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jquiros

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suicide

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hey liam, is you are have beans? ?????? nevermind, it's too late now.

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what ways is there to help and support other teenagers and young adults? what ways can u come up with to help young adult and teenagers ? I'm trying to get ideas for a project of mine. 15 male

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Never EndingI’ve been going through shit this past year. My mental health has plummeted these past months and I’ve been fantasizing about self-harming all year. My oldest sister has been going at it with my mother and they sometimes get into heated arguments. My sister referenced her wanting to end it all after a fight with her boyfriend but the only thing my mother & father said was that people go to Hell if they do that. That’s the only thing that matters to them. For me, the road to Heaven is already ruined because of my sexuality. If I’m going there anyway, what’s the point of waiting? This isn’t the first time she referenced this before. My mother has seen me look depressed and thought it would be best to tell me that if I commit suicide, I will burn it Hell. I was to self-destruct. I see why people take drugs. I need to feel. Dreaming about slitting my wrists only soothes me for so long. I can’t wait to get away. 21 years of living and no one has ever loved me. I’m a worthless closeted homo and I feel that world is laughing at me. I will finally get the last laugh once I hang myself. Didn’t want to ruin Christmas but now since Christmas is over, I have nothing holding me back. My depression has turn into anger. Most days, I feel rage and isolation. Nothing really brings me joy in this life.

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I can’t upload an image so I can’t explain how much I hate YouTube’s new like, dislike and reply symbols on the comments with a meme so I’ll use a rant. Seriously, the old ones were incredibly iconic and pleasing to look at, as well as the nice blue differing much from the white and the black so you could easily see which comments you’ve liked (and disliked but nobody does that). But now they look super sharp and cramped and generally unpleasant for the eyes. As well as that, they also turn white, black if you use light mode,I’m guessing. You now have to look at them for a second to see if you’ve already liked or disliked the comment. How does nobody else know about this?!

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Despite what we will tell you Californians do have an accent Mine is basically standard American, but that’s cuz I was basically forced into a standard American accent cuz my family would correct me if I spoke in anything but that, so my accent is distinct from most people around me, although that’s relatively common, but most peoples accent where I live sounds like if a NorCal accent had a slight southern drawl and had the speed and stressing of a valley gurl accent, it’s bazaar and so easy to understand, although the people that stray more towards the valley gurl side are a bit harder to understand I do still have a central California accent but it’s not nearly as thick as most people’s, they didn’t completely beat (not literally) it out of me

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I found the location.Next step is to get the rope, and hold off till the date comes

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All I wanted was to help. its not fair and god does not existsomeone kill me right now. please. just do. or get me financial help to where I can just leave. I cannot be here right now. I want to kill myself. but I don't want to cause further damage to anyone else. someone please kill me or help me, honestly the only thing that can help right now is money and I cant just go around begging. but I need to die. I have to. just kill me now please. I don't know if I'm a good person or not, but I damn well tried to be. there is no god. I went to hell, and I came back, I'm not sure what happens after you die. but I don't care at this point. I just want the suffering to end.... the only thing that can help me right now is money(just to get away so I can live a normal life) or death..... idk what else to say

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my chimney is on fire help Idk what to do

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My gf broke up with me She said that she just doesn't feel the same way she use to and that we should just be friends. Lovey duck if ur reading this, u were my first love and gave me the best year of my life and while I wish to give it another try one day but for now I can only respect ur wishes and stay friends. Thank u to whoever stoped by to read this

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I feel like my girlfriend is pulling me downHi, I’ve been a long time lurker and finally convinced myself to post something too. So, for start, I’m a 17 year old boy from Chech Republic. I’ve been struggling with depression and anxiety for about 3 years now, but I’ve never hurt myself. But since 6 months ago, when I met my new girlfriend, I feel like I’m too obsessed with her to the point where I started choking or even cutting myself when I felt like she was mad at me. I have pretty fragile psyche so this shit can really put me on my knees. It happens daily. It got to the point where she almost broke up with me. But I knew that if she would leave me, I would have no other purpose in life. I don’t know if I’m just too optimistic, but the only future I can see is with her. I have no friends, my family treats my like shit but she doesn’t. It’s just my mind putting me in a state where I think she treats me like shit because I deserve it so I deserve to suffer. Is this a healthy relationship? I know that if we ever break up I’m going to kill myself, but I want to change, I want to be the best she can ever have, but I don’t know why.

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First one to beat me in Connect Four wins an useless award ⚪⚪⚪⚪⚪⚪⚪ ⚪⚪⚪⚪⚪⚪⚪ ⚪⚪⚪⚪⚪⚪⚪ ⚪⚪⚪⚪⚪⚪⚪ ⚪⚪⚪⚪⚪⚪⚪ ⚪⚪⚪🔴⚪⚪⚪ Press space four times at the start of each line for good formatting. Copy paste my move each time and then make yours. I'll reply to your comment and we will start playing.

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lol guys guess what im pregnant i hope it's a boy im so excited but im also kinda scared cus my mom said that vaccines cause SIDS but i dont want the baby to get polio if i dont vaccinate it???

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How's everyone's day going? I just wanted to check and see how everyone is doing.

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how to silence the thoughts?pretty consistently i find myself hardly hearing or listening to people. i find myself wanting to die almost all the time, or like warn people that i am involuntarily awful, that everyone leaves eventually. i find myself narrating my thoughts and life while others are talking. i dont know, maybe i am alone in this, but if im not... how the fuck do i remain present anymore? all i can think about are the negatives. i practice DBT but it doesnt help.

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Leave a message for me to wake up to. It can be basically anything. I'm bored. Damn I really should sleep

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Rose's are red, the sun is shining, my mental health is mental decliningI'm making dark jokes to compensate for my never ending loop of depression which eventually convince me to kill myself hopefully ill see you tommorow. ;-;

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wtf is the point of astrology like, wtf is the point? Oh wow I'm a picses, guess I'll go make a living out of this Seriously, stupid man ​ Like, oh hey there astrology obsesed person, what's your zodiac sign? Oh, it's a cancer I know you are, but what's your zodican sign?

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No one's really sure how we got to Tennessee from Massachusetts in the summer of 2017, But we do know because of a framed receipt Maddox's mom Has hanging in the guest bathroom of her basement That we somehow ended up stopping at a Jimmy John's in Cincinnati at 11:23 p.m. The previous Sunday. No one really remembers anything from those few days outside of the receipt that parking ticket and waking up in the dumpster behind a bowling alley owned by a gentleman who looks likes Santa Claus' Ecstasy addicted 2nd cousin. But he was a nice dude didn't call the cops and even gave us directions to the closest motel that didn't have bed bugs. The phone call back home was less than pleasant... The parents still sent us gas money to get back to New England and we'll it was one last lost summer weekend before we all left for college... so yeah

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My sister's friend has passed My sister's friend has recently passed away from suicide. He was being bullied and couldn't take it anymore. All I ask from you guys is that you send words of encouragement to u/hardboiledeggsowo thank you and if you or a friend are suicidal please tell someone you trust

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I Need Some Advice So I'm sure this has been done before but I wanted to make a post about it for myself. I like this girl in my class and I want to ask her out but we're not really close and we've never really hung out on a personal level. I don't think that she likes me or knows that I like her but I may be wrong. I'm lacking in the self-confidence department and I'm not amazing at social interaction unless it's with the boys. I was wondering if anyone else has been in this situation and wanted to know what they did about it.

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Here's my list of hobbies * Switching between phone and pc. * Using the same 3 apps/webpages * listening to the same song over and over * putting myself in imaginary scenarios that will never happen * having a "hi" exchange for weeks in a row * getting more and more sad everyday * getting more anxious every day * wanting to play with my dogs but i can't since there's a malaria outbreak in my city * worrying about my mental health * worrying about my sexuality * asking if my friends actually are my friends. * etc and etc ​ ^(help)

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Would be fun to make a group chats with random people Post is in the title

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I’m bored, anyone wanna chat for a bit? 19M, I’m super bored doing homework. If you wanna talk then DM me

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My dad downloaded this QUSTODIO crap on my pc. How do i get rid of it or disable it without him knowing? My dad downloaded this QUSTODIO crap on my pc. How do i get rid of it or disable it without him knowing? Title says it. I need to disable this crap and get control over my pc again.

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i have the horni disease and the only cure is u ahaha hmu bb lmao jkjkjk...........unless 😳😳😳 ahaha dms are open

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I'm thinking about doing drugs. Just some addy, maybe smoke a little weed. I don't know where to cop though.

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I take the train to work everyday, I usually always contemplate just jumping in front of it. I’ll probably never do it, but it calms me knowing I can.Depression is crushing my soul today. Holding back the tears is extra hard this morning. if there truly is a God, I’ll never understand why this God of ours created millions and millions with mental illness. pretty fucked up if you ask me. Man I wanna ball my eyes out.

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First times thinking about suicide recentlyBeen on antidepressants for half a year now - things have only gotten worse since taking them. Recently started thinking about what the repercussions of suicide would be, and what would happen after i die. How would I do it? What’s the quickest, most efficient way that’s least painful? I don’t even wanna act like I’ve got some huge sob story and my life has been doomed from the start. I’m just sick of hating myself and wanting to be somebody else. I’m tired of waking up and wanting to go back to sleep, even though I’m not tired. I wanna just sit in a metal box and stare at a wall for a long while. I wanna just stop existing for a little while. I’m so burnt out. Not even from school. I’m burnt out from life. The nice thing about it all, though, is that I kinda like the power of not caring anymore. I’m about to graduate high school and go to my dream college, and all I can help but think about is how much I don’t care about my future anymore. I don’t care about the consequences of my life anymore. It’s nice to not care about all the little things that used to make me hate myself. Now when I screw things up, instead of feeling like crap, and just think about how it won’t matter in the long run since there won’t be a long run. A part of me hopes things get worse so I can just off myself and not have to care anymore, so my fuck-ups stop having power over my mentally ill brain.

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The Dispair Islands and its residents The Void Islands are a group of Islands located on the surface of an almost dead dimension. The Islands are likely alive and they demonstrate their lives by changing position and shape every 279 years. The Island is inhabited by a tribe of natives called "the Wave Missionaries. In 1478 DC another group of humans came to the islands and pillaged most of them, in 1480 began a war between the Wave Missionaries and the aggressors. The Missionaries were led by Hato, the best swordsman in all the Islands, who was gifted by the Wave a set of divine powers. The aggressors came from a never specified location and were led by Irwin Wardlock. The war ended in 1487 after the fall of Fort Hijo. After that Hato decided to pass down his powers to his family. In 1501 he mysteriously disappeared leaving a note saying "I'll return, I just listened to the Wave calling me, it was not a pleasant invitation. It was a scream of pain". 371 years later a city is founded after the alliance of the Missionaries and another batch of humans called Londinium. 28 years later a relative of Hato, Grica Wallace Irwin, sets out to find the truth behind the shady actions of duke Abraham Lucas and the fate of his long lost ancestor , Hato

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My suicidal thoughts.I am typically a person who tends to internalize a lot of my problems and do not usually express when I am feeling depressed or sad. However I do want to express these problems and talk about them. I know I need help with this because I have obsessed over these thoughts for years now. I am constantly of the mind set to judge if life is worth it or not, wondering how much more of existing can I stand before I just put a bullet in my head. I feel like the mindset I hold is undeserved and pathetic. Some people undergo such profound suffering for these thoughts to manifest and it's almost no wonder they do. But I have not suffered any great tragedy my life is easy, so easy compared to most people's it's pathetic. I wake up do household chores for an hour or so and play video games with my friends all day. The only great stress I have is how I will manage to grow up. Because it seems I have the lifestyle of a child when I am at my transition into adulthood. But this is also paired with the realization that the life of the average joe that lives in a part of the world with the highest life quality is doomed to the majority of their life being tedium and suffering. And that is not me just speculating I have had jobs in retail and a fast food restaurant. So I have experienced working in lowly entry level jobs and going to school and both suck the majority of the time. So I am stuck left wondering what the fuck do I do that isn't awful? I fear my life is going to turn into a game where I pick jobs hoping one of them will be good only to realize they have all sucked and then uh oh I'm real old and the majority of things I have done in life I have regretted well fuck me I guess I'll die. I just feel so lost, I am trying to find a path in life where I am not doomed to suffer the majority of the time and live for those small bits of time where I can do what I please. I want to live for what I like all the time but I'm afraid that's too greedy, too much to ask for, the majority of people don't how could I go beyond to that state of blissful existence? Does it even exist? Am I chasing after something that can never be attained? And if that's the case how do I endure the suffering? Because I feel like I am weaker than the majority I am pathetic when compared to the majority. People have endured so much more than I have yet they still have the will to move forward when I am here wallowing in despair over the inevitable suffering I will face in the future. One day I fear when I finally face my moment of profound suffering it will give me the willpower to end my life. If you have anything to say please do I really want to hear your opinion on my circumstances. I have kept these thoughts to myself for too long.

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Need help remembering a name of an old toy I remember when I was younger, back in 2010-12, I remember the kids around me used to have plastic balls, with a magnet on the bottom, and when stuck onto metal, would explode into a creature, and then was folded away by hand I remembered them a couple days ago, but for the life of me remember what they were called, I don't think I ever knew lol If someone would b able to tell me what they're called, I'll be indebted 2u Tyia

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How do you delete a reddit account Yeah reddit is kinda boring and I don’t know how to delete my account

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Making a post till I get a gf #1 Ok now before you say I'm trynna copy u/Rubeva here me out. Yes I'm copying him for he has given me this terrible idea. However I'll not be posting any jokes cos I'm not funny . Just gonna post random shit.

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So i just found out most of the people I know hate me I was on a call with one of my friends and he said “you know, everyone hates you.”I was confused. Then he said “yeah. A lot of people think you’re really annoying.” I asked him for names. He gave me the names of my crush, Sophia, one of my closest friends, Noah, and another friend. Ian. I don’t know what to do.

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I need advice on clothes and fashion I barely have any clothes, and want to buy some. I don't know almost anything about brands and fashion, and i also don't know what suits me, i have a pic of me on my profile, so you can suggest what would suit me well. Also, try to keep it simple and fairly cheap. Also, i need recommendations on where to buy clothes. Thanks in advance, ig.

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If you like reading manga, I started a Manga/Lightnovel reading club on Discord. Would anyone like to join? Hi, I had an idea to start a server for teens like me who enjoy reading manga or lightnovels. My idea is, we vote on manga to read, and we read and discuss the series together. I also have various discussion channels ranging from manga, light novels, manwhas, gaming, anime, etc. If you would like to join or want to know more details, just shoot me a message. (Only teenagers)

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Boobs are like, not that important Like yea if they exist that's dope and all but size doesn't even matter like a boob's a boob you know

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i wish i wasn’t to lazy for suicide.i can’t handle this life anymore and i want it to end. but that requires the energy i don’t have.. i don’t care.. if laziness could kill me i’d be happy. anyways, i have nothing else to say.

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Any Arab teens? Arab brethren DM I want to talk to a fellow Arab 😳

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There's nothing life can offer me would make living worth it.I'm 22 years old, diagnosed with borderline personality disorder. I tried to kill myself by overdose last Christmas but landed in the psych ward instead. I self-harm fairly often. Sometimes that has kept me from trying to kill myself because I go numb when I cut. In the past couple years I've been in and out of the hospital. I spent 6 months in a partial hospitalization program before they gave up on me. I've been in a mentalization based therapy program for the past year, but it hasn't been very helpful. My family thought it might help if I got a psychiatric service dog, but I can't because one of my flatmates is deathly allergic to dogs. It doesn't seem like any amount of therapy or medication has made me want to stay alive. All I can do is cut to distract myself from wanting to die. I understand that there are a couple of people that would be hurt by me killing myself, but why should I constantly suffer just so a couple of people can go about their happy lives? If they want me to be alive so fucking bad then they shouldn't leave me when I need someone the most.

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Sorry if this is rudePeople are vague about what is going on that's causing them to be suicidal like I get why but still I've never seen a full out explanation of why someone wanted to commit die I've always wondered what is so bad that goes on in one's life to lead them to it, this is probably weird sounding but I kind of want to hear a full account of what goes on that drives someone to their breaking point

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Anybody wanna join my minecraft java server? It's purely survival on 1.16.1. Hoping we could build stuff together. Dm me if you would like to join.

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Go Eat warm toast with butter and experience heaven. Do it. Im having some rn and its so Damn good

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I've had flashing visions of my suicide for yearsAny time I'm stressed and sometimes when I'm not I'll have a vision of me killing myself. Most of the time I have no control over it. But the rest of the time I end up actively worrying about it, making it worse. Has anyone else had anything like this? I've had a particularly stressful few months and I'm just getting so tired of it. I'm able to rationally think myself out of any situation for the moment but I can see it going either way at this point.

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I HAVE LEFT MY JOB AND THIS IS MY LAST PAYSLIP PLEASE HELPhttps://i.paste.pics/4TL59.png CAN SOMEBODY PLEASE EXPLAIN ME WHAT DOES HALV MEANS?

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Me explaining to my mom what "based" means If I walked out onto the street in 1950s moscow and shouted "stalin is responsible for the deaths of millions of people in the ukraine", I'd be an idiot, but I'd also be based.

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I attempted suicide and obviously failed in the year 2004. People told me things would get better. They don'tLife gets harder as you get older. I have even more problems than I did back then. I tried to improve my life by going to school but now I will have nothing but poverty, homelessness, and debt that will follow me to the grave. One of the worst parts is that there has not been ONE SINGLE DAY since then where I have felt glad that I did not succeed. It has been nothing but a dark, painful, miserable journey. All I ask for mow is the guts to go through with it and get it over with. Don't tell people things will get better. legalize euthanasia so people don't have to die in a horrifying, painful, and messy way. We have to because this world is NOT for everyone.

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Someone VC w me on discord I'm bored as hell idc who tf you are Dm me for my #

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I just want her back.Me and my ex girlfriend had been going out for over a year. I loved her more than anything and to be honest I still do. She was my whole life, we did everything together, we went out pretty much every night and every weekend. She was my only friend We broke up because she constantly lied to me, she didn't show up when we planned to go out the day after I tried to kill myself. She didn't come to school for over two weeks and she went out with her "friend" who she promised she would stay away from as she keeps trying to make her take drugs. It got to the point where on the night I broke with her, I flipped a coin, if it were heads I would break up with her and if it were tails I would kill myself. Thankfully it was heads but I'm getting back to that stage again. At school I have no friends anymore, when I try to approach anyone to try to become friends with them they just tell me to fuck off or something like that, so at lunch I just wonder about on my own and everyone just points and laughs at me I can't even try to be friends with my ex because she can't even look at me and she won't tell me why. It's eating me up. I can't live like this anymore. I just want to wrap my arms around her and never let go. She is so intelligent and beautiful. She is the most amazing girl I have ever met. Now she has started to walk around with the "friend" who I mentioned before, that "friend" made my life hell for months, she is the reason why I have cut myself on many occasions, she also told her (My ex) to kill herself constantly to the point where she was about to. I just want her back, I can't live without her anymore. If she doesn't even say hello to me by next Friday, I'm just going to go and hang myself because I can't take it anymore

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Dead on the insideI feel like shit all the time, my wife no longer loves me, I've been cutting up and down my legs so nobody will notice for weeks now, I can't find any patch of unscathed skin to cut anymore... I just want to end it... I can't even bring myself to get out of bed today... I've been blowing off my friends and family for a while now too... It just feels like everything is crumbling... How can I get out of this slump?

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Boys and girls there a reason we wear hoods even when it’s sprinkling Because a tree will drop a giant drop of water right on face and it will get you all wet.

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kinda wanna dienothing really too it just fucking hate everything rn. Dont feel like I have anyone true to me

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are u banned from a subreddit? if yes, why and which one

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Can constant masturbation lead to disinterest in girls? Asking for a friend FILLER FILLER FILLER FILLER FILLER FILLER FILLER FILLER FILLER FILLER FILLER FILLER FILLER FILLER FILLER FILLER FILLER FILLER FILLER FILLER FILLER FILLER FILLER FILLER

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How do I give support for someone I'm growing to despise?Little background: Few years ago my parents got a divorce and my mom began a (somewhat abusive) relationship with someone. Last year my dad died. Shortly before my dad's funeral it became evident to my mom that she was being cheated on and the dude was going to leave her. So at our dad's funeral my mom was crying, not because her ex-husband had died but, because her boyfriend had left her (I know that my parents marriage had ended and she didn't need to feel bad about it, but to me it was extremelly disrespectful to me and my siblings --- at the moment nobody knew why she was so sad). Few days later, we were stil mourning our dad's death and the reason for her sadness showed up... Now because her boyfriend have left her she is treatning to kill herself. Jesus Christ, My 50 years old mother is treatning to kill herself because her 36 years old boyfriend have left her! She became insuferable, her facebook is filled with disgusting messages, posts and whatnot about how everyone is garbage and life have no meaning; she have turned away any attempt of help from any relative. She treats her 73 yo mother like shit (I believe that in her head my grandma have something to do with her being dump). She spent her new years eve on a psych clinic but isn't taking any medicine because of no apparent reason and I think that she is straight up lying to her doctors. She is just making the lives of everyone miserable (and for me, because of the most retarded reason possible) and I don't know how to deal with it... before I try to help and just making everything worse: how do I give support if I can't stand her reasons and am in fact disgusted by it and by her actions? What should I do? --- I am aware that I am the asshole in the situation for not respecting her reasons and being in general pissed at my own mother; don't need to bring that up. Or bring it, I don't know. If the text seems off it's my fault as my English is not so great as I think.

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i dont want to live anymoreI'm having a hard time because of my mother. I try to make my own things and she gets mad at me if she doesn't like it. I don't do things that are generally bad like skipping classes or failing my classes. I study a lot and get high grades but when I do one small thing she doesn't like she shouts at me and she takes away things of mine. I usually walk home in my area to save money and she got mad at me for it. I really wanted to save up to go to a workshop because I dont want her to take overtime or work a part time job to get me that thing I can honestly save up for. When she knew about it she got mad at me and will take away half of my allowance that I need for other things. It honestly feels horrible at this point because it keeps happening over and over. She doesn't care about what I say about it at all. She just gets mad at me. I can't go to my other relatives because they'll send me back. I can't run away because running away in my country isn't really a good idea. I really cant take it anymore. I really just cant.

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I don't know what to do anymoreI'm 17, I've been depressed for 8 months and had thoughts of killing myself for 6, but its really getting to the point where I just want to end it. Nothing I do is fun anymore, everything I used to do slowly got consumed by frustration. I see a therapist and take medicine, but neither really help. I have a friend who talks to me almost every day and she is pretty much the only reason I haven't done it, but I'm feeling like a nuisance to her. She's says a lot of the things I say to her are making her angry because she doesn't understand why I do/would want to do some of the things I say I started to self harm a little bit, just scratching, but I really am thinking of cutting or more likely just ending my life soon. Idk what I'm trying to say with this, but I just want to die.

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just spent 78 dollars on teen titans season 1-5 hows ur day i feel guilty cause it was my dads money but it was worth it :) okay i actually feel bad but whenever i ask my parents if i can buy something they always say yes, like even expensive things ($60) anyways i have learned my lesson

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Who’s denser then Tungsten? It’s me I’ll keep this short so don’t expect good English and or full sentences. Last week was hanging out with friends at girls house. Get on topic of hu somehow. She says she’s had people hu in her bed but not her. Looks at me says my name and says u need to get w someone in my bed. I say u first (this is just coincidence I didn’t think anything of it). Later on everyone’s hanging out she says to me let’s go upstairs. Dumbass me says we’re having fun let’s stay down here. Kill me.

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I'm so tired...I've just gotta vent I'm sick of the pain. I'm sick of never feeling good enough. I'm sick of feeling worthless, sick of feeling like I don't deserve anything good. I'm sick of being afraid of everything. This has gotten so out of hand and I'm really worried about where it's going to take me. I never used to struggle with suicidal thoughts but now they're practically the only ones I have. I want to get help but I'm so afraid to reach out. My therapist already knows but she doesn't know the extent to which I have these thoughts. I don't know what to do. I'm so tired of feeling like this, I just want this to be over, I want to be happy again...

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I'm ending it on new year's day.I've posted on here before and the only response was a troll comment so idk why I'm posting again. I guess I just need to organize my thoughts somehow. I've been looking for a better job for well over a year now and I can't even get anyone to look at my resume. Ive been applying to several jobs a day, I actually have my default tabs set to job boards that I search and apply on in my spare time. Since I started I have has 4 interviews but they offered me less that I am making now even with my hours and responsibilities being cut. I want to work so bad it is literally killing me inside that no-one will even look at my resume, or won't offer me a living wage. I just found our that my rent is going up. One of my bills has also doubled because of a late fee since I couldn't afford to pay it on time. I am just so done. I hate myself and I hate my life but kost of all I hate living. For the first time since I moved out on my own I wasn't able to pay rent this month and my roommate had to make up the difference. It's looking like that will happen again next month and on top of that I have no idea how I can afford to pay my bills now. My savings is gone, cost of living is rising, and I am just a burden on those around me. I'm tired of being a burden on others and I'm tired of working a dead end job that I despise knowing that no matter how hard I try I will never get out of it. I'm going to end it. My dad has inherited some guns over the years, he doesn't like using them, so he just keeps them locked up. I know how to get in to the safe. I am going to find a day I can go over there while they are at work and steal one. I don't want to live to see 2020. I don't want to live anymore. I'm just tired of being in pain all the time. I'm tired of constantly feeling like I am drowning.

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Greetings r/SW. Today I took it a step further and wrote it out....I actually wrote out my last day...I think this is a very negative turn of events. Does anyone have the patience to listen to my story?

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I want to put my family through this.I am 23 years old and my entire family (four siblings and my mom) stopped talking to me last month. They also stopped letting me talk to or see my nieces 6 months ago. I was manic and delusional and put in the hospital for three weeks before they stopped talking to me. I was stable after a few days but that's how it works (especially when you have good insurance). My brothers took my dog to the pound while I was in the hospital, that devastated me and I was pissed at them when I got discharged. My family said they would stop talking to me if I didn't go to "psych rehab" (I haven't ever done illegal substances either than weed) but I wasn't about to be locked up again after having been locked up for three weeks. Or do what they say after they betrayed me like that. I think what my family did to me and is doing to me now is disgusting, it fills me with rage and sadness because I also feel like at this point I can't (and shouldn't) ever forgive them. They will never apologize and I don't see how that gets fixed without an apology. I have all the criteria for suicide and have been suicidal in the past, I can't believe they are abandoning me like this it puts me at a higher risk for suicide and I wish I would do it just to make them feel bad. Just to get them to see the seriousness of the situation. I'd love to post on facebook that the decision was made because on top of feeling like I have nothing left to live for and feeling like I can't cope with my pyschiatric issues anymore (or the side effects of the medications) my family doesn't care what happens to me either so what's the point? They have used me to vent their anger, made me into a joke and used me as a scapegoat my entire life but especially this year. I'm so fucking sick of being left out and abused I wish I could get back at them somehow.

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Oct 22 2016Jag vill dö.

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I think I'm done.I see no point in continuing my life. It has been so long since I became disillusioned with this world; the pointless cycle of work and pain to enjoy such small things for such a small time, the uncaring populace that hurts and abuses itself, the vast majority that feel no empathy. I see all of these reflected in myself too, another idiotic follower of the human condition, driven purely by emotion and not by logic. Why anyone would want to live in such a torturous existence is beyond my understanding. I was born too early to escape it, too. Perhaps a few hundred years in the future space travel may have advanced to a level whereby some reasonable scale of exploration is possible, and I could just leave this hellhole behind, and things may have been different. But as it stands I will be long dead under any circumstances, unable to see the one thing I have dreamed of. Only music and video games have stood between me and this. They allowed me to hide my dissatisfaction with the world inside myself and ignore it, so I didn't have to deal with it. But they haven't worked now for a good few months. The one time I found something besides those that I thought may have been worth living for was brutally wrenched from me. This is not a decision I have made without considerable thought. The last couple of months have shown to me just how much I hate this world. Knowing that so many other people feel the same has solidified this. Nothing I have tried has helped. No antidepressants, no therapy, no thought mechanism has eased the pain. The one person I had trust in and who could help me ran away into the arms of another man, and now I am at wit's end. Nothing stands between me and the hell and that I always tried to avoid, so what's the point in even trying to live with it. I just want to fall asleep and never wake up, never have to feel a thing again. I want to be free from the tyranny of sadness and depression, free from the cage of anxiety and panic. I want to die.

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Read my old suicide note tonightRead my old suicide note tonight A while back (couple months ago, so not too long ago) when my mental state was particularly bad I wrote out a suicide note. I didn’t have anything to say to my parents or any of my friends except one. I don’t feel like I need to give an explanation, I’d rather my issues die with me rather than existing in other people’s heads. I wrote the letter to the only friend who I’ve fully opened up to, and I was prepared to do it. Instead, I went to sleep. I’ve been struggling lately so I went back and read that note and got this strange sense of comfort. It made me feel so relaxed, maybe it was the idea that if I’d gotten that close to killing myself before and hadn’t, I could do it again.

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Is it selfish telling someone?I'm thinking about opening up to one of my cousins. I'm not really close to him or anything, but he comes down to visit the uni I go to sometimes since he recently graduated. He also tried to get me into his frat and all, but I also feel like I let him down as I left during the process. I want to open up on how I tried committing and the other mental problems I have. I don't want a pity party or anything like that, I just want someone to know, especially family (as I'm usually always the 'loner' and don't really mingle well with others). But, I'm hesitant because I don't know if I'll try to commit again. I don't want for him to get hurt and all because of that (even though he'll probably already feel bad about me dying, but I don't want it to torment him or something).

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What's the easiest way to kill myselfPlease don't put "don't kill yourself we need you!" Or anything in the comments, I'll do it with or without your help, but for my sake I hope you help me. I'm 15 I have 2 mentally abusive parents. I've been able to stop their abuse for a while by doing everything they want but now I'm failing school. It's started every thing back up so much worse. I get really full from my big school lunches but my mom forces me to eat when I come home, but then when I eat she asks why I'm being a pig. Im healthy but it's not enough. Im trying to juggle school and their chores for me but I can't. I'm sorry, I'm a coward and I know it. I can't run away because I don't want to be out there alone, I'm scared of what would happen to me since I'm a girl. I've tried looking into national runaway service but I would need a safe place to stay I really need y'all's help. I'm to much of a coward to cut or hang myself or anything violent but we don't have any pills that could do the job. What can I do? I can't last here 3 more years I just can't, I had a boyfriend that was helping me a while back but they texted him pretending to be me and started a huge fight with them and then they blocked him on my phone. He was so sweet and kind and it's been months since that happened so I'm sure he's so mad at me he wouldn't even consider helping me at this point. I have no one else. Please help me

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I need some helpI feel really terrible right now I spent the entire day burning my self with matches. I really need to talk to anyone to help me feel better or I'm not sure I'll wake up tomorrow

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I'm probably mad to post this and I regret you reading it I'm not over emotional. Or at least, I'm not the kind who cries in movies or songs. And I hate to cry. So why in the hell could I not go through one night this week without crying?? I could never relate to all you guys saying "I feel so alone" or "I'm depressed" and I always felt like an outsider in this sense. I mean, I have a great life and I don't like people complaining when they have a great life too! I won't go into details here (simply because it's boring) but I consider the life I'm leading extremely lucky. And suddenly it was like a "welcome to the club" moment. And I always ask myself, *what changed?* Is this a teenager phase that will pass soon? Or is this more... real? I have no friends other than two guys I met online and never actually met. I can't find myself. I have a beautiful family: but it just feels like they don't know me. I'm constantly bored. And I go on walks everyday just to get out of this life - even if it's just for an hour. And seriously, why? As I said, I have a great life. So what changed? I don't know why I'm writing this and I don't know why you are reading this, but it feels good somehow to do this. So thanks I guess. ​ P.S: You can go back to scrolling through memes now

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The only thing keeping me alive is my childBut lately I think she’s better off with a mother who isn’t mentally ill. Her father and I split and he would be able to find her someone better. My parents wouldn’t have to worry about me. Anyone can hire a new nurse my job wouldn’t miss me. I’m so tired of not being good enough. I’m never good enough and I just want it to stop

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rating u from 1-10 based on instincts alone and looking at ur profile kinda

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Anybody else enjoy cooking/baking for others? Made my boyfriend cookie marbled brownies yesterday and he loved them! Ngl it makes me so happy how much he loves my cooking. I’m currently learning how to Khmer (his ethnicity) food for him. He’s got a big appetite so whenever he asks me to make him something and seeing how quickly he eats it all is amazing

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What sin did I do in a previous life that had me be born a short man?Why and how am I not able to meet their height standard I'm nothing that girls want It's clear on both social media and in real life that girls don't desire short men at all, and we should just go and die somewhere or something My dad doesn't allow me to save up with *my own* money to get a leg-lengthening surgery, what's supposed to be my final hope of redemption I will do anything to look good, to have the right to exist, and I can't even do that. I just want to die

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Does anyone not want to help themselves? Because I don't...I'm at the point where I don't want to try anymore. I've tried it all, and I've been wanting to die since I was 12 years old (I'm 28/F). Now, I've successfully sabotaged my life so that I lost my job, my boyfriend, I'm pushing my friends/family away. All I want to do is make sure my family doesn't have to deal with too much of the aftermath. I used to want to try. I spent countless years researching all to know about mental health/psychology, the different therapies to treat them, therapy, exercise, hobbies, relationships, creating things....I'm just all out of fight and I feel like that's too pathetic. My boyfriend is leaving me because I don't have the will to live anymore.... I want things to be over so badly.

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These stupid ads >:( I’m just scrolling through reddit in the dark abyss of my room. Then this bright ass ad slides through and singes my cornea. The ad isn’t even good, they’re just trying to sell me baby yoda underwear. Like I don’t even want it. Well thats the rant. Good night and I bid your eyes good luck.

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This is the only place I can talk about thisUsing a throwaway account because I need to get this off of my chest but I’m scared of speaking out fully as people I know irl know my reddit account. For the last five years I’ve been slowly growing more and more sad and upset with life due to my own stupid mistakes. I have a loving family and sure we don’t always get along but I love them all to pieces. The stupid mistakes I made haunt me to this day, no one knows about them besides me and the people involved, and that kills me. I have so many passions I want to pursue, like my singing or my art however I’m terrified that if my face gets out there one day I’ll wake up to hear everyone I love knows what I did. I was so so fucking stupid and if I could go back I would have stopped myself. It was only five years ago I found out what I did shouldn’t have happened, that I should have never done it and since then it’s been creeping up on me and eating away at me. I can’t tell anyone about it who I care about and if I went to see a doctor and looked for help, I’d be scared someone would find out, I’m scared I’d break down, I’m scared I’d lose my place in college. I’ve thought about killing myself so many times, I even tired not taking my crohns and colitis medication for a while, hoping this illness would kill me slowly, but kill me none the less, but my mother soon found the full pill boxes and injections. It feels like a huge weight is being dropped on my head. I wasn’t forced to do what I did, I was a stupid child who didn’t know what they were getting into or how bad what they were doing was. I was naive and now it’ll haunt me for the rest of my life, however long that’ll be anyways. Thank you for reading this strangers of Reddit. This is the first and only time I’ll ever get to say these words.

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If he leaves me, I lose everything.I will have to quit school. Move back in with my parents who do nothing but cut me down. Stop seeing friends regularly. Stop volunteering. Lose everything. Start from scratch. Lose him. I love him so much and – I know the answer is always “you *will* find love again!” – but I won’t. Not this time. You don’t understand how much I love him. My whole life is over if he leaves me tonight. The grief aside, my life will logistically be over and I’ll have to go back to spending all of my time at home alone because I can’t drive and can’t afford to move out of my parents house in the middle of nowhere to somewhere with public transit. I will have to either drop out of school or wake up at 3am every single day and walk an hour in the snow to catch an early bus into the city. And no more of my sweet best friend at home to make the struggle feel worth it. It feels like a truck is sitting on my chest and I can’t focus, can’t study, can’t rest, can’t stop shaking.

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MY TEACHER GRADED MY AP CALCULUS TEST AND I GOT A 100! I got a 100 on the MC part on Thursday but then I grinded out a shit ton of problems over the weekend and I did it! My first 100 on an AP Calculus test! LETS GO!

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I hate the reddit hivemind If your opinion differs even slightly from the generally leftist points of view on most subs, then you get so, so much hate. Harsh personal insults from people who claim that they are fighting against bullying. The hypocrisy. Calling your opinion "not real" and '"bullshit" while flaunting their own. Keep in mind I said nothing sexist or racist, just appropriately shared my opinion on a sub. I knew it would get hate but how could I know that full grown adults would act so immature and attack someone for having a different opinion. I am not right wing in any way, but I can see how people can turn into bitter far right racists with equally terrible views from this. I hate people who claim to have an open mind but have no room accepting that people with different opinions exist. My comment on r/niceguys may have been unpopular, and I'm not offended by what people say, just shocked that grown adults can be such shitty people hiding behind a screen. I pray to a god, if one exists that I never become as bitter and close-minded as they are. You can check my post history for yourself and see if you think my opinion was worth me being called many names by people almost three times my age. I also inboxed a redditor to explain my point of view but somehow she claimed it was inappropriate and sexual. Like wtf. Anyways, thats my rant, basic " I hate the haters" rant.

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WHAT THE HELL JUST HAPPENED my sister was in her zoom call for her class and someone walked in the teacher’s classroom claiming to be someone else and said that they didn’t take the test that they were supposed to be taking cus he was jacking off in the bathroom?? hybrid really be fucking people up I was in another zoom call but I was in the same room with her like goddamn

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Does anyone know why people keep talking about August 27th? Where did it come from and why do people think it’s so important? Bruh I hope something special actually does happen Or not maybe something bad will happen

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Last ditch effortWhen I was a kid I was abused by my biological dad. I've had a speech impediment my entire life that makes me sound mentally ill. No one takes me seriously. When I was in middle school I was relentlessly bullied. On my second year of college I was diagnosed with Luekemia. Unfortunately, it didn't kill me. My mom and dad divorced and it was so ugly. After I dropped out I realized I was trans. Now every day someone says something to me about how I'm a pervert or a freak. People online are so vile. My anxiety has been ruthless since I was a child. I can't hold a job because I get too scared to go in after the 3rd day. I'm 25 years old, don't have a job, can't keep one. I'm fat. I'm bald. I'm trans. I don't have any worth because I can't labor and so I'm just a parasite on my dad and mom. Every job I attempt (dozens) ive failed at. Its so much. When i do work i come home crying, and in the mornings before i go in i get so scared I throw up. But you need money to live and I dont wanna keep being a burden and pathetic I don't know what to do. I've tried dozens of medications. Multiple therapists. I was on disability for a while for the cancer, but it ended now. I'm too anxious to leave the house. I'm too anxious to make phone calls or work or do anything. What options do I even have left besides killing myself? I'm sorry that this is just a bunch of self pity. I just tried to list things

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I just want to stop being in so much pain. Please, I need some help and someone to vent to.

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Should I leave a note?I am a 20 year old female. My parents decided that it was a good idea to have a baby with someone they met at AA and subsequently divorced when I was 4. I've been in therapy since I was 8. My first psychiatric inpatient admission was when I was 16 but once I graduated high school, everything went downhill. I've tried university but it's so lonely. I'm supposed to be in my 4th year but I barely have enough credits for a single year. I was in the gifted program so all of my high school friends are out there achieving great things and I'm just here binging and purging. Since I've turned 18, I've spent aprox. 10 months, mostly of a form(involuntary), in a psych ward. I've tried ECT twice and I'm only 20. I'm scared that it gave me brain damage because my memory is still fucked. I've tried about 20 different medications. Well, I see a social worker, psychiatrist, and a therapist weekly. I'm on disability. Would it really be that much of a surprise to my loved ones? It'd be selfish of them to want me to continue to live this way. I'm diagnosed with Bipolar II, BPD and Bulimia Nervosa. I am just a failure and a burden. There is nothing to look forward to except misery. My friends leave me. My mother just complains about how much money I cost her. Everyone is going to die and I have such trust/abandonment issues that I cannot trust my bf not to cheat on me. I can't tell my psychiatrist that I got the pharmacy to refill that bottle of pills security wrestled from me because he will just put me back on a psych ward. I just want to die. There is no hope at all. I don't want to wait until I'm 30 and just be in a worse position. There's no god because a god wouldn't let someone live in such agony. What have I done to deserve this? I try to go to school and smile but it just feels like I am attempting to evade my destiny. Besides a living will that will say to take me off life support if heavily brain damaged, is there much point in leaving a note at this point? It's pretty much expected at this point. Thank you for reading. Please no "you're only 20" posts. Please.

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The days just keep comingAnother day another struggle.

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Can't think clearly anymoreI've just lost my grandfather only a week after another family member suddenly passed as well. I've had suicidal thoughts for the longest time yet haven't talked to anyone about it because I could lose my job. Every day I try to look positively at everything but I don't know how much longer I can put up the act. I'm sick of hurting people and sick of all of my lies.

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Bruh what is boris gonna do for kids and grandparents with Christmas Feel like Boris should shut the schools 2 weeks before Christmas break to reduce the risk so kids can meet up with their family like normal without worrying about the virus

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I'm just doneI have vaginismus and I lost faith in friendship. I don't care about life anymore. I would like to die

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My crush just asked me out. Then she told me it was a joke. Guys, please don’t do this. It’s cruel and unnecessary. It’s okay if you don’t like someone that likes you, but don’t play with their emotions. Please. F

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dinosaurs and dragons are very cool we need more of them. society has progressed past the need of an actual plot to a story. i just want a story about dragoms and dinosaurs hanging out with each other and having a grand time.

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I have 27 pages of sheet music So I auditioned as a singer for this music school, and I got in, we are doing a Christmas performance and we’ve been given our sheet music. I can’t read sheet music so I don’t know what I’m doing. I don’t know who I’m meant to ask for help from and I’m panicking.

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I've been suicidal for 15 years, why am I still alive?I'm turning 26 next month. I've been suicidal since I was 11. More than half of my life. Looking at the math, I feel like a fraud. I feel like I should have killed myself already. Survivor's guilt maybe? Why haven't I done it yet? Hope or cowardice?

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Help..? IdkI've been thinking about this since my first attempt. Which was years ago. My life is just so insignificant, and everything I do I don't like. I just want to end it. I know no one really cares. My mom has even threatened to put me in the hospital (said when I did my second attempt) if I cut or tried again and I have told no one because I'm scared. Maybe it will be better if I was gone. I know no one cares, but i want to live, but this world is so hard and so scary. Always thinking about what is wrong with everyone and everything. I'm only posting this because I feel somewhat safe. Yannow, being anoymus and all. Im always suffering, even when I'm laying around doing what I want, I guess I just want someone to care? I don't know what u want anymore. I have a therapist but I'm scared to tell her about some stuff. Being scared of people, basically everything. It's so tiring. I'm always tired. Another thing that bothers me is that I'll always be alone. Even when with people. It's a suffocating feeling, all the time. If I do do it,and succeed, I want my parents to take better care of the cats, like I do and I want j and c to each have half of my kpop belongings. (sorry I sound like a 5 year old) I want my brother to keep going and act like nothing happened, I know he's always wanted to be an only child. I just want to give up. This is so hard to type out. But I need to get this off my chest. I hope no one I know will find this and confront me. If you do know me, don't say anything, thank you.

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We just broke Wall Street, and I know what we should do next We should find a small youtuber, maybe 1,000 subs, and we should all subscribe to him at the same time. I know, I’m kind of a genius

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What the heck is blue balls? I’d look it up but I think I’d like my answers a lot more if they were from weird an horny teenagers :)

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is this normal?? is it normal for me to hang out in comment sections and look at profiles and be like "wow i wish i could talk to them bc they look really cool" but not act upon it at all?

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Hey guys, Hey guys, I'm sad, and I need to find stuff to do to stop thinking about things, so give me ideas of stuff to do and I'll do them :)

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I'm just so tiredCurrently in college, and doing terrible. Girl I was falling for decided to leave me last week and stop talking to me. I'm just so tired, I've had so many sleepless nights, and I've been depressed for so long, I'm just ready to end it, and get the sleep I deserve.

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You Wanna Get More Karma?? No you'll not get it.

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