would say, "No, you are a +failure. Technically the arrow leaves rightly. But you are not there, you are not alert. You +loose it in your sleep." + +In Japan they have been training their warriors to be alert first, and everything else is +secondary. A warrior is a brave man if he can be alert. And it was felt in the Second +World War that you cannot match Japan's warriors; their bravery is incomparable. From +where does it come? Physically they are not so strong, but in consciousness, in alertness, +fear cannot enter. + +They are not afraid, and whenever fear comes they will try Zen methods. + +This sutra says, "DURING FRIGHT, IN ANXIETY..." When you feel anxious, much +anxiety-ridden, try it. What is one to do? What do you ordinarily do when anxiety is +there? What do you do? You try to solve it. You try alternatives, and you get more and +more into it. You will create a bigger mess because anxiety cannot be solved through +thinking. It cannot be dissolved through thinking because thinking itself is a sort of +anxiety. So you help it to grow more. Through thinking, you cannot come out of it; you +will go deeper into it. This technique says don’t do anything with anxiety. Just be alert. + + + +Just be alert! + +I will tell you one old anecdote about Bokuju, another Zen master. He lived alone in a +cave, all alone, but during the day, or even in the night, he would sometimes say loudly, +"Bokuju" — his own name, and then he would say, "Yes, I am here." And no one else was +there. + +Then his disciples used to ask him, "Why are you calling 'Bokuju', your own name, and +then saying, 'Yes sir, I am here’?" + +He said, "Whenever I get into thinking, I have to remember to be alert, and so I call my +own name, 'Bokuju.' The moment I call 'Bokuju' and I say, 'Yes sir, I am here,’ the +thinking, the anxiety disappears." + +Then, in his last days, for two or three years, he never called "Bokuju," his name, and +never had to reply, "Yes sir, I am here." + + +The disciples asked, "Master, now you never do this." + +So he said, "But now Bokuju is always there. He is ALWAYS there, and there is no need. +Before I used to miss him. Sometimes the anxiety would take me, cloud me all over, and +Bokuju was not there. So I had to remember 'Bokuju,' and the anxiety would disappear." +Try your name. When you feel deep anxiety, just call Try this. This is a beautiful thing. +Try your name. When you feel deep anxiety, just call your name — "Bokuju" or any +name, but your name — and then reply to it, "Yes sir, I am here," and feel the difference. +Anxiety will not be there. At least for a single moment you will have a glimpse beyond +the clouds, and that glimpse can be deepened. Once you know that if you become alert +anxiety is not there, it disappears; you have come to a deep knowing of your own self and +the mechanism of inner working. + +"... Above a chasm, flying in battle, in extreme curiosity, at the beginning of hunger, at +the end of hunger, be uninterruptedly aware." + +You can use anything. Hunger is there, become alert. What to do when you feel hunger is +there? What has happened? When you feel hunger you never see it as something +happening to you. You become the hunger. You feel, "I am hungry." The real feeling is +that "I am hunger," but you are NOT hunger; you are only conscious of it. It is something +happening on the boundary. + +You are the center, you have become aware of it. It is an object. You remain the subject, +you are a witness. You are not hunger; hunger is happening to you. You were there when +hunger was not and you will be there when hunger will have gone. So hunger is an +accident; it happens to you. + +Become alert, then you will not be identified with it. If you feel hunger, become alert that +hunger is there. Look at it, encounter it, face it. What will happen? The more you become +alert, the farther away will the hunger be felt; the less alert, the nearer. If you are not +alert, exactly at the center you will feel, "I am hunger." If you become alert, hunger is +thrown away. Hunger is there, you are here. Hunger is an object, you are a witness. +Fasting has been used only because of this, for this technique. Fasting in itself is of no +use. If you are not doing this technique with the hunger, fasting is foolish — just foolish, +of no use. Mahavira used fasting with this technique, and Jainas have been simply using +fasting without this technique. Then it is foolish. You are just destructive, and it cannot +be of any help. You can be hungry for months and identified with hunger, feeling that "I +am hungry." It is useless, harmful. There is no need to go on a fast. Every day you can + + + +feel it, but there are problems. That is why fasting may be helpful. + +Ordinarily, we stuff ourselves with food before we feel hunger. + +In the modern world there is no need to feel hunger. You have a time fixed for your +meals, and you take them. You never ask whether the body is feeling hungry or not; at a +fixed hour you take your meals. Hunger is not felt. You may say, "No, when it is one +o’clock I feel hungry." That may be a false hunger; you feel it because it is one o'clock, +your time. Someday you can play a trick. Tell your wife or your husband to change the +clock. It is twelve, and the clock will show that it is one. You will feel hunger. Or it is +already one hour fast: it is two exactly, and the clock shows one; then you will feel +hunger. You look at the clock, and you feel hunger. This is artificial, false, it is not real. +So fasting may be helpful. If you fast, then for two or three days you will feel a false +hunger. Only after the third or fourth day will real hunger be felt; your body will demand, +not the mind. When mind demands, it is false. When the body demands, it is real. And +when it is real and you become alert, you become totally different from your body. +Hunger is a body phenomenon. Once you can feel that hunger is different from you and +you are a witness to it, you have transcended the body. + +But you can use anything, these are just examples. This technique can be used in many +ways; you can devise your own way. But insist on one thing: if you are trying with +hunger, then go on at least for three months with hunger. + +Then only will you be disidentified with your body someday. Don’t change the device +every day because a deepening is needed with any technique. + +So choose anything for three months. Stick to it, apply the technique, go on working with +it, and always remember to be aware in the beginning. In the middle it will be very +difficult, because once the identity is felt that YOU are hungry, you cannot change it. + +You can get changed mentally. You can say, "No, I am not hunger, I am a witness." That +is false. This is the mind talking, this is not a feeling experience. Just try to be aware in +the beginning, and, remember, you are not to say that "I am not hunger." This is how +mind can deceive. You can say, "The hunger is there, but I am not hunger. I am not body, +I am the BRAHMAN." You are not to say anything. Whatsoever you say will be false +because you are false. + +This chanting that "I am not the body" will not help. You go on saying "I am not the +body" because you know that you are body. If you really know that you are not the body, +what is the use of saying "I am not the body"? There is no use, it will look stupid. Be +aware, and then the feeling that "I am not the body" will be there. This will not be a +thought, this will be a feeling. This will not be felt in the head, this will be felt all over +your being. You will feel the distance — that the body is far away, that "I am absolutely +different." + +And there is not even a possibility of mixing both. Y ou cannot. The body is the body; it is +matter, and you are consciousness. They can live together, but they never mix. They +cannot become mixed. + +The second technique: + +"THE PURITY OF OTHER TEACHINGS IS AN IMPURITY TO US. IN REALITY, +KNOW NOTHING AS PURE OR IMPURE. + +This is one of the basic messages of tantra. It is very difficult to conceive of it because it + + + +is absolutely non-ethical, non-moral. I will not say immoral because tantra is not +concerned with morality or immorality. Tantra says it is irrelevant. This message is to +help you to grow beyond purity and impurity, beyond division really, beyond dichotomy, +duality. Tantra says, existence is non-dual, it is one, and all distinctions are man-created +— all distinctions, remember. Distinctions as such are man-created. Good-bad, pure- +impure, moral-immoral, virtue-sin: all these concepts are man-created. They are attitudes +of man; they are not real. What is impure and what is pure? It depends on your +interpretation. What is immoral and what is moral? It depends on your interpretation. +Nietzsche has said somewhere that all morality is interpretation. So something can be +moral in this country and immoral in the neighboring country, something can be moral to +a Mohammedan and immoral to a Hindu, moral to a Christian and immoral to a Jaina. + +Or something can even be moral to the older generation and immoral to the younger +generation. It depends; it is an attitude. Basically, it is a fiction. The fact is simply the +fact. The naked fact is simply the fact; it is neither moral nor immoral, pure nor impure. +Think of the earth without human beings. Then what will be pure and what will be +impure? Everything will be — simply "be." Nothing will be pure and nothing will be +impure; nothing will be good and nothing will be bad. With man, mind comes in. Mind +divides. It says "this" is good and "that" is bad. This division not only creates a division +in the world; this division creates a division in the divider also. If you divide, you are also +divided in that division, and you cannot transcend your inner division unless you forget +outer divisions. Whatsoever you do to the world, you have done to yourself also. + +Naropa, one of the greatest masters of Siddha Yoga, says, "An inch division, and hell and +heaven are set apart" — an inch division! But we go on dividing; we go on labeling, +condemning, justifying. Look at the bare fact of existence and don’t label it. Only then +can tantra's teachings be understood. Don’t say good or bad; don’t bring your mind to the +fact. The moment you bring your mind to the fact, you have created a fiction. Now it is +not a fact, it is not a reality: it is your projection. This sutra says, "THE PURITY OF +OTHER TEACHINGS IS AN IMPURITY TO US. + +IN REALITY, KNOW NOTHING AS PURE OR IMPURE." + +"THE PURITY OF OTHER TEACHINGS IS AN IMPURITY TO US:" Tantra says, +"What is very pure for other teachings, a virtue, is a sin for us, because their concept of +purity divides. For them something becomes impure." + +If you call a man a saint, you have created the sinner. Now you will have to condemn +someone somewhere because the saint cannot exist without the sinner. And look now at +the absurdity of our efforts: we go on trying to destroy sinners, and we conceive of and +hope for a world where there will be no sinners — only saints. This is nonsense because +saints cannot exist without sinners. They are the other aspect of the same coin. You +cannot destroy one aspect of the coin, they both will exist. Sinners and saints are both +part and parcel of one thing. If you destroy the sinners, saints will disappear from the +world. But don’t be afraid; let them disappear because they have not proved to be of any +worth. + +Sinners and saints are both part of one interpretation, of one attitude towards the world, +in which one says, "This is good and that is bad." And you cannot say that "This is good" +unless you say that "That is bad." The bad is needed to define the good. So the good +depends on the bad, your virtue depends on sin, and your saints are impossible; they +cannot exist without the sinners. So they must be grateful to the sinners; they cannot exist + + + +without them. + + +In relation to them, in comparison to them, howsoever much they condemn the sinners, +they are part and parcel of the same phenomenon. Sinners can disappear from the world +only when saints disappear — not before that; and sin will not be there when there is no +concept of virtue. + +Tantra says that the fact is real and the interpretation is unreal. Don’t interpret. "IN +REALITY, KNOW NOTHING AS PURE OR IMPURE." Why? Because purity and +impurity are OUR attitudes imposed on reality. Try this. This technique is arduous, not +simple — because we are so much oriented towards dual thinking, based, rooted in dual +thinking, that we are not even aware of our condemnations and justifications. If someone +starts smoking here, you may not have consciously felt anything, but you have +condemned. Deep down within you, you have condemned. Your look may have +condemned or no look may have condemned. You may not have looked at the person, +and you have condemned. + +This is going to be difficult because the habit has become so deep-rooted. You go on — +just by your gestures, your sitting, your standing — you go on condemning, justifying, not +even aware of what you are doing. When you smile at a person or when you don’t smile +at a person, when you look at someone or you don’t look, you just ignore someone, what +are you doing? You are imposing your attitudes. You say something is beautiful; then +you will have to condemn something as ugly. + +And this dual attitude is simultaneously dividing you, so within you there will be two +persons. + +If you say that someone is angry and anger is bad, what will you do when you will feel +angry? You will say that this is bad, then there will be problems because you say that +"This is bad: this anger in me is bad." Then you have started to divide yourself into two +persons — a bad person, an evil person within, and a good person, a saint. Of course, you +are bound to be identified with the saint within, so the devil, Satan, the evil within you is +to be condemned. You are divided in two. Now there will be a constant fight, a conflict. +Now you cannot be an individual; you will be a crowd, a house divided against itself. +Now there will be no peace, no silence. You will feel only tensions and anguish. This is +what you are feeling, but you don’t know why. + +A divided person cannot be at peace. How can he be? Where to put your devil? You have +to destroy it, and it is you; you cannot destroy it. You are not two. The reality is one, but +because of your divisive attitude you have divided the outer reality. Now the inner is also +divided accordingly — so everyone is fighting with himself It is as if you are fighting +against one hand — fighting the right hand with the left hand — and the energy is one. In +my right hand and left hand, I am; I am flowing in both. But I can oppose one against the +other, my right hand against my left hand, and I can create a conflict, a bogus fight. + +Sometimes I can deceive myself that the right hand has won, and now the left is down. +But this is a deception, because I know that it is me in both and any moment I can put the +left up and the right down. I am in both; both the hands are mine. + +So howsoever much you think you have put your saint above and crushed the devil down, +know that at any moment you can change the positions, and the saint will be down and +the devil will be up. That creates fear, insecurity, because you know that nothing is +certain. You know you are so loving this moment and you have crushed your hatred + + + +down, but you are afraid because at any moment the hatred can come up and the love will +be just crushed down. And it can happen at any moment because you are within both. +Tantra says don’t divide, be undivided; only then will you be victorious. How to be +undivided? You don’t condemn, don’t say "this" is good and "that" is bad. Just withdraw +all conceptions of purity and impurity. Look at the world, but don’t say what it is. Be +ignorant, don’t be too much wise. Don't label, remain silent, non-condemnatory, non- +justifying. If you can remain silent about the world, by and by this silence will penetrate +within. And if the division is not there outwardly, the division will disappear from the +inner consciousness, because both CAN exist together. + +But this is dangerous for society. That is why tantra was suppressed. + +This is dangerous! Nothing is immoral, nothing is moral; nothing is pure, nothing is +impure. Things are as they are. A real tantric will not say that a thief is bad; he will say +that he is a thief; that is all. And by using the word 'thief there is no condemnation in his +mind. This "thief is just a fact, not a condemnation. If someone says that "Here is a man +who is a great saint," he will say, "Okay! He is a saint." But there is no evaluation in it. + +He will not say, "He is good", he will say, "Okay! He is a saint and that man is a thief," +just like this is a rose and that is not a rose, this tree is high and that tree is low, night is +dark and day is light — but without comparison. + +But this is dangerous. Society cannot exist without condemning one thing and without +appreciating the other — society cannot exist! Society exists on duality. That is why tantra +was suppressed. It was thought to be anti-social, but it is not. It is not! But that very +attitude of non-duality is transcendental. It is not anti-society, it is transcendental; it is +beyond society. + +Try this. Just move in the world without any values, just with natural facts: someone is +this, someone is that. And then, by and by, you will feel a non-division within yourself. +Your polarities will be coming together, your "bad" and your "good" will be coming +together. They will merge into one, and you will become one unity. + +There will be nothing as pure, nothing as impure. Know the reality. + +"THE PURITY OF OTHER TEACHINGS IS AN IMPURITY TO US:" Tantra says that +"What is basic for others is poisonous for us." For example, there are teachings which are +based on non-violence. They say violence is bad, non-violence is good. Tantra says that +non-violence is non-violence, violence is violence; nothing is good and nothing is bad. +There are teachings which are based on celibacy — BRAHMACHARYA. They say that +BRAHMACHARYA is good, sex is bad. Tantra says sex is sex, BRAHMACHARYA is +BRAHMACHARYA. One is a BRAHMACHARI and one is not. But these are simple +facts, no values are attached to them. And tantra will never say that BRAHMACHARYA +is good — the celibate is good — and that the one who is in sex is bad. Tantra will not say +that. Tantra accepts things as they are. And why? Just to create a unity within you. + +This is a technique to create a unity within you, to have a total existence within, +undivided, non-conflicting, not opposed. Only then is silence possible. One who is trying +to move to some place against something can never be at peace. How can he be? And one +who is divided within himself, fighting with himself, how can he win? It is impossible. +You are both, so who is going to win? No one is going to win, and you will be at loss +because you will dissipate your energy in fighting unnecessarily. + + +This is a technique to create a unity in yourself. Allow valleys to disappear; don’t judge. + + + +Jesus says somewhere, "Judge ye not so that ye may not be judged." But this was +impossible for the Jews to understand, because the whole Jewish conception is morality +oriented: "This is good and that is not good." Jesus in his teaching, "Judge ye not," is +talking in terms of tantra. If he was murdered, crucified, it is because of this. He had a +tantra attitude — "Judge ye not." + +So don’t say that a prostitute is bad — who knows? and don’t say that a puritan is good. +Who knows? And ultimately they both are part of one game. They are based on each +other — on a mutual existence. So Jesus says, "Judge ye not," and this is what this sutra +means: "Judge ye not so that ye may not be judged." + +If you are non-judging, not taking any moral standpoint, simply observing facts as they +are, not interpreting them according to yourself, then you cannot be judged. You are +transformed completely. Now there is no need for YOU to be judged by any divine +power — there is no need! You have become divine yourself; you have become God +yourself. Be a witness, not a judge. + +THE END. + + + +Chapter 42: Alertness through tantra -- not principles + + +The first question: + +Question 1 + +"IS IT NOT TRUE THAT AN IMMORAL LIFE CREATES HINDRANCES IN +MEDITATION?" + +What is meditation? It is not your character, it is not what you do. It is what you are. It is +not the character, it is the consciousness that you bring to whatsoever you do. The doing +is irrelevant. Whether you are doing it consciously or not is the question, whether moral +or immoral. Are you alert? If you are alert, meditation happens. If you are not alert, you +live in sleep. + +You can be moral while fully asleep, there is no problem. Rather, it is better to be moral +if you want to be fully asleep because then society will not disturb you. Then no one will +be against you. You can sleep conveniently. The society will help you. + +You can be moral without being meditative, but the immorality will always be just +behind you. Just like a shadow it will follow, and your morality will be just skin deep +because your morality can only be imposed from without when you are asleep. It can +only be pseudo, false, a facade, it cannot become your being. You will become moral +outwardly, but inwardly you will remain immoral. And the more moral you become +outwardly, the more immoral you will be within — in the same proportion, because your +morality is bound to be nothing but a deep suppression. You cannot do anything else +while asleep; you can only suppress. + + +And through this morality you will also become false. You will not be a person, but +simply a "persona" — just a pseudo entity. Misery will follow, and you will consequently +be on the verge of explosion — explosion of all that you have suppressed. It is there +waiting for you. And if you are really honest in being moral while asleep, you will go +mad. Only a dishonest person can remain moral without being mad. That is what +hypocrisy means. Hypocrites just show that they are moral, that they are not, and they +find ways and means to be immoral, constantly remaining moral on the surface or +pretending to be moral. Then only can you remain sane; otherwise you will go insane. +This so-called morality leaves only two alternatives. If honest, you will become insane; if +dishonest, you will become a hypocrite. So those who are clever, cunning, they are +hypocrites. Those who are simple, innocent, who become victims of such teachings, go +mad. + +While asleep, real morality cannot happen to you. And what do you mean by "real +morality"? Something which is a spontaneous flowering out of your being, not imposed +from without. And real morality is not in opposition to immorality; a real morality is just +an absence of immorality, it is not in opposition. For example, you can be taught to love +your neighbors, to love everyone, to be loving. It can become a moral attitude, but the +hate remains within. + +You force yourself to be loving, and a forced love cannot be real, cannot be authentic. It +is not going to fulfill either you or the other person whom you love. No one is to be +fulfilled by this false love. + + + +It is just like false water. No one's thirst can be quenched by it. The hatred is there, and +the hatred is trying to assert. And a false love cannot be a real hindrance to it. Rather, the +hatred will penetrate the false love and will even poison it, and your loving will become +just a sort of hatred. It is very tricky and cunning. + +A real morality happens to a person who has gone deep within himself — and the deeper +you move, the more loving you become. It is not something forced against hatred; it is +not something antagonistic to hatred. The deeper you move, the more love flows out of +you. It has nothing to do with hatred at all; it is not concerned with hatred at all. The +moment you reach to your center, you are loving without any moral imposition. You may +not even be aware that you are loving. How you can be aware? This love will just be so +natural that it will be just like breathing, just like your shadow following you. You will +simply be loving. + +Tantra teaches the inner journey. Morality will happen, but that will be a consequence, +not a prerequisite. Be clear about this distinction. Tantra says don’t be entangled with +moral and immoral concepts. + +They are outer. Rather, move within. So the techniques are there for how to move within. +And don’t be concerned with moral and immoral, pure and impure; don’t be concerned +with distinctions. Just move within. Forget the outer — the outer world, the society and +whatsoever the society has taught you. All that society teaches is bound to be dualistic, it +is bound to be suppressive; it is bound to be a conflict within you. And if the conflict is +there, you cannot move within. + +So forget the conflict and forget all that creates conflict. Simply move within. The deeper +you go, the more moral you will become, but that morality will not be the morality of the +society. You will be moral without "being moral" — without being conscious that you are +moral, because there is nothing opposed to it within you. You are simply loving because +you feel blissful when you are loving. It is a bliss in itself. There is no end to it; no result +is needed. It is not that you will get into the kingdom of God if you love. It is not a +bargain. The morality that society preaches and so-called religions preach is a bargain: +"Do this and you will get that. If you don't do this you will not get that. You will even be +punished. "It is a bargain. + +Tantric morality is not a bargain, it is a happening. The deeper you move, the more you +start living in the moment. You feel that to love is bliss. It is not a step, a condition, a +bargain towards something else; it is enough unto itself. + +You love because you feel blissful in loving. You are not doing anything for your +neighbor; you are not obliging anyone else. It is a pleasure to be loving. It is good for you +right here and now. There is no future heaven or hell. Just now it creates the heaven, and +the kingdom of God enters you. And this happens with all the virtues; they flower +spontaneously. + +Now look at the question: "IS IS NOT TRUE THAT AN IMMORAL LIFE CREATES +HINDRANCES IN MEDITATION?" Really, the contrary is the truth. A meditative life +creates hindrances in immoral life. Immoral life cannot create any hindrances. Immoral +life means that you are non-meditative — nothing else; you are fast asleep. That is why +you are doing hann to yourself. + +For tantra, the basic thing is meditation, alertness, awareness. Nothing else is more basic +than that. When someone is immoral, it shows that he is not alert. It is just a symptom. +The immoral life is just a symptom that he is not alert. What is ordinary teaching doing? + + + +Ordinary teachers will tell to this sleeping man who is immoral to be moral. He may +change from immorality to morality, but the sleep continues. + +So the whole effort is wasted because the real disease was not immorality; immorality +was just a symptom. The disease was non-alertness, non-meditativeness. That is why he +was immoral. You can convert him to morality. You can create fear, and you can make +afraid only that person who is asleep; otherwise you cannot create fear. + +You can create a fear about hell and you can create a profit motive for heaven. Both of +these things are possible only while you are asleep. If you are not asleep, you cannot be +threatened and you cannot be motivated because of profit. Those two things are +meaningful only to the mind that is asleep. + +So create the fear of punishment, and a person will move from immorality to morality — +but he will move because of fear. Create a profit motive, and then he can move from +immorality to morality — but he will move because of lust, greed, profit motivation. + +Greed and fear are part of the sleeping mind. He remains asleep, nothing basic is +changed. + +He is good for the society; that is okay. For the society the immoral person is a problem, +but the moral person is not a problem. So society has solved its problems, but the man +remains asleep. For himself, nothing is solved; he is now more convenient for the society. +Previously, he was inconvenient. Try to observe the fact: an immoral person is +inconvenient to the society, but he is convenient for himself. A moral person becomes +convenient to the society, but he becomes inconvenient to himself. + +So it is only that the coin is put upside down. That is why immoral persons look more +happy and gay, and a moral person is serious, sad, burdened. The immoral person is +fighting with the society and the moral person is fighting with himself. + +The immoral person feels worried only because there is always a fear of being caught. He +is afraid of being caught, but he is enjoying. If no one catches him, if there is no fear of +being caught, he is okay. + +The moral person is caught in a struggle with himself. Nothing is okay with him; he is +only okay with the society. Morality is a lubricant, it helps you to move easily with +others. But then you become uneasy with yourself. Uneasiness remains either with the +society or with yourself. Only when you become awakened does uneasiness leave you. +Tantra is concerned with the basic disease, not with the symptoms. Morality is removing +symptoms. So tantra says don’t be concerned with moral or immoral concepts. It does not +mean that tantra says become immoral. How can tantra tell you to become immoral when +tantra cannot even tell you to become moral? Tantra says the whole thing is irrelevant: +don’t talk about morality and immorality; come to the root. You can be moral or immoral, +but that is only the symptom. Come to the root! The root is that you are asleep — fast +asleep. + +How to break this sleeping pattern? How to be aware and how not to fall again and again +into sleep? That is what tantra is concerned with — and once you become alert your +character will change. But that is a consequence. Tantra says you need not worry about +it.; that is a consequence. Inevitably, it happens, so you need not worry about it. + +You are not to bring it, it will happen. You simply become more and more alert, and you +will be less and less immoral. But this morality that will happen to you is not forced; it is +not something done by you on your part. You are just trying to be alert, and it happens. + + + +How can an alert man be violent? How can an alert man feel hatred and anger? It may +look paradoxical, but it is so. One who is asleep cannot be without hatred. It is +impossible. He can only pretend that there is no anger, no hatred. He can only pretend +that there is love, compassion, kindness, sympathy. Those are all pretensions. Quite the +contrary happens to the one who has awakened. If anger is needed, he can only pretend. +He cannot be angry.; he can only pretend! If anger is needed — and sometimes it is +needed — he can only pretend. He cannot be sad, but if it is needed he can pretend that he +is sad. Now these are impossible. + +Love is natural now, as hatred was before. Love was a pretension before. Now hatred can +only be a pretension — if it is needed. Jesus fighting with the moneychangers in the great +temple was pretending. He cannot be angry, but he has chosen to pretend. He cannot be +really angry. He cannot be angry, but he can use anger — as you use love and cannot be +loving. + +You use love for certain purposes. Your love is just to get something else; it is never +simply love. You may be trying to get money, you may be trying to get sex, you may be +trying to get something — ego fulfillment, a victory, a feeling that you are very powerful. + +You may be trying to get anything else, but it is never love. + +A buddha can be angry if he thinks that it is going to help. Because of his love sometimes +he may be angry, but that is only a pretension and only fools are befooled by it. Those +who know, they will simply laugh. As meditation deepens, says tantra, you start +changing. And it is beautiful when change happens to you. If you "do" it, it can never be +something very deep because doing is just on the surface. So tantra says, allow it to +happen from the being, from the very center. Let it flow from the center towards the +periphery; don’t force it from the periphery to the center. That is impossible. + +Tantra will not say moral or immoral. The only thing is if you are asleep try to change it. +Allow yourself to become more and more alert, wherever you are. If you are immoral, +tantra says, "It is okay. We are not concerned with your immorality, we are concerned +with your sleep and with how to transform it into alertness." Don't fight with the +immorality. Just try to transform your sleep. + +If you are moral it is okay. Tantra is not going to tell you first to become immoral and +then to try. Neither does the immoral one have any need to transform himself into a moral +person, nor does the moral person have to transform himself into an immoral one in order +to get into meditation. All that they need is to change their quality of consciousness. + +So wherever you are, a sinner or a saint, for tantra there is no distinction. If you are +asleep, then try the techniques for alertness. And don’t try to change symptoms. The +sinner is ill and the so-called saint is also ill because both are asleep. + +The illness is the sleep, not your character. Your character is just a by-product. And +whatsoever you do while remaining asleep will not make any basic change. Only one +thing can change you and create a mutation and that is alertness. The question is one of +how to become more and more alert. So whatsoever you do, make it an object of +alertness. If you do some immoral act, do it meditatively. It will not be long before the +act will dissolve by itself and disappear. Then you will not be able to do it — not because +you have created an armor against it, but because now you are more alert. And how can +you do a thing which needs sleep as a requisite? You cannot do it. + +Understand well this basic distinction between tantra and what others teach. Tantra is +more scientific. It goes to the very root of the problem, transforms you from the very + + + +being — not from your outer sheath of character, of morality and immorality, of acts and +doings. Whatsoever you do is just on the periphery; whatsoever you are is never on the +periphery. The quality of the act, not the act itself, is meaningful for tantra. + +For example, one butcher came to Nan-in. + +He was a butcher and Nan-in was a Buddhist monk who believed in non-violence. His +whole profession was of violence. The whole day he was killing animals. But when the +butcher came to Nan-in, he asked him, "What am I to do? My profession is one of +violence. So am I to leave my profession first and is it that only then I can be a new man, +or is there some other way?" + +Nan-in said, "We are not concerned with what you do. We are concerned with what you +are. So you go on doing whatsoever you are doing, but be more alert. While killing, +remain alert, meditative, and go on doing whatsoever you are doing. We are not +concerned." + +Nan-in's followers became disturbed — because here was a person who was a follower of +Buddha, a believer in non-violence, allowing a butcher to continue. One disciple said, +"This is not good. And we never expected that a person like you would allow a butcher to +remain a butcher. And when he was asking, you should have told him to drop this. He +himself was ready." + +Nan-in is reported to have said, "You can change the butcher's profession easily; he was +himself ready. But in that way you cannot change his quality of consciousness. He will +remain a butcher." + +He may become a saint, but the quality of the mind will remain that of a butcher. That +will be a deception for others and for himself also. Go and look at your so-called saints. + +Many of them remain butchers. The quality, the attitude, the violence, their very look +towards you, is condemning, violent. You are a sinner and they are saints. When they see +you, the very look is such that you are condemned, you are thrown into hell. + +Nan-in said, "So it is not good to change his outer life; it is better to bring a new quality +to his mind. And it is good to let him remain a butcher, because he is disturbed by his +butchery and violence. If he becomes a saint he will remain a butcher, but then he will +not be disturbed. His ego will be strengthened. So this is good. He is disturbed that +violence is there, and he has become at least this much aware — that this is not good. He +is ready to change, but just readiness to change will not help. A new quality of the mind +has to be developed. Let him meditate." + +After one year had passed, the man came. He had become a different man. He was still a +killer, but the man had changed although the doing remained the same. He came to Nan- +in again and he said, "Now I am a different man. I meditated and meditated and +meditated, and my whole life has become a meditation because you told me to meditate +in whatsoever I am doing. I am butchering animals, but the whole day I am meditating. +Now what do you tell me to do?" + +So Nan-in said, "Now do not come to me. Allow your awareness to make a path for you. +You need not come to me." + + +So the butcher said, "Now, only if you say remain in the profession will I pretend to be +there. But as far as I am concerned, I am no more there. So if you allow me, I am not +going back. But if you say to go, then it is okay. I will go and pretend, and I will + + + +continue." + +This is how, when your quality changes — your quality of consciousness — you become a +different person altogether. And tantra is concerned with you, not with what you do. + +The second question: + +Question 2 + +"IF ONE FOLLOWS CERTAIN LAWS OF LIFE AND CALLS THIS MORAL, THEN +IS THERE ANY OBJECTION FROM A TANTRIC?" + +Tantra has no objections, but this having no objection is the problem. Tantra has no +objection whatsoever; tantra is not in any way condemning. It is not concerned to tell +you, "Do this," or "Don't do that." If you feel good, if you feel happy following certain +principles, then follow them. But following certain principles can never lead you to +happiness because you are not going to change through principles and through following +them. You will remain the same. + +Principles are always borrowed, ideals are always borrowed. Someone else has given +them to you. They are not your own; they have not grown out of your own experience. +They are without roots. The society, the religion to which you are born, the teachers you +happened to be near, they have given them to you. + +You can follow them and you can force yourself accordingly, but then you will be a dead +person — not alive. You may create a certain peace around yourself, but that will be the +peace of the cemetery — dead. You may be less vulnerable to disturbances, more closed +in because of the principles, but then you will become less sensitive and less alive. So so- +called principled men are always dead. + +Look at them: they look silent, still, peaceful, at ease, but a certain deadness is always +around them. The aura of death is always there. You cannot feel the feast of life around +them, the festivity of being alive, the celebration of being alive. You can never feel that +around them. They have created an armor around them — a safety armor. Nothing can +penetrate them. The walls of their principles and character stop everything, but then they +are behind the walls, imprisoned, and they are their own prisoners. If you choose this, +tantra has no objection. You are free to choose a life which is not a life at all. + +Once Mulla Nasruddin visited a cemetery, and he saw a very beautiful marble +mausoleum. Inscribed on it was the name "Rothschild." Mulla is reported to have said, +"Aha! Ahhh! This is what I call life. This is what I called living — a beautiful marble +mausoleum." But howsoever beautiful it is, it is not life. It is marble — beautiful, rich — +but not life. You can create a mausoleum out of your life through principles, ideals, +impositions, but then you will be dead, although less vulnerable because death is not +vulnerable. + + +Death is a security; life is always insecure. Anything can happen to a live person; nothing +can happen to a dead person. He is secure. There is no future, no possibility for change. +The last thing has happened to him — death. Now nothing can happen. + +Principled personalities are dead personalities. Tantra is not interested in them. Tantra +has no objection — if you feel good being dead, it is your choice. You can commit +suicide, and this is a suicide. But tantra is for those who want to be more alive, and the +truth, the ultimate, is not death, it is life. Remember that: the ultimate is not death. It is + + + +life — more life. Jesus has said, "Abundant life, infinite life." + +So by being dead you can never reach to the ultimate. If it is life, and "abundant life," +then by being dead you will never be in contact with it. Just by being more alive, more +vulnerable, more sensitive, less principled and more alert, you will reach it. Why do you +seek principles? You may not have observed why. It is because with principles you need +not be alert. You need not be alert! If you live through principles you need not be alert. +Suppose I make a principle out of non-violence and then I stick to it, or I make it a +principle to be truthful and I stick to it; then it becomes a habit. I create a habit of being +truthful, of always speaking the truth. It becomes a mechanical habit; now there is no +need to be alert. + +I cannot speak lies because a principle, a habit, will always create a barrier. The society +depends on principles, on inculcating and educating the children with principles. Then +they become incapable, really, of being otherwise. If a person becomes incapable, he is +dead. + +Your truth can be alive only if it comes through alertness, not through principle. Each +moment you have to be alert in order to be true. Truth is not a principle; it is something +bom out of your alertness. Non-violence is not a principle; if you are alert you cannot be +violent. But that is difficult and arduous. You will have to transform yourself totally. It is +easy to create a life according to principles, rules and regulations. Then you need not +worry. You need not worry about being more alert and aware; you can follow the +principles. + +Then you are just like a railway train running on the tracks. Those tracks are your +principles. You are not afraid because you cannot miss the path. Really, you don’t have +any path.; you have just mechanical rails on which your train is running. You will reach +the destination, you need not be afraid. You will be asleep and the train will reach. It is +running on dead paths; they are not alive. + +But tantra says that life is not like that, it is more like a river. It is not running on iron +rails, on tracks; really, it is like a river. The path has not even been charted before. + +As the river flows, the path is created. As the river moves, the path is created. The river +will reach to the sea, and this is how life should be if you understand the tantra way. + +Life is like a river. There is no precharted way; there are no maps to be given to you +which are to be followed. Just be alive and alert, and then wheresoever life leads you go +with full confidence in it. Tantra is a trust — a trust in the life force. Allow it to lead you, +don’t force it. Surrender to it and allow it to lead you towards the sea. Just be alert, that is +all. While life leads you towards the sea just be alert so that you don't miss anything. + +It is very important to remember that tantra is not simply concerned with the end; it is +also concerned with the means. It is also concerned with the path, not only the +destination. If you are alert, even this life will be a bliss. The very movement of the river +is a bliss in itself. Passing through the valleys, through the rocks, falling down from the +hills, moving into the unknown is itself a bliss. + +Be alert here also, because the ocean, the ultimate, cannot just be a happening in the end. +It cannot be. It is a growth. The river is "growing" to be the sea. It is not simply going to +meet the sea, it is "growing" to be the sea, and this is possible only through rich +experience, alert experiences, moving, trusting. This is how tantra looks at the search — at +the human search. + + + +Of course, it is dangerous. If rivers can be run through predetennined paths, there would +be less danger, fewer errors. But the whole beauty of aliveness would be lost. + +So don't be a follower of principles. Just be a creator of more and more consciousness. +Those principles will happen to you, but you will never feel imprisoned in them. + +The third question: + +Question 3 + +"THE SECOND SUTRA DISCUSSED YESTERDAY SAYS, 'THE PURITY OF +OTHER TEACHINGS IS AN IMPURITY TO US. IN REALITY, KNOW NOTHING +AS PURE OR IMPURE.’ IF NOTHING IS IMPURE, THEN HOW CAN THE +TEACHINGS OF OTHERS BE IMPURE?" + +Really, nothing is impure, but the teaching that something is pure and something is +impure has to be discarded. Only in that sense does the sutra mean, "The purity of other +teachings is an impurity to us." Nothing is pure and nothing is impure, but if someone +teaches that something is pure and something is impure, tantra says that this has to be +discarded. Only in this sense does the sutra say that "The purity of other teachings is an +impurity to us." This is just a discarding. It is just saying don’t make any distinctions, +remain innocent. + +But look at the complexity of life. If I say remain innocent, and if you then try innocence, +that innocence will not be innocent. How can it be? If you have "tried" it, it has become a +calculated thing. + +Then it cannot be innocent. If you try it, it cannot be! So what is to be done? Just discard +those things which create cunningness. Don’t try to create any innocence; you cannot. + +Just discard those things which create cunningness in your mind. This is negative. When +you have discarded the root causes of cunningness, innocence will have happened to you. +Nothing is pure or impure. But what is to be done then? Your mind is filled with +distinctions: "This is pure and That is impure." So tantra says, "For us this is the only +impurity. This mind filled with concepts of purity and impurity is the only impurity. If +you can discard it, you have become pure." + +This sutra is meaningful in another sense also. There are teachings with very fixed rules. +For example, Catholic Christian teachings or Jaina teachings in India are against sex.; +they say that sex is impure, ugly, sin. Tantra says that nothing is ugly, nothing is impure, +nothing is sin. Even sex can become a path; even sex can become a path toward +salvation. It depends on you. It is not sex, it is you who determines the quality of it. + +Even prayer can become a sin — and sex can become a virtue. It depends on you. The +value is not in the object, the value is brought to it by you. Look at it — at this +phenomenon — in a different way. Tantra says that even sex can become salvation, but +then come to sex without any notions of purity and impurity, good or bad, morality and +immorality. + +Come to sex as pure energy, just energy. Move in that energy as if you are moving into +the unknown. Don’t fall asleep: be alert! When sex brings you to the very root of your +being, be alert. Don’t fall asleep, on the path. Be alert and experience everything, +whatsoever is happening — the relaxation that comes, the tension that happens, the peak +that comes, and the valley in which you are thrown back. + +Your ego dissolves for a moment; you become one with your beloved or with your + + + +partner. For a moment, the two are not there. The bodies are two, but deep down there is +a communion and they have become one. Be alert! Don’t miss this moment in sleep. Be +alert; see what is happening. This oneness is what was hidden in the sex act. The sex was +just the outer core. Now this is the meaning — the central point. This is what you were +longing for, this is what the hankering was for. This was for what there was the search — +this unity, this dissolving of the ego, this feeling of oneness, this ecstasy of non-tension, +this ecstasy of relaxation. This was the meaning, the goal, and this is what you were +searching for through this woman and that, through this man and that. Y ou were +searching and searching, but no woman can fulfill it, no man can give it. + +Only through a deep tantric awareness does the sex act completely disappear, and a deep +ecstasy is revealed. So tantra says it is you: if you can bring meditation to your love, to +your sex, the sex is transformed. + +So tantra doesn't say that this is pure or that is impure — and if you want to use the old +tenninology of purity and impurity, then I will say that for tantra sleep is impure, +alertness is pure, and all else is just meaningless. + +The fourth question: + +Question 4 + +"IF AN EMOTIONAL DESIRE OR MOOD BECOMES EXHILARATING FOR US, +AND IF WE DO NOT EXPRESS IT OUTWARDLY, DOES THIS ENERGY +NECESSARILY GO BACK TO THE SOURCE AND MAKE THE PERSON FRESH +AND ENERGETIC?" + +Not necessarily! But if you are aware, then it is so, necessarily. Any energy, any energy, +needs roots to move, and no energy can be destroyed. Energy is indestructible. It can only +change into different forms; it can never become nothing. So when you try to suppress +any energy, you are doing absolute nonsense with yourself. Energy cannot be suppressed: +it can only be transformed. A suppressed energy will become a cancer. If you feel anger, +two ordinary routes are available: either express it or suppress it. If you express it, then it +becomes a chain, because then you create anger in the other person and he will express it +— and there is no end to it. Then you will express it, and it can continue for years. It +continues! That is how everyone is living. It goes on and on. + +Those who know deeply, they say that for lives also, for lives together, it goes on and on. +You have been angry with a person in your past life, and still in this life you are repeating +the same pattern with the same person. + +You are not aware, you are blissfully unaware. So it is good if you think something new +is happening. Ninety-nine percent of the time nothing new is happening; old patterns are +just being repeated again and again. + +Sometimes you suddenly see a stranger, and you become angry. He has not done +anything — you have not even met him before — but you feel depressed or angry or +violent, or you want just to escape from this person. You feel bad. Why? It is some old +pattern. Energy never dies, it remains, so if you express it, you are falling into an eternal +chain. Someday you will have to come out of it. And the whole thing is useless, it is just +wastage. Don't start the chain. + +Then the other ordinary alternative is to suppress it, and when you suppress it you are +creating a wound within yourself. That will be a suffering. That will create problems. + + + +And the anger will go on being suppressed, and you will become a volcano of anger. + +So it may be that you are not now expressing your anger, but now your whole personality +will become angry. There will be no eruptions, no one will see you beating someone and +being violent, but now your whole personality will become angry because so much anger +within poisons you. Now whatsoever you do the angry part is there. Even while you are +loving someone, the angry part is there — in everything. If you are eating your food, the +angry part will be there. + +You will be violent with your food, you will not be loving. If you are opening a door, the +angry part will be there. You will be violent with the door. + +One day in the morning, Mulla Nasruddin was passing down a street shouting oaths and +saying very angrily, "The devil will take possession of your spirit and beets will grow in +your belly" — and so it went on and on. + +One man looked at him and said, "Mulla, whom are you cursing so much so early in the +morning?" + +Mulla said, "Who? I don't know. But don't worry, someone will turn up sooner or later." +If you are filled with anger, this happens: you are just waiting, and sooner or later +someone will turn up. Inside you are bubbling with fire, just waiting for some objects, +some medium, someone who should help you to unburden yourself. Then your whole +personality becomes angry or violent or sexual. Y ou can suppress sex, and then the +suppressed sex becomes your whole personality. Then wherever you look you will see +sex, in whatsoever you touch you will see sex, whatsoever you do will be a sexual act. +You can suppress sex very easily; it is not difficult. But then sex will spread all over you. +Your every fiber, every cell will become sexual. + +Look at the celibates. Their minds become totally sexual; they dream about sex, they +fight with sex; constantly they fantasize about sex. They are obsessed. + +That which could have been natural has become perverted. If you express it you create a +chain, if you suppress you create a wound, and both are not good. So tantra says that +whatsoever you do — for example, if you are angry, when you feel that anger is coming — +be uninterruptedly aware. Don’t suppress it and don’t express it. Do a third thing, take the +third alternative: be suddenly aware that anger is coming. This awareness changes the +energy that is moving as anger into a different energy. The very energy that is known as +anger becomes compassion. Through alertness there is the transmutation. + +The same energy which is known as sex becomes BRAHMACHARYA, spirituality, +through awareness. Alertness is the alchemy. Through it everything changes. Try it, and +you will come to know. When you bring alertness, awareness, to any mood, any feeling, +any energy, it changes its nature and quality. It is never the same again, and a new route +opens. It is not going back again to the same place where it was, from where it came; it is +not moving outwards The horizontal movement has stopped. With alertness it becomes +vertical, it moves upwards. That is a different dimension. A bullock cart moves +horizontally; an airplane moves vertically — upwards. + +I would like to tell you one parable. One fakir, a Sufi, used to say that someone was +presented an airplane, a very small aircraft, by a friend, who was a great king. + +But the man was poor. He had heard about airplanes, but he had never seen one. He knew +only bullock carts, so he thought that this was a new device — a new type of bullock cart. +He used his two bullocks to bring the airplane home, and then he used the airplane as a + + + +bullock cart. He was very happy. Of course, the small aircraft worked as a bullock cart. +But then, by and by, just from being curious he started studying it. Then he came to +understand that bullocks were not needed. It had a motor and it was able to go by itself, +so he fueled it and used it as a motor car. + +But then by and by, he became aware of the wings, and he thought "Why are they +there?" And it seemed to him that the man who had devised this machine must have been +very intelligent, a genius; thus, he could not have added something unnecessarily. The +wings showed that the machine could fly also. So he tried. Then the airplane came to its +own; it became vertical. + +You are using the mind that you have as a bullock cart. The same mind can become a +motor car; then bullocks will not be needed. It has an inbuilt mechanism, but then too it +will be moving horizontally. However, the same mind has wings. You have not observed, +that is why you don’t know that it has wings. It can fly! It can move upwards! And once it +moves upwards, once your energies start moving upwards, the whole world is different. +Your old questions simply fall down and your old problems are no more there, because +you are now moving vertically. + + +All those problems were there because you were moving horizontally. The problems of a +bullock cart are not problems for an airplane. The road was not good, so there was a +problem. The road was blocked, so there was a problem. Now this is not a problem +because the road is not used at all. Whether blocked or not, whether good or not, it is +irrelevant. + +Moral teachings are bullock-cart teachings; tantra's teaching is vertical. That's why all +those problems are irrelevant for tantra. The energy that you know as anger, sex, greed or +whatsoever, is moving horizontally. Once you bring your alertness to it, you have +brought a new dimension. Just by being alert, you move upwards. + +Why? Observe the fact: when you are alert, you are always above the fact. Become alert +about anything, and you are always above the fact. The fact is somewhere below, down, +and you are looking from above, from a peak. Whenever you have witnessed something +you have moved upwards, and the thing has remained below. If this attention is really +authentic and you can be uninterruptedly aware, then the energy that was moving +horizontally as anger, as sex, will move into this new dimension. It will come near to +you, to the witness. Then you have started flying. And for lives and lives you have been +using the device which is meant for flying as a bullock cart, unnecessarily creating +problems because you were just not knowing what is possible for you. + + +The fifth question: + +Question 5 + +"YOU SAID THAT ONE SHOULD NEITHER SUPPRESS NOR INDULGE IN +ANGER, BUT THAT ONE SHOULD REMAIN PASSIVELY ALERT AND +MEDITATIVE. OBVIOUSLY, IT WILL NEED A SORT OF INNER EFFORT TO +AVOID SUPPRESSION OR INDULGENCE, BUT THEN IS THIS NOT ALSO A +SORT OF SUPPRESSION?" + + +No! It is an effort, but not. "a sort of suppression." Every effort is not suppression. There + + + +are three types of effort. One is the effort which is expression. When you express your +anger, it is an effort. Then the second type of effort is when you suppress it. When you +express what you are doing, you are forcing your energy outwards to the person, to the +object; you are throwing out your energy, the other is the target. Energy moves to the +other; it is an effort. When you suppress, you return the energy back to the original +source, to your own heart. You force it back. It is an effort, but the direction is different. +In expression it moves away from you; in suppression it again moves near you. + +The third thing, alertness, passive alertness, is also an effort, but the dimension is +different. The energy moves upwards. In the beginning it is an effort. When I say be +passively alert, in the beginning even passivity is bound to be an effort. Only by and by, +as you become more acquainted with it, will it not be an effort. And when it is not an +effort, it becomes more passive — and the more passive, the more magnetic. + +It pulls the energy upwards. + +But in the beginning everything is going to be an effort, so don’t become a victim of +words. It creates problems. Mystics have always been talking about effortlessness. They +say don't make any effort. But in the beginning even this is going to be an effort. When +we say be effortless we only mean don't force the effort. Allow it to come through +awareness. If you force it, you will become tense. If you become tense, anger cannot +move upwards. Tension is horizontal; only a non-tense mind can be above, hovering like +a cloud. + +Look at the clouds floating with no effort. Just bring your witnessing in like a floating +cloud. In the beginning it is going to be an effort, but remember only that it is going to +become effortless. You will be forcing it and allowing it more and more. + +This is difficult because language creates the difficulty. If I tell you to relax, what will +you do? You will make a sort of effort. But then I tell you don’t make any effort, because +if you make any effort that will create tension and you will not be able to relax. I tell you +to simply relax. Then you are at a loss, and you are bound to ask, "Then what do you +mean? If I am not going to make any effort then what am I supposed to do?" + +You are not supposed to do anything, but in the beginning that non-doing will look like a +doing. So I will say, "Okay! Make a little effort, but remember that the effort is to be left +behind. + +Use it as a starter just in the beginning. You cannot understand non-doing; you can only +understand doing. So use the language of doing and action. Start, but use effort only as a +starter. And remember, the sooner you leave it behind, the better. + +I have heard that when Mulla Nasruddin became very old, he became a victim of +insomnia, he couldn’t sleep. Everything was tried — hot baths, pills, tranquilizers, syrups +— but nothing was of any help. Everything was of no avail. And the children were +disturbed because Mulla would not sleep himself, and he would not allow anyone in the +house to sleep. So the whole night had become a nightmare for the whole family. + +They searched desperately for any method, any medicine that would help Mulla to sleep, +because the whole family was going crazy. So finally they brought a hypnotist. The +children came very happily, and they told old Mulla, "Now you need not be worried, +papa. This is a miracle man. He creates sleep within minutes. He knows the very magic +of it, so don’t be worried. Now there is no fear, and you will sleep." + +The hypnotist showed a watch with a chain to Nasruddin and said, "Only very little faith +will do the miracle. You need a little trust towards me. Just trust me, and you will fall + + + +like a small babe into deep sleep. Look at this watch." + +He started moving that watch left and right. Nasruddin looked at it, and the hypnotist +said, "Left-right, left-right. + +Your eyes are becoming tired, tired, tired. You are falling asleep, asleep, asleep, asleep." +Everyone was in joy — happy. Mulla's eyes closed, his head moved down, and he felt like +a small babe going into deep sleep. A very rhythmic breathing came. The hypnotist took +his fee, and he put his finger on his lips, just to indicate to the children not to be disturbed +now. Then he sneaked out. The moment he was out, Mulla opened one eye and said, + +"That nut! Has he gone yet?" + +He was making an effort to relax, so he relaxed "like a babe." He had started breathing +rhythmically and closed his eyes, but it was all an effort. He was helping the hypnotist. + +He thought that he was helping the hypnotist. But it was effort on his part, so nothing +happened. Nothing could happen. He was awake. If he could have just been passive, if he +could have heard what was being said, looked at what was being shown, the sleep would +have happened. No effort on his part was necessary; only passive acceptance was +necessary. But even for you to bring your mind to that passive acceptance, in the +beginning you will need effort. + +So don’t be afraid of effort. Start with effort, and just remember that effort has to be left +behind and you have to move beyond effort. Only when you have moved beyond will you +be passive, and that passive awareness brings the miracle. + +With passive awareness, mind is no more there. + +For the first time your inner center of being is revealed, and there is a reason. Effort is +needed for anything that is to be done in the world. If you want to do something in the +world, anything, effort is needed. But if you want to do something in the inner, no effort +is needed. Just relaxation is needed. Non-doing is the art there just as doing is the art in +the outward, the outside world. + +This passive alertness is the key. But don’t become disturbed by language. Start with +effort. Just keep in mind that you have to leave it, and go on leaving it. Even leaving will +be an effort — but a moment comes when everything has gone. Then you are there, +simply there not doing anything — just there, being. That "beingness" is SAMADHI, and +all that is worth knowing, worth having, worth being, happens to you in that state. + + +THE END. + + + +Chapter 43: Finding the changeless through the changing + + +BE THE UNSAME SAME TO FRIEND AS TO STRANGER, IN HONOR AND +DISHONOR. + +HERE IS THE SPHERE OF CHANGE, CHANGE, CHANGE. THROUGH CHANGE +CONSUME CHANGE. + +Northrope says somewhere that the Western mind has been continuously searching for +the theoretical component of existence — the causal link for how things happen, what is +the cause, how the effect can be controlled, how man can manipulate nature. And the +Eastern mind, says Northrope, has been on a different adventure. The search has been to +find the aesthetic component of reality — not the theoretical, but the aesthetic. + +The Eastern mind has not been much involved with the search to know how to +manipulate nature, but it has been interested in how to be one with nature — not in how to +conquer it, but in how to be in a deep friendship, a deep participation with it. The +Western mind has been in a conflict, a struggle; the Eastern mind has been in a mystique, +a love relationship. I don’t know whether Northrope will agree with me or not, but my +feeling is that science is a hatred, a relationship of hatred with nature; hence, struggle, +fight, conquering, the language of victory. + +Religion is a love relationship; hence, no conflict, no struggle. In another way, science is +a male attitude and religion a female attitude. Science is aggressive, religion is receptive. +The Eastern mind is religious. + +Or, if you allow me, I will say that wherever a religious mind is, it is Eastern. The +scientific mind is Western. It makes no difference whether a man is born in the East or +the West. I am using East and West as two attitudes, two approaches, not as two +geographical denominations. You can be bom in the West, but you may not belong there; +you may be Eastern through and through. You may be born in the East, but you may not +belong; you may be scientific, the approach may be mathematical, intellectual. + +Tantra is absolutely Eastern. It is a way of participating with reality — a way how to be +one with it, how to dissolve boundaries, how to move in an undifferentiated realm. Mind +differentiates, creates boundaries, definitions, because mind cannot work without +definitions, without boundaries. The more clear-cut the boundaries, the better the +possibility for the mind to work. So mind cuts, divides, chops everything. + +Religion is a dissolving of boundaries in order to move to the undifferentiated where +there is no definition, where there is no limit to anything, where everything moves into +everything else, where everything is everything else. You cannot cut, you cannot chop +existence. The consequences are bound to be very different in each approach. By the +scientific approach, by dividing, chopping, you can come only to dead particles, atoms, +because life is something which cannot be cut into divisions. + +And the moment you cut it, it is no more there. It is as if someone goes to study a +symphony by studying each single note. Each single note is part of the symphony, but it +is not the symphony. The symphony is created by many notes dissolving into each other. +You cannot study a symphony by studying notes. + +I cannot study you by studying your parts, You are not just a total of parts, you are more +than that. When you divide and cut and analyze, life disappears; only dead parts are left. + + + +That is why science will never be capable of knowing what life is, and whatsoever is +known through science will be about death — matter — it will never be about life. Science +may become capable of manipulating life, of knowing the parts, the dead parts. It may be +capable of manipulating life, but, still LIFE is not known, not even touched. Life remains +unknowable for science. By the very method of its technology, its methodology, by the +very approach, life cannot be known through it. + +That is why science goes on denying — denying anything else other than matter. The very +approach debars any contact with that which is life. And the vice versa happens also: if +you move deeply into religion, you will start denying matter. Shankara says that matter is +illusion, it is not there; it simply appears to be. The whole Eastern approach has been to +deny the world, matter, anything material. Why? Science goes on denying life, the divine, +consciousness. + +Deeper religious experiences go on denying matter — all that is material. Why? Because +of the very approach. If you look at life without differentiation, matter disappears. Matter +is life divided, differentiated. Matter means life defined, analyzed into parts. + +So, of course, if you look at life undifferentiatedly and become part of it, in a deep +participation, if you become one with existence as two lovers become one, matter +disappears. That is why Shankara says that matter is illusion. If you participate in +existence, it is. But Marx says that consciousness is just a by-product, it is not +substantial; it is just a function of matter. If you divide life, then consciousness +disappears, becomes illusory. Then only matter is. + +What I am intending to say to you is this: Existence is one. If you approach it through +analysis, it appears material, dead. If you approach it through participation, it appears as +life, as divine, as consciousness. If you approach it through science there is no possibility +of any deep bliss happening to you, because with dead matter bliss is impossible. At the +most it can only be illusory. Only with a deep participation is bliss possible. + +Tantra is a love technique. The effort is to make you one with existence. So you will have +to lose many things before you can enter. You will have to lose your habitual pattern of +analyzing things; you will have to lose the deep-rooted attitude of fighting, of thinking in +tenns of conquering. + + +When Hillary reached to the highest peak of the Himalayas, Mount Everest, all of the +Western world reported it as a conquering — a conquering of Everest. Only in a Zen +monastery in Japan, on a wall newspaper, it was written, "Everest has been befriended" — +not conquered! This is the difference — "Everest has been befriended"; now humanity has +become friendly with it. Everest has allowed Hillary to come to it. It was not a +conquering. The very word 'conquer’ is vulgar, violent. To think in terms of conquering +shows aggressiveness. Everest has received Hillary, welcomed him, and now humanity +has become friendly; now the chasm is bridged. Now we are not unacquainted. One of us +has been received by Everest. Now Everest has become part of human consciousness. +This is a bridging. + +Then the whole thing becomes totally different. It depends on how you look at it. +Remember this before we enter the techniques. Remember this: tantra is a love effort +towards existence. That is why so much of sex has been used by tantra: because it is a +love technique. It is not only love between man and woman; it is love between you and +existence, and for the first time existence becomes meaningful to you through a woman. + + + +If you are a woman, then existence becomes for the first time meaningful to you through +a man. + +That is why sex has been so much discussed and used by tantra. Think of yourself as +absolutely asexual — as if all sex were removed from you the day you were born. + +Just think: all sex was completely removed from you the day you were born. You will be +unable to love; you will be unable to feel any affinity with anyone. It will be difficult to +get out of yourself. You will remain enclosed, you will not be able to approach, to go out +to meet someone. There in existence, you will be a dead thing, closed from everywhere. +Sex is your effort to reach out. You move from yourself; someone else becomes the +center. You leave your ego behind, you go away from it to meet someone. If you really +want to meet you will have to surrender, and if the other also wants to meet you he will +also have to move out. Look at the miracle in love — at what happens. You move to the +other and the other moves to you. He comes into you and you go into him or into her. +You have changed places. Now he becomes your soul and you become her soul or his +soul. This is a participation. Now you are meeting. Now you have become a circle. This +is the first meeting where you are not enclosed in the ego. This meeting can become just +a stepping stone toward a greater meeting with universe, with existence, with reality. +Tantra is based not on intellect, but on heart. It is not an intellectual effort, it is a feeling +effort. Remember this, because that will help you to understand the techniques. Now we +will enter the techniques. + +The first technique: + +"BE THE UNSAME SAME TO FRIEND AS TO STRANGER, IN HONOR AND +DISHONOR." + + +"BE THE UNSAME SAME" — this is the base. What is happening in you? Two things +are happening. Something in you remains continuously the same, it never changes. You +may not have observed it, you may not have encountered it yet, but if you observe you +will come to know that something in you remains constantly the same. Because of that +sameness, you can have an identity. Because of that sameness, you feel yourself centered; +otherwise you will be a chaos. You say, "My childhood." Now what has remained of it? +WHO says, "My childhood"? Who is this "my, me, I"? + +Nothing has remained of your childhood. If your pictures of your childhood are shown to +you for the first time, you will not be able to recognize them. Everything has changed. +Your body is no more the same; not a single cell has remained the same. Physiologists +says that the body is a flux, it is river-like. Every moment many cells are dying and many +new ones are born. Within seven years your body will have changed completely. So if +you are going to live seventy years, ten times over your body has renewed itself +completely. + +Every moment your body is changing, and your mind. You cannot recognize a +photograph of your childhood, and if it were possible to give you a photograph of your +mind, of your childhood mind, it would be impossible to recognize it. Your mind is even +more of a flux than your body. Every moment everything changes. + + +Even for a single moment nothing remains the same. In the morning you were different as +far as your mind is concerned. In the evening you are totally a different person. + + + +When someone would come to meet Buddha, before the person would depart, take leave +of him, Buddha would say, "Remember, the man who has come to meet me is not the +man who is going back. You are totally different now. Your mind has changed." Meeting +with a buddha is, of course, bound to change your mind for better or worse, but you +cannot be the same. + +You came here with a different mind; you will go with a different mind. Something has +changed. Something new has been added, something has been deleted. And even if you +are not meeting anyone, if you are just remaining by yourself, then too you cannot remain +the same. Every moment the river is moving. + +Heraclitus has said, "You cannot step twice in the same river." The same can be said +about man: you cannot meet the same man again — impossible! And because of this fact, +and because of our ignorance of it, life becomes a misery — because you go on expecting +the other to be the same. You marry a girl and you expect her to be the same. She cannot +be! Unmarried, she was different; married, she is completely different. A lover is +something else, a husband is something totally different. You cannot expect your lover to +meet you through your husband. + +That is impossible. A lover is a lover; a husband is a husband. The moment a lover +becomes a husband, everything has changed. But you go on expecting. That creates +misery — unnecessary misery. If we can recognize this fact that mind goes on moving and +changing continuously, we will escape many, many miseries without any cost. All you +need is simple awareness that mind changes. + +Someone loves you and then you go on expecting love. But the next moment he hates +you; then you are disturbed — not because of his hate, but only because of your +expectation. He has changed. He is alive, so he is bound to change. But if you can see the +reality as it is you will not be disturbed. The one who was in love a moment before can +be in hate a moment later, but wait! One moment later he will be in love again. So don’t +be in a hurry, just be patient. And if the other can also see this changing pattern, then he +will not be fighting for changing patterns. They change; that is natural. + +So if you look at your body, it changes. If you try to understand your mind, it changes. It +is never the same. Even for two consecutive moments, nothing is the same. Your +personality goes on like a flux. If this is all and there is nothing which remains the same +continuously, eternally, timelessly, then who will remember that this was "my +childhood"? Childhood has changed, the body has changed, the mind has changed. + +Then who remembers? Then who knows about childhood and about youth and about old +age? Who knows? + +This knower must remain the same; this witness must remain the same. Only then can the +witness have a perspective. The witness can say, "This was my childhood, this was my +young age, this was my old age. This moment I was in love, and this moment the love +changed into hatred." This witnessing consciousness, this knower, is always the same. + +So you have two realms or two dimensions existing together in you. You are both — the +changing which is always changing and the non-changing which is always remaining +non-changing. If you become aware of these two realms, then this technique will be +helpful: "BE THE UNSAME SAME." Remember this: "BE THE UNSAME SAME." + +You are bound to be "unsame" on the periphery, but at the center remain the same. +Remember that which is the same. Just remembering will be enough; you need not do +anything else. It is non-changing. You cannot change it, but you can forget it. You can be + + + +so engrossed, obsessed with the changing world around you — with your body, with your +mind — that you may completely forget the center. The center is so much clouded by the +changing flux — and, of course, there are problems: that which is constantly the same is +difficult to remember because change creates problems. + +For example, if a constant noise goes on around you, you will not be aware of it. + +If a clock on the wall goes on, tick-tock, tick-tock the whole day, you are never aware of +it. But if suddenly it stops, you will immediately become aware. If something is +constantly the same, there is no need to take any notice. When something changes, the +mind has to take notice. It creates a gap, and the pattern vibrates. You were hearing it +continuously, so there was no need to hear it. It was there, it became part of the +background. But if now suddenly the clock stops, you will become aware. Your +consciousness will suddenly come to the gap. + +It is just as if one of your teeth falls out; then your tongue goes continuously to the place. +When the tooth was there the tongue never tried to touch it. Now the tooth is not there — +just a gap is there — then the whole day, howsoever you try, you cannot help it: the +tongue goes to the gap. Why? Because something is missing and the background has +changed. Something new has entered. + +Whenever something new enters, you become conscious — for many reasons. It is a +safety measure. It is needed for your life — to survive. When something changes you have +to become aware. It may be dangerous. You have to take notice, and you have to adjust +again to the new situation that has come into being. But if everything is as it was, there is +no need. You need not be aware. And this same element in you, what Hindus have called +ATMAN, the soul, has been there always from the very beginning, if there was any +beginning. + +And it is going to the very end, if there is going to be any end. It has been eternally the +same, so how can you be aware of it? + +Because it is so pennanently the same, eternally the same, you are missing it. You take +notice of the body, you take notice of the mind because they are changing. And because +you take notice of them, you start thinking that you are them. You know only them; you +become identified. + +The whole spiritual effort is to find the same amidst the unsame — to find the eternal in +the changing, to find that which is always the same. That is your center, and if you can +remember that center, only then will this technique be easy — or if you can do this +technique, remembering will become easy. From both the ends you can travel. + +Try this technique. The technique is to "BE THE UNSAME SAME TO FRIEND AS TO +STRANGER." To the friend and to the enemy, or to the stranger, be the "unsame same." +What does it mean? It seems contradictory. In a way you will have to change, because if +your friend comes to meet you, you will have to meet him differently, and if a stranger +comes you will have to meet him differently. How can you meet a stranger as if you +know him already? You cannot. The difference will be there, but still, deep down remain +the same. The attitude must remain the same, but the behavior will be "unsame." You +cannot meet an unknown person as if you know him already. + +How can you? You can pretend at the most, but pretensions will not do. The difference +will be there. + +There is no need to pretend with a friend that he is a friend. With a stranger, even if you + + + +try to act as if he is a friend, it will be pretension — something new. You cannot be the +same; unsameness will be necessary. As far as behavior is concerned you will be +different, but as far as your consciousness is concerned you can be the same. You can +look at the friend as at the stranger. + +It is difficult. You may have heard, "Look at the stranger as if he is a friend," but that is +not possible if what I am saying is not possible. First look at your friend as the stranger; +only then you can look at the stranger as at the friend. They are correlated. + +Have you ever looked at your friends as if they are strangers? If you have not, then you +have not looked at all. Look at your wife: do you really know her? You may have lived +with her for twenty years or even more, and the more you live with her, the more is the +possibility that you will go on forgetting that she is a stranger — and she remains a +stranger. Howsoever you love her, it will not make any difference. + +Really, if you love her more, the more strange she will look — because the more you love, +the deeper you penetrate and the more you know how river-like she is, moving, changing, +alive, every moment different. + +If you don’t look deeply, if you just stick to the level that she is your wife, that this is her +name or that, then you have chosen a particular fragment, and you go on thinking of that +particular fragment as your wife. And whenever she has to change, she has to hide her +changes. She may not be in a loving mood, but she has to pretend because you expect +love from your wife. + +Then everything becomes false. She is not allowed to change; she is not allowed to be +herself. Then something is being forced. Then the whole relationship goes dead. The +more you love, the more you will feel the changing pattern. Then each moment you are a +stranger. You cannot predict; you cannot say how your husband is going to behave +tomorrow morning. You can predict only if you have a dead husband: then you can +predict. Predictions are possible only about things, never about persons. If some person is +predictable, know well he is dead; he has died. His living is just false, so you can predict. +Nothing is predictable about persons because of the change. + +Look at your friend as at a stranger; he is one! Don’t be afraid. We are afraid of strangers, +so we go on forgetting that even a friend is a stranger. If you can look at the stranger in +your friend also, you will never get frustrated because you cannot expect anything from a +stranger. You take your friends for granted; hence, expectations and then frustrations — +because no one can fulfill your expectations, no one is here to fulfill your expectations. + +Everyone is here to fulfill his own expectations; no one is here to fulfill you. Everyone is +here to fulfill himself or herself, but you expect others to fulfill you and others expect +you to fulfill them. Then there is conflict, violence, struggle and misery. + +Go on always remembering the stranger. Don’t forget, even your closest friend is a +stranger — as far removed from you as possible. If this feeling happens to you, this +knowing, then you can look at the stranger and you can find a friend there also. If a friend +can be a stranger, then a stranger can be a friend. Look at a stranger: he doesn't know +your language, he doesn’t belong to your country, he doesn’t belong to your religion, he +doesn’t belong to your color. You are white and he is black or you are black and he is +white. You cannot communicate through language; you don’t belong to the same church. +So there is no common ground in nation, religion, race or color — no common ground! + +He is totally a stranger. But look into his eyes, and the same humanity is there, that is the +common ground; and the same life, that is the common ground; and the same existence, + + + +that is the root of your being friends. + +You may not understand his language, but you can understand him. Even silence can be +communicative. Just by your looking deep down into his eyes, the friend will be revealed. +And if you know how to look, then even an enemy cannot deceive you. + +You can look at the friend in him. He cannot prove that he is not your friend. Howsoever +far removed, he is near you because you belong to the same existential current, to the +same river to which he belongs. You belong to the same earth of being. + +If this happens, then even a tree is not far away from you, then even a stone is not far +away from you. A stone is very strange. There is no meeting ground, no possibility of any +communication — but the same existence is there. The stone also exists, the stone also +participates in being. He is there — I call it "he" — he also takes up space, he also exists in +time. The sun also rises for him — as it rises for you. One day he was not, as you were +not, and one day you will die and he will also die. The stone will disappear. In existence +we meet. The meeting is the friendship. In personality we differ, in manifestation we +differ; in essence we are one. + +In manifestations we are strangers, so howsoever close we come we remain far away. + +You can sit close, you can embrace each other, but there is no possibility to come more +close. As far as your changing personality is concerned, you are never the same. You are +never similar; you are always strangers. You cannot meet there because before you can +meet you have changed. There is no possibility of meeting. As far as bodies are +concerned and minds are concerned there can be no meeting, because before you can +meet you are no more the same. + + +Have you ever observed? You feel love for someone — a very deep upsurge. You are +fdled with it, and the moment you go and say, "I love you," it has disappeared. Have you +observed? It may not be there now, it may be just a memory. It was there, but it is not +there now. The very fact that you asserted it, made it manifest, has made it enter into the +realm of change. When you felt it, it may have been deep in the essence, but when you +bring it out you are bringing it into the pattern of time and change, it is entering into the +river. When you say, "I love you," by then it may have disappeared completely. It is so +difficult, but if you observe, it will become a fact. Then you can look. In the friend there +is the stranger and in the stranger the friend. Then you can remain "THE UNSAME +SAME." You change peripherally; you remain the same in the essence, in the center. + +"IN HONOR AND DISHONOR..." Who is honored and who is dishonored? You? + +Never! Only that which is changing, and that you are not. Someone honors you; if you +take it that he is honoring YOU, you will be in difficulty. He honors a particular +manifestation in you, not you. How can he know you? You don't even know yourself. He +honors a particular manifestation; he honors something which has come into your +changing personality. You are kind, loving; he honors it. But this kindness and this love +are just on the periphery. + +The next moment you will not be loving, you may be filled with hate. There may be no +flowers — only thorns. You may not be so happy. You may be just sad, depressed. You +may be cruel, angry. Then he will dishonor you. Then again the loving manifestation. +Others come in contact not with you, but with your manifestations. + +Remember this, they are not honoring and dishonoring YOU. They cannot do either + + + +because they don't know you; they cannot know you. If even you are not aware of +yourself, how can they be? They have their own formulas, they have their theories, they +have their measurements and criteria. They have their touchstones and they say, "If a man +is such and such we will honor him, and if a man is such and such we will dishonor +him." So they act according to their criteria, and you are never near their touchstones — +only your manifestations. + +They can call you a sinner one day and a saint another. They can call you a saint today, +and the next day they may go against you, stone you to death. What is happening? They +come in contact with your periphery, they never come in contact with you. Remember +this, that whatsoever they are saying, it is not about you. You remain beyond; you remain +outside. Their condemnations, their appreciations, whatsoever they do is not really +concerned with you, just with your manifestations in time. + +I will tell you one Zen anecdote. + +One young monk lived near Kyoto. He was beautiful, young, and the whole town was +pleased. They honored him. They believed him to be a great saint. Then one day +everything turned upside down. One girl became pregnant, and she told her parents that +this monk was responsible. So the whole town turned against him. They came, and they +burned his cottage. It was morning, and a very cold morning, a winter morning, and they +threw the child onto the mo nk . + +The father of the girl told him, "This is your child, so take the responsibility." + +The monk simply said, "Is it so?" And then the child started weeping, so he forgot about +the crowd and began caring for the child. + +The crowd went and destroyed the whole cottage, burned it down. Then the child was +hungry and the monk was without any money, so he had to go to beg in the city for the +child. Who will give him anything now? Just a few moments before he was a great saint, +and now he is a great sinner. Who will give him anything now? Wherever he tried, they +closed their doors in his face. They condemned him completely. + +Then he reached to the same house — to the house of the girl. The girl was very much +distressed, and then she heard the child weeping and screaming, and the monk standing +there just saying, "Don’t give anything to me, I am a sinner. But the child is not a sinner; +you can give milk to this child." + +Then the girl confessed that just to hide the real father of the child, she had taken the +name of the monk. He was absolutely innocent. + +So the whole town turned around again. They fell at his feet, started asking his +forgiveness. And the father of the girl came, took the child back with weeping eyes, tears +rolling down, and he said, "But why did you not say so before? Why did you not refuse in +the morning? The child does not belong to you." + +The monk is reported to have said again, "Is it so?" In the morning he had said, "Is it so? +This child belongs to me?" And in the afternoon he said, "Is it so? This child doesn't +belong to me?" + +This is how this sutra has to be applied in life. In honor and dishonor, you must remain +"THE UNSAME SAME." The innermost center must remain the same, whatsoever +happens to the periphery. The periphery is bound to change, but you must not change. + +And because you are two, the periphery and the center, that is why opposite, +contradictory terms have been used: "BE THE UNSAME SAME..." And you can apply +this technique to all opposites: in love and hate, poverty and richness, comfort and + + + +uncomfort, or in anything, remain "THE UNSAME SAME." + +Just know that the change is happening only to your periphery; it cannot happen to you, it +is impossible. So you can remain detached, and this detachment is not forced. You simply +know it is so. + +This is not a forced detachment; this is not any effort on your part to remain detached. If +you TRY to remain detached, you are still on the periphery; you have not kn own the +center. The center is detached; it has always been so. It is transcendental. It is always the +beyond. Whatsoever happens below never happens to it. + +Try this in polar situations. Go on feeling something in you which is the same. When +someone is insulting you, focus yourself to the point where you are just listening to him +— not doing anything, not reacting — just listening. He is insulting you, and then someone +is praising you. Just listen. Insult-praise, honor-dishonor: just listen. Your periphery will +get disturbed. Look at it also; don’t change it. Look at it; remain deep in your center, +looking from there. You will have a detachment which is not forced, which is +spontaneous, which is natural. + +And once you have the feeling of the natural detachment, nothing can disturb you. You +will remain silent. Whatsoever happens in the world, you will remain unmoved. Even if +someone is killing you, only the body will be touched — not you. You will remain +beyond. This "beyondness" leads you into existence, into that which is bliss, eternal, into +that which is true, which is always, into that which is deathless, into life itself. You may +call it God or you can choose your term. You can call it NIRVANA, whatsoever you like, +but unless you move from the periphery to the center and unless you become aware of the +eternal in you, religion has not happened to you, neither has life happened to you. + +You are missing, simply missing all. That is possible — to miss the ecstasy of living. +Shankara says that "I call the man a SANNYASIN who knows what is changing and +what is non- changing, who knows what is moving and what is non-moving." This, in +Indian philosophy, is known as discrimination — VIVEK. To discriminate between these +two, the realm of the change and the realm of the unchanging — this is called VIVEK, +discrimination, awareness. + +This sutra can be used very, very deeply and very easily with whatsoever you are doing. +You feel hunger? Remember the two realms. Hunger can only be felt by the periphery +because the periphery needs food, needs fuel. You don’t need food, you don’t need any +fuel, but the body needs them. Remember, when hunger happens it is happening to the +periphery; you are just the knower of it. If you were not there, it would not be known. If +the body were not there, it would not happen. By your absence only knowledge will not +be there because the body cannot know. The body can have it, but it cannot know it. You +know it; you cannot have it. + +So never say that "I am hungry." Always say within, "I know that my body is hungry." +Give emphasis to your knowing. Then the discrimination is there. You are becoming old: +never say, "I am becoming old." Just say, "My body is becoming old." Then in the +moment of death also you will know, "I am not dying; my body is dying. + +I am changing bodies, just changing the house." If this discrimination deepens, one day, +suddenly, there will be enlightenment. + + +The second sutra: + + + +"HERE IS THE SPHERE OF CHANGE, CHANGE, CHANGE. THROUGH CHANGE +CONSUME CHANGE." + +The first thing to understand is that everything you know about is change; except for you, +the knower, everything is change. Have you seen anything which is not change? This +whole world is a phenomenon of change. Even the Himalayas are changing. They say — +the scientists who work on it — that they are growing; these Himalayas are the youngest +mountains in the world, still a child, really, still growing. They have not yet become +mature; they have not reached to the point from where something begins to decline. They +are still rising. + +If you compare them with Vindhyachal, another mountain, they are just children. +Vindhyachal is one of the oldest — and some say the oldest mountain in the world. It is so +old, it is decreasing — coming down. For centuries, it is coming down — just dying, in its +old age. So even a Himalaya which looks so stable, unchanging, unmoving, is changing. + +It is just a river of stones. Stones make no difference; they are also river-like, floating. +Comparatively everything is changing. Something looks more changing, something looks +less changing, but that is only relative. + +Nothing is unchanging that you can know. + +Remember my point: nothing that you can know is unchanging. Nothing is unchanging +except the knower. But that is always behind. It always "knows"; it is really never +known. It can never become the object; it is always the subject. Whatsoever you do or +know, it is always behind. You cannot know it. When I say this, don't get disturbed. + +When I say that you cannot know it, I mean you cannot know it as an object. I can look at +you, but how can I look at myself in the same way? It is impossible because to be in a +relationship of knowledge two things are needed — the knower and the known. + +So when I look at you, you are the known and I am the knower, and the knowledge can +exist as a bridge. But where to make the bridge when I look at myself, when I am trying +to know myself? There only I am, alone — totally alone. The other bank is missing, so +where to create the bridge? How to know myself? + +So self-knowledge is a negative process. You cannot know yourself directly; you can +simply go on eliminating objects of knowledge. Go on eliminating the objects of +knowledge. When there is no object of knowledge, when you cannot know anything, +when there is nothing but the vacuum, the emptiness — and this is what meditation is: just +eliminating all objects of knowledge — then a moment comes when consciousness is, but +there is nothing to be conscious of; knowing is, but there is nothing to know. + +The simple, pure energy of knowing remains and nothing is left to be known. There is no +object. + +In that state when there is nothing to be known, it is said that you know yourself in a +certain sense. But that KNOWLEDGE is totally different from all other knowledge. It is +misleading to use the same word for both. There have been mystics who have said that +self-knowledge is contradictory, the very term is contradictory. Knowledge is always of +the other; self-knowledge is not possible. But when the other is not, something happens. +You may call it "self-knowledge," but the word is misleading. + +So whatsoever you know is change. Everywhere, even these walls, are constantly +changing. Now physics supports this. Even the wall which looks so stationary, non- +changing, is changing every moment. A great flux is on. Every atom is moving, every +electron is moving. Everything is moving fast, and the movement is so fast that you + + + +cannot detect it. That is why the wall looks so permanent. In the morning it was like this, +in the afternoon it was like that, in the evening it was like this, yesterday it was like this +and tomorrow it will be like this. You look at it as if it is the same, but it is not. Your +eyes are not capable of detecting such great movement. + +The fan is there. If the fan is moving very fast, you will not be able to see the space, it +will look like just one circle. + +Space cannot be seen because the movement is fast, and if the movement is so fast — just +as fast as electrons are moving — you will not see that the fan is moving at all. You will +not be able to detect the movement. The fan will look stationary; you will even be able to +touch it. It will be stationary, and your hand will not even be able to enter into the gaps, +because your hand cannot move so fast as to go into the gaps. Before you move, another +blade will have come. Before you move, still another blade will have come. You will +always touch the blade, and the movement will be so fast that the fan will look like it is +non-moving. So things that are non-moving are very fast moving: that is why there is the +appearance that they are stationary. + +This sutra says that everything is change: "HERE IS THE SPHERE OF CHANGE..." On +this sutra Buddha's whole philosophy stands. Buddha says that everything is a flux, +changing, non-permanent, and that one should know this. Buddha's emphasis is so much +on this point. His whole standpoint is based on it. He says, "change, change, change: +remember this continuously." Why? If you can remember change, detachment will +happen. How can you be attached when everything is changing? + +You look at a face; it is very beautiful. When you look at a face that is very beautiful, +there is a feeling that this is going to remain. Understand it deeply. + +Never expect that this is going to remain. But if you know that this is changing fast, that +this is beautiful this moment and it may be ugly the next, how can you feel any +attachment? It is impossible. Look at a body: it is alive; the next moment it will be dead. +All is futile, if you feel the change. + +Buddha left his palace, his family — his beautiful wife, his child — and when someone +asked him, "Why?" he said, "Where there is nothing permanent, what is the use? The +child will die." And the night Buddha left, the child was bom. He was just a few hours +old. Buddha went into his wife's room to have a last look. The wife's back was towards +the door. She was holding the child in her arms in sleep. Buddha wanted to say goodbye, +but then he resisted. He said, "What is the use?" + +A moment came in his mind when a thought flashed that "The child is just one day old, a +few hours old, and I must have a look." But then he said, "What is the use? Everything is +changing. This day the child is bom, and the next day the child will die. And one day +before he was not here. Now he is here, and one day again he will not be here. So what is +the use? Everything is changing." He left — turned back and left. + +When someone asked, "Why have you left all that?" he said, "I am in search of that +which never changes, because if I stick to that which changes there is going to be +frustration. + +If I cling to that which is changing, I am stupid, because it will change, it will not remain +the same. Then I will be frustrated. So I am in search of that which never changes. If +there is anything which never changes, only then does life have any worth and meaning. +Otherwise everything is futile." He based his whole teaching on change. + + + +This sutra is beautiful. This sutra says, "THROUGH CHANGE CONSUME CHANGE." +Buddha would never say the second part. The second part is basically tantric. Buddha +will say that everything is change; feel it, and then you will not cling to it. And when you +don't cling to it, by and by, by leaving everything that changes, you will fall into yourself +to the center where there is no change. Just go on eliminating change, and you will come +to the unmoving, to the center — the center of the wheel. That is why Buddha has chosen +the wheel as the symbol of his religion: because the wheel moves, but the center on +which it moves remains unmoving. So the SANSARA — the world — moves like a wheel. +Your personality moves like a wheel, and your innennost essence remains the center on +which the wheel moves. It remains unmoving. + +Buddha will say life is change. He will agree with the first part. The next — the second +part — is typically tantric: "THROUGH CHANGE CONSUME CHANGE." Tantra says +don’t leave that which is changing; move into it. Don’t cling, but move. + +Why be afraid? Move into it, live it out. Allow it to happen, and you move into it. +Consume it through itself. Don’t be afraid, don’t escape. Where will you escape? How can +you escape? Everywhere there is change. Tantra says everywhere is change. Where will +you escape? Where can you go? + +Wherever you go the change will be there. All escape is futile, so don't try to escape. + +Then what to do? Don’t cling. Live the change, be the change. Don’t create any struggle +with it. Move with it. The river is flowing; you flow with it. Don't even swim; allow the +river to take you. Don't fight with it, don’t waste your energy by fighting with it; just +relax. Be in a let-go and move with the river. + +What will happen? If you can move with a river without any conflict, without any +direction of your own, if the river's direction is your direction, suddenly you will become +aware that you are not the river. You will become aware that you are not the river! Feel +it. Some day try it in a river. Go there, relax, and allow the river to take you. Don't fight; +become the river. Suddenly you will feel that the river is all around, but you are not the +river. + +In fighting you may forget this. That is why tantra says, "THROUGH CHANGE +CONSUME CHANGE." Don't fight. There is no need because in you the change cannot +enter. So don’t be afraid. Live in the world. Don’t be afraid because in you the world +cannot enter. + +Live it. Don't choose this way or that. + +There are two types of people: one that will cling to the world of change and one that will +escape. But tantra says it is change, so to cling is futile and to escape also. What is the +use? Buddha says, "What is the use of remaining in the world of change?" Tantra says, +"What is the use of escaping from it?" + +Both are futile. Rather, allow it to happen. You are not concerned with it; it is happening, +you are not even needed for it. You were not and the world was changing, and you will +not be and the world will go on changing — so why create any fuss about it? + +"CONSUME CHANGE THROUGH CHANGE." This is a very deep message. Consume +anger through anger, consume sex through sex, consume greed through greed, consume +the SANSARA through the sansara. Don't fight with it, be relaxed, because fight creates +tensions and fight creates anxiety, anguish, and you will be unnecessarily disturbed. +Allow the world to be as it is. + +There are two types of persons. One type is those persons who cannot allow the world to + + + +be as it is. They are called revolutionaries. They will change it, they will struggle to +change it. They will destroy their whole life in changing it, and it is already changing. +They are not needed, they will only consume themselves. They will bum out in changing +the world, and it is already changing. No revolution is really needed. + +The world is a revolution; it is changing. + +You may wonder why India has not created great revolutionaries. It is because of this +insight that everything is already changing. Why are you disturbed to change it? You can +neither change it nor stop the change. It IS changing. Why waste yourself? + +One type of personality always tries to change the world. In religion's eyes he is neurotic. +Really, he is afraid of coming to himself, so he goes on and becomes obsessed with the +world. The state has to be changed, the government has to be changed, the society, the +structure, the economics, everything has to be changed, and he will die, and he will never +have a moment of ecstasy in which he could know what he was, and the world will +continue and the wheel will go on moving. It has seen many revolutionaries, and it goes +on moving. Neither can you stop it nor can you accelerate the change. + +This is a mystic's attitude: mystics say there is no need to change the world. But mystics +are also of two types. One will say there is no need to change the world, but there is a +need to change oneself. He also believes in changing — not in changing the world, but +himself + +But tantra says there is no need to change anyone — neither the world nor yourself. That +is the deepest core of mysticism. You need not change the world and you need not +change yourself. You are just to know that everything is changing, and to float in the +change and relax in the change. + + +And the moment there is no effort to create any change, you can relax totally — because if +the effort is there you cannot relax. Then tension will be there because in the future +something of value is going to happen: the world is going to change. The world is going +to become communistic, or the earthly paradise is to come, or some utopia in the future, +or you are going to enter into the Kingdom of God, or into MOKSHA. Somewhere in +paradise the angels are waiting to welcome you — but "somewhere" is the future. With +this attitude you are going to be tense. + +Tantra says forget it. The world is already changing and you are also already changing. +Change is existence, so don’t become worried about it. It is already happening without +you; you are not needed. You just float in it with no anxiety for the future, and suddenly +amidst change you will become aware of a center within you which never changes, which +has remained always as it is — the same. + +Why does it happen? Because if you are relaxed, then the changing background gives you +the contrast, and through it you can feel the non-changing. If you are in any effort to +change the world or yourself, you cannot look at the small unmoving center within you. +You are so much obsessed with change, you are not able to have a look at what is the +case. + +The change is all around. The change becomes the background, the contrast, and you are +relaxed. + + +So there is no future in your mind — no future thoughts. You are here now; this moment +is all. Everything is changing, and suddenly you become aware of a point within you + + + +which has never changed. "THROUGH CHANGE CONSUME CHANGE." This is what +is meant by "THROUGH CHANGE CONSUME CHANGE." + +Don't fight. Through death become deathless; through death allow the death to die. Don’t +fight with it. The tantra attitude is difficult to conceive of, because our minds want to do +something and this is a non-doing. It is just relaxing, not doing, but this is one of the most +hidden secrets. If you can feel this, you need not bother about anything else. This one +technique can give you all. + +Then you need not do anything because you have come to know the secret that through +change, change can be consumed, and through death, death can be consumed, and +through sex, sex can be consumed, and through anger, anger can be consumed. Now you +have come to know the secret that through poison, poison can be consumed. + +THE END. + + + +Chapter 44: Tantra's secrets of love and liberation + + +The first question: + +Question 1 + +"IN REFERENCE TO YOUR STATEMENT THAT TANTRA IS A LOVE +TECHNIQUE, PLEASE EXPLAIN WHY MODERN MAN AND WOMAN HAVE +BECOME INCAPABLE OF LOVE.” + +Love is spontaneous. It cannot be controlled. You cannot "make" love; you cannot do +anything about it. And the more you do, the more you will miss it. You have to allow it to +happen. You are not needed for it. Your presence is the hindrance. The more you are +absent, the better. When you are not, love happens. Because of their inability to be +absent, modern man and woman have become incapable of love. + +They are capable of doing things. The whole modern mind is based on doing. + +Whatsoever can be done, modem man can do more efficiently than any man that has ever +existed. Whatsoever can be done, we can do more efficiently. We are the most efficient +century; we have turned everything into technology — into a problem of how to "do" it. +We have developed one dimension and that is the dimension of doing, but in developing +this dimension we have lost much. + +At the loss of being we have learned how to do things, so that which can be done we do +better than anyone — better than any society that ever existed on earth. But when the +question of love comes, a problem arises because love cannot be done. And not only is +this so with love; we have become incapable of all that cannot be done. + + +For example, meditation: we have become incapable of it; it cannot be done. Or play: we +have become incapable of it; it cannot be done. Or joy, happiness: we have become +incapable of them because they cannot be done. They are not acts; you cannot manipulate +them. On the contrary, you have to let yourself go. Then joy happens to you, then +happiness comes to you, then love enters you, then love takes possession. And because of +this possession we have become afraid. + +Modern man, the modem mind, wants to possess everything and not be possessed by +anything. Modem man wants to be the master of everything, and you can only be the +master of things — not of happenings. You can be the master of a house, you can be the +master of a mechanical device; you cannot be the master of anything which is alive. Life +cannot be mastered; you cannot possess it. On the contrary, you have to be possessed by +it. Only then is there contact with it. + +Love is life, and it is greater than you. You cannot possess it. I would like to repeat it: +love is greater than you; you cannot possess it. You can only allow yourself to be +possessed by it; it cannot be controlled. The modern ego wants to control everything, and +you become scared of whatsoever you cannot control. You become afraid; you close the +door. You close that dimension completely because fear enters. You will not be in +control. + +With love you cannot be in control, and the whole trend which has led to this century was +one of how to control. All over the world, and particularly in the West, the trend is for +how to control nature, how to control everything, how to control energies. + + + +Man must become the master, and you have become the master — of course, only of those +things which are possible to possess, and side by side you have been developing an +incapacity for those things which cannot be possessed. You can possess money; you +cannot possess love. And because of this we have been turning everything into a thing. +You even go on turning persons into things because then you can possess them. If you +love a person, you are not the master; no one is the master. Two persons love each other, +and no one is the master — neither the lover nor the beloved. Rather, love is the master +and both are possessed by a greater force than themselves, encircled by a greater force — +a whirlwind. If they try to possess each other, they will miss. Then they can possess each +other. Then the lover will become the husband and the beloved will become the wife. +Then they can possess, but a husband is a thing and a wife is a thing. They are not +persons. You can possess them. They are dead entities, legal labels — not alive. + +We go on turning persons into things just to possess them, and then we feel frustrated — +because we wanted to possess the person and the person cannot be possessed. + +When you possess a person, he is no more a person; he is a dead thing, and you cannot be +fulfilled by a dead thing. Look at this contradiction: you can be fulfilled only by persons, +never by things, but your mind desires possessions — so you turn them into things. Then +you cannot be fulfilled. Then frustration sets in. + +Possessiveness, the attitude to possess, has killed the capacity to love. Don't think in +tenns of possession. Rather, think in terms of being possessed. That is what surrender +means — being possessed: you allow yourself to be possessed by something greater than +you. Then you will not be in control. Then a greater force will take you. Then the +direction will not be yours. Then you cannot choose the goal. Then the future is +unknown; you cannot be secure now. Moving with a greater force than yourself, you are +insecure, afraid. + +If you are afraid and insecure, it is better not to move with great forces. Just work with +lower forces than you; then you can be the master, and you can decide the goal +beforehand. Then you will achieve the goal, but you will not get anything out of it. You +will have just wasted your life. + +The secret of love and the secret of prayer and the secret of anything that can make you +fulfilled is surrender — the capacity to be possessed. The problem with love exists +because this capacity is not there. There are other reasons also, but this is the base. + +The first reason is too much emphasis on intellect, reason. So man is lopsided. Your head +has grown and your heart has remained absolutely neglected. And love is not a capacity +of the intellect. It has a different center; it has a different focus, source. It is in your heart, +it is your feeling; it is not reasoning. But the whole modem education consists of +reasoning, logic, intellect, mind. The heart is not even talked about. It is denied, really; it +is just "a poetic fiction." + +It is not! It is a reality! Just look at it in this way: if from the very beginning a child is +brought up without any training of the mind or the reasoning, without any intellectual +training, will he have an intellect? He cannot! + +There have been such cases. Sometimes it has happened that wolves have brought up a +human child. Just ten years before, one child was caught in a forest. The wolves had +brought him up. He was fourteen years of age. He couldn’t even stand on two legs; he +would run on all fours. He couldn’t speak a single word; he would roar like a wolf. He +was in every way a wolf, and fourteen years of age. Those who caught him named him + + + +Ram. The child took six months to leam the name. Within a year the child died, and the +psychologists who worked on him suspected that he died because of too much strain on +the intellect. This forcing, this training to get him to stand on two feet, this memory +training to get him to remember the name, the effort to make him a human being, killed +him. + + +He was robust in health when he was caught — more healthy than any human being ever +is. He was just like an animal. But this training killed him. Every effort was made so that +if you could have asked him, "What is your name?" he would be able to say "Ram." This +was his whole intellect. After six months of constant training, punishment, creating a +profit motive in him, the only proof that the child could give of his intellect was this +much: he would be able to say "Ram." What happened? If someone from Mars could get +hold of this child, he would think that humanity has no mind, no intellect, no reason. + +The same has happened to the heart. Without training it is as if it is not. It has been +completely neglected, so your whole life energy has been forced towards the head, not +towards the heart, and love is a functioning of the heart center. This is why modem man +has become incapable of love: modem man has become incapable of the heart. He +calculates, and love is not a calculation. He knows arithmetic and love is not arithmetic. +He thinks in terms of logic and love is illogical. He always tries to rationalize everything. +Whatsoever he is doing reason must support it, and love is not supported by reason. +Really, when you fall in love you throw your reason completely. That is why we say man +"falls" in love. Falls from where? Falls from the head down into the heart. + +We use this term of condemnation, "falling in love," because the head, the reason, cannot +look at it without condemning it. It is a fall. Is love really a fall or a rising? Do you +become more with it or do you become less? Do you expand or do you shrink? With love +you become more! Your consciousness is more, your feeling is more; your ecstatic +sensation is more, your sensitivity is more. You are more alive, but one thing is less: +reasoning is less. You cannot reason it out; it is blind. As far as reason is concerned it is +blind. The heart has its own reason — that is another thing — and the heart has its own +eyes, but that is another thing. The eyes of reason are not there, so reason says it is a fall; +you have fallen. + +Unless the heart center starts functioning again man will not be capable of love, and the +whole misery of modem life is because unless he loves he cannot feel any meaning in his +life. Fife looks meaningless. Fove gives it meaning; love is the only meaning. Unless you +are capable of love you will be meaningless, and you will feel that you are existing +without any meaning, futilely, and suicide will become attractive. Then you will like to +kill yourself, to finish with yourself, to end, because what is the use of existing? + +Mere existing cannot be tolerated. Existence must have a meaning; otherwise, what is the +use? Why go on prolonging yourself unnecessarily? Why go on repeating the same +pattern every day? Getting out of the bed and doing the same thing, and again falling +asleep and the next day the same pattern: why? + +You have done it so far, and what has happened? And you will do it unless death comes +and relieves of you of your body. + + +So what is the use? Fove gives meaning. It is not that through love any result comes into +being or any goal — no! Through love every moment becomes of value in itself. Then you + + + +never ask this. If someone asks what is the meaning of life, know well that love is +lacking. Whenever someone asks what is the meaning of life, he is asking because he has +not been able to flower in a love experience. Whenever someone is in love, he never asks +what is the meaning of life. He knows the meaning; there is no need to ask. He knows the +meaning! The meaning is there: love is the meaning in life. + +And through love prayer is possible because prayer is again a love relationship — not +between two individuals, but between one individual and existence itself. Then the whole +existence becomes your beloved or lover. But it is possible only through love experience +that you can grow into prayer or into meditation, and the ultimate ecstasy is just like love. +That is why Jesus says that "God is love," not that "God is loving." + +Christians have been interpreting it in this way — that God is kind, loving. That is not the +meaning. Jesus says that God is love. He simply equates God and love. You can say +"love" or you can say "God"; they both mean the same. God is not loving; God is love +itself. If you can love, you have entered the divine. And when your love grows to such an +infinity that it is not concerned with anyone in particular — rather, it has become a +diffused phenomenon; when there is no lover for you — rather, the whole existence, all +that is, has become the lover or beloved — then it has become prayer. + + +And tantra is a love method. So the first thing is how to love, and then the second thing is +how to grow in love so that love becomes prayer. But one must start from love. And don’t +be afraid of love because that fear shows you are afraid of the heart. The head is cunning; +the heart is innocent. With the head you feel protected; with the heart you become +vulnerable, open. Anything can happen. + +That is why we have become closed. The fear is there: if you are vulnerable, anything can +happen to you; someone can deceive you. With the mind no one can deceive you; you +can deceive others. But I tell you be ready to be deceived, but don’t close the heart. Be +ready to be deceived, but don’t close the heart! That vulnerability to be deceived is of +worth because you will not lose anything by it. And if you are ready to be deceived +infinitely, only then can you believe in the heart. If you are calculative, cunning, clever, +too much clever, then you will miss the heart, and modem man is so educated, so +sophisticated, so clever; that is why he has become incapable of love. + +Women were not like this, but they are following modem man fast, they are copying +modern man fast. Sooner or later they will become just like man, or they may even +overtake him. Now they are also becoming incapable because the same head orientation, +the same effort to be cunning and clever, is there now. + +They may form a "Women's Liberation Movement" or anything like it, but it is not heart +oriented. It is just a copy of the same stupidity that man has been doing with himself. You +may go to the other extreme, but if you react, even in your reaction you are following. + +A great crisis is there. It is difficult now to prevent women all over the world from +copying man and his nonsense because man seems to be so successful. He is successful +in a way; he has become the master of things. Now he possesses the whole world. Now +he feels he has conquered nature, and "success succeeds; nothing succeeds like success." +Now women feel that man has succeeded and has become the master, so they must copy +him. But look also at the thing in which man has failed completely. He has lost his heart; +he cannot love. Reason alone is not enough, and reason in control is dangerous. The heart +must be higher than reason because reason is just an instrument and the heart is you. The + + + +heart must be allowed to use reason — not vice versa. But you have been doing that. The +head is allowed to dominate; in its domination, the head has killed the heart. + +And thirdly, one thing more has to be remembered as to why modern man has become +incapable of love. Love is basically a sort of madness, a sort of deep participation with +nature, a sort of dissolving of the ego. It is primal. You are bom out of love; your every +cell of the body is a love cell. + +Your very energy, your life energy, is a love energy. You exist in it, but there is no ego in +that energy. You cannot feel "I." That energy is unconscious, and when you move in love +YOU become unconscious. Only a fragment of your mind is conscious, and in that +fragment of the mind exists the ego. + +The mind has three layers. First is the unconscious: when you are deeply asleep with no +dreams, you are in it. The child in the mother's womb is absolutely unconscious, he is just +part of the mother. The child is not aware that "I am separate"; he is just part of the +mother. There is no separation, no defined existence. He is undifferentiated from the +mother and from the existence itself. There is no fear because fear comes only when you +become aware of yourself. The child is totally at ease; he is unconscious. + +And the second layer is of consciousness. It is a very small fragment. One tenth part of +the unconscious has become conscious in you through training, education, society, +family. It was needed for survival, so a part of you has become conscious. But that part +also gets tired very soon; that is why you need sleep. In sleep you become again a child +in the womb. You have fallen back, the conscious is no more there. It has become part of +the unconscious. That is why sleep is so refreshing. In the morning you feel alive again, +fresh, because you have fallen back into the mother's womb. + + +You may not have observed this.... Observe someone who is deeply asleep. More or less, +he will be in the same posture in which he was in his mother's womb. And if you can be +in the right posture, sleep will follow more easily. If you feel any difficulty in falling +asleep, just feel your mother's womb, as if you are in it. Imagine it, and take the posture +in which you would have been in your mother's womb. In that posture you will fall +deeply asleep. You need the same warmth; otherwise the sleep will be disturbed. You +need the same wannth as there was in your mother's womb. + +That is why hot milk is good. If you sip hot milk before you go to sleep it will be good, +because that again makes you a child. Milk is child’s food, and if it is hot you are again at +your mother's breast. Hot milk is good for sleep only because of this reason: you fall back +into childhood, you are reduced into a child. Sleep refreshes you. Why? Because the +conscious mind gets tired. It is just a part, and the whole is unconscious. It has to fall +back to the whole to become revived. It is again resurrected. That is why in the morning +you feel good and morning looks beautiful — not only because morning is beautiful, but +because again you have a child's eyes. The afternoon is not so beautiful. The world is the +same, but you have lost those innocent eyes again. And the evening becomes ugly +because you are tired. + + +You have lived too much in the conscious. This conscious has ego as the center. These +are two ordinary states which we know. The third state, that with which tantra and yoga +are concerned, is the superconscious. "Superconscious" means that your whole + + + +unconscious has become conscious. In the unconscious there is no ego; you are total. In +the superconscious, again there is no ego; you are total. But in between the two the +conscious mind has a center — the ego. This ego is the problem, this ego creates +problems. You cannot fall in love because then you will have to become unconscious, +just as unconscious as you become in sleep. Or, if you want to rise to prayer, you have to +become totally conscious like a Buddha or like a Meera. So love becomes impossible, +prayer becomes impossible. + +The ego creates the barrier. Y ou cannot lose yourself, and love is losing, dispersing, +dissolving, melting. If you melt into the unconscious, it is love; if you melt into the +superconscious it is prayer — but both are a melting. So what is to be done? Remember +this: you cannot do anything about it. Let it be deeply noted: you cannot do anything +about love, about prayer. Your conscious mind is impotent; it cannot do anything. It has +to be lost, it has to be put aside. And then remember surrender: whenever you want to +move beyond yourself, surrender is the way — either in love or in prayer. + + +Whenever you long to move beyond, somewhere else where you are not, then surrender, +let-go is the path. Allow something to happen to you; don’t manipulate. And once you +know how to allow, many things will start happening. You may not be even aware of +what is possible for you, of what a great, tremendous energy you have closed within +yourself which can explode and then become an ecstasy. Your whole life will be filled +with consciousness, light and bliss, but you don’t know it. It is just as if every atom is an +atom bomb: if one atom explodes, tremendous energy is released. And every heart is also +an atom bomb. If it explodes in love or prayer, tremendous energy is released. + +But you have to explode and lose yourself. The seed has to lose itself; only then is the +tree born. And if the seed resists and says, "No, I must survive," then the seed can +survive, but the tree will never be born. And unless the tree is bom the seed will feel +frustrated, because the tree is the meaning. The seed will feel frustrated! The seed can +feel fulfilled only when the tree is there flowering. But then the seed has to lose itself, +die. + +Modern man has become incapable of love because he has become incapable of death. + +He cannot die to anything. He clings to life; he cannot die to anything. + +In old English, three or four hundred years ago, this was a usual expression. The lover +would say to the beloved, "I want to die in you." + +This was a love expression. It is beautiful! "I want to die in you." Love is a death — a +death of the ego. Only then is your real self born, and modem man is very, very afraid of +death. In every way, surrender is death, love is death, and life also is a continuous death. +If you are afraid, you will miss life itself. + +Be ready to die every moment. Die to the past, die to the future, and die in the present +moment. Don’t cling and don't resist. Don’t make any effort for life, and you will have +abundant life. Life will happen to you if you are ready to die. This looks paradoxical, but +this is the law. Jesus says that one who is ready to lose will gain, and one who clings will +lose everything. + +The second question: + +Question 2 + +"YOU SAID LAST NIGHT THAT THE PERIPHERY IS ALWAYS CHANGING, + + + +WHEREAS THE INNERMOST CENTER IS ETERNALLY UNMOVING. TO +REALIZE THE CENTER IS IT NECESSARY THAT THE PERIPHERAL +MOVEMENT MUST CEASE? CAN THAT BE? HOW AND WHEN?" + + +You have missed the whole point. The whole point was not to make any effort to change +the periphery. Allow the periphery to be as it is. And you cannot change it. It is the nature +of the periphery to move and change. You cannot make it static. Nature is a flux. It is so; +you cannot make it static. And don’t waste your time and opportunity of life trying to +make it static. Just know it as change. + +Be the witness of it, and you will come to feel the innermost center which is not change. +The world is change, your personality is change, your body -mind is change, but you are +not; you are not the change. What is the use of struggling with change? No need! + +Tantra says please be reestablished in your center, be aware of the center which is +unmoving, and allow the whole existence to move. It is not a disturbance at all. It +becomes a disturbance only if you cling to it or if you try to make it unmoving. Then you +are falling into absurdities, foolish efforts. They will not succeed; you will be a failure. +Know well that life is a change, but somewhere within this change there is an unmoving +center also. Just become aware of it. That very awareness is enough to liberate you. That +very feeling that "I am unmoving" liberates. That is the truth. You know it, and you are +different. + +Don't fight with shadows! And the whole life is a shadow because change is nothing but a +shadow. The unchanging is the real; the changing is the unreal. So don’t ask whether the +peripheral change and movement has to be forced to cease in order to realize the center. +There is no need, and you cannot force it. It cannot cease! The world goes on; only it will +not go on in you. You can remain in the world, and there is no need for the world to be in +you. The world is not the disturbance. When you get involved in it, when you become the +change, when you feel that you have become the change, then it creates problems. + + +Problems are created not by the changing periphery. They are created by the +identification that "I am this change." You have fallen ill; illness is not really the +disturbance. When you feel that "I have fallen ill," it is a disturbance. If you can be a +witness to that illness, if you can feel that illness is a happening somewhere on the +periphery — that it is not happening to you, it is happening to someone else and you are +just the witness — then death also can happen and you will be just a witness. + +Alexander was returning from India. Some friends had requested him to bring back a +sannyasin from India. They said, "When you come with conquered possessions, don't +forget: bring a sannyasin also. We want to see what a sannyasin is — what type of a man +renounces the world. We want to know what has happened to one who has renounced all +desires, what type of bliss comes to one who leaves all hankering, thirst or hunger for the +future, for possessions and things." + +Just at the last moment Alexander remembered. In the last town from where he was to +leave India to go back to his country, he told his soldiers to go and find a sannyasin. They +went to the town, and they asked an old man of the town. He said, "Yes there is a +sannyasin, a great sannyasin, but it will be difficult. It will be very difficult to persuade +him to go with Alexander to Athens." + +But the soldiers were soldiers, so they said, "Don’t you be worried about it. + + + +We can force anyone. Just tell us where he is. We know how to force him, so there is no +need to persuade. If Alexander tells even the whole town to follow him, you will have to +follow, so what of a single sannyasin?" + +But the old man laughed, and the soldiers couldn't understand because they had never +encountered a sannyasin. They reached the sannyasin. He was standing naked on the +bank of the river, and they told him, "Alexander orders that you have to come with us. +Every care will be taken, there will be no inconvenience for you; you will be the royal +guest. But you have to come with us to Athens." + +The sannyasin laughed and he said, "It will be very difficult for your Alexander to take +me with him. No force in this world can force me to follow. You will not be able to +understand, but it is better that you bring your Alexander." + +Alexander was disturbed. He felt insulted, but he wanted to see this man. He came with a +naked sword and he said, "If you say no, then immediately you lose your life. I will cut +your head." The name of the sannyasin was — as it is reported in Alexander's records — +Dandami. + +The sannyasin laughed and said, "You came a little late. You cannot kill me now because +I have killed myself already. You are a little late. You can cut my head, but you cannot +cut me because I have become a witness. So when this head will fall down on the earth, +you will see it falling down and I will also see it falling down. + +But you cannot cut me; you cannot even touch me. So don’t waste time, you can cut! + +Raise your sword and cut my head." + +Alexander couldn’t kill that man. It was impossible because it was useless. The man was +so beyond death, it was impossible to kill him. You can only be killed if you cling to life. +That clinging to the changing pattern makes you a mortal. If you don’t cling, you are as +you have always been — immortal. Immortality is your birthright; it has always been +there. You become a mortal only if you cling. So there is no question, there is no need to +force the changing periphery to be static. There is no need, and you CANNOT make it +static. It will go on, the wheel will go on. All that you can do is to know that you are not +the wheel. You are the axis, not the wheel. + +The third question: + +Question 3 + +"MAN BEING AS HE IS, IS IT NOT DIFFICULT FOR HIM TO DISSOLVE CHANGE +THROUGH CHANGE, SEX THROUGH SEX, ETCETERA, WITHOUT +ATTACHMENTS AND WITH THEIR CONSEQUENT ANXIETY AND +DISAPPOINTMENT?" + +Man as he is CAN do this, and this is suggested ONLY for man as he is. Tantra is a +medicine for YOU — for those who are ill. So don’t think that it is not for you. It is for +you and you can do it, but you will have to understand what is meant when you say that +there is the possibility of falling into attachments, and then the consequences will be +there and frustration. + +You have not understood. "Consume change through change" means that even if there is +attachment don’t fight with it. Be attached, but be a witness also. + +Let the attachment be there; don't fight with it. Tantra is a non-fighting process. Don’t +fight! Frustration will come, of course, so be frustrated. But be a witness also. You were + + + +attached, and you were a witness. Now the frustration has come, and you know well that +it had to come. Now be frustrated, but be a witness. Then through attachment, attachment +is consumed, and through frustration, frustration is consumed. + +Try this when you feel miserable. Be miserable; don't fight with it. Try this, it is +wonderful. When there is misery and you feel miserable, close your doors and be +miserable. Now what can you do? You are miserable, so you are miserable. Now be +totally miserable. Suddenly you will become aware of the misery. And if you try to +change it you will never become aware, because your effort, your energy, your +consciousness is directed towards change, towards how to change this misery. Then you +start thinking about how it came, and what to do now to change it. Then you are missing +a very beautiful experience — the misery itself. + +Now you are thinking about the causes and you are thinking about the consequences and +you are thinking about the method for how to forget it, how to go beyond it, and you are +missing misery itself, and misery is there and that can be liberating. + +Just don’t do anything. Don’t analyze how the misery is created; don’t think about what +consequences are going to follow. They will follow, so you can see later on. There is no +haste. Be miserable, simply miserable, and don’t try to change it. + +Try this: see for how many minutes you can remain miserable. You will start laughing +about the whole thing; the whole thing will look stupid, because if you are totally +miserable, suddenly your center is beyond misery. That center can never be miserable, it +is impossible! If you remain with the misery, the misery becomes the background, and +your center which can never be miserable suddenly rises above, and then you are +miserable and you are not miserable: the "same unsame." Now you are consuming misery +through misery. This is what is meant. You are not doing anything; you are simply +consuming misery through misery. Misery will disappear as clouds disappear, and the +sky will be open and you will be laughing, and you have not done anything. And you +cannot do anything; all that you can do will create more confusion and more misery. + +Who has created this misery? You, and now you are trying to change it. It will get worse. +You are the creator of the misery. You have created it, you are the source, and now the +source itself is trying. What can you do? Now the patient is treating himself, and he has +created the whole thing. Now he is thinking of surgery. + +It is suicidal. Don't do anything. The inside is very deep. You have tried so many times to +stop misery, to stop depression, to stop this and that, and nothing has happened. Now try +this: don’t do anything; allow the misery to be there in its totality. Allow it to happen in +its full intensity, and remain non-doing. Just be with it and see what happens. + +Life is change. Even the Himalayas are changing, so your misery cannot be unchanging. + +It will change by itself, and you will see that it is changing — that it is disappearing and it +is going away, and you feel unburdened and you have not done anything. + +Once you know the secret you can consume anything through itself, but the secret is to be +silently without doing anything. Anger is there, so be, just BE. Don’t do anything. If you +can do this much, this "non-doing," if you can just be there — present, witnessing, but +making no effort to change anything — allowing things to have their own way, you will +consume anything. You CAN consume anything. + +The last question: + +Question 4 + + + +"TANTRA SAYS DO NOT STRUGGLE OR SWIM, BUT LET GO AND FLOAT IN +THE RIVER OF LIFE. BUT EXPERIENCE SHOWS THAT THE MODERN CITY +LIFE OF SPEED AND HEAVY TECHNOLOGY CREATES CONSTANT TENSIONS +AND EXERTIONS PHYSICALLY AND MENTALLY. WHAT WILL BE TANTRA’S +ATTITUDE ABOUT IT? IS IT NOT GOOD TO AVOID UNNECESSARY +EXERTIONS?" + +Life has always been so, modem or primitive. + +Tensions are there, anxieties are there. Objects change, but man remains the same. Two +thousand years back you were driving a bullock cart; now you are driving a car — but the +driver remains the same. The bullock cart has changed — things are different now, you +are driving a car — but the driver remains the same. He was anxious about his cart, tense +about his cart; now you are tense and anxious about your car. Objects change, but the +mind remains the same. + +So don’t think that because of the modern life you are so much in anxiety. It is because of +you, not because of modern life, and you will be in anxiety anywhere, in any type of +civilization. Go to a village for a few days — two or three days — and you will feel good +for a while because even diseases need readjustment. But within three days you will be +adjusted to the village, and then anxieties will start coming, disturbances will be felt +again. Now the causes will not be the same, but you are the same. + +Sometimes it happens that you may be disturbed because of city traffic and noise, and +you may be saying that you cannot sleep at night because there is so much traffic and +noise. Then go to a village, and you will not be able to sleep because there is no traffic +and no noise. You will have to come back because the village looks dead, dull — because +there is no life. + +People go on reporting such feelings to me. + +I told one friend to go to Kashmir, to Pahalgam. He came back and said that life is dull +there, that there is no life. You can enjoy for one or two days valleys and hills, and then +one gets bored. He had been telling me here that city life was getting on his nerves, and +now he said that those hills were getting boring and he began longing to come back +home. + +You are the problem; Kashmir will not be of any help. It is not Bombay that disturbs you +or London or New York; it is YOU! And it is not that London has created you: you have +created London. It is not the traffic and the noise and the mad rush: you have created this +— you and others like you. Look! The cause is within you. It is not that you are tense +because of noise. The noise is there because you are tense, and you cannot live without it. +That is why it is there. You need it, you cannot live without it. And in villages people are +suffering. They want to come to Bombay or to New York or to London, and the moment +they get the opportunity they run. And I have been listening to people who go on talking +about the beautiful village life, but they never go to live there. They NEVER go to live +there, they simply talk about it. + +Who prevents you? Why not go? Go to the forest — who prevents you? You will not like +it, you cannot like it. Right now you will like it for a few days because it is a change, and +then? Then you will get bored. + + +You will find it dull, and you will like to escape from there. + + + +This city life is created by your mad mind. You are not becoming mad because of these +cities; these cities are built because of your mad mind. They are built for you and by you, +and they exist for you. And unless this mad mind changes, these cities cannot disappear, +they will have to remain. They are your by-product. + +Remember one thing: whenever you feel that something is wrong, first find out the cause +in yourself. Don't go anywhere. Out of a hundred times, ninety-nine times you will find +the cause within yourself. And if you find the cause within you, ninety-nine times out of +a hundred, the hundredth cause will disappear by itself. + +You are the cause of whatsoever is happening to you. YOU are the cause, and the world +is just a mirror. But it is consolatory always to find the cause somewhere else. Then you +never feel guilt, you never feel self-condemned. You can always point out that here is the +cause, and unless this cause changes, "How can I change?" You can escape into it; this is +a trick. So your mind always goes on projecting causes somewhere else. The wife is +disturbed because of the husband; the mother is disturbed because of the children; the +children are disturbed because of the father. Everyone is disturbed because of someone +else, and everyone always thinks that the cause exists outside. + + +Mulla Nasruddin was passing down a street. It was evening, and the darkness was +descending. Suddenly he became aware that the street was empty with no traffic, and he +became afraid. A group of people were coming toward him, and he was reading about +DACOITS, robbers, murderers. So he created fear, he started trembling. He thought, he +projected, that now these murderers and dacoits were coming, and they were bound to +kill him, so how to escape them? He looked all around. + +There was a cemetery, so he jumped over the wall of the cemetery. There was a ready- +made grave for someone, so he thought that it would be good to be dead in this grave. +They will feel that he is dead, so there won’t be any need to murder him. + +So Mulla lay down. The group was just a marriage procession, but they saw this man +trembling and jumping. Then they became afraid and wondered what was the matter and +who this man was. They thought, "He seems to be up to some mischief. He is hiding +there." So the whole procession stopped, and they jumped over the wall. Mulla became +more afraid. Now they came near and they asked, "What are you doing here? Why are +you here in this grave?" + +So Mulla said, "You are asking a very difficult question. I am here because of you and +you are here because of me." + +And this is happening everywhere. You are disturbed because of someone else; he is +disturbed because of you. + +And you are just creating everything around you, projecting, and then becoming afraid, +scared, and making efforts to defend. And then there is misery and frustration and +conflict and depression and fighting. + +The whole thing is stupid, and it will remain unless you change your attitude. And always +try first to find the cause within you. How can the traffic noise disturb you? How? If you +are against it, it will disturb. If you have the attitude that it disturbs, it will disturb. But if +you accept it, if you allow it to happen without any reaction, then you may even start +enjoying it. It has its own melody, its own music. You have not heard it, but that doesn’t +mean that it doesn't have its own music. Someday forget yourself and listen to the traffic +noise. Just listen, and don't bring in your attitudes that this is disturbing, that this is not + + + +good. Don’t bring in your attitudes, just listen to the melody! In the beginning it will look +chaotic. That too is because of the mind. If you relax totally, sooner or later everything +will fit into a harmonious whole and even the traffic noise will become music. You can +enjoy it and you can dance to its tune. It depends on you. + +Nothing disturbs unless you think that it disturbs. For example I will tell you that many +things have disturbed humanity because there was a certain concept that they disturb. +When the concept changes the things remain the same, but they don’t disturb. + +For example, masturbation disturbed the whole world. Just half a century before, the +whole world was disturbed by masturbation. Every teacher, every father, every mother +was disturbed, and every child was disturbed. And still in the larger, ignorant world, the +disturbance remains. And then physiologists and psychologists discovered that +masturbation cannot disturb anyone; it is natural, and nothing is wrong with it. There is +absolutely nothing wrong with it, but the old teaching was that if you become mad, it was +because of masturbation. + +Everything was forced down, reduced to masturbation. And more or less every child was +doing it, every boy was doing it, so every boy was afraid. He was doing it, and he was +afraid that now he was going to be mad, inferior, crazy, eccentric, ill, and his life would +be wasted. But he couldn't resist. He had to do it, and these ideas entered into the mind +and had effects. They affected him, and many went mad, many remained inferior, many +remained stupid because of it, and it has no relationship at all. + +Modern science, modern research says that rather it is healthy. Medical science says that +it is good because a boy at the age of thirteen or fourteen or a girl at the age of twelve or +thirteen becomes sexually mature. If nature were allowed they would have to get married +immediately. They are ready to reproduce, but civilization of necessity forces that they +will have to remain unmarried for ten years at least or even more. + +But medicine says that fourteen to twenty, these six years, are the most sexually potent. A +boy is never so potent again as he is then. The energy is bubbling up; the whole body is +ready to burst into sex. But the society says no, the energy should not be allowed to +move. However, the energy is moving and the child cannot do anything, and whatsoever +he is going to do will have effects because of the philosophy around him. He will feel he +is doing something wrong, he will feel guilt, and that guilt will follow like a shadow. And +many diseases will happen because of the idea, not because of the act. + +Medicine says that it is healthy because he is relieved of unnecessary energy. That +unnecessary energy would create problems otherwise, so it is healthy. Now, particularly +in America and England and other Western developed countries who know much more +about physiology, masturbation is being propagated. Now there are films on how to +masturbate to show to the children, and every teacher will be teaching sooner or later +how to masturbate rightly. They say it is healthy, and now those who think it is healthy +feel very healthy about it. + +I don't think it is either — it is neither healthy nor unhealthy. The idea is the thing. If it is +healthy and the concept is stretched, it will become healthy. Now in the West they say +not only that masturbation never affected anyone's intelligence adversely, but that the +better the intelligence, the more masturbation will be there. + +So a boy who is masturbating more will be of higher I.Q. than the boy who is not +masturbating. And they have reasons for saying this, because even for a boy to discover + + + +masturbation is a sign of intelligence: he is finding out a way. + +The society has closed the door for marriage, and the nature is forcing the energy. The +intelligent one will find a way and the non-intelligent one will just be blocked, he will not +be able to find the way. Now the studies show that those boys who masturbate are more +intelligent. If this idea is spread, and it is bound to be there, sooner or later the whole +world will be having this idea. Then masturbation will be healthy, and you will feel a +well-being from it. + +Now every parent is afraid because the parent knows what he did when he was young. +When his boy comes to the same age, he becomes afraid and he starts looking around at +what the boy is doing. He is afraid, and if he catches the boy he will punish him. But the +new knowledge says don’t punish the boy — no! Rather, teach him. If he is not +masturbating, then go to the doctor and find out what is wrong. If this knowledge +becomes well spread, then this will happen. + +But both are positions. BOTH are positions! And when some boy masturbates, he is very +suggestive in that moment — because when sexual energy is being released, he becomes +vulnerable, open, flexible, and his mind is silent. + +Any idea put in at that moment will have its effects — so if you tell him, "You are going +to be ill because of it," he will feel ill. If you tell him, "You are going to be healthy +because of it," he will become healthy. If you say to him, "You will be stupid for your +whole life if you do this," he will remain a dunce. If you say, "Now this is a good sign of +intelligence," he may develop a higher I.Q. You are simply suggesting something to him +in a very vulnerable moment. Whatsoever you think starts happening. + +Buddha is reported to have said that every thought will become actual, so be aware. If +you think that the traffic noise disturbs you, it will disturb you: you are ready for +disturbance. If you think that a family life is a bondage, it will be a bondage for you: you +are ready for this. If you think that poverty will help to make you liberated, it will help. +Ultimately it is you who is creating a world around you, and whatsoever you think +becomes the noosphere, the milieu, and you exist in it. + +Tantra says remember this causality, it is always within you. And if you know this, then +you will not cause anything. If you know this, you will not cause anything for yourself. +And when someone is not causing anything, he is liberated. Then he is not in misery and +not in bliss. Bliss is your creation and misery is also your creation. You can change your +misery into bliss because it is your creation. + + +The liberated one, the enlightened one, is really in neither because he has ceased to cause +anything around him. He simply is! That is why Buddha never says that the enlightened +one is blissful. Whenever someone asked him, "Tell us something about someone who +has gone beyond — whether he is in perfect bliss," Buddha laughed and said, "Don't ask. I +can say only this much, that he is not in misery. I cannot say anything more. He is not in +misery; that is all I can say." + +Why so much insistence on the negative? Because Buddha knows. When you have come +to know that you were the cause of your misery, then you know well that the bliss also +was caused by you. Then one ceases to cause anything. That is what NIRVANA is: a +cessation of causing anything around you. Then you are, simply — no misery, no bliss. If +you can understand, only this is bliss. There is no misery and no bliss, because if there is +bliss then misery is there; you are still causing something. And if you can cause bliss, + + + +then you can cause misery, and you will become bored of the bliss also. + +How much can you stand it — how much? Have you ever thought about it? Twenty-four +hours in bliss: will you be able to stand it? You will become bored, and you will go on +seeking teachers who can teach you how to become miserable again. If the world +becomes blissful, I cannot conceive that there won’t be any teachers. + +There will be teachers, because then people will need misery. Someone will be needed to +tell them how to become miserable again, just for a change. Then you can go back to +your bliss, and you will feel it more — because only then can you feel it more, when you +have missed it. + +Teachers will be there! Now they are teaching how to become blissful; then they will +teach how to become miserable, how to have a taste of hell. A little change will be +helpful, healthy. + +But you are the cause, and you will become enlightened the moment you have kn own +that the world you are living in was caused by you. When you will not cause it, it will +have disappeared. The traffic will go on, the noise will be there, and everything will be +there as it is, but you will not be there because you will have disappeared with the cause. + + +THE END. + + + +Chapter 45: Remaining with the real + + +AS A HEN MOTHERS HER CHICKS, MOTHER PARTICULAR KNOWINGS, +PARTICULAR DOINGS, IN REALITY. + +SINCE, IN TRUTH, BONDAGE AND FREEDOM ARE RELATIVE, THESE WORDS +ARE ONLY FOR THOSE TERRIFIED WITH THE UNIVERSE. THIS UNIVERSE IS +A REFLECTION OF MINDS. AS YOU SEE MANY SUNS IN WATER FROM ONE +SUN, SO SEE BONDAGE AND LIBERATION. + +Hui-neng had asked a person, "What is the problem? What are the roots so that man can +be solved and man can make some efforts to know who he is?" + +Why shouldn’t he know without any effort? Why should there be any problem at all? Y ou +are, you know you are — so why can't you know who you are? Where do you miss? You +are conscious. You are conscious that you are conscious. A life is there; you are alive. +Why are you not aware who you are? What becomes the barrier? What prevents you from +this basic self-knowledge? If you can understand the barrier, the barrier can be dissolved +very easily. + +So the real question is not how to know oneself. The real question is to know how you +are not knowing yourself, how you are missing such an obvious reality, such a basic truth +which is so near to you, how you go on not seeing. You must have created a device; +otherwise it is difficult to escape from oneself. You must have created walls; you must, in +some sense, be deceiving yourself. + +So what is that trick of escaping from oneself, of not knowing oneself? If you don’t +understand that trick, whatsoever you do will not be of any help — because the trick +remains, and you go on asking how to know oneself, how to know the truth, how to know +the reality, and consequently you go on helping the barrier. + +You go on creating it also, so whatsoever you do will be of no use. + +Really, nothing positive is needed to know oneself, only something negative. In a way, +you have only to destroy the barrier that you yourself have constructed, and the moment +that barrier is not there you will know. Knowing happens when the barrier is not; you +cannot make any positive effort for it. You have just to be aware of how you are missing +it. + +So a few things have to be understood as to how you are missing it. One: you live in your +dreams, and then dreams become barriers. Reality is not a dream. It is there, you are +surrounded by it everywhere. Inside and outside, it is there — you cannot miss it — but +you are dreaming. Then you move in a different dimension which is not a reality. Then +you go on moving in a dreamworld. Then dreams become like clouds around you, and +they create the barrier. Unless mind ceases dreaming, the truth cannot be known. And +when you see through dreams the reality is distorted, and your eyes are fdled with +dreams, and your ears are filled with dreams, and your hands are filled with dreams. + +So whatsoever you touch is touched through the dreams, and whatsoever you see is seen +through dreams, and whatsoever you hear is heard through the dreams, and you distort +everything. Whatsoever reaches you, reaches through dreams, and they change +everything, they color everything. + +Because of the dreaming mind you are missing the reality outside and the reality inside. + + + +You can go on finding ways and means how to come to reality, but you will be trying that +too through your dreaming mind. So you can dream religious dreams — you can dream +dreams about reality, about truth, about God, about Christ and Buddha — but that too will +be dreaming. Dreaming must cease, and dreaming cannot be used to know reality. + +What do I mean when I say "dreaming"? You are hearing right now, but a dream is there, +and that dream is constantly interpreting what is being said. You are not hearing me; you +are hearing yourself, because simultaneously you are interpreting — are you not? You are +thinking about what is being said. What is the need to think? Just hear, don’t think, +because if you think you cannot hear, and if you go on thinking and hearing, then +whatsoever you hear is your own noise. Then it is not what is being said. Stop thinking; +let the passage of hearing be clear of thoughts. Then that which is said will be heard. +When looking at the flower, stop dreaming. Don't allow your eyes to be filled with +thoughts and dreams about the past and future, with what you know about flowers. Don't +even say that "This flower is beautiful," because then you are missing the reality. These +words will become a barrier. You say, "This flower is beautiful," and words have come +in: the reality is interpreted through the words. + +Don't allow words to gather around you. Look directly, hear directly and touch directly. +When you touch someone, just touch; don’t say that the skin is beautiful, smooth. Then +you are missing, you have moved in dream. Whatsoever the skin is, it is here now. Touch +it and allow the skin itself to be revealed to you. You look at a beautiful face. Look at it, +and allow the face to enter itself. Don’t interpret it, don't say anything. Don’t bring your +past mind in. + +The first thing: dreams are created by your past mind. It is the past mind continuously +moving around you. Don't allow the past to come in and then don’t allow the future. The +moment you see a beautiful face, a beautiful body, immediately desire arises. You want +to possess. You see a beautiful flower and you want to pluck it. Then you have moved. +The flower is there, but you have moved into desire, into the future. Now you are not +here. So either you are in the past which is not, or you are in the future which has not +come yet, and you are missing that which is there right now. + +So the first thing to remember: words should not be allowed to exist between you and +reality. With less words there are less barriers; with no words there are no barriers. And +then you face reality directly; immediately you are face to face. Words destroy +everything because they change the very meaning. + +I was reading someone's biography. + +She was describing one day after just coming out of her bed. The woman writes that +"One day, in the morning, I opened my eyes." Then immediately, she says, "But it is not +right to say that I opened my eyes. T didn’t do anything. The eyes opened by +themselves." She changes the sentence and she writes, "No, it is not good to say that I +opened my eyes. I did not do anything. There was no effort on my part; it was not an +action at all." Then she writes, "The eyes opened by themselves." But then she feels this +is too absurd because the eyes belong to her, so how can they open themselves? So what +to do? + +Language never says what is. If you say, "I opened my eyes," it is a lie. If you say, "The +eyes opened by themselves," it is a lie again, because eyes are just fragments. They +cannot open themselves. The whole organism is involved. And whatsoever we say is like +that. If you go to aboriginal societies in India — and there are many aboriginal tribes — + + + +they have a different language structure. Their language structure is more basic and more +real, but they cannot create much poetry. Their language structure cannot be helpful for +dreaming. + +If it is raining, we say, "It is raining." They ask, "What do you mean by 'it'? What do you +mean by 'it'?" They have simply the word rain. What do you mean by "it"? What is +raining? They just say "rain." Rain is the reality, but we go on adding things — and the +more words are added, the more we are lost, far away, thrown far away from reality. + + +Buddha used to say, "When you say, 'A man is walking,’ what do you mean? Where is +the man? Only the walking is. What do you mean by 'the man’?" When we say, "A man +is walking," it appears that there is something like a man and something like walking — +two things added together. Buddha says there is walking. + +When you say, "The river is flowing," what do you mean? There is just flowing, and that +flowing is the river. The walking is the man, the seeing is the man, standing and sitting is +the man. If you eliminate all these — walking, sitting, standing, thinking, dreaming — will +there be a man left behind? There will be no man behind. But language creates a different +world, and by constantly moving into words we go on moving away. + +So the first thing to remember is how not to allow words unnecessarily. When there is a +need, you can use them, but when there is no need remain empty, remain non-verbal, +MOUNA, remain silent. There is no need to be constantly verbalizing things. + +Secondly, don’t project. Don’t verbalize, don’t project. Look at what is there. Don’t add +things and then look. You see a face. When you say, "It is beautiful," you are putting +something into it, or if you say, "It is ugly," you are again putting something into it. A +face is a face. Beauty and ugliness are your interpretations. They are not there, because +the same face may be beautiful to someone and ugly to someone else, and to a third it +may be neither. + +He may be indifferent; he may not even look at it — at the same face. The face is simply a +face. Don’t put things into it; don’t project. Your projections are your dreams, and if you +project then you miss. And this is happening every day. + +You see that a face is beautiful; then desire is created. The desire is not for that face or +that body; it is for your own interpretation, your own projection. The person that is there, +the real person, has been used as a screen, and you have projected yourself. And then +disillusion is bound to be there because the real face cannot be forced into unreality by +your projection. Sooner or later the projection will have to be dropped, and the real face +will come out, and then you will feel that you have been cheated. You will say, "What +has happened to this face? This face was so beautiful and this person was so beautiful, +and now everything has gone ugly." Again you are interpreting. The person remains +whatsoever he is, but your interpretations and projections go on, and you are never +allowing energy to assert itself. You go on suppressing it. You are suppressing inwardly +and outwardly also. You never allow the reality to assert itself. + +I am reminded that one day a neighbor asked Mulla Nasruddin whether he could have his +horse for a few hours. The Mulla said, "I would gladly give my horse to you, but my wife +has gone with the horse and they will be out for the whole day." + + +Just at this moment the neigh of the horse was heard from the stable, so the man looked at +Mulla Nasruddin. Nasruddin said, "Okay, whom do you believe — me or the horse? And + + + +the horse is a notorious liar to boot. Whom do you believe?" + +We create an untrue world around us because of our projections, but if the reality asserts +and the horse neighs from the stable, we ask, "Whom do you believe?" We always +believe ourselves, not the reality that goes on asserting. It is asserting every moment, but +we go on forcing our illusions. That is why every man feels disillusioned in the end. It is +not because of reality. Every man and woman feels disillusioned in the end, as if the +whole life has been a waste. But now you cannot do anything, you cannot undo it. Time +is no more with you. Time has flown and death is near and you are disillusioned, and now +the opportunity is lost. + +Why does everyone feel disillusioned? Not only those who are unsuccessful in life, but +those who are successful in life, they also feel the same. It is okay if unsuccessfuls feel +disillusioned, but even those who succeed feel this way. Napoleons and Hitlers and +Alexanders, they also feel disillusioned. The whole life has been a waste. Why? Is the +cause really in reality, or is the cause in the dreams which you were projecting? And then +you could not project them and the reality asserted itself, and ultimately reality wins and +you are defeated. + +You can win only if you are not projecting. + +So remember the second thing: look directly at things as they are. Don’t project, don't +interpret, don’t force your mind upon things. Allow the reality to assert itself, whatsoever +it is. This is always good, and howsoever beautiful your dreams they are bad, because +you are bound on a journey of disillusion. And the sooner you are disillusioned, the +better, but once one illusion is gone, immediately you start creating another to replace it. +Allow a gap. Between two illusions, allow a gap. Allow an interval so the reality can be +seen. This is very arduous — to look at the reality as it is. It may not be according to your +desires. There is no need for it to be according to your desires. But then you have to live +with reality, to live in it — and you ARE in it! It is better to come to tenns with reality +than to go on deceiving yourself, and you are not aware how you go on projecting. +Someone says something, and you understand something else. And you base things on +your understanding, and then you make a house of cards out of it, you create a palace of +cards. It was never said! Something else was meant! + +Always see what is there. Don’t be in a haste. It is better not to understand something +than to misunderstand. It is better to remain ignorant consciously than to think that you +know. Look into your relationships — at the husband, the wife, the friend, the teacher, the +master, the servant — look! Everyone is thinking in his own ways, interpreting the other, +and there is no meeting, no communication. + +Then they are fighting, in constant conflict. The conflict is not between two persons, the +conflict is between false images. Be alert so that you don’t have any false image of +anyone else. Remain with the real, howsoever hard, howsoever arduous and difficult, +even if sometimes it seems impossible. But once you know the beauty of remaining with +the real, you will never be a victim of dreaming. + +And thirdly, why do you dream? It is a substitute. Dreaming is a substitute. If you cannot +get whatsoever you desire in reality, then you start dreaming. For example, if you have +fasted the whole day, in the night. You will dream: you will dream about food, of being +invited by a great emperor, or some such thing. You will be eating and eating and eating +in your dreaming. The whole day you were fasting, and now in the night you are eating. + +If you are sexually suppressive, then your dreams will become sexual. Through your + + + +dreams it can be known what you are suppressing in the day. Your daytime fast will be +shown by your dream. Dreams are substitutes, and psychologists say that it will be +difficult for man as he is to live without dreams. And they are right in a way. As man is it +will be difficult to live without dreams, but if you want a transformation, then you have +to live without dreams. Why are dreams created? Because of desires. Unfulfilled desires +become dreams. + +Study your desiring; be aware and observe it. + +The more you observe it, the more it will disappear. And then you will not create webs in +the mind, and you will not move in a private world of your own. Dreams cannot be +shared; even two intimate friends cannot share their dreams. You cannot invite anyone +into your dreams. Why? You and your lover cannot both be in the same dream. Your +dream is yours; another's dream is another’s. They are private. Reality is not so private, +only madness is private. Reality is universal, you can share it; you cannot share dreams. +They are your private madness — fictions. So what is to be done? + +One can, in the day, live so totally that nothing is left suspended. If you are eating, eat +totally. Enjoy it so totally that you don’t need any dream in the night. If you are loving +someone, love so totally that no love enters into your dreams. Whatsoever you do in the +day, do it so totally that nothing is suspended on the mind, nothing is incomplete which +has to be completed in dreams. Try this, and within a few months you will have a +different quality of sleep. Dreams will go on becoming less and less, and deep sleep will +deepen. And when in the night dreams are less, in the day projections will be less +because, really, your sleep continues and your dream continues. With closed eyes in the +night and with opened eyes in the day, they continue. Inside a current goes on. + +Any moment, close your eyes and wait, and you will see that the film has come back; the +dream is running. + +It is always there, just waiting for you. It is just like the stars in the day. They have not +disappeared, but only because of the sunlight you cannot see them. They are there +waiting, and when the sun will set they will start appearing. + +Your dreams are just that way — moving within you even while you are awake. They are +just waiting. Close your eyes, and they start functioning. When dreams are less in the +night, in the day you will have a different quality of waking. If your night changes, your +day changes; if your sleep changes, your waking changes. You will be more alert. With +less dreams running within, you will be less asleep. You will look more directly. + +So don’t leave anything suspended, that is one thing. And whatsoever you are doing, +remain with the act. Don’t move anywhere else. If you are taking a shower, be there. +Forget the whole world. Now this shower is the whole universe. Everything has ceased; +the world has disappeared. There is only you and the shower. Remain there. Move with +each act so totally that you are neither lagging behind nor jumping ahead; you are with +the act. Then dreams will disappear, and with less dreaming you will be more able to +penetrate the reality. + +Now the technique. The technique is concerned with this. + +"AS A HEN MOTHERS HER CHICKS, MOTHER PARTICULAR KNOWINGS, +PARTICULAR DOINGS, IN REALITY.” + +The key tenn is "IN REALITY." + + + +You are also mothering many things, but in dreams — not in reality. You are also doing +many things, but in dream — not in reality. Don’t mother dreams, don't help dreaming to +grow more in you; don't give your energy to dreaming. Withdraw yourself from all +dreams. It will be difficult because you have invested so much in your dreaming. If you +suddenly withdraw yourself totally from dreaming, you will feel as if you are sinking and +dying, because you have always lived in a postponed dream. You have never been here +and now, you are always somewhere else. You have been hoping. + +Have you heard the Greek parable of Pandora's box? To revenge a certain deed on the +part of a man, Pandora was sent a box, and the box had all the diseases that are now +rampant in humanity. They were not there before, and when the box was opened the +diseases were released. Pandora, being afraid after seeing the diseases, closed the box. +Only one disease remained there and that was hope; otherwise man would have +dissipated, all these diseases would have killed him — but because of hope he continued. +Why are you living? Have you ever asked? There is nothing to live for here and now. +There is just hope. You are carrying a Pandora's box. Why are you living right now? Why +do you get up every morning? Why do you start the whole day again — again and again? +Why this repetition? What is the reason? You cannot find any reason right now for why +you are living, and if you find something it will be something in the future — a hope that +something is going to happen: someday "something" is going to happen. + +You don’t know when that day will come; you even don’t know what it is that is going to +happen — but someday "something is going to happen," and so you go on prolonging +yourself, you go on carrying yourself. + +Man lives just in hope, and this is not life because hope means dream. Unless you live +here and now, you are not alive. You are a dead weight, and that tomorrow which will +fulfill all your hopes is never to come. When death will come, then only will you realize +that now there is no tomorrow, and now you cannot postpone. Then you will feel +disillusioned, cheated — but no one has cheated you; you are the master of the whole +mess. + +Try to live in the moment, in the present, and don’t cherish hopes, whatsoever their +nature. They may be worldly, they may be other-worldly; it makes no difference. They +may be religious — somewhere in future, in the other world, in heaven, in the NIRVANA, +after death — but it makes no difference. Don't hope. Even if you feel a subtle +hopelessness here, remain here. Don't move from the moment here and now. Don’t move! +Suffer it, but don't allow the hope to enter in. + +Through hope dreaming enters. Be hopeless. If life is hopeless, be hopeless. Accept it, +but don't cling to any future event. Then suddenly there will be a change. Once you +remain in the present moment, dreams stop — because then they cannot arise. The source +has been withdrawn. + +You cooperate with them, you mother them; that is why they arise. Don’t cooperate with +them, don’t mother them. + +This sutra says "... MOTHER PARTICULAR KNOWINGS." Why particular knowings? +You also mother, but you mother particular theories, not knowings; particular scriptures, +not knowings; particular hypotheses, systems, philosophies, world views — but never +particular knowings. This sutra says throw them away. Scriptures, theories, they are of no +use. Have your own experience which is real, your own knowings, and mother them. +Howsoever trivial, a real knowing is something. You can base your life upon it. + + + +Whatsoever they are, always think of real, particular knowings that YOU have known. +Have you known anything? You know many things, but everything is borrowed. + +Someone has said them, someone has given them to you. Teachers, parents, society, they +have conditioned your mind. You "know" about God, you "know" about love, you +"know" about meditation. You don't know anything really! You have not tasted anything, +this all is borrowed. Someone else has tasted, the taste is not your own. Someone else has +seen, but you have your eyes and you have not used them. Someone else has experienced +— a Buddha has experienced, a Jesus has experienced — and you just go on borrowing +their knowings. They are false! For you, they are of no use. They are more dangerous +than ignorance, because ignorance is yours and the knowledge is borrowed. + + +It is better to be ignorant; at least the ignorance is yours. It is authentic, it is real, sincere +and honest! Don't go on with borrowed knowledge. Otherwise you will forget that you +are ignorant, and you will remain ignorant. + +This sutra says "... MOTHER PARTICULAR KNOWINGS." Always try to know +something in a way that is fresh, direct, immediate. Don't believe in anyone. Your belief +will lead you astray. Trust yourself — and if you cannot trust yourself, how can you trust +anybody else? + +Sariputta came to Buddha, and he said, "I have come to believe in you. I have come! + +Help me to build faith in you." + +Buddha is reported to have said, "If you don't believe in yourself, how can you believe in +me? So forget me. First have trust in yourself, believe in yourself. Only then can you +have trust in someone else." + +So remember this: you cannot trust anybody if you cannot even trust yourself. The first +trust is always within. Only then can it flow; only then can it overflow, it can reach to +others. But how can you trust if you don’t know anything? How can you trust in yourself +if you don’t have any experience? Try to trust in yourself. Don’t think that this experience +of looking through others' eyes is only with the absolute. It is with ordinary experiences +also. But let them be your own. They will help you to grow, they will make you mature, +they will make you ripened. + + +This is really strange: you look with others’ eyes, you live with others' lives. You call a +rose beautiful. Really, is it your feeling or just a teaching that is spread around you that a +rose is beautiful? Is this your knowing? Have you known it? You say that moonlight is +good, beautiful. Is it your knowing, or is it just that poets have been singing about it and +you are repeating it? If you are like a parrot, you cannot live your life authentically. +Whenever you assert anything and whenever you say anything, first check within +whether it is your knowledge and your experience. + +Throw out all that is not yours — it is of no use — and cherish and mother all that is yours, +because only through that will you grow. "MOTHER PARTICULAR KNOWINGS, +PARTICULAR DOINGS, IN REALITY." Always remember "in reality." Do something. +Have you done anything ever, or have you been just following others, just following +orders? "Love your wife": have you really loved her? Or are you just doing a duty +because it has been said, because it has been taught, "Love your wife — or love your +mother, love your father, love your brother," so you are loving and you are following! +Have YOU really loved any time when you were there? Was it ever the case that no + + + +teaching was working and no other was being followed? Were you ever authentically in +love? You can deceive yourself; you can say, "Yes!" But find out before you say +anything. + +If you have loved, you would be transfonned; the particular act of love would have +changed you. But it has not changed you because your love is false. And the whole life +has become false. You go on doing things that are not your own. Do your own thing and +mother it. + +Buddha is good, but you cannot follow him. Jesus is good, beautiful, but you cannot +follow him. And if you will follow, you will become ugly. You will be a carbon copy. +You will be false, and you will not be accepted by the existence. Nothing false is +accepted. Love a Buddha, love a Jesus, but don’t be their carbon copies. Don’t imitate. +Always allow your own self to move in its own way. You will become Buddha-like one +day, but the path will be basically your own. One day you will become a Jesus, but you +will have traveled along a different route, you will have experienced different things. One +thing is certain: whatsoever may be the route and whatsoever may be the experience, it +must be authentic, real, and your own. Then you will reach one day. Through falsity you +cannot reach the truth; falsity will lead to more falsity. + +Do something, remembering well that it is you who are doing it without following +anybody. Then even a very small act, just a smile, may become a source of SATORI, a +source of SAMADHI, cosmic consciousness. You come back to your home and smile at +your children. That smile is false; you are pretending. + +You are smiling because a smile is expected. It is a painted smile. Nothing else is smiling +in you but the lips. They are manipulated; the smile is mechanical. And you can become +so habituated in this that you may completely forget how to smile. You may laugh, but +the laughter may not be coming from your center. + +Always remember, no matter what you are doing, observe whether your center is +involved in it or not, because if it is not involved it is better not to do a thing. Don’t do it! +No one is forcing you to do anything. Don’t do it! Preserve your energy for the moment +when something real happens to you; then do it. Don’t smile, preserve the energy. The +smile will come, and then it will change you completely. Then it will be total. Then every +cell of your body will smile. Then it will be an explosion — nothing painted. + +And children know, you cannot deceive them. The moment you can deceive them, they +are no more children. They kn ow when your smile is false, they can detect it; anyone +who is real will detect it. Your tears are false, your smile is false. These are small acts, +but you are made up of small acts. So don't think to do something big — that then you will +do this. If you are false in small things you will always be false. + +It is easy to be false in big things. If you are false in small things, it is very easy to be +false in big things, because big things because big things are always on exhibition. + +They are for others to see, so you can very easily be false. You can be a saint if +saintliness is respected. Then you are on exhibition — just an exhibition piece. You can +be a saint because it is respected and ego-fulfdling, but everything will be false. Just +think, if a society changes its attitudes as they have been changed in Soviet Russia or in +China, immediately, saints disappear — because there is no respect for them. + +I remember one of my friends, a Buddhist BHIKKHU who went to Soviet Russia in +Stalin’s days. He told me that whenever somebody would shake hands with him, suddenly + + + +the man would shrink and would say, "You have the hands of a bourgeois." He had very +beautiful hands. As a BHIKKHU he had never done anything; he was a beggar, a royal +beggar, so there had been no labor. His hands were very smooth, beautiful, feminine. In +India, whenever someone touched his hands he would say, "So beautiful!" In Russia, +whenever someone would touch his hands, he would shrink away, and the condemnation +would come into his eyes and he would say, "So you have bourgeois hands, the hands of +an exploiter." He came back and told me, "I felt so condemned there that I longed to be a +laborer." + +Saints disappeared from Russia because now there is no respect. All that saintliness +which was there was only on exhibition; it was a showpiece, painted. Only real saints can +exist now in Russia. + +For unreal ones there is no possibility because you will have to struggle there to be a +saint, and the whole society will be against you. In India, the easiest way to survive and +exist is to be a saint. Everyone respects you. You can be false, and falsity pays. +Remember this: from the very morning, when you open your eyes, try to be real and +authentic. Don't do anything which is false. Only for seven days, go on remembering. +Don’t do anything which is false. Whatsoever is lost, let it be lost. Whatsoever you lose, +lose it. But remain real, and within seven days a new life will be felt within you. The +dead layers will be broken and a new living current will come to you. You will feel alive +again for the first time — a resurrection. + +"MOTHER DOINGS... MOTHER KNOWINGS.... IN REALITY" - not in dream. Do +whatsoever you like to do, but think — really, are you doing it, or is your mother doing it +through you or your father doing it through you? Because dead men, dead parents, +societies, old generations gone long ago are still functioning within you. They have +created such conditionings that you go on fulfilling THEM — and they were fulfilling +their dead fathers and mothers, and you are fulfilling your dead fathers and mothers, and +no one is fulfilled. How can you fulfill someone who is dead? But the dead are living +through you. + +Always observe when you do something, whether your father is doing it through you or +you are doing it. + +When you get angry, is it your anger or is it the way your father used to be angry? You +are just imitating. I have seen patterns going on, being repeated. If you marry, your +marriage is going to be just approximately the same as your father's and your mother's. +You will act like your father, your wife will act like her mother, and you will create the +same mess again. When you get angry, observe: are you there or someone else? When +you love, remember, are you there or someone else? When you speak something, +remember, are you speaking or your teacher? When you make a gesture, remember, is it +yours or is someone else present in your hand? It will be difficult, but this is SADHANA. +This is what spiritual effort means. + +And leave all falsities. You may feel a certain dullness for a time being, because all your +falsities will drop and the real will take time to come and assert itself. There will be a +period of a gap. Allow that period, and don't be afraid and don’t become scared. Sooner +or later your false selves will drop, masks will drop, and your real face will come into +being. Only through that real face can you encounter God. That is why this sutra says, +"AS A HEN MOTHERS HER CHICKS, MOTHER PARTICULAR KNOWINGS, +PARTICULARS DOINGS, IN REALITY." + + + +The second sutra: + +"SINCE, IN TRUTH, BONDAGE AND FREEDOM ARE RELATED, THESE WORDS +ARE ONLY FOR THOSE TERRIFIED WITH THE UNIVERSE. + + +THIS UNIVERSE IS A REFLECTION OF MINDS. AS YOU SEE MANY SUNS IN +THE WATER FROM ONE SUN, SO SEE BONDAGE AND LIBERATION." + +This is a very deep technique, one of the deepest, and only very rare minds have tried it. +Zen is based on this technique. This technique is saying a very difficult thing — difficult +to comprehend, not difficult to experience. But first comprehension is needed. + +This sutra says that the world and NIRVANA are not two things, they are one; that +heaven and hell are not two things, they are one; and that bondage and liberation are not +two things, they are one. It is difficult because we can only conceive of something easily +if it is in terms of polar opposites. + +We say that this world is bondage, so how to get out of this world and be liberated? Then +liberation is something which is opposite, which is not bondage. But this sutra says that +both are the same — liberation and bondage — and unless you are freed from both you are +not freed. Bondage binds, and liberation also. Bondage is a slavery, and liberation is also. +Try to understand this. Look at a person who is trying to go beyond bondage. What is he +doing? He leaves his home, he leaves his family, he leaves the riches, he leaves the things +of the world, he leaves society just to get out of bondage, out of the fetters of the world. +Then he creates new fetters for himself. Those fetters are negative. + + +I have seen one saint who cannot touch money. He is respected — he is bound to be +respected by those who are mad after money. He has moved to the other pole. If you put +money in his hand, he will throw it as if there were some poison or as if you have put +some scorpion in his hand. He will throw it and he will become scared. A subtle +trembling comes to his body. What is happening? He has been fighting with money. He +must have been a greedy man — too much greed. Only then can he move to this extreme. +He may have been too much obsessed with money. He is still obsessed, but now in the +reverse direction. However, the obsession is still there. + +I have seen one sannyasin who cannot look at any female face. He becomes afraid. He +will always look down, he will never look up if some woman is there. What is the +problem? He must have been too much sexual, obsessed with sex. He is still obsessed, +but then he was running after this woman or that and now he is running from women — +from this one and that. But he is still obsessed with women. Whether he is running after +or running from, his obsession remains. He thinks that now he is liberated from women, +but this is a new bondage. You cannot become liberated by reaction. The thing you go +against will bind you negatively; you cannot escape it. If someone is against the world +and for liberation, he cannot be liberated; he will remain in the world. + +The attitude of being against is a bondage. + +This sutra is very deep, it says "SINCE IN TRUTH, BONDAGE AND FREEDOM ARE +RELATED..." They are not opposite, they are relative. What is freedom? You say, "Not +bondage." And what is bondage? You say, "Not freedom." You can define them by each +other. They are just like hot and cold, not opposite. What is hot and what is cold? They +are just degrees of the same phenomenon — degrees of temperature — but the + + + +phenomenon is the same, and they are relative. If there is in one bucket cold water and in +another there is hot water and you put in both your hands — one hand in the hot and one +in the cold — what will you feel? A difference of degrees. + +And if at first you cool down both your hands on ice and then you put both your hands +into the hot and the cold water, what will happen? Now again you will feel a difference. +Your cold hand will now feel more hot in the hot water than it felt before. And if your +other hand has become cold, much colder than the cold water, then that water will now +look hot; you will not feel it as cool. It is relative. There are only degrees of difference, +but the phenomenon is the same. + +Tantra says that bondage and liberation, SANSARA and MOKSHA, are not two things, +but a relative phenomenon — of the same thing. So tantra is unique. Tantra says that you +have to be liberated not only from bondage; you have to be liberated from MOKSHA +also. + +Unless you are liberated from both, you are not Liberated. + +So the first thing: don't try to go against anything because you will move to something +which belongs to it. It looks opposite, but it is not. Don’t move from sex to +BRAHMACHARYA. If you are trying to move from sex to BRAHMACHARYA, your +BRAHMACHARYA will be nothing but sexuality. Don't move from greed to no-greed +because that no-greed will again be a subtle greed. That is why if a tradition teaches to be +non- greedy, it gives you some profit motive in it. + +I was staying with a saint, and he told his followers, "If you leave greed you will get +much in the other world. If you leave greed, you will gain much in the other world!" +Those who are greedy, greedy for the other world, will be influenced by this. They may +be motivated, and they will be ready to leave many things to gain. But the motive to gain +remains; otherwise how can a greedy man move toward non-greed? Some motive must +be there which fulfills his greed deeply. + +So don’t create opposite poles. All opposites are related; they are degrees of the same +phenomenon. If you become aware of this, you will say that both poles are the same. If +you can feel this, that both poles are the same, and if this feeling deepens, you will be +liberated from both. Then you are neither for SANSARA nor for MOKSHA. Really, then +you are not asking for anything; you have stopped asking. + +In that stopping, you are liberated. In that feeling that everything is the same, the future +will have dropped. Where can you move now? Sex and BRAHMACHARYA both are the +same, so where is one to move? And if greed and non-greed are the same and violence +and nonviolence are the same, where has one to move? + +There is nowhere to move. Then movement ceases; there is no future. You cannot desire +anything because all desires will be the same; the difference will be just of degrees. What +can you desire? Sometimes I ask people — when they come to me, I ask them — "What do +you really desire?" Their desire is based in them as they are. If they are greedy, they +desire nongreed; if they are sexual, obsessed with sex, they desire BRAHMACHARYA, +how to be beyond sex, because they are miserable in their sex. + +But this desire for BRAHMACHARYA is based, rooted, in their sexuality. They ask, +"How to get out of this world?" The world is too much on them, they are too much +burdened and they are clinging too much, because the world cannot burden you unless +you cling to it. The burden is in your head — not because of the burden, but because of +you, you are carrying it. And they are carrying the whole world; then they get burdened. + + + +And in this experience of misery there arises a new desire for the opposite, so then they +start hankering for the opposite. + +They were running after money, so now they run after meditation. + +They were running after something in this world; now they are running after something +in that world. But the running remains, and the running is the problem. The object is +irrelevant. Desire is the problem. What you desire is meaningless. You desire, that is the +problem, and you go on changing objects. Today you desire A, tomorrow you desire B, +and you think you are changing. Then the day after tomorrow you desire C, and you think +you are transformed. BUT you are the same. You desired A, you desired B, you desired +C, and A-B-C are not you. You desire — that is you, and that remains the same. You +desire bondage, then you get frustrated, fed up; then you desire liberation. You desire, +and desire is the bondage. + +So you cannot desire liberation. Desire is bondage, so you cannot desire liberation. When +desire ceases, liberation is. That is why this sutra says, "IN TRUTH, BONDAGE AND +FREEDOM ARE RELATIVE." So don't become obsessed with the opposite. + +"These words are only for those terrified with the universe." These words of bondage and +freedom are for those who are terrified with the universe. + +"THIS UNIVERSE IS THE REFLECTION OF MINDS." Whatsoever you see in this +universe is a reflection. If it looks like bondage, it means it is your reflection. If it looks +like liberation, again it is your reflection. + +"AS YOU SEE MANY SUNS IN WATER FROM ONE SUN, SO SEE BONDAGE +AND LIBERATION." + +The sun rises, and there are many ponds — dirty and pure, big and small, beautiful and +ugly — and one sun reflects in many ponds. One who goes on counting the reflections +will think that there are many, many suns. One who looks not into the reflections but to +the reality will see one. The world, as you look at it, reflects you. If you are sexual, the +whole world seems sexual. If you are a thief, the whole world seems to be in the same +profession. + +Once Mulla Nasruddin and his wife were fishing, and the place was restricted; only +license holders could fish there. Suddenly a policeman appeared, so Mulla's wife said, +"Mulla, you have the license so you run away. Meanwhile, I will escape." + +So Mulla started running. He ran and ran and ran, and the policeman followed. Of course, +Mulla left the wife there, and the policeman followed him. Mulla ran and ran until he felt +that now his heart would explode. But by that time the policeman caught hold of him. + +The policeman was also perspiring, and he said, "Where is your license?" So Mulla +produced his papers. The policeman looked at them and they were okay. So he said, + +"Why are you running, Nasruddin? Why did you run away?" + +Nasruddin said, "I am going to a doctor, and he says after every meal to run for half a +mile." + +The policeman said, "Okay, but you saw me running after you, chasing you, yelling, so +why didn’t you stop?" + +Nasruddin said, "I thought that maybe you go to the same doctor." + + +It is logical; it is what is happening. Whatsoever you see all around you is more a +reflection of you than of any real thing there. You look at yourself mirrored everywhere. + + + +The moment you change, the reflection changes. The moment you become totally silent, +the whole world becomes silent. The world is not a bondage: bondage is a reflection. And +the world is not liberation; liberation is again a reflection. + +A Buddha finds the whole world in NIRVANA. A Krishna finds the whole world +celebrating in ecstasy, in bliss; there is no misery. But tantra says that whatsoever you see +is a reflection unless all seeing disappears and only the mirror is seen with nothing +reflected in it. That is the truth. + +If something is seen, it is just a reflection. Truth is one; many can only be reflections. +Once this is understood — not theoretically, but existentially, through experience — you +are liberated, liberated from both bondage and liberation. + +Naropa, when he became enlightened, was asked by someone, "Have you achieved +liberation now?" + +Naropa said, "Yes and no both. Yes, I am not in bondage, and no because that liberation +was also a reflection of bondage. I thought about it because of bondage." + +Look at it in this way: you are ill then you long for health. That longing for health is part +of your illness. If you are really healthy, you will not long for health. + +How will you? If you are really healthy, where is the longing? What is the need? If you +are really healthy, you never feel that you are healthy. Only ill, diseased persons feel that +they are healthy. What is the need? How can you feel that you are healthy? If you are +bom healthy and you have never been ill, will you be able to feel your health? Health is +there, but it cannot be felt. It can be felt only through contrast, through the opposite. Only +through the opposite are things felt. If you are ill, you can feel health — and if you are +feeling health, remember, you are still ill. + +So Naropa says, "Yes and no both. 'Yes’ because there is no bondage now, but with the +bondage liberation has also disappeared; that is why 'No'. It was part of it. Now I am +beyond both — neither in bondage nor in liberation." + +Don't make religion a search, a desire. Don't make MOKSHA, Liberation, NIRVANA, an +object of desiring. It happens when there is no desiring. + + +THE END. + + + +Chapter 46: The tantric way to freedom from desires + + +The first question: + +Question 1 + +"YOU SAID YESTERDAY THAT THE MOTIVATION TOWARDS LIBERATION +OR SAMADHI IS ALSO A TENSION AND A BARRIER, BUT IS IT NOT CORRECT +THAT IT IS NOT A DESIRE BUT AN ASPIRATION - THE INTRINSIC THIRST OF +THE HUMAN BEING?" + +You must understand what desire means, and religions have confused you much about it. +If you desire something of the world, they call it desire. If you desire something of the +other world, they call it by a different name. This is absurd. Desire is desire! It makes no +difference what the object of desire is. The object may be anything — of this world, +material, or of another world, spiritual — but desiring remains the same. + +Every desire is a bondage. Even if you desire God, it is a bondage; even if you desire +liberation it is a bondage. And liberation cannot happen unless this desiring goes away +totally. So remember, you cannot desire liberation, that is impossible; that is +contradictory. You can become desireless, and then liberation happens. But that is not a +result of your desire. Rather, it is a consequence of no-desire. + +So try to understand what desire is. Desire means that right now you are not okay, you +are not at ease. This very moment you are not at ease with yourself, and something else in +the future, if fulfilled, will bring you peace. The fulfillment is always in the future; it is +never here and now. + +This tension of the mind for the future is desire. Desire means you are not in the present +moment, and all that is there is only the present moment. Y ou are somewhere in the +future, and the future is not. It never has been, it will never be. All that is, is always the +present — this moment. + +This projection of your fulfillment somewhere in the future is desire. So what that future +fulfillment is, is irrelevant. It may be the kingdom of God, heaven, NIRVANA, it may be +anything, but if it is in the future, it is desire. And you cannot desire in the present, +remember; that is not possible. In the present you can only be, you cannot desire. How +can you desire in the present? + +Desire leads into the future, into fantasy, dreaming. That is why so much insistence by +Buddha for no-desire — because only in no-desire do you move into reality. With desire +you move into dreams. The future is a dream, and when you project into the future you +are going to be frustrated. You are destroying reality right now for future dreams, and +this habit of the mind will remain with you. It is being strengthened every day. So when +your future comes it will come in the form of the present, and your mind will again move +to some other future. Even if you could reach God, you will not be satisfied. The way you +are, it is impossible. Even in the presence of the divine, you will have moved away into +the future. + + +Your mind is always moving into the future. This movement of the mind in the future is +desire. Desire is not concerned with any object, with whether you desire sex or you desire +meditation — it makes no difference. Desiring is the thing — that you desire. It means you +are not here. It means you are not in the real moment, and the present moment is the only + + + +door into existence. The past and future are not doors, they are walls. + +So I cannot call any desire spiritual. Desire as such is worldly. Desire is the world. There +is no spiritual desire; there cannot be. That is a trick of the mind, a deception. You don't +want to leave desiring, so you change the objects. First you were desiring wealth, +prestige, power. Now you say you don’t desire and that these are worldly things. You +condemn them, and those who desire them are condemned in your eyes. Now you desire +God, the kingdom of God, NIRVANA, MOKSHA, the eternal, SATCHITANANDA, the +brahman. Now you desire these, and you feel very good. You think you are transfonned, +but you have not done anything. You remain the same. + +You are just playing tricks with yourself, and now you are in a greater mess because you +think that this is not desiring. You remain the same. The mind remains the same; the +functioning of the mind remains the same. You are not yet here. The objects of desire +have changed, but the running, the dreaming, remains, and the dreaming is the desire — +not the object. + + +So try to understand me. I say that every desire is worldly because desire is the world. So +it is not a question of changing the desire, it is not a question of changing objects. It is a +question of a mutation, of a revolution from desire to no-desire; from desire to no-desire, +not from old desires to new desires, from worldly desire to otherworldly desires, from +material desires to spiritual desires — no! From desire to no-desire is the revolution! + +But how to move from desire to no-desire? You can move only if there is some desire. If +some profit motive, some greed, some gain is there, only then can you move from desire +to no-desire. But then you are not moving at all. I say that with no-desire you will attain +eternal bliss. This is right — that with no-desire eternal bliss happens — but if I say to you +that with no-desire you will gain eternal happiness, you will make it an object of the +desire and then you will have missed the point completely. + +It is not a result, it is a consequence of deep understanding. So try to understand that with +desire there is misery, and don't think that you know it already. You don't know; +otherwise how can you move into desire? You have not yet become aware that desire is +misery, desire is hell. Be aware When you desire something be aware. Then move with +the desire in full alertness, and then you will reach hell. + +Every desire leads to misery, whether fulfilled or not. + +If fulfilled, it leads sooner; unfulfilled it takes time — but every desire leads to misery. Be +alert of the whole process, and move with it. There is no hurry because nothing can be +done in a hurry, and spiritual growth is not possible in a hurry. Move slowly, patiently. +Watch every desire and then watch how every desire becomes a door to hell. If you are +watchful, sooner or later you will realize that desiring is hell. The moment that realization +happens, there will be no desire. Suddenly desires will disappear, and you will be in a +state of no-desire. I don’t say desirelessness, I simply say "no-desire." + +You cannot practice it, remember; only desires can be practiced. How can you practice +no-desire? You cannot practice it, you can only practice desires. But if you are alert, you +will become aware that they lead to misery. And when each desire leads to misery, when +this becomes a realization to you — not mere opinion and knowledge, but a realized fact +— desiring disappears, it becomes impossible. How can you lead yourself into misery? +You are always "leading yourself to happiness" — thinking that you are — and always +moving into misery. This has been happening for lives and lives. You always think this or + + + +that is the door of heaven, and when you have entered you always realize that this is hell. +And this has been without any exception; it is always the case. + +Move with mindfulness in every desire, and allow every desire to lead you to misery. + +Then, suddenly, one day the maturity will happen to you, this ripeness will happen to +you: you will realize that every desire is misery. + +The moment you realize it, desiring disappears. There is no need to do anything now; +desiring simply falls away, withers away, and you are in a state of no-desire. In that no- +desire NIRVANA is, the perfect, the absolute bliss is. You may call it God, the kingdom +of God or whatsoever you choose to call it, but remember well that it is not a result of +your desiring. It is a consequence of non-desiring, and non-desiring cannot be practiced. +Those who "practice" non-desiring, they are deluding themselves. There are many all +over the world — BHIKKHUS, sannyasins — who are practicing non-desiring. You +cannot practice non-desiring; no negative thing can be practiced. Underneath they are +desiring, they are hankering after God, the peace that will happen, the bliss that is waiting +for them somewhere in the future beyond death. They are desiring, and they call only +their desiring "spiritual desire." + +You can deceive yourself very easily. Words are very deceptive and you can rationalize. +You call a poison "ambrosia," and when you call it ambrosia it appears as ambrosia. +Words hypnotize; that is one thing. But this feeling, this realization that desire is misery, +must be yours. + +Mary Stevens has written somewhere that she was visiting a friend's home, and her +friend's daughter was blind. + +Mary Stevens was very puzzled because the girl would say, "He is ugly, I don't like him"; +and "The color of this dress is beautiful." + +As she was blind, Mary Stevens asked, "How do you feel that someone is ugly and that a +color is beautiful?" + +The girl said, "My sisters say this to me." This is knowledge. + +Buddha has said that desire is misery and you go on repeating. This is knowledge. You +are desiring, and you have never seen that desire is misery. You have simply heard +Buddha. This will not do. You are simply wasting your life and opportunity. Your own +experience can change you; nothing else changes. Knowledge cannot be borrowed. If +borrowed, it is just a fake. It looks like knowledge, but it is not. But why do we follow a +Buddha or a Jesus — why? Because of our greed. We look at Buddha’s eyes, and they are +so peaceful that greed arises, desire arises for how to attain this. Buddha is so blissful — +every moment in ecstasy. A desire arises for how to be Buddhalike. We also desire such +states. + +Then we go on asking how Buddha achieved this, how it happens. The "how" creates +many problems because then Buddha will say that in "no-desire" it happens. And he is +right, it HAS happened in no-desire. But when we hear that in no-desire it happens, we +start practicing no-desire, we start leaving desires, and the whole effort is a desire to be +Buddha-like. + + +Buddha was not trying to be like someone else; he was not asking to be a buddha. He was +simply trying to understand his own misery — and the more understanding dawned upon +him, the more misery disappeared. Then one day he came to understand that desire is + + + +poison. If you have desire you have fallen a victim; now there is no possibility of your +ever being happy. You can only hope — have hope and frustration, then more hope and +more frustration: this will be your circle. And when you become more frustrated you +hope more, because that is the only consolation. You go on moving in the future because +in the present you always have frustration, and the frustration is coming because of your +past. + +In the past this present was the future, and you hoped for it. Now it is a frustration. Then +you hope again for the future, and when it will become the present you will again become +frustrated. Then you will hope again. Then more frustration, more hope, and with more +hope, still more frustration. This is a vicious circle. This is what the wheel of SANSARA +is. + +But no buddha can give you his own eyes. And it is good that be cannot give them to +you; otherwise you will remain a fake always, eternally. Then you will never become +authentic. It is good to suffer because only through suffering will you become authentic +and real. So the first thing: move with your desires so that you can understand what they +really are. + +Experience whatever suffering is hidden there. Let it be revealed to you. Only that is +austerity — only that is TAPASCHARYA. + +Naropa has said that if you can be alert every desire leads you to NIRVANA, and this is +the meaning, because if you are alert, you know that every desire is misery. And when +you have searched every nook and corner of desiring, suddenly you stop. In that stopping +is the happening, and it is always there. That happening is always waiting for you, just +waiting to meet you in the present. But you are never in the present, you are always +dreaming. Reality sustains you. Because of the real you are alive; because of the real you +exist. But you go on moving in the unreal. The unreal is very hypnotizing. + +I have heard one Jewish joke. Two old friends met after many, many years. Then one +friend said to the other, "I have not seen you in twenty-five years. How is your son, your +boy Harry?" + +The other said, "There is a son; he is a great poet. All over the land his voice is heard, his +songs are sung, and those who know poetry say that sooner or later he is going to become +a Nobel laureate." + +The other friend said, "Marvelous! And tell me about your second son, Benny. How is +he?" + +The friend said, "I am so happy about my second son. He is a leader, a great political +leader. Thousands and thousands follow him, and I am sure that sooner or later he is +going to be the prime minister of this land." + + +Then the friend said, "My! So fortunate you are! And what about your third son Izzie?" +The father became very sad and said, "Izzie? He is still Izzie. He is a tailor. But I tell you +that if it was not for Izzie we would all be starving." + +But the father was sad because Izzie is just a tailor. And the poet and the great politician, +the great leader — they are dreams. Izzie is the reality — the tailor. "But if not for Izzie, +we would all be starving," he said. + +You could not exist were it not for this moment. THAT is real. But you are never happy +about it. You are happy in your dreams for the future about Nobel laureates, prime +ministers. Right now, "Izzie is just a tailor." Your reality is where you are grounded; your + + + +dreams are not your ground. They are false. Come to tenns with your reality in the +present moment. Encounter it, face it whatsoever it is, and don’t allow the mind to move +into the future. The future is desire. If you can be here and now, you are a buddha. If you +cannot be here and now, then everything is just dream stuff. + +And you will have to come back because dreams cannot lead you anywhere. They can +only lead you to hope and frustration, but nothing real happens through them. But +remember my point that you cannot imitate. You will have to pass through suffering. +Suffering is the path. It purifies you, it makes you alert, it makes you aware. + +The more you are aware, the less you are desire-filled. If you are perfectly aware, no- +desire happens, and meditation means nothing else but perfect awareness. + +The second question: + +Question 2 + +"PLEASE EXPLAIN HOW IT IS POSSIBLE THAT ONE CAN BE SPIRITUALLY +TRANSFORMED BY BEING TOTAL IN ACTIONS THAT ARE OF ANGER, +HATRED AND VIOLENCE." + +Yes, you can be totally transformed through anger, through hatred, through violence. And +there is no other way — because you exist in violence, in anger, in greed, in passion. + +From where you exist, ONLY from there, does the way start. I will not tell you to create +non-greed against your greed; I will tell you to be greedy totally, but with a fully alert +mind — to be violent, to be angry, but be total so that you suffer totally, so that you can +feel the whole poison of it. You must pass through this fire. No one else can pass for you; +no proxy is possible. You will have to pass through it, and you always think that someone +else will do it. + +Christians go on thinking that through Jesus there is salvation. It has not happened yet. +The world remains the same. Two thousand years have passed since Jesus was crucified, +but we go on hoping that someone else will suffer and we will reach to bliss. No! +Everyone has to carry his own cross. Jesus was crucified; he reached the goal. You +cannot reach. + +You will have to pass through that crucifixion yourself. And this is the crucifixion — that +anger is there, passion is there, violence is there, greed is there, jealousy is there. + +What are you doing with them? The society teaches to create the anti pole. Greed is there, +so suppress it and create a non-greedy mind. Anger is there, so suppress it. Don't be +angry. Push the energy back and smile. What happens? Anger goes on being accumulated +within, and you go on becoming more and more angry, because more and more energy is +accumulated within as anger — suppressed. It becomes your unconscious reservoir, and +against this anger you go on smiling. That smile becomes false, because while anger is +knocking within how can you smile? You can smile, but then it will be just a false thing. +So you are divided into two — a false smile and a real anger. The false smile becomes +your personality and the real anger remains your soul. You are divided against yourself, +and a constant fight will be there. And you cannot be happy with the false smile. No one +else is deceived. You cannot be happy with a real anger hidden behind always trying to +come out. A false smile and a real anger — this is the situation. All that is good is false +and all that is bad is real. The real you carry within and the false you show outside. This +is schizophrenic, and every man has become schizophrenic, divided — not only divided, + + + +but constantly fighting with himself. + + +The whole life and energy is wasted and dissipated in this fight. And the fight is stupid, +but this is happening. + +What I am suggesting is, don’t create any falsity around you. The false will never lead +you to the real; the false will lead you to more that is false. Don't do the false, and allow +the real total expression. When I say this you may become scared, because violence is +there and you may want to kill someone. So do I mean to go and kill? No! Meditate on it. +Close your room and allow your violence. You can express it on a pillow, on a picture, +on anything. There is no need to go and kill someone, because that is not going to help. +That will create more problems and a chain. + +On the pillow, write the name of your enemy or your friend — and remember, we are +more angry at our friends than at our enemies. Just put a picture of your wife or husband +on a pillow, and bring your violence out. Beat the pillow, kill the pillow, and do +whatsoever you feel. And don't feel that you are doing a stupid thing. This is what you +want to do with the real object, and that will be more stupid. Don't think that this is silly. +This is how you are: you are silly, and you cannot change by just repressing it. Look at +this silliness: see that this is how you are. Allow yourself full expression; act it out. And +if you can be real, you will realize for the first time what anger, what violence is hidden +within you. + +You are a volcano, and this can erupt from you at any moment. + +In any situation, the volcano may erupt. It is erupting every day. Someone kills someone, +and just a day before he was as normal as you. No one ever suspected that he was going +to be a murderer. No one suspects about you, and you have so many thoughts in your +mind to murder. You have thought, you have planned it many times. The idea to murder +someone else or yourself has come to you. It has happened to you if you are not +absolutely idiotic. Psychologists say that an intelligent man is bound to think of suicide at +least ten times in his life — at least ten times! — and ten thousand times you think to +murder someone. You never do it, that is another thing. But you can do it; the possibility +is always there. + +Make your anger a total act in meditation, and then see what happens. You will feel it +coming from your whole body. If you allow it, then every cell of your body will be in it. +Every pore, every fiber of the body will become violent. Your whole body will be in a +mad situation. It will go mad, but allow it, and don't withhold. Move with the river, and +after the cyclone is over, you will feel for the first time a deep center within you. A subtle +calmness will happen. When the anger has gone, there will be no repentance because you +have not done it to anyone. There will be no guilt. You will be unburdened. + +When this anger is thrown out and silence comes, that silence is real — not forced. + +You can sit down like a buddha in PADMASANA, in a yogic posture. You can force +yourself, but the monkey within you goes on jumping. Now only the body is static. The +mind is more mad than it ever was before. Whenever you sit for meditation, you feel +what is happening. You are never so noisy within when you are not meditating, so why +does so much noise happen whenever you meditate? Why does the mind go so vagrant? +Why do so many thoughts come in a cloud? It is because your body is static, and through +this staticness of your body you can feel the monkeyness of the mind more. The contrast +is there. + + + +But forced silence is of no use. Either you will not succeed in it or if you will succeed +you will move into sleep. A forced silence, if successful, becomes sleep. It is good as far +as sleep is concerned; otherwise it is useless. A real silence always happens only when +some pent-up energy is released totally. The disturbance was because of that pent-up +energy. That forced energy was trying to erupt, that was the problem, that was the +disturbance within. When it is released, you are unburdened. + +Then every fiber in your being is relaxed. In that relaxedness you can say that you are in +a state of no-anger. It is not against anger; it is simply absence of anger. Remember, the +real is always the absence, not the opposite — NOT the opposite! It is always the absence +— an absence of greed, an absence of sex, an absence of jealousy — but in that absence, +your reality flowers because the diseases have gone. + +Now your inner health can flower. And once it starts flowering you will not accumulate +anger. You accumulate anger only because you are missing yourself. + +Really, you are not angry at anyone else, you are angry within yourself. But you go on +projecting that anger onto others; otherwise you will go mad, so you go on finding +excuses. Really, you are angry because you are missing yourself, you are missing your +destiny. That which is possible for you is not happening, and that is why you are angry. +Nothing is happening to you, and time goes on flowing. Death is coming nearer, and you +remain as unfulfilled as ever, and there seems to be no possibility to be fulfilled. Because +of this, because you are not realizing your potentialities, because you have not become +that which you can become, you are angry, violent. And then you go on finding excuses. +You throw your anger on this, on that. Really, it is not a question of anger, and if you +make it a question of anger, your diagnosis is wrong. It is a question of self-realization. +Why is one violent? Why is one destructive? Because he is angry against himself, against +his very being — because he is. And then he feels to be against the whole world. + +A buddha is silent, non-violent, not because he has practiced it, but because now he has +realized himself. Now the flower has come to its total flowering, so nothing is there to +release. + +He is fulfilled. Simple gratefulness to the existence remains. Now there is no complaint; +nothing is wrong. When you really flower, everything is okay; all is good. Because of +this Buddha couldn’t see problems. All is good! That is why Buddha is not a +revolutionary. To be a revolutionary, you must be able to see misery, you must be able to +feel the whole mess around, the hell. To be a revolutionary, you must have a feeling that +everything is wrong. Only then are you a revolutionary. Buddha was here in this land, +Mahavira was here in this land, but they were not revolutionaries. Why? This question +arises: why? + +When one is at ease with oneself, all is good. He cannot be destructive, he can only be +creative. His revolution can only be a creative one, and you cannot see anything creative. +When someone destroys something, only then does it become news; only then can you +see it. + +A Lenin is seen as a revolutionary, not as a buddha. All over the world now there are +revolutionaries, and they go on growing. And the reason? It is because fewer and fewer +persons are realizing their potentiality. They are violent and they want to destroy — +because if there is no meaning in their lives how can they feel that there can be meaning +in others' lives? A Mahavira is even aware not to kill an insect, not even to kill a +mosquito, because he has realized himself. Now he kn ows what is possible even for a + + + +mosquito. + + +A mosquito is not just a mosquito; this is a possibility. An infinite possibility is there: this +mosquito can become divine. He cannot destroy it, it is impossible. He can only help. He +is only concerned with how to help so that the potential becomes the actual. + +You are just seeds. A great destiny is hidden, but nothing is being realized. The potential +is wasted; the seed remains the seed. You feel anger. The modern generation is much +angrier than older generations because there is more awareness of the possibility and less +fulfillment. Now the new generation knows what is possible much more than the older +generation. This generation is alive to the fact that much is possible. But nothing is +happening and nothing is becoming actual, so there is more frustration. If you cannot be +creative, at least you can be destructive; you feel your power in being destructive. Anger, +violence, are destructive forces. They are there because creativity is not there. + +Don't go against them. Rather, help them to be released. Don't suppress them; allow them +to evaporate from you. Then that which you think is opposite is absent. When they have +evaporated, you will suddenly realize that silence is there, that love is there, compassion +is there. They are not to be cultivated. They are just like a stream hidden in rocks. You +remove the rocks and the stream starts flowing. The stream is not against the rocks, not +the opposite of the rocks. + +Just the absence of the rocks, and an opening happens and the stream starts flowing. + +Love is in you like a stream, anger is in you like a rock. Remove it. But you go on forcing +it inside, more inside. Then you are forcing the stream as well to go more inside. Throw +this rock. There is no need to hit someone with it. Y ou want to hit someone because you +don't know how to throw it without hitting anyone. That is what I am teaching: to throw it +without hitting anyone. There is no need to hit anyone. And if you can throw this rock +without hitting anyone, everyone will profit out of it. You may not be throwing it on +others' heads, but it was always there and others feel it. + +When you are angry, howsoever you suppress it your anger is felt. Y ou vibrate it; around +you a subtle sadness happens. Everyone becomes alert that some disease has entered. +Everyone wants to leave you; you become repulsive. Your very attitude gives a bad odor +to you. + +You may not be aware, but biochemists say that when someone is in love or in anger or +in sex, different odors are released from the body — actually, not metaphorically. When +you are in anger, a bad odor is released from your body. When you are in love, the +quality is different. In sexual passion, a different odor is released. + +Animals are attracted by odor — because when the female is ready, a subtle odor is +released from her sex glands and the male is attracted. + +Without that odor the female is not ready. That is why you see dogs smelling: they can +smell sex. If you are sexual, you are also releasing a subtle odor. If you are angry, then +too — because different chemicals are released in the blood system. Consciously no one +may notice, but unconsciously everyone notices it. You are a burden — repulsive, +destructive. Throw this poison out of your system. + +So remember this: it is good to release in the vacuum. And the sky is big enough, it will +not return it back to you. It will simply absorb it, and you will be released. So do +anything meditatively and totally, even anger, even violence, even sex. It is easy to +conceive of how to be angry alone, but you can also create a sexual orgy alone + + + +meditatively. And you will have a different quality after that. + +While all alone, just close your room and move as if in the sex act. Allow your whole +body to move. Jump and scream; do whatsoever you feel like doing. Do it totally. Forget +everything — societal inhibitions, etcetera. Move in the sex act alone meditatively, but +bring your total sexuality to it. + +With the other, the society is always present because the other is present. And it is so +difficult to be in such a deep love that you can feel as if the other is not present. Only in a +very deep love, in a very deep intimacy, is it possible to be with your lover or beloved as +if he is not or she is not. + + +This is what intimacy means: if you are as if alone with your lover or beloved or your +spouse in the room with no fear of the other, then you can move in the sex act totally; +otherwise the other is always an inhibiting presence. The other is looking at you: "What +will she think? What will be think? What are you doing? Behaving like an animal?" + +One lady was here just a few days before. She came to complain against her husband. + +She said, "I cannot tolerate it. Whenever he loves me, he starts behaving like an animal." +When the other is present, the other is looking at you: "What are you doing?" And you +have been taught that there are some things which you can do and some things which you +are not to do. It inhibits; you cannot move totally. + +If love is really there, then you can move as if you are alone. And when two bodies +become one, they have a single rhythm. Then the two-ness is lost, and sex can be released +totally. And it is not like in anger; anger is always ugly, but sex is not always ugly. +Sometimes it is the most beautiful thing possible — but only sometimes. When the +meeting is perfect, when the two become one rhythm, when their breaths have become +one and their PRANA, energy, flows in a circle, when the two have disappeared +completely and the two bodies have become one whole, when the negative and positive, +the male and female, are no more there, then sex is the most beautiful thing possible. + +But that is not always the case. + +If it is not possible, you can bring your sex act to a climax of frenzy and madness while +alone, in a meditative mood. Close the room, meditate in it, and allow your body to move +as if you are not controlling it. Lose all control! + +Spouses can be very helpful, and particularly in tantra: your wife, your husband or your +friend can be very helpful if you both are experimenting deeply. Then allow each total +uncontrol. Forget civilization as if it never existed; move back into the Garden of Eden. +Throw that apple — the fruit of the tree of knowledge. Be Adam and Eve in the Garden of +Eden before they were expelled. Move back! Just be like innocent animals, and act out +your sexuality in its totality. You will never be the same again. + +Two things will happen. Sexuality will disappear. Sex may remain, but sexuality will +disappear completely. And when there is no sexuality, sex is divine. When the cerebral +hankering is not there, when you are not thinking about it, when it has become a simple +involvement — a total act, a movement of your whole being, not only of the mind — it is +divine. Sexuality will disappear first, and then sex may also disappear, because once you +know the deeper core of it, you can achieve that core without sex. + +But you have not known that deeper core, so how can you achieve it? The first glimpse +comes through total sex. + + + +Once known, the path can be traveled in other ways also. Just looking at a flower, you +can be in the same ecstasy in which you are when you meet with your spouse in a climax. +Just watching the stars, you can move in it. + +Once you know the path, you know it is within you. The spouse only helps you to know +it, and you help your spouse to know it. It is within you! The other was just a +provocation. The other was just a challenge to help you know something which was +always within you. + +And this is what is happening between a master and a disciple. The master can become +only a challenge to you to show that which has always been hidden in you. The master is +not giving you anything. He CANNOT give; there is nothing to give. And all that can be +given is worthless because it will only be a thing. + +That which cannot be given but which can only be provoked is worthwhile. A master is +just provoking you. He challenges you to help you to come to a point where you can +realize something which is already there. Once you know it, there is no need of a master. +Sex may disappear, but first sexuality disappears. Then sex becomes a pure, innocent act; +then sex also disappears. Then there is BRAHMACHARYA, celibacy. It is not opposite +to sex; it is just its absence. And remember this difference. This is not in your awareness. +Old religions go on condemning anger and sex as if both are the same or as if both belong +to the same category. + +They do not! Anger is destructive; sex is creative. All old religions go on condemning +them in a similar way, as if anger and sex, greed and sex, jealousy and sex are similar. +They are not! Jealousy is destructive — ALWAYS! It is never creative; nothing can come +out of it. Anger is always destructive, but not so with sex! Sex is the source of creativity. +The divine has used it for creation. Sexuality is just like jealousy, anger and greed: it is +always destructive. Sex is not — but we don't know pure sex, we know only sexuality. + +A person who is looking at a pornographic picture or one who is going to see a film, a +movie of sexual orgies, is not seeking sex; he is seeking sexuality. There are persons I +know who cannot make love to their wives unless they first go through some dirty +magazines or books or pictures. When they see these pictures, then they are excited. The +real wife is nothing to them. A picture, a nude picture, is more exciting to them. That +excitement is not in the gut; that excitement is in the mind, in the head. + +Sex transferred to the head is sexuality; thinking about it is sexuality. Living it is a +different thing, and if you can live it you can go beyond it. Anything lived totally leads +you beyond. So don’t be afraid of anything. LIVE IT! If you think it is destructive to +others, move in it alone, do not do it with others. If you think it is creative, then find a +partner, find a friend. + +Become a couple, a tantric couple, and move in it totally. If you still feel that the other's +presence is inhibiting, then you can do it alone. + +The last question: + +Question 3 + +"DOES AN ENLIGHTENED PERSON EVER DREAM? CAN YOU TELL US +SOMETHING ABOUT THE QUALITY AND NATURE OF AN ENLIGHTENED +PERSON’S SLEEP?” + + +No, an enlightened person cannot dream. And if you like dreams very much, never + + + +become enlightened. Beware! Dreaming is part of sleep. The first thing is that for +dreaming to happen you have to move into sleep. For ordinary dreams you have to move +into sleep. In sleep you become unconscious. When you are unconscious, dreams can +happen. They happen only in your unconsciousness. + +An enlightened person is conscious even while asleep. He cannot become unconscious. +Even if you give him an anaesthetic — chloroform or something like that — only his +periphery goes to sleep. He remains conscious; his consciousness cannot be disturbed. +Krishna says in the Gita that while everyone is asleep the yogi is awake. It is not that +yogis are not going to sleep in the night; they also sleep, but their sleep has a different +quality. Only their bodies sleep, and then their sleep is beautiful. It is a rest. + +Your sleep is not a rest. It may even be an exertion, and in the morning you may feel +more exhausted than you ever felt in the evening. + +A whole night's sleep, and in the morning you feel more exhausted — what is happening? +You are a miracle! + +The whole night was an inner tunnoil. Your body was not at rest because the mind was +so active. And the activity of the mind is bound to be an exertion for the body, because +without the body the mind cannot act. The activity of the mind means parallel activity of +the body, so the whole night your body is moving and is active. That is why in the +morning you feel more exhausted. + +What does it mean for someone to become enlightened? It means one thing: now he is +perfectly conscious. Whatsoever goes on in his mind, he is aware. And the moment you +are aware, certain things completely stop. Just through awareness they stop. It is just like +this room is dark and you bring a candle: the darkness will disappear. Everything will not +disappear. These bookcases will be here, and if we are sitting here we will be here. By +bringing the candle only darkness disappears. + +When someone becomes enlightened, now he has an inner light. That inner light is +awareness. Through that awareness sleep disappears — nothing else. But because sleep +disappears, the quality of everything changes. Now whatsoever he is going to do will be +in his perfect alertness, and that which needs unconsciousness as a prerequisite now +becomes impossible. + +He cannot be angry — not because it is a decision not to be angry; he CANNOT be angry. + +Anger can exist only when you are unconscious. Now unconsciousness is not there, so +the base is not there and anger is not possible. He cannot hate: hate exists only when you +are unconscious. He becomes love — not because of any decision on his part. When light +is there, when consciousness is there, love flows; it is natural. Dreaming becomes +impossible because dream needs, first of all, unconsciousness, and he is not unconscious. +Buddha's disciple, Ananda, said to him, after sleeping and living in the same room, in the +same place with Buddha, "This is a miracle; this is very strange. You never move in your +sleep." Buddha always remained in one posture the whole night. The way he would sleep +in the beginning, that would be the way he would come out of it, and his hand would +remain in the exact place where it was put. + +You might have seen Buddha's picture showing him sleeping. His posture is called "the +lying posture." He would remain in this same posture the whole night. Ananda watched +him for years. Whenever he would look at Buddha sleeping, he would be the same the +whole night. So Ananda asked, "Teh me, what are you doing the whole night? You +remain in one posture." + + + +Buddha is reported to have said, "Only once did I move in my sleep, but then I was not a +buddha. Just before, just a few days before the enlightenment happened, I moved in my +sleep. But then suddenly I became aware and I wondered, ’Why am I moving?' I moved +unconsciously without any knowing on my part. + +But after enlightenment there is no need. If I want I can move, but there is no need. And +the body is so relaxed..." + +Consciousness penetrates even in sleep. But you can have a fixed posture the whole night +and you will not be enlightened. You can practice it; it is not difficult. You can force +yourself; then within a few days you will be able to do this. But that is not the point. If +you look at a Jesus moving, do not think, "Why is he moving?" It depends. If Jesus +moves in his sleep, he is conscious. If he wants to move, he moves. + +For me, it happens quite the reverse. Before coming to awareness I slept always in one +posture the whole night. I do not remember ever moving. But since then I have been +moving the whole night. Even five minutes are enough for me in one posture. I have to +move again and again. I am so aware that it is not a sleep at all really. So it depends. But +you can never deduce anything from the outside. Always, this is only possible from the +inside. + +For an enlightened one, awareness will remain there even in his sleep, and then dreams +are not possible. They require unconsciousness — that is one thing — and they require +suspended experiences: that is the second thing. And for an enlightened one there is no +suspended experience — no incomplete experience. Everything is complete. He has eaten +his food; now he is not thinking about eating again. + +When he feels hungry he will eat again, but meanwhile there is no thought of eating. + +He has taken his bath; now he is not thinking of the bath tomorrow. When the time +comes, if he is alive, he will take it. If the situation permits it will happen, but there is no +thinking. Acts are there, but not any thinking about them. + +What are you doing? You are constantly rehearsing — constantly rehearsing for tomorrow +as if you are an actor and you are to show someone. Why are you rehearsing? When the +time comes, you will be there. + +The enlightened person lives in the moment, in the act, and he lives so totally that it is not +incomplete. If something is incomplete, then it will be completed in a dream. Dream is a +completion. It happens because the mind cannot allow anything to be incomplete. If +something is incomplete, there is an inner uneasiness. It wonders how to complete it. + +Then in a dream you complete it, and you are at ease. Even if it is completed in a dream, +for the mind it is a relaxation. + +What are you dreaming? You are just completing your incomplete acts which you could +not complete in the day. In the day you may have wanted to kiss a woman, and you could +not kiss. Now you will kiss her in your dream, and your mind will feel relaxed; a tension +is released. + +Your dreaming is nothing but your incompleteness, and an enlightened person is +complete. + +Whatsoever he is doing, he is doing it so wholly, so totally, that nothing remains +suspended. There is no need for any dreaming. Dreaming in the night will cease and +thinking in the day will cease. + +It is not that he will become unable to think. He can think if he needs. If you ask him a + + + +question he will think immediately, but no rehearsal is needed. First you think and then +you reply, but his reply is his thinking. He thinks and replies. That is also not good to say, +because actually there is no gap. It is simultaneous. He thinks out loud, but there is no +rehearsal, no thinking, no dreaming. He lives life. With thinking and dreaming you miss +life. + +THE END. + + + +Chapter 47: Tantric meditation with light techniques + + +CONSIDER YOUR ESSENCE AS LIGHT RAYS FROM CENTER TO CENTER UP +THE VERTEBRAE, AND SO RISES "LIVINGNESS" IN YOU. + +OR IN THE SPACES BETWEEN, FEEL THIS AS LIGHTNING. + +FEEL THE COSMOS AS A TRANSLUCENT EVER-LIVING PRESENCE. + +Man can be considered in three ways: in terms of the normal, the abnormal and the +supernormal. Western psychology is basically concerned with the abnormal, the +pathological, with the man who has fallen down from the normal, who has fallen down +from the nonn. Eastern psychology, tantra and yoga, consider man from the standpoint of +the supernonnal — of the one who has gone beyond the nonn. Both are abnonnal. One +who is pathological is abnormal because he is not healthy, and one who is supernonnal is +abnormal because he is MORE healthy than any normal human being. The difference is +of negative and positive. + +Western psychology developed as part of psychotherapy. Freud, Jung, Adler and other +psychologists were treating the abnormal man, the man who is mentally ill. Because of +this the whole Western attitude towards man has become erroneous. Freud was studying +pathological cases. Of course, no healthy man would go to him — only those who were +mentally ill. They were studied by him, and because of that study he thought that now he +understood man. Pathological men are not really men, they are ill, and anything based on +a study of them is bound to be deeply erroneous and harmful. + +This has proved harmful because man is looked at from a pathological standpoint. If a +particular state of mind is chosen and that state is ill, pathological, then the whole image +of man becomes disease-based. Because of this attitude, the whole Western society has +fallen down — because the ill man is the base, the perverted has become the foundation. +And if you study only the abnormal, you cannot conceive of any possibility of +supernormal beings. A buddha is impossible for Freud, not conceivable. He must be +fictitious, mythological. A buddha cannot be a reality. Freud has only come in contact +with ill men who are not even nonnal, and whatsoever he says about nonnal man is based +on the study of abnormal man. It is just like a physician who is doing a study. No healthy +man will go to him, there is no need. Only unhealthy people will go. By studying so +many unhealthy people, he creates a picture in his mind of man, but that picture cannot +be of man. It cannot be because man is not only illnesses. And if you base your concept +of man on illnesses, the whole society will suffer. + +Eastern psychology, particularly tantra and yoga, also has a concept of man, but that +concept is based on the study of the supernormal — Buddha, Patanjali, Shankara, +Nagarjuna, Kabir, Nanak — on persons who have reached to the peak of human +potentiality and possibility. The lowest has not been considered, only the highest. + +If you consider the highest your mind becomes an opening; you can grow because now +you know higher reaches are possible. If you consider the lowest, no growth is possible. +There is no challenge. If you are normal you feel happy. It is enough that you are not +perverted, that you are not in a mental asylum. You can feel good, but there is no +challenge. + +But if you seek the supernonnal, the highest possibility that you can become, if someone +has become that possibility, if that possibility has become actual in someone, then a + + + +possibility for growth opens. You can grow. A challenge comes to you, and you need not +be satisfied with yourself. Higher reaches are possible and they are calling you. This must +be understood deeply. Only then will the psychology of tantra be conceivable. + +Whatsoever you are is not the end. You are just in the middle. You can fall down, you +can rise up. Your growth has not finished. You are not the end product; you are just a +passage. Something is constantly growing in you. + +Tantra conceives of and bases its whole technique on this possibility of growth. And +remember, unless you become that which you can become, you will not be fulfilled. You +MUST become that which you can become — it is a must! Otherwise you will be +frustrated, you will feel meaningless, you will feel that there is no purpose in life. You +can carry on, but there can be no joy in it. + +And you may succeed in many other things, but you will fail with yourself. And this is +happening. Someone becomes very rich and everyone thinks that now he has succeeded. +Everyone except himself thinks that he has succeeded. He knows his failure. Wealth is +there, but he has failed. You are a great man, a leader, a politician. Everyone thinks that +they have succeeded, but they have failed. This world is strange: you succeed in +everyone's eyes except your own. + +People come to me daily. They say they have everything, but now what? They are +failures, but where have they failed? As far as outward things are concerned they have +not failed, so why do they feel this failure? Their inner potentiality has remained potent. +They have not flowered. They have not achieved what Maslow calls "self-actualization." +They are failures — inner failures, and ultimately, what others say is meaningless. What +you feel is meaningful. If you feel that you are a failure, others may think that you are a +Napoleon or an Alexander the Great, but it makes no difference. Rather, it depresses you +more. Everyone thinks that you are a success, and now you cannot say that you are not — +but you know you are not. You cannot deceive yourself. As far as self-actualization is +concerned you cannot deceive. Sooner or later you will have to call upon yourself and +look deeply into yourself at what has happened. The life is wasted. + +You have given up an opportunity and gathered things which mean nothing. +Self-actualization refers to the highest peak of your growth, where you can feel a deep +content, where you can say, "This is my destiny, this is for what I was meant, this is why +I am here on earth." Tantra is concerned with that self-actualization — with how to help +you grow more. And remember, tantra is concerned with you, not with ideals. Tantra is +not concerned with ideals; it is concerned with you as you are and as you can become. + +The difference is great. All teachings are concerned with ideals. They say become like +Buddha, become like Jesus, become like this or that. They have ideals, and you have to +become like those ideals. Tantra has no ideal for you. Your unknown ideal is hidden +within you; it cannot be given to you. You are not to become Buddha, there is no need. +One Buddha is enough, and no repetition is of any value. Existence is always unique, it +never repeats; repetition is boredom. Existence is always new, eternally new, so even a +Buddha is not repeated — such a beautiful phenomenon left unrepeated. + +Why? Because even if a Buddha is repeated it will create boredom. What is the use? Only +the unique is meaningful; copies are not meaningful. Only if you are firsthand is your +destiny fulfilled. If you are secondhand, you have missed. + +So tantra never says be like this or that; there is no ideal. + + + +Tantra never talks about ideals; hence, the name "tantra." Tantra talks about techniques — +never about ideals. It talks of HOW you can become; it never says what. It exists because +of that how. Tantra means technique; the very word tantra means technique. It is +concerned with "how" you can become, it is not concerned with what. That "what" will +be supplied by your growth. Just use the technique, and by and by your inner potentiality +will become actual. The uncharted possibility will become opened, and as it opens you +will realize what it is. And no one can say what it is. Unless you become it, no one can +predict what you can become. + +So tantra gives you only techniques — never ideals. This is how it is different from all +moral teachings. Moral teachings always give ideals. Even if they talk about techniques, +those techniques are always for particular ideals. Tantra gives no ideal to you; you ARE +the ideal, and your future is unknown. No ideal from the past can be of any help because +nothing can be repeated, and if it is repeated it is meaningless. + +Zen monks say to remember and be alert. If you meet Buddha in your meditation, kill +him immediately; don't allow him to stand there. Zen monks are Buddha’s followers, and +yet they say kill Buddha immediately if you meet him in your meditation, because the +personality, the ideal of Buddha may become so hypnotizing that you may forget +yourself, and if you forget yourself you have missed the path. + +Buddha is not the ideal; you are the ideal, your unknown future. That has to be +discovered. + +Tantra gives you techniques of discovery. The treasure is within you. So remember this +second thing: it is very difficult to believe that you are the ideal — difficult for you to +believe because everyone is condemning you. No one accepts you, not even you yourself. +You go on condemning yourself. You always think in terms of being like someone else, +and that is false, dangerous. If you go on thinking like that you will become a fake and +everything will be phoney. Do you know from where the word 'phoney' comes? It comes +from telephone. In the early days of the telephone, the transmission was so false, so +unreal, that a real voice and a phoney voice were heard from the telephone — a phoney +voice that was mechanical. The real voice was lost — just in those beginning days. From +there comes the word phoney. If you are imitating someone else, you will become +phoney, you will not be real. A mechanical device will be there all around you, and your +reality, your real voice, will be lost. So don't be phoney, be real, + +Tantra believes in you. That is why there are so few believers in tantra — because no one +believes in himself. Tantra believes in you and says that you are the ideal, so don't imitate +anyone. Imitation will create a pseudo personality around you. You can go on moving +with that pseudo personality thinking it is yourself, but it is not. + +So the second thing to remember is that there is no fixed ideal. You cannot think in terms +of the future; you can only think in terms of the present — just the immediate future in +which you can grow. No fixed future is there, and it is good that there is no fixed future; +otherwise there would be no freedom. If there were a fixed future, man would be a robot. +You have no fixed future. You have multi possibilities; you can grow in many ways. But +the only thing that will give you ultimate contentment is that you grow — that you grow +in such a way that every growth produces further growth. Techniques are helpful because +they are scientific. You are saved from unnecessary wandering, unnecessary groping. If +you don't know any techniques, you will take many lives. You will reach the goal +because the life energy within you will move unless it comes to the point where no + + + +movement is possible. It will go on moving to the highest peak, and that is the reason +why one goes on being bom again and again. Left to yourself you will reach — but you +will have to travel very, very long, and the journey will be very tedious and boring. + +With a master, with scientific techniques, you can save much time, opportunity and +energy. And sometimes within seconds you can grow so much that within lives even you +will not be able to grow that much. If a right technique is used growth explodes, and +these techniques have been used in millions of years of experiments. + +They were not devised by one man; they were devised by many, many seekers, and only +the essence is given here. In these one hundred and twelve techniques, all techniques +from all over the world have been covered. Nowhere does there exist any technique +which has not been covered in this one hundred and twelve; they are the whole spiritual +search in essence. But all the techniques are not for everyone, so you will have to try +them out. Only certain techniques will be helpful to you, and you will have to find them +out. There are two ways: either by your own trial and error, until you stumble upon +something which starts working and you start growing, and then you move in it; or you +surrender to some teacher and he finds out what will suit you. These are the two ways. +You can choose. Now the technique. + +The first technique: + +"CONSIDER YOUR ESSENCE AS LIGHT RAYS RISING FROM CENTER TO +CENTER UP THE VERTEBRAE, AND SO RISES 'LIVINGNESS’ IN YOU." + +Many yoga methods are based on this. First understand what it is; then the application. +The vertebrae, the spine, is the base of both your body and mind. Your mind, your head, +is the end part of your spine. The whole body is rooted in the spine. If the spine is young, +you are young. If the spine is old, you are old. If you can keep your spine young, it is +difficult to become old. Everything depends on your spine. + +If your spine is alive, you will have a very brilliant mind. If the spine is dull and dead, +you will have a very dull mind. The whole yoga tries in many ways to make your spine +alive, brilliant, filled with light, young and fresh. + +The spine has two ends: the beginning is the sex center and the end is SAHASRARA, the +seventh center at the top of the head. The beginning of the spine is attached to the earth, +and sex is the most earthly thing in you. From the beginning center in your spine you are +in contact with nature, with what Sankhya has called PRAKRATI — the earth, the +material. From the last center, or the second pole, SAHASRAR, in the head, you are in +contact with the divine. These are the two poles of your existence. First is sex and second +is the SAHASRAR. There is no word for SAHASRAR in English. These are the two +poles. Either your life will be sex oriented or SAHASRAR oriented. Either your energy +will be flowing down from the sex center back to the earth, or your energy will be +released from the SAHASRAR into the cosmos. From the SAHASRAR you flow into the +BRAHMAN, into the absolute Existence. From sex you flow down into the relative +existence. These are the two flows, the two possibilities. Unless you start flowing +upwards, your misery will never end. You may have glimpses of happiness, but only +glimpses — and very illusory ones. + +When the energy starts moving upwards you will have more and more real glimpses. + + +And once it reaches the SAHASRAR and is released from there, you will have the + + + +absolute bliss with you. That is NIRVANA. Then there is no glimpse; you become the +bliss itself. So the whole thing for yoga and tantra is how to move energy upwards +through the vertebrae, through the spinal column, how to help it move against gravity. + +Sex is very easy because it follows gravitation. The earth is pulling everything down, +back; your sex energy is pulled by the earth. You may not have heard it, but astronauts +have felt this — that the moment they move beyond the earth's gravity they don’t feel +much sexuality. As the body loses weight, sexuality dissolves, disappears. + +The earth is pulling your life energy down and this is natural, because the life energy +comes from the earth. You eat food and you are creating life energy within you; it comes +from the earth, and the earth is pulling it back. Everything goes to its source. And if it +continues to move in this way, life energy going back again and again, and you are +moving in a circle, you will go on moving for lives and lives. You can go on moving this +way infinitely unless you take a jump just like the astronauts. Like the astronauts, you +have to take a jump and move beyond the circle. Then the pattern of earth's gravitation is +broken. It can be broken! + +The techniques for how it can be broken are here — for how the energy can move +vertically and rise up within you, reaching new centers; for how new energies can be +revealed within you, making you a new person with every move. + +And the moment the energy is released from your SAHASRAR, the opposite pole of sex, +you are no more man. Then you don’t belong to this earth; you have become divine. That +is what is meant when we say Krishna is God or Buddha is God. Their bodies are just like +yours — their bodies will have to fall ill and they will have to die — everything happens in +their bodies as it happens to you. Only one thing is not happening in their bodies which is +happening to you: the energy has broken the gravitation pattern. + +But that you cannot see, it is not visible to your eyes. But sometimes when you are sitting +by the side of a Buddha, you can feel this. Suddenly you feel an upsurge of energy within +you, and your energy starts moving upwards. Only then do you know that something has +happened. Just by being in contact with a buddha your energy begins to move upwards +towards the SAHASRAR. A buddha is so powerful that even the earth is less powerful; it +cannot pull your energy downwards. Those who have felt this around a Jesus, a Buddha, +a Krishna, have called them God. They have a different source of energy which is +stronger than the earth. + +How can the pattern be broken? This technique is very useful for breaking the pattern. +First understand something basic. One, if you have observed at all you must have +observed that your sex energy moves with imagination. Just through imagination your +sex center starts functioning. + +Really, without imagination it cannot function. That is why if you are in love with +someone it functions better — because with love imagination enters. If you are not in love +it is very difficult. It will not function. + +This is the reason why male prostitutes were not found in the old days, only women +prostitutes. It is difficult for a male prostitute if he has no love, and how can he have love +just because of money? You can pay a man to have intercourse with you, but if he has no +imagination for you he cannot function. Women can function because their sex is passive. +Really, their functioning is not needed. They can be totally detached; they may not be +feeling anything at all. Their bodies can just be there like corpses. With a prostitute you +are not making love with a real body — only with a dead corpse. But women can easily be + + + +prostitutes because their sex is passive. + +The sex center functions through imagination. That is why even in dreams you can get +erections and ejaculations. They are actual. Dreams are just imagination. It has been +observed that every man, if physically fit, will have at least ten erections in the night. +With every movement of the mind, with only a slight thought of sex, the erection will +come. Your mind has many energies, many faculties, and one is will. But you cannot will +sex. For sex will is impotent. If you try to love someone, you will feel you have gone +impotent. + +So never try. Will never functions with sex; only imagination will function. Imagine, and +the center will start to function. Why am I emphasizing this fact? Because if imagination +helps the energy to move, then you can move it upwards or downwards just by +imagination. You cannot move your blood by imagination; you cannot do anything else +in the body by imagination. But sex energy can be moved by imagination. You can +change its direction. + +This sutra says, "CONSIDER YOUR ESSENCE AS LIGHT RAYS" - t hink of yourself, +your being, as light rays - "FROM CENTER TO CENTER UP THE VERTEBRAE" - +up your spine — "AND SO RISES 'LIVINGNESS’ IN YOU." Yoga has divided your +spine into seven centers. The first is the sex center and the last is SAHASRAR, and +between these two there are five centers. Some systems divide into nine, some into three, +some into four. Division is not very meaningful, you can make your own division. Just +five centers are enough to work with; the first is the sex center, the second is just behind +the navel, the third is just behind the heart, the fourth is behind your two eyebrows, just +in between, in the middle of the forehead. And the fifth, SAHASRAR, is just on the peak +of your head. These five will do. + +This sutra says, "CONSIDER YOURSELF...", which means imagine yourself — close +your eyes and imagine yourself just as if you are light. This is not just imagination. + +In the beginning it is, but it is reality also because everything consists of light. Now +science says that everything consists of electricity, and tantra has always said that +everything consists of light particles — and you also. That is why the Koran says that God +is light. YOU are light! Imagine first that you are just light rays; then move your +imagination to the sex center. Concentrate your attention there and feel that light rays are +rising upwards from the sex center, as if the sex center has become a source of light and +light rays are moving in an upsurge — upwards towards the navel center. Division is +needed because it will be difficult for you to connect your sex center with the +SAHASRAR. So smaller divisions will be of help. If you can connect, no divisions are +needed. You can just drop all divisions from your sex center onwards, and the energy, the +life force will rise up as light towards the SAHASRAR. But divisions will be more +helpful because your mind can conceive of smaller fragments more easily. + +So just feel that the energy — just the light rays — is rising up from your sex center to +your navel like a river of light. Immediately you will feel a warmth rising in you. Soon +your navel will become hot. You can feel the hotness; even others can feel that hotness. +Through your imagination the sex energy will have started to rise. When you feel that +now the second center at the navel has become a source of light, that the rays are coming +and being collected there, then start to move to the heart center. + +As the light reaches the heart center, as the rays are coming, your heartbeat will be + + + +changed. Your breathing will become deeper, and a warmth will come to your heart. Go +on upwards. + +"CONSIDER YOUR ESSENCE AS LIGHT RAYS FROM CENTER TO CENTER UP +THE VERTEBRAE, AND SO RISES 'LIVINGNESS’ IN YOU." And as you will feel +warmth, just side by side you will feel a "livingness," a new life coming to you, an +inward light rising up. Sex energy has two parts: one is physical and one is psychic. In +your body everything has two parts. Just like your body and mind, everything within you +has two parts — one material and the other spiritual. Sex energy has two parts. The +material part is semen; it cannot rise upwards, there is no passage for it. Because of this, +many physiologists of the West say that tantra and yoga methods are nonsense and they +deny them completely. How can sex energy rise up? There is no passage and sex energy +cannot rise. They are right and still wrong. Semen, the material part, cannot rise — but +that is not the whole of it. Really, it is only the body of sex energy, it is not the sex +energy. The sex energy is the psychic part of it, and the psychic part can rise. And for +that psychic part, the spinal passage is used — the spinal passage and its centers. But that +has to be felt and your feelings have gone dead. + +I remember somewhere that a certain psychotherapist wrote about a patient, a woman. + +He was telling her to feel something, but the psychotherapist felt that whatever she did +she was not feeling, but thinking about feeling — and that is a different thing. So the +therapist put his hand on the woman's hand and pressed it, telling her to close her eyes +and relate what she felt. She said immediately, "I feel your hand." + +But the therapist said, "No, this is not your feeling. This is just your thinking, your +inference. I have put my hand in your hand; you say you are feeling my hand. But you +are not. This is inference. What do you feel?" + +So she said, "I feel your fingers." + +The therapist again said, "No, this is not feeling. Don’t infer anything. Just close your +eyes and move to the place where my hand is; then tell me what you feel." + +Then she said, "Oh! I was missing the whole thing. I feel pressure and warmth." + +When a hand touches you, a hand is not felt. Pressure and warmth are felt. The hand is +just inference, it is intellect, not feeling. Warmth and pressure, that is feeling. Now she +was feeling. We have lost feeling completely. You will have to develop feeling; only then +can you do such techniques. Otherwise, they will not function. You will just +intellectualize, you will just think that you are feeling, and nothing will happen. That is +why people come to me and say, "You tell us this technique is so significant, but nothing +happens." + +They have tried, but they are missing a dimension — the feeling dimension. So first you +will have to develop that, and there are some methods which you can try. + +You can do one thing. If you have a small child in your house, follow the child around +for one hour every day. It will be better and more fulfilling than following a buddha. +Allow the child to move on all fours, and you also move on all fours. Just follow the +child moving on all fours, and you will feel for the first time a new life energy coming to +you. You will again become a child. Look at the child and just follow. He will go to +every comer; he will touch everything — not only touch, he will taste everything, he will +smell everything. Just follow, and do whatsoever he is doing. + +You were also a child once; you have done this. The child is feeling. He is not +intellectualizing, he is not thinking. He feels a smell, so he moves to that comer from + + + +where it is coming. He sees an apple, so he tastes it. Just taste like a child. Watch when +he is eating the apple, look at him: he is totally absorbed in it. The whole world has +dropped, the world is no more there — only the apple. Even the apple is not and the child +is not — only the eating. Just follow a small child for one hour. That hour will be so +enriching, you will become again a child. + +Your defense mechanisms will drop, your armor will drop, and you will start looking at +the world as a child looks — from the feeling dimension. + +When you feel that now you can feel, not think, you will enjoy the texture of the carpet +on which you are moving like a child, the pressure, the wannth — and just by innocently +following a child. Man can learn much from children, and sooner or later your real +innocence will erupt. You were once a child and you know what it means to be one. You +have simply forgotten. + +The feeling center must start functioning; only then will these techniques be of any help. +Otherwise you will go on thinking that energy is rising, but there will be no feeling. And +if there is no feeling, imagination is impotent, futile. Only a feeling imagination will give +you a result. You can do many other things and there is no need to make a specific effort +to do them. When you go to sleep just feel your bed, feel the pillow — the coldness. Just +turn onto it; play with the pillow. + +Close your eyes and listen to the noise of the air conditioner, or of the traffic or of the +clock or anything. Just listen. Don’t label, don't say anything. Don’t use the mind. Just +live in the sensation. In the morning, in the first moment of waking, when you feel that +now sleep has gone, don't start thinking. For a few moments you can again be a child — +innocent, fresh. Don't start thinking. Don’t think about what you are going to do and when +you are starting for the office and what train you are going to catch. + +Don't start thinking. You will have enough time for all that nonsense. Just wait. For a few +moments just listen to the noise. A bird is singing or the wind is passing through the trees +or a child is crying or the milkman has come and is making sounds or the milk is being +poured. With anything that happens, feel it. Be sensitive to it, open to it. Allow it to +happen to you, and your sensitivity will grow. + +When taking a shower, feel it all over the body — every drop of water touching you. Feel +the touch, the coldness, the wannth! Try this the whole day whenever you have the +chance, and everywhere there is a chance — everywhere! When just breathing, feel the +breath — its movement within and its going out — just feel it! Just feel your own body. +You have not felt it. + +We are so afraid of our own bodies. No one touches his own body in a loving way. Have +you ever given any love to your own body? The whole civilization is afraid of anyone +touching himself because from childhood touching has been denied. It appears to be +masturbatory to touch oneself in a loving way. But if you cannot touch yourself in a +loving way your body will go dull and dead. It has gone so. Touch your eyes with your +palms. Feel the touch, and your eyes will feel fresh and alive immediately. Feel your +body all over. Feel your lover’s body, your friend's body. Massage is good. Two friends +can massage each other and feel each other's bodies. + +You will become more sensitive. + +Create sensitivity and feeling. Then it will be easy for you to do these techniques, and +then you will feel "livingness" arising in you. Don’t leave this energy anywhere. Allow it + + + +to come to the SAHASRAR. Remember this: whenever you do this experiment, don't +leave it in the middle. You have to complete it. Take care that no one disturbs you. If you +leave this energy somewhere in the middle, it can be harmful. It has to be released. So +bring it to the head and feel as if your head has become an opening. + +In India we have pictured SAHASRAR as a lotus — as a thousand- petalled lotus. +'SAHASRAR' means a thousandpetalled — an opening of a thousand petals. Just +conceive of the lotus with a thousand petals, opened, and from every petal this light +energy is moving into the cosmos. Again, this is a love act — not with nature now, but +with the ultimate. Again, it is an orgasm. + +There are two types of orgasms: one is sexual and the other spiritual. The sexual comes +from the lowest center and the spiritual from the highest center. From the highest you +meet the highest and from the lowest you meet the lowest. Even while actually in the sex +act, you can do this exercise; both the partners can do this. Move the energy upwards, +and then the sex act becomes tantra SADHANA; it becomes meditation. + +But don’t leave the energy somewhere in the body at some center. + +Someone may come and you will have some business, or some phone call will come and +you will have to stop. So do it at such a time that no one will disturb you, and don’t leave +the energy in any center. Otherwise that center where you leave the energy will become a +wound, and you may create many mental illnesses. So be aware; otherwise don’t do this. +This method needs absolute privacy and no disturbance, and it must be done completely. +The energy must come to the head, and it should be released from there. + +You will have various experiences. When you will feel that the rays are starting to come +up from the sex center, there will be erections or sensations at the sex center. Many, +many people come to me very afraid and scared. They say that whenever they start +meditation, when they start to move deep, there is an erection. They wonder, "What is +this?" They are afraid because they think that in meditation sex should not be there. But +you don’t know life's functioning. It is a good sign. It shows that energy is now there +alive. Now it needs movement. So don't become scared and don't think that something is +wrong. It is a good sign. When you start meditation the sex center will become more +sensitive, alive, excited, and in the beginning the excitement will be just the same as any +sexual excitement — but only in the beginning. As your meditation becomes deeper, you +will feel energy flowing up. + +As the energy flows, the sex center becomes silent, less excited. + +When the energy will really move to the SAHASRAR, there will be no sensation at the +sex center. It will be totally still and silent. It will have become completely cool, and the +warmth will have come to the head. And this is physical. When the sex center is excited, +it becomes hot; you can feel that hotness, it is physical. When the energy will move, the +sex center will become cooler and cooler and cooler, and the hotness will come to the +head. + +You will feel dizzy. When the energy comes to the head, you will feel dizzy. Sometimes +you may even feel nausea because for the first time energy has come to the head and your +head is not acquainted with it. It has to become tuned. So don’t become afraid. Sometimes +you may immediately become unconscious, but don’t be afraid. This happens. If so much +energy moves suddenly and explodes in the head, you may become unconscious. But that +unconsciousness cannot remain for more than one hour. Within one hour the energy +automatically falls back or is released. You cannot remain that way for more than one + + + +hour. I say one hour, but in fact it is exactly forty-eight minutes. It cannot be more than +that. It never has been in millions of years of experiments, so don’t be afraid. If you do +become unconscious, it is okay. After that unconsciousness you will feel so fresh that it is +as if you have been in sleep for the first time, in the deepest sleep. + + +Yoga calls it by a special name — YOGA TANDRA: yogic sleep. It is very deep; you +move to your deepest center. But don’t be afraid. And if your head becomes hot, it is a +good sign. Release the energy. Feel as if your head is opening like a lotus flower — as if +energy is being released into the cosmos. As the energy is released, you will feel a +coldness coming to you. You have never felt the coldness that comes after this hotness. +But do the technique completely; never do it incompletely. + +The second technique: + +”OR IN THE SPACES BETWEEN, FEEL THIS AS LIGHTNING.” + +This is a very similar method with a slight difference: "OR IN THE SPACES +BETWEEN, FEEL THIS AS LIGHTNING." Between one center and another, as rays are +coming, you can feel it like lightning — just a jump of light. For some people the second +will be more suitable and for others the first. This is why there is a modification. There +are people who cannot imagine things gradually and there are people who cannot imagine +in jumps. If you can think and imagine gradually, then the first method is good. But if +you try the first method and you suddenly feel that from one center the rays jump directly +to the second, then don't do the first method. The second is better for you. "FEEL THIS +AS LIGHTNING" — like a spark of light jumping from one center to the next. And the +second is more real because, really, light jumps. + +There is no gradual step-by-step growth. Light is a jump. + +Look at the electric light. You think it is constant, but that is illusory. There are gaps, but +the gaps are so small that you cannot detect them. Electricity comes in jumps. One jump, +and then there is a gap of darkness. Another jump, and then there is a gap of darkness. + +But you never feel the gap because the jump is so fast. Otherwise, every moment there is +darkness. Again there is a jump, light comes, then again darkness. Light jumps, it never +travels. For those who can conceive of jumps, the second modification is best. "OR IN +THE SPACES BETWEEN, FEEL THIS AS LIGHTNING." Just try it. If you feel good +with the rays coming gradually, it is okay. If you don’t feel good and rays are jumping, +then forget about rays. Think of this as lightning in the sky, in the clouds, just jumping +from one place to another. + +For women the first technique will be easier and for men the second. The feminine mind +can conceive of gradualness more easily and the male jumps more easily. The male mind +is "jumpy"; it jumps from one thing to another. There is a subtle uneasiness in the male +mind. The female mind has a gradual process, it is not jumpy. That is why female and +male logic are very different. A man goes on jumping from one thing to another, and for +women this is inconceivable. For them there must be growth — gradual growth. + +But choose. Try these, and choose whichever you feel is good for you. + +Two or three things more about this method. With lightning you may feel such hotness +that it may seem unbearable. If you feel that, don't try it. Lightning can give you much +heat. If you feel this, that it is unbearable, then don’t try this. Then with the first method, + + + +if you are at ease, then it is good. Otherwise with uneasiness don’t try it. Sometimes the +explosion can be so great that you may become afraid of it, and once afraid you will +never be able to do it again. Then fear enters. + +So one has to be aware always not to become afraid of anything. If you feel that fear will +come and it is too much for you, don’t try it. Then the first method with light rays is best. +If you feel that even with light rays too much hotness is coming to you — and it depends +because people differ — then conceive of the rays as cool, imagine them as cool. Then +instead of feeling warmth you will feel a coldness with everything. That too will be +effective. So you can decide; try and decide. Remember, with this technique, and with +others also, if you feel very uneasy or anything unbearable, don't do it. There are other +methods, and this one may not be for you. With unnecessary disturbance inside, you will +create more problems than you will solve. + +In India, because of this, we have developed a particular yoga which we call SAHAJ +YOGA. + +SAHAJ means spontaneous, easy, natural. Always remember SAHAJ. If you feel any +technique spontaneously coming to you, if you feel more affinity with it, if you feel better +with it — more healthy, more alive, more at home — then that is the method for you. + +Move with it; you can trust it. Don't create unnecessary problems. And the inner +mechanism is very complex. If you do something which is too much for you, you may +destroy many things. So it is better to move with something which feels hannonious to +you. + +The third technique: + +"FEEL THE COSMOS AS A TRANSLUCENT EVER-LIVING PRESENCE.” + +This again is concerned with light: ’’FEEL THE COSMOS AS A TRANSLUCENT +EVER-LIVING PRESENCE." If you have taken any drugs such as LSD or some such +thing, the whole world around you becomes a light phenomenon of colors that are +translucent, alive. This is not because of LSD. The world is such, but your eyes have +become dull. The LSD is not creating a colorful world around you; the world is already +colorful, nothing is wrong with the world. It is a rainbow of colors — a mystery of colors +and translucent light. But your eyes have become dull. That is why you can never feel it +in such colorfulness. + +LSD is just clearing your eyes. It is not making the world colorful; it is just helping your +dullness to go chemically, and then the whole world erupts before you. + +It is a new thing. Even an ordinary chair becomes a marvelous phenomenon. Just a shoe +on the floor takes on new colors, a new youth. Ordinary traffic noise becomes musical. +Trees you have always seen but never looked at are born anew though you have always +passed them by and you know you have seen them. Every leaf of a tree is a miracle. + +And this is how reality is. It is not LSD which is creating this reality. LSD is just +destroying your dullness, your insensitivity, and you look at the world as one should +really look. But LSD can give you only a glimpse, and if you depend on it, sooner or later +even LSD will not be able to remove your dullness. Then you will need greater doses, +and then you will become immune to greater doses. And, really, if you then leave LSD or +other drugs, the world will be duller than it has ever been. Then you will become even +more insensitive. + +Just a few days ago a girl came to see me. She said she could not feel any orgasm in the + + + +love act. She has tried many men, but she cannot feel any orgasm. The peak never comes, +and she has become frustrated. So I asked her to tell me her whole love and sex life — the +whole story. Then I discovered that she had been using an electric vibrator. Now in the +West they are using these. Once you use an electric vibrator as a male penis, then no male +can satisfy you because an electric vibrator is, after all, an electric vibrator. + +Then your vagina and clitoris will go dead, dull, and then orgasm will become +impossible. Then there won’t be any possibility of any orgasm. You will now need a more +powerful electric vibrator, and this can go to such an extreme that your total sexual +mechanism will become stony. And this is happening to our every sense. If you use any +outer device, you will become dull. + +LSD will make you dull ultimately because with it you are not growing. If YOU grow, +then it is a different process. Then you become more sensitive, and as you become more +sensitive the world becomes different. Now you can sense many things you never sensed +before because you were not sensitive. + +This technique is based on inner sensitivity. First grow in sensitivity. Just close your +doors, make the room dark and light a small candle. Sit near the candle with a very loving +attitude — rather, with a prayerful attitude. Just pray to the candle, "Reveal yourself to +me." Take a bath, throw cold water on your eyes, then sit in a very prayerful mood before +the candle. Look at it and forget everything else. Just look at the small candle — the flame +and the candle. Go on looking at it. After five minutes you will feel that many things are +changing in the candle. They are not changing in the candle, remember; your eyes are +changing. + +With a loving attitude, with the whole world closed out, with total concentration, with a +feeling heart, just go on looking at the candle and the flame. + +Then you will discover new colors around the flame, new shades which you were never +aware were there. They are there; the whole rainbow is there. Wherever light is, the +rainbow is there because light is all color. You need a subtle sensitivity. Just feel it and +go on looking at it. Even if tears start flowing, go on looking at it. Those tears will help +your eyes to be more fresh. + +Sometimes you may feel that the flame, the candle, has become mysterious. It is not the +ordinary candle you brought with you; it has taken on a new glamor, a subtle divineness +has come into it. Go on doing this. You can also do this with many other things. + +One of my friends was telling me that a group of five or six persons had been +experimenting with rocks. I had told them how to experiment, and then they reported to +me. They were experimenting with rocks on the bank of a lonely river. They were trying +to feel them with their hands, with their faces, touching the rocks with their tongues, +smelling the rocks. In every way possible they were feeling the rocks — just ordinary +rocks which they found on the bank. + +They tried this for a whole hour, everyone with a rock. And then, my friend reported, +there was a miracle. Everyone said, "Could I keep this rock? I have fallen in love with +it!" An ordinary rock! If you have a sympathetic relationship with it, you will fall in love. +And if you don’t have that sensitivity, then even with a very beautiful person you are with +a rock; you cannot fall in love. + + +Sensitivity must grow. Your every sense must become more alive. Then you can + + + +experiment with this technique. "FEEL THE COSMOS AS A TRANSLUCENT EVER- +LIVING PRESENCE." Everywhere light is — in many, many shapes, forms, light is +happening everywhere. Look at it! And everywhere light is because the whole +phenomenon is based on the foundation of light. Look at a leaf or a flower or a rock, and +sooner or later you will feel rays coming out of it. Just wait patiently. Don’t be in a hurry +because nothing is revealed when you are in a hurry. In a hurry you are dull. Wait silently +with anything, and you will discover a new phenomenon which was always there, but of +which you were not alert — not aware of it. + +"FEEL THE COSMOS AS A TRANSLUCENT EVER-LIVING PRESENCE," and your +mind will become completely silent as you feel the presence of the ever-living existence. +You will be just a part in it, just a note in the great symphony. No burden, no tension... +the drop has fallen into the ocean. But great imagination will be needed in the beginning, +and if you are also trying with other sensitivity training it will be helpful. + +You can try many ways. Just take someone's hand into your hand. Close your eyes and +feel the life in the other. Feel it, and allow it to move towards you. Feel your own life and +allow it to move towards the other. Sit near a tree and touch the bark of the tree. + +Close your eyes and feel the life arising in the tree, and you change immediately. + +I have heard about one experiment. A doctor was experimenting with people to see +whether their feelings changed their biochemistry. Now he has reported that feeling +changes biochemistry immediately. He experimented with a group of twelve persons. He +collected their urine before the experiment, and the urine was ordinary, normal. + +Each person was put under a different stress. One was shown a film of horror, anger, +violence, cruelty — it was just a film — for thirty minutes he was shown a film of horror. +Of course, with the film his emotions changed. He felt stress. To another a very joyful +film was shown. He felt happy. And so on went the experiment for twelve persons. Then +their urine was taken again and the urine analysis showed that everyone's urine was +different now. The chemicals had changed in the body. The person who felt horror was ill +now; the person who felt hope, happiness, joy, was healthy now. His urine was different, +the chemicals of the body were different. + +You are not aware of what you are doing with yourself. When you go to see a murder +film, you don’t know what you are doing. You are changing your body chemistry. If you +are reading a detective novel, you don’t know what you are doing. You are killing +yourself. You will become excited, you will become afraid, a tension will come to you. + +That is how you enjoy the detective novel. The more tense you become, the more you +enjoy it. The more the suspense over what is going to happen, the more you get excited — +and you are changing your body chemistry. + +All these techniques also change your body chemistry. If you feel the whole world as +filled with life, light, then you are changing your body chemistry. And this is a chain +reaction. When your body chemistry changes, you can look at the world and it will look +more alive. And if it looks more alive, your body chemistry will change again, and then it +becomes a chain. + +If this method is done for three months, you will be living in a different world because +you will be different now. + + +THE END. + + + +Chapter 48: The potentiality of the seed + + +The first question: + +Question 1 + +"LAST NIGHT YOU SAID THAT A KRISHNA, A CHRIST, A BUDDHA, THEY ARE +THE CLIMAX OF HUMAN POSSIBILITY AND GROWTH, AND THEN YOU SAID +THAT YOGIC AND TANTRIC PSYCHOLOGY PUT NO IDEAL BEFORE MAN +AND THAT TO HAVE AN IDEAL IS A MISTAKE ACCORDING TO TANTRA. IN +THIS REFERENCE PLEASE EXPLAIN WHAT IS THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN +AN INSPIRATION AND AN IDEAL. WHAT IS THE SIGNIFICANCE OF +INSPIRATION IN A SEEKER’S LIFE? PLEASE TELL WHETHER EVEN BEING +INSPIRED BY A GREAT MAN IS A MISTAKE ON THE PATH OF A +MEDITATOR." + +A Buddha, a Krishna or a Christ, they are not ideals for YOU; you are not to follow them. +If you follow them you will miss them, and your own buddhahood will never be +achieved. Buddhahood is the ideal, not Buddha. Christhood is the ideal, not Jesus. +Buddhahood is different from Gautam Buddha; christhood is different from Jesus. Jesus +is only one of the christs. You can become a christ, but you can never become a Jesus. +You can become a buddha, but you can never become Gautam. Gautam became a buddha +and YOU can become a buddha. Buddhahood is a quality, it is an experience! Of course, +when Gautam became a buddha, Gautam had his own individuality. You have your own +individuality. When you will become a buddha, these two buddhas will not be the same. +The inner most experience will be the same, but the expression will be different — +absolutely different. + +No comparison is possible. Only at the innermost core will you be the same. + +Why? Because at the innermost core there is no individuality. The individual is on the +periphery. The deeper you move, the more the individual dissolves. At the innennost core +you are as if no one. At the innennost core you are just a deep void, a nothingness — a +SHUNYA, a zero. And because of this nothingness there is no difference, because two +nothings cannot be different. But two somethings are bound to be different. Two +"somethings" can never be the same and two "nothings" can never be different. When +one becomes just absolutely nothing, a zero point, that is similar in a Jesus, in a Krishna, +in a Buddha. When you will reach to the ultimate, you will reach to this SHUNYA — this +nothingness. + +But your personality, your expression of that ecstasy, is bound to be different. A Meera +will dance; a Buddha can never dance. It is impossible to conceive of Buddha dancing, it +looks absurd. But Meera sitting under a bodhi tree like a Buddha also looks absurd. She +will lose everything, she will not be a Meera at all; she will be imitation. The real Meera +can only be conceived of as dancing in ecstasy in her own love madness. That is her +expression. The innermost core is the same. With Buddha sitting under the bodhi tree and +Meera dancing in mad ecstasy, the innennost core is the same. In the dancing Meera and +in the silently sitting Buddha who is just like a statue, the innermost core is the same but +the periphery is different. + +The dancing and the silent sitting are just on the periphery. If you move within Meera, as + + + +you go deeper the dance will cease, the Meera will cease. If you go deep into Buddha, the +sitting will cease, the Buddha will cease as an individual. + +You can become a buddha, but you can never become a Gautam buddha: that is what is +meant. Don’t make them your ideals; otherwise you will start imitating them. And what +can you do if you imitate? You can force something from without, but that will be a fake +phenomenon. You will become pseudo — just painted. You will look Buddha-like — more +than Buddha. You can look, but that will be just a look, an appearance; deep down you +will remain the same — and this will create a duality, a conflict, an inner anguish, and you +will be in suffering. + +You can be in bliss only where you are authentically yourself. You can never feel any +happiness when you are acting as someone else. So remember tantra's message: YOU are +the ideal. You are not to imitate anyone; you are to discover yourself. Looking at a +buddha, there is no need to imitate him. When you are looking at a buddha, the +possibility hits deep in you that something of the beyond can happen. Buddha is just a +symbol that something has happened to this man — and if it can happen to this man, it can +happen to EVERY man. Then the whole possibility of humanity is revealed. + +In a Jesus, in a Meera, in Chaitanya, just a possibility is revealed, the future is revealed. + +You need not be whatsoever you are. Something more is possible. So Buddha is just a +symbol of the future. Don't imitate him; rather, let his life, his being, the phenomenon +that is happening, become a new thirst in you, that is all. You must not be content with +yourself as you are right now. Let Buddha become a discontent in you, a thirst to +transcend, to go beyond, to move into the unknown. When you reach to the peak of your +own being, you will know what happened to Buddha under the bodhi tree or what +happened to Jesus on the cross or what happened to Meera when she was dancing in the +streets. You will know, but your expression will be your own. You are not going to be a +Meera or a Buddha or a Jesus. You are going to be yourself, and you have never been +before. You are unique. + +So nothing can be said; you are not predictable. No one can say what will happen, how +you will manifest it. Whether you will sing, dance, paint or remain silent no one can say. +And it is good that nothing can be said, nothing can be predicted. That is the beauty. If it +is predictable that you will be like this or that, then you will become a mechanical thing. +Predictions are possible only about mechanical devices. Human consciousness is +unpredictable; that is its freedom. So when tantra says don’t follow ideals, it doesn’t mean +to deny Buddha. No, it is not a denial. Really, it is how you can find your own +buddhahood. + +Following another, you will miss it. Following your own path, you can gain it, you can +achieve it. + +Someone came to a Zen master, Bokuju. Bokuju's master was very famous, well known, +a very great man, so someone asked "Are you really following your master?" + +Bokuju said, "Yes, I am following him." + +But the man who asked the question was disturbed because it was well known all over +the country that Bokuju was not following his master at all. So the man said, "Are you +trying to deceive me? Everyone knows and you are also aware that you are not following +your master at all, and still you say that you are following. What do you mean?" + +Bokuju said, "I am following my master — because my master never followed his master. +This is what I have learned from him. He was himself!" + + + +This is how a Buddha, a Jesus is to be followed. This is how! They are unique! If you are +really following them, YOU must be unique. + +Buddha never followed anyone, and he achieved enlightenment only in that moment +when he had completely stopped following. When he became himself, when he left all +paths, all teachings, all doctrines, then he could achieve. If you follow him, you are not +following him. It is not paradoxical, it only looks so. If you follow him as a dead routine, +if you imitate him, you are not following him. He never followed anyone, and only then +could he become the peak. + +Understand him, don't follow him; and then a subtle following will happen. But that is +inner — not an imitation. + +In Nietzsche's great work THUS SPOKE ZARATHUSTRA, the last message of +Zarathustra to his disciple is "Beware of me. Now I have told everything that was to be +told to you. Now beware of me. Don’t follow me; just forget me. Leave me and go +away." + +This is the last message of all the great masters. No great master would like to make you +a puppet because then he is killing you. He is a murderer then. He will help you to be +yourself. And if you cannot be yourself in the intimacy and communication with your +master, then where will you be yourself? + +The master means an opportunity for you to be yourself. Only small minds, narrow minds +who pretend to be masters and who are not masters, will try to impose themselves on +you. Great masters will help you to grow on your own path, and great masters will create +every barrier so that you don’t become a victim of following. They will create every +barrier! They will not allow it because your tendency will be to follow. It is easy, +imitation is easy; to be authentic is arduous. And when you imitate you don’t feel +responsible for it, the master is responsible. No great master has ever allowed anyone to +imitate. He will create every hindrance so that you cannot imitate him. He will throw you +by every means to yourself. + + +I am reminded of one Chinese saint who was celebrating his master's enlightenment day. +Many followers had come. They said, "But we never heard that this man was your +master. We never knew that you belonged to this man." That old man was dead. They +said, "Only today did we come to hear and know that you are celebrating your master's +enlightenment day. This man was your master? But how? We never saw you with him!" +The saint replied, "I had been with him, but he had refused. He had refused to become my +master, and because of his refusal I could become myself. Now, whatsoever I am is +because of his refusal. I am his disciple. He could have accepted me; then I would have +thrown all responsibility on his shoulders. But he refused, and he was the last man. There +was no comparison. When he refused, I could not go to anyone else because he was the +only shelter. If he had refused, then there was no meaning, no purpose in going +anywhere. I left going to anyone. He was the last. If he would have accepted me, I would +have forgotten myself. But he refused, and he refused very rudely. The refusal became a +shock and a challenge, and I decided that now I would not go to anyone. If this man had +refused, then there was no one worth going to. Then I started working on my own, and +only then did I realize by and by why he had refused. He had thrown me to myself, and +only then did I know that he had accepted me. + + + +Otherwise why should he refuse?" + +This looks contradictory, but this is how the deeper dynamism of consciousness works. +Masters are mysterious. You cannot judge them; you cannot be sure what they are doing +unless the whole thing happens. Then only retrospectively will you be able to know what +they were doing. Now it is impossible. On the middle path you cannot judge what is +happening, what is being done. But one thing is certain: imitation cannot be allowed. +Inspiration is a different thing. Through inspiration you start on the journey, not on any +effort of copying. You move on your own path. Inspiration is just a challenge. A thirst +arises, and then you move. + +Tantra says be inspired, but don’t become imitators. Always remember that you are your +own goal. No one else can be, and unless you achieve that point from where you can say, +"I have achieved my destiny and now I am fulfilled," don’t stop. Go on transcending, go +on being in discontent, go on moving. And if you don’t make any ideal, then you can be +enriched by everyone. The moment you become obsessed with an ideal, you are closed. If +you become obsessed with Buddha, then Jesus is not for you, then how can Mohammed +be for you? Then you are obsessed with an ideal; then you are trying to copy it. Then all +the contrary ones, all the different ones are inimical in your mind. How can a follower of +Mahavira conceive of being open to Mohammed? It is impossible. + +He is totally different. Not only different, they are contraries. They look like polar +opposites. If you put both in your mind you will be in deep conflict, so you cannot put +both. + +That is why followers are always enemies of others' followers. They create enmity in the +world. A Hindu cannot conceive that Mohammed can be enlightened; a Mohammedan +cannot conceive that Mahavira can be enlightened; a follower of Krishna cannot conceive +that Mahavira can be enlightened, that Jesus can be enlightened. Jesus looks so sad and +Krishna looks so blissful. Krishna’s bliss and Jesus' sadness are total opposite poles. + +Jesus' followers cannot conceive of Krishna being enlightened. So much misery in the +world and he is playing on his flute? It looks to be too selfish. The whole world is +suffering, and he goes on dancing with his GOPIS? + +The followers of Jesus will think this to be profane — but I say "followers." A Jesus and a +Buddha and a Krishna can exist together without any problem, without any conflict. +Rather, they will enjoy each other very much — but not the followers. Why? Why is this +so? This will be so because there is a deep psychological reason. The follower is not +concerned with Mohammed or Mahavira; he is concerned with himself. If he thinks both +are good, he will be in difficulty. Then whom to follow and what to do? Mohammed is +with his sword in his hand and Mahavira says that even to kill an insect means that for +lives you will suffer. + +Mohammed is with his sword, so what to do? Mohammed goes to war, and Mahavira +escapes from life completely. He escapes so much that he is afraid even to breathe, +because while you breathe, many lives — many, many lives — are killed through it. He is +afraid to breathe and Mohammed goes to war. + +How can a follower of either make accommodations for the opposite? Then his heart will +be divided and he will be in constant conflict. To avoid this, he says that everyone else is +wrong and only this is right. But this is his problem. This is created because he is trying +to imitate. There is no need. If you are not an imitator, then you can taste the water of +many rivers and many wells, and there is no problem if the taste differs. Rather, it is + + + +beautiful. You are enriched by this. Then you are open to Mohammed and Mahavira and +Christ and Zarathustra and everyone. They all inspire you towards yourself. They are not +ideals; they all help you to be yourself. They are not pointing towards themselves, they +are pointing towards you in different ways, in different methods. They are pointing to one +goal, and that is YOU + +Laura Huxley has written a book. The name of the book is YOU ARE NOT THE +TARGET. But I tell you, you ARE the target of all these — of Buddha, of Mahavira, of +Krishna, of Christ. They all indicate towards you. You are the target, you are the goal. +Through you life is trying, striving, to achieve a unique peak. + +Be happy about it! Be grateful about it! Life is trying to achieve a unique goal through +you, and that goal can be achieved only through you. No one else can achieve it. You are +meant for it, you are destined for it. So don't waste time following others. But that doesn’t +mean not to get inspired. Really, if you are not following anyone you can become +inspired easily. If you are following, you have become dead. You will not get inspired. +Inspiration is an openness; following is being closed. + +The second question: + +Question 2 + +"YOU SPOKE OF WESTERN PSYCHOLOGY BEING ROOTED IN FREUDIAN +CONCEPTS OF PATHOLOGY AND OF EASTERN PSYCHOLOGY USING THE +SUPERNORMAL AS THE BASE FROM WHICH TO EVALUATE A MAN. BUT AS I +LOOK AROUND ME IN THE MODERN WORLD, I SEE THAT MOST PEOPLE FIT +FREUD’S CATEGORIES OF PATHOLOGY. ONE IN A MILLION FITS THE +CATEGORY OF SUPERNORMAL AND A SMALL NUMBER ACTUALLY FIT THE +SOCIETAL IDEAL OF NORMAL. WHY IS THERE SO MUCH PATHOLOGY +NOWADAYS AND WHAT WOULD YOU CONSIDER TO BE THE DEFINITION OF +NORMAL?" + +Many things will have to be understood. It is not so — it is not that very few are there +who achieve their peaks. Many are there, but you don’t have the eyes to see them. +Whenever you look around you, you see that which you can see. How can you see that +which you cannot see? Your capacity to see determines many things. You hear that which +you can hear, not that which is there. + +If a buddha passes, you may not be able to recognize. And you really were there when +Buddha passed, but you missed him. You were there! You were there when Jesus was +alive, but you crucified him. It is difficult to see because you see in your own ways. You +have concepts, you have categories, you have attitudes. Through them you look at a +Buddha and a Jesus. + +Jesus looked like a criminal to you. When Jesus was crucified he was crucified with two +other criminals; on each side there was a thief. Three persons were crucified together, and +Jesus was just between two thieves. Why? He was considered to be an immoral criminal +somehow and you were there to judge. Even if Jesus comes right now, you will judge +again in the same way because your judgment, your criteria, have not changed. + +Jesus lived and stayed with anyone and everyone. He stayed in a prostitute's house, and +the whole village went against him. But his values were different. The prostitute came, +washed his feet with her tears and said, "I am guilty. I am a sinner and you are my only + + + +hope. If you come to my home, I will be relieved of my guilt. I will become alive again. + +If Jesus could come to my house, then I am accepted." + +So Jesus went. He stayed there, but the whole town went against him. What type of man +is he, staying with a prostitute? But for Jesus love is the value, and no one has given such +a loving invitation ever. + +He couldn’t say no. And if Jesus had said no, he could not have been an enlightened man. +Then he would have just been seeking after social respectability. He was NOT seeking +after respectability. + +In another village, the whole town came to Jesus with a woman who had sinned. In the +Old Testament it is written that if someone sins she should be stoned to death. It is not +that HE should be, it is that SHE should be stoned to death, because only women sin; +man never sins — because all these scriptures are written by men. And this was a great +problem, so they asked Jesus about it. They were playing a trick, because if Jesus would +have said, "No, don’t kill this woman, don’t be the judges," then they could say, "You are +against the scriptures." And if Jesus would have said, "Yes, kill this woman, stone her to +death," then they would say, "Where has gone your message 'Love your enemy’ and +where has gone your message 'Judge ye not that ye should be not judged’?" + +So they were playing a trick. They were creating a dilemma — a logical dilemma. +Whatsoever Jesus would have said, he would be trapped. But you cannot trap an +enlightened man, it is impossible. It is impossible, and the more you try to trap him you +will get trapped with him. So Jesus said, "The scripture is absolutely correct. But come +forwards only those who have never sinned. Take these stones in your hands and murder +this woman, but only those who have never sinned." + +The crowd started disappearing. Those who were standing in front went back — because +who will stone this woman? + +But they became enemies of Jesus. And when I say "they," I mean you. You have always +been here. You cannot recognize, you cannot see. You are blind! That is why you always +feel that the world is bad and there is no enlightenment — that everyone is pathological. It +is not so, but you can only see pathology because you are pathological. You can +understand illness because you are ill. You cannot understand health because you have +never been healthy. The language of health simply escapes you. + +I have heard about one Jewish mystic, Baal Shem. Someone came and asked Baal Shem, +"Which is more significant, which is more valuable — wealth or wisdom?" + +The man was asking the question for a reason, so Baal Shem laughed and said, "Of +course, wisdom is more significant, more valuable." + +Then the man said, "Then, Baal Shem, the second question: I always see you, the wise +man, waiting on the wealthy. You always go to rich people's houses. I have never seen +any wealthy man waiting on you, the wise one, and you say that wisdom is more valuable +than wealth. Then explain this phenomenon to me." + +Baal Shem laughed and said, "Yes, wise men go to the wealthy ones because they are +wise and they know the value of wealth, and the wealthy ones are just wealthy — simply +wealthy and nothing else — and they cannot understand the value of wisdom. + +Of course, I go — because I understand the value of wealth. And those poor idiots? They +are just wealthy — nothing else. They cannot understand the value of wisdom, so they +never come to me." + + + +If you see a saint going to a palace, you will say, "Okay! This man is not the saint." It is +finished because you look through your own eyes. Wealth has meaning for you. You can +only follow a saint who renounces wealth because you are wealth obsessed. You look +through you, and whatsoever you say is more about you than about anyone else. It is +always about you; you are the reference. When you say that Buddha is not enlightened, +you don't mean that. You simply mean, "For me he does not look enlightened." + +But who are you? And does his enlightenment depend in any way on your attitude, your +approach, your standpoint? You have fixed categories of thought and you go on using +them. To you pathology is recognizable, but enlightenment is not. And you cannot +understand that which is higher than you — remember. You can only understand that +which is lower than you or at the most on the same level. You cannot understand the +higher, that is impossible. To understand the higher you will have to move higher. You +can understand the lower. + +Look at it in this way: a madman cannot understand you. It is impossible for a madman to +understand you; he looks through his madness. But you can understand a madman. + +He is lower than you. The normal human being can understand abnormals who have gone +below, pathological, but he cannot understand higher ones. Even a Freud is afraid. + +Jung has written in his memoirs that once it happened to him that he wanted to analyze +Freud's dreams. He was one of Freud's greatest disciples. They were traveling to the +United States on a ship, so for many days they were together. One day Jung gathered +courage. He was the most intimate disciple in those days, and he asked Freud, "I would +like to analyze your dreams, so just tell me any dream. For many, many days we will be +together, so I will analyze it." + +What did Freud say? Freud said, "What do you mean? If you analyze my dreams I will +lose my authority. I cannot tell you my dreams. "He was so afraid because in his dreams +the same pathology, the same illnesses will be revealed as he is revealing in others' +dreams. He said, "I cannot lose my authority. I cannot tell you about my dreams." + +Freud, the greatest psychologist of this age, is prone to all the illnesses that anyone else +is. When Jung said that "I am going to leave you," he fell from his chair and became +unconscious. He swooned. For hours he was unconscious because he was so shocked just +by the idea of a disciple leaving him, just by a disciple saying, "I am going to leave you." +If you say to a buddha, "I am going to leave you," can you conceive of him falling down +and becoming unconscious? Even with all of the ten thousand disciples leaving him, he +will be happy — so happy that he will feel it will be good if you go. + +Why? Your psychologists are also like you. They are not from above. They have the +same problems, so one psychologist goes to another psychologist to be analyzed. It is not +like one doctor going to another doctor to be treated. For doctors it is okay; they can be +forgiven. But for psychologists it seems absurd. One psychologist going to another to be +analyzed? What does it mean? He is an ordinary man. Psychology is just a profession. +Buddha is not in any profession, he is not an ordinary man. He has awakened to a new +reality; he has reached to a new state of being. Now he can look from a peak. He can +understand you, but you cannot understand him. And howsoever he tries, it is really +impossible to make you understand him. You will go on misunderstanding him unless +you are caught not by his words, but by his personality — unless you are caught by his +magnetism, not by his words. Unless you become just like an iron piece and you are +caught by his magnetism, you will not be able to understand him; you will + + + +misunderstand. That is why you cannot see. But the world always has its enlightened +persons. Pathology is recognized because we are pathological, so we can see and +understand it. + +Secondly, even if there is only one — only a single human being who has ever achieved +enlightenment throughout human history, even if there is only one buddha, he is enough +to show you the possibility. + +If it can happen to one human being, why can it not happen to you? If one seed can +become a flower, then every seed has the potentiality to become a flower. You may be +just a seed, but now you know your future. Now you are aware that much more is +possible. + +But with the human mind the reverse is happening. It has been happening always. You +see a cocoon and then it breaks, and then the butterfly moves. With man it seems to be +quite the reverse. Man is bom as the butterfly, and then he enters the cocoon. Every child +is more buddha-like than he will ever be again. Look at a child, look at the eyes. They are +more buddha-like than any adult's eyes. The way he sits, the way he moves — the grace, +the beauty, the living in the moment, even his anger is beautiful. It is so total, and +whenever anything is total it is beautiful. + +Look at a child in anger jumping and screaming. Just look! Don't be concerned with +yourself, that he is disturbing you. Just look at the phenomenon. The anger is beautiful — +because the child is so totally in it that nothing is left behind. He IS the anger, and he is +so authentic that nothing is being suppressed. He is not withholding, he has moved and +become anger. Look at the child when he loves, when he welcomes you, when he comes +near to you: he is like a buddha. But soon you will help him, the society will help him to +enter the cocoon, and then he will die in it. + + +Prom the cradle we enter into the grave immediately. That is why so much pathology is +there — because no one is allowed to be natural. The pathology is forced. You are caged, +imprisoned in a dead pattern, and then your spontaneous being suffers and you cannot +come out of it. That is why so much pathology is there. This pathology is man-created — +and the more man becomes civilized, the more pathological he becomes. So now this is a +criterion: if in your country there are less madmen, know well that you are less civilized. +If in your country the madmen are growing, and everyone is going insane and everyone is +going to the psychoanalyst, know well you are the most civilized country in the world. +When any country achieves the optimum, everyone will have become mad. Civilization +drives you mad because it is not allowing you to be your natural self. Everything is +suppressed, and with suppression everything is disturbed. You cannot even breathe +naturally; anything else is out of the question. Even your breath is unnatural. You cannot +breathe deeply because the society does not allow you deep breathing. + +Breathe deeply, because if you take deep breaths you cannot suppress your instincts. If +you want to suppress anything, you can observe the changes in breathing in yourself. If +you are angry and you want to suppress it, what will you do? Immediately you will stop +breathing. + +With anger breathing goes deep, because anger will need a hot flow of blood in you, +anger will need more oxygen. Anger will need some chemical changes within you, and +through breathing those changes happen. So whenever you feel angry and you want to + + + +repress it, you will not be able to breathe naturally. You will take shallow breaths. + +Look at a child and tell him not to do something. Immediately his breathing will be +shallow. Then he will not be able to breathe deeply, because if he takes deep breaths he +cannot follow your commands. Then he will do whatsoever he likes to do. So no one is +even taking deep breaths. If you take deep breaths, your sex center is massaged from +within and the society is against this. Take slow breaths, shallow breaths. Don’t go deep, +then the sex center is not hit! + +Really, civilized man has become incapable of deep sexual orgasm because he cannot +take deep breaths. In the love act your breathing must be so deep that your whole body +becomes involved. Otherwise you will not achieve orgasm, and then you will feel +frustrated. So many people come to me and they say, "There is no pleasure in sex. We go +on doing it like a mechanical act, and energy is only lost. After it we feel frustrated, +depressed." The reason is not sex, the reason is only that they are not getting into it +totally. It becomes local, so only semen is released. Then they feel weak, and nothing is +gained through it. + + +If the whole body is involved like an animal, if every cell of the body is excited and starts +shaking, if the whole body becomes like an electric force and feeling moves, if you +become egoless, headless, and thinking is not there, if you are the body moving in a +rhythm, vibrating in a rhythm, then you will have a deep pleasure out of it. You will feel +relaxed — in a certain sense, fulfilled. + +But this cannot happen because you cannot take deep breaths. You are so afraid... Look +at the body. The body has two poles. One pole is for intake — your head is for intake. The +upper pole is for intake of food, air, impressions, thoughts, anything. You take in from +the upper part; this is one pole. The lower body is for release. It is not for intake, you +cannot take anything in from the lower. The lower body is to release, to relax. You take +from the upper, and from the lower you release it. + +But the civilized man only takes in — never releases. That creates pathology. You go +mad. It is just like eating food and then continuing to store it, never defecating. You will +go mad. The other pole has to be used. If someone is a miser, automatically he becomes +constipated. Look at any miser: he will be suffering from constipation. Miserliness is a +sort of spiritual constipation. So go on hoarding, don’t leave anything. + +Those who are against sex without knowing what they are doing are misers. + +They go on taking in food, but they will not release the sex energy. Then they will go +mad. There is no need to release it only from the sex center. There is another possibility +— to release it from SAHASRAR, the highest center at the top of the head. That is what +tantra teaches. But it must be released, you cannot hoard it. Nothing can be hoarded in +the world. The world is a movement, it is a river. Take in and give out. If you take in and +never give out, you will become mad. + +That is what is happening: everyone is taking and no one is giving. You become afraid +when a moment of giving comes. You want just to take — even with love. You want that +someone should love you. The basic need is that you should love someone, then you will +be released. If someone loves you that will not help, because then you are taking in again. +Both of these poles must be balanced; then health happens. And that is what I call a +nonnal being. A normal being is one whose taking in and giving out is parallel, balanced. +He is normal. + + + +I call that man abnormal whose taking in is too much and whose giving out is +unbalanced. He is not giving out at all. Even if he gives sometimes, it has to be forced. It +is not his own. You can snatch something from him, you can force him to give, but he +will not give. His giving out is just like an enema, it is not natural. You can force, so he +will defecate. + +But HE is not defecating, he is not ready. It is abnormal to just go on hoarding +everything. Then he will go mad, because the whole system is disturbed. This is +abnormal, and supernormal is the one who gives and never takes in. + +These are three things — the abnormal one who takes in and never gives out, the normal +one whose give and take are balanced, and the supernormal who never takes in and only +gives. A buddha is a giver; a madman is a taker. He is at the opposite pole of a buddha. If +both poles are balanced, you are a normal man. At least be normal, because if you cannot +be normal you will fall down and you will become abnormal. + +That is why DANA — giving — is so much emphasized in all religions. Give! Whatsoever +it is, give, and don’t think in terms of taking. Then you will become supernormal. But that +is a very far-off thing. First be normal, be balanced. Whatsoever you take in, give it back +to the world. You just be the passage. Don’t hoard. Then you will never become mad, you +will never be neurotic, schizophrenic, psychotic or whatsoever you may call it. + +My definition of a normal man is one who is balanced — absolutely balanced. Nothing is +retained. He takes the breath in and then he allows it to move out. The incoming breath +and the outgoing breath are just the same — balanced. Try to be balanced, and always +remember that you must give back that which you have received. + +You will be alive, healthy, silent, peaceful, happy. A deep rhythm will happen to you, +and this rhythm happens through a balance of give and take. + +But we go on thinking in terms of taking in more and more. Whatsoever you take in +without giving it out again will create disturbance, tension, suffering. You will become a +hell. Before you take something in, always think to release something out. Have you +observed that you always emphasize the breath that goes in? You never emphasize the +breath that goes out. You take the breath in, and then the body throws the breath out. +Reverse it: you will be more normal. Emphasize the outgoing breath. Throw the breath +out as much as you can, and let the body take in. + +When you take in and you have not released, your lungs become filled with carbon +dioxide. Then you go on taking in, and you never release the entire lungs. You go on +forcing the carbon dioxide inwards. Then your breathing becomes shallow, and the entire +lungs are filled with carbon dioxide. First throw it out, and forget about taking in. The +body will take care of that itself. The body has its own wisdom, and it is more wise than +you. Throw the breath out and forget taking in. Don’t be afraid, you are not going to die. +The body will take in, and it will take in as much as is needed. As much as you have +thrown out it will take in, and the balance will be there. If you take in, then you will +disturb the balance because the hoarding mind is there. + + +I have stayed in many, many houses and I see that people have collected so many things +that they cannot live, there is no space to live — and they go on hoarding. They go on +hoarding, and they think that someday the things will be needed. Whatsoever is not +needed, don’t hoard it. And if something is needed more by someone else than you, it is + + + +better to give it. Be a giver, and you will never be pathological. All the old civilizations +were based on DANA — on giving, and this modern civilization is based on hoarding. +That is why more people are going abnonnal, neurotic. Everyone is asking from where to +get, and no one is asking where to go and give, to whom to give. + +The last question: + +Question 3 + +"DAILY IN EACH OF YOUR TALKS, YOU SPEAK OF AWARENESS - TOTAL +AWARENESS, UNINTERRUPTED AWARENESS, ETCETERA. YOU ALSO SAID +THAT IT CANNOT BE ACHIEVED BY THE MIND, BY REPEATING A THOUGHT +- THAT IT IS TO BE FELT. BUT HOW CAN ONE FEEL UNLESS ONE ACHIEVES +IT? WHAT IS THAT FEELING WHICH IS THE PRECURSOR OF ACHIEVEMENT? +HOW TO IMAGINE OR PROJECT THAT WHICH HAS NOT YET HAPPENED? +DOES THAT TOO HAPPEN BY EXCLUDING MIND? WHAT IS THE WHOLE +PROCESS? HOW CAN IT BE MADE FEASIBLE?" + +When I say that awareness cannot be attained by mind, I mean that you cannot attain it by +thinking about it. You can go on thinking about and about, but you will be moving in a +circle. + +When I say that it cannot be attained by the mind, I mean that it cannot be attained by +thinking. You have to practice it, you have to DO it. It can be attained only by doing, not +by thinking; that is the first thing. So don't go on thinking about what awareness is, how +to achieve it or what will be the result. Don’t go on thinking; start doing it. + +When walking on the street, walk with awareness. It is difficult and you go on forgetting, +but don’t be afraid. Whenever you remember again, be alert. Take every step with full +alertness, knowingly, remaining with the step, not allowing the mind to move somewhere +else. While eating, eat; chew with awareness. Whatsoever you are doing, don’t do it +mechanically — and that is different. And when I say that it can be felt only, the meaning +is this: for example, I can raise my hand mechanically, but then I can also raise my hand +with full alertness. My mind is conscious that my hand is being raised. Do it, try it — +once mechanically and then with alertness. You will feel the change. The quality changes +immediately. + +Walk with alertness, and you walk differently; a different grace comes to your walking. +You move more slowly, more beautifully. If you walk mechanically — only because you +know how to walk and there is no need to be alert, then the walking is ugly, there is no +grace in it. Do whatsoever you are doing with alertness, and feel the difference. + +When I say "feel," I mean observe. First do it mechanically and then with awareness, and +feel the difference. And you will be able to feel the difference. + +For example, if you eat with awareness, then you cannot eat more than is needed by the +body. People go on coming to me and they say, "Put us on a diet. My weight is constantly +increasing, the body is constantly hoarding. Put us on a diet." + +I tell them, "Don’t think of diet, think of consciousness. By dieting nothing will happen. +You cannot do it. You will do it one day and the next day it will go. You cannot continue +it. Rather, eat with awareness." + +The quality changes. If you eat with awareness, you will chew more. With unconscious, +mechanical habits, you simply go on pushing things into your stomach. You are not + + + +chewing at all, you are just stuffing. Then there is no pleasure, and because there is no +pleasure you need more food in order to get the pleasure. There is no taste, so you need +more food. + +Just be alert and see what happens. If you are alert, you will chew more, you will feel the +taste more, you will feel the pleasure of eating, and much more time will be taken. If you +take half an hour to eat your meal, then by taking the same quantity of a meal with full +awareness you will need one and a half hours — thrice the time. In half an hour you will +have eaten only one-third of the quantity, and you will feel more fulfilled; you will have +enjoyed the meal more. + +And when the body enjoys, it tells you when to stop. When the body has not enjoyed at +all, it never says when to stop, so you go on. Then the body becomes dull. You never +hear what the body is saying. + +You are eating without being there; that creates the problem. Be there, and every process +will be slowed down. The body will itself say, "No more!" And when the body says it, +that is the right moment. If you are aware, you cannot trespass the body's order. You will +stop. So allow your body to say something. The body is saying things every moment, but +you are not there to hear it. Be alert and you will hear it. + +And when I say, "feel it," I know it is difficult. How can you feel awareness without +being aware? I am not saying that you can feel Buddha's enlightenment right now, but +one has to start somewhere. You may not get the whole ocean, but a drop — just a drop — +will give you the taste, and the taste is the same. If even for a single moment you become +aware, you have tasted buddhahood. It is momentary, a glimpse of it, but now you know +more. And this will never happen to you through thinking; it will happen only through +feeling. + +The emphasis is on feeling because the emphasis is on a "lived" experience. Thinking is +false, you can go on thinking about love and creating theories. You can even get a +doctorate on the thesis of love, on what love is, and without ever being in love. + +You may not know what love is; you may have never felt it. You can grow in knowledge +without in any way growing in being. And these are two different dimensions. You can +go on growing in knowledge. Your head will go on growing bigger and bigger, but you +will remain the same tiny self. + +Then nothing is growing really — only accumulation. When you start feeling things, you +grow, your being grows. And one has to start somewhere, so start! There will be errors, +there are bound to be. You will go on forgetting, it is natural. But don’t get frustrated, +don’t throw the effort away saying, "I cannot do it." You CAN do it! The same possibility +exists in you that existed in Jesus or Buddha. You are the seed; you are not lacking +anything at all. You are just an arrangement, you are just a chaotic whole; everything is +there. You can become a buddha, but a reorganization of your qualities is needed. + +Right now you are chaotic because there is no arrangement. The arrangement comes in +when you start being aware. Just by your being aware things start falling in line, and this +chaos that you are becomes a symphony. + + +THE END. + + + +Chapter 49: Conscious doing + + +IN SUMMER WHEN YOU SEE THE ENTIRE SKY +ENDLESSLY CLEAR ENTER SUCH CLARITY. + +SHAKTI, + +SEE ALL SPACE AS IF ALREADY ABSORBED IN YOUR OWN HEAD +IN THE BRILLIANCE. + +WAKING, SLEEPING, DREAMING, KNOW YOU AS LIGHT. + +AS I LOOK IN YOUR EYES I never see you there — as if you are absent. You exist +absently, and this is the core of all suffering. You can be alive without being at all +present, and if you are not present your existence will become a boredom. And this is +what has happened. So when I look in your eyes I don’t find you there. You have yet to +come, you have yet to be. The situation is there, and the possibility is there — you can be +there any moment — but yet you are not. + +To become aware of this absence is to begin the journey towards meditation, towards +transcendent. If you are aware that somehow you are missing... you exist but you don't +know why, you don’t know how, you don’t know even who exists within you. This +unawareness creates all suffering, because, unknowingly, whatsoever you do will bring +suffering. It is not what you do that is basic; it is whether you do it with your presence or +with your absence that is significant. + +Whatsoever you do, if you can do it with your total presence, your life will become +ecstatic; it will be a bliss. If you do something without your presence there, absently, +your life will be a suffering — bound to be. + +Hell means your absence. + +So there are two types of seekers: one type of seeker is always in search of what to do. +That seeker is on a wrong path, because the question is not of doing at all. The question is +of being — what to be, how to be. So never think in terms of action and doing, because +whatsoever you do, if you are absent it will be meaningless. + +Whether you move in the world or you live in a monastery; whether you function in the +crowd or you move to an isolated spot in the Himalayas will make no difference. You +will be absent here and you will be absent there, and whatsoever you do — in the crowd +or in the isolation — will bring suffering. If you are not there, then whatsoever you do is +wrong. + +The second type, and the right type of seeker, is not in search of what to do, he is in +search of how to be. The first thing is how to be. + +One man came to Gautam Buddha. He was filled with much compassion, with much +sympathy, and he asked Gautam Buddha, 'What can I do to help the world?’ + +Buddha is reported to have laughed and said to the man, 'You cannot do anything +because you are not. How can you do anything when you are not? So don’t think of the +world. Don’t think of how to serve the world, how to help others.’ Buddha said, 'First be +— and if you are, then whatsoever you do becomes a service, it becomes a prayer, it +becomes compassion. + +Your presence is the turning point. Your being is the revolution.’ + +So these are the two paths: the path of action and the path of meditation. They are + + + +diametrically opposite. The path of action is basically concerned with you as a doer. It +will try to change your actions; it will try to change your character, your morals, your +relationships, but never you. The path of meditation is diametrically opposite. It is not +concerned with your actions; it is directly and immediately concerned with you. What +you do is irrelevant. What you are is relevant. And that is basic and primary, because all +action springs from you. + +Remember, your actions can be changed and modified, can even be replaced by +diametrically opposite actions, but they are not going to change you. Any outward +change will not bring the inner revolution, because the outward is superficial and the +innennost core remains untouched; by what you do it remains untouched. But the vice +versa brings the revolution: if the innermost core is different, the surface automatically +changes. So think a basic question; only then can we enter these techniques of +meditation. + +Don’t be concerned with what you are doing. That may be a trick, that maya be a device +to escape from the real problem. For example, you are violent. You can make every effort +to be non-violent, thinking that by being non-violent you will become religious; by +becoming non-violent you will come closer to the divine. + +You are cruel, and you may make every effort to be compassionate. + +You can do it, and nothing will change and you will remain the same. Your cruelty will +become a part of your compassion — and that is more dangerous. Your violence will +become a part of your non-violence — that is more subtle. You will be violently non-v +iolent. Your non-violence will have all the madness of violence, and through your +compassion you will be cruel. + +You can even kill through your compassion; people have killed. There are so many +religious wars — they are fought in the mood of compassion. You can kill very +compassionately, very non-violently; lovingly you can kill and murder, because you are +killing for the sake of the person you are killing. You are killing him for himself, for his +own sake, to help him. + +You can change your actions, and this effort to change the actions may be just a device to +escape the basic change. The basic change is this — first you must be. You must become +more alert, more conscious of your being, only then a presence comes to you. + +You never feel yourself, and even sometimes when you feel, you feel through others — +through excitement, through stimulation, through reaction. Someone else is needed, and +via someone else you can feel yourself. This is absurd. Alone, without excitement, with +no one there to become a mirror, you fall in sleep, you get bored. + +You never feel yourself. There is no presence. You live absently. + +This absent existence is the non-religious mind. To become filled with your own +presence, with the light of your own being, is to become religious. So remember this as a +basic point: that my concern is not with your actions. What you do is irrelevant. What +you are — absent, present, aware, unaware — that's my concern. And these techniques we +will enter are techniques to make you more present, to bring you here and now. + +Either someone else is needed for you to feel yourself, or the past is needed — through the +past, through past memories, you can feel your identity. Or the future is needed — you +can project in your dreams. You can project your ideals, future lives, moksha. Either you +need past memories to feel that you are, or you need a future projection, or someone else, +but you alone are never enough. This is the disease, and unless you alone become + + + +enough, nothing will be enough for you. And once you alone have become enough unto +yourself, you have become victorious, the struggle is over. Now there will be no suffering +any more. A point of no return has come. + +Beyond this point there is beatitude, eternal bliss. Before this point you are bound to +suffer, but the whole suffering, strangely, is your own doing. It is a miracle that you +create your own suffering. No one else is creating it. + +If someone else is creating it then it is difficult to go beyond it. If the world is creating it +then what can you do? But because you can do, it means no one else is creating your +suffering — it is your own nightmare. And these are the basic elements of it. + +The first thing: you go on thinking that you are, you believe that you are. This is simply a +belief. You have never encountered yourself, you have never come face to face with +yourself; you have never met yourself, there has been no meeting. You simply believe +that you are. Throw this belief totally. Know well that you are yet to be, that you are not, +because with this false belief you will never be able to transfonn. On this false belief +your whole life will become false. + +Gurdjieff used to say to his disciples, 'Don't ask me what to do. You cannot do anything, +because to do something first you will be needed. And you are not there, so who will do +it? You can think about doing, but you cannot do anything.’ + +These techniques are to help you, to bring you back; to help you to create a situation in +which you can meet yourself. Much will have to be destroyed — all that is wrong, all that +is false. Before the real arises the false will have to leave; it must cease. And these are the +false notions — that you are. These are the false notions — that you are a soul, atma, you +are Brahma. Not that you are not, but these notions are false. + + +Gurdjieff had to insist that there is no soul in you. Against all the traditions he insisted, +'Man has no soul. Soul is simply a possibility — it can be, it may not be. It has to be +achieved. You are simply a seed.’ + +And this emphasis is good. The possibility is there, the potentiality is there, but it is not +yet actual. And we go on reading the Gita and the Upanishads and the Bible, and we go +on feeling that we are the soul — the seed thinking that it is the tree. The tree is hidden +there, but it is yet to be uncovered. And it is good to remember that you may remain a +seed, and you may die a seed — because the tree cannot come, the tree cannot sprout by +itself. You have to do something consciously about it, because only through +consciousness it grows. + +There are two types of growth. One is unconscious, natural growth: if the situation is +there, the thing will grow. But the soul, the atma, the innermost being, the divine within +you, is a different type of growth altogether. It is only through consciousness that it +grows. It is not natural, it is supernatural. + +Left to nature itself it will not grow; just left to evolution it will never evolve. You have +to do something consciously, you have to make a conscious effort about it, because only +through consciousness it grows. Once the consciousness is focused there, the growth +happens. These techniques are to make you more conscious. + + +Now we will enter the techniques. + + + +The first technique: + + +IN SUMMER WHEN YOU SEE +THE ENTIRE SKY +ENDLESSLY CLEAR, + +ENTER SUCH CLARITY. + +IN SUMMER WHEN YOU SEE THE ENTIRE SKY ENDLESSLY CLEAR, ENTER +SUCH CLARITY. + +Mind is confusion; there is no clarity. And mind is always crowded, always cloudy; never +the open sky, cloudless, empty. Mind cannot be that. You cannot make your mind clear; +it is not the nature of the mind to be so. Mind will remain unclear. If you can leave the +mind behind, if you can suddenly transcend the mind and come out of it, clarity will +happen to you. You can be clear, but not the mind. There is not such a thing as a clear +mind; never has been and never will be. Mind means the unclarity, the confusion. + +Try to understand the structure of the mind, and then this technique will be clear to you. +What is mind? A continuous process of thought, a continuous procession of thoughts — +associated, non-associated, relevant, irrelevant — many multi-dimensional impressions +gathered from everywhere. The whole life is a gathering, a gathering of the dust. And this +goes on and on. + +A child is bom. A child is clear because the mind is not there. The moment mind appears, +the unclarity, the confusion enters. A child is clear, a clarity, but he will have to gather +knowledge, information, culture, religion, conditionings — necessary, useful. + +He will have to gather many things from everywhere, from many sources — opposite, +contradictory sources. From thousands and thousands of sources he will gather. Then the +mind will become a market-place, a crowd, and because of so many sources, confusion is +bound to be there. And whatsoever you gather, nothing is certain, because knowledge is +always a growing affair. + +I remember, someone related an anecdote to me. He was a great searcher, and he told me +this about his professor who taught him for five years in a medical college. The professor +was a great scholar of his subject. The last thing he did was to gather his students and tell +them, ' One thing more I have to teach you. Whatsoever I have taught you is only fifty +percent correct, and the remaining fifty percent is absolutely wrong. But the trouble, is, I +don’t know which fifty percent is correct and which fifty percent is incorrect — I don’t +know.’ + +The whole edifice of knowledge is such. Nothing is certain, no one knows, everyone is +groping. Through groping we create systems, and there are thousands and thousands of +systems. Hindus say something, Christians say something else, Mohammedans still +something else — all contradictory, all contradicting each other; no agreement, no +certainty — and all these sources are the sources for your mind. You collect: your mind +becomes a junk-yard; confusion is bound to be there. + +Only a person who doesn’t know much can be certain. The more you know, the more +uncertain you will become. + +People, primitive people, were more certain and apparently appeared to be more clear. +There was no clarity — simply unawareness of facts which could contradict them. If the +modern mind is more confused, the reason is that the modern knows more. If you know + + + +more you will be more confused, because now you have more knowledge, and the more +you know, the more uncertain you become. Only idiots can be certain, only idiots can be +dogmatic, only idiots will never hesitate. The more you know, the more the earth is taken +away from your feet, the more hesitant you become. What I mean to say is, the more the +mind grows, the more you will know the nature of the mind is confusion. + +When I say only idiots can be certain, I don’t mean that a Buddha is an idiot — because he +is not uncertain. Remember the difference. He is not certain, he is not uncertain — he is +simply clear. With the mind, uncertainty; with the idiotic mind, certainty. With no mind +both disappear — certainty and uncertainty. + +Buddha is a clarity, a space, open space. He is not certain — there is nothing to be certain. +He is not uncertain, because there is nothing to be uncertain. Only one who is seeking +certainty can be uncertain. Mind is always uncertain and always seeking certainty; +always confused and always seeking clarity. + +A Buddha is one who has dropped the mind; and with the mind all confusion, all +certainty, all uncertainty, everything is dropped. + +Look at it in this way: your consciousness is just like the sky and your mind is just like +the clouds. The sky remains untouched by the clouds. They come and go; no scar is left +behind. The sky remains virgin: no record, no footprints, nothing of the clouds, no +memory. They come and they go; the sky remains undisturbed. This is the case within +you also: the consciousness remains undisturbed. Thoughts come and go, minds evolve +and disappear. And don’t think that you have one mind; you have many minds, it is a +crowd. Your minds go on changing. + +You are a communist, so you have a certain type of mind. You can leave it and you can +become anti-communist. Then you have a different mind; not only different, quite the +opposite. You can go on changing your minds just like your dress. And you go on +changing. You may not be aware of it — these clouds come and go. Clarity can be +achieved if you become aware of the sky; if your focus changes. You are focused on the +clouds if you are unfocused on the sky. Unfocus on the clouds and focus on the sky. + +This technique says: + +IN SUMMER WHEN YOU SEE +THE ENTIRE SKY +ENDLESSLY CLEAR, + +ENTER SUCH CLARITY. + +Meditate on the sky; a summer sky with no clouds, endlessly empty and clear, nothing +moving in it, in its total virginity. + +Contemplate on it, meditate on it, and enter this clarity. Become this clarity, this space- +like clarity. + +If you meditate on open unclouded sky, suddenly you will feel that the mind is +disappearing, the mind is dropping away. There will be gaps. Suddenly you will become +aware that it is as if the clear sky has entered in you also. There will be intervals. For a +time being, thoughts will cease — as if the traffic has ceased and there is no one moving. +In the beginning it will be only for moments, but even those moments are transfonning. +By and by the mind will slow down, bigger gaps will appear. For minutes together there + + + +will be no thought, no cloud. And when there IS no thought, no cloud, the outer sky and +the inner become one, because only the thought is the barrier, only the thought creates the +wall; only because of the thought the outer is outer and the inner is inner. When the +thought is not there, the outer and the inner lose their boundaries, they become one. +Really, boundaries never existed there. They appeared only because of the thought, the +barrier. + +To meditate on the sky is beautiful. Just lie down so you forget the earth; just lie down on +your back on any lonely beach, on any ground, and just look at the sky. But a clear sky +will be helpful — unclouded, endless. And just looking, staring at the sky, feel the clarity +of it — the uncloudedness, the boundless expanse — and then enter that clarity, become +one with it. + +Feel as if you have become the sky, the space. + +In the beginning, if you only meditate on the open sky, not doing anything else, intervals +will start appearing, because whatsoever you see enters you. Whatsoever you see stirs +you within; whatsoever you see is pictured, reflected. + +You see a building. You cannot simply see it; something immediately starts happening +within you. You see a man, a woman; you see a car — you see anything. It is not just +outside, something has started within, the reflection, and you have started reacting to it. + +So everything you see moulds you, makes you, modifies you, creates you. The without is +constantly related with the within. + +To look into the open sky is good. Just the expanse is beautiful, with no boundaries there. +Your own boundaries will disappear, because the no-boundary sky will reflect within +you. And if you can stare without blinking your eyes it will be good. If you stare without +blinking your eyes... because if you blink your eyes your thought-process will continue. +Stare without blinking the eyes. Stare in the emptiness, move into that emptiness, feel +that you have become one with it, and any moment the sky will enter within you. + +First you enter into the sky and then the sky enters you. And there is a meeting: the inner +sky meeting the outer sky. In that meeting is realization. In that meeting there is no mind, +because the meeting can happen only when the mind is not there. + +In that meeting you are for the first time not your mind. There is no confusion. Confusion +cannot exist without the mind. There is no misery, because misery also cannot exist +without the mind. + +Have you observed this fact anytime or not — that misery cannot exist without your +mind? You cannot be miserable without your mind. The very source is not there. Who +will supply you with this misery? Who will make you miserable? And the same is true +from the opposite direction also: you cannot be miserable without your mind and you +cannot be blissful with your mind. The mind can never be the source of bliss. + +So if the inner and outer sky meet and mind disappears, even for a moment, you will be +filled with a new life. The quality of that life is absolutely different. It is life eternal, +uncontaminated by death, uncontaminated by any fear. In that meeting you will be here +and now, in the present — because past belongs to thoughts, future belongs to thoughts. +Past and future are part of your mind. Present is existence — it is not part of your mind. +This moment doesn’t belong to your mind. The moment that has gone belongs; the +moment that has to come belongs to your mind. This moment never belongs to you. +Rather, you belong to this moment. You exist here, right now here. Your mind exists +somewhere else, always somewhere else. + + + +Unload yourself. + +I was reading one Sufi mystic. + + +He was travelling on a lonely path, the way was deserted, and he saw a fanner with his +bullock-cart. The cart was stuck in mud. The road was rough. The farmer was carrying a +big load of apples in his bullock-cart, but somewhere on the rough road the tailboard of +the wagon became unfastened and the apples were scattered. But he was not aware of it; +the farmer was not aware of it. + +When the cart got stuck in the mud, first he tried to bring it out somehow, but all efforts +were in vain, so he thought, 'Now I must unload my cart, then maybe I can pull it out.’ He +looked back. Hardly a dozen apples were left — the load was already unloaded. You can +feel his misery. The Sufi reports in his memoirs that that exasperated fanner made a +remark. He said, 'Stuck, by heck! Stuck! — and not a damn thing to unload!’ The only +possibility was that if he could unload the cart it could come out; but now — nothing to +unload! + +Fortunately you are not stuck in such a way. You can unload — your cart is too much +loaded. You can unload the mind, and the moment the mind is not there, you fly; you +become capable of flying. + +This technique — to look into the clarity of the sky and to become one with it — is one of +the most practised. Many traditions have used this. And particularly for the modern mind +it will be very useful, because on earth nothing is left. On earth nothing is left to meditate +on — only the sky. + +If you look all around, everything is man-made, everything is limited, with a boundary, a +limitation. Only the sky is still, fortunately, open to meditate on. + +Try this technique, it will be helpful, but remember three things. One: don’t blink — stare. +Even if your eyes start to feel pain and tears come down, don��t be worried. Even those +tears will be a part of unloading; they will be helpful. Those tears will make your eyes +more innocent and fresh — bathed. You just go on staring. + +The second point: don’t think about the sky, remember. You can start thinking about the +sky. You can remember many poems, beautiful poems about the sky — then you will miss +the point. You are not to think 'about' it — you are to enter it, you are to be one with it — +because if you start thinking about it, again a barrier is created. You are missing the sky +again, and you are again enclosed in your own mind. Don’t think about the sky. Be the +sky. Just stare and move into the sky, and allow the sky to move in you. If you move into +the sky, the sky will move into you immediately. + +How can you do it? How will you do it — this moving into the sky? Just go on staring +further away and further away. Go on staring — as if you are trying to find the boundary. +Move deep. Move as much as you can. That very movement will break the barrier. And +this method should be practised for at least forty minutes; less than that will not do, will +not be of much help. + + +When you really feel that you have become one, then you can close the eyes. When the +sky has entered in you, you can close the eyes. You will be able to see it within also. +Then there is no need. So only after forty minutes, when you feel that the oneness has +happened and there is a communion and you have become part of it and the mind is no + + + +more, close the eyes and remain in the sky within. + +The clarity will help the third point: ENTER SUCH CLARITY. The clarity will help — +the uncontaminated, unclouded sky. Just be aware of the clarity that is all around you. +Don't think about it; just be aware of the clarity, the purity, the innocence. These words +are not to be repeated. You have to feel them rather than think. And once you stare into +the sky the feeling will come, because it is not on your part to imagine these things — +they are there. If you stare they will start happening to you. + +The sky is pure, the purest thing in existence. Nothing makes it impure. Worlds come and +go, earths are there and then disappear, and the sky remains pure. The purity is there. You +need not project it; you are simply to feel it — to be vulnerable to it so you can feel it — +and the clarity is there. Allow the sky to happen to you. You cannot force it; you can only +allow it to happen. + +All meditations are really allowing something to happen. Never think in terms of +aggression, never think in tenns of forcing something. + +You cannot force anything. Really, because you have been trying to force, you have +created all misery. Nothing can be forced, but you can allow things to happen. Be +feminine. Allow things to happen. Be passive. The sky is absolutely passive: not doing +anything at all, just remaining there. Just be passive and remain under the sky — +vulnerable, open, feminine, with no aggression on your part — and then the sky will +penetrate you. + +IN SUMMER WHEN YOU SEE +THE ENTIRE SKY +ENDLESSLY CLEAR, + +ENTER SUCH CLARITY. + +But if it is not summer what will you do? If the sky is clouded, not clear, then close your +eyes and just enter the inner sky. Just close your eyes, and if you see some thoughts, just +see them as if they are floating clouds in the sky. Be aware of the background, the sky, +and be indifferent to thoughts. + +We are too much concerned with thoughts and never aware of the gaps. One thought +passes, and before another enters there is a gap — in that gap the sky is there. Then, +whenever there is no thought, what is there? The emptiness is there. So if the sky is +clouded — it is not summer-time and the sky is not clear — close your eyes, focus your +mind on the background, the inner sky in which thoughts come and go. Don’t pay much +attention to thoughts; pay attention to the space in which they move. + +For example, we are sitting in this room. + +I can look at this room in two ways. Either I can look at you, so that I am indifferent to +the space you are in, the roominess, the room you are in — I look at you, I focus my mind +on you who are here, and not on the room in which you are — or, I can change my focus: + +I can look into the room, and I become indifferent to you. You are there, but my +emphasis, my focus, is on the room. Then the total perspective changes. + +Just do this in the inner world. Look at the space. Thoughts are moving in it: be +indifferent to them, don’t pay any attention to them. They are there; note it down that they +are there, moving. The traffic is moving in the street. Look at the street and be indifferent +to the traffic. Don't look to see who is passing; just know that something is passing and + + + +be aware of the space in which it is passing. Then the summer sky happens within. + +There is no need to wait for the summer, because our minds are such that they can find +any excuse. They will say, 'Summer is not here, and even if it is summer, the sky is not +clear.’ + +The second technique: + +SHAKTI, + +SEE ALL SPACE AS IF + +ALREADY ABSORBED IN YOUR OWN HEAD +IN THE BRILLIANCE. + +SEE ALL SPACE AS IF ALREADY ABSORBED IN YOUR OWN HEAD IN THE +BRILLIANCE. Close your eyes for this technique. When you do it, close your eyes and +feel as if the whole space is absorbed in your own head. + +It will be difficult in the beginning. It is one of the advanced techniques, so it will be +good to proceed towards it in steps. Do one thing. If you want to do this technique, start +in steps. + +First: while going to sleep, when just ready to sleep, lie down on your bed, close your +eyes and feel where your feet are. If you are six feet tall, or five feet tall, just feel where +your feet are, the demarcation. Then just imagine one thing: you have become six inches +longer. Your height has lengthened, it has become six inches more. Just with closed eyes +feel this. In imagination, feel that your height has become six inches more. + +Then the second step: feel your head, where it is, just inside, and then feel that your head +has also become six inches longer. When you can feel this, everything will be easy. Then +you make it more. You feel that you have become twelve feet all; or, that you have filled +the whole room. Now in your imagination you are touching the walls — you have filled +the whole room. Then, by steps, feel that the whole house has come within you. And +once you know the feel, it is very easy. If you can grow six inches taller, everything is +easy then. If you can feel that you are not five foot, but you are five foot six, then nothing +is difficult; this technique will be easy. + +For three days go on feeling that; then for three days more, feel that you have filled the +whole room. + +It is just a training of imagination. Then for three days the whole house is within you; +then for three days you have become the sky. Then this technique will be very easy. + +SHAKTI, + +SEE ALL SPACE AS IF + +ALREADY ABSORBED IN YOUR OWN HEAD +IN THE BRILLIANCE. + +Then you can close your eyes and feel that the whole sky, the whole space, is absorbed +by your head. The moment you can feel this, the mind disappears, because the mind +needs a very narrow space. With such vastness the mind cannot exist; it simply +disappears. In such vastness mind is impossible. Mind can only be narrow, limited. In +such infinite space there is no place for the mind to exist. + + + +This technique is good. Suddenly the mind explodes and the space is there. Within a +three month period you can feel this. Your whole life will be different. But grow towards +it in steps, because sometimes through this technique people become crazy, they lose +balance. It is so tremendous, the impact is so tremendous — suddenly if you become +aware that your head has absorbed the whole space, and then you see stars and moons +moving within you, the whole universe, you may become dizzy. In many traditions this +technique is used very cautiously. + +One of the Indian mystics of this century, Ramteerth, used this technique, and many +suspect, many of those who know suspect that because of this technique he committed +suicide. + +For him it was not a suicide, because for him — one who has known that the whole space +has come within him — suicide is impossible, it cannot happen. No one is there to commit +suicide. But for others, for those who were watching from outside, it was a suicide. + +He started feeling that the whole universe was moving within him, within his head. His +disciples thought that he was talking poetry. Then they started feeling that he had gone +mad, because he started claiming that he was the universe and everything was within +him. And then one day he just jumped from a mountain cliff into a river. Before jumping +he wrote a beautiful poem saying, 'I have become the universe. Now I feel this body as a +burden, unnecessary, so I give it back. Now no boundary is needed. I have become the +unbounded Brahma.’ + +Someone with a psychiatric training will think that he has gone mad, it is just neurosis, +but one who knows deeper dimensions of human consciousness will say he has become a +mukta, an enlightened one. But to the ordinary mind it is a suicide. + +With such techniques there is danger. That’s why I say grow towards them gradually, +because you don’t know — anything is possible. Sometimes you are not aware of your +own potentiality, sometimes you don’t know how ready you are, and something can +happen. So do it in steps. + +First try your imagination with small things: just that the body has become bigger or has +become smaller. + +You can go both the ways. You are five feet six: feel you have become four feet, three +feet, two feet, one foot; you have become just a seed. This is just a training; just a +training so that you can feel whatsoever you want to feel. Your inner mind is absolutely +free to feel; nothing can hinder it from feeling anything. It is your feeling. You can grow +and you can be small. Suddenly you become aware that it is you. + +And if you can work well through this, you can come out of your body very easily. If you +can grow and become small through imagination, you are capable of coming out of your +body. You simply imagine that you are standing outside of your body and you will stand +— but not immediately. + +First work with small steps, and then when you feel that you are at ease and you don’t +become scared, then feel that you have filled the whole room — actually you will feel the +touch of the walls. And then feel that the whole house has come within you — you will +feel it within you. And then go on. Then, by and by, let the sky be felt in the head. And +once you feel the sky in your head, absorbed there, the mind simply disappears. It has no +business to do there. + +For this technique it is good to be with someone: to be with a teacher, or to be with a +friend. Don’t do it alone. Someone must be there to take care of you, to watch you. This is + + + +a school method. Where many people are working in a school, it is very easy, less +harmful, less dangerous — because sometimes when the sky explodes within, for many +days you may not become aware of your body. + +You may not come out, you may be so absorbed in the feeling, because time disappears; +you cannot feel how much time has elapsed. The body disappears, you cannot feel the +body. You become the sky. Someone must take care of your body; very loving care will +be needed. + +So with a master, or with a group, this technique is less harmful and less dangerous. And +with a group that knows what is possible — what can happen and what should be done... +because if in such a state of mind you are suddenly awakened, you may go mad, because +time will be needed for your mind to come back. If suddenly brought back to the body, +your nervous system cannot bear it. It is not made for that. It has to be trained. So don't +do it alone. You can do it in a group, with a few friends, in a lonely place. And do it in +steps, not suddenly. + +The third technique: + +WAKING, + +SLEEPING, + +DREAMING, + +KNOW YOU AS LIGHT. + +WAKING, SLEEPING, DREAMING, KNOW YOU AS LIGHT. First start with waking. +Yoga and Tantra divide the life of man’s mind into three divisions — the life of the mind, +remember. They divide mind into three divisions: waking, sleeping, dreaming. These are +not the divisions of your consciousness, these are the divisions of your mind, and the +consciousness is the fourth. + +They have not given any name to it in the east; they call it simply the fourth, turiya. + +These three have names. These are the clouds, they can be named — a waking cloud, a +sleeping cloud, a dreaming cloud. They are all clouds, and the space in which they move +— the sky — in unnamed, left simply as the fourth. + +Western psychology has only recently become aware of the dreaming dimension. Really, +only with Freud, dreaming became important. But with Hindus, this is one of the most +ancient concepts: that you cannot really know a man unless you know what he is doing in +his dreams. Because whatsoever he is doing in his waking hours is more or less bound to +be acting, false, because in the waking state of his mind he is forced to do many things. +He is not free. The society is there, rules are there, moralities are there. He is constantly +struggling with his own desires: suppressing them, modifying them, moulding them in +the mould the society allows. And the society never allows you to be your total being; it +chooses. That is what a culture means — culture means a choice. + +Every culture is a conditioning: a choice of certain things and a denial of certain things. +Your total being is not accepted anywhere; it is not — nowhere. Certain aspects are +accepted here, certain aspects are accepted there, in this country or that, but nowhere is +the total human being accepted. So the waking consciousness is bound to be false, +pseudo, artificial, forced. You are not real there — just actors; not spontaneous — +manipulated. + + + +ONly in dreams are you free; only in dreams are you authentically yourself. + +You can do whatsoever you like in your dreams. No one is concerned; you are alone. No +one can penetrate, no one can look into your dreams. And no one is bothered: what you +do in your dreams is your business, no one is concerned. They are absolutely private. +Because they are absolutely private and related to no one, you can be free. So unless your +dreams are known, your real face cannot be known. Hindus have been aware of it: +dreams must be penetrated. But they are still clouds — private of course, freer, but still +clouds, and one has to go beyond them also. + +These are the three states: waking and sleeping and dreaming. Dreaming became very +primary with Freud. Now sleeping has been touched. Now many sleep labs are working +in the west to know what sleep is, because it seems to be very strange that we don’t know +what sleep is. What really happens to you in sleep is not yet known scientifically. + +And if we cannot know what sleep is, it will be difficult to know what man is, because +for one third of his life he will be sleeping. One third of your life! If you are going to live +for sixty years, for twenty years you will be sleeping. It is such a major part. What are +you doing while you are asleep? Something mysterious is going on, and it is so essential +that life is not possible without it. + +Something deep is happening, but you are not aware. + +Waking, you are a different person; dreaming, you are again a different person. In deep +sleep, you are again a different person. You can't remember even your name while deep +asleep. You don’t know whether you are a Mohammedan or a Christian or a Hindu. Out +of your deep sleep you can't answer who you are; rich or poor — no identity, no image. + +In the waking layer you exist with the society. In the dreaming layer you exist with your +own desires. In deep sleep you exist with nature, deep in the womb of nature. And yoga +and Tantra say that only beyond these three you exist in Brahma, in the cosmic whole. So +these three must be crossed, passed, transcended. + +There is one difference. The western psychology is now interested in studying these +states. Eastern seekers were interested in these states, but not in studying them. They +were interested only in how to transcend them. This technique is a transcendental +technique. + +WAKING, + +SLEEPING, + +DREAMING, + +KNOW YOU AS LIGHT. + +Very difficult. You have to start with waking. How can you remember in dreams? Can +you create a dream consciously? Can you manipulate a dream? Can you have your own +dreams of your own wishes? You cannot. How impotent man is! You cannot even create +a dream of your own. They too happen to you; you are helpless. + +But there are certain techniques through which dreams can be created, and those +techniques are very helpful in transcending, because if you can create, then you can +transcend. But one has to start with waking. + +While waking — moving, eating, working — remember yourself as light. As if in your +heart a flame is burning, and your body is nothing but the aura around the flame. Imagine +it. In your heart a flame is burning, and your body is nothing but a light aura around the + + + +flame; your body is just a light around the flame. Allow it to go deep within your mind +and your consciousness. Imbibe it. + +It will take time, but if you go on thinking about it, feeling it, imagining it, within a +certain period you will be able to remember it the whole day. While awake, moving on +the street, you are a flame moving. No one else will be aware of it in the beginning, but if +you continue it, after three months others will also become aware. And only when others +become aware can you then be at ease. Don't say to anyone. Simply imagine a flame, and +your body as just the aura around it. Not a physical body, but an electric body. Go on +doing it. + +If you persist, within three months, or somewhere near about then, others will become +aware that something has happened to you. They will feel a subtle light around you. + +When you come near them, they will feel a different warmth. If you touch them, they will +feel a fiery touch. + +They will become aware that something strange is happening to you. Don't say to anyone. +When others become aware, then you can feel at ease, and then you can enter the second +step, not before it. + +The second step is to take it into dreaming. Now you can take it into dreaming. It has +become a reality. Now it is not an imagination. Through imagination you have uncovered +a reality. It is real. Everything consists of light. You are light — unaware of the fact — +because every particle of matter is light. + +The scientists say it consists of electrons. It is the same thing. Light is the source of all. +You are also condensed light: through imagination you are simply uncovering a reality. +Imbibe it — and when you have become so filled with it, you can carry it into dreams, not +before. + +Then, while falling asleep, go on thinking of the flame, go on seeing it, feeling you are +the light. Remembering it... remembering... remembering... you fall down asleep. And the +remembrance continues. In the beginning you will start having some dreams in which +you will feel you have a flame within, you are light. By and by, in the dreams also you +will move with the same feeling. And once this feeling enters the dreams, dreams will +start disappearing. Dreams will start disappearing: there will be less and less dreams and +more and more deep sleep. + +When in all your dreaming this reality is revealed — that you are light, a flame, a burning +flame — all dreams will disappear. + +Only when dreams disappear can you carry this feeling into sleep, never before. Now you +are at the door. When dreams have disappeared and you remember yourself as a flame, +you are at the door of sleep. Now you can enter with the feeling. And once you enter +sleep with the feeling that you are a flame, you will be aware in it — the sleep will now +happen only to your body, not to you. + +This technique is to help you go beyond these three states. If you can be aware that you +are a flame, a light, that sleep is not happening to you, you are conscious. You are +carrying a conscious effort. Now you are crystallized around that flame. The body is +asleep, you are not. + +This is what Krishna says in Gita: that yogis never sleep. While others are asleep, they +are awake. Not that their bodies never sleep. Their bodies sleep — but only bodies. Bodies +need rest, consciousness needs no rest; because bodies are mechanisms, consciousness is +not a mechanism. Bodies need fuel, they need rest. That's why they are born, they are + + + +young, then they become old, and then they die. Consciousness is never born, never +becomes old, never dies. It needs no fuel, it needs no rest. It is pure energy, perpetual +eternal energy. + +If you can carry this image of flame and light through the doors of sleep, you will never +sleep again, only the body will rest. And while the body is sleeping, you will know it. + +Once this happens, you have become the fourth. Now the waking and the dreaming and +the sleeping are parts of the mind. They are parts, and you have become the fourth — one +who goes through all of them and is none of them. + +Really, this is so simple. If you are in the waking state, and then you move into dreams, +you cannot be either. If you are the waking state, then how can you dream? And if you +are the dreaming state, how can you fall into sleep where there is no dream? You must be +a traveller, and these states must be stations, so you can move from here and there and +come back again. Again in the morning you will move into the waking state. + +These are states, and the one who moves within these states is you. But that you is the +fourth — and that fourth is what you call the soul. That fourth is what you call divine, that +fourth is what you call the immortal element, the life eternal. + +WAKING + +SLEEPING, + +DREAMING, + +KNOW YOU AS LIGHT. + +This is a very beautiful technique. But try it first in the waking. And remember, when +others become aware, then only have you succeeded in it. They will become aware. Then +you can enter into dream, and then into sleep, and then you can awaken to that which you +are — the fourth. + + +THE END. + + + +Chapter 50: Moving to the roots + + +Question 1 + +LAST NIGHT YOU SAID THAT BY CHANGING THE OUTER, THE INNER +REMAINS UNCHANGED, UNTRANSFORMED. BUT IS IT NOT TRUE THAT THE +RIGHT FOOD, RIGHT LABOUR, RIGHT SLEEP, RIGHT ACTIONS AND +BEHAVIORS ARE ALSO IMPORTANT FACTORS FOR INNER +TRANSFORMATION? ISN’T IT A MISTAKE TO IGNORE THE OUTER +COMPLETELY? + +THE OUTER CANNOT CHANGE THE INNER, but the outer can help, or it can hinder. +The outer can create a situation in which the inner can explode more easily. The thing to +be remembered is this: that the outer transformation is not the inner. Even if you have +done everything and the situation is there, the inner is not going to explode. The situation +is necessary, it is helpful, but it is not the transformation. And those who get involved +with the outer.... + +The outer is a vast phenomenon. You can go on changing for lives and you will never be +satisfied, and something or other will remain to be changed, because unless the inner +changes, the outer can never be perfect. You can go on changing it and polishing it and +conditioning it. You will never feel satisfied. You will never come to a situation where +you can feel, 'Now, the field is ready.’ So many have wasted their lives. + +If your mind becomes obsessed with the outer — with the food, with the clothes, with the +behavior... I am not saying to neglect them. No, what I am saying is, don’t get obsessed +with them. + +They can be helpful, but they can become great hindrances if your mind becomes +obsessed. Then it becomes an escape, then you are just postponing the inner change. And +you can go on changing the outer. The inner is not even touched by it, the inner remains +the same. + +You might have heard one old Indian fable. In 'Panchtantra' it is said that a mouse was +very much afraid of a cat; constantly in fear, anxiety. He couldn’t sleep: he would dream +about the cat and he would tremble. A magician, just out of pity, transformed the mouse +into a cat. The outer was changed, but immediately the mouse within the cat now became +afraid of a dog. The anxiety was the same; only the object had changed. Previously it was +the cat, now it was the dog. The trembling continued, the anguish remained, the dreams +were still of fear. + +So the magician changed the cat into a dog. Immediately the dog became afraid of the +tiger, because the mouse within remained the same. The mouse was not changed; only +bodies, the outer. The same anxiety, the same disease, the same fear remained. The +magician changed the dog into a tiger. Immediately the mouse within the tiger became +afraid of a hunter. So the magician said to the mouse, 'Now be a mouse again, because I +can change your bodies, I cannot change you. You have the heart of a mouse, so what can +I do?’ The heart of a mouse. + +You can go on changing the outer, but the heart of the mouse remains the same. + +And that heart creates the problems. The shape will change, the fonn will change, but the +substance will remain the same. And it makes no difference whether you are afraid of a + + + +cat, or of a dog, or of a tiger. The question is not of whom you are afraid; the question is +that you are afraid. + +The emphasis is — my emphasis is — that you must remain aware that your outer effort +should not become a substitute for the inner transformation. One thing. Take every help +that can be taken. It is good to have right food, but it is nonsense and madness to become +obsessed with food. It is good to have right behavior, but it is neurotic to become +obsessed with it. You should not become mad about anything. + +In India there are many sects of sannyasins who are obsessed with food. The whole day +they are thinking only of food: what to eat and what not to eat; who should prepare the +food and who should not prepare the food. Once I was travelling with a sannyasin. He +would take only milk, and only cow's milk, and only from those cows which were white; +otherwise he would go without food. This man is mad. + +Remember this: that the inner is important, significant. The outer is helpful, it is good, +but you must not become focused with it. It must not become so important that the inner +is forgotten. The inner must remain the inner and the central, and the outer, if possible, +should be changed just as a help. + + +Don't ignore it completely. There is no need to ignore it, because really the outer is also +part of the inner. It is not something opposite to it, it is not something contrary to it, it is +not something imposed upon you — it is you. But the inner is the central, and the outer is +the periphery. So give as much importance as a periphery needs, as a circumference +needs, as a boundary needs — but the boundary is not the house. So take care of it, but +don’t become mad after it. + +Our mind is always trying to find escapes. If you can become involved with food, with +sex, with clothes, with the body, your mind will be at ease, because now you are not +going towards the inner. Now there is no need to change the mind. Now there is no need +to destroy the mind, to go beyond the mind. With the change of food, the same mind can +exist. You may eat this or that — the same mind can exist. Only when you move +inwards... the more inner you reach, the more this mind which you have has to cease. The +inward path is the path towards no-mind. + +The mind becomes afraid. It will try to find some escape — something to do with the +outer. Then the mind can exist as it is. Whatsoever you do makes no difference. It is +irrelevant what you do — this mind can exist, and this mind can find ways for how to +remain the same. And sometimes, when you struggle with the natural outlet, your mind +will find some perverted outlets which are more dangerous. + +Rather than being a help, they will become hindrances. + +I have heard that Mulla Nasrudin fell down his stairs. His leg was fractured, so it was put +in a plaster cast, and he was told that for three months he was not to go up and down the +stairs. After three months he came to the doctor and the plaster was removed. Mulla +asked, 'Now can I go up and down the stairs?’ + +The doctor said, 'Now you can go. You are absolutely okay.’ + +Mulla said, 'Now I am so happy, doctor. You cannot believe how happy I am. It was so +awkward to go up and down the drain-pipe the whole day. For three months, every day +going up and down the drain-pipe — it was so awkward, and the whole neighborhood was +laughing at me. But you had told me not to go up and down the stairs, so I had to find a +way.’ + + + +This is what everyone is doing. If one outlet is blocked, then a perversion is bound to +happen. And you don't know the ways of the mind — =they are very cunning and very +subtle. People come to me with their problems. The problem seems to be obvious — it is +not. All problems seem to be obvious, clear — it is not so. Deep down something else is +hidden, and unless that something else is known, discarded, gone beyond, the problem +will remain. It will change its shape. + +Someone is smoking too much and he wants to stop it. But smoking in itself is not a +problem; the problem is something else. + +You can stop smoking, but the problem will remain, and it will have to come out in +something else. When do you smoke? When you are anxious, nervous, you start smoking, +and smoking helps you. You feel more confident, you feel more relaxed. + +Just by stopping the smoking, your nervousness is not going to change. You will feel +nervous, you will feel anxious; the anxiety will come. Then you will do something else. +And you can find something which is a beautiful substitute; it looks so different. You can +do anything. You can just use a mantra instead of smoking, and whenever you feel +nervous you can say, RAM, RAM, RAM — anything continuously. + +What are you doing with smoke? It is a mantra. You smoke in and out, you smoke in and +out — it becomes a repetitive thing. Because of the repetition you feel relaxed. Repeat +anything and the same will happen. But if you are using a mantra and saying, RAM, +RAM, RAM, no one is going to say that you are doing something wrong. And the +problem is the same. + +The problem has not changed; only you have changed the trick. Previously you were +doing it with smoke; now you are doing it with a word. Repetition helps; any nonsense +thing will help. You just have to repeat it continuously. When you repeat a thing it gives +relaxation, because it creates a sort of boredom. Boredom is relaxing. You can do +anything that creates a sort of boredom. + +Boredom is relaxing. You can do anything that creates boredom. + +If you are smoking, everyone will say that it is wrong. And if you are chanting a mantra, +no one is going to say that it is wrong. But if the problem is the same, I am saying that it +is also wrong — rather, more dangerous than the previous one, because with smoking you +were aware that it was wrong. Now, with this chanting of the mantra you are not aware, +and this disease that you are unaware is more dangerous and more harmful. + +You can do anything on the surface, but unless deeper roots are changed, nothing +happens. So with the outer remember this: be aware of it, and move from the surface +towards the roots and find the root — why are you nervous? Someone is eating too much +food. It can be stopped. You can force yourself to not eat too much. But why is one +eating too much food? Why? Because this is not a bodily need, so somewhere the mind is +interfering. Something has to be done with the mind; it is not a question of the body. Why +do you go on stuffing yourself? + +Too much obsession with food is a love need. If you are not loved well, you will eat +more. If you are loved and you can love, you will eat less. Whenever someone loves you, +you cannot eat more. Love fills you so much, you don't feel empty. When there is not +love, you feel empty; something has to be stuffed in — you go on forcing food. + + +And there are reasons, root reasons, for it, because the first encounter of the child with + + + +love and food is simultaneous. From the same breast, from the same mother, he gets food +and love — food and love become associated. If the mother is loving, the child will never +take too much mild. There is no need. He is always secure in his love; he knows that +whenever there is a need the food will come, the milk will be there, the mother will be +there. He feels secure. But if the mother is non-loving, then he is insecure. Then he +doesn't know whether, when he feels hungry, food will come, because there is no love. + +He will eat more. And this will continue. It will become an unconscious root. + +So you can go on changing your food — eat this, eat that, don’t eat this — but it makes no +difference, because the basic root remains there. Then if you stop stuffing yourself with +food, you will start stuffing with something else. And there are many ways. If you stop +eating too much you may start accumulating money. Then again you have to be filled by +something; then you go on accumulating money. + +Observe deeply, and you will see that a person who accumulates money is never in love, +cannot be, because the money accumulation is really a substitute. With money he will +feel secure now. When you are loved there is no insecurity; in love all fears disappear. In +love there is no future, no past. + +This moment is enough, this very moment is eternity. You are accepted. There is no +anxiety for the future, for what will happen tomorrow — there is no tomorrow in love. + +But if love is not there, then the tomorrow is there. What will happen? Accumulate +money, because you cannot rely on any person. So rely on things, rely on money and +wealth. There are people who say, 'Donate your money. Don’t accumulate money. Be +non-attached to money.’ But these are superficial things, because the inner need will +remain the same — then he will start accumulating something else. + +Stop one outlet and you will have to create another — unless roots are destroyed. So don’t +be too much concerned with the outer. Be aware of whatsoever your outer personality is. +Be aware of it, be alert, and from the periphery always move towards the roots to find +what the cause is there. Howsoever disturbing, move to the roots. Once you come to +know the roots, once the roots are exposed.... Remember this law: the roots can exist only +in darkness — not only the roots of trees, but the roots of anything. They can exist only in +darkness. Once they are brought to light, they die. + +So move with your periphery; dig it deep and go to the roots, and bring the roots to +consciousness, to light. Once you have come to the root, it simply disappears. You have +not to do anything about it. You have to do something only because you don’t know what +the problem is. + +A problem rightly understood disappears. Right understanding of a problem, a root +understanding of the problem, becomes the disappearance of it. The first thing. + +The second thing: whatsoever you do is superficial; it is not you in your totality. So don’t +judge a man by his actions, because action is very atomic. You see a person in anger, and +you can judge that this man is filled with hatred, violence, vengeance. But a moment later +the anger disappears; the man becomes as loving as possible, and a different perfume, a +different flowering, comes to his face. The anger was atomic. Don’t judge the whole man. +But this love is also atomic. Don’t judge the whole man by this love. + +Whatsoever you have done is not your total sum. Your actions remain just atomic — part +of you of course, but your totality transcends them. You can be different immediately. +And whatsoever is known about you by your behavior, by your actions, by your doings, +you can contradict. You may have been a saint: you can become a sinner this very + + + +moment. No one could imagine that you, a saint, could do this. You can do it. It is not +inconceivable. You may have been a sinner up to this moment, and the next moment you +can jump out of it. + +What I am saying is, your inner is so vast and so great that by your outer it cannot be +judged. Your outer remains superficial, accidental. I will repeat it. + +Your outer remains accidental, your inner is the essence. So remember to uncover the +inner, and don’t get entangled with the outer. + +One thing more: outer is always of the past. It is always dead, because whatsoever you +have done, you have done. It is always of the past, it is never alive. The inner is always +alive, it is here and now, and the outer is always dead. If you know me — whatsoever I +have done and said — you know my past, you don’t know me. I am here, the living. That +is my inner point, and whatsoever you know about me is just the outer. It is dead, it is no +more there. + +Observe it in your own consciousness. Whatsoever you have done is not a bondage on +you. It is no more really; it is just a memory. And you are greater than that. Your infinite +possibilities are there. It was only accidental that you are a sinner or you are a saint. It +was only accidental that you are a Christian or a Hindu. But your innermost being is not +accidental; it is essential. + +The emphasis on the inner is the emphasis on the essential. And that inner remains free, it +is freedom. The outer is a slavery, because you can know the outer only when it has +happened; then you cannot do anything about it. What can you do about your past? It +cannot be undone, you cannot move backwards. You cannot do anything with the past; it +is a slavery. + +If you understand it rightly, then you can understand the theory of karma, the theory of +actions. + +This theory — one of the most essential parts of Hindu realization — is that unless you go +beyond kannas, you are not free; unless you have gone beyond all actions, you will +remain in bondage. Don’t pay much attention to the outer, don't get obsessed with it. Use +it as a help, but continuously remembering that the inner has to be discovered. + +These techniques we are discussing here are for the inner, for how to discover it. I will +tell you one thing. There have been traditions.... For example, one of the most important +religious traditions has been Jainism. But Jainism pays too much attention to the outer; +too much, so much so that they completely forget that there is anything like meditation, +that there is anything like a science of yoga. They forget it completely. + +They are obsessed with food, with clothes, with sleep, with everything — but with no +effort towards meditation. Not that in their tradition originally there was no meditation, +because no religion can be born without it, but they got obsessed somewhere with the +outer. It became so important that they forgot completely that this whole situation is just +a help; it is not the goal. + +What you eat is not the goal. What you are is the goal. It is good if your eating habits +help you to uncover the being. It is good. But if you become just obsessed with eating, +continuously thinking about it, then you have missed the point. + +Then you are a food-addict. You are mad, neurotic. + +Question 2 + + + +ISN’T IT TRUE THAT ALL MEDITATION TECHNIQUES ARE REALLY DOINGS +WHICH LEAD THE SEEKER TO HIS BEING? + + +In a way, yes; and in a deeper way, no. Meditation techniques are doings, because you +are advised to do something. Even to meditate is to do something, even to sit silently is to +do something, even to not do anything is a sort of doing. So in a superficial way, all +meditation techniques are doings. But in a deeper way they are not, because if you +succeed in them, the doing disappears. + +Only in the beginning it appears like an effort. If you succeed in it, the effort disappears +and the whole thing becomes spontaneous and effortless. If you succeed in it, it is not a +doing. No effort on your part is needed then. It becomes just like breathing — it is there. +But in the beginning the effort is bound to be, because the mind cannot do anything +which is not an effort. If you tell it to be effortless, the whole thing seems absurd. + +In Zen, where much emphasis is paid to effortlessness, the masters say to the disciples, +'Just sit. Don’t do anything.’ And the disciple tries. Of course, what can you do other than +trying? The disciple tries to just sit, and he tries to just sit, and he tries to not do anything, +and then the master hits him on his head with his staff and he says, 'Don’t do this! I have +not told you to try to sit, because that becomes an effort. + +And don’t try not to do anything, because that is a sort of doing. Simply sit!’ + +If I tell you to simply sit, what will you do? You will do something, which will make it +not a simple sitting; an effort will enter. You will be sitting with an effort; a strain will be +there. You cannot simply sit. It looks strange, but the moment you try to sit simply, it has +become complex. The very effort to simply sit makes it complex. So what to do? + +Years pass, and the disciple goes on sitting and being blamed, condemned by the master +that he is missing the point. But he simply goes on, goes on, goes on, and every day he is +a failure, because the effort is there. And he cannot deceive the master. But one day, just +patiently sitting, even this consciousness to sit simply disappears. One day suddenly he is +sitting — like a tree or like a rock — not doing anything. And then the master says, 'This +is the right posture. Now you have attained it. Now remember this. This is the way to sit.’ +But it takes patience and long effort to achieve effortlessness. + +In the beginning, effort will be there, doing will be there, but only in the beginning as a +necessary evil. But you have to remember constantly that you have to go beyond it. A +moment must come when you are not doing anything about meditation — just being there +and it happens; just sitting or standing and it happens; not doing anything, just being +aware, it happens. + + +All these techniques are just to help you to come to an effortless moment. The inner +transfonnation, the inner realization, cannot happen through effort, because effort is a +sort of tension. With effort you cannot be relaxed totally; the effort will become a barrier. +With this background in mind, if you make effort, by and by you will become capable of +leaving it also. + +It is just like swimming. If you know about swimming, you know that in the beginning +you have to make effort — but only in the beginning. Once you know the feel of it, once +you know what it is, the effort has gone; you can swim effortlessly. And even a good +swimmer cannot say what swimming is, what exactly he is doing. He cannot explain to +you what he is doing. Really, he is not doing anything. He is simply allowing himself to + + + +be in a deep responsive relationship with the water, with the river. He is not doing +anything really. And if he is still doing, he is still not an expert swimmer — he is still +amateur, still learning. + +I will tell you one anecdote. In Burma, one Buddhist monk was ordered to make a design +for the new temple, particularly for the gate. So he was making many designs. He had +one very talented disciple, so he told that disciple to be near him. While he made the +design the disciple was simply to watch, and if he liked it he had to say that it was okay, +it was right. If he didn’t like it then he had to say no. + +And the master said, 'When you say yes, only then will I send the design. If you go on +saying no, I will discard the design and will create a new one.’ + +Hundreds of designs were discarded in this way. Three months passed. Even the master +became afraid, but he had given his word so he had to keep it. The disciple was there, the +master would make the design, and then the disciple would say no. The master would +start another one. + +One day the ink was just about to be finished, so the master said, 'Go out and find more +ink.’ The disciple went out. The master forgot him, his presence, and became effortless. +His presence was the problem. The idea was constantly in his mind that the disciple was +there, judging. He was constantly wondering whether he was going to like it or not, +whether he would discard it again. This created an inner anxiety and the master could not +be spontaneous. + +The disciple went out. The design was completed. The disciple came in and he said +'Wonderful! But why couldn’t you do it before?’ + +The master said, 'Now I understand why — because you were here. Because of you — I +was making an effort to get your approval. The effort destroyed the whole thing. I +couldn’t be natural, I couldn’t flow, I couldn’t forget myself because of you.’ + +Whenever you are doing meditation, the very effort that you are doing it, the very idea of +succeeding in it, is the barrier. + +Be conscious of it. Go on doing, and be conscious of it. A day will come... just through +patience a day comes when effort is not there. Really, you are not there, only meditation +is. It may take a long time. It cannot be predicted, no one can say when it will happen. +Because if something is to be achieved by effort, it can be predicted — that if you do this +much effort you will succeed — but meditation is going to succeed only when you +become effortless. That’s why nothing can be predicted. Nothing can be said about when +you will succeed. You may succeed this very moment, and you may not succeed for lives. +The whole thing hinges on one thing — when your effort drops and you become +spontaneous, when your meditation is not an act but becomes your being, when your +meditation is just like love.... + +You cannot do anything about love, or can you? If you do anything, you falsify it. It will +become artificial. It will not go deep. You will not be in it. It will become an acting. Love +IS — you cannot do anything about it. + +You cannot do anything about meditation also. But I don’t mean don’t do anything, +because then you will remain whatsoever you are. You have to do something, perfectly +conscious that by only doing you will not achieve. Doing will be needed in the +beginning. One cannot leave it; one has to go through it. But one has to go through it, one +has to transcend it, and an effortless floating has to be achieved. + + + +The path is arduous and very contradictory. You cannot find anything more contradictory +than meditation. Contradictory because it has to be started as an effort and it has to end as +effortlessness. But it happens. You may not be able to conceive logically hot it happens, +but in experience it happens. A day comes when you just get fed up with your effort. It +falls. + +It happened to Buddha this way. For six years he was making every effort possible. No +human being has been so obsessed with becoming enlightened. He did everything that he +could do. He moved from one teacher to another, and whatsoever he was taught, he did it +perfectly. That was the problem, because no teacher could say to him, 'You are not doing +well, that’s why you are not achieving.’ That was impossible. He was doing better than +any master, so the masters had to confess. They said, 'This much we have to teach. +Beyond this we don’t know, so you go somewhere else.’ + +He was a dangerous disciple — and only dangerous disciples achieve. He studied +everything that was possible. Whatsoever he was told, he would do it — absolutely as it +was told. And then he would come to the master and say, 'I have done it, but nothing has +happened. So what next?’ + +The teachers would say, 'You go somewhere else. There is one teacher in the Himalayas +— go there.’ Or, 'There is one teacher in some forest — go there. + +We don’t know more than this.’ + +He went around and around for six years. He did all that can be done, all that is humanly +possible, and then he got fed up. The whole thing appeared futile, fruitless, meaningless. +One night he relaxed all efforts. He was sitting under the Bodhi tree, and he said, 'Now +everything is finished. In the world there is nothing, and in this spiritual search also there +is nothing. Now there is nothing for me to do. Everything is finished. Not only this world, +but the other world also. Suddenly all efforts dropped. He was empty. Because when +there is nothing to do, the mind cannot move. The mind moves only because there is +something to do — some motivation, some goal. The mind moves because something is +possible, something can be achieved, the future. If not today then tomorrow, but the +possibility is there that one can achieve it — the mind moves. + +That night Buddha came to a dead point. Really, he died that very moment, because there +was no future. Nothing was to be achieved, and nothing could be achieved — 'I have done +everything. The whole world is futile and this whole existence is a nightmare.’ Not only +the material world became futile, but the spiritual also. He relaxed. Not that he did +something to relax. This is the point to understand: there was nothing to be tense, +therefore he relaxed. There was no effort on his part to relax. + + +Under the Bodhi tree he was not trying relaxation. There was nothing to do, nothing to be +tense, nothing to desire, no future, no hope. He was absolutely hopeless that night — +relaxed. Relaxation happened. You cannot relax, because something or other is still there +to be achieved. That goes on stirring your mind; you go on spinning and spinning around +and around. Suddenly the spinning stopped, the wheel stopped — Buddha relaxed and fell +asleep. + +In the morning when he awoke, the last star was setting. He looked at the last star +disappear, and with that last star disappearing, he disappeared completely, he became an +enlightened one. Then people started asking, 'How did you achieve this? How? What + + + +was the method?' + +Now you can understand Buddha's difficulty. If he said that he had achieved through +some methods, then he was wrong, because he achieved only when there was no method. +If he said that he had achieved through effort, then he was wrong, because he achieved +only when there was no effort. But if he said, 'Don’t make any effort and you will +achieve,’ then too he was wrong, because to his no-effort those six years of effort were +the background. Without that effort, that six years' arduous effort, this state of no-effort +could not have been achieved. Only because of that mad effort he came to a peak and +there was nowhere further to go; he relaxed and fell down in the valley. + + +This has to be remembered for many reasons. Spiritual effort is the most contradictory +phenomenon. Effort has to be made, with full consciousness that nothing can be achieved +through effort. Effort has to be made only to achieve no-effort, only to achieve +effortlessness. But don’t relax your effort, because if you relax you will never achieve +that relaxation which came to Buddha. You go on doing every effort, so automatically a +moment comes when just by sheer effort you reach a point where relaxation happens to +you. + +For example, you may take it in a different way. As I see it, in the west, ego has been the +central point: the fulfillment of the ego, the development of the ego, the achievement of a +strong ego, has been the whole western effort. In the east, it has been how to achieve +egolessness, how to be a non-ego, how to forget, surrender, dissolve yourself completely +so that you are not. The east has been trying for egolessness. The west has been trying for +the perfect ego. + +But this is the contradictoriness of things: if you don’t have a very developed ego, you +cannot surrender. You can surrender only if you have a perfectly clearcut ego. Otherwise +you cannot surrender, because who will surrender? So to me, both are half and both are in +misery — east and west both. Because the east has taken egolessness, which is the end +part, and the beginning part is missing. + + +Who will surrender the ego? The peak is not there, so who will create the valley? The +valley is created only around a peak. The greater the peak, the deeper the valley. If you +don’t have an ego, or a very lukewarm one, surrender is not possible. Or, your surrender +will be a lukewarm surrender, just so-so. Nothing will happen out of it; there will be no +explosion. + +In the west, the beginning part has been emphasized. So you can go on growing with +your ego. It will create more and more anxiety. And when you have really created it, you +don't know what to do with it, because the end part is not there. + +To me, the spiritual search is both. Create a very great peak, create a perfect ego, just to +dissolve it. That seems absurd — just to dissolve it, just to achieve a deep surrender, just +to lose it somewhere. And you cannot lose something which you don’t have. So in my +view, humanity has to be trained for these two things together: help everyone to create a +perfect ego, a fulfilled ego — but this is only half the journey — and then, help them to +surrender it. + +The greater the peak, the deeper will be the valley. The higher the ego, the deeper you +will move in your surrender. And this is for everything. On the spiritual path, remember +this continuous contradictoriness. Don't forget it even for a single moment. Become + + + +perfect egoists so that you can surrender, so that you can dissolve, melt. + +Do every effort that you can do, just to reach a point where effort leaves you and you are +totally effortless. + +Question 3 + +YOU SAID LAST NIGHT THAT THE MORE THE MIND GROWS, THE MORE WE +KNOW THAT THE NATURE OF THE MIND IS CONFUSION. BUT ISN’T IT TRUE +THAT THIS GROWTH OF THE MIND ALSO LEADS TO CLARITY? + +Whatsoever I was just saying is related to this. + +Yes, it leads to clarity, because only when you have a very mature mind do you become +aware that you are confused. Even to become aware that mind is confusion, a very +developed mind is needed. Those who are not aware that their mind is confusion are +really not mature minds. They are childish, juvenile, still developing. Only a very mature +mind can become aware of the quality of the mind, that it is confusion. And when you +have developed the mind, only then is meditation possible, because meditation is the +opposite goal. + +Meditation means no-mind. But how can you achieve a no-mind if you have not achieved +a mind? So achieve a mind just to lose it. And don't think that if ultimately one has to +reach the state of no-mind, then what is the use of achieving a mind? — because if you +don’t achieve a mind, the ultimate is not going to happen to you. It can happen only if the +mind is there. So I am not against mind, I am not against intellect. Really, I am not +against anything. I am for everything, because everything can be used to reach the +opposite pole. + + +There is a polarity, and the opposite pole cannot be reached if the polarity is not there. A +madman cannot meditate. Why? Because he has no mind. But this no-mind is not the no- +mind of Buddha. No-mind can have two dimensions: below mind and above mind. The +above mind is also no-mind, and the below mind is also no-mind. You can fall down +from the mind: the mind is not there, but it is not meditation. You have to go beyond +mind, only then is the Buddha's no-mind achieved. And always remember it, because +they are so similar you can misunderstand the whole thing. They are so similar. + +For example, a child is innocent. A saint is also innocent — a Jesus or a Krishna — but +their innocence is not childish. It is childlike, not childish; because a child is innocent +only because he is ignorant. He is innocent only as a negative thing, just the absence. +Sooner or later everything will erupt; he is a volcano waiting to erupt. The innocence is +just the silence before the volcano erupts. + +A saint is one who has gone beyond. The eruption has happened; the volcano is silent +again. But this silence is different. The first silence was very pregnant; something was +present there. The silence was just on the surface; deep down that child was getting ready +to be disturbed. The saint has passed the disturbance. The cyclone has gone. This silence, +the innocence, appears similar, but there is a deep difference. + + +So sometimes an idiot can also appear to be saint-like. And idiots are saint-like. They are +not cunning; to be cunning, intelligence is needed. They are not calculating; to be + + + +calculating, mind is needed. Idiots are simple, innocent, non-cunning, non-calculating. +They cannot deceive anyone. Not that they would not like to; they cannot. The very +capacity is not there. They look like saints, and sometimes saints look like idiots, because +the same thing has happened again, in a different, altogether different, dimension. + +You can fall down below the mind: then too a no-mind happens, but it is not meditation. +You have simply lost even that mind which was going to become a step towards +meditation. So I am not against mind. Develop mind, develop intellect, but remember +well — this is just a means, and a means which has to be forsaken, thrown away. It has to +be used like a boat. You reach the other shore, you leave the boat. You forget about the +boat completely. + +Question 4 + +WE VERY OFTEN FEEL THAT WE CREATE OUR OWN SUFFERINGS. IN SPITE +OF THIS, WHY DO WE CONTINUE CREATING THEM? AND WHEN AND HOW +DOES ONE STOP CREATING ONE’S OWN SUFFERING? + +The first thing, and very basic to be understood, is that whenever you say WE VERY +OFTEN FEEL THAT WE CREATE OUR OWN SUFFERING, this is not the case. You +never really feel that you are the creator of your own suffering. + +You may think so, because you have been taught so; because for centuries and centuries +teachers have been teaching that you are the creator of your own suffering and no one +else is responsible. + +You have heard these things, you have read these things. They have become your blood +and bone, they have become your unconscious conditionings, so sometimes you repeat +like a parrot WE CREATE OUR OWN SUFFERING. But this is not your feeling, this is +not your realization, because if you realize it, then the other thing is impossible. Then you +cannot say, IN SPITE OF THIS, WHY DO WE CONTINUE CREATING IT? + +If you really feel, and if it is your own feeling that you are the creator of your own +suffering, any moment you can stop — unless you want to create it, unless you enjoy it, +unless you are a masochist. Then everything is okay, then there is no question. If you say, +'I enjoy my suffering,’ then it is okay; you can go on creating it. But if you say, 'I suffer +and I want to go beyond it. I want to stop it completely — and I understand that I am the +creator,’ then you are wrong. You don’t understand it. + +Socrates is reported to have said that knowledge is virtue. And there has been a long +discussion for these two thousand years over whether Socrates is right or wrong — +knowledge is virtue. Socrates says that once you know something, you cannot do +contrary to it. If you know that anger is suffering, you cannot be angry. + +This is what Socrates means — knowledge is virtue. You cannot say, 'I know anger is +bad; still I move in it. What to do about it now?’ Socrates says that the first thing is +wrong. You don’t know that anger is bad; that’s why you go on moving in it. If you know, +you cannot move in it. How can you move against your own knowledge? + +I know that if I put my hand in the fire it is going to be painful. If I know, I cannot put my +hand in. But if somebody else has told me, if I have heard through the tradition, if I have +read in the scriptures that fire bums, and I have not known fire, and I have not known any +similar experience, only then can I put my hand into fire — and that too only once. + +Can you conceive it? That you have put your hand into fire and you have been burned + + + +and you have suffered, and again you go and ask, 'I know that fire burns, but in spite of it +I go on putting my hand into the fire. What to do about it?’ Who will believe that you +know? And what type of knowledge is this? If your own experience of suffering and +burning cannot stop you, nothing is going to stop you. Now there is no possibility, +because the last possibility has been missed. But no one can miss it; that is impossible. +Socrates is right, and all those who have know, they will agree with Socrates — that +agreement has a very deep point in it. Once you know.... But remember — the knowledge +must be yours. + +A borrowed knowledge won’t do; borrowed knowledge is useless. Unless it is your own +experience, it is not going to change you. Others' experiences are of no help. + +You have heard that you are the creator of your own suffering, but this is just in the mind. +It has not entered your being, it is not your own knowledge. So when you are discussing, +you can discuss about it cerebrally, but when the actual phenomenon happens, you will +forget, and you will behave in the way you know, not in the way others know. + +When you are at ease, cool, collected, silently discussing anger, you can say it is poison, +it is a disease, evil. But when someone makes you angry then a complete change occurs. +Not it is not an intellectual discussion, now you are involved. And the moment you are +involved, you become angry. Later on again, retrospectively, when you again get cool, +the memory will come back, your mind will again start functioning, and you will say, +'That was wrong. It was not good of me to do that. I know anger is wrong.’ + +Who is this 'I'? — just intellect, just the superficial mind. You don't know — because +when someone pushes you into anger, you throw this mind away. It is useful as far as +discussion is concerned, but when a real situation arises, only the real knowledge will +help. When there is no situation, you can go on. Even in a discussion the real situation +can arise. + +The other can go on contradicting you so much that you become angry and then you will +forget. + +Real knowledge means that which has happened to you. You have not heard about it, not +read about it, you have not collected information about it — it is your own experience. +And then there is no question, because after that you cannot go against it. Not that you +will have to make an effort not to go against it; simply you cannot go against it. + +How can I? When I know this is a wall and I want to go out of this room, how can I try to +pass through the wall? I know this is a wall, so I will search for the door. Only a blink +man will try to go out through the wall. I have got eyes. I see what is a wall and what is a +door. + +But if I try to enter the wall and tell you, 'I know very well where the door is, and I know +this to be a wall, but in spite of this, how can I stop myself from trying to enter the wall?’ +then that means that as far as I am concerned that door looks false. Others have told me +that it is the door, but as far as I am concerned, I know that door is false. And others have +told me that this is a wall, but as far as I see, I see the door here in this wall, and that is +why I try. + +In this situation you have to make a clearcut distinction between what you know and +what you have gathered as knowledge. Don’t rely on information. From the greatest +source — even if you collect from the greatest source — information is infonnation. + + +Even if a Buddha says it to you, it is not your own, and it is not going to help you in any + + + +way. But you can remain thinking that it is your knowledge, and this misunderstanding +will waste your energy, time and life. + +The basic thing is not to ask what to do so that suffering is not created. The basic thing is +to know that you are the creator of your suffering. Next time whenever a real situation +arises and you are in suffering, remember to find out whether you are the cause of it. And +if you can find out that you are the cause of it, the suffering will disappear, and the same +suffering will not appear again — impossible. + +But don’t deceive yourself. You can — that's why I say it. When you are suffering you can +say, 'Yes, I know I have created this suffering,’ but deep down you know that someone +else has created it. Your wife has created it, your husband has created it, someone else +has created it, and this is simply a consolation because you cannot do anything. You +console yourself: 'No one has created it, I have created it myself, and by and by I will +stop it.’ + +But knowledge is instant transfonnation; there is no 'by and by.’ If you understand that +you have created it, it will drop immediately. And it is not going to come up again. If it +comes again, it means the understanding has not gone deep. + +So there is no need to find out what to do, and how to stop. + +The only need is to go deep and to find out who is really the cause of it. If others are the +cause then it cannot be stopped, because you cannot change the whole world. If you are +the cause, only then can it be stopped. + +That’s why I insist that only religion can lead humanity towards non-suffering. Nothing +else can lead, because everyone else believes that the suffering is caused by others; only +religion says that suffering is caused by you. So religion makes you the master of your +destiny. You are the cause of your suffering, hence you can be the cause of your bliss. + + +THE END. + + + +Chapter 51: Come back to existence + + +IN RAIN DURING A BLACK NIGHT + +ENTER THAT BLACKNESS AS THE FORM OF FORMS. + +WHEN A MOONLESS RAINY NIGHT IS NOT PRESENT, + +CLOSE EYES AND FIND BLACKNESS BEFORE YOU. + +OPENING EYES, SEE BLACKNESS. + +SO FAULTS DISAPPEAR FOREVER. + +WHEREVER YOUR ATTENTION ALIGHTS, + +AT THIS VERY POINT, + +EXPERIENCE. + +Once a doctor, a very well known historian and an eminent scholar, was staying in a +village. The postmaster, the old postmaster of the village, became curious about this old +man, this doctor. He was curious to know what kind of doctor he is, so one day he asked, +'What kind of doctor are you sir?’ + +The man said, 'Doctor of Philosophy.’ + +The old man had never heard about it. He was puzzled and he said, 'I have never heard of +any case of this disease here.’ + +Don’t laugh about it, because that old postmaster was right in a way — philosophy is a +kind of disease. Of course, doctors of philosophy are not doctors; rather, they are the +perfect victims of a disease. + +Philosophy is not a specific disease, so you cannot think of it in terms of cases. It is born +with the human being. It is as old as humanity or the human mind. And every human +being is a victim, more or less — because thinking leads nowhere; or, it leads you in +circles, vicious circles. You move much, and if you are expert you can move fast, but you +reach nowhere. + + +This has to be understood very deeply, because if you cannot understand and feel this, +you cannot take a jump into meditation. Meditation means the very anti approach — anti +to philosophy. Philosophy means thinking and meditation means a state of non-thinking. +They are polar opposites. + +This is just human — to think about questions and to try to find out answers. But +philosophy comes to no answers. Science comes to certain answers, religion comes to +certain answers, but philosophy comes to no answers. And all the answers that +philosophy appears to come to are just facades: if you dig deep in them you will find +more questions and nothing else. So every answer leads to more questions — and this +goes on and on. + +Science comes to certain answers, because science depends not on thinking but on +experimentation. Thinking is used as a help only, but the base is experimentation. That’s +why science has given some answers. Philosophers, known and unknown, have been +working and working for centuries, but not a single answer, not a single conclusion has +been achieved. It cannot be achieved. The very nature of thinking is such that if you use +thinking as a help towards experimentation, something can be achieved; that’s why +science comes to certain answers. + +But religion also comes to certain answers, because religion is also experimentation. + + + +Science experiments with the object, religion experiments with the subject, but both are +experimentations and both depend on experiment. + + +Between these two is philosophy — just pure thinking, abstract thinking, with no +experiment. You can go on, you can go on, but you reach nowhere. Abstract thinking, +speculative thinking, is thinking ad infinitum. You can enjoy, you can enjoy the journey, +but there is no goal. + +Religion and science are similar in a way — both believe in experiment. Religious +experiment is of course deeper than scientific, because in science the experimenter +himself is not involved. He is working with tools, working with things, working with +objects; he remains aloof, he remains out of the experiment. Religion is a deeper science, +because the experimenter himself becomes the experiment. There are no tools which are +apart from him, no objects which are outside him. He is both — his tools, his objects, his +method; he is everything. And he has to work upon himself. + +It is arduous. Because you are involved, it is arduous. And because you are involved, the +experiment will become experience. In science, the experiment will remain an +experiment will remain an experiment. The scientist will not be touched by it, will not be +transfonned by it. The scientist will remain the same. But in religion, passing through the +experiment, you will be a different man altogether. You cannot come out the same; you +are bound to change. That's why religious experiment becomes experience. + +Remember this: you can go on thinking about God, about soul, about the other world, and +you may make believe that you know something about God just by thinking 'about'. + +That will be false. You cannot know anything about God — the word 'about' is absurd. +You can know God, but you cannot know 'about' — that 'about' creates philosophy. + +How can you know about God? Or, for example, how can you know about love? You can +know love, you cannot about love, because 'about' means someone else knows and you +believe in his knowledge. You collect and gather opinions. You say, 'I know something +about God.’ All knowledge which is 'about' is false, dangerous, because you can be +deluded by it. + +You can know God, you can know love, you can know yourself, but forget that 'about'. +That 'about' is philosophy. The Upanishads say something, the Vedas say something, the +Bible says something, the Koran says something, but for you, all that will become +'about'. Unless it becomes your experience it is futile, wasted. + +This point must go deep within you, because you can go on thinking, and the mind is +such that you can start thinking about meditation. You can make anything an object for +meditation, for thinking. Even about meditation you can think, and you can go on +thinking about it — nothing will happen. + +I am talking about so many methods. There is a danger: you may start thinking about +these methods, you may become knowledgeable. That won’t do, that is of no use. Not +only is it of no use, it is dangerous — because meditation is experience, knowing 'about' +is worthless. + + +Remember this word 'experience'. Life's problems, all the problems of life, are +existential, they are not speculative. You cannot solve them by thinking; you can solve +them only by living them. Through living the future opens. Through thinking the future +never opens. On the contrary, even the present closes. + + + +You may not have observed: whenever you think, what happen? Whenever you think, +you are closed. All that is present drops. You move on a dream-path in your mind. One +word creates another, one thought creates another, and you go on moving. The more you +move in thinking, the further away you go from existence. Thinking is a way to go away. +It is a dream-way; it is dreaming in concepts. Come back to the earth. Religion is very +earthly in this sense; not worldly but very earthly, substantial. Come back to existence. +Life's problems can be solved only when you become deeply rooted in existence. Flying +in thoughts you move away from the roots, and the further away you are, the less is the +possibility of solving anything. Rather, you will confuse everything, and everything will +become more entangled. And the more entangled, the more you will think, and the further +away you will move. Beware of thinking! + +Now we will enter the techniques. + +The first technique: + +IN RAIN DURING A BLACK NIGHT, + +ENTER THAT BLACKNESS AS THE FORM OF FORMS. + + +There has been one very old esoteric school about which you may not have heard. The +school was known as the school of Essenes. Jesus was taught in that school; he belonged +to the Essenes group. That Essenes group is the only group all over the world who thinks +of God as absolute darkness. The Koran says God is light, the Upanishads say God is +light, the Bible says God is light. The Essenes group is the only tradition in the world +which says that God is absolute blackness, absolute darkness, just an infinite black night. +This is very beautiful; strange, but very beautiful — and very meaningful. You must +understand the meaning, then this technique will be very helpful, because this is the +technique used by the Essenes to enter darkness, to become one with it. + +Reflect. Why has God been symbolized everywhere as light? Not because God is light, +but because man is afraid of darkness. This is human fear — we like light and we are +afraid of darkness, so we cannot conceive God as darkness, as blackness. This is human +conception. We conceive God as light because we are afraid of darkness. + +Our gods are created out of our fear. We give them shape and fonn. That shape and form +is given by us — it shows something about us, not about our gods. They are our creations. +We are afraid in darkness, so God is light. But these techniques belong to the other +school. + + +Essenes say that God is darkness, and there is something in it. One thing: darkness is +eternal. Light comes and goes and darkness remains. In the morning the sun will rise and +there will be light; in the evening the sun will set and there will be darkness. For darkness +nothing will rise — it is always there. It never rises and never sets. Light comes and goes; +darkness remains. Light always has some source; darkness is without source. That which +has some source cannot be infinite; only that which is sourceless can be infinite and +eternal. Light has a certain disturbance; that's why you cannot sleep in light. It creates a +tension. Darkness is relaxation, total relaxation. + +But why are we afraid of darkness? Because light appears to us as life — it is; and + + + +darkness appears to be death — it is. Life comes through light, and when you die it +appears you have fallen into eternal darkness. That's why we paint death as black, and +black has become a color for mourning. God is light, and death is black. But these are our +fears projected. Actually, darkness has infinity; light is limited. Darkness seems to be the +womb out of which everything arises and into which everything falls. + +Essenes took this standpoint. It is very beautiful and very helpful also, because if you can +love darkness you will become unafraid of death. If you can enter into darkness — and +you can enter only when there is no fear — you will achieve total relaxation. + +If you can become one with darkness, you are dissolved, it is a surrender. Now there is no +fear, because if you have become one with darkness, you have become one with death. +You cannot die now. You have become deathless. Darkness is deathless. Light is born +and dies; darkness simply is. It is deathless. + +For these techniques, first you will have to remember that there should be no fear in your +mind about darkness, about blackness, otherwise how can you do this experiment? First +the fear must be dropped. So do one thing as a preliminary step: sit in darkness, put off +the lights, feel darkness. Have a loving attitude towards it; allow the darkness to touch +you. Look at it. Open your eyes in a dark room or in a dark night; have a communion, be +together, imbibe a relationship. You will become afraid — then these techniques cannot +be of any help, you cannot do them. + +First a deep friendship with darkness is needed. Sometimes in the night when everyone +has gone to sleep, remain with the darkness. Don't do anything, just remain with it. And +just remaining with it will give you a deep feeling towards it, because it is so relaxing. +You have not known it simply because of the fear. If you are not feeling sleepy, you will +put on the light immediately, you will start reading or doing something, but you will not +remain with the darkness. Remain with it. If you can remain with it, you will have new +openings, new contacts with it. + + +Man has closed himself completely against darkness. There were reasons, historical +reasons — because the night was very dangerous, and man was in the caves or in the +jungles. In the day he was more secure: he could see all around, and no wild animals +could attack him; or, he could make some arrangements, some defence — at least he could +escape. But in the night everywhere was darkness and he was helpless, so he became +afraid — and that fear has gone into the unconscious; still we are afraid. + +We are not living in caves now and we are not at the mercy of wild animals, no one is +going to attack us — but the fear is there, it has gone deep, because for millions of years +the human mind was afraid. Your unconsciousness is not your own; it is collective, it is +hereditary, it has come down to you. The fear is there, and because of that fear you can +have no communion with darkness. + +One thing more: because of this fear, man started to worship fire. When fire was +discovered, fire became a god. Not that fire is a god, but because of the fear of darkness. +In the day there was light and no fear — man was more protected. In the night there was +darkness, so when fire was discovered, of course, fire became a god — the greatest. The +Parsees still go on worshipping fire. The worship of fire came into being because of the +fear of darkness. In the night the fire became the friend, the protector, the divine security. + + + +That fear is still there. You may not be aware of it, because no situations are there in +which you can become aware of it, but one day put off the light in the night and sit — and +the primitive fear will come to you. In your own house you will start feeling that some +wild animals are around. Some noise will come, and you will become afraid of wild +animals — some danger is around. That danger is not around; that is in your unconscious. +So first you have to overcome your unconscious fear, and then you can enter these +techniques, because these techniques are concerned with darkness. And Shiva is giving +all the techniques that are possible. + +My own experience with these techniques is very beautiful. If you can do them they are +wonderful. You will enter such a deep relaxation that you have never known. But first +uncover your unconscious fears and try to live and love darkness. It is very blissful. Once +you know, and once you are in contact with it, you are in contact with a very deep cosmic +phenomenon. + +So whenever you have the opportunity to be in the dark, and awake.... Because you can +do two things: either you can put on the light or you can go to sleep. Both are tricks to +escape the darkness. If you are asleep then you are not afraid, because you are not +conscious. Or, if you are conscious, then you will put on the light. Don’t put on the light +and don't go to sleep. + +Remain with darkness. + +Many fears will be felt. Feel them. Be aware of them. Bring them to your conscious. + +They will come by themselves, and as they come, you remain just a witness.. They will +disappear, and very soon a day will come when you can be in darkness with total +surrender, with no fear. With a total let-go you can be in darkness. Then a very beautiful +phenomenon happens. Then you can appreciate the saying of Essenes that God is +darkness, absolute darkness. + +IN RAIN DURING A BLACK NIGHT, + +ENTER THAT BLACKNESS AS THE FORM OF FORMS. + +All fonns arise out of darkness and dissolve into darkness. Worlds come, are created out +of darkness, and they fall back into darkness. Darkness is the womb, the cosmic womb. +The undisturbed, the absolute stillness is there. + +Shiva says that it will be good to do this technique in a rainy night when everything is +black, when clouds are there and no stars can be seen and the sky is completely dark. In a +black night when there is no moon... ENTER THAT BLACKNESS AS THE FORM OF +FORMS. Be a witness to that blackness, and then dissolve yourself into it. It is the form +of all forms. You are a form — you can dissolve into it. + +When there is light, you are defined. I can see you, the light is there. Your body has a +definition. You are defined, you have boundaries. Boundaries exist because of the light. + +When the light is not there, boundaries are dissolved. In blackness nothing is defined, +everything merges into every other thing. Fonns disappear. + +That may be one of the causes of our fear — because then you are not defined, then you +don’t know who you are. The face cannot be seen, the body cannot be known. Everything +merges into a formless existence. That may be one of the causes of fear — because you +cannot feel your defined existence. Existence becomes vague and fear enters, because +you don’t know now who you are. The ego cannot exist: undefined, it is difficult to exist + + + +as an ego. One feels afraid. One wants light to be there. + +Contemplating, meditating, merging, it will be easier to merge into darkness than to +merge into light, because light gives distinctions. Darkness takes away ah distinctions. In +the light you are beautiful or ugly, rich or poor. The light gives you a personality, a +distinctness — educated, uneducated, saint or sinner. The light reveals you as a distinct +person. Darkness envelops you, accepts you — not as a distinct person; it simply accepts +you without any definitions. You are enveloped and you become one. + +The darkness is doing it always, but because you are afraid you cannot understand it. put +aside your fear and become one. + +ENTER THAT BLACKNESS AS THE FORM OF ALL FORMS. + +ENTER THAT BLACKNESS. + +.. How can you enter blackness? Three things. One: stare into blackness. Difficult. It is +easy to stare at a flame, at any source of light, because it is there as an object, pointed; +you can direct your attention to it. Darkness is not an object; it is everywhere, it is ah +around. You cannot see it as an object. Stare into the vacuum. Ah around it is there; you +just look into it. Feel at ease and look into it. It will start entering your eyes. And when +the darkness enters your eyes you are entering into it. + +Remain with open eyes when doing this technique in the dark night. Don't close your +eyes, because with closed eyes you have a different darkness. That is your own, mental; it +is not real. If is not real. Really, it is a negative part; it is not positive darkness. Here is +light: you close your eyes and you can have a darkness, but that darkness is simply the +negative of the light. Just as when you look at the window and then you close your eyes +you have a negative figure of the window. Ah our experience is of light, so when we +close our eyes we have a negative experience of light which we call darkness. It is not +real, it won’t do. + +Open your eyes, remain with open eyes in darkness, and you will have a different +darkness — the positive darkness that is there. Stare into it. Go on staring into darkness. +Your tears will start, your eyes will get sore, they will hurt. + +Don't get worried, just go on. And the moment the darkness, the real darkness which is +there, enters in your eyes, it will give you a very deep soothing feeling. When real +darkness enters in you, you will be filled by it. + +And this entering of darkness will empty you of ah negative darkness. This is a very deep +phenomenon. The darkness that you have within in a negative thing; it is against the +light. It is not the absence of light; it is against the light. It is not the darkness that Shiva +is speaking of as the form of ah forms — the real darkness that's there. We are so afraid of +it that we have created many sources of light just as protection, and we live in a lighted +world. Then we close our eyes and the lighted world reflects negatively inside. We have +lost contact with the real darkness that is there — the darkness of the Essenes, or the +darkness of Shiva. We have no contact with it. We have become so much afraid of it that +we have turned ourselves completely away. We are standing with our backs to it. + +So this will be difficult, but if you can do it, it is miraculous, it is magical. You will have +a different being altogether. When darkness enters you, you enter into it. It is always +reciprocal, mutual. You cannot enter into any cosmic phenomenon without the cosmic +phenomenon entering in you. You cannot rape it, you cannot force any entry. If you are + + + +available, open, vulnerable, and if you give way for any cosmic realm to enter in you, +then only will you enter into it. + +It is always mutual. You cannot force; you can only allow it. + +It is difficult to find real darkness in cities now; difficult in our houses to find real +darkness. With the unreal light we have made everything unreal. Even our darkness is +polluted, it is not pure. So it is good to move to some remote place only to feel darkness. +Just go to a very remote village where there is no electricity, or move to a mountain peak. +Just be there for one week to experience pure darkness. + +You will come back a different man, because in those seven days of absolute darkness, +all the fears, all the primitive fears, will come up. You will have to face monsters, you +will have to face your own unconscious. The whole humanity will... it will be as if you +are passing through the whole passage that has passed, and deep from your unconscious +many things will arise. They will look real. You may get afraid, scared, because they will +be so real — and they are just your mental creations. + +Many madmen in our mad asylums are suffering not from anything else but just from the +primitive fears inside them which have erupted. The fears are there; the madmen are +afraid, scared every moment of their lives. And we don’t yet know how to allow those +primitive fears to evaporate. If madmen can be helped to meditate on darkness, madness +will disappear. + +But only in Japan do they work a little towards this. + +With their madmen they behave absolutely differently. If someone goes mad, psychotic +or neurotic, the Japanese method is to allow him to live in isolation for three weeks or for +six weeks, as the case may need. They just allow him to live in isolation. No doctor, no +psychoanalyst goes to him. Food is supplied, his needs are taken care of, and he is left +alone. + +In the night there is no lighten darkness he is alone — suffering of course, passing +through many phases. Every care is taken, but no companionship is given to him. He has +to face his own madness immediately and directly. And within three to six weeks, the +madness starts disappearing. Nothing has been done really; he has simply been left alone. +This is the only measure that has been taken. + +Western psychiatrists have become amazed. They can't understand really how it can +happen, because they work for years. They psychoanalyze, they treat, they do everything, +but they never leave the man alone. They never leave him to face his inner unconscious +totally on his own. Because the more help you give, the more you make him helpless, +because the more he depends on you. And the question is of an inner encounter; no one +can help really. So those who know, they will leave you to face yourself. + +You have to come to terms with your unconscious. And this meditation on darkness will +absorb all your madness completely. + +Try it. Even in your home you can try it. Every night, for one hour remain with darkness. +Don't do anything, just stare into darkness. You will have a melting feeling, and you will +feel that something is entering you and you are entering into something. + +Staying, living with dar kn ess for three months, for one hour a day, you will lose all +feeling of individuality, of separation. Then you will not be an island; you will become +the ocean. You will be one with darkness. And darkness is so oceanic: nothing is so vast, +nothing is so eternal. And nothing is so near you, and of nothing are you so scared and + + + +afraid. It is just by the corner, always waiting. + + +IN RAIN DURING A BLACK NIGHT, + +ENTER THAT BLACKNESS AS THE FORM OF FORMS. + +Stare so that it enters in your eyes. + +Secondly: lie down and feel as if you are near your mother. The darkness is the mother, +the mother of all. Think: when there was nothing, what was there? You cannot think of +anything else than darkness. If everything disappears, what will be there still? Darkness +will be there. + +Darkness is the mother, the womb, so lie down and feel that you are lying in the womb of +your mother. And it will become real, it will become warm, and sooner or later you will +start feeling that the darkness, the womb, is enveloping you from everywhere. You are in +it. + +And thirdly: moving, going to work, talking, eating, doing whatsoever, carry a patch of +darkness within you. + +The darkness that has entered in you, just carry it. As we were discussing about the +method of carrying a flame, carry darkness. And as I said to you that if you carry a flame +and feel you are light, your body will start radiating a certain strange light and those who +are sensitive will start feeling it, the same will happen with darkness. + +If you carry darkness within you, your whole body will become so relaxed and calm, so +cool, that it will be felt. And as when you carry light within you some people will become +attracted to you, when you carry darkness within you some people will simply escape +from you. They will become afraid and scared. They will not be able to bear so silent a +being; it will become unbearable to them. + +If you carry darkness within you, those who are afraid of darkness will try to escape from +you; they will not come near you. And everyone is afraid of darkness. You will start +feeling that friends are leaving you. Your family will get disturbed when you enter, +because you enter like a pool of coolness, and everyone is agitated and excited. It will be +difficult for them to look into your eyes, because your eyes will become deep like +valleys, an abyss. If someone looks into your eyes he will become dizzy, such a deep +abyss will be felt there. + +But you will feel many things. It will be impossible for you to get angry. Carrying +darkness within, you cannot be angry. + +Carrying a flame you can be angry very easily, more easily than ever, because the flame +can excite you. Carrying a flame you will feel more sexual than ever, because the flame +will excite you, it will create passion. But carrying darkness within you, you will feel a +deep asexuality happening to you. You will not feel sexual; you will not be able to easily +get into anger. Passion will disappear. You will not feel that you are a man or a woman. +You will feel that those words have become irrelevant, meaningless. You simply are. +Carrying darkness within for the whole day will help you very much, because then when +you contemplate and meditate on darkness in the night, the inner darkness that you have +carried the whole day will help you to meet — the inner will come to meet the outer. + +And just be remembering that you are carrying darkness — you are filled with darkness, +every pore of the body, every cell of the body is filled with darkness — you will feel so +relaxed. Try it. You will feel so relaxed. Everything in you will be slowed down. You + + + +will not be able to run, you will walk, and that walk also will be slowed down. You will +walk slowly, just as a pregnant woman walks. You will walk slowly, very carefully. You +are carrying something. + +And quite the opposite will happen when you are carrying a flame: your walk will +become faster; rather, you would like to run. + +There will be more movement, you will become more active. Carrying darkness you will +be relaxed. Others will start feeling that you are lazy. + +In the days when I was at university, I was doing this experiment for two years. I became +so lazy that even to get out of bed in the morning was difficult. My professors became +very much disturbed about it, and they thought something had gone wrong with me — +either I was ill, or I had become absolutely indifferent. One professor who loved me very +much, the head of my department, became so worried that on my examination days he +would come to fetch me from the hostel in the morning just to lead me to the examination +hall so that I could be there on time. Every day he would see that I had entered the hall, +and only then would he feel okay and go home. + +Try it. It is one of the most beautiful experiences in life to carry darkness in your womb, +to become dark. Walking, eating, sitting, doing whatsoever, remember, the darkness is +filled in you; you are filled with it. And then see how things change. You cannot get +excited, you cannot be very active, you cannot be tense. Your sleep will become so deep +that dreams will disappear and the whole day you will move as if intoxicated. + +Sufis have used this method, a particular sect of Sufis, and those Sufis are known as +drunken Sufis. They are drunk with this darkness. They make holes in the ground, and +they lie down in the holes every night, and they meditate lying down in their holes — +meditating darkness, becoming one with it. + +And their eyes will show you that they are intoxicated. You can feel from their eyes such +deep relaxation, such a relaxed vibration, that it can happen only if you are deeply +intoxicated or feeling very sleepy. Only then can your eyes show that expression. They +are known as drunken Sufis — and they are drunk with darkness. + +The second technique: + +WHEN A MOONLESS RAINY NIGHT IS NOT PRESENT +CLOSE EYES AND FIND BLACKNESS BEFORE YOU. + +OPENING EYES, SEE BLACKNESS. + +SO FAULTS DISAPPEAR FOREVER. + +I said that if you close your eyes the blackness will be false, so what to do if there is no +moonless night, no dark night? If there is a moon and the moonlight is there? This sutra +gives a key. + +WHEN A MOONLESS RAINY NIGHT IS NOT PRESENT +CLOSE EYES AND FIND BLACKNESS BEFORE YOU. + +This blackness will be false in the beginning. You can make it real, and the method to +make it real is — OPENING EYES, SEE BLACKNESS. First close your eyes, see +blackness. Then open the eyes, and the blackness that you have seen within, see it + + + +without. If it disappears without, that means that your blackness that you have seen +within was false. + +This is a little bit more difficult. In the first you carry the real darkness within. In the +second you carry the false out — go on carrying it. + +Close your eyes, feel darkness; open your eyes, and with open eyes see the darkness out. +This is how you throw the inner false darkness out — go on throwing it. It will take at +least three to six weeks, and then one day suddenly you will be able to carry the inner +darkness out. The day you can carry the inner darkness out, you have come upon the +inner real darkness. The real can be carried; the false cannot be carried. + +And it is a very magical experience. If you can carry the inner darkness out, even in a +lightened room you can carry it out, and a patch of darkness spreads before you. The +experience is very weird, because the room is lightened. Or even in sunlight... if you have +come to the inner darkness you can bring it out. Then a patch of darkness comes before +your eyes. You can go on spreading it. + +Once you know that it can happen, you can have darkness, dark as the darkest night, in +the full sunny day. The sun is there, but you can spread the darkness. The darkness is +always there; even while the sun is there the darkness is there. You cannot see it; it is +covered by the sunlight. Once you know how to uncover it, you can uncover it. + +In Tibet they have many methods just like this. They can bring things from the inner +world to the outer world. You may have heard of one very famous technique; they call it +'heat yoga'. The night is cold, ice-cold, snow is falling, and a Tibetan monk, a Tibetan +lama, can sit under the open sky with snow falling all around, the temperature below +zero, and he can start perspiring. + +This is a medical miracle. How is he perspiring? He is bringing the inner heat out. + +And the inner coolness or inner cold can also be brought out. In Mahavir’s life it is +related.... No one has tried to explain it up to now. Jains think that he was just doing an +austerity; it is not so. It is related that whenever it was summer, the hot season, and the +sun was burning hot, he would always stand somewhere where there was no shade, no +tress, none at all. He would stand in the burning sun in the days of summer, and in winter +he would find a cool place, the coolest — under a tree, a shady tree, or near a river, or just +where the temperature had gone below zero. + +In the cold season he would find a cool place to meditate, and in the hot season he would +find the hottest place to meditate. People thought that he was mad, and his followers +think he was just doing austerities. It is not so. He was really trying some inner +techniques like this. + +When it was hot he was trying to bring his inner cold — and it can be felt only in a +contrast. When it was cold outside he was bringing his inner heat — and it can be felt only +when there is a contrast. He was not a body enemy, he was not against his body, as Jains +think. They think that he was killing his body, because if you can kill your body, you can +kill your desire. This is sheer nonsense. He was doing nothing of the sort. + +He was bringing the inner out, and he was protected by the inner. Just as Tibetan lamas +can create heat and they can perspire while snow is falling, Mahavir would stand under a +hot burning sun and he would not perspire. He was bringing his inner cold, and that inner +cold would come out and protect his body. + +Similarly you can bring your inner darkness, and that feeling is very cool. If you can + + + +bring it, you are protected by it: no excitement, no passion will disturb you. Try it. These +three things: stare in darkness with open eyes and allow the darkness to enter within. +Secondly: feel darkness as a mother's womb all around; live with it; forget yourself more +and more in it. And thirdly: carry a patch of darkness in your heart wherever you go. + +If you can do this, the darkness will become the light. You will be enlightened through +darkness. + +WHEN A MOONLESS RAINY NIGHT IS NOT PRESENT, CLOSE EYES AND FIND +BLACKNESS BEFORE YOU. OPENING EYES, SEE BLACKNESS. + +That's the method. First feel it inside, feel it deeply so you can perceive it out. Then open +the eyes suddenly and feel it out. It will take time. + +SO FAULTS DISAPPEAR FOREVER. + +And if you can bring the inner darkness outside, faults disappear forever, because if the +inner darkness is felt, you have become so pool, so silent, so unexcitable, that faults +cannot remain with you. + + +Remember this: faults can exist only if you are prone to be excited, if you tend to be +excited. They don't exist in themselves; they exist in your capacity to get excited. +Someone insults you, and you have no darkness within to absorb the insult; you become +inflamed, you get angry, you get fiery, and then everything is possible. You can be +violent, you can kill, you can do what only a madman can do. Anything is possible — you +are now mad. Someone praises you: you again go mad to the other extreme. + +All around you there are situations, and you are not capable of absorbing. Insult a +Buddha: he can absorb it, he can simply swallow it, digest it. Who digests that insult? An +inner pool of darkness, silence. You throw anything poisoned; it is absorbed. No reaction +comes out of it. + +Try this, and when someone insults you, just remember that you are filled with darkness, +and suddenly you will feel there is no reaction. You pass through a street; you see a +beautiful woman or a man — you get excited. Feel that you are filled with darkness; +suddenly the passion will disappear. You try it. This is absolutely experimental, there is +no need to believe it. + +When you feel that you are filled with passion or desire or sex, simply remember the +inner darkness. For a single moment close your eyes and feel darkness and see — the +passion has disappeared, the desire is no more there. + +The inner darkness has absorbed it. You have become an infinite vacuum into which +anything can fall and it will not return. You are now like an abyss. + +That's why Shiva says: SO FAULTS DISAPPEAR FOREVER. These techniques appear +so simple — they are. But don’t leave them without trying them because they appear so +simple. They may not challenge your ego, but still try them. It always happens that we +never try simple things, because we think they are so simple they cannot be true. And +truth is always simple, it is never complex. There is no need for it to be complex. Only +lies are complex. They cannot be simple, because if they are simple they will be caught +immediately. + + + +And because something appears simple we think nothing is possible out of it. Not that +nothing is possible out of it, but because our ego gets challenged only when something is +very difficult. Many schools and many systems have simply complicated their methods +because of you. There is no need, but they have to create complexities, unnecessary +hurdles, to make them difficult so that you feel good because your ego is challenged. If +something is very difficult and only few can do it, then you feel, 'Now, this is something +to do, because only a few can do it; rarely can someone do it.’ + +These methods are absolutely simple. Shiva is not taking you into account. He is simply +describing the exact method as it is — as simply as possible, as telegraphically as +possible, only the bare essentials. + +So don’t seek any ego challenge. These techniques are not to send you on an ego trip. +They may not challenge you, but if you can try them, they will transform you. And +challenge is not good, because with challenge you get feverish, you get mad. + +The third technique: + +WHEREVER YOUR ATTENTION ALIGHTS, + +AT THIS VERY POINT, + +EXPERIENCE. + +WHEREVER YOUR ATTENTION ALIGHTS, AT THIS VERY POINT, +EXPERIENCE. What? What experience? In this technique, firstly you have to develop +attention. You have to develop a sort of attentive attitude, only then will this technique +become possible, so then wherever your attention alights you can experience — you can +experience yourself. Just by looking at a flower you can experience yourself. Then +looking at a flower is not looking at the flower only, but at the looker also — but only if +you know the secret of attention. + +You also look at a flower, and you may think you are looking at the flower, but you have +started thinking about the flower, and the flower is missed. You are no more there, you +have gone somewhere else, you have moved away. By attention is meant that when you +are looking at a flower, you are looking at a flower and not doing anything else — as if +the mind has stopped, as if now there is no thinking and only a simple experience of the +flower there. You are here, the flower is there, and between you two there is no thought. + + +Suddenly — if this is possible — suddenly, from the flower your attention will come back, +bounce back to yourself. It will become a circle. You will look at the flower and the look +will come back; the flower will reflect it, rebounce it. If there are no thoughts, this +happens. Then you are not looking at the flower only, you are looking at the looker also. +Then the looker and the flower have become two objects and you have become a witness +of both. + +But first attention has to be trained, because you have no attention at all. Your attention is +just flickering, moving from this to that, from that to something further. Not for a single +moment are you attentive. Even if I am talking here, you never hear all my words. You +hear one word, then your attention goes somewhere else; then you come back, you hear +another, then your attention goes somewhere else. You hear a few words, and you fill the +gaps, and then you think you have heard me. + + + +And whatsoever you carry with yourself, it is your own business, it is your own creation. +Just a few words you have heard from me, and then you have fdled the gaps, and +whatsoever you fill in the gaps changes everything. I say a word, and you have started +thinking about it. You cannot remain silent. If you can remain silent while hearing, you +will become attentive. + +Attention means a silent alertness with no thoughts interfering. + +Develop it. You can develop it only by doing it; there is no other way. Do it more and +you will develop it. Doing anything, being anywhere, try to develop it. + +You are travelling in a car, or in a train. What are you doing there? Try to develop +attention; don’t waste time. For half an hour you will be in a train: develop attention. Just +be there. Don't think. Look at someone, look at the train or look outside, but be the look, +don't think anything. Stop thinking. Be there and look. Your look will become direct, +penetrating, and from everywhere your look will be reflected back and you will become +aware of the looker. + +You are not aware of yourself because there is a wall. When you look at a flower, first +your thoughts change your look; they give their own color. Then that look goes to the +flower. It comes back, but then again your thoughts give it a different color. And when it +comes back it never finds you there. You have moved somewhere else, you are not there. +Every look comes back; everything is reflected, responsed, but you are not there to +receive it. So be there to receive it. The whole day you can try it on many things, and by +and by you will develop attentiveness. With that attentiveness do this: + +WHEREVER YOUR ATTENTION ALIGHTS, + +AT THIS VERY POINT, + +EXPERIENCE. + +Then look anywhere, but simply look. + +The attention has alighted — and you will experience yourself. But the first requirement is +to have the capacity to be attentive. And you can practise it. There is no need for it to +take some extra time. + +Whatsoever you are doing — eating, taking a bath, standing under a shower — just be +attentive. But what is the problem? The problem is that we do everything with the mind, +and we are planning continuously for the future. You may be travelling in a train, but +your mind may be arranging other journeys; programming, planning. Stop this. + +One Zen monk, Bokuju, has said, 'This is the only meditation I know. While I eat, I eat. +While I walk, I walk. And while I feel sleepy, I sleep. Whatsoever happens, happens. I +never interfere.’ + +That’s all there is — don’t interfere. And whatsoever happens, allow it to happen; you be +simply there. That will give you attentiveness. And when you have attention, this +technique is just in your hand. + +WHEREVER YOUR ATTENTION ALIGHTS, + +AT THIS VERY POINT, + +EXPERIENCE. + + +You will experience the experiencer; you will fall back to yourself. From everywhere you + + + +will be rebounded; from everywhere you will be reflected. The whole existence will +become a mirror; you will be reflected everywhere. The whole existence will mirror you, +and only then can you know yourself, never before. + + +Unless the whole existence becomes a mirror for you, unless every part of existence +reveals you, unless every relationship opens you.... You are such an infinite phenomenon +— ordinary mirrors won't do. You are such a vast existence within, that unless the whole +existence becomes a mirror you will not be able to get a glimpse. When the whole +universe becomes a mirror, only then will you be mirrored. In you exists the divine. + +And the technique to make existence a mirror is this: create attention, becomes more +alert, and then wherever your attention alights — wherever, on any object you alight — +suddenly experience yourself. This is possible, but right now impossible, because you +don't fulfill the basic requirement. + +You can look at a flower, but that is not attention. You are just running near the flower, +around and around. You have seen the flower while running; you have not been there for +a single moment. Then the whole life becomes meditative. + +WHEREVER YOUR ATTENTION ALIGHTS, + +AT THIS VERY POINT, + +EXPERIENCE. + +Just remember yourself. + +There is a deep reason because of which this technique can be helpful. You can throw a +ball and hit the wall — the ball will come back. When you look at a flower or at a face, a +certain energy is being thrown — your look is energy. And you are not aware that when +you look, you are investing some energy, you are throwing some energy. + +A certain quantity of your energy, of your life energy, is being thrown. That’s why you +feel exhausted after looking in the street the whole day: people passing, advertisements, +the crowd, the shops. Looking at everything you feel exhausted and then you want to +close your eyes to relax. What has happened? Why are you feeling so exhausted? You +have been throwing energy. + +Buddha and Mahavir both insisted that their monks should not look too much; they must +concentrate on the ground. Buddha says that you can only look up to four feet ahead. +Don't look anywhere. Just look on the path where you are moving. To look four feet +ahead is enough, because when you have moved four feet, again you will be looking four +feet ahead. Don’t look more than that, because you are not to waste energy unnecessarily. +When you look, you are throwing a certain amount of energy. Wait, be silent, allow that +energy to come back. And you will be surprised. If you can allow the energy to come +back, you will never feel exhausted. Do it. Tomorrow morning, try it. Be silent, look at a +thing. Be silent, don't think about it, and wait patiently for a single moment — the energy +will come back; in fact, you may be revitalized. + +People continuously ask me... I go on reading continuously so they ask me, 'Why are +your eyes still okay? You must have needed space long ago.’ + +You can read, but if you are reading silently with no thought, the energy comes back. + +It is never wasted. You never feel tired. My whole life I have been reading twelve hours a + + + +day, sometimes even eighteen hours a day, but I have never felt any tiredness. In my eyes +I have never felt anything, never any tiredness. Without thought the energy comes back; +there is no barrier. And if you are there you reabsorb it, and this reabsorption is +rejuvenating. Rather than your eyes being tired they feel more relaxed, more vital, filled +with more energy. + +THE END. + + + +Chapter 52: Enter this moment + + +Question 1 + +THE OTHER NIGHT YOU SAID THAT PHILOSOPHIES ARE ANTI-MEDITATION. +BUT ON THE OTHER HAND YOU AGREE THAT THE EASTERN PHILOSOPHIES +SUCH AS TANTRA, YOGA AND VEDANT, ARE THE WRITINGS OF +ENLIGHTENED SAGES. WHY DO THE ENLIGHTENED SAGES LEAVE BEHIND +THEM A STRONG STRUCTURE OF PHILOSOPHICAL CONTEMPLATION, IF +PHILOSOPHIES ARE ANTI-MEDITATION? + +Philosophy is not darshan. Darshan is the eastern term. Darshan means perception, +philosophy means thinking. Herman Hesse has coined a new word to translate darshan +into western languages. He calls it 'philosia' — 'sia' from 'to see’. + +Philosophy means to think, and darshan means to see. Both are basically different; not +only different, but diametrically opposite. Because when you are thinking you cannot see. +You are so fdled with thoughts that perception is blurred, perception is clouded. When +thinking ceases, you become capable of seeing. Then your eyes are opened, they become +unclouded. Perception happens only when thinking ceases. + +For Socrates, Plato and Aristotle, and the whole western tradition, thinking is the base. +For Kanad, Kapil, Patanjali, Buddha, and the whole eastern tradition, seeing is the base. +So Buddha is not a philosopher, not at all; neither is Patanjali, nor Kapil or Kanad. They +are not philosophers. They have seen the truth; they have not thought about it. + +Remember well that you only think when you cannot see. + +If you can see, there is no reason to think. Thinking is always in ignorance. Thinking is +not knowledge, because when you know, there is no need to think. When you don't know, +you will the gap by thinking. Thinking is groping in the dark. So eastern philosophies are +not philosophies. To use the word philosophy for eastern darshan is absolutely wrong. +Darshan means to see, to attain the eye, to realize, to know — immediately, directly, +without the mediation of thinking and thought. + +Thinking can never lead to the unknown. How can it lead? It is impossible. The very +process of thinking has to be understood. When you think, what do you really do? You +go on repeating old thoughts, memories. If I ask you a question — does God exist? — you +can think about it. What will you do? All that you have heard, all that you have read, all +that you have accumulated about God, you will repeat. Even if you come to a new +conclusion, the newness of it will only be apparent, not real. It will be simply a +combination of old thoughts. You can combine many old thoughts and create a new +structure, but that structure will be apparently new, not new at all. + +Thinking can never come to any original truth. Thinking is never original; it cannot be. It +is always of the past, of the old, of the known. Thinking cannot touch the unknown; it is +repetitively moving in the circle of the known. You don’t know truth, you don’t know +God. + +What can you do? You can think about it. You will move in circles, around and around. +You can never come to any experience of it. + +So the eastern emphasis is not on thinking, but on seeing. You cannot think about God, +but you can see. You cannot come to any conclusion about God, but you can realize. It + + + +can become an experience. You cannot get to it through information, through knowledge, +through scriptures, through theories and philosophies; no, you cannot get to it. You can +get into it only if you throw all knowledge. All that you have heard and read and +collected, all the dust that your mind has collected, the whole past, must be put aside. +Then your eyes are fresh, then your consciousness is unclouded, and then you can see it. +It is here and now — you are clouded. You have not to go somewhere else to find the +divine or the truth — it is here. It is right there where you are. And it has always been so +— only you are clouded, your eyes are closed. So the question is not to think more; the +question is how to come to a non-thinking consciousness. That's why I say that +meditation and philosophy are anti each other. Philosophy thinks, meditation comes to a +no-thinking consciousness. And eastern philosophies are not really philosophies. In the +West, philosophies exist; in the East, only religious realizations. + +Of course, when a Buddha happens, or a Kanad or a Patanjali happens, when someone +comes to realize the absolute, he makes statements about it. + +Those statements are different from the Aristotelan statements, from western +philosophical conclusions. The difference is this: a Kanad, a Buddha, first comes to +realize — the realization is the first thing — and then he makes statements about it. +Experience is primary, and then he expresses it. Aristotle, Hegel and Kant, they think, +and then through thinking and logical argument and dialectics, they reach particular +conclusions. These conclusions are reached through thinking, through mind, not through +any practice of meditation. Then they make assertions, then they make statements. The +source is different. + +For a Buddha, his statements are only as a vehicle to communicate. He never says that +through his communication you will achieve the truth. If you can understand Buddha, +that doesn't mean you have achieved the truth; that simply means you have gathered +knowledge. You will have to pass through meditations, deep ecstasies, deep pools of the +mind, only then will you come to the truth. + +So truth is reached through a certain existential experience. It is existential, it is not +mental. You must change to know it and to be it. If you remain the same and go on +collecting information, you will become a great scholar, a philosopher, but you will not +be enlightened. You will remain the same man; there will have been no mutation. + +That's why I said that philosophy is one dimension Meditation is quite the contrary, the +very opposite, the polar-opposite dimension. + +So don't think about life; rather, live it in depth. And don’t think about ultimate problems; +rather, enter this very moment in the ultimate. And the ultimate is not in the future. It is +always there, tunelessly there. + +Someone else has also asked a similar question. He has asked: + +Question 2 + +CAN PROBLEMS BE SOLVED THROUGH THINKING? + +Yes, certain problems can be solved through thinking — only those problems which are +created by thinking can be solved by it. But no real problem can be solved by it, no lived +problem can be solved by it. It is not created by it; it is there in life itself. Thinking will +not be of much help. Only in one way can thinking help you, and that is that through +thinking and thinking and thinking, you will stumble upon the truth that thinking is futile. + + + +And the moment you realize that thinking is futile for existential problems, it has helped +you in a way. It is through thinking that you have come to this realization. + +But problems which are created by thinking can be solved by thinking itself. For +example, a mathematical problem: it can be solved by thinking, because the whole +mathematics is created by thinking. For example, if there is no man on earth, will there be +mathematics? There will be no mathematics. With the disappearance of human mind, +mathematics will disappear. There is no mathematics in life and existence. + +In the garden, trees are there, but when you count ONE, TWO, THREE, three trees are +not there, because the THREE is a mental thing. The trees are there, but the figures are +not there. The figure three is in your mind. If you are not there, the trees will be there, but +not three trees, only trees. The THREE is a quality given by the mind, it is a projected +quality. + +Mind creates mathematics, so any problem of mathematics will be solved by mind, it will +be solved by thinking. Remember, you cannot solve a mathematical problem through +non-thinking. No meditation will be of help, because meditation will dissolve the mind, +and with the mind the whole mathematics will dissolve. So there are problems which are +created by the mind; they can be solved. But there are problems which are not created by +the mind, but are existential. Those problems cannot be solved by the mind. You will +have to move deep in existence itself. + +For example, love. It is an existential problem. You cannot solve it by thinking; rather, +you will get more puzzled. The more you think, the less you will be in touch with the +source of the problem. Meditation will be of help. It will give you insight, it will lead you +to the unconscious roots of the problem. If you think about it, you will remain on the +surface. + +So remember, life problems cannot be solved by thinking. On the contrary, really, +because of too much thinking you are missing all solutions, and more problems are +created. + +For example, death. Death is not a problem created by thinking; you cannot solve it by +thinking. Whatsoever you think, how can you solve it? You can console, and you can +think that consolation is a solution — it is not. You can deceive yourself; that's possible +through thinking. You can create explanations, and through explanations you can think +that you have solved it. You can escape the problem through thinking, but you cannot +solve it. And see the distinction clearly. + +For example, death is there. Your beloved dies, or your friend, or your daughter — the +death is there. Now what can you do? You can think about it. You can think and you can +say that the soul is immortal — because you have read it. In the Upanishads it is said that +the soul is immortal, only the body dies. You don’t know it at all, because if you really +know, there is no problem — or is there a problem? If you really know that the soul is +immortal, then death has not occurred; there is no problem at all. But the problem is +there: death has occurred, and you are disturbed and deep in sorrow. Now you want to +escape this sorrow. Now somehow you want to forget this sorrow. + +You can take the explanation that the soul is immortal — now this is a trick. Not that the +soul is not immortal — I am not saying that — but for you this is a trick. You are trying to +deceive yourself. You are in sorrow, and now you want to escape this sorrow, so this +explanation will be helpful. + + + +Now you can console yourself that the soul is immortal, no one dies, only the body — just +as if one changes the clothes, or one changes the abode — so from one house to another +the soul has gone. You can go on thinking, but you don’t know anything about it. You +have heard, you have collected infonnation; but through these explanations you will be at +ease. You can forget the death. + +Really this is no solution to the problem. Nothing has been solved. The next day someone +else will die and the same problem will be there. Again someone will die and the same +problem will be there. And deep down you know that you will have to die. You cannot +escape death — and the fear is there. But you can go on postponing, and you can go on +escaping through explanations. This won’t do. + +Death is an existential problem. You cannot solve it through thinking. You can create +only fake solutions. What to do then? Then there is another dimension — the dimension +of meditation; not of thinking, not of mentation. You just encounter the situation. + +Death has occurred. Your beloved is dead. Don’t move in thinking. Don’t bring the +Upanishads and the Gita and the Bible. Don’t ask the Christs and Buddhas. Leave them +alone. Death is there: face, encounter. Be with this situation totally. Don't think about it. +What can you think? You can only repeat old rubbish. The death is such a new +phenomenon, it is so unknown, that your knowledge is not going to help in any way. + +So put aside your mind. Be in a deep meditation with death. + +Don’t do anything, because what can you do which can be of any help? You don’t know. +So be in ignorance. Don’t bring false knowledge, borrowed knowledge. Death is there; +you be with it. Face death with total presence. Don’t move in thinking, because then you +are escaping from the situation, you are becoming absent from here. Don’t think. Be +present with the death. + +Sadness will be there, sorrow will be there, a heavy burden will be on you — let it be +there. It is part — part of life, and part of maturity, and part of the ultimate realization. +Remain with it, totally present. This will be meditation, and you will come to a deep +understanding of death. Then death itself becomes eternal life. + +But don’t bring the mind and knowledge. Remain with death; then death will reveal itself +to you, then you will know what death is. You will move into the inner mansions of it. +Then death will take you to the very center of life — because death is the very center of +life. It is not against life; it is the very process of life. But mind brings the contradiction +that life and death are opposites. Then you go on thinking, and because the root is false, +the opposition is false, you can never come to any conclusion which can be true and real. +Whenever there is a lived problem, be with the problem without your mind — that's what +I mean by meditation — and just being there with the problem will solve it. + +And if you have really been there, death will not occur to you again, because then you +know what death is. + +We never do this — never with love, never with death, never with anything that is +authentically real. We always move in thoughts, and thoughts are the falsifiers. They are +borrowed, not your own. They cannot liberate you. Only the truth which is your own can +become your liberation. And you can only come to your own truth through a very silent +presence. With any problem, that fails. Thinking will not solve the real problems, but +thinking can solve unreal problems created by thinking itself — because those problems +follow the rules of logic. Life doesn't follow the rules of logic. Life has its own hidden +laws, and you cannot force logic on them. + + + +One point more about this: wherever you bring the mind, the mind dissects, analyzes. +Reality is one, and mind always divides. And when you have dived a reality, you have +falsified it. Now you can struggle for your whole life — nothing will be achieved, because +basically the reality was one and the mind divided into two, and now you are working +with the division. + +For example, as I was saying, life and death are one, but for the mind they are two and +death is the enemy of life. It is not, because life cannot exist without death. If life cannot +exist without death, how can death be the enemy? It is the basic situation. + +It makes life possible. Life grows in it; it is the soul. Without it life is impossible. But +mind, thinking, divides it and puts it as a polar opposite. Then you can go on thinking +about. Whatsoever you think will be false, because in the beginning you have committed +a sin — the sin of division. + +When you meditate, divisions disappear. When you meditate, there cannot be divisions, +because how can you divide in silence? + +We are here. Everyone is thinking in his own mind something or other; then we are +different, everyone is different, because your thought is yours, and my thought is mine. In +my mind I have my own dreams and you have your own. There are many individuals +here, but if we all are meditating — neither you are thinking nor I am thinking, the +thinking has ceased — then there will not be so many individuals. Really, there will not be +individuals at all. If we are all meditating then limitations have disappeared. + +When I am meditating and you are meditating, there are not two persons, there cannot be, +because two silences become one. They cannot be two, because how can you demark one +silence from another silence? You cannot demark. You can demark one thought from +another, one mind from another, but two silences are simply one — just like two zeros. +Two zeros are not two; two zeros are one. You can put a thousand zeros, but they are +one. + +Meditation is creating a zero within — all limitations, all divisions disappear. + +And that gives you the real eye, the third eye, darshan. Now you have the real eyes to see. +For these real eyes reality is clear, open, revealed. And with the reality revealed, there are +no problems. + +Question 3 + +WHAT IS THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN GAZING AT AN OPEN CLEAR SKY, +GAZING AT AN ENLIGHTENED MASTER’S PHOTO, AND GAZING AT THE +DARKNESS? + +The technique of gazing is not concerned really with the object; it is concerned with +gazing itself. Because when you stare without blinking your eyes, you become focused, +and the nature of the mind is to be constantly moving. If you are really gazing, not +moving at all, the mind is bound to be in a difficulty. + +The nature of the mind is to move from one object to another, to move constantly. If you +are gazing at darkness or at light or at something else, if you are really gazing, the +movement of the mind stops. Because if the mind goes on moving, your gaze will not be +there; you will go on missing the object. When the mind has moved somewhere else, you +will forget, you will not be able to remember what you were looking at. The object will +be there physically, but for you it will have disappeared because your are not there; you +have moved in thought. + + + +Gazing means, TRATAK means, not allowing your consciousness to move. And when +you are not allowing the mind to move, in the beginning it struggles, struggles hard, but +if you go on practising gazing, by and by the mind loses struggling. + +For moments it stops. And when mind stops there is no mind, because mind can exist +only in movement, thinking can exist only in movement. When there is no movement, +thinking disappears, you cannot think, because thinking means movement — moving from +one thought to another. It is a process. + +If you gaze continuously at one thing, fully aware and alert... because you can gaze +through dead eyes. Then you can go on thinking — only eyes, dead eyes, not looking at... +just with dead men's eyes you can look, but your mind will be moving. That will not be +of any help. Gazing means not only your eyes, but your total mind focused through the +eyes. + +So whatsoever the object.... It depends: if you like light, it is okay. If you can like +darkness, good. Whatsoever the object, deeply it is irrelevant. The question is to stop the +mind completely in your gaze, to focus it, so the inner movement, the fidgeting, stops; the +inner wavering stops. You are simply looking at, not doing anything. That deep looking +will change you completely. It will become a meditation. + +And it is good; you can try it. But remember that your eyes and your consciousness +should meet in the focusing. You must be really looking through the eyes; you must not +be absent there. Your presence is needed — totally present. Then you cannot think, then +thinking is impossible. There is only one danger: you may become unconscious, you may +fall asleep. + +Even with open eyes it is possible that you may fall asleep. Then your gaze will become +stony. + +In the beginning the first trouble will be that you will be looking at, but you will not be +present. This is the first barrier. Your mind will move. Your eyes will be fixed, your +mind will be moving — there will be no meeting of the eyes and the mind. This will be +the first difficulty. If you win over it, the second difficulty will be that gazing with no +movement, you will fall asleep. You will move into auto-hypnosis, you will be +hypnotized by yourself. That's natural, because our mind knows only two states: either +the constant movement or sleep. The mind knows only two states naturally: constant +movement, thinking, or falling into sleep. And meditation is a third state. + +The third state of meditation means your mind is as silent as a deep sleep, and as alert +and aware as in thinking — both these must be present. You must be alert, completely +alert, and as silent as if deep in sleep. So Patanjali's Yoga Sutras say that meditation is a +sort of deep sleep, with only one difference — that you are alert. Patanjali equates +sushupti and samadhi: deep sleep and ultimate meditation. The difference is only that in +deep sleep you are not aware, and in meditation you are aware, but the quality of both is +deep silence — unrippled, unwavering silence, unmoving silence. + +In the beginning it may happen that through staring you may fall asleep. + +So if you have become capable of bringing your mind to your focus and the mind is not +moving, then remain alert, don’t fall asleep. Because if sleep comes, you have fallen in +the abyss, the ditch. Just between these two ditches — constant thinking and sleep — is the +narrow bridge of being in meditation. + +Question 4 + + + +YOU HAVE SAID THAT SCIENCE EXPERIMENTS WITH THE OBJECTIVE, AND +RELIGION WITH THE SUBJECTIVE. BUT NOW THERE IS A NEW GROWING +SCIENCE, PSYCHOLOGY, OR MORE ACCURATELY, DEPTH PSYCHOLOGY, +WHICH IS BOTH SUBJECTIVE AND OBJECTIVE. SO SCIENCE AND RELIGION +MEET IN DEPTH PSYCHOLOGY. + +They cannot meet. Depth psychology, or the study of psychic phenomena, is again +objective. And the method of depth psychology is the method of objective science. + +Try to see the distinction. For example, you can study meditation in a scientific way. You +can observe someone who is meditating, but then this has become objective for you. You +meditate and I observe. I can bring all the scientific instruments to observe what is +happening to you, what is happening there in you, but the study remains objective. I am +outside. I am not meditating. You are meditating; you are an object to me. + +Then I can try to understand what is happening to you. Even through instruments much +can be known about you, but that will remain objective and scientific. So really, +whatsoever I am studying is not the real thing that is happening to you, but the effects +that your body is recording. + + +You cannot penetrate a Buddha, what is happening to him, because really nothing is +happening there. The deepest center of an enlightened man is nothingness. Nothing is +happening there. And if nothing is happening, how can you study it? You can study +something. You can study the Alpha waves; what is happening to the mind, to the body, +to the chemistry, you can understand. But really deep down, when someone becomes +enlightened, there is not anything happening. All happening has ceased. + +This is what is meant — the world has ceased. Now there is no sansar, no happening. He +is as if he is not. That’s why Buddha says, 'Now I have become a no-atman, no-self. + +There is no one inside me. I am just an emptiness. The flame has disappeared, and the +house is vacant.’ Nothing is happening. What can you record about it? At the most you +can record that nothing is happening. If something happens it can be recorded +objectively. + +The method of science remains objective, and science is very much afraid of the +subjective, for many reasons. Science and the scientific mind cannot believe in the +subjective, because firstly, it is private and individual and no one can enter in it. It cannot +become public and collective, and unless something is public and collective, nothing can +be said about it. The person who is saying may be deceived, or may be deceiving others. +He may be a liar. + +Or, he may be just in an illusion, not a liar. He may be thinking and believing that this +has happened to him, and this may be just a delusion, a self-deception. + +So for science the truth must be objective. Others must be able to participate in it, so we +can judge whether it is happening or not. Secondly, it must be that it can be repeated; it +must be repeatable. If we heat water it evaporates at a certain degree — it must be +repeatable. So we repeat and repeat and again and again it evaporates at a certain degree. +If it evaporates only once at a hundred degrees and never gain, or sometimes at ninety +and sometimes at eighty, it cannot become a scientific fact. It must be repeatable, and the +same conclusion should be achieved through many repeated experiments. + +But the subjective realization is not repeatable — it is not even predictable. And you + + + +cannot invite it; it happens. You cannot force it. You may achieve a deep meditation, you +may have a very elated peak experience, but if someone says, 'Repeat it here,’ you may +not be able to repeat it. On the contrary, because someone says, and you make an effort to +repeat it, this very effort may become the barrier. Even the presence of observers may be +distracting. You may not be able to repeat it. + +Science needs objective, repeatable experiments. And psychology, if it wants to be a +science, must follow scientific rules. + +Religion is subjective. It is not concerned with proving any fact; rather, it is concerned +with coming to an individual experiencing of it. And the deepest must remain individual, +and the ultimate must remain private; it cannot become collective. Because unless +everyone has come to the status of an enlightened one, it cannot become collective. You +have to grow to achieve it. + +So science and religion really cannot meet, because their approaches are different. +Religion is absolutely private — the concern of the individual with himself Because of +this, those countries which in the past have been more religious than others have +remained individualistic. For example, India. India is individualistic. Sometimes it +appears even selfish. Everyone is concerned with himself, his own growth, his own +enlightenment; not concerned with others, indifferent to others, indifferent to society, +social conditions, poverty, slavery. Everyone is concerned with himself, with growing to +the ultimate peak. It also looks selfish. + +Western countries are more socialistic, less individualistic. That’s why the very concept +of communism was impossible with the Indian mind. We have given a Buddha and a +Patanjali, but we couldn’t give a Marx. It had to come from the West where the society, +the collective whole, is more important than the individual; where science is more +important than religion; where that which happens objectively is more important than that +which happens in your absolute privacy. + +That which happens in the privacy is dream-like for the West. + +Look at this: that which happens publicly we have called maya, illusion. Shankara says +the whole world is illusion; only that which happens deep down within you, the ultimate, +the Brahma that happens there is real, and everything is unreal. Quite the opposite is the +western scientific attitude: that which happens within you is illusory; that which happens +outside is the real. The reality is there outside, and the dream-world is there inside. + +These are the two attitudes — so different, the approach so diametrically opposite, that +there can be no meeting. There is no need also. Their dimensions are different, their +spheres are different. They never trespass on each other; there is no conflict at all. And +there need be no conflict. Science works with the objective world, and religion works +with the individual, subjective world. They never cross each other. There cannot be any +conflict. + +And to me, when you are working with the outside world, work with a scientific attitude. +When you are working with yourself, work with a religious attitude. And don’t create any +conflict; there is no need. Don’t bring science for the inner world, and don’t bring religion +for the outer world. + +If you bring religion to the outer world, you will create chaos. In India we have created it +— it is a mess. If you bring a scientific attitude for the inner, you will create madness — +the West has created it. + + + +Now the West is completely neurotic. And both have made the same mistake. Don't +confuse the two, and don't try to bring the outer to the inner, or the inner to the outer. Let +the subjective be subjective and let the objective be the objective. While you move +outwards be scientific and objective, and while you move inwards be religious and +subjective. + +There is no need to create any conflict. There is none. The conflict arises only because +we want to impose one attitude on both realms. We want either to be scientific totally, or +to be religious totally — that's wrong. With the objective, the subjective approach will be +false, dangerous, harmful, and vice versa. + +Question 5 + +YOU HAVE SPOKEN ABOUT SO MANY METHODS AND TECHNIQUES. THE +YEARNING TO SUCCEED IN THEM IS VERY GREAT. HOW CAN WE +OVERCOME OUR GREAT IMPATIENCE? + +Two things to be remembered. One: spirituality cannot be an outcome of desire, because +desire is the root cause of all our anxiety and anguish. And you cannot direct your desires +to the spiritual realm. But it happens, it is natural, because we know only one movement +— that is desire. We desire the things of the world. Someone desires riches, someone +desires fame, someone desires prestige and power, or something else. We desire things of +the world, and through this desiring we are frustrated. + +And we are bound to be frustrated — it is irrelevant whether a desire is fulfilled or not. + +If it is not fulfilled, obviously we will be frustrated. If it is fulfilled, then too we will be +frustrated, because whenever a desire is fulfilled, the desire is fulfilled, but the hope, the +promise, is not fulfilled. You can get as much wealth as you desire, but the wealth was +not desired really; something else was desired through it — that is never fulfilled. + +You can achieve wealth, but the hope that was lingering around — the dream of +happiness, of bliss, of some ecstatic life — that is not fulfilled. If wealth is not achieved +you will feel frustrated. If wealth is achieved then too you will feel frustrated, because +the promise is not fulfilled, the dream is not fulfilled. Everything is there. The means are +there, and the end has escaped. The end is always elusive. + +Through desire one comes to deep frustration. When this frustration happens you start +looking for something absolutely other than this world — religious yearning is born, a +religious longing, but again you start desiring. You become impatient; you want to +achieve this and that. The mind has not changed. The object of desire is different: it was +wealth, now it is meditation. It was power and prestige, now it is silence and peace. +Before it was something, now it is something else. But the mind, the mechanism, the very +working of your being, is the same. You were desiring A, now you are desiring B — but +the desiring is there. + + +And desiring is the problem, not what you desire; that is not the problem. What you +desire is not the problem — that you desire is the problem. Now you are again desiring +and you will be frustrated again. If you achieve, you will be frustrated. If you don’t +achieve, you will be frustrated. The same will happen to you, because you have not been +able to see the point, you have missed the point. + +You cannot desire meditation, because meditation happens only when there is no desire. +You cannot desire liberation, nirvana, because it happens only in a desire less state. It + + + +cannot be made an object of desire. So to me, and to all those who know, desiring is the +world; not that you desire worldly things. Desiring, the very phenomenon of desiring, is +the world. + +And when you desire, impatience is bound to be there, because the mind doesn’t want to +wait, the mind doesn’t want to postpone. It is impatient. Impatience is the shadow of +desire. The more intense the desire, the more impatience will be there. And impatience +will create disturbance. So how will you achieve meditation? Desire will create +movement of the mind, and then desiring will create impatience, and impatience will +bring you to more disturbances. + +So it happens, and I observe it daily, that a person who was living a very worldly life was +not ordinarily so disturbed. When he starts to meditate, or to seek the religious +dimension, he becomes more disturbed, more than ever. + +The reason is that now he has an even keener desire, more impatience. And with the +worldly things, things were so real and objective that he could wait for them. They were +always in his reach. Now in the spiritual realm things are so elusive, so far away, they +never seem to be in reach. Life seems to be very short, and now the object of desires +seems to be infinite — there is more impatience and then more disturbance. And with a +disturbed mind, how can you meditate? + +So this is the puzzle. Try to understand it. If you are really frustrated and you have come +to feel that all that is outside is futile — money or sex or power or prestige just futile — if +you have come to this realization, then a deeper realization is also needed. If these things +are futile, then desiring is even more futile: you desire and desire and nothing happens — +and your desiring creates the misery. + +Look at the fact that desiring creates misery. If you don’t desire, there is no misery. So +drop desiring. And don't create a new desire; simply drop desiring. Don't create a +spiritual desire. Don't say, 'Now I am going to seek God. Now I am going to find this and +that. Now I am going to realize the truth.’ Don’t create a new desire. If you create, it +shows you have not understood your misery. + +Look at the misery that desire creates. Feel that desire is misery and drop it. No effort is +needed to drop it. + +Remember, if you make an effort you will create another desire. That’s why you need +some other desire, because then you can leave it. If some other desire is there, you can +hang onto it. You can cling to the new desire and you can leave the old one. To leave the +old is easy if some new is to be gained, but then you are missing the whole point. Simply +leave desire because it is misery, and don't create a new desire. + +Then there will be no impatience. Then meditation is not be practised really; it will start +happening to you, because a non-desiring mind is in meditation. Then you can play with +these techniques. And I say play. Then you can play with these techniques; there is no +practice. Practice is not a good word the very word is wrong. Then you can play with +these techniques, and you can enjoy playing, because there is no desire to achieve +something and there is no impatience to reach somewhere. + +You can play, and through play, when meditation is a play, everything is possible. And +everything is possible immediately, because you are not disturbed, you are not impatient, +you are not in any hurry, you are not going somewhere, not reaching somewhere. You are +here and now. If meditation happens, okay. If it doesn't happen, it is still okay. Nothing is +wrong with you because there is no desire, no expectation, no future. + + + +And remember, when meditation or no-meditation are similar to you, meditation has +happened to you. + +You have reached. Now the goal has come, the ultimate has descended in you. This will +look strange — that I say don’t make meditation a practice, rather make it a play, a fun. +Enjoy it while doing it, not for any result. + +But our minds are very serious, deadly serious. Even if we play, we make it a serious +thing. We make it a work, a duty. Play just like small children. Play with meditation +techniques, and then much more is possible through them. Don't be serious about them; +take them as fun. But we make everything serious. Even if we are playing, we make it +serious. And with religion we have always been very serious. Religion has never been +fun, that's why the earth has remained irreligious. Religion must become a fun and a +festivity,, a celebration — a celebration of the moment, enjoying whatsoever you are +doing; enjoying so much and so deeply that mind ceases. + +If you really understand me, these 112 techniques will show you that everything can +become a technique — if you really understand. That's why there are 112. Everything can +become a technique if you understand the quality of the mind which brings meditation. +Then whatsoever you do can become a technique. Be playful, celebrate it, enjoy it. Move +so deeply in it that time ceases. + +But time cannot cease if desire is there. Really, desire is time. When you desire, future is +needed, because desire cannot be fulfdled here and now. + +Desire can be fulfdled only in the future somewhere, so you will need future to move. +And then time destroys you. You miss eternity. Eternity is here. + +So take meditation as a fun, a festivity, a celebration of anything. You are just digging +outside in the garden — it can become a technique. Simply dig and enjoy and celebrate +the very act. Become the act and forget the actor. The 'I' is not there, only the action +remains, and you are present to the action, blissfully present. Then ecstasy is there — no +impatience, no desire, and no motivation. + +If you bring motivation, desire and impatience to meditation, you will destroy the whole +thing. And then the more you do, the more frustrated you will feel. You will say, 'I am +doing so much and nothing is happening.' People come to me. They say, 'I am doing this +and I am doing that, and for so many months and for so many years, and nothing has +happened.’ + +One seeker from Holland was here, and he was doing a particular technique three +hundred times every day. So he told me, 'For two years I have been doing this technique +three hundred times every day. Not a single day has been missed. I have left everything, +because I have to do this three hundred times every day — and nothing has happened.’ +And he was just on the verge of a nervous breakdown, because of the technique. + +So I said, 'The first thing is to leave this. + +Do anything whatsoever, but don't do this. You will go mad.' He was deadly serious +about it. It was a life-and-death problem for him. It had to be achieved. + +And he said, 'Who knows how many days are left? Time is short, and I must achieve it in +this life. I don’t want to be born again. Life is much a misery.’ + +He will be bom again and again. The way he is doing, he will go more and more mad. + +But it is wrong — the whole attitude is wrong. Take meditation as a play, a fun, enjoy it, +and then the very quality changes. Then it is not something you are doing as a cause to + + + +gain some effect. No, you are enjoying it here and now. It is the cause and it is the effect, +both. It is the beginning and it is the end. + +And then you cannot miss meditation. You cannot miss it, it will happen to you, because +now you are ready to take it in. You are open. No one has said that meditation should be +taken as a fun, but I say it. Make it a play. Just like small children, play with it. + +Question 6 + +THE OTHER DAY YOU SAID THAT DARKNESS IS MORE FUNDAMENTAL TO +EXISTENCE, WHILE MOST RELIGIONS HOLD THE CONTRARY VIEW. WILL +YOU KINDLY SHED SOME MORE LIGHT ON THIS QUESTION, PARTICULARLY +IN VIEW OF WHAT MODERN SCIENCE HAS TO SAY ABOUT IT? DOES IT NOT +SAY THAT THE LAST DIVISIBLE COMPONENTS OF MATTER ARE JUST +ELECTRIC ENERGY? + +Again the same division — light and darkness. + +They are two if you look at them through the mind. They are one if you meditate upon +them. Whether you meditate on light or on darkness, it makes no difference. If you +meditate, the other is dissolved into it. Then light is nothing but less darkness and +darkness is nothing but less light; the difference is of degree. They are not two things +opposed to each other; rather, two degrees of one phenomenon. And that one +phenomenon is neither light nor darkness. That one of which these two are degrees is +neither light nor darkness; or, it is both. You can enter into it from light, you can enter +into it from darkness. + +Many religions have used light because it is more comfortable, easier. Darkness is +difficult, more uncomfortable, and if you try to enter through darkness, you have chosen +a more arduous path. That’s why many religions have chosen light. But you can choose +either; it depends on you. If you are adventurous, courageous, choose darkness. If you are +afraid, and don’t want to go on an arduous path, choose light. Because both belong to one +phenomenon which appears at one point as light, at another point as darkness. + +For example, this room is filled with light. But it is not filled with the same light for +everyone, or is it? If my eyes are weak then the light is not as light as it is for you. I see it +as a little darker. Imagine if someone from Mars or from some other planet comes, who +has very penetrating eyes. + +Then where you see light, he will see much light, more light then you see. And where +you see darkness, he will see light. There are animals and birds who see in the night +where you cannot see. For them it is light, for you it is darkness. + +So what is light? And what is darkness? — one phenomenon. And how much you can +penetrate into it, and how much it can penetrate into you... it depends on that penetration +whether you call it light or darkness. These polar opposites just appear to be opposites. +They are not, they are relative degrees of one phenomenon. So scientists say that the last +divisible components of matter are just electric energy. But they don’t say they are light; +they say electric energy. Darkness is also electric energy, and light is also electric energy. +Electric energy is not synonymous with light. If you give it the name electric energy, then +light is one expression and darkness is another. + +But there is no need to move into scientific discussion about it. It is useless. Rather, think +about your own mind, what you like. If you feel at ease with light, enter through light. +That is your door. If you feel at ease with darkness, enter through darkness. And both + + + +will lead to the same. + +Many methods in these 112 are concerned with light; a few are concerned with darkness. +And Shiva is trying to explain all the methods possible. He is not talking to particular +types; he is talking to all types. + +But there are a few persons who will like to enter through darkness. For example, a +feminine mind, more passive, more receptive, will like to enter through darkness; it will +be more acceptable. A male mind will like the light more. + +You may not have observed the fact that many poets of the past and the present, many +philosophers, and many others who have a deep insight into the human mind, have +always compared the female with darkness, and the male with light. Light is aggressive, a +male element; darkness is receptive, a female element. Darkness is like a womb. + +So it depends: if you like darkness, good, enter through it. If you like light, enter through +it. Sometimes even the opposite becomes appealing. You can try that also. There is no +danger in trying anything, because every path leads to the same goal. + +But don’t go on thinking about what to choose. Don't waste time; rather, try. Because you +can go on thinking forever about what will be suitable, what to do and what not to do, +and why so many religions have insisted on light, and so few on darkness. Don’t get +worried about these things; they don’t help. Rather, you think about your own type, about +what will be suitable for you, in what you will feel more comfortable, and then start it. +And then forget all others, because all of these 112 methods are not for you. Even if you +choose one method, for you it is enough. + +You need not go through 1 12 methods; one method will do. So just be receptive and +aware so that you can catch the method that is for you. Y ou need not get worried about +every other method; that is unnecessary. Choose one, play with it, and if you feel good +and something is happening, then move into it and forget all the other 1 1 1 . If you feel +you have chosen wrongly, then throw it, choose another, and play with it. If you try this +with four or five or six methods, you will fall upon the right one. But don’t be serious — +just play. + + +THE END. + + + +Chapter 53: From death to deathlessness + + +FOCUS ON FIRE + +RISING THROUGH YOUR FORM + +FROM THE TOES UP + +UNTIL THE BODY BURNS TO ASHES + +BUT NOT YOU. + +MEDITATE ON THE MAKE-BELIEVE WORLD AS BURNING TO ASHES AND +BECOME BEING ABOVE HUMANAS, + +AS SUBJECTIVELY, + +LETTERS FLOW INTO WORDS AND WORDS INTO SENTENCES, + +AND AS, OBJECTIVELY, + +CIRCLES FLOW INTO WORLDS AND WORLDS INTO PRINCIPLES, + +FIND AT LAST THESE CONVERGING IN OUR BEING + +All the enlightened ones, all the religions, agree on one thing only. Their disagreements +are many, but there is one agreement amongst all, and that is that man, because of his +ego, is closed to the reality. The ego is the only barrier; the feeling that I AM. + +On this point Buddhas and Christs and Krishnas all agree. And because they all agree it +seems to me that this is the basic thing in all religious endeavor. All else is accidental; +this is essential — that you are debarred because of your own ego. + +What is this ego? Of what does it consist? How does it arise? And why does it become so +important? + +Look at your mind — because you cannot understand the phenomenon of ego +theoretically; you can only understand it existentially. Look at your mind, observe it, and +you will come to a deep understanding. And if you can understand what the go is, there is +no problem; it can be dropped easily. + +Rather, there is no need to drop it. If you can understand it, the very understanding +becomes the dropping, because the ego is created through your non-understanding, it is +created through your sleepiness. + +If you become alert about it, if you focus your consciousness towards it, it disappears. It +disappears — just as when you bring light in a room and the darkness disappears. Even if +you bring light to look at darkness, to see what darkness is... if you bring light it +disappears. The ego exists because you have never been alert to your existence; it is a +shadow of your non-alertness. So really, there is no need to drop it. If you can look at it, +it drops by itself. + +What is it? Have you ever felt any moment when there is no ego? Whenever you are +silent, the ego is not. Whenever your mind is in turmoil, chattering, restless, the ego is +there. Whenever you are relaxed, silent and calm, the ego is not. Just now, if you are +silent, where is the ego? You will be there, but no feeling of T. So try to understand it +existentially. + +Right now as I am speaking, you can observe the fact that if you are silent, totally alert, +you are there, but with no feeling of T. And just the contrary happen: if you are troubled, +in conflict, in anxiety, you feel a centered ego within you. When you are in anger, in + + + +passion, violent, aggressive, you feel a crystallized ego within you. + + +Whenever you are in love, in compassion, it is not there. + +That's why we cannot love, because with the ego, love is impossible. That’s why we go +on talking so much about love, but we never are in love. And whatsoever we call love is +more or less sex, it is not love; because you cannot lose your ego, and love cannot exist +unless the ego has disappeared. Love, meditation, God, they all require one thing — the +ego must not be there. That's why Jesus is right in saying that God is love, because both +phenomena happen only when the ego is not. + +If you know love, there is no need to know God — you have known him already. Love is +just another name for it. If you know love, there is no need to go into meditation — you +have gone already. Love is just another name for it. So many techniques of meditation are +needed, and so many teachers, and so many schools of meditation are needed, because +there is no love. If love exists, there is no need to practice anything, because the thing has +happened already. And the thing is the disappearance of the ego. + +So the first thing to be understood: whenever you are silent, the ego is not. And don't +believe in me. I am not talking about a theory; this is a fact. You need not take my +opinion; you can observe it in yourself. And there is no need to postpone it for the future; +right now you can observe the fact that if you are silent, you are — but with no limitation, +with no center. + +You exist without the center, there is no crystallized I. The presence is there, the +consciousness is there, but there is no one who can say 'I am’. + +When you are silent, the ego is not. And when you are not silent, the ego is. So ego is the +disease, all diseases combined together, hence the emphasis to surrender the ego. The +emphasis is to surrender the disease. + +Secondly: if in silence, for even a single moment you have the glimpse of your existence +as egoless, then you can analyze it, and then you can enter the phenomenon of ego, of +what it is. Thew mind is accumulated past. The mind is never here, it is never now. It is +always from the past. It is accumulation. Mind is memory: all the experiences that you +have gone through, all the information that you have come across, all the knowledge that +you have gathered, heard, listened to, read — that is accumulated. The mind is constantly +accumulating. + +The mind is the greatest accumulator; it goes on accumulating. Even while you are not +conscious it goes on accumulating; even while you are asleep the mind is accumulating. +You may not be aware of it. While you are asleep, and there is noise in the road, the mind +is accumulating. You can be hypnotized in the morning and you can be asked about it, +and you will say everything, you will relate everything — whatsoever the mind has +accumulated in the night. Even if you have fallen in a coma, or you are unconscious, or +you have fallen in a fit, the mind is accumulating. + + +The mind doesn't need your consciousness to accumulate; it goes on accumulating. Even +while you were in the womb of your mother the mind was accumulating. And through +hypnosis the memories of your days in the womb of your mother can be awakened. You +don’t remember anything about taking birth, but the mind was accumulating. Whatsoever +was happening, the mind was accumulating. And now it can be awakened again. Through +hypnosis the memory can be brought again to your focus. And millions of memories are + + + +being accumulated — this accumulation is the mind. Memory is the mind. + +How is the I, the ego, created? The consciousness is within you, and around the +consciousness all these memories are accumulated on the periphery. They are useful, and +you cannot survive without them, they are needed, but then a new thing happens between +these two, an epi-phenomenon. + +Consciousness is within, you are within, without the I. There is no I within. You are, +without a center. On the periphery, every moment knowledge, experience, memories, +accumulate. This is the mind. And whenever you look at the world, you look through the +mind. Whenever you pass through a new experience, you look through the memories, you +interpret it through the memories. You look at everything through the past. The past +becomes a mediator. + +Constantly looking through the past, you get identified with it — that identification is the +ego. + +Let me put it in this way: the identification of the conscious with the memories is the ego. +You say 'I am a Hindu' or 'I am a Christian’ or 'I am a Jain’. What are you doing? No one +is born as a Christian, or a Hindu, or a Jain. You are simply born as a human being. Then +you are taught, then you are conditioned to think that you are a Christian, a Hindu, or a +Jain. This is a memory. You have been taught that you are a Christian. This is a memory, +and now, whenever you look through this memory, you feel, 'I am a Christian.’ + +Your consciousness is not Christian; it cannot be. It is simply consciousness. You have +been taught that you are a Christian. This teaching is accumulated on the periphery. Now +you look through the glasses and the whole world is colored. Those glasses stick too +much and too deeply with you, and you are never away from them, you never put them +aside. You have become so accustomed to them that you have forgotten that there are +spectacles on your eyes. Then you say, 'I am a Christian.’ + +Whenever you get identified with any memory, any knowledge, any experience, any +name and fonn, that I is bom. Then you are young, you are old; you are rich, you are +poor; you are beautiful or you are not beautiful; you are educated or you are not +educated; you are respected or you are not respected — then you go on getting identified +with things which accumulate around you and the ego is born. + +Ego is identification with the mind. + +That’s why when you are silent the ego is not, because when you are silent the mind is +not functioning. That’s what silence means. Whenever the mind is functioning you are not +silent. You cannot be — the functioning of the mind is the inner noise, the chattering, the +constant chattering within you. When the chattering stops, or it is not there, or you have +gone beyond it, or you have gone within, moved within, there is silence, and in that +silence there is no ego. + +But it happens only sometimes, and only for a moment, that you are silent. That’s why +you feel that those situations in which this happens are lovely. You start desiring those +situations. You go to a hill, and while the sun is rising in the morning you look at it. +Suddenly you have an upsurge of joy. You feel blissful, a beatitude descends upon you. +What has happened really? Because of the silent morning, and the silent rising of the sun, +and the greenery, and the hill, suddenly your inner chattering has stopped. The +phenomenon is so great — all around you such beauty, such peace and tranquility — that +you have stopped for a moment. In that stopping you have realized a non-ego state — for +a single moment of course. + + + +This can happen through many situations. In sex it happens, in music it can happen; in +anything which is so great that you are overwhelmed, overpowered, and your constant +chattering is put aside, forced aside for a moment, it will come again. + +Whenever you are egoless, accidentally or through some practice, you feel a subtle bliss +which you have not felt before. + +The bliss is not coming from outside. It is not coming from the hills or from the rising +sun or from beautiful flowers; it is not coming from the sex act. It is not coming from +outside. The outside is only creating an opportunity — it is coming from inside. So if you +repeat the outer situation again and again, it will not come, because you will get immune +to it, you will get accustomed to it. + +The same hill and the same morning... again you go there and you don’t feel. You feel +something is missing. Because for the first time it was so new that it stopped your mind +completely. The wonder was so great and the miracle was so new, you couldn't continue +with the past chattering. It stopped — just in awe it stopped — but next time you go there +you know everything. There is no awe, no mystery — the mind continues. This happens +with every experience. In any experience, if you feel a joy, it will be destroyed if you +repeat it, because then, in a repeated experience, you cannot put aside the mind. + +So the second thing to remember is that mind is accumulation. Your consciousness is just +hidden behind this accumulated past, and you are identified with it. Whenever you say 'I +am this, I am that’, you are creating the ego. + +Thirdly: if you can understand this, then the third point is not difficult, and that third +point is that mind has to be used. + +There is no need to get identified; you can use it as an instrument — and it is an +instrument. There is no need to get identified with it. Remain always above it. + +And really, you are always above it, because you are here, now, always present, and mind +is always past. You are always ahead of it. It is just lagging behind you; it is a shadow. +This very moment is a new thing; your mind cannot have it. A moment later it will be +absorbed in the memory; then the mind can have it. Every single moment you are free. +That’s why Buddha has emphasized the moment so much. He says, 'Remain in the +moment and there will be no mind.’ But the moment is very atomic, it is very subtle; you +can miss it easily. The mind is always the past — whatsoever you have known — and the +reality that is passing just now is not part of the mind. It will become part of the mind a +moment later. + +If you can be aware of the reality here and now, you will remain always transcendental to +the mind. And if you can remain transcendental to the mind — always above, never +entangled in it, using it, but never getting involved in it, using it as an instrument, never +getting identified with it — the ego will disappear. You will be egoless, and when you are +egoless, nothing else is to be done. Then all else happens to you. You have become +vulnerable, you have become open. Then the whole existence happens to you, then all the +ecstasies are yours, then suffering is impossible. + +Suffering comes through the ego. Bliss comes through the egoless gate. + +Now we will enter the techniques — because these techniques are concerned with being +egoless. Very simple techniques, but if you understand this background then you can do +them, and much becomes possible through them. + + + +The first technique: + + +FOCUS ON FIRE + +RISING THROUGH YOUR FORM + +FROM THE TOES UP + +UNTIL THE BODY BURNS TO ASHES + +BUT NOT YOU. + +FOCUS ON FIRE RISING THROUGH YOUR FORM, FROM THE TOES UP, UNTIL +THE BODY BURNS TO ASHES BUT NOT YOU. A very simple technique and very +wonderful, very easy to do, but some basic requirements are to be fulfilled beforehand. +Buddha liked this technique very much; he initiated his disciples into this technique. +Whenever someone was initiated by Buddha, the first thing was this: he would tell him +just to go to the burning place and observe a body being burned, a dead body being +burned. For three months he was not to do anything, but just sit there and watch. So the +seeker would go to the burning place of the village. He would stay there for three months, +day and night, and whenever a dead body would come there he would just sit and +meditate. He would just look at the dead body; then the fire would be created and then +the body would start burning. And for three months continuously he would not do +anything else — just look at dead bodies being burned. + + +Buddha said, 'Don't think about it. Just look at it." And it is difficult not to come upon the +thought that sooner or later your body is going to be burned. Three months is a long time, +and continuously, day and night, whenever there was a body to be burned, the seeker was +to meditate. Sooner or later he would start seeing his own body on the burning pyre. He +would start seeing himself being burned. + +It will be helpful; if you want to do this technique, go to the burning place. Watch — not +for three months — but at least watch one body being burned; observe it. Then you can do +this technique easily with yourself. Don’t think: simply watch the phenomenon, watch +what is happening. + +People go to burn their relatives’ bodies, but they never watch. They start talking of other +things, or about death; they argue and discuss. They do many things. They talk many +things and gossip, but they never watch. It should be made a meditation. No talking +should be allowed there, because it is a rare experience to see someone you loved being +burned. You are bound to feel that you are also burning there. If you are seeing your +mother being burned, or your father, or your wife, or your husband, you are bound to see +yourself also there in the flames. That experience will help for this technique. The first +thing. The second thing: if you are very much afraid of death you cannot do this +technique, because the very fear will protect you. + +You cannot enter into it. Or, you can just imagine on the surface, but your deep being +will not be in it. Then nothing will happen to you. So remember, the second thing: +whether you are afraid or not, death is the only certainty. + +It makes no difference whether you are afraid or not; it is irrelevant. In life, nothing is +certain except death. Everything is uncertain; only death is not accidental. And look at +the human mind. We always talk about death as if it is an accident. Whenever someone + + + +dies we say his death was untimely. Whenever someone dies we start talking as if it has +been an accident. Only death is not an accident — only death. Everything else is +accidental. Death is absolutely certain. You have to die. + +And when I say you have to die, it seems in the future, very far away. It is not so — you +have already died. The moment you were born, you died. With birth, death has become a +fixed phenomenon. One part of it has already happened — the birth; now only the second, +later part has to happen. So you are already dead, half-dead, because once one is bom, +one has come into the realm of death, entered into it. Now nothing can change it, now +there is no way to change it. You have entered into it. You are half-dead with birth. +Secondly: death is not going to happen in the end; it is already happening. It is a process. +Just as life is a process, death is a process. + +We create the n — but life and death are just like your two feet, your two legs. Life and +death are both one process. You are dying every moment. + +Let me put it in this way: whenever you inhale, it is life, and whenever you exhale, it is +death. The first thing a child does is to inhale. A child cannot exhale. The first thing is +inhalation. He cannot exhale, because there is no air within his chest; he has to inhale. + +The first act is inhalation. And the old man, while dying, will do the last act, which will +be exhalation. Dying, you cannot inhale — or can you? When you are dying, you cannot +inhale. The last act cannot be inhalation; the last act will be exhalation. The first act is +inhalation and the last is exhalation. Inhalation is birth and exhalation is death. But every +moment you are doing both — inhaling, exhaling. Inhalation is life, exhalation is death. +You may not have observed, but try to observe it. Whenever you exhale, you are more at +peace. Exhale deeply and you will feel a certain peace within. Whenever you inhale, you +become intense, you become tense. The very intensity of inhalation creates a tension. + +And the normal, ordinary emphasis is always on inhalation. If I tell you to take deep +breaths, you will always start with inhalation. + +Really, we are afraid of exhaling. That's why breathing has become shallow. You never +exhale, you go on inhaling. + +Only the body goes on exhaling, because the body cannot exist with inhalation alone. It +needs both: life and death. + +Try one experiment. The whole day, whenever you remember, exhale deeply and don’t +inhale. Allow the body to inhale; you simply exhale deeply. And you will feel a deep +peace, because death is peace, death is silence. And if you can pay attention, more +attention, to exhalation, you will feel egoless. With inhalation you will feel more egoistic; +with exhalation you will feel more egoless. Pay more attention to exhalation. The whole +day, whenever you remember, exhale deeply and don’t inhale. Allow the body to inhale; +you don’t do anything. + +This emphasis on exhalation will help you very much to do this experiment, because you +will be ready to die. A readiness is needed, otherwise the technique will not be of much +help. And you can be ready only if you have tasted death in a certain way. Exhale deeply +and you will have a taste of it. It is beautiful. + +Death is just beautiful, because nothing is like death — so silent, so relaxing, so calm, so +unperturbed. But we are afraid of death. And why are we afraid of death? Why is there so +much fear of death? We are afraid of death not because of death — because we don't +know it. How can you be afraid of something you have never encountered? How can you +be afraid of something that you don't know? At least you must know it to be afraid of it. + + + +So really you are not afraid of death; the fear is something else. You have never really +lived — that creates the fear of death. + +The fear comes because you are not living, so you are afraid — 'I have not lived yet, and +if death happens then what? Unfulfilled, unlived, I will die.’ The fear of death comes only +to those who are not really alive. If you are alive, you will welcome death. Then there is +no fear. You have known life; now you would like to know death also. But we are so +afraid of life itself that we have not know it, we have not entered deep into it. That +creates the fear of death. + +If you want to enter this technique you must be aware of this deep fear. And this deep +fear must be thrown away, purged, only then can you enter the technique. This will help: +pay more attention to exhalation. And really, if you can pay all attention to exhalation +and forget inhaling.... Don’t be afraid that you will die; you will not die — the body will +take inhalation by itself. The body has its own wisdom: if you deeply exhale, the body +will take a deep inhalation by itself. You need not interfere. Then a very deep relaxation +will spread all over your consciousness. The whole day you will feel relaxed, and an +inner silence will be created. + +You can deepen this feeling more if you do another experiment. Just for fifteen minutes +in the day exhale deeply. Sit in a chair or on the ground, exhale deeply, and while +exhaling close the eyes. + +When the air goes out, you go in. And then allow the body to inhale, and when the air +goes in, open the eyes and you go out. It is just the opposite: when the air goes out, you +go in; when the air goes in, you go out. + +When you exhale, space is created within, because breath is life. When you exhale +deeply, you are vacant, life has gone out. In a way you are dead, for a moment you are +dead. In that silence of death, enter within. Air is moving out: you close your eyes and +move within. The space is there and you can move easily. + +Remember, when you are inhaling, to move inwards is very difficult, because there is no +space to move. While exhaling you can move within. And when the air goes in, you go +out; open the eyes and move out. Create a rhythm between these two. Within fifteen +minutes you will feel so deeply relaxed, and you will be ready to do this technique. + +Before doing this technique, do this for fifteen minutes so that you are ready — not only +ready, but welcoming, receptive. The fear of death is not there, because now death +appears like relaxation, death appears like a deep rest. Death appears not antagonistic to +life, but the very source of it, the very energy of it. Life is just like ripples on the face of a +lake, and death is the lake itself. When ripples are not there the lake is there. And the lake +can exist without the ripples, but the ripples cannot exist without the lake. + +Life cannot exist without death. Death can exist without life, because it is the source. +Then you can do this technique. + +FOCUS ON FIRE + +RISING THROUGH YOUR FORM + +FROM THE TOES UP... + +Just lie down. First conceive of yourself as dead; the body is just like a corpse. Lie down, +and then bring your attention to the toes. With closed eyes move inwards. Bring your +attention to the toes and feel that the fire is rising from there upwards, everything is being + + + +burned. As the fire rises, your body is disappearing. Start from the toes and move +upwards. + +Why start from the toes? It will be easier, because the toes are very far away from your I, +from your ego. Your ego exists in the head. You cannot start from the head, it will be +very difficult, so start from the far away point. The toes are the most far away point from +the ego. Start the fire from there. Feel that the toes are burned, only ashes remain, and +then move slowly, burning everything that the fire comes across. Every part — the legs, +the thighs — will disappear. + +And just go on seeing that they have become ashes. The fire is rising upwards, and the +parts it has passed are no more there; they have become ashes. Go on upwards, and lastly +the head disappears. Everything has become... the dust has fallen unto dust... UNTIL +THE BODY BURNS TO ASHES BUT NOT YOU. + +You will remain just a watcher on the hill. + +The body will be there — dead, burned, ashes — and you will be the watcher, you will be +the witness. This witness has no ego. + +This technique is very good to reach the egoless state. Why? — because so many things +are implied in it. It appears simple; it is not so simple. The inner mechanism is very +complex. First thing: your memories are part of the body. Memory is matter; that's why it +can be recorded. It is recorded in the brain cells. They are material, part of the body. + +Your brain cells can be operated on, and if certain brain cells are removed, certain +memories will disappear from you. Memories are recorded in the brain cells. Memory is +matter; it can destroyed. And now scientists say it can be replanted, it can be transplanted +again. + +Sooner or later we will find ways so that when a person like Albert Einstein dies we will +be able to save his brain cells. And those brain cells will be able to be transplanted into a +child, and that child will have all the memories of Albert Einstein without going through +all those experiences. It is part of the body, memory is part of the body, and if the whole +body is burned and has become ashes, you will not have any memory. + +Remember, this is the point to understand: if the memory is still there, then the body +remains and you have been playing tricks. If really you go deep in the feeling that the +body is dead, burning, and the fire has completely destroyed it, you will not have any +memory in that moment. + +In that moment of watching, there will be no mind. Everything will have stopped — no +movement of thought, just watching, just seeing what has happened. + +And once you know this, you can remain in this state continuously. Once you have +known that you can separate yourself from the body.... This technique is just a method to +separate yourself from the body, just to create a gap between you and the body, just for a +few moments to be out of the body. If you can do this, then you can remain in the body +and you will not be in the body. You can go on living as you were living before, but you +will not be the same again. + +This technique will take at least three months. Go on doing it. It is not going to happen in +one day, but if you go on doing it every day for one hour, within three months, some day +suddenly your imagination will have helped and the gap will be created, and you will +actually see the body gone to ashes. Then you can watch. + +In that watching you will realize a deep phenomenon — that the ego is a false entity. It +was there because you were identified with the body, with the thoughts, with the mind. + + + +You are neither — neither the mind nor the body. You are different from all that +surrounds you; you are different from your periphery. + +Apparently the technique seems simple, but it can bring you a deep mutation. But first go +and meditate on the burning ghat, on the burning ground, so you can see how the body +bums, how the body turns to dust again — so you can imagine easily. + +Then start from the toes and move very slowly. And before doing this technique, pay +more attention to exhalation. Right before entering the technique, for fifteen minutes +exhale and close the eyes; allow the body to inhale and open the eyes. For fifteen minutes +feel a deep relaxation and then enter into it. + +The second technique: + +MEDITATE ON THE MAKE-BELIEVE WORLD AS BURNING TO ASHES, AND +BECOME BEING ABOVE HUMAN. + +If you can do the first, the second will be very easy. If you can come to imagine that your +body is burning, it is not difficult to imagine that the whole world is burning — because +your body is the world, and through your body you are related to the world. Really, only +for your body are you related to the world — the world is extended body. If you can think +and imagine that your body is burning, there is no difficulty in imagining it with the +whole world. And the sutra says it is a make-believe world — just because you believe, it +is there. The whole world is burning, disappearing. + +But if you feel the first is very difficult, you can even start with the second. The second is +very easy if you can do the first. And there is no need really to do the second if you have +done the first. With your body, everything disappears automatically. But you can do the +second directly also, if the first is very difficult. + + +I said start with the toes because they are very far away from the head, from the ego, but +you may not even feel like starting from the toes. Then move still further away: start with +the world, and then move nearer and nearer towards yourself. Start with the world and +then come nearer. And when the whole world is just burning, it will be easy for you to +bum in that whole burning world. + +The second is: + +MEDITATE ON THE MAKE-BELIEVE WORLD AS BURNING TO ASHES AND +BECOME BEING ABOVE HUMAN. + +If you can see the whole world burning, you have gone above human, you have become +superhuman. You have come to know a superhuman consciousness. You can imagine it, +but a training of imagination is needed. jOur imaginations are not very trained. They are +very untrained, because there is no schooling for imagination. Intellect is trained, schools +and colleges exist and a major part of life is spent in training the intellect. Imagination is +not trained. And imagination has a very wonderful dimension of its own. If you can train +your imagination, you can do wonders through it. + +Start with small things, because it is difficult to jump to bigger things and you may be a +failure. For example: this imagination that the whole world is burning — it cannot go very + + + +deep. First, you know it is imagination, and even if in imagination you think that the +flames are everywhere, you will feel that the world is not burned, it is there still, because +it is only your imagination. + +You don’t kn ow how imagination can become real. You have to feel it first. + +Try a simple experiment before you enter this technique. Just close both your hands +together, close your eyes, and just imagine that now your hands cannot be opened, they +have gone dead, locked, and you cannot do anything to open them. In the beginning you +will feel that you are just imagining and you can open them. But for ten minutes go on +thinking that you cannot open them, you cannot do anything, your hands cannot be +opened. And then after ten minutes try to open them. + +Out of ten, four persons will immediately succeed, forty percent of people will +immediately succeed: after ten minutes they cannot open their hands — the imagination +has become real. Howsoever they struggle... and the more they struggle to open, the more +difficult it will be. You will start perspiring. You are seeing your own hands and you +cannot open them. They are locked! + +But don’t be afraid. Just close your eyes again, and again imagine that now you can open +them; only then will you be able to open them. Forty percent will succeed immediately. +Those forty percent can move in this technique easily; there is no problem for them. + +For the other remaining sixty percent it will be difficult, it will take time. Those who are +very sensitive can imagine anything and it will happen. And once they feel that +imagination can become real, then they have a feeling and they can move. + +Then you can do many things with your imagination. Already you are doing it without +knowing it. Already you are doing it, but you are not aware. + +A certain disease comes to the city — a French ’flu comes — and you become a victim of +it. You can never think that out of one hundred cases, seventy percent are just because of +imagination. Because the ’flu is there you start imagining that now you are going to fall +prey to it — and you will fall. Many diseases are just caught through your imagination, +many problems you create because of your imagination. You can also solve them once +you know that it is you who are creating them. Train your imagination a little, and then +this technique will be very helpful. + +The third technique: + +AS, SUBJECTIVELY, + +LETTER FLOW INTO WORDS AND WORDS INTO SENTENCES, + +AND AS, OBJECTIVELY, + +CIRCLES FLOW INTO WORLDS AND WORLDS INTO PRINCIPLES, + +FIND AT LAST THESE CONVERGING IN OUR BEING. + +That too is an imaginative technique. The ego is always afraid — afraid of being +vulnerable, open; afraid something may enter and destroy it. So the ego creates a citadel +around it; you start living in a walled prison. Nothing should be allowed to enter in you. +You are afraid — if something comes in and disturbs, then what to do? — so it is better not +to allow anything to come in. + + +All communication stops. Even with those you love or you think that you love, there is + + + +no communication. + +Look at a wife and husband talking. They are not talking to each other; there is no +communication. Rather, they are avoiding each other through words. They are talking so +that the communication can be avoided. In silence they will become vulnerable, in +silence they will come closer, because in silence the ego, the wall, will not be there. So +the husband and wife, they will never be silent. They will be talking about something or +other just to fill in time, and just so as not to be open to each other. We are so afraid of +the other. + +I have heard about Mulla Nasrudin, that one day as he was just walking out of his house +his wife said, 'Nasrudin, have you forgotten what day today is?' + +Nasrudin knew about it — it was their twenty-fifth wedding anniversary — so he said, 'I +know it. I know it well.’ + +The wife persisted, 'Then how are we going to celebrate it?’ + +So Nasrudin said, 'Darling, I don’t know.’ And then he scratched his head, puzzled, and +said, 'How would it be if we keep two minutes' silence to celebrate it?' + +You cannot remain silent with someone; you begin to feel restlessness. In silence, the +other enters you. You are open, your doors are open, your windows are open. You are +afraid. You go on talking, you go on creating devices to remain closed. + + +The ego is an enclosure, it is a prison, and the prison is accepted because we feel so +insecure. The prison gives a certain feeling of security: you are protected, guarded. To do +this technique, this third technique, the first and most basic thing is: know well that life is +insecurity. There is no way to make it secure. Whatsoever you do is not going to help. +You can create only a fiction of security — life remains insecure. It is the very nature of +it, because death is involved in it, so how can life be secure? + +And think for a moment: if life is really secure, it will be already dead. An absolutely +totally secure life cannot be alive, because the very adventure is lost. If you are protected +from all dangers you will be dead. In the very being of life there is adventure, danger, +insecurity. Death is involved. + +I love you. I have entered a dangerous path. Now nothing can be secure, but now I will +try to make everything secure. For tomorrow, I will kill everything that is alive, because +only then can I feel secure tomorrow also. Love is transformed into marriage — marriage +is a security. Love is insecure — the next moment everything can change. And you have +invested so much, and in the next moment the beloved leaves you, or the friend leaves +you, and you are left in a vacuum. Love is insecure. You cannot fix the future, you cannot +predict. So live is killed and a secure substitute is found — that is marriage. + + +With marriage you can be secure; it is predictable. The wife will be your wife the next +day; the husband will be your husband in the future also — but just because you have +secured it. And now there is no danger. It is dead. The relationship is dead now, because +only dead things can be permanent; alive things are bound to be changing. Change is the +very quality of life, and in change is insecurity. + +Those who want to enter deeper realms of life must be ready to be insecure, must be +ready to be in danger, must be ready to move into the unknown, and must not try in any +way to fix the future. The very effort will kill everything. And remember this also: that +insecurity is not only alive, it is beautiful. Security is dull, ugly. Insecurity is alive and + + + +beautiful. You can be secure if you close your doors and windows and everything. + +Neither light enters nor air enters; no one enters. You are secure in a way, but you are not +living, you have already entered your tomb. + +This technique is possible if you are vulnerable, open, not afraid, because this technique +is allowing the whole universe to enter in you. + +AS, SUBJECTIVELY, + +LETTERS FLOW INTO WORDS AND WORDS INTO SENTENCES, + +AND AS, OBJECTIVELY, + +CIRCLES FLOW INTO WORLDS AND WORLDS INTO PRINCIPLES, + +FIND AT LAST THESE CONVERGING IN OUR BEING. + +Everything converging in my being. + +.. I am standing under the open sky, and the whole existence, from everywhere, from +every nook and corner, is converging in me — your ego cannot exist. In that openness +where the whole existence is converging in you, you cannot exist as an I. You will exist +as an open space, but not as a crystallized I. + +To do this technique start with a small step. Just sit under a tree. The breeze is blowing +and the leaves of the tree are rustling. The wind touches you, it moves around you, it +passes. But don't allow it just to pass you; allow it to move within you and pass through +you. Just close your eyes, and as it is passing through the tree and there is a rustling of +the leaves, feel that you are also like a tree, open, and the wind is blowing through you — +not by your side but right through you. + +The rustling of the tree will enter in you, and you will feel that from every pore of your +body the air is passing. It is really passing through you. It is not only imagination, it is a +fact — you have forgotten. You are not only breathing through the nose, you are breathing +through the whole body — from every pore of it, from millions of pores. If you are +allowed to breathe through your nose, but all the pores of your body are closed, painted, +you will die within three hours. You cannot be alive just by breathing through the nose. +Every cell of your body is a living organism, and every cell is breathing. + +The air is really passing through you, but you have lost the contact. So sit under a tree +and feel. + +In the beginning it will look like imagination, but soon it will turn into a reality. It is a +reality — that the air is passing through you. Then sit under a rising sun, and not only feel +that the rays of the sun are touching you, but that they are entering you and passing +through you, so you become vulnerable, you begin to feel open. + +And this can be done with everything. For example, I am speaking here and you are +hearing me. You can hear just through the ears, or you can hear through the whole of the +body. You can just try it right here, just with a change of the emphasis: you are not +hearing my words through the ears only, you are hearing me through the whole of your +body. And when you really hear, and when you really listen, it is the whole body that +listens. It is not only a part, it is not a fragmented energy that listens, it is the whole of +you. The whole of your body is involved in listening — then my words are passing +through you; from every cell, from every pore, you are drinking them. They are being +absorbed from everywhere. + +You can do this. Just go and sit in a temple. Many worshippers will be coming and going, + + + +and the bell of the temple will be hit again and again. Just listen with the whole of your +body. The bell is ringing and the whole temple is agog; every wall of it is reflecting. + +To reflect this, in order to feel that the sound is converging on you, we created a round +shape. So from everywhere the sound is thrown back, it converges upon you from +everywhere, and you can listen to it through your whole body — every pore, every cell, +listening, drinking, absorbing it, and it is passing through you. You have become porous; +everywhere the door is open. You are not a barrier now to anything — the air, or the +words, or the sound, or the rays, or anything. You are not a barrier, you don’t resist +anything. + +When you come to feel that now you don’t resist, you are not in a struggle, suddenly you +will become aware that the ego is not there, because the ego exists only when you +struggle. It is a resistance. Whenever you say no, the ego comes into existence; whenever +you say yes, the ego is not there. So I call a man an ASTIK, a real theist, who has said +yes to the whole existence; there is no 'no’ in him, no resistance. He accepts everything, +he allows everything to happen. Even if death comes, he will not close his door. The +doors will remain open. + +This openness has to be brought, only then can you do this technique, because this +technique is saying that the whole existence is falling, converging on you — no resistance, +welcoming, allowing it to converge. You will simply disappear, you will become a space, +infinite space, because this infinite universe cannot converge on such a narrow atomic +thing as the ego. + +It can converge only when you have become infinite like it, when you have yourself +become an infinite space. But this happens. Slowly you have to become more and more +sensitive and you have to become aware of your resistances. + +We are very resistant. If I touch you, you can feel that you are resisting the touch, you are +creating a barrier, so my warmth cannot enter you, my touch cannot enter you. We don’t +allow each other to touch. If someone touches you, you become alert and the other says +'Excuse me’. There is resistance everywhere. If I look at you, you resist, because the look +can enter in you, it can penetrate deep, it can stir you, and then what will you do? + +And this is not only with strangers. There is no need even with strangers, because no one +is a stranger or everyone is a stranger. Just by living under one roof, how can the +strangeness be destroyed? Do you know your father who has given you birth? He is a +stranger. Do you know your mother? She remains a stranger. So either everyone is a +stranger, nor no one is a stranger. But we are afraid and create barriers everywhere. These +barriers make us insensitive; then nothing can enter into us. + +People come to me and they say, 'No one loves. No one loves me.’ And I touch that man +and I feel he is afraid even of touch. There is a subtle withdrawal. I take his hand in my +hand and he has withdrawn. He is not there in the hand; only a dead thing is in my hand +— he has withdrawn. + +And he says, 'No one loves me.’ How can anyone love you? And even if the whole world +loves, you will not feel it, because you are closed. Love cannot enter you; there is no +gate, no door. And you are suffering in your own prison. + +If the ego is there, you are closed — for love, for meditation, for God. So first try to be +more sensitive, more vulnerable, open, allowing things to happen to you. Only then can +the divine happen, because that is the last happening. If you cannot allow ordinary things + + + +to happen to you, how can you allow the ultimate? Because when the ultimate happens to +you, you will be no more. You will be simply no more. + +Kabir has said, 'When I was seeking you, you were not there. And now, when you are +there, where is that seeker Kabir? He is no more. So what type of meeting is this?’ Kabir +wonders, 'What type of meeting is this? When I was there, the divine was not. Now the +divine is there, but I am not. So what type of meeting is this?’ + +But really this is the only meeting, because two cannot meet. Ordinarily we think two are +needed to meet — how will the meeting be there if there is only one? So the ordinary +logic says that for a meeting at least two are needed, the other is needed. But for a real +meeting, for a meeting which we call love, for a meeting which we call prayer, for a +meeting which we call samadhi, ecstasy, one is needed. When the seeker is there, the +sought is not; and when the sought has come, the seeker has disappeared. + + +Why is this so? — because the ego is the barrier. When you feel you are, you are so much +that nothing can enter in you. You are filled with your own self. When you are not, then +everything can pass through you. You have become so vast that even the divine can pass +through you. The whole existence is now ready to pass through you, because you are +ready. + +So the whole art of religion is how not to be, how to dissolve, how to surrender, how to +become an open space. + +THE END. + + + +Chapter 54: The fire of awareness + + +Question 1 + +A MEDITATOR WHO IS VULNERABLE, PASSIVE, OPEN AND RECEPTIVE, +FEELS THAT WITH THESE CHARACTERISTICS HE SUFFERS DUE TO THE +INFLUENCE OF THE NON-MEDITATIVE, NEGATIVE AND TENSE VIBRATIONS +AROUND HIM. PLEASE EXPLAIN HOW HE CAN PRESERVE HIS VULNERABLE +PSYCHE FROM THE HARMFUL VIBRATIONS. + +If you are really vulnerable, nothing is negative for you — because the negative is your +interpretation. Nothing is harmful to you — because the harmful is your interpretation. If +you are really open, then nothing can harm you, nothing can be felt as harmful. You feel +something is negative and something is harmful because you resist, because you are +against it, because there is no acceptance of it. This has to be deeply understood. + +The enemy exists there because you are protecting yourself against him. The enemy is +there because you are not open. If you are open, then the whole existence is friendly; it +cannot be otherwise. Really, you will not even feel it as friendly — it is simply friendly. +There is no feeling even that it is friendly, because that feeling can exist only with the +contrary feeling of enmity. + +Let me put it in this way: if you are vulnerable, it means you are ready to live in +insecurity. Deep down it means you are ready even to die. You will not resist, you will +not oppose, you will not stand in the way. If death comes, there will be no resistance. + +You will simply allow it to happen. You accept existence in its totality. Then how can +you feel it as death? + +If you deny, then you can feel it as the enemy. If you don’t deny, how can you feel it as +the enemy? The enemy is created by your denial. The death cannot harm you, because the +hann is your interpretation. Now no one can harm you; it has become impossible. + +This is the secret of Taoist teaching. Lao Tzu's basic teaching is this: if you accept, the +whole existence is with you. It cannot be otherwise. If you deny, you create the enemy. +The more you deny, the more you defend, the more you protect, the more enemies are +created. The enemies are your creation. They are not there outside; they exist in your +interpretation. + +Once you can understand this, then this question can never arise. You cannot say, T am +meditative, I am vulnerable, open. So now how am I to defend myself against negative +vibrations around me?’ Nothing can be negative now. What does the negative mean? The +negative means that which you want to deny, that which you don't want to accept, that +which you think is harmful. Then you are not open, then you are not in a meditative state. +This question arises only intellectually, this is not a felt question. You have not tasted +meditation, you have not known it. You are simply thinking, and that thinking is just a +supposition. You suppose, 'If I meditate and become open, then I will be in insecurity. + +The negative vibrations will enter in me and they will be harmful. Then how am I to +defend myself? This is a supposed question. Don’t bring supposed questions to me. They +are futile, irrelevant. + +Meditate, become open, and then you will never bring this question to me, because in the +very opening, the negative will have disappeared. Then nothing is negative. And if you + + + +think that something is negative, you cannot become open. The very fear of the negative +will create the closure. You will be closed; you cannot open. The very fear that +something can harm you... how can you become vulnerable? That's why I emphasize the +fact that unless the fear of death disappears from you, you cannot become vulnerable, you +cannot be open. You will remain closed in your own mind, in your own imprisonment. +But you can go on supposing things, and whatsoever you suppose will be wrong, because +the mind cannot know anything about meditation, it cannot penetrate that realm. When it +ceases completely, meditation happens. So you cannot suppose anything, you cannot +think about it. Either you know it, or you don't know it — you cannot think about it. + +Be open — and in the very opening of yourself, all that is negative in existence +disappears. Even death is not negative then. Nothing is negative. Your fear creates the +negativity. Deep down you are afraid; because of that fear you create safety measures. + +Against those safety measures the enemy exists. + +Look at this fact — that you create the enemy. Existence is not inimical to you. How can +it be? You belong to it, you are just a part of it, an organic part. How can existence be +inimical to you? You are existence. You are not separate; there is no gap between you +and the existence. + +Whenever you feel that the negative, the death, the enemy, the hate, is there, and if you +are open, unguarded, existence will destroy you, you feel that you have to defend +yourself. And not only defend — because the best way to defend is to be aggressive, to +offend. You cannot be simply defensive. When you feel that you have to defend yourself, +you become offensive, because to offend, to be aggressive, is the best way to defend +yourself. + +The fear creates the enemy, and then the enemy creates defence, and then defence creates +offence. You become violent. You are constantly on guard. You are against everybody. +This point has to be understood: that if you are in fear, you are against everybody. +Degrees may differ, but then your enemy and your friend are both your enemy. The +friend is a little less, that's all. Then your husband or your wife is also your enemy. You +have made an arrangement, that's all. You have become adjusted. Or it may be that you +both have a common and a greater enemy, and against that common and greater enemy +you both have become joined, you both have become one party, but the enmity is there. + + +If you are closed, the whole existence is inimical to you. Not that it is so. It appears to +you that it is inimical. When you are open, the whole existence has become your friend. +Now, when you are closed, even the friend is the enemy. It cannot be otherwise. Deep +down you are afraid of your friend also. + +Somewhere, Henry Thoreau or someone else has written that he prayed to God, 'I will +take care of my enemies, but you take care of me from my friends. I will fight with my +enemies, but protect me from my friends.’ + +Just on the surface is friendship; deep down is enmity. Your friendship may be just a +facade to hide the enemy. If you are closed you can create only the enemy, because when +you are open only then is the friend revealed. When you are open totally to someone, the +friendship has happened. It cannot happen in any other way. + +How can you love when you are closed? You live in your prison, I live in my prison, and +whenever we meet, only the prison walls touch each other and we are hiding behind. We +move in our capsules: the capsules touch each other, the bodies touch each other, but + + + +deep down we remain isolated. + +Even while making love, when your bodies have entered into each other, you have not +entered. Only bodies are meeting; you remain still in your capsule, in your cell. You are +just deceiving yourselves that there is communion. + +Even in sex, which is the deepest relationship, communion is not. It cannot happen +because you are closed. Love has become an impossibility. And this is the reason — you +are afraid. + +So don’t ask such questions; don’t bring false questions. If you have known openness, you +cannot feel that something can be harmful to you. Now nothing is harmful. That's why I +say even death is a blessing. Your approach has become different. Now wherever you +look, you look with an open heart — that open heartedness changes the quality of +everything. And you cannot feel that something is going to be harmful; you cannot ask +how to defend — there is no need. The need arises because you are closed. + +But you can go on supposing questions. People come to me and they say, 'Okay, if we +have realized God, then what?’ They start with the question — if? There are no 'ifs'. In +existence you cannot raise such questions. They are absurd, stupid, because you don’t +know what you are saying. 'If I have realized God, then what?’ + +That 'then what?’ never arises, because with the realization, you are no more, only the +God is. And with the realization, there is no future, only the present is. And with the +realization, there is no worry, because you have become one with existence. So the +question 'then what?’ never arises. This question arises because of the mind which is in +constant worry, constant struggle, constantly thinking for the future. + + +Question 2 + +WHEN I BECOME MORE AND MORE AWARE, MY ATTENTION DEVELOPS +AND THERE REMAINS A FEELING THAT I EXIST, I AM PRESENT, I AM +AWARE. PLEASE EXPLAIN HOW THIS FEELING CAN BE DISSOLVED INTO AN +EGOLESS STATE OF JUST AWARENESS. + +This is again a supposed question. WHEN I BECOME MORE AND MORE AWARE, +MY ATTENTION DEVELOPS AND THERE REMAINS A FEELING THAT I EXIST, + +I AM PRESENT, I AM AWARE. This never happens, because as awareness grows, I +decreases. In full awareness, you are, but there is no sense that I AM. In words, at the +most, this can be said — that you feel a subtle AMNESS, but there is no I. + +You feel existence, and you feel it in abundance, a fulfilled moment, but the I is not there. +You cannot feel I EXIST; you cannot feel I AM PRESENT; you cannot feel I AM +AWARE. That I is part of unawareness, inattention; part of your sleeping state. It cannot +exist. It cannot exist when you are really alert and aware and conscious. + +This is how supposed questions can arise. You can go on thinking about them, and +nothing will be solved. If this happens — that you feel I AM; I AM AWARE — then you +only have to note one thing, and that is that you are not alert, you are not aware. Then +these feelings — I AM AWARE, I AM CONSCIOUS, I EXIST — these are thoughts, you +are thinking them. They are not realized moments. You can think I AM AWARE; you +can go on repeating I AM AWARE — that will not do. + + + +Awareness is not this repetition. And when you are aware, there is no need to repeat I +AM AWARE. You are simply aware; the I is no more. + +Try awareness. Right now be alert. Where is the I? You are — rather, you are more +intensely — but where is the I, the ego? In the very intensity of consciousness, the ego is +no more. Later on, when you lose awareness and thinking starts, you can feel I AM, but +in the moment of awareness there is no I. Right now experience it. Silently you are here, +you can feel your presence, but where is the I? The I never arises. It arises only when +retrospectively you think. When you lose awareness the I arises immediately. + +Even if for a single moment you can experience simple awareness, you are, and the I is +not there. When you lose awareness, when the moment has slipped, gone, and you are +thinking, the I comes back immediately. It is part of the thought process. The very +concept of I is a thought, it belongs to thinking. I AM is a thought. + +When you are alert and there is no thought, how can you feel that I AM? The AMNESS +is there — but that too is not a thought, it is not thinking. It is there existentially, it is a +fact. But you can turn the fact into thinking immediately, and you can think about this +gap that existed where there was no I. And the moment you think, the I has come back. +With thinking, the ego enters — thinking is the ego. + +With no-thinking, the ego is not. + +So whenever you want to ask a question, first make it existential. Before giving me the +question, test whether whatsoever you are asking is relevant or not. Such questions look +relevant, just verbally, but they are like this: I say that the light has been put on, and then +I ask, ' The light has been put on and still the dar kn ess remains, so what is to be done with +darkness?’ The only thing is that the light is still off, it has not been put on, otherwise +how can the darkness remain? And if the darkness is there, then the light is not there. + +And if the light is there, then the darkness is not there. They cannot be both together. +Awareness and the ego cannot be together. If awareness has come on, if it is there, the +ego has disappeared. This is simultaneous; there is not even a single second's gap. The +light is on and the darkness has disappeared. It is not that it disappears by and by, in +steps, gradually. You cannot see it going outside; you cannot say that now the darkness is +going out. + +The light is there, and the darkness is immediately not there. There is not a single +moment's gap, because if there is a gap then you can see darkness moving out. And if +there is a single moment's gap, then there is no reason why there can't be a gap of one +hour. There is no gap. The act is simultaneous. Really, the coming of the light and the +going out of the darkness are two aspects of one phenomenon. + + +The same happens with awareness: when you are aware, the ego is not. But the ego can +go on playing tricks, and the ego can say, T am aware.’ The ego can say, 'I am aware,' +and can n you. Then the question will arise. And the ego wants to accumulate everything, +even awareness. The ego not only wants wealth, power, and prestige; it wants meditation +also, it wants samadhi also, it wants enlightenment also. + +The ego wants everything. That which is possible must be possessed. The ego wants to +possess everything — even meditation, samadhi, nirvana. So the ego can say, 'Now I have +achieved meditation,’ and then the question will arise. The meditation has been achieved, +the awareness has come, but the ego remains, the misery remains. The whole burden of +the past remains. Nothing changes. + + + +The ego is a very subtle braggart. Be aware of it. It can deceive you. And it can use +words, it can verbalize things. It can verbalize anything, even nirvana. + +I have heard that once it happened that two butterflies were winging their way through +the canyons of New York. Just passing near the Empire State Building, the male butterfly +said to the female, 'You know, if I wanted to, just with one blow I could cause this +Empire State Building to collapse.’ + +One wise man happened to be there who heard this remark, so he called that male +butterfly and asked, 'What were you saying? You know very well that you cannot cause +that Empire State Building to collapse with a single blow. + +You know it well, there is no need to tell you, so why did you say such a thing?’ + +The male butterfly said, 'Excuse me, sir. I am very sorry. I was just trying to influence +my girl friend.’ + +The wise man said, 'Don’t do it,’ and dismissed the butterfly. + +The male butterfly went back to his girl friend. Of course, the girl friend asked, 'What +was the wise guy saying to you?’ + +So the male braggart said, 'He begged me and said, "Don’t do it!" He was so afraid, +trembling, nervous. He had heard that I was going to cause this Empire State Building to +collapse, so he said, "Don’t do it~’" + +The same is happening continuously. Those words were uttered by the wise man with a +very different meaning. He meant, 'Don’t say such things,’ but the ego exploited him. +Your ego can exploit anything, it is deeply cunning. And it is so experienced in cunning +— experiences of millennia — that you cannot even detect where the cunning enters. +People come to me and they say, 'The meditation has happened. Now what to do about +my worries?’ This is how the ego goes on playing tricks — and they are not even aware of +what they are saying. 'The meditation has happened, the kundalini has arisen — so what +to do? The worries still continue.’ + +Your mind wants to believe things, so without doing anything you go on believing, +deceiving — wish-fulfillments. + +But the reality doesn’t change by your wish- fulfillments: the worries continue. You can +deceive yourself, you cannot deceive the worries. They will not just disappear because +you say, ' The meditation has happened and the kundalini has arisen, and now I have +entered the fifth body.’ Those worries will not even hear what you are saying. But if +meditation really happens, where are the worries? How can they exist in a meditative +mind? + +So remember this: that when you are aware, you are, but you are not the ego. Then you +are unlimited, then you are infinite expanse, but with no center. There is no focused +feeling of I; just unfocused existence, beginning nowhere, ending nowhere — just infinite +sky. And when this I disappears, automatically the YOU disappears, because the YOU +can exist only in reference to the 1. 1 am here; that’s why you are there. If this I disappears +from me, you are no more there. You cannot be. How can you exist? + +I don’t mean that you will not be there bodily, that you will not be there physically. You +will be there as you are, but for me, you cannot be you. The you is meaningful in +reference to my I; my I creates YOU. One part disappears; the other disappears for me. +Then simple existence is there; all the barriers have dissolved. With the ego disappearing, +the whole existence becomes one. The ego is the divider — and the ego exists because +you are inattentive. + + + +The fire of awareness will destroy it. + +Try it more and more. Suddenly become alert. Walking on the street, immediately stop, +take a deep breath, become alert for a moment. And when I say alert, I mean simply alert +of whatsoever is happening — the traffic noise, people passing and talking, everything +that is all around. Simply become alert. You are not there in that moment: existence is +and the beauty of it. + +Then the traffic noise doesn't appear to be noise, it doesn’t look like a disturbance, +because there is no one to resist it and fight it. It simply comes to you and passes; it is +heard and heard no more. It comes and passes. There is no barrier against which it can +strike. It cannot make a wound in you, because all wounds are made in the ego. It will +pass. There will be no barrier to it on which it can strike; there will be no fight, no +disturbance. + +Remember this: the noise on the street is not the disturbance. When the noise of the street +struggles against you, when you have a fixed notion that it is a disturbance, it becomes +disturbance. When you accept it, it comes and passes. And you are simply bathed by it; +you come out of it more fresh. And nothing tires you then. The only tiring thing, that +which goes on dissipating your energy, is this resistance which we call the ego. + +But we never look at it in this way. The ego has become our life, the very gist of it. + +Really, there is no ego. If I say to someone.... Many times it happens. If I say to someone +to dissolve this ego, immediately he stares at me as if with the question, the nude +question, that 'If ego is dissolved, then where is life? Then I am no more’. + +I have heard that one very great politician, a big leader of a country, was asked, 'You +must be getting tired. The whole day, wherever you move, there is a crowd of autograph +seekers.’ + +That politician, that leader said, 'It almost kills me — but this is only half of the truth.’ He +must have been a very rare, honest man. He said, ' It almost kills me — but almost. If there +was no one seeking my autograph, it would kill me completely. This continuous crowd +almost kills me, but the other thing would be more dangerous. It would kill me +completely if there was no one to ask for my autograph.’ + +So howsoever tiring the ego, howsoever wearing, you still feel it is life, and if the ego is +not there, you feel life will disappear from your mind. You cannot conceive how life can +exist without you, without there always being a reference point of I. It is logical in a way, +because we have never lived without it. We have lived through it, we have lived around +it; we know only one type of life, which is based on ego. We don’t know any other life. +And because we have lived through it, we have not been really able to live. + +We are simply struggling to live, and the life never happens to us, it just by-passes us. It +is always just in the reach, in the hope — just tomorrow, the next moment, and we will be +living. But it never comes, it is never achieved. It always remains a hope and a dream — +but we go on moving. And because it is not coming, we move fast. That too is logical: if +life is not happening to us, the mind can think only one thing — that we are not moving +fast enough. So make hurry, be in a speed. + +Once it happened that one of the great scientists, T.H. Huxley, was going to deliver a talk +somewhere in London. He came to the station, to the suburban station, but the train was +late, so he jumped into a cab and told the driver, 'Hurry! Go at top speed!’ + +They were racing fast, when suddenly he realized that he had not given the address. But +then he also remembered that he had himself forgotten the address. So he asked the + + + +driver, 'Cabby, do you know where I am supposed to be going?’ + +He said, 'No, sir. But I am going as fast as possible.’ + +This is happening. You are going as fast as possible. Where are you moving? Why are +you moving? What is the destination? — the hope that someday life will happen to you. +And why is it not happening right now? You are alive — why is it not happening right +now? Why is the nirvana always in the future, always in the tomorrow? Why is it not +today? And the tomorrow never comes — or whenever it comes it will always be the +today and you will miss again. + +But we have lived only in this way. We know only one dimension of living — this so- +called living we are already living — just dead, not alive at all, just pulling together +anyhow, just waiting. + +With the ego it will always remain a waiting — and a hopeless waiting. You can do it fast, +you can make haste, but you will never reach anywhere: just by hurrying you will +dissipate energy and you will die. And you have done that so many times. You have +always been in a hurry, and in that hurry dissipating energy, and then only death comes +and nothing else. You are hurrying for life, and only death comes and nothing else. But +the mind, because it is accustomed to only one dimension, because it has known only one +way — which is not even a way, but just appears to be a way — will say that if there is no +ego, where is life? + +But I say to you, if there is ego, there is no possibility of life, only promises. The ego is a +perfect promise-maker. It goes on promising you. And you are so unaware — no promise +is ever fulfilled, but again you believe. When the new promises are given, you again +believe. + +Look back! The ego promised many things, and nothing has been achieved through it. All +the promises have fallen down. But you never look back, you never compare. When you +were a child there were promises for youth: life will be there when you are young. +Everyone was saying it, and you also were hoping that when you become young, all that +was to happen would happen. + +Now those days have passed, the promise remains unfulfilled, but you have forgotten. +You have forgotten the promise, you have forgotten that is has not been fulfilled. It is so +painful to look at it that you never look at it. + +Now you hope for the old age — that in old age the sannyas will flower, the meditation +will happen to you. Then the worries will be over: your children will have gone to the +college, and everything will have become established. Then there will be no +responsibility on you. Then you will be able to seek the divine. Then, in the old age, the +miracle is going to happen. And you will die unfulfilled. + +It is not going to happen, because it never happens in the hope, it never happens with the +hope. It never happens with the promise of the ego. It can happen right now. It can only +happen right now. But then a very intense awareness is needed, so that you can throw all +the promises, and all the hopes, and all the future programs, and all the dreams, and look +directly here and now at what you are. + +In that returning to yourself — your consciousness not moving somewhere ahead but +returning to yourself — you become a circle of consciousness. This moment becomes +eternal. You are alert and aware. In that alertness, in that awareness, there is no I; simple +existence, simple being. And simplicity comes out of that awareness. + +Simplicity is not a loin-cloth, simplicity is not living in poverty, simplicity is not + + + +becoming a beggar. + + +Those are very complex and very cunning things, very calculated. Simplicity is born +when you have achieved a simple existence where no I exists. Out of that, simplicity +arises; you become humble. Not that you practise it, because a practised simplicity can +never be simplicity. A practised humbleness is just a hidden ego. + +It happens: if you can be aware, it starts flowing through you. You become humble; not +against the ego, because a humbleness against the ego is again a different sort of ego — a +more subtle ego and more dangerous, more poisonous. It is humbleness as the absence of +ego; not as the opposite of the ego, just the absence. The ego has disappeared. You have +come to yourself and known that there is no ego: simplicity arises, humbleness arises — +they simply flow. You have not done anything for them; they are by-products — by- +products of intense awareness. + +So this type of question is foolish. If you feel that you are aware and still the I remains, +know well that you are not aware. Make effort to be aware. And this is the criterion: +when you are aware, the I is not; when you are aware, the I is not; when you are aware, +the I is not found there. This is the only criterion. + +Question 3 + +ONE DAY YOU EXPLAINED ABOUT THE IMBALANCE OF OBJECT-CENTERED +WESTERN CULTURE AND SUBJECT-CENTERED EASTERN CULTURE, AND +YOU ALSO MENTIONED THAT NOWHERE IN ANY CULTURE IS THE TOTAL +HUMAN BEING ACCEPTED. + +DO YOU VISUALIZE SUCH A COMING CULTURE WHICH WILL BE ABLE TO +ACCEPT AND DEVELOP THE HUMAN BEING IN HIS TOTALITY - OBJECTIVE +AS WELL AS SUBJECTIVE? + +This one-sided development has occurred as a natural fallacy, as a very natural fallacy. +Try to understand the natural fallacy, because many things depend on it. + +Whenever something is said, the opposite of it is denied. Whenever something is said, +something is simultaneously denied. If I say 'God is within;, 'God is without’ is denied. I +have not mentioned it at all. But if I say 'God is without’, then 'God is within’ is denied. + +If I say, 'To be silent you have to move inwards,’ it is implied that if you move outwards, +you will never be silent. So whatsoever is said in language always negates something. +This means that language can never cover the whole of life. Or, if you try to cover the +whole of life, language becomes illogical, irrational. If I say, 'God is within and God is +without,’ it becomes meaningless. If I say, 'Everything is God,’ it becomes meaningless. + +If I say, 'Whether you go out or whether you go in, silence can be achieved,’ no meaning +is carried then because I am saying both — both the opposites simultaneously. I am +putting them together; they negate each other — and then nothing is said. + +It has been tried. It has been tried many times that the whole of life be covered by +linguistic expression. + +It has never been successful, and it cannot be. You can do it, but then your assertions +become mystic; they don’t carry any meaning. Logic has some requirements to be +fulfilled — and language is logic. + +If you ask me, 'Are you here?’ and I say, 'Yes, in a sense I am here, and in a sense I am +not here,’ or I say, 'Both yes and no,’ then if you love me you will call me a mystic; if you + + + +don't love me, you will call me a madman — because how can both be? Either I am here +— then I must say yes; or I am not here — then I must say no. But if I say yes and no both +together, I am taking a jump out of the logical structure of the language. + +Language is always a choice. Because of this, all the cultures, all the societies, all the +civilizations become one-sided. And no culture can exist without language. Really, +language creates the culture. Man is the only language animal; no other animal creates +any culture or society or civilization. Only man creates culture and civilization and +society. And with language, choice enters; and with choice, imbalance. No animal is +imbalanced, remember. Only man is imbalanced. All animals exist in deep balance: trees +and rocks and everything. Everything is balanced; only man is imbalanced. What is the +problem? — that man lives through language. Language creates choice. + +If I say to someone that he is both beautiful and ugly, the sentence carries no meaning. + +Ugly and beautiful both? — what do you mean? If I say, 'You are beautiful,’ it is +meaningful. If I say, 'You are ugly,’ it is meaningful. But if I say, 'You are both. You are +wise and foolish both,’ it cannot carry any meaning. But reality is so. Really, no one is +simply ugly and no one is simply beautiful. Wherever beauty exists, ugliness exists; +wherever ugliness exists, beauty exists. They are part of one whole. And wherever +wisdom exists, foolishness exists. You cannot find a wise man who is not also a fool, and +you cannot find a fool who is not also a wise man. + +It may be difficult for you to conceive, because whenever you say, 'This man is a fool,’ +you stop searching, you are closed, you have closed the door. You say, 'This man is a +fool.’ Now you are not going to search for his wisdom. And even if his wisdom is +revealed to you, you will not listen to it. You will say, 'This man is a fool. How can he be +a wise man? It is impossible; something wrong has happened. He must have done it in a +foolish way. This is something accidental. He cannot be wise.’ If you decide that this man +is wise and then something foolish comes out of him, you cannot believe it, or you will +have come explanations and you will rationalize it — that this must be wise. + +Life is both together, but language divides. Language is a choice. Because of this, every +culture creates its own choice-pattern. + +In the east they developed technology, they developed scientific research; they developed +all that is now developed in the west. Live thousand years ago they developed everything, +and then they felt the meaninglessness of it — as it is now felt in the west. They felt that it +was useless. + +When they felt that it was useless, they turned to the opposite extreme. They said, 'Now +turn within. Whatsoever is without is illusory, it leads nowhere. Turn within.’ Then +science stopped growing, then technology stopped. Not only stopped: when they turned +within, they started condemning all that was without. 'Just live the life which is in! Leave +all that is without!’ They became against the world, life-negative, denying all that is +material... only the spiritual, the pure spiritual. + +Life is both. Really, to say life is both is not right. Life is one. That which we call +material is just one expression of the spiritual, and that which we call spiritual is nothing +but one expression of the material. Life is one. The within and without are not two +opposite things, just two poles of one existence. + +But whenever a society reaches to the extreme of one choice — because one choice is +bound to be extremist — immediately you will miss the other, and that which you miss, +you feel more. That which you have, you can forget, but that which you miss, you feel + + + +more. So the east, at the peak of scientific and technological development, felt the +absurdity of it: it is useless, you cannot attain silence through it, you cannot attain bliss +through it, so throw it away, renounce it, move inward, move to the inner world. + +And then this inner movement automatically became a denial of the outer. + +In the west that is happening now. Now the west has attained to a technological height; +now the meaninglessness is felt. Now India has gone to the depths of poverty. It was +bound to happen, because the eastern mind started moving inwards. When you move +inwards at the cost of all that is without, you are going to be poor, and you are going to +be in bondage, and you are going to be in disease and suffering. That is bound to be so. +Now India is not interested in meditation, India is not interested in the inner world, India +is not interested in the nirvana. India is interested in the modem technology. The Indian +student is interested in engineering, in medical science. The Indian genius is going to the +west to leam the know-how, the atomic energy. And the western genius is interested in +coming to the east to know what meditation is, to know how to move in the inner space. +And they have achieved. For the first time in the history of man they have kn own how to +move in the outer space. They have reached the moon. Now that they have reached the +moon the thing has become absurd. Now they are asking, 'What will come out of it? + +Even if we have gone to the moon, what has happened? — man remains in the same +misery.’ The moon is not going to help, because you can transfer man to the moon, but he +remains the same man. + +So movement in the outer space seems to be of no use, a wastage of energy. How to +move in the inner space? + +Now they turn to the east, and the east is turning to the west — again the choice. If the +west turns to the east completely, within two or three centuries the west will become +poor. Look at the hippies — they are already doing that. And if the new western +generation turns absolutely hippie, then who is going to work for the technology, and +who is going to work for the industry, and who is going to work for the civilization that +the west has achieved? It takes centuries and centuries to achieve something; you can +lose it within a generation. + +If the generation denies and says, 'We are not going to the universities,’ what can you do? +The old generation — how long can it prolong it? Twenty years and everything can +disappear, just through the denial of the new generation — 'I am not going to the +university-’ And they are leaving, they are becoming dropouts. They say, 'What is the +use of big cars, of big houses, of a big technology, when there is no love? When there is +no peace of mind, what is the use of all this wealth? What is the use of this high standard +of living when there is no life? So leave this!’ + +Within two centuries the west can go to the very depths of poverty. It has happened in the +east. In the days of the Mahabharat, almost the same technology was developed in the +east. + +Then it was found to be of no use. And if the Indian mind turns to technology, within two +generations religion will disappear — it has already disappeared — and just the word +'meditation’ will look out of date. If you talk about the inner, people will think you are +not in your senses: 'What do you mean by the inner? There is no inner.’ + +This happens because of the language — because language is a choice, and the mind +moves to the extreme. And when it moves to one extreme, the other is lost. And with the + + + +other, many qualities disappear, and when they disappear you feel the hunger for them. +Then you again move to the other extreme. Then something else is lost. + +So no total culture has been born yet, and it cannot be bom unless man learns to remain +silent, unless silence becomes the very core of human mind. Not language but silence — +because in silence you are whole, in language you are always part. Unless humanity starts +living through silence — not through language, not through mind, but through the totality +of the being — no total culture is possible. Only total human beings can constitute a total +culture. + +The human being is partial and fragmented. Every human being is just a fragment of that +which he can be, that which he should be. He is just a fragment of his potentiality. These +fragmentary human beings create fragmentary societies. Fragmentary societies have +always been there. + +But now it seems possible that we may become aware of this whole nonsense of turning +to extremes. And if this awareness becomes intense, and we don’t move to the opposite, +but rather we start to look at the whole.... + +For example, myself. I am not against the material, I am not against the spiritual. I am not +for the spiritual, and I am not for the material. I am for both. There is no choice for me +between the material and the spiritual, the inner and the outer. I am for both, because if +you accept both, only then you become total and whole. But this is difficult to +understand, to grasp, because of the heritage. + +Whenever you see a spiritual man, you start looking to see whether he is poor or not. He +must be poor, he must be living in a hut, he must be starving. Why? Why should he be +poor and why should he be starving? — because the inner has to be chosen against the +outer; that has become a part of the heritage. If you see a man living in luxury, you +cannot believe that he is spiritual. How can he be spiritual? + +What is wrong in luxury? And how is spirituality against luxury? Really, spiritually is the +ultimate luxury. Really, only a spiritual man can be in luxury. He knows how to relax, +and he knows how to enjoy, and he knows how to carry bliss wherever he moves. But the +heritage has gone into the very cells of your brain. If you see a spiritual man walking in +poverty, you feel that he must be authentic. + +How is poverty related to spirituality? And why? We have been choosing extremes. This +is difficult to understand because of a long tradition — and you are not even aware. +Someone was just here, and he told me that in Wardha where Vinoba lives, it is very hot +now the whole day — and he will not use a fan, he will not use a cooler, he will not use an +air-conditioner. Impossible! How can a spiritual man use an air-conditioner? He cannot +even use a fan. The man who had come from there was very much impressed. He said, +'See, what a great spiritual man! He is not even using a fan.’ + +Then I asked, 'What is he doing?’ + +He said, 'The whole day, from ten to five, for seven hours, he goes on putting cold cloths +on his head and on his stomach.’ + +Seven of Vinoba’s hours wasted every day! — and what is the cost of a fan or a cooler or +an air-conditioner? And Vinoba’s seven wasted hours every day...? But if there was a fan, +this man would have felt that Vinoba is not spiritual. And somehow Vinoba is also +agreeing with this type of attitude — that Vinoba’s seven hours every day are not +important. + +Fife is very short, and a genius like Vinoba is wasting seven hours unnecessarily. But he + + + +himself also feels that technology is somehow anti-spiritual. The outside and the inside — +he has chosen the inside. But if you are choosing the inside, even putting on the wet cloth +is outside. + +It is doing the same thing, only in a very primitive way. What are you doing? You are +creating a sort of cooling. And you are wasting seven hours for it! This is at a very great +cost. But we will say, 'No, this is austerity, this is spirituality, and this man is great.’ This +has gone to the very cells of our brains. + +I accept life in its totality. The outer and the inner both are there, and they both belong to +me. And they must be balanced. You need not choose one at the cost of the other. And if +you choose, you are falling a victim — victim of an extreme — and you will suffer for it. +Create a balance. The outer and the inner are not opposed. They are movements of the +same energy, two banks of the same river, and the river cannot flow with only one bank. +You can forget the other, but the other will be there. And the river can exist only if the +other is there. You can forget it completely: then hypocrisy is bom, because +unnecessarily you have to go on hiding the other. There is no need. The river cannot +flow. + +Life flows between the inner and the outer, and both are essential. Life cannot exist with +one. And the two are not really two. The two banks of the river only appear two; if you +go deep in the river they are joined — the same ground is appearing as two banks. The +outer and the inner are the same ground, the same phenomenon. + +If this insight goes deep, and human beings. + +.. and I am interested in human beings, not in cultures, not in societies, not in +civilizations. If human beings become total and balanced, it is possible that some day +humanity can become a balanced society. And only then will man be at ease. And only +then will it be possible to grow without any unnecessary difficulty. + +Now, rarely it happens that someone grows — rarely. Almost all the seeds are wasted. In +millions, one seed grows and comes to flower. This seems sheer wastage. But if society is +balanced — nothing is denied, nothing is chosen, but the whole is accepted in a deep +hannony — then many will grow. Really, quite the reverse will be the case: it will happen +rarely that someone will not grow. + + +THE END. + + + +Chapter 55: Only the unreal dissolves + + +FEEL: MY THOUGHT, I-NESS, INTERNAL ORGANS - ME. + +BEFORE DESIRE AND BEFORE KNOWING, + +HOW CAN I SAY I AM? + +CONSIDER. DISSOLVE IN THE BEAUTY. + +Once a visitor asked many people in a small town about the mayor: 'What type of man is +your mayor?’ + +Said the priest, 'He is no good.’ + +Said the filling-station attendant, 'He is a bum.’ + +And said the barber, 'I never in my life voted for that rascal.’ + +Then the visitor met the mayor, a much maligned man, and the visitor asked, 'What pay +are you getting for your job?’ + +Said the mayor, 'My goodness, I am not getting any pay for it. I have accepted this job +just for the honor of it!’ + +This is the situation of the ego — only YOU think about your ego, no one else. Only you +think that your ego is enthroned; for everyone else it is not so. No one agrees with your +ego except you; everyone else is against it. But you go on living in a dream, in a +delusion. You create your own image. You feel that image, you protect that image, and +you think the whole world exists for it. This is a delirium, a madness. This is not reality. +The world is not existing for you. No one is concerned with your ego; no one at all. +Whether you are or you are not, it makes no difference. You are just a wave. The wave +comes and goes; the ocean is not worried about it. + +But you think yourself very important. + +Those who want to dissolve the ego have first to recognize this fact. And unless you can +put aside your egoistic structure, you will not be able to see the reality, because +whatsoever you see, whatsoever you perceive, your ego distorts it. It tries to manipulate +everything for itself. And nothing is for it, because reality cannot help anything which is +false. Remember that. + +Reality cannot support anything which is not, and your ego is the most impossible thing, +the greatest falsity. It is not there; it is your creation, your imaginative creation. The +reality cannot help it. The reality is always shattering it, always destroying it. Whenever +your ego comes in contact with reality, the reality proves shocking. Just to defend +yourself against these shocks which are always coming, continuously coming to destroy +your ego, by and by you avoid seeing reality. + +Rather than lose your ego, you try to avoid seeing the reality. And then around your ego +you create a false world which you think is the reality. Then you live in your own world. +You are not in contact with the real world, you cannot be, because you are afraid. You +are living in a glasshouse of the ego. The fear is there: whenever the reality comes in +contact, your ego may be destroyed, so it is better not to come in contact with the reality. +We go on escaping from reality just to protect, to defend, this impossible ego. + + +Why do I call it impossible? Why do I say it is false? Try to understand this. The reality + + + +is one: the reality exists as a whole, as a totality. You cannot exist alone, or can you? If +the trees are not existing you will not be able to exist, because they are producing oxygen +for you. If the air disappears you will simply die, because that air is giving you vitality, +life. If the sun goes out you will be no more here, because thew warmth, the rays, they +are your life. + +Life exists as a cosmic totality. You are not alone, and you cannot exist alone. You exist +in a world. You exist not as an atomic, separate, isolated existence; you exist in the +cosmic whole as a wave. You are interrelated. And the ego gives you the feeling that you +are individual, alone, separate, isolated. The ego gives you the feeling that you are in +island — you are not. That's why the ego is false. It is unreal, and the reality cannot +support it. + +So there are only two ways. If you come in contact with reality, if you become open to it, +your ego will dissolve. Or, you have to create your own dream-world, and then live in it. +And you have created that world. Everyone is living in his own dream. + +People come to me and I look at them, and I see that they are fast asleep, dreaming. Their +problems are out of their dreams, and they want to solve them. They cannot be solved +because they are not real. + +How can you solve an unreal problem? If it exists, it can be solved — but it is nowhere; it +cannot be solved. An unreal problem — how can it be solved? It can be solved only by an +unreal answer. But that unreal answer will create other problems which again will be +unreal. And then you fall ad nauseum; there is no end to it. + +If you want to come to meet reality.... And to meet reality is to meet God. God is not +something hidden somewhere in the sky; it is the reality around you. God is not hidden; +you are hidden in an unreality. God is the nearest immediate presence, but you are hidden +in a capsule of your own unreal world and you go on protecting it — and the center of it is +the ego. + +The ego is unreal, because you are not isolated; you are one with reality. You exist as an +organic part of it. You cannot be separated from it. If separated, not even for a single +moment can you be alive. Every breath, and you are bridged with the cosmos; every +moment you are moving in and out, meeting the real and coming back. + +You are a pulsation, not a dead entity, and that pulsation exists in a deep hannony with +the real. But you have forgotten that pulsation. You have created a dead ego, a concept — +I AM — and this I AM is always against the whole: defending itself, struggling, in +conflict, in war. Hence the emphasis of all religions to dissolve the ego. + +The first thing: it is unreal; that's why it can be dissolved. + +Nothing real can be dissolved. How can you dissolve it? If something is real, it cannot be +destroyed; it will remain. And it will remain whatsoever you do. Only unreal things can +be dissolved. They can disappear, they can simply evaporate into nowhere, into +nothingness. Your ego can dissolve because it is unreal. It is just a thought, a notion; it +has no substance to it. + +Secondly: you cannot even carry this ego continuously for twenty-four hours. It is so +unreal that you have to constantly fuel it, feed it. While you are asleep, the ego is not +there. That's why in the morning you feel so fresh, because you have been in a deep +contact with reality. The reality has rejuvenated you, revitalized you. + +In deep sleep, your ego is not. Your name, your form, all have dissolved. You don’t know +who you are — educated or uneducated, poor or rich, a sinner or a saint — you don’t know. + + + +In deep sleep you have fallen back to the cosmic whole; the ego is not there. In the +morning you feel vitalized, fresh, young. Energy has come to you from some deep +source. You are again alive. But if in the night there are dreams and dreams and dreams, +in the morning you feel tired because in the dreams the ego persists. In the dreams the +ego persists, it is there, so it is not allowing you to fall into the original source. You will +feel tired in the morning. + +In deep sleep, the ego is not. + +When you are in deep love, the ego is not. When you are relaxed, silent, the ego is not. +When you are absorbed in something so totally that you have forgotten, the ego is not. +Listening to music, you have forgotten that you are — the ego is not. And really, the +peace that comes to you is not coming through music; it is coming because you have +forgotten the ego. The music is instrumental. + +Looking at a beautiful sunrise or sunset, you forget yourself. Then suddenly you feel that +something has happened to you. You are not there; something greater than you is there. +This presence of the great... Jesus calls it God — that word is just symbolic. Mohammed +calls it God — that word is just symbolic. 'God’ means greater than you — a moment when +you feel that something greater than you is happening to you. And you can feel this only +when you are not. While you are there, the greater cannot happen to you, because you are +the barrier. + +In any moment, if you are absent, the God is present there. Your absence is the presence +of the divine. Remember it always: your absence is the presence of the divine; your +presence is the absence of the divine. So really the question is not how to reach God, the +question is not how to attain God; the question is how to be absent. + +You need not worry about the divine, you can forget it completely. There is no need to +remember even the word god. + +It is irrelevant, because the basic thing is not God, the basic thing is your ego. If it is not +there, God happens to you. And if you try, if you make effort to reach God, to attain God, +or to be liberated, you may miss, because this whole effort may be ego-centered. + +That’s the problem for the spiritual seeker. It may be just the ego which is thinking to +attain God. You cannot be satisfied by your worldly successes. You have achieved; in the +outer world you have reached a certain status, position, prestige. You are powerful, you +are rich, knowledgeable, respected, but your ego is not satisfied. The ego is never +satisfied. And the reason? — the same. A real hunger can be satisfied. The hunger of the +ego is false; it cannot be satisfied. Whatsoever you do will be futile. Because the hunger +is false, no food can satisfy it. If the hunger is real, it can be satisfied. + +All natural hungers can be satisfied — it is nothing, not a problem at all — but unnatural +hungers cannot be satisfied. In the first place they are not hungers — how can you satisfy +them? And they are unreal; just emptiness exists there. You go on throwing food, and you +are throwing food into an abyss, a bottomless abyss. You will not reach anywhere. The +ego cannot be satisfied. + +I have heard that when Alexander was coming to India someone said to him, 'Have you +ever meditated upon the fact that there is only one world, and if you win it then what will +you do?’ + +And it is reported that upon hearing this Alexander became very sad and he said, 'I have +not thought about it, but it makes me very very sad. + + + +Really, there is only one world and I am going to win it. And when I have won it, what +am I going to do then?' + +Even this whole world will not quench your thirst, because the thirst is false, unreal. The +hunger is not natural. + +The ego can go in search of God. In almost ninety-nine cases out of a hundred this has +been my feeling — that the ego is in search. And then the search is bound to be doomed +from the very beginning, because the ego cannot meet the divine, and the ego is making +every effort to reach it. Remember well, your meditation, your prayer, your worship, +should not be an ego-trip. If it is, you are unnecessarily wasting your energy. So be +perfectly aware. + +And this is only a question of awareness. If you are aware, you can find out how your ego +moves and works. It is not difficult; no particular training is needed. You can close your +eyes and you can see what the search is. You can ask the question whether you are really +seeking the divine, or whether it is again just an ego-trip — because it is respectable, +because people think you are religious, because deep down you think, 'How can I be +satisfied — I — unless I possess God?’ + +Is God going to be your possession? The Upanishads say that one who says that he has +achieved God, has not achieved, because the very assertion that 'I have achieved God’, is +an ego-assertion. The Upanishads say that one who claims that he has known, has not +known. + +The very claim shows that he has not known, because the claim that 'I have known’, +comes from the ego. And the ego cannot know. The ego is the only barrier. + +Now we will enter the techniques. First: + +FEEL: + +MY THOUGHT, + +I-NESS, + +INTERNAL ORGANS +- ME. + +A very simple and a very beautiful technique. Feel: MY THOUGHT, I-NESS, +INTERNAL ORGANS — ME. The first thing is not to think but to feel. These are two +different dimensions. And we have become so intellect-oriented that even when we say +that we are feeling, really we are not feeling, we are thinking. Feeling has completely +stopped; it has become a dead organ in you. Even when you say, 'I love,’ it is not a +feeling, it is again a thought. + +And what is the difference between feeling and thought? If you feel, you will feel +yourself centered near the heart. If I say, 'I love you,’ this very feeling of love will flow +from my heart, the center will be near the heart. If it is just a thought, it will come from +my head. When you love someone, try to feel whether it is coming from the head, or +whether it is coming from the heart. + +Whenever you deeply feel, you are headless. In that moment there is no head; there +cannot be. The heart becomes your whole being — as if the head has disappeared. In +feeling, the center of being is the heart. + +While you are thinking, the center of being is the head. But thinking proved very useful + + + +for survival, so we have stopped everything else. All other dimensions of our being have +been stopped and closed. We are just heads, and the body is just a situation for the head +to exist. We go on thinking; even about feelings we go on thinking. So try to feel. You +will have to work on it, because that capacity, that quality, has remained retarded. You +must do something to re-open that possibility. + +You look at a flower and immediately you say it is beautiful. Ponder over the fact, linger +over the fact. Don’t give a hurried judgement. Wait — and then see whether it is just from +the head that you have said it is beautiful, or whether you have felt it. Is it just a routine +thing, because you know a rose is beautiful, supposed to be beautiful? People say it is +beautiful, and you have also said many times that it is beautiful. + +The moment you see the rose, the mind supplies you; the mind says it is beautiful. +Finished. Now there is no contact with the rose. There is no need; you have said. Now +you can move to something else. Without any communion with the rose... the mind didn’t +allow you even a glimpse of the rose. The mind came in between, and the heart couldn’t +come in touch with the rose. Only the heart can say whether it is beautiful or not, because +beauty is a feeling, it is not a concept. + + +You cannot say from the head that it is beautiful. How can you say? Beauty is not +mathematics, it is not measurable. And beauty is not really just in the rose, because to +someone else it may not be beautiful at all; and someone else may just pass without +looking at it; and to someone else it may even be ugly. The beauty doesn’t exist simply in +the rose; the beauty exists in a meeting of the heart with the rose. When the heart meets +with the rose, beauty flowers. When the heart comes in deep contact with anything it is a +great phenomenon. + +If you come in deep contact with any person, the person becomes beautiful. The deeper +the contact, the more beauty is revealed. But beauty is a phenomenon that happens to the +heart, not to the mind. It is not a calculation, and there is no criterion by which to judge +it. It is a feeling. + +So if I say, 'This rose is not beautiful,' you cannot argue about it. There is no need to +argue. You will say, 'That is your feeling. And the rose is beautiful — this is my feeling.’ +There is no question of argument. Heads can argue. Hearts cannot argue. It is finished, it +is a full stop. If I say, 'This is my feeling,’ then there is no question of argument. + +With the head, argument can continue and we can come to a conclusion. With the heart, +the conclusion has already happened. With the heart, there is no procedure towards the +conclusion; the conclusion is immediate, instantaneous. + +With the head, it is a process — you argue, you discuss, you analyze, and then you come +to a conclusion about whether this is so or not. With the heart, it is an immediate +phenomenon — the conclusion comes first. Look at it: with the head, conclusion comes in +the end. With the heart, conclusion comes first, and then you can proceed to find the +process — but that is the work of the head. + +So when such techniques have to be practised, the first difficulty will be that you don’t +know what feeling is. Try to develop it. When you touch something, close your eyes; +don’t think, feel. For example, if I take your hand in my hand and I say to you, 'Close +your eyes and feel what is happening,’ immediately you will say, 'Your hand is in my +hand.’ But this is not a feeling, this is a thinking. + +Then I again say to you, 'Feel. Don’t think.’ Then you say, 'You are expressing your + + + +love.’ That too is again thinking. If I insist again, 'Just feel, don’t use your head. What are +you feeling right now?’ only then will you be able to feel and say, 'The warmth.’ Because +love is a conclusion. 'Your hand is in my hand’ — this is a head-oriented thought. + +The actual feeling is that a certain warmth is flowing from my hand to your hand, or from +your hand to my hand. Our life energies are meeting and the point of meeting has become +hot, it has become warm. This is the feeling, the sensation, the real. + +But we go on with the head continuously. That has become a habit; we are trained for it. +So you will have to re-open your heart. + +Try to live with feelings. Sometimes in the day when you are not doing any particular +business — because in business, in the beginning it will be difficult to live with feeling. +There, head has proved very efficient, and you cannot depend on feeling. While you are +at home playing with your children, the head is not needed, it is not a business — but +there too you are with the head. Playing with your children or just sitting with your wife, +or not doing anything, relaxing in a chair, feel. Feel the texture of the chair. + +Your hand is touching the chair: how are you feeling it? The air is blowing, the breeze is +coming in. It touches you. How do you feel? Smells are coming from the kitchen. How +do you feel? Just feel. Don’t think about them. Don’t start brooding that this smell shows +that something is being prepared in the kitchen — then you will start dreaming about it. +No, just feel whatsoever is the fact. Remain with the fact; don’t move in thinking. You are +surrounded from everywhere. Everywhere so much is converging on you. The whole +existence is coming to meet you from everywhere, from all your senses it is entering you, +but you are in the head, and your senses have become dead; they don’t feel. + +A certain growth will be needed before you can do this, because this is an inner +experiment. + +If you cannot feel the outer, it will be very difficult for you to feel the inner, because the +inner is the subtle. If you cannot feel the gross, you cannot feel the subtle. If you cannot +hear the sounds, then it will be difficult for you to hear the inner soundlessness — it will +be very difficult. It is so subtle. + +You are just sitting in the garden, the traffic is passing by and there are many noises and +many sounds. You just close your eyes and try to find the most subtle sound there around +you. A crow is cawing: just concentrate yourself on that crow's noise. The whole traffic +noise is going on. The sound is such, it is so subtle, that you cannot be aware of it unless +you focus your awareness towards it. But if you focus your awareness, the whole traffic +noise will go far away and the noise of the crow will become the center. And you will +hear it, all the nuances of it — very subtle, but you will be able to hear it. + +Grow in sensitivity. When you touch, when you hear, when you eat, when you take a +bath, allow your senses to be open. And don't think — feel. + +You are standing under the shower: feel the coolness of the water falling on you. Don’t +think about it. Don’t immediately say, 'It is very cool. It is cold. It is good.’ Don’t say +anything. Don’t verbalize, because the moment you verbalize, you miss feeling. The +moment words come in, the mind has started to function. + +Don’t verbalize. Feel the coolness and don’t say that it is cool. There is no need to say +anything. But our minds are just mad; we go on saying something or other. + +I remember, I was working in a university, and there was a lady professor who would +always be saying something or other. It was impossible for her to be silent in any + + + +situation. One day I was standing on the verandah of the college and the sun was setting. +It was tremendously beautiful. And she was just standing by my side, so I told her, +'Look!' She was saying something or other, so I said, 'Look! Such a beautiful sunset.’ So, +very reluctantly she conceded. She said, 'Yes, but don’t you think there should be a little +more purple just on the left?’ It was not a painting; it was a real sunset! + +We go on saying things, not even aware of what we are saying. Stop verbalizing; only +then can you deepen your feelings. If feelings are deepened, then this technique can work +miracles for you. + +FEEL: + +MY THOUGHT, + +Close your eyes and feel the thought. A continuous flow of thoughts is there, a +continuum, a flux; a river of thoughts is flowing. Feel these thoughts, feel their presence. +And the more you feel, the more will be revealed to you — layers upon layers. Not only +thoughts that are just on the surface; behind them there are more thoughts, and behind +them there are still more thoughts — layers upon layers. + + +And the technique says:FEEL: MY THOUGHT. And we go on saying, 'These are my +thoughts.’ But feel — are they really yours? Can you say 'my'? The more you feel, the less +will it be possible for you to say that they are yours. They are all borrowed, they are all +from the outside. They have come to you but they are not yours. No thought is yours — +just dust gathered. Even if you cannot recognize the source from where this thought has +come to you, no thought is yours. If you try hard, you can find from where this thought +has come to you. + +Only the inner silence is yours. No one has given it to you. You were born with it, and +you will die with it. Thoughts have been given to you; you have been conditioned to +them. If you are a Hindu, you have a different type, a different set of thoughts; if you are +a Mohammedan, of course, a different set of thoughts; if you are a communist, again a +different set of thoughts. They have been given to you, or you may have taken them +voluntarily, but no thought is yours. + +If you feel the presence of thoughts, the crowd, you can feel this also — that they are not +yours. The crowd has come to you, it has gathered around you, but it doesn’t belong to +you. And if this can be felt — that no thought is mine — only then you can throw the +mind. If they are yours, you will defend them. And the very feeling that 'this thought is +mine’ is the attachment. + +Then I give it roots in myself. Then I become the soil and the thought can remain rooted +in me. If anything that I can see is not mine is uprooted, then I am not attached to it. The +feeling of 'mine’ creates attachment. + +You can fight for your thoughts, you can even become a martyr for your thoughts. Or, +you can become a killer, a murderer for your thoughts. And thoughts are not yours. +Consciousness is yours, but thoughts are not yours. And why will this help? — because if +you can see that thoughts are not yours, then nothing is yours because thought is the root +of all. The house is mine and the property is mine and the family is mine — these are the +outer things. Deep down the thoughts are mine. Only if thoughts are mine can all these +things, the superstructure, be mine. + + + +If thoughts are not mine then nothing matters, because this too is a thought — that you are +my wife, or you are my husband. This too is a thought. And if basically thought itself is +not mine, then how can the husband be mine? Or how can the wife be mine? Thoughts +uprooted, the whole world is uprooted. Then you can live in the world and not live in it. +You can move to the Himalayas, you can leave the world, but if you think that your +thoughts are yours, you have not moved a single inch. Sitting there in the Himalayas, you +will be as much in the world as here because thoughts are the world. + +You carry your thoughts to the Himalayas. You leave the house — but the real house is +inner, and the real house is built by the bricks of thought. It is not the outer house. + +So this is strange, but this happens every day: I see a person who has left the world but +still he remains a Hindu. He becomes a sannyasin and still he remains a Hindu or remains +a Jain. What does it mean? He renounces the world but he doesn't renounce the thoughts. +He is still a Jain, he is still a Hindu — the thought-world is carried still. And that thought- +world is the real world. + +If you can see that no thought is yours.... And you will see, because you will be the seer +and thoughts will become the objects. When you silently look at the thoughts, thoughts +will be the objects and you will be the looker. You will be the seer, the witness, and +thoughts will be flowing before you. + +And if you look deeply and feel deeply, you will see that there are no roots. Thoughts are +floating like clouds in the sky; they have no roots in you. They come and go. You are just +a victim, and you unnecessarily become identified with them. About every cloud that +passes by your house you say, 'This is my cloud.’ Thoughts are like clouds: in the sky of +your consciousness they go on passing and you go on clinging to each one. You say, + +'This is mine’ — and this is only a vagrant cloud that is passing. And it will pass. + + +Go back in your childhood. You had certain thoughts, and you used to cling to them and +you used to say that they were your thoughts. Then the childhood disappeared, and with +that childhood those clouds disappeared. Now you don’t even remember. Then you were +young: then other clouds which are attracted when you are young came to you and then +your started clinging to them. + +Now you are old: those thoughts are no more there, you don’t even remember them. And +they were so significant that you could have died for them, and now you don’t even +remember. Now you can laugh at the whole nonsense that you once thought that you +could die for them, you could become a martyr for them. Now you are not ready to even +give a single penny for them. They don’t belong to you now. Now those clouds have gone +but other clouds have come, and you are clinging to them. + +Clouds go on changing but your clinging never changes. That’s the problem. And it is not +that only when you are no longer a child they will change; every moment they are +changing. A minute ago you were filled with certain clouds; now you are filled with other +clouds. When you came here, certain clouds were hovering on you; when you leave this +room, other clouds will be hovering on you — and you go on clinging to every cloud. If in +the end you find nothing in your hand, it is natural because nothing can come of clouds — +and thoughts are just clouds. + + + +This sutra says: FEEL. Be established in feeling first. Then MY THOUGHT. Look at that +thought which you have always been calling MY — MY THOUGHT. Established in +feeling, looking at thought, the MY disappears. And MY is the trick because out of many +MY’S, out of many ME’S, the I evolves — this is MINE, this is MY. So many MINE'S; +out of them the I evolves. + +This technique starts from the very root. Thought is the root of all. If you can cut the +feeling of MY at the very root, it will not appear again, it will not be seen anywhere +again. But if you don’t cut it down there, you can go on cutting everywhere and it is +useless; it will go on appearing again and again. + +I can cut it. I can say, 'My wife? No, we are strangers, and marriage is just a social +formality.’ I cut myself away. I say, 'No one is my wife’ — but this is very superficial. +Then I say, 'MY religion,’ Then I say, 'MY sect.’ Then I say, 'This is MY religious book. +This is the Bible. This is the Koran. This is MY book.’ Then the MY continues in some +other field and you remain the same. + +MY THOUGHT, and then I-NESS. First look at the traffic of thought, the process of +thought, the river-like flow of thought, and find out whether any thought belongs to you +or whether they are just passing clouds. And when you have come to feel that no thought +is yours, to attach MY to any thought is an illusion, then the second thing; then you can +move deeper. + +Then be aware of I-ness. Where is this I? + +Raman used to give a technique to his disciples: they were just to enquire, 'Who am I?’ In +Tibet they use a similar technique, but still better than Raman's. They don’t ask, 'Who am +I?’ They ask, 'Where am I?’ — because the WHO can create a problem. When you +enquire, 'Who am I?’ you take it for granted that you are; the only question is to know +who you are. You have presupposed that you are. That is not contested. It is taken for +granted that you are. Now the only question is WHO you are. Only the identity is to be +known, the face is to be recognized, but it is there — unrecognized it is there. + +The Tibetan method is still deeper. They say to be silent and then search within for where +you are. Go on in the inner space, move to every point and ask, 'Where am I?’ You will +not find it anywhere. And the more you seek, the more it will not be there. And asking +'Who am I?’ or 'Where am I?’ a moment comes when you come to a point where you are, +but no I — a simple existence has happened to you. But it will happen only when thoughts +are not yours. That is a deeper realm — I-NESS. + +We never feel it. We go on saying I. The word I is used continuously — the most used +word is I — but you have no feeling. What do you mean by I? When you say I, what do +you mean? What is connoted through this word? What is expressed? I can make a +gesture. + +Then I can say, 'I mean this.’ I can show my body — 'I mean this.’ But then it can be +asked, 'Do you mean your hand? Do you mean your leg? Do you mean your stomach?’ +Then I will have to deny, I will have to say no. Then the whole body will be denied. Then +what do you mean when you say I? Do you mean your head? Deep down, whenever you +say I, it is a very vague feeling, and the vague feeling is of your thoughts. + +Established in feeling, cut from thoughts, face I-ness, and as you face it, you find that it +exists not. It was only a useful word, a linguistic symbol — necessary, but not real. Even a +Buddha has to use it, even after his enlightenment. It is just a linguistic device. But when +a Buddha says I, he never means I, because there is no one. + + + +When you face this I-NESS it will disappear. Fear can grip you at this moment, you can +be scared. And it happens to many who move in such techniques deeply that they become +so afraid that they run out of it. So remember this: when you feel and face your I-NESS +you will be in the same situation as you will be when you die — the same. Because I is +disappearing, and you feel death is occurring to you. You will have a sinking sensation, +you will feel you are sinking down and down. And if you get afraid, you will come out +again and you will cling to thoughts because those thoughts will be helpful. Those clouds +will be there: you can cling to them, and then the fear will leave you. + + +Remember, this fear is very good, a very hopeful sign. It shows that now you are going +deep — and death is the deepest point. If you can go into death you will become +deathless, because one who goes into death cannot die. Then death is also just around; +never in the center, just on the periphery. When I-NESS disappears you are just like +death. The old is no more and the new has come into being. + +This consciousness which will come out is absolutely new, uncontaminated, young, +virgin. The old is no more — and the old has not even touched it. That I-NESS disappears, +and you are in your pristine virginity, in your absolute freshness. The deepest layer of +being has been touched. + +So think of it in this way: thoughts, then below them I-NESS, and thirdly: + +FEEL: + +MY THOUGHT, + +I-NESS, + +INTERNAL ORGANS +- ME. + +When thoughts have disappeared or you are not clinging to them — if they are passing it +is none of your business, you are aloof and detached and unidentified, and the I-NESS +has disappeared — then you can look at the internal organs. These internal organs.... This +is one of the deepest things. We know the outer organs. With hands I touch you, with +eyes I see you — these are the outer organs. + +The internal organs are those through which I feel my own being. The outer are for +others. + +I know about you through the outer. How do I know about me? Even that I am — how do +I know about it? Who gives me the sensation of my own being? There are internal +organs. When thoughts have stopped and when I-NESS is no more, only then, in that +purity, in that clarity, can you see the internal organs. + +Consciousness, intelligence — they are internal organs. Through them I am aware of my +own being, of my own existence. That's why if you close your eyes, you can forget your +body completely, but your own feeling that you are, remains. And it is conceivable that +when a person dies.... It is a fact. When a person dies, for us he is dead, but it takes a little +time for him to recognize the fact that he is dead because the internal feeling of being, +remains the same. + +In Tibet they have special exercises for dying and they say one must be ready to die. One +of the exercises is this: whenever someone is dying, the master or the priest or someone +who knows the bardo exercises will go on saying to him, 'Remember, be alert, you are + + + +leaving the body.’ Because even when you have left the body it will take time to +recognize that you are dead because the internal feeling remains the same; there is no +change. + +The body is only to touch and feel others. Through it you have never touched yourself, +through it you have never known yourself. You know yourself through some other organs +which are internal. + +But this is the misery — that we are not aware of those internal organs and our image in +our own eyes is created by others. Whatsoever others say about me is my knowledge +about myself. If they say I am beautiful or if they say I am ugly, I believe in it. +Whatsoever my senses say to me through others, reflected through others, is my belief of +myself. + +If you can recognize the internal organs you are freed from society completely. That is +what is meant when it is said in old scriptures that a sannyasin is not part of the society, +because now he knows himself through his own internal organs. Now his knowledge +about himself is not based upon others, it is not a reflected thing. Now he doesn't need +any mirror to know himself. He has found the inner mirror, and he knows through the +inner mirror. And the inner reality can be known only when you have come to the inner +organs. + +INTERNAL ORGANS. You can then look through those internal organs. And then — the +ME. It is difficult to express it in words, that's why ME is used. Any word will be wrong + +— ME is also wrong — but the I has disappeared. So remember, this ME doesn’t have +anything to do with I. When thoughts are uprooted, when I-NESS has disappeared, when +internal organs are known, the ME appears. Then for the first time my real being is +revealed — that real being is called ME. + +The outer world is no more, thoughts are no more, the feeling of ego is no more, and I +have come to recognize my own internal organs of knowing, consciousness, intelligence + +— or whatsoever you call it — awareness, alertness. + +Then, in the light of this internal organ, ME is revealed. + +This ME doesn’t belong to you. This ME is your innermost center, unknown to you. This +ME is not an ego. This ME is not against any YOU. This ME is cosmic. This Me has no +boundaries. In this ME everything is implied. This ME is not the wave. This ME is the +ocean. + +FEEL: MY THOUGHT, I-NESS, INTERNAL ORGANS. Then there is a gap, and +suddenly the ME is revealed. When this ME is revealed, then one comes to know, ' Aham +Brahmasmi. I am the God.’ This knowing is not any claim of the ego; the ego is no more +there. You can mutate yourself through this technique, but first get established in feeling. + +The second technique: + +BEFORE DESIRE AND BEFORE KNOWING, + +HOW CAN I SAY I AM? + +CONSIDER. + +DISSOLVE IN THE BEAUTY. + +BEFORE DESIRE AND BEFORE KNOWING, HOW CAN I SAY I AM? + +A desire arises: with the desire, the feeling that I AM arises. A thought arises: with the + + + +thought, the feeling that I AM arises. Look for it in your own experience. Before desire +and before knowing, there is no ego. + +Sit silently. Look within. A thought arises: you get identified with the thought. A desire +arises: you get identified with the desire. In the identification you become the ego. Then +think: there is no desire and there is no knowledge and no thought — you cannot get +identified with anything. + +The ego cannot arise. + +Buddha used this technique and he said to his disciples not do anything else but just one +thing: when a thought arises, not it down. Buddha used to say that when a thought arises, +note down that a thought is arising. Just inside, note it: now a thought is arising, now a +thought has arises, now a thought is disappearing. Just remember that now the thought is +arising, now the thought has arisen, now the thought is disappearing, so that you don't get +identified with it. + +It is very beautiful and very simple. A desire arises. You are walking on the road; a +beautiful car passes by. You look at it — and you have not even looked and the desire to +possess it arises. Do it. In the beginning just verbalize; just say slowly, 'I have seen a car. +It is beautiful. Now a desire has arisen to possess it.’ Just verbalize. + +In the beginning it is good; if you can say it loudly, it is very good. Say loudly, 'I am just +noting that a car has passed, the mind has said it is beautiful, and now desire has arisen +and I must possess this car.’ Verbalize everything, speak loudly to yourself and +immediately you will feel that you are different from it. Note it. + +When you have become efficient in noting, there is no need to say it loudly. Just inside, +note that a desire has arisen. A beautiful woman passes; the desire has come in. Just note +it — as if you are not concerned, you are just noting the fact that is happening — and then +suddenly you will be out of it. + + +Buddha says, 'Note down whatsoever happens. Just go on noting, and when it disappears, +again note that now that desire has disappeared, and you will feel a distance from the +desire, from the thought.' + +This technique says: + +BEFORE DESIRE AND BEFORE KNOWING, + +HOW CAN I SAY I AM? + +And if there is no desire and if there is no thought, how can you say I AM? How can I +say I AM? Then everything is silent, not a ripple is there. And without any ripple how +can I create this illusion of I? If some ripple is there I can get attached to it and through it +I can feel I AM. When there is no ripple in the consciousness, there is no I. + +So before desire, remember; when the desire comes in, remember; when the desire goes +out, go on remembering. When a thought arises, remember. Look at it. Just note that a +thought has arisen. Sooner or later it will go because everything is momentary, and there +will be a gap. Between two thoughts there is a gap, between two desires there is a gap, +and in the gap there is no I. + +Note a thought in the mind and then you will feel that there is an interval. Howsoever +small, there is an interval. Then another thought comes; then again there is an interval. In +those intervals there is no I — and those intervals are your real being. Thoughts are + + + +moving in the sky. In those intervals you can look between two clouds, and the sky is +revealed. + + +CONSIDER. + +DISSOLVE IN THE BEAUTY. + +And if you can consider that a desire has arisen and a desire has gone and you have +remained in the gap and the desire has not disturbed you.... It came, it went. It was there, +and it is now not there, and you have remained unperturbed, you have remained as you +were before it. There has been no change in you. It came and it passed like a shadow. It +has not touched you; you remain unscarred. + +Consider this movement of desire and movement of thought but no movement in you. +CONSIDER AND DISSOLVE IN THE BEAUTY. And that interval is beautiful. +Dissolve in that interval. Fall in the gap and be the gap. It is the deepest experience of +beauty. And not only of beauty, but of good and of truth also. In the gap you are. + +The whole emphasis has to go from the filled spaces to the unfilled spaces. You are +reading a book. There are words, there are sentences, but between the words there are +gaps, between the sentences there are gaps. In those gaps you are. The whiteness of the +paper you are, and the black dots are just clouds of thought and desire moving on you. +Change the emphasis, change the gestalt. Don't look at the black dots. Look at the white. +In your inner being, look at the gaps. Be indifferent to the filled spaces, the occupied +spaces. Be interested in the gaps, the intervals. Through those intervals you can dissolve +into the ultimate beauty. + + +THE END. + + + +Chapter 56: Discovering the emptiness + + +Question 1 + +IN MEDITATION, WHEN THE T DROPS TEMPORARILY AND AN EMPTINESS +IS CREATED WITHIN, AFTER IT A FRUSTRATION IS FELT WHEN THAT +EMPTINESS IS NOT FILLED BY THE ENTRY OF THE UNKNOWN. HOW CAN +ONE LEARN TO LIVE WITH THAT EMPTINESS? + +Emptiness is the unknown. Don’t wait and don't hope that something is going to fill the +emptiness. If you are waiting, hoping, desiring, you are not empty. If you are waiting that +something, some unknown force, will descend upon you, you are not empty — this hope +is there, this desire is there, this longing is there. So don’t desire for something to fill you. +Simply be empty. Don’t even wait. + +Emptiness is the unknown. When you are really empty the unknown has descended upon +you. It is not that first you become empty and then the unknown enters. You are empty, +and the unknown has entered. There is not a single moment's gap. The emptiness and the +unknown are one. + +In the beginning it appears to you as emptiness; that is only appearance, because you +have always been filled by the ego. Really, you are feeling the absence of the ego; that's +why you feel empty. First the ego disappears — but the feeling that the ego is no more +creates the feeling of emptiness. Just the absence... something was there, and now it is not +there. The ego has gone, but the absence of the ego is felt. First the ego will disappear, +and then the absence of the ego will disappear. + +Only then will you be really empty. And to be really empty is to be really filled. + +That inner space which is created by the absence of the ego is the divine. The divine is +not to come from somewhere else; you are already that. Because you are filled with the +ego you cannot realize it, you cannot see it, you cannot touch it. A filmy barrier of the +ego prevents you. + +When the ego has dropped, the barrier has dropped. The curtain is no more there. + +Nothing is to come; whatsoever is to come is already there. Remember this: that nothing +new is going to come to you. Whatsoever is possible is already there, actual. So the +question is not of achieving; the question is only of discovering. The treasure is there, +just covered — you uncover it. + +When he became a realized man, Buddha was asked so many times, 'What have you +gained? What have you achieved?’ + +Buddha is reported to have said, 'I have not achieved anything. Rather, on the contrary, I +have lost myself. And that which I have achieved was already there, so I cannot say I +have achieved it. I was unaware of it. Now I have become aware. But I cannot say I have +achieved it. Rather, on the contrary, now I wonder how it was possible that I didn’t know +it before. And it was always there just by the corner — just a turning was needed.’ + +The divinity is not a future. Your divinity is the present. It is here and now. + +This very moment you are that — unaware, not looking in the right direction, or not tuned +to it, that’s all. + +A radio is there: the waves are passing right now, but if the radio is not tuned to a +particular wave, the wave is unmanifest. You tune the radio and the wave becomes + + + +manifest. A tuning is needed. Meditation is a tuning. When you are tuned, that which is +unmanifest becomes manifest. + +But remember, don't desire, because the desire will not allow you to be empty. And if you +are not empty nothing is possible, because the space is not there, so your own unmanifest +nature cannot be revealed. It needs space to be revealed. And don’t ask how to live with +emptiness. That is not the real question. Just be empty. You are not yet empty. + +If once you know what emptiness is, you will love it. It is ecstatic. It is the most beautiful +experience possible to mind, to man, to consciousness. You will not ask how to live with +emptiness. You are asking that as if emptiness is something like a misery. It appears so to +the ego. The ego is always afraid of emptiness, so you ask how to live with it as if it is +some enemy. + +Emptiness is your innermost center. All the activity is on the periphery; the innennost +center is just a zero. All the manifest is on the periphery; the deepest core of your being is +the unmanifest vacuum. Buddha has given it a name — shunyata. + +It means nothingness or emptiness. That’s your nature, that’s your being, and out of that +nothingness everything comes, and everything goes back to it. + +That emptiness is the source. Don’t ask to fill it, because whenever you ask to fill it you +will create more and more ego — ego is the effort to fill the emptiness. And even this +desire that now something must descend upon you — a god, a divinity, a divine power, +some unknown energy — this is again a thought. Whatsoever you can think about God is +not going to be God; it is simply going to be a thought. + +When you say the unknown, you have made it the known. What do you know about the +unknown? Even to say that it is the unknown, you have known some quality about it — +the quality of its being unknown. The mind cannot conceive the unknown. Even the +unknown becomes known, and whatsoever the mind says is going to be just a +verbalization, a thought process. + +God is not the word 'God’. The thought of God is not God. Ans when there is no thought, +only then will you come to feel and realize what it is. Nothing else can be said about it. It +can only be indicated. And all indications are erroneous because they are all indirect. + +This much can be said — that when you are not.... And you are not, only when there is no +desire, because you exist with desire. Desire is the food through which you exist. Desire +is the fuel. + +When there is no desire, no longing, no future, and when you are not, that emptiness is +the fullness of existence. In that emptiness the whole existence is revealed to you. You +become it. + +So don’t ask how to live with emptiness. First be empty. There is no need to ask how to +live with it. It is so blissful — the deepest bliss it is. When you ask how to live with +emptiness, you are really asking how to live with oneself. But you have not known +yourself. Enter more and more into it. + +In meditation sometimes you feel a sort of emptiness; that is not really emptiness. I call it +just a sort of emptiness. When you are meditating, for certain moments, for a few seconds +you will feel as if the thought process has stopped. In the beginning these gaps will come. +But because you are feeling as if the thought process has stopped, this is again a thought +process, a very subtle thought process. What are you doing? You are saying inside, 'The +thought process has stopped.’ But what is this? This is a secondary thought process which +has started. And you say, 'This is emptiness.’ You say, 'Now something is going to + + + +happen.’ What is this? Again a new thought process has started. + +Whenever this happens again, don't become a victim of it. When you feel a certain +silence is descending, don't start verbalizing it, because you are destroying it. Wait — not +for something — simply wait. + +Don't do anything. Don't say, 'This is emptiness.’ The moment you have said, you have +destroyed it. Just look at it, penetrate into it, encounter it, but wait — don’t verbalize it. +What is the hurry? Through verbalization the mind has again entered from a different +route, and you are deceived. Be alert about this trick of the mind. + +In the beginning it is bound to happen, so whenever this happens again, just wait. Don’t +fall in the trap. Don’t say anything — remain silent. Then you will enter, and then it will +not be temporary, because once you have known the real emptiness you cannot lose it. +The real cannot be lost; that is its quality. + +Once you have known the inner treasure, once you have come in contact with your +deepest core, then you can move in activity, then you can do whatsoever you like, then +you can live an ordinary worldly life, but the emptiness will remain with you. You cannot +forget it. It will go on inside. The music of it will be heard. Whatsoever you are doing, +the doing will be only on the periphery; inside you will remain empty. + +And if you can remain empty inside, doing only on the periphery, whatsoever you do +becomes divine, whatsoever you do takes on the quality of the divine because now it is +not coming from you. Now it is coming directly from the original emptiness, the original +nothingness. If then you speak, those words are not yours. + +That’s what Mohammed means when he says, 'This Koran is not said by me. It has come +to me as if someone else has spoken through me.’ It has come out of the inner emptiness. +That’s what Hindus mean when they say, 'The Vedas are not written by man, they are not +human documents, but the divine, the God himself has spoken.’ + +These are symbolic ways of saying something which is very mysterious. And this is the +mystery: when you are deeply empty, whatsoever you do or speak is not from you — +because you are no more. It comes from the emptiness. It comes from the deepest source +of existence. It comes from the same source from which this whole existence has come. +Then you have entered the womb, the very womb of existence. Then your words are not +yours, then your acts are not yours. It is as if you are just an instrument — an instrument +of the whole. + +If emptiness is felt only momentarily, and then it comes and goes like a flash, it is not +real. And if you start thinking about it, even the unreal is lost. Not to think in that +moment takes great courage. It is the greatest control I know. When the mind becomes +silent and when you are falling empty, it takes the greatest courage not to think, because +the whole past of the mind will assert. The whole mechanism will say, 'Now think!’ + +In subtle ways, indirect ways, your past memories will force you to think — and if you +think, you have come back. + +If you can remain silent in that moment, if you are not tempted by the mechanism of your +memory and mind.... This is really the satan — your own mind which tempts you. +Whenever you are falling empty, the mind tempts you and creates something to think +about — and if you start thinking, you are back. + +It is said that when one of the great masters, Bodhidhanna, went to China, many disciples +gathered around him. He was the first Zen master. One disciple, who was to become his + + + +chief disciple, came to him and said, 'Now I have become totally empty.’ + +Bodhidharma slapped him immediately and said, 'Now go and throw this emptiness also! +Now you are filled with emptiness — throw this also. Only then will you be really empty. +You understand? You can be filled by the idea of emptiness. Then it will hover on you, it +will become a cloud. He said, 'Throw this emptiness also, and then come to me.’ If you +say you are empty, you are not empty. Now this word 'empty' has become meaningful +and you are filled with it. The same I say to you — throw this emptiness also. + +Question 2 + +YOU HAVE TALKED ABOUT TRANSFORMATION AND MUTATION OF MAN’S +MIND, OF MAN’S UNCONSCIOUS INTO SUPERCONSCIOUS, AND YOU HAVE +SAID THAT SPIRITUALITY IS AN EXISTENTIAL EXPERIMENTATION. BUT +LAST NIGHT YOU SAID THAT THE EGO IS A FALSE ENTITY AND IT HAS NO +SUBSTANCE AND REALITY TO IT. THEN DOES IT MEAN THAT THE WHOLE +SPIRITUAL EXPERIMENTATION IS AN EXISTENTIAL TRANSFORMATION OF +THE EGO WHICH IS NON-EXISTENTIAL? + +No. + +The spiritual transfonnation is not the transformation of the ego; it is the dissolution of it. +You are not going to transform the ego, because howsoever transformed, the ego will +remain the ego. It may become superior, more refined, more cultured, but the ego will +remain the ego. And more cultured; it becomes more poisonous. The more subtle, the +more you will be in its grip, because you will not be able to be aware of it. You are not +even aware of such a gross ego. When it becomes subtle you will not be aware of it; there +will be no possibility. + +There are ways to refine the ego, but those ways are not of spirituality. Morality exists on +those methods. And that is the difference between morality and religion. Morality exists +on methods of refining the ego; morality exists on respectability. So we say to a person, +'Don't do this. If you do this, your respect is at stake. Don’t do this. What will others +think about you? Don’t do this. You will not be honored. Do this and everyone will honor +you.' + +The whole morality depends on your ego, a subtle ego. Religion is not a transfonnation +of the ego, it is a transcendence. You simply leave the ego. And it is not that you leave it +because it is wrong. Remember this distinction. Morality always says, 'Leave that which +is wrong, and do that which is right,’ Religion says, 'Leave that which is false — not +wrong, but false. + +Leave that which is unreal, and enter the real.’ With spirituality, truth is the value, not +right. Because right may itself be false, and in a false world we need false rights to +oppose wrongs. + +Spirituality is not a transfonnation of the ego, it is a transcendence. You go beyond the +ego. And this going beyond is really an awakening; it is a deep alertness to see whether +the ego exists or not. If it exists, if it is a part, a real part of your being, you cannot go +beyond it. If it is false, only then is transcendence possible. You can awaken out of a +dream. You cannot awaken out of reality, or can you? You can transcend a dream, but +you cannot transcend reality. + +The ego is a false entity. And what do we mean when we say that the ego is a false +entity? We mean that it exists only because you have not encountered it. If you encounter + + + +it, it will not exist. It exists in your ignorance; because you are not aware, it is there. If +you become aware, it will not be there. If you become aware and some entity disappears +just by your becoming aware, it means it was false. The real will be revealed in +awareness and the false will disappear. + +So really this too is not right to say — leave your ego — because whenever it is said to +leave your ego, it gives a sense that the ego is something and you can leave it. You can +even start struggling to throw this ego. The whole effort will be absurd. + +You cannot throw it, because only a reality can be thrown. You cannot fight with it. How +can you fight with a shadow? And if you fight, remember, you will be defeated. Not +because the shadow is very powerful, but because the shadow is not; you cannot defeat it. +You will be defeated by your own stupidity. + +Fight with a shadow and you cannot win — that is certain. You will be defeated. That too +is certain, because you will dissipate your own energy in the fight. Not that the shadow is +very powerful, but because the shadow is not. You are fighting with your own self, +wasting your energy. Then you will be exhausted and you will fall down. And you will +think that the shadow has won and you are defeated — and the shadow has not been there +at all. If you fight with the ego you will be defeated. Rather, enter and try to find out +where it is. + +It is said that the Emperor of China asked Bodhidharma, 'My mind is very restless. I am +in constant inner turmoil. Give me some peace or give me some secret key to how I can +enter into the inner silence.’ + +So Bodhidhanna said, 'You come early in the morning, four o'clock, when there is no +one here. When I am alone here in my hut you come. And remember, bring your restless +mind with you. Don't leave it at home.’ + +The king was very much disturbed, thinking that this man was mad. He says, 'Bring your +disturbed mind with you. + +Don’t leave it at home, otherwise who am I going to silence? I will make it still, but bring +it! Remember well.’ + +The emperor left, but more disturbed than ever. He had been thinking that this man was a +sage, a wise man, and he would give him some key, but whatsoever he said seemed to be +foolish — how can one leave one’s mind at home? He couldn’t sleep. The eyes of +Bodhidharma and the way he had looked at him... he was hypnotized — as if a magnet +was pulling. He couldn’t sleep the whole night, and at four he was ready. He didn’t really +want to go because this man was mad. And going so early, in darkness, when no one was +there — this man could do anything. + +But still, he was so attracted that in spite of himself he went. And the first thing that +Bodhidharma asked.... He was sitting before his hut with his staff in his hands, and he +said, 'Okay. So you have come. Where is your restless mind? Have you brought that? I +am ready to silence it.’ The emperor now said, 'What are you talking about? How can one +forget the mind? It is always there.’ + +Bodhidharma said, 'Where? Where is it? Show it to me so I can silence it, and you can go +back.’ + +The emperor said, 'But it is not something objective. I cannot show it to you, I cannot put +it in my hand. It is within me.’ + +So Bodhidhanna said, 'Okay, close your eyes and try to find out where it is. And the +moment you catch hold of it, open your eyes and tell me and I will still it.’ + + + +In that silence and with this madman, the emperor closed his eyes. He tried and tried. + +And he was afraid also, because Bodhidhanna was sitting with his staff — any moment he +would hit. He tried and tried and tried. He looked everywhere, in every nook and corner +of his being — where is that mind which is restless> And the more he looked, the more he +realized that the restlessness had disappeared. The more he tried to search... like a +shadow it was not there. + +Two hours passed, and he was not even aware of what had happened. His face became +silent, he became like a Buddha statue, and then with the rising sun Bodhidhanna said, +'Now open your eyes. It is enough. Two hours are more than enough. Now can you tell +me where it is?' + +The emperor opened his eyes. He was as silent as a human being can be. He bowed down +his head at Bodhidharma’s feet and said, 'You have already silenced it.’ + +Emperor Wu has written in his autobiography, 'This man is miraculous, magical. Not +doing anything he silenced my mind. And I also didn’t do anything. I just entered myself +and tried to find where it is. Of course he was right: first locate it, where it is. And just +the effort to locate it, and it was not found there.’ + +You will not find the ego. If you go in, if you search for it, you will not find it there. It +has never existed. It is just a false substitute. + +It has some utility, that’s why you have invented it. Because you don’t know your real +being, the real center, and without a center it is difficult to function, you have created a +fiction, a fictitious center, and you function through it. + +The real center is hidden. You have created a false center — the ego is a false center, a +substitute center. Without a center it is difficult to exist, difficult to function. You need a +center to function. And you don’t know your real center, so the mind has created a false +center. Mind is very skilled in creating substitutes. It always gives you a substitute if you +cannot find the real, because otherwise you will go mad. Without a center you will go +mad. You will get scattered, you will become fragmented; there will be no unity. So the +mind creates a false center. + +It is just like in dreaming. You dream you are feeling thirsty. Now if this thirst becomes +penetrating, the sleep will be disturbed, because then you will have to get up to drink +water. Now your mind will give a substitute: the mind will create a dream. You need not +get up, the sleep need not be disturbed — you dream that you are drinking water. From +the fridge you are taking water and drinking. The mind has given you a substitute. Now +you feel okay. The real thirst has not been quenched, simply deceived. But now you feel +that you have drunk, you have taken water. + +Now you can sleep; the sleep can continue undisturbed. + +In dreams the mind is constantly giving you substitutes just to protect sleep. And the +same is happening while you are awake. The mind is giving you substitutes just to protect +your sanity; otherwise you will be scattered in fragments. + +Unless the real center is known, the ego has to function. Once the real center is known, +there is no need to dream about water. When you have got the real water you can drink it. +There is no need to dream about it. Meditation brings you to the real center. And with +that very happening, the utility for the false disappears. + +But this must be kept in consciousness — that the ego is not your real center. Only then +can you start a search for the real. And spirituality is not a transfonnation of it. It cannot + + + +be transformed. It is unreal, it is simply not. You cannot do anything with it. If you are +aware, alert, if you watch it within yourself, it disappears. Just the flame of your +awareness and it is not there. Spirituality is a transcendence. + +Question 3 + +IF THE EGO IS UNREAL, THEN DOES IT NOT MEAN THAT THE UNCONSCIOUS +MIND, THE ACCUMULATION OF MEMORIES IN THE BRAIN CELLS, AND THE +PROCESS OF TRANSFORMATION THAT IS THE SUBJECT MATTER OF +SPIRITUALITY, IS ALSO UNREAL, A DREAM PROCESS? + +No. Ego is unreal; brain cells are not unreal. Ego is unreal; memories are not unreal. + +Ego is unreal; thought process is not unreal. Thought process is a reality. Memories are +real, brain cells are real, your body is real. Your body is real, your soul is real. These are +two realities. But when your soul gets identified with the body, the ego is formed — that +is unreality. + +It is just like this. I am standing before a mirror: I am real, the mirror is real, but the +reflection in the mirror is not real. I am real, the mirror is also real, but the reflection in +the mirror is a reflection, it is not a reality. Brain cells are real, consciousness is real, but +when consciousness gets involved, attached, identified with the brain cells, the ego is +formed. That ego is unreal. + +So when you have awakened, when you have become enlightened, your memory is not +going to disappear. The memory will be there. Really, it will be more crystal-clear. Then +it will function more accurately because there will be no disturbance from the false ego. +Your thought process will not disappear. Rather, for the first time you will be capable of +thinking. Before that you were simply borrowing things. Then you will really be able to +think. But then you, not the thought process, will be the master. + +Before, the thought process was the master. You couldn’t do anything about it. It +continued on its own; you were just a victim. You wanted to sleep and the mind +continued thinking. + +You wanted to stop it, but it would not stop. Really, the more you tried to stop it, the +more stubborn it became. It was your master. When you become enlightened it will be +there, but then it will be instrumental. Whenever you need it, you will be able to use it. +Whenever you don’t need it, it will not crowd your consciousness. Then it can be called +and then it can also be stopped. + +Mind cells will be there, the body will be there, memory will be there, thought process +will be there. Only one thing will not be there — the feeling of I will not be there. This is +difficult to understand. + +Buddha walks, Buddha eats, Buddha sleeps, Buddha remembers. He has memory, his +brain cells function beautifully. But Buddha has said, 'I walk, but no one walks in me. I +talk, but no one talks in me. I eat, but no one eats in me.’ The inner consciousness is no +more the ego. So when Buddha feels hungry, he cannot feel like you. You feel, 'I am +hungry.’ When Buddha feels hungry, he feels, 'The body is hungry. I am just the +knower.’ And that knower is without any feeling off + +The ego is the false entity, the only false entity — everything else is real. Two realities +can meet, and in their meeting, a third epi-phenomenon can be created. When two +realities meet, something false can happen. But the false can happen only if there is +consciousness. If there is no consciousness, the false cannot happen. + + + +Oxygen and hydrogen meet: a false water cannot happen. The false can happen only +when you are conscious, because only consciousness can err. Matter cannot err, matter +cannot be false. Matter is always true. Matter cannot deceive and cannot be deceive — +only consciousness can. With consciousness is the possibility to err. + +But remember another thing: matter is always real, never false, but also never true. The +matter cannot know what truth is. If you cannot err, you cannot know what truth is. Both +the possibilities open simultaneously. Human consciousness can err and can know that it +has erred and can move away from it. That is the beauty of it. The danger is there, but +danger is bound to be there. With every growth new dangers come in. For matter, there is +no danger. + +Look at it in this way. Whenever a new thing grows in existence, a new thing evolves, +now dangers come with it into existence. For a stone there is no danger. There are small +bacteria. In those bacteria sex doesn’t exist in the way it exists in man or in animals. They +simply divide their bodies. When one bacterium grows bigger and bigger, when it grows +to a certain extent, its body automatically divides into two. The parent body divides into +two. Now there are two bacteria. Those bacteria can live eternally — because there is no +birth, so there is no death. + +And the reverse process also happens. + +If food is not available, two bacteria will come nearer and nearer and they will become +one, their bodies will become one. No birth, no death. With sex entered birth; with birth +entered death; with birth entered individuality; with individuality entered ego. + +Every growth has its own potential dangers, but they are beautiful. If you can understand, +there is no need to fall into them, and you can transcend them. And when you transcend, +you mature and you achieve a greater synthesis. If you fall a victim, the greater synthesis +is not achieved. + +Spirituality is the peak, the last, the ultimate synthesis of all growth. The false is +transcended and the real absorbed. And only the real remains; all the false drops away. +But don’t think that the body is unreal — it is real. Brain cells are real, the thought process +is real. Only the relationship between the consciousness and the thought process is +unreal. That is a tie. You can untie it. And the moment you untie it, you have opened the +door. + +Question 4 + +HOW CAN ONE KNOW THAT THE SPIRITUAL SEARCH IN WHICH ONE IS +INVOLVED IS NOT AN EGO-TRIP, BUT IS AN AUTHENTIC RELIGIOUS +SEARCH? + +If you don't know, if you are confused, then know well that this is an ego-trip. If you are +not confused, if you know well that this is authentic, if there is no confusion at all, then it +is authentic. And it is not a question of deceiving someone else. + +It is a question of deceiving or not deceiving oneself. If you are confused, in doubt, it is +an ego-trip, because the moment the authentic search is there, there is no doubt. Faith +happens. + +Let me put it in some other way. Whenever you phrase such problems, the very confusion +exactly shows that you are on the wrong path. Someone comes to me and he says, 'Tell +me. I don’t know whether my meditation is going deep or not.’ + +So I say, 'If it is going deep, there is no need to come and ask me. The depth is such an + + + +experience, you will know it. And if you cannot know your depth, who is going to know +about it? You have come to ask me only because you are not feeling the depth. Now you +want someone else to certify you. If I say, "Yes, your meditation is going very deep," you +will feel very good — this is an ego-trip.' + +When you are ill, you know that you are ill. It may sometimes happen that illness may be +very very hidden. You may not be aware of it. But the reverse never happens: when you +are perfectly healthy, you know it. It is never hidden. When you are healthy, you know it. +It may be that for your illness you may not be so aware, but for health — if health is there +— you are aware of it, because the very phenomenon of health is a phenomenon of well- +being. If you cannot feel your health, who is going to feel it? For your ill-health there +may be experts to tell you what type of disease you have; there is no expert to tell you +about your health. + +There is no need. But if you ask whether you are healthy or nor, you are unhealthy; that +much is certain. This very confusion shows it. + +So when you are on a spiritual search, you can know whether it is an ego-trip or an +authentic search. And the very confusion shows that this is not an authentic search; this is +a sort of ego-trip. What is the ego-trip? You are less concerned with the real +phenomenon; you are more concerned with possessing it. + +People come to me and they say, lYou know, and you can know about us. Tell us +whether our kundalini has arisen or not.’ They are not concerned with kundalini, not +concerned really; they need a certificate. And sometimes I play and I say, 'Yes, your +kundalini has arisen,’ and immediately they are so happy. The person came very very +gloomy and sad, and when I say, 'Yes, your kundalini is awakened,’ he is happy like a +child. + +He goes away happy, and when he is just going out of my room, I call him back and I +say, 'I was just playing. It is not real. Nothing has happened to you.’ He is again sad. He +is not really concerned with any awakening; he is simply concerned with feeling good: +now his kundalini has awakened, now he can feel superior to others. + +And this is how many so-called gurus go on exploiting, because you are for your ego. +They can give you certificates, they can tell you, 'Yes, you are already awakened. + +You have become a Buddha.’ And you are not going to deny. If I say this to ten persons, +out of ten, nine are not going to deny it. They will just feel happy. They were in search of +such a guru who would say that they are awakened. + +False gurus exist because of your need, because no authentic guru is going to say this to +you, or give you any certificate — because any certificate is a demand from the ego. No +certificate is needed. If you are experiencing it, you are experiencing it. If the whole +world denies it, let them deny. It makes no difference. If the real experience is there, what +does it matter who says that you have achieved and who says you have not achieved? It is +irrelevant. But it is not irrelevant, because your basic search is the ego. You want to +believe that you have achieved all. + +And this happens many times: when you become a failure in the world, when you are in +misery in the world, when you cannot succeed there and when you feel that your +ambition remains unfulfilled and life is passing, you turn to spirituality. The same +ambition now asks to be fulfilled here. And it is easy to be fulfilled here — easy, because +in spirituality you can deceive yourself easily. In the real world, in the world of the +matter, you cannot deceive so easily. + + + +If you are poor, how can you pretend that you are rich? And if you pretend, no one is +deceived. And if you go on insisting that you are rich, then the whole society, the whole +crowd around you, will think you have gone mad. + + +I once knew a man who started thinking that he was Pundit Jawaharlal Nehru. His family, +his friends, everyone tried to persuade him, 'Don't talk such nonsense, otherwise you will +be thought to be mad.’ + +But he said, 'I am not talking nonsense. I am Pundit Jawaharlal Nehru.’ + +He started signing 'Jawaharlal Nehru’. He would send telegrams to circuit houses, to +officials, to collectors, to commissioners saying that, 'I am coming — Pundit Jawaharlal +Nehru.’ + +He had to be caught and chained in his house. I went to meet him. He lived in my village. +He said, 'You are a man of understanding. You can understand. These fools, no one +understands me — I am Pundit Jawaharlal Nehru.’ + +So I said, 'Yes, that’s why I have come to meet you. And don’t be afraid of these fools, +because great men like you have always suffered.’ + +He said, 'Right.' He was so happy. He said, 'You are the only man who can understand +me. Great men have to suffer.’ + +In the outer world, if you try to deceive yourself you will be thought mad, but in +spirituality it is very easy. You can say that your kundalini has arisen. Just because you +have a certain pain in your back, your kundalini has arisen. Because your brain is feeling +a little unbalanced, you think centers are opening. Because you have a headache +constantly, you think the third eye is opening. You can deceive and no one can say +anything, and no one is interested. + +But there are false teachers who will say, 'Yes, this is the method.’ And you will feel very +happy. + +An ego-trip means that you are not interested in really transforming yourself; you are +only interested in claiming. And the claim is easy, you can purchase it cheaply. And it is +a mutual thing. When a guru, a so-called guru, says that you are an awakened man, of +course he has made you awakened, so you have to pay respect to this guru. This is a +mutual thing. You pay respect to him. And now you cannot leave that guru, because the +moment you leave that guru what will happen to your awakening, your kundalini? You +cannot leave. That guru depends on you because you give respect and honor to him, and +then you will depend on him because no one else is going to believe that you are +awakened. You cannot leave. This is a mutual bluff. + +If you are really in search it is not so easy. And you don’t need any witness. It is difficult +and arduous; it may take even lives. And it is painful, it is a long suffering, because much +has to be destroyed, much has to be transcended, long-established chains have to be +broken. It is not easy. It is not a child's play. It is arduous, and suffering is bound to be +there because whenever you start changing your pattern, all that is old has to be dropped. +And all your investments are in the old. You will have to suffer. + +When you start looking inwards for your ego and you don’t find it, what will happen to +your image that you have lived with? You have always thought you were a very good +man, moral, this and that — what will happen to that? When you find that you are +nowhere to be found, where is that good man? Your ego implies all that you have thought +about yourself. + + + +Everything is implied in it. It is not something that you can throw easily. It is you, your +whole past. When you drop it you become like a zero, as if you never existed before. For +the first time you are born; no experience, no knowledge, no past — just like an innocent +child. Daring is needed, courage is needed. + +Authentic search is arduous. Ego-trip is very easy. And it can be fulfilled very easily, +because nothing is really fulfilled. You start believing; you start believing that something +has happened to you. You are simply wasting time and energy and life. So if you are +really with a master, he will constantly pull you back from your trip. He will have to +watch that you don't become mad, that you don’t start thinking in dreams. He will have to +pull you back. + +And it is a very very difficult thing, because whenever you are pulled back you take +revenge on the master. 'I was going so high, and was just on the verge of exploding, and +he says, "Nothing is happening. You are just imagining.'" You are pulled back to the +earth. + +With a real master it is difficult to be a disciple. And disciples almost always go against +their masters, because they are on their ego-trips and the master is trying to bring them +out of that. And these disciples create false masters. They have a need, such a great need, +that anyone who fulfills their need will become their master. + +And it is easy to help your ego grow, because you are for it. It is very difficult to help +your ego to disappear. + +Remember well, and check every day and every moment that your search is not an ego- +trip. Go on checking it. It is subtle, and the ways of the ego are very very very cunning. +They are not on the surface. The ego manipulates you from within; deep down from the +unconscious. But if you are alert, the ego cannot deceive you. If you are alert, you will +come to know its language, you will come to know its feeling, because it is always going +after experience. This is the key word. + +The ego is always looking for the experience — sexual or spiritual, it makes no +difference. The ego is greedy to experience this and to experience that: to experience +kundalini and to experience the seventh body. The ego is always after experiences. The +real search is not a greed for any experience, because any experience is going to frustrate +you, is bound to frustrate you — because any experience is going to be repetitive. Then +you will get fed up with it; then you will again demand some new experience. + +The search for the new will remain with the ego. You will meditate, and if you are only +meditating just to get a new thrill, because your life has become boring — you are fed up +with your ordinary routine life, so you want to get some thrill.... You may get it, because +man gets whatsoever he tries to find. + +That is the misery — whatsoever you desire, you will find. And then you will repent. You +will get the thrill. Then what? Then you get fed up with it also. Then you want to take +LSD or something else. Then you go on moving from this master to that, from this +ashram to that, just in search of a new thrill. + +The ego is a greed for new experiences. And every new experience will become old, +because whatsoever is new will become old — then again.... Spirituality is not a search for +experience really. Spirituality is a search for one's being. Not for any experience — not +even for bliss, not even for ecstasy — because experience is an outer thing; howsoever +inner, it is outer. + +Spirituality is the search for the real being that is inside you: I must know what my reality + + + +is. And with that knowing, all greed for experiencing ceases. And with that knowing, +there is no urge — no urge to move for any new experience. With the knowing of the +inner true reality, the authentic being, all search ceases. + +So don’t move for an experience. All experiences are just tricks of the mind, all +experiences are just escapes. Meditation is not an experience, it is a realization. +Meditation is not an experience; rather, it is a stopping of all experience. Because of this, +those who have really tried to express the inner happening — for example, Buddha — they +say, 'Don't ask what happens there.’ + +Of, if you insist, they will say, 'Nothing happens there.’ + +If I say to you that nothing will happen in meditation, what will you do? You will stop +meditating. If nothing is going to happen there, what is the use? — that shows you are on +an ego-trip. If I say nothing happens there, and you will say, 'Okay, I have known many +happenings and I have known many experiences, and every experience proved to be +frustrating....’ You pass through it and then you know it was nothing. And then an urge to +repeat, and then repetition also becomes a boredom. Then you move to something else.... +This is how you have been moving for lives and lives; for thousands and thousands of +lives you have been moving for experience. You say, 'I have known experience. Now I +don’t want any new experience. I want to know the experience.’ The whole emphasis +changes. + +Experience is something outside you. The experiencer is your being. And this is the +distinction between true spirituality and false: if you are for experiences, the spirituality +is false; if you are for the experiencer, then it is true. But then you are not concerned +about kundalini, not concerned about chakras, not concerned about all these things. They +will happen, but you are not concerned, you are not interested, and you will not move on +these by-paths. You will go on moving towards the inner center where nothing remains +except you in your total aloneness. + +Only the consciousness remains, without content. + +Content is the experience. Whatsoever you experience is the content. I experience misery +— then the misery is the content of my consciousness. Then I experience pleasure — then +pleasure is the content. Then I experience boredom — then boredom is the content. And +then you can experience silence — then silence is the content. And then you can +experience bliss — then bliss is the content. So you go on changing the content. You can +go on changing ad infinitum, but this is not the real thing. + +The real is the one to whom these experiences happen — to whom boredom happens, to +whom bliss happens. The spiritual search is not WHAT happens, but to WHOM it +happens. Then there is no possibility for the ego to arise. + + +THE END. + + + +Chapter 57: Searching for freedom + + +TOSS ATTACHMENT FOR BODY ASIDE, + +REALIZING I AM EVERYWHERE. + +ONE WHO IS EVERYWHERE IS JOYOUS. + +THINKING NO THING +WILL LIMITED-SELF UNLIMIT. + +I have heard a story about an old doctor. One day his assistant phoned him because he +was in very great difficulty — his patient was choking himself to death. A billiard ball +was stuck in his throat, and the assistant was at a loss for what to do. So he asked the old +doctor, 'What am I supposed to do now?’ The old doctor said, 'Tickle the patient with a +feather.’ + +After a few minutes the assistant phoned again, very happy and jubilant, and said, 'Your +treatment proved wonderful — the patient started laughing and he spat the ball out. But +tell me from where you learned this remarkable technique.’ + +The old doctor said, 'I just made it up. This has always been my motto: When you don’t +know what to do, do something.’ + +But this will not do as far as meditation is concerned. If you don’t know what to do, don’t +do anything, because mind is very intricate, complex, delicate. If you don’t know what to +do, it is better not to do anything, because whatsoever you do without knowing, is going +to create more complexities than it can solve. It may even prove fatal, it may even prove +suicidal. + +If you don’t know anything about the mind.... And really, you don’t know anything about +it. + +Mind is just a word. You don’t know the complexity of it. Mind is the most complex +thing in existence; there is nothing comparable to it. And it is the most delicate — you can +destroy it, you can do something which cannot then be undone. These techniques are +based on a very deep knowledge, on a very deep encounter with the human mind. Each +technique is based on long experimentation. + +So remember this, don’t do anything on your own, and don’t mix two techniques, because +their functioning is different, their ways are different, their bases are different. They lead +to the same end, but as means they are totally different. Sometimes they may even be +diametrically opposite. So don’t mix two techniques. Really, don’t mix anything — use the +technique as it is given. + +Don’t change it, don’t improve it, because you cannot improve it, and any change you +bring to it will be fatal. And before you start doing a technique, be fully alert that you +have understood it. If you feel confused and you don’t know really what the technique is, +it is better not to do it, because each technique is to bring about a revolution in you. + +These techniques are not evolutionary. By evolution I mean that if you don’t do anything +and just go on living, in millions of years the meditation will happen automatically to +you, in millions of lives you will evolve. In the natural course of time, you will come to +the point to which a Buddha comes through a revolution. + +These techniques are revolutionary. Really, they are shortcuts; they are not natural. + + + +Nature will lead you to Buddhahood, to enlightenment — you will come to it one day — +but then it is up to nature; you cannot do anything about it except just go on living in +misery. It will take a very long time; really, millions of years and lives. + +Religion is revolutionary. It gives you a technique which can shorten the lengthy process, +and with which you can take a jump — a jump which will avoid millions of lives. In a +single moment you can travel millions of years. So it is dangerous, and unless you +understand it rightly, don't do it. Don’t mix anything on your own. Don’t change. + +First try to understand the technique absolutely rightly. When you have understood it, +then try it. And don’t use this old doctor's motto that when you don't know what to do, do +something. No, don't do anything. Non-doing will be more beneficial to you than any +doing. This is so because the mind is so delicate that if you do something wrongly it is +very difficult to undo it — very difficult to undo it. It is very easy to do something wrong, +but very difficult to undo it. Remember this. + +The first technique: + +TOSS ATTACHMENT FOR BODY ASIDE, + +REALIZING I AM EVERYWHERE. + +ONE WHO IS EVERYWHERE IS JOYOUS. + +TOSS ATTACHMENT FOR BODY ASIDE, REALIZING I AM EVERYWHERE. + +ONE WHO IS EVERYWHERE IS JOYOUS. Many points have to be understood. First: +TOSS ATTACHMENT FOR BODY ASIDE. There is a deep attachment to the body - +bound to be, it is natural. You have been living in the body for many, many lives, from +the very beginning. Bodies have changed, but you were always with a body, you were +always embodied. + +There have been certain moments and times when you were not embodied, but then you +were not conscious. When you die from one body, you die in unconsciousness and then +you remain unconscious. Then you are born again in a new body, but then too you are +unconscious. The gap between one death and another birth is unconscious, so you don’t +know how you will feel when not embodied. You don't know who you are when you are +not in a body. You know only one phenomenon, and that is of embodiment; you have +always known yourself in the body. + +This has been so long, so continuous, that you have forgotten that you are different from +it. This is a forgetfulness — natural, bound to happen in the circumstances — hence the +attachment. You feel you are the body — this is the attachment. You feel that you are not +anything other than the body, not anything more than the body. You may not agree with +me at this point, because many times you think that you are not the body, you are the +soul, the self. But this is not your knowing; this is simply what you have heard, what you +have read, and what you have believed without knowing. + + +So the first thing to be done is that you have to realize the fact that really this is your +knowing — that you are the body. Don’t deceive yourself, because deception will not +help. If you think that you already know that you are not the body, then you cannot toss +aside the attachment, because really for you there is no attachment, you already know. +Then many difficulties arise which cannot be solved. A difficulty has to be solved at the + + + +beginning. Once you lose the beginning, you can never solve it; you have to come back +again to the beginning. So remember well, and realize well that you don’t know yourself +as anything other than the body. This is the first basic realization. + +This realization is not there. Your mind is befogged by whatsoever you have heard; your +mind is conditioned by the knowledge of others — it is borrowed, it is not real. Not that it +is false — those who have said it, they have known it — but for you it is false unless it +becomes your own experience. So whenever I say something is false, I mean it is not +your experience. It may be true for someone else, but it is not true for you. And truth is +individual in this sense — that truth is truth only when experienced; not experienced, it is +untrue. There are no universal truths. Every truth has to be individual before it becomes +true. + +You know, you have heard; this is part of your knowledge, part of an inheritance — that +you are not the body — but it is not real for you. + +First toss aside this unreal knowledge. Face the fact that you know yourself only as the +body. That will create a great tension in you — it was just to hide that tension that you +gathered this knowledge. You go on believing that you are not the body and you go on +living as the body, so you are divided, and your whole being becomes non- authentic, +pseudo. + +Really this is a paranoid condition. You live as the body and you think and talk as the +soul — then there is a struggle and a conflict and then you are constantly in an inner +turmoil, a deep unease which cannot be bridged. So first encounter the fact you don't +know anything about the soul, the self — all that you know is about the body. + +This will release a very uneasy condition in you. All that is hidden will come up to the +surface. In realizing this fact that you are the body, you will literally start perspiring. In +realizing this fact that you are the body, you will feel very uneasy, strange, but that +feeling has to be gone through; only then can you know what attachment to the body +means. + +Teachers go on saying that you should not be attached to your body, but the basic thing — +what the attachment to the body is — is unknown to you. Attachment to the body is a deep +identification with the body, but first you have to realize what this identification is. So +put aside all your knowledge that has given you an illusory sense that you are the soul. + +Realize that you know only one thing, and that is the body. How does this create and how +does this release hidden turmoil and a hidden hell within you? + +The moment you realize you are the body, for the first time you realize the attachment. +For the first time you grip the fact in your consciousness that this body which is bom, and +this body which is gong to die, is you. For the first time you realize the fact that these +bones, this bones — this is you. For the first time you realize the fact that this sex, this +anger — this is you. So all the false images fall. You become real. + +The reality is painful, very painful — that’s why we go on hiding it. It is a deep trick. You +go on thinking about yourself as the self, and everything that you don’t like, you throw on +the body. So you say sex belongs to the body, love belongs to you. Then you say greed +and anger, they belong to the body; compassion belongs to you. Compassion belongs to +the self, and cruelty belongs to the body. Forgiveness belongs to the self, and anger +belongs to the body. So whatsoever you feel is wrong, ugly, you throw to the body, and +whatsoever you feel is beautiful, you go on being identified with. You create a division. +This division will not allow you to know what attachment is, and unless you know what + + + +attachment is and unless you suffer the misery of it and the hell of it, you cannot put it +aside. + +How can you put it aside? You can put something aside only when it proves a disease, +when it proves a heavy burden, when it proves a hell; only then can you put it aside. + +Your attachment has not proved a hell yet. Whatsoever Buddha says and Mahavir says is +irrelevant. They may go on saying that attachment is hell, but this is not your feeling. +That's why you again and again ask how to be detached, how to be not attached, how to +go beyond attachment. You go on asking this 'how' only because you don’t kn ow what +attachment is. If you know what attachment is, you will simply jump out of it. You will +not ask 'how'. + +If your house is on fire you will not ask anyone, you will not go seeking a master to ask +how to come out of it. If the house is on fire you will simply get out of it. Y ou will not +lose a single moment. You will not search for the teacher, you will not consult the +scriptures. And you will not try to choose in what ways one has to come out, what means +have to be adopted, and which door is the right door. These things are irrelevant when the +house is on fire. When you know what attachment is, the house is on fire. You can put it +aside. + +To enter in this technique, first you have to throw the false knowledge of the self so that +attachment with the body is revealed in its totality. It is going to be very difficult; it is +going to be a deep anxiety and anguish to face it. + +It is not going to be easy, it is arduous, but once you face it, you can put it aside. And +there is no need to ask how. It is absolutely a fire, a hell. You can jump out of it. + +This sutra says: + +TOSS ATTACHMENT FOR BODY ASIDE, + +REALIZING I AM EVERYWHERE. + +And the moment you toss aside the attachment, you will realize you are everywhere. +Because of this attachment you feel you are limited by the body. It is not the body which +is limiting you; it is your attachment to it. It is not the body which is making a barrier +between you and the reality; it is your attachment to it. Once you know what the +attachment is not there, there is no body to you. Rather, the whole existence becomes +your body; your body becomes a part of the total existence. Then it is not separate. + +Really, your body is nothing but existence comes to you, existence reached to you. It is +the nearest existence to you, that's all — and then it goes on spreading. Your body is just +the nearest corner of it, and then the whole existence is there — it goes on spreading. + +Once your attachment is not there, there is no body to you; or, the whole existence has +become your body. You are everywhere. + +In the body you are somewhere; without the body you are everywhere. In the body you +are confined to a particular space; without the body you have no confinement. + +That's why those who have known, they say the body is the imprisonment. Not that the +body is the imprisonment; really, the attachment to it is the imprisonment. Once your +eyes are not focused on the body, you are everywhere. + +This looks absurd. To the mind who is in the body, this looks absurd, a madness — how +can one be everywhere? To a Buddha, whatsoever we say — that 'I am here’ — really + + + +looks like madness. How can you be somewhere? Consciousness is not a space concept. +That's why if you close your eyes and try to find out where in your body you are, you will +be at a loss. You cannot find out where you are. + +There have been many religions and many sects which have preached that you are in the +navel. Some say that you are in the heart, some say that you are in the head, some say +that you are in this center and that center, but Shiva says you are nowhere. That's why if +you close your eyes and try to find out where you are, you cannot say. You are, but there +is no 'where' to you. Simply you are. + +In deep sleep you are not aware of the body. YOu are. In the morning you will say that +the sleep was very deep, very blissful. You were aware of a deep bliss running +throughout, but you were not aware of the body. In deep sleep where are you? When you +die, where do you go? Continuously people ask, 'When someone dies, where does he +go?’ But the question is absurd, foolish. + +It is related to our embodied consciousness — because we think that we are somewhere, +so then when we die, where do we go? — nowhere. + +When you die, you are not somewhere, that’s all. You are not confined to a space, that’s +all. But if you have a desire to be confined, you will be confined again. Your desire leads +you to new confinements. But when you are not in the body, you are nowhere, or, +everywhere — this depends on which word appeals to you. + +If you ask Buddha, he will say you are nowhere. That’s why he chooses the word +'nirvana'. Nirvana means you are nowhere. Just like a flame which has gone out — how +can you say where the flame is then? He will say it is nowhere. The flame has simply +ceased to be. Buddha uses a negative term — nowhere. That's what nirvana means. When +you are not attached to the body you are in nirvana, you are nowhere. + +Shiva chooses a positive term — he says everywhere — but both the tenns mean the same. +If you are everywhere, you cannot be somewhere. If you are everywhere, it is saying +almost the same thing as saying that you are nowhere. + +But in the body we are attached, and we feel that we are confined. This confinement is a +mental act; it is your own doing. And you can confine yourself to anything. You have a +valuable diamond. Your being can be confined to it, and if the diamond is stolen you may +commit suicide or you may go mad. + +What has happened? There are so many persons without a diamond: no one is +committing suicide, no one is feeling any difficulty without a diamond, but what has +happened to you? + +Once you were also without a diamond; there was no problem. Now you are again +without a diamond, but there is a problem. How is this problem created? It is your own +doing. Now you are attached, confined. The diamond has become your body. Now you +cannot live without it; it is impossible to live without it. + +Wherever you get attached, it becomes a new imprisonment. And whatsoever we are +doing in life is this: we go on creating more and more imprisonments, bigger and bigger +jails to live in. Then we go on decorating those jails so that they look like home, and then +we forget completely that they are jails. + +This sutra says that if you toss aside the attachment with the body, realization happens +that I AM EVERYWHERE. You have an oceanic feeling, your consciousness exists +without any location. Your consciousness exists without being tethered anywhere. You +become just like a sky, enveloping all; everything is in you. Your consciousness has + + + +expanded to the infinite possibility. And then the sutra says: + +ONE WHO IS EVERYWHERE IS JOYOUS. + +Confined to a place you will be in misery, because you are always bigger than where you +are confined. This is the misery — as if you are forcing yourself into a small bowl; the +ocean is being forced into a small pot. + +The misery is bound to be there. This is the misery, and whenever this misery has been +felt, the search for enlightenment arises, the search for the Brahma. Brahma means the +infinite one. The search for moksha means the search for freedom. In a limited body you +cannot be free; somewhere you will be a slave. Nowhere or everywhere you can be free. +Look at the human mind: whatsoever the direction, it is always for freedom, searching for +freedom. It may be political, it may be economic, it may be psychological, it may be +religious — whatsoever the direction, but the human mind is always groping for freedom. +Freedom seems to be the deepest need. Wherever human mind finds any barrier, any +slavery, any limitation, it fights against t. The whole human history is a fight for freedom. +Dimensions may be different. A Marx, a Lenin, they are fighting for economic freedom. + +A Gandhi, a Lincoln, they are fighting for political freedom. And there are thousands and +thousands of slaveries, and the fight goes on. But one thing is certain — that somewhere, +deep down, man is searching continuously for more and more freedom. + +Shiva says, and all the religions say, that you can become politically free, but the struggle +will not cease. Only one type of slavery will be no more, but there are other types of +slaveries there, and when you are politically free then you will become aware of other +slaveries. + +Economic slavery can cease, but then you will become aware of other slaveries — sexual, +psychological. This struggle cannot cease unless you begin to feel and know that you are +everywhere. The moment you feel you are everywhere, freedom is attained. + +This freedom is not political, this freedom is not economical, not sociological. This +freedom is existential. This freedom is total. That's why we have called it moksha, total +freedom. And then only can you be joyous. Joy or bliss is possible only when you are +totally free. + +Really, to be totally free means joy. The joy is not a consequence, it is the very +happening. When you are totally free you are joyous, you are blissful. This bliss is not +happening as an effect. Freedom is bliss, slavery is misery. The moment you feel limited +you are miserable; wherever you feel limited you feel miserable. When you feel +unlimited, misery disappears. So misery exists in barriers, and bliss exists in a no-barrier +land, in a no-barrier existence. + +Whenever you feel this freedom, joy happens to you. Even now, whenever you feel a +certain freedom, even if it is not total, joy comes to you. You fall in love with somebody: +a certain joy, a certain bliss happens to you. Why does it happen? Really, whenever you +are in love with somebody, you have tossed aside your own attachment to the body. In a +deep sense, now the other's body has also become your body. + +You are not confined to your own body now; somebody else's body has also become your +body, it has also become your home, it has also become your abode. You feel a freedom +Now you can move into the other and the other can move into you. In a limited way a + + + +barrier has fallen You are more than before. + +When you love someone you are more than you ever were; your being has increased, +expanded. Y our consciousness is not limited like it was before; it has reached a new +realm. You feel a certain freedom in love. It is not total, and sooner or later you will feel +again confined. You feel extended, but still finite. So those who really love, are sooner or +later bound to fall into prayer. + +Prayer means a greater love. Prayer means a love with the whole existence. You now +know the secret. You know a key, a secret key — that you loved a person, and the +moment you loved, the doors opened and the barriers dissolved, and at least for one +person more your being was expanded, increased. Now you know the secret key. If you +can fall in love with the whole existence, you will not be the body. + +In deep love you become bodiless. When you are in love with someone you don’t feel +yourself as a body. When you are not loved, when you are not in love, you feel yourself +more as a body, you become more aware of the body. The body becomes a burden; you +have to carry it. When you are loved, the body has lost weight. + +When you are loved and you are in love, you don’t feel gravitation has any effect on you. +You can dance, you can fly really. In a deeper way the body is no more — but this is in a +limited way. The same can happen when you are in love with the total existence. + +In love, joy comes to you. It is not pleasure. Remember, joy is not pleasure. Pleasure +comes to you through the senses; joy come to you through being non-sensuous. Pleasures +comes to you through the body; joy comes to you when you are not the body. When for a +moment the body has disappeared and you are simply consciousness, then joy comes to +you. When you are the body, pleasure can happen to you. It is always through the body. +Pain is possible, pleasure is possible through the body. Joy is possible only when you are +not the body. + +It happens ordinarily also, accidentally also. You are listening to music and suddenly +gravitation is lost. You are so absorbed in it, you have forgotten your body. You are filled +with music and you have become one with music. There is not a listener to it: the listener +and the listened have become one. Only music exists; you are no more. You have +expanded. Now you are flowing with musical notes, now there is no limit to you. The +notes are dissolving into silence, and you are also dissolving into silence with them. The +body is forgotten. + +Whenever the body is forgotten, it is tossed aside unknowingly, unconsciously, and joy +happens to you. + +Through Tantra and Yoga you can do it methodologically. Then it is not an accident; then +you are the master of it. Then it is not happening to you; then you have the key in your +hands and you can open the door whenever you want. Or, you can open the door forever +and throw away the key; no need to close the door again. + +Joy happens in ordinary life also, but you don't know how it happens. The happening is +always when you are not the body — remember this. So whenever you again feel any +moment of joy, become aware of whether you are the body in that moment or not. You +will not be. Whenever joy is, the body is not. Not that the body disappears — the body +remains, but you are not attached to it. You are not attached to it, you are not tethered to +it. You have jumped out. + +You may have jumped out because of music, you may have jumped out because of a +beautiful sunrise, you may have jumped out because a child was laughing, you may have + + + +jumped out because you were in love. Whatsoever the cause, but you have jumped out for +a moment — out of the body. The body is there, but tossed aside; you are not attached to +it. Y ou have taken a flight. + +Through this technique, you know that one who is everywhere cannot be miserable; he is +joyous, he is joy. So the more you become confined, the more miserable. Expand, push +your boundaries away, and whenever you can, leave the body aside. + +You look in the sky and clouds are floating: move with the clouds, leave the body here on +the earth. And the moon is there: move with the moon. Whenever you can forget the +body, don’t miss the opportunity — go on a journey. And then you will become +accustomed to what it means to be out of the body. + +And this is only a question of attention. Attachment is a question of attention. If you pay +attention to the body, you are attached. If the attention has moved away, you are not +attached. + +Look, for example: you are playing on the sports-grounds; you are playing hockey or +volley-ball or something else. When you are deep in play, your attention is not on the +body. Someone has hit your feet and the blood is flowing — you are not aware. The pain +is there, but you are not there. The blood is flowing but you are out of the body. Your +consciousness, your attention, may be flying with the ball, may be running with the ball. +Your attention is somewhere else. The game finishes: suddenly you come back to the +body, and the blood is there and the pain. And you wonder how it happened — when it +happened and how it happened and how you were not aware of it. + +To be in the body, your attention is needed to be there. So remember it — wherever your +attention is, you are there. If your attention is in the clouds, you are there. If your +attention is in the flower, you are there. + +If your attention is in money, you are there. Your attention is your being. And if your +attention is nowhere, you are everywhere. + +So the whole process of meditation is to be in such a state of consciousness where your +attention is nowhere, there is no object to it. When there is no object to it, there is no +body to you. Your attention creates the body. Your attention is your body. And when +attention is nowhere, you are everywhere — joy happens to you. It is not good to say that +it happens to you — you are it. It cannot leave you now; it is your very being. Freedom is +joy, that's why so much hankering after freedom. + +The second technique: + +THINKING NO THING +WILL LIMITED-SELF UNLIMIT. + +That's what I was saying. If there is no object to your attention, you are nowhere; or, you +are everywhere, you are free. You have become freedom. This second sutra says: +THINKING NO THING - OR, THINKING NOTHING - WILL LIMITED-SELF +UNLIMIT. + +If you are not thinking, you are unlimited. Thinking gives you a limit, and there are many +types of limits. You are a Hindu — it gives a limit. Hindu, to be a Hindu, is to be attached +to a thought, to a system, to a pattern. You are a Christian — then again you are limited. A +religious man cannot be a Hindu or a Christian. And if someone is a Hindu or a Christian, + + + +he is not religious — impossible — because these are thoughts. + +A religious man means not thinking thoughts; not limited by any thought, by any system, +by any pattern; not limited by the mind, living in the unlimited. + +When you have a certain thought, that thought becomes your barrier. It may be a +beautiful thought — still it is a barrier. A beautiful prison is still a prison. It may be a +golden thought but it makes no difference, it imprisons you all the same. And whenever +you have a thought and you are attached to it, you are always against someone, because +barriers cannot exist if you are not against someone. A thought is always a prejudice; it is +always for and against. + +I have heard about a very religious Christian man who was a poor farmer. He belonged to +the Society of Friends, he was a Quaker. Quakers are non-violent; they believe in love, in +friendship. He was coming from the city to his village on his mulecart, and suddenly, +apparently without any cause, the mule stopped and he would not budge. He tried, he +persuaded the mule in Christian ways, he persuaded the mule in a very friendly way, a +non-violent way. He was a Quaker: he couldn’t beat the mule, he couldn’t use strong +words, he couldn't abuse, scold, but he was fdled with anger. But how to beat the mule? +He wanted to beat him, so he said to the mule, 'Behave rightly, because I am a Quaker — + +I cannot beat you, I cannot scold you, I cannot be violent — but remember, mule, that I +can sell you to someone who is not a Christian!’ + +The Christian has his own world, and the non-Christian is opposite. + +The Christian cannot conceive that the non-Christian can reach the kingdom of God. A +Hindu cannot conceive, a Jain cannot conceive, that others can enter into that realm of +bliss — impossible. Thought creates a limitation, a barrier, a boundary, and all those who +are not for are taken to be against. One who is not in agreement with me is against me. +How can you be everywhere? You can be with the Christian; you cannot be with the non- +Christian. You can be with the Hindu, but you cannot be with the non-Hindu, with the +Mohammedan. Thought is bound to be somewhere against — against someone or +something. It cannot be total. Remember: thought cannot be total; only no-thought can be +total. + +Secondly: thought is always from the mind, it is always a by-product of the mind. It is +your attitude, your speculation, your prejudice; it is your reaction, your formulation, your +concept, your philosophy, but it is not existence itself. It is something about the +existence; it is not existence itself. + +A flower is there. You can say something about it; that is a thought. You can say it is +beautiful, you can say it is ugly, you can say it is sacred, but whatsoever you say about +the flower is not the flower. The flower exists without your thoughts, and whenever you +are thinking about the flower, you are creating a barrier between you and the flower. + +The flower doesn’t need your thoughts. + +It exists. Drop your thoughts, and then you can drop yourself into the flower. Whatsoever +you say about a rose is meaningless, howsoever meaningful it appears, it is meaningless. +What you say is not needed. It is not giving any existence to the flower. It is creating a +film between you and the flower; it is creating a limitation. So whenever there is thought, +you are debarred; the door is closed to existence. + +This sutra says: + + + +THINKING NO THING +WILL LIMITED-SELF UNLIMIT. + + +If you don’t think, if you simply are, fully alert, aware, but without any clouds of thought, +you are unlimited. The body is not the only body — a deeper body is the mind. Body +consists of matter; mind also consists of matter — subtle, more refined. Body is the outer +layer, mind is the inner layer. And it is easy to be detached from the body. It is more +difficult to be detached from the mind, because with the mind you feel you are more +yourself. + +If someone says that your body looks ill, you don’t feel offended. You are not so +attached; it is a little away from you. But if someone says your mind seems to be +pathological, ill, you feel offended. He has insulted you. With the mind you are nearer. If +someone says something about your body you can tolerate it. If someone says something +about your mind, it is impossible to tolerate it, because he has hit deeper. + + +The mind is the inner layer of the body. Mind and body are not two: the outer layer of +your body is the body and the inner layer is the mind. Just as if you have a house: you +can see the house from the outside, and you can see the house from the inside. From the +outside the outer layer of the walls will be seen; from the inside the inner layer. The mind +is your inner layer. It is nearer to you, but it is still a body. + +In death your outer body drops, but you carry the inner, subtle layer with you. You are so +attached to it that even death cannot separate you from your mind. Mind continues. That's +why your past births can be known, because you are still carrying all the minds that you +ever had. They are there. If you were a dog once, the dog mind is still with you. If you +were a tree once, the tree mind is still with you. If you once were a woman or a man, you +carry those minds. All the minds are carried by you. You are so attached to them that you +never lose the grip. + +In death the outer dissolves, but the inner is carried. It is a very subtle material thing. +Really, just vibrations of energy, thought vibrations. You carry them, and according to +your thought pattern that you carry, you enter a new body. According to the thought +pattern, the desire pattern, the mind, you again create a new body for yourself. The blue- +print is in the mind, and the outer layer is again accumulated. + + +The first sutra is to put aside the body. The second sutra is to put aside the mind, the +inner body. Even death cannot separate you — only meditation can separate. That's why +meditation is a greater death, it is a deeper surgery — deeper than death itself. That’s why +so much fear. People go on talking about meditation but they will never do it. They will +talk, they can write about it, they can preach about it, but they will never do it. A deep +fear exists about meditation, and the fear is of death. + +Those who do meditation, they come one day or another to the point where they are +scared, thrown back. They come to me and they say, 'Now we cannot enter more. It is +impossible.’ A point comes where one feels that one is dying. And that point is of a +deeper death than any death, because now the innermost is being separated; the most +inner identity is being shattered. One feels one is dying; one feels now one is moving into +non-existence. A deep abyss opens, infinite emptiness opens. One is scared, runs back to +cling to the body so that one is not thrown, because the earth beneath is moving, is being + + + +removed. A valley is opening, a nothingness. + +So people, even if they try, they always try superficially; they play with meditation. They +are unconsciously aware that if they move deep they will be no more. And that's right, the +fear is true — you will not be yourself again. + +Once you have known that abyss, that shoonya, the void, you will not be the same again. +You come back, but you are resurrected, a new man. The old has disappeared. You +cannot find even a trace of it, of where it has gone. The old was the identity with the +mind. Now you cannot be identified with the mind. Now you can use the mind, you can +use the body, but they have become instruments; you are above them. Whatsoever you +do, you can do, but you are not one with them. This gives freedom. But this can happen +only when THINKING NO THING. + +Hmm — this is very paradoxical — THINKING NO THING. You can think about things. +How can you think about no thing? What does this 'no thing’ mean? And how can you +think about it? Whenever you think about something it becomes a thing, it becomes an +object, it becomes a thought, and thoughts are things. How can you think no thing? You +cannot, but in the very effort — the effort to think no thing — thinking will be lost, +thinking will be dissolved. + +You may have heard about Zen koans. Zen masters give an absurd puzzle to the seeker to +think about — and it is something which cannot be thought. It is given knowingly just to +stop thinking. For example, they say to the seeker: 'Go and find out what your original +face is: the face you had when you were not bom. Don’t think about this face which you +have got; think of the face you had before birth.’ + + +How can you think about it? There was no face before birth; the face comes with the +birth. The face is part of the body. You have no face; only the body has a face. Close +your eyes and you have no face. You know about your face through the mirror. You have +not seen it yourself, and you cannot see it, so how can one think about the original face?> +But one can try; the very effort will help. + +The seeker will try and try — and it is impossible. He will come to the master again and +again, asking, 'Is this the original face?’ And before he says it to the master, the master +says, 'It is wrong. Whatsoever you bring is going to be wrong.’ + +For months together the seeker comes again and again. He finds something, imagines +something, and he sees the face — 'The original face is like this?’ And the master says, +'No.’ And every time this 'No, no’, and by and by he becomes more and more puzzled. + +He cannot think. He tries and tries and tries and fails — that failure is the basic thing. One +day he comes to a total failure. All thinking stops in that total failure and he comes to +realize that the original face cannot be thought. Thinking stops. + +And whenever this last time happens to a seeker, when he comes to the master, the +master says, 'Now there is no need. I see the original face.’ The eyes have become vacant. +The seeker has come not to say something, but just to be near the master. + +He has not found any answer. There was none. He has come for the first time without the +answer. There is no answer to it. He comes silently. + +Every time he had come he had some answer. The mind was there, the thought was there +— he was limited by that thought. He had found or imagined some face — he was limited +by that face. Now he has become original; now there is no limit. Now he has got no face, + + + +no idea, no thought. He has come without any mind. This is the state of no-mind. + +In this state of no-mind, the limited-self unlimits. The limits are dissolved. Suddenly you +are everywhere, suddenly you are everyone. Suddenly you are in the tree and in the stone +and in the sky and in the friend and in the enemy — suddenly you are everywhere. The +whole existence has become just a mirror — you are everywhere, mirrored. This state is +the state of bliss. Now nothing can disturb you, because nothing exists except you. Now +nothing can destroy you; nothing exists except you. Now there is no death, because even +in death you are. Now nothing is opposed to you. Alone, you exist. + +This aloneness Mahavir has called KAIVALYA, total aloneness. Why alone? — because +everything is involved, absorbed, has become you. You can express this state in two +ways. You can say, 'Only I am. Aham Brahmasmi — I am the God, the divine, the total. +Everything has come unto me; all the rivers have dissolved into my ocean. + +Alone I exist. Nothing else exists.’ Sufi mystics say this, and Mohammedans could never +understand why Sufis say such things. A Sufi says, 'There is no God. Alone I exist.’ Or, + +'I am the God.’ This is a positive way of saying that now no separation is there. Buddha +uses a negative way. He says, 'I am nor more. Nothing exists.’ + +Both are true, because when everything is included in me, there is no sense in calling +myself. The I is always opposed to the YOU; I is always opposed to THOU. In relation to +YOU it is meaningful. When there is no YOU, I becomes meaningless. So Buddha says +there is no I, nothing exists. Either everything has become you, or you have become a +non-being and you dissolve into everything. + +Both the expressions are true. Of course, no expression can be totally true, that’s why the +opposite expression is always also true. Every expression is partial, part; that’s why the +opposite expression is also true — that too is part of it. Remember this. Whatsoever you +express may be true and the opposite also may be true — the very opposite. Really, it is +bound to be true, because every expression is only a part. + +And there are two types of expression: you can choose the positive or you can choose the +negative. If you choose the positive, the negative seems to be untrue. It is not; it is +complementary. It is not really opposed to it. So whether you say Brahma — the total — or +you say Nirvana — the nothingness — it is the same. + +Both connote the same experience, and the experience is this — thinking no thing, you +come to know it. + +Some basic things have to be understood about this technique. One: thinking, you are +separated from existence. Thinking is not a relation, it is not a bridge, it is not a +communication — it is a barrier. Non-thinking you are related, bridged; you are in +communion. When you are talking to someone, you are not related. The very talk +becomes a barrier. The more you talk, the further away you move. If you are with +someone in silence, you are related. If the silence is really deep and there are no thoughts +in your mind and both the minds are totally silent, you are one. + +Two zeros cannot be two. Two zeros become one. If you add two zeros they don’t +become two, they become a bigger zero — one. And, really, a zero cannot be bigger — +more big, or less big. A zero is simply a zero. You cannot add something to it, you cannot +deduct something from it. A zero is whole. When ever you are silent with someone, you +are one. When you are silent with existence, you are one with it. + +This technique says be silent with existence and then you will know what God is. There + + + +is only one dialogue with existence and that is in silence. If you talk with existence, you +miss. Then you are enveloped in your own thoughts. + +Try this as an experiment. Try it with anything as an experiment — even with a rock. + +Be silent with it — take it in your hand and be silent — and there will be a communion. +You will move deep into the rock and the rock will move deep into you. Your secrets will +be revealed to the rock and the rock will reveal its secrets to you. But you cannot use +language with it. The rock doesn’t know any language. Because you use language, you +cannot be related to it. + +And man has lost silence completely. When you are not doing anything, then too you are +not silent; the mind goes on doing something or other. Because of this constant inner talk, +this continuous inner chattering, you are not related to anything. Not even to your +beloved ones are you related, because this chattering goes on. + +You may be sitting with your wife: you are chattering in your own mind; she is chattering +in her own mind. Both are chattering. They are far away from each other, poles away. It +is as if one is on one star, and the other on another star, and there is infinite space +between them. Then they feel that the intimacy is not there, and then they blame each +other — 'You don’t love me.’ + +This is not the question really. Love is not possible. Love is a flower of silence. It flowers +only in silence, because it flowers in communion. If you cannot be without thoughts, you +cannot be in love. And then to be in prayer is impossible — but even if we do prayer we +chatter. To us, prayer is just chattering with God. + + +We have become so conditioned to chattering that even if we go to the church or to the +temple we continue chattering there also. We chatter with God, we talk with God. This is +absolute nonsense. God, existence, cannot understand your language. Existence +understands only one language — that is of silence. And silence is neither Sanskrit nor +Arabic nor English nor Hindi. Silence is universal; it doesn’t belong to anyone. + +There are at least four thousand languages on earth, and everyone is enclosed in his own +language. If you don’t know his language you cannot be related to him. You cannot be +related. If I don’t understand your language and you don’t understand my language, we +cannot be related. We are strangers. We cannot penetrate each other, we cannot +understand, we cannot love. This is happening only because we don’t know a basic +universal language — that is silence. + +Really only through silence is one related. And if you know the language if silence then +you can be related to anything, because rocks are silent, trees are silent, the sky is silent +— it is existential. It is not only human, it is existential. Everything knows what silence is; +everything exists in silence. + +If a rock is there in your hand, the rock is not chattering within itself and you are +chattering — that’s why you cannot be related to the rock. And the rock is open, +vulnerable, inviting. + +The rock will welcome you, but you are chattering and the rock cannot understand the +chattering — that becomes the barrier. So even with human beings you cannot be in a +deep relationship; there can be no intimacy. Language, words, destroy everything. +Meditation means silence: not thinking about anything. Not thinking at all, just being — +open, ready, eager to meet, welcoming, receptive, loving, but not thinking at all. Then + + + +infinite love will happen to you, and you will never say that no one loves you. You will +never say it, you will never feel it. Now, whatsoever you do, you will say this and you +will feel this. You may not even say it. You may pretend that someone loves you, but +deep down you know. + +Even lovers go on asking each other, 'Do you love me?’ In so many ways they go on +enquiring continuously. Everyone is afraid, uncertain, insecure. In many ways they try to +find out whether really the lover loves them. And they can never be certain, because the +lover can say, 'Yes, I love you,’ but it will not give any guarantee. How can you be at +ease? How can you kn ow whether he is deceiving you or not? He can argue, he can +convince you. He can convince you intellectually, but the heart will not be convinced. So +lovers are always in agony. They cannot be convinced of the fact that the other loves. +How can you be convinced? + +Really there is no way to convince through language. + +And you are asking through language, and while the lover is there you are chattering in +the mind, questioning, arguing. You will never be convinced, and you will always feel +that you have not been loved, and this becomes the deepest misery. And this is happening +not because someone is not loving you. This is happening because you are closed in a +wall. You are closed within your thoughts; nothing can penetrate. The thoughts cannot be +penetrated unless you drop the. If you drop them the whole existence penetrates you. + +This sutra says: + +THINKING NO THING +WILL LIMITED-SELF UNLIMIT + +You will become unlimited. You will become whole. You will become universal. You +will be everywhere. And then you are joy. Now you are nothing but misery. Those who +are cunning, they go on deceiving themselves that they are not miserable, or they go on +hoping that something will change, something will happen, and they will achieve at the +end of life — but you are miserable. + +You can create faces, deceptions, false faces; you can go on smiling continuously, but +deep down you know you are in misery. That is natural. Confined in thoughts you will be +in misery. Unconfined, beyond thoughts — alert, conscious, aware, but unclouded by +thoughts — you will be joy, you will be bliss. + + +THE END. + + + +Chapter 58: In your hands + + +Question 1 + +TECHNIQUES ARE SHORTCUTS, REVOLUTIONS, BUT ARE NOT THESE +AGAINST TAO, SWABHAV, THE NATURE? + +They are. They are against tao, they are against swabhav. Any effort is against shabhav, +tao; effort as such is against tao. If you can leave everything to swabhav, tao, nature, then +no technique is needed, because that is the ultimate technique. If you can leave +everything to tao, that is the deepest surrender possible. You are surrendering yourself, +your future, your possibilities. You are surrendering time itself, all effort. This means +infinite patience, awaiting. + +If you can surrender everything to nature then there is no effort, then you don't do +anything. You just float. You are in a deep let-go. Things happen to you, but you are not +making any effort for them — you are not even seeking them. If they happen, it is okay; if +they don’t happen, it is okay — you have no choice. Whatsoever happens, happens; you +have no expectations and of course, no frustrations. + +Life flows by, you flow in it. You have no goal to reach, because with the goal effort +enters. You have nowhere to go, because if you have somewhere to go, effort will come +in; it is implied. You have nowhere to go, nowhere to reach, no goal, no ideal; nothing is +to be achieved — you surrender all. + +In this surrendering moment, in this very moment, all will happen to you. + +Effort will take time; surrender will not take time. Technique will take time; surrender +will not take time. That’s why I call it the ultimate technique. It is a no-technique. You +cannot practise it — you cannot practise surrender. If you practise, it is not surrender. + +Then you are relying on yourself; then you are not totally helpless; then you are trying to +do something — even if it is surrender, you are trying to do it. Then technique will come +in, and with technique time enters, future enters. + +Surrender is non-temporal; it is beyond time. If you surrender, this very moment you are +out of time, and all that can happen, will happen. But then you are not searching for it, +not seeking it; you are not greedy for it. You have no mind for it at all: whether it +happens or not, it is all the same to you. + +Tao means surrender — surrender to swabhav, to nature. Then you are not. Tantra and +Yoga are techniques. Through them you will reach to swabhav, but it will be a long +process. Ultimately after every technique you will have to surrender, but with techniques +it will come in the end; with tao, in tao, it comes in the beginning. If you can surrender +right now, no technique is needed, but if you cannot, and if you ask me how to surrender, +then a technique is needed. So, rarely in millions and millions of men, one can surrender +without asking how. If you ask 'how', you are not the right type who can surrender, +because the 'how' means you are asking for a technique. + + +These techniques are for all those who cannot get rid of this 'how'. These techniques are +just to get rid of your basic anxiety about 'how' — how to do it. If you can surrender +without asking, then no technique is needed for you. But then you would not have come + + + +to me, you could have surrendered any time, because surrender needs no teacher. A +teacher can teach only technique. + +When you seek, you are seeking technique; every seeking is a seeking for technique. +When you go to someone and ask, you are asking for a technique, for a method. +Otherwise there is no need to go anywhere. The very search shows that you have a deep +need for technique. These techniques are for you.Not that without technique it cannot +happen. It can happen, but it has happened to very few persons. And those few persons +are also really not rare: in their past lives they have been struggling with techniques, and +they have struggled so much with techniques that now they are fed up, they are bored. A +saturation point comes when you have asked again and again 'How? How? How? — and +ultimately the 'how' falls. Then you can surrender. + +In every way technique is needed. A Krishnamurti, he can say that no technique is +needed — but this is not his first life. And he couldn’t have said this in his past life. Even +in this very life many techniques were given to him, and he worked on them. You can +come to a point through techniques where you can surrender — you can throw all +techniques and simply be — but that too is through techniques. + + +It is against tao, because you are against tao. You have to be deconditioned. If you are in +tao then no technique is needed. If you are healthy then no medicine is needed. Every +medicine is against health. But you are ill; medicine is needed. This medicine will kill +your illness. It cannot give you health, but if the illness is removed, health will happen to +you. No medicine can give you health. Basically every medicine is a poison — but you +have gathered some poison; you need an antidote. It will balance, and health will be +possible. + +Technique is not going to give you your divinity, it is not going to give you your nature. +All that you have gathered around your nature it will destroy. It will only decondition +you. You are conditioned, and right now you cannot take a jump into surrender. If you +can take it, it is good — but you cannot take it. Your conditioning will ask, 'How?' Then +techniques will be helpful. + +When one lives in tao, then no yoga, no tantra, no religion is needed. One is perfectly +healthy; no medicine is needed. Every religion is medicinal. When the world lives in total +tao, religions will disappear. No teacher, no Buddha, no Jesus will be needed, because +everyone will be a Buddha or a Jesus. But right now, as you are, you need techniques. +Those techniques are antidotes. + +You have gathered around yourself such a complex mind that whatsoever is said and +given to you, you will complicate it. + +You will make it more complex, you will make it more difficult. If I say to you, +'Surrender,' you will ask, 'How?' If I say, 'Use techniques,’ you will ask, 'Techniques? +Are not techniques against tao?’ If I say, 'No technique is needed; simply surrender and +God will happen to you,’ you will immediately ask, 'How?’ — your mind. + +If I say, 'Tao is right here and now: you need not practise anything, you simply take a +jump and surrender,’ you will say, 'How? How can I surrender?’ If I give you a technique +to answer your 'how', your mind will say, 'But is not a method, a technique, a way, +against swabhav, against tao? If divinity is my nature, then how can it be achieved +through a technique? If it is already there, then the technique is futile, useless. Why waste +time with the technique?’ Look at this mind! + + + +I remember, once it happened that one man, a father of a young girl, asked composer +Leopold Godowsky to come to his house and give an audition to his daughter. She was +learning piano. Godowsky came to their house; patiently he heard the girl playing. When +the girl finished, the father beamed, and he cried in happiness and asked Godowsky, 'Isn't +she wonderful?' + +Godowsky is reported to have said, 'She is wonderful. She has an amazing technique. I +have never heard anyone play such simple pieces with such great difficulty. She has an +amazing technique. Playing such simple pieces with such great difficulty, I have never +seen anyone do before!’ + +This is what goes on happening in your mind. + +Even a simple thing you will make complicated, you will make difficult for yourself. And +this is a way of defence, this is a defence measure, because when you create difficulty +you need not do it — because first the problem must be solved and then you can do it. + +If I say surrender, you ask how. Unless I answer your 'how', how can you surrender? If I +give you a technique, your mind immediately creates a new problem. 'Why the +technique? Swabhav is there, tao is there, God is within you, so why this endeavor, this +effort?’ Unless this is answered, there is no need to do anything. + +Remember, you can go on in this vicious circle continuously for ever and ever. You will +have to break it somewhere and come out of it. Be decisive, because only with decision is +your humanity born. Only with decision do you become human. Be decisive. If you can +surrender, surrender. If you cannot surrender, then don’t create philosophical problems; +then use some technique. + +In both the ways the surrender will happen to you. If you can surrender right now, it is +okay. If you cannot surrender, then pass through techniques — that training is needed. It is +needed because of you, not because of swabhav, not because of tao. Tao needs no +training. It is needed because of you. And the techniques will destroy you. You will die +through the techniques, and the innennost nature will evolve. + +You have to be shattered completely. If you can shatter it in a jump — surrender. If you +cannot, then piecemeal — through techniques work on it. + +But remember one thing: your mind can create problems which are tricks — tricks to +postpone, to postpone decision. If the mind is not settled, you don’t feel guilty. You feel, +'What can I do? Unless something is absolute, clearcut, transparent, what can I do?’ Your +mind can create clouds around you, and your mind will not allow you to be transparent +ever — unless you decide. With decision clouds disappear. Mind is very diplomatic, mind +is political, and it goes on playing politics on you. It is very tricky, cunning. + +I have heard, once Mulla Nasrudin came to visit his son and daughter-in-law. He had +come for three days, but then he stayed for one week. Then the one week passed, and he +stayed for one month. Then the young couple started worrying — how to get rid of the old +man? So they discussed how to get rid of him, and they hit upon a plan. + +The husband said, 'Tonight you prepare soup, and I will say that there is too much salt in +it, it cannot be eaten, it is impossible to eat. And you have to say that there is not enough +salt in it. We will argue and we will start quarrelling, and then I will ask my father what +his opinion is, what he says. If he agrees with me, then you get mad and tell him to go +away. + + +If he agrees with you, I will get sore and I will tell him to go away immediately.’ + + + +The soup was prepared, and as it was planned, they started quarrelling and arguing. And +then the climax came. They were just on the verge of hitting each other and Nasrudin was +sitting silently watching. And then the son turned towards him and said, 'Pa what do you +say? Is there too much salt or not?’ + +So Nasrudin dipped his spoon in the soup, tasted it, meditated a moment upon the taste, +and then said, 'It suits me perfectly.’ He didn’t take any side. The whole plan was futile. +Your mind goes on working in this way. It will never take any side, because the moment +you take a side, action has to be there. It will not take any side; it will go on arguing. It +will never decide anything; it will be always in the middle. Whatsoever is said will be +argued, but it will never become a decision. And you can argue ad infinitum; there is no +end to it. Only decision will give you action, and only action will become transfonnation. +If you are really interested in a deep revolution within you, then decide — and don’t go on +postponing. Don’t be too philosophical; that is dangerous. For a seeker it is dangerous. + +For one who is not seeking really but just passing time, it is good, it is a good game. +Philosophy is a good game if you can afford it. But I don’t see that anyone can afford it +because it is wasting time. + + +So be decisive. If you can surrender, then surrender. Then there is no 'how' to it. If you +cannot, then practise some technique, because only then through technique will you come +to a point where surrender will happen. + +Question 2 + +IN THE NATURAL COURSE, AFTER MILLIONS OF YEARS AND LIVES, ONE +WILL BE ENLIGHTENED. BUT WE MIGHT HAVE ALREADY PASSED +THROUGH MILLIONS OF YEARS AND LIVES AND YET ARE NOT +ENLIGHTENED. WHY? + +You cannot ask why. You can ask why only if you are doing something. If nature is dong +something you cannot ask why; it is up to nature. And nature is not responsible; it is not +going to answer you. It is completely silent. And for nature, millions of lives are nothing; +for nature it may be just seconds. To you, millions of lives and years is a long history; for +nature it is nothing. Nature is not worried, and nature is not interested in you particularly. +Nature goes on working — someday it will happen, but you cannot ask why, because +nature is silent. + +If you are worried about why it has not happened yet, then you have to do something. If +worry has entered you, then you have to do something. Only your doing will help you to +come to a point where enlightenment can happen. Nature's ways are very patient, slow. +There is no hurry, because for nature there is no limit to time. It is eternal. There is no +beginning and no end. + +But man has come to a point: he has become conscious, he has started asking. + +A tree never asks — even the Bodhi tree under which Buddha became enlightened. The +tree will never ask, 'Why have I not become enlightened? — because I have also been +existing for as many millions of years as you have existed, Gautam. Why?’ The tree will +never ask. The tree is absolutely natural. The questioning makes man unnatural. The +unnatural has entered in you: you have started questioning why — why it has not +happened yet. + +This questioning is good, because it can lead you to a decisive moment where you can + + + +start working upon yourself. And man cannot leave it to nature, because man has become +conscious. You cannot leave it to nature now. That's why man has created religions. No +animal has any religion. There is no need: they are not asking, they are not in a hurry. In +nature everything is unhurried — moving so slowly as if not moving at all; continuously +repeating the same pattern, infinitely repeating the same circle. + +Man has become conscious. Man has become conscious of time, and the moment you +become conscious of time, you are thrown out of eternity. Then you are in a hurry. So as +man's consciousness evolves more, he is more hurried, he becomes more and more time +conscious. Go to a primitive society: they are not time conscious. The more civilized a +society, the more time conscious. + +A primitive society is nearer nature: unhurried, it moves slowly. Just as nature moves, it +moves. The more you become civilized, the more you become conscious of time. Really, +time can be the criterion: how civilized a society is can be known by how time conscious +it is. Then you are in a hurry, then you cannot wait, then you cannot leave it to nature. +You have to take it in your own hands. + +And man can take it in his own hands: he can do something and the process can be +finished sooner. It can even be finished in a single moment. All that millions of years +have not done, have not been able to do, you can do in a single moment. In that single +moment you can become so intense that millions of years and millions of lives are +travelled simultaneously. + +That's possible — because it is possible you are worried. Your worry is a symptom that +something which is possible you are not making actual — that is the worry, that is the +human dilemma. You can do it and you are not doing it — that creates an inner worry, +anguish. When you cannot do it the question never arises, there is no worry. The worry +shows that it is possible now that you can jump — many lives which are unnecessary you +can just by-pass — and you are not by-passing. You have become conscious, and you +have come above nature. + +Consciousness is a new phenomenon. You have come above nature and now you can +consciously evolve. + +Conscious evolution is revolution. You can do something about it. You are not just a +victim, not just a puppet. You can take your destiny in your hands. That is possible, and +because it is possible and you are not doing anything, it creates inner anxiety. And the +more you become aware that this is possible, the more the anxiety will be felt. + +A Buddha is very worried; you are not so worried. Buddha was very worried, in deep +anguish, suffering. Unless he attained he would live in hell, because he was perfectly +aware that something was absolutely possible, was just at hand, just by the corner, and he +felt, 'Still I am missing it. If I just stretch my hand it will happen — and my hand is +paralyzed. Just a step and I will be out of it — and I cannot take that step. I am afraid of +taking a jump.’ + +When you are near the goal, and you can feel it and you can see it and still you go on +missing, then you feel anguish. When you are very far away and you cannot feel it, you +cannot see it, you are not even aware that there is a goal, you are perfectly unaware of +any destiny, then there is no anxiety. + +Animals are not in anguish. They appear happy — happier then man. What is the reason? +Trees are even more happy than animals. They are perfectly unaware of what can happen, +of what is possible, of what is just near at hand. They are blissfully unaware. There is no + + + +anxiety. + + +They drift. Man becomes anxious, and the greater a man, the more anxiety will be there. +If you simply live, you are living an animal existence. Religious anguish arises the +moment you become aware that something is possible — IThe seed is there and I have to +do something. I have to do something and the seed will sprout. The flowers are not very +far away, and I can reap this crop’ — but still nothing is happening. A very impotent state +is felt. + +That was the Buddha’s condition before he became a Buddha. He was just on the verge of +committing suicide. You will have to pass through that. And you cannot leave it to +nature; you have to do something about it — and you can do. And the goal is not very far. +So don’t be depressed if you feel anxiety. If you feel a very tense anguish within you, a +suffering, agony, don’t feel depressed about it — that's a good sign. That shows you are +becoming more and more aware of that which is possible, and now you will never be at +ease unless it becomes actual. + +Man cannot leave it to nature because man has become conscious. Only a very minor part +of his being is conscious, but that changes everything. And unless your total being +becomes conscious, you cannot know again the simple happiness of the animal or of the +trees. There is only one way to know it now: to become more and more alert, more and +more aware, and more and more conscious. + +You cannot regress. There is no process for going back; no one can go back. You can +either remain where you are and suffer, or you have to go forward and go beyond +suffering. You cannot go back. + +Total unconsciousness is blissful, total consciousness is blissful — and you are in +between. A part of you has become conscious, and the major part of you is still +unconscious. You are divided. You have become two, you are not one. The integration is +lost. Animals are integrated and then saints are integrated. Man is disintegrated: a part +remains animal and a part has become saintly. There is a struggle, conflict, and +whatsoever you do you can never do with one heart. + +So there are two ways. One is just to deceive yourself — that is to become totally +unconscious again. You can take drugs, you can take alcohol, you can take intoxicants — +you fall back to the animal world. You drug the part that has become conscious; you +become totally unconscious. But this is a temporary deception; you will arise again. The +effect of the chemical will be lost and your consciousness will become conscious again. +The part which you have forcibly suppressed with alcohol or drugs or something else will +arise again, and then you will feel more suffering, because then you can compare. You +will feel more suffering. + +You can go on drugging yourself. There are many methods — not only chemical. + +There are religious methods. You can use a japa, a mantra: you can chant it and create an +intoxicating effect. You can do many things which can make you unconscious again, but +that is going to be temporary, you will have to come out — and you will come out with a +deeper suffering with you, because then you will be able to compare. If in +unconsciousness this is possible, what will be possible in total consciousness? You will +become more hungry for it, you will feel more starved. + +Remember one thing: totality is bliss. If you are unconscious totally then too it is bliss, +but you are not aware of it. Animals are happy but they are not aware of their happiness. + + + +So it is futile. It is just like when you are asleep you are happy, and whenever you are +awake you are unhappy. Totality is bliss. + +You can be total in consciousness also. Then there will be bliss and you will be perfectly +aware of it. This is possible through sadhana, through methods, through practising +techniques which increase your consciousness. You are not enlightened because you have +not done anything for it, but you have become aware that you are not enlightened. This +has been done by nature; in millions of years nature has made you aware. + +You may not be aware of the fact that man has stopped growing as far as body is +concerned. We have skeletons that are millions of years old, but there is no visible +change; they are similar to our skeletons. + +So for millions of years there has been no growth in the body, it has remained the same. +Even the brain has not grown; it has remained the same. As far as body is concerned, +evolution has done whatsoever could have been done. In a sense, man is now responsible +for his own growth. And the growth is not going to be of the physical; the growth is +going to be of the spiritual. + +The skeleton of a Buddha and your skeleton are not basically different, but you and +Buddha are absolutely different. Evolution is working horizontally; methods, techniques, +religions, they work vertically. Your body has stopped: it has come to a point, an omega +point. Now there is no further growth for it. Horizontally, evolution has stopped; now a +vertical evolution starts. Now, wherever you are, you have to take a jump vertically. That +vertical evolution will be of consciousness, not of body. And you are responsible for it. +You cannot ask nature why, but nature can ask you why you are not enlightened yet, +because everything is provided now. Your body has all that which is needed; you have a +Buddha’s body. Exactly whatsoever is needed for the buddha to happen to you, you have +got. Only a new arrangement, a new synthesis of all the elements that are given, and the +buddha will happen to you. Nature can ask you why you are not enlightened yet, because +nature has provided you with everything. + +And nature asking you will not be irrelevant, but you asking nature is absurd. + +You cannot be allowed to ask. Now you are aware and you can do something. All the +elements are given to you. The hydrogen is there, the oxygen is there, the electricity is +there; you have to just make certain efforts and experiments and the water will happen. +All that is needed for you to be enlightened is with you, but it is scattered. You have to +combine it, synthesize it, you have to make a hannony of it, and suddenly the flame will +arise which becomes enlightenment. All these techniques are for that. You have got +everything; just a know-how is needed, what to do, so that enlightenment happens to you. +Question 3 + +YOU SAY THAT MILLIONS OF LIVES AND MILLIONS OF YEARS OF NATURAL +EVOLUTION CAN BE AVOIDED THROUGH REACHING TOTAL AWARENESS +AND TOTAL FREEDOM CAN IT NOT BE ARGUED THAT KARMA, WITH ITS +NATURAL FORCES OF CAUSE AND EFFECT, SHOULD NOT BE INTERFERED +WITH BY ANY SHORTCUTS, OR IS IT ALSO THE WAY OF DIVINITY TO BRING +SUCH A POSSIBILITY WITHIN THE REACH OF THE EVOLVING WORLD, THE +EVOLVING SOUL? + + +Everything can be argued, but argument leads nowhere. You can argue, but how is that +argument going to help you? You can argue that the natural process of karma should not + + + +be interfered with — don’t interfere then. But then be happy in your misery — and you are +not. You want to interfere. If you can rely on the natural process, it is just wonderful — +but then don’t make any complaint. + +Don't ask, 'Why is this so?’ It is so because of the natural process of karma. You are +suffering? — you are suffering because of the natural process of karma, and otherwise is +not possible; don’t interfere. + +This is what the doctrine of fate, of kismat is — the doctrine of believing in fate. Then you +are not to do anything: whatsoever is happening is happening, and you have to accept it. +Then too it becomes a surrender, and you need not do anything. But the total +acceptability is needed. Really there is no need to interfere, but can you be in such a state +where you don’t interfere? You are constantly interfering with everything. You cannot +leave it to nature. If you can leave it, then nothing else is needed and everything will +happen to you. But if you cannot leave it, then interfere. And you can interfere, but the +process has to be understood. + +Really, meditating is not interfering in the process of karma; rather, it is taking a jump +out of it. Exactly it is not interfering; it is taking a jump out of the vicious wheel, out of +the vicious circle. The circle will go on, and the process will come to an end by itself. + +You cannot put an end to it, but you can be out of it, and once you are out of it, it +becomes illusory. + +For example, Raman died of cancer. His disciples tried to persuade him to go for +treatment. He said, 'Okay. If you like it and if it will make you happy, then treat me. + +But as far as I am concerned it is okay.’ The doctors were surprised, because his body +was suffering, it was in deep pain, but his eyes were without any pain. His body was +suffering deeply, but he was not suffering. + +The body is part of the karma, it is part of the mechanical circle of cause and effect, but +the consciousness can be beyond it, it can transcend it. He was just a witness. He was +seeing that the body was suffering, that the body was going to die, but he was a witness. +He was not interfering with it, not interfering at all. He was just watching whatsoever +was happening, but he was not in the vicious circle, he was not identified, he was not +within it then. + +Meditation is not an interference. Really, without meditation you are interfering every +moment. With meditation you go beyond; you become a watcher on the hill. Deep down +in the valley things go on, they continue, but they don’t belong to you. You are just an +onlooker. It is as if they are happening to somebody else, or as if they are happening in a +dream, or in a film on the screen. You are not interfering. You are just not within the +drama itself — you have come out. Now you are not an actor, you have become a +spectator. This is the only change. + +And when you are just a witness, the body will complete immediately whatsoever, has to +be completed. If you have many karmas for suffering, and now that you have become a +witness you are not going to be reborn again, the body will have to suffer in this life all +the suffering that would have been in many lives. + +So it happens many times that an enlightened man has to suffer many bodily ills, because +now there is no future birth, no future life. This is going to be the last body, so all the +karmas and the whole process has to be completed, finished. + +So it happens that if we look at Jesus' life through eastern eyes, then the crucifixion is a + + + +different phenomenon. To the western mind there is no succession of lives, no rebirth, no +reincarnation, so they don't really have a very deep analysis of the crucifixion. They have +a myth that Jesus suffered for us, his suffering was a salvation for us. But this is absurd; +and this is not true to the facts also, because if Jesus' suffering has become a salvation for +you, then why is humanity still suffering? It is suffering more than it ever suffered before. +After Jesus' crucifixion humanity has not entered into the kingdom of God. If he suffered +for us, if his crucifixion was a repentance of our guilt and sin, then he is a failure, +because the guilt continues, the sin continues, the suffering continues. Then his suffering +was in vain, then the crucifixion didn’t succeed. + +Christianity has simply a myth. But the eastern analysis of human life has a different +attitude. Jesus' crucifixion was all his suffering accumulated through his own karmas. + +And this was his last life, he would not enter the body again, so the whole suffering had +to be crystallized, concentrated, in a single point. + +That single point became the crucifixion. + +He did not suffer for anyone else — no one can suffer for anyone else. He suffered for +himself, for his past kannas. No one can make you free, because you are in the bondage +because of your karmas, so how can Jesus make you free? He can make himself a slave, +he can make himself a free man, he can liberate himself. Through the crucifixion the +account of his own karmas closed. He was finished, the chain had come to an end. Cause +and effect — they had come to an ed. This body would not be bom again; he would not +enter into another womb. If he was not an enlightened person, then he would have had to +suffer all this for many lives. It became concentrated in one point, in one life. + +You cannot interfere, and if you interfere you will create more misery for yourself. Don’t +interfere with karmas, but go beyond, be a witness to them Take them as a dream, not +real; just look at them and be indifferent. Don't get involved. Your body suffers — look at +the suffering. Your body is happy — look at the happiness. Don’t get identified — that's all +that meditation means. + +And don’t find alibis, don’t find excuses. Don't say that this can be argued. You can argue +anything, you are free to, but remember that your argument may be suicidal. You can +argue against yourself, and you can create an argument which is not going to help you, +which is not going to transform you, rather, which is going to become a hindrance. + +We go on arguing. + +Just today one girl came to meet me. She asked me, 'Tell me, is there really a God?' She +was ready to argue that there is no God. I looked at her face, her eyes. She was tense, +filled with argument; she wanted to fight about the point. Really deep down she wanted +that there is no God, because if there is God you are in trouble. If there is God then you +cannot remain whatsoever you are; then a challenge comes. God is a challenge. It means +you cannot be satisfied with yourself; something higher than you is possible. A higher +state, an absolute state of consciousness is possible. That’s what God means. + +So she was ready to argue, and she said, 'I am an atheist and I don’t believe in God.’ + +I told her, 'If there is no God, how can you not believe in him? And God is irrelevant. +Your belief and your disbelief, your argument for and your argument against is related to +you; it is not related to God. Why are you concerned? If there is no God, why have you +travelled so long, and why have you come to me to argue about something which is not? +Forget and forgive him. Go to your home, don’t waste your time. If he is not, then why +are you worried? Why this effort to prove that he is not? This effort shows something + + + +about you. You are afraid. If God is, then it is a challenge. If God is not, then you can +remain whatsoever you are; there is no challenge to life.' + + +A person who is afraid of challenges, risks, dangers, of changing himself, of mutation, +will always deny that there is God. The denial is his mind; the denial shows something +about him, not about God. + +I told her that God is not a thing which can be proved or disproved. God is not an object +about which we can take some opinion for or against. God is a possibility within you. It +is not something without; it is a possibility within you. If you travel to that possibility, he +becomes real. If you don’t travel up to that point, he is unreal. And if you argue against +him then there is no point in travelling; you remain the same. And this becomes a vicious +circle. + +You argue that God is not, and because of it you never travel towards him — because it is +an inner travel, an inner journey. You never travel, because how can you travel towards +the point which is not? So you remain the same. And when you remain the same you +never meet, you never encounter God. You never come to any feeling, to any vibration +from him. Then it is proved more for you that he is not. And the more it is proved, the +more you are far away, the more you are falling, the more the gap increases. + +So it is not a question of whether God is nor not, I told her. It is a question of whether +you want to grow or not. If you grow, your total growth will be the meeting, your total +growth will be the communion, your total growth will be the encounter. + +I told her one anecdote. + +One windy morning, just as the spring was ending, a snail started travelling upwards on a +cherry tree. Some sparrows which were just on a neighboring oak started laughing, +because it was not the season and there were no cherries on the tree, and this poor snail +was making so much effort to reach the top. They laughed at his expense. + +Then one sparrow flew down, came near to the snail and said, 'Darling, where are you +going? There are no cherries yet on the tree.’ + +But the snail never even paused; she continued her upward journey. Without pausing, the +snail said, 'But they will be there when I reach. They will be there when I reach there. It +will take a long time for me to reach to the top, and by that time cherries will be there.’ +God is not, but he will be there by the time you reach. It is not something which is +already there — it is never there. It is a growth. It is your own growth. When you reach to +a point where you are totally conscious, God is. But don’t argue. Rather than wasting +your energy in arguing, use your energy in transforming yourself. + +And energy is not much. If you divert your energy into argument you can become a +genius in arguing. But then you are wasting, it is at a great cost, because the same energy +can become meditation. You can become a logician: you can make very logical +arguments, you can find very convincing proofs or disproofs, but you will remain the +same. + +Your arguments are not going to change you. + +Remember one thing: whatsoever changes you is good. Whatsoever gives you growth, +expansion, increase in consciousness, is good. Whatsoever makes you static and +whatsoever protects your status quo is not good; it is fatal, suicidal. + +Question 4 + + + +SOMETIMES I FEEL IN A STATE OF NON-DOING, VERY PASSIVE, BUT MAY +AWARENESS OF WHAT IS HAPPENING AROUND ME SEEMS LESS. IN FACT, I +FEEL DETACHED FROM THINGS AROUND ME. THIS SOMEHOW MEANS +FALSE PASSIVITY, AS I IMAGINE ON-DOING SHOULD BE SYNONYMOUS +WITH INCREASED AWARENESS. CAN YOU PLEASE DEFINE THIS STATE? + +Ordinarily we are in a feverish state — active, but feverishly. If you become passive the +fever will be lost. If you become passive, non-doing, if you relax within yourself, activity +will be lost, fever will be lost, and the intensity that comes through fever will not be +there. You will feel a little dull, you will feel as if your awareness is decreasing. It is not +decreasing; only the feverish glow is decreasing. + +And it is good, so don't be afraid of it, and don’t think that this passivity is not real. This +is being said by your mind which needs and wants the feverish activity and the glow that +comes through fever. Fever is not awareness, but in fever you can have a very unhealthy +awareness, alertness. That is diseased; don’t ha nk er for it. Allow it to go, fall into +passivity. + + +In the beginning it will look like your awareness is decreasing rather than increasing. +Allow it to decrease, because whatsoever decreases with passivity was feverish, that's +why it decreases. Allow it to decrease. A moment will come when you will gain a +balance. In that point of balance there will be no increase and no decrease. That is a +healthy point; now the fever has gone. + +On that point of balance, whatsoever awareness you have, that is real, that is not feverish. +And if you can wait for that moment to come.... It is difficult, because in the beginning +you feel that you are losing grip, you are becoming really dead; your activity, your +alertness, everything has gone — you are relaxing into death. It appears that way because +whatsoever you know about life is feverish. It is not really life but just a fever, just a state +of tension, just a state of hyper-activity. So in the beginning.... And you know only one +state — this state of fever. You don't know anything else so how can you compare? + +When you become passive, relaxed, you will feel that something is lost. Allow i to be +lost. Remain with passivity. A balancing point will come soon when you will be right at +the point where there is no fever. Y ou will be simply your own self — not pushed by +someone else into activity, not pulled by someone else into activity. Now activity will +start happening to you, but it will be spontaneous, it will be natural. + +You will do something, but you will not be pulled and pushed. + +And what is the criterion by which to know whether this activity is not forced on you, is +not feverish? This is the point: if the activity is spontaneous you will not feel any tension +through it, you will not feel any burden. You will enjoy it. And the activity will become +an end unto itself; there will be no end. This will not be a means to reach somewhere +else; it will be just an overflow of your own energy. And this overflow will be here and +now; it will not be for something in the future. You will enjoy it. + +Whatsoever it is — digging a hole in the garden, or pruning the trees, or just sitting, or +walking, or eating — whatsoever you are doing will become absolute in itself, total +action. And after it you will not be tiered; rather, you will feel refreshed. A feverish +activity tires you; it is ill. A natural activity nourishes you; you feel more energetic, more +vital after it. You feel more alive after it. It gives you more life. + + + +But in the beginning when you start becoming passive and you fall into non-doing, it is +bound to be felt that you are losing awareness. No, you are not losing awareness. You are +simply losing a feverish type of mentation, a feverish type of alertness. You will settle +into passivity and a natural awareness will happen. + +This is the difference between a feverish alertness and natural awareness; this is the +difference: in feverish alertness there is a concentration; it excludes everything. + +You can concentrate on a thing. You are listening to me. If it is a feverish alertness then +you listen to me and you are totally unaware of anything else. But if it is a passive +awareness, not feverish, but balanced, natural, then if a car passes by, you hear that car +also. You are simply aware. You are aware of everything; of whatsoever is happening +around you. And this is the beauty of it — that the car passes by and you hear the noise +but it is not a disturbance. + +If you are feverishly attentive and you hear the car, you will miss listening to me; it will +be a disturbance, because you don't k now how to be totally, simply aware of everything +that is happening. You know only one way: how to be alert of one thing at the cost of +everything else. If you move to something else then you lose the contact with the first +thing. If you are listening to me in a feverish mind, then anything can disturb you. +Because your alertness goes there, then you are cut off from me. It is one-pointed; it is +not total. A natural, passive awareness is just total; nothing disturbs it. It is not +concentration, it is meditation. + +Concentration is always feverish, because you are forcing your energy to one point. +Energy by itself flows in all directions. If has no direction in which to move; it simply +enjoys flowing all over. We create conflict because we say, 'This is good to listen to; that +is bad.’ + +If you are doing your prayer and a child starts laughing, it is a disturbance — because you +cannot conceive of a simple awareness in which the prayer continues and the child goes +on laughing and there is no conflict between the two; they both are part of a bigger +whole. + +Try this: be totally alert, totally aware. Don’t concentrate. Every concentration is tiring, +you feel tired, because you are forcing energy unnaturally. Simple awareness is inclusive +of all. When you are passive and non-doing then everything happens around you. + +Nothing disturbs you and nothing by-passes you. Everything happens and you know it, +you witness it. + +A noise comes: it happens to you, it moves within you, then it passes, and you remain as +you were. Just as in an empty room: if there was no one here the traffic would go on +passing, the noise would come into this room, then it would pass==and the room would +remain unaffected, as if nothing had happened. In passive awareness you remain +unaffected. Everything goes on happening; just passes you, but never touches you. You +remain unscarred. In feverish concentration everything touches you, impresses you. + +One more point about this. In the eastern psychology we have a word, SANSKAR — +conditioning. If you are concentrating on something you will be conditioned, you will get +a sanskar, you will get impressed by something. If you are simply aware — passively +aware, not concentrating, not focusing yourself, just being there — nothing conditions +you. + + +Then you don’t accumulate any sanskar, you don’t accumulate any impressions. You go + + + +on remaining virgin, pure, unscarred; nothing touches you. If one can be passively aware, +he passes through the world but the world never passes through him. + +One Zen monk, Bokuju, used to say, 'Go and cross the stream, but don't allow the water +to touch you.’ And there was no bridge over the stream near his monastery. + +Many would try, but when they crossed, of course the water would touch them. So one +day one monk came and he said, 'You give us puzzles. We try to cross that stream; there +is no bridge. If there was a bridge, of course we could have crossed the stream and the +water would not have touched us. But we have to pass through the stream — the water +touches.’ + +So Bokuju said, 'I will come and I will cross and you watch.’ And Bokuju crossed. Of +course, water touched his feet, and they said, 'Look, the water has touched you!’ + +Bokuju said, 'As far as I know, it has not touched me. I was just a witness. The water was +touching my feet, but not me. I was just witnessing.’ + +With passive alertness, with witnessing, you pass through the world. You are in the +world, but the world is not in you. + +THE END. + + + +Chapter 59: Watching from the hills + + +SUPPOSE YOU CONTEMPLATE SOMETHING +BEYOND PERCEPTION, + +BEYOND GRASPING, + +BEYOND NOT BEING. + +- YOU. + +I AM EXISTING. + +THIS IS MINE. + +THIS IS THIS. + +OH BELOVED, + +EVEN IN SUCH KNOW ILLIMITABLY. + +Man is Janus-Faced — animal and divine both. Animal belongs to his past, divine belongs +to his future, and this creates the difficulty. The past has passed, it is no more; just a +shadow of it lingers on. And the future is still the future, it has not yet come; it just a +dream, just a possibility. And between these two exists man — the shadow of the past and +the dream of the future. He is neither and he is both. + +He is both because the past is his — he was animal. He is both because the future is his — +he can be divine. And he is not both, because the past is no more and the future is yet to +be. + +Man exists as a tension between these two: that which was and that which can be. This +creates a conflict, a constant struggle to realize, to be something. In a sense, man is not. +Man is just a step from the animal to the divine — and a step is nowhere. It was +somewhere and it will be somewhere, but right now it is nowhere, just hanging in the air. +So whatsoever man is doing — whatsoever I say — he is never satisfied in it, never +content, because two diametrically opposite existences meet in him. + +If the animal is satisfied then the divine is in discontent. If the divine is satisfied then the +animal is in discontent. A part is always in discontent. + +If you move to the animal, in a way you satisfy part of your being, but immediately in +that satisfaction dissatisfaction arises, because the opposite part, your future, is just +contrary to it. The satisfaction of the animal is the dissatisfaction of the possibility of +your future. If you satisfy your divine possibility the animal revolts; it feels hurt. A +definite discontent arises within you. You cannot satisfy both, and satisfying one, the +other is dissatisfied. + +I remember one anecdote. One sports car enthusiast reached the pearly gates, and St. + +Peter welcomed him. He had come with his Jaguar, and the first thing he asked St. Peter +was this: 'Are there beautiful highways in heaven?’ + +St. Peter said, 'Yes, they have the most beautiful highways, but there is one difficulty — +in heaven they don’t allow automobiles.’ + +The speed-fiend said, 'Then it is not for me. Then please arrange for me to be sent to the +other place. I would like to go to hell. I cannot leave my Jaguar.’ + +So it was arranged. He reached hell, he came to the gates, and Satan welcomed him and +said that he was very happy to see him. He said, 'You are just like me; I am also a lover +of Jaguars.’ + + + +The speed-fiend said, 'Fine, give me the map of your highways.’ + + +Satan became sad. He said, 'Sir, we don’t have any highways down here — that is the hell +of it!’ + +This is the situation of man. Man is Janus-faced, a double being, split in two. If you +satisfy one thing, then something becomes frustrating to your other part. If you do +otherwise, then the other part is dissatisfied. Something is always lacking. And you +cannot satisfy both, because they are diametrically opposite. + +And everyone is doing this impossible thing, trying to do this — to have a compromise +somewhere so both heaven and hell can meet; so body and soul, the lower and the higher, +the past and the future, can somewhere meet and have a compromise. We have been +doing that for many lives. It has not happened, and it is not going to happen. The whole +effort is absurd, impossible. + +These techniques are not concerned with creating a compromise within you. These +techniques are to give you a transcendence. These techniques are not to satisfy the divine +against the animal. That is impossible. That will create more turmoil within you, more +violence, more struggle. These techniques are not to satisfy your animal against the +divine. These techniques are just to transcend the duality. They are neither for the animal +nor for the divine. + +Remember, that is the basic difference between other religions and tantra. Tantra is not a +religion, because religion basically means: for the divine against the animal — so every +religion is part of the conflict. + +Tantra is not a struggle technique, it is a transcendence technique. It is not to fight with +the animal, it is not for the divine. It is against all duality. It is neither for nor against +really. It is simply creating a third force within you, a third center of existence where you +are neither animal nor divine. For tantra that third point is ADVAITA, that third point is +non-duality. + +Tantra says you cannot reach the one by fighting through duality. You cannot come to a +non-dual point by choosing one thing in the struggle in duality. Choice will not lead you +to the one; only a choiceless witnessing. + +This is very foundational to tantra, and because of this tantra was never really understood +rightly. It has suffered a long, a centuries-old misunderstanding, because the moment +tantra says it is not against the animal, you start feeling as if tantra is for the animal. And +the moment tantra says it is not for the divine, you then start thinking that tantra is against +the divine. + +Really, tantra is for a choiceless witnessing. Don’t be with the animal, don’t be with the +divine, and don’t create a conflict. Just go back, just go away, just create a gap between +you and this duality and become a third force, a witnessing, from where you can see both +the animal and the divine. + +I told you that the animal is the past and the divine is the future, and past and future are +opposed. + +Tantra is in the present. It is neither past nor future. Just this very moment, don’t belong +to the past and don’t hanker for the future. Don’t long for the future and don’t be +conditioned by the past. Don’t allow the past to become a hangover and don’t create any +projections in the future. Remain true to this very moment, here and now, and you + + + +transcend. Then you are neither animal nor divine. + +For tantra, to be such is to be God. To be such, in this suchness of the moment, where +past is unrelated and future is not created, you are free, you are freedom. + +These techniques are not religious in this sense, because religion is always opposed to the +animal. Religion creates a conflict. So if you are really religious you will become +schizophrenic, you will be split. All religious civilizations are split civilizations. They +create neurosis, because they create inner conflict. They divide you into two, and one part +of your being becomes the enemy. Then your whole energy is dissipated fighting with +yourself. + +Tantra is not religious in that sense, because tantra doesn’t believe in any conflict, in any +violence. And tantra says don’t fight with yourself. Just be aware. Don’t be aggressive and +violent with yourself. Just be a witness, a watcher. In the moment of witnessing you are +neither; both the faces disappear. In that moment of witnessing you are not human. You +simply are. + +You exist without any label. You exist without any name. You exist without any +category. You are without being anyone in particular — a simple amness, a pure being. +These techniques are for that pure being. + +Now I will discuss the techniques. + +The first technique: + +SUPPOSE YOU CONTEMPLATE SOMETHING +BEYOND PERCEPTION, + +BEYOND GRASPING, + +BEYOND NOT BEING +- YOU. + +SUPPOSE YOU CONTEMPLATE SOMETHING BEYOND PERCEPTION - that +which cannot be seen, which cannot be perceived. But can you imagine something which +cannot be seen? Imagination is always of that which can be seen. How can you imagine +something, how can you suppose something, which cannot be perceived? + +That which you can perceive you can imagine. You cannot even dream something which +is not capable of being seen and perceived. That's why even your dreams are shadows of +reality. Even your imagination is not pure imagination, because whatsoever you can +imagine you have kn own somehow. You can create new combinations, but all the +elements of the combination are known and perceived. + +You can imagine a golden mountain flying in the sky like a cloud. You have not +perceived such a thing ever, but you have perceived a cloud, you have perceived a +mountain, you have perceived gold. These three elements can be combined. Imagination +is not original; it is always a combination of something you have perceived. + + +This technique says: + +SUPPOSE YOU CONTEMPLATE SOMETHING +BEYOND PERCEPTION + + + +It is impossible, b ut that's why it is worth doing, because in the very effort something +will happen to you. Not that you will become capable of perceiving — if you try to +perceive something which cannot be perceived, all perception will be lost. In the very +effort, if you try to see something which you have never seen, all that you have ever seen +will disappear. + +If you persist in the effort, many images will come to you — you have to discard them, +because you know that you have seen this; this can be perceived. You may not have seen +it actually as it is, but even if you can imagine it, it can be perceived. Discard it. Go on +discarding. This technique says to persist for that which cannot be perceived. + +What will happen? If you go on discarding, it is going to be an arduous effort, because +many images will bubble up. Your mind will supply many images, many dreams; many +conceptions will come, many symbols. Your mind will create now combinations, but go +on discarding unless something happens which cannot be perceived. What is that? + +If you go on discarding, nothing will happen to you as an object; only the screen of the +mind will be there with no image, with no symbol, with no dream on it, no picture on it. +In that moment a metamorphosis happens. + +When the screen is simply there without any image, you become aware of yourself. You +become aware of the perceiver. When there is nothing to be perceived, the whole +attention changes. The whole consciousness reflects back. When you have nothing to see, +for the first time you become aware of your own self. You start seeing yourself. + +This sutra says: + +SUPPOSE YOU CONTEMPLATE SOMETHING +BEYOND PERCEPTION, + +BEYOND GRASPING, + +BEYOND NOT BEING +- YOU. + +Then you happen to yourself. For the first time you will become aware of the one who +has been perceiving, who has been grasping, who has been knowing. But this subject is +always hidden in objects. You know certain things but you never know the knower. The +knower is lost in knowledge. + +I see you, then I see someone else, and this procession goes on. From birth to death I will +see this and that and that, and I will go on seeing and seeing. And the seer, the one who +was seeing this procession, is forgotten; it is lost in the crowd. The crowd is of objects, +and the subject is lost. + +This sutra says if you try to CONTEMPLATE SOMETHING BEYOND PERCEPTION, +BEYOND GRASPING — which you cannot grasp by the mind — BEYOND NOT +BEING... Immediately the mind will say that if there is something which cannot be seen +and cannot be grasped, it is not. The mind will immediately react that if something is not +seeable, not perceivable, not graspable, then it is not. + +The mind will say that it doesn’t exist. Don’t become a victim of the mind. + +This sutra says: ... BEYOND PERCEPTION, BEYOND GRASPING, BEYOND NOT +BEING. The mind will say that this is nothing, this cannot exist, this is a not-being. The +sutra says, don't believe in it. There is something which is being beyond not-being, which +exists and which cannot be perceived, and which is not graspable: that is you. + + + +You cannot perceive yourself, or can you? Can you imagine any situation in which you +can encounter yourself, in which you can know yourself? You can go on using the word +'self-knowledge', which is absolutely absurd, because you cannot know the self. The self +is always the knower. It cannot be reduced to a known, it cannot be reduced to an object. +For example, if you think that you can know the self, then the self that you know will not +be your self, but the one who is knowing the self will be the self. You will always remain +the knower; you cannot become the known. You cannot put yourself in front of you; you +will always recede back. Whatsoever you know cannot be yourself — this means that you +cannot know it. You cannot know it the way you know other things. + +I cannot see myself the way I see you. Who will see? Because every relationship of +knowledge, seeing, perception, melans that there are at least two things: the known and +the knower. Self-knowledge is not possible in this sense, because there is only one. + +There the knower and the known are one; the observer and the observed are one. You +cannot convert yourself into an object. + +So the word 'self-knowledge' is just wrong, but it connotes something, it says something +which is true. You can know yourself in a very different sense, in an altogether different +sense than from how you know other things. When there is nothing to be known, when +all objects have disappeared, when all that can be perceived and grasped is no more, +when you have discarded all, suddenly you become aware of yourself. And this +awareness is not dual: there is no object and no subject. There is simply subjectivity. + +This awareness is a different type of knowing. This awareness gives you a different +dimension of existence. You are not divided in two. You are aware of yourself. You are +not perceiving, you cannot grasp it, and yet it is existential — the most existential. + +Try to think in this way. We have energy: that energy goes on moving to objects. Energy +cannot be static. Remember it as one of the ultimate laws: energy cannot be static, it is +dynamic. It cannot be otherwise. Dynamism is its very nature — energy moves. When I +see you, my energy moves towards you. When I perceive you, a circle is made. My +energy moves to you, then it comes back to me — a circle is made. + +If my energy moves to you and doesn’t come back, I will not know you. + +A circle is needed: the energy must go and then come back to me. With its coming back it +bring you to me. I know you. Knowledge means that energy has made a circle. It has +moved from the subject to the object, and then it has moved again and come back to the +original source. If I go on living in this way — making circles with others — I will never +know myself, because my energy is filled with energies of others. It brings those images, +it delivers those images to me. This is how you gather knowledge. + +This technique says to allow the object to disappear from there. Allow your energy to +move in a vacuum, in emptiness. It goes from you, but there is no object to be grasped by +it, not object to be perceived by it. It moves and comes back to you through emptiness; +there is no object. It brings no knowledge to you. It comes vacant, empty, pure. It brings +nothing. It brings only itself. It comes virgin — nothing has entered into it; it remains +pure. + +This is the whole process of meditation. You are sitting silently, your energy is moving. +There is no object with which it can be contaminated, with which it can become +entangled, with which it can become impressed, with which it can become one. Then you +bring it back to yourself. There is no object, no thought, no image. Energy moves, the + + + +movement is pure, and then it comes back to you — virgin. As it left you it comes; it +carries nothing. + +An empty vehicle, it comes to you, it hits you. There is no knowledge carried by it; it is +coming only by itself. In that penetration of pure energy you become aware of yourself. +If your energy is bringing something else, then you will become aware of that something. +You look at a flower. The energy is bringing the flower to you — the image of the flower, +the smell of the flower, the color of the flower. The energy is bringing the flower to you. +It is introducing you to the flower. Then you become acquainted with the flower. The +energy is covered by the flower. You never become acquainted with the energy, the pure +energy which is you. You are moving to the other and coming back to the source. + +If there is nothing to impress it, if it comes unconditioned, if it comes as it had gone, if it +brings itself, nothing else, you become aware of yourself. This is a pure circle of energy + +— energy moving not to something else, but within you, creating a circle within you. + +Then there is no one else, only you moving within yourself. This movement becomes +self-knowledge, self-illumination. Basically, all meditation techniques, all of them, are +different variations of this. + +SUPPOSE YOU CONTEMPLATE SOMETHING +BEYOND PERCEPTION, + +BEYOND GRASPING, + +BEYOND NOT BEING + +- YOU. + +If this can happen, then for the first time you will become aware of yourself, of your +being, of your existence — the subjectivity. + + +Knowledge is of two kinds: knowledge of objects, and knowledge of the subjectivity. +Knowledge of the known, the knowable, and knowledge of the knower. And a man can +know millions and millions of things, he can become acquainted with the whole world, +but if he is not aware of the knower he is ignorant. He may be knowledgeable, but he is +not wise. He may have collected much information, much knowledge, but the basic thing +which makes one a knower is lacking — he is not aware of himself. + +In the Upanishads there is a story. Svetaketu, a young boy, came back from his master to +his home. He had passed all his examinations, and he had passed well. All that the master +could give him, he had collected. He had become very egoistic. + +When he reached his father's house, the first thing the father asked Svetaketu was this: +'You seem to be too filled with knowledge, and your knowledge is making you very +egoistic — the way you walk, the way you have entered the house. I have only one +question to ask you. Have you known that who knows all? Have you known that by +knowing which everything is known? Have you known yourself?’ + +Svetaketu said, 'But there was no course for it in the school, and the master never +discussed it. I have known everything that can be known. You ask me anything and I will +answer you. But what type of question are you raising? It was never discussed.’ + + +The father said, 'Then you go back, and unless you know that by knowing which + + + +everything is known, and without knowing which nothing is known, don’t come back. +First know yourself.' + +Svetaketu went back. He asked the master, 'My father says I cannot be allowed to go +back home, I cannot be welcomed there, because he says that in our family we have been +Brahmins not only by birth. We have been knowers, knowers of Brahma, Brahmins, not +only by birth but by real authentic knowledge. So he said, "Unless you become a real +Brahmin, not by birth, but by knowing the Brahma, by knowing the ultimate, don’t enter +the house. You are not worthy of us." So now teach me that.’ + +The teacher said, 'All that can be taught I have taught you. And that is something which +cannot be taught. So you do one thing: you simply be available for it. It cannot be +directly taught. You simply be receptive; some day it will happen. You take all the cows +of the ashram...’ The ashram had many cows; they say four hundred. 'You take all the +cows to the forest. Remain with the cows: stop thinking, stop verbalizing, just become a +cow. Remain with the cows, love them, and be silent as cows are silent. When the cows +become one thousand, come back.’ + +So Svetaketu went with four hundred cows to the forest. There was no use in thinking, +there was no one to talk to. By and by his mind became just like a cow. + +He sat silently under the trees, and for many years he had to wait, because only when the +cows became one thousand could he come back. By and by language disappeared from +his mind. By and by society disappeared from his mind. By and by he became not a +human being at all. His eyes became just like cows’. + +And the story is very beautiful. The story says he forgot how to count — because if +language disappears and verbalizations disappears.... He forgot how to count, he forgot +when he had to return. The story is beautiful. The cows said, 'Svetaketu, now we are one +thousand. Now let us go back to the master's house. He must be waiting.' + +Svetaketu came back, and the master said to the other disciples, 'Count the cows.’ + +The cows were counted and the disciples said, 'Yes, there are one thousand cows.’ + +And the master is reported to have said, 'Not one thousand, one thousand and one — that’s +Svetaketu.’ + +He was standing amidst the cows, silent, just being there, with no thought, with no mind. +Just like a cow — pure, simple, innocent. And the master said, 'You need not enter. Now +go back to your father's house. You have known; it has happened to you. Why have you +come again to me? It has happened to you.' + +It happens: when there is no object in the mind to know, the knower happens to you. +When the mind is not filled by thoughts, when there is not a single ripple, when there is +not a single wave, you are there alone. + +There is nothing other than you. Obviously you become aware of your self; for the first +time you become filled by yourself. A self-illumination happens. + +This sutra is one of the foundational ones. Try it. It is arduous, because the habit of +thinking, the habit of clinging to objects, to that which can be perceived and that which +can be grasped, is so deep-rooted, so ingrained, that it will take time and a very persistent +effort not to be involved in objects, not to be involved in thoughts, but to just become a +witness and discard them and say, 'No, not this, not this.’ + +The whole technique of the Upanishads is condensed in two words; NETI, NETI — not +this, not this. Whatsoever comes to the mind, say, 'Not this.’ Go on saying and discarding + + + +and throwing all the furniture out. The room has to be empty, totally empty. When +emptiness is there, then that happens. If something else is there you go on being +impressed by it, and you cannot know yourself. Your innocence is lost in objects. A +thought-ridden mind is moving outwards. You cannot be related to yourself. + +The second technique: + +I AM EXISTING. + +THIS IS MINE. + +THIS IS THIS. + +0 BELOVED, + +EVEN IN SUCH KNOW ILLIMITABLY. + +1 AM EXISTING. You never enter deeply into this feeling. I AM EXISTING. You are +existing, but you never dig deep into this phenomenon. + +Shiva says: I AM EXISTING. THIS IS MINE. THIS IS THIS. OH BELOVED, EVEN +IN SUCH KNOW ILLIMITABLY. + +I will tell you one Zen anecdote. Three friends were walking along a road. Evening was +just falling and the sun was setting when they become aware of a monk standing on a +nearby hill. They started talking about the monk, wondering what he was doing there. + +One of them said, 'He must be waiting for his friends. He must have gone for a walk +from his hermitage and his friends are left behind, so he is waiting for them to come.’ + +The other denied that and said, 'This is not right, because if a person waits for someone, +sometimes he will look backwards. But he is not looking backwards at all. So my +assumption is this — that he is not waiting for anyone. Rather, he must have lost his cow. +Evening is coming near, and the sun is setting, and soon it will be dark, so he is looking +for his cow. He is standing there on the hilltop, and looking for where the cow is in the +forest.’ + +The third one said, 'This cannot be right, because he is standing so silently, not moving at +all, and it seems that he is not looking at all; his eyes are closed. He must be in prayer. He +is not looking for any lost cow or waiting for some friends who have been left behind.;’ +They couldn’t decide. They argued and argued and then they said, 'We must go to the top +of the hill and ask the man himself what he is doing.’ + + +So they reached the monk. The first one said, 'Are you waiting for your friends who are +left behind to come?’ + +The monk opened his eyes and said, 'I am not waiting for anyone. And I have neither +friends nor enemies to wait for.’ He closed his eyes again. + +The other one said, 'Then I must be right. Are you looking for your cow which is lost in +the forest?’ + +He said, 'No, I am not looking for anyone — for any cow or anyone. I am not interested in +anything except myself.’ + +So the third one said, ' Then certainly, definitely, you are doing some prayer or some +meditation.’ + +The monk opened his eyes and said, 'I am not doing anything at all. I am just being here. + +I am just being here, not doing anything at all. I am just being here.’ + +This is what Buddhists say meditation is. If you do something, it is not meditation — you + + + +have moved far away. If you pray, it is not meditation — you have started chattering. If +you use some word, it is not prayer, it is not meditation — the mind has entered in. That +man said the right thing. He said, 'I am just being here, not doing anything.’ + +This sutra says this: I AM EXISTING. Go deep into this feeling. Just sitting, go deep into +this feeling — I AM EXISTING, I AM. Feel it, don’t think it, because you can say it in the +mind — I AM — and it is futile. Your head is your undoing. + +Don’t go on repeating in the head I AM, I AM EXISTING. It is futile, it is useless. You +miss the point. + +Feel it deep down in your bones. Feel it all over your body. Feel it as a total unit, not in +the head. Just feel it — I AM. Don’t use the words 'I am’. Because I am relating to you, I +am using the words. 'I am’. And Shiva was relating to Parvati, so he had to use the words +'I am existing’. Don’t. Don’t go on repeating. This is not a mantra. You are not to repeat I +AM EXISTING, I AM EXISTING. If you repeat this you will fall asleep, you will +become self-hypnotized. + +If you go on repeating a certain thing, you become auto-hypnotized. First you get bored, +then you feel sleepy, and then your awareness is lost. You will come back from it very +much refreshed, just like after a deep sleep. It is good for health, but it is not meditation. +If you are suffering from insomnia you can use chanting, a mantra. It is as good as any +tranquillizer, or even better. You can go on repeating a certain word: repeating constantly +in a monotonous tone you will fall asleep. + +Anything that creates monotony will give you deep sleep. So psychoanalysts and +psychologists go on telling people who suffer from insomnia to just listen to the tick-tock +of the clock. Go on listening to it and you will fall asleep, because the tick-tock becomes +a lullaby. + +The child in the mother's womb sleeps continuously for nine months, and the heart of the +mother goes on. + +.. tick-tock. That becomes a conditioning, a deep conditioning — the continuous repetition +of the heart. That's why whenever someone takes you near his heart, you feel good. Tick- +tock — you feel sleepy, relaxed. Anything that gives monotony gives relaxation; you can +fall asleep. + +In a village you can sleep more deeply than in a city, because a village is monotonous. +The city is not monotonous. Every moment something new is happening; the traffic +noises go on changing. In a village everything is monotonous, the same. Really, in a +village there is no news, nothing happens; everything moves in a circle. So villagers sleep +deeply, because life around them is monotonous. In a city, sleep is difficult, because life +around you is very sensational; everything changes. + +You can use any mantra: RAM, RAM, AUM, AUM — anything. You can use Jesus +Christ; you can use Ave Maria. You can use any word and monotonously chant it; it will +give you deep sleep. You can even do this: Raman Maharshi used to give the technique +WHO AM I? And people started using it as mantra. They would sit with closed eyes and +they would go on repeating. 'Who am I? Who am I? Who am I?’ It had become a mantra. +That was not the purpose. + +So don’t make it a mantra, and sitting, don’t say, 'I am existing.’ There is no need. +Everyone knows, and you know already that you are existing; there is no need, it is futile. + + +Feel it — I AM EXISTING. Feeling is a different thing, totally different. Thinking is a + + + +trick to escape from feeling. It is not only different, it is a deception. + +What do I mean when I say to feel I AM EXISTING? I am sitting in this chair. If I start +feeling I AM EXISTING, I will become aware of many things: the pressure on the chair, +the touch of the velvet, the air passing through the room, the noise touching my body, the +blood circulating silently, the heart, the breathing that goes on continuously, and a subtle +vibrating feeling of the body. Because the body is a dynamism; it is not a static thing. +You are vibrating. Continuously there is a subtle trembling and while you are alive it will +continue. The trembling is there. + +You will become aware of all these multidimensional things. And the more you become +aware of the many things that are happening.... If right now you become aware of +whatsoever is happening within you and without, this is what is meant by I AM +EXISTING. If you become aware in this way, thinking will stop, because when you feel +you are existing it is such a total phenomenon that thinking cannot continue. + +In the beginning you will feel thoughts floating. By and by, the more you get rooted in +existence, the more and more you settle down in the feeling of being, the thoughts will be +far away, you will feel a distance — as if those thoughts are not now happening to you, +but they are happening to someone else, very very far away. + +There is a distance. And then, when you are really rooted, grounded in the being, mind +will disappear. You will be there with not a single word, not a single mental image. + +Why does this happen? — because mind is a particular activity for relating with others. If +I am to relate with you I will have to use my mind, language, words. It is a social +phenomenon; it is a group activity. So even if you are talking while alone, you are not +alone — you are talking to someone. Even when you are alone, when you are talking you +are talking to someone; you are not alone. How can you talk alone? Someone is present +in the mind and you are talking to him. + +I was reading the autobiography of a professor of philosophy. He relates that one day he +was going to take his daughter, who was five years old, to school, and after leaving her at +the school he was going to go to the university to deliver his lecture. So he was preparing +his lecture on the way, and he forgot all about his daughter who was sitting just by his +side in the car, and he started lecturing loudly. The girl listened for a few moments and +then she asked, 'Daddy, are you talking with me or without me?’ + +Even when you are talking it is never without, it is always with — with someone. He may +not be present, but to you he is present; for your mind he is there. All thinking is a +dialogue. Thinking as such is a dialogue, it is a social activity. + +That’s why if a child is brought up without any society, he will not know any language. +He will not be able to verbalize. It is society which gives you language; without society +there is no language. Language is a social phenomenon. + +When you get grounded within yourself, there is no society, there is no one. You alone +exist. Mind disappears. You are not relating to anyone, not even in imagination, so mind +disappears. You are there without the mind, and this is what meditation is — being +without the mind. Being perfectly alert and conscious, not unconscious, feeling existence +in its totality, in its multidimensionality, but the mind has suddenly disappeared. + +And with the mind many things disappear. With the mind, your name, with the mind, +your form; with the mind, that you are a Hindu or a Mohammedan or a Parsee; with the +mind, that you are good or bad; with the mind, that you are a saint or a sinner; with the +mind, that you are ugly or beautiful — everything disappears. All that is labelled on you + + + +suddenly is not there. You are in your pristine purity. In your total innocence you are +there; in your virginity — grounded, not floating, rooted in that which is. + +With the mind you can move into the past. With the mind you can move into the future. +Without mind you cannot move into the past or into the future. Without mind you are +here and now — just this moment is all eternity. + +Nothing exists except this moment. Bliss happens. You need not go in any search. Rooted +in the moment, rooted in the being, you are blissful. And this bliss is not something +which is happening really to you — you are it. + +I AM EXISTING. Try it. And you can do it anywhere. Just riding in a bus, or travelling +in a train, or just sitting, or lying down on your bed, try to feel existence as it is; don't +think about it. Suddenly you will become aware that you have not known many things +which are continuously happening to you. You have not felt your body. You have your +hands, but you have not ever felt it — what it says, and what it continuously goes on +informing you; how it feels. + +Sometimes it is heavy and sad, sometimes it is happy and light. Sometimes everything +flows in it, sometimes everything is dead. Sometimes you feel it alive, dancing, +sometimes as if there is no life in it — frozen, dead; hanging on you, but not alive. + +When you start feeling your being, you will come to know the moods of your hands, of +your eyes, of your nose, of your body. It is a big phenomenon; there are subtle nuances. +The body goes on telling you and you are not there to hear it. And existence all around +you goes on penetrating you in subtle ways, in many ways, in different ways, but you are +not aware. You are not there to receive it, to welcome it. + +When you start feeling existence, the whole world becomes alive to you in a totally new +way; you have not known it. + +Then you pass through the same street and the street is not the same, because now you +are grounded in existence. You meet the same friends but they are not the same, because +you are different. You come back to your house and the wife you have lived with for +years is not the same. + +Now you are aware of your own being, you become aware of the other's being. When the +wife becomes angry, you can enjoy even her anger, because now you can feel what is +happening. And if you can feel it, anger my not look like anger; it may become love. If +you can feel it deep down, then anger shows that she still loves you. Otherwise she would +not be angry; she would not bother. She still waits for you the whole day. She is angry +because she loves you. She is not indifferent. + +Remember, anger or hate or not the real opposites of love — indifference is the real +opposite. When someone is indifferent to you, love is lost. If someone is not even ready +to be angry with you, then everything is lost. But ordinarily if your wife is angry you +react more violently, you become aggressive. You cannot understand the symbolic +meaning of it. You are not grounded in yourself. You have not really known your own +anger; that's why you cannot understand others' anger. + +If you know your own anger, if you can feel it in its total mood, then you know others’ +anger also. You are angry only when you love someone, otherwise there is no need. + +Through anger the wife is saying that she still loves you, she is not indifferent to you. She +has been waiting, waiting, and now the whole waiting has become anger. + +She may not say it directly, because the language of feeling is not direct. And that has + + + +become a big problem today — because you cannot understand the language of feeling, +because you don’t know your own feelings. You are not grounded in your own being. + +You can understand only words, you cannot understand feelings. Feelings have their own +way of expression, and they are more basic, more real. + +Once you get acquainted with your own existence, you will become aware of others' +existence also. And everyone is so mysterious, and everyone is such a deep abyss to be +known — an infinite possibility of being penetrated and known. And everyone is waiting +that someone should penetrate, go deep, and feel his or her heart. But because you have +not known your own heart, you cannot know anyone else's. The nearest heart remains +unknown, so how can you know others; hearts? + +You move as a zombie, and you move in a crowd of zombies; everyone is fast asleep. + +You have only this much alertness: that you pass through fast-asleep people and without +any accident you come to your home, that's all. This much alertness you have got. This is +the minimum which is possible to man, that's why you are so bored, so dull. + +Life is just a long heaviness, and deep down everyone is waiting for death, in order to be +delivered from life. Death seems to be the only hope. + +Why is this happening? Life can be infinite bliss. Why is this so boring? You are not +grounded in it. You are uprooted; uprooted, and living at the minimum. And life really +happens when you live at the maximum. + +This sutra will give you a maximum of existence. Thought can give you only a minimum; +feeling can give you the maximum. Through mind there is no way to existence; through +heart is the only way. + +I AM EXISTING. Feel it through the heart. And feel THIS EXISTENCE IS MINE. THIS +IS MINE. THIS IS THIS. This is very beautiful I AM EXISTING. Feel it, be grounded in +it; then know THIS IS MINE — this existence, this overflowing being is mine. + +You go on saying that this house is mine, this furniture is mine. You go on talking about +your possessions, and you never know what you really possess. You possess total being. +You possess the deepest possibility, the center-most core of existence in you. Shiva says: + +I AM EXISTING. Feel this. THIS IS MINE. + +This too is not to be made a thought; remember that continuously. Feel it — this is mine, +this existence — and then you will feel gratitude. How can you thank God? Your +thankfulness is superficial, formal. And look what a misery... even with God we are +formal. + +How can you be grateful? You have not known anything to be grateful for. + +If you can feel yourself rooted in existence, merged in it, overflowing with it, and allow +even dancing with it, then you will feel, 'This is mine. This existence belongs to me. This +whole mysterious universe belongs to me. This whole existence has been existing for me. +It has created me. I am a flower of it.' + +This consciousness that has happened to you is the greatest flower that has happened to +the universe. And for millions and millions of years this earth was preparing for you to +exist. + +THIS IS MINE AND THIS IS THIS. To feel, 'This is what life is, THIS IS THIS - this +suchness. I was unnecessarily worried. I was unnecessarily a beggar, unnecessarily +thinking in tenns of begging. I am the master.’ + +When you are rooted, you are one with the whole, and the existence exists for you. You +are not a beggar; you become an emperor suddenly. THIS IS THIS. + + + +OH BELOVED, + +EVEN IN SUCH KNOW ILLIMITABLY. + +And while feeling this, don't create a limit to it. Feel it illimitably. Don’t create a +boundary to it; there is none. It ends nowhere. The world begins nowhere; the world ends +nowhere. Existence has no beginning and no end. You also don't have any beginning; you +also don’t have any end. + +Beginning and end are because of the mind — mind has a beginning and mind has an end. + +Go backwards, travel backwards into your life: there comes a moment where everything +stops — there is a beginning. You can remember back to when you were three years of +age, or, at the most, two years of age — that is rare — but then memory stops. You can +travel backwards to when you were two years of age. What does it mean? And you +cannot remember anything previous to that, previous to that age of two years. Suddenly +there is a blank, you don’t know anything. + +Do you remember anything about your birth? Do you know anything about the nine +months in your mother's womb? You were, but the mind was not there. Mind started +around the age of two; that's why you can remember back to that age. Then there is no +mind, memory stops. Mind has a beginning, mind has an end, but you are beginningless. +If in deep meditation, in such meditation you can come to feel existence, then there is no +mind — a beginningless, endless flow of energy, of cosmic force; an infinite ocean around +you, and you are just a wave in it. The wave has a beginning and an end — the ocean has +none. And once you kn ow that you are not the wave but the ocean, all misery has +disappeared. + +What is deep down in your misery? — deep down there is death. You are afraid of some +end which is going to be there. It is absolutely certain; nothing is so certain as death — the +fear, the trembling. Whatsoever you do, you are helpless. + +Nothing can be done — death is going to be there. And that goes on and on inside in the +conscious and unconscious mind. Sometimes it erupts in the conscious — you become +afraid of death. You push it down, and then it continues in the unconscious. Every +moment you are afraid of death, of the end. + +Mind is going to die, you are not going to die — but you don't know yourself. You know +something which is just a created thing: it has a beginning, it is going to have an end. + +That which begins must end. If you can find within your being something which never +begins, which simply is, which cannot end, then the fear of death disappears. And when +the fear of death disappears, love flows through you, not before it. + +How can you love when there is going to be death? You can cling to someone, but you +cannot love. You can use someone, but you cannot love. You can exploit someone, but +you cannot love. + +Love is not possible if fear is there. Fear is the poison. Love cannot flower with fear deep +inside. Everyone is going to die. Everyone is standing in a queue waiting for his time. +How can you love? Everything seems nonsense. Love appears nonsense if death is there, +because death will destroy everything. Even love is not eternal. Whatsoever you do for +your beloved, for your lover, you cannot do anything because you cannot avoid death — it +is just waiting behind everything. + + + +You can forget it, you can create a facade, and you can go on believing that it is not +going to be there, but your belief is just superficial — deep down you know it is going to +be there. And if death is there, then life is meaningless. You can create artificial +meanings, but they won’t help much. Temporarily, for some moments, they can help, and +again the reality erupts and the meaning is lost. You can just deceive yourself +continuously, that's all — unless you come to know something which is beginningless and +endless, which is beyond death. + +Once you come to know it, then love is possible, because then there is no death. Love is +possible. Buddha loves you, Jesus loves you, but that love is absolutely unknown to you. +That love has come because fear has disappeared, and your love is just a mechanism to +avoid fear. So whenever you love, you feel fearless. Someone gives you strength. + +And this is a mutual phenomenon: you give strength to someone and someone gives +strength to you. Both are weak, and both are seeking someone, and then two weak +persons meet and they help each other to be strong — this is just wonderful! How does it +happen? It is just a make-believe. You feel that someone is there behind you, with you, +but you know no one can be with you in death. And if someone cannot be with you in +death, how can he or she be with you in life? Then it is just postponing, just avoiding +death. + +And because you are afraid, you need someone to make you fearless. + +It is said, somewhere Emerson has written, that even the greatest warrior is a coward +before his wife. Even a Napoleon is a coward, because the wife knows that he needs her +strength, he needs her in order to be himself. He depends on her. When he comes back +from the war, from the fighting, he is trembling, afraid. He rests in her, he relaxes in her. +She consoles him; he becomes just like a child. Every husband is a child before the wife. +And the wife? — she depends on the husband. She lives through him. She cannot live +without him;he is her life. + +This is a mutual deception. Both are afraid — death is there. They both try to love each +other and forget death. Lovers become, or appear to be, fearless. Lovers even sometimes +can face death very fearlessly, but that is just appearance. + +Our love is part of fear — just to escape from it. Real love happens when there is no fear +— when death has disappeared, when you know you never begin and you are never going +to end. Don't think it. You can think it, because of the fear. You can think, 'Yes, I know I +am not going to end, there is no death, the soul is immortal.’ You can think because of +fear — that will not help. + +If you move deep in meditation it will happen. Fear will disappear, because you know +yourself endlessly. You go on spreading endlessly — back into the past, forward into the +future, and this very moment, this present moment, in the depth of it you are there. + +And because you are afraid, you need someone to make you fearless. + +It is said, somewhere Emerson has written, that even the greatest warrior is a coward +before his wife. Even a Napoleon is a coward, because the wife knows that he needs her +strength, he needs her in order to be himself. He depends on her. When he comes back +from the war, from the fighting, he is trembling, afraid. He rests in her, he relaxes in her. +She consoles him; he becomes just like a child. Every husband is a child before the wife. +And the wife? — she depends on the husband. She lives through him. She cannot live +without him;he is her life. + + + +This is a mutual deception. Both are afraid — death is there. They both try to love each +other and forget death. Lovers become, or appear to be, fearless. Lovers even sometimes +can face death very fearlessly, but that is just appearance. + +Our love is part of fear — just to escape from it. Real love happens when there is no fear +— when death has disappeared, when you know you never begin and you are never going +to end. Don't think it. You can think it, because of the fear. You can think, 'Yes, I know I +am not going to end, there is no death, the soul is immortal.’ You can think because of +fear — that will not help. + +If you move deep in meditation it will happen. Fear will disappear, because you know +yourself endlessly. You go on spreading endlessly — back into the past, forward into the +future, and this very moment, this present moment, in the depth of it you are there. + +You simply are — you never begin, you are never going to end. + +FEEL THIS ILLIMITABLY - infinitely. + +THE END. + + + +Chapter 60: Liberation from yourself + + +Question 1 + +YOU SAY THAT RELIGION IS TOTAL FREEDOM OR MOKSHA, AND YOU +ALSO STRESS THE IMPORTANCE OF SURRENDER IN RELIGION. BUT ARE +NOT FREEDOM AND SURRENDER CONTRADICTORY IN TERMS? + +They appear contradictory but they are not. And they appear so because of the language; +existentially they are not. Try to understand two things. First: you cannot be free +remaining as you are, because as you are is your bondage. Your ego i s the bondage. You +can be free only when this ego point disappears — this ego point is the bondage. + +When there is no ego, you become one with existence, and only that oneness can be +freedom. While you exist separate, this separation is false. Really, you are not separate; +you cannot be. You are part of existence — and not a mechanical part, but an organic part. +You cannot exist for a single moment separated from existence. You breathe it every +moment; it breathes you every moment. You live in a cosmic whole. + +Your ego gives you a false feeling of separate existence. Because of that false feeling, +you start fighting existence. When you fight you are in bondage. When you fight you are +bound to be defeated, because the part cannot win against the whole. And because of this +fight with the whole, you feel in bondage; everywhere limited. Wherever you move, a +wall comes. That wall is nowhere in existence — it moves with your ego, it is part of your +separate feeling. + +Then you struggle against existence. In that struggle you will be defeated constantly; in +that defeat you feel bondage, limitation. + +By surrender it is meant that you surrender the ego, you surrender the separating wall, +you become one. That is reality, so whatsoever you are surrendering is just a dream, a +concept, a false notion. You are not surrendering reality; you are just surrendering a false +attitude. The moment you surrender this false attitude you become one with existence. +Then there is no conflict. + +And if there is no conflict you have no limitation; nowhere there comes a bondage, a +boundary. You are not separate. You cannot be defeated, because there is no one to be +defeated. You cannot die, because there is no one to die. You cannot be in misery, +because there is no one to be in misery. The moment you surrender the ego, the whole +nonsense is surrendered — misery, bondage, dukkha, hell — everything is surrendered. +You become one with existence. This oneness is freedom. + +Separation is bondage. Oneness is freedom Not that you become free, remember this — +you are no more. So it is not that you become free — you are no more. Really, when you +are not, freedom is. How to express it is a problem. When you are not, freedom is. + +Buddha is reported to have said, 'You are not going to be in bliss. When you are not, the +bliss is. You are not going to be liberated. + +You are going to be liberated from yourself.’ + +So freedom is not freedom of the ego. Freedom is freedom from the ego. And if you can +understand this — that freedom is freedom from the ego — then surrender and freedom +become one, then they mean one. But if you take the ego as the standpoint from which to +think, then the ego will say, 'Why surrender? — because if you surrender, then you cannot + + + +be free. Then you become a slave. When you surrender, you become a slave.’ + +But really, you are not surrendering to someone. This is the second point to be +understood: you are not surrendering to someone; you are simply surrendering. There is +no one who will take your surrender. If there is someone and you surrender to him, then it +is a sort of slavery. Really, there is not even a god to whom you are surrendering. And +when we talk about a god, that is just to find you something to help you to surrender. + +In Patanjali's lYoga Sutras', God is talked about just to help you to surrender. There is no +God. Patanjali says there is no God, but it will be difficult for you to surrender to one ; it +will be difficult for you to simply surrender. To help surrender, God is talked about. So +God is just a method. This is rare, very scientific — God is just a method to help you +surrender. There is no one who is going to take your surrender. If there is someone and +you surrender, then it is a slavery, a bondage. + +This is a very subtle and deep point: there is no God as a person; God is just a way, a +method, a technique. + +Patanjali relates many techniques. One of them is ISHWARA PRANIDHAN — the idea +of God. There are many methods to reach the surrender; one method is the idea of God. +That will help your mind to surrender, because if I say, 'Surrender,' you will ask, 'To +whom?’ If I say, 'Simply surrender,’ it will be difficult for you to conceive. Try to +understand in a different way. If I say to you, 'Simply love,’ you will ask, 'Whom? What +do you mean by "simply love"? If there is no one to be loved, how to love?’ If I say, + +'Pray,' then you will ask, 'To whom? Worship to whom?’ Your mind cannot conceive +non-duality. It will ask, it will raise a question, 'To whom?’ + +Just to help your mind, so that the mind's question is satisfied, Patanjali says that God is +just a way, a technique. Worship, love, surrender — to whom? Patanjali says, 'To God.’ +Because if you surrender, then you will come to know that there is no God — or you +yourself are that to which you have surrendered. But this will happen when you have +surrendered. God is just a trick. + +It is said that even to surrender to a god who is nowhere seen, who is invisible, is +difficult, so scriptures say, 'Surrender to the guru, to the master.’ The master is visible +and a person, so then the question becomes relevant — if you surrender to a master then it +is a slavery, because a person is there and you are surrendering to him. + +But then too you will have to understand again a very subtle point — even more subtle +than the notion o God. A master is a master only when he is not. If he is, then he is not a +master. A master becomes a master only when he is not. He has achieved non-being; +there is no one. + +If someone is sitting here in this chair, then there is no master; then it is going to become +a slavery. But if there is no one sitting in this chair, a non-being, one who is not centered +anywhere, one who has surrendered — not to anyone, but simply surrendered and +achieved non-being, has become a non-person — who is simply there, not concentrated in +an ego, diffused, not concentrated anywhere, then he can become a master. So when you +are surrendering to a master, again you are surrendering to nobody. + +This is a deep question for you. When you are surrendering, if you can understand that +this is simply surrendering, not a surrender — surrendering, not a surrender.... A surrender +is to someone. A surrendering is something on your part. So the basic thing is +surrendering — the act, not the object. The object should not be important, but the one +who is surrendering is important. The object is just an excuse — just an excuse. + + + +If you can understand, then there is no need to surrender to anyone — you can simply +surrender. Then there is no need to love someone — you can simply love. + + +You are significant, not the object. If the object is significant, you will create a bondage +out of it. So even a god who is not, will become a bondage; even a master who is not, will +become a bondage. But that bondage is created by you; it is a misunderstanding. +Otherwise surrendering is freedom They are not contradictory. + +Question 2 + +WHILE 'THIS IS THIS’ ALSO INCLUDES THIS IS THAT,’ AND THAT IS +BRAHMA,’ HOW IS IT THAT THE SUTRA EMPHASIZES ONLY THIS IS THIS’? + +For a very particular reason — because tantra, deep down, is interested only in the here +and now. THIS IS THIS means that which is here and now. THAT goes a little further +away. + +Secondly, for tantra there is no division between this and that. Tantra is non-dualistic. +This is the world, and that is Brahma. This is the mundane, the material, and that is +consciousness, the spiritual. For tantra there is no distinction like this. THIS is all — +THAT is included in it. This very world is divine. + +And tantra makes no distinction and no categorization of higher and lower: THIS means +the lower, and THAT means the higher; THIS means that which you can see and touch +and know, and THAT means the invisible that you cannot see and cannot touch, you can +only infer. For tantra there is no distinction of higher and lower, of visible and invisible, +of matter and mind, of life and death, of world and Brahma — no distinction. + + +Tantra says THIS IS THIS, and THAT is included in it. But the emphasis on THIS is +beautiful. It says here and now, whatsoever is, this is all. And everything is in it; nothing +is excluded. The near, the intimate, the ordinary, is all. + +It is a very well known saying of Zen mysticism that if you can become just ordinary, +you have become extraordinary. Only the person who is at ease with his ordinariness is +extraordinary. Because everyone hankers to be extraordinary, so the desire to be +extraordinary is very ordinary. Everyone — you cannot find a person who is not trying to +be extraordinary in some way, so the desire, the lust to be extraordinary, is a part, a basic +part of the ordinary mind. Zen masters say, 'So to be ordinary is the most extraordinary +thing in the world. To be just ordinary. It is rare. Very rarely it happens that someone is +simply ordinary. + +One Japanese emperor was in search of a master, so he went from one teacher to another, +but no one could satisfy him, because one old man had said that the real master would be +most ordinary. He went on searching, but he couldn’t find an ordinary man. He came +back to the old man who was just on his dying bed, and he said, 'You have put me to +great trouble. The way you defined the master — that he will be simple, ordinary — has +become a problem for me. I have been searching all over the country, and no one satisfies +me. + +So give me some clue how to find the master.’ + +The dying man said, 'You have been searching in wrong places. You have been +searching in wrong places! You have been going to persons who are in some way +extraordinary, and then you try to find the ordinary. Move in the ordinary world. And + + + +really you are still trying to find the extraordinary. Now you define him as ordinary, but +you are still searching for the extra-ordinary. Now the definition has changed. Now you +define him as the most ordinary, but the rare, the exceptional. You are still in this search. +Don’t do that, and the moment you are ready and not searching in this way, the master +will come to you. + +The next morning while he was sitting, he tried to understand what the old man had said, +and he felt that he was right. The desire left him. A beggar appeared — and he was the +master. And he had known that beggar his whole life. He was always coming, that beggar +was coming daily to the palace, so the emperor asked the beggar, 'How did it happen that +I couldn’t recognize you before?’ + +The beggar said, 'Because you were searching for the extra-ordinary. I was here, but you +were searching THERE. You missed me continuously.’ + +Tantra says THIS not THAT, particularly in this technique. There are techniques in +which THAT is discussed, but THIS is most tantric — this, here and now, the most +intimate. + +Your wife, your husband, THIS, your friend, the beggar, may be the master. But you are +not looking at THIS; you are looking at THAT, there, somewhere in the clouds. You +cannot even conceive that near you can be that quality of being. You cannot conceive; +because you think you already know the near, so you search for it far away. You already +feel that you know THIS, so now the only thing to be found is THAT. + +This is not true. You don’t know THIS, you don’t know the near. The near is as unknown +as the far away. Have a look around you. You are not acquainted with anybody. You +don’t have any knowledge of anybody. Do you know the tree you pass every day? Do you +know your friend with whom you have lived your whole life? Or do you know yourself, +who is the nearest? Do you know your body, the breath that comes and goes +continuously? Do you know it? Nothing is known. Even THIS is not known, so why +hanker after THAT? + +This technique says, if THIS is known, THAT will be known automatically, because +THAT is implied in THIS. The far away is hidden in the near, in the intimate. But the +human mind hankers for the far away. This is an escape. It is an escape to think of the far +away, because then you can go on thinking forever, and you can go on postponing the +living, because life is THIS. If you think about it and if you contemplate about it, you +will have to change yourself. + + +I am reminded of one anecdote. Once it happened, a Zen master was appointed as a +preacher in a temple. No one knew that he was a Zen master. The congregation gathered +and the first sermon was delivered. Everyone was thrilled; it was just beautiful. No one +had heard such a thing before. The next day an even greater crowd came to the temple, +but the master repeated the same sermon. So they got bored — 'What type of man is he?’ +Then on the third day they came again, not in so great a number, but the master repeated +the same sermon again. So many left just in the middle; only very few were left, and +those few were there only to ask. 'Have you got only one sermon? And are you going to +deliver it every day?’ One spokesman blurted out and asked the priest, 'What type of +preaching is this? Thrice we have heard you, and you go on repeating exactly the same +thing, in exactly the same words. Don’t you have any other lectures, any other sermons?’ +The priest said, 'I have quite a few, but you have not done anything about the first one. + + + +Unless you do something about the first one, I am not going to deliver the second. It is +unnecessary.’ + +The crowd stopped coming. No one would come near the temple, because the moment +anyone would come, the Zen priest would start the first sennon. It is said that people +stopped passing that way, that temple — ' That priest is there, and if you happen to be +there he will give you the same sermon again.’ + + +He must have been a very deep knower of the human mind. The human mind wants to +think but never wants to do anything — action is dangerous. Thinking is good, because +you go on being the same. If you think about the far away, the distant, there is no need to +change yourself. The Brahma, the absolute, cannot change you, but the neighbor, the +friend, the wife, the husband — if you look at them, you will have to change yourself. + +And it is a trick not to look at them. + +You look at the THAT to forget the THIS — and THIS is the life, and THAT is simply a +dream. You can think about God, because that thinking is impotent; it is not going to do +anything. You will continue thinking about God and you will remain the same. This is a +trick to remain the same. If you think about your wife, if you think about your child, if +you penetrate deep in the intimate near, you cannot remain the same — action will come +out of it. + +Tantra says, 'Don’t go far away. He is here, this very moment, just near you. Be open, +and look at the THIS, and the THAT will take care of itself.’ + +Question 3 + +YOU HAVE SAID THAT TANTRA TEACHES MAN TO TRANSCEND BOTH HIS +CRAVING FOR HIS ANIMALISTIC PAST, AND ALSO HIS CRAVING FOR THE +DIVINE. DOES IT MEAN THAT DIVINITY IS PART OF THE WORLD, AND THAT +TOO HAS TO BE TRANSCENDED? AND WHAT IS IT THAT GOES BEYOND +BOTH? + +You will have to understand many things. + +First: the nature of desire. Divinity is not what you call it. The god that you talk about is +not the god of reality; it is the god of your desire. So it is not a question of whether the +divine is part of the world. That is not the question. The real question is, can you desire +the divine without making him part of the world? + +Look at it in this way. It has been said again and again that unless you leave desiring, you +cannot attain to him, the ultimate. You cannot attain to the divine if you don’t leave +desiring. Leave desiring and you can attain to him. You have heard it many times, but I +wonder whether you understand it or not. More or less, you will be misunderstanding it. +Hearing this, you start desiring the divine — and that is to miss the whole point. + +If you leave desiring, the divine will happen to you. Then you start desiring the divine, so +your divine will be part of the world. That which can be desired is the world. This is how +I define it: that which can be desired is the world. So the divine cannot be desired, and if +you desire it, it has become part of the world. + +When desiring stops, the divine happens. When you are not desiring anything, the divine +is there — then the whole world is divine. You will not find the divine somewhere in +contradiction, in opposition to the world — contrary to the world. When you are not +desiring, everything is divine; when you are desiring, everything is the world. + + + +Your desiring creates the world: whatsoever you desire becomes the world. This is not +the world that you see — the trees, and the sky, and the sea, and the rivers, and the earth, +and the stars. This is not the world — that which you desire is the world. + +A flower is there in the garden. The moment you pass the tree, and you look at the +flower, and the smell of the flower comes to you, look within. If you are not desiring that +flower, if there is not even a slight urge to possess it, not even a slight ripple of desire to +have it, that flower becomes divine. You will have the divine face through it. But if the +desire is there to possess it, or a jealousy arises about the owner of the tree, you have +created a world; the divine has disappeared. It is your desire that changes the quality of +existence; your desire makes it the world. When you are non-desiring, the whole world +becomes divine. + +Now I will read this question again. YOU HAVE SAID THAT TANTRA TEACHES +MAN TO TRANSCEND BOTH HIS CRAVING FOR HIS ANIMALISTIC PAST, AND +ALSO HIS CRAVING FOR THE DIVINE. + +Tantra teaches only to transcend craving. It is irrelevant what you crave — that you crave +is the point. You can go on changing the objects. You crave money, you crave power, +you crave prestige — you crave for the world. Then you change. You get fed up with it, +you are bored. Or, you have attained whatsoever you craved, and now you are not +fulfilled; you feel frustrated. + +You start a new craving. + +Now you crave the divine. You crave moksha, nirvana, liberation — now you crave for +the god. The object has changed; you have not changed — your craving remains the same. +It was running after prestige and power and money. Now it is running after divine power. +It is running after the ultimate, moksha, the absolute freedom, but the craving is there. +Ordinarily, religious people go on changing their objects of desire. Desire remains the +same, unchanged. And it is not the objects which create the problem; it is the desire, the +craving, which creates the problem. Tantra says it is futile to go on changing objects. It is +wasting time and life and energy. Changing objects won’t help — drop craving. Don’t +crave. Don’t crave for freedom, because craving is bondage. Don’t crave for the divine, +because craving is the world. Don’t crave for the inner, because craving is the outer. So it +is not a question of transcending this craving or that — simply drop craving. Don’t crave, +don’t desire. Just be yourself. + +When you don't desire, what happens? When you don't crave, what happens? You are +non-moving; all movement ceases. You are not in a hurry to reach anywhere. You are not +serious. There is no hope and there is no frustration. You don’t expect anything; nothing +can frustrate you. There is no desire; you cannot be a failure. Of course, there is not going +to be any success either. + + +When you are not craving, not desiring, what happen? You are simply left alone, moving +nowhere. There is no goal, because craving creates the goal. There is no future, because +craving creates the future. There is no time, because craving needs time to move. Time +stops. Future drops. And when there is no craving, mind drops, because mind is nothing +but craving, and because of that craving you have to plan and think and dream and +project. + +When there is no craving, everything drops. You are simply in your purity. You exist +without moving anywhere; inside, all ripples disappear. The ocean remains, but the + + + +waves are not there. This is what divineness is for tantra. + +So look at it in this way: craving is the barrier. Don’t think of the object, otherwise you +will be deceived by yourself. You will change one object for another, and then time will +be wasted. Again you will get frustrated, and then you will again change the object. You +can go on changing objects infinitely, unless you realize that it is not the object which +creates the problem, it is your craving. But craving is subtle and the object is gross. The +object can be seen, and craving can be seen only when you go deep down and meditate +upon it; otherwise, craving is not seen. + +You can marry a woman or a man with great dreams and hope, and the greater the +dreams, the greater the hope, the greater will be the frustration. + +An ordinary arranged marriage cannot be such a failure as a love-marriage is bound to be, +because with an ordinary arranged marriage there is not much hope, there is not much +dreaming. It is business-like; there is no romance, no poetry. There is no peak to it; you +are travelling on plain ground. So arranged marriages never fail. They cannot fail, +because there is no point. How can you fail in an arranged marriage? You were never on +a height, so you cannot fall. Love-marriages fail. Only love-marriages can fail, because +with a great poetry, with a great dreaming force, they come up. They touch heights, on +the waves you rise high, and then you will have to fall down. + +So old countries, those who have knowledge, experience, they have come to settle for +arranged marriages. They don't talk about love-marriages. In India they never talk about +love-marriages. They have also tried in the past, and then they felt that a love-marriage is +going to be a failure. Because you expect too much, you will be frustrated, and the +proportion of frustration will be the same. Whatsoever you desire and dream gives you +expectations — they cannot be fulfilled. + +You marry a woman; if it is a love-marriage, you expect much. Then you get frustrated. +The moment you get frustrated, immediately you start thinking about another woman. So +if you say to your wife, 'I am not interested in any other woman,’ and she feels you have +become indifferent to her, you cannot convince her — it is impossible, it is unnatural. + +The moment you become indifferent to your wife, the wife knows instinctively that you +have become interested in someone else. + +This is how mind functions. You become aware of the woman that you have married, and +you feel the frustration is coming because of her — 'This was not a right choice.’ This is +ordinary logic. 'This was not a right choice. This woman is not for me. I have chosen a +wrong partner, so the conflict has arisen.’ Now you will try to find another partner. + +You can go on that way ad infinitum. You may marry all the women on the earth, and +still you will be thinking in the same way — that 'This woman is not right for me’. And +the subtle craving which is creating all trouble is not seen. It is subtle. The woman is +seen; the craving is not seen. It is not the woman or the man who is frustrating you; it is +your craving, your desire, which is frustrating you. + +If you can come to understand this, you have become wise. If you go on changing +objects, you are ignorant. If you can come to feel yourself and the craving which is +creating the whole thing, you have become wise. Then you don’t go on changing one +object for another; you simply drop the very effort to possess, to desire, to crave. + +The moment this craving is not there, the whole world becomes divine. It has always +been so, only your eyes were not open to see. Your eyes were filled with craving. + + + +Eyes filled with craving, the divine appears as the world. Open eyes, unfilled, unclouded +by craving, the world appears as the divine. + +The world and the divine are not two things, not two existences, but two ways of looking +at the same thing, two approaches to the same thing, two outlooks, two types of +perception. One perception clouded with craving, another perception unclouded with +craving. If you can look unclouded, and your eyes are not filled with tears of frustration +and dreams of hope, there is nothing like the world; only the divine exists — existence is +divine. This is what tantra means. And when tantra says transcend both, tantra is not +concerned with either this or that — tantra is concerned only with transcendence, so there +is no craving. + +AND WHAT IS IT THAT GOES BEYOND BOTH? That cannot be said, because the +moment anything is said about it, it comes within the two. Whatsoever can be said about +God will be false, just because it is said. + +Language is dualistic. There is no non-dual language; cannot be. Language is meaningful +only because of dualism. I say Tight'; immediately in your mind bubbles up the word +'darkness' or 'black'. I say 'day', and immediately in your mind comes 'night'. I say +love', and just behind it is hidden 'hate'. If I say light and there is no darkness, how will +you define it? + +We can only define words because of their opposite terms. + +I say light, and if you ask me what light is, I say that which is not darkness. If someone +asks you what mind is, you say that which is not body. If someone asks what body is, you +have to say that which is not mind. All terms are circular, so, basically meaningless, +because neither you know anything about the mind, nor do you know anything about the +body. When I ask about the mind, you define it with the body, and the body is undefined. +When I ask you about the body, you define it with the mind, which is itself undefined. +This is good as a game. Language is good as a game — language is a game. But we never +feel that the whole thing is absurd, circular; and nothing is defined, so how can you +define anything? When I ask about the mind, you bring in the body — and the body is +undefined. With an indefined term, you define mind. And then when I ask, 'What do you +mean by body?’ you have to define it with the mind. This is absurd — but there is no other +way. + +Language exists through the opposite, so language is dualistic. It cannot be otherwise. So +nothing can be said about the non-dual experience. Whatsoever is said will be wrong. It +can be indicated, symbols can be used for it, but silence is the best. That which can be +said about it is silence. Everything else can be defined, talked about — not the ultimate. +You can know it, taste it, you can be it, but nothing can be said about it. + +Only negatively we can say something, but only negatively. We cannot say what that is; +we can only say what that is not. + +The whole mystic tradition is simply using negative terms for it. If you ask what that +ultimate is, they will say, 'That ultimate is not this, not that. It is neither life nor death. It +is neither light nor darkness. It is neither near nor far. It is neither I nor you.’ They will +say in this way, but this makes no sense. + +Drop craving and you come to know it face to face. And the experience is so deep and +individual, non-verbal, non-linguistic, that even when you come to know it, you cannot +say anything about it. You will become silent. Or, at the most, you can say this that I am +saying. You can say, 'Nothing can be said about it.’ + + + +Then what is the point of talking so much? Then why do I go on saying something to you +if nothing can be said? Just to bring you to that point where nothing can be said. Just to +push you to that abyss where you can take a jump out of language. Up to that point, +language can be helpful. Up to the point when you take the jump, language can be +helpful, but the moment you have taken the jump, it is silence, it is beyond language. + +So I can push you to the very end of the world through language — to the very end of the +world — but not a single inch into the divine through language. But this pushing you up to +the very end will be helpful, because then you can see with your own eyes that there is +this blissful abyss beyond. + +And then that beyond will call you by itself; then the beyond will attract you; then the +beyond will become a magnet, a pull. It is impossible then for you to come back, to +retreat. The abyss is so enchanting — the abyss of silence — that before you know, you +will have taken a jump. + +That's why I go on talking, knowing well that all that I am saying will not help you to +know it. But it will help you to take a jump. It is methodological. It will look +contradictory, paradoxical, if I say that all language that I am using, or that the mystics +have ever used, is to bring you to the temple of silence; to force you into silence, to call +you unto silence. It looks paradoxical. Then why use language? I can use silence also, but +then you will not understand. + +When I have to talk to madmen. I have to use a mad language. It is because of you I am +using language. It is not that anything can be expressed by it; only your inner chattering +can be destroyed by it. It is just as if you have a thorn in your foot — another thorn can +pull it out. The other one is also a thorn. Your mind is filled with words, with thorns. +What I am trying to do is to pull those words out of you. What I am using are also words. +You are filled with poison. What I am giving you is again a dose of poison, just an +antidote. It is also a poison. But a thorn can pull out another thorn — then they both can +be thrown. + + +When I have talked to you to the point where you are ready to be silent, throw all that I +have said to you; it is useless, it is even dangerous to carry it. When you have come to +realize that language is useless, dangerous, that inner verbalization is the only barrier, +and when you are ready to be silent, then remember well — don't carry whatsoever I have +said to you. Because the truth cannot be said, and all that can be said cannot be true. Be +unburdened of it. + +The last thing Zarathustra said to his disciples is very beautiful. He had taught them. He +had given them glimpses. He had stirred their souls. He had challenged them to the +ultimate adventure. The last thing he said to them was, 'Now I am leaving you. Now +beware of Zarathustra.’ + +So they asked, 'What are you saying? Beware of Zarathustra? You are our teacher, our +master, our only hope.’ + +And Zarathustra said, 'All that I have said to you, now beware of it. Don’t cling to me, +otherwise I will become a bondage to you.’ + +When one thorn has pulled out your thorn, throw the other one also with it. When I have +prepared you to move into silence, then beware of me. Then whatsoever I have said has +to be thrown; it is rubbish, of no use. It has utility only up to the point before you are +ready to take a jump into silence. Nothing can be said about that which transcends both. + + + +Only this much can be said — and this is too much really. + + +If you can understand, this is enough to indicate towards it. + +I am saying this — that if your mind becomes totally vacant of words, you will know it. +When you are not burdened with thoughts, you will realize it, because it is already there. +It is not something which is going to happen; it has already happened within you. You +are just an expression of it. But you are so much engrossed, involved, with thoughts, with +clouds, that you miss the key. You are too concentrated on the clouds; you have forgotten +the sky. Allow the clouds to disperse, and the sky has always been there just waiting for +you. The beyond is waiting for you. Just drop the duality and it is there. + +Question 4 + +YOU HAVE SAID THAT ONE WHO IS IN FEAR CANNOT LOVE, NOR CAN HE +REACH GODHOOD. BUT HOW IS ONE TO GET RID OF HIS FEAR ACCORDING +TO TANTRA? + +Why do you want to get rid of fear? Or have you become afraid of fear? If you have +become afraid of fear, this is a new fear. This is how mind goes on creating the same +pattern again and again. I say, 'Don't desire and then you will reach the divine.' So you +ask, 'Really, if we don’t desire, then will we reach the divine?’ You have started desiring +the divine. + +I say to you, 'If there is fear, love cannot be,’ so you become afraid of fear. You ask, + +'How can one get rid of fear?’ This is again a fear, and more dangerous than the first one, +because the first one was natural; the second one is unnatural. + +And it is so subtle that you are not aware of what you are asking — how to get rid of fear? +The question is not of getting rid of anything; the question is only of understanding. +Understand fear, what it is, and don’t try to get rid of it, because the moment you start +trying to get rid of anything, you are not ready to understand it — because the mind which +thinks to get rid of is already closed. It is not open to understand, it is not sympathetic. It +cannot contemplate quietly; it has already decided. Now the fear has become the evil, the +sin, so get rid of it. Don’t try to get rid of anything. + +Try to understand what fear is. And if you have fear, then accept it. It is there. Don’t try +to hide it. Don’t try to create the opposite. If you have fear, then you have fear. Accept it +as part of your being. If you can accept it, it has disappeared already. Through +acceptance, fear disappears; through denial, fear increases. + +You come to a point where you know that you are afraid, and you come to understand, +'Because of this fear, love cannot happen to me. So, okay, what can I do? The fear is +there, so only one thing will happen — I will not pretend love. Or, I will say to my +beloved or my lover that it is because of fear that I am clinging to you. Deep down I am +afraid. I will become frank about it; I will not deceive anyone, nor myself. I will not +pretend that this is love. + +I will say this is simply fear. Because of fear, I cling to you. Because of fear, I go to the +temple, or to the church, and pray. Because of fear, I remember God. But then I know +that this is not prayer, this is not love, this is only fear. I am fear, so whatsoever I do, it is +there. I will accept this truth.’ + +A miracle happens when you accept a truth. The very acceptance changes you. When you +know that there is fear in your being and you cannot do anything about it, what can you + + + +do? All that you can do is pretend, and pretensions can go to the very extreme, to the +other extreme. + +A very fearful man can become a very brave man. He can create an armour around him. +He can become a dare-devil, just to show that he is not afraid; just to show others that he +is not afraid. And if he can go into danger, he can deceive himself that he is not afraid. +But even the bravest man is afraid. His whole bravery is just around him; deep down he +trembles. Not to be aware of it, he takes a jump into danger. He becomes engaged with +the danger so that he is not aware of the fear, but the fear is there. + +You can create the opposite, but this is not going to change anything. You can pretend +that you are not afraid — that makes no change again. The only transformation that can +happen is that you become simply aware that ' I am fear. My whole being is trembling, +and whatsoever I do is because of the fear.’ + +You have become true to yourself. + +Then you are not afraid of fear. It is there, a part of you; nothing can be done about it. +You have accepted it. Now you don't pretend, now you don’t deceive anyone, nor +yourself. The truth is there, and you are not afraid of it. The fear starts disappearing, +because a person who is not afraid to accept his fear has become fearless — that is the +deepest fearlessness that is possible. He has not created the opposite, so there is no +duality in him. He has accepted the fact. He has become humble before it. He doesn't +know what to do — no one knows — and nothing can be done, but he has stopped +pretending; he has stopped using masks, faces. He has become authentic in his fear. + +This authenticity, and this fearlessness to accept the truth, changes you. And when you +don’t pretend, don't create a false love, don't create a deception around you, don't become +a pseudo-person, you have become authentic. In this authenticity, love arises; fear +disappears, love arises. This is the inner alchemy of how love arises. + +Now you can love. Now you can have compassion, sympathy. Now you don't depend on +anyone, because there is no need. You have accepted the truth. There is no need to +depend on anyone; there is no need to possess and be possessed. There is no hankering +for the other. You accept yourself — through this acceptance, love arises. + +It fills your being. You are not afraid of fear, you are not trying to get rid of it. Simply it +disappears when accepted. + +Accept your authentic being and you will be transformed. Remember: acceptability, total +acceptability, is the most secret key of tantra. Don’t reject anything. Through rejection +you will be crippled. Accept everything — whatsoever it is. Don’t condemn it, and don’t +try to get rid of it. + +There are many things implied in it. If you try to get rid of it, you will have to cut your +being into departments, fragments, parts. You will be crippled. When you throw one +thing, something else is also thrown with it — the other part of it — and you become +crippled. Then you are not total. And you cannot be happy unless you are total and +whole. To be whole is to be holy. To be in fragments is to be ill and diseased. + +So I will say, try to understand fear. Existence has given it to you. It must have some +deep meaning, and it must have some hidden treasure, so don’t throw it. Nothing is given +without any meaning. Nothing exists within you which cannot be used in a higher +symphony, in a higher synthesis. + +All that exists in you, whether you understand it or not, can become a step. Don’t think of +it as a hindrance; allow it to become a step. You can take it that it is hindering the path — + + + +it is not hindering. If you can ride above it, if you can use it, stand on it, a new view of +the path will be revealed to you on a higher level. + + +You will be able to look deep into the possibility, into the future, into the potentiality. +Fear is there for certain purposes. Try to understand this. One: if there is no fear, you will +become too egoistic, and there will be no going back. If there is no fear, as you are, you +will never try to merge into existence, into the cosmos. Really, if there is no fear you will +not be able to survive at all. So it is doing something for you. Whatsoever you are, it is +playing a role in it. + +But if you try to hide it, destroy it, create the opposite of it, you will be divided and you +will become fragmentary, disintegrated. Accept it and use it. And the moment you know +that you have accepted it, it disappears. Just try to think: if you accept your fear, where is +it? + +One man came to me and he said, 'I am very much afraid of death.’ He had cancer, and +death was very near; any day it could happen. And he could not postpone it. He knew it +was going to happen. Within months it would be there, or even within weeks. + +He was really physically, literally, trembling, and he said, 'Just give me one thing: how +can I get rid of this fear of death? Give me some mantra, or something which can protect +me and give me courage to face death. I don’t want to die trembling in fear.’ The man +said, 'I have been to many saints. Many things they have given. They were very kind. +Someone has given me a mantra, someone has given me some sacred ashes, someone has +given me his picture, someone has given something else, but nothing helps. + +Everything is in vain. Now I have come to you as the last resort. Now I will not go to +anyone any more. Give me something.’ + +So I told him, 'Still you are not aware. Why are you asking for something? — just to get +rid of fear? Nothing will help. I cannot give you anything, otherwise, as others have +proved failures, I will also prove a failure. And they gave you something because they +don’t know what they are doing. I can say only one thing to you. Accept it. Tremble if +trembling is there — what to do? Death is there, and you feel a trembling, so tremble. +Don’t reject it, don’t suppress it. Don’t try to be brave. There is no need. Death is there. It +is natural. Be afraid totally.’ + +He said, 'What are you saying? You have not given me anything. Rather, on the contrary, +you say to accept.’ + +I said, 'Yes, you accept. You just go and die peacefully with total acceptance.’ + +After three or four days he came again, and said, 'It works. I couldn’t sleep for so many +days, but for these four days I slept deeply, because it is right, you are right.’ He said to +me, 'You are right. Fear is there, death is there, nothing can be done. All the mantras are +just hocus-pocus; nothing can be done.’ + +No doctor can help, no saint can help. Death is there, a fact, and you are trembling. It is +just natural. A stonn comes and the whole tree trembles. It never goes to any saint to ask +how not to tremble when a storm is passing by. + +It never goes for a mantra to change it, to protect it. It trembles. It is natural; it is so. + +And the man said, 'But a miracle has happened. Now I am not so afraid.’ If you accept, +fear starts disappearing. If you reject, resist, fight, you give energy to fear. That man died +peacefully, unafraid, fearless, because he could accept fear. Accept fear and it disappears. +Question 5 + + + +BY THE USE OF TECHNIQUES SIMILAR TO THE SECOND TECHNIQUE YOU +DISCUSSED YESTERDAY, I HEAR SOME SOUNDS LIKE THE FLOWING OF A +RIVER OR A STREAM. MAY I KNOW WHAT THAT SOUND IS? IF I HAVE +UNDERSTOOD RIGHTLY, THERE SHOULD BE NO THOUGHTS OR SOUND, +AND THERE SHOULD BE COMPLETE SILENCE. THEN WHAT IS THIS SOUND? + +In the beginning, before silence happens to you, sound will happen. So this is a good +sign. Words, language, verbalization, disappear; the second layer is of sound. But don't +fight with it; enjoy it. It will become musical, beautiful, You will be filled by its music, +and you will become more alive through it. + +When mind disappears, a natural inner sound appears. Allow it to happen. Meditate on it, +Don’t fight with it; just be a witness to it — it will deepen. And if you don’t fight with it, +and don’t create any struggle, it will disappear by itself, and when it disappears, you will +fall into silence. Words — sound — silence. Words are human, sounds are natural, silence +is cosmic. + + +So this is a good sign. This is what is called nada, the inner sound. Hear it, enjoy it, be a +witness to it. It will disappear. And don’t be disturbed and feel that it should not be there. +If you say it should not be there, or if you hurry to get rid of it in any way, you will come +to the first layer again — to the words. Remember this. If you fight with this second layer +of sound, you have started thinking about it and words have entered. If you say anything +about this sound, you have lost the second deeper layer, and you are thrown back again to +the first. You have come to the mind. + +Don’t say anything, don’t think about it. Don’t even say that this is sound. Just listen to it. +Don’t create any word around it. Don’t give it any name or form. Let is be as it is. Allow +it to flow, and you be a witness. The stream flows, and you are sitting on the bank, just a +witness — not even knowing the name of the stream, not knowing where it is going, not +knowing from where it is coming. + +Just sit near by the sound, and sooner or later it will disappear, and when it disappears +there will be silence. This is a good sign — you have touched a second layer — but if you +try to think about it, you will lose it; you will be thrown back to the first. If you don’t +think about it and can enjoy in witnessing, you will go deeper to the third layer. + + +THE END. + + + +Chapter 61: Techniques to become one with the whole + + +EACH THING IS PERCEIVED THROUGH KNOWING. + +THE SELF SHINES IN SPACE THROUGH KNOWING. + +PERCEIVE ONE BEING AS KNOWER AND KNOWN. + +BELOVED, + +AT THIS MOMENT + +LET, MIND, KNOWING, BREATH, FORM, + +BE INCLUDED. + +I have heard one anecdote. In a conservative party rally, Lord Mancroft was invited to +speak. He came right on time, reached the rostrum and said to the public — he was +looking a little flustered — he said, 'Forgive me for shortening my speech a little, but the +fact is that my house is on fire.’ + +And that fact is everybody's fact. Your house is also on fire, but you don’t even seem a +little flustered. + +Everybody's house is on fire, but you are not aware — not aware of death, not aware that +your life is just passing through your hands. Every moment you are dying, every moment +you are losing an opportunity which cannot be regained. The time that is lost, is lost: +nothing can be done to regain it, and your life becomes shorter and shorter every +moment. + +This is what I mean when I say that your house is also on fire. But you don’t seem even a +little flustered. You don’t even seem to be worried about it. You are not aware of the fact +that the house is on fire. The fact is there, but your attention is not there. And everybody +thinks that there is enough time to do something. There is not enough time, because +whatsoever has to be done is so much that the time is never enough. + + +Once it happened that the Devil was waiting for years and years and nobody was coming +to hell. He was waiting to welcome people, but the earth was running so well and people +were so good that no one was coming to hell. Of course he became very worried. He +called an emergency council. His greatest disciples gathered together to discuss the +situation. Hell was passing through a great crisis and this could not be tolerated. +Something had to be done. So he asked for advice: 'What should we do?’ + +One disciple suggested, 'I would go to the earth and I would talk to people and try to +convince them that there is no God and religions are false, and whatsoever the Bible, the +Koran and the Vedas say is nonsense.’ + +The Devil said, 'This won’t do, because we have been doing this since the very beginning +and it has not influenced people very much. Through such teaching you can convince +only those who are already convinced. So it is of no use; it is not of much use.’ + +Then the second disciple, subtler than the first, said, 'I will go and teach people and try to +convince people that whatsoever the Bible, the Koran and the Vedas say is right. There is +heaven, there is God, but there is no Devil and no hell, so don’t be afraid. And if we can +make them less afraid, they will not bother about religion at all, because all religion is +based on fear.’ + + + +The Devil said, 'Your proposal is a little better. + + +You may be able to, you may succeed in convincing a minority, but the majority will not +listen to you. They are not as much afraid of hell as they are greedy of heaven. Even if +you convince them that there is no hell, they will still want to enter into heaven, and they +will try to be good for that. So this also won’t do much.’ + +Then the third disciple, the subtlest of them all, said, 'I have an idea. Give me a chance to +try it. I will go and say that whatsoever religion says is absolutely true — there is God and +there is Devil and there is heaven and there is hell — but there is no hurry.’ + +And the Devil said, 'Right? You have the right system. You go!’ + +And it is said that since then there has never been a crisis in hell. Rather, they are worried +about the over-population. + +This is how our minds are functioning: we always think there is no hurry. These +techniques we are talking about will be of no use if your mind thinks there is no hurry. +Then you can go on postponing and death will come first. That day will not come when +you think there is a hurry, when you think that now the moment has come. You can go on +postponing. This is what we have been doing with our lives. + +You have to be decisive to do something. You are in a crisis — the house is on fire. Life is +always on fire because death is always there hidden behind it; any moment and you may +not be any more. + +And you cannot argue with death. You cannot do anything. When death happens, it +happens. Time is very short. Even if you live for seventy years or for a hundred years, it +is very short. What you have to do with yourself to transfonn, to mutate, to become a +new being, is such a great work. Don’t go on postponing. + +Unless you feel it as an emergency, a deep crisis, you will not do anything. Unless +religion becomes a very critical process for you, and you feel that unless something is +done to transform you, your whole life is just wasted.... If you feel this very keenly and +deeply and honestly, only then will these techniques be of any help. Because you can +understand them — understanding is of no use unless you do something about it. Really, +unless you do something about it, you have not understood them, because understanding +must become action. If it is not becoming action then it is only acquaintance, not +understanding. + +Try to understand this distinction. Acquaintance is not understanding. Acquaintance will +not force you to actions. It will not force you to any change. It will not force you to do +something about it. You will gather it in the mind; it will become information. You will +become more knowledgeable. But at death everything stops. You go on collecting many +things, never doing anything about them. They become just a burden on you. +Understanding means action. + +When you understand a thing, immediately you start working on it, because if it is right +and you feel it is right, you have to do something about it. Otherwise everything remains +borrowed, and borrowed knowledge cannot become understanding. You can forget that it +is borrowed — you would like to forget that it is borrowed, because to feel that it is +borrowed means that your ego is hurt. So you go on forgetting that it is borrowed. By and +by you start feeling that it is your own. That is very dangerous. + +I have heard an anecdote. The congregation of a church was very bored by the minister. + +A point came when the members of the church said directly to the minister, 'Now you + + + +have to leave.' + +The minister said, 'Give me one more chance, only one chance, and if then you say so, I +will leave.’ + +So next Sunday the whole town gathered in the church to see what that minister was +going to do now that only one chance was given to him. They never suspected, they +never imagined, that such a beautiful sermon was going to be delivered on that day. They +had never heard such a thing. + +Surprised, delighted, they enjoyed it, and when the sennon was finished they gathered +around the minister and they said, 'You need not leave. You remain here. We have never +heard such a thing before — never in our lives. Be here and remain here, and of course, +with an increase in your stipend.’ + + +But then one man, a very prominent member of the congregation, asked, 'Tell me one +thing only. When you started your lecture you raised your left hand with two fingers +raised, and when you closed your lecture you raised your right hand, again with two +fingers raised. So what is the meaning of this symbol?' + +The minister said, 'The meaning is easy. Those fingers are symbolic of quotation marks. +That sermon was not mine — it was borrowed.’ + +Always remember those quotation marks. It is very good to forget them, you feel good, +but all that you know is within quotation marks; it is not your own. And you can drop +those quotation marks only when something has become your own experience. + +These techniques are to change knowledge into experience. These techniques are to +change acquaintance into understanding. That which belongs to a Buddha or to a Krishna +or to a Christ, through these techniques can belong to you — that can become your own. +And unless it becomes your own, no truth is true. It may be a grand lie, a beautiful lie, +but no truth is true unless it becomes your experience — individually, authentically your +own. + +Three things. First: always remember that your house is on fire. Second: don’t listen to +the Devil. He will constantly say to you that there is no hurry. And thirdly: remember, +acquaintance is not understanding. + +Whatsoever I am saying here will make you acquainted. + +It is needed, but it is not enough. It starts you on a journey, but it is not the end. Do +something so that knowledge doesn’t remain knowledge, doesn’t remain as memory, but +becomes your experience and your life. + +Now the first technique: + +EACH THING IS PERCEIVED THROUGH KNOWING. + +THE SELF SHINES IN SPACE THROUGH KNOWING. + +PERCEIVE ONE BEING AS KNOWER AND KNOWN. + +Whenever you know something, it is known through knowing. The object comes to your +mind through the faculty of knowledge. You look at a flower. You know this is a rose +flower. Thew rose flower is there and you are inside. Something from you comes to the +rose flower, something from you is projected on the rose flower. Some energy moves +from you, comes to the rose, takes its form, color and smell, and comes back and informs + + + +you that this is a rose flower. + +All knowledge, whatsoever you know, is revealed through the faculty of knowing. +Knowing is your faculty. Knowledge is gathered through this faculty. But knowing +reveals two things: the known and the knower. Whenever you are knowing a rose flower, +your knowledge is half if you forget the knower who is knowing it. So while knowing a +rose flower there are three things: the rose flower — the known; and the knower — you; +and the relationship between the two — knowledge. + +So knowledge can be divided into three points: knower, known and knowing. + +Knowing is just like a bridge between two points — the subject and the object. Ordinarily +your knowledge reveals only the known; the knower remains unrevealed. Ordinarily your +knowledge is one-arrowed: it points to the rose but it never points to you. Unless it starts +pointing to you, that knowledge will allow you to know about the world, but it will not +allow you to know about yourself. + +All the techniques of meditation are to reveal the knower. George Gurdjieff used a +particular technique just like this. He called it self-remembering. He said that whenever +you are knowing something, always remember the knower. Don’t forget it in the object. +Remember the subject. Just now you are listening to me. When you are listening to me, +you can listen in two ways. One: your mind can be focused towards me — then you forget +the listener. Then the speaker is known but the listener is forgotten. + +Gurdjieff said that while listening, know the speaker and also know the listener. Your +knowledge must be double-arrowed, pointing to two points — the knower and the known. +It must not only flow in one direction towards the object. It must flow simultaneously +towards two directions — the known and the knower. This he called self-remembering. +Looking at a flower, also remember the one who is looking. Difficult, because if you do +try it, if you try to be aware of the knower, you will forget the rose. + +You have become so fixed to one direction that it will take time. If you become aware of +the knower, then the known will be forgotten. If you become aware of the known, then +the knower will be forgotten. + +But a little effort, and by and by you can be aware of both simultaneously. And when you +become capable of being aware of both, this Gurdjieff calls self-remembering. This is one +of the oldest techniques that Buddha used, and Gurdjieff again introduced it to the +western world. + +Buddha called is samyak smriti — right-mindfulness. He said that your mind is not in a +right-mindfulness if it knows only one point. It must know both. And then a miracle +happen: if you are aware of both the known and the knower, suddenly you become the +third — you are neither. Just by endeavoring to be aware of both the known and the +knower, you become the third, you become a witness. A third possibility arises +immediately — a witnessing self comes into being — because how can you know both? If +you are the knower, then you remain fixed to one point. In self-remembering you shift +from the fixed point of the knower. Then the knower is your mind and the known is the +world, and you become a third point, a consciousness, a witnessing self. + +This third point cannot be transcended, and that which cannot be transcended is the +ultimate. That which can be transcended is not worthwhile, because then it is not your +nature — you can transcend it. + + + +I will try to explain it through an example. In the night you sleep and you dream. In the +morning you wake and the dream is lost. While you are awake there is no dream; a +different world comes into your view. You move in the streets, you work in a factory or +in an office. Then you come back to your home, and again you fall asleep at night. Then +this world that you knew while you were awake disappears. Then you don’t remember +who you are. Then you don’t know whether you are black or white, poor or rich, wise or +foolish. You don’t know anything. You don't know if you are young or old. You don't +know if you are man or woman. All that was related with the waking consciousness +disappears; you enter the world of dreams. You forget the waking world; it is no more. In +the morning, again the dreaming world disappears. You come back. + +Which is real? — because while you are dreaming, the real world, the world that you +knew when you were awake, is no more. You cannot compare. And while you are awake, +the dreaming world is no more. You cannot compare. Which is real? Why do you call the +dreaming world unreal? What is the criterion? + +If you say, 'Because it disappears when I am awake,’ this cannot be the criterion, because +your waking world disappears when you are dreaming. And really, if you argue this way, +then the dreaming world may be more real, because while you are awake you can +remember the dream, but while you are dreaming you cannot remember the waking +consciousness and the world around it. + +So which is more real and more deep? The dreaming world completely washes away the +world that you call real. Your real world cannot wash away the dreaming world so +totally; it seems more solid, more real. And what is the criterion? How to say? How to +compare? + +Tantra says that both are unreal. Then what is real? Tantra says that the one who knows +the dreaming world and the one who knows the waking world, he is real — because he is +never transcended. He is never cancelled. Whether you dream or whether you are awake, +he is there, uncanceled. + +Tantra says that the one who knows the dream, and the one who knows that now the +dream has stopped, the one who knows the waking world, and the one who knows that +now the waking world has disappeared, is the real. Because there is no point when it is +not; it is always there. That which cannot be cancelled by any experience is the real. That +which cannot be transcended, beyond which you cannot go, is your self. If you can go +beyond it, then it was not your self. + +This method of Gurdjieffs, which he calls self-remembering, or Buddha’s method, which +he calls right-mindfulness, or this tantra sutra, lead to one thing. They lead within you to +a point which is neither to known nor the knower, but a witnessing self which kn ows +both. + +This witnessing self is the ultimate, you cannot go beyond it, because now whatsoever +you do will be witnessing. + +Beyond witnessing you cannot move. So witnessing is the ultimate substratum, the basic +ground of consciousness. This sutra will reveal it to you. + +EACH THING IS PERCEIVED THROUGH KNOWING. + +THE SELF SHINES IN SPACE THROUGH KNOWING. + +PERCEIVE ONE BEING AS KNOWER AND KNOWN. + + + +If you can perceive in yourself one point which is both knower and known, then you have +transcended object and subject both. Then you have transcended the matter and mind +both; then you have transcended the outer and inner both. Y ou have come to a point +where the knower and the known are one. There is no division. + +With the mind, division will remain. Only with the witnessing self, division disappears. +With the witnessing self you cannot say who is the known and who is the knower — it is +both. But this has to be based on experience, otherwise it becomes a philosophical +discussion. So try it, experiment. + +You are sitting near a rose flower: look at it. The first thing to do is be totally attentive, +give total attention to the rose, so that the whole world disappears and only the rose +remains there — your consciousness is totally attentive to the being of the rose. If the +attention is total then the world disappears, because the more the attention is concentrated +on the rose, the more everything else falls away. The world disappears; only the rose +remains. + +The rose becomes the world. + +This is the first step — to concentrate on the rose. If you cannot concentrate on the rose, it +will be difficult to move to the knower, because then your mind is always diverted. So +concentration becomes the first step towards meditation. Only the rose remains; the +whole world has disappeared. Now you can move inwards; now the rose becomes the +point from where you can move. Now see the rose, and start becoming aware of yourself + +— the knower. + +In the beginning you will miss. When you shift to the knower, the rose will drop out of +consciousness. It will become faint, it will go away, it will become distant. Again you +will come to the rose, and you will forget the self. This hide-and-seek play will go on, but +if you persist, sooner or later a moment will come when suddenly you will be in between. +The knower, the mind, and the rose will be there, and you will be just in the middle, +looking at both. That middle point, that balancing point, is the witness. + +Once you know that, you have become both. Then the rose — the known, and the knower + +— the mind, are just two wings of you. Then the object and the subject are just two wings; +you are the center of both. They are extensions of you. Then the world and the divine are +both extensions of you. You have come to the very center of being. And this center is just +a witness. + +PERCEIVE ONE BEING AS KNOWER AND KNOWN. + + +Start by concentrating on something. When the concentration has come to be total, then +try to move inwards, become mindful of yourself, and then try to balance. It will take +time — months, even years. It depends on how intense is your effort, because it is the +most subtle balancing to come between the two. But it happens, and when it happens you +have reached the center of existence. In that center you are rooted, grounded, silent, +blissful, in ecstasy, and duality is no more. This is what Hindus have called samadhi. + +This is what Jesus called the kingdom of God. + +Just understanding is verbally will not be of much help, but if you try, from the very +beginning you will start to feel that something is happening. When you concentrate on +the rose, the world will disappear. This is a miracle — when the whole world disappears. + + + +Then you come to understand that it is your attention which is basic, and wherever you +move your attention, a world is created, and from wherever you remove your attention, +the world drops. So you can create worlds through your attention. + +Look at it in this way. You are sitting here. If you are in love with someone, then +suddenly only one person remains in this hall; everything else disappears, it is not there. +What happens? Why does only one person remain when you are in love? The whole +world drops really; it is phantom-like, shadows. + +Only one person is real, because now your mind is concentrated on one person, your +mind is totally absorbed in one person. Everything else becomes shadow-like, a shadow +existence — it is not real for you. + +Whenever you can concentrate, the very concentration changes the whole pattern of your +existence, the whole pattern of your mind. Try it — on anything. You can try it on a +Buddha statue or a flower or a tree or anything. Or just on the face of your beloved or +your friend — just look at the face. + +It will be easy, because if you love some face it is very easy to concentrate. And really, +those who tried to concentrate on Buddha, on Jesus, on Krishna, they were lovers; they +loved Buddha. So it was very easy for Sariputta or for Modgalayan or for the other +disciples to concentrate on Buddha's face. The moment they looked at Buddha's face they +were easily flowing towards it. The love was there; they were infatuated. + +So try to find a face — any face you love will do — and just look in the eyes and +concentrate on the face. Suddenly the whole world drops; a new dimension has opened. +Your mind is concentrated on one thing — then that person or that thing becomes the +whole world. + +When I say this, I mean that if your attention is total towards anything, that thing +becomes the whole world. You create the world through your attention. Your world you +create through your own attention. + +And when you are totally absorbed, flowing like a river towards the object, then suddenly +start becoming aware of the original source from where this attention is flowing. The +river is flowing; now become aware of the origin. + +In the beginning you will get lost again and again; you will shift. If you move to the +origin, you will forget the river and the object; the sea towards which it is flowing. It will +change: if you come to the object, you will forget the origin. It is natural, because the +mind has become fixed to either the object or to the subject. + +That's why so many persons go into retreat. They just leave the world. Leaving the world +basically means leaving the object, so that they can concentrate on themselves. It is easy. +If you leave the world and close your eyes and close all your senses, you can be aware of +yourself easily, but again that awareness is false because you have chosen one point of +duality. This is another extreme of the same disease. + +First you were aware of the object — the known, and you were not aware of the subject — +the knower. Now you are fixed with the knower and you have forgotten the known, but +you remain divided in duality. And this is the old mind again in a new pattern. Nothing +has changed. + +That's why my emphasis is not to leave the world of the objects. Don’t leave the world of +the objects. Rather, try to become aware of both the subject and the object +simultaneously, the outer and the inner simultaneously. + + + +If both are there, only then can you be balanced between them. If one is there you will get +obsessed with it. + +Those who go to the Himalayas and close themselves, they are just like you standing in a +reverse position. You are fixed with the objects, they are fixed with the subject. You are +fixed with the outer, they are fixed with the inner. Neither you are free nor they, because +you cannot be free with the one. With the one you become identified. You can be free +only when you become aware of the two. Then you can become the third, and the third is +the free point. With one you become identified. With two you can move, you can shift, +you can balance, and you can come to a midpoint, an absolute midpoint. + +Buddha used to say that his path is a middle path — majjhim nikaya. It has not been really +understood why he insisted so much on calling it the middle path. This is the reason: +because his whole process was of mindfulness — it is the middle path. Buddha says, + +'Don’t leave the world, and don’t cling to the other world. Rather, be in between. Don’t +leave one extreme and move to the other; just be in the middle, because in the middle +both are not. Just in the middle you are free. Just in the middle there is no duality. You +have come to one, and the duality has become just the extension of you — just two +wings.’ + +Buddha’s middle path is based on this technique. + +It is beautiful. For so many reasons it is beautiful. One: it is very scientific, because only +between two can you balance. If there is only one point, imbalance is bound to be there. +So Buddha says that those who are worldly are imbalanced, and those who has renounced +are again imbalanced in the other extreme. A balanced man is one who is neither in this +extreme nor that; he lives just in the middle. You cannot call him worldly, you cannot +call him other-worldly. He is free to move; he is not attached to any. He has come to the +midpoint, the golden mean. + +Secondly: it is very easy to move to the other extreme — very easy. If you eat too much +you can fast easily, but you cannot diet easily. If you talk too much you can go into +silence very easily, but you cannot talk less. If you eat too much, it is very easy not to eat +at all — this is another extreme. But to eat moderately, to come to a midpoint, is very +difficult. To love a person is easy; to hate a person is easy. To be simply indifferent is +very difficult. From one extreme you can move to the other. + +To remain in the middle is very difficult. Why? Because in the middle you have to lose +your mind. Your mind exists in extremes. Mind means the excess. Mind is always +extremist: either you are for or you are against. You cannot be simply neutral. Mind +cannot exist in neutrality: it can be here or there — because mind needs the opposite. + +It needs to be opposed to something. If it is not opposed to anything it disappears. Then +there is no functioning for it; it cannot function. + +Try this. In any way become neutral, indifferent — suddenly mind has no function. If you +are for, you can think; if you are against, you can think. If you are neither for nor against, +what is left to think? Buddha says that indifference is the basis of the middle path. +UPEKSHA indifference — be indifferent to the extremes. Just try one thing: be +indifferent to the extremes. A balancing happens. + +This balancing will give you a new dimension of feeling where you are both the knower +and the known, the world and the other world, this and that, the body and the mind. You +are both, and simultaneously neither — above both. A triangle has come into existence. +You may have seen that many occult, secret societies have used the triangle as their + + + +symbol. The triangle is one of the oldest occult symbols just because of this — because +the triangle has three angles. Ordinarily you have only two angles, the third is missing. It +is not there yet, it has not evolved. The third angle is beyond both. Both belong to it, they +are part of it, and still it is beyond and higher than both. + +If you do this experiment you will help to create a triangle within yourself. The third +angle will arise by and by, and when it comes then you cannot be in misery. + +Once you can witness, you cannot be in misery. Misery means getting identified with +something. + +But one subtle point has to be remembered — then you will not even get identified with +bliss. That’s why Buddha says, 'I can say only this much — that there will be no misery. +In samadhi, in ecstasy, there will be no misery. I cannot say that there will be bliss.’ +Buddha says, 'I cannot say that. I can simply say there will be no misery.’ + +And he is right, because bliss means when there is no identification of any type — not +even with bliss. This is very subtle. If you feel that you are blissful, sooner or later you +will be in misery again. If you feel you are blissful, you are preparing to be miserable +again. You are still getting identified with a mood. + +You feel happy: now you get identified with happiness. The moment you get identified +with happiness, unhappiness has started. Now you will cling to it, now you will become +afraid of the opposite, now you will expect it to remain with you constantly. You have +created all that is needed for misery to be there and then misery will enter, and when you +get identified with happiness, you will get identified with misery. Identification is the +disease. + +At the third point you are not identified with anything: whatsoever comes and passes, +comes and passes; you remain a witness, just a spectator — neutral, indifferent, +unidentified. + + +The morning comes and the sun rises and you witness it. You don’t say, 'I am the +morning.’ Then when the noon comes, you don’t say, 'I have become the noon.’ You +witness it. And when the sun sets and darkness comes and the night, you don’t say, 'I am +the darkness and the night.��� You witness it. You say, 'There was morning, then there was +noon, then there was evening and now there is night. And again there will be morning +and the circle will go on and I am just an onlooker. I go on witnessing.’ + +If the same becomes possible with your moods — moods of the morning and moods of the +noon and moods of the evening and the night, and they have their own circle, they go on +moving — you become a witness. You say, 'Now happiness has come — just like a +morning. And now night will come — the misery. The moods will go on changing around +me, and I will remain centered in myself. I will not get attached to any mood. I will not +cling to any mood. I will not hope for anything and I will not feel frustrated. I will simply +witness. Whatsoever happens, I will see it. When it comes, I will see; when it goes, I will +see.’ + +Buddha uses this many times. He says again and again that when a thought arises, look at +it. A thought of misery, a thought of happiness arises — look at it. It comes to a climax — +look at it. Then it starts falling down — look at it. Then it disappears — look at it. + + +Arising, existing, dying, and you remain just a witness; go on looking at it. This third +point makes you a witness, SAKSHI, and to be a witness is the highest possibility of + + + +consciousness. + + +The second technique: + +BELOVED, + +AT THIS MOMENT + +LET MIND, KNOWING, BREATH, FORM, + +BE INCLUDED. + +BELOVED, AT THIS MOMENT LET MIND, KNOWING, BREATH, FORM, BE +INCLUDED. + +This technique is a little difficult, but if you can do it, then very wonderful, beautiful. +Sitting, don’t divide. Sitting in meditation, be inclusive of all — your body, your mind, +your breath, your thinking, your knowing, everything. Be inclusive of all. Don’t divide, +don’t create any fragmentation. Ordinarily we are fragmenting; we go on fragmenting. +We say, 'The body is not me.’ There are techniques which can use that also, but this +technique is totally different; rather, the opposite. + +Don’t divide. Don’t say, 'I am not the body.’ Don’t say, 'I am not the breath.’ Don’t say, 'I +am not the mind.’ Just say, 'I am all’ — and be all. Don’t create any fragmentation within +you. This is a feeling. With closed eyes include everything that exists in you. Don’t get +yourself centered anywhere — be uncentered. The breath comes and goes, the thought +comes and moves. The form of your body will go on changing. You have not observed +this. + + +If you sit with closed eyes, you will feel that sometimes your body is big, sometimes your +body is small; sometimes it is very heavy, sometimes just light, as if you can fly. You can +feel this increasing and decreasing of the form. Just close your eyes and sit and you will +feel that sometimes the body is very big — filling the whole room; sometimes it is so +small — just atomic. Why does this form change? As your attention changes, the fonn of +the body changes. If you are inclusive, it will become big; if you exclude — this is not I, +this is not I — then it will become very minute, very small, atomic. + +This sutra says: + +BELOVED, + +AT THIS MOMENT + +LET MIND, KNOWING, BREATH, FORM, + +BE INCLUDED. + +Include everything in your being and don’t discard anything. Don’t say, 'This is not I,’ +say, 'I am,’ and include everything in it. If you can do this just sitting, wonderful, +absolutely new happenings will happen to you. Y ou will feel there is no center; in you +there is no center. And with the center gone, there is no self, there is no ego; only +consciousness remains — consciousness like a sky covering everything. And when it +grows, not only your own breath will be included, not only your own fonn will be +included; ultimately the whole universe becomes inclusive to you. + +Swami Ramteerth used this technique for his own sadhana. + + + +A moment came when he started saying, ' The whole world is in me, and the stars move +in me.’ Somebody was talking to him and he said, 'It is very beautiful here in the +Himalayas.’ Ramteerth was staying in the Himalayas, and the man said to him, 'It is very +beautiful here in the Himalayas.’ And Ramteerth is reported to have said, 'Himalayas? + +The Himalayas are in me.’ + +The man must have thought that he was mad. How could the Himalayas be in him? But if +you practise this meditation, you can feel that the Himalayas are in you. Let me explain +how it is possible. + +Really, when you look at me you cannot look at the one who is here sitting in the chair. +Really, you are looking at a picture of me which is in you, in your mind. How can you +know me here on this chair? Your eyes carry just a picture. Not even a picture — just rays +of light enter in your eyes. And then the eyes don’t go themselves to the mind; just rays +passing through the eyes go inside. And your nervous system which carries those rays +cannot carry them as rays; it transforms them into chemicals. So only chemicals travel, +and these chemicals are decoded and you see me in your mind. + +You have never been out of your mind. The whole world that you know, you decode it in +your mind, you know it in your mind. All the Himalayas and all the suns and the stars +and the moons, they are there in your mind in a very subtle existence. + +If you close your eyes and feel that everything is inclusive, you will know that the whole +world is moving within you. And once you feel this — that the whole world is moving +within you — all your individual misery is lost. You are no more an individual. You have +become the absolute, the non-individual. You have become the whole existence. + +This technique expands your consciousness. Now in the west, many drugs are being used +to expand consciousness — LSD, marijuana, and other drugs. In India also, in the old +days, they were used, because they give a false feeling of expansion. All those who use +drugs, for them this technique will be beautiful, very helpful, because their hankering is +for expansion. + +When you take LSD, you are no more confined in yourself, you have become inclusive of +all. There have been cases.... One girl jumped from a seven-storey building because she +felt that she could not die, death was impossible. She felt that she could fly, and she felt +that there were no barriers, there was no fear. She jumped out of a seven-storey building +and died, shattered. But in her mind, under the influence of the drug, there was no +limitation, no death. + +Expansion of consciousness has become a fad, because when you expand you feel high. +The whole world, by and by, becomes included in you. You become great, infinitely +great, and with greatness, with expansion, all your individual miseries fall. + +But through LSD or marijuana or other drugs, this is only a false feeling. + +Through this technique, this feeling becomes real — really the whole world comes within +you. There are two reasons for this. One: our individual consciousness is not really +individual; deep down it is collective. We look like islands, but all the islands deep down +are connected to the earth. We look like islands, different — I am conscious, you are +conscious — but your consciousness and my consciousness somewhere deep down is one. +It is connected to the earth, the basic ground. + +That’s why many things happen which look inexplicable. If you meditate alone it will be +more difficult to enter into it, but if you meditate with a group it is very easy, because the +whole group works as a unit. In meditation camps I have felt and observed that after two + + + +or three days your individuality is no more; you become part of a greater consciousness. +And very subtle waves are being felt, very subtle waves start moving, and the group +consciousness evolves. + +So when you dance, you are not really dancing, but the group consciousness is dancing; +you are just a part of it. The rhythm is not only within you, the rhythm is also without +you. The rhythm is all around you. In a group you are not. The superficial phenomenon +of being islands is forgotten and the deeper phenomenon of being one is realized. + +In a group you are nearer to the divine; alone you are further away, because again you +become concentrated on the ego, on the superficial difference, on the superficial +separation. This technique helps, because really you are one with the universe. It is only a +question of how to dig it or how to fall into it and realize it. + +Being with a friendly group always gives you energy. Being with someone who is +antagonistic, you always feel that your energy has been drained out. Why? If you are +with a friendly group, in a family, and you are sitting, relaxing, just being together, you +feel energized, vitalized. Meeting a friend, you feel more alive than you were before. Just +passing an enemy, you feel that you have lost some energy, you feel tired. What +happens? + +When you are meeting a friendly sympathetic group, you forget your individuality; you +drop down to the basic level where you can meet. When someone is antagonistic, you +become more individual, egoistic; you cling to your ego. Because of that clinging you +feel tired. All energy comes from the roots; all energy comes with the feeling of a +collective being. + +In the beginning, doing this meditation you will feel a collective being arising, and then +ultimately a cosmic consciousness arises. When all differences are lost, all boundaries +disappear and existence remains as one piece, one unit, one whole; then everything is +included. + +This effort to include everything starts from your own individual existence. Include. + +BELOVED, + +AT THIS MOMENT + +LET MIND, KNOWING, BREATH, FORM, + +BE INCLUDED. + +The basic point is to remember inclusiveness. Don't exclude. This is the key for this sutra +— inclusiveness, include. Include and grow. Include and expand. Try it with your body, +and then try it with the outside world also. + +Sitting under a tree, look at the tree, then close your eyes and feel that the tree is within +you. Look at the sky, then close your eyes and feel that the sky is within you. Look at the +rising sun, then close your eyes and feel that the sun is rising within you. Feel more +inclusive. + +A tremendous experience will happen to you. When you feel that the tree is within you, +immediately you will feel more young, more fresh. And this is not imagination, because +the tree and you both belong to the earth. You both are rooted in the same earth and +ultimately rooted in the same existence. So when you feel that the tree is within you, the +tree IS within you — this is not an imagination — and immediately you will feel the effect. +The tree's aliveness, the greenery, the freshness, the breeze passing through it, will be felt + + + +within you in your heart. Include more and more existence and don’t exclude. + +In many ways, many world teachers have been teaching this. + +Jesus says, 'Love your enemy as yourself.’ This is an experiment in inclusiveness. Freud +used to say, 'Why should I love my enemy as myself? He is my enemy, so why should I +love him as myself? And how can I love?’ His question seems relevant, but he is not +aware of why Jesus says to love your enemy as yourself. It is not for any social politics, +not for any change in society, not to create a better society, but to give you an expanded +feeling of being and consciousness. + +If you can include the enemy within yourself, he cannot harm you. That doesn’t mean that +he cannot kill you: he can kill you, but he cannot hann you. The harm comes when you +exclude him. The moment you exclude him, you become the ego, separate, alone, cut off +from existence. If you include the enemy within you, then everything is included. When +the enemy can be included, then why not the tree and why not the sky? + +The emphasis for the enemy is that if you can include the enemy in your being, you can +include everything; then there is no need to exclude anything. If you feel that your enemy +is included within you, then even your enemy will give you vitality, energy. He cannot be +hannful to you. He can kill, you, but even while he is murdering you, he cannot harm +you. That harm comes from your own mind when you exclude. + +But the case with us is totally diametrically opposite — even friends are not included. + +Enemies are excluded, and even friends are not included. Even your lover, your beloveds, +are not included. While being with your lover, you are not merging in him or her. You +remain separate, you control yourself. You don’t want to lose your identity. Because of +this, love has become impossible. + +Unless you lose identity how can you love? You want to remain yourself, and your lover +wants to remain himself, and no one is ready to merge, no one is ready to include. Both +exclude, both are bracketed in themselves: there is no meeting, no merging, no +communion. If even lovers are not included, then it is bound to be that your existence is +the poorest possible. You are alone, poor, a beggar. With the whole existence included, +you are the emperor. + +So remember this: make it a style of life to include. Not only meditation, but a style of +life, a way of living. Try to include more and more. The more you include, the more you +expand, the more your boundaries recede to the very corners of existence. One day only +you are; the whole existence is included. This is the ultimate of all religious experience. + +BELOVED +AT THIS MOMENT + +LET MIND, KNOWING, BREATH, FORM, + +BE INCLUDED. + + +THE END. + + + +Chapter 62: Right now is the goal + + +Question 1 + +YESTERDAY YOU SAID THAT ONE SHOULD HURRY TOWARDS THE GOAL +BECAUSE WHATEVER TIME WE HAVE IS VERY LITTLE. HOWEVER, SOME +TIME AGO YOU ALSO SAID THAT THE WHOLE PROCESS OF ATTAINING THE +GOAL SHOULD BE AN EFFORTLESS PLAY. HOW WOULD YOU RECONCILE +THE TWO WORDS 'HURRY' AND 'PLAY'? - BECAUSE THE ONE WHO +HURRIES NEVER GETS THE JOY OF PLAYING. + +The first thing: don’t try to reconcile different techniques. When I say don't be in a hurry, +forget time completely, don't be serious, don’t make any effort, surrender, be in a let-go, +this is a different technique. This is suitable only for a part of humanity — all cannot do +this technique — and the type of person who can do this cannot do the opposite one. + +This technique is for the feminine mind. All females are not necessarily feminine, and all +males are not necessarily male, so when I say a feminine mind, I don’t mean females. A +feminine mind means a mind who can surrender, who can be receptive like a womb, who +can be open, passive. Half of the humanity can be of this type, but the other half is totally +opposite. As man and woman are the two halves of humanity, in just the same way the +feminine mind and the masculine mind are the two halves of the human mind. + +The feminine mind cannot make effort. If it makes effort it will never reach anywhere. +The effort will be the undoing for it; it will only create anguish and tension and no +achievement. + +The very working of the feminine mind is to wait and allow things to happen. + +Just like a woman: even if she is in love, she will not take the initiative. And if a woman +takes the initiative, you have every reason to be afraid and escape, because that attitude is +the male attitude — in the feminine body there is a masculine mind, and you will be in +difficulty. If you are really male, immediately the woman will lose attraction. If you are +feminine — male in the body but feminine in the mind — only then can you allow the +woman to take initiative and you will be happy. But then physically she is a woman and +you are a man; mentally you are feminine and she is masculine, she is male. + +A woman will wait. She will never utter the words 'I love you’ before you have uttered +them and you have committed yourself. In the very waiting is the feminine power. The +male mind is aggressive. It has to do something. It has to move and go and take initiative. +The same happens on the spiritual path. If you have an aggressive mind, a male mind, +effort is necessary. Then make hurry; then don’t lose time and opportunity. Then create +an urgency and crisis so that you can put all your being into your effort. When your effort +has become total you will achieve. If your mind is feminine, then there is no hurry at all. +There is no time. + +You may or may not have observed that women have no sense of time — they cannot +have. + +So the husband is standing outside the house and he is honking the horn and saying, +'Come down!’ And the wife says, 'I have told you a thousand times that I am coming in +one minute. Continuously for two hours I have been telling you that I am coming in one +minute. So don’t get mad. Why are you honking the horn?’ + + + +The feminine mind cannot have a sense of time. It is the male, aggressive mind who is +time- worried, time-conscious. They are totally different. + +The feminine is not in any hurry — there is no hurry. Really, there is nowhere to reach. +That's why women cannot become great leaders, great scientists, great warriors — they +cannot become. And if sometimes there are freak women, they have a male mind. For +example, Joan of Arc, or Laxmi Bai: they are only feminine in body; the mind is not +feminine at all. It is masculine. + +For the feminine mind there is no goal, and our world is man-oriented. So women cannot +be really great in a man-oriented world, because greatness is related to the goal. Some +goal has to be achieved; then you become great — and the feminine mind is not after any +goal. Here and now she is happy. Here and now she is unhappy. There is nowhere to +move. + +The feminine mind exists in the moment. That's why the feminine curiosity is never for +the far-away; it is always about the neighborhood. She is not interested in what is +happening in Vietnam. + +She is interested in what is happening in the other house — the intimate, the here. The +man looks absurd: 'Why are you worried about what Nixon is doing or what Mao is +doing?’ The woman is interested in the love affairs that are going on in the neighborhood. +She is curious about the near; the far is meaningless. Time doesn’t exist. + +Time exists for those who have a goal to reach. Remember, time can exist only when you +have to reach somewhere. If you don’t have to reach anywhere, what is the meaning of +time? Then there is no hurry. + +Look at this situation from a different angle. The east is feminine and the west is +masculine. The east has never been concerned much about time; the west is mad after +time. The east has been very leisurely: moving slowly as if not moving at all; no change, +no revolution. Such a silent evolution that it creates no noise anywhere. The west is just +mad: every day revolution is needed, and everything has to become a revolution. Unless +everything is changing, it seems we are not going anywhere; we have become static. If +everything is changing and everything remains in an upheaval, then the west feels that +something is happening. And the east thinks that if there are upheavals, it means we are +diseased. Something is wrong; that’s why there is change. If everything is okay, there is +no need for any revolution, for any change. + +The eastern mind is feminine. + +That’s why in the east, we have praised all the feminine qualities: compassion, love, +sympathy, non-violence, acceptance, contentment — all feminine qualities. In the west, all +the masculine qualities are praised: will, willpower, ego, self-esteem, independence, +rebellion — these are the values praised there. In the east — obedience, surrender, +acceptance. The basic attitude is feminine in the east and masculine in the west. + +These techniques are not to be compromised, are not to be in any way synthesized. The +technique of surrender is for the feminine mind. The technique of effort, will, endeavor, +is for the masculine mind. And they are bound to be polar opposites, so if you make any +synthesis between the two you will create a hodge-podge — meaningless, absurd, and +even dangerous. It will not be of use for anyone. + +So remember this. These techniques many times will look contradictory, because they are +meant to be for different types of mind, and there is no effort to make any synthesis. So if +you feel something is contradictory, don’t get uneasy about it — it is. And only very small + + + +minds become afraid of contradiction — very small minds, petty minds. They become +uneasy, they feel a discomfort. They think everything must be non-contradictory, +everything must be consistent. This is nonsense, because life is inconsistent. + +Life is contradictory itself, so truth cannot be uncontradictory; only lies can be +uncontradictory, only lies can be consistent. + +Truth is bound to be inconsistent, because it has to cover everything that is in life. It has +to be total. And life is contradictory. There is man and there is woman: what can I do and +what can Shiva do? And man is totally the polar opposite to woman; that's why they are +attracted. Otherwise there would be no attraction. Really, the opposite type of being, the +difference, creates the attraction. The polar opposite becomes a magnetic force. That's +why when man and woman meet there is happiness, because when two polar opposites +meet they negate each other. They negate each other because they are opposites. They +negate each other, and for a single moment when man and woman really meet — not just +bodily, but totally; when their beings meet in love — for a single moment both disappear. +Then there is neither man nor woman; pure existence exists — that's the bliss of it. + +The same can happen within you also, because deep analysis shows that within you also +there is a polarity. Now modern deep psychoanalytic approaches have revealed that the +conscious mind and the unconscious mind are polar opposites within you also. If you are +a man, your conscious mind is masculine, your unconscious mind is feminine. If you are +a woman, your conscious mind is feminine, your unconscious mind is masculine. The +unconscious is the opposite of the conscious. In deep meditation there comes a deep +orgasm, an intercourse, a love, between your conscious and unconscious — they become +one. + +When they become one you attain to the highest bliss possible. + +So man and woman can meet in two ways. You can meet a woman outside you: then this +meeting can be only momentary, very momentary. For a single second the peak conies, +and then things start falling away. There is another meeting of man and woman that +happens within you: your conscious and unconscious mind meet. When this happens, this +meeting can be eternal. The sexual pleasure is also a glimpse of the spiritual — only +momentary — but when the real meeting happens within, then it becomes samadhi, then it +becomes a spiritual phenomenon. + +But you have to start from your conscious mind, so if your conscious mind is feminine, +surrender will be helpful. And remember, being a woman is not necessarily synonymous +with having a feminine mind. That creates the difficulty. Otherwise everything would be +very easy: then women would follow the path of surrender and men would follow the +path of will. But it is not so easy. There are women who have masculine minds — their +very approach towards life is aggressive. And they are growing every day. + +The women's lib. movement will create more and more masculine women. They will be +more and more aggressive, and the path of surrender will not be for them then. And +because women are becoming competitive with man, man is regressing from aggression; +he is becoming more and more feminine. + +More and more the path of surrender will be useful for man in the future. + +So you have to decide about yourself. And don't think in terms of valuation. Don't think +that you are a man, so how can you have a feminine mind? You can have, and nothing is +wrong in it; it is beautiful. And don’t think that you are a woman, so how can you have a + + + +masculine mind? Nothing is wrong in it; it is beautiful. Be authentic towards your own +mind. Try to understand what type of mind you have, then follow the path that is for you, +and don't try to create any synthesis. + +Don't ask me how I am going to reconcile these two. I am not going to. I am never for +reconciliation, and I am not for non-contradictory statements. They are stupid and +childish. Life is contradictory, and that's why life is alive. Only death is consistent and +non-contradictory. Life lives through opposition, through encountering the opposite pole, +and this opposition, challenge, creates energy. It releases energy, and life moves through +it. This is what Hegelians say: a dialectical movement — thesis, antithesis, and then the +synthesis again becomes a thesis and creates its own antithesis, and this goes on. Life is +not monotonous. It is not logical. It is dialectical. + +You must understand the difference between logical and dialectical. The question is +because you think life is logical, so you ask how you will reconcile, because logic always +reconciles; logic cannot tolerate the contradictory. + +Logic cannot tolerate the contradictory. Logic has to somehow explain that it is not +contradictory, and if it is contradictory then both cannot be true; then one must be wrong. +Both can be wrong, but both cannot be true. Logic tries to find non-contradiction +everywhere. + +Science is logical. That’s why science is not totally true to life, cannot be. Life is +contradictory, illogical. It works through the opposite. It is not afraid of the opposite; it +uses the opposite. The opposites are only apparently opposite; deep down they work +together. It is dialectical, not logical. It is a dialogue between the opposites — a +continuous dialogue. + +Think for a single moment: if there is no contradiction, life will be dead, because from +where will come the challenge? From where will come the attraction? From where will +the energy be released? It will be monotonous, dead, Life is possible only because of +dialectics, because of the opposite. Man and woman is the basic opposition, and then the +challenge creates the phenomenon of love. And the whole life moves around love. If your +lover and you become so totally one that there is no gap at all, you both will be dead. + +You will not be able to exist then. You both will disappear from this dialectical process. +You can only exist in this life if oneness is never total, and you have to move away again +and again to come near. + +That's why lovers fight. That fight creates dialectics. The whole day they will fight. They +will go far away from each other, they will become enemies. This means that they have +now come to be really polar opposites; they have moved as far away as possible. The +lover starts thinking how to kill this woman, and the woman starts thinking how to get rid +of this man. They have moved to the very farthest comer possible. And then again in the +evening they are making love. + +When they are far away, so far away, again the attraction comes. Again they look from +such a faraway point that they feel attracted. Then they have become simply man and +woman again, not lovers. Then they are man and woman, strangers. They will fall in love +again. They will come near. A point will come when they will become one for a single +moment, and that will be their happiness, their joy. + +But the moment they have become one, the process to go away starts again. In the very +moment when the wife and husband are one, if they can be a witness to it, they will see +they have started being separate again. The very moment the peak comes, the process + + + +starts to be different, to be separate, to be opposite. This goes on moving — again and +again you come near and go away. + +This is what I mean — life creates energy through polarities. Without polarities life +cannot exist. If two lovers really become one, they disappear from life. + +They are liberated really. They will have no rebirth again; there will be no life in future. + +If two lovers can become so totally one, their love has become the deepest meditation +possible. They have achieved what Buddha achieved under the Bodhi tree. They have +achieved what Jesus achieved on the cross. They have achieved non-duality. Now they +cannot exist. + +Existence as we know it is dual, dialectical, and these techniques are for you who exist in +duality. So there will be many contradictions, because these techniques are not +philosophy; these techniques are meant to be done and lived. They are not mathematical +formulas; they are actual life processes. They are dialectical, they are contradictory. So +don't ask me to reconcile them. They are not the same, they are opposite. + +Try to find out what is your type. Can you relax? Can you let go? Can you be in a passive +moment, not doing anything? — then all the techniques which require will are not for you. +If you cannot relax, and if I say to you to relax and you immediately ask me how to relax, +that 'how' shows your mind. That 'how' shows that you cannot relax without making an +effort. Even for relaxation you need some effort, so you ask 'how;. Relaxation is +relaxation; there is no 'how' to it. If you can relax, you know how to relax. You simply +relax. There is no effort, no method. + +Just as in the night, you go to sleep. + +You never ask how to go to sleep. But there are persons who have insomnia. If you say to +them, 'I just put my head on the pillow, and it’s okay, I am asleep,’ they cannot believe +you. And their suspicion is meaningful. They cannot believe you; you are deceiving — +because they also put their head on the pillow. They go on putting their head the whole +night — nothing happens. + +They are going to ask how — how to put the head on the pillow? There must be a secret +which you are not telling them. You are deceiving; the whole world is deceiving them. +Everybody says, 'We just go to sleep. There is no 'how' to it. There is no technology.' +They cannot believe you, and you cannot blame them. You say, 'We simply put down our +heads, close our eyes, put off the light, and we are asleep.’ + +They also do the same procedure, they do the same ritual, and they do it more correctly +than you have ever done, but nothing happens. The light is off, they have closed eyes, +lying on their bed — nothing is happening. Once you lose the capacity to relax, then +technique is needed. Then they need technique; then without technique they will not be +able to sleep. + +So if you have a mind which can relax, then surrender is for you. And don’t create any +problems — then simply surrender. At least half of you can do this. You may not be +aware, but fifty percent is the possibility, because masculine and feminine minds exist in +a proportion. + +They are always fifty-fifty, almost fifty-fifty, in every realm, because a man cannot exist +without a woman opposing him. There is a deep balance in nature. + +Do you know? — one hundred and fifteen boys are bom to one hundred girls, because +boys are weaker than girls — so by the time they are sexually mature fifteen boys will + + + +have died. One hundred and fifteen boys are bom for every one hundred girls. Girls are +stronger: they have more stamina, more resistance. Boys are weak, they don’t have so +much resistance, so one hundred and fifteen boys are born for one hundred girls. Then +fifteen boys die. The moment they become sexually mature, by the age of fourteen, the +number will be the same. For each man a woman exists, for each woman a man exists, +because there is an inner tension. They cannot exist without it; that polar opposite is +needed. + +And similar is the case with the inner mind also. The existence, the nature, needs a +balance, so half of you are feminine and can be deeply in surrender very easily. But you +can create problems for yourself. You may feel that you can surrender, but you think, +'How can I surrender?’ You feel that your ego may be hurt. You become afraid of +surrendering, because it has been taught to you: 'Be independent. Remain independent. +Don’t lose yourself. Don’t give your control to someone else. Always be in control.’ + +This has been taught; these are taught difficulties. + +So you can feel that you can surrender, but then other problems arise which have been +given to you by society, culture and education. And they create problems. If you really +feel that surrender is not for you, then forget it. It is not to be worried about. Then put all +your energy in effort. + +So these are the two extremes. One: if you are a really feminine mind, you have nowhere +to go. There is no goal, no God to be achieved, no future heaven — nothing. Don’t be in +any hurry now, remain true to the moment, and all that can be achieved by the male mind +through hurry, effort, you will achieve here and now without any effort. Right now you +are at the goal, if you can relax. + +The male mind will have to run round about and round about until it is tired completely, +and then it falls down; only then it can relax. Aggression, effort, endeavor, are necessary +for the male mind to be exhausted. When that exhaustion happens, then it is possible for +it to relax and to surrender. That surrender will come only in the end; for the feminine +mind it is always in the beginning. You reach the same happening but the ways of +reaching are different. + +So when I said yesterday, 'Don’t waste time,’ I said it to the male mind. If I said be in a +hurry and create such an emergency that your total energy and being becomes pinpointed, +concentrated, and only in that concentrated effort your life will become a flame, this is +for the male mind, the masculine mind. + +For the feminine mind, relax and you are already a flame. + +Because of this, you have Mahavir, you have Buddha, you have Jesus, Krishna, Ram, +Zarathustra, Moses, but you don’t have a similar list of women. Not because women have +not achieved such a state of mind. They have achieved, but their ways are different. And +this whole history has been recorded by man, and man can understand only the masculine +mind. Man cannot understand the feminine mind. That’s the problem. It is really very +difficult. + +A man cannot understand that a woman, just by being a simple housewife, can achieve +something which a Buddha achieves with so much difficulty, so arduously. A man cannot +conceive, it is impossible for him to conceive that a woman can achieve just by being a +housewife: living moment to moment, enjoying moment to moment, just near and here +and now, and not bothering about anything else — no goal, no spirituality; just loving the +children, loving the husband, just being an ordinary woman, but blissful. No need to + + + +make such arduous effort as a Mahavir is making — twelve years of long arduous effort. +But man will appreciate Mahavir, because he can appreciate effort. + +If you achieve a goal without the effort, for man it is not worth it. He cannot appreciate it. +He can appreciate someone, a Tensing, a Hillary, reaching the Everest — not because +Everest is worth it, but because so much effort is needed and it is so dangerous. + +And if you say that you are already on the Everest he will laugh, because Everest is not +meaningful — the effort to reach it is meaningful. The moment Everest becomes easy to +reach, for the masculine mind all attraction is lost. There is nothing to be achieved on the +Everest. When Hillary and Tensing reached there, nothing was there to be achieved, but +the masculine mind feels such a glory. + +When Hillary reached, I was in a university; all the professors were just thrilled. I asked +one woman professor, 'What do you say about Hillary and Tensing who have reached +Everest?’ + +She said, 'I cannot understand why there is so much fuss about it. What is the point? + +What have they gained by reaching there? Even reaching to the market, to a shop, would +have been better.’ + +For the feminine mind it is useless. Going to the moon? — why such danger? There is no +necessity. But for the masculine mind, it is not the goal. Really, the effort is the thing, +because then he proves that he is masculine. They very effort, the very aggression, and +the very possibility of death, gives him the thrill. + +Danger is very appealing to the masculine mind. For the feminine mind it has no appeal +at all. Because of this, human history is really half-recorded. The other half has been +totally unrecorded, left unrecorded. We don’t know how many woman became Buddhas; +it is impossible to know, because our measurement, our criterion, cannot be applied to the +feminine mind. + + +So first decide about your own mind. First meditate about your own mind — what type of +mind you have got — then forget all those methods which don’t belong to you. And don’t +try to reconcile them. + +Question 2 + +YOU HAVE SAID, 'LEARN TO INCLUDE MORE AND MORE OF EXISTENCE +INTO YOUR BEING. DRAW ENERGY FROM THE ROOT SOURCE OF ALL +EXISTENCE. BE INCLUSIVE EVEN OF YOUR ENEMY.’ HOW CAN I BE +INCLUSIVE OF MY ENEMY WHILE AT THE SAME TIME GOING FULLY INTO +THE EMOTION OF HATRED? DOES THIS NOT LEAD TO SUPPRESSION? + +I have said to be inclusive even of your enemy, but I have not said to start from the +enemy. Start from the friend. As you are right now, you are not even inclusive of the +friend. Start from the friend. Even that is difficult — to include the friend into your being, +to allow him to enter in you and penetrate you, to be open to him, vulnerable. Start from +the friend. Start from the lover, the beloved. Don’t jump to the enemy. + +And why do you jump to the enemy? — because then you can say, 'It is impossible, it +cannot be done,’ so you can discard it. Start from the first step. You start from the last. +How can the journey become possible? You always start from the last step. The first has +not been taken yet, so the last is only in the imagination. And you feel it is impossible. Of +course, it is impossible. How can you start from the end? The enemy is the last point to + + + +be included. + + +If you can include your friend it becomes possible, because only friends become enemies. +You cannot make someone an enemy without making him first your friend. Or can you? +Friendship will be needed first if you want to make someone your enemy. Friendship will +be the first step. + +Buddha is reported to have said, 'Don't make friends, because that is the first step +towards making enemies.’ Buddha says, 'Be friendly; don’t make friends. If you make +friends you have already taken the first step; now it is not very far from when you will +make the enemy.’ + +Include the friend. Start from the near, begin from the beginning. Only then is it possible. +You don’t feel any difficulty. When you have to include the friend and be inclusive of the +friend, it is difficult, because it is not a question of the friend or the enemy. It is a +question of your opening. Even for the friend you are closed; even with the friend you +remain guarded; even with the friend you have not revealed your being totally, so how +can you include him? + +You can include him only when there is no fear, when you are not afraid, when you can +allow him to move within you, and you are not making any security arrangements. Even +with the beloved you are closed; you have not opened your mind. Still there are a few +things which are secret, private. If you have privacy you cannot be open, you cannot be +inclusive, because then the privacy can be known, then your secrets can become public. + +It is not easy to include even a friend, so don’t think it is difficult to include an enemy — it +is impossible right now. + +That’s why Jesus' teaching became impossible, and Christians became pseudo. They had +to, because Jesus says, 'Love your enemies,’ and you are not even capable of loving your +friends. He gives you an impossible goal. You are bound to become hypocrites, pseudo; +you will not be authentic. You will talk about loving — loving your enemies — and you +will hate your friends. I am not saying that. + +So the first thing: don’t think of the enemy right now. That’s a trick of your mind. Think +of the friend. The second thing: the question is not to include someone; the question is to +be inclusive. That’s a quality of your consciousness. Create the inclusiveness, create the +quality. + +How can you create the quality? — for that is the technique. You are sitting near a tree. +Look at the tree. It is outside you, but if it is really outside you, you cannot know it. +Something of it has already travelled within you; that’s how you can know the tree is +there. It is green. But do you know that the green exists in you, not in the tree? When you +close your eyes, the tree is not green. + +Now scientists say this — that the color is given by you. Everything in nature is colorless; +there exists no color. Color comes into being when rays travelling from a particular +object meet your eye. + +Then the color is created. So color is given by your eye. It is a meeting of the tree and +you where green-ness happens. The flowers are there in bloom: the scent comes to you, +and you smell it. But that fragrance also is given by you; it is not in nature. Only waves +are coming towards you which you translate as smell. It is your nose which smells it. If +you are not there, there will be no smell. + + + +There have been philosophers like Berkeley or Nagarjuna, Shankara, who say the world +is unreal, it exists in your mind, because whatsoever we know about the world is really +given by us. Because of this, Immanuel Kant, a German thinker and philosopher, says +that the thing-in-itself cannot be known. Whatsoever we know is not the thing; it is our +projection. + +Your face looks beautiful to me. Your face is neither beautiful nor ugly; it is my attitude. +It is I who make you beautiful or ugly. It depends on me: it is my feeling. If you are alone +in the world and there is no one to say that you are ugly or beautiful, you will not be +either. Or will you be? If you are alone on the earth, will you be beautiful or ugly? Will +you be intelligent or foolish? You will be nothing. Really you cannot exist alone on the +earth. You cannot be. + +If you are sitting near a tree, meditate. Open your eyes and look at the tree, and then close +your eyes and look at the tree within. If you try it — again open the eyes, meditate on the +tree and then close the eyes and look at the tree within — in the beginning the tree within +will be a faint shadow of the tree without, but if you go on continuing, by and by it will +come to have the same reality and being as the tree without. + + +And if you continue and persist, which is difficult, a moment comes when the outer tree +becomes just a shadow of the inner. The inner becomes more beautiful, more alive, +because now your inner consciousness is the soil for it. Now it is rooted in the inner +consciousness. Now it is feeling on the consciousness, really. It is something rare. + +So when Jesus or people like Jesus talk about the kingdom of God, they talk in such +colorful language that we think that either they are mad, or just in hallucination. They are +neither. They have learned how to include existence. Their own inner consciousness has +become now a life-giving phenomenon. Now whatsoever is planted within becomes +alive. It is more colorful, more fragrant, more vital — as if it doesn’t belong to this world, +this mundane world; it belongs to some other world. Poets know this a little. Mystics +know it very deeply, but poets also know it a little. They have a glimpse. They can feel +the world included in them. + +Try it — to be inclusive. This is what I mean when I say to be inclusive: let the tree go in +and be rooted there. Let the flower go in and allow it to flower there. You cannot believe +it, because there is no way unless you experience it. Concentrate on a bud, a bud of a rose +flower. Concentrate on it, go on concentrating on it, and allow it to be transferred to the +inner. + +And when really your inner experience of the bud has become so real that the outer, the +real bud, the so-called real bud, appears to be just a shadow of it — the real idea is now +inside, the real essence is inside, and the outer is just a faint copy — when you have come +to this point, close your eyes and concentrate on the inner bud. + +You will be amazed, because the inner bud will start opening. It will become a flower, +and such a flower that you have not known. And you cannot meet that flower outside. +Now this is a rare phenomenon when something starts growing within you, opening, +blooming. + +In this way be inclusive, and then by and by allow your boundaries to expand. Include +your lovers, your friends, your family, include strangers, and then by and by you will be +able to include the enemy. That will be the last point. And when you can include the +enemy and you can allow him to enter in you and be rooted there and become part of + + + +your consciousness, then nothing is inimical to you. Then the whole world has become +your home. Then nothing is strange, no one is alien, and you are at ease in it. + +But be aware of the cunning mind. The mind will always say to you something which +you cannot do, and when you cannot do it, the mind will say, 'These are absurd things. +Leave them.’ The mind will set a target which cannot be reached. Always remember that, +and don’t be a victim of your own mind. Always start from somewhere which is possible; +don’t jump to the impossible. If you can grow in the possible, the impossible is only the +other end of it. It is not opposite to it; it is only the other end. It is the same spectrum — +the other end of the spectrum. + +Question 1 + +ONE QUESTION MORE IS INCLUDED IN IT: HOW CAN I BE INCLUSIVE OF MY +ENEMY WHILE AT THE SAME TIME GOING FULLY INTO THE EMOTION OF +HATRED? DOES THIS NOT LEAD TO SUPPRESSION? + +This is a subtle point to be understood deeply. + +While you hate, I don’t say suppress it, because whatsoever is suppressed is dangerous. +And if you suppress something you cannot be open ever. Then you create a private world +which will not allow you to include others. You will always be afraid of this which you +have suppressed, because any moment this can come out. So first thing: don’t suppress +anger, hatred, or anything. But there is no need to express it on someone. + +You express it on someone because you feel the other is responsible — that is wrong. The +other is not responsible; only you are responsible. You feel hate because you are hateful, +and the other only gives you an opportunity, nothing else. If you come and abuse me, you +simply give me an opportunity to bring out whatsoever is in me. If there is hate, hate +comes out. If there is love, then love will come out. If there is compassion, then +compassion will come out. You are just an opportunity for me to be revealed. + +If hate comes out, don’t feel that the other is responsible. He is just instrumental. We have +a beautiful word in Sanskrit for it — ninnit — instrumental. He is not the cause; the cause +is always within. He is just the instrument to bring the cause out. So just be thankful to +him — be thankful that he makes you aware of your own hidden hate. He is a friend. You +convert him into an enemy because you impose all responsibility on him. You think that +he is creating the hatred. + +No one can create anything in you, remember that forever. + +If you go to Buddha and abuse him, he is not going to hate you, he is not going to be +angry with you. Whatsoever you do, you cannot make him angry. Not because your effort +is less, but because the anger is not there; you cannot bring it out. The other is not the +source of hate, so don’t throw it on him. Just be thankful to him, be grateful to him, and +the hate that is within you, throw it out unto the sky. The first thing. + +The second thing: be inclusive about hate also. That’s a deeper realm, a deeper +dimension. Be inclusive of hate also. + +What do I mean when I say this? Whenever there is something bad, whenever something +which you call bad, evil, happens, you never include it in yourself. Whenever something +good happens, you include it. If you are loving, you say, 'I am love.’ When you hate, you +never say, 'I am hate.’ When you have compassion, you say, 'I am compassion.’ When +you are angry, you never say, 'I am anger.’ You always say, 'I am angry’ — as if anger has + + + +happened to you; as if you are not anger — it is just a happening from outside, something +accidental. And when you say, 'I am love,' it seems something essential; not something +accidental that has happened to you, not something that has come from without. It is +coming from within. + +Whatsoever is good, you include it. And whatsoever is bad, you don't include it. + +Be inclusive of the bad also. Because you are hate, you are anger, and unless you feel this +deeply — that 'I am hate’ — you will never go beyond it. + +If you can feel, 'I am anger,’ a subtle process of transformation sets in immediately. What +happens when you say, 'I am anger’? Many things happen. First: when you say, 'I am +angry,’ you are different from the energy you call anger. This is not true, and from an +untrue base nothing true can happen. This is not true — this anger is you; this is your +energy. It is not something separate from you. + +You separate it because you create a false image of yourself — that you are never angry, +that you are never hateful, that you are always loving, that you are always kind and +sympathetic. You have created a false image of yourself. This false image is your ego. +This ego goes on saying to you, 'Cut anger, cut hate, they are not good.’ Not because you +know they are not good, but because they don’t give you the image; they don’t feed your +ego and your image. + +You are a good man, respectable, nice, cultured — you have an image. Sometimes you +fall down from the image — those are accidents. You regain your image again. Those are +not accidents. Really, they are more true about you. When you are angry, your true self is +revealed more truly than when you are smiling falsely. When you show your hate, you +are more authentic than when you pretend love. + + +The first thing is to be authentic, true. Include hate, include anger, include everything that +is in you. What will happen? If you include everything, your false image will fall forever, +and that’s very good. That’s just beautiful that you are relieved of the false image, because +it goes on creating complexities. With the image falling your ego will fall, which is a +door to spirituality. + +When you say, 'I am anger,’ how can you have your ego? When you say, 'I am hate, I am +jealousy, I am cruelty. I am violence,’ how can you have the ego? The ego can be had +easily when you say, 'I am Brahma. I am the supreme God.’ Then it is easy. 'I am atma, +the supreme self — then it is easy. But when you say, 'I am jealousy, hate, anger, passion, +sex,’ you cannot have the ego. With the false image the ego falls; you become true, +natural. Then it is possible to understand your reality. Then you can approach your anger +without any anti-attitude. It is you. You have to understand that it is your energy. + +And if you can be understanding about your anger, the very understanding changes and +transforms it. If you can understand the whole process of anger and hate, in the very +process of understanding it disappears, because a basic ingredient to be angry and to be +hateful is to be ignorant about it, to be unaware about it, to be unalert about it. So +whenever you are not alert, you can be angry. + +When you are alert, you cannot be angry. The alertness absorbs all energy which +becomes anger. + +Buddha has said again and again to his monks, 'I don’t say not to be angry. I say while +you are angry, be alert.’ This is really one of the fundamentals for mutation. 'I don’t say + + + +not to be angry. I say: while angry, be alert.' Try it. When anger comes, be alert. Look at +it. Observe it. Be conscious of it. Don’t be sleepy. And the more alert you are, the less +anger. In a moment when you are really alert, anger is not — the same energy becomes +alertness. + +Energy is neutral. The same energy becomes anger. The same energy becomes hate. The +same energy becomes love. The same energy becomes compassion. The energy is one; +these are all expressions. And there are basic situations in which energy can become a +particular mood. If you are unalert, energy can become anger, energy can become sex, +energy can become violence. If you are alert, it cannot become — the alertness, +awareness, consciousness, doesn't allow it to move in those grooves. It moves on a +different plane — the same energy. + +Buddha says, 'Walk, eat, sit. Whatsoever you do, do, but do fully conscious, mindful, +aware that you are doing it.’ + +Once it happened that Buddha was walking and a fly came and sat on his head, on his +forehead. He was talking to some monks, so without really paying any attention to the +fly, he just waved his hand and the fly left his forehead. + +Then he became aware that he had done something not fully aware, because his +awareness was towards the monks to whom he was talking, so he said to the monks, +'Excuse me for a single minute.’ He closed his eyes and he raised his hand again. The +monks were amazed at what he was doing, because now there was no fly. He raised his +hand again and waved his hand near the spot where the fly was — it was not there now. + +He brought his hand back and then he opened his eyes and said, 'You can ask now.’ + +But those monks said, 'We have forgotten what we were asking. Now we want to ask you +what you did. There was no fly — it was there previously — so what did you do?’ + +Buddha said, 'I did as I should have done before — fully consciously raising the hand. It +was not good of me. Something had been done unconsciously, automatically, robot-like.’ +Such alertness cannot become anger, such alertness cannot become hate — impossible. So +first include hate, anger, all that is thought to be bad. Include it in yourself, include it in +your image, so that your ego falls down. You come down on the ground from the sky. +You become true. + +Then don’t throw it on someone else. Let it be there; express it to the sky. Be fully alert. + +If you are angry, move in a room, be alone, and be angry and express your anger — and +be alert. Do whatsoever you would have done with the person who was instrumental. + +You can take his picture there, or just put a pillow there and say, 'You are my father,’ and +give a good beating. Be fully alert. Be fully alert about what you are doing, and do it. + +It will be a deep realization. The anger will be expressed, and you will be alert. And you +will be able to laugh; you will be able to know what stupid things you are doing. But you +could have done this to your real father — you are only doing it to the pillow. And if you +really do it authentically, you will feel very kindly, very loving towards your father. + +When you come out of the room and when you look at your father's face you will feel +very sympathetic, very loving. You would even like to ask him to forgive you. + +This is what I mean by being inclusive. No suppression is meant. Suppression is always +dangerous, poisonous. With whatsoever you suppress, you are creating inner complexes +which will continue and which will make you ultimately mad. Suppression is bound to +become madness. Express, but don’t express on anyone. There is no need. That is stupid, +and creates a vicious circle. Express alone meditatively, and be alert while expressing. + + + +THE END. + + + +Chapter 63: No map to follow + + +TOUCHING EYEBALLS AS A FEATHER, + +LIGHTNESS BETWEEN THEM OPENS INTO HEART +AND THERE PERMEATES THE COSMOS. + +KIND DEVI, + +ENTER ETHERIC PRESENCE + +PERVADING FAR ABOVE AND BELOW YOUR FORM. + +Once it happened in a church that after a very long dry sermon, the minister announced +that there would be a meeting, a brief meeting of the board, right after the benediction. +After the services a stranger approached the minister; he was the first man. The minister +thought, 'There has been some misunderstanding,’ because the man was absolutely a +stranger. He didn’t even look like a Christian; his appearance was that of a Mohammedan, +so the minister said, 'It seems you have misunderstood the announcement. There is going +to be a meeting of the board.’ + +The stranger said, 'So I have also heard — and if there was someone here more bored than +me then I would like to meet him.’ + +But this seems to be the situation of everyone. Look at people's faces, or at your own face +in a mirror, and you will feel you are the most bored, and it seems impossible that there +can be someone else who is more bored than you. The whole life seems to be a long +boredom — dry, dreary, meaningless; somehow you are carrying it as a burden. + +Why has this happened? Life is not meant to be a boredom. Life is not meant to be a +suffering. + +Life is a festival, a celebration, a peak of joy — but that is only in poetry, in dreams, in +philosophies. Sometimes a Buddha, a Krishna, appears to be in a deep celebration, but +they look like exceptions. Really, unbelievable; not readjust ideal. It seems they never +happen. They are our wish-fulfillments, myths, dreams and hopes, but not realities. The +reality seems to be our face — bored, in anguish, and with suffering impressed on it — and +the whole life is just a 'carrying on anyhow’. + +Why has this happened? And this must not be the basic reality of life, this cannot be, +because this happens only to man. The trees, the stars, the animals, the birds... nowhere +else does it happen. Except for man, no one is bored. And even if sometimes pain +happens, it is momentary; it never becomes an anguish. It never becomes a constant +obsession; it is not always on the mind. It is a momentary thing, an accident; it is not +carried over. + +Animals can be in pain, but they are not in suffering. Pain looks like an accident; they get +over it. They don’t carry it. It doesn’t become a wound. It is forgotten and forgiven. It +goes into the past; it never becomes a part of the future. When pain becomes a constant +thing, a wound, not an accident but a reality, essential, as if you cannot exist without it, +then it becomes a problem — and that problem has arisen only for the human mind. + + +Trees are not in suffering. There seems to be no anguish. Not that death doesn't occur to +them; death occurs, but it is not a problem. Not that painful experiences are not there; + + + +they are there, but they don't become life itself. Just on the periphery they happen and +disappear. Deep down in the inner core, life remains celebrating. + +A tree goes on celebrating. Death will happen, but it happens only once. It is not carried +over constantly. Except for man, everything is in a festive mood. Only man is bored — +boredom is a human phenomenon. What has gone wrong? Something must have gone +wrong. + +In a way this can be a good sign also. Boredom is human. You can define the human +being through boredom. Aristotle has defined the human being as rational. That may not +be exactly true; it is not a hundred percent true, because the difference is only of degree. +Animals are also rational — less rational, but not absolutely irrational. There are animals +which are just below the human mind. They too are rational in their own way; not as +much as man, but not completely devoid of reason. The difference is only of degrees, and +man cannot be defined by reason alone. But through boredom you can define him: he's +the only bored animal. + +And this boredom can come to such a climax that man can commit suicide. Only man can +commit suicide; no animal commits suicide. That is an absolutely human phenomenon. + +When boredom comes to such a point that even hope becomes impossible, then you drop +dead by yourself, because then there is no sense in carrying all this. You can carry this +boredom, this pain, because somewhere the tomorrow is yet hopeful. This is bad today, +but tomorrow something will happen. Because of that hope you go on carrying. + +I have heard, once it happened one Chinese emperor sentenced his prime minister to +death. The day the prime minister was to be hanged, the emperor came to see him to say +a good-bye. He had been his devoted servant for many many years, but he had done +something which irritated the emperor so much that he had sentenced him to death. But +remembering that this was going be the last day, the emperor came to meet him. + +When the emperor came, he saw the prime minister weeping, and tears were rolling down +from his eyes. He couldn't imagine that death could be the cause, because he was a brave +man, so he asked, 'It is impossible to imagine that you are weeping because you are +going to die this evening. It is impossible to conceive. You are a brave man, and I have +known your bravery so many times, so it must be something else. What is it? If I can do +something I will do it.’ + +The prime minister said, 'Now nothing can be done and it is of no use to say to you, but +if you insist, then I am still your servant — I will obey you and tell you.’ + + +The emperor insisted, so the prime minister said, 'It is not my death, because that is not +of much importance — man has to die one day; any day death will be — but I am weeping +because I have seen your horse standing outside.’ + +The emperor asked, 'Because of the horse? Why?’ + +The prime minister said, 'I was looking for my whole life for this type of horse, because I +have learned one ancient secret — that I can teach horses to fly — but only of a particular +type. This is the type, and this is my last day. I am not worried about my death, but just +that one ancient art will be lost with me. That’s why I am weeping.’ + +The emperor was thrilled, excited — if the horse could fly, this would be something — so +he said, 'How many days will it take?’ + +The prime minister said, 'At least one year — and then this horse will start flying.’ + +So the emperor said, 'Okay, for one year I will make you free, but remember, if in one + + + +year the horse is not flying, you will be again sentenced and hanged. But if the horse is +flying, you will be forgiven. And not only forgiven, I will give you half of my kingdom, +because I will be the first emperor in history who has a flying horse. So come out of the +jail and don’t weep.’ + +The prime minister rode, happy and laughing, on the horse to his house. But the wife was +still weeping and crying and she said, 'I have heard, the news has reached before you — +but one year only? And I know you know no art, and this horse cannot fly. + +This is just a trick, a deception, so if you could ask for one year why couldn’t you ask for +ten years?' + +The prime minister said, 'That would be too much. As it is, it is already too much. The +horse flying is already too much. Then asking for ten years would have been obviously a +trick. But don't weep.’ + +But the wife said, 'It makes me still more sad that now I will be living with you and after +one year you will be hanged. This one year is going to be a suffering.’ + +The prime minister said, 'Now I will tell you one ancient secret you don’t know. In this +one year the king can die, the horse can die, I can die. Or, who knows? — the horse can +learn to fly! One year!’ + +Just hope — and man lives through hope because he is so bored. When boredom comes to +a point where you cannot hope, when hopelessness is absolute, you commit suicide. +Boredom and suicide are both human. No animal can commit suicide, no tree can commit +suicide. + +Why has this happened? What is the reason behind it? Has man forgotten completely +how to live, how to celebrate, how to be festive? While the whole existence is festive, +how has man retreated out of it and created a sad milieu around him? + +It has happened. Animals live through instinct; they don’t live through awareness. They +live through instinct, mechanically. Nothing has to be learned. They are bom with +whatsoever they need to know. + +Their life runs on a smooth instinctive plane; there is no learning. They have an inbuilt +program, a blueprint in their cells, for all that they need to live and be happy, so they go +on living mechanically. + +Man has lost instinct; now there is no blueprint to live. You are born without any +blueprint, without any inbuilt program. No mechanical lines are available for you to +move on. You have to create your own path. You have to substitute instinct with +something which is not instinct, because instinct has dropped. You have to substitute +your instinct with intelligence, with awareness. You cannot live mechanically. You have +gone beyond that stage where mechanical life is possible — it is not possible for you. You +cannot live like animals and you don’t know how t live in some other way — this is the +problem. + +You don’t have a natural inbuilt program to follow. Without a program you have to face +existence. And boredom, suffering, is bound to be your destiny if you cannot create such +awareness that you can live through awareness rather than living through instinct. You +have to learn everything. This is the problem. No animal needs to learn anything. You +have to learn everything, and unless you learn it, you cannot live it. You have to learn +how to live. No animal needs it. + +This learning is the problem. You learn many things: you learn how to earn money, you +learn mathematics, you leam history, you learn science, but you never learn how to live. + + + +That is creating the boredom. The whole of humanity is bored because a basic thing +remains untouched. And it cannot be left to instinct, because there are now no instincts to +live. For man, instinct has dropped; that door is closed. You have to build your own +program. You are born without a map. + +This is good, because existence thinks you are so responsible you will create your own +map. This is a glory. This is magnificent. This makes man the highest, the peak of +existence, because existence leaves you free. No animal is free: he has to live and follow +a particular program that existence gives to him. When he is bom, he is born with a +program — he has to follow it. He cannot go astray, he cannot choose. There are no +alternatives given to him. For man, all alternatives are open, and with no map to move +with. + +If you don't leam how to live, your life will become a dreary affair. This has happened. +Then you can go on doing many things and still you will feel you are not alive — dead. +Deep down something is dead, not alive. You go on doing things because you have to. +Just to live you go on doing things, but that 'just to live’ is not life. There is no dance in +it, no song in it. It has become a business. There is no play in it, and obviously you +cannot enjoy it. These techniques of tantra are to teach you how to live. They are to teach +you not to depend on animal instinct, because it is no more there. + +It has become so faint it cannot work for you, it cannot function. + +It has been noted, observed, that if a human child is brought up without the mother, he +will never be able to learn love, he will never be able to love. For his whole life he will +remain without love, because now there is no instinct; he has to learn it. Even love has to +be learned. A human child who is brought up without love cannot learn it. He will not be +able to love. If a mother is not there, and if a mother doesn’t become a source of +happiness, of ecstasy, then no woman can become a source of happiness and ecstasy for +that child. When he becomes mature, grown-up, he will not be attracted to women, +because now instinct is not functioning. + +This will not happen to animals: in the right moment they will start functioning. They +will become sexual; they will move towards the opposite sex — that is instinctive, +mechanical. With man nothing is mechanical. If you don’t teach a human child language, +he will not leam it. If you don’t teach it, he is not going to have it. It is not natural; there +is no instinct for it. Whatsoever you are is because of your learning. Man is less nature +and more culture. Animals are simply nature. + +Man is less natural and more cultural, but one dimension, the basic and the most +foundational, remains uncultured — that is the dimension of being alive. You take it as if +you already have it; it is taken for granted — that is wrong. + +You don’t know how to live, because just to breathe is not synonymous with living. Just +to eat and sleep and just carry on the bodily affairs is not synonymous with living. You +are existing, that’s right, but you re not alive. + +A Buddha is alive, not simply existing. That aliveness can come only if you leam it, if +you become aware of it, and if you search for it and if you create situations in which it +can evolve. Remember this: for man, mechanical evolution is not. Conscious evolution +has taken place, and now you cannot do anything about it — you have to move into +conscious evolution. You cannot fall back. You can stick where you are — then you will +get bored. + +That’s what is happening. You are not moving. You go on accumulating physical things, + + + +so things are moving, not you. Your riches go on accumulating, they are growing — your +ha nk balance is growing, not you. You are not increasing at all. On the contrary, you may +be shrinking, decreasing, but you are not increasing. Unless you do something +consciously, you are lost. A conscious effort is needed. It is not asked from the animals +because they are not responsible. So you have to understand one very basic thing: with +freedom comes responsibility. And you can be free only if you are responsible. + +Animals are not responsible, but they are also not free. They are not free; they have to +follow a particular pattern. + +They are happy because nothing can go wrong. They are following a predetermined +course: they are following a pattern which has been worked out in millennia, in centuries +of evolution. It has been worked out and found correct. They are following that. There is +no possibility of going wrong. + +There is every possibility for you to go wrong, because there is no plan, there is no map, +there is no pattern. Your life ahead is not charted. You are free. But then a great +responsibility falls on you, and that responsibility is to choose rightly, to work rightly, +and to create your future through your effort. Really, the human being has to create +himself through his own effort. + +What existentialists in the west say is true. They say man is born without an essence, or +you can say without a soul. Sartre, Marcel, Heidegger, they say that man is born without +an essence. He is born as an existence, and then through his own effort he creates the +essence. He is born only as a possibility, and then through his own effort he creates the +soul. He is bom only as a form, and then through his own conscious effort he creates the +substance. + +Just the contrary is the case for all nature: every animal, every plant, is bom with an +essence, with a soul, with a program, with a fixed destiny. Man is born as an opening +with no fixed destiny — this creates burden, this creates responsibility. + +This gives you fear, anguish, anxiety. And then wherever you are, if you don't do +anything you get stuck. That getting stuck creates boredom. + +You can be alive, happy, festive, joyful, only when you are moving when you are +growing, when you are increasing, when you are creating the soul; really when you are +pregnant with the divine, and when the divine is growing in your womb, when you are +going to give birth. + +For tantra, God is not the beginning, God is in the end. God is not the creator, but the +ultimate peak, the omega point, of evolution. It is the last, not the first; not the alpha but +the omega. And unless you become pregnant and unless you carry a child within you, you +will be bored, because then your life is futile — nothing is going to come out of it; no fruit +is going to come out of it. That creates boredom. + +You can make this opportunity a source of evolution, or you can miss the opportunity and +can make it a point of suicide. It depends on you. + +Because man can commit suicide, only man can grow spiritually. No animal can grow +spiritually. Because man can destroy himself, he can also create. Remember, both the +possibilities move simultaneously. No animal can destroy himself — impossible. You +cannot conceive of a lion thinking about suicide, to jump from a cliff and end the whole +thing — no, impossible. No lion can think of it. Howsoever brave, no lion can think of +ending himself, destroying himself. + + + +He's not free. + +You can conceive of destroying yourself. It is impossible to find a human being who has +not thought many times to destroy himself. And if you can find a human being who has +not thought of committing suicide, then either he is animal or God. That is very basically +human — the possibility to destroy. But that also opens another door; simultaneously both +the doors open — you can create also. You can create yourself, because you can destroy +yourself. + +No animal can create himself. You can create yourself, and unless you start creating, you +will be destroying. Unless you create yourself, start creating.... And it is not a thing to +create yourself, it is a process — you have to go on creating. Unless you reach to the +ultimate, you have to go on creating. Unless the God is bom within you, you have to go +on creating. If you are not creating, you will be bored — uncreative life is boredom. All +these techniques are to help you to create, to be reborn, to become pregnant. Now I will +take the techniques. + +The first technique. This technique is very easy and really wonderful. You can do it, +anyone can do it. There is no question of type: anyone can do this technique, and for +everyone this will be helpful. Even if you cannot move very deeply in it, then too it will +be helpful. It will refresh you. + +Whenever you are bored, it will immediately refresh you. + +Whenever you are tired, it will immediately revitalize you. Whenever you are in a mood +where you feel fed up with the whole thing, immediately a new surge of energy will flow +within you. So for everyone, even if you are not meditation on it, it will be helpful, a +medical help. It will give you health. And it is very easy to do; no prerequisites. + +The sutra is: + +TOUCHING EYEBALLS AS A FEATHER, + +LIGHTNESS BETWEEN THEM OPENS INTO HEART +AND THERE PERMEATES THE COSMOS. + +Before entering the technique, some introductory remarks about it. First, something has +to be understood about the eye, because the whole technique depends on it. + +The first thing: whatsoever you are, whatsoever you appear from without, is false, but +you cannot deceive your eyes. You cannot create false eyes. You can create a false face; +you cannot falsify your eyes. That is impossible — unless you become a perfect master +like a Gurdjieff. Unless you become a perfect master of all your energies, you cannot +falsify your eyes. No ordinary human being can do that. You cannot falsify your eyes. +That's why if someone looks in your eyes, stares in your eyes, you feel offended, because +he is trying to find the real thing. And at that point you cannot do anything — your eyes +will reveal the true self. So it is not good manners to stare in anybody's eyes. + +Even while talking you go on avoiding the eyes. Unless you are in love with someone, +unless someone is ready to be true with you, you cannot stare. There is a limit. +Psychologists have observed that thirty seconds is the limit. With a stranger you can stare +for thirty seconds, not more. If you stare more, you have started being aggressive, and the +other will immediately start to feel uneasy. You can stare from a far-away point, because +then no one is aware. If you are a hundred feet away I can go on staring at you, but if you + + + +are just two feet away it becomes impossible. + +In a crowded train, or in a crowded elevator, sitting or standing just close together, you +never look at each other's eyes. You can touch the body — that is not so offensive — but +you never look into each other's eyes because that will be too much, too near, and you +will penetrate the real man. The first thing to remember: eyes have no personality. They +are pure nature. They have no personality. + +The second thing to remember: you move into the world almost only through the eyes; +they say eighty percent. Those who have been working with eyes, the psychologists, they +say that eighty percent of contact with the world is through the eyes. Eighty percent of +your life moves out through the eyes. + +That's why whenever you see a blind man, you feel pity. You never feel so much pity and +sympathy when you see a deaf man, but when you see a blind man, suddenly you feel +sympathy and compassion. + +Why? — because he is eighty percent non-alive. A deaf man is not so non-alive. Even if +your feet are cut and your hands are cut, you will not be so unalive, but a blind man is +eighty percent closed; he lives only twenty percent. + +Through your eyes eighty percent of your energy moves out. You are moving into the +world through the eyes. So when you get tired, the first thing is the eyes. Later on, other +parts of the body will be affected; the eyes will be the first to be drained of energy. If you +can refresh your eyes, you can refresh your whole body, because they are eighty percent +of your energy. If you can revitalize your eyes, you have revitalized yourself. + +In a natural surrounding you never feel as tired as you feel in an unnatural city, because +in a natural surrounding your eyes are continuously fed. The greenery, the fresh +atmosphere — everything relaxes your eyes and feeds them. In a modern city everything +exploits your eyes and nothing feeds them. So move to a remote village, or to a hilltop +where nothing artificial is in the milieu, where everything is natural, and you will see a +different type of eyes. The twinkling, the quality, will be different — fresh, animal-like, +penetrating, alive, dancing. + +In a modern city, eyes are dead; just living on the minimum. They don’t know what +festivity is. They don’t know what freshness is. The eyes are unaware of any life flowing +through them; they are just being exploited. + +Eighty percent of your energy moves from your eyes, so you have to be perfectly aware, +and you have to learn an art about this movement, this energy, and the possibility of the +eyes. + +In India we have been calling blind men PRAJNA-CHAKSHU — wisdom-eye — for a +particular reason, because every misfortune can be transfonned into a great opportunity. +Eighty percent of the energy moves through the eyes, and when a person is blind, he is +eighty percent not alive; with the world eighty percent of his contact is lost. + +He is very poor as far as the world without is concerned, but if he can use this +opportunity — this opportunity of being blind — then he can use this eighty percent of his +energy for his inner world; this eighty percent that you cannot use ordinarily unless you +know the art. So eighty percent of his energy is with him, it is a reservoir, and the energy +that normally moves out can move within. If he knows how to allow it to move within, he +will become a wisdom-eye. + +A blind man is not a PRAJNA-CHAKSHU, a wisdom-eye, just by being blind, but he can +be. He doesn’t have ordinary eyes, but he can get the eyes of wisdom. The possibility is + + + +there. We named him PRAJNA-CHAKSHU just to make him aware that he should not be +sorry that he doesn't have eyes. He can create an inner eye, and eighty percent of energy +is with him which is not with those who have eyes. + +He can move it. He can use it. + +Even if the blind man is not aware, he becomes more silent than you are. He becomes +more relaxed. Look at a blind man. He is more silent. His face is more relaxed. He seems +to be at ease with himself; no discontent. This will not be the case with a deaf man. He +will be more restless than you, and he will become cunning. But a blind man is never +cunning, never restless, never calculative; basically trusting, in a deep faith with +existence. + +Why does this happen? — because the eighty percent of energy, even if he doesn’t know +anything about it, is moving within. It becomes a constant fall, just like a waterfall. Even +unaware, it goes on falling on his heart. The same energy that moves out, goes on falling +on his heart — that changes the quality of his being. In ancient India the blind man was +very much respected — very much respected. In deep respect we called him PRAJNA- +CHAKSHU, wisdom-eye. + +The same you can do with your eyes, and this technique is for that: to help your energy +which moves out to fall back upon yourself, upon your own heart center. If it falls on the +heart, you become as light as possible. You feel as if the whole body has become a +feather; as if gravitation has absolutely no effect on it. And immediately you are +connected with the deepest source of your being, which revitalizes you. + +For tantra, deep sleep revitalizes you not because of sleep, but just because the energy +which was moving out, moves in. + +If you know the secret, then what an ordinary man is doing in six hours or eight hours +sleep, you can do within minutes. What an ordinary man is doing in eight hours, really he +is not doing. He is allowing nature to do something, and he is not aware of what it is. A +mysterious process is happening in your sleep. One of the basic things is that your energy +is not moving out; it goes on falling on your heart, and that revitalizes you. You are in a +deep bath with your own energy. + +Something more about this moving energy. You might have observed that whenever +there is a dominant man, he always stares in your eyes. Whenever there is a dominated +man, he looks down. Slaves, servants, or anyone who is inferior to someone, will never +stare in the eyes of the superior. But the superior can stare. Kings can stare, but standing +before a king, standing in the audience of the king, you are not supposed to stare. That +would be an offence. You have to look down. + +Really, with your eyes your energy moves. It can become a subtle violence. And not only +in man, even in animals. When two strangers meet, two animals meet, they stare each +other in the eye just to judge who is going to be the superior and who is going to take the +role of the inferior. And once one animal looks down, the thing is decided. Then they will +not fight; the thing is over. It is now taken for granted who is superior. + + +Even children play the game of staring into each other's eyes, and whoever looks away is +defeated. And they are right. When two children stare into each other's eyes, whosoever +becomes first uncomfortable and starts fidgeting and starts looking away and avoiding +the look of the other, is defeated. The one who goes on staring is stronger. If your eyes + + + +can defeat the other's eyes, it is a subtle indication that you are stronger than the other. + +On the stage when someone comes to speak or to act, he becomes very afraid, a great +trembling happens. Even with those who are long in the profession, old actors... even +when they come on the stage a fear grips them, because so many eyes are staring; there is +so much aggressive energy. There is so much energy from the thousands of people +staring at them that they suddenly start trembling deep down. A fear grips them. A subtle +energy is flowing through the eyes, a very subtle energy. The subtlest, the most refined of +physical forces, is flowing through the eyes. And the quality of the energy changes with +you. + +From the eyes of a Buddha a different type of energy is flowing. From the eyes of a +Hitler a totally different type. If you look at Buddha’s eyes, they accept you, they +welcome you, they become a door. If you look at Hitler's eyes, they reject you, they +condemn you, they push you away, they throw you away. For Hitler, his eyes are like +weapons; for Buddha, his eyes are compassion. + +The quality of the eyes changes. Sooner or later we must come to measure the eye- +energy, and then there will be no need to know much about the man. Just the eye-energy +and its quality will show what type of man is hidden behind. Sooner or later that will be +possible. + +This sutra, this technique: + +TOUCHING EYEBALLS AS A FEATHER, + +LIGHTNESS BETWEEN THEM OPENS INTO HEART +AND THERE PERMEATES THE COSMOS. + +TOUCHING EYEBALLS AS A FEATHER... Use both your palms, put them on your +eyes, and allow the palms to touch the eyeballs — but just like a feather, with no pressure. +If you press you miss the point, you miss the whole technique. Don’t press; just touch like +a feather. You will have to adjust, because in the beginning you will be pressing. Put less +and less pressure until you are just touching with no pressure at all — just your palms +touch the eyeballs. Just a touch, just a meeting with no pressure, because if the pressure is +there, then the technique will not function. So — LIKE A FEATHER. + +Why? Because a needle can do something which a sword cannot do. If you press, the +quality has changed — you are aggressive. And the energy that is flowing through the +eyes is very subtle: a small pressure and it starts fighting and a resistance is created. If +you press, then the energy that is flowing through the eyes will start a resistance, a fight; +a struggle will ensue. + +So don't press; even a slight pressure is enough for the eye-energy to judge. + +It is very subtle, it is very delicate. Don’t press — like a feather, just your palm is +touching, as if not touching. Touching as if not touching, no pressure; just a touch, a +slight feeling that the palm is touching the eyeball, that's all. + +What will happen? When you simply touch without any pressure, the energy starts +moving within. If you press, it starts fighting with the hand, with the palm, and moves +out. Just a touch and the energy starts moving within. The door is closed; simply the door +is closed and the energy falls back. The moment energy falls back, you will feel a +lightness coming all over your face, your head. This energy moving back makes you + + + +light. + +And just between these two eyes is the third eye, the wisdom-eye, the PRAJNA- +CHAKSHU. Just between these two eyes is the third eye. The energy falling back from +the eyes hits the third eye. That's why one feels light, levitating, as if there is no +gravitation. And from the third eye the energy falls on the heart. It is a physical process: +just drip, drip, it drops, and you will feel a very light feeling entering in your heart. The +heartbeats will slow down, the breathing will slow down. Your whole body will feel +relaxed. + +Even if you are not entering deep meditation, this will help you physically. Any time in +the day, relax on a chair — or if you don’t have any chair, when just sitting in a train — +close your eyes, feel a relaxed being in the whole of your body, and then put both your +palms on your eyes. + +But don’t press — that's the very significant thing. Just touch like a feather. + +When you touch and don’t press, your thoughts will stop immediately. In a relaxed mind +thoughts cannot move; they get frozen. They need frenzy and fever, they need tension to +move. They live through tension. When the eyes are silent, relaxed, and the energy is +moving backwards, thoughts will stop. You will feel a certain quality of euphoria, and +that will deepen daily. + +So do it many times in the day. Even for a single moment, touching will be good. +Whenever your eyes feel exhausted, dry of energy, exploited — after reading, seeing a +film, or watching TV — whenever you feel it, just close the eyes and touch. Immediately +there will be the effect. But if you want to make it a meditation, then do it for at least +forty minutes. And the whole thing is not to press. Because it is easy for a single moment +to have a feather-like touch; it is difficult for forty minutes. Many times you will forget +and you will start pressing. + +Don’t press. For forty minutes, just remain aware that your hands have no weight; they +are just touching. Go on being aware that you are not pressing, only touching. This will +become a deep awareness, just like breathing. As Buddha says to breathe with full +awareness, the same will happen with touching, because you have to be constantly +mindful that you are not pressing. + +Your hand should just be a feather, a weightless thing, simply touching. + +Your mind will be totally there, alert, near the eyes, and the energy will be flowing +constantly. In the beginning it will be just dropping in drops. Within months you will feel +it has become a river-like thing, and within a year you will feel it has become a flood. + +And when it happens - TOUCHING EYEBALLS AS A FEATHER, LIGHTNESS +BETWEEN THEM — when you touch you will feel lightness. You can feel it right now. +Immediately, the moment you touch, a lightness comes. And that LIGHTNESS +BETWEEN THEM OPENS INTO THE HEART; that lightness penetrates, opens into the +heart. In the heart, only lightness can enter; nothing heavy can enter. Only very light +things can happen to the heart. + +This lightness between the two eyes will start dropping into the heart, and the heart will +open to receive it - AND THERE PERMEATES THE COSMOS. And as the falling +energy becomes a stream and then a river and then a flood, you will be washed +completely, washed away. You will not feel that you are. You will feel simply the +cosmos is. Breathing in, breathing out, you will feel you have become the cosmos. The +cosmos comes in and the cosmos goes out. The entity that you have always been, the ego, + + + +will not be there. + +This technique is very simple, without any danger, so you can experiment with it as you +like. But because it is so easy, you may not be able to do it. + +The whole thing depends on touch without pressure, so you will have to leam it. Try it. +Within a week it will happen. Suddenly some day when you are just touching with no +pressure, immediately you will feel what I am saying — a lightness and an opening in the +heart, and something dropping from the head into the heart. + +The second technique: + +KIND DEVI, + +ENTER ETHERIC PRESENCE + +PERVADING FAR ABOVE AND BELOW YOUR FORM. + +KIND DEVI, ENTER ETHERIC PRESENCE PERVADING FAR ABOVE AND +BELOW YOUR FORM. The second can be done only if you have done the first. It can +be done separately also, but then it will be very difficult. But if you do the first, then it is +good to do the second and very easy. + +Whenever this happens — that you feel light, levitating, as if you can fly — suddenly you +will become aware that around your body fonn there is a bluish light. But that you can +see only when you feel that you can levitate, that your body can fly, that it has become +light, completely free of any burden, completely free of any gravitation towards the earth. +Not that you can fly; that is not the point. Sometimes it happens. Sometimes it happens +that it comes to such a balancing point that your body goes up. But that is not the goal, +and don’t think about it at all. This much will do: if you feel with closed eyes that your +body has gone up. + +When you open your eyes you will see you are just sitting on the ground, so don’t become +worried about it. If with closed eyes you feel as if your body has gone up and you feel +there is no weight to it, this is enough. + +For meditation this is enough. But if you are trying to learn levitation, then it is not +enough. But I am not interested in that, and I will not tell you anything about it. This +much is enough — that you feel that your body has no weight, it has become weightless. +Whenever you feel this weightlessness, just with closed eyes become aware of the fonn +of your body. Just with closed eyes, feel your toes and their form, and the legs and their +form, and then the form of the whole body. If you are sitting in siddhasana, just like a +Buddha, then feel the form while sitting like a Buddha. Just inside try to feel the form of +your body. It will become apparent, it will appear before you, and you will +simultaneously become aware that just around the fonn there is a bluish light. + +Do it with closed eyes in the beginning. And when this light goes on spreading and you +feel an aura, a bluish aura, all around the fonn, then sometimes while doing it in the night +with no light in a dark room, open your eyes and you will see it exactly around your body +— a bluish form, just light, blue light, all around your body. If you want to see it actually, +not with closed eyes but with open eyes, do it in a dark room with no light at all. + + +This bluish fonn, this bluish light, is the presence of the etheric body. You have many + + + +bodies. This technique is concerned with the etheric body, and through the etheric body +you can enter into the highest ecstasy. There are seven bodies, and every body can be +used to enter into the divine; every body is just a door. + +This technique uses the etheric body, and the etheric body is the easiest to realize. The +deeper the body, the more difficult; but the etheric body is just near you, just near the +physical. It is just near. The second form is of the etheric — just around you, just around +your body. It penetrates your body and it is also around your body just like a hazy light, a +blue light, hanging all around like a loose robe. + +KIND DEVI, + +ENTER ETHERIC PRESENCE + +PERVADING FAR ABOVE AND BELOW YOUR FORM. + +Far above, below — everywhere around your form. If you can see that blue light around +you, thinking will stop immediately, because for the etheric body, no thinking is needed. +And the blue light is so calming, so soothing, so relaxing. Even ordinarily blue light is so +soothing. Why? — because it is the light of your etheric body. The blue sky is so +soothing. Why? — because it is the color of your etheric body. And the etheric body is +very soothing. + +Whenever someone loves you, whenever someone touches you with deep love, he +touches your etheric body. + +That's why you feel it as such a soothing thing. It has even been photographed. Two +lovers in deep love, making love: if their intercourse can continue for a certain limit, +beyond forty minutes, and there is no ejaculation, around both the bodies, deep in love, a +blue light appear. It has even been photographed. + +And sometimes there have been very strange phenomena, because this light is a very +subtle electric force. All around the world, many times it has happened that a new couple, +staying in a new room on their honeymoon, or on their first night when they don’t know +each other's body and they don't know what is possible.... If both the bodies are in a +certain vibration of love, of attraction, of deep involvement and commitment — open, +vulnerable to each other, ready to become one space — then sometimes it has happened +accidentally that their bodies have become so electrified, their etheric body becomes so +alive, that things in the room start falling. + +Very strange phenomena: a statue is there on the table — suddenly it falls down. The +glass on the table suddenly breaks. There is no one else, only the couple making love, +and they have not even touched the glass. Or suddenly something catches fire. These +cases have been reported to many police stations all around the world, and much +investigation has been done, and then it was found that two persons in deep love can +create such an electric force that it may affect things around them. + + +That force also comes through the etheric body. Your etheric body is your electric body. +Whenever you are overflowing with energy, you have a bigger range to your etheric +body. Whenever you are sad, depressed, you don't have any etheric body near your body. +It recedes back into the body. So with a sad person, depressed person, you will also feel +sad. If a really sad person enters in this room, you will feel that something has gone +wrong, because his etheric body affects you immediately. He becomes an exploiter, + + + +because his own etheric forces are so depressed they start feeding on others. + +A sad person will make you sad, a depressed person will make you depressed, an ill +person will make you ill, because it is not only that which you see that he is; something +hidden is constantly working. Even if he has not said anything, even if he is smiling +outwardly, if he is depressed he will exploit you. Your etheric body will lose its energy — +he will exploit, he will feed on you. When someone is happy and he enters, immediately +you feel a happiness around you, because he is throwing so much etheric force. He is +really giving you a feast; he is feeding you. He has so much he is overflowing. + +When a Buddha moves around, or a Christ, or a Krishna, they are constantly giving you a +feast, constantly you are guests. And when you come after seeing a Buddha, you feel so +refreshed, so alive, so vitalized, so rejuvenated. + +What has happened? Buddha may not have said anything. Even a darshan, just a look, +and you feel something has changed within you, something has entered within you. + +What is entering? He is so overflowing with his energy.... And whosoever is at peace +with himself is always overflooded, because his energy is not wasted in unnecessary +nonsense in which you are wasting your energy. He is always overflooded, and +whosoever comes can take. Jesus says, 'Come unto me. If you are heavily burdened, +come unto me. I will unburden you.’ Really he is not doing anything; it is just his +presence. + +It is said that whenever a god-man, a teerthankara, an avatar, a Christ, moves on the +earth, around him a particular milieu is created. Jain yogis have even measured it. They +say it is twenty-four miles. Twenty-four miles is the radius around a teerthankara, and for +twenty-four miles in the whole radius everyone is flooded with his energy: knowing, not +knowing, friend or enemy, following him or opposing him, it makes no difference. + +If following, you are flooded more, because you are more open; if opposing, you are +flooded, but not so much because you are closed — but the energy is flooding. A single +man is such a reservoir; a single man, if undisturbed, silent, at ease, at home, is such a +reservoir that for twenty-four miles around him in all directions a milieu is created. + +And in that milieu you are on a constant feast. + +This happens through the astral body. The astral body is your electric body. The body +that we see is the physical, the material. This is not really life. Life comes to this body +because of the electric, the etheric body. That is your prana, that is your vitality. + +So Shiva says: + +KIND DEVI, + +ENTER ETHERIC PRESENCE... + +First you will have to become aware of the fonn that surrounds your physical form, and +when you have become aware, then help it to grow, help it to increase and expand. What +can you do? + +Just sitting silently, looking at it; not doing anything, just looking at the bluish form +around you; not doing anything, just looking at it, you will feel it is increasing, spreading, +becoming bigger and bigger. Because when you are not doing anything, the whole energy +goes to the etheric. Remember this. When you are doing anything, the energy is taken out +of the etheric. + +Lao Tzu says, 'Non-doing, no one is stronger than me. Not doing anything at all, and no + + + +one is stronger than me. Those who are strong by doing can be defeated.’ Says Lao Tzu, + +'I cannot be defeated, because my energy comes from non-doing.’ So the secret is not +doing anything. + +What was Buddha doing under the Bodhi tree? — not doing anything. He was not doing +in that moment. He was not. + +Just sitting he achieved the ultimate. It looks puzzling. We are doing so much effort and +nothing is achieved, and Buddha was not doing anything under the Bodhi tree and he +achieved the ultimate. + +When you are not doing anything, your energy is not moving out. It goes to the etheric. It +is accumulated there. Your etheric body becomes an electric reservoir. And the more it +grows, the more you become silent. The more you become silent, the more it grows. And +once you know how to give energy to the etheric body and how not to waste it +unnecessarily, you have come to realize, you have come to know about a secret key. + +Then you can be festive. Really, only then can you be festive. As you are now, drained of +energy, how can you be festive? How can you celebrate? How can you blossom? Flowers +are part of the luxury. When the tree is overflowing with energy, then flowers come. +Flowers are always luxury. + +If the tree is starved, flowers won’t come, because even for the leaves there is not enough +food. There is a hierarchy: first the roots will be fed, because they are the most basic. If +they disappear, then there is no possibility for the flowers. Then the trunk will be fed, +then the branches will be fed. If everything goes okay and energy is still there, then the +leaves will be fed, and if still the food is there and the tree is totally satisfied and no food +is needed, no energy is needed to exist and survive, suddenly it blooms. + +The overflowing energy becomes flowers. Flowers are a feast for others. It is a +presentation. It is a gift from the tree to you. + +And the thing happens in man also. A Buddha is a tree which has flowered. Now the +energy is so overflowing that he has invited all and sundry to come and share. + +First try the first technique and then try the second. You can do it separately also, but it +will be more difficult to realize the bluish fonn of the ethereal body. + + +THE END. + + + +Chapter 64: Choicelessness is bliss + + +Question 1 + +IS IT THAT THERE ARE ONLY TWO ALTERNATIVES BEFORE MAN - A LIFE +OF ABIDING SORROW AND SUFFERING OR ONE OF DIVINITY AND BLISS - +AND THIS CHOICE LIES WITH HIM? HOW IS IT THAT MOST HAVE CHOSEN +THE PATH OF SORROW AND SUFFERING? + +It is a very significant question, but very delicate also. The first thing to be understood is +that life is very paradoxical, and because of that many things happen. These are the two +alternatives: either man can be in heaven or hell. And there is no third possibility. Either +you can be in deep suffering, or you can be without suffering and in deep bliss. These are +the only two possibilities, two openings, two doors, two modes of being. + +Then the question necessarily arises why man chooses to be in suffering. Man never +chooses to be in suffering, man always chooses to be in bliss — and there comes the +paradox. If you choose to be in bliss, you will be in suffering, because to be in bliss +means to be choiceless. This is the problem. If you choose to be in bliss you will be in +suffering. If you don't choose, if you simply remain a witness, non-choosing, you will be +in bliss. So it is not a question of choosing between bliss and suffering; deep down it is a +question of choosing between choosing and non-choosing. + +Why does it happen that whenever you choose you are in suffering? — because choice +divides life: something has to be cut and thrown away. + +You don’t accept the total. You accept something in it and you deny something, that's +what choice means. And life is a totality. If you choose something and deny something, +that which you deny will come to you, because life cannot be divided. And that which +you deny, just because you deny it, becomes a powerful thing over you. You really +become afraid of it. + +Nothing can be denied. You can only close your eyes to it. You can only escape. You can +become inattentive towards it, but it is always there hidden, waiting for the moment to +assert. So if you deny suffering — if you say you are not going to choose suffering — then +in a subtle you have chosen it. Now it will always be around you. One thing. + +Life is totality — the first thing; and life is change — the second thing. These are basic +truths. You cannot divide life. Secondly: nothing is stagnant, and nothing can be. So +when you say, T am not going to suffer. I am going to choose a blissful mode of living,’ +you will cling to happiness. And whenever you cling to something, you want it, you hope +it to be permanent. And nothing can be permanent in life. Life is a flux. + +So when you cling to happiness, you are again creating suffering, because this happiness +will pass away; nothing can remain. It is a river, and the moment you cling to a river, you +are creating a situation in which you will be frustrated, because the river will move. + +Sooner or later you will find that the river has gone far away. It is not now with you: your +hands are empty and your heart is frustrated. + +If you cling to bliss, there will be moments of bliss, but they are going to pass away. Life +is a flux. Nothing can be permanent here except you. Except you, nothing is eternal here, +and if you cling to a changing thing, when it is gone you will suffer. And it is not only +that when it is gone you will suffer; if you have the mind of clinging, while it is there you + + + +will not be able to enjoy it, because you will be constantly afraid that it is going to be +lost. + +If you cling you will miss the opportunity also. Later on you will suffer and right now +you will not enjoy, because the fear is just around the corner — sooner or later it has to +go. The guest has come to your house, and you know he is a guest and tomorrow morning +he will leave. You start suffering for the future — tomorrow morning he will leave — and +that pain, that suffering, that anguish, comes upon you right now. You cannot be happy +while the guest is in your home. While the guest is with you, you cannot be happy +because you are already in anxiety and anguish that tomorrow morning he will leave. So +while he is there you will not be happy, and when he is gone you will be unhappy. This is +what is happening. + +The first thing: life cannot be divided. If you divide, only then can you choose. + +And that which you choose is flux-like — sooner or later ut will be gibe — and that which +you have denied will fall over you; you cannot escape it. You cannot say, 'I will live only +in the days and I will escape the nights.’ You cannot say, 'I will live only with the +ingoing breath and I will not allow the outgoing breaths.’ + +Life is a rhythm of opposites. The breath comes in and goes out: between these two +opposites — ingoing and outgoing — you exist. Suffering is there, happiness is there. +Happiness is just like the ingoing breath, suffering is just like the outgoing breath; or day +and night — the rhythm of opposites. You cannot say, 'I will live only if I am happy. +When I am not happy, I will not live.’ You can take this attitude, but this attitude will +make you suffer more. + +No one chooses suffering, remember. You ask why man has chosen to suffer. No one has +chosen to suffer. You have chosen not to suffer, you have chosen to be happy, and you +have chosen strongly. You are doing everything to be happy and that’s why you are in +suffering, why you are not happy. + +So what is to be done? Remember that life is total. You cannot choose — the whole life +has to be lived. There will be moments of happiness and there will be moments of +suffering, and both have to be lived; you cannot choose. Because life is both — otherwise +the rhythm will be lost, and without rhythm there will be no life. + + +It is just like music. You hear some music: there are notes, sounds, and after each sound +there is silence, a gap. Because of that gap, that interval of silence, and the sound — +because of both the opposites — music is created. If you say, 'I will choose only sounds +and I am not going to take the gaps,’ there will be no music. It will be a monotonous +thing, it will be dead. Those gaps give life to sound. This is the beauty of life — that +through opposites it exists. Sound and silence, sound and silence — that creates music, the +rhythm. The same is with life. Suffering and happiness are two opposites. You cannot +choose. + +If you choose you have become a victim; you will suffer. If you become aware of this +totality of the opposites and the way that life functions, you don’t choose — the first thing. +And when you don’t choose there is no need to cling, there is no meaning in clinging. +When suffering conies you enjoy the suffering, and when happiness comes you enjoy the +happiness. When the guest is at home you enjoy him, when he has gone you enjoy the +suffering, the absence, the pain. I say enjoy both. This is the path of wisdom: enjoy both, +don’t choose. Whatsoever falls upon you, accept it. It is your fate, it is how life is, and + + + +nothing can be done about it. + +If you take this attitude, there is no choosing. You have become choiceless. And when +you are choiceless, you will become aware of yourself, because now you are not worried +about what happens, so you are not outgoing. + +You are not worried about what is happening around you. Whatsoever happens you will +enjoy it, you will live it, you will go through it, you will experience it, and you will gain +something out of it, because every experience is an expansion of consciousness. + +If there is really no suffering you will be poor for it, because suffering gives you depth. A +man who has not suffered will always remain on the surface. Suffering gives you depth. +Really, if there is no suffering you will be saltless. You will be nothing, just a boring +phenomenon. Suffering gives you tone, a keenness. A quality comes to you which only +suffering can give, which no happiness can give. A man who has remained always in +happiness, in comfort, who has not suffered, will not have any tone. He will be just a +lump of being. There cannot be any depth. Really, there cannot be any heart. The heart is +created through suffering; through pain you evolve. + +If a man has only suffered and he has not known any happiness, then too he will not be +rich, because richness comes through opposites. The more you move in opposites, the +higher, the deeper you evolve. A man who has simply suffered will become a slave. He +who has not known any moments of happiness will not be really alive. He will become an +animal; he will just exist anyhow. There will be no poetry, no song in the heart, no hope +in the eyes. He will settle down to his pessimistic existence. + +There will be no struggle, no adventure. He will not move. He will be simply a stagnant +pool of consciousness, and a stagnant pool of consciousness is not conscious — by and by +he will become unconscious. That's why if there is too much pain you fall unconscious. + +So just happiness will not be of much help, because there will be no challenge. Just pain +will not be of much growth, because there will be nothing to struggle, to hope, to dream; +there will be no fantasy. Both are needed, and life exists between both as a very delicate +tension, a subtle tension. + +If you understand this, then you don't choose. Then you know how life functions, how +life is. This is the way, this is the way of life — it moves through happiness, it moves +through suffering and gives you tone, and gives you meaning, and gives you depth. So +both are good. + +I say both are good. I don’t say choose between the two — I say both are good, don’t +choose. Rather, enjoy both; rather, allow both to happen. Be open without any resistance. +Don't cling to one and don’t resist the other. + +Let no-resistance be your motto: I will not resist life. Whatsoever life gives to me, I will +be ready to take it, available, and I will enjoy it. The nights are also good and beautiful, +and suffering has a beauty of its own. No happiness can have that beauty. Darkness has +its own beauty; day has its own beauty. + +There is no comparison and there is no choice. Both have their own dimensions to work +in. + +The moment this consciousness arises in you, you will not choose. You will be just a +witness, and you will enjoy — this choicelessness will become bliss. This choicelessness +will become bliss. Bliss is not contrary to suffering; bliss is a quality which you can bring +to anything whatsoever — even to suffering. + + + +A Buddha cannot suffer, but that doesn’t mean that suffering doesn’t happen to him. +Remember, suffering happens as much to Buddha as it happens to you, but he cannot +suffer because he knows the art of enjoying it. He cannot suffer because he remains +blissful. Even in suffering he remains festive, meditative, alive, enjoying, open, non- +resistant. Suffering happens to him, but he is not touched. Suffering comes and goes, just +like a breath coming in and going out. He remains himself. The suffering cannot push +him aside. The suffering cannot push him off his feet. Nothing can push him — neither +suffering nor happiness. You exist like a pendulum: everything pushes you — everything. +You cannot even be really happy, because happiness will also kill you. You get so +involved in it. + +I remember, once it happened that a poor schoolmaster — very old, poor, retired — won a +lottery. The wife was afraid and she thought, 'This is going to be too much for the old +man. + +Five thousand dollars is too much for him. Even a five dollar note gives him so much +happiness, so five thousand dollars may kill him.’ + +She ran to the church, to the nearby church, and went to the priest and told him what had +happened. She said, 'The old man is out, but he is just coming back, this is his time to +return, so do something. Five thousand dollars — just the news will kill him!’ + +The priest said, 'Don’t be afraid. 1 kn ow the human mind and the way it functions. I know +the psychology. 1 will come.’ + +So the priest came to the house. The moment they arrived the old man also arrived, so the +priest started. He said, 'Suppose you won a lottery of five thousand dollars — what would +you do?’ + +The old man thought about it, pondered over it, and he said, '1 would give half of the +money to the church.’ + +The priest fell down dead, ft was too much. + +Even happiness will kill you, because you get so involved. You cannot remain out of +anything. Suffering or happiness, whatsoever comes to your door, you get so involved in +it you are just pushed off your feet. You are no more there. Just a breeze comes in the +house and you are no more there. + +What I am saying is that if you don’t choose, if you remain alert and aware that this is +how life is — days and nights come and go, suffering and happiness — you just witness. +There is no clinging to happiness, no hankering for happiness, and no escape from +suffering. + +You remain in yourself — centered, rooted. This is what bliss is. + +So remember, bliss is not something opposite to suffering. Don’t think that when you +become blissful there will be no suffering — nonsense. Suffering is part of life. It ceases +only when you are not. When you completely disappear from the body, suffering ceases. +When there is no birth, suffering ceases. But then you are lost in the totality, then you are +no more — just a drop has fallen into the ocean and is no more. + +While you are, suffering will continue. It is part of life. But you can become aware: then +suffering happens somewhere around you, but it never happens to you. But then +happiness also never happens to you. Don’t think that happiness will go on happening to +you and suffering will not happen — both will not happen to you. They will just happen +around, just on the periphery, and you will be centered in yourself. You will see them +happening, you will enjoy them happening, but they will happen around you; they will + + + +not happen to you. + +This becomes possible if you don't choose. That’s why I said this is delicate, subtle. +Because of the paradoxical life, you choose happiness and you fall in suffering. You try +to escape from suffering, and more and more suffering is invited. So you can take it as an +ultimate law: whatsoever you choose, the opposite will be your fate, say it as an ultimate +law: whatsoever you choose, the opposite will be your fate. + + +So whatsoever is your fate, remember, you have chosen it by choosing the opposite. If +you are suffering, you have chosen your suffering by choosing happiness. Don’t choose +happiness and suffering disappears. Don’t choose at all. Then nothing can happen to you, +and everything is a flux except you. That has to be understood very deeply. + +Only you are the constant factor in existence, nothing else. Only you are the eternity, +nothing else. Your awareness is never a flux. Suffering comes, you witness it. Then +happiness comes, you witness it. Then nothing comes, you witness it. Only one thing +remains constant — witnessing — and witnessing is you. + +You were a child.... Or, if you move even further backwards, once you were just an +atomic cell. You cannot even imagine it — just an atomic cell in your mother's womb, not +even visible to the naked eyes. If that cell comes before you and you encounter it, you +will not be able to recognize that once you were that. Then you were a child, then you +became young, and now you are old, or lying on your deathbed. Many things happened. +Your whole life has been a flux; nothing remained the same for even two moments. +Heraclitus says you cannot step twice in the same river — and this he says for the river of +life. You cannot have two similar moments. The moment that has gone cannot be +repeated. It is gone forever; you cannot have it again. + +The same cannot exist. In such a great flux, only one thing within you remains the same +— the witnessing. + +If you could have witnessed in your mother's womb, the quality of consciousness would +have been the same. If you could have witnessed when you were a child, the quality of +witnessing would have been the same. Young or dying, while just dying on your bed, if +you can witness, the quality of consciousness will be the same. + +The only one thing deep down within you is your witnessing self, your consciousness — +that remains the same; everything else changes. And if you cling to any object of the +world of change, you will suffer. Nothing can be done about it. You are trying to do the +impossible, that's why you suffer. I know you never choose, but that is not the point. If +you suffer, you have chosen it indirectly. + +Once you become aware of this indirectness of life, this paradoxical quality of life, you +will stop choosing. When choice falls, the world has disappeared. When choosing falls, +you have entered the absolute. + +But that is possible only when the choosing mind disappears completely. A choiceless +awareness is needed and then you will be in bliss. Rather, you will be the bliss. And I +will repeat again: suffering will continue to happen, but now nothing can make you +suffer. Even if you are suddenly thrown into hell, just by your presence there, for you it +will be a hell no more. + + +Someone asked Socrates where he would like to go, so Socrates said, T don’t know + + + +whether there is a hell and a heaven. I don’t know whether they are there or not, but I will +not choose between them. My only prayer will be this: allow me to be alert wherever I +am. Let me be fully aware wherever I am. Whether it is hell or heaven, that is irrelevant.' +Because if you are fully alert, hell disappears — hell is your being not aware. If you are +fully aware, heaven appears — heaven is your being fully aware. + +Really there are no such geographical places as hell or heaven. And don’t go on thinking +in childish terms that someday you will die and God will send you to heaven or hell +according to your doings, according to whatsoever you have done on earth. No, you carry +your hell and heaven within you. Wherever you move, you carry your hell or heaven with +you. + +Even God cannot do anything. If suddenly you meet him, he will look like a hell. You +carry your hell within you; you project it wherever you are. You will suffer. The +encounter will be just death-like, intolerable. You may become unconscious. Whatsoever +happens to you, you carry within you. The seed of consciousness is the seed of the whole +existence. + +So remember, if you suffer you have chosen it: consciously, unconsciously, directly, +indirectly, you have chosen it. It is your choice and you are responsible. + +No one else is responsible. + +But in our mind, in our confused mind, everything is upside-down. If you suffer, you +think you suffer because of others. You suffer because of you. No one can make you +suffer. That is impossible. And even if someone makes you suffer, it is your choice to be +in suffering through him. You have chosen him and you have chosen a particular type of +suffering through him. No one can make you suffer — it is your choice. But you always +go on thinking that if the other changes, or if the other is doing something else, you will +not suffer. + +I have heard. Mulla Nasrudin was filling out a report because he had crashed his car into +a parked car. He was filling out a report, and many things were asked. When he came to +the part where it was asked what the driver of the other vehicle could have done to avoid +the accident, he filled it, 'He should have parked the car somewhere else. The car was +parked there; he should have parked it somewhere else — because of him the accident has +happened.’ + +And this is what you are doing. Always the other is responsible: he should have done +something or other and there would have been no suffering. No, the other is not +responsible at all. You are responsible, and unless you take this responsibility +consciously upon you, you will not change. The change will become possible, easily +possible, the moment you realize that you are responsible for it. + + +If you have suffered, it was your choice. This is what the law of karma is, nothing else: +you are wholly responsible. Whatsoever happens — suffering or happiness, hell or heaven +— whatsoever happens, ultimately you are totally responsible. This is what the law of +karma is: total responsibility is with you. + +But don’t be afraid, don’t be scared by it, because if the total responsibility is with you, +then suddenly a door of freedom opens — because if you are the cause of your suffering, +you can change. If others are the cause, then you cannot change. Then how can you +change? Unless the whole world changes, you will suffer. And there seems to be no way +to change others — then suffering cannot end. + + + +But we are so pessimistic that even such beautiful doctrines as the law of karma we +interpret in such a way that they don’t free and liberate us, but rather, on the contrary, +they make us more burdened. In India the law of karma has been kn own for at least five +thousand years or even more, but what have we done? It is not that we have taken +responsibility upon ourselves; we have thrown all the responsibility on the law of karma +— that it is happening because of the law of karma and we cannot do anything, nothing +can be done; because of the past lives this life is such. + +The law of karma was to free you. It was giving you total freedom towards yourself. + +No one else can make any suffering for you — this was the message. If you are suffering +you have created it. You are the master of your fate, and if you want to change it, +immediately you can change it and the life will be different. But the attitude.... + +I have heard, once two friends were talking. One was a bon a fide optimist, the other a +bonafide pessimist. Even the optimist was not too happy about the situation. The optimist +said, 'If this economic crisis continues and these political catastrophes continue and the +world remains the same as it is, immoral, then we are going to be reduced to begging +soon.’ + +Even he was not too hopeful about it — the optimist. When he said, 'We are going to be +reduced to begging,’ the pessimist said, 'From whom? From whom are you going to beg +if this condition continues?’ + +You have a mind, and you goon bringing your mind to everything. Really, you transfonn +the quality of every teaching and doctrine. You defeat Buddhas and Krishnas so easily +because you convert the whole thing; you color it in your own way. + +You are totally responsible for whatsoever you are and for whatsoever world you are +living in. It is your creation. If this goes deep in you, you can change everything. You +need not suffer. Don’t choose, be a witness, and bliss will happen to you. Bliss is not a +dead state. Suffering will go on continuing around you. + +So it is not a question of what happens to you; it is a question of how you are. The total +ultimate meaning comes from you, not from the happening. + +Question 2 + +LAST NIGHT YOU TALKED ABOUT BOREDOM. HOW CAN WE HOPE FOR AN +ENLIGHTENED SOCIETY WHEN IN ORDER TO MAINTAIN SOCIETY MOST +PEOPLE MUST PERFORM BORING, MONOTONOUS AND REPETITIVE TASKS? + +Again: nothing is boring, nothing is repetitive and monotonous — you are, and you bring +your quality to everything that you do. No act is boring in itself, and no act can be non- +boring in itself — it is you who make it boring or non-boring. And the same act can be a +boredom to you this moment and the next moment it may become a blissful thing. Not +that the act has changed; your mood, the quality you bring to the act, has changed. So +remember, you are not bored because repetitive acts have to be done. Rather, on the +contrary, you are bored — that’s why they appear repetitive. + +For instance, children want to repeat things. They go on playing the same game again and +again. You get bored. What are they doing? The same game again and again? They go on +asking for the same story. They enjoy it again and again, and they say, 'Tell me that story +again.’ + +What is the matter? You cannot conceive it. It looks stupid. It is not. They are so alive +that nothing is repetitive for them. You are dead and everything is repetitive for you. + + + +They go on repeating the same game. The whole day they can go on, and if you stop them +they will scream and cry and they will resist you, saying, 'Don’t destroy our game.’ And +you cannot understand what they are doing the whole day. + +They have a different quality of consciousness. Nothing is repetitive for them. They +enjoy it so much that the very enjoyment changes the quality, and then they enjoy it again +— and they enjoy it more, because now they know the know-how. The third time they +enjoy it even more, because now they are acquainted with everything. They go on +enjoying; their enjoyment goes on increasing. Your enjoyment goes on decreasing. + +What is the matter? Is the act itself boring, or is something wrong with your mode of +being, your mode of consciousness? + +Look at it from another angle. Two lovers will go on repeating the same acts every day. +They will kiss and they will hug — they are the same acts. And they would like to go on +doing that ad infinitum. If you give them time, they will go on repeating to the very end +of existence. Looking at two lovers, you will get bored. What are they doing? — the same +thing every day? And if you give them the whole day, they will go on hugging, loving, +embracing, kissing. What are they doing? + +Lovers have again become children. That’s why love is so innocent — it makes you a +child again. Now they are enjoying the game. + +They are again children. The whole nonsense of maturity they have thrown. They are +planing with each other's body, and to them nothing is repetitive. Each kiss is something +absolutely new, unique. It was never so before, it will never be the same again. Each +moment of love has its own individual existence, non-repetitive; that's why they goon +enjoying. + +The economic law of diminishing returns doesn't apply to it. For love, there is no law of +diminishing returns; rather, increasing returns. That's why economists cannot understand +love, mathematicians cannot understand love. All those who are efficient in calculation +cannot understand love, because this is absurd: it defies all laws, all mathematics — it +goes on increasing. + +When I was a student, when my teacher of economics explained to us about the law of +diminishing returns, I asked him about love, 'What do you say about love?’ He became +disturbed, and when I said that just the contrary — the law of increasing returns — applies +to love, he said to me, 'You go out of the class. You cannot understand economics.’ He +said, 'This law is universal.’ I said,' Don’t say it is universal, because what about love?’ +Two lovers appear to us as if they are repeating. To them, they are not repeating. But to a +prostitute the law of economics will apply, because for her, love is not love, it is a +commodity — something to be sold, something which can be purchased. + +So if you go and kiss a prostitute, for her it is boredom, repetition, and some day she will +say. 'This is nonsense. I am bored of being kissed and kissing the whole day. It is +intolerable.’ She will say that it is a repetitive act. + +That’s what I want to show you — the distinction. For a lover it is not repetitive; for a +prostitute it is repetitive. So, really, the act itself is not repetitive; it is your quality that +you bring to it. Whatsoever you do, if you love it, it will never be repetitive. If you love +your doings, your acts, there will be no boredom. But you don’t love. + +I go on talking to you every day. I can goon ad infinitum. I love it. It is not repetitive for +me. From eternity to eternity I can goon talking with you. Communication, to +communicate with your heart, is love to me. It is not a repetitive act, otherwise I would + + + +get bored. + +I have heard, one small child went with his father and mother to the church one Sunday, +and then the next and the next. On the third Sunday this little child asked his father, 'The +God must be getting bored, because there are the same faces every day in the church. For +three Sundays we have been coming here — the same faces! The God must be bored, +seeing them turning up again and again every Sunday.’ + +But the God is not bored. The whole existence has been repeating continuously. It looks +like repetition to us, but if there is a being, a total being, something like a God, he is not +bored. + +If he is bored there is no need to continue. He can stop. He can say, 'No more!’ He can +say, 'Finished!' But he is not bored. Why? + +He loves — whatsoever is happening is his love. He is a creator, not a worker, not a +laborer. He is a creator. + +A Picasso is not bored, he is a creator. If your act becomes creation, you will not be +bored. And your act becomes creation if you love it. But the basic difficulty is that you +cannot love whatsoever you do because you hate yourself — that's the problem. So +whatsoever you do, you hate it, because basically you hate yourself. + +You have not yet accepted yourself, you have not yet thanked existence for your +existence. From your heart there is no thank-you towards God. Really, you have a grudge +— 'Why have you created me?’ Deep down you go on asking. 'Why have I been thrown +into existence? What is the purpose?’ Think, if suddenly God meets you, what will be the +first question you will ask? You will ask, 'Why have you created me? To suffer? To be in +agony? To be unnecessarily wandering through lives and lives? Why did you create me? +Answer!’ + +You have not accepted yourself so how can you accept your acts? Love yourself. Accept +yourself as you are. Because action is secondary — it flows from your being. If I love +myself then whatsoever I do, I love it. And if I don’t love it, I stop it. What is the need to +continue? + +But you don’t love, and the source is unloved so the products of that source cannot be +loved. + +Whatsoever you do — you may be an engineer or you may be a doctor or a chemist or a +scientist — whatsoever you do, you will bring hate to it. Your hate makes it repetitive. +You hate it, and you go on finding excuses for why you are doing it. You say, 'I am +doing it for my wife, for my children.’ And your father was doing it for you, and his +father was doing it for him, and your children will do it for their children, and no one will +enjoy life. + +These are tricks. You are simply a coward. You cannot escape from it, because it gives +you security, safety, income, bank balance. Because you are a coward, you cannot stop +doing it and you cannot start doing that which you love. Then you go on putting +everything on your children, on your wife, and they are also doing the same. + +Ask the child. He is going to the school, he is bored. He says, 'I am going for my father. +He feels happy. If I don’t go he feels very miserable.’ And your wife? — she is doing +everything just for you and the children. No one is really existing for himself. No one +loves himself enough to exist for himself. Then everything goes wrong. The source is +poisoned, and then all that comes out of that source is poisoned. + +And don’t think that if you change your job, you will love it. No, you will bring your + + + +quality to the new job also. In the beginning it may be a sensation, something new, but +sooner or later you will settle down and it will be the same. + +Change yourself, love yourself, and love whatsoever you do; howsoever small it makes +no difference. + +I am reminded of an anecdote. It happened that when Abraham Lincoln became +President, on the first day when he was inaugurating the senate, someone who was very +jealous of his power, his prestige, his success, stood and said to Abraham Lincoln, +'Lincoln, don’t forget that your father was a shoemaker.’ + +It was absolutely irrelevant, absurd, and the man who said this added, 'Your father was a +shoemaker, and he used to make shoes for my family. Don’t forget him.’ + +It was just to insult him, and the whole senate laughed because everyone was jealous. +Deep down everyone was feeling, 'This chair belongs to me, and this man has usurped +it.’ Of course, whenever someone succeeds, he succeeds in some cunning way; only you +succeed rightly. This is how we adjust to others' successes — it was cunning, by some +wrong techniques somehow he has reached. This is how w can tolerate it and console +ourselves. So the whole senate laughed. + +But Abraham Lincoln said something which is beautiful. He said, 'It is so good of you to +remind me of my father. I know he was a shoemaker — but I have never seen such a +shoemaker. He was unique, he was a creator, because he loved shoemaking. And I cannot +think myself as successful as he was, because I don’t love this presidency as much as he +loved shoemaking. + +He enjoyed it, he was blissful. I will never be as blissful in this presidency as he was just +as a shoemaker. + +'But why have you remembered him this moment? I know,’ said Abraham Lincoln, 'that +my father was making shoes for your family, but they never complained, so I hope the +shoes were alright. But you remember him in this moment, without any relevance — I feel +some shoe is still pinching. I am his son, I can repair it.’ + +If you love yourself, if you love your work, you live in a different milieu. In that milieu +nothing is repeated. Repetition appears only to a bored mind. Don’t say that you are bored +because of repetitive acts. Acts appear repetitive because you are bored — then +whatsoever you do will appear repetitive. + +But look at life — life enjoys repetition. The seasons move in a circle. The sun moves in a +circle — every day, every morning, it arises. And the summer comes and the winter +comes and the rains come and they go on moving. In a deep way the whole existence is +repetitively moving. It seems creation is just like a child's play. The trees are not bored, +and the sky is not bored. The sky never says, 'Now, again the clouds?’ For so many many +millennia the sky has been seeing the clouds — every rainy season the clouds come and +they start moving. Look at life? It is repetitive. + +The word is not good; the word 'repetitive' is not good. + +Rather it will be better to say it goes on playing the same game. It enjoys it so much that +it wants to repeat it again. And it goes on increasing; it goes on moving towards a climax. +Why does man get bored with repetition? Not because repetition is boring, but because +you are so bored that everything will be boring. + +Once it happened that Sigmund Freud was asking a patient questions; just the preliminary +basic questions that he asked before the psychoanalysis could start. He asked, 'Look at + + + +the book-case, and what does it immediately remind you of?’ + +The man looked at the books, not really looking at all, and he said, 'It reminds me of a +woman, a beautiful woman.’ This was good for Freud, because it was falling under his +theory that everything is sexual, so he said, 'Okay.' Then he took his handkerchief and +said, 'Look at this. What does this remind you of immediately? Whatsoever comes to +your mind." + +The man laughed and said, 'A beautiful woman.’ + +Freud was overjoyed. Really that was his theory — that every man is basically concerned +with sex and nothing else. Man thinks of woman, woman thinks of man, and that is all +thinking. So he said, 'Look at the door.’ There was no one at the door, there was no one +even moving in the street. He said, 'Look, there is no one. This absence — what do you +feel? What do you immediately remember?’ + +The man said, 'A beautiful woman.’ + + +Now even Freud was a little disturbed whether this man was just deceiving him or not, so +he said, 'It seems too much. Everything makes you remember a woman-’ + +The man said, 'That is not the point. Whether it is a bookcase or a handkerchief or an +empty door is not the point. Really, I never think of anything except of women. I never +think of anything else, so whatsoever you say is irrelevant. I think only of women. It is +not that everything reminds me of them; I am thinking only of women — it is not a +question of any reminding.’ + +So really it is not a question that this act makes you bored or that act makes you bored, or +repetition or monotony or tedious jobs make you bored. The real thing is that you are +bored whether you do something or not. If you are simply relaxing in a chair you will be +bored. Not doing anything you will be bored. You will say, 'There is nothing to do and I +am bored. Nothing to do — I am bored.’ The whole week you are bored because of the +tedious job, and on the week-end you are bored because there is nothing to do. The whole +life you are bored because of doing a repetitive job in a factory, in an office, in a shop. +Then when you retire you are bored, because now there is nothing to do. + +It is not a question of anything else. Something is not creating boredom in you; you are +bored, and you go on bringing your boredom to everything that you touch. + +You have heard of King Midas — whatsoever he touched became gold. You are also a +King Midas — whatsoever you touch becomes boredom. You have an alchemical touch: +you can change everything into a boredom; everything, I say. + +Don’t think of changing j obs, actions; think of changing the quality of your +consciousness. Be more loving to yourself. The first thing to remember is to be more +loving to yourself. The moralists have poisoned the whole world. They say, 'Don’t love +yourself. This is selfishness.’ They say, 'Love others, don’t love yourself. The love of the +self is sin.’ + +And I say to you that this is absolute nonsense — and not only nonsense; it is dangerous +nonsense. Unless you love yourself you cannot love anybody, it is impossible, because a +man who is not in love with himself cannot be in love with anybody. If you are in love +with yourself, only then can your overflowing love reach somebody. + +A man who has not loved himself will hate himself, and if you yourself hate yourself, +how can you love anybody? You will hate others also. You can only pretend. And when +you cannot love yourself, how do you expect others to love you? Everyone is condemned + + + +in his own eyes. The whole moralistic teaching gives you only one thing: techniques of +self condemnation — how to condemn yourself, how you are bad, a criminal, guilty, a +sinner. + +Christianity says that your being a sinner is not a question of what you do/ you are bom a +sinner. + +It is not a question of whether you do some sin or not; no, you are a bom sinner. Man is +bom in sin. Adam, the first man, committed the sin, and you are descendants. The sin has +been committed, nothing can be done. Now it cannot be undone, and you are bom into +sin — Adam’s sin. + +If you are bom in sin, how can you love yourself? If your very being is guilt, how can +you love yourself? And if you cannot love yourself, you cannot love anybody. The love +must happen at home first — you are the home — and only when it overflows can it reach +to others. And when it overflows, it overflows into your acts, into whatsoever you do. +Whether you paint or make a shoe or anything — just cleaning the street — whatsoever +you do, if you are in deep love, if you are in deep love with yourself, it flows into +everything you do. It flows even when you are not doing anything. It goes on flowing, it +becomes your very existence, and then nothing is boring. + +People come to me; sometimes very sympathetically some friends ask me, 'The whole +day you are sitting in one room, not even looking out of the window. Don’t you get +bored?' I am with myself. Why should I get bored? They say, 'Just sitting alone, don’t +you get bored?’ + +If I hate myself I will get bored, because you cannot live with a person you hate. You get +bored with yourself. You cannot be alone. Even if you are alone for a few moments you +get fidgety, you get uncomfortable, an uneasiness comes into your being. + +You long to meet someone, because you cannot remain with yourself. The company is so +boring — your own company. You cannot look at your own face. You cannot touch your +hand lovingly; no — impossible. + +They ask me — and their asking is relevant to their own reference, because they will get +bored if they are alone — they ask me, 'Don’t you go out sometimes?’ There is no need. +Sometimes they ask me, 'People come to you with the same problem again and again. +Don’t you get bored?’ + +Because everyone has the same problem. You are so unoriginal you cannot even create +an original problem. Everyone has the same problem. Some are related with your love, +with your sex, with your peace of mind, with your confusion, or something else — some +psychology, some pathology, something — but man can be easily divided into seven +categories, and there are the same questions, the seven basic questions, and people go on +asking them. So friends ask me, 'Don’t you get bored?’ + +I never get bored, because each individual is unique to me, and because of the individual, +the problem he brings is not a repetition because the context is different, the individual is +different. You come with your love problem, another comes with his love problem: both +look similar but they are not, because two individuals are so different — their difference +changes the quality of the problem. + +So if you categorize, you can categorize into seven categories, but I never categorize. + +Each individual is so unique that he cannot be put with anyone else. No category can be +made. But then you have to have a very keen awareness to penetrate to the very root + + + +where the individual is unique. Otherwise, on the surface everyone is alike. + +Just on the surface everyone is alike, with the same problems, but if you penetrate deep, +if you are alert and ready to move with the person to the deeper core of his being, the +deeper you go, the more original, individual and unique a phenomenon comes into being. +If you can see to the very center, this person before you is unrepeatable. He has never +been before, he will never be again. He is just unique. And the mystery then overfills you +— the mystery of the unique person. + +Nothing is a repetition if you know how to penetrate, how to be loving and alert. +Otherwise everything is repetitive. You are bored because you have a consciousness +which creates boredom. Change the consciousness, and there will be no boredom. But +you go on changing objects — that will not make any difference. + + +THE END. + + + +Chapter 65: Life is a mystery, not a problem + + +PUT MINDSTUFF + +IN SUCH INEXPRESSIBLE FINENESS +ABOVE, BELOW AND IN YOUR HEART. + +CONSIDER ANY AREA OF YOUR PRESENT FORM +AS LIMITLESSLY SPACIOUS. + +Life is not a problem but a mystery. For science life is a problem, but for religion it is a +mystery. A problem can be solved, a mystery cannot be solved — it can be lived but it +cannot be solved. Religion offers no solutions, no answers. Science offers answers; +religion has none. + +This is the basic difference, and before you make any effort to understand what religion + +is, this basic difference in the very approach of a religious mind and a scientific mind is +to be deeply understood. + +When I say that science looks at life as a problem, as something which can be solved, the +whole approach becomes intellectual. Then the mind is involved, not you. You are out of + +it. The mind manipulates, the mind tackles, the mind penetrates and analyses. The mind +argues, doubts, experiments, but you as a totality are out of it. Hence this very puzzling +phenomenon: a scientist may be a very keen intellectual as far as his own department of +research is concerned, but in ordinary life he will be just as ordinary a human being as +anyone else — nothing special, just ordinary. In his own branch of knowledge he may be +a genius, but in life he is just ordinary. + +Science includes only your intellect, not your totality. + +An intellect has a violence, it is aggressive. That is why very few women can be +scientists — aggression is not natural to them. Intellect is male, aggressive, violent: that is +why men are more scientific and women are more religious. Intellect tries to dissect, +divide, analyze, and whenever you dissect an alive thing, the life disappears. Only dead +parts are left in your hands. + +That is why science never touches life. Really, whatsoever it touches becomes dead. +When science says there is no soul or there is no God it is meaningful, not because their +is no soul or no God, but because this shows that the very approach of the scientific mind +is such that you cannot touch life anywhere. Wherever science touches, death happens. In +the very method, in the very way, in the very approach of division, analysis, dissection, +life is bracketed out. + +One thing: intellect is violent and aggressive, so the ultimate outcome through intellect +can only be death, not life. It is partial, not total, and parts are dead. Life is an organic +unity. You can know life through synthesis, not through analysis. The greater the +synthesis the higher the forms of life that evolve. God is the ultimate synthesis, the total +unity, the wholeness of existence. God is not a puzzle but the ultimate synthesis of all +that is — matter is the ultimate analysis of all that is. + +So science comes to atomic materiality and religion comes to cosmic consciousness. + +Science moves downwards to the last, lowest denominator and religion moves upwards to +the highest denominator. They move in opposite dimensions. So science transforms + + + +everything into a problem, because if you have to tackle it scientifically, you first have to +decide whether it is a problem or not. Religion takes mystery as the base. There is no +problem, life is not a problem. The emphasis is that it cannot be solved. A problem means +something solvable, something which can be known, something knowable. It may not be +known right now, but it is not unknowable. At the most it may be unknown, but that +unknownness will disappear and it will be transfonned into a known thing. + +So really, religion cannot ask a question like, "What is life?" This is absurd. Religion +cannot ask such a question as, "What is God?" This is nonsense. The very approach of +religion is not to create problems. Religion can ask how to be more alive, how to be in +the very current of life, how to live abundantly; religion can ask how to be a God — but it +cannot ask what God is. + +We can live mysteries, we can become one with them, we can lose ourselves in them, we +can have a totally difference existence, the very quality changes — but nothing is solved, +because nothing can be solved. And all that appears to be solvable, all that appears to be +knowable, is only because we are taking it in fragments. + +If we look at the whole then nothing is knowable, we just go on pushing the mystery +backwards. All our questions are temporary, they appear to be answers only to lazy +minds. If you have a penetrating mind you will come again upon the same mystery, only +it has been pushed back, a step back. Just behind the answers the question is hidden. You +have simply created a facade of an answer, just a curtain over the mystery. + +If you can feel the distinction, then from the very beginning religion takes on a different +shape, a different color and a different view. The whole perspective changes. These +techniques that we are discussing here are not to solve anything — they don’t take life as a +problem. Life is there. It has been a mystery and will remain a mystery. Whatsoever we +do we cannot demystify it, because to be mysterious is the very quality of it. That life is +mysterious is not something accidental, it is not something which can be separated, it is +the very life itself. So to me, the more you enter into the mysterium, into the mysterious, +the more religious you become. + +A really religious man will not say that he believes in God; he will not say that God +exists. These things seem to be very superficial, they seem to be like answers given to +certain questions. A religious man cannot utter such profanities — that God is. It is such a +profound phenomenon, such a mysterious thing, that to say anything will be profane. + +So whenever someone asked Buddha whether God existed or not, he remained silent. + +You are asking a thing which cannot be answered. Not that there is no God, but to answer +such a thing will make it answerable. Then life will become a problem which can be +answered. Then the mystery disappears. So Buddha said, "Don’t ask me any metaphysical +questions." + +Questions can only be physical. Physics can answer them. Metaphysical questions are not +there, they cannot be, because metaphysics means the mystery. + +These techniques are to help you to move more deeply into mystery, not into knowledge. +Or you can look at it in a different way: these techniques are to help you to be +unburdened of your knowledge. They are not to help you to increase your +'knowledgeability', because 'knowledgeability' is the barrier. The door is then closed for +the mystery. The more you know, the less you are capable of penetrating deep into life. +The original wonder must be recaptured, because in a childlike sense of wonder nothing +is known and everything becomes a mystery. And if you move into the mystery, the + + + +deeper you move, the deeper the mystery becomes. Then a moment comes when you can +say that you don’t know anything. That is the right moment. + +Now you have become meditative. When you can feel a deep ignorance, when you +become aware that you don’t know anything, you have come to the right balancing point +from where the door of the mystery can open. + +If you know, then the door is closed; if you are ignorant, fully alert that you don’t know +anything, the door suddenly opens. The very feeling that you don’t know opens the door. +So take these techniques not as knowledge, but as a help to make you more innocent. +Ignorance is innocent, knowledge is always a sort of cunningness, cleverness. If you can +use your knowledge to be ignorant again, then you have used it rightly. This is the only +use of all the scriptures, of all the knowledge, of all the Vedas — to make you childlike +again. + +Now the first technique: + +PUT MINDSTUFF IN SUCH INEXPRESSIBLE FINENESS +ABOVE, BELOW AND IN YOUR HEART. + +Three things. First, if knowledge is important then the head is the center; if childlike +innocence is important then the heart is the center. The child lives in the heart; we live in +the head. The child feels; we think. Even when we say that we feel, we think that we feel. +Thinking becomes primary for us, feeling becomes secondary. Thinking is the tool for +science, feeling is the tool for religion. + +You must start to be a feeling organism again. And both the dimensions are different. +When you think, you remain separate; when you feel, you melt. + +Think about a flower, a rose flower. When you think, you are separate, there is a gap, a +distance, a space. For thinking, space is needed; for thoughts to move, distance is needed. + +Feel the flower and the gap disappears, the distance drops. Because for feeling, distance +is the barrier. The closer you come, the more you feel. A moment comes when even +closeness appears to be a sort of distance — and then melting happens. Then you cannot +feel the boundaries of where you are and where the flower is, of where you end and +where the flower begins. Then boundaries melt into each other: the flower enters you in a +way, you enter the flower in a way. Feeling is losing the boundaries; thinking is creating +the boundaries. That is why thinking always insists on definitions, because without +definitions you cannot create boundaries. + +Thinking says define first, and feeling says don't define. If you define, feeling stops. + +The child feels; we think. The child comes close to existence, he melts and allows the +existence to melt into him. We are isolated, imprisoned in the head. We are like islands. +This sutra says to come back to the heart center. Start feeling things. It will be a great +experiment if you start feeling things. Whatsoever you do, give a certain amount of your +time and energy to feeling. You are sitting here, you can listen to me — but that will be +part of thinking. You can also feel me here but that will not be a part of thinking. If you +can feel my presence, then definitions are lost. Then really, if you come to a moment of +feeling, you don’t know who is speaking and who is listening. + +This can happen right this very moment. Then the speaker becomes the listener and the +listener becomes the speaker. Then really they are not two, rather, they are two poles of +one phenomenon: on one pole is the speaker, on another pole is the listener. But these are +just poles, isolated. They are not real. The real thing is just in-between these two — the + + + +life, the flow. Whenever you feel, something other than your ego becomes important. +Object and subject lose their definitions. A flow, a wave, exists — on one pole the +speaker, on another pole the listener, but the life is the wave. + +Head gives you clarity, and because of this clarity much confusion has come into being +because the head defines clearly, marks boundaries, makes maps. With reason, +everything is clear-cut: no vagueness, no mystery is allowed. All that is vague is rejected, +only the clear is real. Reason gives you a clarity, and because of clarity, a great +misunderstanding arises. Clarity is not reality. Reality is always unclear, vague. Concepts +are clear, reality is mysterious; concepts are rational, reality is irrational. + +Words are clear, logic is clear life is not clear. The heart gives you a melting vagueness. + +It reaches reality more intimately, but it is not clear. And because we have chosen clarity +as the goal, we have been missing reality. You must have unclear eyes to enter reality +again. + +You must be vague, you must be ready to enter into something which cannot be +conceptualized, into something which is not logic, into something which is staggering +and real, staggering and alive. + +Clarity is dead. It remains fixed. Life is a flux, nothing is fixed, nothing remains the same +the next moment. How can you be clear about it? If you insist too much on clarity you +will lose contact with it. That is what has happened. + +This sutra says that the basic thing is to come back to the heart center — but how to come +to it? PUT MINDSTUFF IN SUCH INEXPRESSABLE FINENESS ABOVE, BELOW +AND IN YOUR HEART. + +The word Tnindstuff is not a good translation of the original Sanskrit word CHITT. But +English has no other equivalent. So it is good in a way, it carries the meaning, not of +'mind’ but of Tnindstuff . + +Mind means mentation, thinking, thought, and tnindstuff means the background upon +which these thoughts float — just as in the sky the clouds move. Clouds are the thoughts +and the sky is the background upon which they move. That sky, consciousness, has been +called mindstuff. Your mind can be without thoughts; then it is chitt, then it is pure mind. +When it has thoughts it is impure mind. + +If your mind can be without thought, then it is very subtle, the subtlest thing possible in +existence. You cannot conceive of a more subtle possibility. Consciousness is the most +subtle thing. + +So when there are no thoughts in the mind, you have pure mind. The pure mind can move +towards the heart, the impure mind cannot. By impurity I don’t mean any immoral +thoughts in the mind, by impurity I mean all thoughts — thought as such is impure. + +Even if you are thinking of God it is an impurity, because the cloud is moving. The cloud +is very white, but the cloud is there and the purity of the space is not there. A cloudless +sky is not there. A cloud may be a black cloud, a sexual thought moving in the mind, or +the cloud may be a white cloud, beautiful, a prayer moving in the mind, but in both cases +the pure mind is not there. It is impure, clouded. And if the mind is clouded you cannot +move in the heart. + +This has to be understood because with thoughts you cling to the head. Thoughts are the +roots, and unless those roots are cut you cannot fall back to the heart. + +The child remains in the heart only up to the moment that thoughts crystalize, that +thoughts start floating in his mind. Then they take root; then through education, culture, + + + +cultivation, they become rooted; then by and by the consciousness moves from the heart +to the head. The consciousness can remain in the head only if there are thoughts. This is +basic. If there are no thoughts, consciousness immediately drops back to its original +innocence in the heart. + +Hence so much emphasis on meditation, so much emphasis on non-thinking, on +thoughtless awareness, on choiceless awareness, or on Buddha’s 'right mindfulness’, +which is just mindfulness without any thought, just being aware. + +What happens then? A very great phenomenon happens because when the roots are cut, +immediately consciousness drops back to the heart, to the original place where it had +been. You become a child again. + +Jesus said, "Only those who are like children will enter into the kingdom of my God." He +refers to those persons whose consciousness has come back to the heart. They have +become innocent, childlike. + +But the first basic requirement is to PUT MINDSTUFF IN SUCH INEXPRESSIBLE +FINENESS.... + +Thoughts can be expressed. There is not a single thought which is inexpressible, nor can +there be. If it is inexpressible you cannot think it; if you can think it, it is expressible. +There is not a single thought which you can say is inexpressible. The moment you can +think it, it has become expressible — you have already expressed it to yourself. +Consciousness, pure consciousness, is inexpressible. That is why mystics go on saying +that they cannot express what they know. Logicians always raise the question that if you +know, then why can’t you say it? And their argument has meaning and significance. If +you really say that you know then why can’t you express it? + +For a logician, knowledge must be expressible — that which can be known can be made +known to others, there is no problem. If you have known it, then where is the problem? +You can make it known to others. + +But the mystic's knowledge is not of thoughts. He has not known it as a thought, he has +known it as a feeling. So really, it is not good to say, "I know God." It is better to say, "I +feel." It is not good to say, "I have known God." It is better to say, "I have felt him." That +is a more accurate description of the phenomenon because the 'knowledge' is through the +heart it is like feeling, it is not like knowledge. + +PUT MINDSTUFF IN SUCH INEXPRESSIBLE FINENESS.... Mindstuff, +consciousness, CHITT, is inexpressible. If a single thought is moving, it is expressible. +So, to PUT MINDSTUFF IN SUCH INEXPRESSIBLE FINENESS means to come to a +point where you are conscious, but not conscious of any thought; where you are alert, but +there is no thought moving in the mind. This is a delicate point and very difficult — you +can miss it easily. + +We know two states of mind. One is when thoughts are there. When thoughts are there, +you cannot move to the heart. Then we know another state of mind — when thoughts are +not there. When thoughts are not there, you fall asleep. Then too, you cannot move to the +heart. Every night, for a few moments, for a few hours, you fall out of thinking. Thoughts +cease, but you don't reach to the heart because you are unconscious. So a very delicate +balance is needed. Thoughts must cease as they cease in deep sleep, when there is no +dream — and you must be as alert as you are while awake. + + +These two points must meet. Mind must be as thoughtless as it is in deep sleep, but you + + + +must not be asleep, you must be perfectly alert, aware. + +When awareness and this thoughtlessness meet, it is meditation. That is why Patanjali +says that samadhi is like SUSHUPTI. The highest ecstasy, samadhi, is like the deepest +sleep, with only one difference: in it you are not asleep. But the quality is the same — +thoughtless, dreamless, undisturbed, without a single ripple, totally calm and quiet, but +alert. When you are aware and there is no thought, you will feel a sudden transformation +in your consciousness. The center changes. You are thrown back. You are thrown to the +heart. And from the heart, when you look at the world, there is no world, there is only +God. From the head, when you look towards existence, there is no God, there is only +material existence. + +Matter, material existence, the world, and God are not two things, two outlooks, two +perspectives. They are the same phenomenon looked at from two centers of being. + +PUT MINDSTUFF IN SUCH INEXPRESSIBLE FINENESS, ABOVE, BELOW AND +IN YOUR HEART. Be totally in it, merged, immersed. Be simply consciousness, above, +below, in the heart; the whole heart surrounded by simple consciousness; not thinking +anything in particular, just being aware, with no word, with no verbalization, not thinking +at all, just being. + +Put mindstuff above, below, and in your heart, and everything will become possible to +you. + +All the doors of perception will be cleansed and all the doors of mysteries will be opened. +Suddenly there will be no problem, and suddenly there will be no misery — it is as if the +darkness has disappeared completely. Once you know this you can move back to the head +but you will not be the same. Now you can use the head as an instrument. You can work +with it, but now you are not identified with it, and even while working with it and +looking at the world through it, you will know that whatsoever you are seeing is because +of the intellect. Now you are acquainted with a higher standpoint, a deeper view — and +any moment you want to you can drop back. + +Once you know the passage and how consciousness drops back; how your age, your past, +your memory and your knowledge, disappear and you become a newborn child again — +once you know this secret, this passage, you can travel to that point as many times as you +like, and you can be refreshed again and again. If you have to move to the head, you can +use it; you can move in the ordinary world, working but not getting involved in it, +because deep down you know that that which is known by the intellect is partial. It is not +the whole truth. And a partial truth is more dangerous than a lie, because it appears to be +true and you can be deceived by it. + +Some more points. When you move to the heart, you look at existence as a total being. + +The heart is not departmental, the heart is not a fragment of you, the heart means you in +your totality. Mind is a fragment, hand is a fragment, leg is a fragment, stomach is a +fragment, the whole body taken in parts is fragmented. The heart is not a fragment. That +is why my hand can be cut off and I will be alive. Even my brain can be removed and I +will be alive, but if the heart is gone, I am gone. + +Really, my whole body can be removed but if my heart is beating I am alive. The heart +means your wholeness, so when the heart fails, you are no longer there. All other things +are just parts, disposable. If the heart is beating you will remain intact. The center of the +heart is the very core of your existence. I can touch you with my hand. That touch will +give me a certain knowledge about you, about your skin, whether it is smooth or not. The + + + +hand will give a certain knowledge to me, but that knowledge will be partial because the +hand is not my wholeness. I can see you. My eyes will give a certain knowledge from a +different standpoint but that will not be the whole. I can think about you — again the same +thing. But I cannot feel you in part. If I feel you at all I feel you in your wholeness. That +is why, unless you know through love, you never know the wholeness of any person. + +Only love can reveal the whole personality to you, the whole being, the essential, the +total. + +Because love means knowing through the heart, feeling through the heart. So to me, +feeling and knowing are not two fragments of your being. Feeling is your whole being +and knowing is just a fragment of it. + +To religion love is the highest knowledge. That is why religion is expressed more in +poetic terms than in scientific ones. Scientific terms cannot be used, they belong to the +realm of knowing. Poetry can be used. And those who have come to know reality through +love, whatsoever they say becomes poetry. The Upanishads, the Vedas, the sayings of +Jesus or Buddha or Krishna, they are all poetic statements. + +It is not just a coincidence that all the old religious scriptures are written in poetry. It has +a significance. It shows that there is some affinity between the world of a poet and the +world of a mystic. The mystic is also using the language of the heart. + +The poet is only a mystic in certain moments of flight, just as when you jump you can go +away from the gravitation of the earth, but you again come back to it. A poet means a +person who has been for some seconds on a flight into the world of the mystics. He has +had some glimpses. A mystic is one who has gone beyond gravitation completely, who +lives in the world of love, who lives through the heart. This has become his very abode. +For the poetic person it is just a glimpse: sometimes he falls down from the head to the +heart. + +But this is just for the time being — again he goes back to the head. So if you see a +beautiful poem, don’t try to see the poet who has written it because you will not meet the +same person. You will be disappointed because you will meet a very ordinary man. He +had a glimpse. For certain moments reality was revealed to him and he came down to the +heart. But he doesn't know the passage. He is not the master of it. It has been a happening +and he cannot move to it by his own will. + +When Coleridge died he left about forty thousand incomplete poems. He really +completed only seven poems in his whole life. He became a great poet, one of the +greatest in the world, but he was asked many times, "Why do you go on piling up +incomplete poems, and when are you going to complete them?" He said, "I cannot do +anything. Sometimes a few lines come to me and then they stop. So how can I complete +them? I will wait. I will have to wait. If it happens again and the glimpse comes to me, +and I again have the world revealed to me, the reality, then I will complete it. But on my +own I can do nothing." He must have been a very sincere poet. To find such sincere poets +is difficult, because the tendency of the mind is to supply. If three lines have come then +you will supply the fourth, and the fourth will kill all the three because it will come from +a very lower state of mind — when you are back on the earth. + + +When you jumped, and you were freed for some moments from gravitation, you had a +different dimension of being. + + + +A poet moves on the earth but sometimes he jumps. In those jumps he has glimpses. A +mystic lives in the heart. He doesn’t move on the earth, the heart has become his abode. + +So he doesn’t really create poetry but whatsoever he does becomes poetic, whatsoever he +says becomes poetry. Really, a mystic cannot use prose because his prose is also poetry — +it is coming through the heart, it is coming through love. + +PUT MINDSTUFF IN SUCH INEXPRESSIBLE FINENESS, ABOVE, BELOW AND +IN YOUR HEART. The heart is your total being, and when you are total you can know +the total — remember this. Only the similar can know the similar. When you are +fragmentary you cannot know the total. As within, so without. When you are total within, +the total reality without is revealed to you; you have become capable of knowing it, you +have earned the right to know it. When you are fragmented within, the reality is +fragmented without. So whatsoever you are within will be the without for you. + +Deep in the heart the whole world is different, the gestalt is different. I am looking at +you. If I am looking at you through the head, through intellect, through one of my parts +of knowing, then a few friends are here, individuals, egos — separate. But if I am looking +at you through the heart, then individuals are not here. + +Then just an oceanic consciousness is here and individuals are just waves. If I look at you +through the heart, then you and your neighbor are not two, then the reality is between you +and your neighbor. You are just two poles, and the real is just in-between. Then here +there is an ocean of consciousness in which you exist as waves. But waves are not +separate, they are linked together. And you are melting every moment into the other, +whether you know it or not. + +The breath that was within you just a moment ago has left you — now it is moving into +your neighbor. Just a moment before, it was your life and you would have died without it, +and now it is moving into your neighbor. It is his life now. Your body is continuously +radiating vibrations, you are a radiator, so your life energy is constantly moving into the +neighbor and his life energy is moving into you. + +If I look at you from my heart, if I look at you with loving eyes, if I look at you totally, +then you are just radiating points, and life is moving continuously from you to others and +from others to you.... + +And not only just in this room, this whole universe is a constant flux of life energy. It +goes on moving. There are no individual units, it is a cosmic whole. But through intellect +the cosmic never appears, only fragments, atomic fragments, appear. And this is not a +question which can be comprehended through intellect. + +If you try to comprehend through intellect it will be impossible to comprehend it. It is a +totally different outlook, from a different point of existence. + +If you are total within, the totality without is revealed to you. Some have called that +revelation God-realization: some have called it moksha, liberation; some have called it +nirvana, cessation. Different words, altogether different words, but they signify the same +core, the same essence. + +One thing is basic to all these expressions — the individual disappears. You may call it +God-realization, then you are no longer an individual; you can call it liberation, then you +are no longer a self; you can call it cessation — as Buddha has called it — then just as a +lamp, a flame, ceases to be, disappears, disperses, you cannot find it anywhere again, you +cannot locate it, it has gone into non-being, so the individual disappears. But this point +has to be pondered over. Why do all religions say that the individual, the self, the ego, + + + +disappears when you realize the truth? If all religions emphasize this, this means that the +self must be illusory — otherwise how can it disappear? The self must not be there really, +only then can it disappear. This may seem paradoxical, but this is so: only that which is +not can disappear. That which is will persist in being, it cannot disappear. + +Just because of the head a false entity has come into being — the individual. + +If you come down to the heart, the false entity disappears. It was a creation of the head. +From the heart the cosmic is, the individual is not; the whole is, the parts are not. And +remember, when you are not, you cannot create a hell; when you are not, you cannot be +in misery; when you are not, there can be no anxiety, no suffering. All anxiety, all +suffering, exists because of you — the shadow of the shadow. The self is unreal, the ego is +unreal, and because of that unreal self many unreal shadows are created. They follow +you, you go on fighting with them, but you will never be victorious because the base goes +on being hidden within you. + +Swami Ramteerth has said somewhere that he was staying in a house, in a poor villager's +house. The small child of the villager was playing just in front of the hut, and the sun was +rising and the child saw his shadow. He tried to catch it, but the more he moved, the more +the shadow would move ahead. The child started crying. He was a failure. He tried in +every way to catch it, but it was impossible. To catch a shadow is impossible — not +because a shadow is such a difficult thing to catch, it is impossible because the child was +moving to catch it. When he was moving, the shadow moved ahead. You cannot catch a +shadow because a shadow has no substance, and only a substance can be caught. +Ramteerth was sitting there. He was laughing and the child was crying, and the mother +was at a loss about what to do. + +How to console the child? So she said to Ramteerth, "Swamiji, can you help me?" +Ramteerth went to the child, caught the child's hand and put it on his head — the shadow +was caught. Now that the child had put his hand on his head, the shadow was caught. The +child started laughing. Now he could see that his hand had caught the shadow. + +You cannot catch a shadow, but you can catch yourself. And the moment you catch +yourself, the shadow is caught. + +Suffering is just a shadow of the ego. We are all like that child, fighting with suffering, +anxiety, anguish, and trying to disperse them. We can never be victorious. It is not a +question of strength — the whole effort is absurd, impossible. You must catch the self, the +ego, and once you catch it, suffering suddenly disappears. It was just a shadow. + +There are persons who start fighting with the self. It has been taught, "Disperse the self, +be egoless, and you will be in bliss," so they start fighting the self, the ego. But if you +fight you are still believing that the self exists. Your fight will give food to it, it will +become an energy-giving thing to it, you will be feeding it. This technique says don’t +think of the ego, just move from the head to the heart and the ego will disappear. The ego +is a projection of the head. Don't fight with it. You can go on fighting for lives together, +but if you remain in the head you cannot win. + + +Just change the standpoint, just move from the head to a different standpoint, to a deeper +standpoint of the being, and the whole thing changes because now you can look from a +different perspective. From the heart there is no ego. Because of this we have become +afraid of the heart. We never allow it to have its own way, we always interfere with it, we + + + +always bring mind into it. We try to control the heart through the mind because we have +become afraid — if you move to the heart, you lose yourself. And this losing is just like +death. Hence the incapacity to love, hence the fear of falling in love. Because you lose +yourself, you are not in control. Something greater than you grips you and takes +possession. Then you are not on sure ground and you don’t know where you are moving. +So the head says, "Don’t be a fool, move with reason. Don’t be mad." + +Whenever someone is in love everyone thinks that he is mad. He himself thinks that +something has gone crazy, "I am not in my senses!" Why does it happen? Because now +there is no control. Something is happening that he cannot control, he cannot manage and +manipulate. Rather, something is manipulating him, a greater force has taken him over. +He is possessed.... + +But unless you are ready to be possessed there can be no God for you. Unless you are +ready to be possessed there is no mystery for you, and no bliss, no benediction. + +One who is ready to be possessed by love, by prayer, by the cosmos, means one who is +ready to die as an ego. Only that one can know what life really is, what life has to give. +What is possible becomes immediately actual, but you must put yourself at the stake. + +This technique is beautiful. It doesn’t say anything about your ego. It doesn’t say anything +about it. It simply gives you a technique, and if you follow the technique, the ego will +have disappeared. + +The second sutra: + +CONSIDER ANY AREA OF YOUR PRESENT FORM AS LIMITLESSLY +SPACIOUS. + +This is the same, through a different door. The basic essential is the same, that is, to +destroy limits. Mind creates limits. If you don't think, you move into the unlimited. Or, +from a different door, you can try with the unlimited and you will fall from the mind. The +mind cannot co-exist with the unlimited, with the undefined, unbordered, infinite. The +mind cannot exist with the unbordered, so if you can try something limitless, the mind +will disappear. + +This technique says, CONSIDER ANY AREA OF YOUR PRESENT FORM AS +LIMITLESSLY SPACIOUS. Any area. You can just close your eyes and imagine that +your head has become infinite. Now there are no boundaries to it. It goes on and on and +on and there is no boundary to it. Your head has become the whole cosmos, without any +boundaries. If you can imagine this, suddenly thoughts will stop. + +If you can imagine your head as infinite, thinking will not be there. Thinking can exist +only in a very narrow mind. The narrower it is, the better for thinking. The greater the +mind, the less the thinking, and when the mind becomes total space, there is no thinking +at all. + +Buddha is sitting under his Bodhi tree. Can you imagine what he is thinking? He is not +thinking at all. His head is the whole cosmos. He has become spacious, infinitely +spacious. This technique is good for those who can imagine, it will not be good for all. +For those who can imagine, and for whom the imagination becomes so real that you +cannot really say whether it is imagination or real, it will work. Otherwise it will not be +of much use. But don’t be afraid, because at least thirty per cent of people are capable of +such imagination. These people are very powerful. + +If your mind is not very educated it will be easy for you to imagine. If it is educated then +the creativity is lost, then your mind is just a storage space, a bank. And the whole + + + +education system is a banking system. They go on banking and dumping stuff onto you. +Whatsoever they feel has to be dumped onto you, they do. They use your mind for +storage-then you cannot imagine. Then whatsoever you do is just repeating that which +has been taught to you. + +So those who are uneducated, they can use this technique very easily. And those who +have come out of university without being distorted by it, they can also use it. + +Those who are really still alive, even after so much education, they can do it. Women can +do it more easily than men. All those who are imaginative, dreamers, they can do it very +easily. + +But how to know whether you can do it or not? + +You can do a small experiment before entering it. Just lock both your hands together and +close your eyes. For five minutes, any time, relax in a chair, lock both your hands +together, and just imagine that the hands are so locked that even if you try, you cannot +open them. It will look absurd to you because they are not locked but you just go on +imagining that they are. + +For five minutes go on thinking, and then say three times in your mind, "Now I will try to +open my hands but I know it is impossible. They are locked and they cannot be opened." +Then try to open them. Thirty per cent of you will not be able to open your hands. They +will be really locked, and the more you try, the more you will feel that it is impossible. +You will start perspiring — you cannot open your own hands. Then this method is for +you. Then you can try this method. + +If you can easily open your hands and nothing has happened, this method is not for you. +You will not be able to do it. But don’t get scared if your hands do not open, and don’t try +too much, because the more you try, the more difficult it will be. Just close your eyes +again and imagine that now your hands are unlocked. + +You will need five minutes again to go on imagining that when you try to open them, +they will open immediately. + +Unlock the same way as you locked them, just through imagination. And if this is +possible, that your hands become locked just by imagination and you yourself cannot +open them, then this technique will work miracles for you. And in these one hundred and +twelve techniques there are many which work with imagination. For all those techniques +this hand-locking experiment will be good. Just remember, experiment whether or not the +technique is for you. + +CONSIDER ANY AREA OF YOUR PRESENT FORM AS LIMITLESSLY +SPACIOUS. Any area.... You can consider the whole body. Just close your eyes and +consider that the whole body is spreading, spreading, spreading, and then the boundaries +are lost. It has become infinite. What will happen? You cannot even conceive of what +will happen. If you can conceive that you have become the cosmos — that is the meaning, +the infinite — all that is bound up with your ego will not be found there. Your name, your +identity, all will be lost. Your poorness or richness, your health or your disease, your +miseries — all will be lost, because they are part of the finite body. With an infinite body +they cannot exist. And once you know this, come back to your finite body. But now you +can laugh. And even in the finite you can have the sense, the feel of the infinite. + + +Then you can carry it. + +Try. And it will be good if you try from the head, because that is the base of all illness. + + + +Close your eyes, lie down on the ground or sit on a chair and relax. Just look within the +head. Feel the walls of the head spreading, expanding. If you feel that it will be very +staggering, then try it slowly. First think that your head has come to occupy the whole +room. You will actually feel your skin touching the walls. If you can lock your hands, +this will happen. You will feel the coolness of the walls which your skin is touching. You +will feel the pressure. + +Go on moving. Your head has gone beyond — now the house has come within your head, +then the whole town has come within your head. Go on spreading. Within three months, +slowly, you can come to the point where the sun rises in your head, it starts moving in +your head. Your head has become infinite. This will give you a deep freedom such as you +have never known. And all the misery that belongs to this narrow mind will disappear. In +such a state, Upanishadic seers could say, 'AHAM BRAHMASMI’ — "I am the Divine, I +am the Absolute." In such ecstasy 'ANALAHAK' was uttered. + +Mansoor cried in ecstasy, "ANALAHAK, ANALAHAK — I am the God." + +Mohammedans couldn’t understand him. Really, no sectarian will be able to understand +such things. They thought he had gone mad, but he was not mad, he was the sanest +person possible. + +They thought he had become an egoist. He said, "I am the God." So they killed him. +While he was being killed, with his hands cut off, he was laughing and he was saying, +"ANALAHAK, AHAM BRAHMASMI — I am the God." Someone asked, "Mansoor, +why are you laughing? You are being murdered." He said, "You cannot murder me. I am +the whole." + +You can murder only a part. How can you murder the whole? Whatsoever you do to it +cannot make any difference. + +Mansoor is reported to have said, "If you really wanted to kill me, you should have come +at least ten years before. Then I was. Then you could have killed me, but now you cannot +kill me, because I am no more. I myself have killed the ego which you could have killed +and murdered." + +Mansoor was practising certain Sufi methods of this type, the type in which one goes on +expanding until the expanse becomes so infinite that one is no more. Then the whole is +and the individual is not. In these past few decades, these past two or three decades in the +West, psychedelic drugs have become very significant. And the attraction is really one of +expansion, because under the influence of the drug your narrowness, your limitations, are +lost. But it is a chemical change, nothing spiritual happens out of it. It is just a forced +violence on the system — you force the system to break. + +You can have a glimpse that you are no longer confined to anything, that you have +become infinite, liberated. + +But this is because of the chemical enforcement. Once back, you will be again in the +narrow body, and now this body will feel more narrow than before. Again you will be +confined to the same imprisonment, but now the imprisonment will be more intolerable +because you have had a glimpse. And because that glimpse was through a chemical you +are not master of it, you will become a slave, you will become addicted. Now you will +need it more and more. + +This technique is a spiritual psychedelic. If you practise it, a spiritual change will take +place which will not be chemical and of which you will be the master. + +Take it as a criterion: if you are the master, then the thing is spiritual. If you are the slave, + + + +then beware — the thing may appear to be spiritual, but it cannot be. Anything that +becomes addictive, powerful, enslaving, imprisoning, is leading you towards more +slavery, more 'unfreedom' — whatsoever the appearance. + +So take it as a criterion that whatsoever you do, your mastery must grow through it. You +must become more and more the master of it. It is said, and I repeat it again and again, +that when meditation has really happened to you, you will not need to do it. If you still +need to do it, it has not yet really happened. Because that too has become a slavery. Even +meditation must disappear. A moment must come when you need not do anything. Then +just as you are, you are Divine; just as you are, you are the bliss, the ecstasy. + +But this technique is good for expansion, for expanding the consciousness. Before trying +it, try the hand-locking experiment, so that you can feel. If your hands become locked, +you have a very creative imagination, it is not impotent. Then you can work miracles +through it. + + +THE END. + + + +Chapter 66: Enlightenment -- the most ordinary + + +The first question: + +Question 1 + +LAST NIGHT YOU SAID THAT WHEN THERE ARE NO THOUGHTS IN THE +MIND, THE MIND BECOMES AN EMPTY SPACE AND THE DOORS TO ALL THE +MYSTERIES ARE OPENED. I FEEL THIS INNER SPACE DEEPLY AND CLEARLY +BUT THERE IS NOTHING SPECIAL THAT I FEEL AS MYSTERY. + +WILL YOU EXPLAIN WHAT YOU MEAN BY THE MYSTERY AND HOW IT IS +FELT? + +The inner emptiness itself is the mystery. You cannot feel it and you cannot know it. You +become it. You are IT. When the inner space is there, then you are not. You cannot +observe it. If you observe it, then the inner space has not yet appeared. Who will observe +it? If you can observe it you are separate from it, so it is not inner, it is outer. It is 'out' to +you. The inner has not yet become empty, it is filled. The ego is there — in a very subtle +form; as an observer or onlooker, it is there. The inner is not empty yet, because when the +inner is empty, you are not. + +So the first thing to remember is that you will not be a witness to the mystery, you will be +the mystery. You will not be able to observe it because you cannot be separate, there +cannot be any duality. + +One thing... when the inner is really empty, you are not, because you are the thing by +which the inner is filled. Because of you it is not empty; because of you the space is +covered, occupied. When you dissolve, when you simply disappear, only then the inner +emptiness is there. + +So you will not be a witness to the mystery. Until you are not, the mystery will not be +revealed; when you are not, the mystery will be revealed. So if you say that you feel +inner emptiness it means you are not the emptiness; emptiness is something that is +happening to you, around you, but you are not empty. So really this emptiness is just a +'thought' of emptiness — that is why you can say that now your inner space has become +empty. This is a thought: this emptiness is not real, this emptiness is just part of the mind. +The observer is there so the object must be there. You can make emptiness an object, a +thought. + +It is reported that Bokuju became empty like this. He must have come across this type of +emptiness. He came to his master and he said, "Now there is nothing, I have become +empty." The master said, "Go out and throw this nothingness also. This nothingness is +still something, why are you carrying it? If you have really become nothing you will not +be able to report it. Who will carry it? Who will feel in it a certain achievement?" The +master said to Bokuju, "You have done well, you have become empty, now go and throw +out this emptiness also." + +You can be filled with emptiness — that is the problem. And if you are filled with +emptiness you are not empty. + +The second thing... what do I mean by mystery? Whatsoever you understand, I don’t +mean, because you think that a mystery will be something very amazing, staggering, +shocking, that you will be thrown off the ground. + + + +That is not the point. Mystery is the simple pure existence with nothing amazing about it, +nothing staggering. You will not be pushed aside, not thrown, not shocked, not puzzled. +Mystery is nothing mysterious really. This very ordinary existence — accept it as it is +without creating any problem. When you don't create a problem this existence is the +mystery; when you create the problem you are destroying the mystery. Now you are in +search of a solution, some answer. The same mind goes on. If you hear me talking about +the mystery then you think about something very special. There is nothing special in +existence. Only for the ego does the word 'special' exist. + +It is reported that when Lin Chi achieved enlightenment he laughed. His disciples asked, +"Why are you laughing?" He said, "I am laughing for this. I was endeavoring for +thousands and thousands of lives for this — it is so ordinary." + +This is the mystery — nothing special. + +It is said of Do-zen, another Zen master, that when he achieved enlightenment disciples +asked him, "What was the first thing that you wanted to do after it?" Do-zen is reported +to have said, "I wanted a cup of tea." + +It was so ordinary. But for the ego these things are not appealing. If I say that +enlightenment is so ordinary that you would like to have a cup of tea after it, then you +will feel that the whole thing is nonsense — why endeavor? Then the ego comes in. + +The ego wants something special, something rare, something that does not usually +happen, that has happened only to you, which has not happened to just anyone. The ego +wants something special, extraordinary. + +Reality is not extraordinary; it is happening everywhere. And if it has not happened to +you than that is special! Because it is there, always present. Not for a single moment is it +absent. Enlightenment is happening every moment, it is the very core of existence — but +you are deaf and blind. It is nothing special. + +To be a Buddha, to be enlightened, is the most ordinary phenomenon. When I say +'ordinary' I mean: it must be so. If it looks very extraordinary it is because of you, +because you create so many hurdles — and you love them. First you create the obstacle, +and then you try to cross it. And then you feel very elated. In the first place, there is no +obstacle. But your ego will not feel good — you must create a long route to come to the +point that was the nearest, the most intimate one. And you had never missed it! + +So don’t seek something mysterious. Just be simple and innocent. And then the whole +existence opens to you. You will not go mad, you can simply smile at the absurdity of the +whole thing that was so near but you could not attain it. And there was no barrier. It was, +in a sense, always within you. It was a miracle how you went on missing it. + + +If the emptiness is real, all that is there, the whole of it, the reality, will be opened to you. +Not that it is closed right now, it is open. You are closed. Your mind is occupied. When +your mind is empty, unoccupied, you will be open to it, and there will be a meeting. And +then everything is beautiful in its total ordinariness. Hence it is said that one who has +known becomes absolutely ordinary. He is one with the reality. To be hankering for the +special is the way of the ego, and all the ways of the ego create gaps and distances +between you and the real. Be empty and everything will have happened to you. + +Not that you will have must to report: there is nothing to be reported. It is thought that +Buddhas and Krishnas or those who have attained the ultimate, cannot describe it because +it is so simple. Complex things can be described, remember. Simple things cannot be + + + +described. The more complex a thing is, the easier the description is, because in a +complexity you can divide, contrast, compare. With a simple thing you cannot do +anything. + +For example, if I ask you, "What is yellow?" what will you say? Yellow is so simple, +there is nothing complex about it. If I ask, "What is water?" you can say, "H20." It is +complex: there is hydrogen, there is oxygen, so you can define it. But if I ask you, "What +is yellow?" at the most you can say that yellow is yellow. + +But that is a tautology, it makes no sense. What will you do if I say, "What is yellow?" +You may indicate a yellow flower, you may indicate a yellow sun rising, but you are not +saying anything, you are indicating. + +A simple thing can only be indicated; a complex thing can be defined, divided, analyzed. +Buddhas are silent, not because they have encountered a very complex reality, they are +silent because of a phenomenon so simple that it can only be indicated, not defined. So +they can lead you towards it but they cannot say anything about it. + +That mystery is not a complex thing, it is very simple, the simplest possible. But you can +only meet with it when you have also become simple. If you are complex, you cannot +meet it. There is no meeting ground. Only when you have become simple, totally simple, +innocent, empty, the reality and you meet. Then there is a reflection of it in you. It echoes +in you. It enters into you. + +But don’t wait for anything special. Nirvana is nothing special. When I say this, what is +happening to your mind? When I say this nirvana is nothing special, what do you feel? +How do you feel? You feel a little disappointed. In the mind the question must be arising +— then why struggle? Then why make any effort? Then why meditate? Then why these +techniques? + +Look at that mind, that mind is the problem. The mind wants something special. + +And because of that desire the mind goes on creating special things. In reality there is +nothing special: either the whole of reality is special or nothing is special. + +Because of this desire, the mind has created heavens, paradises. And it is not satisfied +with one, it goes on creating many. Christians have one heaven, Hindus have seven — +because there are so many good people, there must be a hierarchy. The supreme good, +where should they go? There is no end to it. In Buddha's days there was a sect who +believed in seven hundred heavens. You have to place the egos: the highest ego must go +to the highest heaven. + +I was looking at a book of the Radha swamis. They say there are many divisions — +fourteen divisions. Only their guru has reached to the last. Buddha is somewhere in the +seventh, Krishna somewhere in the fifth, Mohammed somewhere in the third. Only their +guru has reached to the fourteenth. And everyone else is given a place, categorized. Only +their guru is special. This is the desire to be special. And everyone is according to his +desire. + +I have heard an anecdote. In a Sunday school the priest was giving a religious lesson to +the very small boys of the neighborhood. He talked much about what good people would +achieve — the crowns of glory and a heavenly reward. Those who are good would be +crowned in heaven. Then at the end of his talk he said, "Who will get the biggest +crown?" There was silence for a while, then a little boy, the hatmaker's son, stood up +confidently and said, "The one who has the biggest head." + + + +This is what we are all doing. Our definition of the biggest head may differ but we have a +conception of something special in the end, and because of that 'special' we go on +moving. But remember, because of that 'special' you are not moving anywhere at all, you +are moving in desires. And a movement in desire is not a progress, it is circular. + +If you can still meditate — knowing well that nothing special is going to happen, that you +will just come to a reconciliation with the ordinary reality, that you will be in harmony +with this ordinary reality — if with this mind you can meditate, then enlightenment is +possible this very moment. But with this mind you won't feel like meditating — you will +say, "Leave everything if nothing special is going to happen." + +People come to me and they say, "I have been meditating for three months and nothing +has happened yet." A desire... and that desire is the barrier. It can happen in a single +moment if desire is not there. + +So don’t desire the mysterious. Really, don't desire anything. Just be at ease, at home with +reality as it is. Be ordinary — to be ordinary is wonderful. Because then there is no +tension, no anguish. To be ordinary is very mysterious because it is so simple. To me, +meditation is a play, a game; it is not a work. But to you it goes on being work; you think +in terms of work. + +It will be good to understand the distinction between work and play. + +Work is end-oriented, not enough in itself. It must lead somewhere, to some happiness, to +some goal, to some end. It is a bridge, a means. In itself it is meaningless. The meaning is +hidden in the goal. + +Play is totally different. There is no goal to it, or, it itself is the goal. Happiness is not +beyond it, outside it; to be in it is to be happy. It will not give you any happiness outside +of it, there is no meaning beyond it — all that is there is intrinsic, internal. You play, not +because of any reason, but because you enjoy it right now. It is purposeless. + +That's why only children can play really; the more you grow, the less capable you +become of playing. Because of more and more purpose, more and more you ask why, +why should I play? More and more you become end-oriented: something must be +achieved through it, in itself it has no meaning. Intrinsic value loses meaning for you. +Only children can play because they don't think of the future. They can be here +timelessly. + +Work is time; play is timeless. Meditation must be like play, not end-oriented. You must +not meditate to achieve something because then the whole point is lost. Y ou cannot +meditate at all if you are meditating for something. You can meditate only if you are +playing with it, enjoying it, if nothing is to be achieved out of it, if it is beautiful in itself. +Meditation for meditation's sake. + +.. then it becomes timeless. And then the ego cannot arise. + +Without desire, you cannot project yourself into the future, without desire you cannot +start expectations, and without desire you will never be disappointed. Without desire, +time really disappears: you move from one moment of eternity to another moment of +eternity. There is no sequence... and then you will never ask why nothing special is +happening. + +For myself, I have not come to know the mystery yet. The very play is the mystery; being +timeless, desireless, is the mystery. And to be ordinary is the 'goal', if you allow me to +use the word. To be ordinary is the goal. If you can be ordinary you are liberated, then + + + +there is no S ANSAR for you, no world for you. + +This whole world is a struggle to be extraordinary. Some try it in politics, some try it in +economics, some try it in religion. But the lust remains the same. + +The second question: + +Question 2 + +NOT ONLY IN MEDITATION BUT IN ROUTINE LIFE ALSO, I CONSTANTLY +FEEL A ONENESS WITH THE EXISTENCE, EGOLESSNESS, TIMELESSNESS. +YET I FEEL MYSELF ORDINARY. AND I DO NOT FIND IN ME THE TOTAL +TRANSFORMATION ABOUT WHICH YOU TALK VERY OFTEN. + +This is good. This is the goal. You should not create a problem out of it. You should +relax and be ordinary. + +But why do you feel it? Why do you feel that you remain ordinary? Somewhere there +must be the desire to be extraordinary, to be not ordinary. + +Only in contrast to that can you feel ordinary, and then a certain sadness will follow. But +why not be ordinary? What do I mean when I say, "Be ordinary?" I mean that whatsoever +the case is — be. + +One young man came to me just a few days ago, and he said, "I am an egoist and +whenever I listen to you, I feel that I am wrong. So how to be egoless?" I told him, "You +be simply egoistic, and accept the fact that you are so and don't struggle. Don't try to be +egoless. You are an egoist, so feel it and be it." + +He felt very disappointed because really he was searching for a new way for the ego. He +was searching for egolessness. And I said, "Be whatsoever you are," so that that desire +would be cut and the ego couldn’t move. And I told him, "For three months don't come to +me and don’t fight the ego — accept it, it is there. It is part of you, it is how you are. Don’t +fight with it, and don’t think in terms of the contrary, how to be egoless, because that is +the way of the ego. Accept it. Acceptance is the death." + +But the young man said, "But every religion says be egoless, and I want to be egoless." +Who is this' I’ that wants to be egoless? The ways of the ego are very subtle. When I was +talking to him I felt he was not listening to me. If I gave him some technique to do to be +egoless, he would be ready and accepting, receptive, because then the ego could start +work. + +But I was saying, "Don’t talk about egolessness, just be whatsoever you are. And for +three months don’t struggle, then come to me." + +He tried. After three months he came again and he said to me, "It has been very hard to +accept, but because you told me, I tried. Now give me some technique, give me some key +to go beyond this ego." The whole effort was false, because if you accept then there is no +desire to go beyond. + +Whenever you feel yourself to be ordinary you try to be extraordinary in some way. But +everyone is ordinary: to be ordinary is to be real. It may be that to you someone looks +extraordinary because you compare him with yourself, but a genius in himself is as +ordinary as anybody, and he feels himself ordinary. A rose flower is ordinary, a lotus +flower is ordinary, but if the rose starts comparing and starts thinking about how to be a +lotus flower then problems arise. And if the lotus starts thinking about the beautiful +perfume that comes from the rose flower, then the rose flower becomes extraordinary. +When you compare, in comparison extraordinariness happens — otherwise everything is + + + +ordinary. In itself everything is as it is. Don’t compare and don’t hanker after it. If you +hanker then meditation will disappoint you, because meditation will bring you to a point +where you feel your total ordinariness. Be receptive to it, welcome it. It is good. + +It shows that meditation is progressing, deepening. But somewhere the desire for the +extraordinary is still there and that is creating the barrier. + +If that desire disappears, you will not feel yourself as ordinary. You will simply be. How +can you feel that you are ordinary? You will simply be, and to be, to be so simple that +you don’t feel whether you are ordinary or extraordinary, is to attain. + +It is good, don’t be disappointed by it. If you are disappointed then remember that you are +carrying a desire, and that desire is creating poison. Why is there this madness? Why +does it come and happen to everyone? This whole world is mad because of this: everyone +is trying to be something special, somebody. + +Life happens to you only when you are nobody. When you are so empty that there is no +one, then the whole of life flows through you without any barrier, without any obstacle, +without any hindrance. Then the flow is total and complete. + +When you are somebody, you become a rock, you disturb the flow — life cannot move +through you. There is a struggle, a resistance, and of course you create much noise. And +you may think that because you are creating so much noise that you are something +extraordinary. + +Be an empty vessel, passage, with no resistance, so that life can flow through it, flow +through it easily. Then no noise will be created. You may not be able to feel that you are, +because you only feel that you are when you fight. + +The more you fight, the more you feel. + +Life flows so smoothly through you that you may even completely forget that you exist. +There is no barrier, no resistance, no rejection, no negation. And you are so welcoming +that you even forget that you are. + +It was heard about one Zen master that he would call his own name many times during +the day. In the morning he would call, "Bokuju?" and then he would say, "Yes sir, I am +here." Bokuju was his name. And his disciples would ask why he did this. He would say, +"I go on forgetting. I have become so smooth that I have to remind myself — 'Bokuju?' +And then I say, 'Yes sir, I am here.’" + +Life can become such a smooth flow, such a silent river, that no noise is created. But if +you are bent upon being something, somebody, extraordinary, special, then life cannot +flow through you. Then there is a constant struggle between life and you, between your +small ego and the cosmos. + +This is creating madness. The whole earth has become a mad planet. And this madness +cannot be helped by treatments, therapies, because it is so basic a style of life that it is not +a pathology. This is how we are living. Our whole style of life is mad. So you cannot be +helped through therapies unless the whole life-style changes. + +There are only two life-styles: ego-oriented and egoless-oriented. You must be +somebody... this is one way of life. + +Then madness is the outcome. Really, the madman is the most extraordinary man. He has +achieved extraordinariness because now he is completely uprooted from reality, he is not +concerned with the reality at all. Now he lives isolated in himself, he has created his own +world. Now the dream is the real and the real has become just a dream. Everything is + + + +upside down. + +You cannot convince a madman that he is wrong, because he is very logical. Madmen are +very rational and logical. + +One madman used to come out of his house every day in the morning and chant some +mantras and make some gestures. So, whosoever was passing would ask, naturally, what +he was doing. And the madman would say, "I am protecting this neighborhood from +ghosts." So the person who was asking would say, "But there are no ghosts in this +neighborhood." And the man would say, "See, because of my chanting mantras, there are +no ghosts." + +He is rational, you cannot convince him — ghosts are not there because of his chanting. +But he lives now in his own subjective dream-world and you cannot pull him out. + +If you think yourself somebody — nobody can be somebody that is not in the nature of +things — but if you think yourself somebody, then a part of you has gone mad. That +somebodiness is your madness. And the more this cancer of somebodiness grows, the +more you will be cut off from reality. + +A Buddha is a nobody. + +All his doors are open. The wind comes and blows, the rains come and blow, the sun-rays +enter and pass, the life flows, but he is not there. This is what I mean when I say +meditation has happened to you. And this is very ordinary, natural, real. + +The third question: + +Question 3 + +YOU ARE OFTEN SAYING THAT THIS IS GOOD OR BAD, OR THIS IS RIGHT OR +WRONG. IS THIS A LANGUAGE JUST FOR US AS WE ARE NOT ABLE TO +REALIZE THE ONENESS OF EVERYTHING, OR IS THERE SUCH A THING AS +GOOD AND BAD? + +No, it is simply a language. For me there is nothing good and nothing bad. But this will +be too dangerous for you. Truth can be dangerous. Really, only truth can be dangerous — +lies are never so dangerous because they are not potential. They have no force in them. +Truth can be very shattering. It is the truth that there is no good, no bad, that nothing is +right, nothing is wrong. Everything is as it is, all condemnation, division, is futile — but +this will be dangerous for you. This will be too much for you, you will misunderstand it. +You cannot understand it; when there is nothing good, nothing bad, you cannot +understand it, and you will have your own interpretation of it. + +If I say there is nothing good, nothing bad, you will think that now whatsoever you have +been thinking of up to now as bad, there is no need to think of it as such. So it will +become a licence for you and you will start double thinking. + +You will think that for yourself there is nothing good, nothing bad, but for others you will +not allow the same. If you can allow the same for others also, then you have understood; +then it is not a licence, it is a freedom. But the mind must be one; there should not be +double standards. + +Why do I say that there is nothing good and nothing bad? Because goodness and badness +are interpretations, they are not reality. + +If there is a flower outside in the garden, you can call it beautiful and somebody else can +call it ugly. The flower is neither. The flower exists there as it is in its authenticity. And it +is not bothered about your interpretations. But to you it is either beautiful or not. That +beauty and ugliness is interpretation, not reality. It is your mind which says that it is + + + +beautiful or ugly. The flower will not be affected by it, but you will be. If you say that it +is beautiful, your behavior will be of one kind; if you say that it is ugly, your behavior +will be different. You will be affected by your interpretation. + +And I am talking to you, so I have to constantly remember that whatsoever I say, your +behavior will be affected. Unless you come to a point where the whole emphasis has +changed from doing to being, when you are not interested in doing and you are only +interested in being, you cannot understand what I mean when I say that there is nothing +good or bad. + +Things are as they are. + +But it is only possible to understand this when you are deeply centered in the being. And +if you are centered in the being, then whatsoever you do will be good. Then there is no +danger. But right now you are not centered in the being, you are centered on the +periphery. You are continuously choosing what to do and what not to do. + +Really, you have not asked the question, "What to be?" You have always been asking +what to do and what not to do and whether it will be good or not. Y ou never ask the +question, "What to be?" And unless being becomes more important than doing, there is +good and there is bad — for you. Then something has to be done and something has not to +be done. + +How do I make this difference and why? If there is really no good and no bad then how +and why is this difference made? + +To me, this is again a difference I make for you: I call something good if it leads to your +being, where everything will become good, and I call something bad if it leads you away +from the being. If you go on being away from yourself, everything will become bad. + +To help you to come to yourself, to your home, I call something good and bad, or, +something right and wrong. It is better to use the words 'right’ and 'wrong’ than the words +'good’ and 'bad’ because I am more concerned with techniques of how to bring yourself +to your being. + +So, a technique can be right if it brings you to your being; a technique can be wrong if it +doesn’t bring you to your being or if it becomes a hindrance, or moves you into by-paths, +or moves you on ways which will become cul-de-sacs and will not lead you anywhere. +But if you ask me, ultimately there is nothing good, nothing bad, nothing right, nothing +wrong. And if you can understand this right now, then start living in a way where nothing +is wrong and nothing is right — and this is for you as far as you are concerned with +others, and for others as far as they are concerned with you. + +Jesus says, "Do unto others as you would like them to do unto you." This is the basic +principle of 'one standard’ and this is the whole of the teaching of all those who want to +help you to come to yourself — there is one standard where nothing is good and nothing +is bad, not only for you but for everyone. + +It is easy to say that to steal is not bad if you are stealing, but if someone else is stealing +something from you then it becomes difficult to say that stealing is not bad. + +I have heard about a thief. For the fourth time he was caught and the judge asked him, +"You get caught again and again, what is the matter? If you are not so efficient, why go +on doing it?" The man said, "It is not a question of efficiency. I am alone and the work is +too much." So the judge said, "Then why don’t you have a companion, a partner?" The +thief said, "Morals have become so low that you cannot depend on any partner." + + + +Even a thief thinks in terms of morality, for others — "Morals have gone so low that you +cannot depend on a partner. So I have to do all the work myself and the work is too +much." + +This is the deepest teaching of all the knowers: there is nothing to choose. Everything is +accepted. If you can accept it in its totality, you are transfonned. But if you are cunning +and want to deceive yourself, then this total acceptability will be dangerous. + +So, I say many things to you just because of you. And just in-between I also go on +communicating that which I would really like to say to you. But it can be given only very +indirectly. You are so dangerous, so suicidal, that you can commit something which will +be harmful to you. + +I am talking about a higher truth — not only a higher truth, but an ultimate truth. Naropa, +in his song, says that only an inch difference sets heaven and hell apart. An inch +difference between what is good and what is bad sets heaven and hell apart. + +And you will have to live in anguish because you have created the division. Bring all the +dualities nearer, closer, and let them merge. Let the good and bad merge into each other, +the darkness and the light merge into each other, life and death merge into each other. +Then there is ADVAIT, then there is oneness. That oneness brings freedom, +transfonnation. + +The fourth question: + +Question 4 + +IT IS OUR IMAGINATION, THROUGH AUTO-SUGGESTIONS, THAT HAS +ESTABLISHED US IN THE WORLD OF THE FINITE, IN THE WORLD OF NAMES +AND FORMS, IN THE WORLD OF PAINS AND PLEASURES. + +CAN THE SAME INSTRUMENT BE USED TO REACH THE INFINITE, THE +ABSOLUTE, THE BLISSFUL? THE SAME INSTRUMENT IN THE REVERSE +ORDER? + +You have come to this house, soon you will be going back, and the same path will be +used again — but in the reverse order. While you were coming here your face was +towards me and when you go back, your back will be towards me. But the path will be +the same. No other path is needed to go back home. Only the direction changes. + +The way which you have traveled to come into darkness will be the way, is the way, the +only way. You will have to travel back that way. The way that has brought you into +misery and anguish will be the way which will lead you towards bliss and ecstasy. There +is no other way, there is no need. And remember, don’t follow any other way otherwise +you will never reach home. + +You have to be alert to follow the same path again. The only change is in the direction — +it is a total about-turn. Hypnosis, auto-suggestion, they create this world; de-hypnosis, +de-auto-suggestion will lead you back to the real. There is no finite world, the world is +infinite. It is your super-imposition, your hypnosis, that makes it look finite. Withdraw +your hypnosis and the world is infinite — it has always been so. + +All techniques of meditation are similar to hypnosis. This creates a problem. It creates a +problem when people go on asking about the difference between hypnosis and +meditation. + +There is no difference. The path is the same but the direction is different. + + + +In hypnosis you are falling more and more asleep, losing awareness; in meditation you +are coming out of sleep, gaining awareness. It is the same path. In hypnosis you are +conditioning yourself, in meditation you are unconditioning yourself — but the process is +the same. Meditation is hypnosis in reverse. So whatsoever you have done with yourself +you have to undo it. That's all. + +Try to do a very simple experiment which will be revealing: you can hypnotize yourself. +Close your room and make it completely dark, then put a small candle just in front of +your eyes. Then without blinking your eyes, stare at the flame, and just go on thinking +that you are falling asleep, you are falling asleep. A deep sleep is descending upon you — +just let this thought be floating there, within. Go on staring at the candle and let this +thought be there as a cloud hovering over you. You are falling asleep, you are falling +asleep. When you do it, you have to say, "I am falling asleep. Sleep is descending. My +limbs are relaxing." + +You will immediately feel a subtle change, and within three minutes you will feel that the +body has become heavy. Any moment you can fall. The lids of the eyes are heavy and +now it is very difficult to go on staring at the flame. The eyes want to close. Everything +has become numb. + + +Now you can feel that this is what hypnosis is: being more sleepy, falling into +unawareness, becoming more unconscious. Feel the feel of it, what is happening, how +your mind has become cloudy. The clarity has gone, aliveness has gone, you are +becoming dead. Your body feels more weighty. This will give you the sensation of how +your consciousness can become unconsciousness. + +Try this for seven days so that you can feel completely what it is, and how you descend +into the well. With more and more darkness, more sleep, more unconsciousness, at the +last moment suddenly you will not be there and the flame will have disappeared. You are +fast asleep. You can feel the grave. + +Then after one week try the other experiment. Have the same room, the same flame, the +same way of staring, but a different thought in the mind, "I will become more alert, I am +becoming more and more alert, more alive, more alert. The body is becoming more and +more weightless." Let this thought be there and go on staring at the flame — you will feel +a sudden surge of life awareness and consciousness. + +Within seven days you can come to a point where you will feel so alert that you will feel +as if the body is not. On one pole the whole spectrum is deep sleep where you forget +yourself completely; on the other pole there is deep awareness where everything is +forgotten, you remember only yourself. + + +Then there are many mid-stages. The stage we are in is just in the middle — half asleep, +half awake. So whatsoever you do, you are doing it half asleep, half awake. Both the +processes are the same, they are the same process. + +Thought in an intense state becomes reality; thought condensed becomes a thing. One +thought kept continuously in the consciousness transforms you, becomes a seed. So if +you are struggling to be more and more alert, you are deconditioning yourself, moving in +the other direction. Gurdjieff calls it self-remembering — he says, "Continuously +remember yourself." Buddha says, "Don't forget yourself whatsoever you are doing; +continuously go on hammering that you are doing it." And he is so particular that he says + + + +to his monks, "While you are walking and your left foot comes up, remember that your +left foot is coming up: now the foot is going down, now the right one is coming up, now +the right is going down. Remember that the breath is coming in, that the breath is going +out. Remember continuously, whatsoever is happening and use every happening as a +situation to remember. Don’t do anything in an unconscious state, a sleepy state." And +Buddha says that this is enough. If you can work like this for twenty-four hours, sooner +or later you will have de-hypnotized yourself. You will have become aware, alert. +Hypnosis and meditation are the same process in diametrically opposite directions. + +You can use hypnosis to awaken you; you can use hypnosis to fall deep into sleep. And if +you become master of the art of hypnosis, you have got the key to open all the doors of +life. + +If you are not the master of the key of hypnosis, then you are a victim of many, many +forces. This is worth understanding: if you don't know what hypnosis is then you are a +victim. Everybody is trying hypnosis on you — I say everybody! They may not be doing +it knowingly, but everybody is trying. There are different ways, methods. The whole +world is filled with hypnotic tricks: the same advertisement in the newspaper, on the +television and on the radio. It goes on hammering, it becomes a hypnotic thing. + +In the mind you go on repeating, "Lux is the best soap." You go on repeating it. + +Wherever you move it is written on the walls; in films you see it, on the T.V. screen it is +there, on the radio it is there, in magazines, in newspapers, in anything: "Lux Toilet +Soap." It goes on and on. You become hypnotized by it. Then you go to the shop and the +man behind the counter asks you, "What soap do you need?" You say, "Lux Toilet +Soap." You are asleep. You are not saying it consciously, it has been hammered in and +now it is built in. + +Crores of rupees are spent on advertising just to hypnotize you. Those advertisements +have to be repeated continuously. Repetition is the way. Then there is imprint, and you +become unconscious about it; then suddenly it comes out of your mouth, "Lux Toilet +Soap." + +And you think that you are choosing. You are not the chooser. + +The whole education system is hypnotic. That's why for the teacher a higher place is +needed. It must be measured scientifically because there is a particular point — the way I +am sitting here is at a wrong point, this is not right. Your eyes should be in a tension +looking at me, in much tension, not relaxed — then you are easily hypnotized. + +Hitler used every proportion. He had an expert committee to measure how much distance +from the audience and how much height was needed so that the eyes are correctly at a +tension where they become easily hypnotized and sleepy. And then all the lights would +be put off — in Hitler's lecture hall the only lights would be on Hitler. Nobody could see +anywhere else, and so you were forced to look only at him. In a particular situation a +particular tension was created. In this tension he would go on saying something for a +while. The things that he wanted to put into you would be said later on, when the whole +audience had become sleepy. Then the words would simply move into the unconscious +and start functioning. + +Now they have invented subliminal advertisements in films. As you watch a film, +between two scenes, just for a fraction of a second, the advertisement will be flashed. + +You will not be able to read it, you will not even know what has happened. Simply +watching the film, suddenly for a few seconds the advertisement will be there — but you + + + +will not be continuously aware of it. + + +Only two persons in a hundred can feel that something has happened. Only those who +have very keen eyes can feel that something was in-between. Ninety-eight per cent will +not feel it, but the unconscious has read it. It has entered you. + +There was one experiment about it in an American film. They flashed a particular brand +of cold drink on the screen, something new. Only two per cent of the people became +aware that there was an advertisement, ninety-eight per cent were fully unaware, but in +the interval many people went out and asked for the drink. They were not aware that +there had been an advertisement because it had been so fast. + +Hypnosis is all around. Education uses it, politics uses it, the market uses it — everyone is +using it. And if you are not aware then you are a victim. Become aware. If you become +aware, you can use it; not to hypnotize others, but to de-hypnotize yourself. And if you +can become completely de-hypnotized, you are free, you are liberated. + +And there is no conflict between meditation and hypnosis. The conflict is in the +directions — the process is the same. + + +THE END. + + + +Chapter 67: Neither mind nor matter + + +FEEL YOUR SUBSTANCE, BONES, FLESH, BLOOD, SATURATED WITH THE +COSMIC ESSENCE. + +FEEL THE FINE QUALITIES OF CREATIVITY PERMEATING YOUR BREASTS’ +AND ASSUMING DELICATE CONFIGURATIONS. + +Philosophers all over the world have been arguing for centuries about what basic stuff the +universe is made of, what the substance is. There have been propositions, systems, that +say that matter is the basic reality and mind is just an outgrowth, that matter is basic and +mind is just a by-product, that mind is also material, only subtle. Charwak proposed this +in India, Epicurus in Greece, and even today, Marxists and other materialists go on +talking in terms of matter. Just opposite to this, there has been a second system of +thinking which says that mind rather than matter is the basic stuff, and that matter is +nothing but a form of mind. Vedanta and other idealist philosophies of the world have +reduced everything to mind. + +Just at the beginning of this century, it was thought that the materialists had become +victorious because physics and other scientific investigations were proving, or appeared +to be proving, that matter was the basic substance. But just two or three decades ago the +whole thing changed completely. One of the greatest scientists of this age, Eddington, +said, "Now we can say that the universe appears to be more like a thought than like a +thing." + +And as the physicists, Max Planck and Einstein, worked deeper, they came to realize that +the deeper one penetrates matter, the more matter disappears — something more than +matter, more beyond than matter, appears to be there. You can call it mind more easily +than matter because it is a form of energy. One thing is certain: it is not material in the +old sense at all. + +For Tantra, for yoga, there has been no choice. Tantra doesn't say that either matter or the +mind is the basic reality. Tantra has a third standpoint, and I think that that standpoint is +ultimately going to win. Tantra says mind and matter are both fonns of something which +we can call 'X'. Neither matter nor mind is substantial but a third entity, which exists in +both but which is not confined to either, is the real — these two are the manifestations. +Matter and mind are not realities, but forms of a third reality, a basic reality, which +remains hidden. Whenever it manifests itself, it manifests itself either as matter or as +mind. + +So the whole conflict between mind and matter, and their followers, is baseless, because +the ultimate substratum that physics has now come to know is really neither like matter +nor like mind. The division has disappeared, the duality has disappeared. The behavior of +the basic substance is very vague: sometimes it behaves like matter, and sometimes it +behaves like mind. + +You may be surprised to know that physics cannot say anything about individual atoms — +they are unpredictable, just like any human being. Nothing can be said about the +individual atom and how it is going to behave. It appears that it has a certain +independence; no causality can predict how it is going to behave. We can predict mass + + + +behavior, but we cannot predict the behavior of an individual atom. Sometimes it behaves +in cause-effect terms, like matter, and sometimes it behaves like mind, as if it has a will +of its own, as if it has a choice. + +With Tantra, this idea of physics fits very well. But why does Tantra say that the basic +reality is the third, the unknown, the 'X’? Not because Tantra is interested in propounding +any theory about reality, no. It is proposed just as a help for SADHANA, just as a help +for spiritual growth. If it is so — that the reality is the third, and mind and matter are just +two manifestations — then you can enter the reality through two doors: either from matter +or from mind. If you try to enter from matter, then there are certain techniques to use. +Hatha Yoga is a technique to enter the reality through matter, through the body. You +have to do something with the body, you have to transfonn the body, you have to +crystalize certain chemical phenomena in the body, and then you will enter into the +reality. + +Or, you can enter directly through the mind. + +Raja Yoga and other methods are used to enter through the mind. And for Tantra, both +are right. + +You cannot say to Tantra, "How can a body posture, a particular body posture, be helpful +to enter reality?" Tantra says it can be helpful. A certain body posture is not a mere body +posture, because body is the manifestation of the reality. So when you give your body a +certain posture, you are giving the reality a certain form. And there are postures with +which you can easily enter into yourself. A certain food can be helpful. A certain practice +of breathing can be helpful. These are material things — food, breathing, body. But you +can enter through them. + +And similar is the case with mind: just working with mind also you can enter. Many +times the question may have arisen in your mind about Shiva telling Parvati certain +techniques which look just imaginary. The question is bound to arise — how can +imagination be helpful? + +Even imagination is a mode of reality because the mind is a manifestation of reality. And +when you change the imagination in the mind, you are changing the mode of reality. For +Tantra nothing is unreal. Even a dream has its own reality — and it affects you. So a +dream is not a mere dream. A dream is as real as anything else because it affects you, it +changes you. Y ou are different because you dreamed it; you will never be the same +because a certain dream has happened. + +So if you dream that you are a thief, in the morning you will say that it makes no +different, it was just a dream. But for Tantra it is not so. A dream of stealing, of theft, has +changed you. Your reality is different in the morning; you cannot be the same. Whether +you recognize it or not, it has affected you. It will affect your behavior, your future — it +has become a seed. + +Even a dream is not irrelevant. And you think that dreams are just dreams. That is not so, +because you cannot create a dream consciously, you cannot choose a dream. It happens to +you as anything else happens to you. Can you choose a dream? Can you think about a +dream that you will dream tonight? Can you choose it? Can you will it? You cannot will +it, because to will a dream will need many changes in your reality. Only then will a +dream come. A dream is just like a flower. A rose flower comes on a rose bush, and you +cannot change the flower unless you change the whole process, from the seed onwards. +You cannot just change the flower. A dream is a flowering. If you can change the dream, + + + +you can change reality. + +So, many times, many techniques will appear imaginary — but they are also real. And +Tantra is trying to change your imagination. If the imagination can be changed, then the +hidden reality behind it will automatically be different. + +The techniques that we will discuss today start from your imagination, from your +dreaming, from your mind. + +Three things have to be remembered. One: whatsoever happens to your mind is not +superficial — it is happening because of you, it is happening because you happen to be in +a certain situation. So two things can be done: either change the situation, then you will +have to start from the body because body is the situation; or if you are not starting with +the situation, then change the happening. It will persist, it will not be easy to change it, +but if you make an effort and you go on making the effort, if you are stubborn and are not +defeated, then the very effort will change it. + +One thing is certain: you may not achieve the goal that you were thinking of, but the fact +that you make this effort will bring a change. You will be different: whether you succeed +or fail, you will be different. The very effort will be counted. + +Thirdly, don't think that mind is just mind, and don’t think that dreaming is just dreaming. +If you can direct your dreaming — and now there is a therapy in the West called 'Directed +Daydreaming’ — if you can direct your dreaming, you are directing yourself. And many +things will become different. + +There is an old Tibetan technique called 'The Lion's Roar'. If you are angry, sexual, filled +with hatred, jealousy, then the Tibetan master will give you this technique, 'The Lion's +Roar'. You have to sit before a mirror, and you are to imagine that you are a lion, not a +man. + +You have to make your face like a lion, you have to put your tongue out, and you have to +roar. And you have to practise it so that the imagination becomes so true that you forget +that you are a man daydreaming that he is a lion. And when the point comes when you +have really fallen prey to your own imagination, and you have become the lion, and a real +roar comes out of you, suddenly you are transformed. In that roar, all hatred, anger, sex, +disappears, and you will fall into a deep silence such as you have not known before. In +old Tibetan monasteries they have a special room with many mirrors. Whenever someone +is suffering from something like anger, hatred, or jealousy, he is to be sent to that +mirrored room and he has to remain there until he comes to a climax. And when he +comes to the climax, the whole monastery will know, because a real lion will be roaring +there. To us, he has gone mad. The whole monastery will gather and welcome the man, +and he will come out a totally different man. It may take three days, it may take seven +days. Food will be supplied to him, but he is not allowed to come out. He has to persist in +imagining that he is a lion, until from the very roots of the unconscious the roar comes. +The whole body is involved, every cell of it; every cell in it roars, and in that roar +everything is thrown out. It is the deepest catharsis possible. And you will never see that +man angry again because now the poison is not there. + +For the first time the face will become human. + +Your face cannot be human because so much is suppressed there. The jealousy, the +hatred, the anger that you have suppressed, is there — layers upon layers are just hidden +under the skin. They are making your face. But they can be released — just by this + + + +daydream, a directed daydream. + +In the West they now have another technique they call psychodrama. That too is one of +the oldest Buddhist methods — to become a part of a drama, to act it so totally that you +forget that you are simply acting. The acting becomes action, and you are not the actor, +you become a real doer in it. It changes you. + +Tantra says that if you can change dreaming, imagination, if you can change your mind +and the pattern of it, the reality behind will be different. Because it is deeply rooted in +reality, you can move through the mind. These techniques are just to change the way and +the style in which your mind has been behaving up to now. + +The first technique: + +FEEL YOUR SUBSTANCE, BONES, FLESH, BLOOD, SATURATED WITH THE +COSMIC ESSENCE. + +Try with simple experiments. For seven days try one simple experiment: feel your blood, +your bones, your flesh, your body, filled with sadness — every cell of the body sad; dark +night around you; very heavy, depressed; not a single ray of light; no hope, gloomy, just +as if you are going to die. + +Life is not throbbing in you; you are just waiting for death. It is as if death has already +settled, or is settling. For seven days contemplate on the feeling that death has entered +throughout the body; it has penetrated deep to the bone, to the very marrow. Go on +thinking in this way, don’t disturb this mood. And then, after seven days, see how you +feel. + +You will be just a dead weight. All feeling will have disappeared, the body will not be +felt as alive. And what have you done? You have been eating, you have been doing +everything the same as you have always been doing; the only change has been in the +imagination — there is a new pattern of imagination around you. + +If you succeed in it.... You will succeed. Really, you have already succeeded in it; you +are doing it, you are expert in doing this, unknowingly. That's why I say start with +sadness. If I say be filled with bliss, it will be very difficult. You cannot conceive of it. +But if you can do it with sadness, then you will become aware that if sadness can happen +to you, why not happiness? If you can create a sad milieu around you and become a dead +thing in it, then why can't you create an alive milieu around you and be alive, dancing? +The other becomes conceivable. + +Secondly, you will become aware that whatever sadness you have been suffering was not +real. You were the creator of it, you were the author; unknowingly you have been doing +this. + +It seems difficult to believe that your sadness is your imagination, because then the whole +responsibility falls on you. Then no one else is responsible, then you cannot throw it on +God, on fate, on others, on society, on wife, on husband — you cannot throw it anywhere. +You are the creator, and whatsoever is happening to you, you are creating it. + +Try it for seven days, consciously. And then, I say, you will never be sad again — because +you will have known the key. + +Then for seven days try just being in a stream of bliss — floating in it, every breath giving +you ecstasy: just feel it. Start with sadness for seven days and then for seven days move +to the contrary. And when you move to the direct opposite, you will feel it better because + + + +the contrast will be there. + +Then only can you try this experiment — because it is deeper than happiness. Sadness is +the surface, happiness is the middle, and this is the last core, the innermost core, the +cosmic essence. FEEL YOUR SUBSTANCE, BONES, FLESH, BLOOD, SATURATED +WITH THE COSMIC ESSENCE, with eternal life, with Divine energy, with cosmic +essence. But don’t start it directly because then you will not be able to touch it. Start from +sadness, then move to happiness, and then try the origin, the very origin of life — the +cosmic essence. And feel yourself filled with it. + +In the beginning you will become aware again and again that you are simply imagining it, +but don't stop. + +Even imagination is good. Even that you can imagine something worthwhile is good. + +You are imagining, and in the very imagination you are changing. It is you who are +imagining. Go on imagining, and by and by you will forget completely that you are +imagining it — it will have become a reality. + +One of the greatest books ever written is the Buddhist scripture, 'Lankawatar Sutra’. +Buddha says again and again to his disciple Mahamati, he goes on saying again and +again, "Mahamati, this is only mind. Hell is mind. Heaven is mind. The world is mind. +Enlightenment is mind." Mahamati asks again and again, "Just mind? Just mind? Even +nirvana, enlightenment, just mind?" And Buddha says, "Just mind, Mahamati." + +When you understand that everything is just mind, you are freed. Then there Then there +is no bondage, then there is no desire. In 'Lankawatar Sutra’, Buddha says that the whole +world is just like a magical world, a city of Gandharwa, as if a magician has created a +world. Everything appears to be there, but it is there only because of the thought form. +But don’t start with outer reality, that is too far. That too is mind, but it is very away from +you. Start from the very near, you own moods; and you will be the master if you can feel +and know that they are your own creation. + +Whenever you start thinking in terms of sadness, you become sad, and you become +receptive to all the sadness around you. + +Then everybody helps you to be sad. Everybody helps, the whole world is always ready +to help you, whatsoever you do. When you want to be sad, the whole world is helpful, +cooperative. You have become receptive. Really, you fall to a certain wave-length where +only sadness can be received. So even if someone comes to cheer you up, he will make +you more sad. He will not look friendly, he will not look understanding; you will feel that +he is insulting you because you are so sad and he is trying to cheer you up. He thinks +your sadness is superficial. He is not taking you seriously. + +And when you are ready to be happy, you are on a different wave-length. Now you are +attuned to all the happiness that this world can give, now everywhere flowers start +flowering, now every sound and noise becomes musical — and nothing has happened. + +The whole world remains the same, but you are different. You have a different pattern of +looking, a different attitude, a different perspective; through that perspective a different +world comes to you. + +But start with sadness because you are expert in that. I was reading a sentence of some +old Hassid mystic — I liked it very much. He says there are certain people, who, if their +whole life becomes a bed of roses, will not be happy until they develop some allergy +towards the roses. Roses cannot make them happy... only when they become allergic will +they start feeling alive. + + + +They can be attuned only to sadness, to illness, to disease, they cannot be aware of +anything else. They go on finding sadness. They are searchers after wrong — something +wrong, something sad, depressed, dark. They are death-oriented. + +I have been meeting hundreds and hundreds of persons deeply, intimately, closely. When +they start talking about their sadness I have to be serious — otherwise they will not feel +that I am sympathetic, they will not feel good about it. Then they will never turn to me +again. I have to be sad with their sadness and serious with their seriousness to help bring +them out of it., and this is their own creation, and they are making every effort to create +it. And if I try to bring them out, they create every type of barrier — not knowingly of +course, because no one will do it knowingly. + +This is what the Upanishads call ignorance. Unknowingly you go on disturbing your own +life, you go on creating more problems and anxieties, and whatsoever happens will not +make any difference because you have a pattern — whatsoever happens. There are +persons who come to me and say, "We are lonely." So they are unhappy. And the next +moment someone comes and says he cannot find a place where he can be lonely. So he is +unhappy. Then there are persons who have too much work on their minds, so they are +unhappy, and there are persons who have no work, so they are unhappy. + +A person who is married is unhappy, a person who is not married, he is unhappy. It +seems it is impossible for man to be happy. That's what I mean when I say you are +experts — you are very efficient in finding ways and means to be unhappy. And you +always succeed. + +Start from sadness, and for seven days be completely unhappy for the first time. That will +transfonn you totally. Because once you know that consciously you can be unhappy, you +will become conscious whenever you become unhappy. Then you will know what you +are doing: it is your own doing. And if you can be unhappy by your own mind, then why +can’t you be happy? There is no difference, the pattern is the same. And then you can try +this. + +FEEL YOUR SUBSTANCE, FLESH, BLOOD, BONES, SATURATED WITH THE +COSMIC ESSENCE. Feel as if the Divine is flowing through you: you are not, but the +cosmic exists in you, God exists in you. When you feel hungry, he feels hungry — then to +give food to the body becomes worship. When you feel thirsty, he feels thirsty — the +cosmic in you. When you feel sleepy, he feels sleepy, he wants rest, relaxation. When +you are young, he is young in you. When you fall in love, he falls in love. Be saturated +with him, and be TOTALLY saturated with him. Don’t make any distinction. Good or +bad, whatsoever happens is happening to him. You just withdraw, you are no longer +there, only he is there. + +So good or bad, hell or heaven, whatsoever happens, happens to him. All the +responsibility is thrown onto him and you are no more. The 'no-moreness' that this +technique can bring you is the ultimate in religion. + +But you have to be saturated with it. And you don’t know any saturation, you don’t feel +your body as porous, you don’t feel that in your body a life energy is flowing. You think +of yourself as something solid, dead, closed. Life can happen only when you are +vulnerable, open, not closed. Life moves through you, and whatsoever happens is +happening to the life energy, not to you — you are just a fragment. And all the boundaries +that you have created around you are false, they are not real. + +You cannot exist alone. If you are alone on the earth, can you exist? You cannot exist + + + +alone. You cannot exist without the stars. Somewhere Eddington says that the whole +existence is like a spider's web — the whole existence is a spider's net. If you touch the +net anywhere, the whole vibrates; if you touch existence anywhere, the whole vibrates. It +is one. If you touch a flower you have touched the whole cosmos; if you look into your +neighbors eyes you have looked into the cosmos. Because the whole net is one. You +cannot touch any part without touching the whole, and no part can exist without the +whole. + +When you start feeling this, the ego will disappear. The ego exists only when you take a +certain part as the whole. + +When you make a part the whole, the ego exists. When you come to know the right +proportion, that the part is part, and the whole is whole, the ego disappears. Ego is just a +misunderstanding. + +And this technique, to feel oneself saturated with the cosmic, is just wonderful! + +From the very early morning, when you feel life awakening, when you feel that the sleep +has gone, the first thought must be of this saturation — now the Divine is opening, +coming back out of sleep, not you. So Hindus, who have been one of the most penetrating +races in the world, will start their first breath with the name of God. Now it has become a +formality and the essential has been lost, but this was the root of it — that at the moment +you become alert in the morning you must not remember yourself, you must remember +the Divine. The Divine must become the first remembrance — and the last, at night, when +you are falling asleep. The Divine must be remembered: he must be the first and the last. +And if he is really the first in the morning and the last at night, he will be with you the +whole day, in the middle also. + +You must drop into sleep saturated with him. You will be surprised, because the quality +of your sleep will be different. While falling into sleep tonight, please don’t you fall into +sleep, let the Divine fall into sleep. While you are preparing the bed, prepare it for the +Divine — the guest is coming. + +And while you are lying on the bed, let the Divine be there, not you — treat yourself as +the guest. And while dropping into sleep go on feeling that the Divine exists, he saturates +every breath, he pulsates in the blood, he beats in the heart. Now he is tired after a whole +day of work, now he wants to sleep. + +And in the morning you will feel that you have been sleeping in a different way. The +quality of the sleep will be cosmic, because the meeting will be deep at the source. + +When you feel yourself as Divine, you fall into the abyss because then there is no fear. +Otherwise, even in the night while you are sleeping you are afraid to fall deeply into it. +Many people are suffering from sleeplessness — not because of any other tension, but +because they are afraid to fall asleep, because sleep appears like an abyss, a bottomless +thing. I have known a few persons who are afraid. + +One old man came to me and said that he could not sleep because he was afraid. I asked, +"Why are you afraid?" He said, "I am afraid because if I really sleep, and I die, I will not +be conscious, alert. And I can die because now I am old — and I don’t like the idea of +dying in sleep. At least let me be aware and alert of what is happening." + +You go on clinging to something so that you cannot fall into sleep, but when you feel that +the Divine is there, you have accepted. Then the abyss is also Divine. + + +Then you fall very deeply into the very original sources of your being — and the quality + + + +will be different. And when you arise in the morning and you feel that sleep has gone, +remember that the Divine is arising. The whole day will be different. + +And be saturated — whatsoever you do, or you don't do, let the Divine do it — simply +allow it to be done. Eat, sleep, work, but let the Divine do it. Only then can you be +saturated, can you become one with it. And once you feel, even for a single moment — +even for a single moment, I say — that the peak has come, that you are not, that the +Divine has saturated you completely, you are enlightened. In that single moment, that +timeless moment, you will become aware of the whole mystery of life. Then there is no +fear and then there is no death. Now you have become life itself. It goes on and on; it +never ends, it never begins. Then life is ecstasy. + +And the concepts of MOKSHA, of heaven and paradise, are just childish, because they +are not really something geographical. They are symbols of this ultimate state of being: +when the individual has dissolved into the cosmos or when the individual has allowed the +cosmos to dissolve into him; when the two have become one, when mind and matter, +both the manifestations, have come back to the original source, the third. The whole +search is for that. That is the only search, and you will not be satisfied until this is +achieved. + +Nothing can be a substitute for it. You can go on moving for lives and lives, but unless +this is achieved, your search will be constantly haunting you. You cannot rest. + +This technique can be very helpful and there is no danger in it; you can practise it without +a master. Remember this: all the techniques that start with the body are dangerous +without a master — because the body is a very complex phenomenon, very complex. It is +a mechanism, and without someone who knows exactly what is going on, it is dangerous +to start — you may disturb the mechanism, and then it will be difficult to repair it. All the +techniques that start directly from mind are based on imagination, and are not dangerous +because the body is not touched at all. They can be done even without a master — +although it will be difficult because you don’t have any self-confidence. A master is not +really going to do anything, but he becomes a catalytic agent. He is not going to do +anything — really nothing can be done — but with just his presence, your confidence and +trust are touched, and it helps. With just the feeling that the master is there, you move +confidently. Because he is present, you are not afraid; because he is with you, you can +move into the unknown, the uncharted. But with body techniques he is very necessary, +because the body is a mechanism and you can do something which cannot be easily +undone. + +You can harm yourself. + +One man came to me, he was doing SIRSHASAN — standing on his head for hours +together. In the beginning it was very good and he felt very relaxed and cool the whole +day. But then problems followed, and he became very disturbed when the coolness +disappeared and he became hot all over. He became almost mad. And because he thought +that SIRSHASAN helped in the beginning, and he became very cool, and felt very +collected, silent, relaxed, he did it more because now he felt so disturbed. He thought +more SIRSHASAN would help him — and SIRSHASAN was really the cause. + +The mind mechanism, the brain, needs only a certain amount of blood to circulate +through it; if less blood is circulating, you will be in difficulty. And with everyone it is +different. It depends. That’s why you cannot sleep without pillows. If you try to sleep +without pillows, you cannot sleep, or you will sleep less because more blood flows into + + + +the head. Those pillows help you. Your head is high so less blood flows, and for sleep, +less blood is needed. If more blood flows, then the brain is alert, it cannot relax. If you do +too much of SIRSHASAN, your sleep may be completely lost. You may not be able to +sleep at all. And there are dangers. It has been recorded that seven days is the longest you +can go without sleep. Only seven days, after that you will go mad, because very subtle +tissues of the brain will break, and they cannot be replaced easily. + +While you are standing on your head in SIRSHASAN, all the blood is flowing +downwards towards the head. So I have not seen anyone doing SIRSHASAN who is in +any way intelligent. If a person is doing much SIRSHASAN, he is bound to become +stupid, because the very subtle tissues of the brain will be destroyed. With so much blood +passing through, delicate tissues cannot exist. + +So it has to be decided by a master who knows how much will be helpful to you — a few +seconds, or a few minutes. And this is just an example. All the bodily postures, asanas, +techniques, have to be done with a master. They are never to be done alone because you +don’t know your body. Your body is such a big thing, you cannot even conceive of it. The +small head, your head, has seven crores of cells in it. And those seven crores of cells are +interrelated. Scientists say that the interrelationship is as complex as the whole universe. +Old Hindu seers have said that the whole cosmos exists in the head in miniature. The +whole complexity of the universe is there in miniature. If the whole relationship of all the +cells can be understood, you have understood the whole complexity of the universe. You +are not aware of any cells, and about any relationship you are not aware. And it is good +that you are not aware, otherwise you will go mad with such a big war going on. It can go +on only unconsciously. The blood circulates, but you are not aware of it. + + +Only just three centuries ago it was discovered that blood circulates in the body. Before +that it was thought that the blood was static, not circulating. Circulation is a very recent +concept. And man has been in existence for millions of years but no one could feel that +the blood was circulating. You cannot feel it. Much speed, much work is going on there. + +It is a big factory, your body, and one of the most delicate ones. It is constantly repairing +itself, constantly renewing itself. For seventy years, if you don’t make any trouble for it, it +will run smoothly. We have not created any mechanism up to now that can take care of +itself for seventy years. So when you start any work on your body remember to be near a +master who knows about what he is telling you to do. Otherwise don’t do it. + +But with imagination there is no problem. It is a simple phenomenon. You can start it. + +The second technique: + +FEEL THE FINE QUALITIES OF CREATIVITY PERMEATING YOUR BREASTS +AND ASSUMING DELICATE CONFIGURATIONS. + +A few important points before I enter this.... + +Shiva is talking to Parvati, to Devi, his consort, so this technique is specifically for +women. There are a few points to be understood. One: the male body and the female +body are similar, but still, different in many, many ways. And the difference is always +complementary. + + +Whatsoever is positive in the male body will be negative in the female body; and + + + +whatsoever is positive in the female body will be negative in the male body. That is why +when they meet in deep orgasm, they become one organism. The positive meets the +negative, the negative meets the positive, and both become one — one circle of electricity. +Hence, so much attraction for sex, so much appeal. This appeal is not because man is a +sinner or immoral, it is not because the modern world has become too licentious, it is not +because of obscene films and literature — it is very deep rooted, very cosmic. + +The attraction is because both male and female are half circuits, and there is an inherent +tendency in existence to transcend whatsoever is incomplete and to become complete. +This is one of the ultimate laws — the tendency towards completion. Wherever you feel +something is lacking, you feel that you would like to fill it, to make it complete. Nature +abhors incompleteness, any type of incompleteness. The male is incomplete, the female is +incomplete, and they can have only one moment of completion — when their electric +circuits become one, when the two are dissolved. That's why the two most important +words in all languages are love and prayer. In love you become one with a single +individual; in prayer you become one with the whole cosmos. And love and prayer are +similar as far as their inner workings are concerned. + + +Male and female bodies are similar, but their positive and negative poles are different. +When a child is born in the mother's womb, for a few weeks, at least for six weeks I +think, he is neutral — he is neither male nor female. He has the tendency, but the body is +still just in the middle. Then after six weeks the body will become either male or female. +If it becomes female, then the polarity of sex energy will be near the breasts, the positive +pole — because the female vagina is the negative pole. If the child is male, the sex center, +the penis, will be the positive pole, and the breasts are also there — the whole mechanism +is there — but they are negative. In the female body a counterpart to the penis exists, the +clitoris, but it is non-functional — it has no function. + +Physiologists have been raising questions about why there are breasts in the male body +when there appears to be no need because a child is not going to be fed. What is the +need? They are negative poles. Hence so much attraction of the male mind towards +female breasts — they are positive electricity. So much poetry, literature, painting, +sculpture, everything, is concerned with female breasts. Really, it seems man is less +concerned with the whole of the feminine body, and more concerned with the breasts. +And this is not something new. The oldest primitive paintings in the caves are of breasts, +so emphatically of breasts that the whole body is just around them. + +Breasts are basic. + +This technique is for women because their positive electricity pole is in the breasts. +Really, as far as the vagina is concerned, it is more or less insensitive. The breasts are the +most sensitive parts, and the whole creativity of the feminine body is around the breasts. +That is why Hindus have been saying that unless a woman becomes a mother she is not +fulfilled. The same is not true for men — no one will say that unless a man becomes a +father he is not fulfilled. To be a father is accidental. It may be, it may not be. It is not +very basic, and a man can remain without being a father without losing anything. But a +woman will lose something because her whole creativity, her whole functioning, comes +only when she becomes a mother. When her breasts become the center of her being she +becomes total. And she cannot come to the breasts unless a child is there to call. So men +marry women to get wives, and women marry men to become mothers — not to get + + + +husbands. Their basic sole interest is to have a child who will call their womanhood. So +really, husbands are always afraid, because the moment a child is born they move to the +periphery of the woman's interest — the child becomes the center. So fathers always feel +jealous because the children come in-between. And now the woman is more interested in +the children than in the father of the children. + +He has become a peripheral existence — necessary for survival but non-essential. Now +the basic need has been fulfilled. + +In the West now there is a trend, a fashion, not to feed children directly from the breasts. +This is very dangerous because it means that the woman will not come to the creative +center of her being. When a man loves a woman he can lover her breasts, he will love +them, but he cannot call them mother. Only a small child can call them mother. Or if the +love is very deep — so deep that the husband becomes just like a child — then it is +possible. Then the woman forgets completely that she is just a consort and she becomes a +mother to her lover. Then there will be no need for a child; she can become a mother and +the center of being can happen near the breasts. + +This technique says: FEEL THE FINE QUALITIES OF CREATIVITY PERMEATING +YOUR BREASTS AND ASSUMING DELICATE CONFIGURATIONS. The whole +creativity of feminine existence is rooted in motherhood. That is why women are not +interested in any other type of creativity. Man is a creator; woman is not a creator. She +has not painted, she has not created great poetry, she has not written big books, she has +not created great religions — she has not done anything really. But man goes on creating, +he is mad. He goes on inventing, creating, making, constructing. Tantra says that this is +because man is not a creator by nature — he remains unfulfilled, tense. + +He wants to become a mother, he wants to become a creator, so he creates poetry, he +creates books, he creates many things, he will 'mother' many things. But a woman is at +ease. If she can really become a mother she is fulfilled, she is not interested. It is only +when a woman cannot become a mother, cannot love, cannot really come to the peak of +her creativity, that she will start thinking about doing something else. So basically, +uncreative women will become creators — poets and painters — but they will always be +second-rate, they cannot be first-rate. It is just as impossible for them to be creators of +paintings and poetry and other things, as it is impossible for man to create a child. He +cannot become a mother, that is biologically impossible. And he feels the gap. To fill the +gap he goes on doing many things — but still even a great creator is not as fulfilled, or +only very rarely, as a woman is if she really becomes a mother. + +A Buddha is fulfilled because he has created himself. He is reborn, he has given rebirth to +himself, he is a new man, he is both father and mother to himself now. He can feel +fulfilled. + +A woman can feel fulfilled more easily. Her creativity is just around the breasts. That’s +why all over the world, women are concerned so much with their breasts — it is as if their +whole existence is concentrated there. They are always alert about their breasts — hiding +or exhibiting, but always concerned. + +The breasts are their most secret part, their treasure, their center of being; of being +mother, of being a creator. + +Shiva says: FEEL THE FINE QUALITIES OF CREATIVITY PERMEATING YOUR +BREASTS AND ASSUMING DELICATE CONFIGURATIONS. Just concentrate on + + + +the breasts, become one with them, forget the whole body. Move your total +consciousness to the breasts and many phenomena will happen to you. If you can do this, +if you can concentrate totally near the breasts, the whole body will lose weight, and a +very sweet, deep sweetness will envelop you. It will pulsate around you, within you, +above, below, everywhere — a deep feeling of sweetness. + +Really, all the techniques that have been developed have been developed more or less by +man, so they always give centers which are easier for men to follow. As far as I know, +only Shiva has given some techniques which are basically for women. A man cannot do +this. Really if a man tries to concentrate near the breasts he will become very uneasy. Try +it. Even within five minutes you will start perspiring and you will become very uneasy, +because male breasts are negative, they will give you negativity. You will feel uneasy, +uncomfortable, that something is going wrong in the body, ill. + +But female breasts are positive. If women concentrate near the breasts, they will feel very +happy, very blissful, a sweetness will pervade all over their being and their body will lose +gravity. + +They will feel light, as if they can fly. And with this concentration many things will +change: you will become more motherly. You may not become a mother but you will +become more motherly. To everyone your relationship will become motherly — more +compassion, more love will happen. But this concentration near the breasts should be +done very relaxedly, not tensely. If you are tense about it there will be a division between +you and the breasts. Relax and melt into them, and feel that you are no more, that only +the breasts are there. + +If man has to do the same he will have to do it with the sex center, not with the breasts. +Hence the importance of the first chakra in all kundalini yogas. He has to concentrate just +at the root of the penis — there he has the creativity, there he is positive. And remember +this always: never concentrate on anything negative because with the negative everything +negative will follow. With the positive, everything positive will follow. + +When the two poles of man and woman meet, negative is in the upper part of man, +positive is in the lower; and negative is in the lower part of woman and positive in the +upper. These two poles of positive and negative meet and a circle is created. That circle is +blissful, but it is not ordinary. In ordinary sexual acts, the circle does not happen — that is +why you feel so attracted towards sex, and so repelled also. + +You feel so much for it, you need it so much, you ask for it so much, but when it is given, +when it is there, you feel frustration — nothing happens. It is possible only when both the +bodies are very relaxed and very open to each other without any fear, without any +resistance. Then the let-go is so complete that the electricities can merge and meet and +become a circle. + +Then there is a very strange phenomenon.... Tantra has recorded it but you may not have +heard of it. This phenomenon is a very strange one. When two lovers really meet and +become a circle then a flickering happens. For a moment the lover becomes the beloved +and the beloved becomes the lover, and the next moment, again the lover is lover and the +beloved is the beloved. The male becomes the female for a moment, then the female +becomes the male for the moment — because the energy is moving, and it has become one +circle. So it will happen that the male will be active for a few minutes and then he will +relax and the female will become active. That means that now the male energy has passed +to the female body and she will act while the male will remain passive. And this will go + + + +on. Ordinarily you are man, and woman. In deep love, in deep orgasm, it will happen that +for moments man will become woman, and the woman will become man. It will be felt, +absolutely felt and recognized, that the passivity changes. + +In life there is rhythm; in everything there is rhythm. + +When you take a breath, the breath goes in — then for a few seconds it stops, there is no +movement. Then again it moves, out it goes — and again there is a stop, a gap, no +movement. Movement, no movement, movement. When your heart beats, there is one +beat, gap, another beat, gap. The beat means male, the non-beat gap means female. + +Life is rhythm. When two persons meet, male and female, it becomes a circle: there will +be gaps for both. You will be a woman and suddenly there will be a gap and you are no +longer a woman, you have become a man. You will be man and woman and man. When +these gaps are felt you can feel that you have achieved a circle. This circle is represented +in Shiva's symbol-the shiva-linga. This circle is represented by the yoni of Devi and linga +of Shiva. It is a circle. It is one of the peak phenomena of two high energies meeting. + +This technique will be good. FEEL THE FINE QUALITIES OF CREATIVITY +PERMEATING YOUR BREASTS AND ASSUMING DELICATE +CONFIGURATIONS. Simply relax, move into the breasts, let your breasts become your +whole being. Let the whole body be just a situation for the breasts to exist, your body has +become secondary, just a background, and the breasts are emphasized. And you are +totally relaxing in them, moving in them. Then your creativity will arise. The feminine +creativity arises only when the breasts become active. Merge into them and you will feel +creativity arising. + + +What does it mean when creativity arises? You will have many visions around you. +Buddha and Mahavir have said in their past lives that when they are born their mothers +will see certain visions, certain dreams. Because of those dreams, it could be predicted +that a Buddha was going to be born. Sixteen visions would follow each other. + +I have been experimenting with this. If a woman really melts into her breasts, certain +visions will follow in a certain sequence. She will start seeing certain things. To different +women there will be different sequences, but I will tell you a few. One, there will be +figures, human figures, and if the woman is going to give birth to a child, then the figure +of the child will appear. If total melting has happened in the breasts then the woman can +see what type of child is going to be born to her. The figure will appear, and then it will +be more clear. If she is not going to be a mother soon or she is not pregnant, then very +unknown scents, perfumes will happen around her. The breasts can become sources of +very delicate perfumes which are not of this world, which cannot be created chemically; +sounds, harmonious sounds will be heard; all the realms of creativity can appear in new +and many configurations. All that has happened to great painters and poets will happen to +the woman if she can melt into her breasts. + +And this will be so real that it will change her total personality — she will become +different. + +And if she goes on with these visions, by and by they will drop, and a moment will come +when nothingness, void, emptiness will happen — SHUNYATA will happen. This +SHUNYATA is the highest of meditations. + +So remember this: if you are a woman, don’t concentrate on the third eye. It will be better + + + +for you to concentrate near the breasts — on the breasts, right on the two nipples of the +breasts. Concentrate there. And the second thing: don't concentrate on one breast — +concentrate on both simultaneously. If you concentrate on one, your body will +immediately be disturbed. Even paralysis is possible if you concentrate on only one. So +just concentrate on both simultaneously, melt into them and allow whatsoever happens to +happen. Just go on watching and don’t get attached to any rhythm because the rhythms +will be very beautiful, just heavenly. Don’t get attached. Go on watching them and be a +witness. A moment will come when they will start disappearing — and when +SHUNYATA, nothingness, happens, when just space, just space remains and the breasts +have disappeared, then you are under the Bodhi tree. + + +THE END. + + + +Chapter 68: If you get serious you lose the point + + +The first question: + +Question 1 + +IT HAS BEEN SAID THAT NO DESIRE, NEITHER WORLDLY NOR RELIGIOUS, +CAN LEAD TOWARDS FREEDOM. BUT A POSITIVE IMAGINATION OF +HAPPINESS AND BLISS IS ALSO A SORT OF DESIRE. THEN ISN’T IT TRUE +THAT IMAGINATION IS ALSO DESIRE AND HENCE CREATES TENSIONS? + +Imagination is not desire. Imagination is just a play. + +Desire is a totally different thing. You can base your imagination on desire, you can +project your imagination through desire — then it will be a bondage. If you simply play +with imagination without any desire — not to reach anywhere, not to get anything out of +it, but just as a game, then it is not desire and not binding. These techniques of +imagination can be helpful only if you are playing with them. If you get serious, you lose +the point. + +But the question is relevant because, really, you cannot conceive of anything which you +can do without desire. Even if you are playing, you can play only to reach somewhere, to +get something, to win. If there is nothing in the future, you will lose interest. You will +say, "Then why? Then why play at all?" + +We are so end-oriented that we turn everything into a means. This must be remembered: +meditation is the ultimate play, it is not a means to something, it is not a means to +enlightenment. Enlightenment happens in it, but it is not a means to it. + +It is not a means to ultimate freedom. Ultimate freedom happens in it, but it is not a +means to it. You cannot use it as a cause to effect something. This has been one of the +most puzzling things — all through the centuries, those who have known go on insisting +on meditation for meditation's sake. Don't desire anything out of it, enjoy it in itself, don't +move out of it — and the consequence will be enlightenment. Remember, consequence — +not effect. Meditation is not a cause, but if you are deep in meditation, enlightenment +happens. Really, being deep in the play is enlightenment. + +But the mind always turns everything into work. It says, "Do something because this will +be the profit from it." Imaginary or real, the mind needs something to hang onto, to +project onto. Only then can it devote itself. That is how mind functions — it functions in +the present for the future. The future may be illusory, it may not ever happen, but if the +mind can hope for the future then it can work. This is what is called desire: working in +the present for the future. The end is always somewhere else; the means are here but the +end is somewhere else. This division of end and means, this gap, is desire. If you are +playing, there is no desire because the end is here and the means are also here. While +playing there is no future; you are simply merged so much in it that the future disappears. + + +Look at children playing. Look at their faces, at their eyes. Now they are in eternity. They +are happy because they are playing. Happiness will not result in an end, it is here right +now. Moment to moment they are happy — not that something great is going to happen +later on — it is happening already. They are in eternity. But their minds are still not +developed. We will force them to develop because this play will not be of much help in + + + +the world. They will have to learn work. They will have to divide means and end. They +will have to create a gap between this moment and the future, and we will teach them to +sacrifice the present for the future. This is the way of the world, the way of the market, +the way of desire. Desire makes everything utilitarian. + +In meditation you will become a child again, playing, with no idea of the future, enjoying +this very moment, enjoying the very act in itself, intrinsically. Then imagination is not +desire. Then you can play with it, and it is one of the most beautiful things possible. And +this playing, this being in the moment, totally absorbed, is enlightenment. The moment it +happens you are transformed. + +So enlightenment is never in the future, it is always in the present; and it is not a work to +be done, it is a game to be played. + +That is the meaning of the Indian concept of LEELA. God is playing; he is not engaged +in work. + +This world is not utilitarian, it is just a play of energy. Energy enjoys itself playing; it +divides itself and then plays the game of hide and seek. So, really, Indian seers have +never said that God is the creator, they say that God is the player — because the very +word 'creation’ carries much seriousness about it, as if there is some end and something +has to be achieved. God creating the world? This is absurd. Because it means that +something is lacking, so God is creating the world to achieve something. Or it means that +there is a future, so God also lives in desire. + +Jains and Buddhists could not understand the Hindu concept of LEELA, so they +completely denied God. Because if God creates the world, then he desires — so Jains and +Buddhists say that if God desires, then God is part of the world. He himself is not free, he +himself is not liberated. So they completely denied the concept of God because they say +that God means one who is beyond desire. And they say that Mahavir is a God, he is +beyond desire, but Brahma is not a God because he creates the world, he desires the +world. They couldn’t follow the concept of LEELA. + +The concept of LEELA is totally different from the concept of creation. God is just +playing and you cannot ask "Why?" because a play has no "Why?" to answer. If children +are playing can you ask, "Why are you playing?" They will say, "We are playing, so we +are playing." + +Playing is good in itself — the energy is moving, abundant energy is overflowing. + +The more you grow the less you play. Why? Because now your energy is not so +overflowing. Now you have become economical. Now you know that you have a certain +amount of energy and you have to channel that energy for work, to achieve something. +Children are just overflowing. Their energy is so much that they have to play. The play is +just overflowing energy, too much energy moving. Then they enjoy the very moment. A +child is jumping, running, but not to reach some goal. Running itself is a beautiful +experience of vital energy, an experience of vitality, an experience of being alive, of +overflowing so abundantly that you can throw out the energy without any economical +mind behind it. + +God means absolute energy, infinite energy. God cannot be economical. He has so much, +so infinitely much, that he can only play. And this play goes on and on, there is no end to +it. There cannot be because the energy is infinite. And you cannot ask "Why?" Energy +moves, there is no "Why?" to it. If God created the world you can ask, "Why? Why have +you created the world?" But if he is simply playing you cannot ask "Why?" + + + +When you also become a player, you become Divine. If you are a worker you are human; +if you are a player you have become Divine. Then you share in the game. That's why we +have called Krishna the absolute AVATAR. + +We have not called Ram the absolute AVATAR, we call him a partial AVATAR — a +partial coming of the Divine to the world. But Krishna we call an absolute coming. The +difference is that Ram is serious. He is still utilitarian, end-oriented: this is right and that +is wrong. Only in work do right and wrong exist: this should be done and that should not +be done, this is good and that is bad. For Krishna everything has become a play so +everything is arbitrary — just rules of the game. + +If you follow the rules, and if you follow them knowing that this is a game and that the +rules have to be followed, it is good. If you don’t follow, nothing is wrong; really, you are +playing the reverse game of not following. If you obey, you follow the game of +obedience; if you don't obey, you follow the game of disobedience, the game of +rebelliousness. But nothing is wrong. What you want to play is your choice. And if you +are not serious and are happy whatsoever you do, you are enlightened. + +There are rules because a game has to be played with others. If you are playing alone +there is no question of rules; then you can change your rules any moment you like. But +because you are playing with others, rules have to be followed so that you can play with +them. There isn't any other reason behind it. Morality is a rule, love is a rule, society is +just a rule — agreed-upon rules that we are going to play a game so we will agree. + +If you don't want to play the game then you can be rebellious, but don't be serious about +it. Then play the game of being rebellious. And if someone kills you, murders you, or +crucifies you, you know that you were playing the game of a rebellious leader, so you +have been killed. There is no condemnation. You were not with the established rules, so +the established rules were against you — it is okay. Then nothing is wrong, and you don’t +have to complain. + +Once you become aware that the concept of work, utility, reaching somewhere, the goal, +is the bondage, it doesn’t mean that you stop playing the dame in the market — you go on +playing. But you know that this is a game. It doesn’t mean that you divorce your wife — +you go on playing the game of marriage. But know well that this is a game. Don't get +serious about it. And if you want to play the game of divorce, you can play it, but +remember, don’t get serious about it. Divorce or marriage — these are alternative games; +being a worldly man or becoming a sannyasin — these are alternative games. But don’t be +serious about it. Be light-hearted, festive. And whatsoever you choose, you can play; and +whatsoever consequences follow, you will welcome them because there is nothing +serious about them. + +Once this deepens in your consciousness — and it will deepen if you start playing with +meditation — it will be a good beginning. + +Because in meditation you alone are the player. That's why it can be a good beginning, +the right beginning. You are alone playing the game so you can forget society and society +will not come to interfere. This is a solo game, meditation, a solo game. You play alone. +So whatsoever you want to play you can play, but forget the ends. If there are ends you +have also turned meditation into a work. Just play it, enjoy it, love it. It is beautiful in +itself. There is no need for any other end to beautify it. + +People come to me and they say, "We are enjoying meditation, but tell us what is going + + + +to happen. What will be the end result?" I tell them, "This IS the end result — that you are +enjoying. Enjoy it more!" But they go on insisting, "Tell us something about it. What will +be the end result? Where will we reach to?" They are not concerned at all where they are: +they are always concerned with where they will reach to. The mind cannot exist in the +present so it goes on giving you excuses to move into the future. These excuses are the +desires. So if you desire to be a god, to be a buddha, your meditation will be a sort of +desire, and then it is not meditation. If you don't desire anything, you just enjoy being +here, you just celebrate being alive, you enjoy the inner energy playing in imagination, in +visions, in emptiness, whatsoever you choose, and you are totally one with this moment +of enjoyment, then it is meditation. + +Then there is no desire, and, with no desire, the world drops. With a non-desiring, playful +mind you have entered. You are already in it. + +But this has to be hammered into your mind again and again because your mind is a +transfonner. It transforms anything into a desire — anything — it can transfonn even non- +desire into a desire. People come to me and they say, "How does one achieve the state of +non-desire?" How to achieve the state of non-desire? Now this has become the desire. +Your mind has a transforming mechanism: whatsoever you put in will come out as a +desire. + +Be alert of this and enjoy moments so much that no energy is left to move into the future. +Then, any day, any moment, it will happen to you that suddenly all the darkness falls; +suddenly all that is a burden disappears; suddenly you are freed. But the emphasis should +be more and more on play, the present, here and now — and less and less on the future. +The second question: + +Question 2 + +YESTERDAY, YOU SAID THAT MIND IS REALITY, DREAM IS REALITY. THEN +WHY DO GURUS LIKE YOU TAKE THE TROUBLE TO TEACH US THAT MIND +IS THE ONLY BARRIER, MIND IS THE ONLY OBSTACLE? + +Gurus and disciples are mind phenomena. Because your mind needs gurus, there are +gurus. You create them. Because you want to be taught, there are teachers. You need +them. + +This is a game. + +When I say marriage is a game, don’t think that I would not say that 'guru and disciples' +is not a game. It is a game. Some people enjoy it, so they play it. If you enjoy it, play it +deeply; if you don’t enjoy it, forget it. But this is one of the most beautiful of games. It +goes even deeper than marriage. + +It is one of the most beautiful, most refined of games — and only when a culture reaches +the peak does this dame develop, never before. So, really, only in India has the game +developed. The game of the guru and the disciple came into being here. Now the West is +discovering it for the first time because now the West is reaching to a peak. This game is +the most luxurious. It is not ordinary, so only people who can afford it can play it. And if +you know that this is a beautiful game and you enjoy it, you can play it. But don’t get +serious about it. And disciples can be forgiven if they are serious, but when teachers are +serious it is absurd. It cannot be forgiven if they are not even aware that this is a game. + +In reality all games disappear, but for the mind, games exist. By this I am not saying that + + + +you should stop playing, I am only saying that you should become aware that this is a +play and then if you enjoy it go on playing it. If you don’t enjoy it, then stop. Once you +become aware that everything in life, every relationship, is a sort of game, you are +already free, because you are in bondage only because of the seriousness. + +You are in bondage because you think everything is so serious. Nothing is so serious. But +it is difficult to conceive of this whole life as a game. + +Why is it so difficult? Because then the ego falls flat. If everything is a game, the ego +cannot stand. The ego needs food. Seriousness is the food. It feeds on it. So when you +become a disciple, if you are just playing, your ego cannot get strong through it because +you know that this is a play. + +What is there to be so egoistic about? People start thinking that they are disciples of a +very great guru. The guru may not be great or he may be great, that is not the point — but +the disciple thinks, "I am the disciple of the greatest guru." That becomes a vitamin and +the ego grows on it, becomes stronger. + +That's why disciples go on fighting about gurus. No one can believe that his guru is +number two, he is always number one. And it is not about whether he is number one or +not — that is not the point — it is because you can be number one only if your guru is +number one. The ego of the disciple depends on the height of the guru. If someone says +something against your guru, why do you feel so hurt? Your ego is hurt. YOUR guru +means YOUR ego, embodied, and if someone says something against your guru, you +cannot tolerate it. It is impossible because it is a direct hit at your ego. + +But for disciples it can be tolerated. + +They are ignorant and whatsoever they do, they will do wrongly. That is agreed upon. + +But so-called gurus are also playing the game very seriously. They cannot laugh; it is +impossible for them to laugh about the whole game. A guru is really a guru when he +knows that the whole thing is a game and that in the game he is helping to make you +more aware. And a moment will come when you will also laugh, a moment will come +when you will be able to look back — and then you will feel very grateful because for you +it was so serious and for the guru it was never anything. But he was playing the game so +seriously with you and making every effort — as if he was leading you somewhere. +Remember, it is 'as if because there is nowhere to lead you to. You have to be here. So +all the efforts which appear to be leading you somewhere are just devices. You cannot be +led anywhere. You are already at home, you have never left it. You are rooted in the +reality, in the truth. So all these games of leading, guidance, guru-dom, are to bring you +to situations where you will find everything that you wanted to find already there. + +But you cannot understand non-seriousness. The ego doesn’t know that language. Every +religion is born as a play, and every religion becomes a church, very serious, deadly +serious. Every religion is born as a dance, as a song, as a festivity, and then everything +goes dead and serious. + +Religion cannot be serious really. It must be ecstatic. It must be the highest peak of bliss. +How can it be serious? + +Christians go on thinking and believing that Jesus never laughed. Look at Krishna — you +cannot find any common ground between them. Not that Jesus was like that, but +Christians have made him serious because only around a serious Jesus is a serious church +possible. And then the whole game of popes — so serious, so burdened. Jesus must have + + + +been a very light-hearted man, laughing, enjoying, eating, drinking, dancing. He must +have loved life very deeply. + +That was the sin. That was the reason why he was crucified. Those who crucified him +were very serious. They were the old established church. Really, they did not crucify +Jesus — they crucified the festivity of him. And there would have been no Christianity if +he had not been crucified, because he was a very joyous man. The moment Jews crucified +him the whole thing became very serious. Death became the point. And the figure on the +cross is of course very serious — dead. And Christianity arose around the dead body and +the cross. The cross became the symbol — not Jesus laughing in a village, drinking at a +party, eating with friends, or staying in a prostitute's home. No, they were not to become +the symbols. The cross became the symbol, and with the cross, seriousness — dead +seriousness. And because of that cross and the crucified Jesus, Christianity went against +life. + +Ah that is alive became sin. + +And every religion goes on doing this in its own way. + +Those who are very sophisticated will not do it in this way, they will do it in another way. +We have not transformed Krishna — India is a very sophisticated land, it will not do such +a thing — but we have never taken him to our heart. He is just a myth, beautiful. + +The Gita became more important than Bhagvad. Krishna’s life is not so important for +Hindus, but his message delivered on the war field is very important. Why? Because it is +a serious thing. A war field is nearer to death than to life. Krishna's life is very much +alive, but that has become a myth and nobody bothers about it. His few words uttered on +the war field have become more important than his whole life. And then there are pundits +who go on explaining that his life is just symbolic, it is not real. His playing with the +GOPIS is not real — GOPIS are just symbols of senses, not real. They are not real women +of bone and flesh, no. GOPIS are not women, they are symbolic. And pundits are very +efficient in doing such tricks. They say that Krishna is the soul and the GOPIS are the +senses of the body — the senses are dancing around the soul. This is a sophisticated +country. They kill Krishna, they crucify Krishna, but in a very sophisticated way. His +festivity is killed; it becomes symbolic, meaningless. And his whole real life is pushed +aside. + + +He was dancing with real women, but that is shocking because we cannot conceive of +Krishna dancing with real women. We can allow him to dance with symbolic women but +not with real women. We will be shocked. Life shocks us. We have become so dead that +anything alive shocks us. + +Every religion is born in festivity — and when the festivity dies know well that the +religion is dead. Whenever a new religion is born, all the old religions will be against it +because again the festivity will be there. Just as when a child is bom — every child is +bom as a player, festive, alive, celebrating, irresponsibly celebrating, not believing in the +future, believing in the here and now — the whole society will be against him; the whole +society will try to put him right before he goes astray. He must be put on the right track. +The same happens with every new religion. So when I talk of meditation as a dance, or +when I talk about SANNYAS as an inner celebration and happiness, an affirmation of +life, of course all those who belong to old traditions will say, " Y ou call this +SANNYAS?" And in a way they are right because whatsoever they have been believing + + + +that SANNYAS is, is not this. They have been believing in dead men — the more dead, +the more they say, "Now this is real renunciation." When life has been renounced, they +call it SANNYAS — but I call it SANNYAS when life is being lived in its totality. + + +But this is how it will be always. When I am no more, you will turn it into a serious thing. +You will give explanations of what the real meaning is. But the real meaning is always +obvious, there is no need to give any explanation. All explanations are to explain away — +to bring in something which was not there. + +Gurus, disciples, awakened ones and ignorant ones... this is a great play, a cosmic play. +Ignorant ones need awakened ones; awakened ones cannot play solo, alone — they need +ignorant ones. But the master knows that this is a play and is not serious about it. + +The third question: + +Question 3 + +YOU SAID LAST NIGHT THAT A CHANGE IN THE OUTER OR INNER AND +PHYSICAL OR MENTAL ASPECTS CAN BRING A CHANGE IN +CONSCIOUSNESS. THAT MEANS THAT CHANGES ON THE PERIPHERY ALSO +AFFECT THE CONSCIOUSNESS, THE CENTER. BUT THEN WHY DO YOU +EMPHASIZE CHANGING THE CENTER, INSTEAD OF CHANGING THE OUTER, +THE PERIPHERY? + +This is the trouble: you go on catching the words and missing the meaning. + +The periphery also belongs to you; it is part of the center. The periphery is part of the +center, it is the outer part of the center, but it is not different from the center. Can you +create a periphery without the center? Or can you create a center without the periphery? +They are not separate, they are one. The periphery is the center looked at from without. + +If you change your periphery, the center will also be affected for two reasons: firstly, the +periphery is part of the center, and secondly, what will change the periphery but the +center? What will change the periphery? The center will change the periphery. + +But my emphasis on starting the work from the center is still there because if you start +changing the periphery it will take a longer time to reach to the center. That which can be +done in a single moment may take many lives, because you have to travel from the +periphery to the center — backwards from the superficial to the depth. If you start work +from the center, the periphery automatically changes. When the center is different, the +periphery will follow it because the periphery cannot go away from you. For example, I +will not tell you to try to be non-violent at the periphery — it is an unnecessary wastage of +time and effort. Be non-violent at the heart, be compassionate, loving, at the heart — and +the periphery will follow. You can forget it completely because whatsoever happens at +the periphery comes from the center, so if at the center you are compassionate, the +periphery will follow. And this compassion will be totally different because the periphery +will not know that this is compassion; the periphery will not feel elated that this is +compassion; the periphery will be blissfully unaware — the compassion will follow you +like a shadow. + +This is the easiest course. + +What I mean is this: if you want to change a tree, change the roots. Of course, the leaves +of the tree are also the tree, and you can also try to change the leaves. If you change the + + + +leaves the roots will be affected but it is going to be a very long process because the flow +is from the roots to the leaves, the flow is not from the leaves to the roots. You are +following a reverse direction from that of nature. If you go on changing the leaves, after +many, many lives you may affect the pattern of the roots, but this is going to be +unnecessarily long. You can do it immediately if you change the pattern at the roots. The +leaves will change and will become different. + +So when I emphasize the center, I don’t mean that the periphery is separate from the +center. And when I emphasize the center, I don’t mean that you cannot affect the center +from the periphery — you can, but this is the longest route possible. If you choose to +travel the long route it is up to you. Nothing is wrong in it. If you enjoy the journey, then +the long route is good. If you just want to see the side views then the long route is good. +Otherwise start from the center. + +It is like this: we are sitting here and you are listening to me, so a center is created in this +room — you become the periphery, I become the center. A group soul exists. You are +centered towards me. + +If someone wants to affect this room and this group soul, it is better to start from me than +from you. Because if I change my mind, effects will come soon, but if someone starts +from you, it is going to be a very long effort. Because for one thing, you are many and +first he has to change you one by one, and then he must try to change me through you. +This is going to be very long, and it may not succeed ever. The other is easier. If he +changes me and if you are attached to me as the center, immediately there will be effects. +In your body, in your being, the same phenomenon is happening. There is the center and +there is the periphery of your life. With a direct hit at the center the periphery will follow +— it has to follow, there is no other way to go. Changing the periphery is a piecemeal +affair: you change one fragment and ninety-nine other fragments remain as the old; then +when you move to another fragment, those ninety-nine others will change the one you +tried to change — they will make it again the old. The whole pattern will be against it. I +can change one habit — much effort will be needed — but not your whole pattern because +your center goes on giving you all the old habits. I have changed only one habit and there +are thousands of habits. This changed habit is just from the surface, forced. The moment +you become unaware, all the other habits and the pattern will change it again into the old. + +So much effort is wasted working on the periphery. + +I have seen people who have been working their whole life for ordinary things. For +example, someone has been trying for his whole life to stop smoking — this has been the +whole aim, the only aim, and he has not achieved it. I tell such a person that even if you +achieve it, what is achieved? The while life is lost just in trying to stop smoking. It is not +worth it. When you reach to the Divine source, to God, you will only be able to say that +you have stopped smoking. This won't be worth telling. And the whole life has been +spent trying to stop smoking and even that has not been achieved. This is piecemeal +work. And the problem is not smoking: you are fighting against a current by changing a +small wave — and the whole river goes on flowing. If you change a wave, the whole river +will change the wave back again into itself, because the pattern, the built-in pattern, goes +on being flashed from the center to the periphery. It is a built-in program: whatsoever is +happening on the periphery has happened already in the center. That's why it is +happening there. The periphery comes to know about things which have been happening +very deeply. + + + +Move to the cause and don't be too much concerned with the effect. + +This is scientific. Change the center. Don’t try to stop smoking, don't try to stop this and +that — follow the deepest pattern. + +Why is smoking there? Why is this obsession with sex there? Why is this obsession with +money there? Why are you a miser? Why do you go on clinging to dead money? Y ou can +donate it — it will not make any difference. Donating will not help, you will again gather. +And donating in itself will be an investment for the future, it will be part of your ha nk +balance. You cannot donate just in play, can you? You can donate very seriously when it +is said that the donation will lead you to heaven. Then you can donate. To me a donator +who is giving his money for some future end in paradise is more clinging to his money +than a person who can throw away all his fortune in a game of cards. This person is less +greedy. He can play with it, and his achievement is deeper. He may look immoral +because morality is created by the donators. They will say, "You are wasting money." +They never waste money; they always invest it. And this man is mad, immoral, wasting +money. But this man is less greedy, and this man can move deeper more easily than the +greedy man who is donating for some paradise or something. + +You can change outer things, but even the change will deep down have the same pattern. +The pattern has to be uprooted and transformed. That’s why I emphasize starting from the +center. But don’t think that I mean that if you cannot start from the center, don't start from +the periphery. That is not what I mean. + +If you can't start from the center, please start from the periphery. Something is better than +nothing. It will take much time, or you may not ever be able to do it, but still the very +effort will be good. + +I am reminded of an incident. In a waiting room of an airport, a young woman was crying +steadily. Everyone around was aware of it, but no one know what to do. Then one fellow +took courage. He came near the woman, tried to console her, said some soothing things, +put his arm around her, and asked, "What can I do? Is there anything I can do to help you +to stop crying?" But she was not listening. She continued crying, so he squeezed her a +little more tightly and then again asked, "Is there anything I can do to stop you from +crying?" The woman said at last, "I am afraid not. This is hay fever, but, still, please, keep +on trying." + +That's what I say to you. From the periphery it is difficult because it is like hayfever. It is +almost impossible, but please, keep on trying. Something may happen. Who knows? + +But if you are really interested, start from the center. + +The fourth question: + +Question 4 + +WHY SHOULD THERE BE A DIFFERENCE IN TECHNIQUES FOR MEN AND +WOMEN? + +Because they are different. They are as different as possible. They are polar opposites. +Really, the more relevant question would be this: Why should there be similar +techniques? + +There are techniques which are being used by both men and women, not because they are +suited to women, but really because special techniques were never developed for them. + + +They have been a neglected part of humanity. All the techniques were developed by men. + + + +Basically man was experimenting with himself: he knew about his energy pattern, his +routes of energy, his passages of energy. He worked on these. And then he was talking to +other men — so techniques were developed by men for men. Women were never +considered. + +Women cannot enter a Mohammedan mosque. They are not to be a part of Islam really: +the mosque exists only for men. For many years Buddha insistently denied women +initiation. Mahavir initiated many women, he never denied them initiation, but no +techniques were developed for them. All the techniques were for men. Women worked +through them. That's why the results were never so miraculous, never; they were always +so-so, bound to be. Really, there is no need for three hundred religions in the world, there +is only need for two religions: one for men and one for women. And those two religions +need not be in conflict, they can be married together. They will become one. There is no +need of any conflict. If a man and a woman can fall in love and live together as a single +unit, those two religions can fall in love — they should. + +The whole physiology, the whole psychology, every layer of the feminine consciousness +is different from man’s — not only different, just the opposite. For example, kundalini +yoga... it is not for women at all. + +But many will be shocked if I say that. And women particularly will be shocked. They +will think that something has been taken out of their hands. It is not for them at all +because kundalini is based on the positive sex center for man. The positive sex center is +at the root of the penis — for men not for women. For women that center is negative, and +energy cannot be raised from a negative center. So almost always it is the case — this is +my observation — that whenever women say they are feeling kundalini arising in the, +they are imagining. It cannot happen but they are very imaginary, more imaginary than +men. So if I work with ten women and ten men, nine women will feel the energy arising +and only one man will feel the energy arising. This is miraculous because it cannot +happen! They go on coming to me and I say, "Okay, it is happening." What to do? It is +impossible, scientifically impossible, because energy can come only from a positive pole. +Totally different techniques should be developed, totally different techniques — but +because man and woman live so near, so close together, they go on forgetting that they +are different. Nothing is similar, and it is good that nothing is similar, because that's why +they can become one circle of energy. They are complementary, they fit into each other. +But because they fit that doesn’t mean that they are similar — they fit because they are not +similar. + + +And whenever two similar types of bodies and minds try to fit into each other, this is +perversion. So I say that homosexuality is a perversion. In the West, now, it has become +more and more prevalent. Now homosexuals think they are progressive: they have their +clubs, parties, institutions, magazines, propaganda, everything. And their number is +rising. In certain countries it has come to near about forty per cent. Sooner or later +homosexuality will become a pattern all over, a normal pattern. Now even certain states +in America are allowing homosexual marriage. If people insist, you have to allow it +because the government has to serve the people. If two men want to live together in +marriage, it is no one's business to create obstacles. It's okay. If two women want to live +together, married, it's no one's business. It's their own affair. But this is basically +unscientific. It is their affair, but unscientific. It is their affair and no one needs to + + + +interfere, but their minds are unenlightened about the very basic pattern of human energy +and its movement. Homosexuals cannot develop spirituality. It is very difficult. Their +whole pattern of energy movement is disturbed. The whole mechanism is shocked, +perverted. And now if homosexuality grows too much in the world, very different +techniques will have to be developed, unknown before, to help them to move towards +meditation. + +When I say a man and woman are two counterparts of one whole, I mean they are +complementary. + +And the complementariness is possible only when their opposite poles meet. Look at it in +this way: the vagina is the negative pole in the feminine body and the breasts are the +positive pole. This is the rod of magnetism: the positive pole near the breasts, the +negative pole near the vagina. For man the negative pole is at the breasts, and the positive +pole is at the penis. So when breasts meet — male and female — negative and positive are +meeting; and when sex centers meet in coitus, negative and positive are meeting. Now +both magnetic rods are meeting at their opposite poles, now there is a circle — the energy +can flow, the energy can move. But this circle will happen only when a man and woman +are in love. If they are not in love, then only their sex centers will meet — one positive +pole will meet with one negative pole. There will be an exchange of energy, but linear. A +circle cannot be made. That's why without love you never feel satisfied. + +Sex without love becomes just a trifle. It is not deep moving. Energy moves, but in a line +— a circle is not made. And when a circle is there you become one, not before. When you +are deep in love, then breasts also meet, never before. So the sex act is very easy, the love +act is more complex. The sex act is just physical — two energies meeting and dissipating. +Hence, if there is only sex, sooner or later you will feel frustrated: you waste energy and +nothing is gained. + +The gain happens only when there is a circle. If the circle is totally there, then both the +partners will come out of the sex act more energetic, more alive, more charged, with +more energy flowing. If there is only the sex act, both partners will come out of it +discharged, faint. They have lost energy. Sleep will follow because all they are feeling is +weak. + +In this 'one pole meeting’, men are at more of a loss than women. That’s why women can +become prostitutes — because the positive pole is man and the negative pole is woman. +Energy flows from man to woman but not vice versa. So a woman can be in twenty or +thirty sex acts in one night, a man cannot. A man cannot be in two. It depends on age, +how his energy is moving — because nothing is gained. So to me, if prostitution is bad it +is not because of prostitution, it is because a circle is impossible. You are not charged. +You simply waste your energy. If there is love, then man and woman meet on two poles. +Man gives to the woman and the woman returns it back. This is reciprocal, mutual. + +For females, meditation will be good if it starts from the breasts. That is their positive +pole. Because of this, many strange things become possible, happen. Man always likes to +enter the woman immediately. He is not interested in foreplay because his positive pole is +always ready. And women are always reluctant to enter into the sex act immediately, +without any foreplay, because their negative pole is not ready. + +And it cannot be ready. Unless the man starts loving the woman from the breasts, the +negative pole will not be ready. They can yield but they will not participate. And man + + + +thinks the sex act is simple. Why waste time? Enter the woman immediately — and he is +finished within minutes. But the woman was not a part, she was not aroused. That's why +women have a hankering that their lovers should touch their breasts, love their breasts — +a deep hankering. Only when their breasts have become filled with energy does their +second pole of the magnetic rod, which is negative, respond. Then they are alive to it, +then they can participate, then communication is possible — and then they will melt. +Foreplay is a must. + +Marriages become dry because in the beginning when you meet a new woman you play +with her body before. You are not certain whether she will allow you a direct approach, +so you play. You just feel the ground to see whether she is ready. But when she is your +wife, you take her for granted — there is no need. Wives are so dissatisfied with their +husbands, not because their husbands are not loving but because they are wrongly loving. +They don’t think that a woman exists in a different way; that her body responds in a +different way just opposite to them. + +This concentration at the breasts, melting into them, will give a new feeling to the female +meditator — a new feeling about her own body, because now from the center she can feel +the whole body vibrating. + +Just by loving the breasts of a woman she can be brought to a deep orgasm because the +negative pole will automatically go on responding. + +There are many other things. If you start from the breasts, meditating on the nipples, don’t +follow the route that you have read in books because that is meant for men. Simply don't +follow any chart, just allow the energy itself to move. It will happen in this way: with just +a vague suggestion your breasts will become filled with energy, they will radiate energy, +they will become hot, and then immediately your vagina will respond. And only after +your vagina responds and vibrates, will your kundalini start working. The route will be +different and the way the kundalini will arise will be different. + +In man it arises very actively, forcibly. That’s why they have called it a serpent rising. +Very forcibly, suddenly, with a jerk, the serpent unfolds. And it is felt on many points. +Those points are called chakras. Wherever there is resistance, the snake forces itself. Just +as the penis enters the vagina, so the passage is similar for man. When the energy arises it +is as if the penis inside is moving. + +And the snake is a phallic symbol. Really, not to use direct language, not to call it penis, +they have called it a snake. You must have heard the story of the Garden of Eden where +the serpent persuaded Eve to eat the fruit of the Tree of Knowledge. + +Now scholars are working and they say that this serpent is also just a phallic symbol, +used so as not to say it directly. So it is not a question, really, of eating the Fruit of +Knowledge; it is a question of sexuality. + +The same symbol has been used similarly in India: the serpent rises just like a penis +erecting in jerks, and moving inwards. + +This will not be the feeling for woman. The feeling will be quite the opposite. As a +woman feels when the penis has entered the vagina — the melting sensation, the +welcoming, the vagina giving way, vibrating very, very delicately, in a very receptive +mood, loving, welcoming — the same will be the phenomenon inside. When the energy +rises, it will be a receptive, passive rise, as if a passage is opening — not a serpent rising, +but a door opening, and a passage opening, and something giving way. It will be passive +and negative. With men something is entering; with women something is opening, not + + + +entering. + +But no one has worked on it, never before, because no one has taken any cognisance of +women. But for the future, I think that now it is a must — the feminine body should not be +neglected. Much research and work is needed, but it is very difficult to work because of +so much puritanical, moralistic nonsense. It is very difficult to work and to create a map +of how the feminine body will respond to the phenomena. + +But this is how I feel it will be; everything will be just the opposite. + +It must be so. It cannot be similar. But the ultimate thing will be the same. + + +THE END. + + + +Chapter 69: You are unknown to yourself + + +ABIDE IN SOME PLACE ENDLESSLY SPACIOUS, CLEAR OF TREES, HILLS, +HABITATIONS. THENCE COMES THE END OF MIND PRESSURES. + +CONSIDER THE PLENUM TO BE YOUR OWN BODY OF BLISS. + +Man is bom alone and dies alone, but between these two points he lives in society, he +lives with others. + +Aloneness is his basic reality; society is just accidental. And unless man can live alone, +can know his aloneness in its total depth, he cannot be acquainted with himself. All that +happens in society is just outer: it is not you, it is just your relations with others. You +remain unknown. From the outside you cannot be revealed. + +But we live with others. Because of this, self-knowledge is completely forgotten. You +know something about yourself, but indirectly — it is said to you by others. It is strange, +absurd, that others should tell you about yourself. Whatsoever identity you carry is given +to you by others; it is not real, it is just a labelling. A name is given to you. That name is +given as a label because it will be difficult for society to be related to a nameless person. +Not only is the name given, the very image that you think yourself to be is given by +society: that you are good, that you are bad, that you are beautiful, that you are +intelligent, that you are moral, a saint, or whatsoever. The image, the fonn, is also given +by society, and you don’t know what you are. + +Neither your name reveals anything, nor the form that society has given to you. You +remain unknown to yourself. + +This is the basic anxiety. You are there, but you are unknown to yourself. This lack of +knowledge about oneself is the ignorance, and this ignorance cannot be destroyed by any +knowledge which others can give to you. They can say to you that you are not this name, +you are not this form, you are 'soul eternal’, but that too, is given by others, that too is not +immediate. Unless you come to yourself directly, you will remain in ignorance. And +ignorance creates anxiety. You are not only afraid of others, you are afraid of yourself — +because you don’t know who you are and what is hidden in you. What is possible, what +will erupt out of you the next moment, you don’t know. You go on trembling and life +becomes a deep anxiety. There are many problems which create anxiety, but those +problems are secondary. If you penetrate deeply, then every problem will ultimately +reveal that the basic anxiety, the basic anguish, is that you are ignorant of yourself — of +the source from where you come, of the end to where you are moving, of the being whom +you are right now. + +Hence every religion says to move into solitude, into aloneness, so that you can for a time +leave society and all that society has given to you, and face yourself directly. + +Mahavir lived for twelve years alone in the forest. + +He would not speak during those days, because the moment you speak you have moved +into society. Language is society. He remained completely silent, he would not speak. + +The basic bridge had been cut so that he would be alone. When you don’t speak you are +alone, deeply alone. There is no way to move to the other. For twelve long years he lived +alone without speaking. What was he doing? He was trying to find out who he was. It is +better to put away all labels, it is better to move away from others so that there is no need + + + +for the social image. He was destroying the social image. He was throwing away all the +garbage that society had given; he was trying to be totally naked, without any name, +without any fonn. That;s what Mahavir;s nakedness means. It was not just throwing away +the clothes. It was deeper. It was the nudity of being totally alone. You also use clothes +for society: they are to hide your body, or they are to cover you in the eyes of others, +because society doesn't approve of your whole body. So whatsoever society doesn’t +approve of, you have to hide. Only particular parts of the body are allowed to be in the +open. The society chooses you in parts. Your totality is not approved of, not accepted. + +The same is happening with the mind — not only with the body. Your face is approved of, +your hands are approved of, but your whole body is not approved of, particularly the +parts of the body that can give any hint of sex. + +They are disapproved of, not accepted. Hence the importance of clothes. And this is +happening with the mind also: your total mind is not accepted, only parts of it. So you +have to hide the mind and suppress it. You cannot open your mind. You cannot open +your mind to your deepest friend because he will judge. He will say, "This is what you +think? This is what goes on in your mind?" So you have to give him only that which can +be accepted — a very minute part — and all else that is in you has to be hidden +completely. That hidden part creates many diseases. The whole psychoanalysis of Freud +consists only of bringing the hidden part out. It takes years before the person is healed. +But the psychoanalyst is not doing anything, he is simply bringing the suppressed part +out. Just to bring it out becomes a healing force. + +What does it mean? It means the suppression is the illness. It is a burden, a heavy burden. +You wanted to confess to someone; you wanted to tell, to express; you wanted someone +to accept you in totality. That is what love means — you will not be rejected. Whatsoever +you are — good, bad, saint, sinner — someone will accept you in your totalness, he will +not reject any part of you. That;s why love is the greatest healing force, it is the oldest +psychoanalysis. Whenever you love a person you are open to him, and just by being +open, your cut, divided parts are brought together. + +You become one. + +But even love has become impossible. Even with your wife you cannot tell the truth. + +Even with your lover you cannot be totally authentic, because even his or her eyes are +judging. He or she also wants an image to be followed, an ideal — your reality is not +important, the ideal is important. You know that if you express your totality you will be +rejected, you will not be loved. You are afraid, and because of this fear love becomes +impossible. Psychoanalysis brings the hidden part out, but the psychoanalyst is not doing +anything, he is simply sitting there listening to you. No one has listened to you it seems. +That is why you now need professional help. No one is ready to listen to you. No one has +the time. No one has much interest in you. So professional help has come into being — +you are paying someone to listen. And then year in, year out, he will listen to you every +day, or twice a week, or thrice a week, and you will be healed. This is miraculous! Why +should you be healed just by listening? It is because someone pays attention to you +without any judgement and you can tell anything that is in you. And just by telling, it +comes up and becomes a part of the conscious. When you cut off something, deny +something, prohibit something, suppress something, you are creating a division between +the conscious and the unconscious, the accepted and the rejected. This division has to be +thrown. + + + +Mahavir moved into aloneness so that he could be as he was with no fear of anybody. +Because he didn’t have to show a face to anybody he could throw away all the masks, all +the faces. Then he could be alone, totally naked, as he is under the stars, by the river and +in the forest. No one would judge him and no one would say, :You are not allowed to be +like this. You should behave. You should be like this." Leaving society means leaving the +situation where suppression has become inevitable. So nudity means to be as one is, with +no barriers, no withholding. Mahavir moved into silence, into loneliness, and he said, +"Unless I find myself — not the self that others have given to me, that is false, but the self +that I am born with — I will not return to society. Unless I know who I am I will not +return to society. Unless I have come directly face to face with my reality, unless I have +encountered the essential in men, not the accidental, I will not speak, because it is useless +to speak." + +You are the accidental. Whatsoever you think you are is the accidental part. For example, +you are bom in India. You could have been bom in England or in France or in Japan. + +That is the accidental part. But just by being born in India, you have a different identity. +You are a Hindu. You think yourself a Hindu — but you would have thought yourself a +Buddhist in Japan, or a Christian in England, or a communist in Russia. + +You have not done anything to be a Hindu, it is just an accident. Wherever you were you +would have joined yourself with the situation. You think yourself religious but your +religion is just accidental. 'If you have been born in a communist country, you would not +have been religious, you would have been as irreligious there as you are religious here. +You are born into a Jain family so you don;t believe in God without your having +discovered that there is no God. But just by the side of your house another child is born +on the same day, and he is a Hindu. He believes in God and you don;t. This is accidental, +it is not essential. It depends on circumstances. You speak Hindi, someone speaks +Gujarati, someone speaks French — these are accidents. Language is accidental. Silence +is essential; language is accidental. Your soul is essential; your self is accidental. And to +find the essential is the search, the only search. + +How to find the essential? Buddha moved in silence for six years. Jesus also moved into a +deep forest. His followers, the apostles wanted to go with him. They followed him and at +a certain moment, at a certain point, he said, "Stop. You should not come with me. Now I +must be alone with my God." He moved into the wilderness. When he came back he was +a totally different man; he had faced himself. + +Loneliness becomes the mirror. Society is the deception. That;s why you are always +afraid of being alone — because you will have to know yourself, and you will have to +know yourself in your nudity, in your nakedness. + +You are afraid. To be alone is difficult. Whenever you are alone, you immediately start +doing something so you are not alone. You may start reading the newspaper, or you may +put on the T.V., or you may go to some club to meet some friends, or you may go to visit +some family — but you must do something. Why? Because the moment you are alone +your identity melts, and all that you know about yourself becomes false and all that is +real starts bubbling up. + +All religions say that man must move into solitariness to know himself. One need not be +there forever, that is futile, but one has to be in solitude for a time, for a period. And the +length of the period will depend on each individual. Mohammed was in solitude for a few + + + +months; Jesus for only a few days; Mahavir for twelve years and Buddha for six years. It +depends. But unless you come to the point where you can say, "Now I have know the +essential," it is a must to be alone. + +This technique is concerned with loneliness. + +ABIDE IN SOME PLACE ENDLESSLY SPACIOUS, CLEAR OF TREES, HILLS, +HABITATIONS. THENCE COMES THE END OF MIND PRESSURES. + +Before we enter this technique three other points about loneliness must be understood. +One: to be alone is basic, foundational — that is how your being is. In the mother;s womb +you are alone, totally alone, and psychologists say that the hankering for nirvana, for +enlightenment, for salvation, for paradise, is really a deep imprinted memory of the +experience of the mother;s womb. + +You have known it — the total aloneness — and the bliss of it. You were alone, you were +God. No one else was there. No one disturbed you, no one interfered. Alone, you were +the master. With no conflict the peace was intrinsic. Silence was there, no language. You +were deep in yourself. You are not consciously aware of the fact but it is deeply +imprinted, it is there hidden in the unconscious. + +Because of this, psychologists say that everyone thinks that life in childhood was +beautiful. And ever country and every race thinks that somewhere in the past was the +Golden Age — somewhere in the past, life was blissful. Hindus call it SATYA-YUG, age +of truth. In the past, somewhere, the very, very past, before history began, everything was +beautiful and blissful. There was no conflict, no strife, no violence. Only love prevailed. +That was the Golden Age. Christians say that Adam and Eve lived in Eden, in the garden, +in absolute innocence and blissfulness. Then came the fall. So the Golden Age is before +the fall. Every country, every race, every religion, believes that the Golden Age was +somewhere in the past. And the strangeness is that howsoever deeply into the past you +move, this was always believed to be so, always. + +In Mesopotamia a stone has been found which is six thousand years old. There is an +inscription on it. If you read it you will feel that it is the editorial of today's morning +newspaper. + +The inscription says that this age is the age of sin. Everything has gone wrong. The son +doesn’t believe in the father, the wife doesn't believe in the husband. Darkness has set. +Where are those days, the days of the past, those golden days? This is a six thousand- +year-old inscription! Lao Tzu says that in the days of the past, in the days of the ancients, +everything was beautiful. Then Tao prevailed, then there was nothing wrong, and +because there was nothing wrong, no one preached. There was nothing wrong to be +changed, transformed, and there was no priest, no preacher, no moral leaders, because +everything was so right. Lao Tzu says that in those days, those old days, there was no +religion. There was no need because Tao prevailed. Everyone was so religious that there +was no need for religion. There were no sages then, because there were no sinners. +Everyone was such a sage that, naturally, no one was aware of who was a sage and who +was a sinner. + +Psychologists say that this past never existed. This past is just the deep memory within +every individual of the womb. It existed. Really, Tao was in the womb, and everything +was beautiful, everything was as it should be. Completely unaware of the world, the child +is moving in bliss. The situation of the child in the womb is just as it is for Vishnu on his +SHESHNAGA. Hindus believe that Vishnu is lying on his couch, a serpent couch, + + + +floating on the ocean of bliss. + + +Really, that is the child’s position in the womb. The child floats. The mother's womb is +just like the ocean. And you may be surprised to know that the water in which the child +floats in the mother's womb has the same constituents as the ocean water — very similar, +the same salts, everything. It is ocean water, soothing. And the womb always keeps the +right temperature for the child. The mother may be shivering with cold, that makes no +difference. For the child it is always the same temperature in the womb. He is wann, +blissfully floating, with no worries, no anxieties, no responsibilities, alone. He is not +aware of the mother; mother doesn’t exist for him. This SANSKAR, this imprint, is +carried on by you. This is the basic reality, how you were before you entered society, and +this will be the reality again when you go out of society and die. You will again be alone. +And between these two points of loneliness your life is filled with many events. But those +events are accidental. Deep down you remain alone because that is your basic reality. +Around that aloneness many things happen: you get married, you become two, then you +have children and you become many. Everything goes on happening — but just on the +periphery. The deep stratum remains totally alone. That is your reality. You may call this +your ATMA, your essence. + +In deep solitude this essence has to be recaptured. + +So when Buddha says that he has achieved nirvana, really he has achieved this loneliness, +this basic reality. Mahavir says he has achieved KAIVALYA. The very word +KAIVALYA, means loneliness, the alone. Just below the turmoil of events that aloneness +is there. It runs through you like a thread running in a mala. The beads are apparent, but +the thread is not. But the beads are hanging on the thread, and the beads are many and the +thread is one. Really, the mala is a symbol of this reality. The thread is the reality and the +beads are just the events which go on hanging on it. And unless you penetrate and come +to the basic thread, you will be in anguish, you will be in suffering. + +You have a history — that history is accidental. And you have a nature — that nature is +non-historical. You are born on a certain date, to certain parents, in a certain society, in a +certain age. You are educated in a certain way. Then you enter a particular profession, +you fall in love with a woman, you have children. These dramas are beads, events, +history, but deep down you are always alone. And if you forget yourself completely +because of these events you have missed the very purpose of being here. Then you have +lost yourself in the drama and you have forgotten the actor who was not part of it, who +was just playing the role. All these things are roles. + +Because of this India does not have written histories. + +Really, it is very difficult to be certain about when Krishna was born, when he died; +when Ram was born, when he died — or whether he was ever born or not or is just a +myth. We have not written his history, and this is the reason: we in India are concerned +with the thread and not with the beads. Really, in the religious world, Christ is the first +historical person, but had he been born in India he would not have been historical. We in +India are always looking for the thread, the beads are irrelevant. But the West is more +oriented towards events, facts — temporal things — than to the essential and the eternal. +History is the drama. In India, we say that Ramas and Krishnas go on being born in every +age. They have been repeated many times before and they will be repeated many times +afterwards. So there is no need to carry on the records. When they are born is irrelevant. + + + +What their being is — the thread — that is the meaningful. So we are not concerned if they +were really historical persons or not, we are not concerned with outer things that happen +to a being, we are concerned with the being itself and whether anything happens to it or +not. + +When you move into solitude you are moving to the thread; when you move into +solitude, you are moving into nature. If you are really alone, not even thinking of others, +you will feel the world of nature around you for the first time. + +You will become attuned to it. Right now you are attuned to society. If you fall from this +attunement to society, you will be attuned to nature. When the rains come — they are +always coming but you cannot understand the language of the rains — they don’t say +anything to you, they don’t mean anything to you; at the most some utilitarian thing about +water being needed is realized. So there is some use, but you don't have any dialogue, +you cannot understand the language of the rains, the rain has no personality for you. But +if you leave society for a time and remain in aloneness, you will start feeling a new +phenomenon: the rains will come and they will talk to you. Then you will feel their +moods — some day the rain is very angry and some day it is very soothing and loving. +Some day the whole sky is depressed, and some day it is dancing. Some day the sun rises +as if without any will of its own, forced, doing the work; and some day on its own — now +it is not a work but a play. + +You will feel all the moods around you. Nature has its own language but it is silent, and +unless you are silent you cannot understand it. + +The first layer of attunement is with society, the second layer of attunement is with +nature, and the third layer, the deepest, is with Tao or DHARMA. That is the pure +existence. Then the tree, then the rains, then the clouds, they are also left behind. + +Then, just existence.... Existence has no moods. Existence is always the same. Existence +is always the same: always festive, exploding with energy. But one has first to move from +society to nature — then from nature to existence. When you are attuned with existence +you are totally alone, but this aloneness is different from that of the child in the womb. +The child is alone, but it is not that he is really alone, he is unaware of anything else. He +is enclosed in darkness, that's why he feels alone. The whole world exists around him but +he is not aware of it. His aloneness is that of ignorance. When you become consciously +silent, one with existence, your aloneness will not be surrounded by darkness, it will be +surrounded by light. + +For the child in the womb the world is not, because he is unaware. For you the world will +not be, because the world and you have become one. + +When you reach the deepest being you are alone again because the ego is lost. The ego is +given by society. It can persist a little even when you are in nature although it will not be +as much as it is in society. When you move alone, your ego starts disappearing — because +it is always in relationship. Look at this phenomenon: with every individual your ego +changes. If you are talking to your servant, look inside, look at the ego, see how it is. If +you are talking to your friend, look within, see how the ego is. + +You are talking to your beloved, look within, see whether the ego is or is not. If you are +talking to an innocent child, look within — the ego will not be there because it will be +stupid to be an egoist with an innocent child. You will feel that this would be stupid, so +while playing with children you become a child. The child doesn’t know the language of + + + +ego. And being egoistic with a child you will look awkward. So when you play with +children they pull you down. They bring you back to your own childhood. When you are +talking with a dog, or playing with a dog, the ego that the society has given to you cannot +exist because with a dog there is no question of ego. If you are walking with your dog — a +very beautiful and costly dog — and someone crosses the street, even the dog seems to +give you ego. But the dog is not giving you ego, it is the man who is passing. You +become straight, you feel elated because you have a very beautiful dog and the man looks +jealous. + +The ego is there. If you move into a forest the ego disappears. Hence the insistence of all +religions to move, at least for a time, into the world of nature. + +This sutra is simple: ABIDE IN SOME PLACE ENDLESSLY SPACIOUS - on some +hilltop from where you can see endlessly, from where the vision never comes to any end. +If you can see endlessly and there is no end to your vision, the ego will dissolve. Ego +needs limits, boundaries. + +The more defined the boundaries, the easier it is for the ego to exist. + +ABIDE IN SOME PLACE ENDLESSLY SPACIOUS, CLEAR OF TREES, HILLS, +HABITATIONS. THENCE COMES THE END OF MIND PRESSURES. + +Mind is very subtle. You can live on a hilltop where there is no one, but if you can see a +cottage deep down in the valley you will start talking with that cottage, you will be in +relationship with it — the society has come. You don’t know who lives there, but someone +lives there, and that becomes the boundary — you will start dreaming about who lives +there and your eyes will search each day to see who lives there. The cottage will become +a symbol of humanity. So the sutra says WITHOUT HABITATIONS — even without +trees, because it has been known that people who live alone start talking with trees. They +make friendships, they create a dialogue. You cannot understand the difficulty of a man +who has gone to be lonely. He wants someone so he will say "Hello" to the tree and +"How are you?" And trees are beings. If you are really honest, they will start replying, +there will be a response. So you can create a society. + +The meaning is this: be in some place and be alert that you don’t create a society again. +You may start tending a tree, loving a tree. You may feel that the tree is feeling thirsty so +you should bring some water — you have started a relationship and with a relationship +you are not alone. + +So this is the emphasis: move to such a place but have it in your mind that you are not +going to create any relationship. Leave all relationship and the world of relationship +behind, and be alone there. In the beginning it is going to be very difficult because your +mind is created by society. You can leave society but where will you leave the mind? The +mind will follow you like a shadow. The mind will haunt you. The mind will start +torturing you. Faces will come in your dreams — they will try to pull you. You will try to +meditate but thoughts will not cease. You will start thinking of your house, you will start +thinking of your wife, of your children. It is human. + +And it does not happen to you only — it has happened to Buddha and to Mahavir. It has +happened to everyone. Even a Buddha is bound to think of Yashodhara during six long +years of loneliness. In the beginning, when the mind was following him, he must have +been sitting under a tree pretending to meditate, and Yashodhara must have followed +him. He loved that woman. And he must have felt guilty because he had left her — and +without saying anything to her. Nowhere is it mentioned that he thought about + + + +Yashodhara, but I say he must have thought of her. It is so human; it is so natural. To +think that he never thought again of Yashodhara would be very inhuman and would not +be fair to Buddha. Only by and by, after a long struggle, would he have been able to +throw off the mind. + + +But mind will persist because it is nothing but society — society internalized. Society has +entered into you — that is your mind. You can escape from society, the outer reality, but +the inner will follow you. + +Many times Buddha must have been talking with Yashodhara, with his father, with the +small child he left behind. The face of his child must have followed him. It was there in +his mind when he left. The night he left he went into Yashodhara's room, just to see the +child for the last time. The child was only one day old. Yashodhara was sleeping and the +child was clinging to her breast. He looked at the child. He wanted to take the child into +his hands because this was his last opportunity. He had not touched him yet and now he +might never return so there would be no meeting. He was leaving the world. He wanted +to touch and kiss the child but then he became afraid because if he took the child up in +his hands, Yashodhara might be awakened. Then it would be very difficult for him to +leave — she would start weeping and crying. He had a human heart. It was beautiful that +he thought of it: that if she started crying it would be very difficult for him to leave. Then +all that he had created in his mind — that this world was useless and futile — would +disappear. He would not be able to see Yashodhara crying. He loved that woman. So he +left. He moved out of the room without making any noise. + + +This man could not leave Yashodhara and the child easily. No one could. When he was +begging it was bound to come to his mind — his palace and everything. He was a beggar +of his own accord. The past would persist, it would hammer the mind again and again, +"Come back." Many times he would think, "I have made a mistake." It is bound to be so. +Nowhere is this recorded and sometimes I think about making a diary about what +happened to Buddha’s mind during those six years — a diary about what happened to his +mind, what was going on. + +Mind will follow like a shadow wherever you go. So it is not going to be easy. It has +never been easy for anyone. It will be a long struggle to make yourself again and again +alert; again and again to be a witness; again and again not to fall a victim. And to the very +last the mind follows. Unless you are desperate, unless you feel that you are incurable, +that nothing can be done, the mind will go on haunting you. It will try in every way. It +will create fantasies, reveries, dreams; it will create all types of allurements, seductions. + +It is written in the lives of all the seers that Satan comes, the Devil comes, to seduce. No +one comes — only your mind. Your mind is the only Devil and no one else. It will try in +every way. It will say to you, "I will give you the whole world, come back." It will make +you depressed, "You are a fool — the whole world is enjoying and you have come to this +hilltop. You are mad. All this religious stuff is humbug, come back. Look, the whole +world is not insane and they are enjoying." And the mind will give such beautiful +pictures of everyone who is enjoying and the whole world will be more attractive to you +than ever. All that you have left behind will pull you backwards. + +This is the basic struggle. And this is just because the mind is a mechanism of habits, of +mechanical persistence. On the hilltop the mind will feel like hell — nothing is good + + + +there, everything is wrong. The mind will create negativity all around you, "What are you +doing here? Have you gone mad?" The world that you have left behind will become more +and more beautiful to your eyes and the place that you are in will become more and more +ugly. But if you persist and you remain aware that this is what the mind is doing, this is +what the mind is bound to do, and if you don’t get identified with the mind, a moment +comes when the mind leaves you, and with it all the pressures. When the mind leaves +you, you are unburdened, because it is the only burden. Then there is no worry, no +thought, no anxiety, you have entered the womb of existence. Unworried, you float. A +deep silence explodes within you. + +The sutra says, THENCE COMES THE END OF MIND PRESSURES. In such solitude, +in such loneliness, one thing more has to be remembered: the crowd exerts a deep +pressure on you, whether you know it or not. + + +Now, after working on animals, scientists have come to a very basic law. They say that +every animal has a certain space as his territory. If you enter that space then the animal +becomes tense and he will attack you, Every animal has a certain space around him. He +will not allow anybody to enter, because the moment someone enters, he feels the +pressure. You hear many birds singing in the trees. You don’t know what they are doing. +Scientists say now, after years of study, that whenever a bird is singing in the trees he is +doing many things. One, he is calling for his girlfriend. Another, he is alerting all the +male competitors that this is his territory — don’t enter it. And if someone enters the +territory a fight will ensue. And the girlfriend will just wait and see who wins, because +whoever gets the territory will get her/ She will just wait, and the one who wins will stay +there and the one who is defeated will have to leave. By many means every animal +creates territory: by sound, by singing, by body odor. No other competitor should enter +that territory. + +You may have seen dogs pissing all around. Scientists say that they create their territory +by pissing. The dog will go and piss on this pole and on that pole. He will not piss on one +place — why? You can do it on one place, why move so much? He is creating territory. +His urine has a particular odor and with it he creates a territory. + +No one should enter, it is dangerous. He lives secluded in his own territory, master of it. +There are many studies going on. They have tried putting many animals in one cage with +all their needs fulfilled — better than they can fulfil them themselves in a forest. But they +go mad because they don't have space. When someone is always around they are tense, +afraid, ready to fight. This constant readiness to fight gives such tensions that there heart +failures or they go mad. Animals even commit suicide because the pressure becomes so +much. And many abnonnalities develop which are never found in the wild state. + +Monkeys in the wild are totally different. When caged in a zoo they start behaving +abnormally. In the beginning it was thought that it was the bondage that was creating the +problem. Now it is known that it is not the bondage. If you give them the proper space +that they need in a cage they are happy. Then there is no problem. But they have an +intrinsic feeling of space. When someone enters that space, pressure comes to their +minds. Their minds start to be tense, strained; they cannot sleep right, they cannot feed +right, they cannot love right. + +Because of these studies, scientists now say that the whole of humanity is going crazy +and mad because of too much over-population. The pressure is so great. You are never + + + +left alone: in the train, in the bus, in the office, everywhere, crowds and crowds. + + +Man also has a need of space, to be left alone. But there is no place, you are never alone. +When you come to your home, your wife is there, the children are there, and the relatives +keep on coming. And they still think that the guest is God! You are already crazy because +the pressure is too much all around you. You cannot say to anyone, "Leave me alone." If +you say to your wife, "Leave me alone," she will get angry, "What do you mean?" She +has been waiting for you the whole day. Mind needs space to be relaxed. + +This sutra is really beautiful and very scientific. THENCE COMES THE END OF MIND +PRESSURES. + +When you move alone on a solitary hilltop you have space all around you, endless space. +The pressure of the crowd, the pressure of others around you, leaves you. Y ou will sleep +more deeply. You will have a different quality of awakening in the morning. You will +feel free. An inner pressure circle is not there. You will feel unimprisoned, unfettered. +This is good. But we have become so addicted to crowds that only for a few days — three +or four days — will you feel good, then the desire will arise to go again to the crowd. +Every holiday you go on, you want to come back after three days. Because of the pattern, +the habit, you feel useless. Alone, you feel useless, alone you cannot do anything, and +even if you do something, no one will know about it, no one will see you doing it, no one +will appreciate it. + +You cannot do anything alone because all your life you have been doing something for +others. You feel useless. + +So remember, if you ever try this solitary madness, drop the idea of utility. Be useless. +Only then can you be alone. Because really, utility has been forced on your mind by +society. Society says, "Be of some utility. Don’t be useless." Society want you to be an +economic unit, a thing, efficient, utilitarian. Society doesn’t want you to be just a flower. +No, even if you are a flower then you must be worth being sold. Society needs you to be +in the market, you must have some utility. Only then are you of use, otherwise not. +Society goes on preaching that use is the goal of life, the purpose of life. This is +nonsense. + +I am not saying be useless. I am saying that this use is not the goal. You have to live in +society, to be useful to it, but to remain capable of being useless at any moment. That +capacity must be retained otherwise you become a thing and not a person. When you +move into solitariness, aloneness, this will become a problem. You will feel yourself +useless. + +I have been working with many people. Sometimes I suggest that they go for three weeks +or three months into total loneliness, silence. And I tell them that after seven days they +will want to come back and their mind will find all the reasons for not being there so that +they can come back. + +I tell them not to listen to those arguments and to make it a point that for the time they +have decided upon they will not leave. They say to me that they are going of their own +will, so why should they leave? I tell them that they don’t know themselves. This will not +be there for more than three to seven days; afterwards they will long to return, because +society has become alcoholic, it is an intoxicant. In sober moments you can think about +being alone, but when you are alone, within three days you will think, "What am I +doing?" Remember, use is for society. Society uses you and you use society. This is a + + + +reciprocal relationship. + +But life is not for use. It is non-utilitarian, purposeless, it is a play, a celebration. So when +you move into solitariness to do this technique, be prepared from the very beginning that +you are going to be useless, and enjoy it, don’t feel sad about it. You cannot conceive of +what arguments the mind will bring. You will say, "The world is in such trouble and you +are sitting in silence here. Look what is happening in Vietnam and what is happening in +Pakistan and what is happening in China; and your country is dying, there is no food, +there is no water. What are you doing here meditation? What is the use? Will it bring +socialism to the country?" Mind will bring beautiful arguments; mind is the great arguer. +It is the Devil — it will try to persuade you, it will convince you that you are wasting +time. + +But don't listen to it. From the very beginning be prepared, "I am going to waste time. I +will not be of any use. I will simply enjoy being here." + +And don’t be concerned with the world. The world goes on. It is always in trouble. It has +been always in trouble and it will remain always in trouble. That is the way of the world. +You cannot do anything so don't try to be a great world reformer, a revolutionary, a +messiah. Don't try. + +You simply be yourself and enjoy your solitariness, just like a rock or a tree or a river. +Useless! What is the use of a rock just lying there under the rains, under the sun, under +the stars? What is the use of this rock? No use — the rock enjoys itself being that way. + +Just be a rock. There are rock gardens in Japan, in Zen monasteries; they make rock +gardens particularly for this. There are no trees in the garden, just sand and rock. A +solitary rock, just sits there, and the master says to the disciple, "Go, and be just a rock, +just like that rock. Don’t be bothered about the world. That rock remains there whatsoever +happens to the world. It is not worried. It is always in meditation." + +Unless you are really prepared to be useless, you cannot be solitary, you cannot be in +solitude. And once you know the depth of it you can come back to society. You must +come back because solitariness is not a style of life — it is just a training. + +It is not a way of life, it is just a deep relaxation to change the perspective. It is just +falling out of step with society to have a look at yourself, who you are, alone. So don’t +think that this is a style of life. Many have made it a style of life. They are in error. They +are absolutely in error. They have made a medicine food. It is not a style of life, it is just +medicinal. You fall out for a time being just to have a perspective, a distance, to see what +you are and what society is doing to you. When you are out of it, you can have a better +look. You can observe. Without being concerned, without being in it, you can become an +observer from the hilltop, you can become a witness. You are so far away. Unprejudiced, +undisturbed, you can look. + +So note it, this is not a way of life. I am not saying leave the world and become hennits +somewhere in the Himalayas — no. But sometimes leave, relax, be useless, be alone, exist +like a rock, be independent, free from the world, be a part of nature — and you will be +rejuvenated, reborn. Then come back and move in society and in the crowd again. And +try to carry that beauty, that silence that happened to you when you were alone. Now +carry it, don't lose contact with it. Move deep into the crowd but don't become a part of it. +Let the crowd be there outside you — you remain alone. + +And when you become capable of being alone in the crowd, you have achieved real +aloneness. + + + +It is easy to be alone on a hilltop. The whole of nature helps you, and nothing is a barrier. +To be back in the market-place, in the shop, in the office, in the family, and to remain +alone — that is an achievement. Then it is something you have achieved and it is not just +accidental, something that happened because of the hills. Now the quality of +consciousness has changed. So remain alone in the crowd. The crowd will be there +outside but don't allow it to enter in. Protect whatsoever you have gained. Defend it, don't +allow it to be disturbed. And whenever you feel that the feeling has become dull, that you +are missing it, that society has disturbed it, that the dust has gathered around, that the +fresh spring is no longer fresh, that it is polluted — move again. Fall out of society to +renew it, to make it alive again. Then come back and move in the crowd. And then a +moment will come when that original spring will remain fresh and no one will be able to +pollute it or contaminate it. Then there is no need to move anywhere. + +So this is just a technique, not a style of life. Don't become a monk, don’t become a nun, +don't move to a monastery to live there forever. That is nonsense. If you live forever in a +monastery you will never be able to know whether you have attained what you have +attained, or whether the monastery has just given it to you. It may be accidental, not +essential. + +The essential has to be tested. The essential has to be set against society; it has to be +brought to the touch-stone. And when it never breaks, when you can depend on it, when +nothing can change it, then it has become a crystallization. + +The second technique: + +CONSIDER THE PLENUM TO BE YOUR OWN BODY OF BLISS. + +This second technique is concerned with the first. Consider space to be your own body of +bliss. Meditating on a hilltop with endless space before you, you can do it. Consider it to +be filled with your own body of bliss. + +There are seven bodies. The bliss body is the last body, so the more you enter within, the +more you feel yourself to be blissful. You are nearing the bliss body, the layer of bliss. It +is just around your essential soul, which is the first body from within outwards, or the last +body from without inwards. Just around your being, the essential soul, is the layer of +bliss. It is called the bliss body. Sitting on a hilltop, looking at the endless sky, feel that +the whole space, the whole plenum, is filled with your bliss body. Feel that your bliss +body has increased and the whole space is filled with it. + +How will you feel it? You don’t know what bliss is so how to imagine it? It will be better +to try first to feel that the whole space is filled with silence, not with bliss. Feel it filled +with silence. Nature will be helpful about it because in nature even noises are silent. + +In cities even silence is noisy. Natural sounds are silent because they don't disturb. They +are harmonious. So don't think that silence is necessarily soundlessness. No, a musical +sound can be silence because it is so harmonious — it doesn’t disturb you. Rather, it +deepens your silence. So when you move into nature, the breeze blowing, the stream, the +river, the wind or whatsoever sounds there are, are harmonious, they make a whole. They +are not disturbing. You can listen to them and the very listening will deepen your silence. +So first feel that the whole space is filled with silence; feel deeply that it is growing more +and more silent, that the sky has become silence around you. + +And when you feel that the sky has become silence, only then should you try to be filled +with bliss. As silence deepens you will have the first glimpse of bliss. As tension +increases, you have the first glimpse of misery, strain; as silence deepens you will feel at + + + +ease, at home, relaxed, and the first glimpse of bliss will come to you. And when that +glimpse comes, then you can imagine that the whole space is now filled with that bliss. +CONSIDER THE PLENUM TO BE YOUR OWN BODY OF BLISS. The whole sky +becomes your body of bliss. + +You can do it separately, there is no need to join it to the first, but the same requirements +are needed — endless space, silence, no human beings around you. + +Why this insistence on no human beings around you? Because the moment you see a +human being you will start reacting in the old ways. You cannot see a human being +without reacting. Something or other will happen to you immediately. He brings you +back to your old patterns. If you don’t see human beings you forget that you are human, +and to forget that you are human, part of society, is good. It is good to remember that +simply you are, even if you don’t know what. You don’t belong to anybody, to any +society, to any group, to any religion. This non-belonging will be helpful. + +So it will be good if you move alone somewhere and do this, practise this. Alone this +technique will be helpful, but remember to start with something that you can feel. I have +seen people doing techniques which they cannot feel. If you cannot feel, if you don’t have +any experience, even a glimpse, then the whole thing becomes false. A man came to me +and he said, "I am practising that God is everywhere." So I asked him, "How can you +practise? What do you imagine? Have you any taste, any feeling of God? Only then will +it be easy to imagine. Otherwise, you will be simply thinking that you are imagining and +nothing will happen." + +Remember this for any technique you do — at the start you must do something you are +acquainted with; you may not be totally acquainted with it, but a little glimpse will be +necessary. + +Only then can you progress, step by step. But don’t jump into something which is +absolutely unknown to you because then you cannot feel it and you cannot imagine it. +Because of this, many masters, particularly Buddha, completely dropped the word 'God’. +Buddha said, "You cannot work with it. It is the very end, and you cannot bring the end +into the beginning. So begin from the very beginning." He said, "Forget the end, the end +will follow automatically." And he said to his disciples, "Don’t think of God. Think of +compassion. Think of love." So he doesn’t say that one should feel that God is +everywhere, one should simply feel compassion for everyone who is there — for the tree, +for human beings, for animals. Simply feel compassion. Feel sympathetic, create a love... +because love you know, howsoever little. There has been something like love in +everybody’s life. You may not have loved, but someone may have loved you, your +mother at least. You must have looked into her eyes: she loved you. + +"Just be motherly to existence," Buddha says, "and feel deep compassion. Feel that the +whole world is filled with your compassion. Then everything else will follow." +Remember this as a basic law: always start with something you can feel because only +then can the unknown enter through it. + + +THE END. + + + +Chapter 70: Aloneness is pain + + +The first question: + +Question 1 + +CONFRONTATION OF ONESELF IN ALONENESS IS VERY FEARFUL, VERY +PAINFUL. WHAT TO DO? + +It is fearful and it is painful, and one has to suffer it. Nothing should be done to avoid it, +nothing should be done to divert the mind, nothing should be done to escape fonn it. One +has to suffer it and go through it. This suffering, this pain, is just a good sign that you are +near a new birth, because every birth is preceded by pain. It cannot be avoided, and it +should not be avoided because it is part of your growth. This pain and this suffering is +kn own traditionally as TAPASHCHARYA, austerity. This is the meaning of TAPAS — +arduous austerity, effort. + +But why is this pain there? This should be understood because understanding will help +you to go through it, and if you go through it knowingly, you will come out of it more +easily, and sooner. + +Why is there pain when you are alone? The first thing is that your ego gets ill. Your ego +can exist only with others. It has grown in relationship, it cannot exist alone. So if the +situation is one in which it can exist no more, it feels suffocated, it feels just on the verge +of death. This is the deepest suffering. You feel just as if you are dying, but it is not you +who is dying but only the ego which you have taken to be yourself, with which you have +become identified. + +It cannot exist because it has been given to you by others. It is a contribution. + +When you leave others you cannot carry it with you. Think of it in this way: when you +are in society, people think you are a very good person. This goodness cannot exist when +you are lonely and alone because this is what people thought about you. Now those +people are there no more. Your image cannot be helped. It has become foundationless. + +By and by it will disappear and you will feel very bad because you were such a good +person and now you are no more. And not only good people will suffer, if you are a bad +person that too was given by others to you. That too is a way of getting attention. When +many people consider you bad they give you attention. They cannot be indifferent to you, +they have to be aware of you. You are somebody, a bad man, dangerous. When you move +into loneliness, you become nobody. That bad image will disappear and you were feeding +on it, your ego was feeding on it. So bad men and good men are not basically different — +both are gaining their egos. Their mediums differ, but their goals are the same. + +The bad depends on others, the good also. They exist in society. The saint and the sinner, +they exist in society. Alone you are neither a saint nor a sinner. So in aloneness all that +you know about yourself will fall; by and by it will disappear. You can prolong your ego +for a certain period — and that too you will have to do through imagination — but you +cannot prolong it for long. + +Without society you are uprooted; the soil is not there from where to get food. This is the +basic pain. You are no longer sure who you are: you are just a dispersing personality, a +dissolving personality. But this is good, because unless this false you disappears, the real +cannot emerge. Unless you are completely washed and become again clean, the real + + + +cannot emerge. + +This false you is occupying the throne. It must be dethroned. By living in solitariness all +that is false can go. And all that is given by society is false — really, all that is given is +false, all that is born with you is real. All that is you by yourself, not contributed by +someone else, is real, authentic. But the false must go. And the false is a great +investment: you have invested so much in it, you have been looking after it so much. All +your hopes hang on it. So when it starts dissolving you will feel fearful, afraid, trembling. +What are you doing to yourself? You are destroying your whole life, the whole structure. +There will be fear. But you have to go through this fear, only then will you become +fearless. I don't say you will become brave, no. I say you will become fearless. Bravery is +just part of fear. Howsoever brave you are, the fear is hidden behind. I say fearless. You +will not be brave, there is no need to be brave when there is no fear. Bravery and fear +both become irrelevant. They are both aspects of the same coin. + +So your brave men are nothing but you standing on your head — just in SHIRSHASAN. +Your bravery is hidden within you and your fear is on the surface; their fear is hidden +within and their bravery is on the surface. So when you are alone you are very brave, +when you think about something you are very brave, but when a real situation comes you +are fearful. It is said about soldiers, the greatest of them, that before going to the front +they are as afraid as anyone. + +The inside is trembling, but they will go. They will push this trembling aside into the +unconscious; and the more the inner trembling is there, the more they will create a facade +that they are brave around them. They will create an armor. You look at that annor — it +looks brave, but deep down they are fdled with fear. One becomes fearless only when +one has gone through the deepest fear of all — that is the dissolving of the ego, the +dissolving of the image, the dissolving of the personality. + +This is death because you don’t know if a new life is going to emerge out of it — during +the process you will know only death. Only when you are dead as you are, as the false +entity, only then will you know that the death was just a door to immortality. But that +will be the end. During the process you are simply dying. Everything that you cherished +so much is being taken away from you — your personality, your ideas, all that you +thought was beautiful. + + +All is leaving you. You are being denuded. All the roles and robes are being taken away. +In the process fear will be there, but this fear is basic, necessary, inevitable — one has to +pass through it. Y ou should understand it, but don’t try to avoid it, don’t try to escape +from it because every escape will bring you back again, you will move back into the +personality. + +Those who go into deep silence and solitude, they always ask me, "There will be fear, so +what to do?" I tell them not to do anything, just to live the fear. If trembling comes, +tremble, why prevent it? If an inner fear is there, and you are shaking with it, so shake +with it. Don’t do anything. Allow it to happen. It will go by itself. If you avoid it — and +you can avoid it. You can start chanting Ram, Ram, Ram; you can cling to a mantra so +that your mind is diverted. You will be pacified and the fear will not be there — you have +pushed it into the unconscious. It was coming out — which was good, you were going to +be free from it — it was leaving you and when it leaves you, you will tremble. That is +natural because from every cell of the body, of the mind, some energy which has always + + + +been there pushed down, is leaving. There will be a shaking, a trembling; it will be just +like an earthquake. The whole soul will be disturbed by it but let it be. Don't do anything. +That is my advice. Don't even chant the name of Ram. + +Don't try to do anything with it because all that you can do will again be suppression. Just +by allowing it to be, by letting it be, it will leave you — and when it has left, you will be +altogether a different man. + +The cyclone has gone and you will now be centered, centered as you never were before. +And once you know the art of letting things be, you will know one of the master keys +which opens all the inner doors. Then whatsoever the case is, let it be, don’t avoid it. + +If just for three months you can be in total solitude, in total silence, not fighting with +anything, allowing everything to be, whatsoever it is, within three months the old will be +gone and the new will be there. But the secret is allowing it to be, howsoever fearful, +painful, howsoever apparently dangerous, deathlike. Many moments will come when you +will feel as if you will go mad if you don’t do something and involuntarily you will start +to do something. You may know that nothing can be done, but you will not be in control +and you will start to do something. + +It is just as if you are moving through a dark street in the night, midnight, and you feel +fear because there is no one around and the night is dark and the street is unknown — so +you start whistling. What can whistling do? You know it can do nothing. Then you start +singing a song. You kn ow nothing can be done by singing a song, the darkness cannot be +dispelled, you will remain alone, but still, it diverts the mind. + +If you start whistling, just by whistling you gain confidence and you forget the darkness. +Your mind moves into whistling and you start feeling good. + +Nothing has happened. The street is the same, the darkness is the same, the danger, if +there is any, is there, but now you feel more protected. All is the same, but now you are +doing something. You can start chanting a name, a mantra, Ram, Ram, that will be a sort +of whistling. It will give you strength. But that strength is dangerous, that strength will +again become a problem, because that strength is going to be your old ego. You are +reviving it again. + +Remain a witness, and allow whatsoever happens to happen. Fear has to be faced to go +beyond it. Anguish has to be faced to transcend it. And the more authentic the encounter, +the more face to face, the more looking at things as they are, the sooner the happening +will be there. + +It takes time only because your authenticity is not intense. So you may take three days, +three months, or three lives — it depends on the intensity. Really, three minutes can also +do — three seconds can also do. But then you will have to pass through a tremendous hell, +with such an intensity that you may not be able to bear it, to tolerate it. If one can face +whatsoever is hidden in oneself, it passes, and when it has gone, you are different. +Because all that has left you was part of you before, and now it is no longer a part. + + +So don’t ask what to do. There is no need to do anything. Non-doing, witnessing, +effortlessly facing whatsoever is, not even making a slight effort, just allowing it to be... +remain passive and let it pass. It always passes. When you do something, that is the +undoing because then you interfere. + +And who will interfere? Who is afraid? The same which is the disease will interfere. The + + + +same ego which has to be left behind, will interfere. + +I told you that the ego is part of the society. You left the society but you don't want to +leave the part that society has given to you. It is rooted in society; it cannot live without +society. So either you have to leave it or you have to create a new society in which it can +live. + +So you can create an alternative society. That is one of the greatest tricks of the mind. It +has always been so. You can create a different society. You can create an ashram. + +Twenty people who think they want to live in solitude can create a monastery — then the +monastery has become an alternative society. So they move from society but they create +another society, so basically nothing changes. They remain the same. Rather on the +contrary, they may become more egoistic because now they are the chosen few, the elect. +They have left the world but they have created another world, and the same pattern of +relationship moves again. Then there is the chief, then there are the disciples, then there +is a master, and all hierarchy and everything comes in, in miniature form. + +And then there are good disciples, there are bad disciples, there are successful ones and +the unsuccessful ones... so it is the same. In a small group the whole society is there. + +That will not do. Now this is happening in the West. A great number of young people are +leaving society because they feel that society is rotten, decadent, dying, and they feel it is +so decadent that it cannot be changed. This is a very new thing. Young people always +think that the society is rotten, but they think it can be changed, transfonned, so a +revolution is needed. Only in the last stage of a society or civilization does this happen — +people start thinking that nothing can be done, that revolution is nonsense, that society is +so dead that no one can revive it, that you cannot change it. So you just drop out of it. +You cannot do anything, the house is on fire — so you simply escape from it. This is what +is happening in the West: hippies, beatniks, yippies, others, all dropping out of society. +But they are creating another society, an alternative society. Hippies themselves have +become an alternative society. + +In ordinary society if you have long hair, others will look at you as if you have gone +astray. Something is wrong. In the hippie society if you have short hair, you are wrong! +Something is wrong with you. What is the difference? + +In ordinary society if you live in a dirty way you are wrong — you are unmannerly, +uncultivated, uneducated, unacceptable. + +But in a hippie society if you live very cleanly then something is wrong with you. Then +you are still clinging to the old mind which said that cleanliness is next to God, God has +died a long time ago, now the second thing, cleanliness, has also died. It cannot exist +without God. + +The same condemnation and the same appreciation is there. You can create an alternative +society with just the opposite rules but it makes no difference — your ego can be fed +again. It has been transplanted. A new soil has been fonned. + +To be solitary means not to create an alternative society. Just move out of society, and +then whatsoever society has given you will leave you. It can exist only in a milieu, in the +social milieu, it cannot exist out of it. You will have to drop it It will be painful because +you are so adjusted to it, everything is so arranged. It has become such a comfort to be +adjusted, where everything is convenient. When you change and move alone, you are +leaving all comforts, all conveniences, all that society can give — and when society gives +something to you, it also takes something from you: your liberty, your soul. + + + +So it is an exchange — and when you are trying to get to your soul in its purity you have +to stop the bargaining. It will be painful, but if you can pass through it, the highest bliss is +just near. Society is not as painful as loneliness; society is tranquillizing; society is +convenient, comfortable. + +But it gives you a sort of sleep. If you move out of it inconvenience is bound to be there. +All types of inconveniences will be there. Those inconveniences have to be suffered with +the understanding that they are part of solitude, part of regaining yourself. + +This is TAPAS, this is austerity, and you will come out of it new, with a new glory and +dignity, a new purity and innocence. + +The second question: + +Question 2 + +LAST NIGHT YOU SAID THAT TOTAL ALONENESS IS THE ESSENTIAL +NATURE, IS THE ULTIMATE REALITY OF MAN. ANOTHER DAY YOU +EXPLAINED THAT INDIVIDUALITY IS FALSE AND MAN IS A WAVE IN THE +ORGANIC WHOLE OF EXISTENCE. HOW IS A RECONCILIATION POSSIBLE +BETWEEN ALONENESS AND WHOLENESS? + +There is no need of reconciliation. Aloneness is wholeness. But aloneness doesn’t mean +individuality. You are an individual because of society. When you are totally alone you +will not be an individual. + +An individual means a part of a society, a unit of a society. When you are in the crowd +you are an individual; when you move out of the crowd not only is the crowd dropping +behind, the individual also is dropping behind. That individuality was given to you. +Individuality and society are two poles of one phenomenon. Alone you are not an +individual; the individual has to exist in a pattern of society. It is just as when I said that +alone you are neither good nor bad, alone you are neither sage nor sinner, alone you are +neither beautiful nor ugly, alone you are neither wise nor foolish. + +Both the dualities drop. The dichotomy drops. + +The individual exists in society; the individual is the unit of society. Alone you are not an +individual, so don't think that you will become an individual when alone. No, you will +not be an individual. If there is no society how can you be an individual? You will be +there, and that aloneness will be wholeness. The ego will drop, and it is the ego that gives +you the feeling of individuality. + +Alone doesn’t mean that you are an individual, alone means that now the dichotomy of +society and individual is no longer there. This will give you wholeness. You are not part +of anything now. You have become the whole. + +This is difficult to express because in language it appears absurd. You cannot imagine +how you will not be an individual if you are alone, because if you think and imagine +yourself on a hilltop, sitting alone somewhere in a Himalayan cave, you will think of +yourself as an individual — because you don't know what aloneness is. Aloneness means +that all thought, all mind, all individuality that was given by society has been left behind. +You will become just a space, an emptiness, nobody. Sitting in a Himalayan cave there +will be no one who is sitting, just a space. + +Buddha was meditating under a tree. It was a full moon night and some young people had +come to the forest. They had brought much alcohol with them and a young prostitute. + + + +But they took so much alcohol and they became so intoxicated that the prostitute +escaped. When they became aware that the girl had left them, they started to search for +her. Where did she go? + +In their search they reached Buddha who was sitting under a tree meditating. So they said +to him, "You must have seen a young, beautiful, nude girl passing by here because this is +the only way and it is a full moon night. So you must have seen a beautiful young girl, +nude, passing by. Did you see her?" + +Buddha opened his eyes and said, "Someone passed by, but I cannot say whether the one +who passed was a woman or a man. I cannot say whether the person who passed was +beautiful or ugly. And I cannot say whether the person who passed was clothed or naked. +Someone did pass — I heard the foot-steps." + +They were amazed and they said, "This is impossible!" Buddha said, "I would not have +believed this myself before. When I was a part of society it would have been impossible, +but now that I have left society I have left all the conceptions of society as well. Now +only nature happens around me. So I heard the sound of someone passing; there was just +a sound which reached into my inner space, that is all. Someone passed." + +You become a silent inner space. You are not an individual because you are not a mind. +To drop the mind solitude is suggested. And with the mind everything drops. + +A moment comes when you don’t know who you are — and that is the moment from +where real knowledge will start. + +A moment comes when you forget completely who you are, and all that you knew before +is no longer there, all the old leaves have fallen. Now this is the moment, and now there +will be an interval for a time being. This interval will be of much anguish because the old +has left and the new has not yet come. When the old leaves drop from the tree, the tree +will be naked for a few days, just waiting for the new to emerge. The new leaves are +coming, they are on the way, the old have left a place. Now that the place is vacant the +new are flowing towards the space and sooner or later they will emerge. But you will +have to wait. While meditating in aloneness, society will drop, the mind will drop, the +ego will drop and there will be a gap. You will have to pass through that gap also. Now +the tree is awaiting for the new leaves to come, but one cannot do anything. What can the +tree do? Nothing can be done to bring them sooner, they will take their own course. + +It is good that the old have dropped — because now the place is there. Space is there for +the new to emerge. Now there will be no barrier. + +So there is an autumn of the inner mind. Leaves will drop. It will be painful. You have +lived with those old leaves for so long that you will feel that you are losing something. + +And then there will be a winter of waiting, an inner winter, when you will be nude — with +no leaves, a naked tree against the sky. And you don’t know what is going to happen. + +Now everything has stopped. Now no bird comes to sing on your branches; now no one +comes to sit under you, under your shadow to wait, to relax. Now you are not in any way +aware of whether you are dead or whether a new life is going to happen to you. This is +the gap, the interval. + +Christian mystics have called it the dark night of the soul — before the sunrise. All +artificial lights have been put off. The night has become very dark. And the moment +nearest to the sunrise will be the darkest. + +So there is a winter of the inner soul when there are no leaves, and no birds sing, and no +one comes to wait under you and relax. You feel dead. Everything has stopped. All + + + +movement is gone. This has to be passed — because then there will be spring, new leaves +will come, new life, new flowers. A totally new dimension will appear within you. + +But remember the autumn, remember the winter — only then is spring possible. The +autumn is also part of the spring — if you can understand — it is making the way for the +spring to happen. So autumn is not against spring, it is just the beginning of it. And the +gap is also necessary, because in the gap you become ready. The old has left. You are not +tormented by it now, not burdened by it. + +You are pregnant — but pregnancy is waiting, the new child is growing. Before it +emerges, manifests itself in the world, it will have to hide deep in the unconscious, +because every seed has to go deep into darkness, underneath, hidden. Only then does life +happen to it. If you put the seed in the sunlight nothing will happen to it. It needs deep +darkness, a womb. So there will be winter while you are pregnant: all movement ceases, +you just have to carry the burden, consciously, understandingly, lovingly, hoping, +praying, waiting. + +And then there will be spring. It has been always so. Man is also a tree. + +And remember, aloneness is wholeness, they are not contradictory. Ego is part, ego is +fragmented, ego cannot be whole, ego is against the whole. In aloneness ego disappears. +You become one with the whole and the boundary disappears. When you are really alone +you are the cosmos, you are Brahma. + +The third question: + +Question 3 + +IN THE FIRST TECHNIQUE TAKEN LAST NIGHT IT IS SAID THAT TO ABIDE IN +LONELINESS IS TO MINIMIZE RELATIONSHIP. BUT ON PREVIOUS +OCCASIONS YOU SAID THAT ONE SHOULD MAXIMIZE THE RELATIONSHIP +WITH LIMITLESS EXPANSION. + +Do either. Either expand yourself so much that nothing remains unrelated to you, then +you will disappear; or be so totally alone that nothing remains related to you, then too +you will disappear. + + +You are in the middle, where something is related and something is not related, where +someone is a friend and someone is an enemy, where someone belongs to you and +someone doesn’t belong to you, where there is a choice. You are in the middle. Move to +either extreme. Become related to everyone, to everything that exists and you will +disappear. It is so tremendous a phenomenon to be related to everything that you cannot +exist, you will be flooded. Your ego is so narrow, it can exist with only a few +relationships — and that in those too it is against something, otherwise it could not exist. +If you are friendly to everything that is in the world, you disappear. If you want to exist +as an ego you can be friendly; but you must also be inimical to someone. You must love +someone and you must hate. Then you can exist between these two contradictions — the +ego can exist. Either love everything that is and you will disappear, or hate it and you +will disappear. They look contradictory. They are not. The technique is the same. The +technique is the same whether you love all or whether you hate all. The hatred of +everything is kn own in the East as VAIRAGYA, as renunciation. This is hatred of +everything, withdrawing your love completely, feeling that everything is useless, not +worth anything. + + + +If you can hate so totally you will become total — then you cannot exist. You can exist +only when two contradictions are there: love and hate. + +Between these two you balance. It is just like a man walking on a rope. He has to balance +between right and left. If he moves to the left completely he will fall; if he moves +completely to the right he will fall. So whether you move to the right or to the left makes +no difference. Choose one. You will fall down from the rope. + +If you want to be a man on a rope, you have to balance, sometimes to the left, sometimes +to the right. And really the balance is a science. Whenever you lean to the left you will +immediately have to lean to the right because the left will create the possibility of falling. +To counter-balance it you will have to lean to the right, and when you lean to the right +the possibility comes that you can fall. So you will have to lean to the left. That is why +you go on moving between love and hate, between friend and enemy, between this and +that, like and dislike, attraction and repulsion. You are moving on a rope, continuously. If +you don’t understand this your life will be a total misunderstanding. + +I have been studying many, many people and this is one of the basic problems of all. + +They love, then they hate, and they cannot understand why they hate when they love also. +This is how they balance — and this balancing gives you the ego, your personality. If you +really want to be without the ego, choose either extreme. Move to the left, love, and don’t +balance it by the right — you will fall from the rope. + +Or move to the right, hate, and hate totally, and don’t move to the left. You will fall from +the rope. + +Mahavir says be detached from everything — that is hate. And Krishna says love. That is +why Jains can never understand the message of Krishna. Impossible. And Hindus have +not taken any note of Mahavir. They have not even mentioned his name in their +scriptures. Not a single mention. They have not even taken note because he says be so +unattached from everything that it becomes hatred. Krishna says love, and love so deeply +that hate falls completely from the mind. Both are the same. They look contradictory to +you. They are not. + +Either you lean to the left or to the right — it makes no difference, you will fall to the +ground, you will not be on the rope. That is certain. That rope is the ego or the world, the +SANSAR, and you are balancing yourself. Many people love me but I know that sooner +or later they will balance and they will hate. And when they hate they get disturbed. They +should not get disturbed because that is how they can be on the rope. But the cannot hate +long. Again they will have to balance. + +In the morning you love, in the evening you hate, in the morning you love again. Unless +you are ready to leave the ego the balancing will continue. It can continue infinitely — +infinitely it can continue. The rope is endless. But once you get fed up with the whole +game, once you feel that this is nonsense — balancing each time with hate and love and +each time moving to the opposite direction again and again; this is nonsense — then you +can move to one, either love or hate, and drop from the rope. + +And once you drop from the rope, you are enlightened. The balance is SANSAR, the +world. + +The fourth question: + +Question 4 + +MAN HAS AN INHERENT LONGING TO ENTER INTO THE WOMB. KINDLY + + + +EXPLAIN WHETHER OR NOT MAN’S LUST FOR THE SEXUAL ACT, +PENETRATION, SYMBOLIZES HIS INHERENT LONGING FOR THIS RETURN. + + +Yes. It is part of it. Everything in nature wants to return to the source. This is one of the +laws. Whatsoever happens in-between is irrelevant, every circle comes to the end or to +the very beginning — to the original source. + +Man is bom out of the womb. Whenever he is in distress or depression, whenever there is +too much responsibility in the world, too much burden, things become heavy, he wants to +return back to the womb. Hence this attraction, lust, to enter the woman. You cannot +enter, you cannot become a child again, so the sexual act becomes a symbolic act. The +penetration becomes symbolic. You are again in the womb. That is why sex is so +relaxing, so soothing. All the tensions are gone, your mind is unburdened. In this moment +at least you are ecstatic. It is a catharsis: you are purged of much dirt. + +So sex becomes a release, a relaxation. And the woman becomes a womb. This is part of +the attraction, part of the lust. You may not be aware of it, but all that we have created for +comfort is womb-like. In a room, closed, at body temperature, silent, you can relax +easily. + +It is womb-like. And if all the qualities of the womb are there, in your sleeping room, you +will sleep deeply. Even a clock on the wall helps you. It goes on tick-tock, tick-tock. It is +the same as the heart of the mother going tick-tock, tick-tock, for the child in the womb. +He goes on listening to it. The tick-tock rhythm is helpful; the mattress, the pillows, all +the things we use are really womb-like. Now scientists are of the mind that sooner or +later we will make exactly womb-like sleeping chambers, exactly the same, because they +will give you the deepest sleep possible. + +The ultimate conception of nirvana is also womb-like. In the womb the child is so free, +free of all responsibilities. He never comes to know any desire. Before the desire is there +it is fulfilled. That is what Hindus call KALPAVRIKSHA. In heaven there are trees +under which you sit and when a desire comes to your mind, immediately it is fulfilled. +There is no gap, no time gap, between desire, demand, and supply. There is no time gap. +When the desire is there it is fulfilled. + +This is happening in the womb, it is KALPAVRIKSHA, the wish-fulfilling tree. A child +never becomes aware that he is hungry — before there is hunger, it is fulfilled. The child +never becomes aware that he is thirsty — before there is thirst, the thirst is fulfilled. He +never becomes aware of any strife, any strain; he is silently served by the cosmos around +him. + +Psychologists say that that is why the child in the womb cannot be conscious. Because +for consciousness, strife is needed, struggle is needed. Consciousness grows only when +there is demand, then a time gap, and then supply. That time gap makes you conscious. If +there is no time gap, if whatsoever you need is fulfilled immediately, you will fall asleep. +So the child is asleep for nine months together — not for a single moment does he become +alert. There is no need to be alert. All needs are fulfilled. There is no pain, no suffering, +no tension, so alertness is not possible. + +The child sleeps, and when he is born it is such a shock that Freud says that no one ever +recovers from it. It is traumatic. It remains like a wound in you. And I think he is right. +When the child is born it is a shock! He is thrown out of the Garden of Eden, out of +paradise. Everything was so beautiful — it was so beautiful that he was asleep. It was so + + + +comfortable that there was no need to be awake for even a single moment. It was a dream +land, and now he has been thrown out forcibly. There is every possibility that the +unconsciousness of the child struggles to remain in the womb. It is difficult to say +whether it is so or not, but there is every possibility that the unconsciousness of the child +struggles to remain in the womb. He creates every difficulty in coming out. Hence the +pain and the struggle. + +He is being thrown out, expelled. And the first moment out of the womb is bound to be +the greatest suffering that the child will ever suffer again. Even death will not be such a +suffering. Because in the first moment on his own he will have to breathe — and the +world has started with all its worries. Now he will be the center and he will be +responsible and he will have to carry his own burden. He is thrown out of the mother. He +will have to breathe and to cry when he is hungry. And now nothing is certain: whether +when he is hungry he will be fulfilled or not, is not certain. It will depend. He has +become dependent. Now for every need he has to struggle. But then we provide every +comfort for our children, in every way, so the shock is not so much, not too much. The +mother goes on fulfilling his needs immediately. + +Because of this the child comes to feel that he is the center of the world and the whole +world has to follow him. Just a cry and the whole world has to fall at his feet. This gives +a very egoistic beginning. So every child is very egoistic. And then other shocks are +bound to follow because this is only the first birth, just the beginning of births. Those +who know human phenomena deeply say that the whole life is a continuous birth. There +are many births. A day will come when the mother will refuse to breast-feed the child. +Now he has to depend on foods. He has to chew it. + +Responsibility grows. Now the food has to be chewed, digested. The milk was something +else. The child was not doing anything, simply sucking. He was a sucker. + +Every day responsibilities will grow and he will be thrown away, away from the mother. +And the further away he is thrown, the more the world surrounds him. The world is +hostile — the womb was never hostile, it was so friendly,. The world is not friendly: there +is competition, and everyone is interested in himself and no one is interested in you. The +world is not your mother. + +When a child moves to the school he is moving into a hostile world, with traumas and +traumas and many shocks. And it goes on. The ultimate break happens when the child +falls in love with a woman. He is becoming grown up. This is the last break with the +mother; now the last link is broken. But still this man-child will go on behaving as if his +wife is his mother. She is not. She is interested in herself, and he is interested in himself. +Both are interested in themselves. They are egos. And every husband goes on trying to +get the wife to behave like his mother. That is the struggle. She cannot behave like that — +she has her own interests. The mother was totally devoted. + +So every man is frustrated with his wife because no wife can be a mother. It is not a +question of good and bad wives — no wife can be a mother. Every man is frustrated. + +I have not yet seen a man who is not frustrated with his wife. It seems impossible not to +be frustrated because the desire is so impossible. + +But the husband feels good when he enters the woman, the wife. Again he is in the +womb. This is a symbolic penetration. In those few moments he forgets all the worries, +the world, everything. He is again a child. Look at a man deep in love with his wife, or + + + +beloved — his face will look like a child. All the tensions have gone. So it is not just +coincidence that when in love the wife will call the husband 'baby'. + +I was just reading an anecdote. It was midnight and a house was on fire. At the last +moment a woman was pulled out of it. She was mad and crying, "My baby has remained +inside." And then suddenly the baby appeared — on the balcony stood a three hundred +and sixty pound man and he said, "Don’t get worried, I am alive and I am coming." And +the whole crowd was wondering what the matter was! + +But they were deep in love, just lying together, and the man was a baby at that moment. + +In all ways mind is seeking a womb-like state again, but you cannot enter the womb, +even in a sexual act. You just seem to be. + +The only possibility of entering the womb again is not physical, it is psychological, or, on +deeper layers, spiritual. If you can be one with the cosmos you will be in the womb again, +and this is something which cannot be taken away from you. + +Then the whole existence becomes a mother. So to me, those religions that have said that +God is not a father but a mother, are more scientific. Those who have called their God +'father' are not so scientific. Because a father is not a very essential thing. It is just +accidental. 'Father' has not always existed. The word 'mother' is very very much older +than 'father'. Even the word 'uncle' is older than 'father'. Because five thousand years +back there was no marriage — groups lived together. The child knew his mother but he +didn't kn ow who the father was, so all the male members of the group were uncles. + +'Uncle' is an older word than 'father.' All the males were uncles because there was no +certainty who the father was. + +Father is a later arrival. When one male dominated a woman and pushed away all the +other males, father came into being. And it is not certain whether it is going to remain, +because the family is dispersing. It is not something eternal, just institutional. The father +seems to be going; in the future he cannot say. For father there is no hope! He will drop. +Uncles will again become important. Mother is basic; father is social and can be +discarded. It depends on the institution, on the way society thi nk s. But mother cannot be +discarded. So those religions that think of God as the Mother are really deeper — when +you enter God the mother, and become one with it, you have entered the eternal womb. + +Now there will be no pain, there will be no suffering. Now you will never be thrown out. +The last question: + +Question 5 + +YOU SAID WE ARE CONCERNED WITH THREADS, NOT THE ESSENCE. BUT +WHOM DO YOU MEAN BY 'WE ARE’? BECAUSE AS WE ARE WE ARE +CONCERNED WITH BEADS, WITH EVENTS. WE LIVE IN EVENTS. + +When I say that we are concerned with the thread, with the essence, the foundational, the +real, by 'we' I don't mean you. You as you are, no. But you as you can be, yes. You are +double, and that which you are right now is not the real. It is just a false thing, just an +image which can be discarded easily. The real you is that which can be known only when +all the masks are thrown away. So when I say 'we' are concerned with the thread, I +include you in your reality — not as egos, but as souls. You are two: one as you appear to +be and one as you are. The appearance is concerned with events, concerned with beads, +the superficial. The inner, the one that you are, is not concerned with events: it is not +concerned with time at all. It is concerned with the eternal. + + + +I will tell you a story of one of Buddha’s past lives, when he was not yet a Buddha; in that +life Buddha was as ignorant as anyone. He heard about a man who had become +enlightened. So he went to touch his feet and to have a DARSHAN. He touched the feet +of the enlightened one, and when he was rising, he was amazed to see the enlightened +man touching his feet. + +He said, "What are you doing? I am ignorant, unenlightened, a sinner, and you are +enlightened, the purest light I have ever seen. Why should you touch my feet? I have +come to touch your feet. Why should you touch my feet?" + +The enlightened one laughed and said, "I am not touching your feet. I am touching the +feet of the essential, of the soul that is hidden within you. That is already enlightened. + +You may know it, later on, and when you know, remember. One day you will come to +know the reality before which I have bowed down. You don't know it right now, your +own treasure you don’t know, but I know my treasure and the moment I have known my +treasure, I have known everybody else's treasure." + +The enlightened one said to Buddha, "The moment I became enlightened I knew the +essential reality of all. You can go on deluding yourself, that is up to you, but I can +penetrate and I can see the purest light within you. Remember me when you realize it." +And when Buddha became enlightened in his next life, he said to his disciples, "I didn’t +understand what that awakened one was saying. It was a mystery. But now I can see what +he meant. Now the appearance has come. And whatsoever I am now I was at the moment +also. He must have bowed to this." + +So when I say 'we', I include you in your possibility, not in your appearance. Your +appearance is just a dream. But you are not aware of it because if you become aware that +you are dreaming, the dream has ceased. + +You are not aware of the real you. If you become aware, the appearance will disappear. + +I am aware. So you can understand my difficulty — I see you as enlightened ones. You +are already that. You are just playing the game of being ignorant, just trying to deceive +yourself, but whatsoever you do makes no difference to the innermost reality. It remains +innocent, pure, absolutely pure. You are here. If I look at your surface, you have to be +taught many things. But if I look to your inner, there is no need to teach you anything, +there is no need to do anything. That is what I mean when I say, "We are concerned with +the thread, the essence, not with the beads, the events, the outer." + +Remember this. Some day when you become enlightened you will kn ow what my +meaning was when I said 'we', and who was included. It is certain that you are not +included as you are here, just before me, the appearance, no — but as you have always +been and as you will always be when this curtain is thrown away, when these clouds +disappear and the sun rises. I can see the sun behind the clouds. + +You are so identified with the clouds that you cannot even believe me. If I say you are +already enlightened, how can you believe it? You will say I must be deceiving you or +playing a trick. This is the truth, but truth is difficult to understand. And you have to +travel long before you come to yourselves, you have to travel long before you come to +realize that your home is the goal, that you have been always in the place that you wanted +to reach. + + + +THE END. + + + +Chapter 71: Forget the periphery + + +IN ANY POSITION GRADUALLY PERVADE AN AREA BETWEEN THE +ARMPITS INTO GREAT PEACE. + +FEEL YOURSELF AS PERVADING ALL DIRECTIONS, FAR, NEAR. + +Life without is a cyclone — a constant conflict, turmoil, struggle. But it is only so on the +surface — just as on the surface of the ocean are waves, maddening noise, constant +struggle. But this is not all of life. Deep down there is also a center — soundless, silent, no +conflict, no struggle. In the center, life is a noiseless flow, relaxed, a river moving with +no struggle, with no fight, no violence Towards that inner center is the search. You can +get identified with the surface, with the outer. Then anxiety and anguish follows. This is +what has happened to everyone: we are identified with the surface and with the struggle +that goes on there. + +The surface is bound to be disturbed, nothing is wrong in it. And if you can be rooted in +the center, the disturbance on the surface will become beautiful it will have a beauty of +its own. If you can be silent within, then all the sounds without become musical. Then +nothing is wrong; it becomes a play. But if you don't know the inner core, the silent +center, if you are totally identified with the surface, you will go mad. And everyone is +almost mad. + +All religious techniques, techniques of yoga, meditation, Zen, are basically to help you to +be again in contact with the center; to move within; to forget the periphery; to leave the +periphery for a time being and to relax into your own being so deeply that the outer +disappears completely and only the inner remains. + +Once you know how to move backwards, how to step down into yourself, it is not +difficult. It becomes as easy as anything. But if you don’t know, if you know only the +mind clinging to the surface, it is very difficult. Relaxing into one's self is not difficult: +non-clinging to the surface is. + +I have heard a Sufi story. Once it happened that a Sufi fakir was traveling. It was a dark +night and he lost his way. It was so dark he couldn’t even see where he was moving — +then suddenly he fell into an abyss. He was terrified. He didn’t know what was down +there in the darkness or how deep the abyss was. So he caught hold of a branch and +started praying. The night was cold. He cried but there was no one to listen, only his own +voice echoed back. And the night was so cold that his hands were becoming frozen and +he knew that sooner or later he would have to leave the branch — it was going to be +difficult to keep on holding it. His hands were getting so frozen that they were already +slipping from the branch. Death was absolutely near. Any moment he would fall and die. +And then the last moment came. You can understand how terrified he was. Dying +moment by moment, then the last moment came and he saw the branch slipping out of his +hand. And his hands were so frozen that there was no way to hold on, so he had to fall. +But the moment he fell he started dancing — there was no abyss, he was on clear ground. + +And he had suffered all night.... + +This is the situation. You go on clinging to the surface, afraid that if you leave the surface +you will be lost. Really, clinging to the surface you are lost. But deep down there is +darkness and you cannot see any ground; you cannot see anything else than the surface. + + + +All these techniques are to make you courageous, strong, adventurous, so that you can +stop the holding on and fall within yourself. That which looks like an abyss, dark, +bottomless, is the very ground of your being. Once you leave the surface, the periphery, +you will be centered. + +This centering is the aim. Once you are centered you can move to the periphery but you +will be totally different. The quality of your consciousness will have changed altogether. +Then you can move to the periphery but you will never be the periphery again — you will +remain at the center. And remaining centered at the periphery is beautiful. Then you can +enjoy it; it will become a beautiful play. Then there is no conflict; it is a game. Then it +will not create tensions within you and there will be no anguish and no anxiety around +you. And any moment that it becomes too much, too heavy on you, you can go back to +the original source — you can have a dip. Then you will be refreshed, rejuvenated, and +you can move to the periphery again. Once you know the way.... And the way is not long. +You are not going anywhere else than into your own self, so it is not long. + +It is just near. The only barrier is your holding on, holding to the periphery, afraid that if +you leave it you will be lost. The fear feels just as if you are going to die. Moving to the +inner center is a death — death in the sense that your identity with the periphery will die, +and a new image, a new feeling of your being will arise. + +So if we want to say in a few words what Tantra techniques are, we can say that they are +a deep relaxation into oneself, a total relaxation into oneself. + +You are always tense, that is the holding, the clinging. You are never relaxed, never in a +state of let-go. You are always doing something: that doing is the problem. You are never +in a state of non-doing, when things are happening and you are just there not doing +anything. Breath comes in and goes out, the blood circulates, the body is alive and +throbbing, the breeze blows, the world goes on spinning around — and you are not doing +anything. You are not a doer. You are simply relaxed and things are happening. When +things are happening and you are not a doer, you are totally relaxed. When you are a doer +and things are not happening but are being manipulated by you, you are tense. + +You relax partially while you are asleep, but it is not total. Even in your sleep you go on +manipulating, even in your sleep you don’t allow everything to happen. Watch a man +sleeping: you will see that he is very tense, his whole body will be tense. + +Watch a small child sleeping, he is very relaxed. Or watch an animal, a cat — a cat is +always relaxed. You are not relaxed even while asleep; you are tense, struggling, moving, +fighting with something. On your face there are tensions. In dreams you may be fighting, +protecting — doing the same things as when you were awake, repeating them in an inner +drama. You are not relaxed; you are not in a deep let-go. That's why sleep is becoming +more and more difficult. And psychologists say that if the same trend goes on, soon the +day will come when no one will be able to sleep naturally. Sleep will have to be +chemically produced because no one will be able to fall naturally into sleep. The day is +not very far. You are already on the way towards it because even while asleep you are +only partially asleep, partially relaxed. + +Meditation is the deepest sleep. It is total relaxation plus something more; you are totally +relaxed and yet alert. Awareness is there. Total sleep with awareness is meditation. Fully +alert, things are happening but you are not resisting, not fighting, not doing. The doer is +not there. The doer has gone into sleep. Only a witness is there a 'non-doer alertness' is +there. Then nothing can disturb you. + + + +If you know how to relax then nothing can disturb you. If you don’t know how to relax +then everything will disturb you. I say everything. It is not really something else that +disturbs you, everything else is just an excuse. + +You are almost always ready to be disturbed. If one thing doesn't disturb you, then +something else will; you will get disturbed. You are ready, you have a tendency to get +disturbed. If all the causes are withdrawn from you even then you will get disturbed. You +will find some cause, you will create some cause. If nothing comes from without, you +will create something from within — some thought, some idea — and you will get +disturbed. You need excuses. Once you know how to relax nothing can disturb you. Not +that the world will change, not that things will be different. The world will be the same. +But you don’t have the tendency, you don’t have the madness; you are not constantly +ready to be disturbed. Then all that happens around you is soothing — even the traffic +noise becomes soothing if you are relaxed. Even the market-place becomes soothing. It +depends on you. It is an inner quality. The more you go towards the center the more the +quality arises and the more you move towards the periphery the more you will be +disturbed. If you are too disturbed or if you are prone to be disturbed that shows only one +thing: that you are existing near the periphery — nothing else. It is an indication that you +have made your abode near the surface. And this is a false abode because your real home +is at the center, the very center of your being. + +Now we will enter the techniques. + +IN ANY EASY POSITION GRADUALLY PERVADE AN AREA BETWEEN THE +ARMPITS INTO GREAT PEACE. + + +This is a very simple method but it works miraculously — try it. And anyone can try it, +there is no danger. The first thing is to be in an easy relaxed position — relaxed in a +position that is easy for you. Don’t try a particular position or ASANA. Buddha sits in a +particular posture. It is easy for him. It also can become easy for you if you practise it for +a time being, but in the very beginning it will not be easy for you. And there is no need to +practise it: start from any posture that comes easy to you right now. Don’t struggle with +the posture. You can sit in an easy chair and relax. The only thing is your body must be +in a relaxed state. + +So just close your eyes and feel all over the body. Start from the legs — feel whether there +is some tension or not. If you feel there is some tension, do one thing: make it more tense. +If you feel there is some tension in the right leg, then make that tension as intense as +possible. Bring it to a peak — then suddenly relax so that you can feel how the relaxation +settles there. Then go all over the body just looking everywhere for some tension. +Wherever you feel the tension make it more so, because it is easy to relax when it is +intense. In just a mid-state it is very difficult because you cannot feel it. It is easy to move +from one extreme to another, very easy, because the very extreme creates the situation to +move to the other. + +So if you feel some tensions in the face then strain all the face muscles as much as +possible, create tension and bring it to a peak. Bring it to a point where you feel that no +more is possible — then suddenly relax. In this way see that all parts of the body, all the +limbs are relaxed. + +And be particular about the face muscles, because they carry ninety per cent of the + + + +tensions — the rest of the body carries only ten per cent. All your tensions are in the mind +so the face becomes the storage. So strain your face as much as possible, don't be shy +about it. Make it intensely anguished, anxious — and then suddenly relax. Do it for five +minutes so that you can feel that every limb in the whole body is relaxed. This is an easy +posture for you. + +You can do it sitting, or lying in bed or howsoever you feel is easy for you. IN ANY +EASY POSITION GRADUALLY PERVADE AN AREA BETWEEN THE ARMPITS +INTO GREAT PEACE. + +The second thing: when you feel that the body has got to an easy posture, don't make +much fuss about it. Just feel that the body is relaxed, then forget the body. Because really, +remembering the body is a sort of tension. That’s why I say don't make much fuss about +it. Relax it and forget it. Forgetting is relaxation. Whenever you remember too much, that +very remembering brings a tension to the body. + +You may not have observed this, but there is a very easy experiment to try. + +Put your hand on your pulse and count it. Then close your eyes, bring your attention to +your pulse for five minutes, and then count. The pulse will now be beating faster because +the attention for five minutes gives tension to it. So really, whenever a doctor counts your +pulse it is never the real count — it is always more than it was before the doctor started +counting it. Whenever the doctor has taken your hand in his hand you have become alert. +And if the doctor is a lady doctor you will be more alert, and it will go faster. So +whenever a lady doctor counts your pulse reduce it by ten. Then that will be exactly your +pulse count — otherwise there will be ten more counts per minute. + +Whenever you bring your consciousness to any part of the body, that part becomes tense. +You become tense when someone observes you; the whole body becomes tense. When +you are alone you are different. When someone enters the room you are not the same. + +The whole body is going at a faster rate. You have become tense. So don’t make much +fuss about relaxation or you will be obsessed with it. For five minutes simply relax easily +and forget. Your forgetting will be helpful and it will bring a deeper relaxation to the +body. + +.... GRADUALLY PERVADE AN AREA BETWEEN THE ARMPITS INTO GREAT +PEACE. Close your eyes and just feel the area between the two armpits: the heart area, +your chest. First feel it just between the two armpits with your total attention, total +awareness. + +Forget the whole body, remember just the heart area between the two armpits, the chest, +and feel it filled with great peace. The moment the body is relaxed, peace automatically +happens in your heart. The heart becomes silent, relaxed, harmonious. And when you +forget the whole body and bring your attention just to the chest and consciously feel it +filled with peace, much peace will happen immediately. + +There are areas in the body, particular centers, where particular feelings can be created +consciously. Between the two annpits is the heart center, and the heart center is the +source of all the peace that happens to you, whenever it happens. Whenever you are +peaceful, the peace is coming from the heart. The heart radiates peace. That is why +people all over the world, every race, without any distinction of cat, religion, country, +cultured or uncultured, have felt this: that love arises from somewhere near the heart. No +scientific explanation exists. Whenever you think of love you think of the heart. Really, +whenever you are in love you are relaxed, and because you are relaxed you are filled with + + + +a certain peace. That peace arises from the heart. So peace and love have become joined, +associated. Whenever you are in love you are peaceful; whenever you are not in love you +are disturbed. Because of peace the heart has become associated with love. + +So you can do two things. + +You can search for love, then sometimes you will feel peace. But this path is dangerous, +because the other person whom you love has become more important than you. And the +other is the other, and you are becoming in a way dependent. So love will give you peace +sometimes but not always. There will be many disturbances, many moments of anguish +and anxiety, because the other has entered. Whenever another enters there is bound to be +some disturbance, because you can meet with the other only on your surface. The surface +will be disturbed. Only sometimes when the two of you will be so deeply in love with no +conflict, only then will you sometimes be relaxed and the heart will glow with peace. + +So love can only give you glimpses of peace but nothing really established, rooted. No +eternal peace is possible through it, only glimpses. And between two glimpses there will +be deep valleys of conflict, violence, hatred and anger. + +The other way is to find peace not through love, but directly. If you can find peace +directly — and this is the method for it — your life will become filled with love. But now +the quality of love will be different. It will not be possessive; it will not be centered +around one. It will not be dependent and it will not make any one dependent on you. + +Your love will become just a lovingness, a compassion, a deep empathy. And now no +one, not even a lover, can disturb you, because your peace is already rooted and your +love comes as a shadow of your inner peace. + +The whole thing has become reversed. So Buddha is also loving but his love is not an +anguish. If you love you will suffer, if you don’t love you will suffer. If you don't love +you will suffer the absence of love; if you love you will suffer the presence of love. +Because you are on the surface and whatsoever you do can only give you momentary +satisfaction — then again the dark valley. + +First be established in peace on your own, then you are independent, then love is not your +need. Then you will never feel imprisoned when you are in love; you will never feel that +love has become a sort of dependence, a slavery, a bondage. Then love will be just a +giving: you have too much peace so you want to share it. Then it will be just a giving +with no idea of return; it will be unconditional. And it is one of the secrets that the more +you give, the more it happens to you. The more you give and share, the more it becomes +your own. The deeper you enter into the treasury, which is infinite, the more you can go +on giving to everybody. It is inexhaustible. + +But love must happen to you as a shadow of inner peace. Ordinarily the reverse is the +phenomenon: peace happens to you just as a shadow of love. Love must happen to you as +a shadow of peace, then love is beautiful. Otherwise love also creates ugliness, it +becomes a disease, a fever. + +.... PERVADE AN AREA BETWEEN THE ARMPITS INTO GREAT PEACE. + + +Become aware of the area between the annpits and feel that it is filled with great peace. +Just feel peace there and you will feel it is filled. It is always filled but you have never +been alert about it. This is only to increase your alertness, to bring you nearer home. And +when you feel this peace you are farther away from the surface. Not that things will not + + + +be happening there — but when you try this experiment and when you are filled with +peace you will feel a distance; the noise is coming from the street but there is a great +distance now, a great space. It happens, but it brings no disturbance; rather, it brings you +a deeper silence. This is the miracle. The children will be playing, someone will be +listening to the radio, someone will be quarrelling and the whole world will be going +around, but you feel that a great distance has come between you and everything. That +distance comes because you have retreated from the periphery. Things are happening on +the periphery and they will appear to you as if they are happening to someone else. You +are not involved. Nothing disturbs you so you are not involved — you have transcended. +This is the transcendence. + +And the heart is naturally the source of peace. You are not creating anything. You are +simply coming to a source which is always there. This imagining will help you become +aware that the heart is filled with peace — it is not that the imagining will create the +peace. + +This is the difference between the Tantra attitude and Western hypnosis. Hypnotists think +that you are creating it by imagination but Tantra thinks that you are not creating it by +imagination, you are simply becoming attuned to something that is already there. + +Because whatsoever you can create by imagination cannot be permanent: if it is not a +reality then it is false, unreal, and you are creating a hallucination. So it is better to be +disturbed and real than to be in a hallucination of peace, because that is not a growth, you +are simply intoxicated by it. Sooner or later you will have to come out because sooner or +later the reality will shatter the illusion. Reality has to shatter all illusions; only a greater +reality cannot be shattered. + +A greater reality will shatter the reality which is on the periphery, hence Shankara and +others say that the world is illusion. Not that the world is illusion, but they have come to +know a higher reality and from that altitude this world looks dreamy. It is so far away, +the distance is so infinite that it cannot be felt as real. The noise on the street will be as if +you are dreaming about it — it is not real. It cannot do anything. It just happens and +passes and you remain untouched. And when you are untouched by reality how can you +feel that it is real? The reality is felt only when it penetrates you deeply. The deeper the +penetration, the more you feel it as real. + + +Shankara says the whole world is unreal. He must have come to a point from where the +distance is so vast, so tremendously vast, that all that happens there becomes just like a +dream. It comes but no reality comes with it because it cannot penetrate. Penetration is +the proportion of reality. If I throw a stone at you it hits you. The hit penetrates you and +that penetration makes the stone real. If I throw a stone and it touches you but doesn't +penetrate you, deep down you will hear the thud of the falling stone on you, but there will +be no disturbance. You will feel it as false, unreal, MAYA, illusory. But you are so near +the periphery that if I throw a stone at you, you will be hurt. Not the body — the body will +be hurt in either case. If I throw a stone at a Buddha the body will be hurt as your body +will be hurt, but Buddha is not on the periphery, he is rooted in the center. And the +distance is so great that he will hear the thud of the stone without being hurt. The being +will remain untouched, unscarred. This unscarred being will feel the stone as if it is +something thrown in a dream. It is illusory. So Buddha says that nothing has substance to +it, everything is 'substanceless', without any substance. The world is empty of substance + + + +— which is the same thing as Shankara saying that the world is illusory. + +Try this. Whenever you are able to feel the peace between your two armpits filling you, +pervading your heart center, the world will look illusory. + +This is a sign that you have entered meditation — when the world feels and appears to be +illusory. Don't think that the world is illusory, there is no need to think it — you will feel +it. It will suddenly occur to your mind, "What has happened to the world?" The world has +suddenly gone dreamy. It is there, a dreamlike existence, without any substance. It looks +so real, just like a film on the screen. It can even be three dimensional. It looks like +something, but it is a projected thing. Not that the world is a projected thing, not that it is +really unreal — no. The world is real but you create the distance, and the distance gets +more and more. And you can understand whether the distance is getting more and more +or not by knowing how you are feeling about the world. That's the criterion. That is a +meditative criterion. It is not a truth that the world is unreal — if the world has become +unreal, you have become centered in the being. Now the surface and you are so far away +that you can look at the surface as being something objective, something other than you. +You are not identified. + +This technique is very easy and will not take much time if you try it. With this technique +it sometimes even happens that with the very first effort you will feel the beauty and the +miracle of it. So try it. But if you don't feel anything with the first effort, don't be +disappointed. Wait. + +And go on doing it. And it is so easy that you can go on doing it any time. Just lying on +your bed at night you can do it; just in the morning when you feel that you are now +awake you can do it. Do first and then get up. Even ten minutes will be enough. Ten +minutes at night just before falling asleep, do it. Make the world unreal, and your sleep +will be so deep that you may not have slept like that before. If the world becomes unreal +just before falling asleep, dreaming will be less. Because if the world has become a +dream then dreams cannot continue. And if the world is unreal, you are totally relaxed +because the reality of the world will not impinge itself upon you, hammer on you. + +I have suggested this technique to people who suffer from insomnia. It helps deeply. If +the world is unreal, tensions dissolve. And if you can move from the periphery, you have +already moved to a deep state of sleep — before the sleep comes you are already deep into +it. And then in the morning it is beautiful because you are so fresh, so young; your whole +energy is vibrating. It is because you are coming back to the periphery from the center. +And the moment you become alert that now sleep is no more, don’t open your eyes. First +do this experiment for ten minutes, then open the eyes. The body is relaxed after the +whole night and is feeling fresh and alive. You are already relaxed; so it will not take +much time. + +Just relax. Bring your consciousness to the heart just between the two armpits: feel it +filled with deep peace. For ten minutes remain in that peace, then open the eyes. The +world will look totally different because that peace will also be radiated from your eyes. +And the whole day you will feel different — not only will you feel different but you will +feel that people are behaving differently with you. To every relationship you contribute +something. If your contribution is not there, people behave differently because they feel +you are a different person. They may not be aware of it. But when you are filled with +peace everyone will behave differently towards you. They will be more loving and more + + + +kind, less resistant, more open, closer. A magnet is there. Peace is the magnet. When you +are peaceful people come nearer to you; when you are disturbed everyone is repelled. + +And this is so physical a phenomenon that you can observe it easily. Whenever you are +peaceful you will feel everyone wants to be closer to you because that peace radiates, it +becomes a vibration around you. Circles of peace move around you and whosoever +comes near wants to be nearer to you — like you want to move under the shadow of a tree +and to relax there. + +A person who is peaceful within has a shadow around him. Wherever he goes everyone +would like to be closer to him, open, trusting. A person who has inner turmoil, conflict, +anguish, anxiety, tensions, repels persons. + +Whosoever come near becomes afraid. You are dangerous. To be near you is dangerous. +Because you will give whatsoever you have, you are constantly giving it. So you may +want to love someone but if you are very disturbed within, even your lover will be +repelled and he will want to escape from you because you will drain his energy and he +will not feel happy with you. And whenever you leave him, you will leave him tired, +exhausted, because you don;t have a life-giving source, you have a destructive energy +within you. + +So not only will you feel you are different, others will also feel that you are different. +Your whole life-style can change if you move a little closer to the center — and the whole +outlook and the whole outcome. If you are peaceful the whole world becomes peaceful to +you. It is just a reflection. Whatsoever you are is reflected all over. Everyone becomes a +mirror. + +The second technique: + +FEEL YOURSELF AS PERVADING ALL DIRECTIONS, FAR, NEAR. + +Tantra and yoga both think that your narrowness is the problem. Because you have made +yourself so narrow, so tightly narrow, you feel always in bondage. The bondage is not +coming from anywhere else: the bondage is coming from your narrow mind. And it goes +on being narrower and narrower and you are very confined. That confinement gives you +the feeling of bondage. You have an infinite soul and an infinite being but that infinite +being feels imprisoned. + +So whatsoever you do, you feel limitations everywhere. Wherever you move, a point of +cul de sac comes. You cannot move beyond it. Everywhere there is a boundary. There is +no open sky to fly. But that boundary is created by you — that boundary is your own +creation. You have created it for certain reasons: for security, safety. You have created a +boundary. And the narrower the boundary, the more you feel secure. If you have a very +large boundary you cannot watch over all of it, you cannot be alert and watchful +everywhere. It becomes vulnerable. Narrow the boundary and you can watch it, you can +remain closed, you are not vulnerable, you feel safe. The safety, the security has created +the boundary. But then you feel a bondage. + +This is how the mind is paradoxical. You go on asking for more safety and you go on +asking for more freedom. Both cannot be together. If you want freedom you will have to +lose safety, security — in any case the safety is just illusory, it is not really there. Because +death is going to happen — whatsoever you do, you are going to die. All your safety, +security, is just a facade, nothing will help. But afraid of insecurity you create +boundaries, you create big walls around you and then the open sky is closed. And then +you suffer! And then you say, "Where is the open sky?" and "I want freedom and I want + + + +to move!" But you have created these boundaries. + + +So this is the first thing to remember before you do this technique otherwise it will not be +possible to do it. With your boundaries intact you cannot do it. Unless you stop creating +boundaries you will not be able to feel or do it. + +.... PERVADING ALL DIRECTIONS, FAR, NEAR. No boundaries, becoming infinite, +becoming one with infinite space.... This will be impossible with your mind. How can +you feel it? How can you do it? First you will have to stop doing certain things. + +The first thing is that if you are too concerned about security and safety then remain in +bondage. Really, prison is the most secure place. No one can harm you there. No one out +of prison is as secure, as guarded, as the prisoners. You cannot kill, you cannot murder a +prisoner. It is difficult. He is more guarded than a king. You can murder a president or a +king, it is not so difficult. Every day they go on killing them. But you cannot kill a +prisoner. He is so safe that those who want to be safe, really, must be in prisons, they +must not live outside. To live out of a prison is dangerous, it is full of hazards. Anything +can happen. So we have created mental prisons around us, psychological prisons around +us, and we carry those prisons with us, they are portable. You need not remain with them, +they move with you. Wherever you go, your prison goes with you. + +You are always behind a wall. + +Only sometimes, rarely, do you stretch your hand out of it to touch someone. But only a +hand — you never come out of your prison. So whenever we meet, it is simply meeting +hands out of prisons. Out of windows we stretch a hand, afraid, scared, and ready any +moment to withdraw the hand. Both the parties are doing the same — only hands touch. +And now psychologists say that even that is just an appearance, because hands have their +own armor around them. No hand is ungloved. Not only Queen Elizabeth uses gloves, +you also have gloves so that no one can touch you. Or even if someone touches, there is +only a hand, dead. You are already withdrawn, afraid. Because the other creates fear. As +Sartre says, "The other is the enemy." The other will look like an enemy if you are so +annored. With an armored person there can be no friendship. Friendship is impossible, +love is impossible, communion is impossible. You are afraid. Someone may make you a +possession, someone may overpower you, someone may make you a slave... afraid of +this, you have created a prison, a safety wall around you. Cautiously you move, +cautiously you take every step. Life becomes a drudgery, life becomes a boredom. If you +are too cautious, life cannot be an adventure. If you are protecting yourself too much, +hankering after security too much, you are already dead. + +So remember one basic law: life is insecurity. And if you are ready to live in insecurity, +only then will you be alive. + +Insecurity is freedom. If you are ready to be insecure, constantly insecure, you will be +free. And freedom is the door to the Divine. + +Afraid, you create a prison — you become dead, more and more dead. And then you call, +"Where is God?" And then you question, "Where is life? What does life mean? Where is +bliss?" Life is there waiting for you, but you have to meet it on its own terms. You cannot +have your own terms, life has its own terms. And the basic tenn is: remain insecure. +Nothing can be done about it. You can only create an illusion and in that illusion you can +waste your life. Nothing can be done about it. Whatsoever you do is just a deception. + + + +If you fall in love you become afraid that this woman can leave you or this man can leave +you. Fear enters immediately. You were never afraid when you were not in love. Now +you are in love: life has entered and insecurity has entered with it. One who never loves +anybody is never afraid that anyone will leave him. The whole world can leave him, he is +not afraid. You cannot hann him. He is secure. The moment you love someone, +insecurity has entered because life has entered. And with life, death has entered. The +moment you love you have become afraid: this person can die, this person can leave, this +person can love somebody else! Now to make things secure, you must do something — +you must get married. So a legal bondage is made so that it is now difficult for this +person to leave you. + +\Now society will protect you, the law will protect you, the policeman, the judge, will all +protect you. Now if this person wants to leave, you can drag him to the court, and if he +wants a divorce he will have to prove something against you. Even then it will take three +or five years. Now you have created safety around you. But the moment you are married +you are dead. The relationship is not alive. Now it has become a law, not a relationship. +Now it is a legal phenomenon, not an alive thing. The court cannot protect life; the law +can only protect laws. Now marriage is something which is dead. It can be defined. Love +cannot be defined. Marriage is definable, love is indefinable. Now you have come under +the world of definitions. + +But the phenomenon is already dead. The moment you wanted it to be secure, the +moment you wanted to enclose it so that no new thing happens to it, you are imprisoned +in it. Then you will suffer. Then you will say that this wife has become a bondage to you. +The husband will say this wife has become a bondage to him. And then you fight because +you have each become an imprisonment for the other. Now you fight. Now love has +disappeared, there is only conflict. That is what happens because of the hankering for +security. + +And this has happened in everything. Remember it as something basic: life is insecure. +This is the very nature of it. So when there is love, suffer the fear that the beloved can +leave you, but don;t create security. + +Then love will grow. The beloved can die and you cannot do anything, but that will not +kill love. Security can kill. Love will grow more. + +Really, if man were immortal, I say love would be impossible. If man were immortal it +would be difficult to love anybody. It would be so dangerous to fall in love. Death is +there and life is just like a dew drop on a trembling leaf. Any moment the breeze will +come and the dew drop will fall and disappear. Life is just a wavering. Because of that +wavering, because of that movement, death is always there. It gives intensity to love. +Love is possible only because there is death. Love becomes intense because there is +death. Think... if you know your beloved is going to die the next moment, all meanness +will go, all conflict will go. And this one moment will become eternity. And there will be +so much love that your whole being will be poured into it. But if you know the beloved is +going to live, there is no hurry. You can fight and you can postpone the loving for later +on. If life is eternal, if the body is immortal, you cannot love. + +Hindus have a beautiful myth. They say in heaven where Indra rules — Indra is the king +of heaven — there is no love. There are beautiful girls, more beautiful than on the earth, +and deities. They have sex but there is no love because they are immortal. + +So it is recorded in one of the Indian stories that Urvashi, the chief of the heavenly girls, + + + +asked permission of Indra to move to earth for a few days to love a man. + +"What nonsense!: Indra said. "You can love here! And you will not find such beautiful +persons on the earth." Urvashi said, "They are beautiful but they are immortal, so there is +no chann. They are really dead." + +They are really dead because there is no death to make them alive. They will always be +there. They cannot die, so how can they be alive? That aliveness exists against death. A +man is alive because death is there constantly, fighting. Against the background of death +life exists. + +So Urvashi said, "Give me permission to move to the earth. I want to love someone." +Pennission was given so she came down to earth and fell in love with Pururuwa, a young +man. + +But there was a condition from Indra. Indra made the condition that she could go to the +earth, she could love someone, but she must tell the man who loved her not to ask +anything about who she was. This is difficult for love because love is curious. Love +wants to know everything about the beloved, everything. The whole unknown has to be +made known. The whole mystery has to be entered and penetrated. So Indra cunningly +made a condition which Urvashi didn’t understand the craftiness of. So she said, "Okay. I +will tell my lover not to be curious about me, not to ask who I am. And if he asks, +immediately I will leave him, I will come back." And she said to Pururuwa, "Don’t ever +ask anything about me, who I am. The moment you ask I will have to leave earth." + +But love is curious. Because of this Pururuwa must have become more curious about who +she was. He could not sleep. He would go on looking at Urvashi. Who is she? Such a +beautiful woman, made of dreamy stuff, doesn’t look earthly, doesn’t look substantial. +Perhaps she comes from somewhere else, some unknown dimension. He became more +and more curious. But he also became more and more afraid, because she might leave. He +became so afraid that in the night when he went to sleep he would take a fragment of her +saree in his hand because he was not confident about himself. Any moment he could ask, +the question was always there. Even in his sleep he could ask. And Urvashi said that even +in sleep he could not ask about her. So he slept with a part of her saree in his hand. + +But one night he couldn’t contain himself — and he thought that now she loved him so +much that she would not leave. So he asked. And Urvashi had to disappear — only a +fragment of her saree remained in Pururuwa's hand. And it is said that he is still searching +for her. + +In heaven there cannot be love because there is no life really. Life exists here on earth, +where death exists. Whenever you make anything secure, life disappears. Remain +insecure, that is the very quality of life itself. Nothing can be done about it. And it is +beautiful! + +Just think if your body was immortal — it would be ugly. + +You will start finding ways and means of committing suicide. And if it is impossible, +against the law, you will suffer so much you cannot even imagine. Immortality is a very +long thing. Now in the West they go on thinking about euthanasia because people are +now living longer. So a person who reaches the age of a hundred wants the right to kill +himself. And really, the right will have to be given. We made it a law not to commit +suicide when life was very short. Really in Buddha's age to be forty or fifty was much. +The average life was just about twenty. In India, just two decades ago the average life +was twenty-three. Now in Sweden the average life is eighty-three. So people can very + + + +easily live to be a hundred and fifty. In Soviet Russia there are fifteen hundred people +who have reached the mark of a hundred and fifty. Now if they say they have the right to +kill themselves, because now it is too much, we will have to give them the right. It cannot +be denied them. Sooner or later suicide will be one of the birth rights. You cannot deny it +if a person wants to die — not for any reason, just because now life has no meaning. It has +been too long already. A person living at a hundred doesn't feel like living. Not that he is +frustrated, not that there is no food. Everything is there, but life has no meaning. + +So think of immortality. Life will be totally meaningless. The meaning comes with death. + +Love has meaning because love can be lost. Then it throbs, vibrates, pulsates. It can be +lost! You cannot be certain about it! You cannot think anything about it for tomorrow +because it may not be there. You have to love the lover and the beloved with the view +that tomorrow may never be there at all. Then love becomes intense. + +So first, withdraw your efforts to create a secure life. Just by withdrawing, your walls +around you will fall. Lor the first time you will feel rains coming to you directly, the +wind blowing at you directly, the sun rising to you directly. You will be under the open +sky. It is beautiful. And if it looks horrible to you it is only because you have become +accustomed to living in a prison. You will have to get accustomed to this new freedom. +This freedom will make you more alive, more flowing, more open, more rich, more +radiant. But the more radiant you are, the higher the peak of your aliveness, the deeper +will be the death near you. Just near. You can rise only against death, the valley of death. +The peak of life and the valley of death are always near and in proportion. + +That's why I always say that Nietzsche's dictum is to be followed. It is a very religious +dictum. Nietzsche says, "Live dangerously." Not that you have to seek danger positively, +there is no need to seek danger positively. Don’t create protections. Don't create walls +around you. + +Live naturally, and that will be dangerous, dangerous enough. There is no need to seek +any danger. + +Then you can do this technique. LEEL YOURSELL AS PERVADING ALL +DIRECTIONS, PAR, NEAR. Then it is very easy. If walls are not there, you will already +be feeling yourself pervading everywhere. Then there is no point at where you end. You +simply begin in the heart and end nowhere. You have a center and no periphery. The +periphery goes on expanding — on and on. The whole space is surrounded by it. Stars +move in it. Earths are born and dissolve. Planets arise and set. The whole cosmos +becomes your periphery. In this vastness where will your ego be? In this vastness where +will your suffering be? In this vastness where will your mean mind be? The mediocre +mind, where will it be? It cannot be there in such vastness, it simply disappears. It can +exist only in a narrow field. It can exist only when it is walled, enclosed, encapsulated. +The encapsulation is the problem. Live dangerously and be ready to live in insecurity. +And the beauty is that even if you decide not to live in insecurity, you will! You cannot +do anything! + +I have heard about a king. He was very afraid of death.... + +Kings are more afraid. They are more afraid because they have exploited so many people; +they have pushed, crushed; they have played many political games on so many people. +They have made many enemies. + + +A real king has no friend. He cannot have. Because the closest friend is also an enemy, + + + +just waiting for an opportunity to kill him, to be in his place. A man in power cannot have +any friends. A Hitler, a Stalin, a Nixon, they cannot have friends. They just have enemies +who are parading around them as friends and just waiting for the right chance to push +them aside from the throne. Whenever they get the chance they do everything. Just a +moment ago they were friendly, but their friendliness is a strategy. Their friendliness is a +tactic. A man who is in power cannot have friends. So Lao Tzu says, "If you want +friends, don’t be in power." Then the whole world will be friendly to you. If you are in +power, then you are your only friend, everyone is your enemy. + +.... So the king was very afraid. He was very scared of death, it was all around. He was +haunted by the idea that everyone around him was going to kill him. He couldn't sleep. + +So he asked his wise men, his counsellors, what to do. They told him to make a palace +with only one door. At the door he should put seven rings of military men: the first +watching the palace, the second watching the first, the third ring watching the second. +With only one door no one could enter and the king would be safe. + +The king built the palace with only one door and with seven rings of soldiers watching +each other. The news spread all over and another king from a nearby state came to see it. + +He was also afraid. News had reached him that his neighbor had built such a secure +palace that it was impossible to kill him. He came to visit his neighbor and together they +appreciated very much the idea of only one door and every safety; no danger. + +While they were looking at the door a beggar just sitting at the corner of the street started +laughing. So the king, the owner of the palace, asked the beggar, "Why are you +laughing?" The beggar replied, "I am laughing because you have made one error. You +should go inside and close, seal this door also. This door is dangerous, someone can enter +it. A door means that somebody can enter. So you do one thing: go inside and let this +door be also closed. Then you will be really safe because death cannot enter." But the +king said, "That means I would be already dead if I closed this door also." The beggar +said, "You are already ninety-nine per cent dead — you are only as much alive as this +door. That is the danger, this much alive. Leave this aliveness also." + +Everyone in his own way is creating a palace around him where nothing can enter and he +can remain in peace. But then you are already dead. And peace happens only to those +who are alive; peace is not a dead thing. Remain alive, live dangerously, live a vulnerable +life, open, so that everything can happen to you. And let everything happen to you. The +more that happens to you the richer you will be. + + +Then you can practise this technique. This technique is then very easy, you will not even +need to practise it. Just think, and you will be pervading the whole space. + + +THE END. + + + +Chapter 72: Falling in love with an enlightened person + + +The first question: + +Question 1 + +YOU SAID THAT LOVE IS POSSIBLE ONLY WITH DEATH. THEN WILL YOU +PLEASE EXPLAIN BUDDHA’S LOVE. + +For an ignorant person love is always part of hate, it always goes with hate. For the +ignorant mind hate and love are just two aspects of the same coin. For the ignorant mind +love is never pure. + +And that is the misery of love — because the hate becomes a poison. You love a person +and you hate the same person also. But you may not be doing both simultaneously so you +are not aware of it. When you love a person you forget about the hatred part, it goes +below, it goes into the unconscious and it waits there. Then when your love is tired, it +falls into the unconscious and the hate part conies up. Then you hate the same person. + +And when you hate you are not aware that you also love — now the love has gone deep +down into the unconscious. This goes on, just like night and day. It goes on moving in a +circle. It becomes a misery. + +But for a Buddha, for one who is enlightened, the dichotomy, the dualism, disappears. +Everywhere — not only as far as love is concerned — the whole life becomes a oneness. +Then there is no dichotomy, the opposite doesn’t exist. + +So really, to call Buddha’s love 'love' is not good, but we have no other tenn. Buddha +himself never used the word 'love’. He used the word 'compassion’. + +But that too is not very good. Because your compassion is always mixed with your +cruelty, your non-violence is always mixed with your violence — whatsoever you do will +have its opposite just nearby. You exist between contradictions; hence the tension, the +anguish, the anxiety. You are not one; you are always two. You are a crowd, divided into +many fragments, and those fragments are opposing each other. Your being is a tension; +Buddha's being is a deep relaxation. Remember, tension exists between two opposite +poles, and relaxation is just in the middle, where two opposing poles are no longer +opposing. They negate each other — and there is a transcendence. So Buddha's love is +basically different from what you know as love. + +Your love is a dis-ease; Buddha’s love is total relaxation. There is no head part to it, so +the quality of it changes completely. Many things will be in Buddha’s love which cannot +be in ordinary love. First, it cannot be hot. The hotness comes from hate. It is not passion, +rather it is compassion. It is not hot, it is cool. To us, a cool love means something which +has gone wrong. Buddha’s love is cool, there is no heat to it. It is not like the sun, it is like +the moon. It will not create passion in you, it will create a deep coolness. + +Secondly, Buddha's love is not really a relationship — your love is a relationship. + +Buddha’s love is his state of being. + +Really, he does not love you, he IS love. This distinction must be understood clearly. If +you love a person, your love is an act, you do something, you behave in a certain way, +you create a relationship, a bridge. Buddha's love is just his being, it is just how he is. He +is not loving towards you, he is just love. He is just like a flower there in the garden — +you pass by and the perfume comes to you. It is not that the flower is sending its perfume +to you especially — when there was no one passing by, the perfume was there. And if no + + + +one ever passes by, the perfume will still be there. + +When your lover is not with you, when your beloved is not with you, the love disappears, +the perfume is not there. It is an effort on your part, it is not simply your being. You have +to do something to bring it out. When no one is there and Buddha is sitting alone under +his Bodhi tree, then too he is a lover. It looks absurd that then too he is a lover. There is +no one to be loved but still he is a lover. This being a lover is his state. And because it is +his state, it is never a tension. Buddha cannot get tired of his love. You will get tired, +because it is something you are doing. So lovers get tired of each other if there is too +much love. They get tired, they need gaps, intervals, to recuperate. If you are with your +lover for twenty-four hours he will get fed up because it is too much attention. + +Twenty-four hours of doing something is too much. + +Buddha is not doing something, he is not tired of his love. It is his very being, it is just as +if he is breathing. As you are never tired of breathing, you are never tired of being, so he +is not tired of his love. + +And then the third thing follows: you will be aware that you love, Buddha will not be at +all aware. Because awareness needs the contrary. Buddha is so filled with love that he +will not be aware. If you ask him he will say, "I love you." But he is not aware of it. It is +flowing so silently from him, it has become so intrinsic a part, that he cannot be aware of +it. Y ou will become aware that he loves, and if you are open and receptive you will +become more aware that he loves you more. It depends on your capacity, on how much +you can receive. But to him it is not a gift. He is not giving anything to you — he is this +way, he happens to be this way. Whenever you become aware of your total being, +enlightened, liberated, the dichotomy from your life drops. Then there is no duality. Then +life becomes a harmony — nothing is against anything. + +Because of this harmony, much peace happens. There is no disturbance. Disturbance is +not created from without, it is within you. The contradiction goes on creating the +disturbance although you may find excuses without. For example, watch what happens +with your lover, or a friend, a deep friend, very intimate, close. + +Live with him, and just watch what is happening to you. When you meet you are very +elated, ecstatic, dancing. But how much can you dance? And how ecstatic can you feel? +Minutes later you are down, the elation has gone, and after a few hours you are bored, +you are thinking of escaping to somewhere else. And after a few days you will be +fighting. Just watch what is happening. This is all coming from within, but you will find +excuses outside. You will say that now this man is not as loving as he was when he came; +now this man is disturbing me, he is making me angry. And you will always find that he +is doing something to you, you will never be aware that your dichotomy, your duality of +mind, the opposites within, are doing something. We are never aware of our own +workings of the mind. + +I have heard that a very famous, glamorous, Hollywood actress went to a studio for her +photograph. The photograph had been taken the day before. The photographer presented +the photograph to her, but she was annoyed, furious. She said, "What have you done? + +You have taken my photographs before and they were heavenly!" The photographer said +to the actress, "Yes, but you have forgotten that I was twelve years younger when I took +your photographs. I was twelve years younger, you forget that." + +We never look within at what is happening. If the photograph is not okay to you, +something is wrong with the photographer. + + + +It is not that twelve years have passed and you are older — it is an inner process, the +photographer is not concerned at all. But the photographer must have been a very wise +man! He said, "You forget that I was twelve years younger then." + +Buddha's love is totally different, but we don’t have any other word for it. The best that +we have is 'love'. But, if you can remember this, then the quality changes completely. +And note one thing, think about it deeply. If Buddha is your lover, will you be satisfied? +You will not be. Because you will feel that it is cold, that there is no passion in it. You +will feel that he loves you as he loves everyone — you are nothing special. You will feel +that his love is not a gift — he is this way, that is why he is loving. + +You will feel his love to be so natural that you will not be satisfied with it. Think inside. +You cannot be satisfied with a love which is without hate. And you cannot be satisfied +with a love which is with hate. This is the problem. Either way you will be unsatisfied. If +love is with hate, you will be unsatisfied, always ill, because the hate part will disturb +you. If love is without hate, you will feel that it is cold. And it is happening to Buddha so +naturally that even if you were not there it would be happening — so it is nothing special +for you. So your ego will feel unsatisfied. And it is my feeling that if you have a Buddha +or a non-Buddha to choose as your lover, you will choose the non-Buddha. + +.. because you can understand his language. The non-Buddha is at least just like you. You +will be fighting, you will be quarrelling, the whole thing will be just a mess, a mad mess, +but still you will choose a non-Buddha. Because Buddha will be so high that you cannot +understand the way that Buddha loves unless you rise. + +With a non-Buddha, with an ignorant person, you need not transform yourself. You can +remain the same. He is not a challenge. Really just the contrary happens to lovers. When +two lovers meet and fall in love, they both try to convince each other that they are very +high. They bring out the best that is within them. They appear to be on the peak. But it +takes much arduous effort! You cannot remain on this peak. So when you start settling +down you come back down to the earth. + +So lovers are always frustrated with each other because they thought the other was just +divine, and when they settle, when everything becomes just mundane, just ordinary, they +think the other was deceiving. No, he was not deceiving, he was just presenting himself +in his best colors. That is all. He was not deceiving anybody, he was not consciously +doing anything. He was just presenting himself in his best colors. And the same was done +by the other. But you cannot go on presenting yourself like that for long because it +becomes arduous, difficult, heavy. So you come down. + +When two lovers settle, when they start to take each other for granted, then they appear +very mean, very mediocre, very ordinary — just the opposite to what they appeared to be +before. + +Then they were angels; now they appear to be just disciples of the devil. You fall down, +you come to your ordinary level. + +Ordinary love is not a challenge, but it is rare to fall in love with someone who is +enlightened. Only very fortunate ones fall in such a love. It is rare. It happens only when +you have been searching for an enlightened person for lives together. Only if this has +happened do you fall in love with an enlightened person. Fall in love with an enlightened +person is in itself a great achievement — but then there is a problem. The problem is that +the enlightened person is a challenge. He cannot come down to your level, that is not +possible, that is impossible. You have to go to his peak; you have to travel, you have to + + + +be transformed. + +So love becomes a SADHANA if you fall in love with a Buddha. It becomes a +SADHANA, the greatest SADHANA that is possible. Because of this, whenever there is +a Buddha or a Jesus, or a Lao Tzu, many around them are able to reach to peaks in one +life that they could not have reached in many lives. But the secret is if they can fall in +love. It is not unimaginable, it is imaginable. You may have been there in the time of +Buddha, you must have been somewhere around. Buddha might have passed through +your village or town and you may not have even heard him, you may not have seen him. +Because even to hear a Buddha or to see a Buddha or to come near to him, a certain love +is needed, a certain search is needed on your part. + + +When someone falls in love with an enlightened person it is meaningful, very +meaningful. But arduous will be the path. It is easy to fall in love with an ordinary +person, there is no challenge, but with an enlightened person the challenge will be much, +and the path will be difficult, because you will have to travel all above. And those things +will be disturbing. His love will be cold, his love will look as if it is for everyone, his +love will not have the hatred part. + +This has been my experience. Many people fall in love with me, and then they start to +play the game — the ordinary game. Knowingly or unknowingly, they start to play it. In a +way it is natural. They start expecting things from me, ordinary expectations, and their +mind works in the duality. For example, if you love me you will feel happy if you can +make me happy. This is how love feels, it wants to make the other happy. If you can +make me happy, you will feel happy — but you cannot make me happy, I am already. + +If you fall in love with me, you will feel dejected, you will feel very disappointed +because you cannot make me happy, you cannot make me more happy, there is nothing +more. If you cannot make me happy you will feel unhappy, and so you will try to make +me unhappy! Because at least if you can do that, that too will be a satisfaction. You will +try to make me unhappy — unknowingly, you are not alert, you are not aware of it. + +If you are aware you will not do it. But you will try — your unconscious mind will try to +make me unhappy. If you can make me unhappy then you can be certain that you can +make me happy also. But if you cannot make me unhappy you are totally disappointed. +Then you will feel that you are not related to me at all, because this is what relationship +means to you. + +Ordinary love is a disease because the duality goes on persisting. And to understand the +love of an enlightened person is difficult. Intellectually there is no way to understand it. +You have to fall in love. And then you have to be alert about your own mind because that +mind will go on disturbing. + +Buddha became enlightened, then he came back to his home — he came back after twelve +years. His wife, whom he had loved very much, was very angry, furious. All these twelve +years she had been waiting and waiting — someday this man will come back. And she had +much revenge in her mind because this man had done an injustice to her, he was unfair. +Suddenly one night he had disappeared. At least he could have said something, then it +would have been fair, but without saying anything he simply disappeared, leaving her +and their small child. For twelve years she waited, and then Buddha came. She was +furious, she was mad. + +Buddha's nearest, closest disciple was Anand. Anand had always followed him like a + + + +shadow. + + +When Buddha was entering the palace he said to Anand, "Please don’t come with me." +Anand asked why, because he had an ordinary mind, he was not enlightened. He became +enlightened only when Buddha died. He said, "Why? Are you still thinking in terms of +wife and husband? That you are going to meet your wife? Are you still thinking in terms +of wife and husband?" He was shocked. How can a Buddha, an enlightened person, say, +"Don’t come with me. I am going to meet my wife?" + +Buddha said, "That is not the point. She will get more furious seeing that I have come +with someone. She has been waiting for twelve years. Let her be mad alone. She belongs +to a very ancient family, very cultured So she will not be angry before you, she will not +express anything — and she has been waiting for twelve years. So let her explode, don't +come with me. I am not a husband to her now, but she is still a wife. I have changed, bust +she has not changed." + +Buddha went alone. Of course she was furious, she started crying and weeping and +screaming and saying things. And Buddha listened. She asked again and again, "If you +loved me at all, why did you leave? Why did you go away? And without telling me. If +you loved me at all, tell me this." And Buddha said, "If I didn’t love you, why should I +have come back?" + +But these are two different things, totally different. She was not ready to hear what he +would say. + +She went on insisting, "Why did you leave me alone? You tell me that you never loved +me, then everything is settled." And Buddha said, "I did love you. I still love you. That is +why I have come back after twelve years." But this love is different: she was angry and +Buddha was not angry. If he had also been angry because she was screaming and +weeping and crying, she could have understood. If he had also been angry and had beaten +her, she could have understood. Then everything would have been okay. He was the old +man. The twelve years would have disappeared completely and they would have loved +again. There was no problem. But he was standing silently and she was mad. Only she +was mad, he was smiling. This was too much! What type of love is this? It must have +been very hard for her to understand. + +Just to taunt Buddha she told her son, who was not twelve years old, "This is your father, +look at him, an escapist. You were just one day old when he escaped. This is your father. +He is a beggar, and he gave birth to you. Now ask about the heritage. Spread your hands +before him, he is your father. Ask him what he has to give to you." She was taunting +Buddha, she was angry, naturally. And Buddha called Anand who was standing outside +and said, "Anand, come and bring my begging bowl." When the begging bowl was given +to Buddha, he gave it to his son, Rahul, and said, "This is my heritage. I initiate you into +SANNYAS." This was his love. But Yashodhara got more mad. She said, "What are you +doing? If you love your son, you will not make him a beggar, a SANNYASIN." Buddha +said, "I make him a beggar because I love him. I know what real heritage is, and that I am +giving to him. My father was not so wise, but I know what is worth giving and I am +giving it." + +These are two different dimensions, two different languages, never meeting anywhere. + +He is loving. He must have loved his wife; that is why he came back. He must have loved +his son; that is why he initiated him. But no father can understand this. + +When Buddha's father heard about this — he was an old man, ill — he came running out + + + +and he said, "What have you done? Are you bent on destroying my whole family? You +escaped from the house, you were my only son. Now my hopes are on Rahul, he is your +only son. And you have initiated him into SANNYAS. So my family is cut. Now there is +no possibility for the future. What are you doing? Are you an enemy?" + +And Buddha said, "Because I love my son, I give him what is worth giving. Neither your +kingdom nor your family and its tree is significant. It will make no difference to the +world whether this tree goes on growing further or not. But the phenomenon of +SANNYAS that Rahul is initiated into is something significant. I also love my son." + +Two fathers talking. + +... Buddha’s father was again pleading to him, "You come back. I am your father. I am +old. I am angry. You have disappointed me. But still I have a father's heart and I will +forgive you. Come, my doors are open. Come back. Throw this sannyas, come back, my +doors are open. This kingdom is yours, I am waiting. I am very old but I have a deep love +for you and I can forgive." This is love. + +Then there is the other father, Gautam Buddha himself, giving initiation to his son to +leave the world. That too is love. + +But both loves are so different that it is not good to call them by one name, one word — +but we don't have any other. + +The second question: + +Question 2 + +LAST NIGHT YOU SAID THAT LOVE IS ALIVE BECAUSE IT IS INSECURE, AND +MARRIAGE IS DEAD BECAUSE IT IS SECURE. BUT ISN’T IT TRUE THAT LOVE +IN THE SPIRITUAL DEPTH BECOMES MARRIAGE? + +No! It never becomes marriage. The deeper it goes the more love it becomes, but never a +marriage. By marriage I mean an outer bond, a legal sanction, social approval. And I say +that love never becomes a marriage because it is never secure. It remains love. It becomes +more love, more and more, but the more it is, the more insecure it is. There is no security. +But if you love, you don’t care about security at all. When you don’t love, only then you +care about security. When you love, the very moment is so much that you don't care +about the next moment, you don't care about the future. + +What happens tomorrow is not your concern — because what is happening right now is so +much. It is too much. It is unbearably much. You don't care. Why does security come to +the mind? It comes because of the future. Really, you are not rooted in the present. You +are not living in the present. You are not enjoying it. It is not a bliss. The present is not a +bliss. Then you hope for the future, then you plan for the future, then you want to make +every security for the future. + +Love never wants to make any security, it is secure in itself. That is the point. It is so +secure in itself that it never thinks about any security; what will happen in the future is +not a concern at all — because the future is going to grow out of the present, and if the +present is so alive, so blissful, the future will grow out of it. Why worry about it? + +When the present is not a bliss, when it is a misery, then you are worried about the future. +Then you want to make it secure, safe. But remember, no one can make anything secure. +That is not in the nature of things. The future will remain insecure. You can do only one +thing: live the present more deeply. That is all you can do. If any security happens +through that, that is the only security. And if it is not happening, it is not happening — +nothing can be done. + + + +But our mind works in a completely suicidal way. The more miserable the present is, the +more you think about the future and want to make it secure. + +And the more you move into the future, the more the present will be miserable. Then you +are moving in a vicious circle. This circle can be broken, but the only way to break it is to +live the present moment so deeply that this moment becomes the eternity in its depth. The +future is going to be born out of it — it will take its own course, you need not worry about +it. + +So I say that love never thinks of security because love is so secure in itself. Love is +never afraid of insecurity. If it is there at all, if love is there at all, it is not afraid of +insecurity. Life is insecure, but love is not afraid of insecurity. Rather, love enjoys +insecurity because it gives color to life, changing seasons and moods. It gives tone. It is +beautiful. The changing life is beautiful because there is always something to discover, +there is always something to encounter which is new. + +Really, two lovers move in a constant discovery of each other. And the landscape is +infinite. A loving heart is an infinite landscape. You can never finish it. There is no end +to it. It goes on and on. It is as spacious as space itself. Love is not worried about +insecurity, love can enjoy it. It gives a thrill. Only those who cannot love are afraid of +insecurity, because they are not rooted in life. Those who cannot love are always secure +in life. They waste their life just making it secure — and it is never secure. + +It cannot be. + +Security is the quality of death; safety is the quality of death. Life is insecure, and love is +not afraid of it. Love is not afraid of life, insecurity, because it is so grounded. If you are +not grounded and you feel a cyclone coming, you will be afraid. But if you are grounded +you will welcome the cyclone, it will become an adventure. If you are rooted, the passing +cyclone will become a challenge. You will be shaken to the very roots by it; every fibre +will become alive. Then when the cyclone has gone you will not think that it was bad, a +misfortune. You will say it was fortunate, a blessing, because all the deadness has been +taken away by the cyclone. All that was dead has moved with it and all that was alive has +become more alive. + +Look at the trees after the cyclone has gone. They are vibrating with life, pulsating with +life, radiant, vital; energy is filling them. Because the cyclone gave then an opportunity to +feel their roots, to feel their 'groundedness.’ It was an opportunity to feel themselves. + +So one who is rooted in love is never afraid of anything. Whatsoever comes is beautiful, +a change — insecurity. Whatsoever happens is beautiful. But it never becomes a marriage. +When I say it never becomes a marriage I don’t mean that lovers should not marry, but +that marriage should not become a substitute for love. It should only be the outer garb, it +should not be the substitute. + +And it will never become a marriage because lovers never take each other for granted. +What I mean is that it is deeply psychological — lovers never take each other for granted. +Once you start taking the other for granted, the other has become a thing. Now he is not a +person. So marriage reduces the partners into things. A husband is a thing, a wife is a +thing — predictable, very predictable. + +I have been staying in many families all over this country and I have come to know many +wives and many husbands. They are not persons at all. They are predictable. If the +husband asserts a sentence it can even be said what the wife will say. How the wife will + + + +react is predictable. And if the wife says something mechanically the husband will reply +to it mechanically. It is certain. They are playing the same role again and again. Their life +is just like a gramophone record when something goes wrong, when the needle sticks at a +point and it goes on repeating. It is as predictable as that. You can tell what is going to +happen again and again — the husband and wife are stuck somewhere, they have become +phonograph records. Then they go on repeating. That repetition creates boredom. + +I was staying with a family. The husband said to me, "I have become afraid to be alone +with my wife. Only when someone else is there are we both happy. We cannot even go +for a holiday without taking someone with us because that someone gives something +new. + +Otherwise we know what is going to happen. It is so predictable that it is not worth +anything. We know it already." + +It is just as if you are reading the same book, again and again and again.... Lovers are not +predictable. That is the insecurity. You don't know what is going to happen — and that is +the beauty. You can be fresh and young and alive. But we want to make a thing of each +other because a thing can be manipulated easily. And you need not be afraid of a thing. +You know its whereabouts, its behavior. You can plan beforehand what to do and what +not to do. By marriage I mean an arrangement in which two persons fall to the level of +things. Love is not an arrangement: it is a moment to moment encounter, alive. Full of +danger of course, but life is so. Marriage is safe, there is no danger; love is unsafe. You +never know what is going to happen, the next moment is unknown, remains unknown. + +So love is entering every moment into the unknown — that is what Jesus means when he +says, "God is love." God is as unknown as love. And if you are not ready to be alive and +in love and insecure, you cannot move into God, because that is a greater insecurity, a +greater unknownness. So love prepares you for prayer. If you can love, and remain with +an unknown person without reducing him to a thing, without becoming predictable, +encountering moment to moment, you are getting ready for prayer. + + +Prayer is nothing but love — love for the whole existence. You are living with existence +as you are living with your lover: you don’t know the mood, you don’t know the season, +you don't know what is coming. Nothing is known. You go on uncovering it — it is an +endless journey. + +The third question: + +Question 3 + +CAN ONE WHO IS NOT ENLIGHTENED LIVE IN TOTAL INSECURITY AND NOT +BE ANXIOUS, DEPRESSED AND MISERABLE? + +Total insecurity and the capacity to live in it are synonymous with enlightenment. So one +who is not enlightened cannot live in total insecurity, and one who cannot live in total +insecurity cannot become enlightened. These are not two things, they are just two ways +of saying the same thing. So don't wait until you have become enlightened to live in +insecurity, no! Because then you will never become enlightened. + +Start living in insecurity — that is the way towards enlightenment. And don’t think about +total insecurity. Start from where you are. As you are you cannot be total in anything, but +one has to make a start. In the beginning it will create anxiety, in the beginning you will +feel miserable — but only in the beginning. If you can pass the beginning, if you can +tolerate the beginning, the misery will disappear, the anxiety will disappear. + + + +The mechanism has to be understood. Why do you feel anxiety when you feel insecure? + +It is not because of insecurity, but because of the demand for security. + +When you feel insecure you feel anxious, anxiety arises. It is not arising because of +insecurity, it is arising because of the demand to make life a security. If you start living +insecurely and don't demand security, the anxiety will disappear when the demand goes. +The demand is creating the anxiety. + +Insecurity is the very nature of life. It is an insecure world for a Buddha; for a Jesus it is +also insecure. But they are not anxious because they have accepted the fact. They have +become mature enough to accept a reality. + +This is my definition of maturity and immaturity. A person I call immature is one who +goes on fighting against reality for fictions and dreams. This man is immature. Maturity +means coming to terms with reality, throwing away dreams, and accepting the reality as it +is. Buddha is mature. He accepts. It is so. For example, although there is death, an +immature person goes on thinking that everyone may die but he is not going to die. An +immature person goes on thinking that by the time he dies something will be discovered, +some medical elixir, which means he will not die. An immature person goes on thinking +that it is not the rule to die. Of course, many have died, but in everything there are +exceptions, and he goes on thinking that he is an exception. + +Whenever someone dies you feel sympathetic, you feel, "Poor man, he has died." But it +never comes to your mind that his death is your death also. + +No, you by-=pass it. You just don't touch such delicate matters. You go on thinking that +something or other will save you — some mantra, some miracle-maker guru. Something +will happen and you will be saved. You are living in stories, children's stories. A mature +person is one who looks at the fact and accepts that life and death are together. Death is +not the end, it is the very peak of life. It is not something like an accident which happens +to life, it is something which grows in the very heart of life. It grows and comes to a +peak. So he accepts and then there is no fear of death. He accepts that security is not +possible. You can create a facade, you can have a bank balance, you can donate much +money to have some security in heaven, you can do everything, but deep down you know +nothing is really secure. The bank can cheat you, and no one knows that the priest is not a +cheat, the greatest cheat. No one knows. They write letters.... + +In India, there is a Mohammedan sect, the head priest of which writes letters to God. You +donate a particular amount of money and he will write a letter. The letter will be put with +you in your tomb, in your grave. It will be put with you so you can produce the letter. + +The money goes to the priest, the letter goes with you. But nothing is secure. + +A mature person comes to terms with reality, he accepts it as it is. he doesn’t demand. + +He is not a demander. He doesn’t say, "It should be so." He looks at the fact and says, +"Yes, it is so." This coming to terms with reality will make it impossible for you to be +miserable — because misery comes when you demand. Really, misery is nothing else than +an indication that you are moving against reality. And reality cannot be changed by you, +you will have to be changed by reality. You will have to come to terms. You will have to +yield. + +This is what the meaning of surrender is: you will have to yield. The reality cannot yield, +the reality is as it is. Unless you yield, you will suffer. The misery is created by you +because you go on fighting. It is just as if the current of a river is flowing towards the sea + + + +and you are trying to swim upcurrent. You feel the river is against you. The river is not +against you. It has not even heard about you. It doesn’t know you at all. The river is +simply flowing to the sea. It is a river's nature to flow to the sea, to move to the sea and to +fall into it. You are trying to move upstream. + +And there may be some foolish fellows sitting or standing on the bank who go on +inspiring you, "You are doing well. You shouldn’t be worried because sooner or later the +river will have to yield. You are simply great, go on doing it! Those who are great, they +have won over the river." There are always foolish people who go on giving you +inspiration, giving you more enthusiasm. + +But no Alexander, no Napoleon, no great man, no one has ever been able to go upstream. +Sooner or later the stream takes over. But when you are dead, you cannot enjoy the bliss +that was possible while you were alive; the bliss of surrendering, of accepting, of +becoming so one with the stream that there is no conflict. + +But those foolish people on the bank will say, "You have yielded, you are defeated, you +are a failure." Don't listen to them, just enjoy the inner freedom that comes with yielding. +Don't listen to them. + +When Buddha stopped trying to flow upstream, all those that knew him said, "You are an +escapist. You are a failure. You have accepted defeat." Don’t listen to what others say. +Feel the inner feeling. Feel what is happening to you. If you feel good flowing with the +stream, this is the way. This is Tao for you. Don't listen to anybody, just listen to your +own heart. Maturity accepts, whatsoever there is. + +I have heard an anecdote. A Mohammedan, a Christian and a Jew were asked a question. +The question was the same. Someone asked all three, "What would you do if a tidal wave +forces the ocean onto the land and you are drowned in it?" The Christian said, "I will +make the sign of the cross on my heart, and pray to God to allow me into heaven, to open +the doors." The Mohammedan said, "I will take the name of Allah, and will say that this +is KISMAT, this is fate — and drown." + +The Jew said, "I will thank God and accept his will and leam to live under water." + +This has to be done. One has to accept the will of existence, the will of the universe, and +learn how to live in it. This is the whole art. A mature person accepts whatsoever is here, +doesn't demand, doesn’t talk about any heaven. The Christian was doing, he was asking, +he was saying, "Open the doors of heaven." But he was also not a pessimist who simply +accepts and is drowned. The Mohammedan was doing that. The Jew accepted, welcomed +rather, and said, "This is the will, now I must learn how to live under water. This is God's +will." + +Accept the reality as it is and learn how to live in it with a yielding heart, with a +surrendered ego. + +The last question: + +Question 4 + +YOU SAID YESTERDAY THAT LIFE EXISTS WITH DEATH. THEN PLEASE +EXPLAIN WHAT IS THE NEED OF TRANSCENDENCE. + +This is the need. There is the need. Life exists with death... if you can understand this, +you have transcended. + +You accept life, you don’t accept death. Or do you? You accept life but you reject death, +and because of that you are always in trouble. You are in trouble because death is part of +life. When you accept life, death is going to be there, but you reject death. When you + + + +reject death you have rejected life also because they are not two. So you will be in +trouble. Either accept the whole, or reject the whole. + +That is transcendence. + +And there are two ways of transcending. Either accept both, life and death together, or +reject both, life and death together — then you have transcended. These are the two ways, +the negative and the positive. The negative says, "Reject both." The positive says, + +"Accept both" but the emphasis is that BOTH should be there, whether accepted or +rejected. When both are there they negate each other, just like minus and plus. They +negate each other, and when they are not, you have transcended. You are either attached +to life or attached — sometimes — to death, but you never accept both. I have come across +many people who are so dejected about life that they have started to think about +committing suicide. First they are attached to life, then life frustrates — not that life +frustrates, attachment frustrates, but they think life is frustrating — so they become +attached to death. Now they start thinking about how to destroy themselves, how to +commit suicide, how to die. But the attachment is there. Previously it was to life, now it +is to death. So a person who is attached to life and a person who is attached to death are +not different. Attachment is there and that attachment is the problem. Accept both. + +Just think. What will happen if you accept both, life and death? Immediately a silence +will come to the mind, because they negate each other. + +Life and death both disappear when you accept them — then you have transcended, you +have gone beyond. Or reject both — it is the same thing. + +Transcendence means going beyond duality. Attachment means remaining within duality, +attached to one against the other. When you accept both or reject both, attachment falls. +Your tie is unlocked. Suddenly you float into a third dimension of being, where neither +life is nor death. That is nirvana, that is moksha — where both the dualities are not, but +oneness, isness, is. And unless you transcend, you will always be in misery. + +You can change your attachment from this to that, but you will be in misery. Attachment +creates misery. Rejection also creates misery. Whatsoever you choose, it is up to you. + +You can choose a positive path, like Krishna. He says "Accept. Accept both." Or you can +choose a path like Buddha, who says, "Reject both." But do something with both +together, then transcendence follows immediately. Even if you THINK of both, there will +be transcendence. And if you can do it in real life, a new being is born. That being doesn’t +belong to the earth of duality, that being belongs to an unknown realm — the realm of +nirvana. + + +THE END. + + + +Chapter 73: Fear of transformation + + +THE APPRECIATION OF OBJECTS AND SUBJECTS IS THE SAME FOR AN +ENLIGHTENED AS FOR AN UNENLIGHTENED PERSON. THE FORMER HAS +ONE GREATNESS: HE REMAINS IN THE SUBJECTIVE MOOD, NOT LOST IN +THINGS. + +BELIEVE OMNISCIENT, OMNIPOTENT, PERVADING. + +Many people seem to be interested in meditation, but that interest cannot be very deep +because so very few are transformed through it. If the interest is really deep, it becomes a +fire by itself. It transforms you. Just through intense interest you start becoming different. +A new center of being arises. So many people seem to be interested but nothing new +arises in them, no new center is bom, no new crystallization is achieved. They remain the +same. + +That means they are deceiving themselves. The deception is very subtle but it is bound to +be there. If you go on taking medicine, having treatments, and the illness remains the +same — rather on the contrary, it goes on increasing — then your medicine, your +treatment, is bound to be false. Maybe deep down you don't want to be transfonned. That +fear is very real — the fear of transformation. So on the surface you go on thinking that +you are deeply interested, but deep down you go on deceiving. + +The fear of transformation is just like the fear of death. It is a death, because the old will +have to go and the new will come into being. You will be there no more, something +totally unknown to you will be born out of you. + +Unless you are ready to die, your interest in meditation is false, because only those who +are ready to die will be reborn. The new cannot become a continuity with the old. The old +must be discontinued. The old must go. Only then can the new come into being. The new +is not an outgrowth of the old, the new is not continuous with it — the new is totally new. +And it comes only when the old dies. There is a gap between the old and the new — that +gap gives you the fear. You are afraid. You want to be transformed but simultaneously +you want to remain the old. This is the deception. You want to grow, but you want to +remain you. Then growth is impossible; then you can only deceive; then you can go on +thinking and dreaming that something is happening, but nothing will happen because the +basic point has been missed. + +So there are many people all over the world who are very interested in meditation, +moksha, nirvana, and nothing is happening. There is so much noise about it but nothing +real is happening. What is the matter? + +Sometimes the mind is so cunning that because you don't want to be transformed, the +mind will create a superficial interest so that you can say to yourself, "You are interest, +you are doing whatsoever can be done." And you remain the same. And if nothing +happens, you think that the technique you are using is wrong, the guru you are following +is wrong, the scripture, the principle, the method, is wrong. + +You never think that even with a wrong method transformation is possible if the real +interest is there; even with a wrong method you will be transfonned. If you are really +interested in transformation, you will become different even if following a wrong guru. If +your soul and your heart is in your effort, no one can mislead you except yourself. And + + + +nothing is a barrier to your progress except your own deceptions. + +When I say that even a wrong master, a wrong method, a wrong principle, can lead you +to the real, I mean that the real transfonnation happens when you are intensely involved +in it, not through any method. The method is just a device, the method is just a help, the +method is secondary — your being involved in it is the fundamental thing. But you go on +doing something — not even doing, you go on talking about doing. And words create an +illusion: because you think so much about it, you read so much about it, you listen so +much about it, that you start feeling you are doing something. So-called religious persons +have developed many deception devices. + +I have heard that a motorist, driving along a road, saw the school building on fire. The +teacher of the small school of that small village was Mulla Nasruddin. He was sitting +under a tree. The motorist called to him, "What are you doing there? The school building +is on fire!" Mulla Nasruddin said, "I know about it." + +The motorist was much excited. He said, "Then why are you not doing something?" + +Mulla Nasruddin said, "Ever since it started I have been praying for rain. I am doing +something." + +Prayer is a trick to avoid meditation, and the so-called religious mind has developed +many types of prayer. Prayer can also become a meditation — when it is not only a +prayer, it is a deep effort, a deep involvement. Prayer can also become meditation, but +ordinarily prayer is just an escape. To avoid meditation, people go on praying. To avoid +doing anything they pray. Prayer means that God must do something. Someone else must +do. Prayer means that we are passive — something must be done to us. Meditation is not +prayer in that sense: meditation is something you do to yourself. And when you are +transformed, the whole universe behaves differently to you, because the universe is +nothing but a response to you, whatsoever you are. If you are silent, the whole universe +responds to your silence in thousands and thousands of ways. It reflects you. Your silence +is multiplied infinitely. If you are blissful, the whole universe rejects your bliss. If you +are in misery, the same happens. The mathematics remains the same, the law remains the +same: the universe goes on multiplying your misery. Prayer won’t do. Only meditation +can help because meditation is something to be done authentically by you, it is a doing on +your part. + + +So the first thing I would like to say to you is be constantly alert that you are not +deceiving yourself. You may be doing something and still deceiving yourself. + +I have heard that Mulla Nasruddin once came running into a post office, grasping the +postmaster by the lapel, shook him, and said, "I have gone crazy. My wife has +disappeared!" The postmaster felt sorry and he said, "Really, she has disappeared? +Unfortunately this is a postal department — you have to go to the police department to +report this disappearance." Mulla Nasruddin shook his head negatively and said, "I am +not going to be caught again. In the past my wife also disappeared and when I reported it +to the police department, they found her. I am not going to be caught again. If you can +take the report, take it, otherwise I am going." + +He wants to report to feel good, to feel that he has done whatsoever can be done. But he +doesn't want to report to the police department because he is afraid. + +You go on doing things just to feel good, just to feel that you are doing something. But +really you are not ready to be transformed. So all that you do just passes as useless + + + +activity — not only useless, harmful also, because it is a wastage of time, energy, and +opportunity. These techniques of Shiva are only for those who are ready to do. You can +ponder over them philosophically — that means nothing. + +But if you are actually ready to do, then something will start happening to you. They are +alive methods, not dead doctrines. Your intellect is not needed; your totality of being is +required. And any method will do. If you are ready to give it a chance, any method will +do. You will become a new man. + +Methods are devices, I will repeat again. If you are ready, then any method can do. They +are just tricks to help you to take the jump, they are just like jumping boards. From any +jumping board you can jump into the ocean. The jumping boards are insignificant: what +color they are, what wood they are made of is irrelevant. They are simply jumping boards +and you can take a jump from them. All these methods are jumping boards. Whatsoever +method takes your fancy, don't go on thinking about it, do it! + +Difficulties will arise when you start doing something — if you don’t do anything there +will be no difficulty. Thinking is very easy doing because you are not really traveling, but +when you start doing something, difficulties arise. So if you see that difficulties have +arisen, you can feel that you are on the right track — something is happening to you. Then +old barriers will break, old habits will go, there will be change, there will be disturbance +and chaos. All creativity comes out of chaos. You will be created anew only if all that +you are becomes chaotic. So these methods will destroy you first, then only will a new +being be created. + +If there are difficulties, feel fortunate — that shows growth. No growth is smooth... and +spiritual growth cannot be smooth, that is not its nature. Because spiritual growth means +growing upwards, spiritual growth means reaching into the unknown, reaching into the +uncharted. Difficulties will be there. But remember that with each difficulty that is passed +you are crystalized. You become more solid. You become more real. For the first time +you will feel something centering within you, something becoming solid. + +As you are now you are just a liquid phenomenon, changing every moment, nothing +stable. Really you cannot claim any T — you don't have one. You are many 'I's' just in a +flow, a river-like flow. You are a crowd, not an individual yet. But meditation can make +you an individual. + +This word 'individual' is beautiful: it means indivisible. Right now as you are, you are +divided. You are only many fragments clinging together anyhow without any center +being there, without any master in the house, with only servants. And for a moment any +servant can become the master. + +Every moment you are different because you are not — and unless you are, the Divine +cannot happen to you. To whom can it happen? You are not there. People come to me +and they say, "We would like to see God." I ask them, "Who will see? You are not there. +God is always there, but you are not there to see. + +It is just a passing thought that you want to see God." The next moment they are not +interested; the next moment they have forgotten all about it. A persistent, intense effort +and longing is needed. Then any method will do. + +Now, we should enter the methods. + +The first method: + +THE APPRECIATION OF OBJECTS AND SUBJECTS IS THE SAME FOR AN + + + +ENLIGHTENED AS FOR AN UNENLIGHTENED PERSON. THE FORMER HAS +ONE GREATNESS: HE REMAINS IN THE SUBJECTIVE MOOD, NOT LOST IN +THINGS. + +There is a very beautiful method. You can start it as you are; no other prerequisite is +needed. The method is simple: you are surrounded by persons, things, phenomena — +every moment something is around you. Things are there, events are there, persons are +there — but because you are not alert, you are not there. Everything is there but you are +fast asleep. Things move around you, persons move around you, events move around +you, but you are not there. Or, you are asleep. + +So whatsoever happens in your surroundings becomes a master, becomes a force over +you; you are dragged by it. You are not only impressed, conditioned by it, you are +dragged by it. + +Anything can catch you, and you will follow it. Somebody passes — you look, the face is +beautiful — and you are carried away. The dress is beautiful, the color, the material is +beautiful — you are carried away. The car passes — you are carried away. + +Whatsoever happens around you, catches you. You are not powerful. Everything else is +more powerful than you. Anything changes you. Y our mood, your being, your mind, +depend on other things. Objects influence you. + +This sutra says that enlightened persons and unenlightened persons live in the same +world. A Buddha and you both live and move in the same world — the world remains the +same. The difference is not in the world, the difference happens in the Buddha: he moves +in a different way. He moves among the same objects but he moves in a different way. + +He is his own master. His subjectivity remains aloof and untouched. That is the secret. +Nothing can impress him; nothing from the outside can condition him; nothing can +overpower him. He remains detached; he remains himself. If he wants to go somewhere, +he will go, but he will remain the master. If he wants to pursue a shadow, he will pursue +it, but it is his own decision. + +This distinction must be understood. By 'detachment’ I don’t mean a person who has +renounced the world — then there is no sense and no meaning in detachment. A detached +person is a person who is living in the same world as you — the difference is not in the +world. A person who renounces the world is changing the situation, not himself. And you +will insist on changing the situation if you cannot change yourself. That is the indication +of a weak personality. + +A strong person, alert and aware, will start to change himself... not the situation in which +he is. Because really the situation cannot be changed — even if you can change the +situation, there will be other situations. Every moment situations go on changing so every +moment the problem will be there. + +This is the difference between the religious and the non-religious attitude. The non- +religious attitude is to change the situation, the surrounding. It doesn’t believe in you, it +believes in situations: when the situation is okay, you will be okay. You are dependent on +the situation: if the situation is not okay, you will not be okay. So you are not an +independent entity. For communists, Marxists, socialists, and all those who believe in +changing the situation, you are not important; really, you don’t exist. Only the situation +exists and you are just a mirror which reflects the situation. The religious attitude says +that as you are you may be a mirror, but this is not your destiny — you can become +something more, someone who is not dependent. + + + +There are three steps of growth. Firstly, the situation is the master, you are just dragged +by it. You believe that 'you are’, but you are not. Secondly, 'you are’, and the situation +cannot drag you, the situation cannot influence you because you have become a will, you +are integrated and crystalized. Thirdly, you start influencing the situation: just by your +being there, the situation changes. + + +The first state is that of the unenlightened; the second state is of the person who is +constantly aware but as yet unenlightened — he has to be alert, he has to do something to +be alert. The alertness has not become natural yet so he has to fight. If he loses +consciousness or alertness for a single moment, he will be in the influence of the thing. + +So he has to stand on his toes continuously. He is the seeker, the SADHAK, the one who +is practising something. The third state is that of the SIDDHA, the enlightened one. He is +not trying to be alert, he simply is alert — there is no effort to it. Alertness is just like +breathing: it goes on, he does not have to maintain it. When alertness becomes a +phenomenon like breathing, natural, SAHAJ, spontaneous, then this type of person, this +type of centered being, automatically influences situations. Situations change around him +— not that he wishes them to change, but he is powerful. + +Power is the thing to be remembered. You are powerless so anything can overpower you. +And power comes through alertness, awareness: the more alert, the more powerful; the +less alert, the less powerful. Look... while you are asleep even a dream becomes powerful +because you are fast asleep, you have lost all consciousness. Even a dream is powerful, +and you are so weak that you cannot even doubt it. Even in an absurd dream you cannot +be skeptical, you will have to believe it. + +And while it lasts, it looks real. You may see just absurd things in the dream, but while +you are dreaming, you cannot doubt. You cannot say this is not real; you cannot say this +is a dream; you cannot say this is impossible. You simply cannot say it because you are +so fast asleep. When consciousness is not there even a dream affects you. While awake, +you will laugh and you will say, "It was absurd, impossible, this cannot happen. This +dream was just illusory." But you have not noticed that while it was there you were +influenced by it, you were totally taken over by it. Why was a dream so powerful? The +dream was not powerful — you were powerless. Remember this: when you are powerless +even a dream becomes powerful. + +While you are awake, a dream cannot influence you, but reality, the so-called reality +around, does. An awakened person, an enlightened person, has become so alert that your +reality also cannot influence him. If a woman passes, a beautiful woman, you are +suddenly carried away. Desire has arisen, the desire to possess. If you are alert, the +woman will pass by, but the desire will not arise — you have not been influenced, you +have not been taken over. When this happens for the first time, when things move around +you and you are not influenced, you will feel a subtle joy of being. For the first time +really you feel that you are; nothing can drag you out of you. + +If you want to follow, that is another thing. That is your decision. But don’t deceive +yourself. You can deceive. You can say, "Yes. The woman is not powerful, but I want to +follow her, I want to possess her." You can deceive. Many people go on deceiving. But +you are deceiving nobody except yourself — then it is futile. Just take a close look: you +will know the desire is there. The desire comes first, and then you start rationalizing it. + + + +For an enlightened person, things are there and he is there but there is no bridge between +him and the thing. The bridge has broken. He moves alone. He lives alone. He follows +himself. Nothing else can possess him. Because of this feeling we have called this +attainment MOKSHA — total freedom, MUKTI. He is totally free. + +Ah over the world, man has searched for freedom; you cannot find a man who is not +hankering after freedom in his own way. Through many paths man tries to find a state of +being where he can be free, and he resents anything that gives him a feeling of bondage. +He hates it. Anything that hinders, that makes him imprisoned, he fights. He struggles +against it. Hence so many political fights, so many wars, revolutions; hence so many +continuous family fights — wife and husband, father and son, all fighting each other. The +fight is basic. The fight is for freedom. The husband feels confined, the wife has +imprisoned him — now his freedom is cut. + +And the wife feels the same. They both resent each other, they both fight, they both try to +destroy the bondage. The father fights the son because every stage of growth in the son +means more freedom for him. And the father feels he is losing something: power, +authority. In families, in nations, in civilizations, man is hankering after only one thing — +freedom. + +But nothing is achieved through political fights, revolutions, wars. Nothing is achieved. +Because even if you get freedom, it is superficial — deep down you remain in bondage. + +So every freedom proves a disillusionment. Man longs so much for wealth, but as far as I +understand it, it is not a longing for wealth, it is a longing for freedom. Wealth gives you +a feeling of freedom. If you are poor, you are confined, your means are limited — you +cannot do this, you cannot do that. You don’t have the money to do it. The more money +you have, the more you feel you have freedom, you can do anything you like. But when +you have all the money and you can do all that you wish, imagine, dream about, suddenly +you feel this freedom is superficial, because inside your being knows well that you are +powerless and that anything can attract you. You are impressed, influenced, possessed by +things and persons. + +This sutra says that you have to come to a state of consciousness where nothing +impresses you, you can remain detached. + +How to do it? Throughout the whole day the opportunity is there to do it. That is why I +say this method is good for you to do. Any moment you can become aware that +something is possessing you. Then take a deep breath, inhale deeply, exhale deeply, and +look at the thing again. While you are exhaling look at the thing again, but look just as a +witness, as a spectator. If you can achieve the witnessing state of mind for even a single +moment, suddenly you will feel you are alone, nothing can impress you; at least in that +moment nothing can create desire in you. Take a deep breath and exhale it whenever you +feel that something is impressing you, influencing you, dragging you away from you, +becoming more important than yourself. And in that small gap created by the exhalation +look at the thing — a beautiful face, a beautiful body, a beautiful building, or anything. If +you feel it is difficult, if just by exhaling you cannot create a gap, then do one thing more: +exhale, and stop inhalation for a single moment so the exhalation has thrown all the air +out. Stop, don't inhale. Then look at the thing. When the air is out, or in, when you have +stopped breathing, nothing can influence you. In that moment you are unbridged — the +bridge is broken. Breathing is the bridge. Try it. It will be only for a single moment that +you will have the feeling of witnessing, but that will give you the taste, that will give you + + + +the feeling of what witnessing is. + + +Then you can pursue it. Throughout the whole day, whenever something impresses you +and a desire arises, exhale, stop in the interval, and look at the thing. The thing will be +there, you will be there, but there will be no bridge. Breathing is the bridge. Suddenly +you will feel you are powerful, you are potential. And the more powerful you feel, the +more YOU will become. The more things drop, the more their power over you drops, the +more crystalized you will feel. Individuality has begun. Now you have a center to refer +to, and any moment you can move to the center and the world disappears. Any moment +you can take shelter in your own center, and the world is powerless. + +This sutra says, THE APPRECIATION OF OBJECTS AND SUBJECTS IS THE SAME +FOR AN ENLIGHTENED AS FOR AN UNENLIGHTENED PERSON. THE FORMER +HAS ONE GREATNESS: HE REMAINS IN THE SUBJECTIVE MOOD, NOT LOST +IN THINGS. He remains in the subjective mood, he remains within himself, he remains +centered in consciousness. Remaining in the subjective mood has to be practised. As +many opportunities as you can get, try it. And every moment there is an opportunity, +every single moment there is an opportunity. Something or other is impressing you, +dragging you out, pulling you out, pushing you in. + +I am reminded of an old story. A great king, Bharthruhari, renounced the world. He +renounced the world because he had lived in it totally and he had come to realize that it +was futile. + +It was not a doctrine to him, it was a lived reality. He had come to the conclusion through +his own life. He was a man of strong desire, he had indulged in life as much as possible, +then suddenly he realized it was useless, futile. So he left the world, he renounced it, and +he went to a forest. + +One day he was meditating under a tree. The sun was rising. Suddenly he became aware +that just on the road, the small road which passed nearby the tree, lay a very big diamond. +As the sun was rising, it was reflecting the rays. Even Bharthruhari had not seen such a +big diamond before. Suddenly, in a moment of unawareness, a desire arose to possess it. +The body remained unmoved, but the mind moved. The body was in the posture of +meditation, SIDDHASANA, but the meditation was no longer there. Only the dead body +was there, the mind had moved — it had gone to the diamond. + +Before the king could move, two men came from different directions on their horses and +simultaneously they became aware of the diamond lying on the street. They pulled out +their swords, each one claiming that he had sene the diamond first. There was no other +way to decide so they had to fight. They fought and killed each other. Within moments +two dead bodies were lying there next to the diamond. Bharthruhari laughed, closed his +eyes, and went into meditation again. + +What happened? He again realized the futility. + +And what happened to these two men? The diamond became more meaningful than their +whole life. This is what possession means: they threw away their life just for a stone. +When desire is there, you are no more — desire can lead you to suicide. Really, every +desire is leading you to suicide. When you are in the power of a desire, you are not in +your senses, you are just mad. + +The desire to possess arose in Bharthruhari's mind also; in a fragment of a moment the +desire arose. And he might have moved to get it but before he could, the other two + + + +persons came and fought, and there were two dead bodies lying on the road with the +stone there in its own place. Bharthruhari laughed, closed his eyes, and went into his +meditation again. For a single moment his subjectivity was lost. A stone, a diamond, the +object, became more powerful. But again the subjectivity was regained. Without the +diamond the whole world disappeared, and he closed his eyes. + +For centuries meditators have been closing their eyes. Why? It is only symbolic that the +world has disappeared, that there is nothing to look at, that nothing is worth anything, +even to look at. You will have to remember continuously that whenever desire arises, you +have moved out of your subjectivity. This is the world, this movement. Regain, move +back, get centered again! You will be able to do it: the capacity is there with everyone. + +No one ever loses the inner potential, it is always there. You can move. If you can move +out, you can move in. If I can go out of my house, why can I not come back within it? + +The same route is to be traveled; the same legs are to be used. If I can go out, I can come +in. Every moment you are moving out, but whenever you move out, remember — and +suddenly come back. Be centered. If you feel it difficult in the beginning then take a deep +breath, exhale, and stop. In that moment look at the thing which was attracting you. +Really, nothing was attracting you, YOU were attracted. That diamond lying there on the +road in the lonely forest was not attracting anybody, it was simply lying there being +itself. The diamond was not aware that Bharthruhari had been attracted, that someone had +moved from his meditation, from his subjectivity, had come back into the world. The +diamond was not aware that two persons had fought for it and lost their lives. + +So nothing is attracting you — YOU get attracted. Be alert and the bridge will be broken +and you will regain balance inside. Go on doing it more and more. The more you do, the +better. And a moment will come when you will not need to do it because the inner power +will give you such a strength that the attraction of things will be lost. It is your weakness +which is attracted. Be more powerful and nothing will attract you. Only then for the first +time are you master of your own being. + + +That will give you real freedom. No political freedom, no economic freedom, no social +freedom, can be of much help. Not that they are not desirable, they are good, good in +themselves, but they will not give you the things which the innermost core of your being +is longing for — the freedom from things, from objects, the freedom to be oneself without +any possibility of being possessed by anything or anybody. + +The second technique is similar in a way, but it is from a different dimension. + +BELIEVE OMNISCIENT, OMNIPOTENT, PERVADING. + +This too is based on inner power, inner strength. It is very seed-like. Believe that you are +omniscient, all-knowing; believe that you are omnipotent, all-powerful; believe that you +are pervading, all-pervading.... How can you believe it? It is impossible. You know you +are not all-knowing, you are ignorant. You know you are not all-potent, you are +absolutely powerless, helpless. You know you are not all-pervading, you are confined in +a small body. So how can you believe it? And if you believe it, knowing well that this is +not the case, the belief will be useless. You cannot believe against yourself. You can +force a belief, but it will be useless, meaningless. You know it is not so. A belief becomes +useful only when you know that it is so. + +This has to be understood. A belief becomes powerful if you know that this is the case. + + + +True or untrue is not the point. If you know that this is the case, a belief becomes truth. If +you know that this is not the case, then even a truth cannot become a belief. Why? Many +things have to be understood. + +Firstly, whatsoever you are is your belief: you believe in that way, you have been brought +up in that way; you have been conditioned in that way, so you believe in that way. And +your belief influences you. It becomes a vicious circle. For example, there are races +where man is less powerful than woman, because those races believe that a woman is +stronger, more powerful, than man. Their belief has become a fact. In those races, man is +weaker and woman is stronger. The women do all the work that ordinarily, in other +countries, men would do, and men do the work that in other countries women would do. +Not only that, their bodies are weak, their structure is weak. They have come to believe +that this is so. The belief creates the phenomenon. Belief is creative. + +Why does this happen? Because mind is more powerful than matter. If mind really +believes something, matter has to follow. Matter cannot do anything against the mind +because matter is dead. Even impossibilities happen. Jesus says, "Faith can move +mountains." Faith CAN move mountains. If it cannot, it only means that you don't have +faith — not that faith cannot move mountains. Your faith cannot move them because you +don’t have the faith. + + +Now much research is going on on this phenomenon of belief, and science is coming to +many unbelievable conclusions. Religion always believed in them but science is finally +coming to the same conclusions. It has to because many phenomena are being +investigated for the first time. For example, you may have heard about placebo +medicines. There are hundreds and hundreds of 'pathies' in the world — allopathy, +ayurvedic, unani, homeopathy, naturopathy — hundreds, and they all claim that they can +cure. And they do cure. Their claims are not false. This is the rare thing — their diagnosis +is different, their treatment is different. There is one illness and there are a hundred and +one diagnoses, and a hundred and one treatments, and every treatment helps. So the +question is bound to be raised whether it is really the treatment that helps or the belief of +the patient. This is possible. + +In many ways, in many countries, in many universities, in many hospitals, they are +working. Just water or something non-medicinal is given but the patient believes that a +medicine has been given. And not only the patient, the doctor also believes it, because he +also is not aware. If the doctor is aware whether it is medicine or not, it will have an +effect, because the doctor gives a belief to the patient more that a medicine. So when you +pay more and you have a greater doctor, you get well better and sooner. + +It is a question of belief. If the doctor gives you a four-penny medicine, just four pennies, +you know well that nothing is going to happen. How can such a big patient with such a +disease, such a great phenomenon, be cured by four pennies? Impossible! The belief +cannot be created. Every doctor has to create around him an aura of belief. It helps. So if +the doctor knows that it is just water that he is giving, he will not give his belief with +faith. His face will show, his hands will show, his whole attitude and behavior will show +that he is giving just water, and the unconscious of the patient will be affected. The +doctor must believe. The more he believes the better, because his belief is infectious. The +patient looks at the doctor. If the doctor feels confident — "Don’t worry, this is a new +treatment, a new medicine and this is going to help you. It is a hundred per cent certain. + + + +There is no doubt about it" — if the whole personality of the doctor gives the impression +of a hundred per cent hope, then already, even before taking the medicine, the patient is +being cured. The cure has already started. Now they say that whatsoever you use, thirty +per cent of the patients will be cured almost immediately; whatsoever you use — +allopathy, naturopathy, homeopathy, or any 'pathy' — whatsoever you do, thirty per cent +of the patients will be cured immediately. + +Those thirty per cent are believers. + +That's the ratio. If I look at you, into you, thirty per cent are potential, are ones who can +immediately be transfonned. Once they get the belief, it will immediately start working. +One third of humanity can be immediately transfonned, changed, to new orders of being +without any difficulty. The question is only how to create the belief in them. Once the +belief is there, nothing can debar them. You may be one of those fortunate ones, one of +the thirty per cent. But a great misfortune has happened to humanity, and that is that +those thirty per cent are condemned. Society, education, civilization, all condemn them. +They are thought to be stupid people. No, they are more potential people. They have a +great power but they are condemned, and impotent intellectual people are praised — +because they can praise with language, words, reason, they are praised. Really, they are +simply impotent. They cannot do anything in the real world of inner being, they can just +go on with their mind. But they possess the universities, they possess the news media, +they are the masters in a way. And they are artists in condemnation. They can condemn +anything. And this thirty per cent of potential humanity, those who can believe and can +get transformed, they are not so articulate — they cannot be. They cannot reason, they +cannot argue, that's why they can believe. But because they cannot argue their case they +have themselves become self-condemning. + +They think something is wrong. If you can believe, you start feeling that something is +wrong with you; if you can doubt, you think something is great with you. But doubt is not +a force. Through doubt no one ever got to the innermost being, to the ultimate ecstasy, no +one, ever. + +If you can believe, then this sutra will be helpful. BELIEVE OMNISCIENT, +OMNIPOTENT, PERVADING. You are that already so just by believing it, all that is +hiding you, all that is covering you, will fall down immediately. But even for those thirty +per cent it will be difficult because they are also conditioned to believe in something +which is not the case. They are also conditioned to doubt; they are also trained to be +skeptical; and they know their limitations, so how can they believe? Or, if they believe, +people will think they are mad. If you say that you believe that inside you is the all- +pervading, the omnipotent, the Divine, the all-powerful, then people will look at you and +think you have gone crazy. How can you believe such things unless you are mad? + +But try something. Start from the very beginning. Get a little feeling of this phenomenon, +then belief will follow. If you want to use this technique, do this. Close your eyes and just +feel that you have no body, feel as if the body has disappeared, melted away. Then you +can feel your all-pervadingness. With the body it is difficult. That's why many traditions +go on teaching that you are not the body because with the body, limitation comes in. + +It is not difficult to feel that you are not the body, because you are not the body. It is just +a conditioning, it is just a thought that has been forced upon your mind. Your mind has +been impregnated with the thought that you are the body. + + + +There are phenomena which demonstrate this. In Ceylon, Buddhist monks walk on fire. +They do in India also, but the Ceylonese phenomenon is very rare — they walk for hours +and they are not burned. + +It happened once, just a few years ago, that a Christian missionary went to see the fire- +walk. They do it on the night when Buddha became enlightened, a full moon night — +because they say that on that day it was revealed to the world that the body is nothing, +matter is nothing; that the inner being is all-pervading and the fire cannot burn it. But to +do this for one year the monks who walk on the fire purify their bodies, through +PRANAYAMA, breathing processes, and fasting. They meditate to purify their minds, +empty their minds. For one year continuously they prepare. They live in isolated cells just +feeling that they are not in their bodies. For one year continuously a group of fifty or +sixty monks goes on thinking that they are not their bodies. A year is a long time. +Thinking every moment only one thing — that they are not their bodies — continuously +hammering that the body is illusory, they come to believe it. Then too they are not forced +to walk on the fire. + +They are brought to the fire and then whosoever thinks that he will not be burned, jumps +into it. A few remain doubting, hesitating — they are not allowed to jump because this is +not a question of fire burning or not, this is a question of their doubt. If they hesitate a +little they are stopped. So sixty are prepared and sometimes twenty, sometimes thirty +people jump into the fire and they dance in it for hours together without getting burned. + +A missionary came to see it in nineteen-fifty. He was very surprised but he thought that if +belief in Buddha could do this miracle, then why not belief in Jesus? So he thought for a +while, hesitated a little, but then, with the idea that if Buddha could help, Jesus would +also help, he jumped. He got burned, badly burned; he had to be hospitalized for six +months. And he couldn’t understand the phenomenon. It was not a question of Jesus or +Buddha, it was not a question of belief in someone, it was a question of belief. And that +belief has to be hammered into the mind. Unless it reaches to the very core of your being, +it will not start working. + +That Christian missionary went back to England to study about hypnosis, mesmerism, +and allied phenomena, and what happens during fire-walking. Then they invited two +monks to Oxford University to give a demonstration. The monks went. They walked on +fire. The experiment was tried many times. + +Then the two monks saw that one professor was looking at them, and he was looking so +deeply and he was so involved that his eyes, his face, were ecstatic. The two monks went +to the professor and said to him, "You can also come with us." Immediately he ran with +them, jumped into the fire, and nothing happened, he was not burned. The Christian +missionary was also present, and he knew well that this professor was a professor of +logic, a man who is professionally doubtful, whose profession is based on doubt. So he +said to the man, "What! You have done a miracle. I couldn't do it, and I am a believer." +The professor said, "In that moment I was a believer. The phenomenon was so real, so +fantastically real, it gripped me. It was so clear that body is nothing and mind is +everything and I felt so ecstatically in tune with the two monks that when they invited +me, there was not a single hesitation. It was simple to walk, it was just as if there was no +fire." + +There was no hesitation, no doubt — that is the key. + +So first try this experiment. Sit with closed eyes for a few days just thinking that you are + + + +not your body — not only thinking but feeling that you are not your body. And if you sit +with closed eyes a distance is created. Your body goes on moving away and away. You +go on moving inwards. A great distance is created. Soon you can feel that you are not the +body. If you feel you are not the body, then you can believe you are all-pervading, +omnipotent, omniscient, all-knowing, all-powerful. + +This all-powerfulness or this all-knowingness is not concerned with so-called knowledge: +it is a feeling, an explosion of feeling — that you KNOW. This has to be understood, +particularly in the West, because whenever you say that you know, they will say, "What? +What do you know?" Knowledge must be objective. You must know something. And if it +is a question of knowing something you cannot be all-pervading, no one can be, because +there are infinite facts to be known. No one can be all-knowing in that sense. + +That's why in the West they laugh when Jains claim that Mahavir was SARVAGYA, all- +knowing. They laugh, because if Mahavir was all-knowing, then he must have known all +that science is discovering now and even that which science will discover in future. But +that doesn’t seem to be the case. He says many things which are obviously contradictory +to science, which cannot be true, which are not factual. His knowledge, if it is all- +pervading, should never be erroneous. But there are errors. + +Christians believe that Jesus was all-knowing. But the modern mind will laugh because +he was not all-knowing — all-knowing in the sense of knowing all about the facts of the +world. He didn’t know that the earth was circular, that the earth was a globe — he didn't +know. He knew that the earth was flat ground. He didn’t know that the earth had been in +existence for millions and millions of years, he believed that God created it just four +thousand years before him. + +As far as facts, objective facts are concerned, he was not all-knowing. + +But this word 'all-knowing' is totally different. When the Eastern sages say 'all-knowing', +they don’t mean knowing all about the facts — they mean all-conscious, all-aware, fully +inside, fully conscious, enlightened. They are not concerned with knowing something, +they are concerned only with the pure phenomenon of knowing — not knowledge, but the +very quality of knowing. When we say that Buddha knows we don’t mean that he knows +what Einstein knows. He doesn't know that. He is a knower. He knows his own being and +that being is all-pervading. That feeling of isness is all-pervading. And in that knowing +nothing remains to be known, that is the point. Now there is no curiosity to know +anything. All questions have dropped. Not that all answers have been achieved, all +questions have dropped. Now there is no question to be asked. All curiosity has gone. +There is no problem to be solved. This inner quietness, this inner silence, filled with inner +light, is infinite knowing. This is what is meant by omniscient. It is subjective awakening. +This you can do. But it will not happen if you go on adding more knowledge to your +mind. You can go on adding knowledge for lives together — you will know something +but you will never know all. The all is infinite; it cannot be known in that way. Science +will always remain incomplete, it can never be complete — that's impossible. + +It is inconceivable that it can be complete. Really, the more science knows, the more it +comes to know that more has to be known. + +This all-knowingness is an inner quality of awakening. Meditate, and drop your thoughts. +When you don’t have any thoughts you will feel what this omniscience is, what this all- +knowledge is. When there is no thought, consciousness becomes pure, purified; in that + + + +purified consciousness you don’t have any problem. All questions have dropped. You +know yourself, your being, and when you know your being, you have known all, because +your being is the center of everybody's being. Really your being is everybody's being. +Your center is the center of the universe. In this sense, Upanishads have declared, +"AHAM BRAHMASMI — I am the Brahman, I am the Absolute." Once you kn ow this +little phenomenon of your being you have known the infinite. You are just like a drop of +the ocean: if even one drop is known, all the secrets of the ocean become revealed. +BELIEVE OMNISCIENT, OMNIPOTENT, PERVADING. But this will come through +faith, this you cannot argue with yourself. You cannot convince yourself with some +argument, you will have to dig deep within you for such feelings, for sources of such +feelings. + +This word 'believe' is very significant. It doesn’t mean that you have a conviction, +because conviction means a rational thing: you are convinced, you have argued it over, +you have proofs for it. + +Belief means you don’t have any doubts about it, not that you have proofs. Conviction +means you have proofs. You can prove, you can argue. You can say, "This is so." You +can reason it out. Belief means you don't have any doubts. You cannot argue it, you +cannot rationalize, you will be defeated if you are asked. But you have an inner +grounding — you feel it is so. It is a feeling, not a reasoning. + +But remember that such techniques can work only if you work with your feeling, not with +your reasoning. So it has happened many times that very ignorant people, uneducated, +uncultured, reach heights of human consciousness and those who are very cultured, +educated, reasonable, rational, miss. + +Jesus was just a carpenter. Friedrich Nietzsche writes somewhere that in the whole New +Testament there was only one person really worth something, who was cultured, +educated, philosophically knowledgeable, wise — that man was Pilate, the Roman +governor who ordered Jesus to be crucified. Really he was the most cultured man, the +governor-general, the viceroy. And he knew what philosophy was: at the last moment, +when Jesus was going to be crucified, he asked, "What is truth?" It was a very +philosophical question. Jesus remained silent — not because this puzzle was not worth +answering, Pilate was the only person who could have understood deep philosophy — +Jesus remained silent because he could speak only to those who could feel. + +Thinking was not of any use. He was asking a philosophical question. It would have been +good if he had asked in a university, in an academy, but asking Jesus a philosophical +question was meaningless. He remained silent because it was futile to answer. No +communication was possible. But Nietzsche, himself a man of reason, condemns Jesus. +He said he was uneducated, uncultured, unphilosophical — and he couldn't answer, that's +why he remained silent. Pilate asked a beautiful question. If he had asked it of Nietzsche, +Nietzsche would have talked about it for years together. "What is truth?" This one +question is enough to talk about and discuss for years. All of philosophy is just this +business: "What is truth?" One question and all the philosophers are involved in it. +Nietzsche's criticism is really a criticism by reason, a condemnation by reason. Reason +has always condemned the dimension of feeling because feeling is so vague, so +mysterious. It is there, and you cannot say anything about it. Either you have got it or you +haven't got it; either it is there or it is not there. You cannot do anything about it and you +cannot discuss it. You also have many beliefs but those beliefs are just convictions; they + + + +are not beliefs because you have doubts about them. You have crushed those doubts by +your arguments, but they are there. You are sitting on top of them, but they are there. + +You go on fighting with them, but they are not dead. They cannot be. That’s why your +life may be that of a Hindu, or a Mohammedan, or a Christian, or a Jain, but it is only +because of conviction. Faith is not there. + +I will tell you an anecdote. Jesus told his disciples to go by boat to the other ba nk of a +lake where they were staying. And he said, "I will be coming later." They went. When +they were just in the middle of the lake a great wind came and there was much turmoil +and they were afraid. The boat was rocking and they started crying and screaming. They +started crying, "Jesus, save us!" The bank where Jesus was was very far away, but Jesus +came. It is said that he came running on the water. And the first thing he said to his +disciples was, "Men of little faith, why are you crying? Don't you believe?" They were +scared. Jesus said, "If you believe, then come out of the boat and walk towards me." He +was standing on the water. They saw with their own eyes that he was standing on the +water, but still it was difficult to believe. They must have thought in their minds that it +was a trick, or it was maybe just an illusion, or this was not Jesus. Maybe it was just the +Devil, luring them or something. So they started looking at each other, "Who will walk?" +Then one disciple got out of the boat and walked. Really, he could walk. He couldn’t +believe his own eyes. He was walking on the water. + +When he came close to Jesus he said, "How? How is it happening?" Immediately the +whole miracle disappeared. The "How?" — and he was under water. Jesus pulled him out +and said, "Man of little faith, why do you ask how?" + +But reason asks "Why?" and "How?" Reason asks, reason questions. Faith is the +dropping of all questions. If you can drop all questions and believe, then this technique +can work miracles for you. + + +THE END. + + + +Chapter 74: The greater the sensitivity, the greater the detachment + + +The first question: + +Question 1 + +WITH DEEPENING MEDITATION, ONE BECOMES MORE AND MORE +SENSITIVE TO OBJECTS, EVENTS AND PERSONS. BUT DUE TO THIS +HEIGHTENED SENSITIVITY ONE FEELS A SORT OF DEEP INTIMACY WITH +EVERYTHING, AND THIS USUALLY BECOMES A CAUSE OF SUBTLE +ATTACHMENTS. HOW TO BE SENSITIVE AND YET DETACHED? + +How to be sensitive and yet detached? These two things are not contraries, they are not +opposites. If you are more sensitive, you will be detached; or, if you are detached, you +will become more and more sensitive. Sensitivity is not attachment, sensitivity is +awareness. Only an aware person can be sensitive. If you are not aware you will be +insensitive. When you are unconscious you are totally insensitive — the more +consciousness, the more sensitivity. A Buddha is totally sensitive, he has optimum +sensitivity, because he will feel and he will be aware to his total capacity. But when you +are sensitive and aware you will not be attached. You will be detached, because the very +phenomenon of awareness breaks the bridge, destroys the bridge, between you and +things, between you and persons, between you and the world. Unconsciousness, +unawareness, is the cause of attachment. + +If you are alert, the bridge suddenly disappears. When you are alert there is nothing to +relate you to the world. The world is there, you are there, but between the two the bridge +has disappeared. + +The bridge is made of your unconsciousness. So don’t think and feel that you become +attached because you are more sensitive. No. If you are more sensitive you will not be +attached. Attachment is a very gross quality, it is not subtle. + +For attachment you need not be aware and alert. There is no need. Even animals can be +attached very easily, rather, more easily. A dog is more attached to his master than any +man can be. The dog is completely unconscious so attachment happens. That is why in +the countries where human relationship has become poor, such as in the West, man goes +on seeking relationship with animals, with dogs, with other animals, because the human +relationship is no longer there. Human society is disappearing and every man feels +isolated, alienated, alone. The crowd is there but you are not related to it. You are alone +in the crowd and this aloneness scares. One becomes afraid and fearful. + +When you are related, attached to someone, and someone is attached to you, you feel you +are not alone in this world, in this strange world. Someone is with you. That feeling of +belonging gives you a sort of security. When human relationship becomes impossible +then men and women try to make relationships with animals. In the West they are very +deeply related to dogs and other animals, but here in the East, although you may be +worshipping cows you are not related to them. + +You may go on saying that you worship the cow as a divine animal, but your cruelty has +no end. + +In the East you are so cruel with your animals that the West cannot even conceive of how +you can go on thinking that you are non-violent. All over the world, particularly in the + + + +West, there are many societies to protect animals from the cruelty of men. You cannot +beat a dog in the West. If you beat it, it will be a criminal act and you will be punished +for it. What is happening really, is that human relationship is dissolving — but man +cannot live alone. He must have a relationship, a belonging, a feeling that someone is +with him. Animals can be very good friends because they get so attached; no one, no +man, can get that attached. + +For attachment, awareness is not necessary; rather, awareness is the barrier. The more +aware you become the less you will be attached, because the need for attachment +disappears. Why do you want to be attached to someone? Because alone you feel you are +not enough. You lack something. Something is incomplete in you. You are not a whole. +You need someone to complete you. Hence, attachment. If you are aware, you are +complete, you are a whole; the circle is now complete, nothing is lacking in you — you +don’t need anyone. You, alone, feel a total independence, a feeling of wholeness. + +That doesn’t mean that you will not love persons; rather, on the contrary, only you can +love. + +A person who is dependent on you cannot love you: he will hate you. A person who +needs you cannot love you. He will hate you because you become the bondage. He feels +that without you he cannot live, without you he cannot be happy, so you are the cause of +both his happiness and unhappiness. He cannot afford to lose you. This will give a +feeling of imprisonment: he is imprisoned by you and he will resent it, he will fight +against it. Persons hate and love together, but this love cannot be very deep. Only a +person who is aware can love, because he doesn’t need you. But then love has a totally +different dimension: it is not attachment, it is not dependence. He is not dependent on +you and he will not make you dependent on him; he will remain a freedom and he will +allow you to remain a freedom. Y ou will be two free agents, two total, whole beings, +meeting. That meeting will be a festivity, a celebration — not a dependence. That meeting +will be a fun, a play. + +That is why we have called Krishna’s life KRISHNA-LEELA, the play of Krishna. He +loves so many persons but there is no attachment. The same is not true on the part of the +GOPIS and the GOPALS, the friends and the girl friends of Krishna. The same is not +true. They have become attached, so when Krishna moves from Brindavan to Dwaraka, +they weep and cry and suffer. Their anguish is great because they think that Krishna has +forgotten them. + +He has not forgotten, but there is no pain because there was no dependence; he is as +whole and happy in Dwaraka as he was in Brindavan and his love is flowing as much in +Dwaraka as it was in Brindavan. The objects of love have changed but the source of love +remains the same. So whosoever comes near him receives the gift. And this gift is +unconditional: nothing is required as a return, nothing is asked as a return. + +When love comes through an aware consciousness it is just a pure gift with no condition, +and the person who is giving it is happy because he is giving it. The very act of giving is +his bliss, his ecstasy. + +So remember that if you feel that through meditation you have become more sensitive, +then automatically you will become less attached, more detached. Because you will be +more grounded in yourself, you will be more centered in yourself, you will not use +somebody else as your center. What does attachment mean? Attachment means that you +are using someone else as your center of being, Majanu is attached to Laila: he says he + + + +cannot live without Laila. That means the center of being has been transferred. If you say +that you cannot live without this or that, then your soul is not within you. Then you are +not existing as an independent unit, your center has moved somewhere else. + +This movement of the center from yourself to something else, to the other, is attachment. + +If you are sensitive, you will feel the other, but the other will not become the center of +your life. You will remain the center and out of this centering the other will receive many +gifts from you. But they will be gifts, they will not be bargains. You will simply give +because you have too much, you are an overflowing. And you will be thankful that the +other has received it. That will be enough and that will be the end. + +That is why I go on saying that the mind is a great deceiver. Y ou think that you are +meditating and that that is why you have become sensitive. Then the question of why you +get attached arises. If you get attached, that is a clear symptom that the sensitivity is not +because of awareness. Really, it is not sensitivity at all. It may be sentimentalism: that is +a totally different thing. You can be sentimental: you can cry and weep over small things, +you can be touched, and a storm can be created very easily within you — but that is +sentimentalism, not sensitivity. + +Let me tell you a story. Buddha was staying in a village. A woman came to him, weeping +and crying and screaming. Her child, her only child, had suddenly died. Because Buddha +was in the village, people said, "Don’t weep. Go to this man. People say he is infinite +compassion. If he wills it, the child can revive. So don’t weep. Go to this Buddha." The +woman came with the dead child, crying, weeping, and the whole village followed her — +the whole village was affected. + +Buddha's disciples were also affected; they started praying in their minds that Buddha +would have compassion. He must bless the child so that he will be revived, resurrected. +Many disciples of Buddha started weeping. The scene was so touching, deeply moving. +Everybody was still. Buddha remained silent. He looked at the dead child, then he looked +at the weeping, crying mother and he said to the mother, "Don’t weep, just do one thing +and your child will be alive again. Leave this dead child here, go back to the town, go to +every house and ask every family if someone has ever died in their family, in their house. +And if you can find a house where no one has ever died, then from them beg something +to be eaten, some bread, some rice, or anything — but from the house where no one has +ever died. And that bread or that rice will revive the child immediately. You go. Don't +waste time." + +The woman became happy. She felt that now the miracle was going to happen. She +touched Buddha’s feet and ran to the village which was not a very big one, very few +cottages, a few families. She moved from one family to another, asking. But every family +said, "This is impossible. There is not a single house — not only in this village but all +over the earth — there is not a single house where no one has ever died, where people +have not suffered death and the misery and the pain and the anguish that comes out of it." + + +By and by the woman realized that Buddha had been playing a trick. This was +impossible. But still the hope was there. She went on asking until she had gone around +the whole village. Her tears dried, her hope died, but suddenly she felt a new tranquility, +a serenity, coming to her. Now she realized that whosoever is bom will have to die. It is +only a question of years. Someone will die sooner, someone later, but death is inevitable + + + +She came back and touched Buddha’s feet again and said to him, "As people say, you +really do have a deep compassion for people." No one could understand what had +happened. Buddha initiated her into SANNYAS, she became a BHIKKHUNI, a +SANNYASIN. She was initiated. + +Anand asked Buddha, "You could have revived the boy. He was such a beautiful child +and the mother was in such anguish." But Buddha said, "Even if the child was +resurrected, he would have had to die. Death is inevitable." Anand said, "But you don’t +seem to be very sensitive to people, to their misery and anguish." Buddha replied, "I am +sensitive; you are sentimental. Just because you start weeping, do you think you are +sensitive? You are childish. You don't understand life. You are not aware of the +phenomenon." + +This is the difference between Christianity and Buddhism. Christ was reported to have +done many miracles of reviving people. When Lazarus was dead, Jesus touched him and +he came back to life. + +We in the East cannot conceive of Buddha touching a dead man and bringing him back to +life. To ordinary persons, to the ordinary mind, Jesus would look more loving and +compassionate than Buddha. But I say to you that Buddha is more sensitive, more +compassionate, because even if Lazarus was revived, it made no difference. He still had +to die. Finally Lazarus had to die. So this miracle was of no use, of no ultimate value. + +One cannot conceive of Buddha doing such a thing. + +Jesus had to because he was bringing something new, a new message to Israel. And the +message was so deep that people would not understand it so he had to create miracles +around it — because people can understand miracles but they cannot understand the deep +message, the esoteric message. They can understand miracles, so through miracles they +might become open and able to be receptive to the message. Jesus was carrying a +Buddhist message to a land which was not Buddhist; an Eastern message to a country +which had no tradition of enlightenment, of many Buddhas. + +We can conceive that Buddha was more sensitive than his disciples who were weeping +and crying. They were sentimental. + +Don’t misunderstand your sentimentality for sensitivity. Sentimentality is ordinary; +sensitivity is extraordinary. It happens through effort. It is an achievement. You have to +earn it. Sentimentality is not to be earned; you are bom with it. + +It is an animal inheritance which you already have in the cells of your body and your +mind. Sensitivity is a possibility. You don’t have it already. You can create it, you can +work for it — then it will happen to you. And whenever it happens, you will be detached. +Buddha was totally detached. The dead child was there but he didn’t seem to be affected +at all. The woman, the mother, was miserable and he was playing a trick on her. This man +seems to be cruel and this playing of a trick seems to be too much for a mother whose +child has died. He gave her a riddle, and he knew well that she would come back empty- +handed. But I say again that he has real compassion because he was helping this woman +to grow, to be mature. Unless you can understand death you are not mature; and unless +you can accept death, you don’t have a center within your being. When you accept death +as a reality, you have transcended it. + +Buddha used the situation. He was less concerned with the dead child and more +concerned with the alive mother because he knew that the dead child would come back to +life again — there was no need for the miracle. But if the child was revived the mother + + + +might have lost an opportunity. For lives together she might not again have a meeting +with a Buddha. So in the East only third-rate SADDHUS have been doing miracles; the +first-rate have never done any — they work on a higher level. + +Buddha is also doing a miracle but the miracle is being done on a very high level. The +mother is being transformed. + +But it is difficult to understand because our minds are gross and we only understand +sentimentality, we cannot understand sensitivity. Sensitivity means an alertness which +feels everything that happens around. And you can feel only when you are not attached. +Remember this: if you are attached you are no longer there to feel, you have moved out +of you. So if you want to know the truth about someone don’t ask his friends. They are +attached. And don’t ask his enemies. They are also attached, in the reverse order. Ask +someone who is neutral, neither a friend nor an enemy. Only he can say the truth. + +Friends cannot be believed, enemies cannot be believed; but we believe either the friends +or the enemies. Both are bound to be wrong because they don’t have a neutral witnessing, +they don’t have a detached view. They cannot stand aloof and look because they have an +investment in the person. Friends have an investment and enemies have an investment. +They see according to particular viewpoints, and with those viewpoints they are attached. +The moment you feel you are attached, you have taken a viewpoint. The totality is lost; +only a fragmentary thing is in your hands. And fragments are always lies because only +the whole is true. + +Meditate, become more sensitive, and take it as a criterion that you will go on becoming +more and more detached. + +If you feel that attachment is growing, then you are erring somewhere in your meditation. +These are the criteria. And to me, attachment cannot be destroyed and detachment cannot +be practised. You can only practise meditation — and detachment will follow as a +consequence, as a by-product. If meditation really flowers within you, you will have a +feeling of detachment. Then you can move anywhere and you will remain untouched, +unafraid. Then when you leave your body, you will leave it unscratched. Your +consciousness will be absolutely pure, nothing foreign has entered into it. When you are +attached, impurities enter into you. This is the basic impurity: that you are losing your +center and somebody else or something else is becoming your center of being. + +The second question: + +Question 2 + +IF FAITH CAN MOVE THE MOUNTAINS, WHY CAN YOU NOT HEAL YOUR +OWN BODY? + +I don’t have any body. + +This feeling that you have a body is absolutely wrong. The body belongs to the universe; +you don’t have it, it is not yours. So if the body is ill or if the body is healthy the universe +will take care of it. And a person who is in meditation should remain a witness, whether +the body is healthy or ill. + +The desire to be healthy is part of ignorance. The desire not to be ill is also part of +ignorance. And this is not a new question — this is one of the oldest questions. + +It has been asked of Buddha; it has been asked of Mahavir. Ever since there have been +enlightened persons, the unenlightened have always asked this question. + +Look... Jesus said faith can move mountains, but he died on the cross. He couldn’t move + + + +the cross. You or someone like you must have been present there waiting. The disciples +were waiting because they knew Jesus, and he had been saying again and again that faith +could move mountains. So they were waiting for some miracle to happen — and Jesus +simply died on the cross. But this was the miracle: he could be a witness to his own +death. And the moment of witnessing one's own death is the greatest moment of being +alive. + +Buddha died of food poisoning. He suffered for six months continuously. And there were +many disciples who were waiting for him to do a miracle. But he suffered silently and +died silently. He accepted death. There were disciples there who were trying to cure him, +many medicines were given to him. + +A great physician of those days, Jeevak, was Buddha’s personal physician. He used to +move with him wherever he went. Many times people must have asked, "Why does this +Jeevak go with you?" But it was Jeevak's own attachment. Jeevak was moving with +Buddha because of his own attachment, and the disciples who were trying to help +Buddha's body remain alive longer in this world, even if only for a few days more, were +also attached. + + +For Buddha himself, illness and health were the same. That doesn’t mean that illness will +not give pain. It will! Pain is a physical phenomenon, it will happen. But it will not +disturb the inner consciousness. The inner consciousness will remain undisturbed, it will +remain as balanced as ever. The body will suffer, but the inner being will remain just a +witness of the whole suffering. + +There will be no identification — and this I call the miracle. This is possible through faith. +And no mountain is bigger than identification — remember. The Himalayas are nothing; +your identification with your body is a greater mountain. The Himalayas may be moved +or not moved through faith, that is irrelevant, but your identification can be destroyed. + +But we cannot conceive of anything which we do not know, we can think only according +to our minds. We think according to where we are; the pattern remains the same. +Sometimes my body is ill, and people come to me and they say, "Why are you ill? Y ou +should not be ill; an enlightened person should not be ill." But who told you that it is so? + +I have never heard about any enlightened person who was not ill. Illness belongs to the +body. It has no concern with your consciousness or whether you are enlightened or not. +And sometimes it happens that enlightened persons are more ill than unenlightened ones. +There are reasons. + +... Now that they don’t belong to the body, they don’t co-operate with the body; deep +down they have broken themselves from the body. So the body remains but the +attachment and the bridge is broken. + +Many illnesses happen because of the separation that has happened. They are in the body +but their co-operation is no longer there. That is why we say an enlightened person will +never be born again — because now he cannot make any bridge with any body again. The +bridge is broken. While he is in the body, then too, really, he is dead. + +Buddha attained enlightenment when he was near about forty. He died when he was +eighty so he lived forty years more. On the day he was dying, Anand started crying and +said, "What will happen to us? Without you we will fall into darkness. You are dying and +we have not yet become enlightened. Our own light is not yet lit and you are dying. Do +not leave us!" + + + +Buddha is reported to have said, "What? What are you saying, Anand? I died forty years +before. This existence was just a phantom existence, a shadow existence. It was running +along somehow, but the force was not there. It was just a momentum from the past." + +If you are pedalling a bicycle, and then you stop and there is no pedalling, you are not +giving any co-operation to the cycle, it will go on moving for a little whole just because +of the momentum, the energy that you gave it in the past. + + +The moment someone becomes enlightened, the co-operation is broken. Now the body +will take its own course. It has a momentum. From many lives in the past, momentum has +been given to it. It has a life span of its own which will be completed, but now, because +the inner force is no longer with it, the body is prone to be more ill than ordinarily. +Ramakrishna died of cancer; Raman died of cancer. To the disciples it was a great shock, +but because of their ignorance they could not understand. + +One thing more has to be understood. When a person becomes enlightened, this is going +to be his last life. So all the past kannas and the whole continuum has to be fulfilled in +this life. The suffering — if he has anything to suffer — will become intense. For you there +is no hurry, your suffering will be spread out over many lives. But for a Raman this is the +last. All that is there from the past has to be completed. There will be an intensity of +everything, of all karmas. This life will become a condensed life. + +Sometimes it is possible — this is difficult to understand — to suffer in a single moment +the sufferings of many lives. In a single moment, the intensity becomes much because +time can be condensed or spread out. + +You know already that sometimes when you sleep you see a dream, and when you are +awake again you know that you have been asleep for only a few seconds. + +But you have seen such a long dream. It is possible that even a whole life can be seen in a +single dream. + +What has happened? In such a small period of time how could you see such a long +dream? There is not a single layer of time as we ordinarily understand — there are many +layers of time. Dream time has its own existence. Even while awake time goes on +changing. It may not change according to the clock because a clock is a mechanical +thing, but psychological time goes on changing. + +When you are happy, the time flows fast. When you are unhappy, the time slows down. A +single night can be eternity if you are in suffering, and a whole life can become a single +moment if you are happy and blissful. + +When a person becomes enlightened, everything has to be closed: this is a closing time. +Many millions of lives have to be closed and all the accounts have to be cleared, because +there will be no chance any more. After his enlightenment and enlightened person lives +in a different time altogether and whatsoever happens to him is qualitatively different. + +But he remains a witness. + +Mahavir died of stomach pain, something like an ulcer — for many years he suffered. His +disciples must have been in difficulty because they have created a story around it. They +could not understand why Mahavir should suffer, so they have created a story which +shows something about the disciples, not about Mahavir. + + +They say that a person who had a very evil spirit, Goshalak, was the cause of Mahavir's + + + +suffering. He threw his evil force on Mahavir and Mahavir absorbed it only because of +his compassion — and that is why he suffered. This shows nothing about Mahavir but +something about the difficulty of the disciples. They cannot conceive of Mahavir +suffering so they had to find a cause somewhere else. + +One day I was suffering from a cold — it is my constant companion. So somebody came +and he said, "You must have taken somebody else's cold." That doesn’t show anything +about me, it shows something about him. It is difficult for him to conceive of me +suffering. So he said, "You must have somebody else's cold." I tried to convince him, but +it is impossible to convince disciples. The more you try to convince them, the more they +believe that they are right. In the end he said to me, "Whatsoever you say I am not going +to listen. I know! You have taken somebody else's illness." + +What to do? The body's health and illness is its own affair. If you want to do something +about it, you are still attached to it. It will take its own course; you need not be much +worried about it. + +I am only a witness. The body is born, the body will die; only the witnessing will be +there. It will remain forever. Only witnessing is something absolutely eternal — +everything else goes on changing, everything else is a flux. + + +The third question: + +Question 3 + +LAST NIGHT YOU EXPLAINED IN DETAIL ABOUT HOW SEEKERS DECEIVE +THEMSELVES BY NOT MAKING EARNEST AND SINCERE EFFORTS TOWARD +MEDITATION. BUT WITH MANY OF THE SEEKERS WHO EARNESTLY ASK +YOU FOR MEDITATION TECHNIQUES, YOU SIMPLY SAY TO THEM TO LEAVE +EVERYTHING TO YOU AND THAT YOU WILL LOOK AFTER THEIR SPIRITUAL +PROGRESS. BUT MANY SEEKERS FEEL DISSATISFACTION ABOUT THEIR +SPIRITUAL TRANSFORMATION THAT WAY. IN THIS CASE, PLEASE EXPLAIN +HOW THESE SEEKERS ARE DECEIVING THEMSELVES. + +Firstly, when they ask for a technique, I give them a technique. This is a technique: +LEAVE EVERYTHING TO ME. This is one of the most powerful techniques possible. +And don’t think that it is easy; it is very difficult, sometimes impossible. It is difficult to +leave everything to somebody, but if you can, in that very surrender your ego has +disappeared; in that very surrender, your past has disappeared; in that very surrender a +new point is bom — you are different. Up to now you were living with your own ego; +from now onwards you will be living without the ego, you will be following a path of +surrender. + +So don't think that this is not a technique! It is a technique — one of the very basic +techniques. And I don't give it to any and everybody. I give it only to particular persons +who are very egoistic, because for them any technique will create trouble. + +Their ego will exploit it. They will become more egoistic through it. They can practise +anything else except this, but by that practise their ego is not going to be destroyed; +rather, it will be more fulfilled. They will become great 'meditators'. They can renounce +the world, but their ego will be strengthened whatsoever they do. Whenever I feel that +this seeker has such a subtle ego that any method will be poisonous to him, then only do I +say, "Leave everything to me." Not that this is going to be the end, but this is going to be +the beginning. And this is going to be the right beginning for all those who are ego- + + + +centered. If they can leave everything to me, then I will start giving them other +techniques — but only then. Then other techniques will not prove poisonous. Once the +ego is not there those techniques will transform them. And if their surrender is so total +that nothing is left to be transformed, then there will be no need for any other technique. +This too is possible, and this is possible only for those who are very egoistic; only they +can surrender totally. + +This will look confusing, paradoxical — but remember, you can leave something only if +you have it. If you don’t have a very strong ego, what can you leave? What can you +surrender? It is just like asking a beggar to surrender all his riches. He will be ready, he +will say, 'Okay,’ but his okay means nothing. + +It is absolutely futile because he has nothing to lose. And if you have a very strong ego, +that means a very concentrated ego, crystallized, you can leave it totally because it will +be difficult to leave it in parts. It is so concentrated and crystalized that it will be difficult +to leave it in fragments. Either you can leave it or not. It is one of the paradoxes of life +that for surrender a very authentic ego is needed to be there in the first place. So to me, a +right education will consist in creating strong egos, to the very extreme, where a great +suffering is bom out of them, and then — surrender. Only the is surrender possible. + +This has been my experience. Persons coming from the West have stronger egos than the +Eastern persons because in the West there is no concept of surrender, no concept of +obedience, no concept of gum and disciple. Really, the Western mind cannot conceive of +what a gum is. And they cannot conceive of someone surrendering to anybody. The +whole Western education, culture and civilization is based on ego, ego-fulfillment. And +Western psychologists say that to be mentally healthy, you must have a strong ego. So all +the Western psychologies help the ego to be strong: a child's ego must be strengthened in +every way otherwise he will become mentally ill. But Eastern religions say that unless +you leave the ego you cannot know the ultimate truth, you cannot know what life's +mystery is. + +Both seem to be contradictory, but they are not. To me, the Western training must be +there in the beginning with every person all over the world. Every person should be given +a strong ego. By the age of thirty-five you should reach to the peak of your ego; at the +age of thirty-five it should be at its peak, strong, as strong as possible. Only then will +surrendering happen. So whenever Western seekers come to me and I tell them to leave +things to me, they are very hesitant, resistant. And it seems impossible, but sometimes, +when surrender happens, they achieve a much deeper realization. + +With Eastern persons surrender is not very difficult. They are ready. You say, + +'Surrender,' they say, 'Yes.' There is not a single hesitation on their part. They don’t have +very strong, developed egos. They can surrender it — but that surrender is impotent. It +will not help. So it almost always happens that with the Eastern person I immediately +give him a technique to work on, so that it helps his ego. With Western persons I +immediately say, 'Surrender.' They have already reached that point within them so they +can surrender; their very hesitancy shows that they can surrender. But their surrender is +going to be a struggle, and when it is a struggle it is a SADHANA. When it is a struggle +it means something; it is going to transform them. + +So firstly, when I say, "leave everything to me," this is a technique; and I say it only to +persons who have very developed egos. + + + +Secondly... BUT MANY SEEKERS FEEL DISSATISFACTION ABOUT THEIR +SPIRITUAL TRANSFORMATION THAT WAY. Right, these are the people to whom I +say, 'Surrender.’ They feel very dissatisfied. They want something to do, they don’t want +to surrender. I know they will feel dissatisfied because their ego will resist; it will try in +every way not to surrender. But that cannot be helped. They will have to pass through +this dissatisfaction, and they will have to understand that leaving everything to me is just +the beginning. If they cannot do that, I am not going to give them any technique right +now. They can leave me, or leave everything to me. There is no other alternative. Once I +say to someone, "Leave everything to me," I am not going to give any technique to him. I +know that it will be difficult and arduous — but it has to be so. The more difficult, the +more arduous, the better, because that means he has a more evolved ego, and it is +struggling. He will have to come some day — to me or to someone else, it is irrelevant — +and he will have to surrender it. + +The master is not so relevant; the surrendering is relevant. Where you surrender is of no +significance. You can surrender to a stone Buddha. That will do. Surrendering transforms +you. It is putting your ego aside, unburdening yourself; living for the first time not out of +the past but moving into the present, fresh and young, unburdened. + + +And the third thing: IN THIS CASE, PLEASE EXPLAIN HOW THESE SEEKERS ARE +DECEIVING THEMSELVES. They can deceive themselves. They can say to me, "Yes, +we leave everything to you," and go on withholding everything. They can deceive +themselves that they have surrendered and they can go on insisting on their own ways. +Surrender cannot be partial, it can be only total — and then you cannot set your +conditions, your likes and dislikes. + +It happened just a few days ago. A man came to me and he said, "I will leave everything +to you. Whatsoever you say, I will do." I told him, "Repeat it again slowly, "Whatsoever +you say, I will do.’" He repeated it. I told him to repeat it again and go more slowly. He +became a little disturbed and said, 'Why?’ And he also became aware of why I was +saying go slowly. He said, "You may be right. I should not say this, because it is very +difficult to leave everything to you and it will be difficult to follow whatsoever you say." +So I told him to make it conditional, to be exact so that he could not change. He said, +"Right, Whatsoever I like — give me the freedom to choose." + +This is how you can deceive. Inside YOU remain the master; you go on choosing what to +do and what not to do. And as it happens, whatsoever you choose is going to be wrong +because the mind that is choosing is wrong, otherwise there would have been no need to +come to me. + +When I say surrender it means that now you will not choose, now I will choose and you +will follow. And if you can follow totally, the day is not far away when I will say, "Now +there is no need. Now you can choose." + +You must disappear: the surface, the superficial ego must disappear. Then your own +being comes into being. I am not going to keep you following me forever and ever. That +is not a very happy business. When your ego is no longer there, your own guru, the inside +master, has come into being. The outer guru is nothing but a representative of the inner +one. Once the inner is there, the outer is not needed. And your own guru will say to you, +"Now follow yourself. Move alone. Now you don’t need anybody to guide you, the inner +guide has come into being. Now you have your own inner light. You can see through it. It + + + +will show you the path." + +But right now, as you are, it is not possible. You don’t have any light. You cannot see. +And wherever your mind leads you it will be wrong. This mind has been leading you for +lives and it always leads you into particular patterns. It has old habits and it leads you +accordingly. It is a mechanical thing. Just to create a break, surrender is needed. If you +surrender to something, even for a few days, there will be a gap between now and your +past. A new force has entered within you. Now you cannot continue with the past; your +way, as it has always been, cannot be any more. + +A turning will happen. This gap is what is meant by surrender. + +But you can deceive. You can say, "Yes, I surrender," and you may not have surrendered. +Or you may think that you have surrendered but unconsciously you are fighting. Not only +in surrender, but in everything where a 'let-go' is needed, we fight. + +In the West much research is going on about the phenomenon of sex, because people are +becoming less and less capable of deep orgasms. They have sex but no ecstasy comes out +of it. It has become a boring affair. They feel only frustrated, only weakened through it. +And then it becomes a routine. They don’t know what to do. A deep ecstasy through the +orgasm is its significance. If it doesn’t happen it is futile and useless and even harmful. +Many schools of psychology go on working on the questions: "What has happened to +man? Why is he not achieving orgasm through sex? Why is there so much +dissatisfaction?" All the researches indicate that the reason is that man cannot surrender +— that is why he cannot achieve orgasm. Even while making love, while deep in sex, your +mind remains in control. You go on controlling. You are not in a 'let-go'. You are afraid +to let go because if you allow the sex energy to move uncontrolled you don’t know where +it will lead. You may go mad, you may even die. That is the fear. So you remain in +control. + +You go on manipulating your body. + +This manipulation from the mind doesn't allow the whole body to become a flow of +energy. Then sex becomes a local affair, the whole body is not involved, the whole body +is not in an inner dance; the ecstasy is missed. You lose energy and you don’t gain +anything — there is bound to be frustration. So psychologists say that you will not achieve +a deep ecstasy unless you are in a deep 'let-go', unless the mind is not there and the ego is +not there; unless the body has taken over with its own force, its own momentum, and is +moving by its own unconscious sources; unless YOU are not there. That ecstasy can give +you a first glimpse of the ultimate ecstasy that happens in a total 'let-go' of your ego with +the Divine, with the universe. + +Samadhi, the ultimate goal of all yoga and Tantra, is a deep orgasm with the universe +itself, with the existence itself. The guru is just trying to help you, to bring you to a point +where you can at least surrender the ego. Then a deep ecstasy will happen between you +and your master. Wherever there is a 'let-go', ecstasy happens — that is the law. + +So if you can surrender to a guru, don’t listen to anybody. Even if the whole world says +that this guru is wrong, don’t listen to it. If you can surrender, this guru is right. You will +achieve an ecstatic moment through him. And if the whole world says that this guru is +right, and you cannot surrender, he is useless for you. + +So wherever you have the feeling of surrendering, there is your guru, your master. + +Search for the place, search for the person in whose presence you can allow a 'let-go', in + + + +whose presence you can drop your mind even for a time. Once this force from the outside +enters into you, your path will be different, your life will have taken a new turning. + +You can deceive yourself: you can go on thinking that you have surrendered but you +know well inside that you have not surrendered. And remember: you cannot deceive a +master — he knows. And he will go on insisting unless the 'let-go’ really happens. You +can manoeuvre, you can play a game, but you cannot deceive a master. You can put your +head to his feet but that gesture means nothing. It may be just a superficial gesture, you +are not bowing down at all. But if bowing down really happens, the master can work. + +So whenever I say, "Surrender," or "Leave it to me and I will take care," I mean it. + +Exactly whatsoever I say I mean it. I want to create a gap within you, a discontinuity with +the past. Once the gap is there, you will sooner or later become capable of going on your +own. But before that, if you go on your own, you will continue the past story. Nothing +new is possible. For the new, something from the outside must enter you, must push you +onto a new path. + +The last question: + +Question 4 + +YOU SAID THAT JESUS DIDN’T KNOW THAT THE EARTH IS ROUND. + +SO FOR CHRISTIANS WHO BELIEVE THAT JESUS WAS GOD, THIS SEEMS +VERY STRANGE. ISN’T IT IMPLIED THAT AN ENLIGHTENED ONE LIKE JESUS, +WHO KNEW DEEP OCCULT SCIENCES, MUST ALSO KNOW MANY +ASTRONOMICAL AND ASTROLOGICAL FACTS ABOUT PLANETS, THE +UNIVERSE, AND THE INTER-RELATIONSHIP OF CELESTIAL BODIES? PLEASE +EXPLAIN. + +No, Jesus was not concerned. When Jesus said that the world was flat, he was using the +knowledge that was prevalent in those days. He was not concerned about whether the +world was round or flat; it was meaningless to him. He was more concerned about those +persons who were living on this 'flat' or 'round’ earth. + +The concern has to be understood. It is absolutely futile for Jesus to discuss these things. +What difference does it make? For example, you know from the geography books that the +world is round. If your geography books were teaching that the world is flat, as they were +teaching in the past, what difference will it make to you? Will you be a better man? Will +you be more meditative on a 'flat' world or on a 'round' earth? What difference will it +make to your being and the quality of your consciousness? It is irrelevant. + +Jesus was concerned with your consciousness, and he will not unnecessarily argue about +things which are useless. Only unenlightened persons are dragged into unnecessary +things. If you had told Jesus that the world was round, he would have said yes. + +It makes no difference to him because that was not his concern. The prevalent idea was +that the world was flat. And really, to the ordinary mind, the world is still flat. It looks +flat. The roundness is a scientific fact, but Jesus was not a scientist. + +For example, I know that it is a scientific fact that the sun never rises and never sets. The +earth is moving around, the sun is not moving. But still I sue the words 'sunset' and +'sunrise’. Sunrise is basically wrong. The very word is wrong, because the sun never +rises. Sunset is wrong, the sun never 'sets’. So after two thousand years, someone can say +that this man was unenlightened because he said 'the sun rises', 'sunrise', 'sunset'. Didn’t +he know these small things? + +But if I am to change every word then I will be fighting unnecessarily and that is not + + + +going to help anybody. Jesus simply used the prevalent knowledge — and the prevalent +idea was that the earth was flat. He was not concerned about it. If he were here today, he +would say that the earth is round. But even that is not exactly scientific, because the earth +is not exactly round. Now they say it is like an egg, not exactly round. The shape is like +an egg. But who knows? — the next day they may change and say that this is not so. +Science goes on changing, because as it becomes more accurate, as it attains to more +knowledge, as more facts are known, as more experiments are done, things change. + +But a person like Jesus or Buddha is not concerned about these facts. + +Remember one thing: science is concerned with facts, religion is concerned with truth. +Facts are not its concern, truth is its concern. Facts are about objects, truth is about you, +your consciousness. So every enlightened person has to use the prevalent knowledge +about facts. But you should not judge Jesus or Buddha by that — you are judging +wrongly. They can be judged only by what they have said about the truth, about the +intrinsic truth of human consciousness. About that they are always absolutely right +although their language differs. + +A Buddha speaks in one language, Jesus in a different one, Krishna in another. They use +different factual knowledge, they use different techniques, devices, but the central core of +their teaching is the same. And that, if you allow me to say it, is how to attain to total +awareness. + +Awareness is the basic teaching of all the enlightened ones. They use many parables, +techniques, devices, symbols, myths, but those are irrelevant. You can cut them away, +you can put them aside and just bring out the basic core. The basic core of all the +awakened persons is awareness. So Jesus goes on telling his disciples how to be more +awake — not to be sleeping, not to move in dreams, but to be alert, awake. + +He used to tell a parable. He said that it happened once that a great lord, a great master, a +very rich man, went on a far-away journey. + +He told his servants that they had to be always alert because he would be back any +moment, ANY moment. And whenever he came back, the house should be ready to +receive him. He could come back, any moment. The servants had to be alert, they +couldn’t even sleep. Even at night they had to be ready because the master could come +any moment. + +Jesus used to say that you have to be alert every moment because any moment the Divine +can descend into you. You may miss. If the Divine knocks at your door and you are fast +asleep, you will miss. You have to be alert. The guest can come at any moment, and the +guest is not going to inform you beforehand that he is coming. + +Jesus said just like the servants of that master, remain alert continuously, remain aware, +waiting, watchful because any moment the Divine can penetrate you. And if you are not +alert, he will come, knock and go back. And that moment may not repeated soon; no one +knows how many lives it may take before the Divine will again knock at your door. And +if you have become habitually asleep, you may have missed that knock many times +already and you may miss it again and again. + +Be alert. That is the basic core. All else is only to be used to reach it. So just because +Jesus says the earth is flat, he doesn’t become unenlightened. And just because you know +the earth is round, you don't become enlightened. It is not so easy! + + +THE END. + + + +Chapter 75: The search for the rhythm of the opposites + + +IMAGE SPIRIT SIMULTANEOUSLY WITHIN AND AROUND YOU UNTIL THE +ENTIRE UNIVERSE SPIRITUALIZES. + +WITH YOUR ENTIRE CONSCIOUSNESS IN THE VERY START OF DESIRE, OF +KNOWING, KNOW. + +O SHAKTI, EACH PARTICULAR PERCEPTION IS LIMITED, DISAPPEARING IN +OMNIPOTENCE. + +IN TRUTH FORMS ARE INSEPARATE. INSEPARATE ARE OMNIPRESENT +BEING AND YOUR OWN FORM. REALIZE EACH AS MADE OF THIS +CONSCIOUSNESS. + +One of the greatest poets, Walt Whitman, is reported to have said, "I contradict myself +because I am big, I contradict myself because I contain all the opposites, because I am +all." The same thing can be said about Shiva, about Tantra. + +Tantra is the search for the rhythm of opposites, of contradictions. Contradictory, +opposite standpoints become one in Tantra. This has to be deeply understood, only then +will you be able to understand why there are so many contradictory, different techniques. +Life is a rhythm between opposites: male and female, positive and negative, day and +night, birth and death. Between these opposites moves the river of life. The opposites are +the banks — they appear to be contradictory, but they are co-operative. The appearance is +false. Life cannot exist without this rhythm between the opposites. And life contains all. +Tantra is neither for this nor for that — Tantra is for all. Tantra has no standpoint of its +own really. All standpoints that are possible are contained in it. + +It is big. It can contradict itself because it contains all. It is not partial, it is the whole. +Hence it is holy. + +All partial standpoints are bound to be profane; they cannot be holy if they don't contain +the opposite. They may be logical and rational, but they cannot be alive. Wherever life +exists, it exists through its opposite. It cannot exist alone, the opposite is a must. + +In Greek mythology, two gods are at polar opposites: Apollo and Dionysius. Apollo is +the god of order, discipline, virtue, morality, culture, and Dionysius is the god of +disorder, chaos, freedom, nature. Both are polar opposites. Almost all religions are more +or less based on the Apollonian standpoint. They believe in reason, they believe in order, +they believe in virtue, they believe in discipline, control... really they believe in the ego. +But Tantra is basically different: it contains both. It contains the Dionysian standpoint +also. It believes in nature, it believes in chaos, it believes in laughing and dancing and +singing; it is not just serious, it is both. It is BOTH serious and non-serious. Nietzsche +writes in one of his letters, "I can believe only in a dancing god." He couldn’t find any +dancing god. Had he known something about Shiva then the story of his life would have +been totally different. Shiva is the dancing god. Nietzsche knew only about the Christian +god. That is the only standpoint — very serious. + +Sometimes the seriousness of the Christian god looks absurd, childish, because the +opposite is denied completely. You cannot conceive of a Christian god dancing. +Impossible! Dancing looks too earthly. And you cannot conceive of a Christian god +laughing — or can you? It is impossible. The Christian god cannot laugh. Laughter will + + + +look too worldly. The Christian god is the very spirit of seriousness and Nietzsche +couldn’t believe in it. + +And I think that no one can believe in such a god because it is half, it is not the whole. +Only persons like Billy Graham can believe in it. Somewhere Billy Graham says very +seriously that when you are reading sexy magazines you must remember that God is +looking at you. This looks foolish. You are reading a sexy magazine and God is reading +you reading the sexy magazines! This very attitude is stupid. It is stupid because it +doesn't contain the opposite. You will become stupid and dead if the opposite is denied. +But if you can move to the opposite easily with no contradiction, if you can be serious +and you can be laughing, if you can sit like a Buddha and you can dance like a Krishna +and there is no inherent opposition between these two — you can move from being a +Buddha towards being a Krishna easily and smoothly �� if you can do this, you will be +alive. And if you can do this you will be a Tantric, because Tantra is the basic search for +the rhythm which exists between the opposites, for the river which flows between the +opposites. + + +So Tantra goes on working on all and every technique possible. Tantra is not for +someone, it is for all. Every type of mind can move through Tantra. Every type of mind +cannot be Christian, every type of mind cannot be Hindu, every type of mind cannot be +Buddhist. A particular type of mind will be attracted by Buddha, a particular type by +Jesus, a particular type by Mohammed. Shiva contains all. Shiva can have an appeal for +every type possible. The total, the whole has been included, it is not a partial standpoint. +That is why Tantra has no sect. You cannot create a sect around the whole you can create +a sect only around a fragment. You can live the whole, but you cannot create a sect. A +sect can be created only when you are for something and against something else. If both +the opposites are contained, how can you create a sectarian mind? Tantra is the essential +religion, it is not a sect. Hence so many techniques. + +People keep on coming to me and asking, "There are so many techniques and one +technique contradicts the other?' Yes, it contradicts the other because it is not meant for a +particular mind. In these hundred and twelve techniques, all the types, all the possible +types of humanity have been included. Please don't be concerned with all the techniques, +otherwise you will get confused. You simply find that which suits you, that which +appeals to you. Towards it you will feel a deep affinity, an attraction; you will fall in love +with it. + +Then forget all the remaining one hundred and eleven techniques Forget them. You just +stick to the one that works for you. In these one hundred and twelve techniques, only one +technique is for you. If you try many techniques you will get confused, because to try so +many techniques you will need a very big mind which can absorb contradiction. That is +not possible right now. One day it may become possible. You can become so complete, +so total, that you can move easily with many techniques. Then there will be no problem. +But then there will also be no need! Right now is the need. Find your technique. + +I can be helpful to you in finding which technique will be suitable for you. And if you +feel that other techniques are contradictory to the technique that suits you, don't think +about them. They are contradictory. But they are not for you. At least they are not for you +now. One day it may become possible that when you don't have the ego within, you can +move to the opposite without any problem. The ego creates the problem. It is stuck + + + +somewhere, it clings to something, it is not liquid, it cannot flow. And Shiva is flowing in +all directions. + +So remember, don't start thinking about these techniques: that this technique is against +that. Shiva is not trying to create a system, he is not a system-maker. Shiva is giving all +the techniques without any systematizing. They cannot be systematized, because a system +means that the contradictory, the opposite, must be denied. + +And here the opposite is included. It is both Apollo and Dionysius; it is both serious and +laughing; it is both immanent and transcendent; it is both earthly and unearthly — because +it is all. + +Now we should enter the techniques: + +The first technique: + +IMAGINE SPIRIT SIMULTANEOUSLY WITHIN AND AROUND YOU UNTIL THE +ENTIRE UNIVERSE SPIRITUALIZES. + +First you must understand what imagination is. It is condemned very much nowadays. + +The moment you hear the word "imagine' you will say this is useless, we want something +real, not imaginary. But imagination is a reality, it is a capacity, it is a potentiality within +you. You can imagine. That shows that your being is capable of imagination. This +capacity is a reality. Through this imagination you can destroy or you can create yourself. +That depends on you. Imagination is very powerful. It is potential power. + +What is imagination? It is getting into an attitude so deeply that the very attitude becomes +reality. For example, you may have heard about a technique which is used in Tibet. They +call it heat yoga. The night is cold, snow is falling, and the Tibetan lama will be standing +naked under the open sky. The temperature is below zero. You would simply start dying, +you would freeze. But the lama is practicing a particular technique. That technique is that +he is imagining that his body is a burning fire and he is imagining that he is perspiring — +the heat is so much that he is perspiring. + +. And he actually starts perspiring although the temperature is below zero and even the +blood should freeze. He starts perspiring. What is happening? This perspiration is real, +his body is really hot — but this reality is created through imagination. + +You just try some simple technique so that you can feel how reality can be created +through imagination. Unless you feel it, you cannot work with this technique. Just count +your pulse. Sit in a closed room and count your pulse. And then for five minutes just +imagine that you are running. Imagine that you are running, it is hot, you are taking deep +breaths, you are perspiring, and your pulse rate is going high. After imagining this for +five minutes again count your pulse. You will see the difference: your pulse rate will be +high. You have worked it just by imagination, you were not really running. + +In old Tibet, Buddhist monks used to do exercise only through imagination. And those +techniques can be of much use for modern man, because it is difficult to run in the street, +difficult to have a long walk, difficult to find a lonely street. You can just lie down on the +floor in your room and imagine that for one hour continuously you are taking a long fast +walk. Just in imagination go on walking. And now even medical experts say that the +effect would be the same as if it were a real walk. Once you get in tune with your +imagination, the body starts functioning. + + + +You are already doing many things without knowing that it is your imagination working. +Many times you create many illnesses just through imagination; you imagine that now +this disease is there, infectious, it is all over the place. You have become receptive, now +there is every possibility that you will fall ill — and that illness is real. But it has been +created through imagination. Imagination is a force, an energy, and the mind moves +through it. And when the mind moves through it, the body follows. + +It happened once in a university hostel in the United States that four students were trying +an experiment in hypnosis. Hypnosis is nothing but imagination power. When you +hypnotize a person, he is really falling into deep imagination, and whatsoever you +suggest will start happening. So they suggested many things to a boy that they had +hypnotized. Four boys tried hypnosis on one. They tried many things and whatsoever +they said, the boy immediately followed. When they said, "Jump," the boy started +jumping. When they said, "Weep," the boy started weeping. When they said, "Tears are +flowing from your eyes," tears started flowing. Then just as a joke they said, "Now lie +down. You are dead!" And the boy lay down and he was dead. + +This happened in nineteen fifty-two. After that they made a law against hypnosis in the +United States. No one should try hypnosis unless some research work is involved; unless +some medical institute, or some psychological department of some university authorizes +you. + +Only then can you experiment. Otherwise it is dangerous — the boy simply believed, +imagined, that he was dead, and he was dead. + +If death can occur through imagination, why not life, why not more life? + +This technique is based on the power of imagination. IMAGINE SPIRIT +SIMULTANEOUSLY WITHIN AND AROUND YOU UNTIL THE ENTIRE +UNIVERSE SPIRITUALIZES. + +Just sit in a lonely place where no one will disturb you — a lonely secluded room will do. +Or if you can get somewhere outside it will be better, because when you are near nature +you are more imaginative. When there are only man-made things around you, you are +less imaginative. Nature is dreaming, and it gives you a dreaming force. Alone you +become more imaginative: that's why you are afraid when you are alone. It is not that +ghosts are going to trouble you, but alone your imagination can work. And your +imagination can create ghosts or anything you want it to. When you move alone, your +imagination is more potential; when someone else is there, your reason is in control +Because without reason you cannot be related to the others; to others goes on working. +When there is no one there, the mind goes on working. When there is no one there, the +mind relaxes and you regress to a deeper imaginative layer of the being. When you are +alone, imagination starts functioning. + +Many experiments have been done with sensory deprivation. + +If a person can be deprived of all sensory stimuli — if you are closed in a soundproof +room with no light entering it, no possibility of being related to any other human being, +no pictures on the walls, nothing in the room to which you can relate — after one, two or +three hours you will start relating to yourself. You will become imaginative. You will +start talking to yourself. You will question and you will answer. A monologue will start +in which you will be divided. Then suddenly you will start feeling many things which +you cannot understand. You will start hearing sounds, but the room is soundproof, no +sound can come in. Now you are imagining. You may start smelling perfumes, but no + + + +perfume is there. Now you are imagining. After thirty-six hours of sensory deprivation, +you cannot make any difference between what is real and what is imaginary — +impossible. After thirty-six hours of sensory deprivation, imagination becomes reality +and reality becomes illusory. + +That is why seekers in the old days would move to the mountains, to the lonely places, +where they could lose the distinction between the real and the unreal. Once the +distinction is lost, your imagination is in full force. Now you can use it and you can be +creative through it. + +For this technique sit in a lonely place: if the surrounding is natural, it is good, it not, then +a room can also do. Then close your eyes and imagine a spiritual force is felt within and +without. + +Within you a river of consciousness is flowing and it is going all over the room, +overflowing. Within and without, around you, everywhere, spirit is present, energy is +present. And don't only imagine it only in the mind, start feeling within the body — your +body will start vibrating. When you feel that the body has started vibrating, it shows that +the imagination has started functioning. Feel that the whole universe by and by is +spiritualized — everything, the walls of the room, the trees around you, everything has +become no-material, it has become spiritual. Matter is no more. + +That is the reality also. Physicists say that matter is illusory and energy is real, and +wherever you see solid things, that solidity is just an appearance, it is not there. As +physics enters deeper into the world of matter, matter disappears. Only energy, +immaterial energy, remains indefinable. + +Through imagination you are reaching to a point where, by your conscious effort, you are +destroying the structures of the intellect, the patterns of the intellect. You feel that there is +no matter, only energy, only spirit, within and without. Soon you will feel that within and +without have disappeared. When your body becomes spiritual and you feel it is energy, +then there is no distinction between the within and the without. The boundaries are lost. +Now there is only a flow, an ocean, vibrating. + +This is the real also — you are reaching to the real through imagination. + +What is imagination doing? Imagination is only destroying the old concepts, matter, old +patterns of the mind which go on looking at things in a certain way. Imagination is +destroying them. And then the reality will be revealed. + +IMAGINE SPIRIT SIMULTANEOUSLY WITHIN AND AROUND YOU UNTIL THE +ENTIRE UNIVERSE SPIRITUALIZES - until you feel that all distinctions have +disappeared, all boundaries have dissolved and the universe has become just an ocean of +energy. That is the fact, also. But the deeper you proceed in the technique, the more +scared you will become. You will feel as if you are going mad. Because your sanity +consists of distinctions, your sanity consists of this so-called reality and when the reality +starts disappearing, you will feel that simultaneously your sanity is disappearing. Saints +and insane persons move in a world which is beyond our so-called reality. They both +move, but the insane persons fall and saints go beyond. The difference is very small but it +is very great also. If without any effort on your part you lose your mind and the +distinctions, the real and the unreal, you will become insane. But if you destroy the +concepts with conscious effort, you will become "un-sane," not insane. That "un-sanity" +is the dimension of religion. It is beyond sanity. But conscious effort is needed. + + + +You should not be a victim, you should remain a master. When it is your effort which is +destroying the patterns of the mind, you look into the unpattemed reality. + +The unpatterned reality is the only reality; the patterned reality is just imposed. That's +why now anthropologists say that every society, every culture, looks at the same reality +but finds a different reality there, because their patterns, their concepts are different. + +There are many cultures in the world, primitive cultures. They look at the same world in +a very different way; their interpretation is totally different. The reality is the same for us +and for them, but the pattern looked through is different. For example, Buddhists say that +there is no substance in the world, the world is a process. There is nothing substantial. +Everything is in movement — or even that may not be the right thing to say. Movement is +the only thing. When we say that everything is in movement, again there is the old fallacy +— it is as if there is something which is moving. Buddha says there is nothing which is +moving — only movement is there. That is all that there is. So in a Buddhist country like +Thailand or Burma, they don't have any corresponding word for "is" in their languages. +When the Bible was translated into Thai for the first time, it became a problem to +translate it because in the Bible it is said that "God is." You cannot say that "God is" in +Burmese or in Thai; you cannot say it. + +Whatsoever they say will mean, "God is becoming." Everything is moving, nothing is. +When a Burmese looks at the world, he looks at movement. When we look, when +particularly the Greek-oriented Western mind looks, there is no process, only substance. +There are dead things, not movements. Even when you look at a river, you see the river +as "is." The river is not there — the river just means a movement, something which is +constantly becoming. And a point never comes where you say it has become, it is a +process without end. When we look at a tree, we see the tree "is". The Burmese language +has nothing to say. They can only say that the tree is becoming, the tree is flowing, the +tree is growing, the tree is in process. If the child is brought up with this pattern in the +mind — then everything is a process — the world, the reality, will be totally different. For +you it is different and the reality is one and the same. But what mind do you bring to it to +interpret it? Then it changes. + +Remember one basic thing: unless the pattern of your mind is thrown away, unless you +are "de-patterned", unless your conditioning is thrown away and you are deconditioned, +you will not know what reality is — you will know only interpretations. Those +interpretations are the workings of your own mind. Unpatterned reality is the only reality. +And this technique is to help you to unpattem, to decondition, to dissolve from the mind +the words which have gathered there. + +You cannot look because of them. Whatsoever looks real to you let it be dissolved. +Imagine energy, not substance, nothing static, but process, movement, rhythm, dance, +and go on imagining until the entire universe spiritualizes. If you persist, within three +months of intensively working for just one hour every day, you can move to this feeling. +Within three months you can have a different feeling of the whole existence around you. +Matter is no longer there, only immaterial, oceanic existence, just waves, vibrations. +When this happens then you know what God is. That ocean of energy is God. God is not +a person. God is not somewhere sitting on a throne in heaven. The whole creative energy +of existence is God. But we have a pattern of thinking. We say God is the creator. God is +not the creator. Rather, God is the creative force, the very creation itself. + +It has been forced again and again on our minds that somewhere in the past, God created + + + +the world — and then and there creation finished. Christians have a story that within six +days God created the world and on the seventh day he rested. That’s why the seventh day, +Sunday, is a holiday. God took a holiday on that day. In six days he created the world, +forever and ever — and since then there has been no creation. Since the sixth day there +has been no creation. This is a very dead concept. Tantra says God is the very creativity. + +Creation is not a historical event that happened somewhere in the past — it is happening +every moment, God is creating every moment. But again language creates a problem and +we say, "God is creating." It feels that God is someone who goes on creating. No, the +very creativity that goes on moving and moving every moment, that very creativity is +God. So you are in creation every moment. This is a very alive concept. It is not that God +has created something somewhere and since then there has been no dialogue between +man and God, there has been really no connection, no relationship — he created and the +thing was finished. Tantra says that every moment you are being created, eery moment +you are in deep relationship with the divine, with the source of creativity. This is a very +alive concept. + +Through this technique you will have glimpse of the creative force, within and without. +And once you can feel the creative force and the touch, the impact of it, you will become +totally different, you will never be the same again. God has entered you. You have +become an abode. + +The second technique: + +WITH YOUR ENTIRE CONSCIOUSNESS IN THE VERY START OF DESIRE, OF +KNOWING, KNOW. + +The basic thing about this technique is ENTIRE CONSCIOUSNESS. If you can bring +your entire consciousness to anything, it will become a transforming force. The +transfonnation happens whenever you are entire in it — in anything. + +But that is difficult, because wherever we are, we are only there in part, never in entirety. +You are here listening to me. This very listening can become a transfonnation. If you are +entirely here, this very moment here and now, if listening is your entirety, that listening +will become a meditation: you will enter a different realm of ecstasy, a separate reality. +But you are not entire. That is the problem with the human mind, it is always partial. A +part is listening. Other parts may be somewhere else, or may be asleep, or may be +thinking about what is being said, or arguing inside. That creates a division and division +is a dissipation of energy. So when doing anything bring your entire being to it. When +you are not holding anything back, not even a minor part is separate, when you have +taken a jump, total, whole, your whole being has come into it, then any act becomes +meditative. + +It is reported that one day Rinzai was working in his garden — Rinzai was a Zen master — +and somebody approached. The man had come to ask some philosophical questions. He +was a philosophical seeker. He didn’t know that the man who was working in the garden +was Rinzai himself. He thought he must be a gardener, a servant, so he asked, "Where is +Rinzai?" Rinzai said, "Rinzai is always here." Of course, the man thought that this +gardener seemed to be mad because he said that Rinzai was always here. + + +So he thought it would not be good to ask anything of this man again and he started + + + +moving off to ask someone else. Rinzai said, "Don’t go anywhere, because you will not +find him anywhere. He is always here." But he escaped from this madman. + +Then he inquired from others and they said, "The first man you met is Rinzai." So he +came back and said, "Forgive me, I am sorry, I thought you were mad. I have come to +inquire about something. I want to now what truth is. What should I do to know it?" +Rinzai said, "Do whatsoever you want to do, but do it entirely." + +The point is not what you do, that is irrelevant. The point is that you do it entirely. + +"For example," Rinzai said, "when I am digging this hole in the earth, my entirely is there +in the act of digging. There is no Rinzai left behind. The whole has gone into the digging. +Really there is no digger left, only the digging. If the digger is left, then you are +divided." + +You are listening to me. If the listener is left, then you are not entire. If there is only +listening and there is no listener left behind you are entire, here and now. Then this very +moment becomes a meditation. In this sutra Shiva says, WITH YOUR ENTIRE +CONSCIOUSNESS IN THE VERY START OF DESIRE, OF KNOWING, KNOW. If a +desire arises within you, Tantra doesn’t say to fight it. That is futile. No one can fight a +desire. It is foolish also, because whenever you start fighting with something within you, +you are fighting with yourself, you will become schizophrenic, your personality will be +split. + +And all these so-called religions have helped humanity to by and by become +schizophrenic. Everybody is split, everybody is divided and fighting with himself +because so-called religions have told you, "This is bad. Don’t do this." If the desire +comes, what to do? You go on fighting with the desire. Tantra says don’t fight the desire. +But that doesn’t mean that you become a victim of it. That doesn’t mean that you indulge +in it. Tantra gives you a very subtle technique. When desire arises, be alert just at the +beginning with your entirety. Look at it with your entirety. Become the look. Don’t leave +the looker behind. Bring your total consciousness to this arising desire. This is a very +subtle method, but wonderful. Miraculous are its effects. + +Three things have to be understood. Firstly, when desire has already arisen you cannot do +anything. Then it will take its full course, it will complete its circle, and you cannot do +anything. Just in the beginning something can be done — the seed should be burned then +and there. Once the seed has sprouted and the tree has started growing, it is difficult, +almost impossible, to do something. Whatsoever you do will create more anguish, +dissipation of energy, frustration, weakness. When the desire arises, just at the beginning, +just at the first glimpse, the first flicker that a desire is arising, bring your total +consciousness, the entirety of your being to look at it. + +Don't do anything. Nothing else is needed. With the entire being the look is so fiery that +the seed is burned, with no struggle, with no conflict, with no antagonism. Just a deep +look with the entire being and the arriving desire disappears completely. And when a +desire disappears without a fight, it leaves you so powerful, with such immense energy, +with such tremendous awareness, you cannot imagine it. If you fight, you will be +defeated. Even if you are not defeated and you defeat the desire, that too will amount to +the same thing. No energy will be left. You will feel frustrated whether you win or get +defeated. In both cases you will be weak in the end, because the desire was fighting with +your energy and you were fighting with the same energy. The energy was coming from +the same source, you were taking from the same source — so the source will be weakened + + + +whatsoever the result. But if the desire disappears just in the beginning, without any +conflict — remember, this is basic — without any fight, with just a look, not even an +antagonistic look, not even with a mind to destroy, with no enmity, just a total look, in +the intensity of that total look the seed is burnt. And when the desire, arising desire, +disappears, just like smoke in the sky, you are left with tremendous energy — that very +energy is bliss. That will give you a beauty of its own, a grace. + +The so-called saints who are fighting their desires are always ugly. + +When I say ugly, I mean they are always mean, fighting. Their whole personality +becomes graceless. And they are always weak, always lacking energy, because all their +energy is used up in the inner fight. A Buddha is totally different. And the grace that has +come to Buddha's personality is the grace of desires disappearing without any struggle or +fight, without any inner violence. + +WITH YOUR ENTIRE CONSCIOUSNESS IN THE VERY START OF DESIRE, OF +KNOWING, KNOW. In that very moment simply know, look, see. Don’t do anything. +Nothing else is needed. All that is needed is that your total being should be there present. +Your total presence is needed. This is one of the secrets of achieving the ultimate +enlightenment without any violence. And remember, you cannot enter into the kingdom +of God with violence. No, those doors shall never open for you, howsoever much you +knock. Knock and go on knocking. You may break your head but those doors will never +open. But for those who deep inside are non-violent and not fighting with anything, those +doors are always open, they were never closed. Jesus said, "Knock and the doors shall be +opened unto you." I say to you that there is no need even to knock. Look, the doors are +open. They have always been open. They were never closed. Just take a deep look, entire, +total, whole. + +The third technique: + +O SHAKTI, EACH PARTICULAR PERCEPTION IS LIMITED, DISAPPEARING IN +OMNIPOTENCE. + + +Whatsoever we see is limited, whatsoever we feel is limited, all perceptions are limited. +But if you can become aware, then every limited thing is disappearing into the unlimited. +Look at the sky. You will see a limited part of it, not because the sky is limited by +because your eyes are limited, your focus is limited. But if you can become aware that +this limitation is because of the focus, because of the eye, it is not the sky that is limited, +then you will see the boundaries melting into the unlimited. Otherwise existence is +unlimited, otherwise everything is melting into something else. Everything is losing its +boundary, every moment waves are disappearing into the ocean — and there is no end to +anything and there is no beginning. Everything is everything else also. + +Limitation is forced by us. It is because of us, because we cannot see the infinite, that we +divide it. We have done it in everything. You make a fence around your house and you +say, "This land belongs to me and beyond the fence is somebody else’s land." But deep +down your land and your neighbor's land are one. The fence is just because of you. The +land is not divided, the neighbors and you are divided — because of your mind. + +Nations are divided because of your mind. Somewhere India ends and Pakistan starts, but +just a few years back India was where Pakistan now is. At that time India used to + + + +continue up to the limits of Pakistan, the present day limits. + +But now Pakistan is divided, there is a barrier. But the land remains the same. + +I have heard a story that happened when India and Pakistan were divided. There was a +madhouse, a mad asylum, just on the boundary of India and Pakistan. The politicians +were not very worried about where the madhouse went, to Pakistan or to India, but the +superintendent was very worried. So he asked where the madhouse was going to be, +whether it was going to be in India or in Pakistan. Somebody from Delhi informed him +that he should ask the inmates, the madmen, and take a vote as to where they wanted to +go- + +The superintendent was the only man who was not insane and he tried to explain. He +gathered all the madmen together and told them, "Now it is up to you, wherever you want +you can go. If you want to go to India, you can go to India. If you want to go to Pakistan, +you can go to Pakistan." But the madmen said, "We want to remain here. We don’t want +to go anywhere." He tried and tried to explain. He said, "You will remain here. Don’t +worry about it. You will remain here, but where do you want to go?" Those madmen +said, "People say we are mad, but you look more mad. You say you will remain here, and +we will remain here, so why worry about going anywhere?" The superintendent was at a +loss as to how to explain the whole thing. + +There was only one way. He erected a wall, and divided the madhouse into two equal +parts. + +One part became India, another part became Pakistan. And it is reported that sometimes +madmen from the Pakistan madhouse came over the wall, and the madmen from India +they also jumped over the wall, and they're still much confused about what is happening. +"We are in the same place, and you have gone to Pakistan, and we have gone to India, +and no one has gone anywhere!" + +Those madmen are bound to be at a loss, they will never be able to understand, because +in Delhi and Karachi there are bigger madmen. + +We go on dividing. Life, existence, is not divided. All demarcations are man-made. They +are useful, if you don't go mad about them, and if you know that they are just artificial, +man-made, utilitarian, not real, not true, that they are just myths, that they help but they +don’t go any deeper. + +O SHAKTI, EACH PARTICULAR PERCEPTION IS LIMITED, DISAPPEARING IN +OMNIPOTENCE. So, whenever you see anything limited, always remember that beyond +the limit it is disappearing, the limitation is disappearing. Always look beyond and +beyond. + +This you can make a meditation. Just sit under a tree and look, and whatsoever comes +into your view, just go beyond, look beyond, and don't stop anywhere. Just find where +this tree is melting. This tree, this small tree just in your garden, has the whole of +existence in it. It is melting every moment. If the sun does not rise tomorrow this tree will +die, because this tree's life is bound together with the life of the sun. + +The distance between them is very long — for the sun-rays to reach earth takes time, ten +minutes' time. Ten minutes' time is very long, because light travels at a very fast speed, +tremendous. Light travels one hundred and eighty-six lahk miles in one second and it +takes ten minutes for light to reach this tree from the sun. The distance is tremendous, +vast. But if the sun is no longer there, the tree will immediately disappear. They exist + + + +together. The tree is melting every moment into the sun and the sun is melting into the +tree. Every moment the sun is entering into the tree, making it alive.... The other things is +as yet unknown to science, but religion says another thing is also happening — because in +life nothing can exist without response. If the sun is giving life to the tee, the tree must be +giving life back to the sun, because in life there is always a response. And energy +equalizes. The tree must be giving life to the sun. They are one. Then the tree has +disappeared, the limitation has disappeared. + +Wherever you look, look for the beyond and don’t stop anywhere. Go on and on and on, +until you lose your mind, until you lose all your limited patterns. Suddenly you will be +illumined. The whole existence is one. That oneness is the goal. And suddenly mind is +tired of pattern, limitation, boundary — and as you insist on going beyond, as you go on +pulling it beyond and beyond, the mind slips, suddenly it drops, and you look at existence +as a vast oneness, everything melting into each other, everything changing into the other. + + +O SHAKTI, EACH PARTICULAR PERCEPTION IS LIMITED, DISAPPEARING IN +OMNIPOTENCE. You can make a meditation out of it. Sit for one hour and work it out. +Don't create any limitation anywhere. Whatsoever the limitation just try to find the +beyond, and move and go on moving. Soon the mind becomes tired because mind cannot +cope with the unlimited. Only with the limited can it be related. With the unlimited, it +cannot be related: it gets bored, it gets tired, it says, "Enough, now stop!" But don’t stop, +go on moving. A moment will come when mind is left behind and only consciousness is +moving. In that moment you will have the illumination of oneness, of non-duality. That is +the goal. That is the highest peak of consciousness. And that is the greatest ecstasy +possible to human mind, and the deepest bliss. + +The fourth technique: + +IN TRUTH FORMS ARE INSEPARATE. INSEPARATE ARE OMNIPRESENT +BEING AND YOUR OWN FORM. REALIZE EACH AS MADE OF THIS +CONSCIOUSNESS. + +In truth fonns are inseparate. They appear separate, but every form is joined together +with other forms. Our reality is a co-existence. It is really an inter-reality, an inter- +subjectivity. For example, think of yourself alone on this earth. What will you be? The +whole of humanity has disappeared, you are left alone after a third world war, alone in +the world, alone on this big earth. Who will you be? + +The first thing is that it is impossible to conceive of yourself alone. + +It is impossible, I say, to conceive of yourself alone. You will try and try and you will see +that someone is just standing there — your wife, your children, your friends — because +you cannot exist alone, even in imagination. You exist with others. They give you +existence. They contribute. You contribute to them and they contribute to you. + +Who will you be? Will you be a good man or a bad man? Nothing can be said, because +goodness and badness exist in relation. Will you be beautiful or ugly? Nothing can be +said. Will you be man or woman? Nothing can be said, because whatsoever you are, you +are related to someone else. Will you be wise or foolish? By and by you will see that +every form has disappeared. And with these other forms, all forms within you have also +disappeared. You are neither foolish nor wise, neither good nor bad, neither ugly nor + + + +beautiful, neither man nor woman. Then what will you be? If you goon eliminating all +forms, soon you will realize that only nothing remains. We see forms as separate, but +they are not. Every form is linked with others. Forms exist in a pattern. + +This sutra says, IN TRUTH FORMS ARE INSEPARATE. INSEPARATE ARE +OMNIPRESENT BEING AND YOUR OWN FORM. Even your form and the form of +the whole existence is inseparate. You are one with it. You cannot be without it. And the +other thing is also true but difficult to conceive: the universe cannot be without you. + +The universe cannot be without you just as you cannot e without the universe. You have +been existing in many, many forms always and you will exist always in many, many +forms. But you will be there. You are an intrinsic part of this universe. You are not alien, +you are not a stranger to it, you are not an outsider. You are an insider, an intrinsic part. +And the universe cannot afford to lose you because if it loses you, it will lose itself. +Forms are not separate, they are inseparate. They are one. Only the appearance gives +demarcations and boundaries. This can become a realization if you ponder over it, +penetrate into it; it becomes a realization, not a doctrine, not a thought, but a realization +that, "Yes, I am one with the universe and the universe is one with me." + +This is what Jesus was saying to the Jews. But they felt offended because Jesus said, "I +and my father in heaven are one." Jews felt offended. What was he claiming? Was he +claiming that he and God are one? This was blasphemy. He must be punished. But he +was simply teaching a technique, nothing else. He was simply teaching a technique that +forms are not separate, that you and the whole are one — "I and my father in heaven are +one." But this was not a claim, this was just a suggested technique. And when Jesus said, +"I and my father are one," he didn’t mean that you and the father and the Divine are +separate. + +When he said 'I', every 'I' is represented. Whenever T exists, that 'I' and the Divine is +one. But it can be misunderstood, and both Jews and Christians misunderstood. Even +Christians misunderstood, because they say he was the only begotten son of God, the +only begotten son, so that no one else can claim that he also is a son of God. + +I was reading a very funny book. The title is THREE CHRISTS. In a madhouse, there +were three men, and all the three claimed that they were Christ. This is an actual fact not +a story. So one psychoanalyst studied all three. Then the thought came to his mind that it +would be very funny to introduce them to each other to see what would happen — how +they would introduce themselves and what their reaction would be. So he brought all +three together and left them in a room to introduce themselves. The first one said, "I am +the only begotten son, Jesus Christ." The other laughed and in his mind he thought he +must be mad! He said, "How can you be? I am Jesus Christ. You are also part of that +whole. A fragment of that consciousness is in you also. But Jesus Christ, the only son of +God — that I am." + +The third thought that both were foolish, that both had gone insane. He said, "What are +you talking about? Look at me. The son of God is here." + +Then the psychoanalyst asked them separately, "What is your reaction?" They all said, +"Both the others are mad. The other two have gone crazy." + +And this is not only the case with madmen, (f you ask Christians what they think about +Krishna, because he claims that he is God, they will say that there is only one, one +penetration of the beyond, and that is Jesus Christ. At only one time in history did God +penetrate into the world, and that was with Jesus Christ. Krishna is good, a great man but + + + +not Divine, not God himself. + +If you ask Hindus, they will laugh at Jesus. The same madness goes on, and the reality is +that everyone is the only begotten son of God — everyone. The otherwise is not possible. +You come from the same source, whether you are Jesus or Krishna or A, B, C, anybody +or anybody, you come from the same source. And every 'I', every consciousness, is +immediately related to the Divine. Jesus was giving only a technique. He was +misunderstood. + +This technique is the same. In truth fonns are inseparate. Inseparate are omnipresent +being and your own fonn. Realize each as made of this consciousness. Not only realize +that you are made of this consciousness, realize that everything around you is made of +this consciousness. Because it is very easy to realize that you are made of this +consciousness, it can give you a very egoistic feeling, it can be a deep fulfillment to the +ego. But realize that the other is also, then it become a humbleness. When everything is +Divine you cannot have any egoistic mind. + +When everything is Divine, you are humbled. Then there is no question of your being +somebody, or something above, then the whole of existence is Divine, and wherever you +look, you look at the Divine. The looker and the looked-at are both Divine because fonns +are not separate. Underneath all forms is hidden one formlessness. + + +THE END. + + + +Chapter 76: Buddha's inner orgasm + + +The first question: + +Question 1 + +WE HAVE ALWAYS HEARD THAT TANTRA IS BASICALLY CONCERNED +WITH SEX ENERGY AND SEX CENTER TECHNIQUES, BUT YOU SAY THAT +TANTRA IS ALL-INCLUSIVE. IF THERE IS ANY TRUTH IN THE FORMER +STANDPOINT, THE MAJORITY OF TECHNIQUES IN VIGYANA BHAIRAVA +SEEM TO BE NON-TANTRIC. IS THIS TRUE? + +The first thing is to understand sex energy. As you understand it, it is just a part, one part, +one fragment of the life force, but as Tantra understands it, it is just synonymous with +life. It is not a part, not a fragment — it is life itself. So when Tantra says "sex" energy it +means "life" energy. + +The same is true about Freudian concepts of sex energy. Freud was also very much +misunderstood in the West. It appeared to people that he was reducing life to sex, but he +was doing the same thing that Tantra has been doing for so long. Life is sex. The word +"sex" is not confined to reproduction, the whole play of life energy is sex. Reproduction +is just a part of that play. Wherever two energies are meeting — negative and positive — +sex has entered. + +It is difficult to understand. For example: you are listening to me. If you ask Freud, or if +you ask Tantra masters, they would say that listening is passive, feminine, and speaking +is male. Speaking is a penetration of you and you are receptive to it. Between a speaker +and a listener a sex act is happening because the speaker is trying to penetrate you and +the listener is receiving. + +The energy in the listener has become feminine, and if the listener has not become +feminine there will be no phenomenon of listening. That is why the listener has to be +totally passive. He should not think while listening because thinking will make him +active. He should not go on arguing within between argument will make him active. +While listening, he should be simply listening, not doing anything else. Only then can the +message penetrate and become illumined. But then the listener has become feminine. +Communication happens only when one party has become male and the other party has +become female, otherwise there can be no communication. Wherever negative and +positive meet, sex has happened. It may be on the physical plane — positive and negative +electricity meet and sex has happened. Wherever polarities meet, opposites meet, it is +sex. So sex is a very wide, a very spacious tenn, it is not concerned only with +reproduction. Reproduction is only one type of phenomenon which is included in sex. +Tantra says that when the ultimate bliss and ecstasy comes inside you, it means your own +positive and negative pole have come to a meeting — because every man is both man and +woman, and every women is both man and woman. You are bom not only from woman +or from man, you are born out of a meeting of the opposites. Your father has contributed, +your mother has contributed. You are half your mother and half your father and they both +co-exist within you. + +When they meet within, ecstasy happens. + +Buddha sitting under his Bodhi tree is in a deep inner orgasm. The inner forces have met, + + + +they have melted into each other. Now there will be no need to seek a woman outside +because the meeting has happened with the inner woman. And Buddha is non-attached to, +or detached from, woman outside, not because he is against woman, but because the +ultimate phenomenon has happened within. Now there is no need. An inner circle has +become whole, now it is complete. That is why such grace comes to Buddha's face. It is +the grace of being complete. Now nothing is lacking, a deep fulfillment has happened, +now there is no further journey. He has achieved the ultimate destiny. The inner forces +have come to a meeting and now there is no conflict. But it is a sexual phenomenon. +Meditation is a sexual phenomenon, that is why Tantra is said to be sex-based, sex- +oriented — and all these hundred and twelve techniques are sexual. + +Really, no meditative technique can be non-sexual. But you have to understand the +wideness of the tenn "sex". If you don’t understand you will be confused, and +misunderstanding will follow. + +So whenever Tantra says "sex-energy" it means the "elan-vital", the life-energy itself. +They are synonymous. Whatsoever we call sex is just one dimension of life-energy. + +There are other dimensions. And really it should be so. + +You see a seed sprouting, somewhere flowers are coming on a tree, the birds are singing +— the whole phenomenon is sexual. It is life manifesting itself in many ways. When the +bird is singing it is a sexual call, an invitation. When the flower is attracting butterflies +and bees it is an invitation, because the bees and butterflies will carry the seeds of +reproduction. Stars are moving in space.... No one has yet worked on it but it is one of the +oldest Tantra concepts that there are male planets and female planets — otherwise there +would be no movement. It must be so because the polarity is needed, the opposite is +needed to create magnetism, to create attraction. Planets must be male and female. +Everything must be divided into these two polarities. And life is a rhythm between these +two opposites. Repulsion and attraction, coming nearer and going far... these are the +rhythms. + +Tantra uses the word "sex" wherever the opposites meet. It is a sexual phenomenon. And +how to make your inner opposites meet, is the whole purpose of meditation. So all these +hundred and twelve methods are sexual. There cannot be anything else, there is no +possibility. But try to understand the wideness of the term "sex". + +The second question: + +Question 2 + +YOU SAID THAT EXISTENCE IS A WHOLENESS, THAT EVERYTHING IS +RELATED, THAT THINGS ARE MELTING INTO EACH OTHER, THAT THE TREE +CANNOT BE WITHOUT THE SUN AND THE SUN ALSO CANNOT EXIST +WITHOUT THE TREE. + +IN REFERENCE TO THE ABOVE, PLEASE EXPLAIN HOW IGNORANCE AND +ENLIGHTENMENT ARE RELATED TO EACH OTHER. + +They are related. Enlightenment and ignorance are two polar opposites. Enlightenment +can exist only because there is ignorance. If ignorance disappeared from the world, +enlightenment would disappear simultaneously. But because of our dualistic thinking we +always think that opposites are opposites. They are complementary, they are not really +opposite. They are complementary because one cannot exist without the other. So they +are not enemies. Birth and death are not enemies because death cannot exist if there is no + + + +birth. Birth creates the base for death to exist but if there were no death, birth could not +exist. + +Death creates the base — so whenever someone is dying, someone else is being born. At +one point there is death, at the next point immediately there is birth. They look opposite, +they work in opposition as far as the surface is concerned, but deep down they are friends +helping each other. It is easy to understand about ignorance and enlightenment because +we think that when a man becomes enlightened, ignorance has disappeared completely. +This is the ordinary standpoint about enlightenment — that ignorance has disappeared +completely. No. That is not right. Rather, on the contrary, when a person becomes +enlightened, enlightenment and ignorance have both disappeared. + +Because if one is there the other is bound to be there; one cannot exist without the other. +They exist together or they disappear together. They are aspects of one thing, two faces +of one coin. You cannot make one face of the coin disappear and retain the other. + +So when a person becomes a Buddha, really, at that moment both have disappeared — +ignorance and enlightenment both. Just consciousness is left, pure being is left, and the +conflicting, opposing, helping opposites have disappeared. That is why when Buddha is +asked what happens to an enlightened man, he remains silent many times. He says, + +"Don't ask this because whatsoever I say will be untrue. Whatsoever I say will be untrue. +If I say that he has become silent it means the opposite of silence must exist there, +otherwise how can you feel silence? If I say he has become blissful, then anguish must +exist side by side. How can you feel bliss without anguish?" Buddha says, "Whatsoever I +say will be untrue." So he remains consistently silent about the state of an enlightened +person, because all our terms are dual. If you say light, and if someone insists, "Define +it," how are you going to define it? You will have to bring darkness in, only then can you +define it. You will say that light is where darkness is not — or something like that. + +One of the greatest thinkers of the world, Voltaire, used to say that you can communicate +only if you define your terms first. + +But that is impossible. If you have to define light, you will have to bring darkness in. And +then if it is asked what darkness is, you will have to define it by light, which is undefined. +All definitions are circular. They used to say, "What is mind?" and the definition was, +"Not matter." And, "What is matter?" and the definition was, "Not mind." Both terms are +undefined and you are playing a trick with yourself. You define one term by another term +which itself needs definition. The whole language is circular and the opposite is +necessary. + +So Buddha says, "I will not even say that the enlightened person exists." Because +existence is possible only if non-existence is also present. So, he will not even say that +you exist after enlightenment, because existence has to be defined by non-existence. +Nothing can be said then because all language consists of the polar opposite. That is why +in the Upanishads it is said that if someone says that he is enlightened, know well that he +is not. Because how can he feel that he is enlightened? Some ignorance must have +remained because a contrast is needed. + +If you write on a blackboard with white chalk — the blacker the board the whiter will be +the writing. You cannot write on a white board with white chalk. If you do, there will be +no writing. The contrast is needed. If you feel that you are enlightened that shows that the +blackboard is right there — only then could you feel it. + + + +If the blackboard has really disappeared, the writing would have also disappeared. It +happens simultaneously. So a Buddha is neither ignorant nor wise, he simply is. You +cannot put him on any pole of any duality. Both the poles have disappeared. + +When they disappear how does it happen? When both poles meet they negate each other +and disappear. In another way you can say Buddha is both the most ignorant person and +the most enlightened. The polarity has come to its extreme point, there has been a +meeting, and the meeting has cancelled both. The minus and plus have come together. +Now there is neither minus nor plus, because they cancel each other. The minus has +cancelled the plus and the plus has cancelled the minus, they have both disappeared and a +pure being, an innocent being is left. You cannot say it is wise, you cannot say it is +ignorant — or, you can say it is both. + +Enlightenment means the point from where you take a jump into the non-dual. Before +that point is duality. Everything is divided. + +Someone asked Buddha, "Who are you?" He laughed and said, "It is difficult to say." But +the man insisted. He said something can be said because you are. Something meaningful +can be asserted because you are. But Buddha said, "Nothing can be said. I am, but even +to say this leads me into untruth." Then the man took another route. He asked "Are you a +man or a woman?" Buddha said, "It is difficult to say. + +Once I was a man, but then my whole being was attracted towards women. When I was a +man, my mind was filled with women, and when women disappeared from my mind, my +man also disappeared with them. Now I cannot say. I don’t know who I am and it is +difficult to define." + +When duality is no more, nothing can be defined. So if you are aware that you have +become wise it means that foolishness persists. If you think that you have become +blissful, it means that you are still in the world, in the realm of anguish. If you say that +you feel a very deep well-being, a health, that means that disease is still possible. The +opposite will follow you; if you carry one the other will follow. You have to drop both. +And the dropping happens when both meet. So the basic science of all religion is how to +allow your inner opposites to meet so that they disappear and not a trace is left. You will +disappear with the disappearance of the opposite. You as you are will no longer be there +and something totally new and unknown, something unimaginable, will come into being. +That something is called Brahma, you can call it God. Buddha prefers the term "nirvana". +The word "nirvana" simply means cessation of all that was, total cessation of the past. +And you cannot use your past experience and knowledge to define this new. This new is +indefinable. + +Ignorance and enlightenment are also part of duality. + +For us Buddha looks enlightened because we are in ignorance. For Buddha himself he is +neither. It is impossible for him to think in tenns of duality. + +The third question: + +Question 3 + +WILL YOU PLEASE TELL US WHY KRISHNAMURTI IS AGAINST +TECHNIQUES, WHEREAS SHIVA IS FOR SO MANY TECHNIQUES. + +Being against techniques is simply a technique. Not only Krishnamurti is using that +technique, it has been used many times before. It is one of the oldest techniques, nothing +is new about it. + + + +Two thousand years ago Bodhidhanna used it. He introduced into China what is now +known as Chan or Zen-Buddhism. He was a Hindu monk, a monk from India. He +believed in no-technique. Zen is based on no-technique. Zen masters say that if you do +something you will miss, because who will do? You? You are the disease, and out of you +nothing else can be born. Who will make the effort? Your mind, and your mind has to be +destroyed — and you cannot destroy the mind itself with help from the mind. Whatsoever +you do, your mind will be more strengthened. + +So Zen says there is no technique, no method, there is no scripture and there can be no +guru. But the beauty is that Zen has created the greatest of gurus and Zen masters have +written the best scriptures in the world. And through Zen thousands and thousands of +people attained nirvana — but they say there is no technique. + + +So it has to be understood that no-technique is really one of the foundational techniques. +The emphasis is on "no" so that your mind is negated. Mind can have two attitudes — yes +or no. These are the two possibilities, the two alternatives, just as they are in everything. +No is the feminine and yes is the male. So you can use the method of no, or you can use +the method of yes. If you follow the method of yes, then there are many methods — but +you have to say yes and there can be many yes's. If you follow no, then there are not +many methods, only one, because there cannot be many no's. + +Look at this point: there are so many religions in the world, so many types of theists. +There are at least three hundred religions in existence right now. So theism has three +hundred temples, churches, scriptures. But there is only one type of atheism, there cannot +be two. Atheists have no sects. When you say there is no God, the thing is finished. You +cannot differentiate between two no's, you cannot make any difference. But when you +say, "Yes there is God," then there is a possibility of difference. Because my yes will +create my own God and your yes will create your own God. Your yes may be said to +Jesus, my yes may be said to Krishna — but when you say no, then all no's are similar. +That is why on the earth there are no sects in atheism. + +Atheists are all alike. They don’t have any scripture, they don't have any church. + +When they don’t have any positive attitude there is nothing to differ about, a simple no is +enough. The same has happened about techniques: no has only one technique, yes has +one hundred and twelve, or many more even are possible. You can create new +combinations. + +Someone has said that the method I teach, the dynamic method of meditation, is not +included in these one hundred and twelve methods. It is not included because it is a new +combination, but all that is in it is there in the hundred and twelve methods. Some parts +are in one technique, some other part is in some other technique. These hundred and +twelve are the basic methods. You can create thousands out of them. There is no end to it. +Any number of combinations is possible. + +But those who ay there is no method can have only one method. You cannot create much +out of no. So Bodhidhanna, Lin Chi, Bokuju, Krishnamurti, have only one method. + +Really Krishnamurti comes just after a succession of Zen masters. He is talking Zen. +Nothing is new about it. But Zen always looks new, and the reason is because Zen doesn't +believe in scriptures, doesn’t believe in tradition, doesn’t believe in techniques. + +So whenever no arises again it is fresh and new. Yes believes in tradition, in scriptures, in +masters. Whenever yes is there, it will have a long beginningless tradition. Those who + + + +have said yes, Krishna or Mahavir, they go on saying that they are not saying anything +new. + +Mahavir says, "Before me twenty-three TEERTHANKARAS have taught the same." And +Krishna says, "Before me, this seer gave this message to that seer, that seer gave the +message to that and it has been coming down. I am not saying anything new." + +Yes will always be old, eternal. No will always look new, as if it has suddenly come into +being. No cannot have traditional roots. It is unrooted. That is why Krishnamurti looks +new. He is not. + +What is this technique of "denying technique"? It can be used. It is one of the subtlest +ways to kill and destroy the mind. Mind tries to cling to something that is a support; mind +needs support to be there, it cannot exist in a vacuum. So it creates many types of +supports — churches, scriptures, Bible, Koran, Gita — then it is happy, there is something +to cling to. But then with this clinging the mind remains. + +This technique of no-technique insists on destroying all supports. So it will insist that +there is no scripture. No Bible can be of help because the Bible is nothing but words; no +Gita can be of any help because whatsoever you come to know through Gita will be +borrowed, and truth cannot be borrowed. No tradition is of any help because truth has to +be achieved authentically, individually. You have to come to it, it cannot be transferred to +you. No master can give it to you because it is not something like property. It is not +transferable, it cannot be taught because it is not infonnation. + +If a master teaches you, you can leam only words, concepts, doctrines. No master can +make you a realized one. That realization has to happen to you and it has to happen +without any help. If it happens through some help then it is dependent and then it cannot +lead you to ultimate freedom, to MOKSHA. + +These are the parts of this no-technique. Through these criticisms, negations and +arguments, supports are destroyed. Then you are left alone with no guru, no scripture, no +tradition, no church, nowhere to move, nowhere to go, nowhere to be dependent. You are +left in a vacuum. And really, if you can conceive of this vacuum and are ready to be in it, +you will be transformed. But mind is very cunning. If Krishnamurti says to you that these +are things — no support, no clinging, no master, no scripture, no technique — you will +cling to Krishnamurti. There are many clinging to him. The mind has again created a +support and then the whole point is lost. + +Many people come to me and they say, "Our minds are in anguish. How to come to the +inner peace, how to attain the inner silence?" And if I give them some technique they say, +"But techniques cannot help because we have been listening to Krishnamurti." Then I ask +them, "Then why have you come to me? And what do you mean when you ask, 'How to +attain silence?’ You are asking for a technique and you are still going to listen to +Krishnamurti. + +Why? If there is no master and if the real cannot be taught, then why are you going on +listening to him? He cannot teach you anything. But you go on listening to him and you +are being aught. And you have now started to cling to this no-technique. So whenever +someone gives you technique, you will say, 'No, we don’t believe in techniques.’ And you +are still not silent. So what has happened? Where have you missed the train? If you really +need no-technique, if you don’t have any technique — you must have attained. But you +have not attained." + + + +The basic point has been missed; the basic point is that for this no-technique technique to +work you must destroy all support, you must not cling to anything. And it is very +arduous. It is almost impossible. That is why so many people for these last forty years +have been listening to Krishnamurti but nothing has happened to them. It is so arduous +and difficult, almost impossible to remain unsupported, to remain totally alone and to be +alert that the mind is not allowed to create any support. Because mind is very cunning, it +can create subtle supports again and again. You may throw away Gita, but then you fill +the space with Krishnamurti's books. You may laugh at Mohammed, you may laugh at +Mahavir, but if someone laughs at Krishnamurti you get angry. Again in a roundabout +way you have created a support, you are clinging. + +Non-clinging is the secret of this method. + +If you can do it, it is good; if you cannot do it, then don't deceive. Then there are +methods. Use them! Then be clear that you cannot be alone so you will take someone’s +help. Help is possible. Through help also, transformation is possible. + +These are the opposites — no and yes, these are opposites. You can move from either but +you must decide about your own mind and its working. If you feel that you can be +alone.... + +Once it happened that when I was staying in a village a man came and he said to me, "I +am confused. My family is trying to arrange a marriage for me." He was a young man, +just fresh from university. He said, "I don’t want to be involved in all that. I want to +become a SANNYASIN, I want to renounce all. So what is your advice?" I told him, "I +never went to ask anybody, but you have come to take my advice. When you have come +to take advice it shows that you need support, that you need. It will be difficult for you to +live without a wife. That too is a support," + +You cannot live without a wife, you cannot live without your husband, but you think you +can live without a guru? Impossible! Your mind needs support in every way. Why do you +go to Krishnamurti? You go to learn, you go to be taught, you go to borrow knowledge. +Otherwise there is no need. Many times it has happened that friends will say, "It would +be good if you and Krishnamurti meet." + +So I tell them, "You go and ask Krishnamurti and if he wants to meet, I will come. But +what is going to be there? What will we do? What will we talk about? We can remain +silent. What is the need? But they say, "It would be good if you both meet. It would be +good for us. We will be happy to listen to what you say." + +So I tell them a story. + +Once it happened that a Mohammedan mystic, Farid, was traveling. When they came +near the village of Kabir, another mystic, the followers of Farid said that it would be very +good if they both meet. And when it became known to Kabir's disciples, they also +insisted that, As Farid was passing, they should invite him in. So Kabir said, "It is okay." +Farid also said, "It is okay. We will go, but don't say anything when I enter Kabir's hut, +remain quite silent." + +For two days Farid stayed in Kabir's hut. There was total silence. They sat silently for +two days and then Kabir came to the edge of his village to give a send-off to Farid — and +in silence they departed. The moment they departed the followers of both started asking. +The followers of Kabir asked him, "What was this? It became a boredom. You were +sitting silently for two days, not even a single word was spoken, and we were so eager to +hear." Farid’s followers also said, "What was this? It seems weird. For two days + + + +continuously we were watching and watching and waiting and waiting for something to +come out of this meeting. + + +But nothing came out." + +Farid is reported to have said, "What do you mean? Two persons who know, cannot talk; +two persons who don't know, can talk much, but it is useless, even harmful. The only +possibility is one person who knows, talking to one who doesn’t know" And Kabir +said, "Whoever uttered a single word would have proved that he didn’t know." + +You go on asking for advice, you go on searching for supports. Realize it will that if you +cannot remain without support, then it is good to find a support, a guide, knowingly. If +you think that there is no need, that you are enough unto yourself, then stop seeking +Krishnamurti or anybody. Stop going and remain alone. + +It has happened also to persons who were alone but the phenomenon is very rare. +Sometimes to one person in millions it happens — and that too is not without any cause. +That person may have been seeking for many lives; he may have been finding many +supports, many masters, many guides, and now a point has come where he can be alone. +Only then it happens. But whenever it happens to a person, that he achieves the ultimate +alone, he starts saying that it can happen to you also. It is natural. + +Because it happened to Krishnamurti alone, he goes on saying that it can happen to you. + +It cannot happen to you! You are in search of support and that shows that alone you +cannot do it. So don’t be deceived by yourself! Your ego may feel good that, "I don’t need +any support!" Ego always thinks in terms of, "I alone am enough," but that ego will not +help. + +That will become the greatest barrier possible. No-technique is a technique but only for +very specific people; for those who have struggled in many lives and have now come to a +point where they can be alone, that technique is a help. And if you are that type of +person, I know well you will not be here. So I am not worried about that person, he will +not be here. He cannot be here. Not only here, he cannot be anywhere with any master, +listening, seeking, searching, practicing. He will not be found anywhere. So we can leave +him, we need not discuss him. + +These techniques are for you. So this is how I will conclude. Krishnamurti is talking for +the person who cannot be there and I am talking for persons who are here. Whatsoever +Krishnamurti is saying is absolutely right but the persons to whom he is saying it are +absolutely wrong. The person who can be alone, who without any method, any support, +any scripture, any guru, can reach, is not going to listen to Krishnamurti because there is +no need, there is no meaning. And those who are going to listen, they are not of that type, +they will be in deep difficulty — and they are. They need support and their mind goes on +thinking that there is no need for support. They need a guru and their mind goes on +saying that the guru is a barrier. They need techniques and logically they have concluded +that techniques cannot help. They are in deep trouble, but the trouble is created by +themselves. + + +Before you start doing something you must try to understand what type of mind you have +got, because ultimately the guru is not meaningful, ultimately our mind is meaningful. +The ultimate decision is going to come through your mind, the destiny is to be fulfilled +through your mind — so understand it, without any ego confusing you. Just understand if + + + +you need support, guidance, techniques, methods to work with. If you need them, find +them. If you don’t need them, there is no question: be alone, unclinging, move alone, +unclinging. The same will happen through both ways. + +Yes and no are two opposites and you have to find out what your path is. + +The last question: + +Question 4 + +YOU SAID THAT SHIVA IS NOT A SYSTEM-MAKER AND SECTS CANNOT +FORM AROUND HIS TEACHINGS. BUT PERSONS LIKE BUDDHA, MAHAVIR, +JESUS, GURDJIEFF, SEEM TO BE GREAT SYSTEM-MAKERS. WHY DO THEY +HAVE TO BE SYSTEM-MAKERS? PLEASE EXPLAIN THE PRO’S AND CON’S OF +SYSTEM-MAKING. ARE YOU A MULTI-SYSTEM-MAKER? + +There are two possibilities: you can create a system to help people, create multi-systems +to help people, or the other, you can try to destroy systems to help people. Again the yes +and no. Again the polar opposites. And in both ways you can help people. + +Bodhidharma is a system-destroyer, Krishnamurti is a system-destroyer, the whole +tradition of Zen is system-destroying. + +Mahavir, Mohammed, Jesus, Gurdjieff, are great system-makers. The problems is always +that we cannot understand these two contradictory things simultaneously together: we +think that either one can be right but both cannot be. If system-makers are right, then our +mind says that system-destroyers must be wrong. Or if the system-destroyers are right, +then system-makers must be wrong. No, both are right. + +A system means a pattern to follow, a clear-cut map to follow so that no doubt arises, no +indecisiveness arises and you can follow with absolute faith. Remember this: a system is +created to create faith, to create trust. If everything is clear, then there will be trust more +easily. If all your questions are answered mathematically, then you will be in a state of no +doubt and you can proceed. So sometimes Mahavir answers your absurd questions also. +They are futile questions, meaningless, but he will answer. And he will answer in such a +way that it helps you to have trust, because that quality of trust is needed. + +When someone tries to penetrate into the unknown a deep trust is needed otherwise it +will be impossible to move. It will be so dangerous you will get scared. It is dark, the +path is not clear, everything is chaos and every step leads you into more and more +insecurity. Hence system-making is needed so that everything is planned: you know +everything about heaven and hell and the ultimate moksha, and from where you will +move, from where you will pass. + +Every inch has been mapped. That gives you a security, a feeling, that everything is okay. +People have been there before and you are not moving into a no-man's land, you are not +moving into the unknown. A system makes it appear as if it is known. That is to help you, +just to give you support. And if you have faith then you will have energy to move. If you +are doubtful, you will dissipate energy and movement will be difficult. + +System-makers have tried to answer all types of questions and they have created a neat +and clean map. With that map in your hand you feel everything is okay, you can proceed. +But I tell you, every system is just artificial. Every system is just to help you. It is not +true. No system can be true. It is a device. But it helps because your whole personality is +so untrue that even untrue devices help. You live in lies and you cannot understand truth. +A system means less lies and then even less lies and then by and by, by and by, you will + + + +come nearer and nearer to the truth. When the truth is revealed to you the system will +become meaningless, it will simply drop. + +When Sariputta became enlightened, came to the ultimate goal, he looked back from that +point and saw that the whole system had disappeared. Whatsoever he had been taught +was not there. So he said to Buddha, "The whole system that was taught to me has +disappeared." Buddha said to him, "Keep silent, don’t tell the others! It has disappeared, it +has to disappear because it was never there, it was a make-believe — but it helped you to +come to this point. + +Don’t tell those who have not come yet, because if they know that there is no knowledge +where they are going to they will drop. They cannot go into the unknown unguarded, +alone they cannot go." + +It happens many times. It has been my own experience that people come to me and they +say, "Now meditation is going deep but we are scared." An ultimate feeling is bound to +come when you feel a "dying" fear, as if death is approaching near. When meditation +comes to its peak it is death-like. I tell them, "Don’t worry, I am with you." Then they +feel okay. I cannot be there — impossible! No one can be there. This is untrue. No one +can be there, you will be alone. That point is one of total aloneness. But when I say, "I +will be there, you don't worry, you go ahead," they feel okay and they move. If I say, +"You will be alone and no one is going to be there," they will step back. The point has +come where fear is bound to be there. The abyss is there and they are going to fall — I +must help them to fall. So I say that I am there, you just take the jump. And they take the +jump! After the jump they will come to know that no one was there, but now, now the +whole thing is finished. They cannot come back. This is a device. + +All systems are devices to help: to help people who are full of doubts, to help people who +have no trust, to help people who have no confidence. To help people to move into the +unknown without fear, systems are created. + +In those systems everything is just like a myth, that is why there are so many systems. +Mahavir creates his own — that system is created according to the needs of his followers. +So he creates a system. It is a myth, but very helpful, because many moved through it and +reached to the truth. And when they reached they knew that the system was false — but it +worked. + +Buddha defines truth as "That which works". His definition of truth is "That which +works". If a lie can work, it is true, and if a truth cannot work, it is false. + +There are so many systems, and every system helps. But every system cannot help +everybody. That is why the old religions insisted that a person should not be converted +into a new religion, because although the mind can after a time be conditioned in a +system and can be changed, deep down you will never change, and a new system will +never become useful for you. A Hindu can become a Christian, a Christian can become a +Hindu, but after the age of seven the mind is almost fixed, conditioned, so if a Hindu +becomes a Christian he will remain a Hindu deep down and the Christian system will not +help him. And he has lost contact with his own system which might have worked. + +Hindus and Jews have always been against conversion. Not only against conversion — if +someone wants to enter into their religion voluntarily, they will resist. They will say, + +"No, follow your own path." + + +Because a system is a great unconscious phenomenon; it has to be deep in the + + + +unconscious, only then can it help. Otherwise it cannot help and it is an artificial thing. It +is just like language. You can never speak any language as you speak your mother- +tongue, it is impossible. Nothing can be done about it. Howsoever efficient you become +in somebody else's language it will remain superficial. Deep down your mother-tongue +will continue to influence it. Your dreams will be in your mother-tongue; the unconscious +will function with the original language. Anything can be imposed on and above it, but it +cannot be replaced. + +Religious systems are like language, they are language. But if they penetrate deep, they +help because you feel confident. The system is irrelevant but the confidence is relevant. +You feel trusting so you move with a sure step — you know where you are moving. And +this knowing helps. + +But there are system-destroyers also and they also help. There is a rhythmic circle, just +like day and night — again day comes, again night comes. They help because sometimes +it happens that when there are so many systems people get confused, and rather than +moving with the maps, the maps become so heavy that they cannot carry them. It happens +always. + +For example, a tradition, a very long tradition, is helpful because it will give confidence +because it is so long. + +But because it is so long it is heavy also, it has become a dead weight. So rather than +helping you to move, you cannot move because of it. You have to be unburdened. So +there are system-destroyers who destroy the system from your mind and unburden you +and help you to move. They both help, but it depends. It depends on the age, it depends +on the person who is to be helped. + +In this age systems have become very heavy and confused. For many reasons the whole +point has been lost. Before, each system lived in its own world: a Jain was born Jain, +lived Jain, died Jain. He did not study Hindu scriptures, it was prohibited. He did not go +to the mosque or the church, that was a sin. He lived in the walls of his system. Nothing +alien ever penetrated his mind, so no confusion was there. + +But all that has been destroyed and everyone is acquainted with everything else. Hindus +are reading the Koran and Mohammedans are reading the Gita. Christians are moving to +the East and the East is moving to the West. Everything is confused. The confidence that +used to come from a system is no longer there. Everything has penetrated your mind and +things are jumbled up. Jesus is not alone there, Krishna has penetrated and Mohammed +has also penetrated. And they have contradicted each other within you. Now nothing is +certain. + +The Bible says this, the Gita says exactly the contrary. Mohammed says this, Mahavir is +just the opposite. + +They have contradicted. You are no longer anywhere. You don’t belong, you are simply +standing there confused. No path is yours. In such a state of mind, system-destroying can +be helpful. Hence the great appeal of Krishnamurti in the West. He does not have so +much appeal in the East because the East is still not as confused as the West, because the +East is still not as educated about others. The West is obsessed about knowing about +others. They know too much. Now no system is real, they know that everything is a +make-believe, and once you know it, it will not work. + +Krishnamurti appeals to them because he says leave all systems. If you can leave all +systems you will become unconfused — but it depends on you. It may happen, as it + + + +happens almost always, that all the systems will remain there and this new system of +destroying all systems will also enter. So one more disease is added. + +Jesus goes on speaking, Krishna goes on speaking — and then Krishnamurti also enters. +Your mind becomes the Tower of Babel — so many tongues and you cannot understand +what is happening. You just feel crazy. + +If you can believe in a system, so far so good; if you cannot believe in any system, then +drop all. Then be completely clean, unburdened. But don’t be just in the middle of these +two alternatives. And it appears that everyone is just in the middle. Sometimes you move +to the right, sometimes to the left, then again to the right and then to left — just like the +pendulum of a clock. + +You go from this side to that, this side to that. This movement may appear to you that +you are proceeding. You are not proceeding anywhere. Every step cancels some other +step, because when you move to the right and then to the left you go on contradicting +yourself. In the end you are just confused, puzzled, a chaos. + +Either be unburdened completely — that will be helpful. You will be clean, innocent, +childlike, and you can fly — or if that understanding seems too dangerous to you, if you +are afraid of unburdening because that will lead you into a vacuum, into an emptiness, if +that unburdening looks dangerous and you are scared, then choose a system. But there are +many who go on saying to you that everything is the same — the Koran says the same, the +Bible says the same, the Gita says the same, their message is the same. These people are +the great confusers. The Koran, the Bible, the Gita, they don't say the same, they are +systems. Clear-cut systems. Different. Not only different, but sometimes contradictory +and opposite. + +For example, Mahavir says that non-violence has to be the key. If you are violent, even +slightly violent, the door of ultimate reality is closed for you. This is a technique. To +become totally non-violent needs a complete cleansing of your mind and body — both. +You have to be purified completely, only then will you become non-violent. This process +of becoming no-violent will purify you so totally that the very process will become the +end. + + +Just the opposite is Krishna’s message. He says to Arjuna, "Don’t be afraid of killing +because the soul cannot be killed. You can kill the body but you cannot kill the soul. So +why be afraid? And the body is already dead, so that which is dead will be dead and that +which is alive will remain alive. You need not be concerned. It is just a play." He is also +right, because if you can come to realize this point — that the soul cannot be destroyed — +then the whole life becomes a play, a fiction, a drama. And if the whole life becomes a +drama, even murder and suicide become a drama to you, not just in thinking, but you +realize the fact that everything is just a dream. Death too will make you a witness, and +that witnessing will become transcendence... you will transcend the world. The whole +world becomes a drama — there is nothing good, nothing bad, just a dream. You need not +worry about it. + +But these two things are totally different. They lead to the same point ultimately but you +should not mix them. If you mix them, you will suffer. System-makers have been there to +help you, system-destroyers have been there to help you. But it seems that no one has +been able to help. You are such, so adamant and so cunning, you always find some +loopholes to escape through. + + + +Buddha and Krishna and Jesus — every century they go on teaching certain things. You +go on listening but you are very clever. + +You listen and yet you don't listen. And you always find something, some hole, from +where you can escape. Now the trick of the modern mind is that if there is a system, if +Gurdjieff is teaching, then people will go to him and say, "Krishnamurti says no +system." These same people will go to Krishnamurti — Krishnamurti teaches no-system — +and they will say, "But Gurdjieff says that without a system nothing can be done." So +while near Gurdjieff they use Krishnamurti as a loophole to escape; while near +Krishnamurti they use Gurdjieff as a trick to escape. But they are not deceiving anybody, +they are simply destroying themselves. + +Gurdjieff can help, Krishnamurti can help, but they cannot help against you. You must be +certain about certain things. One, either you need help or you don’t need it. Second, either +you can move into the unknown without any fear or you cannot. And third, without any +method, without any technique, without any system, can you proceed a single inch or +can’t you? These three things you have to decide within you: analyze your mind, open it, +look into it and decide what type of mind you have got. If you decide that you cannot do +it alone then you need a system, a master, a scripture, a technique. If you think that you +can do alone then there is no need for anything else. You are the master, you are the +scripture, you are the technique. But be honest, and if you feel that it is impossible to +decide — it is not easy to decide — if you feel confused, then first try a master, a +technique, a system. + +And try it hard, to the very extreme, so that if something is going to happen, it happens. If +nothing is going to happen then you come to a point where you can decide that now you +will have all, you will be alone. That too will be good. + +But my suggestion is that you should always start with a master, a system, a technique, +because in both ways it will be good. If you can achieve through it, it is good; if you +cannot achieve through it, then the whole thing becomes futile and you can drop it and +then you can proceed alone. Then you will not need Krishnamurti to tell you that no +master is needed, you will kn ow it. Then you will not need any Zen teaching to tell you +to throw away your scriptures and bum them, you will have already burned them. + +So it is good to proceed with a master, with a system, with a technique — but be sincere. +When I say be sincere I mean that you should do whatsoever you can do with a master, so +that if something can happen, it happens. If nothing can happen, then you can conclude +that this is not the path for you and you can move alone. + + +THE END. + + + +Chapter 77: Become each being + + +FEEL THE CONSCIOUSNESS OF EACH PERSON AS YOUR OWN +CONSCIOUSNESS. + +SO, LEAVING ASIDE CONCERN FOR SELF, BECOME EACH BEING. + +THIS CONSCIOUSNESS EXISTS AS EACH BEING, AND NOTHING ELSE EXISTS. +THIS CONSCIOUSNESS IS THE SPIRIT OF GUIDANCE OF EACH ONE. BE THIS +ONE. + +Existence as such is one. The human problem arises because of human self- +consciousness. Consciousness gives everyone a feeling that they are separate, and the +feeling that you are separate from existence creates all the problems. Basically this +feeling is false, and whatsoever is based on a falsity will create anguish, will create +problems, will create confusion. And whatsoever you do, if it is based on this false +separateness, it will go wrong. + +So from the very beginning the problem of human anguish has to be tackled: how does it +arise? Consciousness gives you a feeling that you are the center of your being, and +consciousness makes you aware that others are 'other’, that you are different from them. +This difference is just because you are conscious. While you are asleep there is no +difference — you are again merged with the universe. Hence so much bliss comes out of +sleep. In the morning you feel refreshed, rejuvenated, again alive, fresh. + +What is happening in deep sleep? You are losing your ego, you are losing yourself, you +are falling into a unity with the universe. + +That falling back int the unity makes you fresh and alive, and in the morning you feel +blissful. All the anguish disappears; all conflict, all disturbance, disappears; all fear, all +death disappears — because death is possible only if you are separate. If you are not +separate, then death is impossible. Who is going to die if you are not separate? Who can +suffer if you are not separate? So all Tantra, yoga and other methods of meditation are +just to make you aware that separateness is false and inseparateness is real. And if you +can become aware of that you will be totally different, because the center will have +disappeared from you and it will take its right place in the universe. You will be just a +wave on this vast ocean. You will not be separate so you will not be afraid. You will not +feel insecure. You will not feel the anguish of approaching death and annihilation. All +that disappears with the ego. + +Hindus have always believed that samadhi is conscious sleep. In sleep it happens +automatically that you are no more. The existence is, and you are no more; but you are +deeply unconscious so you don’t know what is happening. If this same phenomenon can +happen consciously, you become enlightened. Buddha moves to the same source, to the +same source that you move every night in deep sleep, in dreamless sleep. But Buddha +moves to that source consciously, alert, aware. He knows where he is moving to, he +knows what is happening, and when he comes back from that deep source, he comes +totally different. + +The old has disappeared and a new being, a new energy has arisen out of it. Of this being, +the center is the universe; and with this transfer of the center, all your worry, all your +anguish, all your hell disappears, simply disappears. It is not solved, it is simply not + + + +there. It cannot exist there without the ego.] + +So how to be consciously deep asleep? How to move into sleep consciously? How to +remain alert while you are losing the ego? The ego is a by-product, a by-product of your +whole upbringing, a by-product of the natural course of life. It has to be there. There is no +other way. No being can evolve without being involved with the ego. But a point comes +when the ego can be dropped and should be dropped, and the being should transcend it. +The ego is just like the shell of the egg. It is needed, it protects. Just like the shell of a +seed, it is needed, it protects. But the protection can become dangerous also, if it protects +too much. If it goes on protecting and doesn’t allow the seed to sprout, then it becomes a +hindrance. It must dissolve into the earth so that the inner life evolves out of it. It must +die. + +The seed must die. Every man is bom as a seed. The ego is the outer covering; it protects +the child. If a child is bom without the ego, without the feeling that "I exist", he cannot +survive. He will to be able to protect himself, he will not be able to struggle, he will not +be able in any way to exist. + +He needs a strong center. Even if it is false, it is needed. But a moment comes when this +help becomes a hindrance. It protects you from outside, but it become so strong that it +will not allow you, the inner being, to spread, to go beyond it, to sprout. So ego is needed +— and then ego-transcendence is needed. + +If someone dies with the ego, he has died as a seed. He has died without really attaining +the destiny that was possible, without attaining existence consciously These techniques +are for how to destroy this seed. + +The first technique: + +FEEL THE CONSCIOUSNESS OF EACH PERSON AS YOUR OWN +CONSCIOUSNESS. + +SO, LEAVING ASIDE CONCERN FOR SELF, BECOME EACH BEING. + +FEEL THE CONSCIOUSNESS OF EACH PERSON AS YOUR OWN +CONSCIOUSNESS. In reality it is so, but it is not felt so. You feel your consciousness as +yours, and others' consciousnesses you never feel. At the most you infer that others are +also conscious. You infer because you think that because you are conscious, other beings +like you must be conscious. This is a logical inference; you don't feel them as conscious. +It is just like when you have a headache you feel your headache, you have a +consciousness of it. But if someone else has a headache, you infer — you cannot feel the +other's headache. You simply infer that whatsoever he is saying must be true and he must +have something like you. + +But you cannot feel it. + +The feeling can come only if you become conscious about others' consciousnesses — +otherwise it is a logical inference. You believe, you trust, that others are saying +something honestly, and whatsoever they are saying is worth believing because you also +have similar types of experiences. + +There is a logical school which says that nothing can be known about the other, it is +impossible. At the most there can be an inference but nothing certain can be known about +others. How can you know that others have pain like you, that others have anxieties like +you? Others are there but we cannot penetrate them, we can only just touch their surface. + + + +Their inner being remains unknown. We remain closed in ourselves. + +The world around us is not a felt world, it is just inferred — logically, rationally. The +mind says it is there but the heart is not touched by it. That is why we behave with others +as if they are things not persons. Our relationship with persons is also as it is with things. +A husband behaves towards his wife as if she is a thing: he possesses her. The wife +possesses the husband just like a thing. If we behaved with the other as if they were +persons then we would not try to possess them, because only things can be possessed. + +A person means freedom. A person cannot be possessed. If you try to possess them, you +will kill them, they will become things. + +Our relationship with others is really not an 'I-thou' relationship, deep down it is just an +T-if relationship. The other is just a thing to be manipulated, to be used, exploited. That +is why love becomes more and more impossible, because love means taking the other as +a person, as a conscious being, as a freedom, as something as valuable as you are. + +If you behave as if everything is a thing, then you are the center and things are just to be +used. The relationship becomes utilitarian. Things have no value in themselves — the +value is that you can use them, they exist for you. You can be related to your house — the +house exists for you. It is a utility. The car exists for you, but the wife doesn't exist for +you and the husband doesn’t exist for you. The husband exists for himself and the wife +exists for herself. A person exists for himself; that is what being a person means. And if +you allow the person to be a person and don’t reduce him to being a thing, you will by +and by start feeling him. Otherwise you cannot feel. Your relationship will remain +conceptual, intellectual, mind to mind, head to head — but not heart to heart. + +This technique says, FEEL THE CONSCIOUSNESS OF EACH PERSON AS YOUR +OWN CONSCIOUSNESS. This will be difficult because first you have to feel the person +as a person, as a conscious being. Even that is difficult. + +Jesus says, "Love your neighbor as you love yourself." + +This is the same thing — but the other must first become a person for you. He must exist +in his own right, not to be exploited, manipulated, utilized, not as a means but an end in +himself. First, the other must become a person; the other must become a 'thou', as +valuable as you are. Only then can this technique be applied. FEEL THE +CONSCIOUSNESS OF EACH PERSON AS YOUR OWN CONSCIOUSNESS. First +feel that the other is conscious, and then this can happen — you can feel that the other has +the same consciousness that you have. Really, the 'other' disappears, only a +consciousness flows between you and him. You become two poles of one consciousness +flowing, of one current. + +In deep love it happens that the two persons are not two. Something between the two has +come into being and they have just become two poles. Something is flowing between the +two. When this flow is there you will feel blissful. If love gives bliss, it gives bliss only +because of this: that two persons, just for a single moment, lose their egos — the 'other' is +lost and oneness comes into being just for as ingle moment. If it happens, it is ecstatic, it +is blissful, you have entered paradise. Just a single moment, and it can be transforming. +This technique says that you can do this with every person. In love you can do it with one +person, but in meditation you have to do it with every person. Whosoever comes near +you, simply dissolve into him and feel that you are not two lives, but one life, flowing. + + +This is just changing the gestalt. Once you know how, once you have done it, it is very + + + +easy. In the beginning it seems impossible because we are so stuck in our own egos. It is +difficult to lose it, difficult to become a flow. So it will be good if in the beginning you +try with something that you are not very scared or afraid of. + +You will be less afraid of a tree so it will be easier. Sitting near a tree, just feel the tree +and feel that you have become one with it, that there is a flow within you, a +communication, a dialogue, a melting. Sitting near a flowing river just feel the flow, feel +that you and the river have become one. Lying under the sky, just feel that you and the +sky have become one. In the beginning it will be just imagination but by and by you will +feel that you are touching reality through imagination. + +And then try it with persons. This is difficult in the beginning because there is a fear. +Because you have been reducing persons to things, you are afraid that if you allow +someone to be so intimate he will also reduce you to a thing. That is the fear. So no one +allows much intimacy: a gap is always to be kept and guarded. Too much closeness is +dangerous because the other can convert you into a thing, he can try to possess you. That +is the fear. You are trying to convert others into things, and others are trying to convert +you — and no one wants to be a thing, no one wants to become a means, no one wants to +be used. + +It is the most degrading phenomenon to be reduced to just a means to something, not +valuable in yourself. But everyone is trying. Because of this there is a deep fear and it +will be difficult to start this technique with persons. + +So start with a river, with a hill, with the stars, with the sky, with trees. Once you come to +know the feeling of what happens when you become one with the tree; once you come to +know how blissful you become when you become one with the river, how without losing +anything you gain the whole existence — then you can try it with persons. And if it is so +blissful with a tree, with a river, you cannot imagine how much more blissful it will be +with a person, because a person is a higher phenomenon, a more highly evolved being. +Through a person you can reach higher peaks of experience. If you can become ecstatic +with even a rock, with a person you can feel a Divine ecstasy happening to you. + +But start with something that you are not much afraid of, or, if there is a person you love, +a friend, a beloved, a lover, of whom you are not afraid, with whom you can be really +intimate and close without any fear, with whom you can lose yourself without getting +scared deep down that he may turn you into a thing — if you have someone like that, then +try this technique. Lose yourself consciously into him. When you lose yourself +consciously into someone, that someone will lose himself into you; when you are open +and you flow into the other, the other starts flowing into you and there is a deep meeting, +a communion. + +Two energies melt into each other. In that state there is no ego, no individual — simply +consciousness. And if this is possible with one individual, it is possible with the whole +universe. What saints have called ecstasy, samadhi, is just a deep love phenomenon +between a person and the whole universe. + +FEEL THE CONSCIOUSNESS OF EACH PERSON AS YOUR OWN +CONSCIOUSNESS. SO, LEAVING ASIDE CONCERN FOR SELF, BECOME EACH +BEING. We are always concerned with our own self. Even while we are in love, we are +concerned with our own self, that is why love becomes a misery. It can become heaven +but it becomes a hell, because even lovers are concerned with their own selves. The other +is loved because he gives you happiness, the other is loved because you feel good with + + + +him, but the other is still not loved as if he is something valuable in himself or herself. +The value comes through your enjoyment. You are gratified, you are satisfied in some +way, that is why the other has become significant. This is also using the other. + +Concern for the self means exploitation of the other. And religious consciousness can +come into existence only when the concern for the self is lost, because then you become +non-exploitive. With existence your relationship becomes one, not of exploitation, but of +sheer sharing, sheer bliss. You are not using, you are not being used — it becomes a sheer +celebration of being. + + +But concern for the self has to be thrown away... and it is very deep-rooted. It is so deep- +rooted that you are not even aware of it. In one of the Upanishads it is said that the +husband loves his wife, not for the wife, but for himself; and the mother loves the child, +not for the child, but for herself. The concern for the self is so deep-rooted that +whatsoever you do, you do for yourself. This means that you are always gratifying the +ego, feeding the ego, feeding a false center which has become a barrier between you and +the universe. + +Lose the concern for the self. If even sometimes, even for a few moments, you can lose +concern for the self and can become concerned with the other, with the other's self, you +will be entering a different reality, a different dimension. Hence so much emphasis on +service, love, compassion. Because compassion, love, service, mean concern for the +other's self, not your own. + +But look... human mind is so cunning that it has converted service, compassion and love +into concerns for the self. A Christian missionary serves, and his service is sincere. +Really, no one else can serve so deeply and intensely as a Christian missionary. No +Hindu can do that, no Mohammedan can do that, because Jesus has emphasized service +so much. A Christian missionary is serving poor people, ill people, diseased people, but +deep down he is concerned with himself not with them. + +This service is just a method to reach heaven. He is not concerned with them, he is not +really concerned with them at all, he is concerned with his own self. Through service he +can achieve a greater self, so he is doing service. But he has missed the basic point, +because service means the concern for the other — the other is the center and you have +become the periphery. + +Try it some time. Make someone the center — then his happiness becomes your +happiness, his misery becomes your misery. Whatsoever happens, happens to him and +flows to you. But he is the center. If once, even once, you can feel that the other is the +center and you have become just a periphery to him, you have entered a different type of +existence, a different dimension of experience. Because in that moment you will feel a +deep bliss, unknown before, unexperienced before. Just by making the other the concern, +you will lose all misery. In that moment there will be no hell for you; you have entered +paradise. + +Why does it happen? It happens because the ego is the root of all misery. If you can +forget it, if you can dissolve it, all misery dissolves with it. + +FEEL THE CONSCIOUSNESS OF EACH PERSON AS YOUR OWN +CONSCIOUSNESS. SO, LEAVING ASIDE CONCERN FOR SELF, BECOME EACH +BEING. Become the tree, become the river, become the wife, become the husband, +become the child, become the mother, become the friend — it can be practiced every + + + +moment of life. + + +But in the beginning it will be difficult, so do it for a least one hour every day. In that +hour, whatsoever passes around you, become that. You will wonder how it can happen. +There is no other way to know how it can happen — you have to practice it. + +Sit with the tree and feel that you have become the tree. And when the wind comes and +the whole tree starts shaking and trembling, feel that shaking and trembling in you; when +the sun rises and the whole tree becomes alive, feel that aliveness in you; when a shower +of rain comes and the whole tree is satisfied and content, a long thirst, a long awaiting +has disappeared and the tree is completely satisfied and content, feel satisfied and content +with the tree, and then you will become aware of the subtle moods, of the nuances of a +tree. + +You have seen that tree for many years, but you don't know its moods. Sometimes it is +happy; sometimes it is unhappy. Sometimes it is sad, dead, worried, frustrated; +sometimes it is very blissful, ecstatic. There are moods. The tree is alive and it feels. And +if you become one with it, then you will feel it. Then you will feel whether the tree is +young or old; whether the tree is dissatisfied with its life or satisfied; whether the tree is +in love with existence or not — is anti, against, furious, angry; whether the tree is violent +or there is a deep compassion in it. As you are changing every moment, the tree is also +changing — if you can feel a deep affinity with it, what they call empathy. + + +Empathy means you have become so sympathetic that really you become one. The moods +of the tree become your moods. And then, if this goes deeper and deeper and deeper, you +can talk, you can have a communication with the tree. Once you know its moods you +start understanding its language, and the tree will share its mind with you. It will share its +agonies and ecstasies. + +And this can happen with the whole universe. + +For at least one hour every day try to be in empathy with something. In the beginning you +will look foolish to yourself. You will think, "What kind of stupidity am I doing?" You +will look around and you will feel that if someone looks or someone sees or someone +comes to know, they will think you have gone crazy. But only in the beginning. Once you +enter this world of empathy the whole world will look crazy to you. They are missing so +much unnecessarily. Life gives in such abundance and they are missing it. They are +missing because they are closed: they don’t allow life to enter into them. And life can +enter you only if you enter life through many, many ways, through many paths, through +multi-dimensions. Be in empathy for at least one hour every day. + +This was the meaning of prayer in the beginning of every religion. The meaning of prayer +was to be in an affinity with the universe, to be in a deep communication with the +universe. In prayer you are talking to God — God means the totality. + +Sometimes you may be angry with God, sometimes thankful, but one thing is certain — +you are in communication. God is not a mental concept, it has become a deep, intimate +relationship. That is what prayer means. + +But our prayers have gone rotten because we don’t know how to communicate with +beings. And if you cannot communicate with beings, you cannot communicate with the +Being — Being with a capital 'B’ — it is impossible. If you cannot communicate with a +tree, how can you communicate with the total existence? And if you feel foolish talking + + + +to a tree, you will feel more foolish talking to God. + +Leave one hour aside every day for a prayerful state of mind, and don't make your prayer +a verbal affair. Make it a feeling thing. Rather than talking with the head, feel it. Go and +touch the tree, hug the tree, kiss the tree; close your eyes and be with the tree as if you are +with your beloved. Feel it. And soon you will come to a deep understanding of what it +means to put the self aside, of what it means to become the other. + +FEEL THE CONSCIOUSNESS OF EACH PERSON AS YOUR OWN +CONSCIOUSNESS. SO, LEAVING ASIDE CONCERN FOR SELF, BECOME EACH +BEING. + +The second technique: + +THIS CONSCIOUSNESS EXISTS AS EACH BEING, AND NOTHING ELSE EXISTS. + +Scientists used to say in the past that only matter existed, nothing else. Great systems of +philosophy arose based on the concept that only matter existed. + +But even those who believed that matter existed had to concede that there was something +like consciousness. Then what was it? They said that consciousness was just an epi- +phenomenon, just a by-product of matter. It was nothing but matter in disguise, +something very subtle but still material. But this half century has seen a very great +miracle happen. + +Scientists tried and tried to find out what matter was, but the more they tried, they more +they came to realize that there was nothing like matter. Matter was analyzed and it was +found that it had disappeared. Nietzsche had said just a hundred years before, "God is +dead." With God dead there can be no consciousness because God means the totality of +consciousness. But within a hundred years matter is dead — and it is dead not because +religious people believe it so but because scientists have come to a definite conclusion +that matter is just appearance. It appears to be as it is because we cannot see very deeply. +If we can see deeply it disappears, and then energy is left. + +This phenomenon of energy, this non-material energy force, has been known by mystics +since long ago.In the Vedas, in the Bible, in the Koran, in the Upanishads — ah over the +world mystics have penetrated into existence and have always concluded that matter is +just an appearance; deep down there is no matter, only energy. With this science now +agrees. + +And the mystics have said one thing more which science has yet to agree with — but with +which it will have to agree one day! The mystics have come to another conclusion also. +They say that when you penetrate deep into energy, energy also disappears and only +consciousness remains. + +So these are the three layers. Matter is the first layer, the surface. If you penetrate the +surface then the second layer becomes apparent: you can perceive the second layer which +is energy. Then if you penetrate energy, the third layer becomes illumined — that third +layer is consciousness. In the beginning, science said that mystics were just dreaming, +because science saw only matter and nothing else. Then science tried to penetrate, and +the mystics' second layer was uncovered: matter is just apparent — deep down it is +nothing but energy. And the mystics' other claim is: penetrate more into energy and +energy also disappears, then there remains only consciousness. That consciousness is +God. That is the deepest-most core. + + + +If you penetrate into your body, these three layers are there. Just on the surface is your +body. The body looks material, but deep down there are currents of life, PRANA, vital +energy. Without that vital energy your body would be just a corpse. It is alive, with +something flowing in it. That flowing 'something’ is energy. But deeper, still deeper, you +are aware, you can witness. + +You can witness both your body and your vital energy. That witnessing is your +consciousness. + +Every existence has three layers. The deepest is the witnessing consciousness. In the +middle is vital energy and just on the surface is matter, a material body. + +This technique says, THIS CONSCIOUSNESS EXISTS AS EACH BEING, AND +NOTHING ELSE EXISTS. WHAT ARE YOU? Who are you? If you close your eyes +and try to find out who you are, ultimately you are bound to come to a conclusion that +you are consciousness. Everything else may belong to you, but you are not that. The body +belongs to you, but you can be aware of the body — and that which is aware of the body +becomes separate. The body becomes an object of knowledge and you become the +subject. You can know your body .Not only can you know, you can manipulate your +body, you can activate it or make it inactive. You are separate. You can do something +with your body. + +And not only are you not your body, you are not your mind either. You can become +aware of your mind also. If thoughts move, you can see them, and you can do something +with them: you can make them disappear completely, you can become thoughtless. Or, +you can concentrate your consciousness on one thought and not allow it to move from +there. You can focus yourself on it and make it remain there. Or, you can allow a +riverlike flow of thoughts. You can do something with your thoughts. + +You can even dissolve them completely until there is no thought — but still you are. You +will know that there are no thoughts, that a vacuum has come into being; but you will be +there, witnessing that vacuum. + +The only thing you cannot separate yourself from is your witnessing energy. That means +you are that. You cannot separate yourself from it. You can separate yourself from +everything else: you can know that you are not your body, not your mind, but you cannot +know that you are not your witnessing because whatsoever you do you will be the +witness. You cannot separate yourself from witnessing. That witnessing is consciousness. +And unless you come to a point from where separation becomes impossible, you have not +come to yourself. + +So there are methods by which the seeker goes on eliminating. He goes on eliminating — +first the body, then the mind, and then he comes to the point where nothing can be +eliminated. In the Upanishads they say, NETI, NETI. This is a deep method: "This is not, +that is not." So the seeker goes on knowing, "This is not, this is not me, this is not I." He +goes on and on until ultimately he comes to a point where he cannot say. "This is not I." +Just a witnessing self remains. Pure consciousness remains. This pure consciousness +exists as each being. + +Whatsoever is in existence is just a phenomenon of this consciousness, just a wave, just a +crystallization of this consciousness — and nothing else exists. + +But this has to be felt. Analysis can be helpful, intellectual understanding can be helpful, +but it has to be FELT that nothing else exists, only consciousness. Then behave as if only + + + +consciousness exists. + +I have heard about Lin Chi, a Zen master. As he was sitting one day in his hut someone +came to see him. The man who came was angry. He may have been fighting with his wife +or with his boss or something — but he was angry. He pushed open the door in anger, he +threw down his shoes in anger and then he came, very respectfully, and bowed down to +Lin Chi. Lin Chi said, "First go and ask forgiveness from the door and from the shoes." +The man must have looked at Lin Chi very strangely. There were other people also sitting +there and they started laughing. Lin Chi said, "Stop!" and then said to the man, "If you +don't do it then leave. I will have nothing to do with you." The man said, "It will look +crazy to ask forgiveness from the shoes and from the door." Lin Chi said, "It was not +crazy when you expressed anger. Will it now be crazy? Everything has a consciousness. +So you go, and unless the door forgives you, I am not going to allow you in." + +The man felt awkward but he had to go. Later on he became a monk himself and became +enlightened. When he became enlightened, he related the whole anecdote and he said, +"When I stood before the door, asking forgiveness, I felt awkward, foolish. But then I +thought that if Lin Chi says so, there must be something in it. I trusted Lin Chi, so I +thought that even if it was foolish do it. In the beginning whatsoever I was saying to the +door was just superficial, artificial; but by and by I started to get wann. And Lin Chi was +waiting and he said that he would watch. If the door forgave me, only then could I come +in; otherwise I had to stay there until I had persuaded the door and the shoes to forgive +me. By and by I became warm. I forgot that many people were looking. I forgot about +Lin Chi — and then the concern became sincere and real. I started to feel the door and the +shoes were changing their mood. And the moment I realized that the door and the shoes +had changed and that they are feeling happy, Lin Chi immediately said that I could come. +I had been forgiven." + +This incident became a transforming phenomenon in his life because for the first time he +became aware that everything is really a crystallization of consciousness. If you cannot +see it, it is because you are blind. If you cannot hear it, it is because you are deaf. There is +nothing the matter with the things around you. Everything is condensed consciousness. +The problem is with you — you are not open and sensitive. + +This technique says, THIS CONSCIOUSNESS EXISTS AS EACH BEING, AND +NOTHING ELSE EXISTS. Live with this notion. Be sensitive to this and wherever you +move, move with this mind and this heart — that everything is consciousness and nothing +else exists. + +Sooner or later, the world will change its face. Sooner or later, objects disappear and +persons start appearing everywhere. Sooner or later, the whole world will be suddenly +illumined and you will know that you were living in a world of dead things just because +of your insensitivity. Otherwise everything is alive — not only alive, everything is +conscious. + +Everything deep down is nothing but consciousness. But if you leave it as a theory, if you +believe in it as a theory, then nothing will happen. You will have to make it a way of life +a style of life — behaving as if everything is conscious. In the beginning it will be an 'as +if, and you will feel foolish, but if you can persist in your foolishness, and if you can +dare to be foolish, soon the world will start revealing its mysteries. + +Science is not the only methodology to use to enter the mysteries of existence. Really, it +is the crudest methodology, the slowest. A mystic can enter existence in a single moment. +Science will take millions of years to penetrate that much. The Upanishads say that the + + + +world is illusory, that matter is illusory, but only after five thousand years can science say +that matter is illusory. The Upanishads say that deep down energy is conscious — science +will take another five thousand years more. Mysticism is a jump; science is a very slow +movement. The intellect cannot jump; it has to argue — argue every fact, prove, disprove, +experiment. + +But the heart can jump immediately. + +Remember, for the intellect a process is necessary, then comes the conclusion — process +first, then the conclusion — logical. For the heart, conclusion comes first, then the +process. It is just the reverse. That is why mystics cannot prove anything. They have the +conclusion, but they don’t have the process. + +You may not be aware, you may not have noticed, that mystics simply talk about +conclusions. If you read the Upanishads you will find only conclusions. When for the +first time they were translated into Western languages, Western philosophers couldn’t see +the point — because there was no argument. How do you reach this conclusion? What is +the proof? On what premises do you declare, "There is Brahma"? The Upanishads don’t +say anything, they simply come to a conclusion. The heart reaches a conclusion +immediately. And when the conclusion is reached, you can create the process. That is the +meaning of theology. + +Mystics reach the conclusion and theologians create the process. Jesus reached the +conclusion and then the theologians — St. Augustine, Thomas Aquinas — they created the +process. That is secondary. The conclusion has been reached, now you have to find the +proofs. The proof is in the life of the mystic. He cannot argue about it. He himself is the +proof — if you can see it. If you cannot see, then there is no proof. + +Then religion is absurd. + +Don't make these techniques theories. They are not. They are jumps into experience, +jumps into conclusion. + +The third technique: + +THIS CONSCIOUSNESS IS THE SPIRIT OF GUIDANCE OF EACH ONE. BE THIS +ONE. + +The first thing is that you have the guide within you but you don’t use it. And you have +not used it for so long, for so many lives, that you may not even be aware that a guide +exists within you. I was reading Castaneda's book. His master, Don Juan, gives him a +beautiful experiment to do. It is one of the oldest experiments. + +On a dark night, on a very hilly track, dangerous, without any light, Castaneda's master +said, "You simply believe in the inner guide and start running." It was dangerous. It was a +hilly track, unknown, with trees, bushes, abysses. He could fall anywhere. Even in the +daylight he had to be alert walking there, and at night everything was dark. He could not +see anything and his master said, "Don’t walk, run!" He couldn’t believe it! It was simply +suicidal. He became scared — but the master ran. He ran off just like a wild animal, and +came running back. And Castaneda could not understand how he was doing it. Not only +was he running in this darkness, but each time he came running directly to him, as if he +could see. Then by and by Castaneda gathered courage. If this old man could do this, why +not he? He tried, and by and by he felt an inner light coming in. + + + +Then he started running. + +You only ARE whenever you stop thinking. The moment you stop thinking, the inner +happens. If you don’t think, everything is okay — it is as if some inner guide is working. +Your reason has misguided you. And the greatest misguidance has been this: you cannot +believe in the inner guide. + +First, you have to convince your reason. Even if your inner guide says, "Go ahead," you +have to convince your reason and then you miss opportunities. Because there are +moments... you can use them or you can miss them. Intellect takes time, and while you +are pondering, contemplating, thinking, you miss the moment. Life is not waiting for you. +One has to live immediately. One has to be really a warrior — as they say in Zen — +because when you are fighting in the field with your sword, you cannot think. You have +to move without thinking. + +Zen masters have used the sword as a technique for meditation, and they say in Japan that +if two Zen masters, two meditative persons, are fighting with those swords, there can be +no conclusion. No one can be defeated and no one is going to win, because both are not +thinking.. The swords are just not in their hands, they are in the hands of their inner +guide, the non-thinking inner guide, and before the other attacks, the guide knows and +defends. You cannot think about it because there is no time. The other is aiming at your +heart. + +In a flash of a moment the sword will penetrate to the heart. There is no time to think +about it, about what to do. When the thought, "penetrate the heart" occurs to him, +simultaneously the thought, "defend" must occur to you — simultaneously, with no gap — +only then can you defend. Otherwise you will be no more. + +So they teach swordsmanship as a meditation and they say, "Be moment to moment with +the inner guide, don't think. Allow the inner being to do whatsoever happens to it. Don't +interfere with the mind." This is very difficult because we are so trained with our minds. +Our schools, our colleges, our universities, the whole culture, the whole pattern of +civilization, teach our heads. We have lost contact with the inner guide. Everyone is bom +with that inner guide but it is not allowed to work, to function. It is almost paralyzed, but +it can be revived. + +This sutra is for that inner guide. THIS CONSCIOUSNESS IS THE SPIRIT OF +GUIDANCE OF EACH ONE. BE THIS ONE. Don’t t hink with the head. Really, don’t +think at all. Just move. Try it is some situations. It will be difficult, because the old habit +will be to start thinking. You will have to be alert: not to think, but to feel inwardly what +is coming to the mind. You may be confused many times because you will not be able to +know whether it is coming from the inner guide or from the surface of the mind. But soon +you will know the feeling, the difference. + + +When something comes from the inner, it comes from your navel upwards. You can feel +the flow, the warmth, coming from the navel upwards. Whenever your mind thinks, it is +just on the surface, in the head, and then it goes down. If your mind decided something, +then you have to force it down. If your inner guide decides, then something bubbles up in +you. It comes from the deep core of your being towards the mind. The mind receives it, +but it is not of the mind. It comes from beyond — and that is why the mind is scared about +it. For reason it is reliable because it comes from behind — without any reason with it, +without any proofs. It simply bubbles up. + + + +Try it in certain situations. For example, you have lost your path in a forest. Try it. Don't +think — just close your eyes, sit down, be meditative, and don't think. Because it is futile +— how can you think? You don’t know. But thinking has become such a habit that you go +on thinking even in moments when nothing can come out of it. Thinking can think only +about something which is already known. You are lost in a forest, you don’t have any +map, there is nobody you can ask. What are you thinking about? But still you think. That +thinking will be just a worry, not a thinking. And the more you get worried, the less the +inner guide can be competent. + +Be unworried. Sit down under a tree, and just allow thoughts to drop and subside. + +Just wait, don’t think. Don’t create the problem, just wait. And when you feel a moment +of non-thinking has come, then stand up and start moving. Wheresoever your body +moves, allow it to move. You just be a witness. Don't interfere. The lost path can be +found very easily. But the only condition is, "Don't interfere with the mind." + +This has happened many times unknowingly. Great scientists say that whenever a great +discovery has been made, it was never made by the mind; it was always made by the +inner guide. + +Madame Curie was trying and trying to solve a mathematical problem. She did her best, +all that was possible. Then she got fed up. For days together, weeks together, she had +been working and nothing had come out. She was feeling just mad. No path was leading +to the solution. Then one night, just exhausted, she fell down and slept. And in the night, +in a dream, the conclusion bubbled up. She was so concerned with the conclusion that the +dream was broken, she awoke. Immediately she wrote down the conclusion — because +there was no process in the dream, just a conclusion. She wrote it down on a pad and then +slept again. In the morning she was puzzled; the conclusion was right, but she didn’t +know how it had been achieved. There was no process, no method. Then she tried to find +the process; now it was an easier affair because the conclusion was in the hand, and it is +easy to go back from the conclusion. + +She won the Nobel Prize because of this dream — but she always wondered how it +happened. + +When your mind gets exhausted and cannot do any more, it simply retires. In that +moment of retirement the inner guide can give hints, clues, keys. The man who won the +Nobel Prize for the inner structure of a human cell, saw it in a dream. He saw the whole +structure of the human cell, the inner cell, in a dream, and then in the morning he just +made a picture of it. He himself couldn’t believe that it could be so, so he had to work for +years. After years of work he could conclude that the dream was true. + +With Madame Curie it happened that when she came to know this inner process of the +inner guide, she decided to try it. Once there was a problem which she wanted to solve, +so she thought, "Why worry about it, and why try? Just go to sleep." She slept well, but +there was no solution. So she was puzzled. Many times she tried: when there was a +problem immediately she would go to sleep. But there was no solution. First, the intellect +has to be tried, completely; only then can the solution bubble up. The head has to be +completely exhausted otherwise it goes on functioning, even in a dream. + +So now scientists say that all the great discoveries are intuitive, not intellectual. This is +what is meant by the inner guide. + +THIS CONSCIOUSNESS OF THE SPIRIT OF GUIDANCE OF EACH ONE. + + + +BE THIS ONE. Lose the head and drop into this inner guide. It is there. Old scriptures +say that the master or the guru — the "outer" guru — can be helpful only in finding the +inner guru. That is all. Once the outer guru has helped you to find the inner guru, the +function of the outer guru is no more. + +You cannot reach to the truth through a master; you can reach only to the inner master +through a master — and then this inner master will lead you to the truth. The outer master +is just a representative, a substitute. He has his inner guide and he can feel your inner +guide also, because they both exist on the same wavelength — they both exist in the same +tuning and the same dimension. If I have found my inner guide, I can look into you and +feel your inner guide. And if I am really a guide to you, all my guidance will be to lead +you to your inner guide. + +Once you are in contact with the inner guide, I am no longer needed. Now you can move +alone. So all that a guru can do is to push you down from your head to your navel, from +your reasoning to your intuitive force, from your argumentative mind to your trusting +guide. And it is not like this with only human beings, it is so with animals, with birds, +with trees, with everything. The inner guide exists, and many new phenomena have been +discovered which are mysteries. + +There are a number of cases. For example, the mother fish dies immediately after she lays +the egg. + +Then the father helps the egg to be fertilized, and then he dies. The egg remains alone +without a mother and without a father. It matures. Then a new fish is born. This fish +doesn't know anything about father, mother, parents; she doesn’t know from where they +came. But although this particular fish lives in a particular part of the sea, she will move +to the part from where the father and mother came to lay the eggs. She will move to the +source. This has been happening again and again, and when she wans to lay an egg she +will come to this bank, lay the egg, and die. So there is no communication between +parents and their children but the children somehow know where they have to go, where +they have to move — and they never miss. And you cannot misguide them. It has been +tried, but you cannot misguide them. They will reach to the source. Some inner guide is +working. + +In Soviet Russia they have been experimenting with cats, with rats, and with many small +animals. A cat, a mother cat, was separated from her children and the children were taken +deep down into the sea; she could not know what was happening to her children. Every +type of scientific instrument was attached to the cat to measure what was going on within +her mind and her heart, and then one child was killed, deep in the sea. Immediately the +mother became aware. Her blood-rate changed. She became puzzled and worried, her +heartbeat increased. + +. as soon as the child was killed. And the scientific instrument said that she was feeling +severe pain. Then after a while everything became normal. Then another child was killed +— again the change. And the same with the third child. It happened every time, exactly at +the same time, without any time-gap. What was happening? + +Now Soviet scientists say the mother has an inner guide, an inner feeling-center and it is +joined to her children, wherever they are. And she immediately feels a telepathic +relationship. The human mother will not feel so much. This is puzzling. It should be quite +the otherwise: the human mother should feel more because she is more evolved. But she +will not because the head has taken everything into its hands and the inner centers are all + + + +lying paralyzed. + +THIS CONSCIOUSNESS IS THE SPIRIT OF GUIDANCE OF EACH ONE. BE THIS +ONE. Whenever you are puzzled in a situation and you cannot see how to get out of it, +don't think; just be in a deep non-thinking and allow the inner guide to guide you. In the +beginning you will feel afraid, insecure, but soon, when you come every time to the right +conclusion, when you come every time to the right door, you will gather courage and you +will become trusting. + +If this trust happens, I call it faith. This really is religious faith — the trust in the inner +guide. Reasoning is part of the ego. It is you believing in yourself. + +The moment you go deep within you, you have come to the very soul of the universe. +Your inner guide is part of the Divine guidance. When you follow it, you follow the +Divine; when you follow yourself, you are complicating things, and you don’t know what +you are doing. You may think yourself very wise. You are not. + +Wisdom comes from the heart, it is not of the intellect. Wisdom comes from the +innennost depth of your being, it is not of the head. Cut your head off, be headless — and +follow the being, whatsoever, wheresoever it leads. Even if it leads into danger, go into +danger, because that will be the path for you and your growth. Through that danger you +will grow and become mature. Even if the inner guide leads you to death, go into it, +because that is going to be the path for you. Follow it, trust it, and move with it. + +THE END. + + + +Chapter 78: The inner guide + + +The first question: + +Question 1 + +SOME OF THE TECHNIQUES IN THE ONE HUNDRED AND TWELVE METHODS +SEEM TO BE END RESULTS AND NOT TECHNIQUES, SUCH AS THOSE THAT +SAY TO "BECOME UNIVERSAL CONSCIOUSNESS" OR "BE THIS ONE" ETC. IT +SEEMS THAT WE NEED TECHNIQUES TO ACHIEVE THESE TECHNIQUES. +WERE TECHNIQUES LIKE THESE MEANT FOR VERY ADVANCED PERSONS +WHO COULD JUST BECOME COSMIC AT A MERE SUGGESTION? + +Such techniques were meant, not for very advanced persons, but for very innocent +persons — simple, innocent, trusting. Then just a suggestion is enough. You have to have +something to do because you cannot trust. You don't have faith. Unless you do something, +nothing can happen to you because you believe in action. If something happens to you +suddenly without any doing on your part, you will be scared and you will not believe it. +You may even bypass it; you may not even record in the mind that it happened. Unless +you DO, you cannot feel something happening to you — this is the way of the ego. But +for an innocent person, for an innocent, open mind, just a suggestion is enough. Why? +Because really, the innermost being is not something to be achieved in the future — it is +here and now, it is already the case. Whatsoever is to be attained is here, present in you +right this very moment. If you can trust without any effort, it can become revealed. It is +not a question of time, of you having to work it out. + +It is not somewhere far away that you have to travel to. It is you. You may call it God, +you may call it nirvana or whatsoever you like — it is you already. So even a suggestion , +if believed totally, can reveal it to you. That’s why so much significance is given to +SHRADDHA, trust, faith. If a person can believe in the master, just a hint, a suggestion, +an indication — and in a flash everything will be revealed. + +The basic point to be understood is this: there are things which you cannot attain right +now because time will be needed to produce them. They are not with you. If I give you a +seed, it cannot immediately become a tree. Time will be needed, and you will have to +wait and work. Then the seed cannot become the tree immediately. But you are really the +tree already. It is not a seed which has to be worked, it is a tree hidden in darkness, it is a +tree which is covered, it is a tree which you are inattentive too — that’s all. Your +inattention is the cover. You are not looking at it, that’s all. You are looking somewhere +else and that’s why you are missing it. In a trusting moment the master can tell you, just +by a suggestion, that it is here. And if you can believe, if you can look in that dimension +in trust, it will be revealed to you. + +These techniques are not for advanced people; they are for simple, innocent people. +Advanced people are, in a way, difficult. + +They are not innocent, they have been working, they have attained something, and they +have a subtle ego behind it. They know something so they are not innocent, they cannot +believe. You will have to argue and convince them — and then too they will have to make +some efforts. By an innocent mind, I mean a mind which is not arguing. It is just like a +small child. The child goes with his father hand in hand, he is not afraid. Whatsoever the + + + +father is leading, he must be leading in the right direction. The father knows — so the +child need not worry about it. He is not thinking of the future, what is going to happen is +not his concern. He is enjoying the very journey; the end is not the problem at all. For the +father it may be a problem. He may be afraid. He may be wondering whether they have +lost the path or not, whether they are on the right path or not. But for the child it is not a +problem. He knows that the father knows. That's all. And wherever the father leads, he +will follow — and he is happy at this very moment. + +A trusting disciple, an innocent mind is just like a child — and the master is more than a +father. Once the disciple surrenders, he trusts. Then at any moment, when the master +feels that the disciple is tuned, that the disciple is in harmony, he will just give a hint. + +I have heard about a Zen master, Bokuju. He struggled hard to attain enlightenment, but +nothing happened. + +Really, with a hard struggle sometimes nothing will happen, because the hard struggle is +through the ego. And through hard struggle the ego becomes more hard. He did +whatsoever could be done but the goal was no nearer. Rather, on the contrary, it was +further away; further away than when he had started the journey. He was puzzled, +confused, so he came to his master. The master said, "For a few years just completely +stop any effort, any goal, any destination. Just forget, and live moment to moment near +me. Don’t do anything. Simply eat, sleep, walk, and just be near me. And don't raise any +question... just see me, my presence. And don't make any effort because nothing is to be +achieved. Forget the achieving mind because the achieving mind is always in the future — +that's why it goes on missing the present. Just forget that you have to achieve anything." +Bokuju believed in his master. He started living with him. For a few days, a few months, +ideas floated in, thoughts came, and sometimes he would become uneasy and would +think, "I am wasting time. I am not doing anything. How can it happen without doing +anything? If it couldn’t happen through such hard effort, how is it going to be easily +attained by not doing anything?" But, still, he believed in the master. By and by the mind +slowed down, and in the present of his master he started to feel a subtle calm flowing — a +silence would fall from the master onto him. + +He started feeling a merging. Years passed. He completely forgot that he was. The master +became the center and he started to live like a shadow. + +Then the miracle is possible — this happening itself is the miracle. One day, suddenly, the +master called his name, "Bokuju, are you here?" Just this, "Bokuju, are you here?" And +he said, "Yes, master." And, it is said, he became enlightened. + +There was nothing like a technique, not even a suggestion — just, "Bokuju, are you +here?" The total presence had been called, "Are you here, not moving anywhere, not gone +somewhere else? With total intensity, are you present here?" And Bokuju said, "Yes, +master." In that "yes" he became totally present there. + +It is said that the master started laughing and Bokuju started laughing, and the master +said, "Now you can go. Now you can move out there and help people by your presence." +Bokuju never taught any method. He would simply ask this much, "Just be near. Remain +present." And whenever a disciple was in tune, he would call the name of the disciple and +ask, "Are you here?" This was the whole technique. + +But this technique will need a grounding of your mind, a deep innocence. There are many +techniques which are simple, the simplest possible: just a saying, "Be this one" — just a +hint. But it must have been said by the master in a certain moment. "Be this one" cannot + + + +always be said. + + +It must have been said in a certain tuning, when the disciple was totally one with the +master, or totally with the universe, merged. Then the master says, "Be this one" — and +suddenly the focus will change and the last part of the ego will dissolve. + +These methods worked in the past but now it is difficult, very difficult, because you are +so calculating, you are so clever. And being clever is just against being innocent. You are +so calculating, you know too much arithmetic. This calculation goes on and on in the +mind: whatsoever you do, it is always calculated, planned. You are never innocent, never +open, receptive; you believe too much in yourself. Hence you go on missing. These +methods won’t be helpful for you unless you prepare. That preparation can be very long, +and you are very impatient. + +This age is basically the most impatient age that has ever happened on this earth. +Everyone is impatient, everyone is too time-conscious, and everyone wants to do +everything immediately. Not that it cannot be done — it can be done immediately. But +with such time-consciousness it is impossible. People come to me and they say that they +have come only for one day. The next day they are going to Sai Baba, and after meeting +him they will go to Rishikesh, and then they will go somewhere else. Then they return +frustrated and they think there is nothing India can give. It is not a question of whether +India can give something or not, the question is always whether you can receive it or not. + +You are in such a hurry and you want something immediately. Just like instant coffee, +you think of instant meditation, instant nirvana. It is not possible. Nirvana cannot be +packed, cannot be made instant. Not that it is impossible to make it instant, it can become +instant — but it can become instant only with the mind which is not after the instant. +That's the problem. It can become instant. Immediately, this moment, it can happen. Not +even a single moment is needed. But only to one who is relaxed about time completely, +to one who can wait for infinity — for him it will happen instantly. + +This looks paradoxical but this is the case. If you can wait for eternity, you will not need +to wait at all. But if you cannot wait for even a single moment, you will have to wait for +eternity. You will have to wait because the mind which says, "Let it happen +immediately," is a mind which has already moved from the moment. It is running, it is +standing nowhere, it is just on the move. A mind which is on the move, on the way, +cannot be innocent. + +You may not be aware of it but innocent people are always without time-consciousness. +Time lingers slowly. There is no hurry to go anywhere, they are not running. They are +enjoying moment to moment. They are chewing each moment. And each moment has its +own ecstasy to deliver. But you are in such a hurry that it cannot be delivered. While you +are here, your hands are in the future, your mind is in the future — you will miss this +moment. + +And this will be always the case; you will always miss the now. And NOW is the only +time! The future is false, the past is just memory. The past is no more, the future is yet to +be — and all that ever happens is the now. Now is the only time. + +So if you can be prepared to slow down a little, to become non-calculating, playing like +children, here and now, then these simple techniques can work miracles. But this century +is too time-conscious. That’s why you ask, IT SEEMS THAT WE NEED TECHNIQUES +TO ACHIEVE THESE TECHNIQUES. No. These are techniques, not end-results. They + + + +look like end-results because you cannot conceive of how they can work. They can work +in particular mind; they cannot work in other types of mind. And really, those who know, +they say that all the techniques will ultimately bring you to the innocence where the +phenomenon happens. When the phenomenon happens, it will be because the techniques +will have brought you to that innocence — if the innocence is there. + +But it is difficult now because nowhere is innocence taught; everywhere we are teaching +cleverness. Universities are not to make you innocent, they are to make you clever, +cunning, calculating. The more clever you are, the better you will be in the struggle of +life. You can gain much wealth, prestige, power, if you are calculating. If you are +innocent, you will prove to be stupid; if you are innocent, then you will be nowhere in +this competitive world. + +This is the problem: in this competitive world you may not be anywhere, but in that non- +competitive world of nirvana, if you are innocent, you will be somewhere. If you are +calculating you will not be anywhere in the world of nirvana, but in this world you will +be somewhere. And we have chosen this world to be our goal. + +Old universities differed completely, their orientation was totally different. Nalanda, +Takshila — they did not teach calculation, they did not teach cleverness. They were +teaching innocence. Their orientation was different from Oxford or Kashi or Cambridge. +Their orientation was totally different — they were creating a different type of mind. So it +almost always happened that a person who studied in Takshshila or Nalanda would +become a BHIKKHU, a SANNYASIN, in the end. By the time he graduated from +university he would renounce this world. Those universities were anti-world; they were +preparing for some other dimension. They were preparing you for something else which +cannot be measured in terms of this world. These techniques were for those type of +people. Either they were innocent by their nature or they were training themselves to be +innocent. + +When Jesus said to his followers, "If someone hits you on one cheek, you give him the +other," what is he intending to do? He is trying to make you innocent. Only a foolish +person would do this. When someone hits you on one cheek, a calculating mind will say, +"Hit him hard, immediately." + +And a really calculating mind will say, "Before someone hits you, hit him. Because +attack is the best defense." Ask Machiavelli — he is the cleverest mind. He says, "Before +someone attacks you, you attack him, because attack is the best defense. Once someone +has attacked you, you are already weak; he has already gained over you. Now the race is +not equal. He is ahead of you. So don’t allow the enemy to go ahead. Attack before +anybody attacks you." + +This is a calculating mind; this is a clever mind. Machiavelli was read by every prince +and every king in medieval Europe — but he was such a clever person that no king would +employ him. He was read — his book was the bible for power-politics, every prince +would read his book The Prince and they would follow it — but no king was ready to +employ him because he was such a clever man. It was better to keep him away — he was +dangerous; he knew too much. He said, "Virtue is not good, but pretending to be virtuous +is. Don’t be virtuous, but pretend always that you are virtuous. That is the real good +because then you gain from both the ends: from vice you gain, and from virtue also." + +This is the calculating mind. Go on pretending that you are virtuous, and always praise +virtue. But never be really virtuous. Always praise virtue so others know that you are a + + + +virtuous person. Always condemn vice — but don’t be afraid to use it. + + +Jesus says, "When someone hits you on one cheek, give him the other. And if someone +takes your coat, snatches it, give him your shirt also. And if someone forces you to carry +his load for one mile, tell him that you are ready to carry it for two miles." This is patent +foolishness, but very meaningful. If you can do this, these techniques will be for you. +Jesus is preparing his disciples for sudden enlightenment. Just think about it. If you can +be so innocent, so trusting, that if the other is hitting you, he must be hitting you for your +good — so give him the other cheek also, and let him hit it. The other's goodness is +believed in, trusted in; no one is your enemy. When Jesus says, "Love your enemies," this +is the meaning. No one is your enemy; don't see the enemy anywhere. That doesn't mean +that there will not be enemies and there will not be people who will exploit you. There +will be. They will exploit you. But be exploited — and don’t be cunning. Just look at that +dimension: be exploited but don’t be cunning. Be exploited but don’t be mistrusting, don’t +disbelieve, don’t lose faith. That is more valuable than anything others can cheat you of. +Nothing else is so valuable. + +But how do our minds function? If one man deceives you, the whole of humanity is evil. +If one man is dishonest or you think that he is dishonest, then you don't believe in man at +all. Then the whole of humanity has become dishonest. + +If one Jew is a miser, then the whole race of Jews is miserly. If one Mohammedan is +bigoted, then all Mohammedans are. Just one is enough for us to lose our faith in all. + +Jesus says, "Even if all are dishonest, you should not lose faith, because faith is more +valuable than what these dishonest people can take from you by their dishonesty." So +really, if you lose faith you are losing something; otherwise nothing is lost. + +For such innocent people these techniques are enough, they will not ask for anything +more. You say, and it happens to them. Just on hearing the master many have become +illumined — but in the past, not in this age. + +I have heard a story about Rinzai. He was a very poor BHIKKHU, a poor SANNYASIN, +a beggar. As he was sleeping in his hut a thief entered. There was nothing in the hut +except a blanket that he himself was using. He was sleeping on the floor, covered with +his blanket. Then he became very uncomfortable and stared to think, "What an +unfortunate fellow! He has come so far from the village to find something, and there is +nothing in my hut. What misery! How to help him? The only thing is this blanket." And +he was under it and the thief would not have the courage to snatch the blanket, so he +slipped out from under it, left it there and slipped into a dark corner. The thief took the +blanket and went away. The night was very cold, but Rinzai was happy that the thief had +not gone back empty-handed. + + +Then he sat at the window of his hut. The night was cool, and the full moon was in the +sky. He wrote a small haiku, a small poem. In the haiku he said, "If I could have given +this moon to that thief, I would have." This mind! What has he lost? Just a blanket. What +has he gained? The whole world, all that can be gained. He has gained innocence, trust, +love. + +For this man no technique is needed. His master would say, "Just look. Be aware. Be +alert." And that would do. + + + +The second question: + +Question 2 + +HOW TO DIFFERENTIATE BETWEEN THE DICTATES OF THE UNCONSCIOUS +MIND AND THAT OF THE INNER GUIDE? HOW CAN ONE RECOGNIZE THAT +THE INNER GUIDE HAS COME INTO FUNCTION? + +The first thing: because of Freud, much misunderstanding has arisen around the word +"unconscious". Freud completely misunderstood it, misinterpreted it. And he has become +the very basis of modern knowledge about mind. To Freud, unconscious meant simply +the repressed conscious, the suppressed part of the conscious. So all that is evil and bad, +immoral, has been suppressed. Because the society cannot allow it, it has to be +suppressed within. For Freud, that repressed part is the unconscious — but not for +mystics. Freud is not a mystic; he has not entered his own unconscious. He has been +simply observing cases of patients: ill people, abnormal people, mad, insane, +pathological. + +He has been studying the pathological mind, and through the study of the pathological +mind — and that, too, from without — he concluded that just underneath the conscious +there is an unconscious mind. That unconscious mind carries all that has been suppressed +from the childhood, all that society has condemned. The mind has suppressed it, just to +forget that it is there. + +But it is there — and it goes on functioning. And it is very powerful: it goes on changing +the conscious, it goes on playing tricks with the conscious. The conscious is really +impotent before it, because whatsoever is repressed is repressed only because it is so +powerful that society cannot cope with it. So society has been repressing it and society +doesn't know what else to do with it. For example, sex. It is so powerful that if you don't +repress it you won't know what to do with it. It will lead you into dangerous paths. And it +is such a forceful energy that the whole society will become chaotic if it is allowed +completely .No marriage could exist, no love could exist, everything could be just a chaos +if it was allowed total freedom — because then man would behave like an animal. If there +were no marriage, no family, the whole society would be destroyed. Society depends on +the unity of the family; the family depends on marriage; marriage depends on sex- +suppression. Everything that is natural, forceful, has been inhibited, tabooed — so forcibly +that you feel guilty about it and you go on fighting with it. + +Society has not only created policemen outside, it has created inner policemen, your +conscience — a double arrangement so that you don’t go astray so that you cannot be +natural, you have to be unnatural. + +Now modern psychologists say that insanity is part of civilization — no civilization can +be without madness. But mad people are suffering because you have forced such an order +over them that their natural instincts are crushed. They have been crippled. It may be that +your madmen are more powerful than you, that's why their inner instincts have revolted +and they have thrown their conscience, their mind, everything, overboard. That’s why +they are mad. A better concept of humanity, a better organization, a better discipline with +more knowledge and wisdom, may use them. They may prove geniuses; they may prove +very talented people. They are. But they have such a force in them that they cannot +repress themselves. And society will not allow them to move because they are wild. + +Freud came to the conclusion that civilization needs the unconscious, the repressed part. + + + +But really, for Tantra and yoga this unconscious is not the unconscious, it is just between +the conscious and the unconscious, a small boundary. It is subconscious. The conscious +has forced something down, but the conscious knows about it. It is not really +unconscious, you know about it. You may not want to recognize it, you may not want to +be attentive to it, because you are afraid that if you give it attention it will come up. + +You have forced it into darkness but you are conscious bout it. The Freudian unconscious +is not really unconscious, it is only subconscious. It is not dark night, it is in the light, +you can see it. + +Tantra talks about the real unconscious which is not suppressed by you but which is your +deepest being. And your conscious is just one part of it which has come into light, the +one-tenth part which has seen the light, which has become conscious. Nine parts, nine- +tenths, are just hidden underneath. That unconscious is really your source of life-energy, +of being. Your conscious mind is one-tenth of the whole mind and this conscious mind +has created its own center: that center is the ego. This center is false because it doesn’t +belong to the whole mind, it is not the center of the whole mind. It is just a center of the +conscious part, a fragment. The fragment has created its own center and that center goes +on pretending it is the center of the whole being. No, your total mind has a center: that +center is called the guide. That center is in the unconscious and it will be revealed only +when five fragments, or half of the mind, come into light. Then the center which is the +guide will be revealed. It is hidden in the unconscious. + +So you need not be afraid of the unconscious; it is the Freudian unconscious you are +afraid of. It is something to be afraid of. But this Freudian unconscious can be thrown out +in catharsis. + +Hence my great insistence on catharsis. This Freudian unconscious can be thrown out in +catharsis: whatsoever you wanted to do and you have not done, do it, meditatively. Don’t +do it to anyone because that will create a chain of events — and you will not be in control. +Just do it in a vacuum. If you are angry, do it in a vacuum. If you feel sexuality, throw it +into the sky. If you feel anything, just allow it to move from your inwards outwards. +Express it. A meditative catharsis will relieve you of the Freudian unconscious. With the +technique that I am teaching — if it is followed — the Freudian unconscious will simply +disappear. And only when this Freudian unconscious disappears can you penetrate the +real unconscious. It is just in-between, between the conscious and the unconscious. You +just go on throwing your rubbish things into a room and you close it; you go on +accumulating a junkyard — Freudian unconscious is just a junkyard. Don’t throw it in — I +say, throw it out. When it moves in, you will become pathological, you can go insane. +When it moves out you will become fresh, young, unburdened. For this age, catharsis is a +must. No one can reach the inner guide without catharsis. And once you are in deep +catharsis you need not be afraid. Then the real unconscious will start revealing itself; then +it will penetrate into your conscious, and then for the first time you will become aware of +your vast territory. + +You are not such a small fragment, you have a very vast being, and this vast being has a +center — that center is the inner guide. + +How to differentiate between the unconscious and the inner guide? How to differentiate +between the Freudian unconscious and the inner guide? It will be difficult if you don’t go +through catharsis. But you can feel a difference by and by because the Freudian + + + +unconscious is just a repressed thing. If something appears in you with a violent force, +know well that this violent force is coming because you have repressed it in the first +place. If something simply appears in you without any violence, just bubbles up silently, +easily, without any sounds, even soundlessly, then know that this is the real unconscious. +From the guide something is coming to you. But you will become proficient only when +you go through catharsis. Then you will know what is happening. Whenever anything +comes from the Freudian unconscious you will feel disturbed, it will make you uneasy, +uncomfortable; and whenever something comes from the guide you will feel such +serenity, you will feel so happy, so at ease, so at home, that you cannot imagine it. You +will simply feel that this is the thing. Your total being is in harmony with it, there is no +resistance. You know this is the right, this is the good, this is the truth — and nobody can +convince you otherwise. With the Freudian unconscious you can never be serene, you can +never be still and calm; you will be disturbed. + +It is a sort of disease that has come up — and there will be a fight with it. So it is better if +you pass through deep catharsis, then the Freudian unconscious will become silent, by +and by. + +And just as bubbles come up from a riverbed, come up to the very surface of the water, +you will feel bubbles coming up from the very bed of your being. They will come to your +conscious mind. But their very coming will give you a deep tranquility — a feeling that +nothing can be more right than this. But before it happens you have to unburden yourself +of the Freudian unconscious. And that can happen only if you are in a let-go, because the +innennost being is so nonviolent that it will not assert itself. The Freudian unconscious +will want to assert itself; every moment it is trying to assert itself and you are pushing it +back. This is the difference. It wants to assert itself, it wants to become active, it wants to +lead you somewhere, it wants to manipulate you — and you are resisting it, fighting it. + +The real unconscious, the guide, is not assertive. If you allow it, if you invite it, +prayerfully, it will come to you just like an invited guest. You have to be in a let-go. Only +then will it come. When it feels you are ready, when it feels it will not be denied, +rejected, when it feels it will be welcomed, then it will come to you. So, you have to do +two things: catharsis for the Freudian unconscious, and training in let-go and surrender +for the real guide, the real unconscious. + +These two things done, you will know the difference. + +The difference really cannot be taught to you — you will know it. When it happens, you +will know it. How do you know the difference between when there is pain in your body +and when the whole body feels a well-being? When the whole body is filled with well- +being and when your head has a headache, how do you feel what the difference is? You +simply know it. Y ou cannot define it, you simply know it: you know what a headache is +and you know what well-being is. + +The real guide will always give you a feeling of well-being, and the Freudian +unconscious will always give you a feeling of headache. It is a turmoil, it is an inner +conflict, it is anguish, it is pain suppressed. So whenever it comes you will feel painful all +over. + +Because of this Freudian unconscious, many things have become painful which are not +naturally painful For example, sex. Because society has repressed sex, it has become +painful. One of the most blissful things in natural life is sex. But it has become painful. If +you move into sex you will feel frustrated, you will feel guilty, at the end you will feel + + + +weakened. And you will decide never to have sex again. This is not because of natural +sex, this is because of the unconscious. Sex has become painful. It has been so repressed +that it has become ugly and painful Otherwise it is one of the most natural ecstasies. + +If a child is never taught that sex is bad and a sin he will enjoy it, and every time he will +feel a deep well-being flowing all over the body. + +Men feel more well-being than women — because women are repressed more. No one +requires that a boy should be a virgin but everyone requires, even the boy himself, that +the girl he is going to marry should be a virgin. Even playboys require that the girl should +be a virgin. Women's unconscious has been repressed ore than men's, that's why only a +few women achieve orgasm. And that, too, in the West — in the east not more than five +per cent of women, at the most, achieve any enjoyment in sex. Ninety-five percent are +simply fed up with it. That's why when sadhus and monks teach that sex is sin, women +always agree. They gather in multitudes around monks because the thing appeals to them, +it is right. Because they are so suppressed they have never known any bliss out of it. In +India, while making love, woman are not supposed to move, be active. They have to lie +still like a corpse. If they are active their man will become suspicious: they are enjoying +sex and this is not the sign of a good woman. A good woman is one who doesn’t enjoy. In +the East they will say that if you want to marry, marry a good woman, and if you want to +enjoy, then have a friendship with a bad woman — because only bad women can enjoy. +This is unfortunate. The woman is not supposed to move, to be active, she should be just +dead. + +How can she achieve orgasm when the energy is not moving? + +And if she cannot enjoy it she is bound to be against the husband and she is bound to +think that the husband is evil. Every day Indian women come to me and they say that +they are fed up with sex and their husbands are forcing them again and again to have sex. +They don’t like it, they are disgusted. And why are the husbands not so disgusted? Why +are the women disgusted? The reason is that they have a greater repressed unconscious +about sex than men. + +Sex will become painful. If you have suppressed it, it is a headache. Anything can +become a headache — just suppress it, that is the trick. It will become a suffering. And +anything can become blissful — just express it, don’t suppress it. + +This Freudian unconscious is all that you know right now. You don’t know about the real +unconscious, the Tantra unconscious — that's why you are afraid. And afraid, you cannot +let go. Afraid, you cannot lose control. You know that if you lose control, immediately +the suppressed instincts will take over. Immediately, whatsoever you have repressed will +come to the mind and it will insist on being acted out. That's why you are afraid. + +Catharsis is needed first so the fear goes. And then you can let go. And if you let go, a +very silent force will start flowing to your conscious mind and you will feel a well-being, +you will feel that you are at home, you will feel that everything is good, you will feel that +you are blessed. + + +HOW CAN ONE RECOGNIZE THAT THE INNER GUIDE HAS COME INTO +FUNCTION? This will be the first sign: you will start feeling good, good about yourself. +Remember, you always feel bad about yourself. I almost never come across a person who +feels good about himself. Everyone is condemning himself, everyone thinks he is bad. + + + +And when you think you are bad how do you suppose that someone else is going to love +you? And when no one loves you, you feel frustrated. But you yourself don’t love you. +You have never touched your hand lovingly, you have never felt your body lovingly, you +have never thanked God that he has given you such a beautiful body, such a beautiful +organism. No, you just feel disgusted. And the religions, the so-called religions have +taught you to feel condemned — this body is a bag of sins. You are carrying a burden. +When the unconscious is released you will feel suddenly that you are accepted, you are +not bad. Nothing is bad. The whole of life becomes deep down a blessing. You feel +blessed. And the moment you feel blessed, all others around you become blessed; you +can bless them, you can feel happy. Because you feel condemned, you feel bad about +yourself and you think the same about others. How can you love another's body if you +condemn your own body? If you are against your own body, how can you love another +body? You will condemn — deep down you will condemn. + +Really, religions have prepared you to become just ghosts. They don’t want you to be +with the body, they want you to be just unembodied spirits. Everything has been so +condemned. .and you have taken it for granted. I have seen in scriptures, in many +scriptures, that it written that your body has nothing but blood, fat, phlegm — just to +condemn it. I don’t know what these persons who were writing these scriptures wanted. +Did they want gold to be there? Why is blood bad? Blood is life! But they have +condemned it and we have accepted the condemnation. They must be mad, insane. + +Jains always say that their TEERTHANKARAS never urinated, they don’t defecate. Such +bad things. But why is urine bad? What do you want to urinate instead of urine? And +what is bad in it? But it is such a bad thing. And psychologists say that because the sex +center and the urinating organ are the same in man, sex has become condemned. And in +woman the sex center is just in the middle, on one side defecation and on the other side +urination, sex cannot be good if it is between two such bad things. The condemnation of +sex has come because we have condemned defecation. But why? Why condemn it? What +is bad? But we accept condemnation and when we accept, then there are problems. + +Your whole body is condemned by neurotic people. They may have written scriptures but +that doesn’t make any difference. They may have been great leaders — neurotics almost +always are. + +They are great leaders because they are so fanatic that they can immediately get a +following. And there are always people who worship fanaticism. Anyone who says +something strongly will have people falling at his feet saying he is the right leader, and +he may be just neurotic, just mad. These neurotic people have condemned you and you +have accepted them, you have been conditioned by them. + +When the unconscious flows in you, a subtle well-being will come. You will feel good: +everything is good, and everything is Divine. Your body comes from the Divine, your +blood also, your urine also. Everything is Divine. When the unconscious flows in you, +everything is Divine, everything becomes spiritual. Nothing is bd, nothing is condemned. +This will be the feeling, and then you will fly. You will become so light you cannot walk. +Then nothing is a burden on your head. Then you can enjoy small things in a very great +way. Then every trivial things becomes a beauty. But that beauty is given by you — +whatsoever you touch becomes golden because deep down you are so fdled with bliss. +This will be the first thing that will happen to you — a goodness about yourself. And, +when the unconscious starts flowing into your conscious, the second thing will be that + + + +you will become less world-oriented, less intellectual, more total. Then if you are happy +you will not just simply say that you are happy — you will dance. + +Just saying, "I am happy," is pale, meaningless. I see people who say, "I am happy" — but +just look at their faces! I know people who say, "I love you," but their body is not +expressing anything. Words are dead but we have substituted them for life. When the +unconscious flows in you, this will be the difference: you will live with your total being. +When you feel happy, you will dance. Then you will not simply say, "I am happy"-you +will be happy: that's the difference. You will not say, "I am happy" — there is no need to +say it because you will be happy. Then there will be no need to say to someone, "I love +you" — you will be love. Your whole being will show the feeling, you will vibrate with +love. Anybody passing nearby will feel that you love; anyone just touched by your hand +will feel a subtle energy has entered into him. There is a wannth in your presence, a +happiness. + +This will be the second thing. First, you will feel a goodness about yourself and about +everything; and second, you will become total. When the guide takes you, you will be +total. + +The third question: + +Question 3 + +WHEN THAT INTUITION STARTS FUNCTIONING, IS SURRENDER THE ONLY +TECHNIQUE FOR THAT INTUITION, OR THE INNER GUIDE? DOES A PERSON +LIVING THROUGH INTUITION ALWAYS SUCCEED? HOW DO YOU VALUE +SUCCESS AND FAILURE? IS IT NOT TRUE THAT THE PERSON LIVING +INTUITIVELY WILL BECOME WEAK INTELLECTUALLY? + +Surrender is the only technique for the inner being to become active. + + +DOES A PERSON LIVING THROUGH INTUITION ALWAYS SUCCEED? No, but +he is always happy — whether he succeeds or not. And a person not living intuitively is +always unhappy whether he succeeds or not. Success is not the criterion because success +depends on many things. Happiness is the criterion because happiness depends only on +you. You may not succeed because others are competitors there. Even if you are working +intuitively, others may be working more cunningly, more cleverly, more calculatingly, +more violently, more immorally. So success depends on many other things; success is a +social phenomenon. You may not succeed. + +Who can say that Jesus succeeded? Crucifixion is not a success, it is the greatest failure. + +A man crucified when he was just thirty-three — what type of success is this? No one +knew about him. Just a few villagers, uneducated people, were his disciples. He had no +position, no prestige, no power. What type of success is this? Crucifixion cannot be said +to be a success. But he was happy. He was totally blissful — even when being crucified. +And those who were crucifying him would remain alive for many years but they would +remain in misery. So really, who was undergoing crucifixion? That is the point. Those +who crucified Jesus, were they undergoing crucifixion? Or was Jesus, who was crucified? +He was happy. How can you crucify happiness? He was ecstatic. + + +How can you crucify ecstasy? You can kill the body but you cannot kill the soul. Those + + + +who crucified him, they lived, but their life was nothing but a long slow crucifixion — +misery and misery and misery. + +So the first thing is that I don’t say that if you follow the inner guide you will always +succeed — in the sense that the world recognizes success; but in the sense that a Buddha +or a Jesus recognizes success, you will succeed. But that success is measured by your +happiness, your bliss — whatsoever happens is irrelevant, you will be happy. Whether the +world says that you have been a failure, or the world makes you a star, a success, it +doesn't make any difference. You will be happy whatsoever the case; you will be blissful. +Bliss is success to me. If you can understand that bliss is success, then I say you will +succeed always. + +But to you bliss is not success; success is something else. It may even be misery. Even if +you know that it is going to be a misery, you long for success. Ask political leaders — +they are in misery. I have not seen any political leader who is happy. They are just +miserable, but still they are trying for higher posts, trying to get still higher on the ladder. +And those who are already above him are in misery, and he knows it. But we are ready to +be miserable if success comes to us. So what is success to us? Success is egoistic +fulfillment, not bliss. + +It is just so that people will say that you have succeeded. You may have lost everything — +you may have lost your soul; you may have lost all that innocence that gives bliss; you +may have lost all that peace, silence, that brings you nearer to the Divine; you may have +lost all, and become just a madman — but the world will say you are a success. + +For the world, ego gratification is the success; for me it is not. For me, to be blissful is +success — whether anyone knows about you or not. It is irrelevant whether anyone knows +about you or not, whether you live totally unknown, unheard of, unnoticed. But if you are +blissful, you have succeeded. + +So remember this distinction because there are many people who would like to be +intuitive, who would like to find the inner guide, just to succeed in the world. For them +the inner guide will be a frustration. In the first place, they cannot find it. In the second +place, even if they can find it, they will be miserable. Because what they are aiming at is +recognition by the world, ego fulfillment — not bliss. + +Be clear in the mind — don’t be success-oriented. Success is the greatest failure in the +world. So don’t try to succeed otherwise you will be a failure. Think of being blissful. +Every moment think of being more and more blissful. Then the whole world may say you +are a failure but you will not be a failure. You have attained. + + +Buddha was a failure in the eyes of his friends, family, wife, father, teachers, society — he +was a failure. He had become just a beggar. What type of success is this? He could have +been a great emperor: he had the qualities, he had the personality, he had the mind. He +could have been a great emperor but he became a beggar. He was a failure — obviously. +But I say to you he was not a failure. If he had become an emperor then he would have +been a failure because he would have missed the real life. What he attained under the +Bodhi Tree was the real and what he lost was unreal. + +With the real you will succeed in the inner life; with the unreal... I don’t know. If you +want to succeed in the unreal then follow the path of those who are working in +cunningness, cleverness, competition, jealousy, violence. Follow their path, the inner +guide is not for you. If you want to gain something of the world, then don't listen to the + + + +inner guide. + +But ultimately you will feel that although you have won the whole world, you have lost +yourself. Jesus says, "And what does a man get if he loses his soul and gains the whole +world?" Who will you call a success: Alexander the Great or Jesus the Crucified? So if — +and that 'if has to be understood well — if you are interested in the world, then the inner +guide is not a guide for you. If you are interested in the inner dimension of being then the +inner guide, and only the inner guide, can help. + + +THE END. + + + +Chapter 79: Sunyawad -- the philosophy of emptiness + + +SUPPOSE YOUR PASSIVE FORM TO BE AN EMPTY ROOM WITH WALLS OF +SKIN - EMPTY. + +GRACIOUS ONE, PLAY. THE UNIVERSE IS AN EMPTY SHELL WHEREIN YOUR +MIND FROLICS INFINITELY. + +SWEET HEARTED ONE, MEDITATE ON KNOWING AND NOT-KNOWING, +EXISTING AND NOT-EXISTING. THEN LEAVE BOTH ASIDE THAT YOU MAY +BE. + +ENTER SPACE, SUPPORTLESS, ETERNAL, STILL. + +These techniques are concerned with emptiness — they are the most delicate, the most +subtle. Even to conceive of emptiness seems impossible. Buddha used all these four +techniques for his disciples and BHIKKHUS, and because of these four techniques he +was totally misunderstood. Buddhism got completely uprooted from Indian soil just +because of these four techniques. + +Buddha said that there is no God. If there is God, you cannot be totally empty. You may +not be there but the God will be there, the Divine will be there. And your mind can +deceive you, because your Divine may be just your mind playing tricks. Buddha said that +there is no soul, because if there is any soul, ATMA, you can hide your ego behind it. +Your ego will be difficult to leave if you feel that there is some self within you. Then you +cannot be totally empty because you will be there. + +Just to prepare the ground for these techniques of emptiness, Buddha denied everything. +He was not an atheist but he appeared to be an atheist because he said that there is no +God, he said there is no soul, he said there is nothing substantial in existence — existence +is empty. + +But this was just to prepare the ground for these techniques. Once you enter emptiness +you have entered all — you may call it the Divine, you may call it God, or ATMA, soul, +whatsoever you like — but you can enter the truth only when you are totally empty. +Nothing should be left of you. + +Hindus thought that Buddha was destroying religion, that he was teaching irreligion. And +people who heard him, even they couldn’t follow, because whenever you go somewhere, +you go to seek something — you never go to seek emptiness. So those who went to hear +him were seeking something — nirvana, moksha, the other world, heaven, truth — but +they were seeking something. They had come to gratify their ultimate desire: to find the +truth. That is the last desire. And unless you are completely desireless, you cannot know +the truth; the very condition of knowing is to be totally desireless. + +So one thing is certain, you cannot desire truth. If you desire it, the very desire will +become the barrier. There were masters before Buddha who were teaching, "Don't desire, +be desireless." But they were talking about God, about the kingdom of God, heaven, +paradise, moksha, the ultimate freedom and liberation — and they were saying, "Be +desireless." Buddha felt that you cannot be desireless if there is something to be attained. +You may pretend that you are desireless, but this pretension, desirelessness, is also from +some desire to be fulfilled. + + + +It is false. The masters say that you cannot attain to ultimate bliss with desire, and you +want to attain ultimate bliss — so you start being desireless, you try to be desireless, so +that you can attain the ultimate bliss. But the desire is there. You are trying to be +desireless just because of the desire. So Buddha said that there is no God to be attained. +Even if you desire, there is no one to be attained... so be desireless. There is no moksha +somewhere, there is no goal. Life is meaningless and goal-less. + +His emphasis is beautiful and wonderful — no one has tried that way. He destroyed all the +goals just to help you to be desireless. If the goals are there, how can you be desireless? +And if you are not desireless, you will not attain to the goal — this is the paradox. He +destroyed all the goals — not that those goals are not there, they are there and they can be +attained — but if you want to attain them, if you desire to attain them, it becomes +impossible. The very basic condition is you must be desireless — then the ultimate +happens to you. So Buddha says there is nothing to be desired, desires are futile. Drop all +desires and when there is no desire you will be empty. + +Just imagine, if there is no desire within you, what will you be? You are nothing but a +bundle of desires. If all desires go, you simply disappear. Not that you will not exist — +you will exist, but as an emptiness. + +You will be there, just like a vacant room: no one is there, just a SUNYA, a nothingness. +Buddha has called this nothingness ANATMA, ANATTA, no-soulness. You will not feel +any center, that "I am"; there will be just "am-ness", no "I" to it, because "I" is nothing +but accumulated desires, condensed desires, crystallized desires — many, many desires +have become your "I". + +It is just as in physics. Physicists say that if you analyze matter, then matter is nothing but +atoms; there is nothing to join the atoms, each atom is surrounded by vacant space. If you +have a rock in your hand, there is no rock, just atoms of energy, and between two atoms, +infinite space. Even a rock is spacious, porous. They say that soon we will be able to pull +that space out from anything. + +H.G. Wells has written a story. + +In the twenty-first century, a passenger starts calling for coolies in a big station. Other +passengers who are traveling in the same compartment with this passenger cannot +understand, because he has no luggage, just a packet of cigarettes and a small matchbox. +That is all his luggage. And he goes on calling for coolies. A big group gathers and a +passenger asked, "Why? Why are you calling? You don't have anything. You can carry +this matchbox and this packet of cigarettes yourself. What are you going to do with these +two dozen coolies?" The passenger laughs and he says, "Try, try that matchbox. + +That matchbox is not ordinary. One railway engine is condensed into it." + +It is possible soon. Space can be pulled out and then it can be again forced in, and the +engine will take its shape again. Then big things can be carried without much problem. +The weight will remain the same but the shape, the form, will become smaller and +smaller. A matchbox can contain a railway engine, but the weight will remain the same, +because space has no weight. Y ou can pull out the space but you cannot pull out the +weight. The weight will remain the same because weight is contained by the atoms, not +by the space. They say that the whole earth can be condensed into the form, the shape, of +one apple, but the weight will remain the same. And if you pull apart all these atoms; if +you take one atom out, and then another, and then another; if you take all the atoms out, +nothing will be left behind — so matter is just an appearance. + + + +Buddha has analyzed the human mind in a simpler way: he is one of the greatest +scientists possible. He says your ego is nothing but desires, atomic desires. There are +millions of desires; they make you. If you go on pulling out desires one by one, a moment +will come when there is no desire left, you have disappeared... just space, just vacant +space remains. And this, Buddha says, is nirvana. This is the cessation of your being +completely; you are no more. And Buddha says this is silence: unless you are completely +gone, silence cannot descend on you. + +Buddha says you cannot be silent because you are the problem; you cannot be peaceful +because you are the disease; and you can never be blissful because you are the only +barrier. The bliss can come at any moment but you are the barrier. When you are not, +bliss will be there; when you are not, peace will be there; when you are not, silence will +be there, when you are not, ecstasy will be there. When your inner being is totally empty, +this emptiness itself is bliss. That's why Buddha's teachings are called SUNYAWAD, the +philosophy of emptiness, or the philosophy of zero. + +These four techniques are to attain this state of being, or you can call it this state of no- +being — there is no difference. You can give it a positive term, as Hindus and Jains have +called it, soul, or you can give it a more appropriate but negative term, as Buddha has +called it, ANATTA, no-selfness or no-soulness. It depends on you. But whatsoever you +call it, there is no one to be named and called, there is just infinite space. That's why I say +that these are the ultimate techniques, the most delicate, the most difficult — but the most +wonderful. And if you can work with any of these four techniques, you will gain the +unattainable. + +The first technique: + +SUPPOSE YOUR PASSIVE FORM TO BE AN EMPTY ROOM WITH WALLS OF +SKIN - EMPTY. + +SUPPOSE YOUR PASSIVE FORM TO BE AN EMPTY ROOM WITH WALLS OF +SKIN. + +.. but inside, everything empty. This is one of the most beautiful techniques. Just sit in a +meditative posture, relaxed, alone, your backbone straight and the whole body relaxed — +as if the whole body is hanging on the backbone. Then close your eyes. For a few +moments go on feeling relaxed, more relaxed, becoming calmer and calmer and calmer. +Do this for a few moments, just to be in tune. And then suddenly start feeling your body +is just walls of skin and there is nothing inside, there is no one inside, the house is vacant. +Sometimes you will feel thoughts passing, clouds of thoughts moving, but don’t think that +they belong to you. You are not. Just think that they are roaming in a vacant sky — they +don't belong to anyone, they don’t have any roots. + +Really this is the case: thoughts are just like clouds moving in the sky. They don’t have +any roots and they don’t belong to the sky, they simply roam in the sky. They come and +they go and the sky remains untouched, uninfluenced. Feel that your body is just walls of +skin and there is no one inside. Thoughts will still continue — because of old habit, old +momentum, old cooperation, thoughts will go on coming. But just think that they are +rootless clouds moving in space — they don’t belong to you, they don’t belong to anybody +else. There is no one to whom they can belong — you are empty. It will be difficult, but +because of the old habits, nothing else. + + + +Your mind would like to catch some thought, be identified with it, move with it, enjoy it, +indulge in it. Resist! Just say there is no one to indulge, there is no one to fight, there is +no one to do anything with this thought. Within a few days, a few weeks, thoughts will +slow down, they will become less and less. The clouds will start disappearing, or, even if +they come, there will be great gaps of cloudless sky when there will be no thought. One +thought will pass. Then another will not come for a period. Then another will come and +then there will again be an interval. In those intervals you will know for the first time +what emptiness is. And the very glimpse of it will fill you with such deep bliss you +cannot imagine. + +Really it is difficult to say anything about it, because whatsoever is said in language will +refer to you, and you will not be there. If I say that you will be filled with happiness it +will be nonsense. You will not be there, so how can I say you will be filled with +happiness? Happiness will be there. Just within the four walls of your skin, happiness +will be there, vibrating — but you will not be there. A deep silence will descend on you, +because if you are not, no one can create a disturbance. You always go on thinking that +somebody else is disturbing you; the traffic noise on the road, children playing around +you, the wife working in the kitchen... somebody is disturbing you. + +Nobody is disturbing you; you are the cause of the disturbance. Because you are there, +anything can disturb you. If you are not there, then disturbances will come and pass +through the emptiness without touching it. You are there — very touchy, a wound; +anything immediately hurts you. + +I have heard about a scientific story. It happened after the third world war that all were +dead; now there was no one on the earth, only trees and hills were there. One big tree +thought to create a great noise, as it used to create in the past. It fell down from a big +rock, it did everything that was possible, but there was no noise. Because for noise your +ears are needed, for sound your ears are needed. If you re not there, sound cannot be +created. It is impossible. I am speaking here. I am making sound because you are here. If +no one is here, I may go on speaking, but sound cannot be created. But I can create it +myself because I myself can hear it. If no one is there to hear, sound cannot be crated, +because sound is a reaction of your ears. + +If no one is there on the earth, the sun will rise but it cannot create light. It seems absurd. +We cannot conceive of it because we always think that the sun will rise and there will be +light. Your eyes are needed. Without your eyes, the sun cannot create light. It may go on +rising but it will be futile because the rays will pass in emptiness. + +There will be no one who can react and who can say that this is light. Light is a +phenomenon of your eyes. You react. Sound is a phenomenon of your ears. You react. +What do you think... a rose is there in the garden, but if no one passes, will there be +perfume? A rose alone cannot create perfume. Impossible. You and your nose are needed +— someone to react and interpret that this is perfume, this is rose-perfume. However hard +a rose tries, without a nose it will not be a rose at all. + +The disturbance on the street is not there really, it is within your ego. Your ego reacts and +says that this is a disturbance. It is your interpretation. Sometimes in a different mood +you may enjoy it. Then it will not be a disturbance. You may enjoy it in a different mood. +And then you will say, "This is beautiful. What music!" But in a sad moment even music +will become a disturbance. But if you are not there, just space, emptiness, there can be +neither disturbance nor music. Things will just pass through you, unnoticed. Because + + + +unstruck, there is no wound to react, there is no one to respond; not even an ego will be +created. This is what Buddha calls nirvana. + +And this technique can help you. + +SUPPOSE YOUR PASSIVE FORM TO BE AN EMPTY ROOM WITH WALLS OF +SKIN — EMPTY. Sit in a passive state, inactive, not doing anything.... Because whenever +you do something the doer comes in. + +Really there is no doer. Only because of the doing you imagine that there is one. Buddha +is difficult only because of this. Only because of linguistic forms have problems arisen. +We say a man is walking. If you analyze this sentence, it means that there is someone +who is walking. But Buddha says there is only a process of walking, there is no one who +is walking. You are laughing. Because of language it appears that there is someone who +is laughing. Buddha says there is laughter but no one inside who is laughing. When you +laugh, remember this, and find out who laughs. You will never find anyone — there is +simply laughter. There is no one behind it doing it. When you are sad, there is no one +who is sad, there is simply sadness. Look at this. Simply sadness. It is a process: simply +laughter, simply happiness, simply unhappiness. There is no one behind it. + +Only because of language do we go on thinking in terms of two. If there is movement, we +say there must be someone who has moved — the mover. We cannot conceive of +movement alone. But have you ever see the mover? Have you ever seen the one who +laugh? Buddha says there is life, the process of life, but no one inside who is alive. And +then there is death, but no one dying. For Buddha you are not a duality — the language +creates a duality. I am speaking, there is no one who is speaking. It is a process. It +belongs to no one. + + +But for us this is difficult because our mind is deeply rooted in dualism. Whenever we +think of some activity, we conceive of some actor inside, some doer. That's why a +passive, inactive form is good in meditation because then you can fall into emptiness +more easily. Buddha says, "Don’t meditate. Be in meditation." The difference is vast. I +will repeat. Buddha says, "Don’t meditate. Be in meditation." Because if you meditate, +the doer has come in — you will go on thinking that you are meditating. Then meditation +has become an act. Buddha says, "Be in meditation." That means be totally passive, don’t +do anything, and don't think that there is any doer. That's why sometimes, when the doer +is lost in the doing, you feel a sudden upsurge of happiness. It comes because you have +become one. With a dancer a moment comes when dance takes over the dancer +disappears — then happens a sudden blessing, a sudden beatitude, a sudden ecstasy. He is +filled with unknown bliss. What has happened? Only the doing remained and the doer +was no more. + +At the war-front, soldiers sometimes attain to very deep bliss. It is difficult to conceive of +because they are so near death — at any moment they can die. In the beginning it makes +them afraid; they tremble in fear. But you cannot continue trembling and fearing every +day, continuously. One becomes accustomed, one accepts death — then the fear +disappears. + +And when death is so near and with any wrong movement you may be dead immediately, +the doer is forgotten, and only duty remains, only doing remains. And one has to be so +deeply in the doing that one cannot go on remembering that "I am". That "I am" will + + + +create trouble. You will miss. You will not be totally in the activity. And life is at stake +so you cannot afford duality. Action becomes total. When action is total, you suddenly +feel you are happy as you have never been before. Warriors have kn own very deep +springs of joy that ordinary life cannot give to you. That may be the reason why war is so +appealing. And that may be the reason why KSHATRIYAS, warriors, have attained to +moksha more than brahmins; because brahmins are always thinking and thinking — much +mental activity. Twenty-four Jain TEERTHANKARAS, Ram, Krishna, Buddha, were all +KSHATRIYAS, warriors. They have attained to the highest peak. + +No businessman has ever been heard to attain to that peak. He lives in such security that +he can afford to be dual. Whatsoever he is doing, it is never total. Profit cannot be a total +activity. You can enjoy it, but it is never a life-and-death problem. You can play with it, +but nothing is at stake. It is a game. A business is playing a game, the game of money. + +The game is not very dangerous so businessmen almost always remain mediocre.. Even a +gambler may attain to higher peaks of bliss than a businessman, because a gambler +moves into danger. + +He stakes everything that he has got — in that moment of total stake the doer is lost. + +That may be the reason why gambling is so appealing, war is so appealing. As far as I +understand, behind whatsoever is appealing, there must be some ecstasy lurking +somewhere, some hint of the unknown somewhere, some glimpse of the deep mystery of +life hidden somewhere there. Otherwise nothing can be appealing. + +Passivity.... Any posture that you take in meditation should be passive. In India we have +evolved the most passive ASANA, the most passive posture, that is SIDDHASANA. And +the beauty of it is that in this SIDDHASANA posture, as Buddha sits, the body is in the +deepest of passive states. Even while lying down you are not so passive; even while +sleeping, your posture is not so passive, it is active. Why is a SIDDHASANA so passive? +For many reasons. In this posture the body is locked, closed. The body has an electric +circle: when the circle is closed and locked, the electricity moves round and round inside +the body, it does not leak out. Now it is a proved scientific phenomenon that in certain +postures your body leaks energy. When the body is leaking energy, it has to create energy +continuously. It is active. The body dynamo has to work continuously because you are +leaking. When energy is leaking from the outside body, the inside body has to be active +to replace it. So the most passive state will be when no energy is leaking. + + +Now in Western countries, particularly in England, they treat patients just by making a +circle of their body electricity. In may hospitals these techniques are being used and they +are very helpful. A person lies on the floor on a net of wires. The net of wires is just to +make a circle of his body electricity. Just half an hour is enough, and he will feel so +relaxed, so filled with energy, so strong, that he cannot believe that when he came he was +so weak. + +In all the old cultures, people used to sleep in a particular direction in the night just so +that energy didn’t leak out — because the earth has a magnetic force. To use that magnetic +force you have to lie in a particular direction — then the force in the earth will magnetize +you the whole night. If you are lying opposite to it the force is fighting with you and your +energy will be destroyed. Many people in the morning feel very depressed, very +weakened. This should not be so, because sleep is meant to rejuvenate you, to give you +more energy. But there are many people who are energetic when they go to bed but in the + + + +morning they are just dead. There can be many reasons for it but this may be one: they +are lying in the wrong direction. If they are lying against the earth magnet they will feel +dissipated. + +So now scientists say that the body has an electric circuit which can be locked, and they +have studied many yogis sitting in SIDDHASANA. + +In that state the body is leaking the minimum energy; energy is preserved. When energy +is preserved the inner batteries need not work, there is no need for any activity. So the +body is passive. In this passivity, you can become more empty than if you are active. + +In this SIDDHASANA posture your backbone is straight and the whole body is also +straight. Now many studies have been done. When your body is straight, totally straight, +you are least influenced by the gravitation of the earth. That's why if you sit in a posture +which is inconvenient, which you call inconvenient, the inconvenience is caused because +your body is affected by more gravitation. If you are sitting straight then gravitation is +least effective, because it can pull only your backbone, nothing else. That's why it is +difficult to sleep while standing. It is almost impossible to sleep while standing in a +SHIRS HAS ANA, on your head. For sleep you have to lie down. Why? Because then the +earth has the maximum pull on you — and the maximum pull makes you unconscious. For +sleep you have to lie down on the ground, so the earth's gravitation touches the whole of +your body and pulls every cell of it. Then you become unconscious. Animals are more +unconscious than man because they cannot stand erect. Evolutionists say that man could +evolve because he could stand erect, on two feet. The gravitation pull is less. Because of +that he could become a little more aware. + + +In siddhasana, the gravitational pull is at its minimum. The body is inactive and passive, +closed inside, it has become a world unto itself. Nothing is moving out, nothing is +coming in .Eyes are closed, hands are locked, feet are locked — energy moves in a circle. +And whenever energy moves in a circle, it creates an inner rhythm, an inner music. The +more you hear that music, the more you feel relaxed. + +SUPPOSE YOUR PASSIVE FORM TO BE AN EMPTY ROOM - just like an empty +room — WITH WALLS OF SKIN — EMPTY. Go on dropping into that emptiness. A +moment will come sometime when you feel everything has disappeared; that there is no +one, nobody, the house is vacant, the lord of the house has disappeared, evaporated. In +that gap, in that interval, when you are not present inside, the Divine will be present. +When you are not, God is. When you are not, bliss is. So try to disappear. Try to +disappear from within. + +The second technique: + +GRACIOUS ONE, PLAY. THE UNIVERSE IS AN EMPTY SHELL WHEREIN YOUR +MIND FROLICS INFINITELY. + +GRACIOUS ONE, PLAY. THE UNIVERSE IS AN EMPTY SHELL WHEREIN YOUR +MIND FROLICS INFINITELY. This second technique is based on the dimension of +play. That has to be understood. If you are inactive, it is good to fall into deep emptiness, +into the inner abyss. But you cannot be empty the whole day and you cannot be passive +the whole day. + + + +You will have to do something. Activity is a basic requirement, otherwise you cannot be +alive. Life means activity. So you can be inactive for a few hours, but for twenty-four +hours you will have to be active. And meditation should be something which becomes +your style of life, it should not be a fragment. Otherwise you will gain it and lose it. If +you are inactive one hour then for twenty-three hours you will be active. The active +forces will be more, and they will destroy whatsoever you attain in your inactivity. The +active forces will destroy it. And the next day you will again do the same: for twenty- +three hours you will accumulate the doer and in one hour you will have to drop it. It will +be difficult. So your mind must change its attitude about work and activity. Hence the +second technique. + +Work should be considered as play, not as work. Work should be considered as play, just +a game. You should not be serious about it; you should be just like children playing. It is +meaningless, nothing is to be achieved; just the very activity is enjoyed. You can feel the +distinction if you play sometimes. When you work it is different: you are serious, +burdened, responsible, worried, anxious, because the result, the end-result, is the motive. +The work itself is not worth enjoying. The real thing is just in the future, in the result. In +play there is no result, really. The very process is blissful. + +And you are not worried, it is not a serious thing. Even if you look serious, it is just +pretending. In play you enjoy the very process; in work the process is not being enjoyed +— the goal, the end, is important. The process has to be tolerated anyhow. It has to be +done because the end has to be achieved. If you could achieve the end without this, you +would drop activity and jump to the end. + +But in play you would not do that. If you could achieve the end without playing, then the +end would be futile. It has meaning only through the process. For example, two football +teams are on the playing-ground. Just by throwing a coin they can decide who will win +and who will be defeated. Why go through so much effort, unnecessarily exerting +yourself? The thing can be decided very easily just by tossing a coin. The end will be +there. One team can win, another can be defeated. Why work for it? But then there will +be no meaning, no significance. The end is not meaningful, the very process is the +meaning. Even if no one wins and no one is defeated the game was worth it. The activity +in itself is enjoyed. + +This dimension of play has to be applied to your whole life: whatsoever you are doing, be +there in that activity so totally that the end is irrelevant. It may come, it has to come, but +it is not on your mind. You are playing, you are enjoying. + +That's what Krishna means when he tells Arjuna to leave the future in the hands of the +Divine. + +The result of your activity is in the hands of the Divine, you simply do. This simply doing +becomes a play. That’s what Arjuna finds difficult to understand, because he says that if it +is just play, then why kill, why fight? He understands what work is but he cannot +understand what play is. And Krishna’s whole life is just a play. You cannot find such a +non-serious man anywhere. His whole life is just a play, a game, a drama. He is enjoying +everything but he is not serious about it. He is enjoying it intensely but he is not worried +about the result. What happens is irrelevant. + +It is difficult for Arjuna to understand Krishna because he calculates, he thinks in tenns +of the end-result. He says in the beginning of the Gita, "This whole thing seems to be +absurd. On both sides my friends and my relatives are standing to fight. Whosoever wins, + + + +it will be a loss, because my family, my relatives, my friends, will be destroyed. Even if I +win, it will not be worth anything because to whom am I going to show my victory? +Victories are meaningful because friends, relatives, family will enjoy them. But there will +be no one, the victory will be just over dead bodies. Who will appreciate it? Who will +say, ' Arjuna, you have done a great deed’? So whether I am victorious or I am defeated, it +seems absurd. The whole thing is nonsense." He wants to renounce. He is deadly serious. +And anyone who calculates will be that deadly serious. + + +The setting of the Gita is unique: war is the most serious affair. You cannot be playful +about it, because lives are involved, millions of lives are involved — you cannot be +playful. And Krishna insists that even there you have to be playful. You don’t think about +what will happen in the end, you just be here and now. You just be a warrior playing. +Don’t get worried about the result because the result is in the hands of the Divine. And it +is not even the point if the result is in the hands of the Divine or not. The point is that it +should not be in your hands. You should not carry it. If you carry it then your life cannot +become meditative. + +This second technique says, GRACIOUS ONE, PLAY. Let your whole life be just a play. +THE UNIVERSE IS AN EMPTY SHELL WHEREIN YOUR MIND FROLICS +INFINITELY. Your mind goes on playing infinitely: the whole thing is just like a dream +in an empty room. While meditating, one has to look at the mind just frolicking, just like +children playing, jumping out of overflowing energy, that’s all. Thoughts jumping, +frolicking, just a play — don’t be serious about them. Even if a bad thought is there, don’t +feel guilty. Or, if there is a very great thought, a very good thought — that you want to +serve humanity and transfonn the whole world; and you want to bring heaven onto earth +�� don’t get too much ego through it, don’t feel that you have become great. + +This is just a frolicking mind. Sometimes it goes down, sometimes it comes up — it is just +overflowing energy, taking many shapes and forms. Mind is just an overflowing spring, +nothing else. + +Be playful, Shiva says, Gracious one, play. The attitude of the player means he is +enjoying the activity, it is good in itself. No profit motive is involved; he is not +calculative. Just look at a businessman. Whatsoever he is doing, he is calculating about +the profit, what he is going to attain out of it. A customer comes. The customer is not a +person, he is just a means. What can be profited out of him? How can he be exploited? +Deep down he is calculating what is to be said, what is to be done. Everything is +calculated just to manipulate, just to exploit. He is not concerned with this person, he is +not concerned with the deal, he is not concerned with anything — he is concerned only +with the future, the profit. + +Look at the Easfiin the villages still, a businessman is not just a profit-maker, and the +customer has not come just to purchase something. They enjoy it. I remember my old +grandfather. He was a cloth merchant and I and my whole family was puzzled because he +enjoyed it so much. For hours together it was a game with the customers. If something +was worth ten rupees, he would ask fifty rupees for it, and he knew this was absurd. And +his customers knew it too, they knew that it must be near about ten rupees, and they will +start from two rupees. + + +Then a long haggling would follow — hours together. My father any my uncles would get + + + +angry. "What is going on? Why don’t you simply say what the price is?" But he had his +own customers. When they came, they would ask, "Where is Dada, where is grandfather? +Because with him it is a game, a play. Whether we lose one rupee or two, whether it is +more or less, that is not the point!" + +They enjoyed it. The very activity in itself was something worth pursuing. Two persons +were communicating through it. Two persons were playing a game and both knew it was +a game — because of course a fixed price was possible. + +In the West now they have fixed prices because people are more calculating and more +profit-motivated. They cannot conceive of wasting time. Why waste time? The thing can +be settled within minutes. There is no need. You can just write the exact price. Why fight +for hours together? But then the game is lost and the whole thing becomes a routine. + +Even machines can do it. The businessman is not needed; the customer is not needed. + +I have heard about a psychoanalyst who was such a busy man and who had so many +patients that it was difficult to have personal contact with everyone. So he would feed his +tape-recorder for a particular patient and the tape-recorder would say whatsoever that +psychoanalyst wanted to say to the patient. + +Once it happened that it was the appointed time of a patient who was a very rich man. + +The psychoanalyst was entering a hotel. Suddenly he saw the patient sitting there. So he +asked, "What are you doing here? It was your time with me." The patient said, "I am so +busy that I have fed my words to my own tape-recorder. Both the tape-recorders are +talking to each other. Whatsoever you have to say to me, my tape-recorder has recorded, +and whatsoever I have to say to you, your tape-recorder has recorded it from my tape- +recorder. This same time, and we are both free." + +If you are too calculating then persons disappear, and more and more mechanization +comes in. Even now in villages in India the haggling goes on. It is a game and worth +enjoying. You are playing. It is a match between two intelligences, and two persons come +in deep contact. But it is not time-saving. Games can never be time-saving. And in games +you don't worry about the time. You are carefree, and whatsoever is going on, you enjoy +it right in that moment. Being playful is one of the deepest bases of all meditative +processes. But we are businesslike; we are trained for it. So even when we meditate, we +are looking for the end, for the result. And whatsoever happens, you will be unsatisfied. +People come to me and they say, "Yes, meditation is growing, progressing. I’m feeling +more happy, a little more silent, at east, but nothing else is happening." What nothing +else? I know that people like this are bound to come some day and say, "Yes, I am feeling +nirvana, but nothing else is happening. I am blissful, but nothing else is happening." + +What nothing else? He is looking for some profit and unless some very visible profit +comes into his hands, something which he can deposit in a bank, he cannot be satisfied. +Silence and happiness are so vague, you cannot possess them, you cannot show them to +anyone. + +Every day it happens that people come to me and they say that they are sad. They are +expecting something which should not be expected even in businesses — and they are +expecting in their meditations. The business mind comes into meditation with the whole +training of business — what profit can be made out of it? + +The businessman is not playful. And if you are not playful, you cannot be meditative. Be +more and more playful. Waste time in play. Just playing with children will do. Even if +there is no one, you can jump and dance alone in the room and be playful. Enjoy. But +your mind will go on insisting, "What are you doing, wasting time? You can earn + + + +something out of this time. You can do something, and you are just jumping, singing, and +dancing. What are you doing? Have you gone mad? Try it. Snatch whatsoever time you +can get out of your business, and be playful. Whatsoever. You can paint, you can play on +a sitar, anything you like — but be playful. Look for no profit out of it, see no future in it, +just the present. And then, then you can be playful inside also. + +Then you can jump on your thoughts, play with them, throw them here and there, dance +with them, but not be serious about them. + +Many people are just unconscious as far as their mind is concerned. Whatsoever happens +in their mind, they are unconscious about it; they are drifting in it without knowing where +the mind leads them. If you can be aware of any track of the mind you will be puzzled at +what is happening. Mind moves through associations. A dog barks on the street. The bark +comes to your head — and now you have started. You may move to the very end of the +world through this barking of the dog. You may remember some friend who had a dog. +Then this dog is dropped and that friend has come into the mind and he had a beautiful +wife and the wife was beautiful... and now you are moving. You can go to the very end of +this world and you will never remember that just a dog played a trick on you; it just +barked, and put you on the track, and you started to move. + +You will feel very awkward at what scientists say about this. They say that this track is +fixed in your mind. If the same dog in the same situation barks again, you will follow this +track again: the friend, the dog, the wife — the beautiful wife — you will go the same way +again. + +Now they have tried many experiments with electrodes in the human brain. They touch a +particular spot in the brain and then a particular memory is released. + +Suddenly you see that you are five years old, playing in a garden, running after a +butterfly. Then the whole sequence is there: you feel pleasant, everything is nice, the air, +the garden, the smell, everything comes alive. It is not simply memory, you relive it. + +Then the electrode is pulled out and the memory stops. If the electrode again touches the +same spot, again the same memory comes again. It is just as if you are remembering +something mechanical. And it always starts from a certain beginning and ends at a +particular end; and then starts from the beginning... just as you record something on a +tape-recorder. Your brain has millions of memories, millions of cells recording, and it is +all mechanical. + +These experiments on the human brain are very strange and very revealing. Memories +can be revived again and again, again and again. One experimenter tried three hundred +times and the memory was the same — it was recorded. The person on whom the +experiment was done became aware and he felt that it was very, very weird because he +was not the master, he could not do anything. When the electrode touched the place, the +memory started and he had to see it. During three hundred times he by and by became a +witness. He started seeing the memory but then he became aware that he was different +and this memory was different. This experiment can be helpful, very helpful, for +meditators, because when you know your mind is nothing but a mechanical recording +around you, you are separate. + + +This mind can be touched. Now scientists say that sooner or later we will cut all the +centers which give you anguish, anxiety, because again and again the same thing is + + + +touched and the whole thing has to be relived. + +I have been trying many experiments with many disciples. Do the same thing and they +move in the same vicious circle, again and again, again and again — unless they become a +witness that this is a mechanical thing. You are aware that if you say the same thing to +your wife each week, the same thing, she will react. After seven days, when she has +forgotten, say the same thing: she will react. Then record — the reaction is going to be the +same. You know, your wife knows, a pattern becomes fixed — and it goes on. Even a dog +can start your pattern just by barking. Something is touched, an electrode has entered. +You have started on a journey. + +If you are playful in life then you can be playful inside with the mind also. Then be as if +you are watching something on a TV screen: you are not involved, you are just a +spectator, an onlooker. Look, and enjoy it. Don’t say good, don’t say bad, don’t condemn, +don’t appreciate, because these are serious things. If a naked woman comes onto your +screen, don't say that this is bad, that some devil is playing a trick on you. No devil is +there to play a trick upon you. Look at it as if it is just on the screen, a film screen. + +And be playful about it: say to the lady, "Wait". Don’t try to push her out because the +more you push her out, the more she will come in — ladies are difficult. And don't follow +her. If you follow then you will be in trouble. Don't follow, don't fight — this is the rule. +Just look and be playful. Just say a "hello" or "good morning". Just look and don't be +disturbed at all. Let the lady wait. She will go by herself, as she came: she moves on her +own. She is not related to you, she is just something in the memory. Struck by some +situation she came there, just a picture. Be playful with it. If you can be playful with your +mind it will drop very soon, because mind can be there only if you are serious. +Seriousness is the link, the bridge. + +GRACIOUS ONE, PLAY. THE UNIVERSE IS AN EMPTY SHELL WHEREIN YOUR +MIND FROLICS INFINITELY. + +The third technique: + +SWEET-HEARTED ONE, MEDITATE ON KNOWING AND NOT-KNOWING, +EXISTING AND NOT-EXISTING. THEN LEAVE BOTH ASIDE THAT YOU MAY +BE. + +... MEDITATE ON KNOWING AND NOT-KNOWING, EXISTING AND NOT- +EXISTING. Meditate on the positive aspect of life and then on the negative — then put +both aside because you are neither. THEN LEAVE BOTH ASIDE THAT YOU MAY +BE. + +Look at it this way. Meditate on a birth: a child is born, you are born. Then you grow, +you become young — meditate on this whole growth. + +Then you become old, then you die. From the very beginning, imagine the very moment +when your father and mother conceived you, and into the womb of the mother you came. +Just the first cell. From there look to the very end, where your body is burning on a +funeral pyre and all your relative are standing around you. Then put both aside — the one +who was bom and the one who has died. Just put both aside and then look within. There +you are — that which is never born and which is never going to die. + +... knowing and not-knowing, existing and not-existing. Then leave both aside that you +may be. You can do it with any positive-negative polarity. You are sitting here. I look at + + + +you. I know you. When I close my eyes, you are no longer there, I don’t know you. Then +put aside both the knowledge that I have known and the knowledge that I don’t know — +you will be empty. Because when you put both knowledge and no-knowledge aside, you +will be empty. + +There are two types of people: some are filled with knowledge and some are filled with +ignorance. There are people who say, "We know." Their ego is bound up with their +knowledge. And there are people who say, "We are ignorant." They are filled with their +ignorance. They say, "We are ignorant. We don't know." One is identified with +knowledge, the other is identified with ignorance, but both possess something, both +cherish something. + +Push both aside, knowing and not-knowing, so that you are neither — neither ignorant nor +knowing. Put aside both positive and negative. Then who are you? Suddenly the who will +be revealed to you. You will become aware of the beyond, that which transcends. Putting +aside both positive and negative, you will be empty. You will be no one, neither wise nor +ignorant. Put both hate and love aside, put both friendship and enmity aside... when both +the polarities are put aside you are empty. + +But this is a trick of the mind: it can put one aside but never the two together. It can put +one aside — you can put ignorance aside, then you cling to knowledge. You can put pain +aside, but then you cling to pleasure. You can put enemies aside, but then you cling to +friends. And there are a few people who do just the verse: they will be put friends aside +and cling to the enemies, they will put love aside and cling to hate, they will put wealth +aside and cling to poverty, and they put knowledge, scriptures, aside and cling to +ignorance. These people are great renouncers. Whatsoever you cling to they put it aside +and cling to the opposite — but they cling all the same + +Clinging is the problem, because if you cling you cannot be empty. Don’t cling — this is +the message of this technique. Just don’t cling to anything positive or negative because +with non-clinging you will find yourself. + +You are there but because of the clinging, you are hidden. With non-clinging you will be +exposed, you will be uncovered. You will explode. + +The fourth technique: + +ENTER SPACE, SUPPORTLESS, ETERNAL, STILL. + +Enter space, supportless, eternal, still. Three qualities of space have been given in this +technique. Supportless: there can be no support in space. Eternal: it can never end. Still: +it will be soundless, it will be silent. Enter this space, it is within you. + +But the mind always asks for support. People come to me and if I say to them, "Just sit +silently, with closed eyes, and don’t do anything," they say, "Give me some +AVALAMBAN, some support. Give me some mantra as a support, because I cannot sit." +Just sitting is difficult. If I give them a mantra, it is okay. They can go on repeating the +mantra. Then it is easy. With support you are never empty, that's why it is easy. +Something must go on, you must be doing something. Doing, the doer remains: doing, +you are filled. You may be filled with Aumkar, Aum, Ram, Jesus, Ave Maria, anything — +you may be filled with anything, but you are filled. Then you are okay Mind resists +emptiness. It wants always to be filled by something else, because if it is filled it can be. +If it is not filled it will disappear. In emptiness you will attain no no-mind. That's why + + + +mind asks for support. + + +If you want to enter inner space, don't ask for support. Drop all supports, mantras, gods, +scriptures, whatsoever gives you a support. If you feel you are supported, drop it, and just +move inside — supportless. It will be fearful; you will feel scared. You are moving to +where you can be lost completely. You may not be able to come back because all +supports will be lost. Y our contact with the bank is lost and where this river will lead +you, no one knows. Your support is lost. You may fall into an infinite abyss. Hence, fear +grips you, and you ask for some support. Even if it is a false support, you enjoy it. Even a +false support is helpful. Because for the mind it makes no difference whether a support is +real or false — it must be a support, that’s the point. You are not alone, something is there +and supporting you. + +It happened once that a man came to me. He was living in a house where he felt there +were spirits and ghosts. And he was very worried. Through worries, he started seeing +more illusions. Through worries, he became ill, weak. His wife said, "If you live any +longer in this house, I am leaving." His children were sent to some relative's house. + +The man came to me and he said, "It has become very difficult now. I see them clearly. +They walk in the night. The whole house is filled with spirits.You help me." So I gave +him one of my pictures and said, "Take it. Now I will tackle those spirits. You simply +sleep silently, you need not worry. Really, I will tackle them, I will see to them. Now it is +my business. And don't interfere. Now you need not be concerned." The man came the +next day. He said, "I slept, it was so beautiful! You have done a miracle!" + +And I had not done anything but give a support. Through support the mind was filled. It +was no longer vacant; someone was there. + +In ordinary life you are leaning on many false supports, but they help. And unless you +become strong enough, you will need them. That’s why I say that this is the ultimate +technique — no support. + +Buddha was dying and Anand asked him, "Now you are leaving us, what shall we do? +How shall we attain? How shall we proceed now? When the master is gone, we will be +wandering in darkness for many, many lives. No one is there to lead us, to guide us, the +light is going out." So Buddha said, "It will be good for you. When I am no more, you +become your own light. Move alone, don't ask for any support, because support is the last +barrier." + +And it happened. Anand had not become enlightened. For forty years he was with +Buddha, he was the closest disciple, he was just like a shadow to Buddha, moving with +him, living with him; he had had the longest contact with him. For forty years Buddha's +compassion was falling over him, raining over him — for forty years. + +But nothing happened, Anand remained as ignorant as ever. And the day after Buddha +died, Anand became enlightened — the next day, the very next day. The very support had +been the barrier. When there was no more Buddha, Anand could not find any support. It +is difficult. If you live with a Buddha, and the Buddha goes, then no one can be a support +to you. Now no one will be worth clinging to. One who has been clinging to a Buddha +cannot cling to anybody else in this world. This whole world will be vacant. Once you +have known a Buddha and his love and compassion, then no love, no compassion can +compare. Once you have tasted that, nothing else is worth tasting. So Anand was alone +for the first time in forty years, totally alone. There was no way to find a support. He had + + + +known the highest support; now lower supports would not do. The next day he became +enlightened. He must have moved into the inner space, supportless, eternal, still. + +So remember, don't try to find any support. Be supportless. If you are trying to do this +technique, then be supportless. That is what Krishnamurti is teaching, "Be supportless. +Don’t cling to a master. Don’t cling to a scripture. Don’t cling to anything." + +That is what every master has been doing. A master's whole effort is first to attract you +towards him, so that you start clinging to him. When you start clinging to him, when you +become close and intimate with him, then he knows that the clinging must be cut. + +And you cannot cling to anyone else now — that is finished. You cannot move to anyone +else — that is impossible. Then he cuts the clinging and suddenly you are left supportless. +It will be miserable in the beginning. You will cry and you will weep and you will +scream and the whole being will feel that you are lost. Into the very deepest depth of +misery you will fall. But from there one arises alone, supportless. + +ENTER SPACE, SUPPORTLESS, ETERNAL, STILL. That space has no beginning, no +end. And that space is absolutely soundless. There is nothing — not even a sound +vibrating, not even a ripple. Everything is still. + +That point is just within you. Any moment you can enter it. If you have the courage to be +supportless, this very moment you can enter it. The door is open. The invitation is for all, +all and everyone. But courage is needed; courage to be alone, courage to be empty, +courage to dissolve and melt, courage to die. And if you can die within to your inner +space, you will attain to the life which never dies, you will attain to AMRIT, to +immortality. + + +THE END. + + + +Chapter 80: All and nothing mean the same + + +The first question: + +Question 1 + +YOU SAID THAT REALLY THERE IS NO ONE INSIDE US, THERE IS ONLY A +VOID, AN EMPTINESS, BUT THEN WHY DO YOU OFTEN CALL IT THE BEING, +THE CENTER? + +Being or non-being, nothing or all — they look contradictory but they both mean the +same. All and nothing mean the same. In dictionaries they are opposites but in life they +are not.Nobody understands. Look at it in this way: if I say that I love all, or if I say that I +love no one, it means the same. If I love someone, then only is there a difference. If I love +all, it means the same as loving no one. There is no difference then. The difference is +always in degrees, relative. And these are both two extremes, they have no degrees: the +total and the zero have no degrees. So you can call the total a zero, or you can call a zero +the total. That's why some enlightened persons have called the inner space emptiness, +SUNYA, the void, nothingness, non-being, ANATMA — and some have called it the +inner being, the absolute being, the BRAHMA, ATMA, the supreme self. These are the +two ways to describe it. One is positive, the other is negative. Either you have to include +all or have to exclude all — you cannot describe it with any term which is relative. An +absolute term is needed. Both the contradictory poles are absolute tenns. + +But there have been some enlightened persons who have remained totally silent. + +They have not called it anything, because whatsoever you call it — whether you call it +being or non-being — the moment you give it a name, a term, a word, you have erred, +because it includes both. + +For example, if you say, "God is alive," or "God is life," it is meaningless, because then +who will be death? He includes all. He must have death in him as completely as life, +otherwise to whom will death belong? And if death belongs to someone else and life +belongs to God — then there are two Gods, and then there will be many problems which +cannot be solved. God must be both life and death. God must be both the creator and the +destroyer. If you say God is the creator, then who is the destroyer? If you say God is +good, then who will be evil? Because of this difficulty, Christians, Zoroastrians, and +many other religions have created a Devil side by side with God, because to whom will +the evil belong? They have created a Devil. But nothing is solved — the problem is only +pushed one step back because then it can be relevantly asked, "Who has created the +Devil?" If God himself creates the Devil, then he is responsible. And if the Devil is +something independent, not related to God, then he himself becomes a God, a supreme +power. And if God has not created the Devil, how can God destroy him? It is impossible. +Theologians go on giving some answers to a question but that answer again creates more +questions. + + +God created Adam, then Adam became evil. He was expelled. He disobeyed God and he +was expelled from the heavenly world. It has been asked again and again, and relevantly, +why did Adam become evil? The possibility must have been created by God in him — the +possibility to be evil, to go wrong, to disobey. If there was no possibility, no inherent + + + +tendency, then how could Adam go wrong? God must have created the tendency. And if +the tendency for evil was there, another thing is also certain: the tendency to overcome it +was not so strong, the tendency to fight it was not so strong. The evil tendency was +stronger. Who created this strength? No one except God can be responsible. Then the +whole thing seems to be a hoax. God creates Adam: he creates an evil tendency in him, a +strong evil tendency which he cannot control; then he goes wrong; then he is punished. +God should be punished, not Adam! Or, you have to accept that some other force exists +side by side with God. And that other force must be stronger than God, because the evil +can tempt Adam and God cannot protect him. The Devil can provoke and seduce and +God cannot protect. The Devil seems to be a stronger God. + +There is a church, recently bom in America, called the church of Satan, the church of the +Devil. They have a high priest, just like the pope of the Vatican. And they say that history +proves that the real God is the Devil. + +And they look logical. They say, "Your God, the God of good, has always been defeated, +and the Devil has always been the victorious. The whole of history proves it. So why +worship a weak God who cannot protect you? It is better to follow a strong God who can +seduce you but who can protect you also — because he is stronger." The church of the +Devil is now a growing church. And they seem logical. This is what history proves. + +This duality — to save God from the negative pole — creates problems. In India we have +not created the other pole. We say God is both: the creator and the destroyer, the good +and the bad. This is difficult to conceive of because the moment we say "God" we cannot +conceive of him being bad. But in India we have tried to penetrate the deepest mystery of +existence — that is, oneness. Somehow, good and bad, life and death, negative and +positive, meet somewhere, and that meeting point is existence, oneness. What will you +call that meeting point? Either you will have to use a positive tenn, or a negative one, +because we don’t have any other terms. If you use positive terms, then you call it "Being" +with a capital B — God, Absolute, BRAHMA. Or if you want to use s negative term, then +you call it nirvana, nothingness, SUNYA, non-being, ANATMA. Both indicate the same. +It is both and your inner being is also both. That is why sometimes I call it being, and +sometimes I call it non-being. + +It is both. It depends on you. If the positive appeals to you, then call it being. If the +negative appeals to you, then call it non-being. It depends on you. Whatsoever feels +good, whatsoever you feel will give you maturity, growth, evolution, call it that. + +There are two types of persons: one who cannot feel any affinity with negativity and the +other who cannot feel any affinity with the positive. Buddha is the negative type. He +cannot feel affinity with the positive, he feels affinity with the negative. He uses all +negative terms. Shankara doesn't feel affinity with the negative. He talks about the +ultimate reality in positive terms. Both say the same thing. Buddha calls it SUNYA, and +Shankara calls it BRAHMA. Buddha calls it the void, nothing, and Shankara calls it the +Absolute, the All. But they are saying exactly the same thing. + +Ramanuja, one of Shankara's greatest critics, says that Shankara is just a hidden +Buddhist. He is not a Hindu, he only appears to be because he uses positive terms. That is +all the difference there is. Wherever Buddha says nothing, he says BRAHMA — all else is +the same. Ramanuja says that Shankara is the great destroyer of Hinduism because he has +brought Buddhism in from the back door by just using a trick — wherever a negative tenn +is used, he uses a positive term, that's all. He calls him a "PRACHANNA-BOUDDHA", a + + + +crypto-Buddhist. + + +And he is right in a way because there is no difference. The message is the same. + +So it depends on you. If you feel an affinity with silence, nothingness, then call that great +being Emptiness. If you don't feel an affinity, if you feel afraid, then call that emptiness +The Great Being. But then your techniques will be different. If you feel scared with +emptiness, aloneness, nothingness, then the four techniques I talked about last night will +not be of much use to you. Forget them. There are other methods about which I have +been talking. Use positive techniques. + +But if you are ready and have the courage to be supportless, to move into emptiness, +alone, ready to cease completely, then these four techniques will help you tremendously. +It depends on you. + +The second question: + +Question 2 + +IF THERE IS ABSOLUTE EMPTINESS INSIDE AN ENLIGHTENED ONE, THEN +HOW IS IT THAT HE SEEMS TO BE MAKING DECISIONS, DISCRIMINATING, +LIKING THIS OR DISLIKING THAT, SAYING YES OR NO? + +This will really look a paradox. If an enlightened one is simply emptiness, then for us it +becomes a paradox. Then why does he say yes or no? Why does ht choose? Why does he +like some things and dislike other things? Why does he talk? Why does he walk? Why +does he live at all? + +For us this is a problem; but for the enlightened one it is not a problem. + +Everything is done out of emptiness. The enlightened one is not choosing. It looks like +choice to us but the enlightened one simply moves in one direction — that direction +conies from the emptiness itself. + +It is just like this. You are walking. Suddenly a car comes in front of you and you feel +that an accident will happen. You don’t decide what to do. Do you decide? How can you +decide? There is no time. A decision will take time. You will have to ponder and think, +weigh up the pros and cons, decide whether to jump this way or that. You don’t decide. +You simply jump. From where does that jump com? Between the jump and you there is +no thinking process. Suddenly you become aware that the car is in front of you and you +jump. The jump happens first. Then later on you can think. In that moment you jump +through hastiness; your whole being jumps without any decision. + +Remember, decision is always of the part, it can never be of the whole. Decision means +that there was a conflict. One part of your being was saying, "Do this," another part was +saying, "Don’t do this." That's why the decision was needed. You had to decide, argue, +and one part had to be pushed aside. That's what decision means. When your totality is +there, there is no need to decide. There is no alternative. An enlightened one is total +within himself, total emptiness. So whatsoever comes out, it comes out of his totality, not +out of any decision. + +If he says "yes" it is not a choice: there was no "no" to be chosen, there was no +alternative. "Yes" is the response of his total being. If he says "no", then "no" is the +response of his total being. That's why an enlightened man can never repent. You will +repent always. Whatsoever you do, it makes no difference — whatsoever you do, you will + + + +repent. If you want to marry a woman, if you decide "yes", you will repent, if you decide +"no", you will repent. Because whatsoever you decide is a partial decision, the other part +is always against. If you decide, "Yes, I will marry this woman," one part of your being is +saying, "Don’t do this, you will repent." You are not total. + +When difficulties arise.... They are bound to arise because when two different persons +start living together, difficulties are bound to arise. There will be conflicts, there will be a +struggle to dominate, there will be power politics. Then the other part will say, "Look! +What did I say? I was insisting that you shouldn’t do this, and you have done it." But that +doesn’t mean that if you had followed the other part, there would have been no +repentance. No! The repentance would have been there, because then you would have +married some other woman, and the conflict and the struggle would have happened. Then +the other part would go on saying, "I was saying marry the first woman. You have missed +an opportunity. + +A heaven is lost, and you are married to a hell." + +You will repent, whatsoever the case, because your decision cannot be total. It is always +against a part, and that part will take revenge. So whatsoever you decide, if you do good +you will repent, if you do bad you will repent. If you do good, then your mind, the other +part, will go on saying that you have missed an opportunity. If you do bad, then you will +feel guilty. An enlightened being never repents. Really he never looks backwards. There +is nothing to look backwards at. Whatsoever is done is done with his totality. + +So the first thing to be understood is that he never chooses. The choice happens to his +emptiness; he never decides. That doesn't mean that he is indecisive. He is absolutely +decisive, but he never decides. Try to understand me. The decision happens in his +emptiness. This is how his whole being acts: there is nothing more to it. If you are +walking and a snake crosses your path, you jump suddenly — that's all. You don’t decide. +You don’t consult a master and a guide. You don't go to look into books in the library +about what to do when a snake crosses the path — how to do it, what the technique is. + +You simply jump. And remember, that jump is coming from your total being, it has not +been a decision. Your total being has acted that way. That is all. There is nothing more to +it. To you it seems as if an enlightened one is choosing, deciding, discriminating, because +you are doing that every moment. + +And you cannot understand something which you have not known at all. An enlightened +one happens to be doing things without any decision, without any effort, without any +choice — he is choiceless. But that doesn’t mean that if you give him food and stones, he +will start eating stones. He will eat the food. To you it will look as if he has decided not +to eat the stones, but he has not decided. That is simply foolish. It doesn’t occur to him. + +He eats the food. This is not a decision — only an idiot person would decide whether to +eat stones or food. Stupid minds decide; enlightened minds simply act. And the more +mediocre the mind, the more effort has to be made for a decision. + +That's what worry means. What is worry? There are two alternatives and no way to +decide between them — and the mind goes on, one moment this side, another moment that +side. This is what worry is. Worry means you have to decide and you are trying to decide, +but you cannot decide. So you are worrying, puzzled, moving in vicious circles. An +enlightened one is never worried. He is total. Try to understand this. He is not divided, he +is not split, there are not two beings in him. But in you there is a crowd: not only two, +there are many, many persons living in you, many voices, just a crowd. An enlightened + + + +one is a deep unity, he is a universe. You are a "multiverse". This word "universe" is +beautiful. + +It means one — "uni". You are a "multiverse", there are many worlds in you. + +The second thing to be understood is that whatsoever you do, before doing it, there is +thinking, thought. Whatsoever an enlightened person is doing, there is no thinking, no +thought. He is doing it. + +Remember, thinking is needed because you have no eyes to see. Thinking is a substitute. +It is just like a blind man groping his way on a path with a stick. A blind man can ask +people who have eyes how they grope, what type of sticks they use to grope their way on +the path. And they will simply laugh; they will say that they don’t need sticks. They have +eyes. They simply see where the door is, they need not grope for it. And they never think +about where the door is. They see and they pass through it. But a blind man cannot +believe that you can simply pass through a door. First you will have to think about where +the door is. First you will have to inquire. If someone is there you will have to ask where +the door is. And even if the direction is given, you will have to grope for it with your +stick — and then too there may be many pitfalls. But when you have eyes, if you want to +go out, you simply look... you don’t think about where the door is, you don't decide. You +simply look, the door is there, you pass through it. You never think that this is a door — +you simply use it and you act. + +The same is the situation with unenlightened minds and enlightened minds. + +An enlightened mind simply looks. Everything is clear. He has a clarity. His whole being +is light. He looks around and he simply moves, acts — he never thi nk s. You have to think +because you don’t have eyes. Only blind men think; they have to think because they don't +have eyes. They need substitute eyes, and thinking provides that. + +I never say that Buddha or Mahavira or Jesus are great thinkers. That would be just +nonsense. They are not thinkers at all. They are knowers, not thinkers. They have eyes, +they can see, and through their seeing they act. Whatsoever comes out of a Buddha +comes out of emptiness, not out of a mind filled with thoughts. It has come out of an +empty sky. It is the response of emptiness. + +But for us it is difficult because nothing comes to us in that way. We have to think about +it. If someone asks a question, you have to think about it. And even then you can never be +certain that whatsoever you are saying is the answer. A Buddha answers; he doesn't think. +You question him, and the emptiness simply responds. That response is not a thought- +over thing. It is a total response. His being behaves that way. That’s why you cannot ask +for consistency from a Buddha. You cannot. Thought can be consistent, a thinker is +bound to be consistent — but an enlightened person cannot be consistent, because each +moment the situation changes. And each moment things come out of his emptiness. + +He cannot force. He cannot think. He does not really remember what he said yesterday. +Every question creates a new answer. And every question creates a new response. It +depends on the questioner. + +Buddha enters a village. One man asks, "Is there God?" Buddha says, "No." In the +afternoon, another man asks, "Is there God?" Buddha says, "Yes." Then in the evening, a +third one asks, "Is there God?" Buddha remains silent. In just one day: in the morning, +no; in the afternoon, yes; in the evening, silence — neither yes nor no. + +Buddha's disciple, Anand, became puzzled. He had heard all three answers. In the night + + + +when everyone had retired, he asked Buddha, "Can I ask you a question? Just in one day +you have answered one question in three ways, not only differently, contradictorily. My +mind is puzzled. I cannot sleep if you don't answer. What do you mean? In the morning +you say yes, in the afternoon no, in the evening you remain silent. And the question was +the same." Buddha said, "But the questioners were different. And how can different +questioners ask the same question?" This is really beautiful, very deep. He said, "How +can different questioners ask the same question? A question comes out of a being, it is a +growth. If the being is different, how can the question be the same? In the morning when +I said yes, the man who was asking was an atheist. He had come to get my confirmation +that there is no God. + +And I could not confirm his atheism, because he was suffering because of it. And because +I could not be a part in his suffering, and I wanted to help him, I said, "Yes, God exists." +That's how I tried to destroy his so-called atheism. In the afternoon, when the other +person was there, he was a theist and he was suffering through his theism. I couldn’t say +yes to him because that would have been a confirmation — which he had come for. Then +he would go and say, 'Yes, whatsoever I was saying is right. Even Buddha says so.’ And +the man was wrong. I could not help a wrong man in his wrongness so I had to say no to +destroy whatsoever he is, to shatter his mind. And the man who came in the evening was +neither. He was a simple, innocent man and he was not asking for any confirmation. He +had no ideology; he was really a religious person. So I had to be silent. I said to him, "Be +silent about this question. Don’t think about it." If I had said yes, it would have been +wrong because he was not there to find a theology. If I had said no, it would have been +wrong, because he was not to be confirmed in any atheism. He was not interested in +thoughts, in ideas, in theories, doctrines, no; he was a real religious man. How can I utter +any word before him? I had to be silent. He understood my silence. When he went away, +his religiousness had deepened." + +Buddha said, "Three persons cannot ask the same question. They can fonnulate it in a +similar way — that is another thing. The questions were all "Does God exist?" Their +formulation was the same, but the being from where the question was coming was totally +different. They meant different things by it; their values were different; their associations +with words were different." + +I remember, once it happened that Mulla Nasruddin came back to his house one evening. +The whole day he had been involved in a football match. He was a fan. IN the evening +when he entered the house, his wife was reading a newspaper, and she said, "Look, +Nasruddin, there is something for you. It is reported here that a man has given his wife in +return for a season ticket for the football matches. You are also a fan, a mad fan, but I +cannot conceive that you would do the same. Or would you? Could you exchange me just +to get a season ticket for the football matches?" + +Nasruddin thought hard, and then he said, "Of course I would not — because it is +ridiculous and criminal. The season is half over." + +Every mind has its own orientation. Y ou may use the same words but because you are +different, those same words cannot be the same. + +Then Buddha said another thing, and that is even more significant. He said, "Anand, why +are you disturbed? You were not a party. You should not listen, because not a single +answer was given to you. You should remain indifferent, otherwise you will go mad. + + +Don’t move with me because I will be involved with many, many types of persons. And if + + + +you listen to everything that is not said to you, you will get confused and crazy. You just +leave me. Otherwise remember to listen only when I speak to you; at other times don’t +listen. Whatsoever I say is not your business. It was not said to you and it was not your +question at all. So why should you be worried? You were not related. Someone asked, +someone else replied. Why are you unnecessarily worried about it? If you have the same +question, ask, and then I will answer. But remember, my answers are not to the questions, +but to the questioners. I respond. I look at the man, I see through the man, the man +becomes transparent — and this is my response. The question is irrelevant; the questioner +is relevant." + +You cannot ask for consistency from an enlightened person. Only unenlightened, +ignorant persons can be consistent, because they don't have to look. They just follow +some ideas. They carry dead ideas, consistently. For their whole life they will carry +something and they will remain consistent to it. They are stupid, that's why they can +remain consistent. They are not alive. They are dead. Aliveness cannot be consistent. + +That doesn’t mean that it is wrong — aliveness is consistent, but very deeply, not on the +surface. Buddha is consistent in all the three answers, but his consistency is not in the +answers — his consistency is in his effort to help. + +He wanted to help the first man. He wanted to help the second man. He wanted to help +the third man. For all three, compassion was there, love was there. He wanted to help +them — that is his consistency. But it is a deep current. His words are different, his +answers are different, but his compassion is the same. + +So when an enlightened person speaks, answers, that answer is a total response of his +emptiness, of his being. He echoes you, he reflected you, he is a mirror. He has no face of +his own. Your face is mirrored in his heart. So if an idiot comes to meet a Buddha, he +will meet an idiot — Buddha is just a mirror. And that man will go and spread the rumor +that Buddha is an idiot. He has seen himself in Buddha. If someone sensitive, +understanding, mature, grown up comes, he will see something else in Buddha: he will +see his own face. There is no other way — you go on seeing mirrors in persons who are +totally empty. Then whatsoever you carry is your interpretation. + +It is said in old scriptures that when you reach an enlightened person, remain totally +silent. Don’t think, otherwise you will miss the opportunity of meeting him. Just remain +silent. Don’t think. Absorb him, but don’t try to understand him through your head. + +Absorb him, drink him, allow your total being to be open to him, let him move within +you, but don’t think about him — because if you think, then your mind will be echoed. + +Let your total being be bathed in his presence. Only then will you have a glimpse of what +type of being, of what type of phenomenon you have come in contact with. Many came to +Buddha. They came and went. They carried their own opinions, and they went out and +they spread them. Very few, really very few, understood — and that is how it should be, +because you can understand only according to you. If you are ready to melt and change +and be transformed, only then can you understand what an enlightened person, what an +enlightened being is. + +The third question: + +Question 3 + +YOU SAID THAT NOISE AND DISTURBANCES ARE NOT OUTSIDE IN THE +WORLD, BUT ARE BECAUSE OF YOUR OWN MINDS AND EGO. BUT WHY DO + + + +THE SAINTS AND MYSTICS ALWAYS LIVE IN UNNOISY, UNCROWDED +PLACES? + + +Because they are still not saints and mystics. They are still endeavoring, still working. +They are seekers, not SIDDHAS. They have not reached. Noise will disturb them, the +crowd will disturb them. The crowd will pull them back to its own level. They are still +weak, they need protection. They are still not confident. They cannot move into +temptation. They have to protect themselves in the lonely solitude where they can grow +and become strong. When they are strong there will be no problem. Mahavir moved into +the wilderness. For twelve years he was alone, silent, not talking, not moving in villages +or cities. + +Then he became enlightened. Then he came back to the world. Buddha was in total +silence for six years. Then he came back to the world. Jesus or Mohammed, or anyone — +when they are growing they need protected conditions. When they have grown, then there +is no problem. + +So if you find a mystic afraid of moving in a crowd, then know well that he is still a +child, growing. Otherwise why should a mystic be afraid of moving in crowds? Nothing +can be done to him by the crowd, by the noise, by the world, by the objects of the world. +With all this madness around him, nothing can be done to him. He cannot be touched. He +can move and he can live — anywhere it happens for his emptiness to live, he can live. + +But in the beginning it is good to be alone, to be in a hannonious, natural surrounding. So +remember, don't think that because you live in a noisy Bombay you are a mystic, or you +have grown up and have become a SIDDHA. If you want to grow you will also have to +move sometimes, for some definite periods, into loneliness — out of the crowd, out of the +concerns of the world, relations of the world, objects of the world — into such a place +where you can be alone and not disturbed by others. As you are now you can be +disturbed, but once you have the strength, once you have the inner power, once you are +crystallized and you know that now no one can shatter your inner center, you can move +anywhere. + +Then the whole world is lonely. Then wherever you are is wilderness. Then the space of +silence moves with you because you are the creator of it. Then around you, you create +your own inner silence, and wherever you move, you are in silence. No one can penetrate +that silence. No noise can disturb it. + +But unless the crystallization has happened, don’t believe that you will not be disturbed. +You are disturbed, whether you know it or don’t know it. Really, you are so disturbed that +you cannot know it. You have become accustomed to disturbance. Every nerve is on +edge; you are continuously disturbed. Right now you don’t feel the disturbance — to feel +the disturbance sometimes you need to be not disturbed. Only then can you feel it in +contrast. You are continuously disturbed but you have become accustomed to it, +habituated to it. You think this is how life is. It would be good if you move into the +Himalayas for some time. It would be good to go into some remove village, a remote +forest, and be alone for a few days' silence — as if the whole of humanity has disappeared. +Then come back to Bombay. Then you will know what disturbance you have been living +in. You will be suddenly disturbed. Now you have a contrast. You had an inner music, +now it is shattered. For seekers solitariness is good; for SIDDHAS it is irrelevant. + +And there are two types of wrong people. With the first type, if you say to them that it is + + + +they who are disturbed, the situation is irrelevant, then they will never go into solitariness +to have a glimpse of what silence is. + +Then they will remain here and they will say, "Nothing disturbs us. It is us really, not the +surrounding. So we remain here." And they are disturbed but their theory will become a +rationalization. Then there are other people, the other type of wrong people, who, if you +tell them to move into silence, to solitude, because it will help, they will move — but then +they will never come back. Then it becomes an addiction and they will remain weak +forever, they will always feel afraid of coming back to the world. Then their solitariness +has not been a help; rather, it has become a hindrance. They are not stronger through it, +they have become weaker. Now they cannot move in the world. Both these types are +wrong. + +Be the third type, which is the right type. In the beginning, know well that you are +disturbed by circumstances; so sometimes try, manage, to move out of them. Then when +you are out of them, whatsoever silence you attain, bring it back to your circumstances +and try to preserve it. If you can preserve it in the circumstances, then only will the +theory have become an experience. Then you know that nothing disturbs. Then you know +it is you ultimately who are disturbed or not disturbed. But make it an experience — just +as a theory it is useless. + +The fourth question: + +Question 4 + +IT IS ONE THING TO REALIZE COSMIC CONSCIOUSNESS ON EARTH, AND +TRANSCEND BODY. + +BUT HOW DO REALIZED ONES KNOW FOR SURE THAT THIS +CONSCIOUSNESS IS ETERNAL AND WILL REMAIN AFTER THE DEATH OF +THE BODY? + +The first thing is they don't bother about it. They are not worried about whether it will +remain or not. It is you who are worried. They don't think of the next moment. The next +life is just irrelevant; even the next day, the next moment, is not a point of concern. It is +you who always ask about something in the future, something of the future. Why? +Because your present is just empty, your present is just nothing, your present is just +rotten, your present is such a suffering that you can tolerate it only if you go on thinking +of the future and the paradise and the life ahead. Just here now there is no life so you +pitch your mind into the future just to escape from the present, the ugly present. One who +is realized is here and now, totally alive. All that can happen has happened. There is no +future to it. Whether death is going to kill him or not is not a concern at all. It is the same. +Whether he disappears or remains, it makes no difference. This moment is so rich, so +absolutely rich, this moment is so intense, that his whole being is here and now. + +Anand asked Buddha again and again, "What will happen to you when your body dies?" +And Buddha insisted again and again, "Anand, why are you so concerned about the +future? Why don’t you look at me, at what is happening now?" But again, after a few +days, he will ask, "What happens to an enlightened one when his body dies?" He is afraid +about himself. + + +He is afraid. He knows that when the body dies there is no possibility of reviving it, there + + + +is no possibility of remaining, there is no possibility of being. And he has not attained +anything. The light will just go out — it has been a futile thing. If that happens without his +attaining anything, he will simply disappear. So the whole thing was meaningless, the +whole suffering was meaningless, leading nowhere. He was concerned; he wanted to +know if something survives after the body. But Buddha says, "I am here and now. What +will happen in the future is not a concern at all." + +So the first thing is that a realized one is not bothered. That is one of the signs of a +realized one — he is not bothered by the future. + +And the second thing — you asked, how does he know for sure? Knowledge is always +sure. Certainty is inherent, intrinsic, to knowledge. You have a headache. Can I ask you, +"How can you say for sure that you have a headache?" You will say, "I know." I can ask, +"But how are you sure that your knowledge is right and not wrong?" But no one asks +such nonsensical questions. When the headache is there, it is there — you know it. +Knowledge is intrinsically certain. When one is enlightened, he knows he is enlightened; +he kn ows that he is not this body; he knows that inside he is just a vast space. And space +cannot die. Things can die, space cannot die. + +Just think about this room. + +We can destroy this building, this "Woodlands", but we cannot destroy the roominess in +this room. Can you destroy it? The walls can be destroyed, but we are sitting here in this +roominess, space. The walls can be destroyed, but how can you destroy this room — not +the walls, the space here? The whole of "Woodlands" may disappear — it will disappear +one day — but this space will remain. Your body will disappear and because you don’t +know the inner space, you are afraid. You want to know it for sure. But an enlightened +man knows that he is the space — not the body, not the walls, but the inner space. The +walls will drop, they have dropped many times, but the inner space will remain. It is +something he has to find proofs for, it is his immediate knowledge. He knows it, that's all. +Knowledge is intrinsically certain. + +If your knowledge is uncertain, then remember it is not knowledge. People come to me +and they say, "Our meditation is going very well. We are feeling very happy." And then +suddenly they ask me, "What do you say about it? Is our happiness really there? Are we +really happy?" They ask me! They are not certain about their happiness. What type of +knowledge is this? They are simply pretending. But they cannot deceive themselves. + +They are thinking, they are hoping, they are wishing — but they are not happy. Otherwise +what is the need to ask me? I will never go to ask anybody whether I am happy or not. + +Why should I? If I am happy, I am happy. If I am not, I am not. Who else can give proof +of it? If I cannot be a witness, who will be a witness for me, and how can the other be a +witness? So sometimes I play games. Sometimes I say, "Yes, you are happy. You are +absolutely happy." And they become more happy just by hearing me. And sometimes I +say, "No, you don’t show anything. There is no indication. You are not happy. You must +have been dreaming." And they drop, their happiness disappears, they become sad. What +type of happiness is this? Just by saying that you are happy it increases; and just by +saying that you are not, it disappears! They are just trying to be happy but they are not. +This is not knowledge, this is just wish-fulfillment. They hope, and they think they can +deceive themselves. By thinking that they are happy, believing that they are happy, +finding some proof, finding some certificate from somewhere that they are happy, they +think that they will create happiness. It is not so easy. When something happens in the + + + +inner world, you know it has happened. You don’t need any certificate, you don't need +one! The very search for someone to approve is childish. It shows that you long for +happiness, but you have not attained it. You don't know it. It has not happened to you. +One who has realized is always certain, and when I say certain, sure, absolutely sure, I +don’t mean that he feels some uncertainty somewhere, and against that uncertainty he +feels certain — no. + +He is simply certain. There is no question of uncertainty. I am alive. Am I certain about +it, sure about it? There is no question. There is no question of certainty. It is absolutely +certain. It does not have to be decided. I am alive. + +Socrates was dying and someone asked him, "Socrates, you are dying so easily, so +happily. What is the matter? Are you not afraid? Are you not scared?" Socrates said a +very beautiful thing. He said, "Only two things are possible after I am dead: either I will +be or I will not be. If I am not, then there is no question. No one is there to kn ow it, to +know that 'I am not’. The whole thing simply disappears. And if I am there, then there is +no question — 'I am’. Only two are the possibilities: either I will be, or I will not be, and +both are okay. If I am, then the whole thing continues. If I am not, then there is no one to +know, so why be worried?" + +He is not an enlightened one, but he is a very wise man. Remember, this is the difference +between a wise one and an enlightened one. A wise one thi nk s deeply, penetrates +intellectually into everything, and comes to a conclusion. He is a very wise man. He says +that there are two alternatives. Logically he penetrates into the phenomenon of death: +"only two are the possibilities: either I simply disappear, I am no more; or I will remain." +Is there any third alternative? There is no third alternative. + +So Socrates says, "I have thought about both. If I remain, then there is no question to be +worried about. If I am no more, there is no one to worry. So why be worried now? I will +see what happens." He is not in the know, he doesn't know what is going to happen, but +he has thought about it wisely. He is not a Buddha, he is the keenest intellectual possible. +But if you can become wise — not enlightened, because enlightenment is neither wisdom +nor ignorance, the duality has been transcended — even if you can become wise, you will +feel relaxed; even if you can become wise, you can feel very contented. + +But wisdom is not the goal of Tantra or yoga. Tantra and yoga aim for the superhuman, +the point where wisdom and ignorance are both transcended: where one simply knows +and does not think, where one simply looks and is aware. + +The last question: + +Question 5 + +I CERTAINLY WANT TO BECOME ENLIGHTENED. BUT IF I DO, WHAT +DIFFERENCE DOES IT MAKE FOR THE REST OF THE WORLD? + +But why are you worried about the rest of the world? Let the world worry about itself. +And you are not worried about what will happen to the rest of the world if you remain +ignorant.... + +If you are ignorant, what happens to the rest of the world? You create misery. Not that +you knowingly do it, you are misery — so whatsoever you do, you sow seeds of misery all +around. + + + +Your hopes are meaningless; your being is significant. You may think you are helping +others — you hinder them. You may think you love others — you may be simply killing +them and murdering them. You may think you are teaching others, but you may be +simply helping them to remain ignorant forever — because what you hope, what you +think, what you wish, is not significant. What you are is significant. + +Every day I see people around who are loving to each other — but they are killing each +other. They think they are loving, and they think they are living for the other, and without +them the life of their family, their beloveds, their children, their wives, their husbands, +will be miserable — but it is miserable with them. And they try in every way but +whatsoever they do, it goes wrong. It is bound to be so, because they are wrong. Doing is +not of much importance, the being from where it comes, originates, is. If you are +ignorant, you are helping the world to become a hell. It is already. This is what has +happened through you. Wherever you touch, you will create hell. + +If you become enlightened, whatsoever you do — or you need not do anything — just your +being, your presence will help others to flower, to be happy, to be blissful. + +But that should not be your concern. The first thing is how to be enlightened. You ask +me, "I want to be enlightened." But that wanting seems to be very impotent because +immediately you say "but". + +Whenever "but" comes in, it shows the desire is impotent. "But what will happen to the +world?" Who are you? What do you think about yourself? Does the world depend on +you? Are you running it? Managing it? Are you responsible? Why give so much +importance to yourself? Why feel so important? + +This feeling is part of the ego and this worrying about others will never allow you to +move to a peak of realization, because that peak is achieved only when you drop all +worries. And you are so efficient in accumulating worries that you are simply wonderful. +Not only your own, you go on accumulating others' worries — as if yours are not enough. +You go on thinking about others, and what can you do? You can only get more and more +worried and mad. + +I was reading a viceroy's journal. Lord Wavell's journal. The man seems to be very +sincere, deeply honest, because some remarks he makes are just superb. One remark he +makes in a journal is, "Unless these three old men, Gandhi, Jinnah, and Churchill, die, +India will be in trouble." These three men, Gandhi, Jinnah, Churchill — and these three +were helping in every way! Churchill's own viceroy writes in a journal that these three +men should die soon. And he hopefully even gives their ages: Gandhi, 75, Jinnah, 65, +Churchill, 68. Because these three are the problems. Can you think of Gandhi imagining +that he is the problem — or Jinnah, or Churchill? All are doing their best to solve the +problem of this country! And Wavell said that these three are the problem, because all the +three are adamant, stubborn; every one of these three has the absolute truth and the other +two are absolutely wrong. + +These three absolutes cannot meet anywhere — the other two are simply wrong. There is +no question about it. + +Everyone thinks as if he is the center and he has to worry about the whole world, and +change the whole world, transform the whole world, create a utopia. All that you can do +is just change yourself. You cannot change the world. You can create more mischief +trying to change it; you can create more chaos; you can harm; and you can puzzle. +Already the world is too puzzled. You can puzzle it more and confuse it more. + + + +Please leave the world to itself. You can do only one thing, and that is, you can achieve +inner silence, inner bliss, inner light. If you achieve this, you have helped the world very +much. Just by changing one ignorant spot into an enlightened flame, just by changing one +person from darkness into light, you have changed apart of the world. And this changed +part will have its own chain reactions. Buddha is not dead. Jesus is not dead. They cannot +be dead because there is a chain reaction — from one lamp, from one flame, another flame +takes over. And a successor is created, and they go on living. + +But if your light is not there, if your lamp is without a flame, you cannot help anyone. + +The first basic thing is that you must attain your inner flame. Then others can share. Then +you can kindle others' light also. Then it becomes a succession. + +Then you may disappear from the body but your flame goes on passing from hand to +hand. Up to eternity it goes on and on. Buddhas never die, enlightened persons never die, +because their light becomes a chain reaction. And unenlightened persons never live, +because they cannot create any chain, they don't have any light to share, no flame to +kindle someone else's flame. + +Please be concerned with yourself only. Be selfish, I say, because that is the only way +you will become selfless, that is the only way you can become a help and a blessing to +the world. Don’t be worried about it; that is not your concern. The greater your worries +are, the greater you think your responsibilities are. And the greater your responsibilities, +the more you feel yourself as being great. You are not. You are simply mad. Get out of +this madness of helping others. Just help yourself. That’s all that can be done. + +And then many things happen... but they happen as a consequence. Once you become a +source of light, things start happening. Many will share it, man will be enlightened +through it, many will attain life, more life, abundant life through it. But don’t think about +it. You cannot do anything about it consciously. Only one thing can be done and that is: +you can become conscious. Then everything follows. + +THE END. + + +