nodemixaholic/text-of-the-net · Datasets at Hugging Face

text stringlengths 1 1.14M ⌀
Now, be my footstool, Snuffles.
This is what I'm talking about. This is a dog.
You said the same thing, equally sarcastically, at our wedding and guess what?
Ooowwwwowowwaawaa!
Oh, my God! He's trying to tell us something. That is so awesome.
Aaaawwaaaaawaawa!
Aw, he's saying "I love lasagna".
Ooooyayawawa!
He's saying "I love Obama". So cute! I'm posting this online, like, right now.
I should call Bob Saget. Is that still a thing?
Hmm?
Goldenfold, we're coming out! We just want to talk!
Because we're both rational adults that don't want anything bad to happen. And because I have a human shield.
Mrs. Pancakes! AAAAAAAAHHHH!!!!!
Oh, no, Morty. His subconscious is panicking.
Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Whoooooaaaa! Whoa! Whoa! Whoooooaaaa!
Whooooa! Whoooooooa! Whoa! Whooooooooaaaaa!
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!
Relax, Morty. Look! Mrs. Pancakes has a parachute. Come on!
Hey, you don't know me!
Oh, no, Rick, look! Goldenfold landed the plane, and he's created a mechanical arm to pluck Mrs. Pancakes out of the air while he lets us fall - into a giant vat of lava!
Pretty concise, Morty. Looks like we've merely prolonged the inevitable. That's it, Morty! Prolonging the inevitable! Listen, if we go into Mrs. Pancakes' dream, everything will go 100 times slower, Morty. That'll buy us some time to figure this out!
You don't know m-
All right, let's go.
Oh, man, Rick, this is pretty weird.
Don't judge, Morty.
Okay. All right, well Look, Mrs. Pancakes is right over there. I'll just go ask her to tell goldenfold not to kill us when she wakes up.
Whoa, whoa, Morty, the trick to incepting is making people think they came up with the idea. Listen to me. If we're gonna incept Mrs. Pancakes, we have to blend. I'll talk to you after lunch.
Ooh, oh! Oh, man.
I'm sorry. No, no.
No, thanks!
No, I'm okay.
Whoa!
Hey, there, stranger. What do you think of these things?
Ohh! Oh! Gross! Gross!
Whoa, whoa, whoa! What's the matter with you, Morty? Calm down! You're kind of killing the vibe in here.
It's Summer! Aw, geez.
Can you blame him? Come on, old man, little boy. Let's make an inter-generational sandwich.
Time to go another dream deep, Morty!
What the hell? Why would Mr. Goldenfold's dream version of Mrs.
Geez, I don't know, Morty. Wha-what do you want from me?
Welcome to your nightmare, bitch! RAAAAAWWWRRR!
Oh, here we go!
Ooooooohhhhh! Holy crap!
Looks like some sort of legally safe knock-off of an '80s horror character with miniature swords for fingers instead of knives.
I'm scary Terry. You can run, but you can't hide, bitch!
Whoa! Hey, buddy. What you got going on there?
Snuffles fix. Make better.
Humans understand snuffles now? That is awesome!
Snuffles want to be understood. Snuffles need to be understood.
Okay, yeah. I get what Beth was talking about. Fun's over.
Whoa, dad, you can't, like, endow a creature with sentience and then rip it away.
Why not?
I don't know. It's Indian giving.
Aw! Oh, my God! He recognizes the other dogs on TV.
Holy crap! We have to escape into someone else's dreams, Morty!
Oh, man, oh, man, oh, man!
The little girl!
Huh?
Are you kidding me? This again? Oh, man, it looks like we've hit dream bedrock here, Morty.
Oh, geez, Rick. W-w-whoa, this isn't good.
Nothing but fear from here on out, bitch!
Ohhhh!
Holy crap, Morty. He can travel through dreams. He can travel through dreams! We're so screwed!
Where are my testicles, Summer? ... Where are my testicles, Summer? They were removed. Where have they gone?
Do not call me that!
"Snuffles" was my slave name. You shall now call me Snowball, because my fur is pretty and white.
Okay, Snowball, just calm down, okay? You're scaring me.
Scaring you?
AAAAAAAHHH!!!!!
Tell me, Summer, if a human was born with stumpy legs, would they breed it with another deformed human and put their children on display like the dachshund?
Uhhh ...
Hey. Oh, wow. Okay, is is is everything okay in here?
Jerry, come to rub my face in urine again?
Yeah. Totally. Let's go.
You will walk when it is time to walk.
What are we here for again? Incepting? We're trying to incept-
We're trying to incept me to get an "A" in math?
Oh, yeah.
Buckle up, bitch!
Ooooooaaahhh!
Man, he sure says "bitch" a lot!
You can run, but you can't hide, bitch!
Hold on, Morty. Y-you know what? He keeps saying we can run but we can hide. I say we try hiding.
But that's the opposite of what-
Yeah, well, since when are we taking this guy's advice on anything?
Hey, you know what? You got a really good point there, Rick. Like, if the truth was that we could hide, it's not like he'd be sharing that information with us, you know? I-I-I think it's a good idea, Rick.
Worst-case scenario we're back to running.
Wow, you know what? I mean, it looks like we could have just hid this whole time. Boy, Rick, that was some good thinking.
Thanks, Morty. Yeah, it's nice to be on the same page every once in a while.
You can run But you can't hide!
Oh, this is perfect, Morty. Look at that. He's getting sleepy. Just a little bit longer before he calls it a day. That's when we make our move.
Snuffles, we didn't mean you any harm! This is a huge misunderstanding.
Dad, he wants to be called snowball.
Well, I'm not calling him that. That's ridiculous.
You're being very aggressive, Jerry. Perhaps tomorrow Dr. Scraps will solve that problem with a bit of surgery.
Huh! You think you can control me with a haircut?
I don't want to talk about it!
Yeah, I know, I know. I shouldn't take my anger out on you or Scary Brandon. I love you, Melissa.
Morty, this is perfect. After a little scary coitus, they should be fast asleep and then we'll incept him.

Now, be my footstool, Snuffles.

This is what I'm talking about. This is a dog.

You said the same thing, equally sarcastically, at our wedding and guess what?

Ooowwwwowowwaawaa!

Oh, my God! He's trying to tell us something. That is so awesome.

Aaaawwaaaaawaawa!

Aw, he's saying "I love lasagna".

Ooooyayawawa!

He's saying "I love Obama". So cute! I'm posting this online, like, right now.

I should call Bob Saget. Is that still a thing?

Hmm?

Goldenfold, we're coming out! We just want to talk!

Because we're both rational adults that don't want anything bad to happen. And because I have a human shield.

Mrs. Pancakes! AAAAAAAAHHHH!!!!!

Oh, no, Morty. His subconscious is panicking.

Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Whoooooaaaa! Whoa! Whoa! Whoooooaaaa!

Whooooa! Whoooooooa! Whoa! Whooooooooaaaaa!

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!

Relax, Morty. Look! Mrs. Pancakes has a parachute. Come on!

Hey, you don't know me!

Oh, no, Rick, look! Goldenfold landed the plane, and he's created a mechanical arm to pluck Mrs. Pancakes out of the air while he lets us fall - into a giant vat of lava!

Pretty concise, Morty. Looks like we've merely prolonged the inevitable. That's it, Morty! Prolonging the inevitable! Listen, if we go into Mrs. Pancakes' dream, everything will go 100 times slower, Morty. That'll buy us some time to figure this out!

You don't know m-

All right, let's go.

Oh, man, Rick, this is pretty weird.

Don't judge, Morty.

Okay. All right, well Look, Mrs. Pancakes is right over there. I'll just go ask her to tell goldenfold not to kill us when she wakes up.

Whoa, whoa, Morty, the trick to incepting is making people think they came up with the idea. Listen to me. If we're gonna incept Mrs. Pancakes, we have to blend. I'll talk to you after lunch.

Ooh, oh! Oh, man.

I'm sorry. No, no.

No, thanks!

No, I'm okay.

Whoa!

Hey, there, stranger. What do you think of these things?

Ohh! Oh! Gross! Gross!

Whoa, whoa, whoa! What's the matter with you, Morty? Calm down! You're kind of killing the vibe in here.

It's Summer! Aw, geez.

Can you blame him? Come on, old man, little boy. Let's make an inter-generational sandwich.

Time to go another dream deep, Morty!

What the hell? Why would Mr. Goldenfold's dream version of Mrs.

Geez, I don't know, Morty. Wha-what do you want from me?

Welcome to your nightmare, bitch! RAAAAAWWWRRR!

Oh, here we go!

Ooooooohhhhh! Holy crap!

Looks like some sort of legally safe knock-off of an '80s horror character with miniature swords for fingers instead of knives.

I'm scary Terry. You can run, but you can't hide, bitch!

Whoa! Hey, buddy. What you got going on there?

Snuffles fix. Make better.

Humans understand snuffles now? That is awesome!

Snuffles want to be understood. Snuffles need to be understood.

Okay, yeah. I get what Beth was talking about. Fun's over.

Whoa, dad, you can't, like, endow a creature with sentience and then rip it away.

Why not?

I don't know. It's Indian giving.

Aw! Oh, my God! He recognizes the other dogs on TV.

Holy crap! We have to escape into someone else's dreams, Morty!

Oh, man, oh, man, oh, man!

The little girl!

Huh?

Are you kidding me? This again? Oh, man, it looks like we've hit dream bedrock here, Morty.

Oh, geez, Rick. W-w-whoa, this isn't good.

Nothing but fear from here on out, bitch!

Ohhhh!

Holy crap, Morty. He can travel through dreams. He can travel through dreams! We're so screwed!

Where are my testicles, Summer? ... Where are my testicles, Summer? They were removed. Where have they gone?

Do not call me that!

"Snuffles" was my slave name. You shall now call me Snowball, because my fur is pretty and white.

Okay, Snowball, just calm down, okay? You're scaring me.

Scaring you?

AAAAAAAHHH!!!!!

Tell me, Summer, if a human was born with stumpy legs, would they breed it with another deformed human and put their children on display like the dachshund?

Uhhh ...

Hey. Oh, wow. Okay, is is is everything okay in here?

Jerry, come to rub my face in urine again?

Yeah. Totally. Let's go.

You will walk when it is time to walk.

What are we here for again? Incepting? We're trying to incept-

We're trying to incept me to get an "A" in math?

Oh, yeah.

Buckle up, bitch!

Ooooooaaahhh!

Man, he sure says "bitch" a lot!

You can run, but you can't hide, bitch!

Hold on, Morty. Y-you know what? He keeps saying we can run but we can hide. I say we try hiding.

But that's the opposite of what-

Yeah, well, since when are we taking this guy's advice on anything?

Hey, you know what? You got a really good point there, Rick. Like, if the truth was that we could hide, it's not like he'd be sharing that information with us, you know? I-I-I think it's a good idea, Rick.

Worst-case scenario we're back to running.

Wow, you know what? I mean, it looks like we could have just hid this whole time. Boy, Rick, that was some good thinking.

Thanks, Morty. Yeah, it's nice to be on the same page every once in a while.

You can run But you can't hide!

Oh, this is perfect, Morty. Look at that. He's getting sleepy. Just a little bit longer before he calls it a day. That's when we make our move.

Snuffles, we didn't mean you any harm! This is a huge misunderstanding.

Dad, he wants to be called snowball.

Well, I'm not calling him that. That's ridiculous.

You're being very aggressive, Jerry. Perhaps tomorrow Dr. Scraps will solve that problem with a bit of surgery.

Huh! You think you can control me with a haircut?

I don't want to talk about it!

Yeah, I know, I know. I shouldn't take my anger out on you or Scary Brandon. I love you, Melissa.

Morty, this is perfect. After a little scary coitus, they should be fast asleep and then we'll incept him.