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I'm hungry but that kind of hungry where you don't want to eat anything because it might make you feel sick You know what I mean? # #####################################################################
[]
[ "I'm hungry but that kind of hungry where you don't want to eat anything because it might make you feel sick You know what I mean?# #####################################################################" ]
34
Tengo hambre pero ese tipo de hambre donde no quieres comer nada porque podría hacerte sentir mal ¿Sabes lo que quiero decir?
People say it gets better, but it doesn't.My life has been sheer hell for close to a decade now. I have been in a constant state of pain and terror and depression for almost half my life. People always used to say "don't kill yourself it will get better!" But it doesn't. I have sort of stopped talking to people about my suffering because it feels like they will either just lie to me or don't know what they are talking about. I have been walking up and down a local bridge near me considering climbing off and jumping off.
[ "selfharm" ]
[ "People say it gets better, but it doesn't.My life has been sheer hell for close to a decade now.I have been in a constant state of pain and terror and depression for almost half my life.People always used to say \"don't kill yourself it will get better!\"But it doesn't.I have sort of stopped talking to people about my suffering because it feels like they will either just lie to me or don't know what they are talking about.I have been walking up and down a local bridge near me considering climbing off and jumping off." ]
119
La gente dice que se pone mejor, pero no lo hace.Mi vida ha sido un infierno desde hace casi una década.He estado en un estado constante de dolor, terror y depresión durante casi la mitad de mi vida.La gente siempre solía decir "¡no te mates a ti mismo se pondrá mejor!"Pero no lo hace.He dejado de hablar con la gente sobre mi sufrimiento porque se siente como si simplemente me mintieran o no supieran de lo que están hablando.He estado caminando arriba y abajo de un puente local cerca de mí considerando subir y saltar.
I’m afraid to die, but I’m afraid to live tooThe pain is too great. The self loathing is too much. I can’t bear it. All I’m thinking about right now is walking in front of a train. It would be so easy. There’s a track that’s practically in my back yard. But part of me wants to stay. There’s stuff I still wanna do. But.... I’m broken and I can’t be fixed. All I do is make low effort shitposts every day. I’m trash. I don’t deserve the life I’ve been given.
[ "selfharm" ]
[ "I’m afraid to die, but I’m afraid to live tooThe pain is too great.The self loathing is too much.I can’t bear it.All I’m thinking about right now is walking in front of a train.It would be so easy.There’s a track that’s practically in my back yard.But part of me wants to stay.There’s stuff I still wanna do.But....\n\nI’m broken and I can’t be fixed.All I do is make low effort shitposts every day.I’m trash.I don’t deserve the life I’ve been given." ]
136
Tengo miedo de morir, pero también tengo miedo de vivirEl dolor es demasiado grande.El odio a mí mismo es demasiado.No puedo soportarlo.Todo lo que estoy pensando ahora mismo es en caminar delante de un tren.Sería tan fácil.Hay una pista que está prácticamente en mi patio trasero.Pero parte de mí quiere quedarse.Hay cosas que todavía quiero hacer.Pero... Estoy roto y no puedo arreglarme.Todo lo que hago es hacer pequeños postes de mierda cada día.Soy basura.No merezco la vida que me han dado.
what is something you want to accomplish in the next 2 years? whether it’s big or small, what are your goals or plans?
[]
[ "what is something you want to accomplish in the next 2 years?whether it’s big or small, what are your goals or plans?" ]
28
¿Qué es algo que quieres lograr en los próximos 2 años?, ya sea grande o pequeño, ¿cuáles son tus metas o planes?
My Simp friend Jayden's story Everyone has that guy in their friends group right? The king of simp that can't control his actions whenever they sense estrogen. I have him too. His name is Jayden. Jayden Lee Jayden is a pretty chill dude when he's with the bois. He acts normal and is a nice dude to be with. But then, the moment a girl approaches him, he turns into a simp. Now a girl doesn't even have to talk or look at him. She just has to be within a 10 meter radius. If a girl is watching him play basketball, you can expect a 10 percent performance boost from him. Simple. Now Jayden and I have a mutual female friend. Yes, a female friend. Now you might be able to guess what Jayden does to her. He SIMPS HARD via text. Every text he sends her becomes an evidence for my anti-Jayden-simp movement. Thankfully my mutual female friend screenshots and reports every simp stuff Mr.J does to me. I'll be listing what he did. "Your adorable cutie Jayden has arrived~~^^❤️❤️❤️" *Send his selfie video trying to look handsome except he looks ridiculous *Calling her cute names Now we've probably only scratched the surface here and my investigation will need more sources. Who knows what other simp things he's done. Now if you've read this far, please comment "Stop simping Jayden" so he can stop. I'll screenshot your every comment and send it to him. Let's end this simp.
[]
[ "My Simp friend Jayden's story Everyone has that guy in their friends group right?The king of simp that can't control his actions whenever they sense estrogen.I have him too.His name is Jayden.Jayden Lee\n\nJayden is a pretty chill dude when he's with the bois.He acts normal and is a nice dude to be with.But then, the moment a girl approaches him, he turns into a simp.Now a girl doesn't even have to talk or look at him.She just has to be within a 10 meter radius.If a girl is watching him play basketball, you can expect a 10 percent performance boost from him.Simple.Now Jayden and I have a mutual female friend.Yes, a female friend.Now you might be able to guess what Jayden does to her.He SIMPS HARD via text.Every text he sends her becomes an evidence for my anti-Jayden-simp movement.Thankfully my mutual female friend screenshots and reports every simp stuffMr.J does to me.I'll be listing what he did.\"Your adorable cutie Jayden has arrived~~^^❤️❤️❤️\"\n\n*Send his selfie video trying to look handsome except he looks ridiculous\n\n*Calling her cute namesNow we've probably only scratched the surface here and my investigation will need more sources.Who knows what other simp things he's done.", "Now if you've read this far, please comment \"Stop simping Jayden\" so he can stop.I'll screenshot your every comment and send it to him.Let's end this simp." ]
296
La historia de mi amigo Simp Jayden Todo el mundo tiene a ese tipo en su grupo de amigos ¿verdad?El rey de simp que no puede controlar sus acciones cuando sienten estrógeno.Yo también lo tengo.Su nombre es Jayden.Jayden Lee Jayden es un tipo bastante frío cuando está con el bois. Actúa normal y es un buen tipo con el que estar.Pero entonces, en el momento en que una chica se acerca a él, se convierte en un simp.Ahora una chica ni siquiera tiene que hablar ni mirarlo.Ella solo tiene que estar dentro de un radio de 10 metros.Si una chica lo está viendo jugar baloncesto, puedes esperar un aumento del 10 por ciento del rendimiento de él.Simple.Ahora Jayden y yo tenemos una amiga femenina mutua.Sí, una amiga femenina.Ahora podrías ser capaz de adivinar lo que Jayden hace con ella.Él SEÑA HARD vía texto.Cada texto que le envíe se convierte en una evidencia para mi movimiento anti-Jayden-simp.
Funny schoolwork I should be doing school work but im scrolling tru reddit and watching RLCX. Can any of you guys give me ways to focus on work?
[]
[ "Funny schoolwork I should be doing school workbut im scrolling tru reddit and watching RLCX.Can any of you guys give me ways to focus on work?" ]
36
Trabajo escolar divertido que debería estar haciendo trabajo escolar, pero estoy desplazando tru reddit y viendo RLCX.¿Puede alguno de ustedes me dan maneras de centrarse en el trabajo?
Posting something till I get a bird #8 Posting something every day till I get a bird I’ve seen a lot of people posting “posting something every day till I get a boyfriend/girlfriend”. Sounds fun. I have a girlfriend though. She’s wonderful. I want a bird too. Birds are cool. So here’s day 1. Day 1: I made sushi for lunch today but ended up eating at 4 because turns out it takes a while to make Day 2: holy shit i got some awesome comments on #1 specifically u/bird_is_god thanks again. anyways today I ate some pizza and played lacrosse. still no bird yet. Day 3: just found r/skamtebord. I have been audibly laughing for 15 minutes Day 4: have any of you guys watched lost? The show about the plane crash. I just decided to rewatch it, it’s a great show. Day 5: gf just got back from a camping trip. I’m looking forward to seeing her again. Also I finally got around to killing the dungeon guardian in terraria. Day 6: learned a new song in the piano today, a car a torch a death by twenty one pilots. Also, have you guys ever had a tomato basil mozzarella sandwich on a baguette with olive oil and aged balsamic vinegar with salt and pepper? Because that’s my favorite sandwich to make it’s it’s really fuckin good. Day 7: stripping paint off cement was easier than I though it would be. Pretty cool. Also I’m posting this for a second time because I’m stupid and thought this was day 6 again Day 8: I went on a bike ride with my girlfriend today. That was nice. Also, if any of you guys are good at math, math tutoring is easy money. You can charge $20/hour and a lot of parents will pay that if you help their kid with math.
[]
[ "Posting something till I get a bird #8 Posting something every day till I get a bird\n\nI’ve seen a lot of people posting “posting something every day till I get a boyfriend/girlfriend”.Sounds fun.I have a girlfriend though.She’s wonderful.I want a bird too.Birds are cool.So here’s day 1.Day 1: I made sushi for lunch today but ended up eating at 4 because turns out it takes a while to make\n\nDay 2: holy shit i got some awesome comments on #1 specifically u/bird_is_god thanks again.anyways today I ate some pizza and played lacrosse.still no bird yet.Day 3: just found r/skamtebord.I have been audibly laughing for 15 minutes\n\nDay 4: have any of you guys watched lost?The show about the plane crash.I just decided to rewatch it, it’s a great show.Day 5: gf just got back from a camping trip.I’m looking forward to seeing her again.Also I finally got around to killing the dungeon guardian in terraria.Day 6: learned a new song in the piano today, a car a torch a death by twenty one pilots.Also, have you guys ever had a tomato basil mozzarella sandwich on a baguette with olive oil and aged balsamic vinegar with salt and pepper?", "Because that’s my favorite sandwich to make it’s it’s really fuckin good.Day 7: stripping paint off cement was easier than I though it would be.Pretty cool.Also I’m posting this for a second time because I’m stupid and thought this was day 6 again\n\nDay 8: I went on a bike ride with my girlfriend today.That was nice.Also, if any of you guys are good at math, math tutoring is easy money.You can charge $20/hour and a lot of parents will pay that if you help their kid with math." ]
296
Publicar algo hasta que consiga un pájaro #8 Publicar algo todos los días hasta que consiga un pájaro He visto a mucha gente publicar “poner algo todos los días hasta que consiga un novio/novia”.Suena divertido.Tengo una novia sin embargo.Ella es maravillosa.Quiero un pájaro también.Las aves son geniales.Así que aquí es el día 1. Día 1: Hice sushi para almorzar hoy pero terminé comiendo a los 4 porque resulta que toma un tiempo hacer Día 2: mierda sagrada Tengo algunos comentarios impresionantes en #1 específicamente u/bird_is_god gracias de nuevo.Hoy de todos modos me comí pizza y toqué lacrosse.aun no hay pájaro.Día 3: acaba de encontrar r/skamtebord.He estado riendo audiblemente durante 15 minutos Día 4: ¿Alguno de ustedes ha visto perderse?El show sobre el accidente de avión.Yo sólo decidí volver a verlo, es un gran espectáculo.Día 5: gf acaba de volver de un viaje de camping de un día a 15 minutos.
just woke up morning wood grrrrrrrerr
[]
[ "just woke up morning wood grrrrrrrerr" ]
11
Sólo se despertó mañana madera grrrrrrerr
When is it okay to let go?I've been in love with a girl that doesn't love me for over a year, I can never have children and I have no hopes or dreams that are achievable. When there is nothing for me in the future why is it such a bad thing to rush to the finish?
[ "selfharm" ]
[ "When is it okay to let go?I've been in love with a girl that doesn't love me for over a year, I can never have children and I have no hopes or dreams that are achievable.When there is nothing for me in the future why is it such a bad thing to rush to the finish?" ]
66
¿Cuándo está bien dejar ir?He estado enamorado de una chica que no me ama por más de un año, nunca puedo tener hijos y no tengo esperanzas ni sueños que sean alcanzables.Cuando no hay nada para mí en el futuro ¿por qué es tan malo correr hasta el final?
Feeling worse everyday.This last week has been hell for me, I tried telling my parents I was depressed and that I didnt feel like going to school, they seemed moer concerned with my missing school than the fact that I sleep 2 hours every night because im so depressed that I stay up with a knife to my wrists. I dont want to feel this way anymore.
[ "selfharm" ]
[ "Feeling worse everyday.This last week has been hell for me, I tried telling my parents I was depressed and that I didnt feel like going to school, they seemed moer concerned with my missing school than the fact that I sleep 2 hours every night because im so depressed that I stay up with a knife to my wrists.I dont want to feel this way anymore." ]
77
Me siento peor todos los días.Esta semana pasada ha sido un infierno para mí, traté de decirle a mis padres que estaba deprimido y que no tenía ganas de ir a la escuela, parecían estar más preocupados por mi escuela perdida que por el hecho de que duermo 2 horas cada noche porque estoy tan deprimido que me quedo con un cuchillo en las muñecas.No quiero sentirme así más.
Sunken FriendshipsSo, I lost pretty much my entire support group- minus my mother who already has so much on her own plate as things are. Although there's no suicidal ideation currently- this is the same time as last year that I attempted suicide, intentionally crashed my car, and was found in the woods by a bloodhound team after stripping naked and trying to "get lost" and poison myself. Well. I'm thinking about that time a lot and how this year started out with signing a Baker act but is very different because I'm living with family but I totally wrecked my friendships because I would start nosediving, abuse drugs, and take it out on them verbally; always unprovoked. It is totally my fault that I lost them, I accept that we'll never be as close as we were because I made the sick choice of gambling away respect with people who cared, and I believe irreparably burned the bridges by breaking promises, disrespecting rules, and hurling insults while intoxicated. I don't even have a brother anymore but that is the one irreparable relationship that isn't my fault-- but I'm not getting into that. Depression and my other mental ailments will be a part of life forever now, so how do I go about avoiding another dangerous spiral without the support? How can I make relations healthy and keep them that way? I won't be able to live a life of quality if I'm so negative and self loathing that I convince myself not to give things a shot.
[ "selfharm" ]
[ "Sunken FriendshipsSo, I lost pretty much my entire support group-minus my mother who already has so much on her own plate as things are.Although there's no suicidal ideation currently-this is the same time as last year that I attempted suicide, intentionally crashed my car, and was found in the woods by a bloodhound team after stripping naked and trying to \"get lost\" and poison myself.Well.I'm thinking about that time a lot and how this year started out with signing a Baker act but is very different because I'm living with familybut I totally wrecked my friendships because I would start nosediving, abuse drugs, and take it out on them verbally; always unprovoked.It is totally my fault that I lost them, I accept that we'll never be as close as we were because I made the sick choice of gambling away respect with people who cared, and I believe irreparably burned the bridges by breaking promises, disrespecting rules, and hurling insults while intoxicated.I don't even have a brother anymorebut that is the one irreparable relationship that isn't my fault--but I'm not getting into that.", "Depression and my other mental ailments will be a part of life forever now, so how do I go about avoiding another dangerous spiral without the support?How can I make relations healthy and keep them that way?I won't be able to live a life of quality if I'm so negative and self loathing that I convince myself not to give things a shot." ]
250
Ya no tengo un hermano, pero esa es la relación irreparable en la que no tengo la culpa, pero yo no tengo la culpa.Así que perdí casi todo mi grupo de apoyo menos mi madre que ya tiene tanto en su propio plato como las cosas.Aunque no hay idea suicida en la actualidad, es la misma época en la que intenté suicidarme, intencionalmente choqué mi coche y fue encontrada en el bosque por un equipo de sabueso después de desnudarme y tratar de "perderme" y envenenarme a mí misma.Bueno, estoy pensando en ese tiempo mucho y cómo este año comenzó con la firma de un acto de Baker pero es muy diferente porque estoy viviendo con la familia, pero arruiné totalmente mis amistades porque empezaría a bucear, abusar de las drogas y despojarme de ellas verbalmente; siempre sin provocación.Es totalmente culpa mía que las perdiera, acepto que nunca estaremos tan cerca como lo estábamos porque hice la opción enferma de jugar con respeto a la gente que se preocupaba, y creo que irremediablemente quemaba los puentes al romper las promesas, faltando a las reglas y lanzando insultos mientras estoy borracho.
why does my mum watch weirdly sexual dancing videos on YouTube like shes watching one rn on the TV and it's really fucking disturbing me... she is very against anything slighty not modest I'm so confused. cant tell her to turn it off or shes gonna yell at me someone help
[]
[ "why does my mum watch weirdly sexual dancing videos on YouTube like shes watching one rn on the TV and it's really fucking disturbing me... she is very against anything slighty not modest I'm so confused.cant tell her to turn it off or shes gonna yell at me someone help" ]
62
¿Por qué mi mamá ve videos de baile sexual extraño en YouTube como ella está viendo un rn en la televisión y me está molestando... ella está muy en contra de cualquier cosa insignificante no modesta Estoy tan confundido.cantant decirle que apagarlo o ella va a gritarme alguien ayuda
dump perfect bf and fall off the face of the earthI’ll try to keep this brief/to the point bc the details can’t possibly be that interesting to anyone aside from myself but I’m sleep deprived and rambly so sorry in advance. 35 f, been w/wonderful and loving bf for 7 years and living together for 4 years. Spoiler alert: love doesn’t solve everything or fix your fucking head. Depressed since probably forever; first suicide attempt (total fail-got away without anyone knowing bc I was young & lucky) at 15. Had probably a nervous breakdown (wanted to die but chickened out) about 11 years ago, triggered by a bad break-up some months prior. Moved home briefly, basically started life all over again. Did a lot of DIY self-work to get where I am today. Have never been to a therapist or properly diagnosed, oops. I quit my job in September bc I couldn’t get out of bed anymore. I was crying nearly every day from stress and once remote work ended I had to be back in the office w/ asshole supervisor and was scared I’d freak-out in public. While it was a textbook toxic environment and I had the blessing of my bf, given the current situation in our world re:COVID-19 it wasn’t exactly the smartest choice. I was job hunting since May, and though I’d had zero luck/straight rejections, I somehow convinced myself this was the right time, that I would undoubtedly find a better opportunity and purpose. Thanks, broken brain. Now I’m back to feeling worthless after several failed interview and rejection cycles. I have about $200 left in my checking and I just want to give it away to charity bc it’s useless for me if I’m going to off myself soon. Today I cried all day and couldn’t get out of bed again. I have bad days and good days, but most of the time the desire to disappear is in the back of my mind. I honestly don’t know how I’ve gone this long pretending to be “normal.” Functioning enough to have relationships that are healthy, to maintain friendships (even though I’m the “bad friend,” ie the one who’s always cancelling and disappearing and bad at texting back.) To hold down jobs, when I’m able to get them. I just want my bf to have a better life than I am capable of providing. I love him immensely, but I know I’m going to slide further into this shitty place bc this is how my last breakdown started. I don’t think I can get another job right now to at least help w/ money either, and that’s so unfair, because he didn’t sign up to have a mentally ill AND financially unstable partner. I want him to have a happier life w/ someone who appreciates him, who wouldn’t selfishly quit a job like an idiot during a pandemic, who can give him the type of life he deserves. I know he feels helpless and worried and concerned when I get sad like this and shut him out, but he doesn’t realize this is inside of my head ALL. THE. TIME and I’ve just gotten great at seeming functional? The dream is to now sell all of my shit, somehow gather the balls to break-up (if he doesn’t get smart first and dump me), and disappear off the grid till I find somewhere to off myself. This world is sick and all anyone seems to value is money and power. The current death rate of COVID in the US, and how our government continues to fail those most vulnerable, makes me physically ill. It feels doubly unfair for me to keep existing when ppl have life so much worse. I’m so tired of being a burden. I’m so tired of seeing the pain in this world and feeling like a huge mistake. TLDR; time to dump the only person that even makes my life worth living anymore so I can stop inadvertently dragging him down with me.
[ "selfharm" ]
[ "dump perfect bf and fall off the face of the earthI’ll try to keep this brief/to the point bc the details can’t possibly be that interesting to anyone aside from myself but I’m sleep deprived and rambly so sorry in advance.35 f, been w/wonderful and loving bf for 7 years and living together for 4 years.Spoiler alert: love doesn’t solve everything or fix your fucking head.Depressed since probably forever; first suicide attempt (total fail-got away without anyone knowing bc I was young & lucky) at 15.Had probably a nervous breakdown (wanted to die but chickened out) about 11 years ago, triggered by a bad break-up some months prior.Moved home briefly, basically started life all over again.Did a lot of DIY self-work to get where I am today.Have never been to a therapist or properly diagnosed, oops.I quit my job in September bc I couldn’t get out of bed anymore.I was crying nearly every day from stress and once remote work ended I had to be back in the office w/ asshole supervisor and was scared I’d freak-out in public.While it was a textbook toxic environment and I had the blessing of my bf, given the current situation in our world re:COVID-19 it wasn’t exactly the smartest choice.", "I was job hunting since May, and though I’d had zero luck/straight rejections, I somehow convinced myself this was the right time, that I would undoubtedly find a better opportunity and purpose.Thanks, broken brain.Now I’m back to feeling worthless after several failed interview and rejection cycles.I have about $200 left in my checking and I just want to give it away to charity bc it’s useless for me if I’m going to off myself soon.Today I cried all day and couldn’t get out of bed again.I have bad days and good days, but most of the time the desire to disappear is in the back of my mind.I honestly don’t know how I’ve gone this long pretending to be “normal.”Functioning enough to have relationships that are healthy, to maintain friendships (even though I’m the “bad friend,” ie the one who’s always cancelling and disappearing and bad at texting back.)To hold down jobs, when I’m able to get them.I just want my bf to have a better life than I am capable of providing.I love him immensely, but I know I’m going to slide further into this shitty place bc this is how my last breakdown started.", "I don’t think I can get another job right now to at least help w/ money either, and that’s so unfair, because he didn’t sign up to have a mentally ill AND financially unstable partner.I want him to have a happier life w/ someone who appreciates him, who wouldn’t selfishly quit a job like an idiot during a pandemic, who can give him the type of life he deserves.I know he feels helpless and worried and concerned when I get sad like this and shut him out, but he doesn’t realize this is inside of my head ALL.THE. TIMEand I’ve just gotten great at seeming functional?The dream is to now sell all of my shit, somehow gather the balls to break-up (if he doesn’t get smart first and dump me), and disappear off the grid till I find somewhere to off myself.This world is sick and all anyone seems to value is money and power.The current death rate of COVID in the US, and how our government continues to fail those most vulnerable, makes me physically ill.It feels doubly unfair for me to keep existing when ppl have life so much worse.I’m so tired of being a burden.I’m so tired of seeing the pain in this world and feeling like a huge mistake.", "TLDR; time to dump the only person that even makes my life worth living anymore so I can stop inadvertently dragging him down with me." ]
296
Desembarco perfecto y me caigo de la cara de la tierra.35 f, he sido w / maravilloso y amoroso bf durante 7 años y vivir juntos durante 4 años.Spoiler alerta: el amor no resuelve todo o arreglar su puta cabeza.Deprimido desde probablemente para siempre; primer intento de suicidio (total fracaso-se fue lejos sin que nadie supiera que bc era joven & afortunado) en 15.Habría probablemente un colapso nervioso (que quería morir pero se acobardó) hace unos 11 años, desencadenado por una mala ruptura algunos meses antes.Moved mi casa brevemente, básicamente comenzó la vida de nuevo.Hice mucho trabajo de bricolaje para llegar a donde estoy hoy.Nunca he estado en un terapeuta o adecuadamente diagnosticado, oops.I dio lugar a mi trabajo en septiembre bc que no podía salir de la cama más.Hice mucho trabajo de bricolaje para llegar a donde estoy hoy.
Emotional rollercoaster putting me at risk for impulsive suicideI am such a fucking insane person for the past couple months. Getting treatment next week but until then I am so miserable, I keep jumping from no hope and misery into some excitement for life and contentment. I get so low that if I had my suicide method readily available, I would be dead. With enough commitment to suicide, all it would take me is a few hours to have what I need to die, which hopefully is enough to outlast the climax of my negative emotions to die
[ "selfharm" ]
[ "Emotional rollercoaster putting me at risk for impulsive suicideI am such a fucking insane person for the past couple months.Getting treatment next week but until then I am so miserable, I keep jumping from no hope and misery into some excitement for life and contentment.I get so low that if I had my suicide method readily available, I would be dead.With enough commitment to suicide, all it would take me is a few hours to have what I need to die, which hopefully is enough to outlast the climax of my negative emotions to die" ]
115
La montaña rusa emocional me pone en riesgo de suicidio impulsivoSoy una maldita persona loca durante los últimos dos meses.Recibir tratamiento la próxima semana, pero hasta entonces soy tan miserable, sigo saltando de ninguna esperanza y miseria en alguna emoción por la vida y la satisfacción.Me pongo tan bajo que si tuviera mi método de suicidio fácilmente disponible, estaría muerto.Con suficiente compromiso con el suicidio, todo lo que me tomaría son unas horas para tener lo que necesito para morir, que con suerte es suficiente para durar el clímax de mis emociones negativas para morir
I dont know what to do anymore...I just wanna give up...
[ "selfharm" ]
[ "I dont know what to do anymore...I just wanna give up..." ]
15
Ya no sé qué hacer... Sólo quiero rendirme...
I’m not horny but I want to have sex (?) I don’t really know how else to describe it. Like I’m not really aroused, but I desire intimacy, if that makes sense.
[]
[ "I’m not horny but I want to have sex (?)I don’t really know how else to describe it.Like I’m not really aroused, but I desire intimacy, if that makes sense." ]
44
No estoy cachondo pero quiero tener sexo (?) Realmente no sé cómo describirlo. Como si no estuviera realmente excitado, pero deseo intimidad, si eso tiene sentido.
Lost everythingI had everything you could ask for this past year. I based my career on a rule and moved halfway across the country to do internationally impactful medical research. I was patient and took my time to make sure I was prepared for success. The problem is, a policy change made it nearly impossible for me to succeed. I spent four years of my life based on this policy and I was on my path towards becoming a doctor. I left everything to pursue this. I had a perfect career path, beautiful girlfriend, great reputation, and was on my way to completing all of my dreams. I was one step from success but I quit and now I have no chance of getting it back. I have 100,000 in debt, no job available, and I'm in an impossible situation. The rest of my cohort has gone on to medical school, and I'm 28 and stuck in my parents house settling. I had everything I wanted but I lost it. I moved halfway across the country with no research experience and ended up in a position where I was breeding rats for brain surgery and subsequently decapitating them. I went from an immensely happy individual with emergency services experience to a sociopath breeding and killing animals in the middle of nowhere. All for a paid masters degree that would have led me to medical school. My classmates projects entailed growing cells in petri dishes while I'm doing intense brain work with lab animals. I left everything to go back to school and this policy eliminated absolutely any chance of success. I'm so depressed and dysfunctional. I was a chubby kid growing up and had worked myself into a six-pack, great grades, and the world at my feet. All of that until someone changed a rule with no warning. I have constant thoughts of suicide. I was removed from my program for mental health and all that did was make it worse. I can't think anymore. I'm trapped in the past because my dreams were taken from me. I just wish there was something to blame. A sickness that took everything from me, or an accident. But its simply that a policy was changed and destroyed my career. I was the happiest asshole on the planet, now I'm so depressed I can't function. I lost my job, girlfriend, reputation, career, and I'm now in immense debt. I want to live, but I want my dreams back. I want my health back. I am in a program to complete a lesser version of my prior goals, but its settling for less and I'm so depressed that I can't think. My performance is great, but I'm so alone I can't focus. My depression makes no one want to be around me. Throughout my life, I've become bilingual, saved lives, built houses, and held just about every job looking for my purpose. I found my purpose and had it taken from me. I was in love with who I was. Now, because someone changed a rule, I can't function. I was in a master's program performing well until this rule was changed. I started having meltdowns and my mental health caused me to burn bridges. Ultimately led to suicidal thoughts that had me removed from the program. I hastily went to another program without seeking proper treatment and the new program is incredibly stressful. People are failing out left and right. Basically the hunger games version of academics. To put the cherry on the cake, there is a discrepancy on my application that could lead to rejection. I'm paranoid someone is out to fuck me over, I'm in debt, and I'm in a furnace of stress. I want out, and in today's world it seems like the only way out is suicide. The memories, the what-ifs, the what should-have-beens, are all destroying me. Its the first thing I think about when I wake up, and I cannot produce anything aside from ruminating. I'm dead inside and I feel like a joke. I had everything, and I lost it all. I had my career ruined by someone changing a rule. I'd love to go do something else, but 100,000 of debt doesn't really permit it. I have no emergency fund. I have multiple plans of suicide. I'm immensely ashamed of myself. I basically got fucked because I tried to be patient and it cost me everything. I'm a quitter now.
[ "selfharm" ]
[ "Lost everythingI had everything you could ask for this past year.I based my career on a rule and moved halfway across the country to do internationally impactful medical research.I was patient and took my time to make sure I was prepared for success.The problem is, a policy change made it nearly impossible for me to succeed.I spent four years of my life based on this policy and I was on my path towards becoming a doctor.I left everything to pursue this.I had a perfect career path, beautiful girlfriend, great reputation, and was on my way to completing all of my dreams.I was one step from success but I quit and now I have no chance of getting it back.I have 100,000 in debt, no job available, and I'm in an impossible situation.The rest of my cohort has gone on to medical school, and I'm 28 and stuck in my parents house settling.I had everything I wanted but I lost it.I moved halfway across the country with no research experience and ended up in a position where I was breeding rats for brain surgery and subsequently decapitating them.I went from an immensely happy individual with emergency services experience to a sociopath breeding and killing animals in the middle of nowhere.", "All for a paid masters degree that would have led me to medical school.My classmates projects entailed growing cells in petri dishes while I'm doing intense brain work with lab animals.I left everything to go back to school and this policy eliminated absolutely any chance of success.I'm so depressed and dysfunctional.I was a chubby kid growing up and had worked myself into a six-pack, great grades, and the world at my feet.All of that until someone changed a rule with no warning.I have constant thoughts of suicide.I was removed from my program for mental health and all that did was make it worse.I can't think anymore.I'm trapped in the past because my dreams were taken from me.I just wish there was something to blame.A sickness that took everything from me, or an accident.But its simply that a policy was changed and destroyed my career.I was the happiest asshole on the planet, now I'm so depressed I can't function.I lost my job, girlfriend, reputation, career, and I'm now in immense debt.I want to live, but I want my dreams back.I want my health back.I am in a program to complete a lesser version of my prior goals, but its settling for less and I'm so depressed that I can't think.", "My performance is great, but I'm so alone I can't focus.My depression makes no one want to be around me.Throughout my life, I've become bilingual, saved lives, built houses, and held just about every job looking for my purpose.I found my purpose and had it taken from me.I was in love with who I was.Now, because someone changed a rule, I can't function.I was in a master's program performing well until this rule was changed.I started having meltdowns and my mental health caused me to burn bridges.Ultimately led to suicidal thoughts that had me removed from the program.I hastily went to another program without seeking proper treatment and the new program is incredibly stressful.People are failing out left and right.Basically the hunger games version of academics.To put the cherry on the cake, there is a discrepancy on my application that could lead to rejection.I'm paranoid someone is out to fuck me over, I'm in debt, and I'm in a furnace of stress.I want out, and in today's world it seems like the only way out is suicide.The memories, the what-ifs, the what should-have-beens, are all destroying me.", "Its the first thing I think about when I wake up, and I cannot produce anything aside from ruminating.I'm dead insideand I feel like a joke.I had everything, and I lost it all.I had my career ruined by someone changing a rule.I'd love to go do something else, but 100,000 of debt doesn't really permit it.I have no emergency fund.I have multiple plans of suicide.I'm immensely ashamed of myself.I basically got fucked because I tried to be patient and it cost me everything.I'm a quitter now." ]
252
Perdí todo lo que podías pedir este año.Basé mi carrera en una regla y me mudé a medio camino a través del país para hacer una investigación médica de impacto internacional.Fui paciente y me tomé mi tiempo para asegurarme de que estaba preparada para el éxito.El problema es que un cambio de política me hizo casi imposible tener éxito.Pasé cuatro años de mi vida basado en esta política y estaba en mi camino para convertirme en médico.Dejé todo para seguir este camino.Tuve una trayectoria profesional perfecta, una novia hermosa, una gran reputación, y estaba en camino de completar todos mis sueños.Yo estaba a un paso del éxito, pero lo dejé y ahora no tengo ninguna posibilidad de recuperarlo.Tengo 100.000 deudas, ningún trabajo disponible, y estoy en una situación imposible.El resto de mi cohorte ha ido a la escuela de medicina, y tengo 28 años y me quedé en la casa de mis padres asentándose.Tenía todo lo que quería, pero lo perdí.Me mudé a medio camino a través del país sin experiencia de investigación y terminé en una posición en la que estaba criando ratas para la cirugía cerebral y posteriormente las despiré.
Signed a DNR form, burned and threw out most of my things.Today I had an epiphany threw out all of my notes, 130+scientific & mathematical books, and 90% of my personal belongings. The meds don’t help, the “therapy” is patronizing. Onward, I ask myself why I ever chose the field of science. I thought it was about giving. I thought it was about trying to find a team to discuss real problems on a level that each member was infinitely obsessed and driven. Academia is worried about their tenure. Principal investigators won’t hire, trying to get rich off fluorescing fish to guide them in the dark. I’m in $200,000 loan debt and I still live with my parents in a bad neighborhood. All is well. They don’t believe in depression and what facilitates anxiety. I have nothing to live for now. I know the texture of rejection of too many things so intimately. Death do us part has been an attractive choice. No one ever tells you that you can work hard and be worth nothing in the end. I missed that seminar. My mentor is dead from cancer. I lived for and through him—he helped to implement resilience. I barely saw him, yet he knew the real me. I regret not pushing for reasons to see him more. Can’t get a job, which means no life companionship either. Wait, wait it gets better! Even still, I couldn’t even ‘pretend’ to be with someone who I don’t care about, because depressed people certainly cannot have relationships nor do they deserve to apparently. I have to wait until I’m cured of major depression to pursue any such things. Fact is, this hideous mental leprosy is largely aphysical, yet, it affects mass outside of the body. I’ve never cried so much until today at how profoundly real this is. This world has problems, and I wanted give something truly good that the last person who believed in me said I could do. I don’t care about ‘what he would want me to do.’ I don’t care about the illusion of my own happiness, to hell with its broken statuary in eggshell-white, blinding delusion. It’s all rhetoric. I’ve lived half of my life. I’m 22 and haven’t done a thing. It seems like yesterday that I was 5, pondering the complexity of ant patterns. I was supposed to create something by now, but I’ve watched Zuckerberg and pals live out his ‘dream.’ So ghost the torturer o’creative thinking. The brute contingency to be ostracized, trying to design new, truly innovative works and technology...the abuse as a child for this very same reason. That if I can’t give—then I don’t deserve the likes of ever knowing the works of people like Newton to Darwin. I was that beloved book. Obscure, with a vision if only I’d get the chance. A fair shot at something or a friend who intuitively knew. I have no friends. The one’s I thought I had just tell me, “I don’t know what to say.” I really f*cking hate that line. So then, I watched my Principia burn—its charred flesh, the hickory-smoked reminder, the gaseous taste of a poignant, failed, ironic evolutionary splendor. I’d never expect anyone to understand me, but I’ll leave what little I can afford to. I’m going out for a long walk; my socks soaked with near insanity. Squishing sounds dispelling the myth that anything had meaning, regardless of footprints to prove that I’d been there too. The kicker? My birth was an accident. I’m alive because I am, not because someone planned for my existence with good intention.
[ "selfharm" ]
[ "Signed a DNR form, burned and threw out most of my things.Today I had an epiphany threw out all of my notes, 130+scientific & mathematical books, and 90% of my personal belongings.The meds don’t help, the “therapy” is patronizing.Onward, I ask myself why I ever chose the field of science.I thought it was about giving.I thought it was about trying to find a team to discuss real problems on a level that each member was infinitely obsessed and driven.Academia is worried about their tenure.Principal investigators won’t hire, trying to get rich off fluorescing fish to guide them in the dark.I’m in $200,000 loan debt and I still live with my parents in a bad neighborhood.All is well.They don’t believe in depression and what facilitates anxiety.I have nothing to live for now.I know the texture of rejection of too many things so intimately.Death do us part has been an attractive choice.No one ever tells you that you can work hard and be worth nothing in the end.I missed that seminar.My mentor is dead from cancer.I lived for and through him—he helped to implement resilience.I barely saw him, yet he knew the real me.I regret not pushing for reasons to see him more.", "Can’t get a job, which means no life companionship either.Wait, wait it gets better!Even still, I couldn’t even ‘pretend’ to be with someone who I don’t care about, because depressed people certainly cannot have relationships nor do they deserve to apparently.I have to wait until I’m cured of major depression to pursue any such things.Fact is, this hideous mental leprosy is largely aphysical, yet, it affects mass outside of the body.I’ve never cried so much until today at how profoundly real this is.This world has problems, and I wanted give something truly good that the last person who believed in me said I could do.I don’t care about ‘what he would want me to do.’I don’t care about the illusion of my own happiness, to hell with its broken statuary in eggshell-white, blinding delusion.It’s all rhetoric.I’ve lived half of my life.I’m 22 and haven’t done a thing.It seems like yesterday that I was 5, pondering the complexity of ant patterns.I was supposed to create something by now, but I’ve watched Zuckerberg and pals live out his ‘dream.’So ghost the torturer o’creative thinking.", "The brute contingency to be ostracized, trying to design new, truly innovative works and technology...the abuse as a child for this very same reason.That if I can’t give—then I don’t deserve the likes of ever knowing the works of people like Newton to Darwin.I was that beloved book.Obscure, with a vision if only I’d get the chance.A fair shot at something or a friend who intuitively knew.I have no friends.The one’s I thought I had just tell me, “I don’t know what to say.”I really f*cking hate that line.So then, I watched my Principia burn—its charred flesh, the hickory-smoked reminder, the gaseous taste of a poignant, failed, ironic evolutionary splendor.I’d never expect anyone to understand me, but I’ll leave what little I can afford to.I’m going out for a long walk; my socks soaked with near insanity.Squishing sounds dispelling the myth that anything had meaning, regardless of footprints to prove that I’d been there too.The kicker?My birth was an accident.I’m alive because I am, not because someone planned for my existence with good intention." ]
282
Firmado un formulario DNR, quemado y arrojado la mayoría de mis cosas.Hoy tuve una epifanía tiró todas mis notas, 130 & libros matemáticos científicos, y 90% de mis pertenencias personales.Los medicamentos no ayudan, la “terapia” es condescendiente.En adelante, me pregunto por qué he elegido el campo de la ciencia.Pensé que se trataba de dar.Pensé que se trataba de tratar de encontrar un equipo para discutir problemas reales en un nivel que cada miembro estaba infinitamente obsesionado y impulsado.Academia está preocupada por su mandato.Los investigadores principales no contratarán, tratando de obtener ricos de fluorescencia peces para guiarlos en la oscuridad.Estoy en deuda de préstamo de 200.000 dólares y todavía vivo con mis padres en un barrio malo.Todo está bien.No creen en la depresión y lo que facilita la ansiedad.No tengo nada que vivir por ahora.Conozco la textura del rechazo de demasiadas cosas tan íntimamente.
I don't know what I am doing with my life [https://skribbl.io/?cumODdXSQAiT](https://skribbl.io/?cumODdXSQAiT)
[]
[ "I don't know what I am doing with my life [https://skribbl.io/?cumODdXSQAiT](https://skribbl.io/?cumODdXSQAiT)" ]
56
No sé qué estoy haciendo con mi vida [https://skribbl.io/?cumODdXSQAiT](https://skribbl.io/?cumODdXSQAiT)
Important information from serial killer documentary I am watching Porn historians exist apparently. Whether being a porn historian is a job you can get money for was not cleared, but 'Porn Historian' is a title a person can have.
[]
[ "Important information from serial killer documentary I am watching Porn historians exist apparently.Whether being a porn historian is a job you can get money for was not cleared, but 'Porn Historian' is a title a person can have." ]
51
Información importante del documental de asesino en serie que estoy viendo historiadores porno existen aparentemente.Ya sea un historiador del porno es un trabajo para el que usted puede conseguir dinero no fue limpiado, pero 'Porn Historian' es un título que una persona puede tener.
Why keep treading water? I want to drownI’ve come to terms with my fate, every single day I have to struggle agonizingly just to appear normal for the outside world. It’s an endless loop of pain and I want the game over screen.
[ "selfharm" ]
[ "Why keep treading water?I want to drownI’ve come to terms with my fate, every single day I have to struggle agonizingly just to appear normal for the outside world.It’s an endless loop of pain and I want the game over screen." ]
56
¿Por qué seguir pisando el agua?Quiero ahogarmeHe llegado a un acuerdo con mi destino, cada día tengo que luchar agonizantemente sólo para parecer normal para el mundo exterior.Es un bucle sin fin de dolor y quiero el juego sobre la pantalla.
I feel like I've spiraled down so far that I'm getting near manic.I had a pretty awful night last night and today at work the pressure has been compounding pretty bad. I'm damn near a breaking point. It's getting real bad, and I'm not exaggerating, it's really really really bad. I didn't think it could get this much worse after the absolute lows I've experienced. It's a complete wonder how I'm still standing here functioning somehow. I feel dazed with stress. I feel like I'm walking around in a dream right now.
[ "selfharm" ]
[ "I feel like I've spiraled down so far that I'm getting near manic.I had a pretty awful night last night and today at work the pressure has been compounding pretty bad.I'm damn near a breaking point.It's getting real bad, and I'm not exaggerating, it's really really really bad.I didn't think it could get this much worse after the absolute lows I've experienced.It's a complete wonder how I'm still standing here functioning somehow.I feel dazed with stress.I feel like I'm walking around in a dream right now." ]
133
Siento que he bajado en espiral hasta ahora que me estoy acercando a lo maníaco.Tuve una noche bastante horrible anoche y hoy en el trabajo la presión se ha estado agravando bastante mal.Estoy malditamente cerca de un punto de ruptura.Se está poniendo muy mal, y no estoy exagerando, es realmente realmente muy malo.No pensé que podría empeorar mucho después de los mínimos absolutos que he experimentado.Es una maravilla completa cómo todavía estoy aquí funcionando de alguna manera.Me siento aturdido por el estrés.Me siento como si estuviera caminando en un sueño en este momento.
I’m a sexually frustrated 20 almost 21 year old and it’s actually killing meI’m lonely I crave sex so badly that I can’t actually get it and I know I’ll never have it I just hate myself so much that I can’t even stand to look at myself I just wish I was desirable at all but tonight I’ll just get drunk and hopefully gain the courage to suffocate myself because I honestly don’t deserve life
[ "selfharm" ]
[ "I’m a sexually frustrated 20 almost 21 year old and it’s actually killing meI’m lonely I crave sex so badly that I can’t actually get itand I know I’ll never have itI just hate myself so much that I can’t even stand to look at myself I just wish I was desirable at allbut tonight I’ll just get drunk and hopefully gain the courage to suffocate myself because I honestly don’t deserve life" ]
97
Soy un sexualmente frustrado 20 casi 21 años de edad y en realidad me está matando Estoy solo Ansío tanto el sexo que realmente no puedo conseguirlo y sé que nunca lo tendré Sólo me odio tanto que ni siquiera puedo soportar mirarme a mí mismo Sólo deseo ser deseable en todo, pero esta noche me emborracharé y espero ganar el valor para sofocarme porque honestamente no me merezco la vida
I’ve packed my camelback with drugs to kill myself with. I have a duffel bag with two beers, sparklers, and just anything else I might need tonight. I’m going to hike to my off trail spot and post up my hammock, and I’m going to die tonight.3k in credit card debt. Found out I have a student loan I didn’t fucking know about. I work a shitty part time job now after getting laid off a full time job last year, since then fell into a shitty pyramid scheme and accumulated the debt because I couldn’t stand asking my parents for help. The guy I fell in love with won’t love me back because I’m transgender, and fuck it I’m done with his shit. My friends only care now because they’re scared of losing me. I give and give and give myself And this is what I am A worthless person. I’ve disappointed my parents. I can’t do shit right. My little brother is fucking married in a house with a dog and a solid life, and what do I have? I pour shitty Frappuccinos for unappreciative assholes for 9 dollars an hour. I’m behind on rent. I’m barely surfing. This life is just meant to fuck us over and I’m fucking done. I’m fucking done and I’m terrified.
[ "selfharm" ]
[ "I’ve packed my camelback with drugs to kill myself with.I have a duffel bag with two beers, sparklers, and just anything else I might need tonight.I’m going to hike to my off trail spot and post up my hammock, and I’m going to die tonight.3k in credit card debt.Found out I have a student loan I didn’t fucking know about.I work a shitty part time job now after getting laid off a full time job last year, since then fell into a shitty pyramid scheme and accumulated the debt because I couldn’t stand asking my parents for help.The guy I fell in love with won’t love me back because I’m transgender, and fuck it I’m done with his shit.My friends only care now because they’re scared of losing me.I give and give and give myselfAnd this is what I am\nA worthless person.I’ve disappointed my parents.I can’t do shit right.My little brother is fucking married in a house with a dog and a solid life, and what do I have?I pour shitty Frappuccinos for unappreciative assholes for 9 dollars an hour.I’m behind on rent.I’m barely surfing.This life is just meant to fuck us over and I’m fucking done.I’m fucking done and I’m terrified." ]
294
Tengo una bolsa de lona con dos cervezas, chispas, y cualquier otra cosa que pueda necesitar esta noche.Voy a caminar a mi lugar fuera del sendero y a poner mi hamaca, y voy a morir esta noche.3k en deuda de tarjeta de crédito.Me encontré con un préstamo de estudiante que no sabía.Trabajo un trabajo de medio tiempo de mierda ahora después de que me despidieron de un trabajo de tiempo completo el año pasado, desde entonces caí en un esquema de pirámide de mierda y acumulé la deuda porque no podía soportar pedir ayuda a mis padres.El tipo con el que me enamoré no me amará de nuevo porque soy transgénero, y a la mierda lo he hecho con su mierda.A mis amigos solo les importa ahora porque tienen miedo de perderme.Me doy y doy y me doy a mí mismoY esto es lo que soy una persona inútil.He decepcionado a mis padres.No puedo hacer mierda.Mi hermanito se está casando en una casa con un perro y una vida sólida.
I have no future.The only reason I haven't killed myself is because it would crush my mom. My brother is mentally handicapped and wouldn't understand. I feel selfish for wanting to die but I don't know how long that will hold me back. I'll probably just end up convincing myself that they'd be better off without me anyway and do myself in. I'm scared. I'm just so scared.
[ "selfharm" ]
[ "I have no future.The only reason I haven't killed myself is because it would crush my mom.My brother is mentally handicapped and wouldn't understand.I feel selfish for wanting to die but I don't know how long that will hold me back.I'll probably just end up convincing myself that they'd be better off without me anyway and do myself in.I'm scared.I'm just so scared." ]
90
No tengo futuro.La única razón por la que no me he matado es porque aplastaría a mi mamá.Mi hermano es mentalmente discapacitado y no lo entendería.Me siento egoísta por querer morir, pero no sé cuánto tiempo me detendrá.Probablemente terminaré convenciéndome de que estarían mejor sin mí de todos modos y me haría entrar.Tengo miedo.Estoy tan asustada.
I just lost my whole future and just don't see the point in anything anymore...I'm 18, started the second half of my senior year not too long ago. Got into every college I applied to including my dream school, had plans for what I'd do once I got there, but my family can't afford to send me to any of them. The main source of the money we would've used to pay for it fell through the cracks, so we have virtually nothing to pay my tuition. Financial aid is offering me little money, applied for only a few scholarships because I thought we were financially secure enough that it wasn't worth my time. I'm not a super genius, but still fairly smart. 3.8 GPA, top 5% of class, very talented artist and even got into two of the best art schools in the country. But for what? What's the point if I can't do anything with it, if I'll be stuck living as a bum in this godforsaken town? No job, no car (thanks a lot, driving phobia), and no sense of fulfillment waiting for me if I'm stuck here while all my friends move on to bigger and better things. Even if we somehow pile up enough money for me to get out, what about my younger bro? He will most likely want to go to college too in a few years, and there won't be any money left for him and he'll be in an even worse boat than me. I know there's other options, other routes I could take with my future, but none of them would be even remotely fulfilling to me. There's no point in anything, nothing to keep dragging myself through another five months or more of hell for. My parents hate each other and are eventually getting a divorce. A huge part of why we couldn't get the money is kind of my dad's fault so my mom hates him even more now, and all they do now is argue over my future. I can't go anywhere or do anything with friends anymore because I'm scared to leave the house. Got into two huge fights with my dad the other day, not sure if it was worth it. Feels like I can't trust either of them anymore. Scratch that, feels like I can't trust hardly *anyone* anymore. I don't want to end it. There's too many people who care about me, too many people who I'd hurt if I left them behind. My friends, my parents, my little brother, my boyfriend, even my cats. I couldn't hurt them like that. Life is too valuable, so I couldn't imagine ever actually going through with anything. But soon, I feel like there's going to be nowhere else for me to go and if I keep going on like this I'll just drag everyone down. I've had issues with depression in the past, but this is a whole new level of down and I'm terrified of where I'll end up.
[ "selfharm" ]
[ "I just lost my whole future and just don't see the point in anything anymore...I'm 18, started the second half of my senior year not too long ago.Got into every college I applied to including my dream school, had plans for what I'd do once I got there, but my family can't afford to send me to any of them.The main source of the money we would've used to pay for it fell through the cracks, so we have virtually nothing to pay my tuition.Financial aid is offering me little money, applied for only a few scholarships because I thought we were financially secure enough that it wasn't worth my time.I'm not a super genius, but still fairly smart.3.8 GPA, top 5% of class, very talented artist and even got into two of the best art schools in the country.But for what?What's the point if I can't do anything with it, if I'll be stuck living as a bum in this godforsaken town?No job, no car (thanks a lot, driving phobia), and no sense of fulfillment waiting for me if I'm stuck here while all my friends move on to bigger and better things.Even if we somehow pile up enough money for me to get out, what about my younger bro?", "He will most likely want to go to college too in a few years, and there won't be any money left for him and he'll be in an even worse boat than me.I know there's other options, other routes I could take with my future, but none of them would be even remotely fulfilling to me.There's no point in anything, nothing to keep dragging myself through another five months or more of hell for.My parents hate each other and are eventually getting a divorce.A huge part of why we couldn't get the money is kind of my dad's fault so my mom hates him even more now, and all they do now is argue over my future.I can't go anywhere or do anything with friends anymore because I'm scared to leave the house.Got into two huge fights with my dad the other day, not sure if it was worth it.Feels like I can't trust either of them anymore.Scratch that, feels like I can't trust hardly *anyone* anymore.I don't want to end it.There's too many people who care about me, too many people who I'd hurt if I left them behind.My friends, my parents, my little brother, my boyfriend, even my cats.I couldn't hurt them like that.Life is too valuable, so I couldn't imagine ever actually going through with anything.", "But soon, I feel like there's going to be nowhere else for me to go and if I keep going on like this I'll just drag everyone down.I've had issues with depression in the past, but this is a whole new level of downand I'm terrified of where I'll end up." ]
277
Simplemente perdí todo mi futuro y ya no veo el punto en nada...Tengo 18 años, empecé la segunda mitad de mi último año no hace mucho tiempo.En todas las universidades que solicité incluir mi escuela de ensueño, tenía planes para lo que haría una vez que llegué allí, pero mi familia no puede permitirse el lujo de enviarme a ninguna de ellas.La principal fuente del dinero que habríamos utilizado para pagarlo cayó a través de las grietas, así que no tenemos prácticamente nada para pagar mi matrícula.La ayuda financiera es ofrecerme poco dinero, aplicarme sólo unas pocas becas porque pensé que estábamos lo suficientemente seguros como para que no valiera la pena mi tiempo.No soy un súper genio, pero todavía bastante inteligente.3.8 GPA, el 5% superior de la clase, artista muy talentoso e incluso se metió en dos de las mejores escuelas de arte del país.¿Pero para qué? ¿Para qué?, y no tengo sentido de cumplir nada con ello, si me quedaremos viviendo como un vagabundo en esta ciudad de dioses?
Females of this sub I have a question for you Now we all know that every single one of us is a virgin loser but if you had the choice would you rather have a bf with a big ol schlongdongler or a fat’ol ass, I’m asking because I’m bored and lonely
[]
[ "Females of this sub I have a question for you Now we all know that every single one of us is a virgin loser but if you had the choice would you rather have a bf with a big ol schlongdongler or a fat’ol ass, I’m asking because I’m bored and lonely" ]
66
Las hembras de este submarino tengo una pregunta para usted Ahora todos sabemos que cada uno de nosotros es un perdedor virgen, pero si tuviera la opción ¿preferiría tener un BF con un gran ol schlongdongler o un culo gordo, Estoy preguntando porque estoy aburrido y solitario
What noise does a russian make when they hit the ground hard? S’blyat
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[ "What noise does a russian make when they hit the ground hard?S’blyat" ]
19
¿Qué ruido hace un ruso cuando golpean el suelo con fuerza?
This is the happiest day of my life Today I dressed quite nicer than I usually do since it was my first day back to face to face school, and since school started I lost a tad bit of weight, and a girl texted me and told me I looked cute today.
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[ "This is the happiest day of my life Today I dressed quite nicer than I usually do since it was my first day back to face to face school, and since school started I lost a tad bit of weight, and a girl texted me and told me I looked cute today." ]
60
Este es el día más feliz de mi vida Hoy me vestí bastante mejor de lo que suelo hacer ya que era mi primer día de vuelta a la escuela cara a cara, y desde que comenzó la escuela perdí un poco de peso, y una chica me envió un mensaje de texto y me dijo que me veía lindo hoy.
I need to vent to someoneSuicide hotlines just jump straight to problem solving and what I really want to do is talk and have someone really hear me
[ "selfharm" ]
[ "I need to vent to someoneSuicide hotlines just jump straight to problem solving and what I really want to do is talk and have someone really hear me" ]
32
Necesito desahogarme a alguien. Las líneas directas de suicidio sólo saltan directamente a la solución de problemas y lo que realmente quiero hacer es hablar y hacer que alguien realmente me escuche.
Feel the music We're no strangers to love You know the rules and so do I A full commitment's what I'm thinking of You wouldn't get this from any other guy I just wanna tell you how I'm feeling Gotta make you understand Never gonna give you up Never gonna let you down Never gonna run around and desert you Never gonna make you cry Never gonna say goodbye Never gonna tell a lie and hurt you We've known each other for so long Your heart's been aching but you're too shy to say it Inside we both know what's been going on We know the game and we're gonna play it And if you ask me how I'm feeling Don't tell me you're too blind to see Never gonna give you up Never gonna let you down Never gonna run around and desert you Never gonna make you cry Never gonna say goodbye Never gonna tell a…
[]
[ "Feel the music We're no strangers to love\nYou know the rules and so do I\nA full commitment's what I'm thinking of\nYou wouldn't get this from any other guy\n\nI just wanna tell you how I'm feeling\nGotta make you understand\n\nNever gonna give you up\nNever gonna let you down\nNever gonna run around and desert you\nNever gonna make you cry\nNever gonna say goodbye\nNever gonna tell a lie and hurt you\n\nWe've known each other for so long\nYour heart's been aching but you're too shy to say it\nInside we both know what's been going on\nWe know the game and we're gonna play itAnd if you ask me how I'm feeling\nDon't tell me you're too blind to see\n\nNever gonna give you up\nNever gonna let you down\nNever gonna run around and desert you\nNever gonna make you cry\nNever gonna say goodbye\nNever gonna tell a…" ]
186
Siente la música No somos extraños a amar Conoces las reglas y yo también Un compromiso total es lo que estoy pensando No conseguirías esto de cualquier otro tipo Sólo quiero decirte cómo me siento Tengo que hacerte entender Nunca te vas a rendir Nunca vas a abandonar Nunca vas a correr y abandonar Nunca vas a hacer llorar Nunca vas a decir adiós Nunca vas a decir una mentira y hacerte daño Nos conocemos desde hace tanto tiempo Tu corazón ha estado dolorido pero eres demasiado tímido para decirlo Dentro de nosotros ambos sabemos lo que ha estado pasando Conocemos el juego y vamos a jugarlo Y si me preguntas cómo me siento No me digas que eres demasiado ciego para verte Nunca vas a dejarte caer Nunca vas a correr y desertar Nunca vas a hacerte llorar Nunca vas a decir adiós Nunca vas a decir un...
Five reasonsSomeone give me five reasons not to do it. I have no futer. I have almost no friends. My family is disfunctional and prettymuch hates me. Ive been having these thoughts for years and if anything theyve gotten worse. I try to distract myself from them with video games and shit, but that doesnt always work and is making the situation with the parentals worse. And a final note, i am not accepting chliche as fuck stuff like "things will get better" or "youre stronger than this" or "God loves you" (atheist btw)
[ "selfharm" ]
[ "Five reasonsSomeone give me five reasons not to do it.I have no futer.I have almost no friends.My family is disfunctional and prettymuch hates me.Ive been having these thoughts for years and if anything theyve gotten worse.I try to distract myself from them with video games and shit, but that doesnt always work and is making the situation with the parentals worse.And a final note, i am not accepting chliche as fuck stuff like \"things will get better\" or \"youre stronger than this\" or \"God loves you\" (atheist btw)" ]
129
Cinco razonesAlguien me da cinco razones para no hacerlo.No tengo ningún futer.No tengo casi ningún amigo.Mi familia está infuncional y bastante me odia.He estado teniendo estos pensamientos durante años y si algo se ha puesto peor.Trato de distraerme de ellos con videojuegos y mierda, pero eso no siempre funciona y está empeorando la situación con los padres.Y una nota final, no estoy aceptando chliche como cosas de mierda como "las cosas se pondrán mejor" o "tú eres más fuerte que esto" o "Dios te ama" (atheist btw)
I have a wholesome comment something that’s not wholesome and u will get the award it only applies to the first not wholesome comment
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[ "I have a wholesome comment something that’s not wholesome and u will get the award it only applies to the first not wholesome comment" ]
29
Tengo un comentario sano algo que no es sano y usted recibirá el premio que sólo se aplica al primer comentario no saludable
SUICIDE CONTEMPLATIONguys i need some suggestion of depressing ways to kms. Answer me your ideas. The most painful and longest one will be appreciated
[ "selfharm" ]
[ "SUICIDE CONTEMPLATIONguys i need some suggestion of depressing ways to kms.Answer me your ideas.The most painful and longest one will be appreciated" ]
38
Necesito algunas sugerencias de formas deprimentes a kms.Respóndeme tus ideas.La más dolorosa y la más larga será apreciada
I am just killing time.Jumping off a 10 stories building or a shot gun, those are the only two ways I have come up when I think of some "safe" ways to do it. How long I have had these thoughts in my mind? Probably for about a year or so... It does not matter, these thoughts do not go away. I am quickly running out of money and will. Death is the great healer... it solves everything in a moment. Problem is, I am dead already. And I say this mantra to myself every night to fall asleep: "you don't exist". Yes, of course I got this from Radiohead’s: "The easiest way to sleep at night, is to carry on believing that I don't exist"... It does help, at least it does for me. After 7-8 h of good sleep I wake up to this reality: a reality of broken dreams. Or more precisely, a reality where I don’t have dreams any more. A reality where passion and commitment simply have been extinguished from my soul. I am a dead person, with no heart, with no dreams. I don't live, I am just killing time.
[ "selfharm" ]
[ "I am just killing time.Jumping off a 10 stories building or a shot gun, those are the only two ways I have come up when I think of some \"safe\" ways to do it.How long I have had these thoughts in my mind?Probably for about a year or so...It does not matter, these thoughts do not go away.I am quickly running out of money and will.Death is the great healer...it solves everything in a moment.Problem is, I am dead already.And I say this mantra to myself every night to fall asleep: \"you don't exist\".Yes, of course I got this from Radiohead’s: \"The easiest way to sleep at night, is to carry on believing that I don't exist\"...It does help, at least it does for me.After 7-8 h of good sleep I wake up to this reality: a reality of broken dreams.Or more precisely, a reality where I don’t have dreams any more.A reality where passion and commitment simply have been extinguished from my soul.I am a dead person, with no heart, with no dreams.I don't live, I am just killing time." ]
257
Sólo estoy matando el tiempo.¿Cuánto tiempo he tenido estos pensamientos en mi mente?Probablemente durante un año o así...No importa, estos pensamientos no se van.Estoy corriendo rápidamente de dinero y voluntad.La muerte es el gran sanador...lo resuelve todo en un momento.El problema es, ya estoy muerto.Y digo este mantra a mí mismo cada noche para quedarme dormido: "tú no existes".Sí, por supuesto, lo conseguí de Radiohead: "La manera más fácil de dormir por la noche, es seguir creyendo que no existo"...Me ayuda, al menos lo hace para mí.Después de 7-8 h de buen sueño me despierto a esta realidad: una realidad de sueños rotos.O, más precisamente, una realidad donde no tengo sueños más.Una realidad donde la pasión y el compromiso simplemente se han extinguido de mi alma.
Its 12:00 am and i got school tomorrow, but I just finished a 7000 word english assessment due tomorrow I had all year to do, but only started yesterday evening. I may be the king of procrastinators, but can I get a “i’m proud of you Aaron” in the chat before I go to sleep?
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[ "Its 12:00 amand i got school tomorrow, but I just finished a 7000 word english assessment due tomorrow I had all year to do, but only started yesterday evening.I may be the king of procrastinators, but can I get a “i’m proud of you Aaron” in the chat before I go to sleep?" ]
68
Son las 12:00 am y tengo escuela mañana, pero acabo de terminar una evaluación de 7000 palabras en inglés debido mañana que tenía todo el año para hacer, pero sólo comenzó ayer por la noche.Puede que sea el rey de los procrastinadores, pero ¿puedo obtener un “estoy orgulloso de ti Aaron” en la charla antes de irme a dormir?
I wish I was deadBut I just keep fucking going. I don't know why. Maybe because the alternative is literally nothing. Emptiness.
[ "selfharm" ]
[ "I wish I was deadBut I just keep fucking going.I don't know why.Maybe because the alternative is literally nothing.Emptiness." ]
32
Ojalá estuviera muerto, pero sigo.No sé por qué.Tal vez porque la alternativa es literalmente nada.Vacuidad.
Why do I feel this way?I have aspersions, a family, I’m well off, I’m healthy, I have a decent job but I feel like so hopeless and terribly sad. I contemplate suicide weekly. Why does just living hurt so much?
[ "selfharm" ]
[ "Why do I feel this way?I have aspersions, a family, I’m well off, I’m healthy, I have a decent job but I feel like so hopeless and terribly sad.I contemplate suicide weekly.Why does just living hurt so much?" ]
55
¿Por qué me siento así?Tengo aspersiones, una familia, estoy bien, estoy sano, tengo un trabajo decente, pero me siento tan desesperada y terriblemente triste.Contemplaré el suicidio semanalmente.¿Por qué vivir duele tanto?
Why isnt there an answer for people who don't have any family?I don't see the point of life If I don't have a loving family. I want loving people but it doesn't feel the same if they are not family. All my family is either dead or alienated and it's difficult to get in touch with them or have a good relationship with them. Obviously since I can't choose my family, bring my dead family members back, make my living relatives who I want them to be, or make new ones the solution is suicide.
[ "selfharm" ]
[ "Why isnt there an answer for people who don't have any family?I don't see the point of life If I don't have a loving family.I want loving people but it doesn't feel the same if they are not family.All my family is either dead or alienated and it's difficult to get in touch with them or have a good relationship with them.Obviously since I can't choose my family, bring my dead family members back, make my living relatives who I want them to be, or make new ones the solution is suicide." ]
121
¿Por qué no hay una respuesta para las personas que no tienen ninguna familia?No veo el punto de la vida Si no tengo una familia amorosa.Quiero personas amorosas pero no se siente lo mismo si no son familiares.Toda mi familia está muerta o alienada y es difícil ponerse en contacto con ellos o tener una buena relación con ellos.Obviamente ya que no puedo elegir a mi familia, traer a mis familiares muertos de vuelta, hacer que mis parientes vivos que quiero que sean, o hacer otros nuevos la solución es el suicidio.
Trying to find some direction, but still feeling trapped.(This post is gonna be kind of a mess since I'm going pretty back and forth with it adding and changing parts as I go along. Sorry if it makes no sense.) I had a long talk with my mum this evening, during which I almost told her that I'm suicidal. I kind of wanted to, she has always been supportive and has known where to look to get help, if she was unable to help by herself. I did manage to tell her about the breakdown I had at work over the summer, and how things have gotten worse since I lost two huge sources of support in my life (my girlfriend and therapy). I did tell her that I've been having some pretty dark thoughts but couldn't help but shy away from the extent of those thoughts. I've been researching for weeks how to do it quickly and with as little discomfort as possible, and ways to increase my chances of success. I want her to know and I think I need her to know, but I'm scared. All the while I'm thinking about this, I'm still worrying about work. I put so much pressure on myself because my workplace is short-staffed as it is and I feel guilty about putting my coworkers in a more difficult situation. I saw a doctor today who offered to sign me off for a few weeks to get myself back in therapy and to give my new meds a chance to get into my system and hopefully alleviate some of the side effects, which I declined in favour of a note saying to reduce my hours instead of taking me off entirely. I just really don't know what to do, where to go from here. I'm trying to make a start on recovery but it's so difficult and I'm a little afraid of the fact that somewhere in the back of my mind, I know I have another option. No less difficult, but faster and guarantees that I'll never hurt like this again.
[ "selfharm" ]
[ "Trying to find some direction, but still feeling trapped.(This post is gonna be kind of a mess since I'm going pretty back and forth with it adding and changing parts as I go along.Sorry if it makes no sense.)I had a long talk with my mum this evening, during which I almost told her that I'm suicidal.I kind of wanted to, she has always been supportive and has known where to look to get help, if she was unable to help by herself.I did manage to tell her about the breakdown I had at work over the summer, and how things have gotten worse since I lost two huge sources of support in my life (my girlfriend and therapy).I did tell her that I've been having some pretty dark thoughts but couldn't help but shy away from the extent of those thoughts.I've been researching for weeks how to do it quickly and with as little discomfort as possible, and ways to increase my chances of success.I want her to knowand I think I need her to know, but I'm scared.All the while I'm thinking about this, I'm still worrying about work.I put so much pressure on myself because my workplace is short-staffed as it is and I feel guilty about putting my coworkers in a more difficult situation.", "I saw a doctor today who offered to sign me off for a few weeks to get myself back in therapy and to give my new meds a chance to get into my system and hopefully alleviate some of the side effects, which I declined in favour of a note saying to reduce my hours instead of taking me off entirely.I just really don't know what to do, where to go from here.I'm trying to make a start on recovery but it's so difficultand I'm a little afraid of the fact that somewhere in the back of my mind, I know I have another option.No less difficult, but faster and guarantees that I'll never hurt like this again." ]
273
Tratando de encontrar alguna dirección, pero todavía sintiéndome atrapado.(Este post va a ser una especie de desastre ya que voy bastante de ida y vuelta con ella agregando y cambiando partes a medida que voy.Lo siento si no tiene sentido.)He tenido una larga charla con mi madre esta noche, durante la cual casi le dije que soy suicida.Yo tipo de quería, ella siempre ha sido de apoyo y ha sabido buscar ayuda, si ella no podía ayudar por sí misma.Logré contarle acerca de la crisis que tuve en el trabajo durante el verano, y cómo las cosas han empeorado desde que perdí dos grandes fuentes de apoyo en mi vida (mi novia y terapia).Yo le dije que he estado teniendo algunos pensamientos bastante oscuros pero no podía sino evitar alejarme de la extensión de esos pensamientos.He estado investigando durante semanas cómo hacerlo rápidamente y con la menor molestia posible, y maneras de aumentar mis posibilidades de éxito.Quiero que ella sepa y creo que necesito saber, pero estoy asustado.
So I just realized I have no friends All my life ive been a loner but as I progress in life I am beginning to realize that a truly have no friends. No one hits up my DMs or anything. I don't think I'm a boring person but every time I talk to someone they just walk away. Is there anything I can do to be nire likeable?
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[ "So I just realized I have no friends All my life ive been a loner but as I progress in life I am beginning to realize that a truly have no friends.No one hits up my DMs or anything.I don't think I'm a boring person but every time I talk to someone they just walk away.Is there anything I can do to be nire likeable?" ]
81
Así que me acabo de dar cuenta de que no tengo amigos Toda mi vida he sido un solitario, pero a medida que progreso en la vida estoy empezando a darme cuenta de que un verdadero no tiene amigos.Nadie golpea mis DMs ni nada.No creo que sea una persona aburrida pero cada vez que hablo con alguien simplemente se alejan.¿Hay algo que pueda hacer para ser agradable?
I don't understand why I feel suicidal again.I've been struggling with a couple of mental illnesses (I was professionally diagnosed, no self-diagnosing on this post) and suicidal thoughts since I was a pre-teen (I'm 18 now). At one point, when I was 12-14, it was the worst it has ever been. I was being bullied pretty severely and even though I was young, I felt like my life had no purpose. I have never tried to commit suicide before, but I did self-harm for about 4 years. ​ Since I started high school, I started to get better. I'm not bullied anymore, but I still have trouble making friends, feeling positive about myself, etc. If anything, from the outside, my life is getting better everyday. I just got accepted into one of the best nursing programs in my entire state and I'm finally graduating in a couple months. But for some reason, I feel like I'm being really depressed again. I can't really pinpoint why. I've also caught myself having thoughts of suicide and self-harm, which is scary. I haven't had thoughts this bad in a couple years. ​ I'm not really sure why I'm posting this, I guess I just needed to get it off of my chest somehow.
[ "selfharm" ]
[ "I don't understand why I feel suicidal again.I've been struggling with a couple of mental illnesses (I was professionally diagnosed, no self-diagnosing on this post) and suicidal thoughts since I was a pre-teen (I'm 18 now).At one point, when I was 12-14, it was the worst it has ever been.I was being bullied pretty severely and even though I was young, I felt like my life had no purpose.I have never tried to commit suicide before, but I did self-harm for about 4 years.\n\n​\n\nSince I started high school, I started to get better.I'm not bullied anymore, but I still have trouble making friends, feeling positive about myself, etc.If anything, from the outside, my life is getting better everyday.I just got accepted into one of the best nursing programs in my entire state and I'm finally graduating in a couple months.But for some reason, I feel like I'm being really depressed again.I can't really pinpoint why.I've also caught myself having thoughts of suicide and self-harm, which is scary.I haven't had thoughts this bad in a couple years.​\n\nI'm not really sure why I'm posting this, I guess I just needed to get it off of my chest somehow." ]
292
No entiendo por qué me siento suicida de nuevo.He estado luchando con un par de enfermedades mentales (me diagnosticaron profesionalmente, ningún autodiagnóstico en este post) y pensamientos suicidas desde que era un preadolescente (ahora tengo 18 años).En un momento, cuando tenía 12-14 años, fue lo peor que ha sido.Estaba siendo acosado bastante severamente y aunque era joven, sentí que mi vida no tenía ningún propósito.Nunca he tratado de suicidarme antes, pero me autolesioné durante unos 4 años. ​ Desde que empecé la escuela secundaria, empecé a mejorar.Ya no estoy más intimidado, pero todavía tengo problemas para hacer amigos, sentirme positivo conmigo mismo, etc.Si algo, desde el exterior, mi vida está mejorando cada día.Acabo de ser aceptado en uno de los mejores programas de enfermería en todo mi estado y finalmente me graduo en un par de meses.Pero por alguna razón, me siento como que estoy realmente deprimido.
VeinsI've struggled with depression and anxiety the majority of my adolescent life. That being said, I'm no stranger to the temptations of suicide. I attempted suicide once, back in highschool, but I have always had an issue with self-harm. I gave my life to God after my suicide attempt, and that seemed to alleviate the pain for a season, and I sobered up (in reference to cutting) for nearly three years afterwards. Now, I'm nearly 21 and almost a divorcee. Some days I'm fine. Other days, I struggle to get out of bed in the morning. The love of my life, my best friend of six years who helped me through my depression and brought me to God, decided that I wasn't good enough for him anymore. He cheated on me, God only knows how many times with different people, and is now happy in a new relationship. I feel like I'm starting the grieving process all over again. I was happy with starting anew, in acceptance that my marriage was over. Now I alternate between the stages: Some days I'm angry and bitter and seek revenge. Some days I come home from work and just go straight to bed because if one more person asks me if I'm ok, I'm just going to lose it. And some days (I prefer these days), I get all glammed up and uphold a "too hot for you" attitude. Sadly, those days are few and far between. I've become increasingly aware of how prominent the veins in my arm are. They are tiny, but the blue/purple tinge provides a nice contrast to my porcelain "Casper The Friendly Ghost" arms. I often fantasize about coming home from a long, hard day at work, running a nice, warm bathtub of water, and slitting them open, leaving my roommates to find me. I know that sounds disturbing, and probably selfish, but all I've done is act selflessly only to be screwed over and abandoned. Sometimes, the only thing stopping me is knowing that my husky relies on me and that if I died, he'd be sent to live with my ex where he'd be neglected.
[ "selfharm" ]
[ "VeinsI've struggled with depression and anxiety the majority of my adolescent life.That being said, I'm no stranger to the temptations of suicide.I attempted suicide once, back in highschool, but I have always had an issue with self-harm.I gave my life to God after my suicide attempt, and that seemed to alleviate the pain for a season, and I sobered up (in reference to cutting) for nearly three years afterwards.Now, I'm nearly 21 and almost a divorcee.Some days I'm fine.Other days, I struggle to get out of bed in the morning.The love of my life, my best friend of six years who helped me through my depression and brought me to God, decided that I wasn't good enough for him anymore.He cheated on me, God only knows how many times with different people, and is now happy in a new relationship.I feel like I'm starting the grieving process all over again.I was happy with starting anew, in acceptance that my marriage was over.Now I alternate between the stages: Some days I'm angry and bitter and seek revenge.Some days I come home from work and just go straight to bed because if one more person asks me if I'm ok, I'm just going to lose it.", "And some days (I prefer these days), I get all glammed up and uphold a \"too hot for you\" attitude.Sadly, those days are few and far between.I've become increasingly aware of how prominent the veins in my arm are.They are tiny, but the blue/purple tinge provides a nice contrast to my porcelain \"Casper The Friendly Ghost\" arms.I often fantasize about coming home from a long, hard day at work, running a nice, warm bathtub of water, and slitting them open, leaving my roommates to find me.I know that sounds disturbing, and probably selfish, but all I've done is act selflessly only to be screwed over and abandoned.Sometimes, the only thing stopping me is knowing that my husky relies on me and that if I died, he'd be sent to live with my ex where he'd be neglected." ]
274
VenesHe luchado contra la depresión y la ansiedad la mayoría de mi vida adolescente. Dicho esto, no soy ajeno a las tentaciones del suicidio.Intenté suicidarme una vez, en la escuela secundaria, pero siempre he tenido un problema con autolesiones.Le di mi vida a Dios después de mi intento de suicidio, y eso parecía aliviar el dolor durante una temporada, y sobria (en referencia a cortar) durante casi tres años después.Ahora, estoy casi 21 y casi divorciado.Algunos días estoy bien.Otros días, lucho por levantarme de la cama por la mañana.El amor de mi vida, mi mejor amigo de seis años que me ayudó a través de mi depresión y me trajo a Dios, decidí que ya no era lo suficientemente bueno para él.Él me engañó, sólo Dios sabe cuántas veces con diferentes personas, y ahora es feliz en una nueva relación.Me siento como que estoy empezando el proceso de duelo de nuevo.Me sentí feliz de empezar de nuevo con una nueva, de que mi matrimonio se había acabado.Ahora me alterno entre las etapas: Algunos días de enojo y deseo la venganza.
Boys an girls of all ages today is a very special day Reddit on my phone just turned into dark mode after a year of not working, it just turned on by itself
[]
[ "Boys an girls of all ages today is a very special day Reddit on my phone just turned into dark mode after a year of not working, it just turned on by itself" ]
36
Chicos unas chicas de todas las edades hoy es un día muy especial Reddit en mi teléfono acaba de convertirse en modo oscuro después de un año de no trabajar, sólo se encendió por sí mismo
Im running out of ways to convince myself life is worth fighting for.I don't know what to say anymore. To anyone. I can only come to the conclusion that I can't fix my mind or my life and that the only clear option is to go on my terms. I had to watch one of the closest people to me die very painfully from cancer two years ago and now I have been diagnosed with early stages. I am 'young', but I can't seem to get insurance no matter how hard I try for the last year. All of this not including the fact I was diagnosed with as bipolar last year after a stay in a psych ward. And I can no longer afford the medication that was finally helping because I no longer have insurance. I haven't been able to hold down a job for more then 6 months at a time because eventually I lose my mind and and start having panic attacks before work and even if I can manage to drag myself in, it's very noticeable and I usually get reprimanded at some point for being to emotional or sad and am threatened with losing hours, causing me to hate myself even more and very quickly I get much worse to the point I stop showing up thinking them to be better off without me. I am currently on my second month of staying with my mother because I found cameras set up in my house recording me (my roommate apparently thought we were more and decided to make sure I didn't cheat) and I had no where else to go, hoping it would be a short stay but knowing because of my abysmal credit I was going to need to substantially increase my savings to cover all these moves plus things left behind. I was forced out of my most recent job because I tried to be proactive and talk to my manager about things i was having trouble with (tension between staff not involving me) and how it was starting to make me not able to preform my job, his solution of a public discussion of course bringing me into the situation. Then I found a new shit job but fuck I got to get a place to live right? And the day I start work I get a text saying my grandfather has died. So needless to say I fucked that job up. Now my mom. I want so badly to have this relationship that is in my head. And I thought we made so much progress. And believe me I hate myself for needing to ask for help. (I mean I hate myself for a lot more but...) But she's pretty disgusted with me. I mean I am disgusted with myself. I don't think I can fix it. When you get in a car accident your insurance company will total your car when they decide the damages are greater then the car is worth. So isn't this the same?
[ "selfharm" ]
[ "Im running out of ways to convince myself life is worth fighting for.I don't know what to say anymore.To anyone.I can only come to the conclusion that I can't fix my mind or my life and that the only clear option is to go on my terms.I had to watch one of the closest people to me die very painfully from cancer two years ago and now I have been diagnosed with early stages.I am 'young', but I can't seem to get insurance no matter how hard I try for the last year.All of this not including the fact I was diagnosed with as bipolar last year after a stay in a psych ward.And I can no longer afford the medication that was finally helping because I no longer have insurance.I haven't been able to hold down a job for more then 6 months at a time because eventually I lose my mind and and start having panic attacks before work and even if I can manage to drag myself in, it's very noticeable and I usually get reprimanded at some point for being to emotional or sad and am threatened with losing hours, causing me to hate myself even more and very quickly I get much worse to the point I stop showing up thinking them to be better off without me.", "I am currently on my second month of staying with my mother because I found cameras set up in my house recording me (my roommate apparently thought we were more and decided to make sure I didn't cheat) and I had no where else to go, hoping it would be a short stay but knowing because of my abysmal credit I was going to need to substantially increase my savings to cover all these moves plus things left behind.I was forced out of my most recent job because I tried to be proactive and talk to my manager about things i was having trouble with (tension between staff not involving me) and how it was starting to make me not able to preform my job, his solution of a public discussion of course bringing me into the situation.Then I found a new shit job but fuck I got to get a place to live right?And the day I start work I get a text saying my grandfather has died.So needless to say I fucked that job up.Now my mom.I want so badly to have this relationship that is in my head.And I thought we made so much progress.And believe me I hate myself for needing to ask for help.(I mean I hate myself for a lot more but...)But she's pretty disgusted with me.I mean I am disgusted with myself.", "I don't think I can fix it.When you get in a car accident your insurance company will total your car when they decide the damages are greater then the car is worth.So isn't this the same?" ]
261
Me estoy quedando sin maneras de convencerme de que vale la pena luchar por la vida.No sé qué decir más.A nadie.Sólo puedo llegar a la conclusión de que no puedo arreglar mi mente o mi vida y que la única opción clara es seguir mis términos.Tuve que ver a una de las personas más cercanas a mí morir muy dolorosamente de cáncer hace dos años y ahora me han diagnosticado con etapas tempranas.Soy 'jóven', pero no puedo conseguir un seguro sin importar lo duro que lo intente durante el último año.Todo esto sin incluir el hecho de que me diagnosticaron como bipolar el año pasado después de una estancia en una sala de psiquiatría.Y ya no puedo permitirme el medicamento que finalmente estaba ayudando porque ya no tengo seguro.No he sido capaz de mantener un trabajo durante más de 6 meses a la vez porque eventualmente pierdo la cabeza y empiezo a tener ataques de pánico antes de trabajar e incluso si puedo conseguir arrastrarme a mí mismo porque ya no tengo seguro.No he sido capaz de mantener un trabajo durante más de 6 meses a la vez porque con el tiempo pierdo la cabeza y me siento amenazado con perder horas, causándome a odiarme aún mejor y mucho más rápidamente para que me dejo de mostrarme.
Do you think mainstream media does more vad than good, or more good than bad? Mainstream media being CNN, FOX MSNBC, ETC. A: More bad than good B: More good than bad No real reason for me posting this, just seeing what you guys think about this topic.
[]
[ "Do you think mainstream media does more vad than good, or more good than bad?Mainstream media being CNN, FOX MSNBC, ETC.A: More bad than good\n\nB: More good than badNo real reason for me posting this, just seeing what you guys think about this topic." ]
63
¿Crees que los medios tradicionales hacen más vad que bueno, o más bien que malo?Los medios principales son CNN, FOX MSNBC, ETC.A: Más malo que bueno B: Más bueno que maloNo hay razón real para publicar esto, sólo ver lo que piensan sobre este tema.
I only have one reason to be aliveIt would fucking CRUSH my mom if I killed myself. There is literally no other reason for me to live, and I generally hate being alive. My mom knows I’ve battled depression and “used” to be suicidal. She’s told me that if I ever killed myself, she would become a shell of a woman. There’s no way I could ever do that to her. I’m afraid that when she dies, I won’t be around much longer either.
[ "selfharm" ]
[ "I only have one reason to be aliveIt would fucking CRUSH my mom if I killed myself.There is literally no other reason for me to live, and I generally hate being alive.My mom knows I’ve battled depression and “used” to be suicidal.She’s told me that if I ever killed myself, she would become a shell of a woman.There’s no way I could ever do that to her.I’m afraid that when she dies, I won’t be around much longer either." ]
108
Yo sólo tengo una razón para estar vivo. Mi madre sabe que he luchado contra la depresión y “usado” para suicidarme. Ella me ha dicho que si alguna vez me mataba a mí mismo, ella se convertiría en un caparazón de una mujer. No hay manera de que pueda hacerle eso. Me temo que cuando ella muera, yo tampoco estaré por aquí mucho más tiempo.
Tell me one good reason to liveTell me one good reason to live 1) I weigh around 90 kgs. I am overweight even though no one (literally NO ONE) in my family is overweight, not my brothers, not my sisters, not parents or grandparents but I don't know why I am overweight. Technically I should have had the same genetics as my parents but I have the exact opposite. I gain fat easily and have a tough time to shred weight. I can't eat whatever I want to and that's frustrating. 2) I have pimples on my face and have been facing this problem since the age of 14. And when pimples leave my face they leave a spot there. I had treatments for them and it worked but as soon as I leave the medicines they come back. Now I can't be having these creams and capsules forever and it needs to stop sometime. No one in my family has pimples. Right now the pimples and somewhat less but you never know when they will come back. 3) My eyesight was very good since the beginning but in 2007 I had meningitis and after that my eyesight became poor and poor. And finally I had to wear glasses. Now I am stuck with glasses forever unless I do a operation which I feel I don't want to because these glasses shouldn't have been there the first time. My eyesight was good and meningitis changed it. Why do things happen to me. 4) My teeths are not in proper shape as they should as front teeths are not in normal position which is visible when I smile. Even though is this not something that hurts me so much but this shouldn't be there the first time. 5) My height is 5'8 even though my father is 6'1 and mother has decent height for a women. This is absolutely not fair. I tried my best and did exercises to increase height but all in vain. It looks like I am cursed.. No? 6) I used to have man boobs throughout my school and college life l and I used to wear a tight vest so that it compresses my boobs. When I looked online I came to know I had gynaecomastia. This meant my man boobs had to be removed through surgery. How embarrassing is this lol. In the end I decised to have surgery and got it removed but again it shouldn't be there in the first place and I shouldn't have wasted my childhood and college life hiding,not going swiming, not able to take my shirt off and feeling low in confidence for such a long time when I should be enjoying. 7) I think I have phimosis. My foreskin is retractable but becomes very tight during enlargement. I tried to have sex with a girl when we both were drunk but my penis is very sensitive to touch I just couldn't insert it because of pain in skin and irritation on penis glans. Now how embarrassing and frustrating is this for a guy, I leave it up to you to think. 8) I am extremely shy and low in confidence guy. I can't talk in front of a class or a group. I just can't talk to girls and if a girl is attractive then just forget it. 9) I didn't have a girlfriend my entire life.I just can't talk to them and If I talk then I always become the creepy guy. I have to go to brothel if I want to have sex and spend 300$ for sex which other guys are doing for free. I can only have sex with condom on becuase then my penis glans is covered and there is no friction directly on the glans. 10) I tried to commit suicide in 2018 but it didn't go according to plan. Afterwards my parents took me to a psychologist and he gave me Medicines. I am still on medication but this has to stop sometime and it cannot continue forever. 11) Currently I am studying overseas but I am back in my country because of covid and studying online. I am not getting good marks and just can't concentrate. All the money that my parents have invested on me is going in vain. 12) For last one year I have been noticing hairfall. Now this is genetic in my family but so is being over 6ft height, being slim, and being without pimples and other shit. So this means all the bad things that are genetic pass on and good things are prohibited. Lol. Now who would want to live such a life? What would you do if you were me?
[ "selfharm" ]
[ "Tell me one good reason to liveTell me one good reason to live\n\n1) I weigh around 90 kgs.I am overweight even though no one (literally NO ONE) in my family is overweight, not my brothers, not my sisters, not parents or grandparents but I don't know why I am overweight.Technically I should have had the same genetics as my parents but I have the exact opposite.I gain fat easily and have a tough time to shred weight.I can't eat whatever I want to and that's frustrating.2) I have pimples on my face and have been facing this problem since the age of 14.And when pimples leave my face they leave a spot there.I had treatments for them and it workedbut as soon as I leave the medicines they come back.Now I can't be having these creams and capsules forever and it needs to stop sometime.No one in my family has pimples.Right now the pimples and somewhat lessbut you never know when they will come back.3)My eyesight was very good since the beginning but in 2007 I had meningitis and after that my eyesight became poor and poor.And finally I had to wear glasses.", "Now I am stuck with glasses forever unless I do a operation which I feel I don't want to because these glasses shouldn't have been there the first time.My eyesight was good and meningitis changed it.Why do things happen to me.4)My teeths are not in proper shape as they should as front teeths are not in normal position which is visible when I smile.Even though is this not something that hurts me so much but this shouldn't be there the first time.\n\n5)My height is 5'8 even though my father is 6'1 and mother has decent height for a women.This is absolutely not fair.I tried my best and did exercises to increase height but all in vain.It looks like I am cursed..No?\n\n6) I used to have man boobs throughout my school and college life land I used to wear a tight vest so that it compresses my boobs.When I looked online I came to know I had gynaecomastia.This meant my man boobs had to be removed through surgery.How embarrassing is this lol.", "In the end I decised to have surgery and got it removed but again it shouldn't be there in the first place and I shouldn't have wasted my childhood and college life hiding,not going swiming, not able to take my shirt off and feeling low in confidence for such a long time when I should be enjoying.\n\n7)I think I have phimosis.My foreskin is retractable but becomes very tight during enlargement.I tried to have sex with a girl when we both were drunk but my penis is very sensitive to touch I just couldn't insert it because of pain in skin and irritation on penis glans.Now how embarrassing and frustrating is this for a guy, I leave it up to you to think.8) I am extremely shy and low in confidence guy.I can't talk in front of a class or a group.I just can't talk to girls and if a girl is attractive then just forget it.9)I didn't have a girlfriend my entire life.I just can't talk to them and If I talk then I always become the creepy guy.I have to go to brothel if I want to have sex and spend 300$ for sex which other guys are doing for free.I can only have sex with condom on becuase then my penis glans is covered and there is no friction directly on the glans.\n\n", "10) I tried to commit suicide in 2018but it didn't go according to plan.Afterwards my parents took me to a psychologist and he gave me Medicines.I am still on medication but this has to stop sometime and it cannot continue forever.\n\n11)Currently I am studying overseasbut I am back in my country because of covid and studying online.I am not getting good marks and just can't concentrate.All the money that my parents have invested on me is going in vain.\n\n12)For last one year I have been noticing hairfall.Now this is genetic in my family but so is being over 6ft height, being slim, and being without pimples and other shit.So this means all the bad things that are genetic pass on and good things are prohibited.Lol.Now who would want to live such a life?What would you do if you were me?" ]
246
Dime una buena razón para vivir Dime una buena razón para vivir 1) peso alrededor de 90 kg. Tengo sobrepeso, aunque nadie (literalmente NADIE) en mi familia tiene sobrepeso, no mis hermanos, no mis hermanas, no mis padres o abuelos, pero no sé por qué tengo sobrepeso.Técnicamente debería haber tenido la misma genética que mis padres, pero tengo exactamente lo contrario.Yo gano grasa fácilmente y tengo un tiempo difícil para triturar el peso.No puedo comer lo que quiera y eso es frustrante.2) Tengo granos en la cara y he estado enfrentando este problema desde la edad de 14 años.Y cuando los granos dejan mi cara dejan un lugar allí.Tuve tratamientos para ellos y funcionó pero tan pronto como dejé los medicamentos vuelven.Ahora no puedo tener estas cremas y cápsulas para siempre y tiene que parar en algún momento.Nadie en mi familia tiene granos.Ahora mismo las granos y algo menos nunca sabes cuándo volverán.3)Mi vista era muy buena desde el principio pero en 2007 tuve meningitis y después de que se hizo pobre y pobre.Y finalmente tuve que usar gafas.
No one cares, nor do II just lost the one person who probably cared for me yesterday. We’re not friends anymore due to me being possibly bipolar, I understand them leaving. Now I have no one. No friend, no motivation, no reason to live.
[ "selfharm" ]
[ "No one cares, nor do II just lost the one person who probably cared for me yesterday.We’re not friends anymore due to me being possibly bipolar, I understand them leaving.Now I have no one.No friend, no motivation, no reason to live." ]
54
A nadie le importa, ni a II simplemente perdió a la única persona que probablemente me cuidó ayer.Ya no somos amigos debido a que soy posiblemente bipolar, entiendo que se vayan.Ahora no tengo a nadie.Sin amigo, sin motivación, sin razón para vivir.
I wrote a haiku after all my friends left the groupchat for bed Once all depart me I sit all on my lonesome Contemplating life
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[ "I wrote a haiku after all my friends left the groupchat for bed Once all depart me\nI sit all on my lonesome\nContemplating life" ]
32
Escribí un haiku después de que todos mis amigos dejaran el groupchat para la cama Una vez que todo me fuera me siento todo en mi vida solitaria contemplando
The unavailability of guns in most countries is what stops people from killing themselvesSeriously if guns were wildly available like in the U.S it would be loads easier, and 2800 U$ dollars for a fucking Glock ? Fuck this shit.
[ "selfharm" ]
[ "The unavailability of guns in most countries is what stops people from killing themselvesSeriously if guns were wildly available like in the U.S it would be loads easier, and 2800 U$ dollars for a fucking Glock ?Fuck this shit." ]
54
La falta de disponibilidad de armas en la mayoría de los países es lo que impide que la gente se mate en serio si las armas estuvieran salvajemente disponibles como en los EE.UU. sería mucho más fácil, y 2800 dólares por una maldita Glock?
I got 30/100 from math and my grade average drop to 63 from 77. What the fuck!!!! Why the fuck is that class is compulsory. I hate the fucking education system. Fucking killed my mood.
[]
[ "I got 30/100 from math and my grade average drop to 63 from 77.What the fuck!!!!Why the fuck is that class is compulsory.I hate the fucking education system.Fucking killed my mood." ]
44
Obtuve 30/100 de matemáticas y mi promedio de baja a 63 de 77. ¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡!¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡!¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡!¡¡¡¡¡¡!¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡!¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡!¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡!¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡!¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡!¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡!¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡
I’m uselessI can’t do anything. I’m dumb, have no talents or skills and can learn how to grow smarter and don’t have a use. I’m, well useless so it wouldn’t matter if I were to die
[ "selfharm" ]
[ "I’m uselessI can’t do anything.I’m dumb, have no talents or skills and can learn how to grow smarter and don’t have a use.I’m, well useless so it wouldn’t matter if I were to die" ]
53
Soy inútilNo puedo hacer nada. Soy tonto, no tengo talentos ni habilidades y puedo aprender a ser más inteligente y no tengo un uso. Soy, bien inútil por lo que no importaría si me muriera
What if we're in hell? What if this is hell? It's not physically painful but mentally? I think it's a good possibility, god took away our memories and sent us here to suffer, maybe death is just going to a different life to suffer, just erase your memories and be born again
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[ "What if we're in hell?What if this is hell?It's not physically painful but mentally?I think it's a good possibility, god took away our memories and sent us here to suffer, maybe death is just going to a different life to suffer, just erase your memories and be born again" ]
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¿Qué pasa si estamos en el infierno?¿Qué pasa si esto es el infierno?¿No es físicamente doloroso sino mentalmente?Creo que es una buena posibilidad, Dios se llevó nuestros recuerdos y nos envió aquí para sufrir, tal vez la muerte sólo va a una vida diferente para sufrir, sólo borrar sus recuerdos y nacer de nuevo
are you sushi cause i really love you im getting sushi
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[ "are you sushi cause i really love you\n\nim getting sushi" ]
13
¿Eres sushi porque te quiero de verdad?
How?okay im a straight 19 year old hetero. but i live in mordor (balkan) so women here are stupid and comlex. i dont care i dont need them. i would like to date myself before i move to western europe for a temporary while. i am okay with autosexuality cause i know how it feels to be abused and not having to lean on anything but yourself. i slightly cross-dress in my room for 20 minutes to make myself my own girlfriend and i talk to the mirror with myself. i gave this female version of myself the name Tiffany. i talk to myself thismway in front of the mirror and i onlymsee tiffany in front of my eyes- so i feel my male self, my male body, talking to a girl behind that mirror. i can make my pitch into female easy causen i am a amateur singer in my shower haha. its like socialising with the female friend that i never had. plus i get to feel what a respectable man behaves like. so how do i start this temporary secret romance?
[ "selfharm" ]
[ "How?okay im a straight 19 year old hetero.but i live in mordor (balkan) so women here are stupid and comlex.i dont care i dont need them.i would like to date myself before i move to western europe for a temporary while.i am okay with autosexuality cause i know how it feels to be abused and not having to lean on anything but yourself.i slightly cross-dress in my room for 20 minutes to make myself my own girlfriend and i talk to the mirror with myself.i gave this female version of myself the name Tiffany.i talk to myself thismway in front of the mirror and i onlymsee tiffany in front of my eyes-so i feel my male self, my male body, talking to a girl behind that mirror.i can make my pitch into female easy causen i am a amateur singer in my shower haha.its like socialising with the female friend that i never had.plus i get to feel what a respectable man behaves like.so how do i start this temporary secret romance?" ]
228
¿Cómo? okay im un hetero de 19 años hetero.but vivo en mordor (balkan) por lo que las mujeres aquí son estúpidos y comlex.i no me importa que no los necesito.me gustaría salir conmigo mismo antes de mudarme a Europa occidental por un tiempo temporal.Estoy bien con la autosexualidad causa sé cómo se siente ser abusado y no tener que apoyarse en nada excepto ti mismo.i ligeramente cruzada en mi habitación durante 20 minutos para hacerme mi propia novia y hablar con el espejo con melf.i dio esta versión femenina de mí mismo el nombre Tiffany.i hablar a mí mismo esta manera frente al espejo y sólo veo tiffany delante de mis ojos-así que siento mi yo mismo masculino, mi cuerpo masculino, hablando con una chica detrás de ese espejo.i puede hacer mi lanzamiento en femenino fácil causan soy una cantante amateur en mi ducha hahaha.its como socializar con la amiga femenina que nunca tuve.
Trying to grow my European/American Teenage discord server 'Teen Trash'. PM or Comment for an invite! FillerFillerFillerFiller
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[ "Trying to grow my European/American Teenage discord server 'Teen Trash'.PM or Comment for an invite! FillerFillerFillerFiller" ]
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Tratando de hacer crecer mi servidor de discordia europeo/estadounidense de adolescentes 'Teen Basura'.PM o ¡Comentario para una invitación!
Guess What?! Debreather!!!So, A few months ago I was reading about the deBreather that was coming out soon. I continually checked the site until it was posted, but they were almost immediately sold out. Then, they moved their inventory apparently, and the right2die site has been showing that message for over a month. I wrote the people 2 times asking them to please tell me right away when one was available. They answered me the second time very quickly and sent me the new link to order one! I immediately ordered the debreather! The shipping was horrid, but it's ordered and I will have it soon. This has been the happiest day I've had so far this year. I hope you all get the help you need or obtain your preferred exit.
[ "selfharm" ]
[ "Guess What?!Debreather!!!So, A few months ago I was reading about the deBreather that was coming out soon.I continually checked the site until it was posted, but they were almost immediately sold out.Then, they moved their inventory apparently, and the right2die site has been showing that message for over a month.I wrote the people 2 times asking them to please tell me right away when one was available.They answered me the second time very quickly and sent me the new link to order one!I immediately ordered the debreather!The shipping was horrid, but it's ordered and I will have it soon.This has been the happiest day I've had so far this year.I hope you all get the help you need or obtain your preferred exit." ]
171
Adivina qué?!Debreather!!!Así que, Hace unos meses estaba leyendo sobre el debreather que estaba saliendo pronto.Continuamente revisé el sitio hasta que fue publicado, pero fueron casi inmediatamente agotados.Entonces, se trasladó su inventario aparentemente, y el sitio derech2die ha estado mostrando ese mensaje durante más de un mes.Escribí a la gente 2 veces pidiéndoles que por favor me digan de inmediato cuando uno estaba disponible.Me contestaron la segunda vez muy rápidamente y me enviaron el nuevo enlace para pedir uno!Inmediatamente ordené el debreather!El envío era horrible, pero se ordenó y lo tendré pronto.Este ha sido el día más feliz que he tenido hasta ahora este año.Espero que todos ustedes obtengan la ayuda que necesitan u obtengan su salida preferida.
WHY CANT I JUST MEET SOMEONE HY FUCK FUCKING FUCK DUCK DHDHHDDHHDHDHDHDHHDHDHDHDHDHDHDDDHDHDHDHDHDHDHDHHDHDHDHDDHHDHDHDHDHDHDDHDHDHHDDHDHDHHDHDHDHDHDHDHHDHDHDHDHDHDHDHDHDHDDHDHDHDHDHDDDHDHHDHHHDHD idk why I’m still up. Idk why im still waiting for her to reach out. Idk why I think she ever will. Please hmu
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[ "WHY CANT I JUST MEET SOMEONE HY FUCK FUCKING FUCK DUCK DHDHHDDHHDHDHDHDHHDHDHDHDHDHDHDDDHDHDHDHDHDHDHDHHDHDHDHDDHHDHDHDHDHDHDDHDHDHHDDHDHDHHDHDHDHDHDHDHHDHDHDHDHDHDHDHDHDHDDHDHDHDHDHDDDHDHHDHHHDHD\n\n\n\n\nidk why I’m still up.Idk why im still waiting for her to reach out.Idk why I think she ever will.Please hmu" ]
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POR QUÉ CANT acabo de conocer a alguien, HY FUCK FUCK DUCK DHDHHDDHDHDHDHDHDHDHDHDHDHDHDHDHDHDHDHDHDHDHHDHDHDHDHDHDHDHDHDHDDHDHDHDHDHDHDHDHDHDHDHDHHDHDHDHDHDHDHDHDDHDHDHDHDHDHDHHDHHD por qué sigo despierto.Idk por qué sigo esperando que ella se ponga en contacto.Idk por qué creo que lo hará.Por favor hmu
I think somethings wrong with me A few days ago, I was thinking about hurting someone who hurt me like 2 months ago. The thing is the way I hurt them, In my head, to a normal mind would seem horrible, but I didn't feel any regret, I still don't as a matter of fact I felt really really good but not in a "oh that was strange" way. Things have been happening to me mentaly, that no one is in control of not even me. I feel like a different person, I don't know what's going on. I'm going to a counceler about my sadness at the moment and I'm almost finished, I just don't feel comfortable talking to anyone about it
[]
[ "I think somethings wrong with me A few days ago, I was thinking about hurting someone who hurt me like 2 months ago.The thing is the way I hurt them, In my head, to a normal mind would seem horrible, but I didn't feel any regret, I still don't as a matter of fact I felt really really good but not in a \"oh that was strange\" way.Things have been happening to me mentaly, that no one is in control of not even me.I feel like a different person, I don't know what's going on.I'm going to a counceler about my sadness at the moment and I'm almost finished, I just don't feel comfortable talking to anyone about it" ]
157
Creo que algo está mal conmigo Hace unos días, estaba pensando en herir a alguien que me lastimó como hace dos meses.La cosa es la forma en que los lastimé, en mi cabeza, a una mente normal parecería horrible, pero no sentí ningún pesar, todavía no me siento de hecho realmente muy bien, pero no de una manera "oh que era extraño".Las cosas me han estado pasando mentalmente, que nadie está en control ni siquiera de mí.Me siento como una persona diferente, no sé lo que está pasando.Voy a un concelente acerca de mi tristeza en este momento y estoy casi terminado, simplemente no me siento cómodo hablando con nadie sobre ello.
A tumblr user has just said she was going to kill herself and has stopped posting since. http://spys-cock.tumblr.com/post/39265783217/im-so-tired-if-even-being-alive-anymore-i-dont This was her last post, 50 minutes ago, she was posting every few minutes before that. she is living in Britain and has borderline personality disorder. I dont know what to do, I only know her on the internet and I live in Singapore, is there any way to help her???
[ "selfharm" ]
[ "A tumblr user has just said she was going to kill herself and has stopped posting since.http://spys-cock.tumblr.com/post/39265783217/im-so-tired-if-even-being-alive-anymore-i-dontThis was her last post, 50 minutes ago, she was posting every few minutes before that.she is living in Britain and has borderline personality disorder.I dont know what to do, I only know her on the internet and I live in Singapore, is there any way to help her???" ]
127
Una usuaria de tumblr acaba de decir que se iba a suicidar y ha dejado de publicar desde entonces.http://spys-cock.tumblr.com/post/39265783217/im-tan-cansado-si-even-ser-vivo-anymore-i-dontEste fue su último post, hace 50 minutos, ella estaba publicando cada pocos minutos antes de eso.ella está viviendo en Gran Bretaña y tiene desorden de personalidad límite.No sé qué hacer, sólo la conozco en Internet y vivo en Singapur, ¿hay alguna manera de ayudarla??
kissanime getting taken away from us is peak classism i’m sorry but theres no fricking way i’m resorting to crunchyroll 😤
[]
[ "kissanime getting taken away from us is peak classism i’m sorrybut theres no fricking way i’m resorting to crunchyroll 😤" ]
35
besonime conseguir llevado lejos de nosotros es el clasismo de pico I’m lo sentimos, pero no hay manera maldita estoy recurriendo a crunchyroll
Join my dead server, trying to revive Dm me for link.
[]
[ "Join my dead server, trying to revive Dm me for link." ]
14
Únete a mi servidor muerto, tratando de revivirme por enlace.
I think you'd like to know this In Brazil the "Walmart" company isn't walmart. Instead, it's a huge shopping we call "BIG". Like, we literally call it BIG Thank you
[]
[ "I think you'd like to know this In Brazil the \"Walmart\" company isn't walmart.Instead, it's a huge shopping we call \"BIG\".Like, we literally call it BIG\n\n\nThank you" ]
52
Creo que te gustaría saber esto En Brasil la compañía "Walmart" no es Walmart, sino que es una gran compra que llamamos "BIG".Como, literalmente lo llamamos BIG Gracias
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[ "01110100 01101001 01110100 01101100 01100101 01100010 01110010 01110101 01101000 00100000 01110111 01101000 01111001 00100000 01100001 01110010 01100101 00100000 01111001 01101111 01110101 00100000 01110100 01110010 01100001 01101110 01110011 01101100 01100001 01110100 01101001 01101110 01100111 00100000 01100001 00100000 01110010 01100101 01100100 01100100 01101001 01110100 00100000 01110000 01101111 01110011 01110100 00100000 01101001 01101110 00100000 01100010 01101001 01101110 01100001 01110010 01111001 00100000 01100111 01101111 00100000 01100010 01100001 01100011 01101011 00100000 01110100 01101111 00100000 01100011 01101100 01100001 01110011 01110011" ]
227
01110100 01101001 01110100 01101100 01101100 01100101 01100010 0111010 01110101 01101000 00100000 011111 0110110 0111001 00100000 01100001 0111001 01101001 01100101 00100000 0111001 0111011 01110101 00100000 01110100 0111010 01100001 01101110 01100001 01110001 01110001 01101001 01101110 0110011 00100000 01100001 0110010 01100101 01100101 01100100 01100100 01100100 01101001 01110100 00100000 01110110 0110111111 011011110110011 01110100 00100000 01101001 01101001 01101110 00100000 01100010 01101001 01101001 01101110 01100001 0111001 0111001 0111001 00100000 0110001001 0110011 0110 0110011 0110011 0110011 0110011 0110011 0110011 0110011 0110011 0110011 01101101101111111101100110110011011001101100110110011111101100110110011011001111111101100111111111111011001101100110110011111111110110011011001111011001101111111110110011111101100110110011011001101100110110011011001101100110110011011001101100110110011011001101111101110111011001101100110110011011001101100110110011011001101100110110011
DJ-ing next to radishes 🎵
[]
[ "DJ-ing next to radishes 🎵" ]
11
DJ-ing junto a rábanos
Hey male 15 looking to chat. Dm me Filler filler filler filler filler filler filler Filler filler filler filler filler filler filler Filler filler filler filler filler filler filler
[]
[ "Hey male 15 looking to chat.Dm me Filler filler filler filler filler filler filler Filler filler filler filler filler filler filler Filler filler filler filler filler filler filler" ]
52
Oye macho 15 buscando para chatear.Dm me relleno relleno relleno relleno relleno relleno relleno relleno relleno relleno relleno relleno relleno relleno relleno
Sweden seems great, it’s over 1500km from Zürich And It’s not the us, and it’s less cold than Canada But it’s over 1500km from Zürich, it’s like a 20 hour drive that’s perfect, not day trip close but it’s I could go there if I wanted with relative ease close, if it’s close enough that you could take a day trip to Zürich it’s too close
[]
[ "Sweden seems great, it’s over 1500km from ZürichAnd It’s not the us, and it’s less cold than CanadaBut it’s over 1500km from Zürich, it’s like a 20 hour drive that’s perfect, not day trip closebut it’s I could go there if I wanted with relative ease close, if it’s close enough that you could take a day trip to Zürich it’s too close" ]
97
Suecia parece genial, está a más de 1500 km de ZürichY no es el nosotros, y es menos frío que CanadáPero es más de 1500 km de Zürich, es como un viaje de 20 horas que es perfecto, no un viaje de un día cerca, pero es que podría ir allí si quisiera con relativa facilidad cerca, si está lo suficientemente cerca como para que usted podría tomar un viaje de un día a Zürich está demasiado cerca
Planning on killing myself soonProbably pop some pills or jump off the nearby cliff by the beach. I've struggled for years, called a survivor. I can't survive if it means living in pain every day. I wish I could apologize to everyone who I'll end up hurting because of me dying but I can't and honestly at this point part of me doesn't even care what happens, once I'm dead I won't think or feel or really need to worry about that anyway which I know is selfish but I'm terrible anyway so people should have stopped expecting things from me a long time ago.
[ "selfharm" ]
[ "Planning on killing myself soonProbably pop some pills or jump off the nearby cliff by the beach.I've struggled for years, called a survivor.I can't survive if it means living in pain every day.I wish I could apologize to everyone who I'll end up hurting because of me dying but I can't and honestly at this point part of me doesn't even care what happens, once I'm dead I won't think or feel or really need to worry about that anyway which I know is selfish but I'm terribleanyway so people should have stopped expecting things from me a long time ago." ]
131
Planeando matarme prontoProbablemente haga estallar algunas píldoras o salte por el acantilado cercano junto a la playa.He luchado durante años, llamé a un sobreviviente.No puedo sobrevivir si significa vivir con dolor todos los días.Ojalá pudiera disculparme con todos los que terminen lastimando por mi muerte, pero honestamente no puedo y en este punto parte de mí ni siquiera me importa lo que pase, una vez que esté muerto no pensaré o sentiré o realmente necesitaré preocuparme por eso de todas formas que sé que es egoísta pero estoy terriblemente de todas formas así que la gente debería haber dejado de esperar cosas de mí hace mucho tiempo.
I’m so ashamed of myself.I did so many stupid things and was such an asshole to so many people The embarrassment and guilt is just so crippling I don’t how to live with myself anymore. I want to die
[ "selfharm" ]
[ "I’m so ashamed of myself.I did so many stupid things and was such an asshole to so many people\n\nThe embarrassment and guilt is just so crippling\n\nI don’t how to live with myself anymore.I want to die" ]
48
Me avergüenzo tanto de mí mismo.Hice tantas cosas estúpidas y fui un idiota para tanta gente La vergüenza y la culpa es tan paralizante que ya no sé cómo vivir conmigo mismo.Quiero morir
How To: Professional Simp There are 5 (Simp)le steps to achieve this rank 1. You must know your target (there are only 2) - Gamer Girl -Other 2. Stalk the social media page gamer girl uses the most. If the following make sure to: - Instagram: like a photo from like 2015. Then proceed to breath in and breath out say fuck for a minimum of 10 seconds. Your parents must yell at you for the minimum to be met. -Snapchat: people still use that? Huh...well then...next. -Twitch: you hit the jackpot bro. Donate all your birthday money to her and make sure to get really excited when she noticed you and reads your comment. She must have a minimum of 5 viewers. They all must be you from different accounts on different tabs. -OnlyFans: Jack off 6 times to that one picture of her holding a milk jug. Gotta be a milk jug or it don’t count. 3. Take a break and repeat the phrase hoe’s before bro’s 3 times. (30 seconds maximum) 4. Send a picture of the left side of your face with a little bit of eyebrow showing. Not too much or you’ll ruin the picture or your dating life. Gotta be carful. If: Left on open: spam deep fried gamer girl memes. It worked at my job interview. I got promoted to costumer!!!! Delivered: fuk... Sent the same thing back: you have to accidentally bust a nut then clean it up. While you clean you have to send a picture back but this time is says wyd. She should say gaming. If not then...fuk. Don’t ask for noodles yet. Be sure and wait till she’s legal, Ive learned that gamer girls are legal at birth so your good bro. 5. The last step to becoming a Professional Simp. Know the acronym S.I.M.P S: Socially I: Idolize M: Mediocre P: Puss There you go, you should now be qualified for the Simp Olympics coming to r/teenagers some time never because I just made it up :)
[]
[ "How To: Professional Simp There are 5 (Simp)le steps to achieve this rank\n\n1.You must know your target (there are only 2)\n- Gamer Girl\n-Other\n\n2.Stalk the social media page gamer girl uses the most.If the following make sure to:\n- Instagram: like a photo from like 2015.Then proceed to breath in and breath out say fuck for a minimum of 10 seconds.Your parents must yell at you for the minimum to be met.-Snapchat: people still use that?Huh...well then...next.-Twitch:you hit the jackpot bro.Donate all your birthday money to her and make sure to get really excited when she noticed you and reads your comment.She must have a minimum of 5 viewers.They all must be you from different accounts on different tabs.-OnlyFans:Jack off 6 times to that one picture of her holding a milk jug.Gotta be a milk jug or it don’t count.3. Take a break and repeat the phrase hoe’s before bro’s 3 times.(30 seconds maximum)\n\n4.Send a picture of the left side of your face with a little bit of eyebrow showing.Not too much or you’ll ruin the picture or your dating life.Gotta be carful.If:\n\nLeft on open: spam deep fried gamer girl memes.It worked at my job interview.I got promoted to costumer!!!!Delivered: fuk...\n\n", "Sent the same thing back: you have to accidentally bust a nut then clean it up.While you clean you have to send a picture back but this time is says wyd.She should say gaming.If not then...fuk.Don’t ask for noodles yet.Be sure and wait till she’s legal, Ive learned that gamer girls are legal at birth so your good bro.5.The last step to becoming a Professional Simp.Know the acronym S.I.M.P\n\nS: Socially\nI: Idolize\nM: Mediocre\nP: Puss\n\n\nThere you go, you should now be qualified for the Simp Olympics coming to r/teenagers some time never because I just made it up :)" ]
308
Cómo: Profesional Simp Hay 5 (Simp)le pasos para alcanzar este rango 1.Debes conocer tu objetivo (sólo hay 2) - Gamer Girl -Otros 2.Stalk the social media page gamer girl uses the most.If the following assure to: - Instagram: like a photo from it 2015.A continuación, procede a respirar y respirar decir mierda por un mínimo de 10 segundos.Tus padres deben gritarte por lo menos para que se cumpla.-Snapchat: ¿la gente todavía usa eso?Huh...bueno entonces...siguiente...Twitch:tu golpeas el jackpot bro.Dona todo tu dinero de cumpleaños a ella y asegúrate de emocionarte mucho cuando ella te note y lee tu comentario.Ella debe tener un mínimo de 5 espectadores.Todos deben ser de diferentes cuentas en diferentes pestañas.-SóloFans:Apaja 6 veces a esa foto de ella sosteniendo un jack de leche.Gotta be air fair or it kear!
Nig- be like “I don’t wanna die as a virgin” Dude shut up and respect our lord Jesus Christ that died as a virgin to save all of us. Filler filler filler filler filler
[]
[ "Nig- be like “I don’t wanna die as a virgin” Dude shut up and respect our lord Jesus Christ that died as a virgin to save all of us.Filler filler filler filler filler" ]
46
Nig-ser como "No quiero morir como una virgen" Dude callarse y respetar a nuestro señor Jesucristo que murió como una virgen para salvar a todos nosotros.Filler relleno relleno relleno relleno
why the hell is school so corrupted? 7 and a half hours of work that we will never use for 17 years of our life WHAT THE FUCK 4 and a half hours of free time and probably less cause homework no fucking wonder teens get only a few hours of sleep school is keeping them from pursuing their interest and for what so you can determine the angles of a triangle it's all bullshit
[]
[ "why the hell is school so corrupted?7 and a half hours of work that we will never use for 17 years of our life WHAT THE FUCK 4 and a half hours of free time and probably less cause homework no fucking wonder teens get only a few hours of sleep school is keeping them from pursuing their interest and for what so you can determine the angles of a triangle it's all bullshit" ]
79
¿Por qué demonios la escuela está tan corrompida? 7 horas y media de trabajo que nunca usaremos durante 17 años de nuestra vida. QUÉ mierda 4 horas y media de tiempo libre y probablemente menos causa deberes. No es de extrañar que los adolescentes tengan sólo unas pocas horas de escuela de sueño, es evitar que persigan su interés y para qué puedes determinar los ángulos de un triángulo.
I can't stop contemplating suicide...Over the past few months I've been contemplating suicide about 2-3 times a week on average, sometimes more, sometimes less. I can tell you my whole life story but that wouldn't do any good. If I am happy during the day and something turns around I suddenly start thinking about suicide. I really don't even know what to say anymore, I can barely think. I am typically stuck in an emotional purgatory state, I am not happy nor sad, however in an instant I can snap and become extremely depressed or pretty happy.
[ "selfharm" ]
[ "I can't stop contemplating suicide...Over the past few months I've been contemplating suicide about 2-3 times a week on average, sometimes more, sometimes less.I can tell you my whole life story but that wouldn't do any good.If I am happy during the day and something turns around I suddenly start thinking about suicide.I really don't even know what to say anymore, I can barely think.I am typically stuck in an emotional purgatory state, I am not happy nor sad, however in an instant I can snap and become extremely depressed or pretty happy." ]
119
No puedo dejar de contemplar el suicidio...En los últimos meses he estado contemplando el suicidio alrededor de 2-3 veces a la semana en promedio, a veces más, a veces menos.Puedo contarte toda mi historia de la vida, pero eso no haría ningún bien.Si estoy feliz durante el día y algo gira alrededor de repente empiezo a pensar en el suicidio.Realmente ni siquiera sé qué decir más, apenas puedo pensar.Por lo general estoy atrapado en un estado de purgatorio emocional, no estoy feliz ni triste, sin embargo en un instante puedo chasquearme y llegar a ser extremadamente deprimida o bastante feliz.
Stop posting about someone’s death. I know this might be a little controversial and I might get downvoted to oblivion. Almost every day, I see a post about the death of a very close person to someone. There are people who just do it for karma and awards, and others who just fake it. But for those who actually may experience that, please stop. Not only are there edgy teens in this sub, who’ll make you feel bad by giving you certain awards like the “I’m Deceased” award or the “Wholesome” award. Some people take it to the next level in the comments. Secondly, why can’t you have a little bit of discretion for that person who has died? I think it’s a little bit of disrespectful to let thousands of people know about someone’s death. I personally wouldn’t like anyone to post anything about my death. By the way, I’m not shaming on anyone who has done it. If you are seriously looking for people to talk to when having a hard time after someone’s death, go ahead, post about it. But if you deep inside your heart know that it might be for awards and karma, then please don’t do it.
[]
[ "Stop posting about someone’s death.I know this might be a little controversial and I might get downvoted to oblivion.Almost every day, I see a post about the death of a very close person to someone.There are people who just do it for karma and awards, and others who just fake it.But for those who actually may experience that, please stop.Not only are there edgy teens in this sub, who’ll make you feel bad by giving you certain awards like the “I’m Deceased” award or the “Wholesome” award.Some people take it to the next level in the comments.Secondly, why can’t you have a little bit of discretion for that person who has died?I think it’s a little bit of disrespectful to let thousands of people know about someone’s death.I personally wouldn’t like anyone to post anything about my death.By the way, I’m not shaming on anyone who has done it.If you are seriously looking for people to talk to when having a hard time after someone’s death, go ahead, post about it.But if you deep inside your heart know that it might be for awards and karma, then please don’t do it." ]
265
Deja de publicar acerca de la muerte de alguien.Sé que esto puede ser un poco controversial y podría ser rechazado al olvido.Casi todos los días, veo un post sobre la muerte de una persona muy cercana a alguien.Hay personas que sólo lo hacen por karma y premios, y otros que simplemente lo fingen.Pero para aquellos que en realidad pueden experimentar eso, por favor detente.No sólo hay adolescentes nerviosos en este sub, que te harán sentir mal al darte ciertos premios como el premio “Estoy muerto” o el premio “Todo lo que sea”.Algunas personas lo llevan al siguiente nivel en los comentarios.Segundo, ¿por qué no puedes tener un poco de discreción para esa persona que ha muerto?Creo que es un poco irrespetuoso dejar que miles de personas sepan acerca de la muerte de alguien. Personalmente no me gustaría que nadie publicara nada acerca de mi muerte.Por cierto, no estoy avergonzando a nadie que lo haya hecho.Si estás buscando seriamente que la gente hable cuando tenga un tiempo difícil después de la muerte, ve a publicarlo.
I am proud to say I own the Reddit account that goes by the name u/horse-on-a-balcony juan juan juan juan juan juan juan juan juan juan juan juan juan juan juan juan juan juan juan juan
[]
[ "I am proud to say I own the Reddit account that goes by the name u/horse-on-a-balcony juan juan juan juan juan juan juan juan juan juan juan juan juan juan juan juan juan juan juan juan" ]
68
Estoy orgulloso de decir que soy dueño de la cuenta de Reddit que va por el nombre u / caballo-en-a-balcón juan juan juan juan juan juan juan juan juan juan juan juan juan juan juan juan juan juan juan juan juan
Sometimes I want help but sometimes I don’t.Ever since I was old enough to wrap my head around the concept of death, I knew I wanted to go out on my own time. Recently I’ve felt that time was now. I’ve attempted in the past a few times, all of which failed. My first attempt was over some bullshit in the 6th grade that I’m glad I didn’t end it over. I had my dads gun to my head with the door locked because of something one kid said. My second was after my dad had thrown trash across the room, hitting me with it, because I forgot to put a bag in the trash can after I took out the trash. I was going to od. That was in the 8th grade and I fucked up and didn’t take enough. My third attempt was after Christmas 2016. I had had two deaths in the family that year and just the overwhelming sadness over my entire family brought me down to a new low. Plus during that time I was feeling more and more lonely. I hadn’t been in a relationship for a couple of years and it was hitting me hard. Also my dad was being more and more verbally abusive to me and my mom. Yelling, cussing, screaming, making threats, etc. on a nearly daily basis. My plan then was to slit my wrists. Damn that shits hard to do. My fourth attempt was a few weeks ago. My girlfriend (now ex) had told me her plan to kill herself. Me being the over thinker that I am, blamed myself. Me thinking that she wanted to kill herself to get away from me or it being something that I did made me want to end it all. That night I drank excessively hoping for alcohol poisoning while at the same time popping Xanax like it was candy. I was so angry when I woke up the next morning that I was still alive. Since that night, I thought that I had recovered, but now I know I haven’t. For about a week now I’ve had this plan. Yesterday was gonna be the day. Everything lined up. My (ex) girlfriend started the day off with a break up text. I knew it was coming. That girl though... she meant everything to me. I’ve never loved anyone as much as I loved her. Other stuff, too. My friends from kindergarten till now have all turned their backs against me because I’m a “pothead” and an “alcoholic” (neither of which are true). My parents have been getting more and more disappointed in me. I haven’t been happy in a while. I’ve forgotten what happiness feels like. My plan may or may not happen, I’ll just have to wait and see how hard it’s gonna be to pull off. My method, though, will work. But I’m still getting feelings of a small sliver of hope every once in a while. Last night (after my plan had fallen through because I couldn’t get the resources together) I came home more drunk than I’ve ever been. I couldn’t talk. I couldn’t walk. But yet I drove home and made it. I walked in the front door to find my mom and Dad. Knowing there was no way out of it, I confessed to being drunk. In my drunken state I also told them of my recent suicidal thoughts. I’ve since told them that none of what I told them was true and that I just got drunk and told them that. My family has always considered suicide a taboo topic and I should have no reason to be sad. I’m not even sad anymore. I’m just numb. After receiving my punishment today, I want to do this even more. My punishment is a complete loss of all freedom. Plus breathalyzers before and after leaving Home along with drug tests. My freedom was the only thing keeping me alive. This is probably the end for me. I’m done. But then there’s still that small sliver of hope I get. It only lasts for a few seconds but then I’m back to feeling the way I do now. After so many failed attempts, this is going to be the one I don’t fuck up. All I have to do is wait till I can get what I need. It’ll all be over soon. I can’t wait.
[ "selfharm" ]
[ "Sometimes I want help but sometimes I don’t.Ever since I was old enough to wrap my head around the concept of death, I knew I wanted to go out on my own time.Recently I’ve felt that time was now.I’ve attempted in the past a few times, all of which failed.My first attempt was over some bullshit in the 6th grade that I’m glad I didn’t end it over.I had my dads gun to my head with the door locked because of something one kid said.My second was after my dad had thrown trash across the room, hitting me with it, because I forgot to put a bag in the trash can after I took out the trash.I was going to od.That was in the 8th grade and I fucked up and didn’t take enough.My third attempt was after Christmas 2016.I had had two deaths in the family that year and just the overwhelming sadness over my entire family brought me down to a new low.Plus during that time I was feeling more and more lonely.I hadn’t been in a relationship for a couple of years and it was hitting me hard.Also my dad was being more and more verbally abusive to me and my mom.Yelling, cussing, screaming, making threats, etc. on a nearly daily basis.My plan then was to slit my wrists.Damn that shits hard to do.", "My fourth attempt was a few weeks ago.My girlfriend (now ex) had told me her plan to kill herself.Me being the over thinker that I am, blamed myself.Me thinking that she wanted to kill herself to get away from me or it being something that I did made me want to end it all.That night I drank excessively hoping for alcohol poisoning while at the same time popping Xanax like it was candy.I was so angry when I woke up the next morning that I was still alive.Since that night, I thought that I had recovered, but now I know I haven’t.For about a week now I’ve had this plan.Yesterday was gonna be the day.Everything lined up.My (ex) girlfriend started the day off with a break up text.I knew it was coming.That girl though...she meant everything to me.I’ve never loved anyone as much as I loved her.Other stuff, too.My friends from kindergarten till now have all turned their backs against me because I’m a “pothead” and an “alcoholic” (neither of which are true).My parents have been getting more and more disappointed in me.I haven’t been happy in a while.I’ve forgotten what happiness feels like.My plan may or may not happen, I’ll just have to wait and see how hard it’s gonna be to pull off.", "My method, though, will work.But I’m still getting feelings of a small sliver of hope every once in a while.Last night (after my plan had fallen through because I couldn’t get the resources together)I came home more drunk than I’ve ever been.I couldn’t talk.I couldn’t walk.But yet I drove home and made it.I walked in the front door to find my mom and Dad.Knowing there was no way out of it, I confessed to being drunk.In my drunken state I also told them of my recent suicidal thoughts.I’ve since told them that none of what I told them was true and that I just got drunk and told them that.My family has always considered suicide a taboo topic and I should have no reason to be sad.I’m not even sad anymore.I’m just numb.After receiving my punishment today, I want to do this even more.My punishment is a complete loss of all freedom.Plus breathalyzers before and after leaving Home along with drug tests.My freedom was the only thing keeping me alive.This is probably the end for me.I’m done.But then there’s still that small sliver of hope I get.It only lasts for a few seconds but then I’m back to feeling the way I do now.", "After so many failed attempts, this is going to be the one I don’t fuck up.All I have to do is wait till I can get what I need.It’ll all be over soon.I can’t wait." ]
300
A veces quiero ayuda, pero a veces no.Siempre desde que tenía la edad suficiente para envolver mi cabeza en torno al concepto de muerte, sabía que quería salir en mi propio tiempo.Recientemente he sentido que el tiempo era ahora.He intentado en el pasado unas cuantas veces, todo lo cual fracasó.Mi primer intento fue sobre alguna mierda en el sexto grado que me alegro de no haberlo terminado.Tenía a mi padre en la cabeza con la puerta cerrada por algo que un niño dijo.Mi segundo fue después de que mi padre había arrojado basura por la habitación, golpeándome con ella, porque olvidé poner una bolsa en el bote de basura después de que saqué la basura.Yo iba a hacer una od.Eso fue en el octavo grado y me cagué y no tomé suficiente.Mi tercer intento fue después de Navidad 2016.Yo había tenido dos muertes en la familia ese año y sólo la abrumadora tristeza sobre toda mi familia me llevó a un nuevo grado bajo.
I want to dieI'm a failure. Worthless failure.
[ "selfharm" ]
[ "I want to dieI'm a failure.Worthless failure." ]
16
Quiero morir, soy un fracaso, un fracaso sin fin.
Who is single here HAHA cause I'm not 😎
[]
[ "Who is single here HAHA cause I'm not 😎" ]
13
¿Quién es soltero aquí HAHA porque no soy
Need help with scholarships I just got accepted to the college of my dreams, but the cost is going to be a lot. I know this is probably not the best subreddit to ask this but what do I need to do to get good scholarships.
[]
[ "Need help with scholarships I just got accepted to the college of my dreams, but the cost is going to be a lot.I know this is probably not the best subreddit to ask this but what do I need to do to get good scholarships." ]
52
Necesito ayuda con las becas que acabo de aceptar en la universidad de mis sueños, pero el costo va a ser mucho.Sé que esto no es probablemente el mejor subreddit para preguntar esto, pero qué tengo que hacer para obtener buenas becas.
It feels like any day now I’ll finally give inI’ve been worn much too thin and I’d like to quit soon. Nothing I do or say makes the pain go away. Heartbreak compounded this pain but I’ve been feeling sure of my end for quite some time. I simply don’t belong here and must spare myself the torture of a life spent in poverty, depression and isolation. My only wish is that my parents won’t collapse in grief
[ "selfharm" ]
[ "It feels like any day now I’ll finally give inI’ve been worn much too thinand I’d like to quit soon.Nothing I do or say makes the pain go away.Heartbreak compounded this painbut I’ve been feeling sure of my end for quite some time.I simply don’t belong here and must spare myself the torture of a life spent in poverty, depression and isolation.My only wish is that my parents won’t collapse in grief" ]
98
Siento que cualquier día que pase por fin me voy a dar por vencido Me he desgastado demasiado y me gustaría dejarlo pronto. Nada de lo que hago o digo hace que el dolor desaparezca. Heartbreak agravó este dolor, pero he estado seguro de mi fin durante bastante tiempo. Simplemente no pertenezco aquí y debo evitar la tortura de una vida pasada en la pobreza, la depresión y el aislamiento. Mi único deseo es que mis padres no se desplomen en el dolor
No need for suicideBody will self destruct. No sleep in days. Loosing sanity. Muscles failing.....
[ "selfharm" ]
[ "No need for suicideBody will self destruct.No sleep in days.Loosing sanity.Muscles failing....." ]
29
No hay necesidad de suicidioEl cuerpo se autodestruirá.No dormir en días.La pérdida de la cordura.Los músculos fallan.....
I'm just vibing, man. Just chilling, laying down on my bed. Being comfortable.
[]
[ "I'm just vibing, man.Just chilling, laying down on my bed.Being comfortable." ]
24
Sólo estoy vibrando, hombre. Sólo escalofriante, recostado en mi cama. Estar cómodo.
What's the point of being alive through all of this suffering?I feel depressed and emotionally detached one hundred percent of the time. I try to think about how I could improve my life, but I don't feel happy or motivated to do anything. Doing menial everyday work is tolerable until I hit this emotional bomb where just looking at a piece of trash that needs to be disposed of, seeing that there is this little bit of work that will never end, just makes me have a mental breakdown. I feel constantly disconnected and I struggle everyday to stay alert and present, but obviously it is not possible for me to maintain a present and connectee kind. How am I supposed to find happiness? There is still nothing I could do and nothing I could have that could make all of the trouble in life worthwhile. What is the point of struggling to keep myself physically alive? Seems like all life is is trying to provide oneself with food and shelter so they don't die. I don't know. I guess I find it harder than most to get these things. And I don't know. I feel empty. I just feel fucking empty man. I feel constantly hazy. I don't have any money. I don't want to go into medical debt. I just don't know what to fucking do. Why do I have to feel like a fucking case study? It's infuriating. I am completely fucked up. My brain is completely, physically fucked up, and I don't understand how I can go on anymore. I don't understand how my life can ever feel like it was worth it. I'm just going to die having never lived and IT WASN'T MY FUCKING CHOICE. There's no help out there. I already tried therapy and it was uncomfortable ever minute. I couldn't even look the therapist in the eye. I didn't want to. And I didn't want to talk to anyone about my fucking problems. I still don't. There is no point in talking about it anyways. It just pisses me off. I can get a recommendation for an auto mechanic from someone, but they cannot help my brain. I am helpless and hopeless. I think it's cruel that I have to die this way. But there is no light at the end of the tunnel. There will never be a period of my life where I am happy and feel connected to the people in my life. I will never have happiness. I will never have joy. I just want to drink.
[ "selfharm" ]
[ "What's the point of being alive through all of this suffering?I feel depressed and emotionally detached one hundred percent of the time.I try to think about how I could improve my life, but I don't feel happy or motivated to do anything.Doing menial everyday work is tolerable until I hit this emotional bomb where just looking at a piece of trash that needs to be disposed of, seeing that there is this little bit of work that will never end, just makes me have a mental breakdown.I feel constantly disconnected and\nI struggle everyday to stay alert and present, but obviously it is not possible for me to maintain a present and connectee kind.How am I supposed to find happiness?There is still nothing I could do and nothing I could have that could make all of the trouble in life worthwhile.What is the point of struggling to keep myself physically alive?Seems like all life is is trying to provide oneself with food and shelter so they don't die.I don't know.I guess I find it harder than most to get these things.And I don't know.I feel empty.I just feel fucking empty man.I feel constantly hazy.I don't have any money.I don't want to go into medical debt.I just don't know what to fucking do.", "Why do I have to feel like a fucking case study?It's infuriating.I am completely fucked up.My brain is completely, physically fucked up, and I don't understand how I can go on anymore.I don't understand how my life can ever feel like it was worth it.I'm just going to die having never lived and IT WASN'T MY FUCKING CHOICE.There's no help out there.I already tried therapy and it was uncomfortable ever minute.I couldn't even look the therapist in the eye.I didn't want to.And I didn't want to talk to anyone about my fucking problems.I still don't.There is no point in talking about it anyways.It just pisses me off.I can get a recommendation for an auto mechanic from someone, but they cannot help my brain.I am helpless and hopeless.I think it's cruel that I have to die this way.But there is no light at the end of the tunnel.There will never be a period of my life where I am happy and feel connected to the people in my life.I will never have happiness.I will never have joy.I just want to drink." ]
276
¿Cuál es el punto de estar vivo a través de todo este sufrimiento?Me siento deprimido y emocionalmente desapegado al cien por ciento del tiempo.Trato de pensar en cómo podría mejorar mi vida, pero no me siento feliz o motivado a hacer nada.Hacer un trabajo diario menial es tolerable hasta que golpeo esta bomba emocional donde sólo mirar un pedazo de basura que necesita ser desechada, viendo que hay este poco de trabajo que nunca terminará, sólo me hace tener un colapso mental.Me siento constantemente desconectado y lucho todos los días para estar alerta y presente, pero obviamente no es posible para mí mantener un presente y una especie de conexión.¿Cómo se supone que voy a encontrar felicidad?Todavía no hay nada que pueda hacer y nada que pueda tener que haga que valga la pena todo el problema en la vida.¿Cuál es el punto de luchar para mantenerme físicamente vivo?Parece que toda la vida es tratar de proporcionarme comida y refugio para que no me mueran.
Do you guys have the same feeling?Do you ever just lay in bed,stay in the shower,or just sit in a corner and think and complain about how horrible life is and just wish you could end it all but don't have the guts to do it? It will happen to me if I'm just alone by my self or I'm feeling really down. I really try not to let it happen to me but it just happens to me. I always like to go for long walks on the dark night,really late at night and just walk in the middle of the street. Just waiting for a car to come and hit me
[ "selfharm" ]
[ "Do you guys have the same feeling?Doyou ever just lay in bed,stay in the shower,or just sit in a corner and think and complain about how horrible life is and just wish you could end it all but don't have the guts to do it?It will happen to me if I'm just alone by my self or I'm feeling really down.I really try not to let it happen to mebut it just happens to me.I always like to go for long walks on the dark night,really late at night and just walk in the middle of the street.Just waiting for a car to come and hit me" ]
133
¿Ustedes tienen la misma sensación?¿Alguna vez se acuestan en la cama, se quedan en la ducha, o simplemente se sientan en una esquina y piensan y se quejan de lo horrible que es la vida y simplemente desean que puedan terminar con todo, pero no tienen las agallas para hacerlo?Me pasará si estoy solo por mi cuenta o me siento realmente abajo.Realmente trato de no dejar que me suceda pero me pasa a mí.Siempre me gusta ir a dar largos paseos en la noche oscura, muy tarde en la noche y simplemente caminar en el medio de la calle.Solo esperando que un coche venga y me golpee.
I think theres a ghost in my apt. You probably read the title, I think that there is a ghost in my apt, so a little bit of background I live in an apartment that is very small, so I notice things that change immediately, I notice that the towels are not where they were, I hear noise from the roof, and possibly the freakiest thing that happened, my stove went on, it was late at night, I was scrolling through reddit, and then the stove, just, randomly went on, I quickly turned it off and went straight to bed, I didn't sleep much that night, so, yes I think theres a (probably lesbian) ghost in my apartment.
[]
[ "I think theres a ghost in my apt.You probably read the title, I think that there is a ghost in my apt, so a little bit of background I live in an apartment that is very small, so I notice things that change immediately, I notice that the towels are not where they were, I hear noise from the roof, and possibly the freakiest thing that happened, my stove went on, it was late at night, I was scrolling through reddit, and then the stove, just, randomly went on, I quickly turned it off and went straight to bed, I didn't sleep much that night, so, yes I think theres a (probably lesbian) ghost in my apartment." ]
150
Creo que hay un fantasma en mi apt.Probablemente leas el título, creo que hay un fantasma en mi apt, así que un poco de fondo vivo en un apartamento que es muy pequeño, así que noto cosas que cambian inmediatamente, me doy cuenta de que las toallas no están donde estaban, escucho ruido desde el techo, y posiblemente la cosa más extraña que pasó, mi estufa se puso, era tarde en la noche, estaba desplazándome por Reddit, y luego la estufa, simplemente, al azar se encendió, rápidamente lo apagué y me fui directamente a la cama, no dormí mucho esa noche, así que sí creo que hay un fantasma (probablemente lesbiana) en mi apartamento.
Asking for help is putting a burden on my best friend?Hi people of reddit. I'm in a really bad place lately, I don't really want to talk about it but basically I've been depressed and trying to deal with suicidal thoughts... My best friend knows that, and she's always patient and good with me if i'm telling her that I feel bad, but she also know most of the time I don't say anything because i'm like that it's just not in me to reach out easily. However, last tuesday I did, I called her and cried over the phone, she was listening and comforting me as best as she could. It was really great and I felt better afterwards but ofc it's not that easy to get rid of such thoughts and problems I know that it's a long way to go and I know that I need therapy ect but I'm on a waiting list for now... So in the meantime i'm just trying to survive. Last night, I made a suicide attempt.. It was my first one,I already self harm ect but I never really wanted to leave, however this time I really tried by hanging myself but the rope wasn't tied correctly and I fell on the floor after 30 seconds... I feel pathetic,I stayed in bed for 18 hours and I only reached out this afternoon to my best friend and usually I send her a message every morning so she was very worried. I told her everything was ok and she didn't insist and now she's barely talking to me and left me on seen since 5 hours... Do you think I should tell her I need her? Because it's just really make me feel down. I've got a lot of affection issues and I know that I can be too clingy... I feel a little bit down that she never really send me messages to comfort me unless I admit to her I'm having a bad day but I don't know if it's only normal and if it's just me wanting too much from her... She knows almost everything about me and these past months have been really shit... I'm kind of just going crazy over this because she's just so important for me, I don't have a lot of contact with my family because of years of physical and mental abuse, I now leave abroad and alone because of that and she's the only person I really let in so she's like the sister I never had...I'll be glad to hear your thoughts good or bad and I just needed to vent I guess. Thanks everyone that read so far, I'm sending you all good vibes <3
[ "selfharm" ]
[ "Asking for help is putting a burden on my best friend?Hi people of reddit.I'm in a really bad place lately, I don't really want to talk about itbut basically I've been depressed and trying to deal with suicidal thoughts...My best friend knows that, and she's always patient and good with me if i'm telling her that I feel bad, but she also know most of the time I don't say anything because i'm like thatit's just not in me to reach out easily.However, last tuesday I did, I called her and cried over the phone, she was listening and comforting me as best as she could.It was really greatand I felt better afterwards but ofc it's not that easy to get rid of such thoughts and problems I know that it's a long way to goand I know that I need therapy ectbut I'm on a waiting list for now...So in the meantime i'm just trying to survive.Last night, I made a suicide attempt..It was my first one,I already self harm ect but I never really wanted to leave, however this time I really tried by hanging myself but the rope wasn't tied correctly and I fell on the floor after 30 seconds...", "I feel pathetic,I stayed in bed for 18 hours and I only reached out this afternoon to my best friend and usually I send her a message every morningso she was very worried.I told her everything was okand she didn't insistand now she's barely talking to me and left me on seen since 5 hours...Do you think I should tell her I need her?Because it's just really make me feel down.I've got a lot of affection issues and I know that I can be too clingy...I feel a little bit down that she never really send me messages to comfort me unless I admit to her I'm having a bad daybut I don't know if it's only normal and if it's just me wanting too much from her...She knows almost everything about me and these past months have been really shit...I'm kind of just going crazy over this because she's just so important for me, I don't have a lot of contact with my family because of years of physical and mental abuse, I now leave abroad and alone because of thatand she's the only person I really let in so she's like the sister I never had...I'll be glad to hear your thoughts good or badand I just needed to vent I guess.Thanks everyone that read so far, I'm sending you all good vibes <3" ]
271
Estoy en un lugar muy malo últimamente, realmente no quiero hablar de ello, pero básicamente he estado deprimido y tratando de lidiar con pensamientos suicidas...Mi mejor amiga lo sabe, y ella siempre es paciente y buena conmigo si le estoy diciendo que me siento mal, pero ella también sabe la mayor parte del tiempo que no digo nada porque estoy como que no está en mí para llegar fácilmente.Sin embargo, el martes pasado la llamé y lloré por teléfono, ella me escuchaba y me confortaba lo mejor que podía.Fue realmente genial y me sentí mejor después, pero no es tan fácil deshacerse de tales pensamientos y problemas que sé que es un largo camino para ir y sé que necesito terapia ect, pero estoy en una lista de espera para ahora...Así que mientras tanto estoy tratando de sobrevivir.Última noche, hice un intento de suicidio.
I want to die but I dont know how toHi. I no longer want to live. I can no longer deal with the physical and mental pain I endure. I've tried so hard but I can no longer do it. I feel trapped though. I want to die but I have no clue how to end my life successfully and non violently. Any suicide attempt has to succeed as I know failure would make things 100 times worse. Can someone please point me to any information online that can help.
[ "selfharm" ]
[ "I want to diebut I dont know how toHi.I no longer want to live.I can no longer deal with the physical and mental pain I endure.I've tried so hardbut I can no longer do it.I feel trapped though.I want to diebut I have no clue how to end my life successfully and non violently.Any suicide attempt has to succeed as I know failure would make things 100 times worse.Can someone please point me to any information online that can help." ]
103
Quiero morir pero no sé cómoHola.Ya no quiero vivir.Ya no puedo lidiar con el dolor físico y mental que sufro.He intentado tan duro pero ya no puedo hacerlo.Me siento atrapado sin embargo.Quiero morir pero no tengo ni idea de cómo terminar mi vida con éxito y no violentamente.Cualquier intento de suicidio tiene que tener éxito ya que sé que el fracaso haría las cosas 100 veces peor.Puede alguien por favor señalarme a cualquier información en línea que pueda ayudar.
"Why are you so grumpy?" "What did I do?!" "What is wrong with you!?" "What's wrong?"STOP STOP STOP STOP STOP STOP STOP STOP WHY ARE YOU MAKING ME FEEL WORSE THAN I ALREADY AM FUCK OFF LEAVE ME ALONE OR HELP ME DO SOMETHING STOP STARING AT ME
[ "selfharm" ]
[ "\"Why are you so grumpy?\"\"What did I do?!\"\"What is wrong with you!?\"\"What's wrong?\"STOP STOP STOP STOP STOP STOP STOP STOP\n\nWHY ARE YOU MAKING ME FEEL WORSE THAN I ALREADY AM FUCK OFF LEAVE ME ALONE OR HELP ME DO SOMETHING STOP STARING AT ME" ]
86
"¿Por qué estás tan gruñón?""¿¡Qué hice?!""¿Qué te pasa!?""¿Qué te pasa?""Deja de parar Para de parar Para de parar Para de parar ¿Por qué me haces sentir peor de lo que ya me jodo dejarme sola o ayudarme a hacer algo que deje de asustarme
My birthday is in exactly one week h
[]
[ "My birthday is in exactly one week h" ]
8
Mi cumpleaños es exactamente en una semana h
Can Reddit stop resetting my subreddits I sort by new here and it resets to hot every time I close the app. It didn’t do that before
[]
[ "Can Reddit stop resetting my subreddits I sort by new hereand it resets to hot every time I close the app.It didn’t do that before" ]
37
Puede Reddit dejar de reestablecer mis subreddits que ordenar por nuevo aquí y se reinicia a caliente cada vez que cierro la aplicación.No lo hizo antes
No way outSo.. to start off I'm writing this to let out fustration no one can help I dont think. unless someones magically going to send me some instruments My name is "insert stupid name here" ... I'm 20 years old , a college dropout because I got kicked out of my house at 18 and lost my job around the same time I used to be a piano student... it hurts to think about pianos....... my favorite instrument.. I was a music major in college, specifically a pianist.. I had to sell my keyboard... and my guitar warped in the heat of my car and became unplayable I can't get a job... i tried..everything.. workforce, army, minimum wage, every fast food job in town and the towns over I just want to play music I always had music before to cope with everything, to play out everything.. it was my go to... my escape, without it.. I am worthless. non existant may as weill die because I have nothing to live for I tried a gofundme bullshit project that didnt help..zero dollars, after spending weeks spamming my links everywhere yet some crocodile fanboy named eco ed gets a couple of thousand to go to africa and punch iguanas... America, how you have failed me I can't even get aid because I was a college student.. how much sense that makes last song i recorded recently,,, after being able to use a piano which just brought up a montage of feelings www.youtube.com/watch?v=sct4JLLthmI from the movie amelie which I have yet to see , but I had the sheet music checked out the trailer on my 20 dollar garage sale computer which lags.. the original music is fantastic... it pains my soul to the depths I'd like to go to france and drown myself in one of their many rivers everything sucks, everything hurts theres no escape i tried spells, witchcraft, i tried being religious and going to church those people have more problems than I do... i wish.... I wished... that someone would see my video and be like.. hey... wow... let me go ahead and.. give this person something like a good hundred dollars to buy a keyboard or a guitar or something... people spend so much money on stupid things every day, I wish someone could give me a chance to have a reason to fucking exist everyday hurts a little more, ive started trying to just sleep through every day, hoping maybe one day I'll wake up and have a job offer... how sad that I cant even get a job at mcdonalds, i know theyll never call id like to end everything maybe i would be with my music again,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, I wish someone who had the power could help but they wont no one will
[ "selfharm" ]
[ "No way outSo.. to start off I'm writing this to let out fustration no one can help I dont think.unless someones magically going to send me some instrumentsMy name is \"insert stupid name here\" ...I'm 20 years old , a college dropout because I got kicked out of my house at 18 and lost my job around the same time I used to be a piano student...it hurts to think about pianos.......my favorite instrument..I was a music major in college, specifically a pianist..I had to sell my keyboard... and my guitar warped in the heat of my car and became unplayable\nI can't get a job...i tried..everything.. workforce, army, minimum wage, every fast food job in town and the towns over I just want to play music\nI always had music before to cope with everything, to play out everything..it was my go to... my escape, without it..I am worthless.non existant may as weill die because I have nothing to live for I tried a gofundme bullshit project that didnt help..zero dollars, after spending weeks spamming my links everywhere yet some crocodile fanboy named eco ed gets a couple of thousand to go to africa and punch iguanas...", "America, how you have failed me I can't even get aid because I was a college student.. how much sense that makes\nlast song i recorded recently,,, after being able to use a piano which just brought up a montage of feelings www.youtube.com/watch?v=sct4JLLthmI\nfrom the movie amelie which I have yet to see , but I had the sheet music checked out the trailer on my 20 dollar garage sale computer which lags..the original music is fantastic...it pains my soul to the depths I'd like to go to france and drown myself in one of their many rivers\neverything sucks, everything hurts theres no escape i tried spells, witchcraft, i tried being religious and going to church those people have more problems than I do...i wish....I wished... that someone would see my video and be like..hey...wow...let me go ahead and.. give this person something like a good hundred dollars to buy a keyboard or a guitar or something...people spend so much money on stupid things every day, I wish someone could give me a chance to have a reason to fucking exist\n", "everyday hurts a little more, ive started trying to just sleep through every day, hoping maybe one day I'll wake up and have a job offer... how sad that I cant even get a job at mcdonalds, i know theyll never call id like to end everything maybe i would be with my music again,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,\n\nI wish someone who had the power could help but they wont\nno one will" ]
277
No hay manera de salir Así que.. para empezar estoy escribiendo esto para dejar salir Fustration nadie puede ayudar a pensar.a menos que alguien mágicamente va a enviarme algunos instrumentosMi nombre es "insertar nombre estúpido aquí" ...Tengo 20 años de edad, un abandono de la universidad porque me echaron de mi casa a los 18 años y perdí mi trabajo en la misma época en que solía ser un estudiante de piano ... me duele pensar en pianos .... mi instrumento favorito .... yo era un estudiante de música en la universidad, específicamente un pianista .... tuve que vender mi teclado ... y mi guitarra torcida en el calor de mi coche y se convirtió en intocable no puedo conseguir un trabajo .... lo intenté todo.. todo. mi fuerza de trabajo, ejército, salario mínimo, cada trabajo de comida rápida en la ciudad y las ciudades por encima sólo quiero tocar música que siempre tenía música antes de hacer frente a todo, para jugar todo... era mi ir a... mi escape, sin él. soy inútil. no existe tal vez morir porque tengo nada para vivir por un gofundme folked yoh.
Day 3 of British weather being shit It’s so fucking dead outside what happened to the pissing sunnnnnnnnn
[]
[ "Day 3 of British weather being shitIt’s so fucking dead outside what happened to the pissing sunnnnnnnnn" ]
25
Día 3 del clima británico siendo mierda Está tan jodidamente muerto fuera de lo que pasó con el sunnnnnnnn
imagine going to ur crushes house and they have an american flag in they bedroom lmao if i saw that i’m turning around and walking out right then and there
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[ "imagine going to ur crushes houseand they have an american flag in they bedroom lmao if i saw that i’m turning around and walking out right then and there" ]
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Imagínate ir a la casa de nuestros aplastamientos y tienen una bandera americana en su dormitorio lmmao si vi que me estoy dando la vuelta y caminando hacia fuera en ese momento y allí
Anyone in San Antonio and want to chill?Some fucks from work obliterated my emotions tonight and to make it worse, my work is not considering harrassment "persay". So for the first time in my life, I get invited out to a bar for a drink with a coworker who've I've grown to like. As we're about to leave, he ducks in to the bathroom for a piss, and I decide I should too. As I enter, the other coworker who is in the stall taking a shit, is talking shit about me to this guy. Neither notice me standing right there. First the guy calls me a creep, then accusses me of killing my dog, then convinces the guy who invited me out to ditch me by lying to me about which bar we're going to then go somewhere else instead. As he finishes his shit and exits, he notices me. The only thing he says is "Well, I'm not going to sugar-coat it." whatever the fuck that means. He's never expressed his displeasure about me before to me, and was just caught talking shit and making up a pretty bad rumour that hit pretty hard since I had to give up my dog recently to save money. Also, coming back from Houston, the people I stayed with went through my logs and I caught them. THey lied when explaining themselves, so when I called them out, they actually bitched at me for 'not giving them enough info', even though I bought them groceries and was an open book that they failed to ask anything. Oh yeah, and some bitch reditor just had to use my dog against me in a thread where I asked advice on investing in a house. I'm fucking crushed. I just want a good friend here.
[ "selfharm" ]
[ "Anyone in San Antonio and want to chill?Some fucks from work obliterated my emotions tonight and to make it worse, my work is not considering harrassment \"persay\".So for the first time in my life, I get invited out to a bar for a drink with a coworker who've I've grown to like.As we're about to leave, he ducks in to the bathroom for a piss, and I decide I should too.As I enter, the other coworker who is in the stall taking a shit, is talking shit about me to this guy.Neither notice me standing right there.First the guy calls me a creep, then accusses me of killing my dog, then convinces the guy who invited me out to ditch me by lying to me about which bar we're going to then go somewhere else instead.As he finishes his shit and exits, he notices me.The only thing he says is \"Well, I'm not going to sugar-coat it.\"whatever the fuck that means.He's never expressed his displeasure about me before to me, and was just caught talking shit and making up a pretty bad rumour that hit pretty hard since I had to give up my dog recently to save money.Also, coming back from Houston, the people I stayed with went through my logs and I caught them.", "THey lied when explaining themselves, so when I called them out, they actually bitched at me for 'not giving them enough info', even though I bought them groceries and was an open book that they failed to ask anything.Oh yeah,and some bitch reditor just had to use my dog against me in a thread where I asked advice on investing in a house.I'm fucking crushed.I just want a good friend here." ]
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Alguien en San Antonio y quiere relajarse?Algunos polvos del trabajo borraron mis emociones esta noche y para empeorarlo, mi trabajo no está considerando el acoso "ensayo".Así que por primera vez en mi vida, me invitan a un bar para tomar una copa con un compañero de trabajo que he crecido a gustar.Como estamos a punto de salir, él se agacha en el baño para orinar, y yo también decido que debería hacerlo.Al entrar, el otro compañero de trabajo que está en el establo tomando una mierda, está hablando mierda de mí a este tipo.Ni se fija en mí de pie allí mismo.Primero el tipo me llama un cretino, luego me acusa de matar a mi perro, luego me convence al tipo que me invitó a salir de mi bar mintiéndome sobre qué bar vamos a ir entonces a otro lugar en su lugar.Mientras termina su mierda y sale, se da cuenta de que me está matando a mí.La única cosa que me dice es que no me voy a dejar de lado de lo que significa.
Virtue-SignalersI just got to say, that, the way people have treated me unjustly, makes me want bad things to happen to "good" people for this generation and generations to come.
[ "selfharm" ]
[ "Virtue-SignalersI just got to say, that, the way people have treated me unjustly, makes me want bad things to happen to \"good\" people for this generation and generations to come." ]
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Virtud-SeñaladoresSimplemente tengo que decir, que, la manera en que la gente me ha tratado injustamente, me hace querer que le sucedan cosas malas a la gente "buena" para esta generación y generaciones venideras.
Just want it all to endI have server OCD and I constantly feel guilty like I cheated on my girlfriend even though I know I haven't. I forgot to send her a snapchat for 10 mins after I got home and I have to way of proving I was home for that ten minutes and it's just making me feel dead inside. I've just been dealing with this so long and it's so exhausting I just want it to stop. It feels like life is just getting worse and worse I hate school, I hate my job, I constantly battle with OCD. I just wonder why I'm living this life of mine if it just sucks so much. I just needed to talk to someone I didn't know where else to turn. I can't tell anyone else because they will freak out I just feel like I want to die sometimes and tonight is one of those times.
[ "selfharm" ]
[ "Just want it all to endI have server OCD and I constantly feel guilty like I cheated on my girlfriend even though I know I haven't.I forgot to send her a snapchat for 10 mins after I got homeand I have to way of proving I was home for that ten minutes and it's just making me feel dead inside.I've just been dealing with this so longand it's so exhausting I just want it to stop.It feels like life is just getting worse and worse I hate school, I hate my job, I constantly battle with OCD.I just wonder why I'm living this life of mine if it just sucks so much.I just needed to talk to someone I didn't know where else to turn.I can't tell anyone else because they will freak out I just feel like I want to die sometimes and tonight is one of those times." ]
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Sólo quiero que todo termineTengo un servidor OCD y constantemente me siento culpable como si hubiera engañado a mi novia aunque sé que no lo he hecho.Olvidé enviarle un snapchat durante 10 minutos después de llegar a casa y tengo que demostrar que estuve en casa durante esos diez minutos y que me está haciendo sentir muerta por dentro.Solo he estado lidiando con esto tanto tiempo y es tan agotador que solo quiero que pare.Se siente como si la vida estuviera empeorando y empeorando odio la escuela, odio mi trabajo, constantemente lucho con el OCD.Me pregunto por qué estoy viviendo esta vida mía si es que apesta tanto.Solo necesitaba hablar con alguien que no sabía a dónde más acudir.No puedo decirle a nadie porque me van a asustar, simplemente siento que quiero morir a veces y esta noche es una de esas veces.
Should I hit on my sister's friend? Should I hit on my 14 year old sister's friend?
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[ "Should I hit on my sister's friend?Should I hit on my 14 year old sister's friend?" ]
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¿Debería ligar con el amigo de mi hermana?¿Debería ligar con el amigo de mi hermana de 14 años?
I feel like I am useless.I have autism, I’m 14 and I’m worried I won’t be able to get a job, idk what to do.
[ "selfharm" ]
[ "I feel like I am useless.I have autism, I’m 14 and I’m worried I won’t be able to get a job, idk what to do." ]
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Me siento como si fuera inútil. Tengo autismo, tengo 14 años y me preocupa que no pueda conseguir un trabajo, idk qué hacer.
I only want to talk with people who think suicide is rationalI've dealt with severe depression for 2 decades. They have been the longest minutes of my life. I don't have a reason to live other than not killing your self isn't cool. How do I change that? Is it possible to want to live after you have been through what I have? Who helps you want to live? If I call a suicide prevention number or go to the hospital they only give a shit about 1 thing me living no matter how hard that may be. These guys are selfish fucking cowards in my mind. They exist to help family members and are not here to cure depression. Honestly is there anywhere to go for that? It just seems that everyone wants to take away my shoelaces so I don't hang myself when I am wearing a shirt that would make a perfectly good noose. People think that because you have a law degree you have something to live for. Why not trust my judgement and let me slip away to peace? Because you are all a bunch of selfish pricks that don't give a shit about people in pain.
[ "selfharm" ]
[ "I only want to talk with people who think suicide isrationalI've dealt with severe depression for 2 decades.They have been the longest minutes of my life.I don't have a reason to live other than not killing your self isn't cool.How do I change that?Is it possible to want to live after you have been through what I have?Who helps you want to live?If I call a suicide prevention number or go to the hospital they only give a shit about 1 thing me living no matter how hard that may be.These guys are selfish fucking cowards in my mind.They exist to help family members and are not here to cure depression.Honestly is there anywhere to go for that?It just seems that everyone wants to take away my shoelaces so I don't hang myself when I am wearing a shirt that would make a perfectly good noose.People think that because you have a law degree you have something to live for.Why not trust my judgement and let me slip away to peace?Because you are all a bunch of selfish pricks that don't give a shit about people in pain." ]
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Sólo quiero hablar con personas que piensan que el suicidio esracionalHe lidiado con una depresión severa durante 2 décadas.¿Han sido los minutos más largos de mi vida?No tengo una razón para vivir aparte de no matarte a ti mismo no es genial.¿Cómo puedo cambiar eso?¿Es posible querer vivir después de que hayas pasado por lo que tengo?¿Quién te ayuda a vivir?Si llamo a un número de prevención de suicidios o voy al hospital solo les importa una mierda que yo viva sin importar lo difícil que pueda ser eso.Estos tipos son cobardes egoístas de mierda en mi mente.Existen para ayudar a los miembros de la familia y no están aquí para curar la depresión.En verdad, ¿hay algún lugar para eso?Parece que todo el mundo quiere quitarme los cordones de los zapatos para que no me cuelgue cuando estoy usando una camisa que haría un nudo perfectamente bueno.La gente piensa que porque tienes un grado de derecho por el que tienes que vivir.¿Por qué no confiar en mi juicio y dejarme escapar a la paz?Porque eres un montón de idiotas egoístas que no dan una mierda a la gente en el dolor.